Pardon My Take - Stone Cold Steve Austin + Mount Rushmore Of Sports Movie Characters

Episode Date: August 12, 2019

Antonio Brown is losing his mind over possibly losing his helmet. The Raiders are dysfunctional but none of it will be on Hard Knocks (2:29 - 14:17). Brooks Koepka is spearheading change in Golf while Brandis Dechambliss cries on the course (14:17 - 20:10). Who's back of the week (20:10 - 27:33). Mt Rushmore of sports movie characters (27:33 - 38:28). Stone Cold Steve Austin joins the show to talk about his new show, his career in wrestling, the best moments in the ring, the time he turned heel and broke Big Cat's heart, and how bleeding helped make his legacy (38:28 - 71:53). Segments include Bad Visual Auburn, Talking Soccer for Pulisic, Hurt or Injured Tim Tebow, and a Monday Reading about Jeffrey Epstein as a Seinfeld show. You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen, ad-free, on Amazon Music. On today's part of my take, we have Stone Cold Steve Austin in studio. Awesome interview. Uh, I fanboyed out. I apologize. Actually, I apologize.

I said no one. That was an interview of a lifetime for me. Uh, PFT, thank you for letting me fanboy out. I definitely, there was a few moments where I was just Chris Farley in the Paul McCartney sketch, uh, just being like, Hey, Stone Cold, remember that time? Remember that time that was fucking sick. Uh, but yeah, wouldn't you say, Hank, you were laughing during the interview, say it was one of, one of the funniest interviews we've done.

Mount Rushmore. Yeah. And Stone Cold's electric. And I'm not even, I'm not even a huge wrestling fan. Like that was at before my time and I was still loving it. So we have that. We also have Mount Rushmore of, uh, sports movie characters should be a good one. We have Antonio Brown, a little Brooks Kepka.

We have to defend his honor and then a Monday reading for, uh, Jeffrey Epstein. So before we get to all of that, part of my take is brought to you by the cash app, the number one finance app in the app store cash app is the most powerful way to send, spend and save. It's connected to the free cash card. The only debit card with boost. Just select a boost in your cash app, then instantly save it. Some of your favorite places like 10% at Chipotle or $1 off at all coffee shops.

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And I was going to say Antonio Brown's lost his mind, but that happened like six months ago, so he's just lost his helmet. Yeah, maybe his brain is inside of his helmet. I don't know. So I, I want to just start off by saying like, I actually think Antonio Brown is, I think there's something wrong with him. I think that he's like going crazy. He's had like an actual mental break.

That doesn't mean that like we can't joke around about the whole helmet saga because that is fucking hilarious. But I actually think that there's something wrong with the guy. So I kind of feel bad, but we've got great jokes about it. Well, I would agree with you. I think when he died his mustache blonde, that was probably sign number one. There also is like a weird, I agree with you, like there's, we're going to make some jokes about it because it is the number one story this weekend.

But it is a weird feeling being like, okay, so this guy is kind of going off the reservation and on top of all that, he is arguing that he wants to wear a helmet that has been deemed unfit by the NFL. That feels a little too like on the nose about all the, you know, brain health and everything when Antonio Brown's losing his mind and being like, no, no, no, I want to wear this helmet that will not properly protect my brain. I assume that's what the new helmets are doing. I would hope.

Tempersome or swag on the new helmets. Yeah. The whole thing is weird. The biggest winners in all of this are Steelers fans. If you're a Steelers fan, you must have had the best like three days just watching the internet roast Antonio Brown, roast the Raiders, have a grand old time with it. My biggest takeaway though is in a backwards way, all Raiders mystique has been lost because the Raiders, you know, if you want to talk about the swash, swash buckling pirates and

they do the autumn wind is a is a Raider and all that stuff and Ken Stabler and John Madden, it basically comes down to this. If the Raiders were to just give Antonio Brown his old helmet and just pretend that it's not happening, they would possibly get an infraction, a penalty, a fine, whatever it may be, but they won't do that. And guess what? Man card Raiders because the old Raiders, they would just let them wear like a fucked up helmet and be like, guess what?

We just want our guy out there. Exactly. They should do that. You're absolutely right. Mark Davis should should take his balls out onto the counter of the P.F. Changs and be like, come get the money from me. I'm poor. People forget that Mark Davis, he doesn't have good cash flow or just flow.

Yes. Any kind of flow in general for Mark Davis. But yeah, he could just say like, we're not going to pay you the money in a fell. Come and take it. And then all of a sudden they're not the Raiders. They're the Raiders again. Right. And that's what that's what we all want.

I mean, I so Antonio Brown, it was comfortable. I get that he was like, you know, he had his helmet that allowed him to see the field, see the ball more easily, and they're trying to make him change to a new one that probably irritates most people. But every other player in the NFL is like, yeah, I guess I got to wear the new helmet. I mean, like for us, like a good analogy, can you imagine if journalists such as ourselves, you know, just spent weeks bitching about the fact that they changed the new layout on Twitter, like we in your real life job.

We can't do that. I give up. You never do that. Let the machines dictate their terms to you and you say, thank you, sir. May I have another update? So you're saying Antonio Brown just needs to go to Google Chrome and get that plug-in and just hack through it. Yeah.

He needs to get the extension. Whatever the open source thing is, he just needs to just deal with it. It's a good point because we all have certain things that we get used to and then complain about. It's just weird that it's Antonio Brown and this was supposed to be like, you know, he basically complained his way out of Pittsburgh, new start, fresh start. You have the foot incident where we still don't know what's wrong with his feet. And then you have this where he's just no showing because he can't wear his old helmet.

I love the visual of him sneaking into practice with an old helmet and they keep having to ban him. Like every day he wakes up, he's like, all right, this one has been painted correctly. Like it's got all the same look. And then he shows up and the equipment staff is like, dude, you're wearing, like it's very clear you're not wearing the right helmet. You need to go. And this just goes on and on and on.

And it will be, I think, going on and on. I mean, Antonio Brown really does sound like he might just retire if he can't wear this helmet. Yeah. I mean, that's honestly like the most relatable thing ever is to have a minor inconvenience so bad that you want to quit your job. It happens to everybody. Yeah.

I actually really liked it. And I do want to know more about who was painting his helmet. Like was this him? Did he like go out in his garage with spray paint? Did he have a buddy that did it? Did he enlist the help of Deuce Gruden to just like, just flex on the helmet? I don't, I want to know the mechanics. I want to know like exactly what happened and how he was painting it because basically

what he was doing was, you know how when a player is traded and then all of a sudden the internet's got photoshopped to them, like with their old helmets, but just a different color like immediately, that's what he was doing with his own helmet. He was using like his old Pittsburgh helmet and just spray painting it silver. Okay. So the two bad parts about this whole story, number one, well, actually we mentioned number one. There's actually three bad parts.

The new brown con is losing his mind. Number two, this was the fastest and the internet has killed the joke. I think the people tweeting just, you know, pictures of other people in helmets. Very, very good. You know, we saw the old leather helmets. All the jokes were taken up almost instantly because it's one of those controversies that is lighthearted enough that you have everyone getting, getting a, you know, open, open-minded open night at the chuckle hut.

And then the third, what it was, it was, you saw it on Friday afternoon. It was, everyone had their memes. Everyone had their, you know, when I saw like rich eyes and going off on, on a helmet stuff, I was like, okay, we're, we've, everyone's picked apart this car. It was SpongeBob in a helmet like faster than you could say the word go like they were already out there. Right. And, and me and you, it was, this was weird.

I was on a plane and I was reading the Mike Silver thread and I got bleep out his name and I got to, I think the 13th post where it said that, uh, that he was doing the spray painting stuff and I was like, holy shit, this needs to be on hard knocks. So I quote, tweeted and said, like, we need this on hard knocks. Are we riot? And the first thing that comes up in my feed is you tweeting, like, we need this on hard knocks. Are we riot?

About a minute and a half before I did. So credit to you. So I played your eyes. Yeah. Credit to you for investing, but even are we riot got run into the ground within like three minutes. Oh, oh, listen. We're not, when we, when we criticize other people of killing jokes instantly online,

we are including ourselves. Oh yeah. 100%. I mean, that is, yes, I'm a serial killer. That's why we get to say it. Yeah. That's why we get to say it because we just, we take every week, I just spray everything in sight.

If praying spray when it comes to tweets about this stuff, I'm the Ted Bob jokes. So the, the, the third, the third part, which you just kind of touched on the, the, the fact that you, you stole my tweet, which was fine, not a big deal. It's not going to be on hard knocks. None of this is going to be on hard knocks. So I, because the Raiders aren't going to fucking let it on hard knocks. It's going to be the most disappointing hard knocks on Tuesday night. They will touch on it.

Sure. But we will not see Antonio Brown trying to sneak in with a bad helmet. We will not see Antonio Brown yelling at the training staff. We won't see John Gruden flipping out being like, come on, what's going on with this man? That was a terrible job. No, that's good. That was good.

We won't see any of this. We won't see any of this. And it will be so fucking disappointing on Tuesday night because the whole world is expecting it. So now PFT, we as journalists have to be ready to riot because we said we'd write. Yeah, we did. So we got to write. Tell you what, man.

I see this kid coming into practice wearing this helmet, man. I haven't seen so much controversy about another man's helmet since Tim Tebow was cutting up penises. You know, that's, that was my, that was like two, yeah, one point. No, what? No, that was John. No, that was John Gruden. It feels cheap to rope in Tim Tebow.

Is that a transition? Yeah. No, I was just, I didn't, then you'd be cooking. I didn't really have anything in my head. I was just going to be John Gruden until you guys set to stop. So I killed that joke too. Good. I made a quick list here before we move on.

Quick list. A couple theories about Antonio Brown. Maybe he might be autistic because this is something like seriously, this is something that an autistic person would get very attached to their helmet. Like it's their tool that they use and they don't like being told when maybe he's got Aspergers, Asperger versus Rothesberger, the Battle of the Burgers. I made a list of things that like the possible next scandals for him because so far we've got him landing in a hot air balloon, him burning his feet and now the helmet thing.

So like just a quick possible next thing that Antonio Brown might do that we're not going to get to see on hard knocks. I think probably at some point he's going to show up in a stealer shirt just because that was in his, that was in his closet and he's just used to wearing that. I could see him getting a bird too. He strikes me as a guy that is teetering on the precipice of acquiring a bird to follow him around everywhere. Bird or bird or like one of those membered Justin Bieber's monkey, like one of the like

he. A problematic monkey. Yeah. Like a monkey or like something that can get loose at Raiders practice with some kind of animal that will just wreak havoc and we will have a headline and Antonio Brown lost his snake at Raiders training. Yes. I could something like I could see that happening.

I also think that at some point he's going to like this is probably the next three weeks. He'll have this news conference where they ask him how he likes being on the Raiders and he'll just be like it's my job to be a Raider. So I guess I'm a Raider like a very non plus right and they'll sit way too close to Jeff Darlington in a huge fucking living room and when they do the wide pan would be like whoa you guys are touching this is fucking creepy helmet to helmet man basically going dick to dick docking in this living room with Darlington man. And we said stop.

Okay. So it's only around. Yeah. We're not going to see it on hard knocks. I'm going to say it right now. It's going to suck. I'm pissed. Whatever.

But we'll write the other news we had. Yeah. We are going to write it. So tune in Tuesday night for whatever riot we figure out we're going to do. Well it's going to be like three weeks until the period. No. No. It's what happens in real time.

Dude. Huh. It's week by week. Yeah. I thought it was like two or three. No. No. We're going to watch them play the Rams this week.

Oh wow. It's week to week. That up to date on it. Yeah. I thought it was like two weeks behind. No. No. No.

We're going to get to see Bortles this week. No. I think it's up. Yeah. I think it's up to like two days before they basically they. Yeah. Shout out to them. They fucking cut that shit up quick.

Yeah. I was I was thinking like putting riot on the schedule for like two weeks. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. pace of play is only baseball and golf. Like the two most boring sports to watch tells you a lot about what like that right there. You should be like, you know what, let's go speed golf because if we're talking about pace of play, it probably means people are taking

naps during our games. So, so essentially Brooks is leading the charge of pace of play, make golf fun. And Brandy Chambi or what was his name? Now this, I can't get right below the two guys he's going against. Yes. Yes. I was, I'm in the same place. Brice Lee, Brice Lee, D champ, Chambly. So it's a combo. No, it's Chambliss de Brick's flow. Yeah. Breesie Chambliss de Chambi's credit for coming after like just people with the weirdest names makes it very easy on us to make fun of them. Yes. Absolutely. Hard to fall. Yes. Hard to fall for dumb brains like us, but very fun that he's going after these guys. So he started the day basically tweeting at Chambi's saying, don't worry, I wasn't in the way Chambliss.

If it was you playing, I would never stand there since it's Rory. I felt pretty confident. He would shake it. Essentially he's saying Brandy Chambi's is saying that Brooks doesn't follow the rules of golf, like the gentlemen rules of golf by playing fast. He's getting in the line of sight of the guy he's playing with, but it seems like Brooks is like, yo dude, Rory know Rory also wants to play fast. This is totally fine. And then what's the other guy's name? Bryson's day. Dan Damley de Chambliss. Either way, I guess the end of the day, Brooks is the only one who's fucking standing up for the people of the world who want to watch fast golf. That's really what it comes out to. Yeah. Honestly, did you see what Bryson

de Chambliss was doing this weekend? It was pretty absurd. I don't know. Yes. I don't know really the rules of golf etiquette because you have to be, I think like a rich person growing up to be really inducted into them, but I'm pretty sure that you're not allowed to take three and a half minutes to line up a putt from eight feet and then miss the putt. If you make the putt, I think people overlook it. But if you miss that putt, then we're going to have an issue. And I also found out today his nickname is the scientist. Give me a break. He's a big Coldplay fan. Yeah, huge. Nobody said it would be easy playing with you because you're slow as fuck. It sucked watching him play. And then Bryson showed

up to the tournament today and went up to Brooks Caddy and was like, Hey, if your boss has a problem with me, you can say it to my face of all the people to do that too. Brooks is probably the last guy because I don't think Brooks is scared of anyone. No, literally anyone. He says he speaks his mind. That's why he's a Blake. So he was like, okay, cool. He showed up and the caddy was like, Hey, that Bryson dude is, is, is crying all over the course. And Brooks probably went up to it was like, what are you going to do about it? And he's like, I'm sorry, sir. Your muscles are awesome. And you're fucking cool. Can you can you introduce me to the PMT guys? Yeah, Bryson Bryson was like, you know what,

you talk a big game, but I highly doubt that John Daley would say that to my face. It's like, yes, this is the guy that loves to say things to people's faces. So they had a conversation and then they asked Brooks what was said. He's like, we began a conversation. We're going to finish it later. I am here for like a fight, like an actual brawl on the golf course. I think that'd be awesome. We talked to kill him off with absolutely distraught. Well, it depends if you catch him after he's like been cutting weight for a week and he's down to like skinny Brooks, then I don't know. Yeah. I don't know. Also Bryson wears he wears the news boy hat. That's another thing that I learned about Bryson today because he's

he's very extra. You got to be careful with that. I've made this mistake before. If anyone dresses even remotely like Payne Stewart and they can then just pull the Trump card and be like, Oh, actually it's in tribute to Payne Stewart. Now you're the asshole. So always be careful. Well, you can't you can't dress in tribute to Payne Stewart and then act like this Bryson. Payne Stewart. True. Payne Stewart would complete a round of golf faster right now than Bryson DeChambeau. Here's the here's the one good thing about this whole controversy, whatever you want to call it, the pace of play controversy that hopefully we will get things fixed and golf will be faster. Tiger weighed in. So you know that now it's going

to be, uh, you know, maybe some things will change. He said, I know this is a complicated issue. Hopefully it can be addressed in near future. Good job, Tiger. That was that's such a quote. That was a, that was a, that was a quote from Tiger Woods in 2008 talking about the pace of play. So it's definitely going to get fixed. Golf is for sure going to fix this. PGA tours said that they were going to fix it. They were going to look into it and, and Brooks is like, I don't know what you're supposed to look into. They are breaking the rule. Yeah. Just play a little bit faster and make it more fun for people watching at home. Yeah.

Imagine if they had a caddy or like a kid just follow them around with a shot clock. He's so good. That'd be amazing. Standing behind Bryson with his stupid news boy cap looking like dropkick Murphy's accountant. Either way, Brandy Chambies get the fuck out of here, dude. Enough of you. Enough of you. Both of you. The replies to his tweet were so funny. Everyone just shitting on Brandy. Dude, you're the worst. Um, okay, let's get to who's back before we do that. What if the guys who made some of the most outrageous R rated comedies like super bad and sausage party decided to make an R rated comedy starring 12 year old boys? Well, they did and the result is a hilarious new movie. Good boys. Good

boys follows three in over their heads, six graders as a skip school one day to do whatever it takes to learn how to kiss before their first middle school party. The thing is they're just completely clueless about all the inappropriate situations they get themselves into along the way, like accidentally getting involved in a drug deal causing crazy car crashes and mistaking sex toys. None chucks. You've definitely never seen a movie like this before. It's so funny watching these innocent 12 year olds try to navigate an adult world full of sex drugs, violence and profanity. It's super inappropriate and R rated, but there's all also a sweetness to the movie with the boys friendship at the center of it all and ever

since South by Southwest. Early audiences and critics have been raving about good boys saying that you'll laugh for 90 minutes straight. They're calling it delightfully inappropriately, inappropriate, wildly raunchy and undeniably sweet. Check out good boys in theaters August 16th. We're going to watch that too. Maybe we'll do a movie review. Hmm. Hmm. Hank. Yes, who's back? Who is back? Go. My first who's back actually only have one. My who's back the week is little kids crying and just a little league world series in general. It was on this weekend. It was basically the only thing on. So I actually think this is good. I don't know if there's a hot take or not, but the regional part of it before the

actual little league world series is almost more exciting because you can like sometimes I feel like teams, the team of destinies go and just get smoked by like random teams from over the world. But the America versus America, like Kentucky, Iowa versus Minnesota, like, yes, those games are electric. And I feel like if you win your regional, going to Williamsport is basically the championship because you basically get to just go and party as a 12 year old for an invite party. I mean, you know, play ping pong, chocolate Sundays and yeah, and stay up till midnight. So just getting there and you can tell like the whole world forever. Hey, we went to Williamsport. That's a cool thing. You don't really have

to win at Williamsport for it to be a cool story to tell the rest of your life. Also, who's back with that? Todd Frazier. He played in the league world series and now he's a Matt and he's, I guess he pumped up the New Jersey team to win their state title. So people forget Todd Frazier. There was, there was a, this kid, Jameson, cause Nia hit it. He had like a go ahead home run. Oh, the big boy. Was that those the moment you look for?

Yeah, he was a beast. PFC, do you see this? They listed his, his numbers too, which I thought was kind of mean. You're like, all five, three, one, 65 of them. That's just power. That's condensed power right there. Yeah. No, that is pretty messed up that they did that. I agree with you. I love the regional matchups, especially if you get like two midwestern teams going at each other. Like that's always fun to see the local kids playing against each other. And then there's the, the near cousin of the little kids crying that's back in association with little league world series. And that's

the coaches wearing tactical, tactical sunglasses that know that the camera is on them and know that they're miked up and they give these like life lesson speeches and then people on Twitter brag that they're crying while they're watching it. There's a lot of content to be made out of these kids. Yes. Big time. It's kind of like that guy. What did you guys think about the guy for the Browns that returned that kick and everyone's like, this is why sports are the best. Cause he, I guess, I think it's the same thing as going to Williamsport though. Like that guy never played, but he's

always going to have that. Okay. All right. That's fair. But I, the whole time I was, I was thinking all these people who are just doing this for retweets, saying how this is why sports are the best. What are they going to say when he gets cut in a week? Sports are the worst. This is why sports are the worst. Yeah. This is why sports are the best. What the hell? Yeah. No, at least that guy put out a good piece of tape. He's got a resume out there.

You can build off that. All right. PFT. What do you got from who's back? My who's back of the week is unpopular opinions because there was a doozy that made the rounds this weekend. Unpopular opinion. Eating raw cookie dough is worth the risk of Salmonella poisoning. That's a spicy one. That's a spicy unpopular opinion. That was not an unpopular opinion. Dude, who gets Salmonella from fucking eggs anyway? Yeah.

That's such bullshit. It's literally just scaring you so you don't eat cookie dough. Yeah. It's like telling people if you swallow gum, that's bad for you. Right. Exactly. Exactly. It's big science. It's trying to keep us down. I think, honestly, the whole raw eggs thing was started up by alphas because they didn't want betas to be able to use their training techniques. So they were just like, oh, you

might get a tummy ache if you eat raw eggs. And so all the betas were like, yeah, good point. I'm not going to eat raw eggs, making them even more of betas. So it was a great trick that us alphas pulled on the world. My other who's back of the week is Nathan Peterman. That was mine too. Nate Peterman. Can I just have it because you already have one? Nate Vic is back.

Nope. Okay, that's no. Why? No, I was saying, can I have it because you already did one? Yeah. That was mine. Oh, you only had one who's back of the week? Yeah. It's who's back of the week.

Why don't you take my other who's back of the week? Which is? Killery Clinton. You have three? Yeah. Killery. You have three? Yeah.

Okay. No, no, I tell you what, I'll hand the baton. You got, now, Nate Vic is yours. Okay. So, Nathan Peterman is back. That's my who's back of the week. A good pick. Big one.

Good choice. Yeah. Thanks. Thanks, dude. Just watching him out there was fun. But the other part of the who's back of the week. I don't know if you guys follow Warren Sharp. Very good Twitter follow for all your football stuff.

He caught this. The Raiders announcer. Okay. So, the local Raiders announcer said that Derek Carr is going to have a big year because it's well known that the sixth year for pros is always a big leap year for them. So, when you take the next step. It's the sixth year. Uh-huh.

The sixth year. So, year six is usually for a quarterback is when it all starts coming together when things slow down. We were talking about it earlier. So, the Derek Carr, between that and Hard Knocks, the Derek Carr media, you know, hype machine that's trying to get behind a guy who we really know who he is. And that's not a terrible quarterback, but he's not a superstar quarterback is very, very funny to me because they're basically trying to wheel themselves into Derek Carr

as our starter. It's going to be great. Derek Carr, no, no problem. John Gruden loves him. And then you have Nathan Peterman busing off fucking 50 yard runs looking like the stud that he is. That's right. So, yeah, watch out, Derek Carr.

You're in trouble. You can't throw an interception when you're 50 yards downfield with a cornerback eating your dust. Tough for Mike Lennon to out intercepts Nathan Peterman. That is, that's bad. That's a great look. That's bad for sure. Yeah.

It's bad for your job. It is awesome seeing him out there. I hadn't heard that stat about six-year quarterbacks, but it makes sense. Robert Griffin finally won a playoff game last year, his sixth year in the league. Yes. So, I'm buying it. Everyone knows six-year. I'm buying it.

The six-year bump. You got it. We've all talked about it. Everyone knows you got to give that quarterback the first five years of their contract, then re-up them to just make sure that maybe they will be the best quarterback in the end. I'm looking up who else was drafted in the 2013 drafts that I can adjust my fantasy rankings accordingly. We got it.

Okay. I'm on it right now. Oh, there were like no quarterbacks taken. This is E.J. Manual. Oh. Yeah. So, be on the lookout for him.

Definitely. We have a big year. Yep. Then nobody else. Geno Smith. Oh. Yeah. Geno Smith.

Big time. So, he's in Seattle. Back up in Seattle. Him and Paxton Lynch. Yes. So, those two are going to be gunning for the starting backup job. We should do a Mount Rushmore backup quarterbacks by the way. Matt Barkley.

Huge. It's a relief year. Huge. Well, probably not because Josh Allen's a stud. By the way, I know this is ridiculous to just say it, but I did wake up on Friday morning and I lost my Broncos bet because Paxton Lynch came out and played well. Yeah. I mean, that's just a fucking, that's just a sick joke.

How did you bet against Paxton Lynch in a revenge game? It was such a fucking sick joke that I somehow am still losing money because of Paxton Lynch but it's in a preseason football game. Fuck it. Oh, my mistake. That was the 2013 draft. So those guys, those guys had their bump last year. Great.

Great. Great. Yeah. Okay. You'll notice. Yeah. You would notice if you look at the stats. I was wondering, I was like, I don't know how much higher E.J.

Emanuel can get in his career. Like that's because he just had his bump last year. Yes. He just peaked. He was waiting to peek. All right. Let's do our, let's do our Mount Rushmore. We have the Mount Rushmore of sports, movie, characters, PFT Europe first.

All right. Before I go, guess who's, guess who's sitting in the bump this year? Bordles. Who? Hell yes. Bordles year. Hell yes. Brutal move by the Rams, by the way, to make him do the promo without a hat on.

That was fucked up. That was very tough. I'm taking notes Rams. Even though you're his current employer, you're on the list. Johnny Manziel. Big bump. Well, yeah. Every year's bump.

I mean that. All right. So I'm going first on this one. Whale tail of a bump. We killed that joke too. Okay. Mount Rushmore of sports, movie, characters. I'll go first.

I'm going to go. With Rudy. Oh, okay. I gotta go Rudy. Wait for a lot. A lot of tweets tomorrow. He was offside. Five foot nothing.

150. Nothing. Whatever it was. Yeah. He might have been offside, but he was on sides of my heart. Okay. Hank, you have second pick. My first pick also is a one-namer.

Rocky. Rocky. Good one. Good one. Okay. I'll go. I'll break it up. I'll do two names here, guys.

So my first pick, I'm going to go with Shooter McGavin. All-time heel. Yes. All-time heel. And my second pick, I'm actually going to go with what? What are you mad about? No, I'm not mad. What?

I had happy. I just. I mean, Shooter's better than happy. So it sucks for you. Yeah. Shooter makes that movie. Okay. So my second pick is actually going to go to the animal side of things.

I'm going to take Hercules the Beast from Sandlot. Good pick. Yeah. That's Leroy. Thank you. Good job. Well, no, his name's Hercules. Yeah.

His name's Hercules. Good job. Good pick. It's Hercules. Big dog. The Beast from Sandlot. Yeah. Coach Joost.

Remember the Titans. Okay. Okay. You love Remember the Titans. I fucking. You love. You have an addiction to Remember the Titans. I have.

I honestly. I watched it on TV again the other night. I know you did. I had it on. I think I had it on VHS. I probably have watched that movie. Potentially four digits. Potentially in the thousands.

You. Every line, line for line does not get old. The blocking, the two scenes at the end when he like the sunshine's blocking is just unbelievable. Yeah. The greatest blocker of all time. Greatest lead blocker of all time. Hank is watching like the world fall apart with the racial divide in our country.

He's like, why don't we just fucking sing ain't no mountain high enough. Yeah. In a bus. We'll all fucking be cool. That movie solved racism by making black players and white players live together. Yes. Yeah. Good job.

All right. Your hall favorite. All right. My two. I'm going to go happy Gilmore. Happy Gilmore all time. Okay. All time character.

I'm not going to say the water boy, but I felt like at times the water boy was racist against people from Louisiana. So I'm going to take happy Gilmore instead. And then in my third one, this kind of wild card one, I'm going to go with Bob Uker from Major League. So the announcer, the announcer, Bob Uker made that movie. Yes. Very good.

Very good character. Very good character. Okay. Hank, your third pick. Oh, there's just so many. There are so many, but I'm going to go for the personal. Well, again, like, remember the Titans have also seen this movie, maybe a thousand times, just because I had it on VHS or DVD or whatever.

Sanka coffee. Cool runnings. Okay. Pick a pick. You want to go John Candy. RIP. I like Sanka better in that movie. Okay.

John Candy. Jamaica. You dead. Bob sled. That is it. I think they're making that into a Broadway musical. I might have made that up. I fucking hope so.

I might have made that up Broadway like a indoor Bob sled. That'll be cool. I feel like I feel like I'm going to, if I didn't make that up, they should do it. That maybe that's one of those ones where my brain is too far ahead of what's hot on Broadway because they should have cool runnings. The Broadway adaption. Let's see. Cool runnings.

No. Yeah. Totally made it up. I'm going to reverse Hamilton and do the story of the Jamaican Bob sled team, but just have it be like a bunch of like old white guys from the Pacific Northwest. Fuck. Fuck. I made that up.

Okay. All right. My last two. I'm going to go with Irma Kraken. Kingpin. Bill Murray also gave us a hall fame gift. One of a very, very, very funny movie. And then my last pick, I'm going to go with Henry Roengartner because if you weren't a

kid growing up in the nineties and you didn't think, Hey, maybe if I just break my arm, I too can be a major league baseball player, then that wasn't a special movie for you. Roger bagger. That's any, you know, he, he still throws out the first pitch at Cubs games like once a year. It's very, that's great. He's got, and I've still, yeah, and I still expect him to throw like 105 and it just doesn't happen.

So, and then he has the Epis. All right. Hank. I'll go with coach. Oh, the blind side. Oh. Panda pick. Panda alert.

It's a good choice. It's a good choice. It's a good choice. I think the kids from the blind sides and AWL, by the way. Really? Yeah. Pretty sure. Michael Orr.

Yeah. Shout out Michael Orr. All right. Your last pick. All right. My last one is I'm going to go an old school one, the Hanson Brothers from Slap Shot. Okay. Yeah.

RA will vote for you. RA will launch a campaign for me. They were the original bad boys. Slap Shot's one of those movies that if you ever played hockey growing up, you got forced to watch it. You got Clockwork Orange and had your eyeballs peeled open and you were made to watch that movie and it still holds up. It's a funny fucking movie.

All right. So, this is going to be one of those Mount Rush ones that we do and everyone's good. There's going to be a million. How could you not? Yeah. How could you not pick this? So, let's start with how could you not and we're talking about hockey. Gordon Bombay, Goldberg the goalie.

Herbrooks. Herbrooks. I mean, Mighty Ducks, that's another one where if you watched it growing up, I remember I wanted to play hockey and then similarly to Antonio Brown, I couldn't get the helmet off and it fucked up my ears and I was like, I quit hockey and you can also freeze your feet and hockey too. So, it's very dangerous sport. And Happy Gilmore and Mighty Ducks, like everyone in their life has tried to do a knuckle puck

and everyone in their life has tried to do the half of it and it never really worked. We were talking, PFT, we were talking, I was saying beforehand that Hoosiers is probably my favorite sports movie, but the characters just aren't, the singular characters aren't like strong enough, like my favorite character is Jimmy, but he doesn't even talk. No. So, I would throw him up there. The main character in Hoosiers was basketball, was the sport. Right, exactly.

So, yeah, the love of the game and just being in an Indiana driveway, a gravel driveway, shooting jumpers all afternoon. I also had Sea Biscuit as one of my honorable mentions, but I didn't want to get into big debate of whether or not horses were athletes. I left that one off. Okay. Debbie from Debbie. She's a Shuddlesworth.

Yeah, I'm getting there. Mm-hmm. Picture me. Yup. Do you think that Rocky... Michael Jordan, Space Jam. Yup. Do you think that Rocky is the best character in Rockies?

No, the dog is my question. The dog. No. Well, I was going to say, Drago is... I think Club of Clubs was the best villain. Yeah, but Drago was every, like Drago... Well, Drago was the existential threat of Russia. Wow.

Tank. Deep. Drago was more than just an enemy. It was allegorical. Good point, Hank. Yeah. Billy Hoyle, White Man Can't Jump. I wrote down Wild Thing, obviously, from Major League.

Coach Carter. Coach Carter. Benny the Jet. A lot of coaches. Billy Bob from Varsity Blues. Yeah. Yup. Big one.

Is he dead or alive? Dead. I think he's alive. I think he's dead. Okay. Okay. Look that up. RIP, if he is dead.

R-Bad on that one. Rod Tidwell. And then the only other one I wrote down, you guys can tell me, is this a sports movie or not? Johnny Utah. From Point Break. It is a movie about surfing. You can make the case.

Ron Lester passed away in 2016. Billy Bob. Fuck. R-I-P. Moment of Silence. He survived by the pig. Moment of Silence. Okay.

Okay. Moment of Silence. All right. So there's a lot that I'm sure people will come up with. We'll throw it out there. G-Baby. G-Baby. Fuck.

There's so many. God damn it. This was, we should have done like, who can tap out first and just done a list of like 50 each, just to see how deep could it go. Do you want to, do you want to do an extra one for Trey Wingo, if Trey Wingo was in this trap? Because I feel like- Jackie Moon.

Yeah. Jackie Moon. Ricky Bobby. Ricky Bobby for sure. I was going to say, he probably likes Michelle from Dodgeball. Patch is a hula hand. He has patches on there. Yes.

Oh yeah. Dodge a wrench. Mm-hmm. Okay. He also just passed away. Oh, and then the brother that was played by the guy from Star is Born, Bradley Cooper in Wedding Crashers. Yes.

Yes. Yes. Crab Kicks in Football. Absolutely. All right. Let's get to our interview with Stone Cold Steve Austin. Very excited for this one before we do it. Our friends from Stitch Fix, I think everyone here uses Stitch Fix, am I right?

Yep. I'm wearing a shirt from Stitch Fix right now. Wow. I like that. So, Stitch Fix will hook you up. PFT said he was wearing Stitch Fix right now. I get a box sent to me every single month. I love it.

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weeks, once a month. Whatever you want to do, you can get a bunch of stuff, just a few things. Stitchfix lets you customize everything. So get started today at stitchfix.com slash PMT and get an extra 25% off when you keep everything in your box. Go to stitchfix.com slash PMT, stitchfix.com slash PMT. Go check them out right now. All right, here he is, Stone Cold Steve Austin.

Okay, we now welcome on, I mean, you're a role model, you're an idol of mine way back in the day. It's Stone Cold Steve Austin. I'm a little speechless because you are actually someone that like, if I had a list of three people that are like on the, you know, pinnacle of my idols, it's you, Michael Jordan and Dog the Bounty Hunter. How do you think about that being in that kind of company? Not your speechless.

That's, that's an interesting selection there. Yeah, you like it. I do. You like it. Hey, before, and before the cameras were rolling, you offered to give me the shirt off your back. I did. Can you turn up my volume?

Yeah. Hank, Hank missed that. You walked in, you're like, Hey, I like your shirt and I just ripped it off my back and I said, here you take it. Oh, you can do, you want it? No, no, no. Please, please. Okay.

I like it when you have your shirt on. All right. So it is Stone Cold Steve Austin. Welcome to the show. We're very excited to have you on. You have a new show coming out straight up Steve Austin, August 12th on USA Network. Everyone's excited for that. We want to talk about that real quick.

No. Okay. Boom. Done. Done. That's what we're here for. Of course I want to talk about it. Okay.

And then I get a chance to hang out with celebrity guests and do cool things. And it's kind of like a talk show with many moving parts and we're never indoors. We're always outdoors doing cool things. And whether it's, you know, I'm interviewing someone or we're just doing something that from their life or they're doing something from my life or just finding common ground. Obviously, I like to laugh a lot. Now, as used to watch me at Stone Cold Steve Austin, a lot of people would think, Hey man, this is a serious cat.

He's always mad. He's going to be mean. But I'd rather laugh and then do anything. So I think any humor is a common ground to bring people together. So just hanging out with people, having a good time. And it's kind of an extension of my podcast, an extension of some of the hosts, the shows that I've hosted in the past. So, and all of a sudden you get 85 people hanging around filming you.

It turns into this whole different animal. So I had a lot of fun shooting it, had some great guests, hopefully is received in a high fashion and we get a chance to continue. Okay. So you mentioned doing a podcast because like just hearing Stone Cold Steve Austin be like, I got my podcast going and this is kind of an extension. It's kind of like, it's a little surreal because you used to feed off the energy of a live crowd out there, right?

They would get really into you. They would pump you up. You'd pump them up. I remember the speech that you gave, the what speech telling the story about a man named Jed when everybody was just like calling response. You fed off that stuff. Now you do a podcast. So you sit down in front of a microphone and you talk into just, you know, a piece of equipment.

There's nobody around you firing back. How do you get amped up doing that without somebody like egging you on? You know, it's a different, it's a different animal. And I remember when I first did my first podcast, some six years ago, I went to the studio and I now operate out of my house or I turned my house to the studio, but I rolled in there and I didn't really know what to expect. Because I'd done so much live television and I'd been Stone Cold Steve Austin or different variations of that guy for so long.

I was used to having that instant feedback from that crowd and that's kind of your gas pedal and get that gas pedal and get a response and you go accordingly. So all of a sudden I think, oh, okay, I'm going to start a podcast. I'm Stone Cold Steve Austin. I got to get the gas. So I'm going to be good as gold. Hell, man, we started, this was a test. I hit the wall in seven minutes and all of a sudden I didn't have anything to say.

So it was like, it was a real come to Jesus meeting. I'm like, okay, you get to learn some stuff here. And I went back, you know, I learned how to start taking notes and that was just a debut podcast without a guest. But you got to put in the time, put in the work, you know, do your research and be prepared. But it's an interesting dynamic. And I'm totally used to talking now without waiting for a crowd to roar. But it was an adjustment in the beginning.

Did we make a mistake not bringing beers into this studio for you? Almost all of the shows that I've done today have offered me a beer. But you know, I'm not offended that you didn't. We're trying to do the like, we're trying not to be, hey, Stone Cold, here's another beer. You play into the character and we couldn't find your beer and I didn't want to offer you something that wasn't yours. And that's what just happened.

Someone brought out a, you know what, and I was like, man, this ain't broken skull, right skull. So anyway, and I do have a long day ahead of me for me to show up on another show all trash because I've been hanging out with you guys drinking beer all day would be unprofessional on my part. So yeah, I took a couple of sips. I don't want to look hoity-toity, right, right, a couple of swings. So you're good.

We're good. Yeah, I'm good. 100%. You took me the shirt off your back. You took the shirt off and handed it to me. It was a great moment. It didn't even think it. It was true.

You're the kind of guy. I can always say, hey, man, to God. You call me. You give me the shirt right off his back. Absolutely. All right. I want to talk about a lot about the attitude era. I told you I was a huge fan.

Let's start with just your entrance. Do you still get chills when the glass shatters? Yeah, man. It's a drilling rush. It's a spike. As you can't explain, you know, it's, and you live and die by it. Recently, we just went down to Tampa for the Monday night, you know, it was like the raw reunion.

And I was like, for the WWE.com, they were asking me, hey, you know, we're used to the Stone Cold Pop because it's kind of a phenomenon, right? And I'm not patting myself on the back. No, that's a fact. You just asked me the question. I watched all three hours of that show for the pop. Yeah. So, and I said, hey, man, I said, I know it's going to be good, but anything less than fantastic

or spectacular is going to be a letdown for me because I've heard them all. And you live and die by that. Well, when I came out of the gate, man, the place, it blew the roof off the place. So it was, it was an amazing feeling. And I'm not a drughead. So I can say, but if you could bottle that feeling that I feel when that glass hits and you could sell that make a lot of money. What's the number one in your, in your career that you think back, the one that you close

your eyes and you're like, that was it. Well, there's so many, but there's that one time when the Rock was wrestling, Mick Foley Yep. And DX and they were creating all kinds of havoc. Vince McMahon was by the ring and all of a sudden mixing a bunch of trouble. And then here comes Stone Cold and they hit that damn music and it was a built moment. You know, they build those moments, you know, but I got to be the guy and the music has a big part of it.

But when I came out there to help him win that championship and then the eruption when he penned the Rock for the three count, that was one of the top ones. Yeah. No, you got to understand it. That was a great match. But you also got to understand, finally, when I turned from the ringmaster and the Stone Cold, you know, the music that I had to begin with was, you know, laid back, boring, lulling. Oh, it's terrible.

And so then I started to get a little bit of hands on when I came up with the Stone Cold thing. And I said, Hey, do you have any ideas for some ring music? I said, you're damn right. I do. So I took Rage Against the Machine Bulls on Parade to Jim Johnston. I said, it ain't this song, but it's in the vein of this song. And so why he thought about the glass breaking the Stone Cold, I mean, and then he put the

sirens in. But it's the whole thing was a masterpiece. And I give all the credit to Jim Johnston, but it was inspired at least in my head by Rage Against the Machine Bulls on Parade. That's pretty awesome. So you had, you know, too many outrageous stunts to count, really, whether it's running over the rocks, New Lincoln with the monster truck or driving the Zamboni into the ring or anything.

By the way, had you ever driven a Zamboni before? No. I was driven a monster truck prior to that. I was driven a couple because was that before after my next surgery? Because I started doing monster truck appearances. But I am the master, the absolute master of driving anything on wheels in 15 minutes. I'm not going to be an expert at it, but I can efficiently get the job done. And it's sink or swim.

If you're going to put me on live TV and put me in a monster truck or take, go to Nassau Coliseum when I drove the cement truck and to Philip Vincen's Uncomfortable Corvette, all those things folded down. And then I revved the motor to spin up that cement to dump in that Corvette. They didn't, we didn't have modern technology back in it, so they're like, here's a mark to hit. I just had to guess at the mark. So it was just fun to be able to do all that kind of stuff.

When I drove that monster truck into the arena, they put me into a holding area. I remember this. And it was like a two, two and a half minute commercial break. And that thing's running off methyl, alcohol, ethanol, alcohol, whatever. It's an 1800 horsepower motor. And I'm in there and I'm dying. My eyes are tearing up. I can't breathe because of the exhaust fumes that truck.

Well, you were also dead. I'm just waiting to come back on there so I can just get out there and get a breath of fresh air. Anyway, I get out in the arena and I guess it and the carpet so long and I just, I revved it up and I think four wheel drive was so awesome. It just jerked one of the camera guys off his feet because they shot the carpet right up from underneath him because all that horsepower. So all the shenanigans that they created for me really helped the character.

Do you think it's missing in today's wrestling? Cause just thinking about, you know, listing mall, the Zamboni, the court, you know, putting the cement in Vince McMahon's Corvette, all these off, off the ring things that happened is what made raw can't miss on a Monday night because you just didn't know you're with Booker T in a, in a, in a supermarket. There's all these things that would happen that you just had no idea what was going to happen next. And it feels like after your era, it kind of went away from that.

It was a lot more ring stuff. And it, well, it's interesting how, how the thing has changed and now it's three, three hours versus two hours and Smackdown is two hours. But when you used to watch, you know, back in the attitude era, we had the Monday night wars. Nitro had this hot open and then we had, had our, you know, pyro coming down, I mean, it was sense of urgency. You felt like anything could happen at, at any one time.

And it to me is just maybe I'm not picking on today's product, but I'm just think the spontaneity is lost like that, that feeling that anything can happen is lost. And if you bring it back and create that excitement, I don't think you need to go to, you know, fill it up, you know, this with that or crushing, you know, things, you know, uh, Braun Strowman has done some really cool things with, uh, his displays of strength, turning shed over and stuff like that. That's all cool. Sense of urgency, I think is the most important part.

Yeah. Was there ever any stunt that got brought up that you were like, no, this is too far? No, I never said that, but I'll never forget I was recovering from a neck surgery and, uh, I might have been eating a lot of enchiladas and drinking a lot of beer and went about 275. That sounds amazing. And it said, we need you in Charlotte. You're going to, you're going to drop a big parking block on, uh, the DX bus.

And luckily that went to post. But anyway, I went out there and learned how to drive everything like I just told you, but what they didn't show me was when it, when I was learning, they had to arm tilted down like this. So I could swing that cement girder way, probably weight about 400 pounds. But then when we were resting, they put it back to a high position. When I got it, it was in the high position. So I don't know that.

I'm just now trying to swing it, but it is not working like it's supposed to work. And in those, uh, those cranes, it's a vertical windshield and it's literally six inches from your face. And so I'm there on what's live to tape, they're going to take it back to post all of a sudden that thing starts swinging back and forth to that cab and it's swinging this way right at the cab. And I'm sitting there thinking on live TV for most of it, all intrinsic purposes. I'm thinking, Hey, I've got to wash my language.

I said, some bitches fixed and coming here and crushed my head. I'm dead. And it stopped that far from that glass cab and I wasn't selling it. I wasn't flinching and I wasn't moving. So I was committed. I was about to take an ass woman. It would have killed me. But luckily as fate turned out, I'm here talking with you and a pair of sunglasses and you

did just took your shirt off and got to give it to me. Hell yeah. Straight up Steve Austin. Yeah. Coming up on August 12th. Oh, hell yeah. Yeah. Um, what the, obviously one of the most interesting parts of your career is your relationship

with Vince McMahon, both on and off screen. What was it like off screen, but you know, behind the scenes, uh, one, did you ever sneeze in front of them and two, did you guys get along day to day? Yeah, we got along for the most part all the time. And it was funny. I tell people this that are still in the game. There was a day, you know, back when I was the guy, if I called Vince, his phone didn't ring one full time.

Hello. You know, because I was that guy. Hell, now I ring it goes voicemail and you know, I'm lucky if it calls me back. Right. Right. But, uh, we always got along for the most part and every now and then we would not, you know, see eye to eye on certain things. I remember one specific time in Cleveland, Gunterina, they had me booked with someone that I'd

already said, I would not work with this person. And we were in a room about the size of this one and man, I let loose with some real colorful language about, you know, there was a bunch of that going on and I let everybody know exactly what I thought because I told you, don't put me in this situation. You did. I said, now I'm the fucking bad guy. I said, I told you not to, not to do this to me. And it was much worse than that.

So there's, there's been those times and the time when they wanted me to, uh, fly down to Atlanta for Monday night raw and put over Brock Lesnar and the night before I was working in Columbus, Georgia with Rick Flair in the cage. So I was like a kid in a candy store working with a goat, right? And then, you know, of course it didn't show up because it wasn't time for me to do the favors yet for Brock and an unadvertised match in a tournament style, uh, TV match. Whereas Hey man, I love Brock Lesnar and I'll lose to him any day of the week, but build it up so we can all make money off of it and it's going to mean something.

And when you get a guy red hot, like I just had Hogan on the podcast and I'll put myself there. But when you get guys who really, really draw stupid money, that's a very delicate balance that you just don't take stupid liberties with or you'll kill it off and you can never recreate it. So I was very protective of myself, maybe too much so, but it took me seven and a half years to get there. So no one was going to yank the carpet out from underneath my feet, not even Vince.

They weren't going to do the monster truck, yank the carpet out on it. No, no, no, not that, but no, I'm in a great place with Vince right now. But, you know, the closer you are, the higher you up, the higher you are up on the card and on that ladder and with the money that we were drawing, you become very close. Okay. So with that said, can you apologize to me for WrestleMania 17? What did you not like to heel turn? I mean, the fact that that that moment when you heel turn and share a beer with

Vince McMahon and just waiting for you to be like, just kidding, stunner, I'm still waiting for that stunner. I'm still waiting on her too. And I've thought, rethought that thing so many times. And if I could call the, you know, the audible now, I would have just told him, Hey man, I ain't feeling it because here's, here's how I was feeling leading into that. I thought I was starting to flat line just a little bit. And I said, okay, man, a change is good.

And, and Vince always likes to do something big at a WrestleMania. What didn't have really anything big there? So I'd like, Hey, I'll turn heel. That's what we do. You get hot and then you turn heel and then it's even hotter. Most, most times, yes, but it has to be warranted and it has to be for a reason. Yeah. And all of a sudden when I did that, that night, if I could go back, I just said,

Hey man, I'm calling an audible and audible. Watch the stunner. Right. And then stunt his ass. It would have maintained my baby face run. So, so how much like creative input did you have day to day? And, you know, because I know there's obviously a script, but would you get to say, Hey, I'm not doing this or I want to do it this way?

And how much would they trust you? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, I had a lot of control and they put me a lot of, for the most part, always put me in really good positions to do great things. But I was one of the worst and I've told the story before. If I didn't like an idea, I would flat out tell you that's bullshit. And I ain't doing that. And they'd say, well, you got a better idea.

I'd say no, it was like three hours for live TV and they got to come up with a completely different thing for Stone Cold to do. So I was always the first guy in the building. I was always the last guy to leave. I'll work my ass off. But if I don't like creative, I'll let you know about it. Did you ever. So there, there's the creative process where they tell you what to do.

And you have to improvise a little bit. Sometimes you run into people that you're out there in the ring with. Mike Tyson comes to mind. So a guy that maybe was his first time ever in a wrestling ring on TV. He's not getting into it with you as much as, you know, he's not a trained wrestler. He's got no experience. Is there something that you would say when maybe things are flatlining a little bit out there to like try to get under his skin a little bit?

Or like, how would you mess with a guy that maybe doesn't have the experience that a professional would? Well, I mean, that, that situation never presented itself because when they brought him down, I think that was for us. No TV when they introduced him as the baddest man on the planet. And man, all of a sudden here comes Stone Cold because you're in my ring and you're going to come out there and insult me with your damn boxing. And so we got that little altercation where I got in his face and said, I don't

know how good you hearing is, but in case you don't understand what I'm talking about, I got a little bit of sign language for you. So here's to you. Always flip somebody off the double birds. If they're not getting into that much, yeah, when he shoved me back, he shoved me with everything he had. And I went flying and I went, it was damn near shoot. I'm going back for him.

And they're holding me back. Jerry Briscoe, who's a shoot wrestler, Sarge, all those guys, you watch how they're clawing and keeping at me because this has to be real. And if you go back and watch it and you watch closely, I don't know where Mike was going, but he had about $5,000 and $100 bills in his suit, suit jacket and $100 bills go fly everywhere. And all of his handlers because he had a posse, he had his team with him. All of his handlers are picking up all the $100 bills.

But there was never a situation where there was something I needed to do to get Mike to do this. And it turns out that Mike is a huge historian of the business and probably knows more about the history of the business than a lot of the guys. Would you would you go back and watch your matches on tape? Like to see what the fans at home are watching? Do what would you go back in? So after like a Monday night raw, would you go back and watch the television

feed to see what everybody was watching at home? No, no, no, man, I was really bad. You know, nowadays someone will email me a match or something like that. And I'll watch and my wife will say, well, what are you watching that for? I said, well, somebody emailed it to me and I forgot about it. But going back to back then, it was too hard because even in the stuff that I watch that I do now, I'm so I'm so critical of myself. I think, well, why didn't you do this?

Or like, let's go back to the Chicago match at Russell made a 13. I wanted to bring that up. That's wearing my ass out in the corner, right? And I kick him right in the balls, right? And we go down and he just he he does a classic cell and he's on his back. Now, when I go back and I start reaching for those ropes and I'm all messed up because he's been kicking my ass. If I could go back, I would have stayed there for two minutes.

OK, let two minutes is an eternity. Let's just say one minute. Can you imagine how that crowd would even come more than they did? Because they were they were with that match from from the open to the finish and the blood was off the charts. But had I built that for another 60 or 90 seconds, they would have started rumbling. And that's one of those what if type things where if I'm trying to rethink the match. So I want I'm happy you brought up that match because that match is kind of

wouldn't you say that's the match that maybe put you on the map as Stone Cold, the bloody face, the sharpshooter passing out in it. Do you think of it as that match? Like that's the match that put me at this different level. The match a year before would handpick me to work with him. Survivor Series at Madison Square Garden kind of started me. And of course, I was I was in transition. I was in the making was on the way.

But to answer your question, quite frankly and truthfully, yes. I think it's honestly this is going to sound stupid, but the bald head with the blood that has an image to it that you can't replicate with anyone else. Like when you when you would bleed, it was blood everywhere. Whereas if someone's bleeding with their hair, you see it, but you don't see it. When it when you were bleeding, it was just an absolute scene. I agree with you, Flair always had that mouthful of blonde hair. So, you know, hair work for Flair because, you know, it would be that big mess

could add so much hair that weren't good for him. But for me, for some reason, my viscosity of blood or how it works. I mean, because you're looking at a canvas, right? Yes. And all of a sudden, and none of those were really blood baths per se. You know, we've seen other ones that were much bloodier. But for some reason, blood works well with me and it just runs down my face and in a really good fashion.

And for some reason, God didn't give me a very good hair genetic, but it gave me a great shaped skull. So you apply blood, sweat and emotion. It really presents a hell of a picture. How bad do that sharps you to hurt for real? Oh, no, it's you feel some pressure. I don't know. The one on the tree was the most pain I've ever been in my entire life.

But you're supposed to say it was the most pain I've ever been in my life. Yeah. I believe I survived. I'm home. I'm talking to me. Oh, man, like a mother. Yeah, there you go. OK, yeah, I bet it looked like it fucking hurt. Damn, I can't believe you survived that thing. Fuck, I wouldn't give up, though.

The fuck know you were? Yeah, the the blood thing. So what what is who's your favorite guy to work with throughout all your years? Man, there's been so many. Ricky, the dragon steamboat is like one of the greatest of all time. And just the way he works, baby, you know, if you grab him in a headlock, he's going to come out and try to top risk you just on automatic reflex. It's not like you're telling him to do anything he feels in the gap,

even though me as a hill, I'm calling the match. He's going to do those intangibles that you know, I ain't got to worry about. And, you know, as far as chemistry, Brett, the hitman heart have just him and I have such a mutual respect for each other and kind of like to tell the same stories. And I think Brett's one of the grittiest, most realistic wrestlers there's ever been. I didn't hit flaring his prime and it got me when I was a little ragged. But my matches with the rock were always an interesting study

because I brought out the best in him and he brought out the best in me. And we were both these, you know, I was stone cold and he was the rock. So when you had just these gigantic personalities, these gigantic characters with all these emotions, coupled with the fact that we both complimented each each other's work style in the ring, magic. And also, I think you guys really made the announcing team better, too, when it was the two of you, because it really you had to draw a perfect line in the sand. Are you going with the corporate rock?

Are you going with the badass Steve Austin and hearing them take the rock side over you, just the crazy shit they would come up with the back of a man? That was probably that's why I asked you earlier about like, did you ever go back and watch? Because I think you'd really enjoy hearing what Jerry Lawler would have to say about your work, like, while you were doing it. Well, yeah, I like watching that. It's just like I just got finished talking to Hulk Hogan on a podcast a couple of weeks ago and going back and watching some of his stuff

and listen to Gorillamon soon and Jesse Ventura commentate on some of their matches. I mean, like, you know, and just he was always the heel and Gorilla was the baby. And he would admonish, you know, the baby face when he was doing something and, of course, cheer the hill when he was doing something. And so I can understand what you're saying. And when I watch it back, I give so much credit to Jim Ross for being the announcer because like when he's yelling, Stone Cold, Stone Cold, a yell at the top

his voice or the Texas rattlesnake. And also remember the Stone Cold character was in a gray area. I was not the traditional baby face and certainly not a white meat baby face as we know in a business. So they pushed me as a baby from a very nontraditional standpoint. And so Jim Ross would say, I don't know why they like him. Or I don't know why he couldn't just heat praise on me because, you know, he knew how to keep the kind of backhanded praise.

And it's an art form of getting talent over. That's what Jim Ross was so good at. And that's why I give him so much credit for being that guy for me. And of course, Lawler, Chip and Ann, doing the things he did in those high-pitched voices, magic, absolute magic. Would you say that you are the person who's responsible for the most middle school detentions of the last 30 years? Man, DX is in second place.

Oh, yeah, yeah. So I mean, like every time I'd be in detention, there would usually be like four guys in there wearing an awesome 316 shirt because they like flipped off their teacher. I said, I said between the years of like 1997 and 1999, I probably gave out like five to 10,000 stunners. Were you that guy? Yeah, I was just stunning everyone. Man, we was over in Germany one time.

I was working with guy and normally I call all the matches and for some reason guys work when he goes, Stone Cold Stunner, Stone Cold Stunners. I said, fuck it. I hit him with Stone Cold Stunner out on the floor. I hit my ass on the concrete. Here's the thing. The secret to the stunner is doing it in a ring because you got a little, a little bit of guilt.

I hit my damn tailbone and that damn every vertebra break in my back said, fuck you, don't ever do that again. So yeah, it works best inside a ring with a little bit of guilt. How did you come up with the stunner? Fayetteville, North Carolina, Michael PSA's comes up to me right before Monday Night Raw. Hey, kid, you got a second. I've been using the million dollar dream and he goes, I got something

I want to show you. So he showed me the stunner with a couple of enhancement guys. And so that's when I started employing it a couple of weeks later. Hey, we need a setup move. You know how Jacob Snake does the short arm DDT? I think he does a short arm clothesline before the DDT. It's a setup move. So you have the anticipation by adding the kick.

You have the anticipation of the stunner's next. Right. So it was a two stage process. Michael PSA's came up with both of them. That's fantastic. So all right. So it brings up a good part of the show here. I want to do a little remember when just I'm just going to embrace

being a fanboy here and I just want to do remember when I'm going to I'm going to embrace the guy that's been hit with a lot of steel chairs. You can't remember shit. OK, remember when your first stunner on Vince? Yes, Master of our garden. How was that the when you when you dropped that first center? I think he said you could do it the easy way or the hard way. And then boom, you stunned him.

The hard way, baby. If you remember, he almost slipped out, almost lost him. It could have been it could have been a botch that ruined everything, but we got it and that crowd just came on glued. No one had ever done it before. And of course, with his sale job, we called the crappie sale and crappie's a fish. Yeah, put a fish on a pier and they're kind of like this. He always sold the best.

Vince always sold the start of the best. And he's so uncoordinated. But yeah, that that was the magic stunner. And that was the stunner heard around the world. Yes, you would also do this thing where he'd act like he was having a seizure right? Yeah, all right. That was magic on the phone at the mouth. That's the synapses of the nervous.

Yes, I'm firing uncontrollably. Exactly. What about stunning Donald Trump? Hey, I give him a lot of credit. We was at Ford Field. The setup was a team versus team. Whoever's loser's team is going to get their head shaved. So, you know, Trump's not going to lose his hair. Right. So Vince gets his head shaved.

But before we go out, right before we go out, he goes, hey, Steve, I'm going to see if I get Donald to take a stunner. I said, really? He goes, yeah, I think I can get him to do it. So he goes, hey, Donald, come over here. And so he goes, this is Stone Cold Steve. Also, say, Mr. Trump, how are you? And he goes, listen, at the end of everything, when it's all said and done,

Steve has a finished move to Stone Cold Stunner. We think it'd be great if you took it. And all of a sudden, Trump's right-hand guy says, oh, don't take it out. There's no, they're looking to have you here. Don't do it. Don't do it. And then Trump looks at Vince and he goes, because of a bunch. And he goes, do you think it'd help? Oh, God damn, pal.

Of course, it blew the roof off place. So the guy agreed to do the stunner. So whatever your political opinions are, the guy was cool enough to take my stunner. Yeah, I mean, it's it's crazy that the president of the United States got stung. Well, a lot of times when they show that picture of all those people and they're sitting around Trump, I'm done. Like, I think 75 percent of them.

Yeah, right. Yeah, yeah, man, kids, yeah. Stunned them all. What about when you attacked Vince in the hospital? One of my personal favorites. Oh, I love that. Dressed up like a doctor. Yeah.

Was that a real hospital? Yes. And you just crushed him. Yeah. And then, you know, it was his idea that the edema thing. And I said, man, you're a twisted guy. Yeah. Hit him with a bedpan.

Yeah. The thing about the bedpan, because that was a huge stainless steel bedpan. Yeah. And so like I was over in the corner, like bouncing that thing off my head, trying to find a sweet spot. Because if you hit a guy the wrong way with that, I mean, you can kill a guy. I want to say. But the funniest thing about it was while Vince was doing his scenes,

like the nurse taking his blood pressure, getting his heart rate, taking his temperature, and he's being the sour patient, men, Mick Foley are in a closet about as big as my hat. And he's showing me Mr. Sago and he's fixing to start using that as a finish. He hadn't debuted it yet. Yeah. And so two grown men, because he was going to do a thing with,

with Yerpel, the clown and blow up the balloons and entertain Mr. McMahon and we're in there laughing our full heads off and they open the doors. And listen, you guys got to shut up so we can film this. We got to do the show. So that's what happened. And me and Mick Foley used to be, we used to be travel partners. So we're very dear friends. Yes.

But we did all that. But yeah, I hit him with that bedpan. And here's the thing. Had I just dinked it off of him and that killed the angle. So I laid it in. Yeah, you did. You did. Uh, what about the famous beer bath?

That was also another personal favorite. Man in the first, about the first 30 gallons that was real beer. And man, I rolled down there and we bought that hose out and I started spraying them. And then like as I was spraying, I figured, man, it'd be a great vision for me to get myself a drink of beer. But it was, it was coming out like, I don't know, like a hundred miles. So I basically ribbed myself because when I pointed at myself and I almost blew

my eyes out and drowned me at the same time. Like, shit, that wasn't smart. So, but I know sold it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. Did you, did you, uh, I feel like you never missed. We're going to wrap up in a second. I feel like you never missed cans when they were thrown to you.

Man, I got some hands on you. You have some hands. Yeah. Every now and then I get the rare drop, but my percentage, that was, I would love that. I got my, I got my hand. I was basically tied over here. Yeah.

I just caught a bunch for a raw at that reunion the other day. Yeah, you did. But man, Mark Eaton, and I, I'd give him the signal and some of them were so far away, you're like, Mark, we go, you're capturing. And I'd say, bring them. I'd say something different, but he would throw them. But he goes, and I'd say, yep. And so some of those things got launched.

I dare say close to 40 yards, but I've always been able to catch things. And hell, I played running back in high school. And then in college, I played linebacker defensive end, but hell, they should. If they love me, tie it in or something like that. I probably could have had a career. I believe it too. The hand size. That's what I got, but I can catch stuff.

I'm really good at catching alcoholic beverages. It's a God given talent. Everything else just kind of slips. I think it's because you really want a beer. I'm not going to do that as a catch, by the way. You had it in your hands and you weren't ready for it. You made a football mood. I'm going to eat this arm rest.

One more at the end of this interview. You'll see it. I'm going to make it make it up. You're also responsible for one of my favorite gifts of all time. We like to do this on a show called Behind the Gift, the one where you're swimming in beer. Do you remember that? Yep.

I'm going to pull this up for you. Yep. Can you explain what happened and whose idea that was for you to just go swimming in a pile of beer? Yep. This one right here. Doing the freestyle surrounded by probably what nine, 10 cans of bush right there.

Yep. How'd that come to be? Okay. So like anytime I was out there, even when I just went out to wrap up that reunion, when I stood up on the announcers desk and flipped the lid off of them, that was off the area. It probably was on www.com. Anytime I'm out there, I'm looking for prop.

I'm looking for something to add lib, something to utilize anything, no matter what it is. So all of a sudden I got a pile of beer in the middle of a damn ring. So sure I can walk in it. I can stand in it, but that's just walking in and standing in it. Who's going to forget, you know, me swimming in the beer? It just made sense. Yes.

And so like the undertaker, one time he had that symbol in the ring and it was laying on the third rope and leaning on the ring. And so I got on it and I was balancing like I was surfing. It's like the time I rolled down the office chair on that ramp and then crashed at the ramp. And you know, that was a huge crash. I threw that beer down and celebrated through my fingers up and everybody goes, oh, there's the greatest thing ever.

So I'm always looking for the opportunity to add lib, something to make something out of something that nobody else would see. Yeah. And I've done that my entire career. Once I turned into stone cold to utilize any prop, any situation I can. That's what I was doing. All right, because you remember, of course, I'll never forget. Absolutely.

Stone cold. Thank you so much. Straight up Steve Austin, August 12th on USA Network. This has been a thrill. You sure you don't want my shirt? It looks too good on you. I'm gonna give you my shirt as a pop. All right.

Thank you. Stone cold. Take my shirt. I'll wear it on the season next year. I'm taking a shirt. All right. I need to get a new shirt. It's all started with you.

Yeah. Yeah. That's your fault. She said there's something about a guy in Hawaiian shirt. Just makes you want to like him. That interview with Stone Cold Steve Austin was brought to you by Movement Watches 2019. It's the year of big tick energy and our friends at movement are providing just

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Download the SHIP dating app that's SHIP SHIP to start finding matches today. Okay, let's get to some segments. First up, we have a bad visual for the Auburn Tigers. So what exactly happened here, PFT? Okay, so the Auburn Tigers, they changed their logo over the weekend, but record scratch, they didn't change the logo. It was not referred to as a logo change. It was called a new visual identity system.

So again, to repeat, not a new logo. It's a new visual identity system. So they made the you smaller shout out like shots fired at Miami, I guess, but they de-emphasized the you, they made the you smaller to make it the same size as the A, but that's it's again, important to note, it's not a logo change. It's a new visual identity system. So this is like when the Browns, everyone, the Browns got a new logo and just slightly changed the pan, pan tone of the, of the color of brown.

And everyone's like, Oh my God, look at it. It's, they did a big, Hey, guess what? The new Browns logo is coming. Yeah. It was just the exact same thing with maybe one thing, like one piping different. That's what they're doing here. But yeah, but they're denying it. They're denying it.

They're kind of denying it. But the denial is I kind of buy it like a new visual identity system is a lot. That's different than a logo because a logo is a visual identity system. So they have a new one of those, which is not a logo. Got it. Got it, which is stupid because what they should do is just lean into it and then get all new sales from the new logo. Because if I know something about SEC football, if you slightly tweak the logo,

everyone will buy new stuff. They'll buy new stuff before they pay their mortgage before they get food on the table for their kids. They got to have the freshest new Auburn logo for the fall. Yeah. So that was a big miss by them. I'm going to be judging the fuck out of anybody I see rocking Auburn gear that has the slightly larger you and their visual identity system.

What a bunch of pores. No, not for me. What a loser. What a loser you have to be. I agree. Yeah, just just lean into it. Be like, Hey, yeah, we change our logo. Go buy some shit for us.

Also, I want to say I'm scaring myself because over the weekend, I was watching more NFL football because that's what we do. And the NFL logo, the 100 logo is starting to grow on me. Like just a little bit. I still I still hate it, but now it's starting to pop up on like refs hats. And I'm like, that's kind of cool. I'm liking this now. Right.

And then I catch myself and I'm like, no, PFT, you you made it. You made it take. You need to commit to it. But it's I'm like one percent every day feels important. Yeah, it feels important. Having the 100 logo, you're like, damn, this is important. This year is special. Something big is going to happen by next week.

I'm going to need it in more places. I'm going to ask how come it's not on the the concussion tent? Why isn't on the thing that the ref puts his head in when he's looking at porn or watching a replay review or whatever he does. I'm just going to say it right now, PFT, it'd be a pretty big power move. You had it as your letterhead on your on all the notes you take at your desk. Oh, I was going to say tattoo even. You said it power move.

Who who who would have to win the Super Bowl for you to get the 100 logo NFL logo tattoo? That's a good question. Who would have to be in the Super Bowl? If it was what if it was the Browns Lions, you have to get the 100 logo. If it's Browns Lions in the Super Bowl, I'll get the tattoo for sure. Yes. Yes. If it's fair, yeah, I I want to say I will too.

I will too. If Blake Bortles wins Super Bowl MVP, I will also do that. OK, so Blake, I'll I'll hand you in. And this is not this is not to say that we're anti Jared Goff, because we like Jared, no, but this is like a Blake. It's a Blake thing. Right. So it's look, it's nothing against you. It's not it's not you.

It's us. It's Blake. It's your name. It's like Blake was you before you. So it's like, what are we going to do? Is our first love that's going to hurt Jared's feelings. Sorry, Jared. Sorry, Jared. OK, Jared wins. How about this? Jared wins the Super Bowl MVP. We'll we'll party with him.

I have a beer, a cold Budweiser with you, Jared. Yeah, we'll come over his house and party deal. All right, we have a talking soccer. Pulsar stitch got in and I was talking soccer. Where? Chelsea. Peers. He's stung. Did he did? He's stunk. I watched the whole game. He's stung. He's not ready for the bright light.

I mean, he came in and it was one, nothing. And then Manchester United scored three goals, like ripped them off. And I'm just going to say, as someone who is ready to declare this the biggest moment in USA soccer history. Yish, maybe we have to start getting the narrative that he's not from America. So he didn't qualify for the World Cup. Yeah. Yeah. And he stinks for Chelsea.

And he spent most of his life playing in Germany. And by most of his life, I think like a couple of seasons. Come back home. Come back home and dominate the MLS, Christian. Bro, there's a spot for you on Kansas City Sporting or whatever the hell they're called. Waiting for this United was talking soccer. We just lost. Yeah.

And Rooney. Here you go. What happened to him? He went back over to England and I was talking soccer. Really? Yeah, he did. He's playing for like a second division team. He's a player coach now. Well, it's actually the championship league. So say it correctly.

Derby City. I think Derby City. I don't know what the hell it's called. But what are the fucking blowing this? I'm playing on your fucking pitch. All right. Last up before we get to our Monday reading, Herter injured Tim Tebow's out for the year and he should probably just retire from all sports.

That wasn't part of the headline we agreed on. Yeah, that was that was it's over. PFT. It's over. It's not over. It's not over. No, listen, I was looking at a slash line this year. It's not it's not great. He finished 2019 hitting 163 with four home runs. 19 RBIs 98 strikeouts in 239 at bats.

So not not not ideal, but we're waiting on the six year bump for Tebow right now. So, you know, he's still working hard. That's what's important. I think there was a point maybe before the season that you predicted that he would be called up to the Mets. No, I said I said that he should. I should. Yeah.

Are you sure you didn't say he will? No, I said that he should and that they're idiots for not having done it already. Because I've firmly been in the Tim Tebow is not a baseball player. This is all a gimmick and a carnival act and he should probably just stick to doing TV. Yeah, can you imagine if like some superstar athlete decided to try their hands at minor league baseball?

What a loser. He was a lot better than fucking Tim Tebow. Was it was his was his war a lot better. And if he had kept with it, he would have fucking he would have easily been in major league baseball. Wasn't for the strike. He easily would have. He absolutely had a better slash line.

But yeah, Tebow, here's here's what concerns me though about Tebow. He had a cut on his hand like three years, three weeks ago. And it still hasn't healed yet. And they're they're benching him for the rest of the season because his cut won't heal, which is like on your hand. That is a symptom of stigmata. That's bad. That is very bad. So we got to be worried about a lot more than just him

not being able to hit a curveball. Yes, correct. What what level was Tebow at? He was at triple A. So in double A last year. What? Yeah. In double A last year, he hit, I think, like two. I'm going to make this up to 70 something. There's no way.

No, it was pretty close to 270 something. His 270 last year. But here's something interesting. Saber metrics, his lifetime on base percentage. You know what that is? What? 316. Really? I just made that up. There's no. Yeah, I was going to say no way. No way. He doesn't walk enough.

He strikes out all the time. All right. Last up, we have a Monday reading. This actually comes from a friend of ours, sexual Jumanji at sexual Jumanji. Yes, this is Twitter. That was weird to just say. A friend of our sexual Jumanji. Just be normal. I'm sex J.

Yeah, sex J is what he goes by on these Internet streets. So he had a very funny thread about Jeffrey Epstein. I don't know if you guys heard, but Jeffrey Epstein quote unquote killed himself. By the way, do you have any conspiracy theories for this PFT? I'm going to defer all my conspiracy theories to the band, foster the people. You may remember them from the hit song, Pumped Up Kicks. And they tweeted out that it's not his body. It's a decoy body.

So he's alive, probably on a private jet somewhere. And they, they killed somebody else that looked kind of like him. This is the perfect conspiracy theory word. No matter what your political leaning is, you can just co-opt it to say the other side did it. Oh, for sure. It's insane. Yeah, everyone, everyone's pointing fingers. I'm waiting. Spider-Man meme.

I'm waiting on Neil deGrasse Tyson to point out the fact that every year, millions of children aren't molested. So why are we getting so upset about this? Yes. Yes. All right. So sex day had a tweet thread about a sign. He pitched a Seinfeld episode. We'll start here. A Seinfeld episode called The Inmate, where George is on tour of MCC,

Manhattan Correctional Facility. I don't know what the fuck the C other C stands for. And Epstein is like, hey, nice shirt, then ask George if he can have it. Then Epstein hangs himself with the shirt and George is walking around shirtless. This is actually, I believe this all as it starts. George, you tried to do the Steve Austin. You tried to get him to kill himself. Pretty much. Yeah, pretty much.

Here, take my shirt. George, I thought he just liked the shirt. How was I supposed to know he was suicidal? Jerry, you thought he just liked the shirt really? Kramer burst into apartment. You guys hear about Epstein? Wacked him. Jerry, oh, we heard. All right. George gave him his shirt.

Kramer, you know, they found him hanging by a shirt classic Kramer moment where he puts the pieces together. You could see him doing it where he does a little show. Yeah, yeah, points at him. George, you killed Epstein. This is. Listen, way too spot on. This is really, this is really, really good. But the one thing that is missing, I need a detailed breakdown

of how every character from Seinfeld would have voted so I can ruin my image of the characters. So like Jerry, I feel like Jerry's a solid Harris. I think he would vote Harris. George becomes a Bernie bro gets like full on into it at some point. Probably like he harasses some women online. And I don't have to work. Yeah, I don't have to work free health care.

Or he might he might be getting he might be Yang. I think Yang, yeah, I was going to say Kramer would be Yang gang just for the thousand bucks. Well, yeah, yeah, you're also, I don't know, some stuff in his background, I would say David Duke. George, I just gave him a shirt and might I add, it was a nice shirt, by the way. He was very grateful for Kramer. Oh, I bet he was grateful.

All right, Jerry. All right. All right, enough. So what if George killed Jeffrey Epstein? Elaine, George killed Epstein. Get out. Sex, Jay's a fucking genius for this. George, George back at prison. So I was here the other day on a tour and a funny thing happened.

And I seem to have left my shirt here. I was wondering if I could get it back. Prison guard, who, by the way, the only thing sex, Jay left out prison guard, who eventually will someday become like a huge star for his own sitcom. You know what I mean? Like prison guard is actually the dad from a modern family. Oh, I don't know. He's 21 years old.

Yeah. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. The other dad. Are they all dads in modern? That's like the premise of the show. Like here's a bunch of dads. Yeah, you know, the dad, though, you know who I'm talking about. Dad, the main dad. David Wallace look alike.

OK, fine. That's perfect. OK, David Wallace, this is the prison guards. David Wallace, a 21 year old David Wallace, prison guard, a shirt. Hey, wait a sec. Aren't you the guy who got lost on the tour and accidentally locked himself in a cell? George didn't think you'd remember that happening. Now about that shirt, it really is a nice shirt. It's been my family's generation, you see.

And then George standing next to a cute female corrections officer. You know, I killed Epstein. I love it. Fucking perfect. I love it. Sexy way to go. This is, yeah, the the the whole conspiracy theories going wild in the we just need football back.

I feel like if that happens on a on a fall on a, you know, like October, Saturday, Saturday morning, maybe we get the conspiracy theories for an hour and then everyone else moves on. Right. McNabb's like, I didn't know that a human life could end in a tie. And then we just step on to the next one and then he and then he's like, OK, but Missouri is about to kick off right now against Florida. So yeah, so SEC. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, no, but like it real like this is you were right when you said that this is one of those conspiracies that everybody can get in on. It's almost like bringing us together as a country. The fact that we don't believe the official story that we're being told about this. Correct. Correct. Everyone's like, everyone has the exact same idea at the exact same moment. Like he didn't kill himself. Yes, we know.

And then who's to blame? We don't know, but we're all just guests. I never know. You always have to ask, like, who stands to gain the most? I probably everyone you can cross me off. Yeah, everyone, you cross me off the list. I stood to lose a lot because I was going to release an e-book, a hilarious e-book about Jeffrey Epstein later on that day. And then I woke up and I was like, wow, no, these jokes are funny anymore

because he's dead. So I'm the real victim when we want to think about it here. Yes. Yes. All right. That is our show. We got Matt LaFleur coming on Wednesday. Bonus bonus training camp stuff. We'll see everyone that love you guys. It's part of my take presented by Bar Stool Sports. It's also brought to you by CBDMD.

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