Pardon My Take - The 2021 Takie Awards Plus Blake Bortles, Blake Griffin & Brooks Koepka For Blake Of The Year

Episode Date: July 28, 2021

The 2021 Takie awards are here with 23 categories including Best Load Management, Hacker of the Year, Take of the Year, 19 year old of the Year, Lib of the year, podcast listeners of the year and of course Blake of the Year with Blake Bortles, Blake Griffin and Brooks Koepka all zooming in to decide who is the official BOTY.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen, ad-free, on Amazon Music. On today's part in my take, the 2021 Takies. They are finally here. The Takies are here. We have 23 categories that are going to win an award, including podcast listeners of the year and Blake of the Year. I'm going to say this right now. I'll say it on the other end of the ad as well. No spoilers. Please no spoilers. People will listen to it right away. Don't spoil it for everyone else. It's a fun thing that we do. It's stupid. The Takies are funny, silly, whatever. Please no spoilers. Let people listen. But

the Blake of the Year, we have changed the rules. We have all three Blake's on this show to decide the winner of the 2021 Blake of the Year and again, 23 other awards that we're giving out. And we're doing it all with our friends at Coors Light. Coors Light's sponsoring the 2021 Takies. Do you ever feel like summer just flies by? What do you do when you need a moment to chill in the summer? What are those occasions that you look forward to savoring the most? Well, I look forward to savoring a nice, cold, blue mountain Coors Light. That's the best beer in the world to chill. It's the best summer beer out there. It's the coldest summer beer out there. Summers always feel like the shortest season, but we need to make the most of it. We just need to

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Colorado. CoorsLight.com slash take. Make sure you chill this summer with the best beer in the world. Okay, let's go. It's part of my take presented by Barstool Sports. Welcome to part of my take presented by Coors Light, the beer to chill, the beer of the summer, the greatest beer of all time. Today is Wednesday, July 28th, and welcome to the 2021 Takies. Welcome, guys. We just ordered a shitload of wings for the Takies. I'm telling you, this is the most magical night in show business. It really is. The SPs can go fuck off right off a cliff. They can go suck our dicks. Hey, SPs, suck my dick. Yeah, we're saying it. Suck our dicks. You know what, SPs? You piece of the shit. I think like

five people watched the SPs this year. We're going to at least double that. Yeah. I mean, the SPs, did they happen? I don't know. I don't care. The Takies, all that matters. So, it is your first Takies. This is our annual award show that we do in the summer. This year, we actually were, or usually we do it during the SP like week. It's usually the week, all-star. It's usually the week or the day after the home run derby or the day before the home run derby. Yeah, all-star game. But this year, because of the weird NBA schedule, the NBA Finals were during that week. So, we had a lot of things to talk about. So, we are doing the Takies today. We are very excited. We have 23 awards for you. I think I might even miscounted that. So, it might even

be 24. We have Blake of the Year. We have podcast listeners of the year. Blake of the Year is going to be intense, too. We came up with an idea to do Blake of the Year in a little different way. In the past, we've just called them. And whoever picks up the phone is the person who becomes Blake of the Year. There's a major wrinkle in this year's awards ceremony. We also have guest presenters. Well, the major wrinkle in this year's Blake of the Year is that we came up with a dumber idea. And it really was dumb. It's definitely dumb. But all three Blake's are in attendance. So, we have them all. We talk to all of them. Get excited for that. Should we do it? Should we hop into it? Billy, do you want to say grace?

A prayer? Maybe a pregame prayer? Yeah, say some grace for us. Take any boys. Yeah. Here we go. Before we enter this award ceremony, I would like us to all be grateful for everything that has happened in the past that we are thankful for. Do you know? Do you know what? In the great year. Do you know when there's, you know, awesome year. Do you know when there's that, like, people will use that tweet, like, someone said this and I can't stop thinking about it? Like, did it really be like that or something like that? It really do be like that sometimes. It really do be like that.

When we came across the conclusion that Billy is a stoner that doesn't smoke, like, I can't hear his voice differently. When was that? Was that last episode? Yeah, or two weeks ago? Yeah, you are high. Yeah, like, Billy's brain is high. Just your presentation, like, alright, guys. So, you look kind of different today, Billy. Yeah, what's up? What happened? Did you get a haircut? No. Say it. Say it. Say the line, Billy. Say the line that you said, all fair because it was so goddamn good. We can't start the Takies until you do it. Billy, go back to zero. Alright, alright. I'm going to say three, two,

one and then you're going to go into the scene because this is exactly what happened before we started the show. Three, two, one, scene. Billy, you look great. Did you get a haircut or something? No, I actually dyed the tips invisible. And now we can start the 2021 Takies. Just an unbelievable line. You said that and I hate you now. Yeah, it almost threw up. Yeah, it was bad. It was bad. For me to throw up because of a bad joke, you know how awful it has to be? Dude, a math teacher told me that once.

Yeah, you shouldn't repeat it. You were saying it on the nerves. I was like, no, I dyed the tips invisible. I was like, oh, I'm going to keep that one in the bank. Alright, let's do it. So, here we go. Award number one, the Hacker of the Year award. We had a presenter, did not get back to us. Okay, so we can at the end of this, we'll have PFT, I think this was yours, so you'll tell us who you were going to have present the award. So, Hacker of the Year. Hacker of the Year. The nominees are the pipeline that got hacked, which I don't even still know how that happened, but it happened. Somebody clicked on the Kansas City titties. Yeah, right. The pipeline that got hacked and

made us all pay more for our gas for like a two weeks. We were really pissed about that. Brogan Roback hacking PFT, which that was bad. That was day one stuff. Hand up. That was mostly my fault. And then the presumptive favorite, I think this actually would be off the board if we had bets on the takies. Jay Williams for being hacked after the Celtics hired a African American coach, and then Jay Williams tweeted the first head coach of color for the Celtics. And even more importantly, he is one talented individual who's paid his dues. Now, if you have even like a very, very basic knowledge of sports history, you know that

that's not in fact true. The Celtics actually had the first African American head coach in NBA history and Bill Russell, and they've had like five since Jay Williams then tweeted about six hours later as it relates to the Boston Celtics tweet that came from my account a couple of hours ago. I did not post that and my passcode has now been changed. So wait to clarify, this nominee is not Jay Williams. It's the hacker who broke into Jay Williams account. Correct. Could have been his kid, could have been an intern, could have been someone from Russia. Who knows? Still at large. All right. Drum roll. We don't do this forever. Who would have announced it? It was going to be Jay Williams. Jay Williams is on cameo. He has not responded yet. Damn.

And I was going to have Jay Williams give the award to the people that broke into the pipeline. Yes. And then it turns out oops, Jay Williams cameo account got hacked. So the winner is the hacker of Jay Williams. Congratulations. You have now won. I'm sure that person is listening right now. You have won the first take of 2021. Great award. Listen to me, you son of a bitch. We haven't forgotten about you. I still, wow, we were at the Islanders game for that moment. It was incredible. Everybody was laughing. You can't get that's that wrong as a basketball analyst. It honestly reminded me of that that Sunday night baseball game where they found out that bin Laden had just been shot and like whispers going through the crowd and people

clapping. That's what was happening at the Islanders game. But it was just people showing each other Jay Williams. I got hacked tweet. Yes. And just an all time hacking and all time fuck up on his part. We will find it just like OJ. Every day he wakes up and he looks for that killer. We're looking for Jay Williams hacker. We're coming. You son of a bitch. We're going to get it. We got Coney. You're next. I hope that he doesn't have his hacker doesn't have COVID and can't go outside. So we can't find him. But maybe he does. Yep. The second award of the night. This one is a new award in Takie's lore. It's for worst dog of the year. We love most dogs on this podcast or a few that we don't. The nominees for worst dog of the year are Doge coin. Anytime Elon Musk doesn't

tweet about it. Which that dog sucks. That dog currently sucks when Elon Musk doesn't tweet. Correct. And he hasn't tweeted about for a while. Do the tweet Elon. Do the Doge tweet. Elon please. I've lost a lot of money recently. The second nominee is Leroy for dying. The third nominee for worst dog of the year is Major Biden. And the fourth nominee for worst dog of the year is the Water Dogs La Crosse Club. I actually were so stupid that I don't even know who wins this award even though like we put this all together. But I would like to make a last minute plea for the Water Dogs La Crosse Club because they do suck even though they had a bye week. Even though they're in second place. I know what they're doing. They're just getting to a point

where we start believing in them and we get so hyped up for the playoffs only to have them stop shooting the ball and lose by a million. So I know they're they're five hundred right now. They're calling themselves like we're in first place. That's like our football team or the bears for this season. Yeah. Yeah. We're not going to listen. We're not going to apologize for winning. No. However they think we're realists about the future of the Water Dogs Club. Correct. You just gave a look of like you don't believe me. Well no. I'm just saying because Jake's announcing the game this weekend so a lot more A.W.L. will be watching if they put on a show then we're all going to get convinced they're going to win the whole thing. OK. Good point.

You know it's really the whole season for me at least on set. Well yeah. But that's because that's the one game you're going to watch. It's going to make or break for this game. You know what I'm thinking for everyone. Hakes thinks that this game is the most important as experts when it comes to motivating our players. I think we got to give it to the Water Dogs then because then this week. OK. I love it. They'll be in double revenge mode coming at us coming at Jake. Fuck you Water Dogs. You piece of shit. You were the worst dogs of the year. Who was supposed to win. I actually had Water Dogs highlight. Oh fuck. Yes. All right. Fuck you Water Dogs. And you had another swing and a miss for the presenter. OK. We don't

want this one. Say that every time. Yeah. Because we have like three. Oh no. No. He'll get back to us. Who is it. What's it. It's OK. All right. Pete. No he won't get back to us. He will. He's a piece of shit. I told him that the piece stands for piece of shit. Tweet it Pete. Everyone tweeted Pete whether he was included in this show or not. All business Pete. He is giving away free Madden codes for the rest of the summer. All right. Next up the retirement of the year award. So we had some retirements. We had some people walk away from the game. I think I did it every Sunday or Monday after NFL weekend. But the I'm not nominated. The nominees are Coach Roy Williams for his classy retirement after getting pasted by Wisconsin in the tournament. First time ever

losing in the first round. Whatever. That's not a big deal. Roy Williams classy retired. Now Roy Williams. He said that he was going to come back for another year and that he was going to take no no no no no no no no no. He's just walking away. He is just walking away. He says he's he's retiring. Yes. He means he's retiring. Correct. No. Correct. OK. We're taping this on Sunday for Wednesday. I'll just call my shot. Aaron Rodgers should have been nominated. OK. Julian Edelman has retired. Classy retirement went out with a classy thirst trap where he looked hot sitting in the 50 yard line at Gillette looked awesome. Julian Edelman is a nominee and then of course coach K which I'm going to call my shot. I'm going to say coach K is going to win it this year

and he's going to win it next year when he actually does retire because coach K has said that he's going to retire but he needs everyone to suck his dick for an entire year before he actually retires. And he could probably be talked into coming back if like his young players. Yeah. They go into this. They will. And they're like coach K we want to play one more year with you. Then he could have a dynasty of retirement. I could see it. He does a press conference. He's like John Shire came to me and said that he's just not ready to take over the team. Then they show John Shire. He's got a red dot because someone's got a sniper rifle. Yeah. His coach K's wife sitting in the rafters with a sniper rifle right at his head. We're going to do co head coaches

for a year. Yeah. Right. Just really take the training wheels and then next year I'll just do the ACC season for the games if we probably are going to win. Yeah. The ones that were favored in at home I'll take care of those. Yeah. Exactly. And maybe the following year what was the guy's name Pete Godet who took all of his losses in 1994 which has never been done before. Maybe maybe though like in four years from now coach K will just take the wins and bring back Pete and he'll do the losses. And what could also happen is like Shire takes over stinks it up for the first half of the season. Yeah. And coach K is like I'm your knight in shining armor. Sure I'll come back. Yeah. And immediately boots him out. I'll come back and I'll give a speech and

then we'll put that on my record and then he'll retire again at the end of that year. Yeah. Okay. Seriously just though just just going to throw that out there just so people remember that coach K had a medical issue one year. The Duke Blue Devils had a terrible terrible year. Coach K didn't take any of the losses. Pete Godet took the losses and then coach K like 10 years later said yeah I probably should have taken the losses but whatever. I don't know anyone at Duke that could possibly there's nothing he can do. There's out of my hands. All right. So we have a special guest to present this award. Jake hit it. Hey everyone. This is Sheldon Williams. The 2021 takey for retirement of the year is none other than the greatest basketball mind to ever walk the

planet. Yes. My coach K Shosheski. Congratulations coach. I thought he was going to say Roy Williams. Greg Popovich. Bill Jackson. His kids with Candace Parker those are just going to be the best rebounders of all time right. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. Just eating up boards. All right. So coach K congratulations coach K for winning the first of what should be a dynasty of retirements of the year. You should be the studio audience. Yeah. Clap it up because again he is eligible next year. Yeah. Because you will officially retire next year. I'll just say this it's going to be a disappointment if he doesn't win back to back. Like right now he's primed. He's prime. Yeah. Yeah. Going a nice little run here. I think Brady's pretty much the only one who could retire

over the top of him. I could also see Aaron Rodgers pull back to back to. He was this year. Yeah. But he might go back to back. Oh come out and come back. Aaron Rodgers he's so competitive. He might see that Roy or that that coach K is set up to go on like a three out of five run and fake retire a couple of times just to beat him. Yep. Okay. Make sure you put nominees that Aaron Rodgers was official nominee this year. Okay. The fourth award of the night is going to 19 year old of the year. Oh this is the fourth year in a row that I think we've had this award. Yes. Nineteen year old of the year. It was a stacked field this year. We've got Jason Tatum. Okay. Young 19. Okay. Mbappe won a World Cup choked in the Euros. He's still 19. Big choke.

And then Lil Sas. Lil Sasquatch. King of New York. The King. The one and only. People forget that he's the king of New York. He's got a great new podcast out that you guys should download and listen to. It's really good for a 19 year old son of a boy dad. The winner goes to. Hey doing all this big time Tommy. And I'm happy to announce that the boy who doesn't miss AKA Lil Sasquatch is the winner of 19 year old of the year due to his hilarious coverage of Bryce Hall and Josh Richards social life. Congratulations. Congratulations. Yes. The 19 year old of the year award. Congratulations from big time Tommy. And pardon my take. You are now the new recipient of some kind of trophy. I hope you get one. Stay old school my friend OS

for life. Take it easy. Wow. Wow. Lil Sasquatch and in no way did we just put that in and give him the award so that he would retweet this podcast. Yeah. No that definitely didn't happen. Also shout out our guy. Big time Tommy. That definitely wasn't Uncle Chaps. It was big time Tommy. Appreciate you announcing that. Thank you big time. And a great that was motivational what he said too. It was wonderful. It was poetic. Fantastic. I hope big time Tommy didn't let his dog kill his cat. Yeah. That would have. Okay. Yeah. I didn't say it. PFT said we should have nominated everyone's going to everyone snitch tags me for that snitch tag PFT should have nominated Chaps his dog is worst dog. Yeah. Yeah. Well that was two years ago. I'll double check with him.

I'll get the details. Billy you can clap. You can clap. All right. Nice. Nice. All right. Next up next up we have apology of the year. Now this was a very very tight race. This was an incredible class this year. Some great apologies. So we'll start with the apology. Now you probably didn't expect to see this guy in here but Urban Meyer did apologize this year for hiring the Iowa coach. Yes. He said so he hired Chris Doyle as strength and conditioning coach. He then fired him like I don't know two days later after the backlash and Urban Meyer said that he accepted his resignation and he said we are responsible for all aspects of our program and in retrospect should have given greater consideration to how

his appointment may have affected all involved. We wish him the best as he moves forward in his career. So Urban Meyer with a good apology for him. I feel like he's he's well on his way to earning the lifetime achievement and apologizing award. Yes. That was for him. That was a great apology. The presumptive favorite Tom Breneman with an apology after his hot mic incident which he transcribed as he said I made a comment earlier tonight that I guess went out over the air that I am deeply ashamed of. I pride myself and think of myself as a man of faith and there's a drive into deep left by Castellanos. There will be a home run and so that'll make it a 4 0 ball game. I don't know if I'll be putting on the headset again.

I just I still can't believe that happened. What a fucking moment. What a moment. His dad's on Twitter now. Oh really. Dad's on. Yeah. So Marty Breneman is on Twitter. People were speculating it was his account but he never actually claimed it. Now since he's no longer on the air he's feel he feels free to defend his son. Yeah. So he's been like replying to people being like my son's get a real bad rap for all this. Get a real bad rap. All the replies to any one of his tweets is just that copy paste and then there's a deep drive to left in a weird way. I do think he'll probably have a comeback because of how ridiculous that apology was and he probably will never know. He'll he could have a career like he could come back. He could

be 20 more years. He will always be the Nick Castellanos guy. Well it's always it's actually a good thing for him. The apology became the story. Right. No one remembers what he said when he called it. I do remember what he said. Hard F. Yes. He's got a new job by the way. Oh there you go. It's already high school sports in the Cincinnati area. Wow. And he made a joke at his introductory press conference. Wow. OK. About his own drive to the deep left. Oh got it. He's back on his feet. Cancel culture. Yeah. Damn. Another one bites the dust. Stephen A. Smith gets apology of the year nominee for his comments about Shohei Otani. He did. So Stephen A. Smith says a lot of things. But when you know that he is serious he is looks

directly into the camera. He did the serious Stephen A. Smith tone and he looked in the camera and then ESPN did like four days worth of programming off of that. So you know he's sorry. You know he's sorry. I love I love when they when someone fucks up at ESPN they're like great. Now we can just fucking sell shows for the rest of the week. And then they just put they they use the bottom line on ESPN and they run the quotes from their own employees apology like they they have a you know MLB then it scrolls to NFL News and then scrolls to Stephen A. Smith apologizes news and then runs and reacts. Yeah. Yeah. And then lastly we have Jeffrey Tubin who if you forgot was the CNN reporter who forgot to close his zoom and jerked off during a company meeting.

His his apology. I feel like people obviously remember the story but they they kind of forget how his apology went. It was something I went and looked it up. He said it was deeply moronic and indefensible. And then he went on to say I've spent the seven subsequent months miserable months in my life trying to be a better person in therapy trying to do some public service working in a food bank working on a new book. What is what is a food bank have to do with jerking off in front of your co-workers face and like going to therapy. Like I went to therapy to overcome my addiction to jacking off accidentally to not closing zooms. Yeah. Or I'm working on a new book that I'm going to make money from. What is that. I just it's so funny when people use

therapy as like this is my get out of jail free card. I did something wrong but by saying that I'm currently in therapy it's like when Riley Cooper went to go seek treatment for being racist. They seem like a 13 step program for a week and then they brought him back. They're like OK he's cured. It's all good here. If I jerked off in front of co-workers on a zoom the analogous analogous apology that I would issue if I was a Jeffrey Tubin I'd say I've worked really hard trying to do some in therapy. I'm trying to do some public service. I sold the pile for fifteen thousand dollars and I'm working on some new parlays that will definitely not lose. That would be what I would say. I just say sorry for being horny. Working on a new book. Listen sorry for partying guys.

I love too that he had seven months to be like I'm going to get in front of America and be like listen guys I'm digging deep. I'm working on a new book. I hope his books about accidentally jerking off on a zoom call. I want to I want to fucking add a wing on my Hamptons house. So I'm working on a new book. All right. Do we have specials? Oh we do. Oh OK. Went off script a little bit. Oh this is the one you prepared us for. OK. We don't know. PFT and I are going to react in the moment. Hey guys we're here. Nails coming out. Pardon my take. What's happening brothers. My boys. How are you man? What do I got next to me? A little gasoline here. I'm taking

you know what I mean. Back on point. A little pep talk here. Congrats on by the way Tom for winning the apology of the of the year. Talky takey. Good shit man. Hey wins a win you know whatever it is. OK. 2021 was a big year for apologies obviously. None more than the captivating then Tom Breneman after he well we know what he did. But I like Tom Breneman. He's a fucking gamer. He's so what I mean they have to anyways fuck that but whatever I mean this country so fucked up anyway and number three here. We I'm going to apologize for you guys for calling Kansas City the band.

There's a big drive to deep left field. OK. First of all Kansas City. Take about Xanax. Human fucking Xanax. Big Xanax coming. Same. You Xanax. But anyway pardon my take. I got you. You've always got me one way or another. OK. And Jake. Thanks for picking nails to do this cameo. Nails on. Oh man. He's he's so high that when you get to the point in your high experience where the only words that you can say are the name of the drug that you just. Oh man. Lenny. Did he have a. Is that a woman in his. He was just like yeah. Gas to smash this out little gasoline. What's the gasoline. I don't know.

I never I never heard a woman be referenced like that before. Hey. Listen. We gave nails some money there with the you know. He'll invest it wisely. Yeah. Wow. Sorry. So Tom Breneman. That was a no brainer. I don't think I don't think he really had. I mean Jeffrey Tubin was his best competition and I still think he lapped the field. It might be the best apology of all time. All time. It plays forever. The Tubin thing was a funny instance but the people will be doing and there's a deep drive to castling on us for everything forever. Yeah.

This is like going to be carved into stone one day. Yeah. This is like a year when one of like the best movie ever doesn't win. You know best Oscar or Oscar because like some other incredible movie was there. So congrats to Tom Breneman. It was really a great year in apologies. Yeah. It was really was. It was. Well the sixth award of the night is Lenny of the year. Ironically. Oh Lenny Dykstra is nominated for Lenny of the year. Outstanding performance in the field of being Lenny also nominated our playoff Lenny. Barstool Lenny and Super Bowl Lenny. Oh. And the winner is Super Bowl Lenny.

Wow. I think that when you have those three it was between Barstool Lenny and Super Bowl Lenny. Clap Billy. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on for Lenny. You won a Super Bowl Billy. Also a revelation this year just Leonard Frenett. We love him. Yeah. And he's definitely going to be back on this fall. Yeah. He's cool as shit. Very cool guy. I think he kind of hates us but also loves us. No. I think he loves us. I think he truly loves us. I think he definitely had that moment in his first interview with us where he was like oh these guys. Yeah. Okay. They're too big of clowns to actually be offensive to me. Yes. Yes. And playoff Lenny. I mean playoff Lenny got my vote

but Barstool Lenny was a Super Bowl Lenny. Super Bowl Lenny. Super Bowl Lenny trumps at all. Trumps playoff Lenny. Remember we were talking about like would you ever imagine yourself to be he went from bust to scoring a touchdown in the Super Bowl. I think we had a special prop form too in the Super Bowl. Right. Yeah. And he did have like I mean what were his he had a ridiculous playoff run. So like that was one of those nicknames when if you forget the backstory when Joe Joe Bucks said it in the 2019 playoffs playoff playoff Damien for what's his last name in Williams. He's actually on the Bears now for running with the Chiefs and we're like there's no way that's true. And then playoff Lenny became something for real and then Leonard Frenett. Awesome.

Guess he ended up with three touchdowns in the playoffs 300 yards in four games. Actually four touchdowns because he had a catching touchdown. Awesome playoffs playoff Lenny. Super Bowl Lenny. All right. Super Bowl Lenny wins that. All right. Before we get to our next one quick word from our friends at Roback. This is the Roback Award. So R H O B A C K best performance polos out there. Use code take on Roback dot com for a generous 20 percent off your first purchase through the end of this week that's spelled R H O B A C K dot com that's 20 percent off all polos Q zips hoodies and teas with code take. They just drop new performance polls that will have you feeling good and looking fresh. Roback dot com use promo code take and you get 20 percent off.

OK. Next award number seven the best load management of the year award. We have some good nominees. We have Kyrie Irving who played 54 games in a 72 game season had a couple stretches there where he just kind of disappeared didn't tell anyone where he was whether he was going to come back or not. He stepped on lucky. Yeah that's just load management. That's load management. We have Joe Biden because Joe Biden just hidden his basement for the entirety of the presidential campaign. That was fantastic load management. Great load management. It actually turned out completely opposite from Kyrie's. Yeah. Load management. Yes. Yes. But I mean he he we didn't see him for weeks and weeks and weeks. That's how you keep him fresh. Got to conserve energy at

that age. Keep him in the freezer. All right. Paul Bisson at for load management when we interviewed him about two months ago and he had done four interviews for live streams and four consecutive days. Yeah I was back to back to back to back incredible live streams incredible. And he also blogged I think. He did a podcast. He did a podcast. Somebody wrote a blog about his podcast. Yes. Yes. And then finally our formerly intern now full time Billy football for his load management for taking a month and a half off. That was great load management by Billy. He's come back better than ever. Yeah. He needed that month and a half to get his mind right to get his chickens to get his mentals. So Billy's a nominee. We do have a special guest

to present this. So let's go ahead and do that. Hey guys. It's everyone's favorite Dr. Johnny sins here to present the take the awards winner for load management of the year. As a medical professional load management is very important for a variety of reasons which is why I'm happy to present the award to Billy football. Great job Billy. You managed your load all season long. All right. Oh man Billy would you like to accept that word from everyone's favorite Dr. Johnny sins. I mean did you ever think you'd be in a world where Johnny sins is an astronaut. Yeah. And he's in the army as well. He does a lot. He's like Forrest Gump. He is a Swiss army knife of professions. But yeah that's crazy. I would actually like to thank you

guys for allowing me the to take some time off to you know get my degree and stuff and letting me come back. I really you know I like the stuff there. The stuff was everything. He got his degree but the stuff was the fun stuff. That was it. You know it's been a kind of crazy year for me. Accomplished a lot. Yeah. Won this award. What have you accomplished. Let's run it down. I came back to Barstow. Yep. I trained for a fight for Jose Canseco. Yep. And then I got my degree. Yep. And then I like moved out of my house. Oh the real world. That is a pretty big year. You got to look at the wins and like you know jot them down. I don't like what you just did there. I you said trained to fight Jose Canseco. Are we not saying that we kicked Jose Canseco's ass

anymore. We did. We did. But okay. All right. Let's let's go with that. War mode. War mode. Jose Cansecos. Have you ever gotten fired. Yeah. I haven't gotten fired. Yeah. You've actually gotten better at your job. I'm which is shocked. Yeah. Well you guys didn't actually believe me that I was like actually like doing school every day and like studying late at night. Correct. No because I saw your war zone streams every night for like seven hours. Well I had to have time off sometime. That was technically working. Billy. One more. Let's check in on how good you're doing right now. The chicken wings are here. Oh perfect. All right. So Johnny sins. Thank you for presenting that was the play him off music for Billy right here. The wings are here. All right. This is live.

Yep. Wow. We're coming downstairs. This is how important the takies are. We just got wings in the middle. Okay. Next one. PFT. That's you. Next one. This is the eighth award of the evening and it is for League of the Year. We had a lot of great leagues this year. A lot of extraordinary gentlemen. We have the Stool Streams Jenga League nominated. Oh who put that one in there. I don't know. I think that is a fan favorite right Hank. Yeah. I think I voted in. He got voted. Yeah. Yeah. Second nominee is the Kentucky Handball League. Third nominee which we heard on the our Kentucky Sports Radio where a guy called in and I don't even know if it can be considered a league but they have an Instagram page so fuck it. Well and they have a rivalry against Columbus. That's

right. That's right. Also nominated is the Kentucky or excuse me the La Crosse League. The Premier La Crosse League is nominated as that's barely a league. Barely a league. We are investors in it. Full disclosure. The last nominee is the Super League Super League. Remember that really had a moment this year. Yes. The Super League that that Monday that Sunday night. Yeah. I kind of I honestly kind of missed the idea of the Super League. Again it's bad. We understand football is a sport. Everything else is a business. But Super League would have been sick. Low key. Imagine Man City against Barcelona on a Wednesday like twice a year on a Wednesday. That's beautiful. That's just a great idea. That's a great idea. So we have we have a special

guest presenter Jake. You want to play. Hi this is Joe Castiglio to present the take the award for League of the Year and the winner is the Super League. Congratulations soccer fans. You did it. Oh that was that was Bubba's legend. Bubba got to put that in. Who's Joe Castiglione. The Red Sox announcer. That is a that that actually is a perfect voice for the League of the Year. Jake you got to like study that voice and and learn everything from it. You got it. Who's your favorite voice right now in the biz. They're all great. No. Marv Albert. Come on. Best. He's not in the biz anymore. Best. He'll be back. In the league. I don't know. There's a lot. God damn it. No Eagle. He's a good friend of mine. OK. Worst voice in the league.

I don't know. That one's easy. What's that fucking guy's name. Ciciliano. Fuck him. All right. Wait. What about Tom Brennan. Yeah. He's back in the biz unless you're OK with everything he said. Disavow. OK. All right. Next up. Great. League of the Year. The Super League. I mean it's super. It's an incredible name for a league. It really is. Someone needs to. I mean the SEC probably should just beat the Super League. Yes. That's what they've done. Yes. All right. Next up we got Alpha of the Year. This is a great category this year. We have the favorite. The not that guy guy. So put that in. You're not that guy pal. Trust me. You're not that guy. OK. Are you. Absolutely. You're going to get arrested for this.

Rested for doing what. Just like a pimple on the left. Somebody says something and you don't like it and you don't like it. Right. Is that what it is. You little pimp. Not that guy guy. I've watched the whole clip. He was ready to beat the fuck out of that guy. His posture was impeccable for an old guy. Yes. So I don't know. Like he's got some stiff competition that's here. But as a newcomer in the field of being an alpha on the Internet that's a strong showing from the not that guy guy. Yes. We have Wiley Coyote for basically winning LeBron James Space Jam to put the team on his back. He did. He scored 300 points in that third quarter. And then finally we have our beloved Jake Marsh for his best in the office speech drum roll. I

was actually supposed to get where I reached out to Mark Miller the Bill's fan. The Dallas is going down guy. He did not get back to us. So he was going to present it. But drum roll please Billy drum roll. And the winner is the best in the office. Jake Marsh. Jake Marsh please give us a speech. Really means a lot. I wouldn't have the opportunity to have this unless you guys gave me the platform. So it's a team award. It's not just about me. So are you. Wait. Are you thanking Hank for being so bad at ping pong. No. Hank's not bad at ping pong. But if you hadn't beat him then you would never gotten this award. It's true. Yeah. But did you know. I mean obviously that's probably yes. But did you know you were an alpha before that moment. Like did you.

Did you know I was just playing the game and sometimes the emotions come out of the answers alpha. Yeah. Try to win. But like that. Your career has forever changed from that moment. You are the alpha guy. We'll see. What would you say was more of an alpha move doing the I'm the best in the office. I'm the best one here. Or the step over. Actually that question is for Hank. Step over was was really more disrespectful. Really. Yeah. No I agree. Wow. That's in the office is like an initial emotions. Like you're just relieved to win the game. That happens. But the step over was just completely unnecessary. Yeah. Totally totally alpha. Yeah. That was no other word for it. No it really isn't. I was trying to help him up. A great a great

wasn't injured. A great year for our alpha of the year. Good job. Thank you. Yeah. This next award it's one that we've done every single year in part my take. Yep. With the takies. It's a very sacred award and we've got a great cast of nominees. It is the Lib of the Year Award. Lib of the Year Award. The nominees are Chris Long. He's he won it. How many times. I think Chris has won it three times. OK. To the point where when they bring out the mops at a basketball game that say Libman on them. Yeah. People always take pictures and they're like oh sure I don't know that Chris Long is at Madison Square going. He is a world famous Lib man. So Chris Long is nominated again. He's almost like the Meryl Streep. It really wouldn't be a category if it didn't

have Chris Long. It's true. The second nominee is Billy football. Oh for graduating from a liberal arts college this year. And for getting the vaccine. And for getting the vaccine. Huge Lib move. Also nominated. Such a Lib move that Billy's actually told us that we have to mention. Yep. That he got the vaccine because he doesn't want people to think he's anti. He got Johnson and Johnson. Yeah. Also nominated is Cole Beasley. Cole Beasley nominated for Lib of the Year Award for refusing to take the Trump vaccine. Also nominated Dan Woken. Just an outstanding year in the field of liberalism. He still thinks we shouldn't be playing sports. Yeah. No he thinks that he doesn't think that sports should ever exist. He thinks that balls every ball should be

deflated in America until such time that Dan Woken personally proves of it. And then Dr. Anthony Fauci nominated for Lib of the Year. Created coronavirus. He invented it in a lab. Yes. He's actually from Wuhan. And if you don't get to listen to the whole show it's probably because the rest of it was taken down after this. We cannot. We can definitely not put this up as a clip on Twitter or Instagram. Yeah. All right. Do we have. We do not have a guess. Wait Jake. I think Jake has. Where'd he go. Where'd he go. He got the alpha just he won alpha the year and he walked right out. He wouldn't say a word. He went to go eat Billy's chicken. What the fuck. Wait. What was that. Seriously that was the most alpha thing he's ever done. All right. I'll do an

ad real quick before we get to. Yeah. Everyone wants to know who won the year. That's insane that he just did that to us. All right. By the time Jake gets back hopefully we will have the answer to Lib of the Year. Go right now though to 3C.com 3CHI.com shop for Delta 8 Vapes gummies, tinctures and oils that can be used to make homemade edibles. Use code pardon at checkout to receive 5% off your order. 3C is an industry leader in Delta 8 THC products. All products are formulated by a biochemist and made in the U.S. with USA grown hemp. 3C Delta 8 is a federally legal version of THC and it is more functional alternative to marijuana. It gives an amazing buzz and a great body feel but with a clearer head and less

anxiety and paranoia it's available online at 3C.com and it retailers around the country. Again go to 3C.com the number 3CHI.com shop for Delta 8 Vapes gummies, tinctures and oils that can be used to make homemade edibles. Use code pardon at checkout to receive 5% off your order. Okay Jake is back. We stopped the show for you. You won the Alpha of the Year then you just walked off. That was unnecessary for us to stop for me. Well we we didn't know if we had a presenting. No I timed it perfectly. Oh okay. Yeah. For what? Not having anyone? To make sure there were no pauses for the presenters. Got it. Yeah. So no presenter for Alpha of the Year. No. What did you do? Huh? What do you mean? You were we did Alpha. Next to Lyb. Oh sorry Lyb.

Sorry Lyb of the Year. My bad my bad. God I got I kept saying Alpha Alpha Alpha because you walked up you stood up you won an award you stood up and you left and then he came back and told us that he timed everything perfectly. That was a Jedi mind trick. He was like I don't know where I am. No everything was perfect. Yeah I just did. We actually had a decline request. That's right Lyb of the Year was declined by a ass gun girl. Katelyn Pennett to do Lyb of the Year. She declined. I then I think I just said get a Trump impersonator. So we don't have Lyb of the Year but who won Lyb of the Year Jake? I forget who even won Lyb of the Year. Congratulations to... Billy. Billy won Lyb of the Year. Billy's cleaning up. Billy's cleaning up. Incredible.

Billy Lyb of the Year. That's right I forgot you won this so you got so you graduated college liberal arts school and you got the vaccine. Yeah so basically oh and you quit a job. Yeah I didn't quit a job. Yeah you did for a little bit for like a month and a half. Yeah thank you for the opportunity to be liberal in the original sense of the word. Yes yes freedom. Okay so what do you accept your award Lyb guy? Do I have... Can I not accept it? No you have to accept it. Actually that would make him super liberal. Well I think I won't accept this award until everyone who's had a hardship in life gets an award. I shared the award with Chris Long last year so what I might do is I might give him this one. Okay nice I like that. That's great. Also this year you beat up

a Cuban person who hates Castro. Wait is that why you block Chris Long because you were like trying to beat him in Lyb of the Year competition? I never blocked Chris Long. Oh I forgot you did that. You got so triggered online another liberal thing. Yeah he made a safe space. Yeah that you had to make a safe space so that your snowflake wouldn't keep melting. Also wasn't it the Lyb Cuck of the Year when we originally made it? It might have been the Lyb Cuck of the Year but I think Cuck of the Year is actually a different category from from Lyb of the Year. Separated it. Yeah yeah not all libs are wait not not all cucks are libs but all libs are cucks. Yeah yeah so good job good job Billy congratulations. Proud of you. When we did when we sponsored AOC

as our first NIL athlete Billy was like oh my god dream come true. Goals. That's what he said. She said on the texture. He was like can I drink her bath water? Girl boss. All right. You should have done girl boss of the year. Oh fuck. Billy you won that one too. No Hank won that one. I think I now have the most takies of anyone. You're cleaning up today. You're cleaning up today. All right next up PFT right. No it's me I'm all lost. I can't stress this enough. Jake just out with my brain so hard by getting up and just changing everything. I still don't know what he was doing. I don't either. Incredible. Did you have to poop Jake? No I had to pee really badly. All right thirst trap of the year. Big award. A lot of people up there for

thirst trap of the year. We'll start with us. Everyone in this room we get thirst trap of the year for the post of us playing dimmy at Stu finders pool. I think women are still masturbating to that today. Next up we have Jeffrey Tubin. It might not it must not be that good of a picture if they're still masturbating. Yeah that's true. They're still trying to get off. They just keep looking at my fucking belly that's just overlapping like just my belly looks like it's choking my bathing suit. Listen I think we all look good. We look like real men should look. Yeah that's right. Not like these fancy guys that work out and eat correctly. This is what real guys look like. Yes perfect body. All right we have Ryan Rosillo for the jumper that doesn't make any sense

where he's floating in the air getting his shots up. Big cat he was unloading some pictures from his camera. That's true. That's a photo dump for people in the world. Jeffrey Tubin is nominated. We already talked about him but his thirst trap where he's masturbated on a zoom call and then our good friend Paul Rable for giving the game ball after a win which doesn't happen often. There's a little PLL joke for people out there. They aren't the cannons the worst team in the league. Last place for their lives. Colorado Springs. Yep. Yep. Giving away the game ball in his underwear. Well everyone else had their shorts on and most had shirts on. It was very uncomfortable to watch. I don't I didn't write down who won this so let's

decide it right now. I mean I think it's got to go to Paul Rable. Who's the most likely to retweet it. Paul Rable. No it might not. Yeah well Paul Rable if he wins it might not be brand friendly enough. Oh should we give a should we give a tie. A tie to Rosillo and Rable and you know what first to retweet wins the picture of themselves. Yeah. Yeah. Okay so we'll do a quote card with Paul Rable and Ryan Rosillo and it will say in fine print first to retweet gets the actual. Yeah I like that. Okay so Thirstrapper the year award is still to be determined. It's just shocking that Julian Edelman was not nominated. I know he put a shirt on. Yeah. Yes. He retired from having topless pictures. This is taking history folks. We just didn't give an award away and instead we're making

it a competition. I think we kind of did because only the true Thirstrapper of the year would want more people to see that original Thirstrapper. Yeah that's true that's true. Okay good good award. The 12th award of the evening is going to the category of premature celebration. A lot of good nominees this year. The first nominee is every Steelers fan when they were 11-0. Maybe the worst 11-0 team in any sport of all time. Yes. But they were sure letting us know about it at that point. Also nominated is Ryan Rosillo for adopting Chris Paul and making Chris Paul his son in what the second round of the playoffs just before Chris Paul fell off the face of the earth. It was after it was today's credit it was after they won the Western Conference final

but and I'll give him a little bit of credit that he's he has thrown out there that he thinks game four of the finals will probably hurt him more than it hurts Chris Paul like mentally. So he's at least taking some ownership but yeah that was he was looking for his victory lap on Chris Paul. I think Chris Paul cares more than everyone else. Now will Ryan accept in game four. Will Ryan change his tune when it eventually comes out that Chris Paul was dealing with like a wrist injury. Is it nice. He's gonna be like I was right about Chris Paul but I didn't know he was hurt. Yeah we will see. Yeah so the the winner of premature celebration of the year goes to the Sons and Four guys. Oh man because he had a moment. Yeah thank you Billy. Yes he had a moment. He became a

public figure and as quickly as he came on the scene he left and he came on the scene with like in a ball of fury. Yes. He announced his presence by beating up that nuggets guy and it's over and it's over. It's over. It's over. It's nice guy. We had him on the show. We did a t-shirt with him. Wishing the best of luck. Sons and Four is over. It's not it's it's never coming back. So it was not it. What a whirlwind. He had a moment. He'll always you know what he'll always be able to be like hey I'm the Sons and Four guy. Credit to Sons and Four guy as well because I saw on his Instagram when the Sons were down three two he was playing chess while everyone else was playing checkers. He was doing some charity work giving meals to homeless before they actually got lost the NBA

finals. He was getting ahead of it so I appreciate the you know ability to see the whole court. And if you go back long enough in his history especially on Instagram you can see he's going to be just fine. He's like a big outdoors guy probably didn't watch too many live sports. He's looked like he hung out on big rocks and was hiking a lot. So I think he's got a good mindset to move on. Yes. All right. So great award. Great award to Sons and Four guy. He will definitely retweet this. Absolutely. He's got nothing else left. All right. Next up we have the Bonk of the Year award big year in Bonks. The nominees Jeffrey Tubin is still nominated. He's is he not going to win an award. This is going to be sad if he goes home. Always bridesmaid never a bride. He's being nominated

for everything. PFT is nominated. PFT had an especially horny year. I think it started with the Miley Cyrus and it kind of was like a four week four month stretch where it's like hey dude just jerk off snowball from there. I don't jack off when you age when you age negative eight years you get a new sense of that's true energy and horniness. It was like Frank Thomas's testosterone pills. Yeah. I felt I felt like I was back in my mid 20s again. Yeah. Just the ladies don't complain either. All roads lead back to a sex joke. That's OK. All right. And then lastly Darren Ravel for his search for a random woman that he knew from what it was like a country club. So here's the quote. Yeah. I was three. I always loved girls. Never thought they were disgusted.

This was my friend Leslie at Woodmont Country Club in Tamarick Florida. I need help finding her to catch up guessing she's 45 now. Well guess what. The Bonk of the Year award goes to let's have a we have someone introducing it. OK. Hey this is part of my take. This is booked by Jake Marsh and it's about Darren and I'll tell you I'm by the way I'm buddy and Jimmy's dad Jim Bayhine. That's kind of wild although they're starting to make money more money than I'm making. Well let's hope not. But I'm here anyway to present how what I'm presenting the award for Bonk of the Year. That's interesting. So the one and only Darren Ravel and I hope you find Leslie. Now that's quite a that's quite a different thing there. I don't know what exactly that all means

but I want you to try to do whatever they say and hopefully you're a good fan of ours and we're going to have a great year. We had a good finish to last year. We've replaced some forwards six seven six five forwards with two six three six nine forwards so we're bigger. Got the guards back. We got Jesse at center starting to really get there and of course Brown is back. So got a good team should be fun. A lot of guys who can shoot and we'll see how it goes. But this is from Jake and hopefully Darren things are good for you. Oh my god. All roads lead back to what his basketball team looks like. That was incredible. Who got that one. I got that one. OK. That was incredible. Holy shit. Jim Bayhine first saying the it's wild then just being so confused on why he

was what Bonk meant. What Darren Ravel looking for. What was the exact quote. Like oh that's kind of weird. So. And then just giving us the entire scouting report is Syracuse Orange. I love that though. That's a basketball mind right there. He already all roads do lead back to like him diagnosing. OK. What are some things that we've upgraded in the zone. Yes. Yes. I was three. I always loved girls. Never thought they were disgusting. What a fucking weirdo. Leslie from the pool. Leslie from the pool. I hope Leslie found out that Darren was trying to find her because she should have taken some protective measures at that point. Yes. Like restraining order. And listen I I don't know what state he he was in when he tweeted that but it was horny

because you can't be like this chick I knew I want to find out about her and maybe see her Instagram. For all the shit that I get for for making horny jokes sometimes Ravel is actually the king of commenting eyeballs. Yes. On an actual horny picture. Yes. Sometimes of like an 18 year old girl. Yes. All the time. Ravel Spank Bank is just any girl that's ever laughed at any of his jokes. And then the Jim Kramer show and then Jim Kramer show. Yes. Jim Bayheim. What a fucking legend. Great. Is that only at the Takies. Only at the Takies. Now we know Buddy and Jim Junior Jimmy Junior are our fans of this show. So I won't say no. And the next. No. I wasn't going to say what you thought I should invite them as

the athlete. Yes. They should actually be on the show. We should have them which you interview them. I was actually going to say is it a bad sign for Syracuse that that he's on cameo. Coach is not on cameo. I don't know. We know we'll move on. You know what I think it is because he did allude to this. He goes Buddy and Jimmy are going to be making more money than I will sometimes hope not. He's already he's thinking the name like this. He's like wait a second. I can get a cut of this NIL thing. OK. Go to Syracuse because then you can do that. There we go. Yeah. That's the good spin zone. OK. You want to do an ad before we do the next one. Yeah. Before we get into the next takey award I want to talk to you guys about cross country mortgage

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those commercials actually. I would love to see Paul missed the net back on my TV every fucking five seconds during hockey. The second nominee is the Montreal Canadians for Canadian of the year. They put together a nice little run in the playoffs. They did almost took home the cup and then the third nominee for Canadian of the year is Lou Dort. Lou Dort the Dortmeister. The winner is it's Lou Dort. Yes. Lou Dort won his first take of the year. The first really first minute door to the torture chamber. Give it up Billy. Yeah. I fucking love Lou Billy. You give it. I want you to give an acceptance speech on behalf of Lou Dort. Thank you for accepting the award. Wait. No. Okay. No he got it. You crush that. All right.

Next up we got worse take of the year. Worst take of the year. So worst take of the year we have a few very good nominees. We'll start with Nick Young in September 2020 said Greek freak Greek freak gone ain't nobody raising no family in Milwaukee. This was obviously after they got bounced from the playoffs. Everyone said oh you know Yanis is going to demand a trade. That didn't work out so well. The next nominee is Barstool Sports for tweeting a picture of Tom Brady 9 13 September 13 2020 saying I've made a terrible mistake. What happened. The Bucks went and won the Super Bowl. Wasn't really a mistake. I have finally been nominated for an award for my diagnosis of Drew Brees shoulder injury and then he went on to have every single one of his ribs broken

just to run up the score. I think it was 14 ribs. It was 35 ribs. Yeah. He just broke another one. It was an impressive amount of ribs. More I learned more about anatomy in Drew Brees having his ribs break every other day than I did in any class I ever took. Next one is Lewis Riddick predicts an absolutely fantastic monstrous year for Dwayne Haskins in 2020. I guess it was monstrous. It was in a way. It was. And it was fantastic at times. It was. I mean it was fantastic for us. Yeah. It was fantastic for us. And if that didn't happen then he would not have been benched and then the Washington football team would not have won the NFC beast. Yeah. That's true. So great job. There we go. Butterfly effect. And then last up we had Emmanuel Acho for his take about what was it. What was the

Sha'Kari Richardson. Sha'Kari Richardson obviously didn't get to the Olympics because of a weed test and a manual Acho in all earnest like this is exactly how he thinks. I thought that he was punking us. I thought he was trolling us tweeted legalizing weed and track and field competition is all good. If you're running in a straight line legalizing weed and track and field competition is terribly dangerous. If you throw the javelin where do we draw the line. We draw the line on people who've never smoked weed trying to talk about it or I guess haven't hung around anyone that smoked weed. Yes. Yes. Yes. He's like never been in a room as Billy. No. Just listen to this show once. All right. Winner is I also didn't write down a winner for this. This is great. I think

it's a manual Acho. I think it's got to be a manual Acho. Yeah. This is actually great because we're now doing the takies and voting on the takies for the people to see. I mean who else could it be. It has to be. It has to be. It has to be. It might be recency bias but guess what. We smoke weed. We have a short term memory. So we know the manual Acho. Exactly. Exactly. Shout out to old tech exposed. Yes. Old tech exposed for helping us out. He always helps us out every year with the takies. We appreciate him even though actually I think I've beaten him because he gets all my tweets get tagged in it and he's just like well he's joking and half the time I'm being serious. So I think I've beaten old takes exposed. We've blurred the line enough. Yeah.

Right. Where it's like I don't know if this I'm going to get roasted for an old takes if I try to old takes big cat on this. Right. He's he every single time it's just like oh that's just big cat making a joke or trying to jinx one of his bets which actually is a good bet by him. But yeah I've beaten him. The 16th award of this year's takies is for trend of the year. Trend of the year. A lot of hot trends this year a lot of stuff that we're keeping our eyes on as a podcast staying on the bleeding edge of all the stuff the the kids are doing and saying and wearing we're probably the hippest podcast in the world so the nominees for trend of the year are cap saying that's cap brought to you by it went away for a little bit but then cap came back with

a vengeance this year. Short shorts is nominated yeah trend of the year five inch in seems right Hank fuck those also short shorts on girls where they wear the t-shirt that just way oversized covers everything up. I wish I could do that. I think those the the shorts that say just like cheer across the back yeah I think those are coming back yeah that's my I'm shooting my shot for next year. Also not well no I've been saying that for the last like five years yeah I'm just saying I've always thought whatever you saw that yeah that it's horny yeah I just like reading Hank. Yeah you're just like I you know what I want to see I want to see a bunch of chicks where something on their ass that I can read. I like words yeah they should put someone says on to me I can

back I know I was just reading yeah they should put novels on the back it's the bonky everyone gets everyone gets smarter. Also nominate for trend of the year getting vaccinated getting vaccinated and then shut up Billy and then not posting about it on social media. Yep also shut up Billy. Another trend of the year that's nominated this year is being Chuggy. Chuggy took the world by storm this year when some chick made a tick talk about it and then another chick wrote about it in the New York Times. Yep and then now now it's massive and everyone's saying it yes so the winner of trend of the year is being Chuggy. No that's cap that's cap that's cap what I just capped holy it's not it's not Chuggy it's being it's capping cap is the trend of the year no cap all right

what a twist congratulations unbelievable run for cap you will get to victory listen cap you brought it across the finish line came back big time and I think did I start bringing cap back because you guys were accusing me being horny no you just brought it back because I think you well you didn't bring it back you you tried yeah you discovered it and then you tried to be like you played it off as like no I knew and then you tried to bring it back no you beat us down with it now it's back no I did know that it was a thing and then we stopped talking about it and then cap came back I'm trying I was in the middle of spin zoning against something else which is why I brought cap back but I'm I'm having a hard time I think you I think I was being horny it might have been I mean

might have yeah I mean there's it's either horny or being cap those are the two states of pft all right next up we have Monday reading of the year the Monday reading of the year the nominees are we have the waffle house reading the waffle house fight reading we have the chuggy article that pft just mentioned from New York Times we have the disney immersion Monday reading and guess what you know what we're gonna do we're gonna put it in the show we're gonna put the Monday reading the winner in the show so here it is so we have this post uh called my boyfriend keeps getting into fights with a cook at waffle house here's how it starts I know this sounds really weird but here it is my boyfriend and I have been together for three years we met and started dating when we were

both in graduate school that's actually a good note to have their they advanced past bachelor's degree but I dropped out to go back to college I dropped out to go back to college to pursue a different career we are both finished now and live together making a fairly nice combined income our income is relevant because we could afford to eat somewhere nice when we're out and about but he always wants breakfast breakfast food okay real quick first of all uh let's not shame people that eat at waffle house because no if you're a millionaire you should still be going to waffle house on a regular basis it is the best night food it's the best breakfast drunk food it's great waffle house drunk waffle house is one of america's finest institutions um he's she goes on

to say when he was a child his dad couldn't stand eating breakfast type food in the afternoon or evening so his mom would make him waffles slash pancakes eggs and bacon in the evening whenever his dad was busy or out of town it's a wonderful and safe memory for him and when he goes to his happy place he says that's where he always goes I like this memory because it's basically the grown up version of when you're eight years old you say when I'm an adult I'm gonna eat candy for dinner and then I spoiler alert I actually have done that many times it is kind of a weird move though for a dad to say we don't eat breakfast food at dinner time he's just a rules guy that's that's kind of bizarre to me I don't like that I one time I was at a grocery store there's a person

that was behind me in line I was buying stuff to make breakfast for dinner and the guy was like are you making are you making breakfast I was like yeah he goes my wife won't let me eat breakfast for dinner damn I felt so bad for the guy that is really sad all right my boyfriend is an incredibly nice and caring person he's I love these these long diatribes where they just try to set up like no guys he's actually totally normal and then drop the hammer like my boyfriend is the sweetest nicest person ever occasionally he likes to fuck his mom in front of me but I love him otherwise I'm in the best relationship in my life my boyfriend sometimes likes to bring guns out in the bedroom yes but I figure we've all got our kinks my boyfriend is so in tune with my feelings

but every now and then he fakes like he's gonna push me in front of oncoming traffic I'm afraid he's gonna kill me listen I've got such a great boyfriend we're in the best relationship of all time it's something I could only have dreamt about when I was a little girl he owns this island called Little St. James and he goes there a lot with some of his friends he makes good money so we're doing pretty well we have a beautiful house in Manhattan okay so back to the story he loves animals in his kind this is really she's doing the checklist of like he's not a sociopath he loves animals and is kind and gentle with every bug bird and pet that he comes across dude you don't have to be gentle with every bug yeah with a bug like a spider I'm gonna smash that spider

I'm murder hornet gonna fuck it up uh he's almost always willing to turn the other cheek in social situations where somebody tries to insult him or get aggressive towards him and usually winds up diffusing the situation having a productive discussion about whatever the issue was except at Waffle House by the way at last point you don't get points for being an adult that doesn't get into fights it sounds like he doesn't get into fights a lot right like this is a common occurrence for him where he should get into a fight where most people get into a fight that he calmly talks his way out unfortunately that's not like you don't get to walk around like a boy scout with being like see this badge someone took my parking spot at Whole Foods I didn't fight him

that's not how it works my boyfriend fights using logic and reason he likes to use his words and diffuse everything okay uh anytime we're out he wants to go to the same goddamn Waffle House and get breakfast food I'm not a big eater so I used to not really care I would just drink coffee and read my book well he enjoyed his food which is a awesome visual just like honey let me get my happy place uh but that became impossible once he and this one cook started chirping at each other every time we went there boyfriend complained about his eggs one time because he likes them a little runny and they were served hard the cook responded by giving him scrambled eggs that's hilarious when he brought it up again the cook served him two hard boiled eggs funny been funny

very funny I think it was just part of the cook shtick which who doesn't know a cook with a shtick you gotta have one if you're a short order cook that's you know what that's a feature not a bug for that Waffle House because that's the funny cook that fucks up your order and tells you if you go to Waffle House and you expect to have your order 100 correct every single time you my friend are not understanding the true charm of going to Waffle House it's like I want breakfast food they serve you a breakfast food and then you kind of yes it's kind of maybe uh the cook responded by giving him scrambled eggs when he brought it up again the cook served him two hard boiled eggs I think it was just part of the cook shtick and it was kind of funny to be honest but

my boyfriend wasn't able to laugh it off when we left he was in kind of a bad mood but we didn't really talk about it the next week we're out getting some shopping done and he wanted to go to Waffle House again I suggested that we try out a different place or at least a different Waffle House location but he only wanted the same Waffle House which if you've been in the south there's a Waffle House every other block and they look identical on the exact that's it that's the entire point of Waffle it's just a food station it's like being like I want to go to this McDonald's and not that McDonald's um we went in and sat down and once again the same cook served his eggs wrong my boyfriend sort of snapped at him that he wasn't interested in messing around

and just wanted the correct eggs the cook then served him a piece of toast with a hole cut out in the middle with a fried egg in it that sounds delicious by the way toad in the hole yeah my boyfriend got really mad and threw the egg toast at the cook which made the cook come around from behind the bar and throw it back at him they ended up sort of wrestling fighting until my boyfriend was like this is bullshit and walked out nobody got hurt but the few other people in there were watching and laughing a bit well here's the thing you don't want to get into it with a Waffle House cook because Waffle House cooks know how to handle themselves most of their clientele is drunk they're belligerent it's late at night you have to be able to fight if you're going to be

it's like the most dangerous the most uh i would say the most aggressive uh like self-defense capable jobs in america i would put Waffle House right up there with like black water employees someone someone replied the first reply to this uh tweet was i went to a job interview for Waffle House and one of the questions was can you fight yeah it has to be i mean have you been to a Waffle House at two o'clock in the morning can you handle yourself you have to you remember that story in the news like a year ago about a Waffle House cook that took somebody's ak-47 away from him or they disarmed a dude with an ar-15 very dangerous that's day one training if you're a Waffle House cook um all right so back to the story this is the crazy part my boyfriend keeps going back and ordering eggs

and getting into fist fights with the same cook it's almost a ritual at this point my boyfriend orders runny eggs the cook serves him some other version of eggs and then they beat the shit out of each other i quit going with him after the second fight but he kept going by himself they're like peter and the giant chicken from family guy it's the weirdest thing they physically fought like six or seven times over this i think they're actually friends yeah oh they are this is just guys horsing around yes this has become a friendship they were if they weren't actually friends he would not be allowed inside the Waffle House anymore if you get into a fight i'm not going to say if you get into a fight at a Waffle House you're never welcome back because

they would have no clients if you get into a fight with the same person more than four times in a Waffle House then at some point they'll be like hey can you just come back when he's not working this is sport they're like they basically they probably text each other beforehand you're like you want a brawl today uh want to go yeah you want to go buddy i've tried to talk to him about it a few times but he keeps saying it's a matter of principle i've told him to talk to the manager or something like that but he just waves me off apparently the cook hasn't yet made him the correct runny eggs but it's like he spends the week learning new ways of preparing eggs to piss my boyfriend off i think he does exactly that i'm on team cook here i want to get out in front of that

he's your team oh i'm on team both their sides because he's right it is a matter of principle but asking for an egg that's a little bit runny that's a tough egg to make not for a cook but for anyone i know you could do it if you're a cook at a crowded waffle house and you've got a million orders going on making the perfectly runny egg is a difficult task so i don't think this is crowded i think this is the middle of the day when waffle house has no one if that's in fact correct if this guy is going for a casual lunch at waffle house well using from clues here it's got to be a lunch or dinner and they were one day going out shopping and then they went to waffle house i think it's just middle of the day they're just fighting waffle out yeah i i don't know i don't know about that

you either go to a waffle house at night for dinner or you go early in the morning for like a late just a meal that you have at waffle house you call it a waffle house it's not called breakfast lunch or dinner he said she she said he does lunch and dinner there um all right so then it finishes up the thing is we're getting married this summer he's accepted a job at a new city and it'll be easy for me to find work after the wedding so we'll be moving away from his sworn enemy waffle house guy he hasn't really been out since quarantine started but it wouldn't surprise me if that's the first place he goes when restaurants open back up for sitting customers but my main worry is this strange vindictive side of him i've never seen before that leads him to fight

the same guy every week the violence itself is an issue for me but the obsession over it almost bothers me more should i be worried that this side of him will come up later in our marriage how do i get him to open up about this is this type of obsession a choice or is it indicative indicative of something deeper you need to cook him eggs and you need to cook him the perfect runny egg and see if he has any desire to stop going to that waffle house because if he decides to stop going then it was about the eggs this whole time if he keeps going back it's just because they're bros and he misses the human body craves contact right so he likes getting to a fight every now and again i honestly don't i think this guy is actually the most well adjusted adult

i've ever heard because he seems like a great guy but having a grudge or a point of principle that you will not let up it's like a bulldog with a tennis ball in his mouth sometimes guys just have to do that like sometimes you just have to beef silently or actually physically fight like i'm thinking about i have i have this guy who lives in my building who on july 4th i was using the grill the community grill and he came up and he moved my stakes over and put his own food on there without asking me i scowl at that motherfucker every time i see him i haven't said anything but i have a grudge and i fucking hate him i think and if i ever get in a point where like he lost his keys and i have a chance to let him in i won't let him in it's a passive grudge

but having a grudge and having a foe that you wake up in the morning you're like fuck that guy it's healthy a grudge not so much a foe is very important a rival right it's important for guys to have rivals you are rivals against grill guy i'm rivals with dk metcalf hanks rivals with the english language and i guess chocolate milk somehow boners boners hanks right we were rivals but oh good point hank actually declared he and his in pft's rivalry over because pft can't beat him which well i beat him literally 15 minutes going but my i figured you out you can't my defense is too good my defense is too good you still can't get an interaction wow that's not true okay so that rivalry is over but yes having a rival you see that i mean we're watching we're watching the last

dance right now mj just has rivals like fake real doesn't matter uh having something to drive you every single day is healthy i do think that waffle houses are great places to get in fights yeah it seems like everyone is you know everyone that's at a waffle house is is ready that there might be a fight at any given time it's like a ufc crowd all the tables are have rounded corners on them so if you fall you're probably not going to split your head open it's like chess boxing so i'm with this guy i think he's totally i think he's a wellage i mean maybe the actual fist fighting as an adult is a little much but it actually doesn't sound like they're fist fighting they're more wrestling which is that's just kind of you're basically doing it's gentlemen's fighting

no-face stuff right everyone's home for dinner right no stay away from the groin no fish okay say anything to their boss like what happened to your face you're just trying to you're just trying to wrestle each other in and like feats of strength do you think that there's an outside chance that this guy has a pre-existing relationship with the waffle house cook in a way that he told him hey i'm gonna fuck with my fiance let's get into a fight and have a rivalry every time i come to your restaurant and then he just never told his fiance he's like pulling a big prank on her well it could that that theory could make sense if he was like i love my happy place but what really bothers me is my fiance demands coming so he found a way to go to his happy place

whereas fiance refuses to go you know what happened they go in there the first time and he's like this is as you say my happy place for me that would be a place like buffalo wildlings you go there you sit down you're guaranteed a good time she comes along what does she do the first thing when they sit down she opens up a book she doesn't even try to enjoy waffle house disrespect and so he's like you know what i'm going to get into a fight with this guy until she leaves and demands to stop coming because i listen i'm gonna get my brain smothered covered and what is it chunk diced in front of her if that's what it takes to make her stop reading a book at a waffle house yeah he pays he pays this guy off he tips him extra to be like hey let's just make sure that i can come here

and he's probably getting the the best eggs every single time he probably eats his runny eggs that are perfectly cooked and then he and then he says what's up to his cook friend and he's like hey can you just uh maybe give me a noogie and and give me one solid like punch in the liver so that i can go home with a couple scratches yeah i mean i i love this relationship i love everything about it i love this guy i really do think that having a point of principle having something that you like one of those standoffs that you're like you know what today i'm not going to give up i'm not going to let someone push me around when was the last time you got into a fight fist fight well just like a fight grappling fist that sort of thing December 15th December 15th uh not since college

i don't think i'm trying to think i don't think since college what about you hank summer well besides that outside of a sanctioned event probably college yeah college college i got into a fight in hong kong but it was like kind of a bro fight because the guy was wearing the same outfit that i was he was shirtless also wearing the same color shorts i was and we just looked at each other and you knew it was on and then afterwards we were friends and we were there's no better feeling in the world that's not a fight than getting into a fight with somebody and then afterwards like in the middle of the fight you realize that you and i are more similar than we are different was this when you were high on ecstasy this was when i was high on mdma yes yeah

okay so you might have just been kissing the dude rolling balls you might have just been groping his feet no because it's on camera okay so confirmed not kissing confirmed fight though confirmed ras it was a rassel yeah um also isn't that like what isn't that like saying hello at a rugby game pretty much yeah just not not a threat yeah just a couple rugby guys yeah yeah um all right so this guy yeah waffle house guy love him i fucking love him the 18th award of the 2021 takies is for the award of the year very special category wow first time award a brand new award in the takey rundown here uh the first nominee is the nvp award the nicolodian valuable player went to michael trabisky in that playoff game that we all remember with a slime yes what a time that

was what a time what a time what a game you might be the one and only winner of the nvp award i yeah it would be incredible if it were the if we're that were the case there's definitely a conversation happening at nicolodian right now like i we can't do the nvp again because those shitheads at part of my take will just ruin it yes and we will we will absolutely we absolutely will we'll try to get Mitch to win it again the uh second nominee for award of the year is the award of the year award oh wow little meta in the first time it's been first time nominee and the first time that it's been awarded crazy taking the world by storm uh the next nominee is tom verducci for having a hall of fame vote and sucking his own dick and making that giant video about how great it was and how

seriously he took his uh his job as being a hall of fame nominee and a hall of fame voter and then the last award of the year is genzaga for making the first final four of all time they finally achieved that great award of making mark fused first final four incredible accomplishment huge hump huge hump for the program the winner of award of the year goes to tom verducci for having a hall of fame vote and sucking his own dick congrats tom let's play that video yep great and in those sweet moments when the one half of the one percent gather as one seated above all others that's when you truly understand the weight of what you hold in your hands unbelievable i still can't believe this made it out if it if aliens come down to earth and they're

like sirs what is a baseball writer yeah i'm going to play that video for them i think actually the only thing that tom verducci could use is as an explanation here is that during covid maybe he was working from home maybe there weren't like people around him to be like hey this is a really bad idea you look like a tremendous douchebag uh but even still someone had to edit it i someone saw it before it came out i think there's a chance that tom verducci was just like i'm going to learn new skills during covid and part of those skills were i'm going to get final cut pro i'm going to get a brand new camera i'm going to get a lighting rig yep i'm going to get uh like essentially one of those slr cameras and so he got really into filmmaking for a couple months like bo bernum

yes do it all himself yeah and this this was the output yes um all right next up we have a few awards left and we're going to do Blake of the year at the end here coming up all three blakes in attendance uh this award is ratio of the year award if you aren't on twitter you don't know what it is ratio is when someone tweets something very little retweets and likes and a lot of responses meaning they probably said something crazy the nominees are uh kevin durant in reply to someone talking about five years ago today kevin durant announced his decision to join the warriors kevin durant said this shit a holiday now 798 replies uh the second nominee kevin durant when uh someone said to him relax big dog you're kevin durant life is too sweet and he replied there's no

relax champ no relax when i'm on twitter i'm on 10 until the second i close the app you relax i love that tweet so much great tweet might be my favorite tweet of all time uh the next nominee is kevin durant for his reply to read laments who said those of us who are lucky to count jackie as a friend are the better for it you should try it when kevin was talking about jackie mccullum and kevin durant said congrats my g enjoy that which is an all-time reply to this someone just saying i'm friends with this woman enjoy being friends with jackie but enjoy that and then uh finally we have kevin durant uh in his reply to uh nick right nick right said no doubt what talking about uh kevin durant kevin right was saying i think he was talking about ad being a switchable defender

and a rim protector elite elite apple too nick right said no doubt those are all fair points these are tiny bits we were picking the more fun thing to do is an actual 12 player draft alternating picks i'm waiting on a flight and have time if your game you can have the first pick and he just responded i'm good that's so good god damn it kd is so fucking good i love oh and oh i have one last one actually this one's a winner i'm gonna call this one the winner because it actually has the most responses it has 2000 responses uh when shannon sharp talked about kevin durant saying he was misquoting kevin durant saying winning championships not the end all be all when i why i play the game kevin durant quote tweeted and said you all drunk uncle out here

lying again when did i say this he had 2000 responses to that kevin durant you are the ratio quink king in a good way though too because they all get incredible interactions anytime he hops on twitter and tweets i'm just i get depressed sometimes big cat thinking about all the great tweets that kevin durant has put out there that we'll never see because they came from burner accounts yes i want kevin like when he retires he should go back and publish an anthology of all his burner account tweets yes and i mean i would sit down and read every single one of them yes absolutely the greatest writer of our day and age also the ratios are really hard to find because anyone who ever gets ratio deletes it yeah immediately p words yeah yeah not kevin durant

okay next up billy oh yeah good job billy all right up next we have the award for the worst prediction of the year there are a lot of really shitty predictions this year so it was tough to narrow these down again shout out to freezing freezing cold takes old takes exposed for helping us narrow the category down a little bit the first nominee is from kevin sing he's a fifth grader and they were asked to they asked these fifth graders in the yearbook make a prediction for what's going to happen in 2020 and kevin sing said my prediction for year 2020 is that everyone will live peacefully and they will cure every disease there is that's incredible that's a great prediction holy shit great prediction so that was actually from 2010 wow yeah so called it yeah

called it great job kevin sing the next nominee for worst prediction goes to an anonymous scout anonymous baseball scout in a sporting news article the anonymous baseball scout was asked about shohei otani and whether he'll be able to adjust to big league pitching he's basically like a high school hitter is what this guy had to say turns out not really the case uh that's that that and uh member francesa he had he had a good one about shohei otani like he should never be a Yankee this guy sucks yep yep also nominate is james harden james harden in response to a tweet in in uh 2017 somebody said never ever ever ever ever leave houston at j harden exclamation point exclamation point he replied i promise i won't hashtag rocket for life

that's great that's a good one james just never tweet if you're an athlete there's really no upside to it and then the final nominee for worst prediction of the year comes from our friend collin coward adam gase plus greg williams plus sam darnold anyone know where i can pre-order my 2020 a fc championship tickets at netlife stadium it's a great that's incredible great prediction holy not only are they making the a fc championship game but they also have home field advantage throughout the playoffs the new york jets who uh probably should have gone winless last year yes yes uh great job collin oh incredible incredible and the winner for a worst prediction of the year goes to collin coward yeah good job it's tough to beat that one guys unbelievable

real tough to beat that one real tough to beat that one uh all right next up we got a two three left and then we're going to get to Blake of the year uh we have postseason that duke didn't qualify for of the year okay like a postseason like a tournament that they didn't yes yes so the nominees what could this be well the nominees there are uh the nfl playoffs okay uh the mlb playoffs yeah the mba playoffs the stanley cup playoffs and the ncda tournament those are the nominees and the winner is the ncda tournament duke did not qualify for the ncda tournament uh they also wanted to cancel the season when it was pretty clear that they weren't going to qualify coach k uh i think he did yeah he said we shouldn't even be playing this game which he definitely wouldn't

have said if he had a good team well he was upset because they lost he thought that it was okay to play in conference games right but after they lost an out of conference game right that's a real issue right right um this is also a little note here the second year in a row that duke has won all right excuse me that the ncda tournament has won the award for postseason tournament that duke did not qualify for oh wow could it be a three-peat next year that would be incredible i mean if this was great pop of it they'd just finish in third place so coach k just wins okay all right that's a good point fair point point taken maybe shouldn't quit on our country and still be coaching usa that's also a fair point well you can only leave him a victory for so long he's passing the torch he's

giving it up yeah he wants to spend time with his family he's not pat he's still carrying the torch yeah no if you're still carrying the torch you wouldn't be losing these games but he's still working he's wait did he quit or did he not quit he quit usa basketball he's right he's a quitter on the country that's even worse he's a trader i'm pretty sure he served in the military i'm sure you heard that from rico bosco i think he went he went to west point yeah so he cares about our country did he did he fight i don't think so maybe not okay i'm gonna assume that he definitely went to west point yeah he did go to west point a lot of people have gone to west point they're real idiots captain cons i didn't say that whoops uh no he's actually smart yeah smart guy and a great quarterback

too great quarterback well you're saying he's not a great quarterback i mean billy if you're the quarterback for army bro he's d1 yeah d1 here we go bro d1 shout out captain cons cool as a zbt uh the next award goes this is in the category of preemptive take of the year preemptive take of the year now i have no idea what the nominees are going to be for this one because we're all contributing what we think will be the preemptive take of the year so we're just inventing takes that we think will happen some point in the next 12 months yes my nominee for preemptive take of the year is mike florio of pro football talk for saying that if richard sherman had an agent he wouldn't have contracted covid i just think that that's gonna happen yeah

i like for it likes beating that drum that all players should have agents no matter what i like that all right my preemptive take of the year is uh it's kind of cheating but max kellerman saying this is the year that tom brady falls off a cliff yeah that yeah i mean it's every year you know what you're doing yeah you're doing a max kellerman to max kellerman yeah right every year you're like this is the year that he's gonna say yeah right yeah he says it every year it's probably gonna happen again it probably will uh and then hank you had a preemptive take of the year well i thought when pft said this i thought i just came up along at the top of my head uh and with all the conference realignment and stuff going on and all the ncda and i ll i think that the ncda will be

defunct within five years whoa i like it i like that so is the sec just gonna become the the ncda yeah i mean that's it feels like that's where it's trending anywhere where it's all just money they're taking out the administrative school part of it and people are just gonna try and make as much money as they can that would actually be funny if the sec got so big that they took over the entire country so instead of ncda it's like yeah washington plays in the sec yeah why i play it's all the sec yeah or like if football and basketball don't aren't part of that ncda like they might still do the ncda like right for sports but if football and basketball leave correct i mean if it means that we get to hear the sec intro theme song for every football game i'm in yeah which is going away we

should just remind people it's going away um all right who's going to win this you know what let's do something special billy why don't you give us your preemptive take of the year and you win no matter what you say um i think that 2022 is going to be sick all right billy congrats billy your third taking yeah put that on a poster board damn i think 2022 is going to be sick uh coach k did serve in the military he was an officer from 1969 to 1974 did he go to vietnam do you want to apologize why didn't go to vietnam put on the country he didn't go to vietnam hang after by not coaching this year's team yeah he was in directed services teams so that sounds like he was a basketball coach yeah yeah all right last up before we get to Blake of the year

so here it is the last takey before Blake of the year we have all three blakes on reminder it is the tommy lasorda memorial still alive person of the year uh we have some great competition this year dicky v has been nominated he is still alive willy mays still alive even though berry bonds treated that picture where he looked like he was uh smiling next to willy mays casket john madden still alive even though pft is trying to kill him i'm not trying to kill john madden i just i just haven't heard from the guy an honorable mention to prince philip who almost made it this year still alive yeah i think that we need to just acknowledge the fact that he would have been nominated had he not died absolutely he was really the only thing you got to do to win this award is

stay alive he did not stay alive he died yeah there's a big box you got to check off and he just failed it croaked big time died dead hey guys i'm ted db i see the million dollar man and i am here to present the takey uh that would be the pardon i take the takey for the tommy lasorda memorial still all alive person of the year and the winner is the winner is john madden john madden is still alive and doing well and uh congrats to john and all other celebrities and i would put myself in there as well that are still alive yeah i'm 67 years old but i'm still alive and kicking oh one more thing before i go always remember this including all you celebrities who might see this everybody and i mean everybody's got a price for the million dollar man electric

everybody's got a price ted db i see 67 years old that is what's i mean wrestling years i think wrestling years and dog years are the same yeah yeah there's no i think he's the oldest living wrestler so he's ted db i see that would make ted db i see real quick little mass 469 years old incredible he's 469 years old uh okay should we do it should we get the Blake of the year i hang just real quick i i've looked up his service record coach case service record here during his military service he coached service teams and served for two years at as head coach at the u.s military academy prep school at belvoir virginia so his time spent in the military was spent coaching basketball heroic whatever whatever is asked of him it would be nice if you were to run

that back right now yeah still do it for the for our country get back to his roots that we all love coaching for team us okay here it is Blake of the year before we get to Blake of the year it is brought to you by our friends at zip recruiter the zip recruiter knows that the general experience of looking for a job is pretty sucky that's why they figured out a way to make it unsucky when you sign up on zip recruiter dot com you can create a free profile then you get matched to great jobs plus you get a lot more the zip recruiter is going to proactively pitch your profile to employers whose jobs match your experience unlike with other job sites if an actual person from the company really likes what they see they can personally invite you to apply to their job candidates who

are invited to apply on zip recruiter are nearly three times as likely to get hired that's according to 10 000 plus logged in zip recruiter users who reported being hired through zip recruiter during september and october 2020 plus if you like the job you can apply to it and many others with just one click so it saves you saves you a lot of time you just click once and it sends out your resume to all these prospective employers no wonder zip recruiter is the number one rated job site in the u.s sign up for free zip recruiter dot com today experience the better way to find a job once again go to zip recruiter dot com right now to sign up absolutely free put zip recruiter to work for you now here's the Blake of the year okay it is a momentous occasion it is time for the

Blake of the year we have all three blakes here with us right now via zoom and we decided this year we're going to do something a little different because there was maybe some allegations of uh using peds to you know robo pickups and and whatnot so we thought let's get it fair let's get all three guys here there were the allegations let's call them what they were i think that they were there was a little bit of jealousy but it did remind us you're like the houston astros of blakes blake griffin they were saying that you were using electronics illegally to answer phone so we're making it more analog this year yes yes so it's going to be with the lottery machine how it's going to work is every uh blake is going to pick a number we're going to hit the thing and

it's whoever gets it first and we'll just keep going so it could go one round it could go 30 rounds we're going to leave balls out though so it could get down to like three balls and then you just got to hope the numbers right but before we do that we want we asked you guys to prepare maybe a little speech as to why you deserve blake of the year so let's start with brooks the newcomer still brooks what did you do this past year to deserve blake of the year you know being a man of the people i figured um i might as well win the people's open i thought that was a good start good start to the year uh brought back the uh the nineties pitcher goatee fashionable that was nice and then did a lot of things for charity this year uh gave away free

beer yeah that's true um and uh yeah and you two will be cutting for him yeah so true true there's a lot of things okay and you know what you encourage you encourage fan participation in golf which is something exactly it's all about the world yeah the exactly the people all right that's good all right blake griffin you are the two-time uh defending champ so so for anyone who doesn't know there's been three blakes of the year uh blake portals was the first he he has one title uh then that that year blake griffin decided that his country was more important than this competition and was like at practice or something kind of lame but the last two years blake griffin is one so blake why do you think uh you deserve a three-peat here uh which would be historic um

yeah i guess uh to really tell this story we have to take this back to 2020 um you know the pandemic was tough for us all and uh right out of the gate i decided you know what let's help those um who help us and so early on i donated uh to the Little Caesars Arena i was playing in Detroit at the time donated to the um the support staff at Little Caesars Arena you know i just and that was just uh something that i thought was important um if we're touching on charity yeah i held out on dunking for this moment um i could i dunk yeah sure but i needed something to hold hang my head on for the 2021 blake of the year um so it was more of like you know when somebody fast to like prove a point yeah that was my fast you're dunking fast your personal

Ramadan yeah i did it i i i i broke my fast this year um for my campaign for blake of the year yeah yeah we certainly appreciate that would you say that you know if you win three blakes in a row some people are saying that you might be bad for blakes like the league has gotten uh almost like super team of blakes and it's not interesting to watch anymore would you agree with that or do you think that it makes it more exciting if we have a three-time just joined one didn't he he didn't he joined a super team come on ten of my things i prefer the easy way out um yeah i don't know listen there's a good parody in the blake of the year contest and you know uh brooks being a newcomer obviously hasn't got one yet but blake blake bordles has won and and it's been a it's been a tough race

brooks probably been the most successful this year how do the three of us um i didn't really accomplish much but uh here we are so i don't know is it bad for blakes maybe but you know i think there's good parody it in a weird way brooks accomplishing things is actually anti-blake because you're kind of should just chill out like be good but not great you know it felt like he was trying too hard right yeah i'd agree i'd agree i think most people would agree i mean he hasn't really won anything yeah that's true yeah that's true that's true um well he did win he did win the uh british open but column morricawa won't play him in a one round playoff that's true so he kind of won that uh all right so blake bordles our original blake of the year um why do you deserve it

i um i didn't know we were doing the foundation thing um since that's what we're doing my charity golf tournament was actually just canceled you know because of covid but we are gonna get that going again so we'll get money back into uh back into the hometown um i mean i i compared to these two i've done absolutely nothing i uh i have been active streets though i've written all this down i um i have an active streak of seven consecutive trips to the gas station without buying dips i uh i've managed to uh i've managed to keep my hair from growing back and i um you know i had another kid so you know i got that going on oh shit all right there we go are you in uh that's what i got are you in green bay right now no no not yet i also got a new job

yep in green bay i threw give or take four touchdown passes during otas so um wait give or take are we taking how many how many did you actually throw three to eight you pick a number in there all right there's somewhere in there under 10 i think as blakes you guys have accomplished a lot this year um all right so everyone understand the rules we're gonna do this it's a number one through uh is there a hundred in there i think a hundred's in there is it yeah i think a hundred is in there um maybe say nine one through 99 just to be safe i can't remember if a hundred is in there and we're gonna do it until someone gets it exact and that person will be Blake of the year and on top of that they will be the new voice

that introduces you to part of my take when it says it's part of my take presented by barsville sports the beginning of the show we've decided uh we're gonna have a new voice over there so you also win that which is pretty awesome and what what did we say we're Blake of the year is going to donate ten thousand dollars to us personally so that's also something you've won pretty cool yeah question uh so say like Brooks goes gets it right off the bat to me and Blake also get like and then there's a playoff no everybody everybody guesses at the same time don't worry Blake there's no playoff yeah yeah no playoffs don't worry uh i'm fine with like a little bit playoff yeah like a half half of the playoffs half of the playoffs yes yeah um okay all

right so yeah the uh so everyone guesses their number um and then we'll hit it and then we'll just keep going and and billy's keeping track here so that will probably be a disaster but billy is keeping track of the numbers that are picked so we can shout those out before so you don't you know repeat something that's already off of the board um i'm hoping personally from a show standpoint that either someone gets it on the first try or we sit here for an hour guessing ping pong balls so let's hope that one of those two things happens um Blake is as the Blake Griffin as the Blake of the year the reigning Blake of the year i'll let you choose choose first and then Bortles you can choose and then Brooks you choose so it's all the same same spin but go

ahead say a number 32 32 Blake Bortles uh nine nine and Brooks well 12 all right write those down real quick yeah all right here we go 32 9 and 12 this is intense this is going to be terrible terrible podcasting if we go like 10 rounds i think it'd be wonderful 32 9 and 12 oh first numbers 84 ready close close close what's happened was there a ball just went over there no i don't think so okay all right go again uh 62 62 19 19 74 74 62 1974 oh 62 just crept up there 62 62 wants it this is going to be so bad 94 okay no winners no winners oh sorry just reset 84 and 94 are off the board yes

22 29 brookie seven like the brooks is really thinking about this yeah we're all over the board too which i like there doesn't seem to be a strategy here nope oh boy what is that 27 27 oh Bortles was too off too off damn right there this really we didn't think this through this is gonna suck go ahead go ahead 89 39 39 14 14 okay okay you want this one no go ahead 89 39 14 it's 68 it's not 89 that was 89 i thought it was 89

oh shit not good with numbers almost with a three-peat there wow okay we go again uh 12 12 44 44 81 81 whose dog is that that was mine 12 44 81 and we're on round five this is intense 28 28 28 you guys haven't even gotten one now i'm looking at it no yeah we haven't even got one all right here we go we go again 71 93 eight eight eight good i feel like that was a good pick by portals i think that was a good pick i think it was i don't know what i'm just feeling it i don't know i don't know no reason to 71 93 eight what is that oh it doesn't go if it doesn't catch it doesn't count oh 19 19 19

damn with the assist by 92 okay 33 33 44 44 20 20 how many people you think are still listening i think all of all right i think this is the best podcasting that we've ever done 33 44 also you should you should probably go watch this on our youtube channel it's probably way better on that yeah 33 44 20 no oh 25 nope oh yeah it is it is all right 25 i thought it was a false start all right we run out of room here yeah let's take some of these guys off all right go again 89 again 89 again seven seven 41 41 here we go 89 741

oh oh seven almost right there 93 is the number uh that was portals picked from two rounds ago two rounds ago damn he's on it he's on it he also picked seven there and seven popped up yeah it's like when you when you see a batter step up and they're hitting the very bottom of the ball yeah boom you got your timing down portals is definitely sniffing around it okay uh billy do you want to do a quick reset and tell them what numbers they can't pick so we have outside of the pool 84 94 27 68 28 19 25 and 93 okay you guys remember all those okay so 23 is a pick for for blake griffin five five oh his number like that yeah 73 73 yep that's still available

okay go ahead hit a pft here we go 23 five and 73 imagine if it's five imagine what was this oh five was popped up danced out and oh 87 this is now we're getting what we wish for this is going on far too long okay give me 24 24 I'll take 58 58 39 39 I'm surprised none of you have just gone with the same number every time seems like a strategy where you wouldn't have to remember what to yeah but that's yeah you know okay 24 58 39 71 71 now blake griffin picked at four turns ago wow should have stuck with it should have stuck with it 32 32 77 77 okay 16 16 here we go

32 77 16 47 47 is the most frequently selected ping pong ball that's actually a fact yeah if you had just picked that you would have gotten it all right thanks for listening to show guys I'm going 32 again 32 all right so blake griffin is the first to pick the same strategy yep he changed it up yeah I like that nine nine 21 wow so now there's a little gamesmanship going on 32 9 21 oh nine almost jumped up there 45 is the number no trump fans out there huh we're running it again you run it again blake running back 32 again for blake nine nine all right so we got two people on this strategy stick with it 21 all right 21 I like this

32 9 23 33 wow right there right there running it back running it back everyone running it back yep okay 32 9 21 all right so let's just do it yeah let's just hit the button we're running it back those are the numbers now 32 9 21 first one to get it nine just popped nine and 32 are up there 65 hit it again I like this this machine might break now we're being efficient yeah no this was a if we just keep going this machine cost me a thousand dollars did you believe that bought it from China came a little broken 41 off the board doesn't matter we're going to keep going the blake stuck with the same numbers and were unsuccessful for 32 more turns instead of playing that audio on the podcast for 10 minutes we decided to do this

voiceover on the PMT youtube channel we will have the entire competition at full if you care to watch that now let's get back to the action big cat and pft take it away but did anybody like to change their bed would anyone like to change their name 32 9 21 83 all right i'm gonna stand up to all right i'll hit this next one i'll hit that yeah yeah all right here we go 32 9 52 52 that's almost there we're getting close we're getting there i can feel it we're getting there should i go there's an option to do it picks you only have to hit it once it goes like three times in a row yeah let the machine take over 16 yeah man all right i'm gonna do the three option here we go three option

we sure there's a 32 in there 10 10 10 anyone got a 10 no one off one off okay 88 go let's see what's total 56 32 9 21 46 all right let's take a pause real quick let's just pause how's everyone feeling mentally drained how many rounds are we done 47 wait no we have 47 numbers left you counted wrong Billy counted wrong fuck Billy what are we at we have 53 balls 53 balls all right i'm gonna hit it again that's great take we're almost double the expected yeah i'm gonna hit the

three again i'm gonna hit the three again come on 32 9 21 for Blake of the year for all the marbles here it is it's gonna hit 72 if you're just joining in this is our first roll for the Blake of the year one of the all-time misses by me and pft in terms of ideas i think it's funny again 32 9 34 damn so close Blake oh my god this is way too many numbers the Blake of the year here it is the Blake of the year this is the winning roll the winning roll is not 35 okay the Blake of the year the Blake of the year the most prestigious award in all sports in all Blake's will the two-time returning chicken Blake Griffin have a three 55 a new newcomer

which I'm gonna do the three button again or the original Blake Blake borders only the machine knows 32 9 21 48 i'm sorry i'm really sorry i want to apologize profusely point i just feel bad drop the link to your charity we'll donate i'll double it i'll match i'll double this 20 20 i'll double his match doubling my match hypothetically all right here we go lake of the year i can feel it can you guys i feel it in the room it's good energy going right now just good energy it's a holy shit it's a nine it's nine portals the original Blake returns to claim his throne oh my god what a story he outlasted him holy shit Blake rest of the union effort can you can

you give us a victory speech or something the mental fortitude he just had was unbelievable thank you to all the fans everyone supported us along this journey uh Blake and Brooks were incredible competitors they deserve everything they have come in their way in uh in their future endeavors and uh i'm just gonna enjoy this moment yeah incredible moment green green Blake Packers i feel bad for Blake Griffin is his dynasty run is oh actually no if you win next year dynasty's back on it's three out of five i think yeah three out of four would be would be a dynasty Brooks is still i mean it's tough he's got nothing to show for it this is brutal yeah it's what what are you going through right now what are you what's going through your head

honestly i i know i'm so lost right now i did everything i could this year and uh you know just not a mental army get it if you know what i mean yeah i think maybe you need to change up your strategy go towards more of a numbers-based approach or i don't know change your body in a way that i could i could be yeah i'd probably be more scientific with it next year you know yep i think actually if you had done that this year um you probably would have had a better chance because you were just stuck with a number right off the bat i think you picked 12 in the opening round and i i believe 12 hit didn't it yeah so yeah maybe it's a maybe it's a chance that it did hit all right and Blake Griffin that your run is over i mean this

is gotta hurt you still you know it's it's kind of like winning a masters or something like you still are a Blake of the year you just not the reigning Blake of the year yeah you know it's uh you can't win them all um you know for a second that i thought about logging off for Blake's victory speech but i decided to be the guy that actually does the handshake line uh yeah i'm happy for him you know uh listen i think this is this will make bruce and i better next year yeah it's not a it's not you know it's not the end of the world yeah i think standing standing there and watching Blake give his acceptance speech that's probably going to be all the fuel that you need for next year right the confetti's coming down you're watching what happened i'm one of the guys that's

going to post a picture of me in the wait room tomorrow morning yes already training and the worst part was you had 32 and i think 31 hit so you were basically your toe was on the line all right well Blake Blake Brooks thank you very much we appreciate we know how stupid this was but the fans do love hearing from you guys what do you need me to do him oh yeah what's the intro exactly all right so Blake Bortles can you uh say it's part of my take presented by barstool sports and that will be now the new intro all right this is like now making us be at the parade yeah yeah yeah yeah yes yes i'll go anywhere this is also i want to say this uh like four months ago i i changed internet providers for one

reason to be able to answer a phone call faster wow and you guys totally changed the competition so somebody owes me like 99 of them off okay say that uh this is part of my take by barstool sports presented by barstool sports it's part of my take presented by barstool sports go whenever yep it's part of my take presented by barstool sports do it do two more just just do two more yeah yeah just say just go over it like three or four times okay it's part of my take presented by barstool sports yeah maybe with like pardon my take just like a little a little bit of energy but griffin is now okay yeah all right it's part of my take presented by barstool sports it's part of my take presented by barstool sports

i feel like that could have been yeah i think that was it i think that was it um all right good boys thank you so much we'll talk to you later we appreciate it uh use this as fuel yeah get better you know the Blakely year competition is now on there's no uh there's no three p oh all right guys all right see you guys all right thank you guys sorry about that that was terrible it was just the worst unbelievable takies we did all the awards great job everyone great job to all the nominees out there great job to all the nominees been a lot of fucking morons no spoilers um i i think it's terrible to do this right now but should we should we do numbers let's just do let's run it back let's do one more time numbers so everyone say their number

and uh we'll send everyone on their way and we'll see you on friday 69 i'm sticking with nine for Blake 67 18 67 this one actually counts this one actually counts folks 96 96 the incas rode llamas when the spanish showed up because they didn't have horses love you guys did you retweet it enough did you as a listener did you retweet it enough this year i think it's time for them to take a good look in the mirror big cat did you support us do you support the boys listen are you gonna be a friend or are you gonna be a fake friend fake friendships are over good question i'm done with toxic relationships same sometimes you know you feel like you give and you give look in the mirror be nice and then you it's another mirror and then another mirror

and then it comes back through the you step through the mirror because that's the music video and then i reached my hand through the mirror and i take your hand take ease five take ease are here who will win best podcast listeners could be you and the nominees are for bedpots cat best podcast listeners the daxin five dax shepherd let's get a little bit tartan in here stew gots army message board sophia's only fans with an f bill simmonds the billionaires should pay for their own fucking spotifies mike greenberg radio show listeners please be me that was even boring how it was written ryan's kids the resilo nation woja simps adrian wojanowski's podcast i think that's woj

simps woj simps got it woj simps all right who will it i think you're missing one oh is there who's that hank the awls oh the awls well guess what i'm gonna give you 30 seconds to retweet it again yeah and if you've gotten this far to the very very end it's time for the parade five times you did it again wow the greatest podcast listeners in the world that is without a doubt we don't say it enough but we really do love you guys yeah we we actually tried to make it every year we put it later and later in the show we figured we put it in the song all the way to the end but you deserve it thank you all we have the best jobs in the world and it's because of you and uh thank you for listening to the takies without you there is no

us also sorry for Blake of the year that was a debacle love you guys