Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S02 EP42: You better tell your therapist about this...

Episode Date: June 15, 2021

ROB BECKETT & JOSH WIDDICOMBE'S 'LOCKDOWN PARENTING HELL'S02 EP42: You better tell your therapist about this...More misadventures in parenting and beyond...Enjoy. Rate and Review. Thanks - Rob and Josh xIf you want to get in touch with the show here's how:EMAIL: [e-mail]: @lockdownparent INSTAGRAM: @lockdown_parentingA 'Keep It Light Media' Production Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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and member terms apply hello I'm Josh Whitakam welcome to lock down welcome to lockdown the show in which Rob and I to be a parent during lockdown which I would say can be a little tricky. So in an effort to make some kind of sense of the current situation. And to make me feel better about my increasingly terrible parenting skills. Each episode will be chatting to a famous parent about how well they're coping. Or hopefully not. And we will be hearing from you the listener with your tales of lockdown parenting woe. Because let's be honest, none of us know what we're doing. Hello you are listening to lockdown parent in hell with...

Rob Beckett. Howard Bacett. And Josh Widdico. Hello, you are listening to lockdown parenting hell with Rob Beckett Howard Beckett and Josh Whidicom. Doc Riddico. Dock, Doc, Doc, Doc, Doc, Doc, Doc, Doc, Doc, Wickham. Oh, you're in, you've got in today. Not the best we've had, is it?

Sound like you're a script meeting for the last leg. Not the best we've had, is it Alex and that, come on. Ten years I've been doing this and they're sewing up this shit. How's it? How are you, Joshua? All right. I'd say Saturday was a low day in my life. All right. Yeah. Last leg on Friday night, obviously. I went into last leg, it finishes. It's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. We've th. We've th. th. We've th. We've th. th. th. We've th. We've th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's the the the th. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. leg on Friday night obviously. Yeah. I went into last leg feeling finishes late. It finishes, he finished recording at probably five past eleven, ten past eleven. Is it even later this week as well? Because I think next, the one coming on this Friday we finished recording at midnight. Fuck my lie. I did a late show Peter Crouchy's, the Euro show, right? Oh yeah, yeah. And it started at 11 p.m. And I sat there and Tony Adams had said nothing

from the previous like two hours and live on tele, he just didn't shut up. And I just sort of sat there going, I'm just going to let Tony Adams talk. When you and I still found out. I was watching on tellia and I saw a comedian that was me interrupt him I'd be furious. So then I just you know listen to him a 600 caps play me Kenny Samson and Ashley

Carl just ruling off his CV but it's too late to function too late to function that sounds like an album. It is too late though. It's too late. She's got four minutes to them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them them th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thum thum thum thum thu thu thu to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th to th th to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th to to th. I th. I th. I th. I the the the the the the the the the thea. the thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea thea the the the to to to function that sounds like an album. It is too late though it's too late. She's got four minutes to them sleeping his fucking bed. He stayed for a drink after the morning's while he's filming that show. But I stayed for a drink after the last leg but so I'm allowed to have a drink in my dressing room there's no green room. So so Malika's fucking so you sit on your own drinking beer? No, because I can have a maximum of three people in my dressing room. So I kind of, I take guests like the Queen. Like, so you know, I'll have a few people just pop in. Who's in,

who makes the cut? Who makes the Wittakum cut? Well it kind of is a rotating cast because it's a one in one out system. It's like a nightclub. You're like Ocean Beach. Yeah, exactly. Apart from I'm open. But... Brutal. Slav! Sorry.

Sorry, it's just Wayne's Instagram. Does dominate my life sometimes. Yeah. So come off. Can I just ask? I did have a question. Did you sit in silence with Tony Adams for two hours watching the football? Well, yeah, no, basically, no, he wasn't in silence, but he was quite, he's a bit deaf, so he wasn't really chatting much and stuff. And I was really awkward in the makeup room where I sort of said, oh Tony, me and me and my brother had a massive fight once because of you went, yeah, because when you scored that goal against Everton and one of, you know, pathetic little Arsenal fan.

Like, and when that you meet a football, that's what you gotta do, isn't it? Yeah, I know, but it's just awful. I did it when I met Ian Ryan, I was like, no oh god he just couldn't hear me he couldn't hear me but anyways it's when you meet a footballer I just go to my brother told me yesterday that when he he saw Alan Shear in a hotel yeah went up to him panicked and just said thanks for the goals what's a pathetic thing to say to a footballer it sounds like if you know you know you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you to you you to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to the to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the try. try. I try. I try. I try. I try. I try. I try. try. I try. I to to to to to to to to try. What a pathetic thing to say to a footballer. It sounds like, if you, you know, like California man and you're trying to get someone to come into society again, it's like what an alien would panic say to a footballer.

Or like, if you asked me to go and say something, you know, horse dancing was dressage. Dressage, right? If you said to me, that is the greatest ever dressage person, go, to to thage, thage, thage, thage, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thian, thian, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. Like, th. Like, th. Like, th. Like, th. Like, th. Like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, yeah. Right, if you said to me that is the greatest ever dressage person, go and say how much you like them. I would just be like our great horse movement. Thanks for the, thanks for the great movement of the horse. I mean, good. Thanks for the dives, Tom Daly. But your brother's a big football fan. Yeah, but I just think, when you say, Sherry, like I get, like,ugin in the gym and my voice went because I was so Oh, I was so intimidated. The worst one I've had well not the worst but like I was obsessed of Alan Davis growing up right. I loved his stand up and love Jonathan Creek and I remember when I first

I did a bit of tele and stuff and then I was going to the football and Alan Davis was next to me went oh hello Rob how has it going? I was like like next to me, went, oh hello, Rob, how's it going? I was like, oh my God, I was like, Jonathan Creek's talking to me. He went, oh, what was you being funny on the other day? I was like, oh my god, he's seen me on the tellain. And I was pathetic and I panicked so hard because it was like, the person that I loved the blow car was supposed to be meeting outside the train station was stood behind me and I was stood on his foot the whole time and I went well why don't you tell me I stood in your foot I went I don't know because you

was panicking I didn't want to make it worse for you oh it's this sweet though isn't it that oh you know these things Rob one thoo one thoo' the to the thi so so so so so so thi so thi so the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they so they so they so they so they so they soo they soo to to to to to to be s' to be s' to to they's to be s' to be to be to be to be to be they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they to they to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to they to they to to they to to to they to to they to to the to to the to the the the to the to to they so so so and you've absolutely panicked. Oh yeah. You know, yeah, we need another word for it maybe of sort of, where it's the opposite of salt. Melted. Melted. Yeah, when you've melted or sweeted, oh sweet. Sweet, it's sweet, it's sweet, it's sweet because you've melted, yeah, so salty, do you send in when you've met someone famous. I know, I know you've absolutely you've absolutely you've absolutely you've absolutely you've absolutely th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's that's sa, it's the the the the thus, it's just, it's just, it's just, it's just, it's just, it's just, it's just, it's just, it's just, it's just, it's the opposite, it's the opposite, it's the opposite the opposite the opposite the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the that, that, the that, the that, the opposite. the opposite, the opposite, the opposite, the opposite, thousand, that, the opposite, thousand, thousand, the't know why. Anyway, sorry, I was telling me about last time. Your family, I know it's going to be a stressful weekend because we've had to delay the record for this because your daughter was being difficult getting to nursery.

Yeah, she wouldn't put on her shoes and socks and in the end I called her bluff and took her in bare feet. Oh God, that is proper is proper is proper is proper is proper is proper is proper is proper is proper is proper is proper that is proper that is proper that is that is that is that is just stoned her. Full Diana Vickers, Circa X Factor. There was a comedian. Laura Lex, really good comedian. She used to, I don't know if she still does it, used to do gigs in bare feet. I don't know why, but a bit of an arty Edinburgh thing. But then I remember doing a gig of a thin'a'n'er, and she, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, it was like, you can actually hear a fee like stick into the foot. I was like, you've got to wear shoes on the circuit. I don't, you know, it's your health and safety issue.

It's the first rule of comedy. You got to wear shoes on the circuit. Yeah, exactly. You go bare for an end. . their, to the th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. the the th. I. I. the the the the the the th. I. the the the the the their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. to their. their. their. their. their. their. You're, you're, you're, you're, you're. their. their. their. their. their. their. I. I. I. their. I. their. I. their. I. their. I. I. I. their. their. their. I. their. I. the. their. the the the the the the to. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the called? Why did I say that? Last leg. I'm tired. So I left there at midnight. I'd had four bottles of beer, which isn't a lot of beer. But it's enough to affect you on when this. So then I'm in the car. That's enough that you may have texted someone and forgot about it. Yeah, exactly. then you panic. the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. That's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. thi. that's tho. I'm that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the the the that's the the that's the the th. I I I. I I. I. I I. I I. I. I. I I. I I. I. I I. I. I. I. I. I that's that's that's that's that's th. I's th. I's th. I's took. I's took. I's took. I'll took. I'll took. I'm too. I'm too. I'm too. I'm too. I'm too. I'm too. I'm too. I'm too. I'm th. I'm too. That's enough that you may have text someone and forgot about it. Yeah, exactly. And then you panic look in the morning. What have I text you? Um, but, but, uh, it took an hour to get home which was way over what it should have taken. Yeah. Which when you know that you're heading into a sleep situation is disastrous. Yeah. Just caught in short. to which is now full of people having a great Friday night, which is far worse.

You've got to move out of East London, Josh. It's so, it must be so upsetting to watch such happiness in your current stage. It's horrible to see such happiness, Ralph. It's horrible. It must be awful to be so close to people loving life. It's really, it's the last thing I need. Zone 5 is the best thi th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It's best best best best thing thing thing thing thing thing thing thing th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th th 5 is the best thing that's ever happened to my morale. When I, you know, I do the school run, I see someone who's about to embark on an hour and a half commuting to London, and I just think, thank God I sit in my little shed and

talk to Josh. Um, get home at one. Yeah. Baby wakes up more up, more or less, as as I come in. So that, so he feeds to 120 and then he wakes up again at 3, feeds to 320, wakes up at 5, doesn't go back to sleep to 6 when my daughter wakes up. And then it's into Saturday. And then your day starts. And then my day begins. Well, welcome to the weekend. Welcome to the weekend. So you're just starting with no sleep, basically, aren't you, for the weekend?

Three hours 20, but broken into two bits. Three hours 20. So are you, are you up when roses feeding then to sort of help with the bed? Well, I do the changes. Well, I do the changes, which go which goes, are, which, which, which, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th. the, the, the, the, the, th. th. the, th. So, the, th. So, th. So, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, are. So, are. So, are. So, are. So, are. So, are. So, are. So, are. So, are. So, are. So, are. So, are. So, are. the. So, are. the. thr. We.a.a.a.a.athe feeding, if you want any hope of the feeding, leading to sleep. Because you don't want them to get more milk drunk and then you're banging on a napi. Yeah, exactly. Let's be honest, between me and you, you're both trying to justify not banging on the nappy in that situation. You're both trying to make an argument for, I'm sure you've got to to to to to to to to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do their to do their their to do their their their th. thi. I thi. I thi. I to do their their their their to be their their their their their to get their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. And then. And then. I'm going. I'm going. I'm going. I'm going. I'm going. I'm going. I'm going. I'm going. I'm to get. I'm to be to bea. I'm to to bea. I'm toean. I'm to to to to to be to to the. I'm's just a disaster. That would be my first tip as a parent. Probably my only one the way it's going. Also I think a baby's like, you know when you've got a flight and you've got to be up, flights at 7 a.m. and you know you've got to be up at half 4. And when you

know that a baby is going to wake up again you can never get to, you know you can't't there's too much pressure on you. He's a loud baby, Rob. He sleeps so loudly. He sleeps loudly. Honestly, mate. How does he sleep loudly? I reckon, well, he got used to it now, but I reckon, it feels like he's woken up every 10 minutes, but he's just making noise in his sleep. What kind of noise? Like a kind of, like a

like the groans of a baby that's waking up, like a, eh? Kind of. Oh, but then, but fully asleep. My youngest is like that, she even now, she was sort of like talking to sleep quite loud. I used to moan like a trapped boy in my sleep and I think I still do sometimes. But I don't normally, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, I'm asleep, do sometimes but I don't normally, I'm asleep I couldn't tell me but loose as a moan. Yeah, so it's all of that going on. Stuff like that. Obviously the house is, the house is boiling hot. Oh yeah, yeah, because it's high isn't it your house? It's like a townhouse. Though we have moved the air con into, I'll be honest,

I had to get a builder to do it was too heavy for me. He was in the house anyway, he was putting a shower, the glass in the shower. Oh that's humiliate, did you help him? Well I said, could you help me with this and then he just picked up and did it on his own as if to make a point. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. He. He was. He was th. He was the. the. the. tho. He was tho. He was to to to to to to to to to to to to to to Yeah. He was he's very polite about it, but he enjoyed the moment. So when that happens, do your bollocks completely disappear? Or are they still there? I wish they'd disappeared bloody 10 months ago, Rob. That's what I tell you. Am I right? Oh. Yeah. So, um. Oh, that is degrading. Oh, that is degrading. Oh. Oh, that is degrading. Oh, that. that is. Oh, that is. Oh, that is. Oh, that is. Oh, that is. that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is the the the the that is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. tho thoooooo thooooo thooo thooo tho tho thoooo thoo tho tho tho tho tho, it was a real challenge, a real test. I've, do you know what did cheer me up Rob? What's that? In my situation? I got a text from Alice James. Yeah. Ooh. This is tasty. So I'll just read you some highlights of his attempts to get his son to sleep. How old is his son now? Two and a half? Steph has needed someone to lie down next to him for two hours to get to sleep for about three weeks now.

This is completely unsustainable. Also he is obsessed with the Euros elis so he's just laying there going it's Ukraine, Netherlands and Ukraine get the comeback. I said, can you look at your phone? He said no, I count to 100 time and tie to to to to to tie time time time to time time to to time time to to to to to to to He said no I count to 100 time and time again in my head. What does it? Surely headphone in at least. It's a combination of the two-year sleep regression and his room being so fucking hot. Yeah I mean I mean we've had to buy new fans for the girls and it's so hard to get a kid to sleep one when it's hot. And it's like yeah it's so bright to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to they. to they. they. to to they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. their their their their their their their. their. I's their. I's their. I's their. I's their. I's their. I's their. their. their. their. their. their. their. they. they. they. they. I's they. I's they. I's they. I's they. I's they. I's t's try. I's today. I's today. I's try. I's try. I's today. I'm. try. try. I's. I's. try. S. I's try. I's try. S when it's hot but also when it's so bright and it's like, it's nine o'clock. They're like, it's morning. Yeah, why would I go to sleep? Are you insane?

Well, one, they were really, they were really tired the other day, right? Because they'd not been going to, they'd been going to bed about half eight, nine, and then they were not going to bed and they went to sleep at to sleep at to sleep at to sleep at to sleep at to sleep at to sleep at to sleep at to sleep at to sleep at of them woke up at nine and thought it was the morning. And she was like, it's morning. I was like, hey, it's a sunny, but it's not the morning, it's the solstice. Oh my God, it's so hot. It's so, the days are so long. I've had to whip out the paddling pool.

Yeah, I've got a new. . Yeah, we've got a new paddling pool. I've got an absolute blinder. I got it from Costco. It's only 30 quid. It's got a little slide on it. It's got a dinosaur. But I was pumping it up. And as I was doing, I was so hot, so I was pumping up on Saturday. And as I was doing it, seven drops of sweat,

run off my nose at once. And I heard that and at one point I said, when you're older, you better tell your therapist about this, things I've done. I do do nice things. Back to school signals a fresh start for students. New classmates, new teachers, new lessons. Change is in the air. But one thing hasn't changed. The forward government still isn't investing in public

schools. Six years of cuts mean our students aren't getting the supports they need. They can't wait another year. If the forward government won't change, it's time to change the government. Our kids are counting on us. Join us at Building Better Schools.C. a message from the Elementary Teachers Federation of Ontario. What does possible sound like for your business? It's having to spend to power your scale with no preset spending limit. redefined possible with business platinum. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Terms and conditions apply. to MX.c.c conditions apply. Visit MX.C.A. slash business plan. But I don't know what to do with the water though, Josh, because it's so...

You empty every night, don't you, the paddling call, is that. Do you? I know you've got to say that because people are listening, but do you? Well, no, that's what I've been doing, but if it's just impossible. Because it's so heavy and then once the water's going it's going and then you've just got a big wet patch in the middle of your lawn. Yeah, and then that's the only bit that's green and the rest is brown and beige for the sun. What, yeah, what are you like in the sun, Rob? Because I'm obviously absolutely, like I was watching the England game yesterday just thinking I wouldn't have a If I was a top-level football, I wouldn't have an effing hope in this weather I'd have to play I think I'd always just like play I think that's why Trippie played left back

Because it was in the shade do you know what I said this myself Rob I said this myself Well, I said this myself. Well, you're playing the shade. I'm all right in the the shade I'm the shade I'm the shade I'm all I'm all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all the shade the shade the shade the shade the shade the shade the shade the shade the shade the shade the shade the shade the shade the shade the shade the shade the shade I'm all I'm the shade the shade the shade the shade I'm the shade the shade the shade the shade the shade I'm the shade I'm the shade I'm the shade I'm the shade I'm the shade I'm the shade I'm the shade I'm all I'm all I'm all I'm all I'm all I'm all I'm all all I'm all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all right I'm all right I'm all right. I'm all right. I'm all right. I'm all right. I'm all right. I'm all right. I'm all right. I'm all all right. I'm all all right. I'm all right. I'm all all right. I'm all right. I'm all right. I'm all right. I'm all right. I'm all right. I'm holiday I'll sit in the sun because you just get sweating horrible, which is fine on holidays, you get in the sea and just wash the sweat off. Yeah. And then everyone leaves Spain with a fungal infection because they're not actually properly clean themselves. It's so sticky. I'm, I'm a mess in the heat. Well, so we had to send our eldest, he was dressing up for farm day. So they're all going as fancy dress, fancy dress, fancy dress, fancy dress, fancy dress. Also my youngest says garage. Oh Rob, he said to the garage. Oh wow. Fancy dress,

but it was a farming day and she's got a dress as a farmer for end of year assembly, but she wanted to go to the fancy dress dad as a chick. So Lou made this amazing chick. As in a young chicken right. Yeah, not a f-a-a-a' the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their young. Yeah, their young. Oh, their. Oh, their youngest. My young. My young. My young. My young. My young. Oh, my young. Oh, my young. Oh, my young. Oh, my young. Oh, my young. Oh, my young. My young. My young. My young. My young. My young. My young. My young. My young their. It's. My young their. It's. It's. My young their. My young their. My young their their their their their their their their their youngest. My young their youngest. My youngest. My youngest is their youngest is their youngest is their youngest is their youngest is their youngest is their youngest is their youngest is the youngest is their youngest is their their their their their to the fancy dress dad as a chick so Lou made this amazing chick outfit as in a young chicken right yeah not a funky chick you're not using like street slang no just as a chick yeah no she's got as a chick that the animal and but what I realized was a fancy dress that's the animal and but what I realized was fancy dress is when if anyone goes wants it like to be famous or known like recognizable just to wear fancy dress that's what it's like because if you were I was walking to school with a fancy dress and I was oh oh oh an they just like wearing fancy dress every day people just looking at you that is true because it's like if you go on the tube to a part I mean in fancy dress yeah in fancy dress yeah there is that thing of you do you do that that that that that that that that that that that that that th I I I I I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi. thi thi. thi. thi. thi. the thi. thi. It's th. It's the th. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi thi thi thi. I thrown. I'm thrown. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I was th. I was th. There is that thing of you, you do that thing that I would do now

where you think if I just look down and I'm keeping my headphones and no one's going to talk to me it's fine. But they will, they'll go all vampire. The same way as I go to all last leg. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, exactly. But anyway, that's what I can help it. How's your week been Rob? Yeah, it's been all right. She's been pretty good. The, we, we went for a nice little, because the kids weren't going to sleep. So we thought, why don't we just go and take them out for like a bit of dinner or something? So we went to that, it's pub beer garden. It's perfect.

It's all in the climbing thing. And me and who sat there was like, oh my god, so someone's giving you the key to the city. We just sat there and was like, oh so they're just gonna play there while the food comes and then they come and sit and eat it with us then run off and play again. Oh my god Rob, what a life. It was like a real like a real like. It was like, it was like, it was like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, so. Oh, so. Oh, so. Oh, so. Oh, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so,year-old, right, has lost the front two teeth, she's not had the front two teeth as in falling out. Yeah, but yeah, but she knocked them out, she knocked off a scooter two years ago, knocked out the front two teeth, yeah? And then two bottom teeth have fallen out naturally, and then one at the bottom's growing, but completely the back teeth of a shark. Is that because it hasn't got any friends to kind of keep it on the straight and narrow? Yeah, friends. That's, yeah, yeah, exactly.

So I think when they all come through, they all straighten up and then you, you know. So I think they all got come in funny angles. So she's got one down the middle and the middle and then she was on this swing, toing, liked, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, like, like, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and. the, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, top completely covered in black from like the bark, right? It looked like someone tut of tar and feathered her, right? And then she'd come over and another one in our front swabbily? No. She's got the mouth of a crack addict. Oh, mate. What, age? Well, they're age? Well, yeah, so she's off three at the top, accident-aaa. tapapapapapapapapap and to. And a to. And a too, and a tap, and a tap, and a too, and a tap, and a too, and a too, too, too, too, too, to, to, their, to, too, their, their, to. to to to to to to to to. to. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the their, completely... C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. tap, completely, completely, tape, completely, tape, completely, tape, tape, tape, tape, completely. C. accident-based. Well, yeah, so she's off three at the top, accident-based, and then two at the bottom, just unatcher out. Can she be trusted with the normal ones that are gonna come through? God knows, but we'll see what come through.

And if she's got my jeans, they'll be really as they don't take a lot to sort of fall out but yeah it's not it's not ideal though. Well yeah what else is happening in this week? Not much yes sort of the back of their swimming's all good it's quite it's pretty good actually there's sort of like being out they're both good. Your life's good life's pretty good. I did have a my daughter. the life's good. Life's life's life's life's pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty. Life's life's life's life's the the the life's the life's the life's pretty. I I I I I I I th. I's pretty. I's pretty. I's pretty. I's pretty. I's pretty pretty pretty. I's pretty pretty the the the the the their. Life's pretty good. I th. I their life's pretty their life's pretty good. Life's pretty good. Life's pretty good. I the the their. life's pretty good. I I's pretty good. I's pretty good. I's pretty good. I's pretty good. I's pretty good. I's pretty good. I's pretty. I's pretty. I. I's pretty. I's pretty. I's pretty. I. I's pretty. I. I's pretty. I's pretty. I's pretty. I's pretty. I's pretty. I's pretty. I's pretty. I's pretty. I's pretty. I's pretty. I'm. I'm. I'm. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. drinks at dinner. Oh yeah, what are they? Milk, water and squash. And I'm sort of just doing it. Oh, that was, she's got a thing about my food being smelly, the three-year-old. So I had a, but it was like a burger, a burger with salad, right?

Trying to still try and do no carbs, right? And she was like, oh, the dinner. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thin, th. thin, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, oh, oh, oh, oh, thi, thi, thi, oh, oh, to, to, to, to, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, t. t like, I'm sitting here, if you don't like it, you move. She went, all right, she moved her entire, all her stuff to the other side of the table. You have got a daughter that hates you, Rob. I think I'm... She's just got a lot of sass-sass about her. She is. She's got same size feet as the five-year-old. No. Yeah. You've got a sassy little daughter, Rob. I've got a sassy big-footed daughter.

Sassy big-foot, yeah, sassy big-daughter. And they've been foot stamping when we're arguing. You know, like you say you can't do that, hands on hips and foot stamping. Oh wow. And we've got now an immediate time-out, the the the, so where do they go? Set on a step? Yeah, they're expecting the time out of step because we're not having that. But also we've had to whip out the old jar of destiny. Because the respect level from the three-year-old. She's proper three-nager,

always wind you know about absolutely everything. this ain't right that and right so we just sort of we're laying the smack down a little bit we've let her get off with all she's tired because it's hot but then it gets to a point we're like you're being a prick yeah get the pom pom pox out we've been very lax Rob I think I think I think everyone is in the heat Josh and also you don't be too harsh on her because you've got the new baby you want to feel the they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they the the the the they want the they want the they want they want they want they're they want don't want to feel to feel their they're not not don't want don't want don't want to feel they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their to to their to to to their to to their to their to their their to the to th th th to th tho to to the to the tho their their their their their th th this is the this is the war zone Rob. She's good with sleep, she's fine, okay with food as long as it's one of about three food she'll eat, which is fine. Don't care. Do you know what, Rob? If that's the only food she's offered? She eats good food at nursery. That buys me the guilt of the shit food she eats at home. Right, exactly. So that's what we did because that's what we did that's what we did that's what we did their that's what we did their their that's what we did their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheathe. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It's is th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that. that. that. thtry to force her to be adventurous they start being adventurous because they see other kids eat and stuff so you're better off like letting them find their own way rather than going you've got to eat this broccoli yeah yeah exactly so she does that so she's eating one good meal a day exactly

they have but they have all three meals at nursery mate. Oh yeah, all three, yeah, because they're in all that, yeah, exactly. So she's eating well, she's eating well at nursery. So even if she's eating shit at the weekend. She's eating better than you. She's eating far better than me, Rob. I haven't eaten yet yet to day. Really? Yeah, I'm not fasting. eat. I'll re-eat one of them. It's one of them. Rob. Got frubes. Frubs. And a kill for a frub, Rob. Innocent smoothie and a cheese tree. Oh mate. I'm absolutely kill for that. So what was I saying on this? No, yeah, we fight over clothes.

That's the, she's just very, very picky over clothes. Oh, right. Okay. To the point where it's doing my head. to. to. to. to. to. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. to to to the to the to to the the toe, the th. th. th. the the, the the the, the the, the the, thi. thi, the the the their, their, their their their their, their, their, I'll, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their. I. I. I I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I, th. I'm, the. I'm absolutely. I'll, theat. I's, theat. In, theate. In in in in in in in in in in in a innocent. In a innocent. In a innocent. In a the the the the the the the point where it's doing my head in. But what can I do, Rob? It's a power thing, isn't it? It's a power... I think calling a bluff with barefoot to school's a good one. Yeah, called a bluff earlier, I said I was going to throw a socks in the bin. I shouldn't have done that. Yeah, well, I think sometimes tired. Exactly, Rob. She said, you wouldn't wear a socks,

I said, well, we don't need them anymore, I'll throw them in the bin. Then she flipped out about that. I'll be honest, Rob. I didn't show myself in the the the England game in the Euros because this is quite key. I was holding a baby as England scored Rob. Right, it's not ideal is it? It was awful. Because you just have to stay silent. You just have to come, it's like you have to just maintain a dignified silence when you want to just shout that we're going to win the European championships. You want to scream it's coming home but the baby's sleeping?

Exactly. So we booked in a babysitter to come because we were having people around and we were like, we'll book in a babysitter, then she can sort of be on top of the baby so you can enjoy your afternoon. That's a nice idea. Yeah, so she couldn't come. So she couldn't come with an hour's notice. You panicked and tried to text her an hour before the England go out. Oh no, no, so she'd agreed to come the morning. Oh, but she had something else come up. So basically then, I was doing coloring with my daughter during the first half, Rob.

Oh, no, no. It was painful. You've got to take a stronger line on this Josh. I need to take a stronger line. Well luckily you can't do it you can't. What you're doing for the Scotland England game? Oh you're on tell. I last night. So and then Czech Republic's in the evening. Yeah. Yeah. So the kids should be a bed or something. Yeah. The finals in the, don't worry about the final, that's absolutely fine. Can I tell you myself, oh, do I want to hear this? No, right. So, basically, yeah, it was too hot for the hot tub. Oh, for God's sake.

This is right. So Lou, what are you doing on Sunday? Why? She went, well, my family, so basically her sister and her sister's boyfriend live near Brockwell Park in South London, really nice park, but it's a bit of a mission to get to because it's about a 45-minute drive from we are. Park is a nightmare, or you drive to a train station, get on a 10-minute train and then you've got to walk to the park, which is still a bit of a bit nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare the night night night night night night night night night night night night night night night night night night night night to the picnic with my sister, her boyfriend, my mom and dad, and my other sister and their baby and the two kids. And I said, off the bat, I'm not going.

Right? Yeah. Yeah. I'm not going to go. She said, why not? I went, because I think it's going, just let them play in the panelling pool. England are on, I'm gonna sit and watch the England game. And she went, and I don't wanna be driving for two hours across London on a hot day and all that,

and then she went, okay, well I'll take all on my own then. And I was like, oh my God, Rob, you're lucky. Lou's mom and dad come and picked up Lou and the two kids and drove them to a station, they got the train and went to the park and they were there till like five o'clock. Oh why is your life so good? What mainly because it's the kids are easier? Yeah. Because if the kids were your kids age that would not have happened and Lou I would have been sat in my garden holding a baby. So that's more of what it is. And also, we and Lou have got this thing. So also on the Saturday, so Lou had the kids all day. But on Saturday, I had the kids all day. I took them around to my brothers in the morning

to play in the paddling pool with their cousins. And then I think is what keeps us saying yeah is that as much as we do family time we do lots of family time we also do your like time alone with the kids so that the other parent yeah there it's hard for you guys because the new baby is so young and we didn't do it that much when we had young kids but in two years my relationship will be back to normal yeah exactly but by having that whole to their told their their their their their their their their to be to be their their their to be to be to be their to be to be to be to be their to be to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. tod. their. today. the today. their. the the the the the the the today. the time. time. time. today. time. today. tod But by the lue having that whole day on her own with her friends going out for a bit of lunch and getting her nails done and me having the kids all day. When she had them on the Sunday she wasn't like annoyed or resent boy on Saturday. I'll be like, I can't have a chill Sunday. And rather than the truth is like as both being exhausted all weekend. Chilled on Sunday Rob like Craig David. I chilled to their child. I pulled up. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their. I their. I their. I their. I to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I was. I was. I was. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I th. I to to to to to told. to to to their to their their their their their their their their their their their their And also the truth is like as much as I love my in-laws,

they don't care if I go or not. They want to see their grandkids and their daughter. Exactly. Do you know what I mean? So and I get on with them and they're nice and the same with my family, you know, you don't have, I think sometimes that pressure of keeping up expectations of or it be rude. You know what I mean? Because having your own time is you need that? I totally agree Rob. Let me let me put that in perspective with what my existence is like. Okay. I just looked across the room and saw a half-eaten bag of mini cheddars and thought I don't know how long that's been there, but could I just eat that for breakfast? I think you can. Yeah. I'm not going to judge, Josh.

That's the way, well I'm going to have one now. That's the way I'm feeling. I like, Saturday morning, three and a half hours sleep, Rob. Yeah. Had to unblock a toilet. Did you ask the builder? Did it myself? I tried to do it once and then I broke it more. Plummer came this morning. Yeah. Flummer gaines.

So I'm failing to unblock a toilet at 10 a.m. on three and a half hours of sleep. I then took my daughter out to the park where I met friends, right? Yeah. And to give Rose some break just to chill out. How many people did you see just sat on picnic blankets drinking cider? Yeah, just everyone's having a great time in Victoria Park. It's a party park. It's a party park. It's a party park. Laughing gas. Laughing gas all over the bloody shop,

kicking through the canisters on the floor. Honestly, mate. There's some people smoking weed in that park. I don't want to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to be. I's. I's. I's. I'm. I'm. I's too. too. too. too. too. too. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I's. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's. It's. It's th. the. It's theat. It's. t. t. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. to. ta. ta. It's just just. It's. t weed in that park. I don't want to, I don't want to point fingers, but I've smelled it. Bloody Woodstock. Yes, I bloody woodstock, right. And so then went for lunch with my friends to just get my daughter out of the house as long as possible. When I got home, our baby had refused to go down and sleep without being on Rose. So Rose had spent four hours basically holding a hot water bottle unable to go for the shower that she wanted to have

and was the reason I'd gone out. Oh and she and she was going to get it when he was to sleep. Yeah and he just wouldn't go to sleep except on her. Oh yeah and did you try and then but still crying for her? No no he so he'd go to sleep on a human but she was the only only only only only only only only only only the only the only the only to be. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to to to to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to.. to. to. to. to. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to. to. the to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. I. I. to. No no he so he'd go to sleep on a human but she was the only human in the house so actually me going out meant that she was absolutely stuck with the baby yeah all morning. Oh no and you think like you've done a favor by not being at being there and giving her some chill time but no in fact I've given her you made it worse I've given her a complete hath it thrown her. Then I'm th th th th th th th th th th that that that that that that that that that thr-I I've thr-I thr-I thrown thrown thrown thrown thrown thrown thrown thrown thr-I throwned throwned thrown thr-I thr-I thr-I thr-I thr-I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that thrown. the throwne throwne to to thrown. throwne throwne throwne throwne the thr-you thi th. Then I'm being trolled by the way, Rob. Oh, who's trolling you? A historian. I'm ready for some of the most stiff-necked beef I've ever heard. So why are they trolling you? I get a letter in the post Rob. It's a jiffy bag. Yeah. I can see it's from off the curb, which is my agent, right? Yeah. So it's been

sent to them and they forwarded it on. Do you remember a couple of weeks ago when I was sounding off about seeing the top 10 Sunday Times bestseller list? Yeah. And I said there's even a book in there just called the Anglo-Saxons. Yeah. So I open the Jiffie bag. It's only the fucking Anglo-Saxon's our back book. He's gonna stay in that list now that we can just plug in it. He's gonna say Mark Morris, he sent me a letter. Oh that's great bands from Mark Morris. that we could be just like in it. Mark Morris. Great banter from Mark Morris. Dear Josh, I wanted to call it Reading Bear Wolf twice a day, because my book's called Watching Neighbours Twice a day. Nice, yeah.

But the publishers insisted on a more prosaic title. Good luck with your own book in September. Number six is the position to beat all the best mark. Oh, that's lovely. Fair play to him. We've got a, you've got to beat the Anglo-Saxes. Well, I, I'm absolutely, you know, up for that. I'm up for that, right? I would be confident of this, Rob. Yeah. My publisher, my editor, he listens to our podcast. Yeah.

It's your to editor, who's his friend, right? Yours listens more than he does, because he always says, my mate said, so this from the podcast, it's your duty as well, mate. Anyway, He's due diligence, mate. Yeah, due diligence. At least till September, then you can let me get run free. Exactly.

I'm so excited about the mental stiff-deaftec events I'm going to have to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to gotalk about my book because I'm worried because they're going like oh pick your favorite book and then we'll talk about your book. I can't you know talk bring hard bastards by Kate Craig. Just because you write a book that means you read them you know what I mean? So Mark Morris obviously is trolling me. He's said you need to be number six right so that my publisher he said I listened to your podcast a couple of weeks ago. I've got some bad news for you. You're not going to make the top 10. I'm like, what? Wow. He's like, I should warn you. I don't think you're going to make the top 10 because you're out in September. All of the books are out at that point. If you wanted to make the top 10, you need to go out now. I'm like, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, thi, well, thi, thi, thi, thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, to to. to to to to to to. I'm like, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what. I. I. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What, what, what, what, what, what. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What, what, what. What. What. What. What. What. What. What, I'm like. What, to. What. What, to. to. to. to. th. to. th. th. th. to. the. the. the the. the the the th. What, I'm the the the the the the to. What, what, what, what, bloody decision when to release it, mate. I didn't go, I want to be out in September when it's basically fucking, you know, like competing.

Holly Willoughby's there? Yeah, he was like, you know, what's going to happen? The hinges are going to, the hinges are going to, the hinges. The hinges are big a meal ticket than I am? Mate, the hinches are so much bigger than you. I don't even know who the fucking hinges are, mate. They are mega. First they beat us in the podcast charts and now they're knocking me out of the Sunday Times bestseller list with their book that he doesn't even know if it exists he

was just using as an example. But isn't the process of writing writing the the the ththat read in it connects with the bigger prize do you have to be in a top 10 Josh? Just if anyone's thinking it please don't send me any more copies of the Anglo-Saxons I don't need them. Is your voice all right? I haven't eaten or had anything to drink today and I ran back from nursery. You're on fumes. I'm on fumes. I've I've thum thum thum. I've thum. that more tired I thought was quite a good one to read her. This one's from Hannah Dawkins on Instagram tired in capitals oh I feel for you Josh but I'm going to try and top you I have a 16 month old who people have other people have referred to as very fast and inquisitive and having good lungs oh she still gets up one to two times times times times times times times times times times times times times times times times times times times times times times times times to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tooooooo'a. I to to to to to up one to two times a night to play and

will be up at 5 a.m. on the dot. I'm also 26 weeks pregnant and I work three 12.5 hours a week as a midwife. I currently have sinusitis, low eye levels and I cry at a good cup of TV. But on the escape front I often leave early to go to work so I can have a cup of breakfast quietly before a shift. So she's working the system to her advantage, but yeah Hannah's very tired, midwife, pregnant and a 16 month old keep waking up. So you're not on your own Josh. There's other tired people out there. It's weird, isn't it? because I've realized in the last few weeks how much tiredness is the key the key the key the key the key the key the key the the the the the tiiii. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to ti. ti. H. H. H. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti much tiredness is the key to if you're not tired. Anything, anything, if you're trying to be a parent, you're trying to diet, you're trying to do exercise, you're trying to do well at work, go have a meeting, sleep so

important. It's so, you know what, it's underrated if anything, it's so good sleeping. It is so good, it's really good. It's a good, it's a, it's a, it's, thapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapap. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, that, that, that, that, that, that, to, to, to, to, to that, to to to to to to to, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, that, that, that, that, the the thr. the thr. try. thea. thea. try. thea. thea. to,, Josh. It's just a blip. Anyway, well, we're gonna, where this is a great time to talk about it. We're having a little break from the podcast, aren't we, Josh? We're gonna, you and Rose to try and recover. We're having a little end of series break. We're gonna put have some best off episodes that are gonna be coming out for the next couple of weeks and we'll be back after the euros, won't we?

We're just gonna have a little break to a little summer break. Get your life in order. Get my life in order. I need it. Yes. We're gonna come back the new name, Rob? No, so basically the plan was to call it, Rob Beckett and Josh Riddickham's parenting podcast, but everyone was quite anti that. Yeah, a little bit too stiff neck.

So we're thrown. We're thinking about the common consensus is, we've had a few choices every day parenting. The parenting podcast with Rob and Josha Rob's parenting podcast featuring sexy Michael's voice to please the mothers. I think Michael's just put that in. I don't think anyone's asked for that. But I think we're just going to drop the lockdown and keep the hell. Yeah. Well, so it's Rob Beckett, Josh Whitak comes parenting hell. And so

so when we come back we'll have dropped the lockdown and hopefully as well I think they're I think now postponing Freedom Day but hopefully shouldn't be for too long so lockdown I fit hopefully should be a thing the past and we can just be parent in hell isn't that exciting Josh? We'll be coming back with more great guests we just we just we just needed a mid-year break didn't we Rob yes basically that's and then we can get loads of guests. If you've got any contact details for them, that would be great. Yeah, any people you want on the show, let us know those suggestions we can try and track them down.

Right, Josh, I've got more people that are more tired than you here. Go on. This is Sarah on the shit-S sshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshshsh, on, on, on, on, on, on, on, on, on, on, on, on, on, on, on, on, on, on, on th, on thi, on thi, on thi, on thi, on thi, on thi, on thi, on thi, on th, on th, on th, on th, on th, on th, on, on, on, on th, on, on, on, on, on th, on, on th, on th, on th, on th, on th, on th, on th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, the the the the the the the the the the thea'''''er-a'er-a'er-a'-s, thi. thiturn three never slept through still wakes three times a night this is what terrifies me Rob well I'm all this poor Sarah I'm on my own with him I haven't slept for more than three hours at a time for 3.5 years as I couldn't sleep when I'm pregnant as I had to pee constantly do I win I mean I'm Sarah Sarah I thi that is that is full on like this is people thi th you th you th you're winning at the moment, Sarah, that is, that is full-on. Like, this is, people get so used to it. Yeah. So, I tech, our friends, they've got a child, he's two and a half, he's not, he's never been a good sleeper. Yeah. And he's been ill this weekend, so we texted them this morning, said, how was last night? And th w, not bad actually. He woke up at 440 and didn't go back to sleep, but not bad. And you're like, imagine getting to the

point where that is not bad. Imagine in your life waking up at 440 and that being the start of your day and thinking, I'd take that. I mean, yeah, well, yeah, it is brutal. But it's temporary, Josh. It is temporary. It is temporary. I've got an idiot tax message here. Yeah. Idiot tax is your old dad said,

a thousand pounds a year you can put aside for being an idiot, so you're not too harsh on yourself when you do makes, a very good self-care method. Hi Josh and Rob, obsessed with the podcast, has had me how I will after every week and I just wish it was around when I was in the newborn trenches as would have made those long nights more bearable. Anyway, I do think that this is a great podcast for those horrible middle of the night feeds. Anyway, just wanted to say the acceptance of idiots. No, we just don't, we can't us us, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, we can't, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the the th... th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, that, that, that, that, to that, to to that, to that, that, that, thr. thean, thean, th too loud. He's just, Rob. Oh, we just don't, we just sit in silence.

Rose, I'd say, when Rose is feeding at 3 a.m. She has the eyes of someone who's come back from Vietnam. Just looking, looking straight ahead. Who's like the Paul McCaffery one last week? We had to edit out so much stuff when he was so tired, he was just going, yeah, um, and it just stopped didn't they? Yeah, it's like, you're right, Paul? Yeah. Anyway, this is idiot tax.

Sorry, sorry. No. I just wanted to say the acceptance of idiot tax has changed my life. Today I got a Tesco delivery of a full crate of Proseco and six packs of floor wipes from Tesco. Confused I then realized I'd booked a slot and stuck some random items on I did not need with the intention to change it later because you have to put stuff in there to keep your slot. But I never did, I never did change the order due to toddler tiredness and general high mental load holder at the moment. Anyway, whilst usually I would have been really pissed off myself for myself for wasting 50 quid, I found myself smiling and saying, oh well, idiot tax, game changer. Thank you, Frances. It is a great one. Send your idiot tax emails in. I love idiot tax. It's one of, it's such a liberating thing because you can be so hard on yourself unnecessarily,

you know? Yeah. Also, you know, that Proseco, you'll drink it over the summer at some point, put it in the fridge. Do you know what I mean? Exactly. Where's the plunge. Oh right, do you want another Instagram? Yeah. And then we'll do a small business shout out. Okay, Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob. An easy win for swimming.

I enjoyed that. I don't know, this is from pasty, but that's from pasty. Yeah, I'd say I'd be slightly annoyed if every email started like that. Yeah, there's no Josh involved here at all but thi. to thi. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Rob. thi. Rob. Rob. Rob. tho. Rob. Rob. tho. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. th. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. there's. there's. Rob. Rob. there's. there's. there's. there's. there's. there's. there's. the is. the is. the is. the is. th. th. th. th. th. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. th. Rob. th. th. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. to. Rob. to. Rob. to. to. to. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. Rob. It's. It's. It's. It's. Pasty Man Dan. Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob, dot, Rob. As an easy win for swimming, get both girls changed at home in their swimsuits, hats and goggles, then chuck on a onesie and easy slip on and off shoes. I do this and it makes swimming drop off so much easier.

Arrive, no need for a cubicle. Shoes off, onesy, pass them to the teacher. You are welcome, my fellow guna. Love the podchaps, keep up the good work. Thank you, pasty man, Dan. Speaking as a swimmer, a parent, a swimming parent, Rob, does that sound like a realistic thing that you'll be implementing into your life? Yes, it does. And I think as well, if we got like a sort of ones, type of material so that then rather you know like so that you then you could put them in it when they get out and it almost like dries them off do you

mean yeah I'm gonna try and find a toweling type onesy so I've got them little towels like the hoods that wraps around them they don't really cover them up enough yeah yeah that's a good that's a good shout out I'll try that any anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore anymore any any any any any more any more any more any more any more any more any more any any more any more any more any more any more any more any more any more any more any more any more any more any more any more any more the this one one their their any more any more any more any more any more any more any more any more any more any more any more any more any any more any any more any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any any's Imperial War Museum in the Klasnikov room. Yeah, oh bloody how. A whole class of Russian school kids watching a man stripped down and reassemble a Kalashnikov. They were about nine and ten years old and totally taking it in their stride. Mad Russian bastards. I'm gonna say it, Rob. Yeah. We're in trouble. Western democracy is in trouble. Well, yeah, especially like 10 year olds can strip back an AK 47. Right, Josh, small business shoutouts, let's go. Let's do this. Right, shall I go first Rob? Yes, please. Hello Josh and Rob Rob Rob. Rob. First thing. Oh, I like it. You're still on fire you're not eating or drink.. You're kneel by a mouth, but you're faring on all cylinders.

Oh God, mate. I am. I am. All right. Firstly, thank you so much for the podcast. Yeah, you lost it a bit there. I think it. Just take it. I'm up and down. Um. Firstly, thank you so much for the podcast. It's genuinely made this year a lot less shit for me. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. th. Oh. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Firstly, thank you so much for the podcast. It's genuinely made this year a lot less shit for me and is high on my lockdown survival list. I wanted to let you know about the small business my cousin Katie started last year whilst on furlough. It's called baby eats out and is a service that helps parents find baby friendly places to eat out. Oh, that's good. That's useful. Yep. The symbol scoring system lets people find out if the eatery has changing facilities, high chairs and kids menus, as well as showing the staff are happy to support breastfeeding and bottle feeding. It's bloody brilliant and it's on Instagram at underscore baby eats out.

That's underscore baby eats out. Lots of restaurants have already signed up in their windows. She's worked so hard on this, I'd love it to be a real success. Thanks for making me laugh at a time when laughs can be hard to come by, Anna Farmer. Nice. That is a great idea because I'm gonna be honest with you. I think that's another one to the West. Death to the West. Yeah, I know. But I am winning on that one.

At underscore Baby Eats out. Yeah, that is good because the amount of time you go to someone who's a bit cool and trendy and I haven't got any baby seats or no baby food and that's nightmare. Oh, in East London. So not my scene anymore? They can sit on chairs my kids. Anyway, here we go. Hi guys, great podcast. Thanks for your helping getting us all through this ruddy nightmare. If you don't, that's so British, this roddy nightmare. It's ruddy nightmare. Anyway, if you don't have any other requests from people trying to pedal cufflings in a time when no one is even wearing a thany thany thany thany thany thancy thancy thancy thancy thancy thancy thancy thancy thancy thancy the, let thi, let thi, let thi, let thi, let thi, let thi, let thi, let thi, let thi, let thi, let alone, let thi, let thee, let thee, let thee, let thee, let thee, let the, let the, let the, let thee, let thee thee, let thee, let thee, let thee, let thee, let thee, let thee, let thee, let th, let th, let thee, let thee, let thee, let thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the theat-in, theat-in, theat-in, thea' thea' thea' thea' theat-in, thethe email. Oh, that one, let me get, that didn't, in a time when no one is wearing a suit, let

alone a fancy shirt that requires couplings, here I am. Good on you, mate. I sell, slash, mate, cuff links and badges featuring micro-machines, posth-mosh in my Etsy shop, core car cuffs and that's CUFFS for cuffs.exi.com. If you guys ever need any fancy unique cuff links for your stand-up shows of all ceremonies, weddings, Barvinas, funerals, court appearance, etc., that I would gladly send you some for free. No, we don't for free. We'll use, you sell him, mate. Anyway, these are really cool cuff links and the can see on his Etsy shop did he leave a name he didn't leave a name he didn't leave a name anyways to tell you what he's written the funniest email we've had in a that's a lovely piece of writing

someone but also Father's Day coming up cuff links the the the the the Father's Day the the the the they's great present yes they're really cool and stuff like that little couplings, the Star Wars ones, those are really cool. Two great businesses to end the series. Oh one of them are like the monopoly pieces. They look really cool. Yeah, so that is for you. Who are you in the monopoly? Rob?

Who do you play? I like the dog? Yeah, I like the dog. and we'll be back after euros, end of June beginning of July, we'll announce on Instagram exactly when, but also between now and then we will be putting out some best-offs for you to enjoy. Also, they're quite a good thing to maybe send to people that you want to get on board, you know, and become... It's a great way to start listening to the show is the best-off. Exactly. So that would be very helpful if you could share those best off episodes with your friends and family to get them on board for when we come back with series three. Anyway, well Josh, have a nice rest and enjoy some lovely time. This is your technically your paternity leave

with your child and your children and we'll see you and we'll see, oh god, I've run out out of steam. The perfect end. This is what happens with me, I'm on or off. It's the perfect the perfect the perfect the perfect the perfect the perfect th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Oh. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, tho. Oh, thi. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, thi. Oh, tho. Oh, tho. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, tho. Oh, tho. Oh, tho. Oh, tho. Oh, tho. Oh, tho that, this is what happens with me, I'm on or off. It's the perfect end. See you soon for series three and we'll drop the lockdown. Bye! Bye!