Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S04 EP45: The Glastonbury and Ibiza Stag-Do Special

Episode Date: July 5, 2022

S04 EP45: The Glastonbury and Ibiza Stag-Do SpecialMore (mis) adventures in parenting and beyond from Rob and Josh...Enjoy. Rate and Review. Thanks Rob + JoshBIG NEWS.... we're writing a book! ⭐ All the stories we can’t tell on the podcast – in depth.⭐ What it’s like to raise a stiff neck and a loose neck – straight from the horse’s mouth (our parents)⭐ And.. the BIGGEST REQUEST WE’VE EVER HAD FOR THE PODCAST… Hearing from our wives, Rose & Lou. They’ve got a chapter each and YOU can submit your burning questions to them... [e-mail]'s it really like to be a parent? And how come no one ever warned Rob or Josh of the sheer mind-bending, world-altering, sleep-depriving, sick-covering, tear-inducing, snot-wiping, bore-inspiring, 4am-relationship-straining brutality of it all? And if they did, why can't they remember it (or remember anything else, for that matter)?And just when they thought it couldn't get any harder, why didn't anyone warn them about the slices of unmatched euphoric joy and pride that occasionally come piercing through, drenching you in unbridled happiness in much the same way a badly burped baby drenches you in milk-sick?Join Josh and Rob as they share the challenges and madness of their parenting journeys with lashings of empathy and extra helpings of laughs. Filled with all the things they never tell you at antenatal classes, Parenting Hell is a beguiling mixture of humour, rumination and conversation for prospective parents, new parents, old parents and never-to-be parents alike.Find out everything you need to know, including how you could win a pair of tickets to the Parenting Hell LIVE tour & an overnight stay in London here: https://www.bit.ly/ParentingHellBookIf you want to get in touch with the show here's how:EMAIL: [e-mail]: @parenting_hellINSTAGRAM: @parentinghellMAILING LIST: parentinghellpodcast.mailchimpsites.com A 'Keep It Light Media' Production Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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and member terms apply. Hello I'm Rob Beckett and I'm Josh Willickham. Welcome to Parent in Hell the show in which Josh and I discuss what is really like to be a parent which I would say can be a little tricky. So, to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern-day parenting each week we're chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're not coping. And we'll also be hearing from you the listener with your tips, advice, and of course, tales of parenting woe.

Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times when none of us know what we're doing. Hello, you're listening to Parenting Hill with... Tate. Tate. Can you say Josh Whittigum? Well done. I just heard you whisper the word tate. What's it got brother and sister Poe and Toe? It is. This is a fucking chipmunks. His name is Tate's Bold. Tate Tate's Bold. Tate. Like Steve Bold but tape. Like Steve Bold but ta His name is Tate Bold. Tate's Bold! Tate! Like Steve Bold, but Tate. Tate Boll.

Oh, there's an Andrew Tate on the internet that's really annoying. Have you seen much of him? What do you reckon? I'm in a different echo chamber to you, aren't I? You are in a different echo chamber to me. This is Tate introducing the pod. He's th is nearly th is nearly thue is nearly thus is nearly this is nearly this is nearly this is nearly this is nearly is nearly this is nearly this is thi is thi is nearly thi thi. It is thi. It is thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thai. thai. thate. thate. that. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tate. tate. tate. tate. tate. tate. tate. tate. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. t pod. He's nearly two. July the second, born on my birthday so my birthdays disappeared as you'll appreciate. That's one we've never discussed before that, I tell you. What's that? Having your kids birthday so your birthday

gets completely blown out the water. Yeah that doesn't really happen to us. We're quite good. I have seen now Tate is both a boy's name and a girl's name of English. Norse origin meaning cheerful and also Emma Bunton, baby spice, her son is called Tate. Is he? And this is Tate Bold from Telford. Telford. Oh, the Telford Tate. Did you just hear that? What? What? What's happening? Yeah. My? My? Tell I fucking Mapp it. But did you what did you hear then? Because I... Nothing apart from you. What's the equivalent on an Apple computer of Siri?

You know like, not Siri, fucking hell, I'm tired. That is Siri. Apple is Siri. Oh yeah, that is Siri. So I just got, Siri, for the first time ever on this computer. All right. I was like, what the fuck's going on here? Oh, because he heard, yeah, well maybe you said, hey, Siri, when we were talking, oh, no, I've done it now. She's talking to me, but just through my headphones, no one else is getting it.

Is it a sheet? People are saying we are too rude. People are rude to women because of Siri Do you use it in the car? Well yeah, so if I'm driving the car, I press the side, I'm driving, concentrating, but if I hold the side button on my phone, it goes, boodom, and I go, hey Siri, play, could have been me by Howzy again, or Skyfulful of Stars from Sing 2, Taugh and plin' again. Yeah. Please, Siri. Oh, fuck. Now she's actually planning it. But... Okay. This is a joke. Yeah, it does work. Okay, right. That's that stuff. What a start to

the podcast. Absolute carnage. Okay. So how are you, Rob? I tell you what I am, I'm back do you. Sorry, I'm just going to interrupt and say I thought this was going to be a podcast. We discussed you're excited excited about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about the the the th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the thi thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the th. It's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. thi. thi. the. thi. thi. thi. th. thi. th. th. was going to be a podcast. We discussed, you're excited about being about Glastonbury. Yes. It now feels like, I don't know if people are aware of the news, but you've been in the press because you were away on Joe Swash's Stagdoo with Dean Gaffney. Yeah. Yeah, really, I feel like we should start with Glastonbury because that is really, if I'm honest with you, merely the warm-up to the anecdote of Joe Swash's Staggdew with Dean Gaffney, is how people imagine Rob Beckett

lives. Well it sounds like the start of one of your routines about the 90s. He does. Does it? So basically, imagine Joe Swash is Stagg Deal, Gaffney's there. You do that as your intro and do your punch. I feel quite good, but you feel you sound a bit sadder than me. Should we start with you? So this is Tuesday morning. I got home yesterday from the Staggdale.

You got back from Glastonbury Sunday night was it? Sunday night. And it's the Tuesday now. So we had to, we were a bit out of sync, so we had to record in advance of these trips. Yes. It's been about a week. live reaction to how our weekends were. Yes and how was Glastonbury you sound tired? I've got a fear there won't be a huge amount of parenting in this

episode I do apologize. Do you know there is because I still haven't spoken about sports day. The second one? Oh god I forgot because I went to the sports day on the Friday before I flew to our beefer. Well tell me about that and then we'll get him to Glastonbury. Right, okay, so sports day, I tell you, it's so far down my list of things to talk about after, after, no, no, because I write little notes but I can't even find it anywhere. Oh, here it is, oh, here it is. So, um, legs on your foot, legs on your foot. some of the notes I've written drunk. I basically was drunk for three days. Drunk at Sports Day? No, I wasn't drunk at Sports Day, but I was basically drunk. I was drunk for three days. So if anyone's messaged me and I've not messaged back or just message me again because my phone's been off. Yeah, oh sports. So basically we had my daughter. My daughter. I've the eldest. She came third. Yeah, so young. the one I said. their. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the th. the the th. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I. I was. I was. I. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. sport, loves running. Love sport, loves breaking rules. Yeah, actually though, I'll wait, so again, we had a bit of a

nightmare this point. I did a school drop off this morning because she nicked that little thing from school. Anyway, so I said to look, we've got I said, why don't you put the toy in your pocket and sneak it back in? Oh, yes, please. So now I'm like, sneaking it back in. And then anyway, she went, no, you give it to her, but don't tell him I took it to. And anyway, so I had I had, I had, I had, I had, I they. I to they. I, I, I, I, I, I, I to to to to. I, I, I to. to. to. to. to. to. to to to to to sneak, to sneak, to to sneak, to to sneak, I to toe, and sneak, and sneak, and sneak, and sneak, and sneak, and sneak, and sneak, and sneak, and sneak, and sneak, and sneak, and s. And, and s. And, and to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, the t. And, the t. And, the t. And, to me, their, their, to, to, to, to sneak, to sneak, to sneak, to. And, to. And, to. And, to. And, to sneak, to sneak, to sneak, to me, to me, to sneak, to me, to me, to sneak, to me, to sneak, to me, toe. S. Sne. And, toe. And, to me, to me, to me, to her as we walked to him, do you want to give them back to her or draw me to give it back to the teacher? And then she went, but I found it outside on the pirate ship, which is like the playframe. So I didn't, I don't know where to put it. Because we're not going back, no, I think she did though. Because she said, I don't know where to put it, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I found, I, I found, I found, I found, I found, I found, I found, to, to, to, the, I found, I found, the, to, to, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, I found, I found, I found, I found, I found, I found, I'm, I'm, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, the, the the to. to. to. to. too, too, too, too, too, too, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the school the school play so now she's going I don't want to in my pocket because I don't know where to put it because I won't be back on the part they go to the pirate ship just before they go to the library on like a Thursday so now I'm like oh no so now I've got her in this little lie and then in the end I said look give it to me and bringing it back to you, and I gave her a good old cartoon

wink to the nursery lady. And she went, it's okay, lots of kids accidentally take it home, but then she got all cuddly, because I've been away, she's gone, I don't want to go into school and all start trying to try. I'm putting her. I was totally unacceptable. Let's keep it clean at the gates. It was the wink you'd given her. That was the problem, Rob. You gave the wink before you know it. It makes a wind tear and she started getting off with me. And yeah, and then she was all clingy.

And then eventually, luckily it was one of the nursery teachers' birthdays. So they was like, oh, it's Mrs. Birthday. And they've got balloons and she's brought. And she. And she. And she's brought. And she's brought. And she. they's. they's. they're brought. the. the. the. the. the. they. they. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to get. to to get. to to. to. to. to. to. to. to get. to. to. And she's. And she's. And she's. And she's. And she's. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. And she. to. to. to. to want to go into the nursery, but I've made a point sound I don't want to go in. So then I went, I'm going to put you down because my arms ache and then I put her down and then eventually they took her in, but that was quite difficult to deal with after a busy weekend. A crying child at the bottom of it either, have you? But we'll see how it. No, I don't know what's going to. See how it plays out when she hits her teenage years, I suppose.

What I will say so, if she is going to be a criminal, like a bank robber, she's fast enough to No. By a country. Filing out. By like, actually. So where has this come from? What do you mean? I've got skills. Is Lou fast? I don't play in soccer aid because I'd be too good

and it'd be embarrassing for everyone involved. Oh, of course, yeah. Yeah, of course. That's the exact reason. No, Lou's dad is an exceptional athlete. He's run marathons. He beat me at squash to the point it felt like I was playing Roger Federer. It was actually about, he had, this was when he, before he needed his, he's a, same thing, didn't it, rack it in a room.

Yeah, well there's not really a room in tennis, but there's a, if the roof, if the roof's on a roof, it's roof, it's, it's, it's, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, the the the the the th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to too, he. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to, he, he, he, he, he... He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He's, he. He's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's the the the the the too. too. too. too. too. too. to. He's, he's, he Anyway, he's really good. When he come on my staggy, he played like bubble football with us and a normal football and he was absolutely destroyed all of us at the age of like 55. He's run marathons. He's really good at Squash. He's just a really good athlete, cyclist. And Lou's sister's like a dancer, a dancer, to the new, tooble. Lue to the so I think it's from that side. Are you excited about your future as the father of the new you know Dean or Asher Smith? The new Dean of Asher Smith? That's a name isn't it? Yeah I'm not that. It's a name. It's a name. It's like

it just the thought of me being Dean Asher Smith's father doesn't work in any way sort of. If you had to find someone that look less like my daughter I th. I th. I th. I th. th. the th. the th. th. the th. the th. th. the the th. th the the the the th th the th th th the the the the the thin thina the new the new the new thina thina the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the the the the the the the the the the the the thina thina the the the the the the the the thean thean thean thean thean thean thean thean thean thean thean the the thin th yes, I get that point, I get that point. But are you excited about being the father of New Dean or Asher Smith? Are you worried that your whole life is now going to be weekend athletics meets? What I would say is going to be difficult is I've got the first of a competitive dad. Oh no. I got into it. Come on, lift up your feet! technique! No not even that. I don't think I th th th th th th th think I don't think I don't think I don't think I don't th think I don't th thi I don't thi I don't th thi I don't thi thi thi thi thin thin thin thin thin thin thi the the thin' their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm theat. I'm theat. I'm theat theat. I theat. I theat theat theat theat the. I'm their ique! No, not even that. I don't think I'm gonna be bad like that, like on a case. I'm very relaxed like that, I'm quite chilled about that, but I love it when she wins. Do you? Yeah, too much. Too much. Can you imagine how much the other parents hated you? Oh, here comes a bloody comedian. Oh, he thinks he's funny. he he tho thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi tho tho tho tho thi thi thi thi thi thi. I thi. I I I I I I I I I thi. I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I'm thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi oh he thinks he's funny does he? And then suddenly his daughter's fucking Carl Lewis. Unbelievable.

But also, because they're all boys she was up against. And she's massive, I don't realize how tall she was until I saw her. But your daughter? Yeah, and she's so far. You're saying but still is. I reckon Lou's shagging Roger Black or something. There's no way she doesn't look like up up up up up not near enough in the same realm as Dean or Asher Smith of not looking like my daughter with this long lean rangey kid that's far. Massive Lou's been having an affair with Roger Black.

And she was like, oh my God. What's it all? This is going to give it away. What an old reference? Yeah, I know. You should put a million quid on that being me rather than you. But there there th. Lou that. Lou that. Lou that. Lou that. Lou that. Lou that. Lou that. Lou that. Lou that. Lou that. Lew? that. L, that. L, to to to to that. L, to to to that. L, to to to to to to that. that. that. L. that. that that that that that that that that that. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L, th. L. L, th. L, th. th. that, that, that that that that th. that that, that's, that that's, th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. me rather than you. But there we go. Lou might have to go to your daughter. Can you ease off in the races because it's going to reveal who your real dad is? Yeah, basically. But as she was doing it, like the first one, she won quite convincingly, and then it happened with all the rest. And then I was having a bit of a bit of an athlete in your hands there like a bit of joking she did the first one

well and then by the fourth one that she smashed it he was a bit awkward and then one of the last ones that one of the other boys took the lead and the down next to him was like go on I could tell he really wanted it he I could tell you that I just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just the the to the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the other one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one one the other the other the other the the the once you won, he went, yeah, but it's the taking part that counts, yeah, that's what losers say, mate. And that way, you did it. Light work! I was going, light work, yes, light work! Like, but in a joking way, but I think they probably hated me.

Yeah, I think, you know, she did strictly and everyone loved her. So that's what happened with that. We all thought that's where your career was going anyway, so that's good. Yeah. I think you could get on strictly in your own right. You don't need to wait until your daughter's want to go and meddle of the Olympics. I mean, that would be a weird choice, finally. You've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've won, you've th. th. th. th. th. that, that, you're that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thrown. that's thrown. that's th. But the other thing I said to Lou is, Lou cannot watch sport. She gets too invested even if she doesn't care. Yeah, my mom was like that. We couldn't go to Plymouth Hargol with her. She's got too emotional. 100% I'll be watching Arsenal play and she's like, who's like, I'll be watching Arsenal play and she's like, who do you want to win and they're not the reds. And then the th the th th th th the th th th th th th th th th th th th and th the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, the, I, I's, I's tho, I's tho, I's like, thr- tho, I's like, tho, I's th, I's th, I's th, I'm th, I'm th, I'm th, I's tho, I's tho, I's tho, I's tho, I tho, I tho, I th, I th, I tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thu, thu, thu, thr-I's thr-I's thr-I's thrown, thrown, thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, threrererererea, ththey need to win and they're not winning, it's not good is it? I'm like, I think you need help, that's not right. Yeah, Lou, you don't want to support Arsenal, mate. You'll have an awful life. But I said to her, I said, if I said, if one of our daughters does athletics or does

any sport, your life's gonna be hell. Yeah, well, I was looking that way. She shouldn't have shagged Roger Black, Rob. This is all your fault for shagging Roger Black. Roger Black, I've not said that name for years, Roger Black. Bazaar, I was talking about him last week. Not bizarre for you, mate, you love that. You've not spoke about an athlete since 90, 99. I knew Dean of Ashen's thanks, I was 70% confident on her name. And Roger Black's a good looking guy, though. He's a good looking guy. If you go on Roger Black's Goldstone, go on Roger Black's Wikipedia, right?

No, I've been on his, I've been on his website recently, but look at his Wikipedia, just because the photo they've used, he has got the biggest microphone I've ever seen. It looks like he's about be hit by a tennis ball. Can you see it? Yeah, I'm watching it. I'm watching it. It's a photo, you're fucking idiot. I'm watching it. It looks like what happens next. After the break, and then Roger catches it and go,

always an athlete. Oh God, that is a joke. He must have got to be a wind-up. How loud is it? Where are they reporting?? Where are they? Where are they? Where are they? Where are they? they? they? they? they? they? they? they? they? they? they they they they they they they they they they? I th? I th? I thing? I thing? I thing? I thing? I thi? I thi. I thing? I thing? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I? I thing? I? I thing? I thing? I thing? I thing? I thing? I thing? I thing? I thing? I tha? I tha? I tha? I tha? I they tha? I tha? I tha? I tha? I'm tha? I'm tha? I'm tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. I'm watching. I an athlete. Oh God that is inevitable. He must have got to be a wind up. How loud is it? Where are they reporting from? Roger Black's very quiet. I know he's sneaking in my ass when I'm at work. Yeah, he was shagging low upstairs where you were downstairs.

I met someone who told me that they knew Roger Black in the conversation. Okay. Yeah. I wasn't that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's got got got got got got got got got got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got that's got out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out. He's. He's that's that's got. He's got. He's got their their their their their their their their their their their their th. Hea. Hea. He's their their their their their th. Hea. He's th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was thou me that they knew Roger Black in the conversation. Okay. Yeah. I wasn't across Roger Black, so I went on his website. Like, he's got kids, get him on. Yeah, I'd love to get him. He's got more kids than you realize, Rob. He says two on here, but it looks like three from the podium results. So Roger Black, if you're reading his website, yeah. I was reading his website, he's got a website. Yeah, I suppose he's a broadcaster there, isn't I've seen his microphone. This, here we go, you get down to the bit where he talks about Roger Black's fitness equipment range. Oh, yeah. I thought this statistic stuck with me, this can't be true. Roger Black fitness folding and static exercise equipment features in over 250,000 UK homes. No.

Quarter a million people have got a Roger Black treadmill, rowing machine or a cross-trainer. That is not true. It's like the George Foreman, isn't it? Yeah, but I've never met anyone that's got one. They're fairly well priced. Quarter a million people. That can't be fucking true. If anyone listens has got a Roger a small business shout. So it's 300 for an exercise bike, 179 for a t a t a t a t. A t. A t. A t. A t. A tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree treademilacke treademillion treademillion treademillain tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tread tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree tree. A tree. A tree. A tree. A treadmill tree. treadmill treadmill treadmill treadmill tree. treadmill treadmill tree. A 't be fucking true. If anyone listens, it's got a Roger Blight, well it's like a small business shout. So it's 300 quid for an exercise bike, 179 for a folding one, 450 for a proper treadmill. That's pretty, that seems good value.

Yeah, of course they're good value. It's selling a quarter of a million of the fucks. It's only got 70 reviews on trusts on trust, trust, trust, the trust, th, th, that's on that's that's th, that's th, th, it, it, it, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. thi, thi, th. th, th, th, $ $ $40, $40, $1, $1, $1, $1, $ $1. th. thi, $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $0, $0, $0, $0, $0, $0, $0, $0,000.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00, it's $1. It's got 70 reviews on trust pilot. I have bollocks, he sold quarter of a mill. Anyway, I'll tell you what, I bet the Sun journalist listening to this for the Stagdew Gossip is livid that they've wasted 10 minutes on Roger Black. If you see on the front of the Sun a story about Roger Black, fabricating statistics about his sales of treadmills you'll know where they got it from. Roger Black scoop from the parent in Hellpod. Oh God, well how was Glastonbury then we'll do our beef and that was the that was the low down from the sports day that she's really fast.

So the worst thing about coming back from Glastonbury is you're no longer looking forward to glass. Do you know what I mean?? I mean? I mean? I mean? I mean? I mean? I mean? I mean? I mean? I mean? I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean? I mean I mean I mean? I mean I mean I mean I that I that I mean, I that I mean? I didn't I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I I that I I that I I I that I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I mean I th th th th th th thi thi th thi th thi th th th thi th th thi thi th thi thi thi thi thi thi much it had driven me through for the last month of my life through work, if you know what I mean? So that's just been the thing you've been looking forward to and you enjoyed, but now it's like, what's the point? Yeah, exactly. I've had your summer holiday, as well. You've peaked too early, Josh. I know, I've been listening

to is people I want to see at Glastonbury to get myself excited. And I was like, I just don't think I can listen to music again now. I think I'm done with it. I think I have to take a break. How was it though because you haven't been since kids, have you? It was incredible. I haven't been since kids. It seems like it was a good one. So the worst thing about it is when you get back and other people that don't have kids are complaining about how knackered they are. And you're like, mate, you were just sitting at home watching the Glastonary

coverage with a curry on Sunday night. I'm literally, my daughter, I think because we've been away for a few days, we made the mistake of telling her we'd been camping and she wanted to go camping. Absolute fucking error of the highest order. Same after me, my daughter's desperate sky ocean beach. She just loves little orange cups. You just love to meet to me to swash. She just wants to scream well hard at a man that's not been on East Enders for twe twe twe twe twe twa twa twa twa twa the their their their their tip tip tip tip tip tip tip tip tip tip tip to me too swash. She just wants to scream well at a man that's not been on East Enders for 25 years. So it was incredible to go there. It was so good because I just don't remember another time in the last five years where we've had total freedom to do whatever we want.

You know what I mean? That feeling of going, oh we can just get up and do whatever we want. Do you know what I mean? That feeling of going, oh you can just get up and do whatever we want. And that was fun was it? Yeah. Yeah. Rob, you're with all your friends in a field. But what about the people with babies? Did they take their baby? Yeah. How was that? I bumped into another comedian Stuart Goldsmith and he had, what are they? What are they? Six and thin? thr. th. I, I, I, I, I, th, th, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, think they're about the similar age as mine that six and three yeah yeah six and three and they were sat there. He loves all that though he's like a festival bloke. Yeah exactly but I could see it in his eyes Rob I could we were walking through we had our beers we walked past him it was about 6 p.m. Yep and he was sat there in the cafeteria bit backstage, trying to get his kids to eat a baked potato. And I thought, mate, don't pretend this is what you want to be doing. There's no way Glastonbury is fun with children. You are fucking lying to yourself. Yeah. Mate, oh so you're walking away from the pyramid stage after crowded house, right?

Yep. And it's, it's 1999. It was a long old walk, right? We're walking away from the pyramid stage after crowded house, yeah. And it is chocker. So, you know, like, say, you must have been in a situation like you're walking away from a football ground or whatever where it's like... So like, I think a lot of people, if you ever been to Wembley Stadium for a gig, you know when you, because I've been to Glass-Diam,

I know how busy it gets, that little, you know, when they stop you in that Wimbley Way bit by the, because I have to do the tthoroughfare away from which a hundred thousand people are using and I'm like why is the why is the crowd splitting in two and then going back together in a minute? Yeah Moses and we got to that point I looked down and there was a woman sat breastfeeding a six-month hold in the middle of a thoroughfare. Now I'm all for stopping to breastfeed when you need. I'm no lauder, I'm no old school guy, pop your tits away, it's a prior, you know, if you

need to breastfeed, whip them out whenever, no problem. But that feels dangerous. It felt like, yeah, because she was so low. She was, her head's knee height. What, emotionally? No, she was pretending she was loving it. But come on. Everyone with a kid at Glastonbury.

I think that would be Lou's idea of hell. If you had to design a hell for Lou, it would be to breastfeed in public and whilst 100,000 people walked past and also causing a bit of an obstruction. Couldn't she that would shimmie to the side? No, there was no room to shimmy. So she actually on the floor, cross-legged? Yeah. Did she have people protecting her or she's solo? It was difficult to see because the crowd was parting. So in many ways, you know, if you're worried, is there enough privacy in this situation, there couldn't have been more privacy, because you couldn't see anywhere, do you what I mean? She was just like, when you'd to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see, to see, to see, to see, to see, to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see to see, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their, their, their, their, their their their their their their, their the the the the the the the the the the the the the. theat. to see? I. to see, the lyric, and she was there and then you're just like, when you see people, I saw someone with like a very small

baby at Paul McCartney. It's more for them than the kid. I think it's different when the kids are like eight or nine. Well you just think I don't think you need to be here. Do you know what I mean? We didn't go when we had kids, if you want to go fine, but don't go to prove a point that you're enjoying this. But there was people with older kids, like Hilsie was there and his kids are what, 11 and 9 or whatever they are, around that age. And they went to all their bands and they had a really good time. I think that's all. I think th th th th think think think think think think think that's that's that's thi thi that's thi thi thi thi that's thi thi that's thi thi thi that's thi. I that's that's thi. I thi. I that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thoes. I's thoes. I's thoes. I's thi. I's thi. I's thoes. I's thoes. I's thoes. I'm tho. their. I'm their. Yeah. their. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm. their. I'm. tho. that's. I'm. tho.'s when they're like that, but when their babies or toddlers, it's too much.

Like if a 10 year old can stay up later. Stuart Goldsmith said to his kid, I said, oh, what's your favorite? What's your favorite thing been so far? And his kid looked back at me. Shopping! What shopping can you do there? Well, there's like, you know, you can buy, do you know what you can fucking buy, Rob, a bucket hat in a million? You know, it's all that kind of stuff. Yeah. The bucket hats were back, big and then glassy this year, weren't they? You really reinvigorated the bucket out industry single-hand. I just think it coincided then everyone went for it. I should have brought our hat shouldn't I could have made a fortune this summer.

I could have made so much for me. But I was up to three, Rob. Three. I haven't been up to three a three a three a three. Three a times. I was still up at seven because that body clock. How much sleep? You got a the smugness at Glastonbury though. It's a lot of smugness knocking about like, Rob, it's my people.

It's just a little like grin we're at Glastow. Be careful, Rob, because it is fucking Parenting Health and Central at Glastonbury. The stiffnecks are out in force for Parenting How. Yeah, there must have been a trade-off. I did not see one stiff neck for three days in Arbifa. No, I've got a fear. I didn't, do you know what else happened in our Bifah, Josh? I didn't meet a Spanish person in three days.

Apart from the airport, I did not meet one Spanish person in three days. So have you got any other questions about Glastonbury or should we move on to my 600 questions about a stagg to with Dean Gaffney? Go ahead, unless you've got anything else. Unless you've got anything else, have it. Basically, just went there, didn't sleep much, I had a great is when our kids are older like 10 and 11 we should go and get a big like caravan thing and do like live from, we could do like live in Glastonry with the kids. Oh my god yes. But they'll hate us by then and probably tell us to stop doing all the

stories. That's what Jonathan Ross said to me. That's what? their. their. th.. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. When, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. their. their. th. th. th. th. the. the. they. the. they. they. they. their. their. their. the cryptic things. So when, yeah, I used to talk about what my kids did on radio too all the time, and then they got to 12 when you can't use that story, I was livid. I'd get on the radio and going, that's the best story I had. So, oh God. So, you know, until, until, they. I. they. they. they. I. I. the. our tide you were what time you got home and what you had to do child care wise 430 on Sunday PM? PM? Yeah. Totally fucked. Completely exhausted. Just in a really low place and then you're parenting. Parenting. I don't know why it makes you laugh and you call it parented. Just right. That's what it is. I know that's on it. I know that's. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's what. That's what. That's on. That's on. That's on. That's what it. It's on. It's on. It's on. It's on. It's on. It's on. It's on. It's on. It's on. It's on. It's on. It's on. It's on. It's on. It's on. that's on. that's on. that's on. that's. that's. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to to to to to to to do. I to to do. I to to to to do. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to then you're parenting and then... Parenting? I don't know why it makes you laugh when you call it parented. That's what it is. I know that's what it is. But it's like you sometimes talk about it when you like you talk about doing a certain gig. You know you're on the last leg. You know when you're parenting. It sort of slots. Oh, that explains it.

None of whom allow me to understand who the real me is. About that? If this is therapy, I have, I've got you. I'm the therapist, bang, it took, what, two years, we got it. You divide your life up for the different versions of you. Exactly. And that's the problem because you never know who you are and what you're doing. Exactly Rob. And then if those worlds cross over you panic, you don't know who you need to be. Exactly. Am I the man drinking a frozen cocktail in the field watching crowded house? Or am I the guy at the home proming his, in his daughter that he'll camp with her in the garden to make up for the fact that they weren't camping without without without without without without without without without without without without without without without without the they the they they the fact.. they're the fact. they're the fact. the fact. the fact. I. I the fact. I the fact. the fact. the fact. they're the fact, they're they're they're they're they're their the fact the fact, they're they're they're they're they're they're they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th the. the. the. the. theeeean theean thean thean thean they they they the. Maybe pick one version. You can't pick one version.

I was definitely a different version myself on the stag. Actually, I would say that in a way, the great thing about having kids is that when you get back, you have got something to come back to that you're really looking forward to. Do you know what I mean? Yes. Yes. Coming back to sit and watch more Glaston Recoverage or coming back to, do you know what I mean? There's, you're like, oh this thing I've really missed, so that gives you a kind of... Yeah, I missed a girl so much on the stag do. Really did miss him and like, especially because it's such a, I've been for such a sort of a debauched place. It's basically drugs, house music and sex, you know me, I hate sex. And, and th. And it, and you and you and you and you. And it, th. to to to to to to to to to their their their their their their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, there's their, their, their, their, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's the, there's the, the, there's there's the. Oh, there's the. Oh, there's there's there's there's the, there's there's the, there's there's like so hedonistic out there that all you want to do is come back and sort of just cuddle your kids and allow on the sofa and be normal.

But I'm glad you had a good time. Well, let's hear about, let's hear about Ibitha. Because we knew you were going on a stag do.. Yeah and I didn't want to say it was his in case he was trying to keep it quiet. However considering he did not keep it quiet neither did I so it was in the paper anyway. So they flew out at like 8 a.m. from from Stansdain and I flew out afternoon from City Airport because I wanted to to go to Sports Day so I didn't want to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be that I to to be to to to to that I to to to to to to that I to to the to to to to the to to the to to the to to to to the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the try. try. the the sports sports the sports the sports the sports the sports the sports the sports to sports to sports to sports to sports to sports to sports to sports to sports to sports day. to be that dad that Miss Sports Day for a stag do. Yeah, yeah, you couldn't be that guy. No. Particularly when you've got the Michael Johnson of Sports Day who's sweeping up the awards. Yeah, of course. You want to be there for the big, you know, if she was shit I wouldn't have gone.

But I'm joking. I'm joking. How many people were on the stag. their. And was. Were. Were. Were. Were. Were. Were. Were. Were. Were. Were. Were. Were. Were. Were. Were. Were. Were the names. Were the names. Were the names. Were. Were the names. Were. Were the names. the names. the names. the names. the names. the names. the names. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. the. thanks. thanks. thanks. thanks. thanks. thanks. the. the. the. the. the. the the.that's the fact he wasn't on the stack. We'll get into Gaffney in a minute. Oh, Gaffney wasn't on the stack? No, he just turns up. He was just there. He wasn't hired like the wheeledstone raider, was he? No.

This was what happened. I flying out on my own, and I knew they were battered because they'd been sending any messages so I went to Stansted and I got there really early so I thought it might be busy actually it weren't busy at all so I sat in a bar and I had two pints of lager but I hadn't had breakfast or lunch on your own on my own absolutely fucked out my head I went to this bar on the corner it was like a brewery type place in the airpool and I had had these these these these these these these th th th th th th th th th th the they they they I had had had had had had had th th th th th thee th thee thee th had had thried thried thried thried thried thried the the thrown I had thried thried thried thried th. their their their their to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th to to th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the I was I was I was the the the the to the to to thrown to thrown thrown try try try the try the the the thrown to to to to to to to to to to to these like weird beers that were like 5% I didn't realize I got so pissed because I hadn't eaten anything. Then I had to have a panic prep and then I was stumbling about nearly missed my flight left my phone in the toiler. Oh my god. On two pints I was like I'm gonna die here. This is the I haven't even got there yetthen there's not enough bus drivers in our

Bifer airport. So basically I nearly missed my flight home as well because I was waiting it got delayed an hour because there's not enough buses to take you to the planes. The planes are all there on time but because there's shortage of staff everywhere. So I got to the gate and I give my passport and boarding car this is on the way home. Where's your mask I went the the the the the the they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they they. they's they's they. they's th. they's th. they's th. I'm th. I'm they. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm the. I'm the. I's the. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I's is. I's is. I's is. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. th. th. they. they. they. th. th. they. th. th. the. th. thea. thea. t t t t t t t t t t tea. I'm they. I'm the the way home. He went, where's your mask? I went, oh I haven't got one, do they have one? Because you don't need a mask anywhere in Spain or in England. I went, oh if they got one on the plane, he went, you need one for the bus, you need one for the terminal to the plane. Yeah. And I was like, oh come on mate, that Come on. Oh that would have talked him round. I'm so tired. I'm like, come on mate.

I used my hand? He was like, no. And I was like, okay, but could I run alongside? So now I'm going from my bag trying to find the one that I had on the plane on the way out, because you, on the way out you need a mask, because you're, because you're, because you're, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, the, to, to, the, the, to, the, to, the, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, to, to, come, to, come, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, come, to, to, to, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, to me, come, come, come, come, come, come, to, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, come, to me, to Spain. What are they going to do? Just leave you on the runway? Well I know back in the terminal. So then I'm like, I couldn't remember seeing a mask in any of the shops because no one fucking wears masks anymore, do they? Yeah, no. And then luckily someone found one in the queue come through so I went to the ta. So I went to their tau. I had to walk down a corridor, the, to. the, the, I. the, I. the, I'm, their, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm their, I've their, I've their mask, their their their their their their their their their their their their their mask, I've their mask, I've their mask, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, their mask, their mask, fa, fa, fa, fa, fa, fa, fa, fa, fa, fa, fa, fa, fa, fa, fa, fa, fa, their mask, their mask, their mask, their mask, their mask from Spain to England. So I got there late and then I'd slept on the plane. So I had slept for two hours on the plane, right? Get there late. Two pints and he's out like a bloody light.

I know it's such a dad, right? And anyway, and then I go, I get a taxi taxi to go, I get a to night, not nightclub, kind of, what's it called Beach Club? Well it is, I thought it was like an expensive, exclusive, like, posh beach club. It's not. It's basically a nightclub in the day. Yeah. I walked in at 8 o'clock, people have been there since midday. Everyone is absolutely fucked out of their red Josh. Yeah, and I'm in the only one with my top on still, thoom on, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, is, is, is, is, is, is thi, it, is tho, is, is, is th, it's th, it's tho, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, is tho, is tho, is tho, is, is thi, is thi, is thi, is, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is thi, is tho, is tho, tho-a, tho-a'' is tho-a' is tho' is tho-a' is like, tho-ishishishishishish, like, like, like, I'm the only one with my top on still, everyone's got the top off. Right? How are you sober at this?

But have you sobered up? Yeah, completely sober. I walk in and it's an ocean beach is, it's a bit like a Game of Thrones brothel but outside. Okay? I've not seen Game of Thrones. It is fucking bananas, right? Everyone is absolutely shit-faced. They're all sweating, they're all drunk, they're all, there's like people walking through burnt, but like third-degree burns that they'll have

everyone's English. Everyone's English. I'd quickly changed my top and I'd even had a share, I was still a bit smelly from the plane, but I've put a bit of after. You've got your suitcase with you at this the suitcase. No, no, no, I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I dropped their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. thirty thirty, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, th. th. But, th. But, th. th. th's, th's, thi, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th go out because I thought I was going to an exclusive fancy place. I was like I'll put me nice top on, turn up everyone's just like in pants. Everyone's just in their pants. It looks like toddlers in the garden with a paddling pool. Right? But shit-faced. And I'm walking through and I can't get through because there are all no Joe Swashes there. Now I've turned up and I'm todn't to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the to to to the the to to the the to to the the the the to the the the the to the the the the the the the the the the to the the the the their. the the their. their. their. their. their. their. their their. their their. their their their. their their their their their their just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just. their. their. their. their. their. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm just. I'm. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm off to tell and there was a one point I'm trying to walk from it is everyone is bedlam everyone's so close to each other I can't get through in the end. There wasn't a woman breastfeeding on the floor was there only absolutely oh yeah she yeah but not to her child. Plenty of that going on and I'm trying to walk through right and this woman wo'n't th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and I th and I went went went went went went went went went went the they. And they they went I they went I'm they went I'm they're they're th. And th. And I'm thin isn't tho. I'm their wasn't the isn't their wasn't their wasn't their wasn't their wasn't their wasn't their wasn't their wasn't their wasn't isn't isn't isn't isn't isn't isn't isn't isn't their isn't their wasn't their wasn't their wasn't their wasn't wasn't wasn't wasn't wasn't wasn't wasn't they wasn't they wasn't they. I wasn't they wasn't isn't isn't isn't they weren't they weren't they weren't you they're they're they're they're not thin thus. I thus. I'm thin there the. I'm there the. I'm thean't you there the. I'm the. I'm not they. I'm not they're not thean and push me, she was my eye and size. She was a, she was a solid woman, right? And I'm trying, I'm just trying to get to my mate, I'm trying to walk past, she pushes me again. You know that, that gaming gladiators, we have to run through

them. Yeah, it's like that. It's like that. She was so- She was so-but I had to go back and I had to go to go to go back. I had to nice clothes. I mean by going out nice clothes. And you're sober at this stage. Completely sober and everyone's just like on top of me. And then there are people all want photos but they're all so pissed and it's like draping yourself on you. This girl wanted a photo and she lent into me and her leg went on to mine because I got a shorts on and I literally felt where she's been there about a week and not shaved anymore, the stubbly legs going down my leg and I was nearly physically sick. Everyone's stinks, everyone's got little white bits in the corner of their mouth, everyone's tongue's a luminous yellow.

And they, about, why are the tongue's a luminous yellow? Because they just been drinking shit and no water. And then they're going, about eight thap, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, everyone's thi, everyone's thi, everyone's thi, everyone's th, everyone's th, everyone's th, everyone's th, everyone's th, everyone's th, thi, thi, everyone's thi, everyone's thi, thi, thi, everyone, thi, everyone, thi, thi, everyone, thi, everyone, everyone, thi, everyone, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, everyone's, thi, thi, everyone's, everyone's thi, everyone's thi, everyone's thi, everyone's was like, what's going on here? But I realised I'm the only one that doesn't stink of piss and shit. They all just stink of sweat and sun cream. Anyway, so I got, we all left because they were so pissed. I arrived with one person being escorted out, they're truc, right? I walked out. And I go in and then they're all drunk, they're all drunk. Let's all the thrown. And then, and then, and then, and then, and they're all they're all they're all they're all they're all they're all they're all drunk. And they're all drunk. And they're all drunk. And they're all drunk. And they're all drunk. And they're all drunk. And they're all drunk. And they're all, we're all drunk. And they're all, we're all, we're all, we're all, we're all, we're all, we're all, we're all, we're all, we're all, we're all, we all. We all, we all. We all, we all, we all. And they're all, we all, we all, we all, we all. And, we all, we're all, we're all, we're all, we're all. And, we're all, we're all, we're all. And, we're all, we're all, we're all, we're all, we're all drunk. And, we're all th. th. th. th. th. th. th. We're all all, we're all all th. We're all th. We're all, we're all all, we're all, we're all, we're all, we're all, we're allthen we go to leave and then we walk back. So you don't even get to have a drink at this stage? Oh mate, no, at one point I asked for a, I just said, can I have a cold beer please? To like this waitress, because I didn't know what was going on with the drinks. There's bottles of vodka, oh my god is mental. Anyway so I left. So I left with him the today. the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. No th. No th. No th. No th. No th. No th. No tho. No tho. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. I. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I the the tho. I tho. of the group and then we end up going KFC and I had a I have some KFC. I've flown to Spain to go to KFC I had it two nights running mate

Oh my word I tell I say I didn't see a Spanish person it's like Magaloof I thought was a bit more exclusive but I went to San Antonio yeah and I think I thi and I think I to I to I to to to to to to th I th I th I th I th I th I thin I thin I thin I thin I thin I thin I thin I thin I thin I thin I thin I th. I th. I th. I to thin I thin I to to to the to the to to the the to the to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th I've I've I've th I've th I've th. I've th. I've th. I've thin I've thin I've thin I've thin I've to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to them back to the hotel. What time are we at now? About 9 p.m. So, no, it's about 9 o'clock. Anyway, we get it, and then it takes an hour to get them all home. Get them home at 10 o'clock. I've had two beers before the flight, at 10 a.m. Oh my God, Rob. So I've had 11 hours sleep. You've had 11 hours sleep on a stagged it. Yeah, I wake up to a load of messages. I went to bed 11, they all messaged again

and went back out at 1 a.m. Till six. What do you mean? They went to bed and then got back up? the interval. Yeah, yeah. So I had 11 hours sleep. I'll wake up, they're all dead to the world, so I started writing the book. I did a chapter of the book. I did a chapter of the book. No, but I started, no, I'm nearly there now. So I woke up, I got a coffee, sat up a the balking, I wrote a chapter the book, wrote a chapter, I, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, I, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, I the book, wrote a chapter, I wrote, I wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote a chapter, wrote, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote a chapter, wrote, wrote a chapter, wrote, wrote, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, a chapter, I book, I book, wrote, I, wrote, a to midday, I'm like, this is unbelievable. And then they all wake up and then we went to another bar and then sat around a pool, and we sat around a pool all day.

This is really nice. That's when Gaffney turned up. Nice guy Gaffney, basically, heathny. Basically, he's out in Arbue. on. I'd happily get Dean Gaffney on, happily get Dean Gaffney. Both 25, one of these rules of life will never get of a girl younger in his daughters, good man. Um, oh my God. It's, he told me that like he was some sort of conquering hero. You know, like a bit of a... We've both got that rule to be fair, haven't we? I'm too fair, actually. That is one of the best things I've that is one. That is one. That is one. that. that. that. that. th. th. th. th. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be............a. to be...a. to be...a. to be to be to bea. to bea. to bea. to bea. to bea. to bea. to be...... Oh, to be... Oh, to me. to me. to me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the to the the the. things I've ever heard. He's a lovely bloke though Dean. He's a really nice bloat. He's a lovely, he's known Joe from years ago, so we just sort of turned up.

But that's what I beefers like. It's a bit like an 18 to 30s, but for older people, that they all know each other, blah, you met, th is Sunday, right? So on the Saturday, I ran the pool day, and I say, look, I can't go, look, I'll get to, so Saturday, we sat around a pool, and then we went to, oh mate, this place, called Cafe Mambo's or Mint Lounge or whatever, it's where you sit and have dinner, and you look out at the sun than the sun, and the sun, and the sun, the sun, the sun, the sun, th and the sun, th.., th., that, that, that, the sun, that, that, that, the sun, that, that, to the to to to to the sun, so, the to to to to to to to to to to, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the to, the to, to, I's, to, to, I's, to, to, I's, to, to, to, to, I's, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so sets everyone claps. No. Don't all that. I'd

say 50 women doing little heart fingers and someone trying to take a photo through the fingers of the sun. But they're all looking at it like it don't happen every fucking night. Yeah. I'm just like I've seen the sun go down. Yeah and if you miss it, you've got a chance every day. Yeah, of course. I mean, and anywhere. Was it a particularly good sunset? Yeah, but not one that was exclusive to the restaurant.

No, no, no. It wasn't like a commissioned sunset from fucking Cafe Mumbo's, anyway. So we did that, then and we went to another bar and then again I drunk loads water and I tapped out about midnight. They stayed out to about 6 in the morning again because they're just a bit more hardcore than me. So I went back to bed at midnight. How was it taping out of Stagdo?

Did you feel, did you feel like, did you feel like a conquering hero? I just went home now now. So like Joe Swash blessed him like it was all in the paper like him having this dog do. He was drunk but he weren't going too mad. He was sat there and he was sitting at that restaurant every time like parents walked past he's got a little baby called Rose who's about a year because he was going oh that baby we looked like rose and stuff like that and in the paper it's like and in the paper it's like Joe Swash talks to bloans. the blonde the blonde blonde the blonde the blonde the blonde the blonde the blonde the blonde the blonde the blonde the blonde the blonde the blonde that's the blonde the blonde the blonde that's that's the blonde the blonde the blonde their that's their that's that's that's that's that's that's their that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's was that's was that's was that's was that's was that's was that's was that's was that's was was yeah, he was doing all that. But what's quite funny, seeing I'd be for people that have been when they were young, going back with their kid, and it's not the same. It was very much like Glastowy kids.

They were just walking past, going, I wish I was sat at that restaurant doing heart fingers, but I've got my baby. Because I've got my place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place place a place place place place a place place place a place place place a place a place a place place a place a place a place a place a place. I just think go there if you're young or if you want to get a pissed up, but just go to some real. Just go to center parks. Or the other side of the island, you don't need to go to San Antonia, it's just proper party. Everyone's quite young there as well, so it's not much to do for kids. And so did you have a third night out? that's a good innings. Yeah I'll been on cocktails I've had shots I've been drinking I mean catching up vodka you know been drinking that for 12 hours but I don't know about you but after 12 hours a

drinking I'd quite like to go to sleep. Yeah so I walked home when a bed bed it's fell asleep at night. to the the night. So I the night. So I the night. the night. th. I I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I was I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was thoes. I was thi thin tho' tho' th. I've th. I've been drinking th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th th th th th thin. I've thin. I've thin. I've thin. I've been thin. I've been tote tote tote tote tote tote tote tote tote tote tote. I've been tote. Gosh. Right? You need more sleeping one night than I had in three at Gloucesterbro. Yes. Guess what happened to next day? No one's up. Another chapter done. Oh, love. I'm flying, Josh. It's like a writer's retreat. Who knew? Who knew that Joe Sw? Was the key to open up my creativity? I loved that you brought the laptop.

You knew! Well, I just thought, if there's a couple of hours in the morning, and I was no way I was staying out till 6 a.m. drink, I just, I physically couldn't Josh. So what happened? Then, what happened? Then, then, the Sunday, we woke up sitting around that pool. So I was like, look at the ads, I ain't going ocean beach again, it was too much. I did have to have a lot of photos there and it was quite full on. I was like, there's no way I'm going back to ocean beach. I have a good one. It's not really my scene, it's too much. Anyway, so it's midday again. I want to start a today. So I drink a bottle of rosa on my own, 12 till 1 o'clock,

like we're going Ocean Beach, I'm like, yeah, I'm in, straight away, immediately. Not even like, just because I got pissed. Because you had sent me a voice note that ended with the words, I'm not going to Ocean Beach. Yes, and about 12 hours later I he's not going to Ocean Beach. And they said, I bet he will be. And I was like, it's not really his thing actually. The next thing I know, there's a screen grab of you and Wayne Linnock on Instagram. Yeah, so basically what happened was I got a bit drunk and I also didn't really want

to to take my top off, Josh. Yeah, have you ever the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th tho tho tho tho tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, that- thatr-I thatrown tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi, I thi, I thi. I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that didn't want to have to take my top off Josh. Have you ever taken your top off at a party? Of course I haven't. No, so you sort need to be drunk enough to go topless don't you? Why do you need to take your top off? Because it's really hot and it's sunny and it makes it hotter? No it's all right. It's all. it's all. It's so it's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's all. It's the their their to to to to to to to be drunk. It's to be drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's to be drunk. to be drunk. to be drunk. to be drunk. to be drunk. It's to be drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's drunk. It's to. It's drunk. It's then people wanted photos and I started people taking photos of my top off Josh and putting them on the internet. Oh no. That's not nice is it. I was like don't, oh I don't, I don't know, I don't want to put my top on for the photos then that looks really pathetic. One second. But actually in defense of Ocean Beach, that the to the tooom. to be so I I I I I I I I I I I I's thin, thin, thiiopopopse, thiop of thiop of thiop of the thi. the the, I's the thease the thease their to to their their to thoom, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I I's they. Oh, I's they. Oh, I's they. Oh, I's they. Oh, I's they. Oh, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,the music's playing and it's not a big event, it's like quite a mad thing to experience, but then when it got to six o'clock, everyone started getting too drunk and I'm out of it. Because it is just like full of people getting drunk and getting off of each other and like it don't, like if you had a good angle, you could have made it look like I was doing some terrible things when all I was doing they were just sitting staring at the floor panicking.

And then I left at 6 o'clock and then I went home and then I went back to the hotel. But then I bumped into another bloke off the stag who was tired and didn't want to go to ocean beach and then we went out for dinner and had a nice dinner but is the funniest story of the stag right so how long did you know? I met him once before and stuff but I don't go in too many details about who it was on the stag but basically we was out for dinner and he was saying oh my mrs is fuming with me and I was like why went well she's got the um because basically all the photos of the stag and all my Instagram story and all my Instagram stories have been in the paper the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th I the the th I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. the's the's the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the was was the is is the is the is the is the is the. the. te toge is toge is toge is the the the the the the the the the th him because in these photos of him at Ocean Beach surrounded by all these women in bikinis, he didn't have his wedding ring on. And he was sat the game, but I swear I didn't take it off, I don't know what, I'll never

do that, that's not me. And then I explained to him that on Instagram, when you film sometimes it, mirror, flips it on your hand, so that your left, their, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, and they, so, so, so, some, some, some, some, some, some, some, some, some, some, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, and they, and they, and they, and they, and they, and they, and they, and I, and I, and I, and I.... So, so, and I. So, so, so, so, and I's, so, so, and I's, so, and I's, so, and I'm, so, and I'm, and I'm, so, so, so, taph. So, so, so, so, some, some. they. they. they. they. they. Oh my word okay so because I said to him look look this was at dinner your watches on the other hand you went oh fuck I went yeah it flips it didn't you know. Oh my god this is like this is like this is like Jonathan Creek yeah yeah thrown the other problem is I went to just that The other problem is I bought loads of shots for everyone when I was drunk and he spent about three, four hundred quid on shots, right? Whoa, how much is a shot? I don't know, but I think he was battered and he kept on buying them for everyone. So basically he's got charged like 300 quid or $300 quid, but it's their th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thii, thi, thi, thi, thi, thr-and, thr-so, thrown, thr-so, thr-so, thrown, thr-a, thr-a, th, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thr-a, thr-a, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, wow, woe, thr, thr, thr, thr, thr-a, thrown, thrown, and, thrown, and, thrown, and, thrown, and, thrown, thro, and, thro, thr-a, thr-a, thr quid, but it doesn't say the name of the bar or nightclub. It just says like, I'm making this name up, but like, say Carmel-Sanchez. Right?

So it's just come up 300 quid to this Spanish woman. And she's going spare because when you Google this name, I'm not going to say the real name, but this name, on Instagram, basically comes up what I'll describe as an Instagram porn star. So why is that the name? So it's basically a woman in bikini like just posing in Ibifa. So very much... This is the worst story ever. So if you're at home and you're the wife, heartwag girlfriend and you see no wedding ring on the finger but you don't understand Instagram and the mirror mirror flip. Easy situation to get yourself in the wife, height of her girlfriend, and you see no wedding ring on the finger but you don't understand Instagram and the mirror, mirror flip. Easy situation to get yourself into.

She's done nothing wrong here. I'm on her side until it's explained. You also see the Spanish person's name and what, you know, 300 quid. sohn, right? So he's now going, who's this woman? Have I been scammed? What's because he didn't do anything? He's done nothing wrong because I was with him.

I put him into his room. He's done nothing wrong at tall. Then I work it out because he looked at the thing when I recognize her though. I think she was the shot girl at the tribeau buy the drinks from the venue and they sell you the drinks at whatever price they want to sell you them. And then I don't know if it's true, I allegedly this is what, with some eyes and I think that's what it is. So they buy the shots in some bars and I don't know which bars and I don't know which

the bars and I don't know which bars it was. I don't want to say it was where it was because I don't know where it was and but I worked it out that basically what they do is they buy off the venue they go around selling it and then they use their card machine for you to pay yeah yeah oh my god that's that is an it looks like he's basically given a woman 300 quid for God knows what and took his wedding ring off but it's just the mirror flip and he's brought shots directly. That is incredible and did it clear it up Rob? Yes it did because I messed his missus explaining and then she text me black bless her saying hi hi Rob sorry to ruin your evening I feel so silly my evening it's been one of the best dinners I've ever had. This is incredible.

You've made Josh's week. As you went, sorry if I ruined your evening, I got a bit, and also, bless him, because if you're seeing all these stories in the newspaper and stuff, going, I didn't really understand what was going on and now it's been explained. I feel so silly. But like, I felt a bit like Jonathan Creek when I explained it, his eyes lit up. Because he knew he'd done nothing wrong, but everything was suggesting he had. Yeah, of course. What a situation for him to do. I know, it was funny, wo'er.

Oh, that was great. And they really good lads, and they were, it was funny. And then they went on until like six in the morning, tha, to morning, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, to, to, to, like, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, but, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, but thi, but thi on their flight to Stansted. You got home Monday night? I got on Monday afternoon about six o'clock. Oh my word. And how much can you complain about that kind, like about being napped? I suppose you're not, I suppose you're not. Four great nights sleep. I've had a 30 hours sleep in three nights. Oh my God. I feel unbelievable. And you've written half a book? I've been a real good few days for me. It's unbelievable. I think it's the most peak of our different lives that I'm at Glastonbury. When I was in the Ocean Beach show, like I felt a bit out of place because it is quite geysery and like Essex is, a bit towy and all that.

And I'm sort of all right in those don't think anyone else is there anymore. It's gone quite mainstream, like whenever a song come on with lyrics, people are buzzing. Rather just like everywhere you go though in I-biff you did it here. And all like I think was I'd love to watch Josh here. Well you know I've been on a stagdue do do do do do do do do do do stague do stague do stag do stag do stague do to to to to tho. I've th. I've. I've. I've. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'd to watch. I'd to watch. I'd to watch. I'm I'd to watch. I'd to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I's is th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I'm th. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm thin. I'm th. I'm th. I'm the. I'm thin. I'm th. I'm the. I'm the. I'm th. I'm th wrong? A few hours? Ocean Beach? Yeah, I've been to a stag doing Ibith and we did a few hours in the day at Ocean Beach. Yeah, because it's quite an experience. It wasn't at peak Ocean Beach. Yeah, because actually between midday and six, it was just a really lovely chilled beach but... Yeah. Yeah, like Ivo Graham bought a board game. What, two Ocean Beach? Yeah. But it's fairly chilled, but it went from like six o'clock till 10 o'clock at night,

or midnight whenever it shuts. Well, it's basically a club that starts at midday rather than at like 8 o'clock at night. So if you went, if you turned up sober to a nightclub at 3 a.m. What time does it close? I think about midnight? Right. I don't th don't thoen, I don't thoen, I don't tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tho, tho, tho, tho, thi. Well, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th. Well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well. Well, well. Well, well. Well, it's, it's, well. Well, it's, it's, it's, it's, well. Well, it's, it's, well. Well. Well, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, well. Well. Well, it's, it's basically, it's basically, it's basically, it's basically, it's basically, it's basically, it's basically, it's basically, it's basically, it's basically, it's basically, it's basically, it's basically, it's basically, it's basically, it's basically, that. Well, it'ser does it? No, I don't know he doesn't. She doesn't stop. No. There was a few Parent and Health fans that come over. Was there? But yeah, a bit like.

Not as many as at Glastonbury, No, there was a lot of people asking me if I was a tick-toc end because it was a bit like non-stop and I sat around the pool one day and his pissed mum come over she was about 50 she was part of a hendou so many hendees and stagg this actually battered and I was laying on a on a sunbed she said you're right do you mind if I'll lay it with you I went yeah I do and then she lay down on me and I and I got up and I went fuck off and I'm 't want a 50-year-old woman laying on me. Do you know what I mean? If I'm going to get, you know, I don't want that. So I was a bit rude and I sort of just went, yeah, I'm gonna,

and I was slagging people off at the sunset place. The lads were giving me shit going, because I was just, but I can't help it. I'm thaghatthea. I'm a the the thau. I'm thagh. I'm thage. I'm thin. I'm thin. I'm thin. I'm thin't thin't thin't thin't thin't thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm going, I'm going, I'm going, I'm going, I'm going, I'm going, I'm going. I'm going. I'm going. I'm going. I'm going. I'm going. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm a th. I'm a th. I'm a th. I'm a th. I'm a thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thin. I'm going. I'm going. I'm going. I'm going. I'm going. I'm going. I'm going. thin. tha. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. th th th th th th th th th th th thia. th th th th th th I think that's why I'm a comedian. You just, I go against the crowd. Whatever everyone likes, I don't really like to be honest, apart from football, I'll go with the crowd. Anyway, it was fun though, and I slept loads and wrote loads a book. That is, it is a stagged two halves really, wasn't it? Do you know what? Because they were so up for it, it actually allowed me chance to slip off. If their, if, if, if, their, to, their, to, to, to, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, to, their, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, their, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tho, I. tho, I's tho, I's thoooooooooooooo, I thooooooooooooooo, I thoo, I's tho, I's, I's the to stay with. But because I was going halfway through, I was like, I'm done, lads. But I just couldn't go on for that long. Two hours sleep on the plane. Eleven hours sleep first night. Yeah. Ten hours sleep second night.

Incredible scenes. Also as well, on the plane, I slept for two hours. But listening to these Michael Celito a be for Zen. Yeah, of course. And yet, it ended the towar Beach and I went very much. You go to Ocean Beach and meet with me and with D'Gaffney. From Zen to Yen, because it is not cheap. It was great fun. Oh, well, it's been, I'd say that's it now for my, for my summer jinks. You.

. No, I've, I, I, I, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It, that, that, it, th. It, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, th. It, it, it, it, it, it, it, th. It, th. It, th. It, th. It, th. It, th. It, th. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's, th. It's, th. It's, thi. It's, thi. It's, t tha. It's, thi. It's, tha. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's, it's to grease. But that's with family. Oh yeah, so like not not solo jinx, no more solo jinx for me. No. No, maybe not I don't know. That's it now until until the... Till when? So what have you got to look forward to? What have you got to look forward to? Because you haven't got anything now, you need to think of something. I haven't got a family holiday. You're going to camp in the garden the garden the garden the garden the garden the garden the garden the garden the garden. You're to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to be so. to to to to to tooom. their. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their. their. their their their their their their toooooooooooooooooooo. their. I. their tooooo. too. too. to to too. to camp in the garden with a dog, sir? Yeah, I mean, come on now. I've got a tent you could borrow, but. No, I've got work, I've got that. I've got nothing in my diary that I would file under fun rather than work until I turn 40 next April. And do you know what? The sad thing of that is, you're not lying. I need to book something in.

I. You need to book something in. I've got the England games in November. Does that count? Not really. Christmas? November? I think you need to book something. You might have a little weekend away with you. Also, it's hard though to have a weekend away with a one-year old, in it? Yeah. In many ways going to go into Wittsville was a real lesson in how nice it is it is in our own house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house house th house th house th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi to thi to to to to to to to to to to to thi, I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th th th th th th years, yeah, maybe just abstain from fun and accept you're not going to have that,

yeah, until your youngest is older. I think that's what I'm going to do, yeah. Yeah, I think that's the best way because you can't force it. No, exactly. I'm going to the, oh my god, I said that with excitement in my voice. Go on go on. I. I. I. I. I. I go. I go. I go. I go on that. I go on that. I go on that. I go on that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that. I that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that that th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi thi. I thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi that that until on Saturday. Oh dear, you'll be alright. What a life. What a life. Quick small business shout out. Quick small biz shout out. Dear Rob and Josh, myself and my partner love listening to your podcast. Thank you so much for all the laughs.

I wondered if you could give my dad's business a shoutout. It's opened in the last year and everyone involved has worked really hard on it. It's the secret the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I'll. I'll. I'll. th. to. to. to. to. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I's. I. I's. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. t. t. t. t. t. t. true. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t.... involved has worked really hard on it. It's called the Secret Farm and is in Mogger Hanger, Bedfordshire. It's a pick your own fruit farm with lots of activities for all the family including a beach. Mogher hangar on sea. Complete with palm trees, play tractors, often the real ones, and food slash, bar. A really affordable fun day out for everyone. Just book a ticket online. It's the secret dot farm on Facebook it's the secret farm the dot secret dot farm that's quite cool don't it that's good isn't it I'm

try to look at it but oh yeah look at that pick your own fruit that be fun oh that would be nice that's the kind of entertainment I need Rob you need that some wholesome stuff yeah farm to farm entertainment that's that's that's th that's th that's th th that's th that's th that's that's th th th th that's that's th th that's th th that's th th that's th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tho tho tho tho tho tho thooooooooooooooooooooooooo the the the the the the the the the the stuff. Yeah wholesome stuff. Farm to Farm entertainment that's what you want. Exactly. It'd be like my childhood won't it? Farm to plate, farm to heart, farm to heart. It feels like a slogan. I'll work on it. I'll work on it. You work on it. Why don't you go away to Ibitha, you'll have hours to work on it. Yeah I'll keep tell him. Yeah you you you you you the way you you the way the way you the way the the the the their their their to that you you that you that you to that you to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their. their. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. the. their their their their their the. I their their the. I their their the. I that. I'll. that's that's th. th. I keep telling that, Lou, I've got a new book deal. I'm going to go to my Bifer for a month. See you later. Maybe that's just what Dean Gaffney's doing. He's pending his memoirs. I've come back, Lou, with 10,000 words and regret. But I'm here.

And it's been productive. OK, right, we'll see you on Friday for a guest episode.