Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S12 EP15: Instinct Takes Over

Episode Date: February 24, 2026

More misadventures in parenting, life, and beyond with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe... Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Please subscribe and leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: [e-mail] Follow us on instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@parentinghell⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This episode is presented by Vauxhall. So Josh, News UK have voted the new Vauxhall Frontera as the value car of the year 2025. Rightly so. And do you know why I can say that, Rob? Why? And you know this, I've test driven one. Oh yeah, and I've been test passenger.

I got to drive the Frontera. Fools. A, the tech was so good, right, that it was just simple. I felt like it was my car the moment we were moving. Yeah? We had loads of bootroom, you saw that. Oh, I had a little peek in the back. back. I was thinking this is perfect for a family. It was spacious. It was easy to use. And do you know

what as well? No offense. I wasn't too near you. No, no exactly. There's so much space in the front. I didn't feel like I was touching you. I couldn't smell you. It was great. It's available in electric. It's available in petrol hybrid. The electric is cheaper. It is available from 23, 995 pounds. Ah, that sounds like value to me, Josh. That's great value. Great value. Top value. Do what I did, Rob. Test drive the new Vauxhall Front. Today. Discover more by searching Vauxhall Frontera online. Hello, you're listening to Parent in Hell with... Willow, can you say Josh Whittacom?

What? Willow. Can you say Rob Beckett? Or... Gopsy! And can you say producer Michael? Good girl. There we go. She really dropped the ball on producer Michael, didn't she? Yeah. What happened there? She absolutely now had the rest.

Well, this is my daughter, Willow. Having a go at your name, She's 30 months and our feisty second child. She really seems to enjoy saying Rob Beckett. We are from Parkgate on the Whirl. And my partner introduced me to your podcast when we had our first in lockdown. We've both been listeners ever since. I always feel reassuring hearing other parents

who don't have all the answers, but are giving everything their best shot. Thanks for the belly laughs. Please never stop. Steph. Don't have the answers. I know. The research we put in to the advice we give on this show

is second to everyone else that does that kind of thing. Too right. Too right, Rob. I've got some bloody answers. Give me a question. I'll give you an answer. Can I show you a video that I saw on Instagram, Rob? Is it if you danced at Radio 2?

No. But we can cover that. I'm sure we will. I obviously don't say who this is because it's people in the public eye, Rob. Well, if they're in the public eye, then they're open for discussion. Okay. But you don't want to be perceived as gossiping about them? No, I think we should get them on.

Right. Because I'm going to say it, it didn't chime exactly with my experience of parenting. Okay, right. We can say who it is. I've met these two. They're lovely. They're lovely.

He's lovely. I've met Joe. He's Joe Sugg and Diane Buswell. Yeah. Now, he's painting what I would call 10 out of 10 level of accuracy in Dungarees, whilst building a cart, hugging his wife. They're doing a good little bit of content here. And they're filming the basically decorating of a...

Nursery. It's like something from an American rom-com in the 90s. Yeah. And it looks amazing. And it's a vintage cupboard he's got as well. This is so far from my life. I know. This is no shade.

He ain't even got paint on him. This is no shade. And he could hang things up. This is no shade to Joe Sugg and Diant. This is jealous. This is pure jealousy. Yeah. Are people just better than me at life?

And we're struggling and people listen to this because everyone else is nailing it. And they're like, look at these two losers. I couldn't say it didn't chime with me as how it was when me and Rose were preparing for having a, having a child. That kid's not going in that cop for another six months, mate. Oh, wait, that might move. Well, that's what happened to us. We moved house before we used it. I had to build it, unbuild it, and then build it again.

No, that is a good video though, but yeah, that is, well, that is the perfect life. Talk about Instagram versus reality, but I think that is their reality. Well, we need to get them on and ask. How are you, Josh? I'm very good, actually. We've just... You're working less, so you're chilled, yeah? I haven't been working that much, actually.

No? No, that's what I'm saying. You haven't been, because you're working less. Yeah. Yeah. So it's been a bit of a stressful week. Okay. But this morning dropped my son off and my daughter,

but my daughter had been dropping off every day. But it was the first day back after five days with chicken pox. He's old for chicken pox as well, aren't he? Well, his whole class was getting it. They were four. My eldest got it when she was about three or four, but then my youngest got it when she was about 10 months old and it was horrific. She still got scars from it.

Oh, yeah. Oh, it's adults. You're not allowed to, it's bad to have it when you're an adult. So it's good to get, you want your kids. to get chicken pox when they're younger. And he was barely affected, to be honest. He had a load of spots, but beyond that, but what had happened is...

Not from being completely covered in itchy spots of scam. They weren't that, they weren't that itchy, no. And he never had a temperature. Imagine him going, but he had loads of spots, him just going, unaffected, dad. Have he seen my face? Unaffected. We only had one spot on his face.

Oh, really? Yeah. So what had happened is, they'd started to get it at school so we thought let's get him jabbed it's a double jab we got the first jab and then a few days later

we got chicken pox so I think it took the edge off It was like a glass of wine before a wedding speech Yeah yeah exactly so he was fine actually He didn't So basically he's been at home totally fine for five days unable to leave the house The classic situation

Well we had that on Monday When we're doing the I was recording this pod and Louers up in London working, they called and said that our daughter had to leave school. And I thought they said she'd been sick. I was like, no, because if they've been sick. Forty-eight hours. Exactly.

But she hadn't been sick. She felt sick. I think she had a bit of a sugar crash because she hadn't had enough to eat. And she had low blood sugar and just felt a bit queasy. So she went back in the next day. But yeah, you don't want them being sick at school. You don't want them being sick at school, Rob.

You don't want to be sick at school. Was you at home with you? at home with him then this week. I was on London. I was in London Thursday, Friday, but I was on, Rose was in London Wednesday, so I hung out with him on Wednesday.

So did you sleep, one, did you sleep that night before Radio 2? Yes. And secondly, what time did you get home? I got home at 1pm. Right, okay. So he was there for the afternoon. Yeah. And do you know people can see your sunspill pants through your jeans?

What do you mean? When you did your dancing on Instagram, to Dermot that Dermot does. You can see, because your sun spills are so well made. No, I don't believe that. I don't believe that. You can see the indent and line on your legs where the sun spills. Go, go.

That's the gene pocket. No, it's not the gene pocket. It wraps all the way around on both legs. How do you know? You haven't seen the back? Well, no, it wraps around the front. Well, that's because they're a good pant. I'm not saying they're not a good pan, but I'm just saying your sun spells are visible.

Where are they with this sponsorship? I don't understand what they're doing. It's not the pocket. you can see, go on there, look, you can see the seam. It's about an inch seam, isn't it, at the bottom? That's the indent of your sun spells. They're so powerful that they are indent in the gene. It's wild that I'm doing so much positive work for sunspill and then got involved.

No, that's not the sun spells of anything. I think that's the pockets. It's not the pocket, Michael, please look at this on Instagram. And you've been in the judge. Wait, well, wait, let me have a look at it now in the flesh. All right, okay, yeah. Shall I stand up to the camera and we can debate. Show me a groin.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you can, if you're on Spotify, can watch this. That's Josh. That's Josh's knees. And you've got to stand back. I can't see you. Stand on a... Yeah, you can still see the outline of the sun spells.

So that, that's the pockets. The sun spells are higher than that. Oh, are they? Yeah. That is the pocket. God, they're big pockets, didn't they? Yeah, that is the pocket. Fucking hell.

I apologize, I take it back. They're pockets. What, what jeans are they? Levi's? Levi's. Of course they are. Of course they are. Do you always have Levi's?

Yeah, I love Levi's. They're the best. And which ones? Five old ones. Five eleven's. Five eleven's. Okay. Fair enough.

I take it back. I thought they were the sunspills. They were the massive pockets. To be honest, Rob. Hmm. I thought, I presumed it was right. I was just panicking when I said it was the pockets. You had a pocket panic and won.

I'll be honest, I thought I've got to defend myself in some way even though I know he's right. That's why this pod works. I've got to throw something at it. I can't just admit that that's the sun spells. But it turned out that my fabricated defence was true.

You're like, that's how Donald Trump exists. Yeah, exactly. Just go off the, I'll manifest it. Those pockets grew in your pocket when you were telling that story. I don't like the side. Oh, Michael's typing. If the pocket fits...

A quit. Oh, nice. That's a joj is a lovely little... He's done a real joke. Can't tell Mock the Weeks back. Yeah, too right. Filtering through. You tempted it, Rob, by Mock the Week.

I could be tempted to do it. It could be fun for a time's sake. What? That is, you can't have a go at me now. Well, no, I don't want to do it, but I don't ever rule out potential future employment. Oh, okay, all right. That's me playing the game.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, fine. Ask me again. Would you ever do mock the week again? Ideally never, unless I was really skinned. Do you know what? In my defence, that's too harsh. I would do mock the week again if they promised I didn't have to stand up and do scenes I'd like to see. That's the reason I don't do it.

I love sitting at the desk chatting. I have really good nostalgic feelings towards sitting at the desk chatting. I really enjoyed that. I really liked that. We used to have a real laugh. And the scenes I'd like to see. was probably the worst I was at anything I've ever done on TV.

My heart would sink so heavy when they were like, right, now it's time of the scenes. Oh, God. Completely vomiting. Q. Den is just absolutely ripping it with a variety of brilliant voices. It's definitely, that's the actors game, that, in it? The actors love that.

Oh, God. And the big one bit to get into the mic. How's your parenting week been, Rob? Oh, mate, it's been busy. actually. Well, you know, Lou's away working actually. She was in Chester last night. Oh, yeah. A book event. Big launch. It was like a, and, you know, as the default parent, I've been defaulting at home, looking after the kids. Do you know what was good, though? I felt moral high ground, Lou message, because basically you got up quite early, because I got in at like 1 a.m.

Oh, God, I had a migraine in Baltimore, in Bournemouth. Was that what you went there? Yeah, I went there for a more. It's a new nightclub. You not been there? It was coming on during the show and then I had it on the way home and my head was so bad. I had strapped a Capri Sun to my head and held it in place by tying my hoodie up.

Why did you have a Capri Sun with you? Because it's cold and I had to put it on my head to call my head down. I get why you had that. Sorry, do you have a cap, is that on your rider? No, I stopped at a garage. Oh, right. Oh my God. That was a late night W.H. Smith's migraine hack.

Oh, my God. The Capri Sun strapped to my head with a hoodie and I started shivering. My cranes are awful. And then Lou was going up to Chester, but the taxi company, well, didn't cancel their taxi, never sent the taxi. To take her to the whole way to Chester? No, no, no, to the local, to the local, we have to use a local taxi firm to get us to the local station.

So she booked it for like 20 past seven. And she rang and went, oh yeah, someone's just took the job. There'll be about 20 minutes. And he was like, no. Yeah, I hate that. I ended up driving her to the station. And then the kids had to come, obviously. So I've got my hot chocolate from McDonald's.

But then Lou messaged me, because she had to get out there. It's a long old way up to Chester, and she did the book event. And she messaged going, God, I'm just so exhausted. Because she's basically doing it. She's basically doing what we do when we go on tour. But it's a book event, not standard. God, I'm just so exhausted. And I did so well not to text back, try doing five in a row.

But I didn't. No. You saved that for a public forum. Absolutely. I saved that for a bigger audience. And what I sent back directly was, I know it's so draining, but you're doing so well,

love you, babe. Didn't say babe, you never call the babe. Do you know what Rose does? Yeah. I've noticed is if I say something, so she says she was in the position you're in there. Mm.

So if I said to her, um, bloody hell I'm neckered of all this, all this homework or whatever. She'd say, tell me about it. And I think those words, what they mean is,

yeah, I know, because I do more. of it than you. That's cock in a gun and putting it to your head. Yeah. I know how you feel, but I know it more than you.

Yeah, I know more than you. So whatever you're feeling now, I've had it worse. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Tell me about it. So would you like that? That's a phrase that you'd like. So say in your relationship,

there's a phrase that you could delete that she says and then there's one that you delete for her. Is that what? It does, to be fair, make me go, yeah, Fair enough. Stop moaning. Yeah.

Yeah. So you're happy for it because it keeps you in check. No, I'm not happy for it. Oh, right. Look, Josh, I gave you a chance there. I tee you up for a lot of things that would win you favor with Rose. No, but you just... It's better to be honest.

It is useful, but sometimes things that are useful and bring you up short, it doesn't mean you're happy about it. No, it's like going to something running, isn't it? In the same way, a note about your performance as a stand-up, you might be annoyed initially. it will be useful in future. Yes. If someone said to you,

do you know what, you need to stop doing this? You'd go, oh, for fuck, say, you fucking wanker, why are you doing that? But in a day or two, you'd go,

they were right. Yeah, but then what if you can't change it? Someone goes, Rob, I really like you, but you're too loud, you're a bit full on, and you keep interrupting people,

and it's just a bit too much. And I'm like, yeah, well, I think you should just leave me alone then because that's not changing. This feels like a very specific example. Well, no,

but I'm aware, I think, I'm aware of the things that would great on people. Yeah, I mean, I don't think they should be giving you notes on that. But if they said, do you know what, you've got a tendency to, after a punchline, always make an er sound. I don't know. But you enjoyed it?

That's a comedian I watched recently. And I thought you keep making an er sound after a punchline. It's incredibly distracting. Rob, on the taxi thing in the morning, I had a situation similar to Lou on Thursday morning when I had to get the 550, 7.52 to London, which is my classic train now. Oh, that's the J.W. Spesh.

You know, it's a classic. So if you're on a 752 from Exeter to London, have a little look down the carriage. There's a one in five chance that I'll be on that train. Yeah, because once a week you're up. Once a week I'm up. So I ordered a cab. No cab

So what we do What are you doing it? Are you doing Uber or a local cab firm? It's Apple taxis Which is the extra equivalent of Uber basically Apple taxis They've got an app? Apple are they like a mini cab service with an app?

Yeah basically yeah yeah But they're not like a minicab company that evolves into an app Is it a new app? I don't know their history Right The app looks The app looks exactly like Uber

or all the other ones What the other ones call get or Get or? Get or or Halo or whatever. So they must have bought the same, you know. Anyway, failed to get a taxi for the first time, just couldn't get one. That is the hardest thing about not living, like, the thing that drives me most mad about

the countryside is the taxi situation. It's just so unreliable. And so I was like, I'm going to have to walk it. And then I realized, I started walking. I was like, I'm not going to make this in time. I'm not making the 752 here. I've bought a specific train. They know you're coming there, don't they?

Yeah, obviously they know I'm coming. But, you know, it was one of the first times ever It's not been delayed as well. I was fuming that it was on time. Yeah. So I go to the bus stop. I get on the bus. The bus is due at Exeter St. David's at 7.54.

I'm like, I'm fucked here. I've missed my train. For a man who claims to have lived in central London and also in central exit are? You get on the bus a lot. Exeter's, to be fair to me, is not a very central station. Fair enough. I stand corrected.

Pop that in the pocket. Yeah. In fact, there is an exit station called Exeter Central, which isn't used very much, but that shows the problem St. David's has gone. That's the problem with these. That does my head in. You know, Manchester and Liverpool, it's Piccadilly and Lime Street, right? Why can it be the set called Central? Exactly. Well, the problem with Exeter is the main one isn't called Central. The smaller one's called Central. And when Michael tried to come here to do the, do this studio, he tried to get a rail replacement from Exeter, St. David, to Exeter Central. I was like, Michael, there's no need. Anyway. You're in central.

You've got the, you're at the main station. You're an Exeter. You're an Exeter. Anyway, on the bus, I'm like, I'm going to have to change my ticket before the train leaves, aren't I? Because otherwise, I'm going to lose this ticket and I'm going to have to buy a new one. So I spend 80 quid to transfer it to the next train. Yeah.

Then what happens, Rob? Delayed? No. Bus cuts through the traffic, like a knife through butter. You get the 52? I make it to exit central at 7.50. Instinct takes over. I peg it up the stairs.

Instinct takes it. Pegg it. I love, I've seen you peg it before. Yeah, you can go. With the suitcase. You can move. Yeah. I peg it up the stairs.

Peg it on the 17. Yeah. On to 752. And then I have to basically negotiate with the guy to say, Look, come on. It's J.J. It's 750 to you know this. I had the right ticket.

I had the right ticket 20 minutes ago and now I haven't got the right ticket for this train. Give me a break. Technically, though, I can see your workings, but you are wrong and should be fined. I know, but you know what? He was very kind about it. Oh, that's nice.

But yeah, it was a stressful situation. Would you have run it at that point, if you and me at 7.50? How, what time was the next train? The next train was like half an hour later, but it also took half an hour more, so it had got in an hour later. No, I would have pegged it.

Yeah, you'd have pegged it. 100% on peg it. I'll be right behind you, mate, pegging me way there. So what else has happened to you this week? I've got quite a few things to go for, actually. Quite a lot of things to go through here. My daughter did our French homework in the car on the way to school. Right.

So she's 10. Our approach to homework is, I don't think she does all the homework she's supposed to be doing, but I'm completely tapping out of telling her or prompting her for her to learn. Right, yeah, yeah. Life lessons of, if you've been said it, it's your responsibility to do it.

And if the school comes... Is Lou in agreement with that? Yeah, Loo's in agreement with that. And if the school says she's not doing it or she's not doing enough or whatever... Would you even say, have you got any homework to do? No, we would say, have you got any homework to do

because we can do it now or we can do it Sunday afternoon? And then sometimes she goes, yeah, I do and get some of it. And sometimes she goes, I do, but I'll do it later or whatever. So we just... We offer it out, but we don't press. We don't go. you've got biology in on Thursday?

No, it's up to them to be aware of all of that. And I just think, if she does it, she does it, if you don't, she don't. But I think the school can sometimes be quite full on with kids, and I don't believe in homework anyway. But if they want to set it and they want to do it, I'll do it. But there's going to be no pressure coming from the family. Anyway, so she was doing that, and I was watching her doing it. And I was like, this is definitely going to be what she does.

This is definitely going to be how she approaches life. Do you know what I mean? Because you can only do serious. match as a parent, but after a while. What was her homework? It was just a sheet of a sheet where you filling? So she had like a hard book or whatever on her lap and she was just right, no. Because she's my daughter.

Just lend on the headrest of the seat in front of her. Oh my God. Oh my God. Legend. I was like, I fucking love this kid. Here we go. Here she is. The world's not ready for her, mate.

She's going in two-footed. Shoulders back head up. Let's go. You want some French, Homer? Fucking mercy. Have that. And then my other thought was a bit moaning this morning because it lowers away.

So I was doing this. And I'm so bad in the morning. I basically have to, if I was in charge all the time, I'd make sure everything was packed the night before and organised. Because in the morning, it takes me so long. I just can't trust myself to think.

I have to take all thinking out of my brain until about nine o'clock in the morning. Yeah. I'm just a body until 9 a.m. Yeah. So she was going, and I did a bit of old school parenting, Josh. Tell me what you think of this.

no. She went, yeah, I, parenting. No, she was going, oh, I've got swimming today and I hate it,

I hate swimming, and it's a swimming garner, and I'm going to lose because I'm swimming against a girl that does it at the weekend and she's great, and I'm not. And I went,

yeah, but I hate swimming garner, to have to swim up and down, it's boring, and then she was moaning, and I went, it's just not going to be any fun. I went, look, you are good at swimming,

you're really good at swimming, and you like swimming, okay? So you will be swimming today, whether you like it or not, because that's what's happening today. So you can decide if it's going to be no fun and you're going to hate it or you can decide that it's going to be fun and you're going to enjoy it or you can decide just to do it

and then see how you feel at the time. They're the three choices you've got. So you decide and I just walked off. Wow. And how did that go? Well, stop the conversation, but I don't know if I've done some sort of emotional trauma. I think that's good. Well, yeah, because I'm acknowledging how she feels but then it's up to her to decide out of those three options yeah i think swimming gala's a bit intense and i felt quite like i'd done good parenting and i was quite a cool thing to say and as i walked off but then as i walked off i had three backpacks on my back a guitar and um two pea bags and a swimming bag and i knocked off a picture off the side because that's a turn all the bags hit the side before then i was fucking nailing it what else has happened um i got i got shade on the school pickup

So tell me what happened So they've been in this They don't normally do this after school club Because normally lose around to pick them up But obviously lose working more I'm working more this week They do this club that they can stay till about six or seven But six

Sorry Don't do that I know, I can't It's in my head too much I know but I don't want to do it It's just my kids do it And I can't say it about saying it Yeah

I'm not doing it to look like I'm not doing it like it's in like a cool way, like when people go, oh, fucking slay queen. I can't say that. Anyway, it's this after-sall club, and it's weird. So they do it every now and again, and they've done it a couple of times a week for the last couple of weeks,

because Lou's busier. Go in. And obviously, with that after-school club, you get the kids that are in it once a week, you get the kids are in it now and again, and then you get the lifers. Yeah. You know, it's because it's like walking to prison, isn't it?

Everyone looks up from the desk. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like who's being collected, who's up for parole. Yeah. And then you get the sort of, the ones that are in there till seven every day and you think I'll get people that got to work, mate, but look, you know, you did just tired to have a kid,

surely there's a bit of, there's a bit of middle ground. The lady's like, oh, not seen you in a while. And I was like, oh, Katty, playing that game, aren't we? And I was like, well, no, normally I do pick up in the car. So he wouldn't have. So, you know, what's the point? You don't do a lot of pickups? Yeah, but she wouldn't know anyway,

because they'd barely go in that one. Yeah. even if I do it. She was saying, are you sure you've not just built this up in your head, Rob? It was dark and rainy. I imagine I'd probably invented it because I needed to humanise my anger rather than just being angry at clouds. Because I know I had that second wind about February.

That fucking died of death five days into it. It's rained every day. Oh, it's all right. It's not been as bad. I thought it'd raid every single day in Devon. Well, it has, but it's brightened up a bit. Like, it's not as bad as it. It's definitely not been raining every day since.

But we had that long run in January. Yeah, all right. Okay, so you've had a bit of bright. It's a bit better these days. Yeah. I thought it rained it every day in Exeter since the start of the year. No, that's what it said it was going to. But we've had a couple of days where it hasn't rained.

Oh, right. We went to the beach recently. Oh, yeah? Yeah. What did you do there? Just a little walk? We just went from a little walk. How far's the beach from Exeter?

25 minutes. Drive? Yeah. That's nice. Very nice, isn't it? I'm asking I about Exeter and Rain. Why are you doing that? Yes, according to the Met Office, which is based in Exeter, as we know, it has rained every

single day in 2026 so far. Oh, that's interesting. Reletless rain. The last week. It's not rain today either. Oh, okay, so it could be the first day. Could be the first day. Maybe it's in the county.

The street, well, you've not been there three days a week. Oh, that's something fair. Two and a half. Let me tell you about my weekend. Let me tell you about my weekend. That's four days. You'll love my, you'll love the, you'll absolutely love the schedule I had. At the weekend, go on.

The last five days. Thursday. Starts with that train saga. Yeah. Yeah. It starts you pegging it. Starts with me pegging it. I get on the train.

And then I go and I go to Ranga Bee, Romish's production company. Right. Yeah. His podcast. Why are you doing that? Why am I doing that? Yeah. Because I've had it in for like two months.

Right, okay. So I get to Rangaby, do the last leg meeting on a Zoom. Yeah. Do the Ramesh podcast. How was that? A lot of fun, though they were, there was some builders in a Holland and Barrett next door, smashing some stuff up.

So we had to fit the podcast in their lunch break. See, they don't put that bit on the podcast on their one, do they? No, no. They're trying to. It would be an episode for us. Exactly. We'd leave the banging in. We'd leave the banging in.

And then on the way to St. Albans, this felt like too much. I did the Joe Marla podcast as well. I don't need to speak. If I speak, what's the Joe Zahmira? No, if I speak, I'll get in trouble. I don't speak. No. You're just, look, let's, Josh is working less and the proofs in the pudding.

Yeah, the proofs in the pudding. He's on the 7 a.m. train up to London to do two podcast, is a tour show? Tour show, lovely. First more show in two months, absolutely terrified. I forget it all. It's all fine. Oh, they're great.

I love those ones after a little break. Yeah, well, you think I'm not going to know any of this. Oh, no, I know all of it. It's fine. What weird, you know, I haven't said these words in two months, but they all still go in a row. It's weird, isn't it? It is weird.

So then I went to my hotel, slept. Well done. Then I had lovely sleep. and then I woke up, I went to the gym. Yeah. I had to pay to go to the gym, Rob, because it wasn't a hotel with a gym. I got in a bit of trouble at the gym.

Okay. Wet gusset? Not wet gusset, no. I went in my, I went, no suns spells. No suns spells? Yeah, the new me. Did some weights. Oh, you're just wearing the lining?

Just the lining, the new me, yeah. See, that's what people love about you, Josh. You are willing to evolve? I am willing to evolve. You won't basically slow, but I will evolve if it makes more.

I don't think I think you just didn't think about it. You just thought, here's my shorts, going on my pants. I can't wear naked dick to the gym,

but you can. Exactly, you can, exactly. So I got it. So I got there. So I'd paid, you know,

you can pay like a one-off thing to go to a gym. Yeah. So they gave me a towel when I paid. He gave me a towel at reception.

I've never been to this gym before. I went downstairs. I pumped some iron. I ran 5K. And then I came back up, bought a protein shake and left my tail. This is the man that should be on the front cover of Runners' World. Wow. And then walking out of the gym, I'm about just rounding the corner

and a man chases after me. And it's the receptionist to basically say, mate, you can't leave your towel on reception. You've got to dispose of it downstairs. You can't be leaving me to dispose of your sweaty towel. I understand his point, but it was a genuine mistake. I've never been to that gym before. So you just thought you'd give it, they might have been for it up there?

Well, it's because that's where it had been given to me. I was like, oh, I just returned. Do you know what I mean? I wasn't. Yeah. Because there's not like tower disposal in the changing room. Obviously, I hadn't got changed because I was going to the hotel. You didn't get changed?

No, I got changed. It was next to my hotel, so I got into. Right. So you just went in your gym. So you didn't go in the changing room. I didn't even go in the changing room. So you just gave him a sweaty towel? Yeah.

But did you say, where can I put this? Or did you just leave it on the side? I just left it on the side unthinkingly, Rob. Yeah. It wasn't malicious. No, I know it wasn't malicious. But I think him chasing you down the road. What he needs to, what I would do in that situation,

go, you know, that Josh Whitelpham's coming. Just left his dirty towel here, grubby little bastard. That's what I do. Right on what they say about him on that podcast. He's a dirty bastard. Ha ha. So I apologised, but I do think I'm never going here again. I do think chasing you down the road to a bit much where, like you say,

if you've not been to the changing room, you've not been there before, you've just left it on the side because that's where you've got it. I think that's fair enough. It's a mistake. Did he make you come back? No, he didn't. No. I'm not a member.

He didn't have anything on me at the end of the day. So what did you say, or sorry? Sorry, I didn't realize. And what did he say? Well, that kind of took the word. window of his sales really. That's a really weird thing to chase it. Well, obviously, you've just got confused. And also, it's not drenched in sweat. It's got a bit damp, maybe. Exactly, yeah. And then what do you do? You went back to the hotel and get into bed and go to sleep for 10 hours.

I went back to the hotel. Shower? Shower, obviously. Well, not obviously, because sometimes you don't. Don't say like that. Obviously a shower. No, but you don't always. I'm out and about. And then I went into the last leg. So say, for example, you'd been doing a TV show during the day, and you went to the gym at 7 o'clock, and then you did that workout and you got back to around about 8 o'clock. Yeah. Shower, obviously? Possibly a bath.

Okay. But shower, yeah. Because I feel like I'm in a hotel then. I don't know there's something different about it. So you've got more respect for the hotel than Rose? No, I haven't got more respect for the hotel than Rose. I'm not in bed with Rose. Tell me about it.

So I did that. Last lag. Got back at, you know, midnight, got up for Domo O'Leary. Did that eight to ten. God. What time do you have to be at Radio 2? Seven. But I was in, my hotel was next to Radio 2.

What do you normally do after last night? Then get a car home to Exeter? Yeah, which would get me in at about half, two, three. And then I got on the train. Rob, I was so tired. I wonder why. Yeah. I put on my puffer jacket.

Oh, the old buffer puffer. The old buffer puffer. Put the hood up. He said that I was nice and snug. I went to sleep. And I was on a table opposite people. I'm like, I don't care if they think I'm weird to put my puffer jacket on with the hood up. That's fine.

You're getting cozy? I got really cozy on that train. And then I slept. And then I came home and then I took my daughter to a sewing lesson. Oh, nice. And then I had to come home. go to Bristol. Why?

Oh, tour. Tour. Oh my God. You did that radio show knowing that you had to go Bristol the next night. Puffer back on. Straight to sleep all the way to Bristol. I don't think you're working less. I am working less.

What am I doing today? Just this. So last week you did Monday on the podcast? Yeah. What did you do Tuesday? Day off? No, I did my other podcast on Tuesday. Museum of Pop Culture, I do listen in.

Yep. Wednesday? Well, Wednesday I had just last like Zoom meetings, but then my son had chicken pox, I looked after him all day. So, yeah, so you were parenting and working. Well, no, I fucked off the Zoom meetings. I can't be doing these.

And then you went out, and then you did the two podcasts, your tour. Actually, on Wednesday night, also had a gig, a warm-up. I did 20 minutes to warm myself back up before the tour show. So kind of been a surprise that you remembered all the words because you did a gig the night before. Josh, you are not working less.

Well, no, the problem was the Wednesday. What was a warm-up gig? Exit a comedy festival gala. Okay, at least it's local. To be honest, I didn't run through that much because it turned out there was someone from my school in the audience, so I did 15 minutes talking to her. Did you have Sunday off, though?

You had Sunday off? Sunday. No, another day in Bristol. Well, it's not my fault that I'm doing a tour. That's normal, doing two tour shows. Yeah, yeah, that's normal, and that's been booked in for a year and a half. What isn't is the two extra podcasts and the Radio 2 show.

I know for a fact, right, that you are going to a foreign country and you are planning on doing two podcasts from your hotel room while presenting a TV show. I'm not saying I don't work a lot, okay? Yeah. I do work too much and I'm trying to work less. Yeah.

You are actually saying... How? How? In what actual ways? I'm not doing QI, Rob. You know what? If I was QI, I'd start to get fucking pissing. pissed off now. I love QI. That's why it was such a big decision. Now it's starting to look personal.

No, because he's able to tune by with Joe Marla. But that's promo, Rob. So you do the promo so that in the long term, I have to leave the house less. Okay. What if QI said you could wear a t-shirt with the logo of your new podcast on? Yeah. Let's get back in the room, guys. Let's talk about that. It will be weird, though. The Hyundai-A-Lantra hybrid inspires a special type of love. The type that makes you slow down and enjoy the ride. With best-in-class fuel efficiency and a best-in-class new car warranty, it's made for the long run, wherever the road takes you next. Because some relationships are built to go the distance.

It's that Hyundai-A-Lantra type of love. I actually baked a loaf of bread as well this morning. It ain't bread. You sent me a picture of your bread. You know, we spoke about it before. heavy love. We've got to get that on Instagram. It is heavy.

Shall I bring them some slices up for you tomorrow? Have we got a toaster at Spotify? If not, I've got me trouble. Michael, can you check with Daniel Eck whether they've got a toaster at Spotify? And if they have... That's going to kick off Spotify HQ. That's going to be an email to the sort of maintenance department.

Something's going to get pack tested just because Josh Winnickel wants to fucking crucify his heavy loaf. I'll bring up some heavy loaf and some butter. We'll get there and there'll be a freelance firefighter stood in the corner while you try and toast it. Well, if he's got kids, he's welcome on the show. Two for one. Yeah, two for one. And not many famous firefighters are there?

You know, there's always like famous gardeners that do TV and they go. You know, like people spin off into it. Like, you know, like Bear Grills is a famous survivalist or Jason Fox is a famous soldier. Yeah, you don't really get it with firefighters, do you? Because you even get it to policemen, don't you? Do you? Don't know? They were famous police officer.

Well, you get a lot with medical professionals, don't you? Yeah, a lot of doctors spin off, like those two brothers. Yeah. Dr. Zanda or something. Chris and Zand. Can I look, can I, I want some help actually. This is a, we're going to Europe in August for a little road trip. That's too vague.

France? France, okay. So we're going to France on the Shat. I thought you wanted some help with a specific location. Sorry. I was going, I can't give you tips on where to go in Europe. Does anyone know of any good hotels in Europe? San Maritz or Benadol, they're the best two places.

No, it's... So we've got Le Chateau, right? So I don't know what's gone on here. So I try to... What did you book? Le Chateau. The Euro Star. No, Le Chateau.

What's Le Chateau? The Chautel is Fokxton to Calais, and you drive the car on a train, and you stay in your car. Oh, right. And it takes 35 minutes. Le Chateau. Yeah. Anyway, so I was trying to book it yet. So we're going with some friends.

I was trying to book it on Saturday. And it was coming up at like £44 for a car, family car return. Standard plus, which means there's some flexibility or whatever. So I tried to do that. And then we were, oh, yeah, they're the times. And then I couldn't book it because I couldn't log, I couldn't download the Le Chateau app because I've got a new phone. and it takes four days, four days until you can reset your Apple login.

Oh, God. So I waited four days, and I've reset my Apple login, and I've downloaded the shuttle, and I put it all in. It's come up 80 quid more expensive. Right. So then I tried to get on my computer

and 80 quid more expensive. Nothing's changed in the booking, exact same car, and then my friends have got the same car, similar car, put it all in, family of four, exact same day, so theirs was 80 quid cheaper.

What the fucking hell in the cash-o? cookies has happened. Yeah, I don't know his answer. What will increase that price? Can someone tell me, is it they know I've been looking? If you put it in AI? I've not asked AI.

And I don't even know how to ask them that. No, because I don't think you can say what the fuck in the cashie cookies. But this is what the beauty of humanity is. Someone listen will know what I mean. Exactly. We've got the greatest AI of all, which is human beings. Which is humanity. Humanity.

Humanity. because aren't we all just artificial? Well, exactly. We're just all particles and atoms smashing into each other that burp out of these words, you know? Exactly. Spinning on a bloody fucking rock in the middle of the universe. Oh, yeah, too right, man.

Pass the fucking do, but let's enjoy ourselves. Yeah, give me a puff on the old bifto and let's fucking slide into this next three hours of this pod. I'm sick of logins as well, mate. I feel like since 1040, I've just fucking tapped out on computers and I can't be bothered. I just can't remember my logins. Pete, they always go,

oh, there's been a data leak. They know your things. I don't care. I can't. Fucking have them. How much time? How much time do you think I have in my life to change my login to John Lewis?

I'm going to forget it anyway. Yeah. Yeah. I was sorry, I need to do a slightly different because this one needs to have some punctuation in it, whereas the last one didn't.

So I can't have the same one, but I've got to remember all of them, but I'm not allowed to write them down. it makes no sense at all. And my phone seems to decide to remember some but not others. Yeah. And then it suggests some that are just impossible to remember. What the fuck are they?

If it ain't got one, two, three, an exclamation mark at the end, I'm not interested. Yeah, exactly. It's absolutely mental. Oh. And yes, I do open my phone with my PIN number. Who cares? Everyone does.

Everyone who's sane doesn't care. Because it's too tiring to care. I am, big moment for me this week, Josh. I'll finish on this before small business. Yeah. I signed off my first email as dad. Oh.

So they've got in touch you there. Oh, you ancestry.com bastards. No, so obviously my oldest daughter emailed me. She emailed me asking for something about her own work and I'm about to go on stage. And I was texting who went, sorry, she's emailed me. Are you not around? Are you okay?

She went, I'm in the bedroom next door to her. She can't be bothered to move. What, loose of that. Yeah. So she's rather than walk to her mom, she's emailed me. Amazing. So I just replied, go and ask your mum to do that. And I went to write Rob.

And I went, oh, my God. I'm not Rob here. Oh, my word. I'm dad. And then as I wrote it, I was really paranoid. Can you know you see all those sort of gen X's and Gen Z's talking about millennials, how they sign off in emails with thumbs up and it's too harsh and upsets them? I looked at us.

I don't want to be a cold dad on email. Oh, God. And then I'm putting two loads and then like loads of sort of like, love you. And like being silly enough, oh, are you doing too much here? Yeah. Yeah. needy. You love bombing.

But yeah, the first ever email signed up as Dad. And then I wrote Daddy. Oh, do I write Dad? Oh, God. I don't know what to say. In 20 years, that'll be your only correspondence with her as she, you know, emails she wants every two months. When she's travelling. Hi, Dad, just got to Vietnam.

Solo travelling's great. In a great hostel. I've met some brilliant friends called Brian, Steve, Gary and Lewis. Oh, God. Oh, it's all going to be over soon, Rob. Have fun. Oh. Oh, man.

Lou, do you fancy going to hooch him in? I thought it could pop over. Yeah, in four days once I can get the... Get the login for the aeroplane. Have I talked to you about horse riding? I know that she was going and you're in denial about a horse. My son is... My son's now done his first proper lesson, Rob.

This might found bad. Yeah. I find men riding horse is quite funny. and I don't know why. Women riding horses, it looks like a real spiritual connection with the horse. And it's like, I think it's really pure and lovely.

And I don't know, I think it feels like a nice thing. But when I see a man on a horse, I don't know, I just feel, it's a little, maybe it's because I've always seen men on horses fighting in more like old war films.

But I find a man on a horse in the trousers. I don't know. It just makes me giggle. The joppers makes me giggle. When a woman on a horse is, I don't find a funny image. but I found a man and a horse funny. I've never seen a boy on a horse.

Yeah, it's, I mean, now we're just, we're locked in. I don't know. Are you doing it with them? No, I'm not doing it. So you can go for a nice hack? No, I'm not doing it with them so I can go for a nice hack, no. So you're just watching? I'm just watching, yeah, which is a very pleasant way to spend your evening, to be honest.

It's amazing, though. There's so many more like, you know, doing that kind of stuff for them with the countryside you've got out there and close to the scene. compared to East London. Because East London's cool and fun, but for a certain age demographic. A huge amount for the age demographic that they're in. And you don't want to go trampoline parks in Stratford. Climbing wall again, is it?

It's that, isn't it? Clip them on. Yeah, clip them on. Ex warehouse now turned into activity centre. Get yourself down in the industrial estate. We're going up a wall and down again. There's a lot of that. So is he enjoying the horse?

Yeah, he's loving it. He's loving it. And so I think we're locked in with both of them there. Couple of horses. A couple of, oh my word, what a life. If it will be like, oh, the thing is, if we get one horse then they can share the horse and then it will save money and riding lessons because we're not paying for the lessons.

No, it won't save money. The riding lessons aren't nearly as expensive as a horse. They need to up that the price. After a while, they're not going to be renting a horse from to ride as opposed to they're not going to need the lessons. How long do you and I have to ride a horse properly then? Well, I think the lessons are infinite, aren't they? you can always get better.

I don't know. Yeah, I know, but Tiger Woods don't go for a golf lesson before he tees off now, doesn't he? Like, not his local club. No. You get to a point where you're all right on your own. Tell me about your golf. My golf?

Rob Beckett's, Rob Beckett, let's golf. Yeah. That came up on my Instagram. You back into golf. So, yeah, I've started playing golf more now, and I've got a lot of time off from June, July onwards, so I'm going to hit it hard this summer.

Because I basically want to get, that's actually one of my problems. I hit it too hard. Oh, is it? Got long arms. Have you? Anyway, got really long arms. I want to be able to play with my mates and go on golf trips abroad,

but I'm not good enough yet. So I'm sort of doing loads now, and I'm filming it as I go. And how good do you need to get? Well, a lot better than I am. But I want to get to the point where it's like a fun event, not like, yeah, it's all right if you come, mate. I want to be involved in the game. Who are these people that you're trying to get in with Rob?

Well, my dad plays, my brother's play. I've got a mate, Lloyd's plays. Oh, I see. There's loads of Tom Davis plays. There's loads of comedians at play. There's loads of footballers at play that I know near me. I've got, um... Oh, yeah.

My neighbours play footballers. No, but I like a nice walk. Who are the footballers who want to play golf with? No, who do I don't know what I want to, well, what I'd like to do as well, get to a point where I can go on like those Celebrity Pro Am. Oh, wow. Where you get to go away and just play golf for the weekend.

And I find it really good. like playing on my own as well. I find it really calming and quiet as I walk around playing and I get left alone. So I would like to get to a point where I'm good enough to play on those things because they're really fun events. And then if I could just film myself doing it, well, it would be quite good as well? People like the golf content. And if I'm doing that, I don't have to think about being funny.

It's not like comedy. I just basically go and do it because I'm shit. It's quite funny anyway. But I am bad. The clips, we've got a couple of episodes. And at the moment, we're just doing little short videos every Sunday. But if people like it and it does well, I might. start doing longer YouTube videos.

But again, I'm trying to do stuff that's near home. Well, not for me. Someone else edits it. I just play golf and they film it. Oh, here we go. That's the same, Rob. We all make those deals with ourselves. Before you know it, every Sunday,

you're like, I've got to get down the fucking golf course because otherwise my YouTube numbers are going to drop. Practice what you preach, brother. Yeah, but yeah, there's a difference between me playing golf at a golf called five-minute drive in my house than you going up to do Ramesh and Joe Marla. Oh, who are? Or do it.

Yeah, because I will be playing golf anyway. You wouldn't be doing a Zoom call with Susie Ruffle to talk about the spy skills in your spare time, would you? Well, I would be reading all that stuff, to be honest, and talking about it. Well, film that. What, film myself reading. Yeah.

There's right perverts out there. They'd love that. Don't worry about what you think they want. Do what you want to do and find the audience. This is me reading a book on a train. Read a book out loud on a train. Just show you, just live stream you reading a book on a train and reply to the comments.

I don't think that was as relaxing. Honestly, I think if you live streamed yourself on the 752 from Exeter to London, after about six months, you'll probably get more viewers of last leg. Should I do a live stream? Adam Hills and Brooker will be on the train with you doing promo for the next series of last leg.

When does this go out, Michael? Does it go out tomorrow? The first time I get the train after this has gone out, Rob. Yeah. I'll just do a live stream where I won't, I won't address the camera, I'll just film myself on the train for five minutes, whatever happens, happens. Yes, just having phone.

And just you crack on as normal. Just crack on as normal, okay? And just put it out as a video. Do it as a live stream. I'll do it as a live stream. Because then there's a sense of community or people will be chatting to each other. And then at the end of the live stream, you can click post video and see how it goes. Do you want me to tell you when it'll be?

I'm going to remind myself as well. When is it? It's when we've got parenting hell in London on February the 25th, Rob. Yep. So I'll be getting the 752 that day. I'm going to put that in the diary then. Are you going to go live at 752 once you're on? No, she want to get settled.

Do you want me to get settled? What time would you like me to go live? I think I want you to, as soon as you're on the train and you'll see, prop your phone up and press live and then just be getting ready and stuff. Okay, cool. And then... So Josh, 752. Do you know what?

I'll do it the moment the train pulls up so you can see me getting on. So you feel myself getting on? Yeah, okay, fair enough. Okay. Just do it from when you're at the station. Like, from... Say to people, probably around 745, logging on time. Yeah, I'll be on the bus by then.

You'll see me pegging it upstairs. And you're just always sitting... If you haven't listened to the podcast, there's going to be so many people going, what the fucking... So many people would have think I'm mistaken. live streaming. They'll find out in the comments. 752 or the 25th of February.

Yeah. All right. Right. Small business. Small business. Hi, Robin Josh. Very long time listener here of three boys, 975. I wanted to give a small business shout to my super talented friend Claire, also a mama of three who makes memory bears from baby clothes or from the clothes of loved ones who have passed. The website is Made at Mine. Made at Mine. or M-A-D-E-A-T-M-I-N-E. Also on Facebook and Insta, Made-U-M-A-N-M-A-K-K-L-A-N-N-E.

Claire has three children put so much love and attention into each bear. Based in Warnham in Sussex, but clothing can be posted. She adds signatures, initials, and special dates to the bears. She will pretty much try and fulfill any request, christening, outfit, school uniforms. It would be amazing if you'd give her a shout-out so I can continue having coffee with her on Friday so she doesn't have to get a different job. Thanks so much, Sophie.

Good luck there to Claire at Maid. that mine. Also, thank you to the lovely couple after Woken that were really polite and kind after the show and said hello and said how much they listened to the podcast and stuff. They were a really, really nice couple. So thanks for being so nice. Dear Rob, Josh and Michael, I'm a fan of the pod, day one listener. And myself, my wife, saw Rob at the infamous Kendall Leisure Center gig. Oh my God, I've got something to tell you, Rob. Go on. Is it too late? Should I say it for the next episode? I think I'll forget. I'm just going to tell you.

So we had the woman on last leg who does see it, say it, sorted. You know that voice? See it, say it. What about bombs and stuff on trains? Yeah, so we had a guest on who said they loved that woman, that voiceover. It's part of that. So we're like, let's get her on. She comes on.

She said, I've seen you live to me. Yeah. She was at the notorious Barnard. Castle warm-up show we did. Oh, really? I couldn't believe. When no one knew what a podcast was. She knew what it was.

She knew what it was. She was there for the correct reasons, but she said she thought most people didn't know what was going on. They didn't. They were just two famous people in Barnard Castle, basically. Two blooms of the tell at the Garst Center. Yeah, so we were doing all that crowd work.

Little did we know. If we'd pick the right person, it would have been the CET, say it's sorted, woman. We'd have had an absolute. We'd have had an absolute. An absolute field day. We'd have had 10 great minutes of stuff

that would never be used in the tour. Exactly. That's what warm-ups are all about. The infamous Kendall Leisure Centre gig. I know we aren't from Bromley, but I would love it if you could give my wife's pony party business a shout-up. We are parents to an 8-year-old and twin three-year-old boys. After maternity leave ended,

my wife Camilla started a pony party business, the tiny pony parlour. She offers sessions for individual, small groups, or full-on birthday parties. Children have the opportunity to groom the ponies, cover them in glitter, ride and generally have fun-filled introduction to ponies. The response from parents and children has been amazing. So I'm sure she's going to make a success of it,

but any extra publicity you could offer to help boost this along would be amazing. You can find her at the tiny pony parlour on Instagram or the tiny pony parlour. com.com.com. Thanks, Jamie. Cheers, Jamie. Josh, I see you next time. See you next time. Bye. Hello, parenting hell listeners. Recognise that voice? Yes, it's Josh Widdickham here.

I have got a new podcast, Josh Widdickham's Museum of Pop Culture, and I'm going to say it. I'm about 85% sure you're going to love it. Here are the reasons why. Number one, I'm confident if you're listening now, you don't hate me, and possibly think I'm funny. Number two, I'm confident if you're listening now, you like podcasts. Number three, I'm confident if you're listening to me and Rob, you prefer pop culture to people talking about things. things, let's be honest, boring things like history, economics or politics. I know I do and that is why I made this podcast. I wanted a show that tells the stories I love from popular culture in the way other podcasts

do for drier topics. See above. Basically, I wanted a podcast that realized Millie Vanilli were more interesting than Elizabeth I first. Join me as I give the definitive, or at least the funniest, takes on Mr. Blobby. When Ghost Watch convinced BBC viewers ghosts were real, when a band burned a million pounds for a laugh. The Spice Girls, a truly catastrophic Spider-Man musical with music from you too, and David Haselhoff, Baywatch, and his part in the fall of the Berlin Wall.

All of them are real, by the way. Either you know what these things are and you're about to learn far more about them than you ever realised you wanted to, or you don't, and you're about to be introduced to some of the maddest things in modern or ancient history. Stiff next will learn, lose next will laugh. New episodes available every Wednesday and Saturday. Perfect to fill those gaps between your weekly doses of parenting hell. So go on, you might as well listen, subscribe and follow wherever you get your podcast now.

Museum of Pop Culture with me, Josh Whitacom, available everywhere from the 1st of January.