Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S12 EP43: Multi-generational Bad Parenting

Episode Date: June 2, 2026

More misadventures in parenting, life, and beyond with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe... heatwaves, half-term, and diggerland plans. Enjoy! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Parenting Hell⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠���⁠⁠⁠ is a Spotify Podcast, new video episodes available everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Please subscribe and leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: [e-mail] Follow us on instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@parentinghell⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello, you're listening to Parenting Hell with... Ribbon, can you see Josh Whedickham? Los Widdickham. And Rob Beckett. Rob Beckett. Oh, there we go, Rob. That was absolutely flawless. Was his name Rubin?

Rubin. Rubin. Say it sounds like she said Ribbon. Is it an accent? Can I hear it again, please, Josh? Ribbon, can you see Josh Whittickettick? It's Rubin in a Scottish accent. But then it sounds like Ribin.

Rubin. Rubin. Rubin. Josh, can I pick up on your energy? Yeah. I feel like you are relaxed because you've been at home for a few days, but a little bit absolutely depleted because it's been an intense week and you're like happy, chilled but no energy.

As of the time of recording, Rob, we are doing this in the midst of packing. Oh. Okay. For a little week holiday. We're going on holiday for half term. Nice. We're recording this Sunday of the bank holiday weekend at 9.30 a.m. Hardcore for your ears.

So you little snaps don't go. They don't put much effort in anymore. We're here, front line Sunday. I've got the kids in the office downstairs, drawing on the walls. Exactly. Where's Lou? She's in France for a friend's 40th. Oh, lovely.

Oh, lovely. I'm loving being at home. She needed a break away. I needed normality at home with the kids. Yeah, exactly. So I am quite relaxed, but I don't enjoy packing. And it was my son's birthday yesterday party. Let me just read out this Rubin thing.

Yeah, let's get Ribbon. Get Ribbon sorted. This is Rubin, aged 28 months from Livingston, Scotland. 28 months. Is that two years? About 30 seconds after this clip, I had to play Lego with him and pretend to be Josh and Rob. Thanks, Chloe Jacobs.

Oh, thanks, Chloe. You might also have noticed the quality of the sound of that production, Rob, because I've got a new phone. You've got a new phone? What are you gone for? Finally upgraded to just the newest iPhone, obviously, because I don't know what I'm talking about, so I just go, can I have this?

Can I have the same one, but the modern version? I'm going to get a Google Pixel for personal and then keep my iPhone for business. Yeah, you talk about this and I don't know what that means. Well, I'll tell you what it means, actually. How do I contact you on our WhatsApp group? No, so that'll be my work one, but what I'll do is... What if I want to indulge in some fun banter? Well, that's exactly what the new phone will be for.

So what it'll be for is, Josh, I'm going to give a personal number. up to friends and one of the agents and say only in an emergency call this number. This is like Scorsesey's got his trousers down at Claridge's. Go there and do your worse, Rob. No. So I'll give, on my personal phone, I won't have social media. Oh, right. So I was going to say, if I'm honest with you, the work stuff's not the thing that drags

me into my phone addiction. No, exactly. But I only really need social media for work. I'm not a big fact. It doesn't bring anything. to my life socially. No, you do spend a lot of time. I don't know if it's changed.

You do spend an inordinate and out of time kind of doom-scalling TikTok. Hours! So you're trying to lose that. Trying to lose that. So this is what it'll be. So then I've used my work phone from like 10 a.m. till 6pm or 5 p.m. in the week, yeah?

Then I put that in a drawer and turn it off until the next morning. And then I do have my other phone. And on my other phone is Ringo, if I'm driving anywhere for the parking. I'll have a WhatsApp. an iMessage but it'll be a new number and I'll only give this number out to friends and family that won't contact me about work and you'll know that you've got Rob personal

Michael Michael can have it because sometimes we have banter about football shirts if he doesn't want it that's fine as well I'll give people the choice and I'll have my calendar on it but I won't have any emails on it no emails and no social media I'm excited for this yeah and I'm just going to float around like a businessman in the 80s it's just like

what email should email yeah and then you've got a gig in the evening and you haven't got the address because the address isn't an email. Yeah, but I'll have my work phone then because I'll still be at work. Oh, I see. Yeah, yeah, fine. Yeah. Okay. Is what I'm saying? This is like for holidays, weekends, now, you know, but then it is, yeah, so that's the plan. I think it's a good plan. I like it. I like it. I like it. I'm just exploring the plan. I'm exploring the plan. Explore the plan. I'm opened up. Dig. Yeah. Okay. So you're lying by the pool on holiday. Are you taking your work phone and putting it in that little safe you get in the hotel room?

Yeah, and I'll check it for an hour in the morning. So what are you doing by the pool? Are you going to have podcasts on this phone? I'm going to have podcasts on there. I'm going to have music on there. I'm going to throw some apps out, and I want you to say whether they're on the personal phone. Personal phone, yep. Okay.

Banking. Banking, Amazon. Can I tell you something? And this makes you feel like a 70s house husband. You know, like those dads and men that still have their clothes bought for them by their wives. and they packed them. You've never bought anything online. I have never had an Amazon account.

What? I've only ever just logged in to Luz. On her phone? No, I will use her login on my phone. Oh, right. But then sometimes I'll have to shout downstairs, what, give me the code! Right, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I need to purchase something. Give me the code. Are you going to have the Amazon app on your personal phone? Now, this is where it's going to get sticky. Passwords. Passwords. I know none. They're all on my work phone.

What is currently my phone? Can I ask why you're going for a different type of phone? Just so it feels different. Right. That's what you said when you had an affair as well, wasn't it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So what I'd like to discuss with you, Rob, other apps. I'm going to go through my apps, actually.

Yeah, go on. Are you going to have stuff like Netflix? Maybe, maybe not, but I wouldn't install it immediately. I'd see if I need it. Maybe for on holiday and on the plane, I'd have Netflix. High player. I play, Netflix, stuff like that. Yes, I probably will on the personal.

Deliveroo? On the personal one? Yeah. Yeah. Also, the child coming up. One second. You're right. I'm just recording.

Oh, you need the internet. Oh, sorry about this. I should have done this before. I knew there was something. Oh, no. Right. Can you stop playing with baby Yoda? Oh, God.

Hang on. It's all right. I'm just going to log. The kids are with me, Josh, at the office because it's half term. Just give them your personal phone, Rob, or your work phone. What's that? Well, no, they brought their iPads, but I forgot to log them in. Oh no.

Right. Oh, no. It's a long one as well. Oh, no. You're right there? You're okay. You're not share it? Hang on.

Let's see if... Oh, yes, it shares. Sorry about this, Josh. Bring the iPad up and I can get you online. Sorry, Josh, Michael. Give me some more apps while I'm doing this. Okay. He's a new iPhone.

It's massive. No, it's a bit bigger, actually. But I didn't go with the big one. I fucking hate those big ones that people go for. so all of my other ones are like just those things that you just accrued do you know what I mean yeah but you need like banking you need parking and stuff like that yeah all that so it will work rob it'll work yeah I think it's a really good idea so that's a plan and I think it's an excellent idea all done they're online but yeah that's a plan I let you know I'll get on yeah good idea so

what are you up to for half term so half term I'm off for most of it I've got to do two days of work in the middle. But Lou's coming back Tuesday. So we've just been chilling in the garden. The weather's so good. Did you get the call up from that job you were covering on Friday? No. Basically, there's jobs in TV where when there's a TV show on and there's a big cast,

sometimes they pay people to be on standby. And you don't get paid the full fee, but you get paid a decent fee to sit at home next to your phone, like an emergency plumber. Either phone. And it rings. either, well, no, that would be work phone there. I wouldn't even have a personal one out because I take standby seriously. Yeah, of course.

Actually, where some people don't. Some people just live their life with the phone. I'm like, no, I'm in. And I've got the phone there. I sit at my kitchen table with a glass of water and phone in front of me. And I do not move until I get the call. And you think of jokes that you could come up with were you to get the call? Yeah, and I'm dressed in my outfits.

Yeah, of course. My comedy outfits. And I've got my squirty, like, feather, squirty flower. I've got my red nose. and I'm a clown on standby. Yeah, exactly. But I didn't get the call up. But some people will do it for a whole series of something.

So they'll often get the call in that situation. Because if there's like 10 episodes, I'll probably get a dropout. But it does mean that some people are like, I don't know, on standby for the whole series of what I'll lie to you, with their lies. Do you know what I mean? Oh, yeah.

Yeah, this one wasn't as much prep. So that was all right. but yeah, no, I didn't get a call up. So I was just chilling at home. Then I got the call up at half ten to tell me I was released. Because basically some of them, once everyone arrives at the studio, you're good as gold. So I'm not going to name the show because I think that's a bit unfair. But you know on some shows you have to prepare what you're going to talk about.

You'll bring a topic or you'll be doing a bit or whatever. Yeah. I know of a story of a show where you have to bring what you're going to talk about. And each person brings a different thing they're going to talk about. And then someone pulled out. And the replacement had to just talk about this topic because the whole show was built around it. So you're not just replacing the person

and coming in like you were on that show. Right, doing your own thing. You have to replace this. You have to suddenly pretend that this is what you care about and this is what you've brought. Because all the production that's gone into it. Oh, that's brutal. Because of all the production, yeah.

So someone had to come in, your daughter says? That noise? No, there's some weird noise. What's going on? One second. Oh, God. Oh, no. Oh no.

This is a classic old school app. This is a classic old school parenting hell app. Do you know what? I'm going to celebrate by dancing my tea bag with my fingers while Rob's not there because he won't see it. One of them just used the toilet and that's the toilet making a noise that it does for a bit after someone's been to the toilet. But normally I'm here on my own. You've never been to the toilet. Well, I have been to, it stopped.

I have been to the toilet, but not normally during the pod. Yeah, of course, of course. That would be awful. Yeah, horrible. I'll move the camera. Now. Yeah, go on. My son's birthday, my son's birthday party yesterday.

Yes, Diggerland. Diggerland. How was Diggerland? Have you ever been to Diggerland? No, I haven't. It's a bit far, but, you know, it's not the kind of one you can do for a day from London. So there's quite a few Diggerlands in the UK. Oh, okay.

So this is the Devon Diggerland. Yeah, well, just look at H. H.S.2. Bloody, the whole country's a Diggerland, I'm all right? Oh, here we go. Here we bloody go. Get him on LBC. Yeah.

Just to get to the optimum 20 minutes quicker. Come on. Here we go. Here we go. Inches poo. That's what I call it. Ideally, I'd get to Manchester slower,

am I right? Because I don't want to bloody be there, etc. Oh, my word. Here we go. What, you're right? Yeah, can I come in more?

Yeah, quickly. Yeah, come in quick. I found this. Yeah, okay. I'll better take that, thank you. Okay, so they're in my office, so they're finding stuff that I've not really pre-checked. Oh, no.

It's not a porno, is it? No. It's Reader's wives. It's creative, sweary cats, right? Oh, no, and it says fuck off on it. Yeah, so she said, I've just found this, and I don't think we should have it, and it's got fuck off written on it.

Then the next page is... So what is this? Well, I think Tom Elliott, the guy used to tour management, he bought it for me as an end of tour present because he used to do coloring in, and it says zero fucks-given, asshole, and it's a picture of a cat with its arsonole.

And it's a coloring book. Yeah, bollock, bullshit, damn you. Are they not too bad? Dickhead, fuck face, fuck off, fuck this shit, fuck you. Come, oh. Oh, no, oh, no, that noise. Oh, we're better than that, are we? Oh, come, oh, that's a shame.

Limp dick, motherfucker, nipple dick, piss off slut, twat waffle, wanker. And that's it, yeah. So, yeah, well, thanks for giving it to me. Do you know what? Good honour. Good honour. Yeah. She definitely had a good, I'll read her that.

Yeah, yeah. I hope she didn't go, oh, come, that's a shame. That's a real shame. C-U-M. That's not how it's spelled, Dad. We've all let ourselves down here, haven't we? I mean, that's not great parroted, is it? That I've taken her to work.

She's found a book with cum written in it, and she said, Dad, I don't think we should have this and given it. Who's parenting who? She's not wrong. She's not. She's not wrong. And then I told her for coming up. Anyway, sorry about that.

So we went to digger land. Yes. It is brilliant. It was so hot. It was the hottest day. Was that yesterday? That's meant it was 30 degrees. It was so, I tell you what, Rob.

Yeah. Yesterday was a day. I felt so fucking smug about not living in Victoria Park. Why? But it wouldn't be good to live near Victoria Park when you live near there. No, Rob. Have you been there? Was it too busy?

Oh my God. It's, yeah, it's full. The whole of the Victoria Park Village is full of people buying beer to go and sit in the park. It's just absolutely rammed. And then the park is immovably full. And London is just so fucking hot. London is hot. People don't talk enough about how hot London gets.

You know they talk about how smoggy it was in Victorian times. People need to go, it's going to be a hot day, which will be great for everyone. around at London where it's fucking shit. But what, it's, it's, it's like an absolute furnace. But what the problem is, though, is like when you go to New York gets hot like that, but then the problem in New York is, it's... Get lost to rain in New York, then. No, no, not in the summer, it's red off, but then what happens is you wear shorts and a t-shirt,

and you go into any shop or restaurant or office, and it's freezing with the aircon. Where in London, there's not that much aircon, you just go into a corner shop, or like a off-license, and the chocolate's melting. Oh, there's just a, just a guy just dying, just dying. behind the counter. Boss man's like in a puddle. Yeah. I tell you what.

We went to Chelsea Flower Show on Friday. By we, I mean, me, Emma and Jojo. Oh, yeah, you knew best mates. My new best mates. You rat. He's sniveling little...

Well, was my invite. I looked at my personal phone, my work phone, nothing. Just you being held by a massive man. But even Jojo was sweating. How big's Jojo? By the way, Jojo, if you look beyond the dancing

and the sort of exuberant personality, it could be a heavyweight boxer. He's an absolute unit. His posture is off the charts. This dance in posture, I think, the massive arses and rock hardcore is outrageous. Yeah, even Jojo is sweating at Chelsea Flower Show. Jojo's from South Africa.

Yeah. Like, so it's too hot in London. So what would happen in London is, by now we'd be going, it's going to be almost impossible to go to sleep because our house was boiling. Yes. And we had one aircon unit in my daughter's room. With the tube hanging out the window.

With the tube hanging out the window. And it's so big and heavy. It's a mental. It would be in the corner of the room for 11 months of the year when it's not needed because you couldn't move it somewhere else. It is like a fridge. Yeah. It was unbelievable.

Well, because I panicked bought one of them from curries for like 200 quid. When Lou came back for an operation and I was getting a, and where we used to live, the sun would set in our windows. The rooms were absolutely unbearable. So I bought this one unit. So I had an aircon unit going in the room. And it was when it was like 40 degrees. You know what?

38 degrees, 40 degrees. It was mental. And I had it on full blast at 18 in the room. And the room was still 25 degrees. Oh, my word, Rob. They're just, and it's so heavy. And they're so heavy. So heavy.

And you've got to have the little window open, but you've got to put their little slot through. Yesterday evening, Rob. Do you know what we did? What did you do? My parents, present to my daughter and son for Christmas, which has been a great present, was that they were going to make them a veg garden.

A bit of fucking babysitting now they're nearby. Here we go. Here we bloody go, well, basically. Yeah, pull your finger out. You've done it. You've had six years and half part-time contract. How about you get up here and put a shift in, yeah? It wasn't quite that.

Obviously, you couldn't do it in London. Couldn't do it in London because it was too far. Now we're here, pull your finger out and get babysitting. Is that what you said to him? Was that the present? No, that's not the present, no. No, no. So they've, in the garden.

they've made my daughter and son a veg garden. Ah. And veg and fruits, so they're growing that with them. So they came around at four yesterday. My dad and mum did the garden with my children. So the veg gardens in your garden? In our garden, yeah. Right, so they're present to your children as they're digging holes in your garden.

I knew you're going to find a hole in it. No pun intended. No, so no, I'm only missing. No, that's a lovely thing to do. Good luck with your work foam system, Rob. We're all believe that. No, I'm only, I am digging a hole in it just for, you know, podcast. Podcast fun.

Podcast fun. But there's no point in their house because they won't see the growth every day or be able to do it every day. Exactly. So we just sat out in the garden until about half eight in the evening and it was lovely. And at no point were we thinking, oh my God, you know, it's too hot. We've got to go to bed in a minute. We've got to go to bed in a minute and we're dreading it.

So why is that just exeter, his cooler, and you've got more. space and there's a bit of a breeze because where you were before, you're in a terrace house. A, we've got a garden. Well, you had a garden before, but it's like a pack. Yeah, but it was a, it was the size of this room and it was packed onto other gardens. And it was like a box in patch, yeah. Yeah, so you're not like, this is my oasis. Do you know what I mean?

And there's no breeze. There's no breeze. It's cooler. The whole house is cooler. Because London's so built up is why is your house cooler than, why not it was your house, but why you live is cooler? Because there's not a billion buildings around you. and loads of vehicles and all kinds of things that make it warm, presumably.

Well, yeah, underground, the underground as well. Yeah, so London's just boiling. So it's not as boiling. We've got a lot more room. I had to go and trade in my old iPhone. I just got a lovely bus into town, six minutes, went to the Apple store, did it, came back. Previously, Rob, previously, I'd have been driving to Westfield, struggling to get a parking space. Everyone's in there because it's air-conditioned,

queuing up to get an appointment. Oh, Rob. Exactly. So now your life's much easier and you're not going to have to... Here we go. Here we go. Here we go. Even you now in the mechanics work.

And now you could just really enjoy that when you're getting a train to and from London twice a week, every week forever now. I had a bit of a bad one on Friday, Rob. I had a bad one after Chelsea Flower Show. So you had to go back up to London again? Oh, I popped up for the Chelsea Flower Show because I love Chelsea Flower Show. because I love Chelsea.

I just popped up, a quick six, seven hour journey round trip, pop up. Well, minimum on Friday. It's bank holiday. So Bancoa Friday, what time are you leaving? Two. Yeah, so I went up early, a few hours' Chelsea Flower Show. Yeah.

Get to Paddington, points failure. All the trains are delayed. Luckily, I managed to get one. It's actually earlier than the train I need because it's the one before that's been delayed. I'm winning a life. I like that. That's nice.

Yeah. I'm just chilling. get beyond Reading, train stops, bad news, we're going to have to go back to Reading, we can't proceed. No, no one never wants to go back to Reading, no offence Reading. Go back to Reading, can't proceed. Oh. So I go back to Reading. Everyone gets detrained, as they say.

Go to Platform 12 or whatever. We get to Platform 12. It is two sets of people on one trade. Yeah. You know, Ivory Tower concerns. I'm thinking it's fine. I've got a first-class ticket. And because you do the last leg,

and some people presume that you're disabled, do you ever maybe start a little limp towards a seat and they just assume you might be Brooker? No, I've never been a mistake for Alex Brunter. Because I've been accused of being you and disabled numerous a time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like they've said you're Josh Whitcomb and put me in accessibility room in hotels more than once. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, no, that hasn't. I didn't do that because, you know, I'm a public figure and trains we've all seen, you know, you don't want to sit in the wrong clothes. You don't want strictly star stealing seat in disability claim. Before you know it, Rob, I've decided, I think it's fine. I'm first class here, Rob. I've paid the extra.

Here we go. You should have space. I get to first class. Yeah. There's no space. I sit on the floor, do the full Jeremy Corbyn, because I don't want to stand up for three hours. So I make a space amongst the luggage on the floor.

See, I sit on the luggage rack, the top bit of the luggage rack. What? The thing above people? No. You just lie in there. Just a little coughing liar. No, no. On South Eastern trains.

I'd love to get on a train. You're like. Bit snug, isn't it? Where you been? Just been down a flower show, Jojo and Emma. Pass me a fucking tea up here. Anyone got any red bush? I'm gasping.

Boiling up here. No, on the South. So they've got like, because it's a commuter train, they've got like a little luggage rack that's about as wide as your shoulders and about as deep as you just thought of the thighs. So it's like, it's where you put like little backpacks rather than big suitcases. Yeah, right.

Yeah, no, no, they haven't got that on GWR. And I sometimes used to jump up and snuggle in there. Yeah, yeah. No, so I'm on the floor, lent on a bag, thinking obvious jealousy to the people in the chairs, but then gloriously, three old people get on. Yeah. And they go, we're going to need three people to leave their seats.

Oh. And the tension in the room is incredible. How old are these people, though? Oh, definitely. There's no question. There's no way they're standing. And then these people have to move. So then I'm thinking I'm sat on the floor here for three hours here.

Yeah. And then we're left for half an hour still haven't left. And then they declare there's another train going to exit. Anyone who's going to exit and move on to this train. So I run across the other platform. get a seat, my third train home. And what time did that leave after your, was that much? I got home at 6pm.

I got to Paddington at half one. Right. Cool. Yeah. And then I was going to the beach. Well, it's good because going forward, you won't be needing to get the train on Fridays and Saturday, so you should be fine.

I'll be fine, yeah. Yeah. I'm getting the train up first thing on Friday. That's what I'm doing. Okay. Yeah, with my work and personal phone in either pocket. Oh, one in each pocket and two separate headphone cases. one for personal, one for business.

Oh yeah, of course you'll have to do that. Absolutely. This episode is brought to you by new personal non-bio, ultra-stain removal capsules. Josh, how much washing do you think you guys get through? Oh, mate, so much. Because you're kids, right? Obviously, it's not like they're keeping their clothes clean as their priority. Do you know what I mean?

No. Having fun is their priority. Yes. So you could be getting through more than one outfit in the day because, you know, they'll go play in the garden, they'll jump on the trampoline, but it'll be muddy to get to the trampoline or whatever. But you've got to just accept that because that's being a kid. Do you know what I mean?

You don't want it to be going to your kid. Oh, this is important. You want them to be enjoying their life, right? Well, and I got my daughter that hot chocolate. She had a white jumper on and was driving along. I was like, I was not a hot chocolate if you want. And I was like, she's definitely going to spill that on a jumper. But I'm like, do you want to be the dad that's like, take the jumper off,

put it aside because you might spill it, drink it. You're like, no, just let her learn. Let it dribble down the top. We can wash it when you get home. Exactly. because that stain, Rob, says I'm having a fun time. Yes. Your grass stains on your trousers.

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Exactly. Try new personal non-bio, ultra-stain removal capsules. Ultra-stain removal with a gentle touch on sensitive skin. Always keep away from children. So the other thing is, we went to the beach on Friday night after school. Ah! Exmouth Beach, had a lovely time. Oh, so my daughter and her friend were doing a gymnastics and dance display for us.

Yeah. And my daughter said, oh, Dad, Daddy, could you announce it like you're hosting strictly? and I was like, I'm not going to do that. Oh. Because if anyone sees me and goes, do you know what? I walk past Josh Riddickam. He was making his family play that he was the host of Strictly. Yeah, but you are, you're not playing, you are, it's practice.

No, but I'm mad. You know, he was unveiled as the host Strictly. Three days later, he's got his family on the beach, and he's making them practice his street. No, I think, do it. Also, we have got the good thing now about podcasts, and social media is you've now got a platform to explain what you're doing. So no one, if anyone, because now, if people read a newspaper headline of you or Emma or or anyone in the public eye, what I do is if there's a mad claim, Josh Whitacom in

crazy, strictly performance on beach in front of children, I just think, well, that's obviously not what's happened. That's just the headline they've done to do clipmate. So I'll read it. And then I'll find whoever they're talking about on their social media and see the clip explaining what's gone on. Yeah. So this is my version of that.

Yeah. So there you go. But yeah, I did do it slightly. I did the voiceover bit. It isn't me. You know, the dancing. Oh, go on. Give us a little blast.

Give us a little blast. Dancing the cha-cha is Robin Lou. Ah, we've not danced for years. So then we went to Diggerland on Saturday. Nice. He's great. Let me show you one of the rides, Rob. Let me show you one of the rides.

So have they got rides? I just thought you just got in Diggers and moved dirt. Well, this is a digger meets a ride. Okay. Do you want me to send this to your personal or to a business? Business. is a strictly business interaction. No, no, but now I'd have my work phone with me because I'm at work.

Yeah, of course. No, I know. So, this is the ground shuttle. Oh, so it's like, Rose is absolutely loving it. So it's a digger lifting up what is a massive palette with people on. Yeah. And he's just driving you around on a bit of mud. Just swinging them around and bounce them up and down.

I wouldn't call that a ride. They were loving it. It looks mental. Yeah. What a job. How has that got parks health and safety? Oh, he did a great, he did a great bit of patter before and. It looks about a thousand degrees.

It looks like you're like, you know, like a dust bowl in Spain. Yeah. He did a great bit of patter before and he said, if anyone has a problem during the ride, put your hands up and I'll ignore you. Bit of fun. There we go. So where are you on this ride? Is that you filming Rose on it?

No, because I was filling the car with presents and then I came back. And suddenly everyone was on this ride And I wasn't, so I just filmed it. That's so funny. That's great fun. So where is Diggerland? That one was in Columpton, but there's ones all around the country.

You are? Columpton. They love it down there, didn't they? Yeah. Don't you all chuck a P and a B in any word? Any word they can find. Oh, there's one in Kent. There's one in Kent.

Half an hour from me. There you go. I might just take the kids Diggerland. on a surprise mission. Do it. I'm not at the photo, isn't it? They are really, there's a lot of diggers. Yeah.

Do you know what? I know this sounds mad because it's called Diggerland. I didn't expect it to be as Diggery as it was. It's so digger. There's so many diggers. I thought there'd be like little diggers. We got to add a go on a digger as well, picking up, like, doing the thing and picking up dirt.

It was great. What must it feel like for a builder to take? their kids there. I know. To pay, to do that when it's like, I could just bring them to work. There was loads of really ripped bloaks, Rob. Yeah, but Diggerland's quite alpha, isn't it? It's like, if you're proper alpha male, you're like, I'm not going to Lego land, I'll go Diggerland. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's a bit more geyser, isn't it? Yeah, my boys into diggers. Yeah. Yeah, we've been like you, or you and your tribe. Yeah, exactly. So it was fun. Tell me about your parenting. Well, I've got another idea for a bit of correspondence. Okay.

I've got an example of it, and you can tell me, I'm going to call it, Solidarity or Solid Karen. Right, okay. Here we go. So basically, I told someone an issue about their child and sort of by the, and their parenting, but I don't know if I was a show of solidarity as another parent or it was solid Karen. What did you say? This is huge.

Yeah, I know. It's quite fun. So this wasn't someone from school? No, this is separate. Stranger. Stranger danger. So I'm paying for my parking in a car park. and then there's a car, it's really hot, 30 degrees,

like probably 11am, but about 28 degrees, 11am to set this in half 11. I know it is actually, because I drop the kids. Anyway, walk past a car. All the windows are open. There's a sort of looks like a grandmother in the front passenger seat, just reading a book, sunglasses on chilling out. Behind her is one and a half three old asleep in the car seat

with the window open, yeah? Yeah. Fully Sparko, but laying there, the sun is directly on the baby. just face like full pelt nothing shielding it like that so i was like that that is going to burn that kid's face off unless the kid's got cream on but even with cream you shouldn't let a baby sleep in direct sun yeah so i'm like right do i say something so where's the driver where's the mum don't know where the mum or the dad is or the granddad in the shop i imagine shopping it's just an

empty car no no no the nans in the front see oh right okay so there's a grandmother i think or an older mom in the passenger seat, just reading whilst they've got, I'll stay with the baby, you go and do the shopping. Oh, okay, yeah. Sun's right on the baby's face. So I'm like, well, maybe the sun moved a bit or whatever, or they're oblivious. So I just went, oh, just so you know,

the sun's right on their face while they're sleeping. Yeah, I think that's fair. And she went, oh, okay, thanks. And then I walked off, but I was like, I don't know where that lies. I think that's fine, because I don't think you've gone in and you've gone. excuse me, you're burning your child's head. You need to deal with this because this is unacceptable what you're doing.

Yeah, that's Karen, isn't it? I think what I did was raise awareness for them. Yeah. Because when I went off, they did go to the door and get like a muslin and put it, you know, the classic, put it in the door so it hangs down with shade. So I think you're in the right there, Rob, because you handled it in the right way because you are criticising her, obviously. Yes, but file it under solidarity.

So if I came to your tour show And I said That routine about You know Car boot sales Simply isn't good enough That would be bad But if I said

Have you ever thought about Maybe Putting a better observation At the start of that Carboot sale routine And it might help it throughout Now do you know what I'd say to you I'd say

Should you be on a train at Paddington home Rather than bothering me After my show Yeah, you'd be right. No, but then I did think though, Josh, if she said no, the baby's fine. Then then you're in a tricky position. I would have said something. I would have gone, well, the baby's not and you're a terrible parent.

That child needs shade. Yeah. And if you don't put shade on that child, I'm going to take down your details, your card registration and report you to the social services. Now get the muslin out and put the shade up. Yeah. Anyway, send in your solidarity or solid Karen's whether you've done it or had it done to you,

and then we can decide if it's solidarity or solid Karen. I think a lot of it's down to the phrasing, isn't it? It's not the what, it's not the request, it's the phrase. Yes. Do you know what I mean? It's how you frame it. Oh, I don't know if you know, but the baby's faces in the sun, just to let you know.

That's nice, wasn't it? I did it. Okay, so I'm not a solid Karen. So what do you think has happened? The mum's gone in or the dad, and the grand's been left in the car. And probably oblivious to the sun on the, child's face. Yeah, exactly. So just, you know, multi-generational bad parenting. Hey, it happens.

Multi-generational bad parenting. Exactly. Exactly. That's, you know, it's a story as old as time. Sometimes the mother-in-law and the father and the father-in-law don't know best. But you know who knows best? Bobby B. That's right. Exactly. So what are you doing for half-term? Have you got plans for half-term or are you winging it? No, we're having a chilled one because Lou's working and I'm working. So it's a lot of like logistics. So, because it was hot on yesterday, we had a little barbecue in the garden and I put a sprinkler up. Then today we're doing the podcast.

And then this afternoon we're going to Tom Allen's got a book out, Common Decency, which I started reading. And it's absolutely brilliant. I meant to Instagram about that, but I's deleted my Instagram. He's like Alan Bennett for a new generation. He is. With just such vivid description of sort of mundane normal life.

Yeah. This is what I sent to him about it, because I actually am really enjoying it, and I struggle with novels sometimes. I said, you paint such a beautiful alluring and funny picture of what could be a boring suburban street. It's a real skill, such a USP, making the mundane exciting. I think this could be your true calling. I hate all the spy action dragon novels. Too hard to imagine a dragon, but I can already picture your characters.

And if you can do that to someone with ADHD and dyslexia, then all the novel fans are going to jizz everywhere. Oh, that's nice. Yes, it is brilliant. He wouldn't put that quote on the book. No, of course. But, you know, each of their own. you know, he put you on the back of the book. Don't worry about it.

No problem. So he's having a little book celebration. So we're going to his garden in the afternoon. Oh, nice. Then tomorrow we go into the neighbours. They've got a big paddling pool and they're going to have a barbecue there. Tuesday, we're having a chill day. I go to work.

Lou comes back from her trip. Then Lou's taking them out somewhere Wednesday for a day trip. And then Thursday, I think they're just chilling at home. Then Friday, I'm back in the game. Lou's doing a book. tour at Hay on Wire Festival. And I'm taking them to my mum and dads for a day trip down to Margate. And then Saturday, Sunday, we've got just a chilled weekend.

We're just trying to, they're so tired, the kids. Yeah. So we're just trying to relax and float about and with no plans. I think it's nicer sometimes, especially when the weather's like this. Okay, now for a special part of the show called Holiday Heaven, where we give you our top tips and tricks for making the most out of your holiday and your money whilst you're there. And it's brought to you by Monzo.

You can pay with your Monzo card anywhere in any currency with no foreign transaction fees. Now, Rob, I know you're going to like these words. Let's talk about holidays. Oh, it's what I live for. It's what you live for. You hate your mundane experience, don't you, Rob? You live to be away.

I love a holiday. It's our favourite things. At the age of 40, I've worked myself in a position to have, I'd say, slightly fancy holidays than I used to have. However, still one of my favorite holidays ever when I was, I think I was 22, 21, I went around Europe on the trains. I got that ticket.

I don't think they'd do it anymore where you've got unlimited train travel. So that was like a few hundred quid. And then the rest of the time, we were in hostels, we were eating food and getting food from supermarkets and stuff like that. And that was a proper adventure. I loved it. At one point, I was getting crisps and scooping out cream cheese with the crisps for my dinner. I don't, I don't consider that a tip.

I don't know if that's a holiday. Don't consider that a holiday. But this is the thing, right? Yeah. Holidays are not just about spending loads of money. Like when I was a kid, I remember we used to go to Wales, South Wales, Pembrokeshire, lovely. Yeah. My dad would like get the amount of cash out for the holiday because it was a cash society in those days.

Oh, absolutely, yeah. And then he'd know how much cash for the holiday. It's a good way of doing it. Put the amount of money aside for the holiday. But now in Monzo, you can do that in Monzo. Exactly. And then you know where you are with the holiday. You're not working on a day-to-day basis.

You've got the holiday's budget and you can just roll with it. Well, we thought what we did with my mates. We all agreed what our budget was going to be. So we all agreed we're going to spend X amount a day. And then we had an amount and then we knew that that would cover us for that amount of time. Because what you don't want go traveling with someone that's got loads more money than you and then it feels a bit awkward where someone wants to stay here or there. Exactly.

So we've sort of found that challenge of like trying to find a cheap pint. It's part of the deal of them. You know, we've got X amount a day to go travelling. Also, Rob, do you want a money saving tip? Go on. If you're at a place for the breakfast buffet, steal some bloody pastries for the rest of the day, mate. Come on. I do that.

I always make a little plain, a little plain baguette where I'd basically fill it with all the lovely, delicious stuff from breakfast and then eat it on the plane and everyone be jealous of my plane baguette. I did that on the way back from Seville. That's totally within the rules. That's totally. within the rules. Also, it's good for kids because they're not hungry,

but you know they're going to be desperate for a cross-on in about an hour. Exactly, exactly. Also, what we do is when we go to hotel, sometimes you go to like an all-inclusive or a half-bored hotel where you get the food, but sometimes kids want snacks and they want sweets and treats that aren't always at the hotel. Google the local supermarket, have a little trip out.

That's what we do as well with inflatables. In the hotels are always really expensive. But if you find a little shop nearby, go and buy a cheaper inflatable there. What do you think the biggest travel? rip-off is, though, Rob. Hotel minibars still stress me out. I don't think if I was Jeff Bezos, I would still be able to justify

using hotel minibar. It's a principal thing, isn't it? I know that Kit Kat is not four pounds at the shop I can see from a window. I can't spend £3.50 on a packet of crisps, whatever my financial situation. Now, Josh, I hope some of that is of some use to the listeners. I think it is.

And with Monzo, you can spend on your card just as you do at home and there's no surprises. You'll get instant spend notifications, showing what you're spending in local currency in pounds, and you'll see the real-time exchange rates in the app as you spend. So you know exactly how much you spend on slushies and pull flow teas. Monzo download your new favourite bank. To apply for a Monzo current account, you must be 16 plus and a UK resident T's and C's apply. Hey, y'all's Kelly Clarkson with Wayfair. Ever order furniture online and wonder what if? Like, what if it doesn't hold up?

That sofa was four days old. You should have ordered from Wayfair. With Wayfair, there's no what if. Just style you love and quality you can trust. Visit Wayfair.ca. Wayfair, every style, every home. Well, I'm very excited. I'm quite interested to see how this holiday plays out

because they're a lot more confident as swimmers than they were last year. And so I'm wondering if I'm not going to be having to go in every single time. Do you know what I mean? Can I tell you where you're going to be? Set on the edge of the pool where you're feet in. Yeah. Watching.

I'll tell you that. Close enough to jump in, but you're not in-in-in. Yeah. Someone walking past going, do you know what? You want to get some shade on that, Dad? Because that Dad is getting absolutely belted in the sun. Get a muslin over with that. Get a big hat.

You need a big bucket hat. That's what you need. I'm not sure if I do need a big bucket hat, yeah. But I am looking forward to it. We don't know to stop you burning. No, I know. I know, but I don't know whether I'd go bucket out. Maybe I'd go with one of those.

You need a nice holiday after all the touring and all the work. I know. Rose has already kind of said, you know, it's been a tough few months for her. So I think I'm going to have to take quite a lot of the strain on the holiday. And I think that's fair. Yeah. She's done most of the parenting. You've done no parenting.

Well, no, I have done some parenting. I videoed them on a digger yesterday. I'd say you've done really, you've done actually less than me, which is almost impossible the last few months. Well, yes. but that's because my tour was slightly jutting out at the end of yours, wasn't it? So I was still touring when you weren't. Yeah.

Yeah. But let's not point fingers. But second half of the year is more or less clear. I'll stop saying that because it's definitely not. You've just got the biggest job in TV. Well, Director General of the BBC? Well, give it time. You're a couple of chachars away from that.

In my experience of hosting strictly? If I was Director General of the BBC, I'd resign within a week because I would be so bad at it. too much stress. Too many meetings. Too much stress. I can't do serious. Imagine having to do press where you have to be serious rather. I know. You did very well on Good Morning Britain the other week, by the way, like a politician that was. It was a little slippery ill.

Oh, thank you. Yeah, that was fun, wasn't it? I loved what you said about the, um, uh, a perfect couple and you was alluring to Ed Bulls and Susanna Reed. Took them too long to clock. I know. It was slightly annoying. I'm like, come on guys. Come on, guys. Way too long to clock. You were really doing some. work. Come on, guys. Do you want me to spoon feed you this fucking joke, Ed?

Do you want me in the middle, Ed? How about you get your eyes open and it is open? Don't worry about what you're saying next. Yeah? You booked a comedian last time I checked, but turns out you're treating me like you've booked Neil Kinnock. Come on, Ed. Jeez.

Ballsy weren't letting you go, was he? What do you think this is? It's a joke. It's a joke, Ed. Come on. Come on, Ed. Let's have a laugh. And you, Sue.

Anna. Yeah. She was sort of a bit more, but he was a dog with a bone. You weren't getting an exclusive out of old Jay Doubbers. No, you worry about that. He's too long in the tooth. I've learned from the best, Ed. You.

You, Ed, and we got loads from you. Oh, I burnt all the hairs on my arms doing a barbecue yesterday. Oh, no. Oh, no. So I had these all weird little frazzles on my arms. I've got bald arms. Oh, no. I know.

It's weird, isn't it? I've done it. That's normal. But it's weird that we've looped back to hairless at the end. of the pod. It is, isn't it? Before we know it, Lou's going to come home to Rob,

scorching all the hairs off himself over the barbecue, suspending himself, bum first over the barbecue. It'll be easier. Maybe I should just lean my back on the barbecue and burn it off. Exactly. It'd be easier.

Everyone's a winner. Oh, dear. I mean, we watch Grease, the girls are well into Greece, the film, they love it. Not the new film. It's been out forever. But we watched that.

Did they enjoy it? They loved it. Love Greece. Great. What's the premise of Greece? Danny Zucco and Sandy have a summer romance and I think it's all over then they meet again at high school

even though they're all 48 and basically he's a cool guy and a gang and she's a bit of a sort of you know bookish boffing and then he's sort of scared to be nice to her because he's getting peered pressure from all the other grease balls

Great slide man yeah and then he basically tries to be more straight edge by going you know being in the football and sports teams and all that. And then she becomes a bit more rock and roll. And in the end, she starts smoking and wears sexy clothes and they'll get off. And then for some reason,

the car flies off in the end. Apologies for spoiler alerts. But if you haven't seen Greece now, you never will. No, exactly. Do you know what, Danny and Sandy do there, Rob? They meet in the middle like I wanted Ed's balls to do with me with my joke. He's in it for the scoop. You're in it for the laughs.

Exactly. Do you know what? We're all doing our jobs. We were all doing our jobs. And then we all went home. I thought, do you know what, I did a good job today. Yeah. I'm going to give a quick shout out to Eagle Eye oven cleaning.

They come and did my barbecue again, absolutely faultless service. I gave them a small business shout out before. They get rid of the burned hair off it. Yeah, well, no, I burnt air afterwards. So if you come around for a barbecue this year, it might be a bit hairy, but that's on you. But I paid for it. I paid them. This is not, I'm not getting freebies here.

Here's a normal one. Here's a normal one. Here we go. Hello, Rob, Josh and Michael. Big fan of the podcast. I discovered it when on maternity leave with my first child. back in 2021. Now attempted to go back and listen to the first episodes I missed.

Don't bother. Don't bother. No, please do. It's all streams. It's all money in our pocket, Josh. Of course. Does it count, Michael, if they listen to old ones again? Point one of a penny.

Thank you very much. Absolutely, it counts. And I would encourage everyone. Yeah. It counts. Get on that. I tell you what. Here's a small business shout out.

Perrin and hell the early series. Get on them. Listen back. Get on there. Anyway, I would have a small business shout out, please. I have just set up a small business. selling responsibly made backpacks. Our brilliant backpacks are made from recycled ocean-bound plastic to help prevent plastic waste-waste, rechiny oceans in areas where waste management is limited.

Our backpacks are designed to be practical yet stylish with useful pockets, a laptop pouch and super comfortable with a padded back. We're called Olive and Rufus and can be found at Olive and Rufus.com Or Olive and Rufus on Insta. I'm mum to a three and five-year-old, so it's quite the juggle. I've got a feeling there might be called Oliver Rufus, but I'm just assuming. It's been a juggle launching a business and looking after our energetic two. A juggle, I'm sure lots of your listeners can relate to.

Work, children, life. Thank you so much, Emma. There you go. There you go. Oliver, oh, they're nice, Oliver and Rufus. Nice backpacks. Reasonably priced as well, 65 pounds for a nice, well-made,

responsibly made backpack. There we go. Lovely. Hi, Rob and Josh. I'd like to shout out my dear friend, Tom's small business killer trails. Tom has created murder mystery trails in some of the UK's best cities. If you want to see all the highlights of a UK city and you're into murder mysteries and escape rooms, these are for you. Perfect whether on a weekend get away with family, friends, stags,

hens, etc. Tom quit his job three years ago to focus solely on his killer trails and he's poured his heart into making these unforgettable experiences. He even gives a percentage of the property to children in need because he's a legend. Oh. Can find the trails on Insta at Killer Trails or or KillerTrails.com. Okay. Thanks to the Lowell's Lucy in Hampshire. Nice.

Oh, I'm just looking at these backpacks. They've got a well-good bit on it where, you know, when you have your little wheelie case, if you're traveling a lot. Yeah. It's got a little strap across so you can just put the backpack on that. Oh, lovely. Lovely. Lovely stuff. Anyway, good luck, everyone.

Josh, I'll speak to you soon. Have a brilliant holiday. Have a nice rest. I'll let you know how it went. Oh, please do. I will. I'll see you soon. Bye.

Bye.