Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S12 EP5: The kind way is often worse

Episode Date: January 20, 2026

More misadventures in parenting, life, and beyond with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe... it's January so Josh has over booked himself and might be having a manic episode. You can listen to Josh's new podcast⁠⁠ ⁠ 'Museum of Pop Culture'⁠⁠⁠ wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes released twice a week. Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Please subscribe and leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: [e-mail] Follow us on instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@parentinghell⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This episode, Josh, is brought to you by my friend and yours, the Apple Watch. Let's have a look. I actually got one on. There you go. It's actually mine that. He loves the product. He loves the product so good. He bought it himself.

What? The little will. It feels like I'm a DJ mixing. Oh, very nice. Now, Josh, have you set yourself any new resolutions? Yes, I have. Yes, I'm trying to get trim again. Like...

Trim. Yeah, like when I did Strictly. Do you remember how trim I was there? Yeah, yeah. You're strictly, buddy. When you did Strictly for a week and a half of the Christmas special. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

When I was trim for a week. week and a half. Well, did you know, the thing is about New Year's resolutions, Josh. Have you heard about Quitters Day? No, tell me about Quitters Day. Well, basically, Quitter's day is the second Friday in January. Yeah. That's where most people give up. Oh, that's a bit sad, isn't it? It is sad, isn't it? So what can we do about it? Apple Watch. Go on. Tell me. Tell me. This little bad, I'm on a fitness journey. Yeah. By the time I'm 40, I want a six-pack. You're already 40. Yeah, I know. So I've got a year to go. So I've got time. Yeah, yeah, fine. This little fella's going to get me there. Okay, tell me how. Activity rings. Oh, yeah. What's

that means. Tells me what I'm doing. Walking. I played five of us on football the other day. I clicked outdoor football. They told me how many calories I burnt, how much running I was doing. Oh, that's nice.

It didn't tell me how good my goals were, but you know, it's a different kind of tech. It's got a little trainer. I went for a run. He goes, well done. You've done the kilometer. That's nice.

Keep going. This is your, you need that, don't you? Because it gets lonely. Very lonely on the road. Very lonely, pounding the pavements. Mounted the pavements,

yeah. That is a mind-blowing amount of helpful features. It means you have no excuse not to be fit by the end of 40. Quick, quitting with Apple Watch, Josh. Exactly. Search Apple Watch Series 11 to find out more. Hello, you're listening to Parenting Hell with.

Freya, can you say Rob? Rock. Beckett. Beckett. Sophia, can you say Josh? Widicum. Widdick. Yay.

Go ahead. Again. Yeah. Do you know what, Ron? I just realized, I mean, go on. You're in love with me. Well, no, I hadn't known that for years. Imagine if we got married, but we had no sex, which I think we'd both be in favour of.

How do you think we get on? That sounds like marriage. Am I right? I'm sure I could stretch to that. And what's the bit that I've got to imagine? Yeah. Oh, do you know what? It's so much fun going to work and just being funny someone else that's funny.

Isn't it? Yeah, how much better one? Get the people that want to do their own show. You know what I mean? I like being near really funny people or at least interviewing them. How would you reckon we'd get on day to day? What would, we'd go football?

Yeah, it'd be nice. We'd watch the football. I'd go out on the piss and you'd stay out home and read. Yeah, I'd struggle with that. I struggle when Rose's out. I will admit, I struggle to go to sleep when Rose is not there. But then you struggle to go to sleep with Fon's there. Yeah, no, no, no, it's not because Rose is not there.

It's when I know someone's coming in. especially I think if you're waiting for a woman to come home on like the train or in a taxi. I feel like... I'm not looking forward to that with kids, with like teenagers. No. But I like booking Lou and Uber because then I can track it and I know what's going on. Yeah, so you know she's not going to someone else's house. Well, you know, she can't she wants, but as long as she tells me she's there,

another man's house. As long as she doesn't kick her out after they've had sex. I'm happy. So, what were you... Right, so I'll just see this. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I need to see this. What I was going to say is, what's bad is now we've got to remember when that clip's playing out, Rob, we are on camera.

Because what the viewer will have seen is you reading the CBB's thing you wanted to tell me. Yeah. And me moving a tea bag with my fingers from a mug into an old glass of water. Are you suggesting that over the last five years, when you've played these random clips of kids talking, we may not be that fully listening. and just sort of go, oh, lovely. Yeah, we might not look like we're listening. Yeah, yeah, yeah, even though we're listening deeply. Yeah, yeah, subconsciously.

But that's, because we've been doing this so long now, we can operate at a level that to the new. Yeah. They don't like to paying any attention to that voice, but actually we are. Yeah, so if you're listening, if you're just listening to this, as is most people, then I think,

then we were really listening intently. If you're watching, then I hope you enjoyed that. Maybe give us a rating out of 10 to how much we look like we were and we'll try and make sure we improve. Yeah. Hi, Rob, Josh and Michael. These are my 23-month-old daughters, Frere and Sophia. Oh, that's very nice, posh names.

I have listened to you since I had my first daughter, Georgia, four and a half years ago. And you have helped keep me sane after having twin girls nearly two years ago. We were told an eight-week scan that our second pregnancy with a singleton pregnancy, so imagine our absolute shock when at 12 weeks two babies appeared on the screen at the ultrasound. A singleton pregnancy. I've never heard that phrase before. I think because it's assumed, isn't it? Yeah.

Thank God I was already laying down for the news. Shout out to all the twins and multiple parents out there who are just taking each day, sometimes our, as it comes and really demonstrating the meaning of survival. A tip for people expecting twins. You'll need some noise-canceling earpod stroke headphones. It takes the edge off slightly. Nearly two years later and we are not over the shock

and we've somehow managed to start thriving. Keep it sexy and relatable. Emma in Houghton Regis, Bedfordshire. Never heard of it in my life. No, that's been made up, I think. Yeah. Now, Josh, I was a bit distracted when Freya and Sophia were talking to apologies for that, but I will listen back and really, really.

You always listen and look back, don't you? Like pepadiola watching the match. Yeah, because obviously after this, we'll do a two-hour debrief. We'll go through the tapes. And pitch some ideas for next week and then we'll go, right, right. They're the initial ideas, so they're not good enough. Put them in the bin and we start again. Now, talking about putting stuff in the bin,

I think this might get deleted by C.B.B.'s HQ. On this, I'd like to say that in general, maybe our wives are more of the default parent and do more of the parenting, because we've traditionally been the main... Speak yourself. Well, no, but we're out working. I've done 93% of the parenting. What this week or in total? In total.

Yeah, okay, fair enough. Well, CBB's HQ have released this Instagram post. That's a joke. Already panic in. Yeah, already fan. And it says, send this to a new dad or dad to be who needs the reminder from looking after your well-being to simple ways to get more involved in parenthood, helping out. And it says, another man holding a baby and says, doing chores. Remembering to look after yourself, dealing with well-meaning visitors, celebrating the small wins.

Right, those little points are fine. But helping out, it's not helping out. Helping out. It's your child. Wow. How's that gone down? Have you found that on Instagram or have you Have you come up on Instagram

I think Catherine Ryan has shared it And said laugh out loud And then Lou's check my wife Lou's shared it as well So generally thought this was a joke And Lou said repeat after me It's good promo for Lou's book It's not helping out when it's your own child and family They're not helping out

They are doing what they should be doing Stop praising men for the bare minimum I imagine that'll get deleted soon do you think with this podcast sometimes we get praised for the for what you'd hope would be most men? Yes, sometimes people are like, oh, it's great to hear two dads who are interested, you know, who are committed to parents. I don't think we're doing anything special. I think we're doing what we should be doing. But some people will occasionally say to Lou, oh, it's quite funny.

She goes, oh, isn't Rob Good? Yeah. It doesn't he do a lot? And then that you all will go, oh, my husband wouldn't do any of that. And then Lou will say, well, that's because I didn't marry a dick. head or something like that. Not to them. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's because, you know, like, you know. And sometimes she does think she married a dickhead as well. Yeah, I know, but I'm pretty, quite a lovable dickhead. You are a lovable dickhead. I've worked out the question, by the way. I heard someone ask it to someone on the radio. And I was like... What question?

Well, and I was like, oh my God. I get asked that so often in interviews. And it's the most... It's the shittest most pointless question. in the history of promo. Okay, go on. And I want to know whether you get asked this about Robin Ramesh or about this. Go on.

Or about stand-up. When you started Robin Ramesh, did you ever imagine how successful it could be? I get asked that all the time about this. When you started parenting how, I bet you couldn't imagine how successful it would be, could you? And you're like, no, of course I fucking didn't. But also, if I did.

Also, what I meant to say? Yeah. Yes, because when I did the first pilot, I thought it would run for 14 years. Yeah, exactly. I could sense it. But I heard someone being asked it about a show on the radio on the weekend. And they did the same fucking response I do every time, which is, no, you just couldn't imagine that. Of course, because who does?

Anyway, sorry. Now, I'm going to say something that may not paint me in a great light. But when you started Robin Romer, you did imagine how big it could be. No. but when I started... Of course you imagine it in your wildest dream. Do you know what I mean?

But like... No, not with TV shows. I think with any TV shows or podcast, it is just a little bit of a lottery. There's some amazing shows that never get picked up that you do and you go, this is brilliant. It's great. And stuff that changes or whatever.

And then, you know, commissioners change or the market change, whatever. So, but when I did stand up, I remember once we and Lou were going to like a premiere of something and I just sold out the Amazon for Apollo and all this. And it was in a fancy car. And I said to her, God, I can't, did you ever believe? I never believe, I never thought we'd be doing this one day.

Yeah. And then just, I said that because I felt like that's the thing I should say. But then I'll reflect it on it. I thought, no, I actually did think this was going to happen. Well, that exact. But can I finish? Can I finish in defense myself? No, but I agree with you.

But that, because when I did stand up, what we're lucky with is stand up. It's a very tangible thing that when you're on the circuit, you can hear. at how many laughs people are getting and how you're going down and it's easy to compare. And from an early age, I was aware that I'm pretty solid at this. And as I moved up the ranks, I was still getting as big laughs, if not bigger laughs, than establish people. And it gets easier. And then I could see a path for me based on other people and their benchmarks to go,

no, actually, if I continue at this level and doing what I'm doing, I should get to that stage. So I think that's a bit of a clearer path than like a TV show. Also to agree with you, to agree with you on that, right, when you start stand up, of course you imagine that, because otherwise you wouldn't start stand up. Because that is all the standup I've consumed is all on television. I didn't know comedy clubs existed. So it would have been, I thought you do open mic and then your fame. I didn't realize there was the bit in the middle.

So I wasn't like, I want to get to a level of comedy club because I didn't know it existed. Do you know, I mean? You have to have that almost mental. self-belief to put up with all the shit gigs to get through. But as you do all those gigs, you learn that, oh, actually I'm quite good at this, and then you have actual confidence because you've seen it in real life happening kind of thing. Totally. I don't know.

What we've done there has managed to look incredibly humble, but also two of the most arrogant people that have ever lived. And do you know what I find it? That's the truth of human beings, well. Actually, that does bring me on. So I've got quite a bit to talk to you this week. Oh, you've got notes. I've got notes. What's on the notes?

I normally write. So, there's two things, basically, two major things. I want you to talk cats. Cat updates. Cats. Cats, sorry. Trilby. I'm thinking of getting a hat.

I think they're going to get in a bowl of hat and a cane. Just want a thing. I'm sick of my thing being a little bit nerdy and techsat, like wired headphones. I want a thing that takes attention away from me being a bit neurotic. I'm going to get a hat. It worked for Jamiroquai. Will it work for me? Jamiriqui, the Queen she used to always wear a hat and me.

Yep. So, the cat's situation, Rob. Oh, they've been introduced, Beryl, Fluffball, and what's the one called Dean? Tilly. Tilly. Dean. So. Dean.

Great name for a cat, Dean. It's been really, actually, no, what I'm going to do, I'll take you through my week sequentially. Quick question. Are they all still alive? They're all still alive at the time of recording. Brilliant. Yeah, though, last night. Beryl, we were talking about vet problems.

Oh God, what happened? Are we going to get onto that? Let's start from the start of the week, okay? Yeah. So Monday, I recorded the first ones of these with you. We're doing a bit of catch-up here, right? Yeah. Tuesday, so I did a lot of promo last week, Rob.

Yes, for your Mr. Blobby podcast. Yeah. Well, it's not all Mr. Blobby. That was the first episode. We moved on Stockhead and Warmer now. What's next week? What's next week? David Hasselhoffin, whether he bought down the Berlin War.

Did he? You'll have to listen to find out. Okay. Right. So, you know, when I was, in the last episode, I was saying, do you think you're having a manic episode? I was asking the same question to myself. Yeah, I think I already knew that you were.

Yeah, yeah. So on Tuesday, I did a local radio for an hour and a half. From home. From home in eight minute chunks. Okay. So imagine the same interview at the same interview 12 times. Just with a different accent. Just with a different accent.

Also, they're dropping in the tour, but I never know where I'm going in that region because I've got no idea, A, where I'm going and which ones correspond to which region of the country. And also, it's eight minutes bang, bang, bang, it's too much to be across. Yeah, exactly. And also, I find local radio accents, I don't know, it's because of local radio, their accent goes up a notch, or they do actually talk like that. It's quite an intensely strong accent. that when you're jumping from Scouse to Jolie to be, it's hard to jump between the accents.

Yeah, so it was intense. So I could have an hour-long chat with a schizophrenic that does all accents. It is like having an hour-long chat with the skittling who does all the accents. Yeah. A bit like this. So then I get Rose on Tuesday. Rose on Sunday has got ill, right? She's got either horrific.

Rose on Sunday sounds like Channel 4 show. Rose on Sunday. Yeah, that was some more promo I was doing Rose on Sunday. So she's either got gastroenteritis or she's had the worst food poisoning on her. We thought it was gastroenteritis, but no one else gets it throughout the week. So on Sunday, she's ill and friends come round. And then, so Rose just has to stay in the bedroom. You're at home with the kids Sunday.

I'm at home with the kids. Monday we do this. Rose is just ill. Tuesday, Rose is really ill. And then I've got to get the train to London because me and you. you were recording on Wednesday. Yeah, you're in London, won't you for three nights, won't you? So I got the train up Tuesday night.

There's nothing, it is a bleak, there's no way, two ways about it. The 7.30pm train is bleak as fuck. What, from Exeter London? For Exeter to London, just to go straight to a hotel. It is just bleak. It's hard to romanticise that route. There's no, I don't know what to do for dinner, because there's no proper food situation. Yeah.

You've got to try and find a way because it's going to be regular to make that a fun thing, to save a series. Or have you got an iPad to watch on or something? Yeah. Books. Would that be a good idea? I decided I was going to, because I had to stand up gig the next night, yeah? Which we discussed might have been a mistake. So you were getting up, like, Tuesday night, to record the interview podcast for this all day Wednesday.

And then you went straight from there to a gig Wednesday night. Which we discussed, you thought was a mistake I thought was clever. we'll see how that plays out. Okay. Then I'd get to my hotel just a bit bleak, but that's fine. Go to sleep, get up. What did you have for dinner and what did you do on the train out of interest? For dinner?

I had a, oh, it's so bleak. There was only a W.H. Smith's open at the station. Oh, God. So I had an overnight oats and a protein kaffir drink and a bag of snackerjacks. That is the order of a pregnant woman with cravings. It was the best option. And then I got on the train.

This was a mistake if you're feeling- Fafir, by the way. Kaffir's the future. It means I'll live until a 200 years old. Okay. Brilliant. Yeah. So then I got on the train and then I thought I should get the stand-up written

so that it's ready for tomorrow. Oh, God. So you're working on the 7.30 train. That was a mistake. To write a new stand-up for a show you don't need it. Yeah. So I get in. Quite buzzy by this point.

Yeah. What tends to happen in January is I hit the year too hard, Rob. I did have suspicions a couple of weeks ago when we chatted. Yeah. And then I... You get excited for the year, that's it. I do. And then you overbook.

Yeah. Also, bear in mind, right? This is for context. I'm looking at my phone a lot to. to track the chart position of the new podcast. Oh God. Bad neck? It's just, no, it's not giving me a bad neck, but it's giving me a bad amount of dopamine hit.

Well, the problem is, Josh, as you know, of any new podcast, you'll zoom up the charts. It'll make you feel all fuzzy and excited about yourself. I don't worry about that. Don't worry about that. Rob, don't worry about that. I'm getting Michael to send me the numbers. I'm going to send me the numbers.

I'm going to send me the number. No, no, no, no. I'm looking at the charts, but I'm also getting Michael to send me the clear data. Right, okay. Do you get the clear data for this one? No, don't care, because I know it's a success. Okay.

I did at the start, I'd ask Michael for the clear data. Really? Well, like, how many listeners have we got? That's the clear data. How many have we got? Michael, have I ever asked a clear data? I don't think so, no. No.

We're different people, Rob. Yeah, that's fine. I'm not saying it's wrong. I think it's actually weird that I never have once. That's what I'm not able to get you. I'm thinking, what the fuck's wrong with me? Yeah, at the beginning, I thought I might. But they're fine.

So you're looking a lot of your phone for dopamine. I go to sleep in the hotel, get up, come into town, interview Prince Nazim Habit, Lou. Brianie from Bakeoff as well. Oh yeah, I was doing the lunchtime. Lunchtime. I did a work phone call. And then Brianne from Bakeoff and escaped to the country in the afternoon.

She was incredible. That also had an energy to it that really, I'll be honest, I was. topping out in terms of manicness by the end of that episode. Yeah, it was quite, I think I was being quite disruptive in it, and I don't know why. So was I. So this is something that I need to discuss with you, Rob. Yeah. And then I went and we did some adverts.

And then I went and swapped some shoes. I was feeling quite manic at this point. And then I went and did the gig. I was nervous for the gig, but the gig went well. So dopamine back up again. Dopamine back up again, right? Yeah, it's drugs, isn't it, basically? Yeah, it's drugs.

And also, Rob, this is a bad thing. but the podcast is getting far more listeners than I anticipated, so I'm feeling really high because of that. Okay, well that's good. You're celebrating your success. That's good, yeah, but I've got a bad relationship with it. Then I go back to the hotel. Yeah. And suddenly I'm like, I feel fucking weird.

I feel fucking weird. What kind of weird? I feel so wired. Right. No coffee or anything. It wasn't, no, it wasn't caffeine. You just wound yourself up with dopamine. I am in a really weird mental space here.

So how does that manifest? What does that look like? I tried to read a book and I was like, I am not taking any of this in. Right, okay. And then I just sat on a bed. Yeah, I sat on a bed and I tried to watch Phil and Kirstie's Love It or List It. Right, yeah. Because Traders was on, but I'm behind so I couldn't watch it.

So, obviously, you're in a hotel, so you've only got live television. Yeah. Have you got an iPad? Not on me, and I don't enjoy watching on an iPad. I just find it too small. I'm just, yeah, I was just saying it because I think it would be, oh, I tell you what you can get. You can get a fire stick that you can plug into the back of,

an illegal one with all your apps on. That's a legal one, not an illegal one. That might be quite good then, and then you can plug that in, and then you can just get eye player on it and stuff like that. Because if you've got to be in hotels a lot, you're going to need to create, the hotel's got to be your sanctuary. Yeah. Not your cell.

No. And so I thought, I'll have a bath. So I looked, there's no bath. And so then I thought, some have a help. Yeah. Neon do these little room diffuses, travel ones. And if you find a nice smell that you have at home with it in your office. And then when you take that with you with the scent, the room will smell at home. Oh, that's nice. And then that might calm you down. I would say, Rob, all of those kind of things would very much like putting a sticking blaster on a broken leg. Do you know what? mean it was right okay so this at this stage in the game but going forward they may be things to introduce when you're calmer but at this point at this point florence night ago so i lie in bed i think i've got i've got chris evans very early the next day oh my god yeah so i'm like fuck i need to get up because i've got chris evans there i've got a full day i start panicking

obviously rob oh josh and i'm like so i think i what turned lights back on i'm like i'm like I am buzzing. I'm never going to sleep here. So I've gone to chat GPT. Yeah. I'm like, am I having a manic episode into chat GPT? I think before it responds, the answer is yes, if you're asking it. Well, it was interesting. We had a long chat. It was very reassuring. Yeah.

And also it does stuff which I needed, which is bad. And I know, it's like, don't worry, I'm here for you. And I'm thinking, I know you're not real. But I need someone to be here for them. that because I feel like I'm the only person on earth who isn't to sleep at this moment and it's dark outside and I feel manic. So I managed to chat GPT calm myself down. Yeah, it gave me, it talked to me about what I'd done, how much dopamine I was getting off my work that day, how how that was totally natural. I wasn't having a manic episode. I'd just, I'd taken too much dopamine on and I was buzzing. Yes. It was quite, I found it was quite an

It was an busy day of interviews and then to go to the gig was a mistake. I was mental, yeah. And then to do, especially when you've got the radio so early on. What you need to do really is rather than go for a gig, maybe meet a friend for dinner or coffee. Because rather than going into your room and going mad, meet a friend for dinner. And then by the time you get back to your room, sleepy time. So I wake up the next day. Yeah.

I've got Chris Evans, which is intense. Also, his studio has now been made to look like the tea. F.F. Friday Studio. Are you aware of this? Yeah, I saw that. I didn't know what was going on there. So that's happened.

It's a bit like saying to your wife and your marital home, do you mind if I turn our bedroom into my student halls of residence room? I've got a Sylvester Stallone Cobra poster. I can pop up there. So it was quite like, oh, right, I'm on a TV show now on the morning. You know, here we go. Yeah, it's not like radio anymore. It's like you are on a live TV show.

And then I do another podcast. What one? Miranda Sawyer's talk 90s to me because I thought that's a good promo for the podcast. Yeah, absolutely, yeah. And then I do... You're promoting in this new podcast, like you've been cancelled

and you've been given one opportunity back into showbiz where you're also our co-host of one of the biggest ones in the country already. The thing is, what I did, Rob, it wasn't so much that. It was, if I'm in London, I'm going to go for it. And that was a mistake.

What, complete exhaustion? That was the mistake I wrote. Then I did, Sean Walsh's Class Cowan podcast, right? Yep. And I'll be honest with you. By this point, I was, I've had to get the tapes of the interview because I was like, I think I was too honest there. So I think this is something we need to come to.

Because of this podcast where we're really honest and we just take the piss and go for each other quite a lot in a fun way, I've become quite a weird guest on other podcast. I'm like just saying things I would never have said before and just going for people. And then they're like, what are you doing? And I'm thinking, this is a podcast, mate. This is how it works. So has you been too harsh to shorten then? No, no, it was actually when I then the next day did Ellis James and John

Robin's podcast. I just came in and I was like taking the piss out of producer Dave. and then I was like having a go at Ellis for the gig we did together and like saying that saying some things he'd said to me that maybe I shouldn't have said on the podcast. But that wasn't live, but they can edit it out, they can edit it out.

Exactly. I was like, when did I become Johnny Rotten going on and absolutely smashing up interviews? Like, Josh, you may be slightly more honest than before, but I don't think you become Johnny Ron. No, I've become Johnny Rotten. No, I've become Mr. Blobby, if anything.

Yeah. Yeah, you are the podcast equivalent of Mr. Blobby coming in and causing chaos. But that's what people want. Yeah. You want you. So that was Wednesday. You came up Tuesday.

I know. I came up Tuesday night. Me and you did Wednesday. Then you gigged Wednesday night. Then you woke up and did about four or five podcasts that day. And then you went. Three. And then I had a meeting.

About what? Your mental health? Just, you know, there's meetings you've got in with production companies. Yeah, about ideas and stuff like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that industry shit, yeah. Like LinkedIn shit, yeah.

I was quite weird in that meeting. Weird in the meeting. Were you or just your head? Between each thing, keep the high going. I'm just looking at my phone too much. Right, okay. My phone is like this toxic thing where I'm just like constantly like, so this podcast, because we've gone video now as well, there's a lot more comments,

there's a lot more interaction. So that will be weighing on you slightly because you've got that going on. as well. And then get this. I'm gigging again. Why did you do another gig on Thursday? Because I tried to get out of it on Thursday morning and I felt a bit guilty because of the response when I tried to get out of it. So I was meant to be doing the six o'clock and the eight o'clock. I said, I'll just do the six o'clock. And then I went from, then I went for pizza with Ellis James. That's nice. He told me some stuff in confidence that I then said on his podcast the next day. On the Friday? Yeah.

So when did you go home? Well, the next morning, I did Chris Moyals, right? And then you know when you're in the global building and you're basically toured around the global building. Yeah, it's a hard on all that. Yeah. And then I'd got a voice memo of Chris Stark the night before saying Jordan North thinks that you don't like him.

Right, okay. And you don't. You like Greg James. No, I like Jordan North. I like Jordan North. You can like Jordan North and Greg James. Yeah. But you can only love.

Could you, for the podcast, for the show, when you come in, for the first link, be really nice to me and Sean, Chris said, and be horrible to Jordan and then we'll do it as a prank. Right, okay. That's stressful. He must have heard your reputation of ripping up podcast. So how horrible were you to Jordan, Ulf? It came in. Spat in his face, slapped him, and took the mic. I described Chris and Sean as the king and queen of breakfast radio.

Yeah. Jordan then said, just if you could have the mic near to your mouth for the show. I said to him, I know how to use a mic, mate. And I felt, do you feel good? I felt, who am I? Is this me? It's quite fun, isn't it, doing that? Even though it's a prank, but.

And then I just did the whole interview, turned towards Lota. And then halfway through the link, I said, I'm sorry, I can't do this. This is awful. Because before children even clocked it. No, he had clocked it. He was really upset. And I felt bad. Oh.

So did it work then or not? Yeah, it did work. It did work. But the relief when I, I was just like, guard it was awful. Anyway, it was good radio, but it was stressful. So I go from that. That's what you needed. I mean, I race across Australia, and John, because I've been racing for the last two days. Yeah. And they're like, you're two hours early. I unchecked. I just raced because I was in a racing mood. So didn't you just waited for two hours? Yeah, I went to a cafe and I had like

two strong teas, which was a mistake. So I was buzzing. And then I went on. Because you're not allowing yourself to come down, are you? You're just constantly going on my phone the whole time. texting, Instagramming, just like, you know, and you're just like, this is mental. I can feel I'm mental and I feel like exhausted and wire at the same time. Can I just say something? Because it doesn't feel like a positive, but the best thing about all of this is you're aware of it. I'm aware of it, yeah. Before you would have been in denial and this would have gone on for weeks and weeks.

And then you would have maybe drunk and then to calm down and then it gets worse. So after Ellis and John, did you go home? No. A couple of Zoom calls, our agents. I went to our agents to you there next to Ellis and John, basically, very near Ellis and John. So I used their office for a couple of Zoom calls. And then I got the car to The One Show. You did The One Show?

I thought you'd come up to do our podcast and then do last leg. Maybe he could have fucked off home again that day. No, because I had our podcasting and The One Show, so I filled in the gap. Two days? Yeah. Okay. So I did The One show. When I got to the one show, I thought, I got there early, right?

The thing is, though, Josh, if anyone's a fan of you at this point, they've got no time left to actually listen to the podcast your promo in, because they're still getting through the 93 hours of content you've given the world this week. No one, no one. Just let's count up the content you've given. You did two episodes of this on the Monday, three episodes of this on the Tuesday, on the Wednesday. Yeah, but they're not getting that. They're not getting that all on the day. Yeah, and then you'll give it them Chris Evans, Chris Moles, The One Show, Ellis and John, an hour and a half of local radio. Gordon North.

Of our Mist. Jordan North. Jordan North, Catholic. No one's listening to all of this. No one's listening. No one who's a Josh Whitcomb fan, Perish the Thought, is seeking out any of these things. Why say Perish the Fool? What's so bad about being your fan?

Oh, God. I don't know anymore. You're great to be a fan of. Anyway. Yeah. We'll do The One Show. I had a nap before the one show that was like being passed out. I've never slept like it.

And then I woke up and I had a twirl. Yeah, did you get a snack in them before as well? Very nice, yeah. Then I did the one show with Blue, Sarah Parrish and Blue. They're still all in it? Yeah, their 25th anniversary of all rise, Rob. They were all very good. It was lovely to see the Blue Boys.

Never met them before, apart from Duncan. And then I got the car to the station. I'll be honest. I had the train booked for 9pm. I got there at 10 to 8. I just bought another ticket, Rob. I just couldn't face it. I just thought I'm going to get the earlier train.

I can't sit at the station for an hour to get a later train. Yeah. Because I got the ticket. Keep moving. Keep going. Keep going. Keep going. Keep going.

Get home. And then I got home. Rose's shit all down with the floor, vomited on the stairs. Absolutely. Yeah. Rose has been like in such a bad state because she's been looking after the kids. And then there's the kittens, and then we let the kittens out on Saturday morning. Oh, yeah, have the kittens.

So you let them out into the whole house? No, half. Half. We've kind of just the downstairs. We've boxed them into the downstairs. So Beryl can still go upstairs. Beryl's got the upstairs. Beryl comes down, sees them.

She's known they're there because she can hear them in this room. And how's the smell of piss and shit? That's fine because there's been aired out of that room. When you were stressed up in London, did you think about taking some cat piss to be reassured? I wish I'd been there in my kids. You know, that scent I suggested for the room. Maybe you can just get a cat to piss in the corner of your hotel.

I was thinking these kittens are growing up every day, and I'm missing it, and I feel awful. So are they getting on okay with Beryl? They're fine. Beryl then has gone basically upstairs hiding for three days. Oh dear. Beryl's also on antibiotics because she's got a... Please say antidepressants. She needs to be.

She's also on antidepressants. She's in a way she is because we've got to get these plug things now that let... hormones out that make cats happy. Do they do human ones for you? Well, I, when I got home, I got, I haven't only looked at my phone over the weekend. I've detoxed on my phone. I've felt much better. Kittens, well done.

Yeah. The phone is fucking toxic. No, it's awful. We are addicted to it. It's awful. Anyway. Do we have a quick look at the charts? So, see where you are. Don't, Mike. I woke up this morning to.

some stats from Michael. He's got it bad as well. Oh, is Michael? Have you got it bad or has he demanded it, Michael? Have you got it? No. Michael sent some unrequested stats this morning. It's number one on popular shows. I mean, what I will say is I'm just preempting it now. Preempting the breakdown. This episode is brought to by Fairy Non-Bio.

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Gentle on skin with long-lasting freshness even after a full day of wear. With delicate cherry blossom notes and a comforting cotton touch, it's like a cuddle in a bottle. What am I doing with my life? I just keep my phone away from me. I think what you're doing is, do you want me to try? Try and answer that. Well, this is the other thing, Rob. And I'll do it the kind way, non-Bantaway.

Yeah, the kind way is often worse. No. The banter way is sort of just a bit of a... I think you really get excited about things and love doing things. I do. I love doing them. All of those things you did, apart from maybe a couple, you really love doing. And that is a fun day for you if it's spread out.

But I think what you're doing is you have so much dad guilt about being a way what you try and do is try and make so much most of you being away so that when you come back you know well I had to do that I got it all done in one day I've almost also got the tour ready for next year blah blah blah blah but actually what am I doing it's too much you've just got to go up to London and you enjoy being in London and go to the gym have a bit of food and please believe it or not madame too swords but like I just think you're too much of a grafter and you're trying to put in too much and just let you've got I forgot I forgot that I got a hotel with

The gym, Rob. And I ran a 5K the morning before we did all those interviews as well, which really got me jangling as well. You did a 5K that morning? Yeah, because I woke up so early. Oh, yeah. But I think, yeah, I think, like if you're doing the one show, that's probably enough, isn't it? Well, I'm done now. Also, anyone that likes you or you listens to this, just tell them on here you're doing it.

Yeah, come on. I wish to say that last week. Do you know what it is? Do you know what it is? Yeah. It's not. And I, well, maybe it's a bit, but. not as much as it was, maybe five, ten years ago, even three, five years ago, right?

Yeah. It's not about ego as much as it was. It used to always, obviously, in our job, a lot of it is about you want to be success, and that's your ego, and that's, but it's also about if I really enjoy making that podcast, like I really enjoy making this podcast, and what I love is you get yourself in a position where you can just do something that you really enjoy and you're in control. of it. And so I was like, I'd really like this to be a success for that reason. Do you know what I mean? Not in the way where I'm like, I want my book to come out and be number one so that I can say I've

got a number one. But it's not what, do you know what I mean? And so then I got caught up in that and then I put all this promo in. And then, actually, this is the worst thing. On Sunday, I felt a bit down. And I was like, I can't imagine why. Yeah. Why do you want all this? but can I say what my take of it is I don't think I can stop you well it's not about the I don't think it's about when you say it's not about the ego no it is some point about the ego but it's not in the same way as it used to be if that makes it no but absolutely not but what's happened is

this new project project has dragged you back into that the ego vortex because like you said I just want it to be a success but if you get to make it and you enjoy making it and it's out in the world, isn't that a success already? Well, yes, but I won't get to keep making it if it's not got any listeners. Yeah, but that's relative. If other things are owning slightly more

and that unsightly less, but you still love doing it, that'll be enough to keep it going. What I want to do, though, Rob, is just sit in this room and never leave Exeter. Yes, well, then stop doing promo. Yeah, well, I have. Okay, well, I'm sorry, I'll do it all. Actually, I'm doing my mesh on February 6th,

it just turns out. February the 5th. February the 5th, thanks for telling me. It'll be there. Day late. Fuck. So anyway, on Sunday, get home. Beryl just basically,

she won't eat and she won't come out from under the bed. And then my daughter makes a box with her bed in it. And she sits in that in this box, which has got, I mean, it's very nice. My daughters have decorated it with like VIC, very important cat and made a little red carpet for her and stuff. Or could be perceived as victim.

him. She's been edged out by the two cute new ones. Oh, it's awful, right? So Beryl stops eating. Then she's got her food out with her pill in. And then we look around and one of the kittens has eaten the antibiotic. Oh, no. So then, was that killer kitten? Well, straight on my child, GPT. And, um, chat, here he comes. Oh, manic boy's back again. What's he got for me now? Rose texts her friend. Sometimes it does go back to the history of what you asked it and goes, you may be more worried about this kitty at this pill because you did have a manic episode in that hotel in London this week.

Exactly, yeah, yeah. Is there another adult nearby that I can talk to? Most phones are friends with a vet. They say it'll be fine. The cat's fine. Right. And then a barrel won't come out. And then last, or the whole of yesterday she won't move.

She's just stationary there and you're like, oh my God. And then it's like, we're told to get this thing. She basically won't eat. She's on hunger strike. Oh, no. Because of the stress. Because of the stress of the whole thing. And then we're like, maybe it's her UTI because maybe she's ill and it's impossible for us to know if she's ill or if she's, because that's how she behaves when she's ill.

But it's also how she behaves because the cat is. Oh, God. Then I wake up at 3.30 a.m. as covered in the last episode. Go downstairs to get my headphones so that I can listen to podcasts to go back to sleep. Beryl's on the landing. Oh. I give her some strokes. she's purring. She's back. Oh, that's good. She's back. And then she's eaten her dreamies this morning. So hopefully beryl's on the mend. But fuck me. She might as be a bit unwell. It's really, really stressful introducing a cat to the older cat. You presume the older cat will dominate the young cats. Yeah. Actually. She's on her last leg. She can't dominate nothing. She can't even piss properly. She's not on her last leg. She's got another decade in her. She's going to be a fucking shit decade, isn't it? She's all over to gaff.

She's having a lovely time. She just. You know what she needs. If she was a human, she needed a new man. Remarry. You've got another 50 years left, Beryl. Go for it. Well, how old was the other one that passed away? Early. Seven. Fucking hell, that's well early. I know. Sad, isn't it? So how old's Beryl? 9? 10. 10. So Beryl could go for another 10 years.

Yeah. And she's already pissing all over. She always got bad kidneys. Was that the other one? Yes, she's got bad kidneys, Beryl. But we've got the, that's why she has to get done. Yeah. Oh gosh. That's why she has to get flushed. Anyway, today I'm doing this. And then I'm going up to talk to you all day tomorrow.

And then what about the rest of the week? You're coming home right after. Coming home. Perfect. That's better. And it's all good. The relationship to work is a constant battle. Yeah.

Especially with new projects. Yeah. Because it's really difficult because you do something and you do want people to listen to it. And that is totally natural and normal. Yeah, because it has to function as a government. in business concern because if you spend three days a week on something that earns no money if it earns some then you can balance

it out but you can't keep going and going to work to earn no money yeah so there we go but all at all it's been a stressful old week but you know we went and got my daughter's riding hat fitted on Sunday when do you get the horse we're not getting a horse Rob you don't ever get the horse you do always rent the horse

then is how it works we're just going for horse lessons at the moment I'm not I'm not trying to to wind you up. I don't know how it works. So you go to a stables for lessons and they have a horse that you use. Yeah, yeah. They give you a horse to have lessons on. And does she use the same horse every time? No, like different horses. But she's got her own actual helmet now. She's got her own helmet. Yeah, so there we go. And you live in Exeter. Yeah, I do. And she's going for horse lessons. Oh, do you know what we did on Saturday night, Rock? See, when I'm here,

can I just, can I just say so? You will buy a horse. Sorry, what? You're going to buy a horse. Can we also place a bet? I had a bet I thought about today. Yeah. When I was thinking about... Didn't we have a bet about you but moving? Yeah. So I owe you on that bet.

I owe you on that bet. The horse bet I'm unwilling to take on because I think you're probably right. No, we're making progress. But I've got a bet with you. I think after the success of Bromley, and after a bit of a break, three or four months. I think you will announce a tour within 12 months of your tour finishing. So my tour officially finishes in Glasgow in April this year, so within 12 months.

Do you know what? I think you might be right because if I can do it this way and do it on a Friday. Here we go. But I won't be, I'll be able to do that because I'll only be missing the kids Friday nights rather than a week. So would you just do Fridays? The plan is potentially for the next tour. Whilst the kids are still young, I'd go back to normal touring when they're older. Yeah.

It's to go to a city for Friday and then put one of the shows on sale. I either start at the 1 o'clock one or start at the 8 o'clock one and work backwards. So put on 8 o'clock, if that sells out, 4.30, if that sells out, 1 o'clock. Would you tour one day a week? Or would you also do the weekdays? No, one day a week. One day a week. The maddest tour in history.

And I love it. That's still three gigs a week, isn't it? Been one day. Yeah. I am better, the shows are better for it because I'm in the mode, I'm in doing it. I look forward to having a discussion with you, right, in a year when you're going, the thing is, once you're up in Newcast on the Friday, it makes sense to on the way back do Leeds three times on the Saturday.

No, it doesn't. And then it does make sense to do Birmingham on the Sunday. So, do you know what actually it makes sense? It actually makes sense. I couldn't even fucking watch ballet shoes, never mind do ballet shoes three times. but that'll be the plan but also as well some people are really scripted

when they say the exact words each time it sends them mad I'm not it's very loose and I'll put in new bits change bits talk to the crowd every show is slightly different

if you come to those three shows you'll have seen quite a lot of different material so do all three um I saw manager poor fucking bastard he's only on one fee

you know physically he did I don't think he did it emotionally No, he weren't. I didn't pay him for one day. I paid him for free shows. Oh, good, good. That's, yeah. The tour manager would be, that would be an absolute nightmare for a tour manager. What have increased the length of his day dramatically? What time do you arrive at the venue? I got there about 20 past 11. Yeah, the good news is, Rob, I reckon I'll be announcing a tour within a year of mine finishing because the amount of the gigs I'm doing at the moment, I'll be ready.

Oh, yeah, those extra gigs that are really sorting you out there. Yeah, do you know what? And it's calming me down. That's the good thing about it. Because otherwise I'd be worried about the next tour, but now I'm actually calmer. Yeah, because, yeah. Or the other option would be sleeping, resting,

socialising, eat in well, maybe exercising. But no. I had a pizza express with Ellis James. I had a pizza express with Ellis James. Oh, you can't you? I love a pizza express. It's so good at it. On Saturday night, we went to a light show at the cathedral

because there's nothing else to do down there. Unbelievable. you are you're a piece of work we went to get my son's hair cut on Saturday and all I could think was this is so easy this is incredible yeah it used to be such an effort

when I lived in Zone 2 I'm only joking I'm sure that was lovely it was very nice cathedral very on brand for you right here we go Josh hi Rob and Josh love the pot it keeps me smiling and entertained as a full-time mum to five-year-old twins

and an 18 monthfold oh my God Fuck. Last year, I decided, Sorry. Last year, to be fair, that's pretty easier in your last week. Yeah. Last year, I decided I was going to do something for myself and started my own small business called Cast a Moment. So if you could give me a small business shout out,

it would be so much appreciated. I specialize in 3D casting hands and feet for kids, dogs, pores, pregnant bellies, couples and families which are then framed or mounted. I offer a mobile service and cover Central Scotland Castamomoment.co.com. Also on Facebook and Instagram, that's castamomoment.coma.com.

You should do that. Give you a chance to sit down and stay still for a bit. Could I please request a small business shout out for my amazing husband, Dave and his brother Duncan? Go on, Dave and Duncan. Dave and Duncan is, of course, the name of David Bowie and his son. What a boring fact. Do you know that they are turning the house David Bowie

grew up in in Bromley into a English heritage museum visitor attraction when they're making it all 60s. Oh, amazing. When he lived there. And where was it? Was it a nice house or is it like? It's like a little two, three bed terraced. That's on called up.

Playstow Lane or something. It's like a very, very nondescript home. A great man. Do you get annoyed at Brixton trying to claim him a bit too much? Yeah, it's really annoying. Yeah. Because you're formative years are where you're from. Yeah, exactly.

when you go to 20, you know. There are small family business creating beautiful, bespoke garden rooms. Oh, this is, sorry, inside out garden rooms down here in Ivy Bridge, Devon. Ivy Bridge. Oh, lovely. Just outside Plymouth. There are small family business creating beautiful bespoke garden rooms perfect for working from home. Man Caves.

Tiki bars, hobby spaces, you name it. Tiki. Inside out. Tiki. What's that? Like sort of Hawaiiany sort of like Tiki bar. No, thanks. Inside out.

garden rooms. Is that racism towards Hawaiians? No, it's just not. I don't want that in my house. Do you like pineapple on your pizza? I think pineapple on the pizza isn't the big debate that people think it is.

I think it's fine. What's your answer? I don't mind it. It's fine. Okay. But you hate Hawaiians. You need their food. I don't hate Hawaiians.

Barack Obama was born in Hawaii. I like him. Okay. They founded the business from scratch and I'm so proud of how much they've grown. I, by talking about the last week become manic again in the last hour. I'm so proud of how they've grown it from

real craftsmanship, quality of build and proper integrity in every design. They pour their hearts into every project and it mean the world to give them a little boost. Thanks so much and keep the chaos coming. We have. Absolutely lovely. Love the podcast of loyal listeners since day one. Kirstie, inside out, gardenrooms.com.com. Good luck, Dave and Dunker. Oh, lovely. They are nice. They are nice. Spill me drink. Right, Josh. We'll drink. Please try and have some time to yourself. I'm feeling much better.

The weekend has done a lot of good for me. And I detox and I'm going to block my phone the moment we finish this podcast. Done. See you next week. Love you. Love you too, Josh. Yeah, we should end like that. I don't know.

That's a bit weird. Peace and love. Peace and love. Peace and that. No? Hello, parenting hellness. recognize that voice? Yes, it's Josh Widdickham here. I have got a new podcast, Josh Whiticom's Museum of Pop Culture, and I'm going to say it. I'm about 85% sure you're going to love it.

Here are the reasons why. Number one, I'm confident if you're listening now, you don't hate me, and possibly think I'm funny. Number two, I'm confident if you're listening now, you like podcasts. Number three, I'm confident if you're listening to me and Rob, you prefer pop culture to people talking about things, let's be honest, boring things like history, economics or politics. I know I do, and that is why I made this podcast. I wanted a show that tells the stories I love from popular culture in the way other podcasts do for drier topics. See above. Basically, I wanted a podcast that realized Millie Vanilli were more interesting than Elizabeth I first. Join me as I give the definitive, or at least the funniest, takes on Mr. Blobby. When Ghost Watch convinced BBC viewers,

ghosts were real. When a band burned a million pounds for a laugh. The Spice Girls, a truly catastrophic Spider-Man musical with music from you too, and David Hasselhoff, Baywatch, and his part in the fall of the Berlin Wall. All of them are real, by the way. Either you know what these things are and you're about to learn far more about them than you ever realised you wanted to, or you don't, and you're about to be introduced to some of the maddest things in modern or ancient history. Stiff next will learn, loose next will laugh. New episodes available every Wednesday and Saturday. Perfect to fill those gaps between your weekly doses of parenting hell.

So go on, you might as well listen, subscribe and follow wherever you get your podcast now. Museum of Pop Culture with me, Josh Whitacom, available everywhere from the 1st of January.