Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S12 EP6: Harry Hill (The Return)

Episode Date: January 23, 2026

Joining us this episode to discuss the highs and lows of parenting (and life) is the return of the legendary comedian - Harry Hill. You can find Harry's new podcast 'The Harry Hill' show on all the usual platforms. New episodes every Monday. Watch on Spotify and Youtube. Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Please subscribe and leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xx If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: [e-mail] Follow us on instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@parentinghell⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to Parents in Hell with. Una, say Rob Beckett. No, Rob Vida. Say Josh Whittacom. Say Gobble-Gobble. Gobble. Well done. Cute, but didn't say any words.

No, 21 months, almost two. Una, having a go at your name, she's our youngest of three girls, but the first time we've actually managed to send an attempt in. We've been listening from the very start and haven't missed an episode. All the best. Alex and Zane. That's got to be

bollocks. They've never missed one episode. Yeah, because it's easy. Because it's, you get these on a podcast. You're telling me she listens to all of Connor Ben. From zero to end. How are you, Josh?

I'm good, actually. Excited about today's episode. We've just recorded it. Love Harry Hill. Love Harry Hill. Good one, wouldn't it? Yeah, by the way, that's from Alex and Zane in Wittam. I've heard Rob mispronounce this in the past. along with our neighbouring town, Maldon. Can I leave in secret?

No one gives a shit about the name of your town. It's in Essex. Yeah. No one cares. Did you go down the camera for that? Yeah. For their audio listeners, you didn't see how aggressive I went then. Yeah, that was quite aggressive.

I quite like being sort of, um, faux, like, angry. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I started off in comedy as being sort of like, oh, cheeky chippy, I'm so happy. I'm here. Oh, I don't even know what that is, which is sort of true. Oh, thank you for the opportunity, Governor. Yeah. Oh, thank you. Frank, you let me on it, and now, tell what my angle is,

I'm going fucking nowhere. Yeah, I know you are. Yeah. I think that's a bit harsh. You might have plateaued a bit, but I think... I'd say, you know, slightly, you know, but like a self-fulfilling prophecy. Could I ask you a question? When did you drop finishing your sets with, be lucky?

I still say be lucky when I finish your sets, yeah. Yeah, I don't know. You implying that was a sort of a misstep, and I was probably cringing about that. No, not a misstep, but I'm saying it fitted in with the sets with your sets with old persona but not the new Ray Winston persona. No. No, but in my defence, when I first started doing TV, I was like 24 and I didn't know anything. I'm 40 now.

I am more aware. No, but I'm more aware of what's going on. I've got more self-worth now. I'm more confident. I know who I am and what I want. Maybe. Maybe. He's just done that down the camera again.

I'm like an aggressive Frankie Howard. Yeah. I'd take. This was. one of the, not in a wanky way, because Harry isn't all that at all, the most name-dropping, star-studded, anecdotal episode I've ever done. It is. Isn't it?

Because very few people have worked with the toast of Hollywood. Yeah. And also all the other, you know, the people you met. And Chris Tarrant. But it was brilliant. Yeah, brilliant. Great episode. Absolutely love Harry.

I loved his story about his kids when he said a moment that he really cherishes and makes him laugh and he remembers it. Yeah. And I loved, he got genuinely emotional at one. point, but not in a Stephen Bartlett way. No, but I think if we were that, not Stephen Bartlett, but that type of sort of serial killer podcaster, we would have

really jumped all over him and got the tears out on him. Yeah, yeah. Someone would have him punching in on the edit. Because we're emotionally awkward men, we actually just went, cool, should we move on and make some jokes about Adele? Yeah, I just don't want to make a man cry just because he's thinking, have his thoughts about his daughter. Let him bowl on, put his big collar on, plug his show, get home.

The Harry Hill show is available now on podcast. And here he is. When we got our cat cremated, our cat died and they gave us the form. The food was costing us too much. And there was two levels of fee. One was ashes. And the other was the ashes of your specific cat. So some people who can't afford it are just paying all the cats are going in.

And then you just get a bit of that. Just get some generic cat ashes. I've got a story about our dog. We had a dog, it's a very sweet dog, which was my wife's dog originally, and she had diabetes, and so you had to give these, you know, insulin, and it was quite a responsibility.

And we went on holiday, and we were nervous by going holiday, so we left it with the breeder, this lady that knew the dog really well. And we went away, we came back, we went to go and pick the dog up, and she said, I'm afraid the,

dog died. Didn't want to phone you because they didn't want to support your holiday but your dog died and she handed us a receipt to go and pick up the ashes from the from the wets. And charges for the kenneling. Not the whole duration.

Up to death. No. And was it a diabetes death? Was it her for not being on top of the? We haven't had the results of the inquest yet. I don't even think it. I do think is the vet equivalent of Quincy turning out right there or you know CSI whatever it is

you know so Harry how many kids you got and have you got a dog? Well one at a time guys sorry we know what have you learned over the last four years last time I was here well it's the first time I've done it in person we did it on Zoom before you was in your yeah I was listening to it on the way in because I was trying to remember what I talked about oh yeah so you've got three children there's something you said

that always sticks with me before you say anything I've got a message for you from my wife. She said to me, what are you doing? I said, oh, I'm, she said, why are you in the outfit? Oh, no. And she said, I thought that was over. I said, no, there's still some.

Are you tempted to drop the outfit, though? Or is it will forever be the outfit? Because it's just easier, isn't it? It's easier to put it on. Is it? Anyway, I said, I'm doing that parenting hell thing. She said, yeah, I got a message for those two. She said, parenting hell, she said, any wife of a comedian will know

who does the parenting? It's not the comedians. Oh my word. Well, I tell you what she... That comes from grim first-hand experience, isn't it? I tell what she'd like to buy, Lou Beckett's book called The Lessons from a Default Parent and she's written a book very much about that.

Oh, really? About being the one that does all the parenting. And do you feel that's fair on you, Harry? The comedy widow. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. Do you feel like you've done more parenting now that you're older and the kids are older?

Well, I've stopped parenting now. Oh, have you? Yeah. How old are your kids? had a cutoff. I said, you know, we stopped parenting at 20. I think it's 21, isn't it? You come of age and you're on your own.

I'm kidding. I'm kidding, but you're not like... I don't think you are, really. You're not... I think you have, actually, you've drawn an imaginary line and if they come home and go, Dad, this is God, and you're like, yeah, well, good for you. Yeah, my wife, because our kids live near us.

Yeah. We see a lot of them. Yeah. And she said, uh, oh, she's coming around again tonight. So how old are, though? 28, 27 and 21. This is what I remember vividly of the first one. I don't know why it stuck with me,

was you saying that you weren't sure about having a third child. That's right, yeah. But then it was the best decision you ever made. Oh, why are you thinking about? No, but there's something that stuck with me about that. I tell you what it was. It's very rare that you see into the soul of Harry Hill, the person. Do you know what I mean?

It felt like a genuine moment of deep emotion from you. Yeah, yeah. Well, I mean, it was a blur that. Because we had two, you know, we had the Irish twins thing, the year between them. And it was just like absolute, you know, you had that double pram. Yeah, we had the double pram. Trying to get that into, you know, an automatic door. Watching your wife trying to move that into a door.

You approach the door, you know, with the double pram. You've got to sort of maneuver it in. the door shuts or you've got to get it airports for a nightmare. So was it sorry driver and passenger or front and back? What? The double pram, is it front and back? Side by side. Side by side. Yeah, side by side. Yeah, the double decker came in I think

after we... Yeah, but also it's unfair for the undercarriage child. Yeah. Just looking at the ass of the back, it's not very nice. Can't see anything. The back of a pantomime horse situation. Briefly there was the buggy board. Remember the buggy board? We had a buggy board. That was fun. But they don't really want to go on that off the first couple of

runs they want to go in the pram yeah yeah because it's it's it stops being a laugh very quick yeah and it's obviously it's much easier if they're in a pram yeah but you do see i think it's always funny you see those kids you sort of wandering around blue water or something and uh there's like a great big kit in the frown yeah like a seven-year-old or something with a dummy and did you ever go disney you see yeah yeah yeah yeah so much walking you do get like 11-year-olds in the pram still because they're so tired yeah so i went to your show at shepherd's bush oh yeah oh yeah i briefly dropped into the after drinks, but you didn't show. I was there.

I know, but I... You ran off, you mean. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, so I remember coming around. You do wait long enough for him? I gave it 20 minutes, and I was like, he's obviously giving some kind of producer a roasting backstage from Miss Q. Yeah, you get this thing where, you know, people come,

friends come to see the show, and then the speed with which they find their way backstage is a bit of a wind up to me. You come off, you're drenched in sweat. You just want a breather. Knock, knock on the door. Yeah. Oh, hello. Yeah. The reason I bring this up is your daughter was there.

Yeah. And I thought, what's it like? They were all there, all three of them. All three of them. One was dressed as stufer. One was dressed as Gary. One was dressed as the ice cream. Oh, wow.

So they all took part in the show. Yeah, at the end, they come on as the... Oh, so? And what's that like? Is that a very... It's been brilliant. Yeah. So have they done the whole tour?

No, they... No. Not at such a loose end as that. Because the wife's gone on stage as well. My wife wouldn't know. She doesn't like come and see the show. Let them have been in it. She goes, where are you going?

So I've got Shepa's Bush tonight. Why aren't you in the alpha? I changed into it when I get there. No, because, you know, like I said before, I always sort of discouraged them coming along with kids. Yeah. And this time, because they're older, they came along.

great because they're because you can't see their face so as you know Winnie's in the she's 27 she's in the stufer costume yeah she can see me but I can't see her ways but somehow just by the way she's dancing I know it's her

and I and I would always kind of forget because they would come maybe you know maybe the youngest did more maybe about two weeks of it on and off and I paid I think I did say I was going to pay them if I didn't and then Freddie

would come on as Gary so she's got the thing and then Gary's head sticking out of the top so you can't see it and she would come and she said to me I'll come on

and I'll maybe do a little dance with you and I thought yeah okay so she comes on and of course they're her hands yeah but they look like Gary's hands and she just takes my hands

and you just I just know oh it's Fred's hand it's like a really actually really affecting and sweet and it's the first time I thought

well maybe you know it'd be great if one of them did go into it But, um, none of them gone into performing. No. They're all funny, but I mean, I think everyone's kids are funny, aren't they? I don't think we talked about this last time? Because I don't think I realized it.

But you've got hell of a kind of kid following through junior bakeoff. Yes. Yeah. Well, I had kids following me from you've been framed. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And TV burp, you know, so it's funny on this last tour, because I didn't tour regularly for a while. Yeah.

And I get these kids. guys coming on a 25 year hours and they're going, Harry, you're my, you of my childhood. Can I hug you? Oh, really? Yeah. Very like 25, late 20s, maybe. Yeah.

And then you get these, you know, little and sort of 10 year olds or whatever. Oh, wow. Yeah, yeah. Because you did a podcast sort of aimed at younger kids. Now you've got a new podcast coming out. There's still family friendly. I love the way he's, yeah. He's good, isn't it?

He's very good. He did a great one the other day. What was that one? That was really good. Oh, Prince Nazim Hamid. It's so easy for me. I don't like doing it all the time. What I mean?

Well, let me jump on that. Yeah, I've got a new podcast. Are you going to go down the barrel for this? Yeah, straight down the baza. Is that my barrel? I've got a new podcast out. It's called the Harry Hill Show. And we're video, you know, like everyone's videoing.

Yeah, yeah. And I basically... It's a TV show now, baby. You've got your all control over. It's basically cheap TV. But it's sort of repeating history. So you know once upon it was radio. Yeah, and then someone said oh we could film it and that was TV and now it's the other than it was podcast oh hey we could film it It's like come on guys wake up

And um We're already doing this So I mean we'll just fall in we all just fall in and do it Oh you got a video? Yeah, all right, we video it And because you were doing it from home before This is a real drag for you, right? I live in Devon now as well, but I live in Devon now as well, but I Actually, the interviews are a lot more fun. We're loving the face-to-face interviews.

Well, you say that. Well, he's come from exit. You've only come from London. Yeah, yeah. 20 minutes. You was already here. Do you wear that suit from here then? Because you'll get way more attention wearing that to them from.

I couldn't wear on the tube. No, that's mad. Well, I could do, I suppose. No, it'd be a bit. Yeah. In fact, I recently did this thing. I've talked about it before. Perhaps not to you, about this idea.

for a TV show I had. Okay. Let me just finish this about the Vodcast. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that what you're calling it a Vodcast? I'm calling it a Vodscarf. No, okay. Because the podcast was a podscarf.

Because basically, although you get some information to your brain, you also get a sort of warm feeling around your neck. Lovely. And so there's elements of the previous podscarf. So I've got Gary, but he plays less of a role. Yep. You know, right, Daddy, you didn't tell me that? Yes, Gary.

And I thought I told you to stay in the car. And I've lent into the videoing of it a bit, perhaps a bit too, I think maybe I've lent into it too heavy. I got sent a picture of your set by Ed Gamble. Yeah, Ed did it. Yeah, Ed did it. It looks great. It does. Yeah, it looks like a TV show from the 70s that has been sealed up for like.

50 years and someone has unsealed it and yeah and that's always kind of been your yeah yeah yeah I was really pleased when I saw it and it's just it's just a few bits of you know MDF and how have you got on it first one is Stuart Lee my old friend Stuart Lee oh your old friend Stuart Lee yeah and we play we have named the seed which is the quiz yep which I made the contraption for from a car aerial you know one of this car or else that goes connected to a battery underneath a wine box

So you create So do you create these things And then find a use for them Or is it work back? How's it work? I think I'm I'll make a platform That rises up

What can I use that for? Yeah Or do you go I need a platform that rises up How did it? No I thought I needed something To bring into life Yeah

But I didn't know if you had all these things You think right I need a joke for this now Or how to use it Tim Vine does that. I went around to Tim Vine's house. There's this one. I pick up this thing.

It's a hat with all these great big wasps that he's had made attached to the hat. I said, oh, right. I said, what was the gag for that? He said, oh, I never came up with a gag for that. But he did. He said, the only time I ever wore it, he said, was that I did have a wasp's nest in the garden. And the guy from Rentico came around to get rid of it.

And I answered the door wearing it. I'm quite good at saying. I went on a holiday. Well, I'm trying to get you on the pod scuff. I will come on it. I can do it. Now you know there's a seed game. Well, no, because I basically, I went on a holiday and there was a buffet at breakfast and buy the granola all the seeds.

Right. Pumpkin. Sunflower. Watermelon. Yeah. Well, these aren't edible seeds. These are perhaps you wouldn't be quite so cocky if you were... If I was to put a purple radish seed in front of you.

No one has successfully named the seed. So the format roughly is I do a bit at the top. Yeah. You get the guest on. Then we get the theme of the week. We have an expert on. Oh, okay. So, for instance, we had John Cooper Clark on.

Oh, wow. As the guest. It's a proper show, isn't it? Yeah. It's not just too fucking idiots chatting. Yeah. I've bitten off way more than I can chew. John Cooper Clark and then we get the expert on.

And the theme of the week is flies, right? So we get this expert on who is like one of the, world experts on flies and she's got a jar of flies and she's taking to a meeting. John Cooper Clark basically remained pretty quiet all the way through this fly stuff and it's a good sort of 10, 15 minutes

and I said, oh John I said you know what do you know about flies? And he said I never really became aware of flies until I saw that film I said what film he said The Fly

So, yeah, yeah, he's great. He's great. Well, he hasn't got kids, you can get him. No. At Medcan, we know that life's greatest moments are built on a foundation of good health, from the big milestones to the quiet winds. That's why our annual health assessment offers a physician-led, full-body checkup that provides a clear picture of your health today,

and may uncover early signs of conditions like heart disease, cancer. A healthier you means more moments to cherish. Take control of your well-being and book an assessment today. Medcan. Live well for life. Visit medcan.com slash moments to get started. But you've always been interested in like popular culture and pop music. So when I did Alien Fun capsule, we sang Shout Out to My Ex, which instantly we had the writer of on earlier. Oh, really? Have you got all that through your kids? Like, has all your references since I've watched you

have always been kind of quite contemporary. Well, I mean, the references, my references are, you know, from what was going on at the time, you know, and I used to like the pop music. I used to like some kind of insight of music. I don't. I just like, I used to like what was in the charts. You're not, it's sort of unpopular.

You're not really supposed to say that, are you? But, yeah. But I used to like what was ever in the, you know, in the charts. I like, you know, the oldest swinger in town or I like, you know, Lulu or take that, or anything I could sing along to. Yeah.

And, but then you lose that as you get older. You think you'll always be interested in what's out, but you're not, actually. You can't. You saw at one point you just give up. Well, I feel like your kids drag you back into it. And then the kids. I'll never have listened to them.

No, no. You know, if I didn't have kids. Yeah. It was the one, the vampire song. I love that one. Olivia Rodrigo. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

You chew me up like a goddamn vamp. pie. Yeah, I don't think I've heard that one. A very musical version. I'm so messy. That one, you know. Oh, Loli Young? Yeah, lowly young.

That's a good song. Have you got these three of kids? Yeah. Actually, with Freddy, she used to, we'd go in the car. I'd be driving her somewhere. And she'd say, let's learn a rap. So she'd put a rap tune on that.

So I came to be. Oh, I've seen you do this on Instagram. I'd learn, you know, 16 shots by Stefflon Don and all that stuff. Oh, you learn all of it? Pretty much. Can you do it? I'm not going to do it now. Well, anyway. It feels very much like you can't say I know.

Come on, Harry. Give us a fucking clip. He's 2026 now this world. No guy can't tell me about my mother. 16 shot, we go longer than a ladder. Him nothing talk about the real Don Dadda. Put body in a pot. Him a burn like rubber. No guy can dismeal my mother.

Round here ain't safe. Everybody need armor. 16 shots we go longer than a ladder. Rata. Ratta. Ratta. Rata. Ra.

Kaka kaka kaka. Oh, yes. Wow. And with your daughters, what's it like when they're in their 20s now? Are you like of that stage where they're your mates or you still kind of feel like you're kind of an authority figure? Well, they're your mates.

They're your mates. You know, they're good company. Yeah. But then sometimes you want to just, you want to then revert back. Oh, so it's like, mate. Don't you feet off the sofa? Sorry, yeah.

You know, all that. You know, it's that. He does do that a lot. Which is sort of awkward, because for them, I imagine, you know, they, you know, you're sort of leading them along. Yeah. We're doing this and then suddenly you're saying, you know. Obviously, we do this podcast, we chat about being parents and stuff like that, but I don't put my kids up on social media. Oh, never, no, no.

Some people are just, it's everywhere. Exploitation. And it's not fair on the kids because they don't have a decision or a choice in a matter at seven or eight. And they would say, and they say yes, because it's very superficially very attractive. Yes. Do worry, you know, further down the line. Yeah, before you know, they're dancing around dressed as a giant blue cat on your stage. But some of them put on, like, Instagram, it'll be like, oh, thanks at a, like, a brand and, like, great bubble bath.

And their kids are, like, in a bubble bath, like, thumbs up and hashtag ad. I'm like, oh, who's doing the advert here? The kid or the parent, because then that money should be going to the child. They're in the advert, not the parent. My ad ad ad adieu is always that I wasn't really a person, you know, I'm like a persona rather than that. Yes. Yeah. The more that people knew about me was, you know, sort of spoiled the...

Well, that is completely changed in entertainment, that kind of thing of where do your audience now expect more of you as an individual than just turning up and doing the act? Yeah. And see, the old days are the old stars. You didn't know anything about them. Yeah. Didn't know anything about them. No, exactly.

And look how that ended. You didn't know if they lived in this country even. You didn't know if David Bowie lived in... Yeah. idea you couldn't find anyone's David Bowie used to take a Greek newspaper on the subway so that if someone

recognised him they'd think it wasn't him because he wouldn't be I don't think that's enough I'd go why is David Bowie holding a Greek newspaper I mean I'll try it but you'd even get a Greek newspaper Is that Harry Hill with a Greek newspaper tucked under his massive collar?

Wait a minute it's last year's Greek newspaper I don't know if he'd subscribe The suicide. The suicide crisis. Is he holding a jar of flies? Did you have situations then when your kids were like teenagers or even younger

where you must have been being invited to things and exciting things for them? I worked out not to, I didn't enjoy those things. Yeah. On the whole. So then people sort of stopped inviting me to a large extent.

Which then I started to resent slightly. No, you still invite me, I say no. That's the... That's the contract. And then out of the blue, I got an invite... Did I talk about this last time? Stop me if we did.

Michael? Adele. I got invited to Adele. An evening with Adele? Which you didn't even get invited to, right? No. This was blue chip. This was really blue chip.

This is only a few years ago. Wow, okay. Blue ship. Out of the blue, I was thinking, this can't be for me. This is sort of wrong. I never met Adele. She must love you.

I love Adele. She must love you. She's okay in that list Adele's not inviting you unless Adele wants you And I say yes because I think I can't turn this down Because my daughter, Fred, the 21 year old Would love to go to this

Yeah right So I say to her I said I've been invited to this audience With Alan Carr Do it as a surprise for her Oh right I say it's an audience with Alan Carr She's a big fan of Alan's who isn't

And so she keeps Go-Mah and Nick Mahabed up she gets all dressed up we're in a taxi you get there and we pass a huge billboard right so the pladium yeah huge billboards so it's intimate you know quite yeah and it's got audience with adele big picture of adele right and she looks up and she points that she goes oh that'd be a good one to go to

and I'm thinking she doesn't clock to it and we get to the I feel like I'm gonna cry it's so emotional we get to the foot of the palladium steps and there's like a greeter with the she said you're here for audience with the dell and uh and i said i go to freddie it's an audience with the dell she gets yeah very funny like that oh and and then the girl says if you're a big fan of and then suddenly it dawned her i've got a video oh wow wow and we walk up right

we walk in and uh we go down these stairs and coming up you know that spiral staircase yeah Coming the other way, Stormsy. Oh, wow. And he goes, Erie, legend. No, yes, Harry! Oh, my God. And he gives me like a hug. And I've got, you know, my 21-year-old before. No, no.

And I've got my 21-year-old. Does it get any better than that? Oh, my God. So I don't need to go to any more. Oh, that's incredible. It was fantastic. What did she say after the Stormsy thing? She must have been in shock.

She was like, and he's really tall. I mean, he's big. Yeah, he's big. So that was good. They were all there. I mean, Dewe Leeper was there, right? She's like sitting in front of us. You know, all these really massive names.

And old Brian Cranston, you know, Oh, yeah, Breaking Bad. Oh, Breaking Bad was there. And he was like quite, he was a little bit awkward. Yeah. Because at one point, everyone starts getting up and dancing. Yeah. He's got that slight sort of, you know, middle to a dell.

It's hard to dance to a little. And so I'm like one of the last people to get up. because I'm sort of, you know, white middle-aged. Yeah, I'm in the, yeah, I'm in the, yeah, I'm in the, I'm in the, I'm in the, I'm in the, I'm in the, yeah, I'm in the, yeah, I'm in the, yeah, I'm in the, he wouldn't let me, he wouldn't let me in, and I look across the aisle, and this Brian crans, I stand up, and I go, come on, Brian, and we both get out. I don't know who the hell I am, and, uh, yeah, it was great. Oh, wow, that must have been incredible. Yeah, you want to have met Alan Carr then as well, because. because he was, he got on, didn't he famously got up and had to sing. He was so funny.

Yeah, he was so funny at that. Yeah, he was really funny. They cut a lot of that out. And actually, Adel was really funny. She comes on, she's like a female, Alan Carr. She's going, oh, no, don't all this, you know, sort of, doing a sort of Frankie Howard act. Really funny, yeah.

It was a really great night. That must be such an amazing thing to do with your daughter. Yeah. Is there questions? Is it like an audience with? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And have you done, have you been on the other, have you done an audience with Harry Hill?

you're joking yeah i did you do it oh god yeah yeah yeah my wife to this day describes it as the worst night of her life oh my so this was one of them old-school ones we're in a tv who was in the audience it was the dying days of you know like when it started victoria word ken dodd those guys billy connolly you know yeah yeah bob roncast relaunched his career off the back they'd all be there you know sean connery would be there michael kane you know so who did you have So I didn't want to do it, right? My agent at the time, when I first started doing TV burp, my agent... It's a difficult thing to turn down, isn't it?

Not for me, I thought it was a bad idea. And he goes to me, he said, we keep hearing from ITV. No one knows who you are. Which is like a nice thing to hear. And I say, wow, yeah. I said, but maybe if they gave TV burp a better slot, they want you to do this audience with, they say it's no way,

you know, people don't know me. So do that boost your profile? Yeah. They say it's guaranteed. For an audience with, isn't it? Exactly the wrong way around. It's not a profile booster, it's, you've got that. Well, I suppose if you really slayed it, or if you were,

anyway, he goes, it's a guaranteed audience of, I don't know, whatever it was, you know, 50 million. And it was fantastic money. And it was, you got paid X amount of money. And then when it was, repeated you got the same amount back and now for listeners normally

what happens is you get like a knock off 10% or nothing or nothing so in the end he wore me down I said I said who would come right this is the meeting he goes looks me in the eye and he goes David Bowie right

cut to the night of the thing is Richard Stilgo sat next to Chris Akabusi Dave Gorman who's with your agent at the time Is Richard Stilgo? Exactly. Oh.

Well, he was on TV in the 70s. Okay. Yeah, he was like a, he did like topical songs and a humorous song. Very, very, very, very good. But no Bowie. Nice guy, but not exactly David Bowie. Anyone else? Well, the biggest name was Chris Tarrant.

Oh, right? And he was there. Quite vogue at the time because of who wants to be a millionaire. Yeah. So that was a massive show. And no offense. Are they getting paid to come? No offense.

No, no, no, don't think so. Have you been? Maybe, but I mean... You didn't get paid to go to Adele. No. I didn't get paid to go to Adele. And there was no after show, weren't they? No.

For me, anyway. They were that filtered off, you know. So Chris Tarant, he's a very tall bloke. Yeah. And obviously, what we needed was him laughing. And I think they even had a light on him. You know, like... And he didn't laugh once.

And the reason I know that is that we went through... He had a camera on him. And he chuckled a couple of times, but he didn't really laugh. And I'm not kidding, right? I go on. And I'm thinking, I'm doing the act right, and I'm thinking, you know, that voice in your head. And I'm thinking, okay, this is tough.

This isn't the sort of homecoming gig you're hoping for. Then about 20 minutes in, I thought, actually, people are going to start leaving. I'm going to be like the first, seriously. They can rename it an audience without. Yeah, I'll be the first one where they have to sort of stop it. Offway. Anyway, and I told this to Paul O'Grady sometime later.

And he said, oh, God, he said, I felt the same. He goes, he said, I felt like, I said to Ken Dodd, this is Paula Grayie. He said, I said to Ken Dodd, I felt like crying. And Ken Dodd said, I did cry. Oh my God. Unless if you watch it, it's fine. They dubbed the laugh, son.

It's not brilliant, but the ratings weren't great, and they never repeated it. Oh. But TV burp got the boost and huge. There you go. You said like his panicked agent. Yeah. Can I ask you about Cynthia Arrivo?

Yeah, yeah. We had her on. Yeah, we gave her a big... She was on the X Factor musical. Yeah, she had the lead role in the X Factor. So I didn't realize this. Me and my friend Steve Brown wrote. So I loved the X Factor musical.

I went the same light as our mutual friends Stuart Lee, in fact. Oh, okay. I remember you come. in I think yeah and it was Josh he's in Josh he's in it yeah I'd be game Cynthia has spotlight on me he's not laughed once I just when she was first started then Cynthia so she was I didn't realize she was a big West End so first West End thing until Charlie Baker who was in it told me she was that had a

brilliant voice yeah I mean it was obvious that she was gonna make it yeah yeah she had a brilliant voice cut glass voice yeah and that song I can't sing you know relies on it going all the way up to this like top note that no one else that we audition could get. Yeah. And Steve used to joke that we booked her for one note. Did you have some good celebs at that? That was another beef.

So Simon's people, so Simon surrounds itself with a lot of people. And his principal guy was Nigel Hall, right? He used to produce stars in their eyes, in its heyday before I ruined it. And he's like, he's from Manchester, I remember very camping, he's like, he said, we'll sort out, we'll get one direction,

we'll be along. I know, every impression I do sounds like Helen Cut. We'll get one direction, we'll get, you know, a little mix, we'll get all this lot. Come the nights, Union J, remember Union. Silla was there. Silla was there, yeah, Terry Wogan. It's a bit of a, you know, Philip Green was there.

Remember him? Oh, yeah, the disgrace top shot? And he's like two rows in front of me. And he turns around, right, in the interview, he goes, Ah, he goes, sir, he said, you should have had a word with me? I could have given you some jokes. You know, one of those. Oh, God.

Yeah. Oh, God. That show only ran for six weeks. It didn't only run for six weeks, did it? And it lost about four million quid, and that is the only silver lining is that I think a lot of that money was Philip Green. Yeah. certainly wasn't mine. Yeah, it's like an elaborate joke that.

It was like a sort of... That must have been a surreal period. It was fantastic. It was the most fun I ever had. It was a lot of attention and pressure, though, isn't it something so big? I didn't feel it. Did you feel afterwards, obviously, because it only run for six weeks. I was upset.

I was really disappointed. But actually, at the time, you know, putting it, the writing it was a, you know, it was a, you know, it was a doddled. Working with Steve, the songs were really good fun. And the whole showbiz thing. You got singers, you've got dances, you know, it's like pure showbiz. We're in the palladium, you know, so I'm going in every day. I'm going to work. And I said to the producer, I said, we'll need an office at the pladium.

We said, we need a dressing room. Okay, so they gave us the dressing room. So why I used to do, because we'd be writing up to the minute, you know. Why used to do, go to the stage door, oh, hello, Mr. Earl, you know, come in. Go out to my dressing room, hang my coat up and go and sit in the auditorium. That was some total of the use. of the So now your kids are older

When do you do your family time then Because obviously is it just You wait for Christmas and Easter to come around Are you still doing big family holidays? Family time Well like a set Yeah Is it or is it just whenever they're

Because you know They're at the age Where they're just off and out in the world Are they ghosting in and out of the Hill residence? They come in and out You know I mean They still want to come on holiday with us

Because you pay Because it's like a fancy holiday And Actually, Winnie came... So when they ask you when the next holiday is, will they be pestering you slightly? No, but there'll be some discussion about where we're going to go. I mean, we always have nice holidays.

It's one of the things that we always like splash out on. And Winnie came on it, and she said to me, she's like sitting on this sun lounge, you know, with a sort of cocktail and a, you know, a couple of baby bells and an olive. And she goes, oh, I've forgotten, this is my heritage. the rest of the time she's in a pokey flat in Canber. It's an odd.

It must be very odd for them. Yeah, to jump between that. What's your best? We asked Prince and Zim Hamad this. Classic. How many kids has Nassim got? Three, actually. And they're a similar age.

That have sort of flown the next. If you shut your eyes now and could go back to time, when are you happiest with the kids? What moment is it? I don't know. We had a lot of fun. We had a lot of fun. We still have a lot of fun.

You know, it's sort of the same. You know, we spend a lot of time in Wittstable down on the coast there, and we had a lot of great summers down there. Yeah. And I recently bought a boat, you know, like one of those cheap inflatable boats. It's got an outboard motor on.

It's like the basic model, right? It's essentially, the broker sold it to me. He said it's like, you know, two people. You maybe get three people in anyway. I said, let's get the boat. Let's take the boat out. First time we take the boat out. one of the kids

packs a thermos and some sandwiches like we can like you're the famous five yeah like we're heading out to some sort of the other one's got like a long denim dress on and he's wearing clogs

this is like a rubber dinghy we get in this thing and everyone is just obviously all the people on the beach oh look it's Harry Hill so we're like a public spectacle and I'm trying to get the thing you know we all get in and it's really low the water

and the waves and it starts sort of filling up with water and we go for about and I'm worried that we're going to run with petrol and we're going to get swept out to sea we go about 100 yards up turn around bring it back come back out again and we were all like crying with laughter

and you know and that's the great I think that's a great thing about a family. You know, I think it's a lot of work, isn't it, kids? But for those moments, there's something about you, you just have this, I mean, obviously, you probably don't even need to say it, but it's a kind of bond like no other. You know, it's like you've been through thick and thin, and you've got all this shared sort of jokes and shorthand.

Yeah. It's sort of a bit like what you have with a friend, but like times a hundred. and that just carries on. That carries on, you know, as long as you're talking to each other. Yeah. My daughter was cutting some, she was cutting some carrots up and she couldn't get through. And I said, it was like half in. So sometimes I like doing this.

You know, you just like bang it down. And as I did that, the bottom of the carrot went straight at her head. And that bounced off her glasses. It went, but ding, that's a cartoon. Like, wow, like that. And I was like that. And I was like, no, first of it. Oh, my God, are you okay?

And she was like, yeah, I'm fine. And then we both just like wet ourselves laughing And just like that little moment now Like you know And it was in the shop the other day And my daughter just lifted a carrot up And raised her eyes And it was just like

You know like you on the boat And stuff like that It's sort of quite magic really Those little moments that come out of nowhere Yeah exactly And are they Because you're wife's an artist And you're a comedian

Stroke musical writer I think I've written me last musical I think you're but Harry's an artist that just decided to do comedy let's be honest Well you are you also do Are they artistic and creative

That's what they do You know I mean I don't want to kind of talk about them Without talking to them about it But I mean they're in You know One's a painter One's a ceramicist

The other one's doing textiles Which is why I have to keep working Couldn't one go into the stock market Yeah At a 9 to 5 What's wrong with a 9 to 5 Yeah Get a travel card.

You're at least for a doctor for a few years, weren't you? He tried. The what is the name of the new podcast? The Harry Hill Show. Harry Hill Show. Perfect. And when's it available? So the Harry Hill Show goes out every Monday from the 19th of January.

This will be after that, went to you? So the Harry Hill Show goes out every Monday. Every Monday. Every Monday. And you want to watch it really because you can watch on Spotify, YouTube. Because I think if you are just listening to it, There's people laughing and you won't know why they're laughing. This is basically Harry Hills, TV, all the best shows, but with full creative control,

with no channel, no agent, no one telling me what you to do, just whatever you want to do. Yeah, and me paying for it. Nish Kumar, he says it on that trailer, he says, we had Nish on, he's so funny, isn't he? And a brilliant audience. Yeah, he laughs. He will laugh and laugh. He's got a fantastic laugh, which makes everyone feel good. at one point he goes to me

he goes it's like you're self-funding your own nervous breakdown they did feel like that the first one we did was James Acaster right I was all over the place because you know I'd had to get all the stuff in and you know it's a real

skeleton crew I didn't know what I was doing you know and I didn't know another way to put Gary and all this and James is quite dry you know he's like you know and it's really pick stuff apart as well

yeah and it was really and I was like cold sweat thinking this is terrible right we finished the thing and I say to I say to the you know producer I said it's tough

he goes there's lots of really funny stuff you know like they always do lots of really funny stuff yeah there was some good laughs okay fine and I'm that night I can't sleep I'm rolling around the bed thinking what I'm doing is madness

you know so the next day I go in Freddy comes in with me my daughter half an hour in I say to her I said, yeah, because yesterday's one was really hard work. And she said, yeah, the producer said to me it was an absolute car crash. Oh my God. Yeah.

So I haven't seen that one edited, but... Thanks, Harry Hill, everyone. Harry Hill, what a gentleman. I love that. Yeah, he's such a nice bloke. You love Harry Hill as well, though. He's one of my Hall of Famers. Is he?

So my Hall of Famous when we go out. My Mount Rushmore growing up, a Skinner, Hill, and then... Day Medner Everidge. Day Medner Average. Rod Hull. And, yeah. And, um, Bernard Manny. Mike Reed, the radio presenter.

No, Frank Butcher. Right, Frank Bucer. Mike Reed, the stand-up, yeah, sorry. Yeah, but not. I love Mark Reed. What, Frank Butcher? Yeah. Frank Butcher.

Should we go? Yeah. Bye. Hello, parenting hell listeners. Recognize that voice? Yes. It's Josh Whitakam here. I have got a new podcast, Josh Whitickam's Museum of Pop Culture.

And I'm going to say it, I'm about 85% sure you're going to love it. Here are the reasons why. Number one, I'm confident if you're listening now, you don't hate me, and possibly think I'm funny. Number two, I'm confident if you're listening now, you like podcasts. Number three, I'm confident if you're listening to me and Rob, you prefer pop culture to people talking about things, let's be honest, boring things like history, economics or politics. I know I do, and that is why I made this podcast I wanted a show that tells the stories I love from popular culture in the way other podcasts do for drier topics.

See above. Basically, I wanted a podcast that realized Millie Vanilli were more interesting than Elizabeth I first. Join me as I give the definitive, or at least the funniest, takes on Mr. Blobby. When Ghost Watch convinced BBC viewers, ghosts were real, when a band burned a million pounds for a laugh. The Spice Girls, a truly catastrophic Spider-Man musical

with music from you too and David Hasselhoff, Baywatch, and his part in the fall of the Berlin Wall. All of them are real, by the way. Either you know what these things are and you're about to learn far more about them than you ever realised you wanted to, or you don't, and you're about to be introduced to some of the maddest things in modern or ancient history. Stiffnecks will learn, lose next will laugh. New episodes available every Wednesday and Saturday. Perfect to fill those gaps between your weekly doses of parenting hell.

So go on. You might as well listen, subscribe and follow wherever you. you get your podcasts now. Museum of Pop Culture with me Josh Whitacom, available everywhere from the 1st of January.