Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S7 EP13: My Calves Never Get Cold

Episode Date: September 5, 2023

More misadventures in parenting (and beyond) with Rob and Josh... Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Please leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xx If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: [e-mail] INSTAGRAM: @parentinghell Join the mailing list to be first to hear about live show dates and tickets, Parenting Hell merch and any other exciting news... MAILING LIST: parentinghellpodcast.mailchimpsites.com  A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. And I'm Josh Winnockham. Welcome to Parenting Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So, to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern-day parenting, each week we're chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're they're tha th hearing from you the listener with your tips, advice, and of course, tales of parenting woe. Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times when none of us know what we're doing.

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Join us at Building Better Schools. A message from the Elementary Teachers Federation of Ontario. Hello, you're listening to Parents in Hell with... Rex, can you say Rob Beckett? Peket. And can you say Josh Widdicum. Josh, come, good morning. That's actually a bonus one. They've sent both their children. Here it is.

Can you say, Rob Beckett. Can you say Rob Beckett? Can you say Josh Whitticom? A jost a cunt. Good boy. There we go. You call you a k'k. He didn't call me a k'k.

Did it? Let's have a listen. I'll just have a listen. I just a ko'k. Oh, do you b bleeping that? Don't know. Not his bit. No. You'll understand what we're saying by what he said.

This is a 24-month-old Artie and Rex. Having a go at the intro. We love listening to, oh, they must be twins. We love listening to your podcast gets us through. Please find some more stories of twin parents to keep it sexy and relatable for families and multiples. Yeah, we do need to find some more celebrity twin parents. Who's got twins? Jedwood's mom and dad. They're on the show. Love from Emily and Josh in Notting. We do try and get a reale to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to their to to their their their to to their their to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their twin. twin. twin. twin. twin. twin. twin parents. twin parents. twin parents. twin parents. twin parents. twin parents. twin parents. twin parents. twin parents. twin p. twin p. twin parents. twin p. twin p. twin p do try and get a real cross-section of people, but it's sometimes difficult to get people that are known and available. We're really struggling with people that have undergone tough divorces. They're not as in

up for it. Yeah, that's the thing. We do want to speak to more people that are like either you know divorced or single parents or whatever, but sometimes not everyone's keen to discuss. What I would say say th say th say th say th say th say thi thi th say thi thi thi th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi to to to to to to to to to to thi thi to to to to to to to to to to to to to thi. We thi. We thi. We thi. We thi. We thi. We thi. We thi. We thi. We thi thi thi th. We thi th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We thi th. We thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. theeei. toei. toean. toean. toean. toean. toean. toean. toei. theateeeee. We're th discuss. What I would say is though we don't pay our guests so if you did come on you wouldn't have to give them half. That would be the one bonus. How are you Josh? I'm very good. The last time we spoke I'm dipping for the line of the summer holidays Rob. What's that? You're dipping for the line? I'm dipping for the line. And it's still a long way away. Because the last time we spoke we did we we we did. We we did. We we. We did. We did. We did. We did the the the the the the the the the th. We did. We did. We did. We did. We did. We did. I the the the the the the the the the the th. We the th. We th. I th. I th. I th. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I'm, I don't. I'm, I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I....................................................... the, the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the.'re dipping for the line? I'm dipping for the line and it's still a long way away. Because last time we spoke, we did a quick John Richardson's sort of intro, which was more about John Richardson and the strokes. However, the time before that, I was just going off on holiday. You were very busy. Yeah. How you're feeling? Well, I would say I'm not on my most spiritually enlightened. No, okay. the summer holidays not as fun as you think they might be. Not very spiritually enlightening. No. Well, I told you this last time didn't I? I got to the three-week mark

and I said to Rose I don't know all the fusses about. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I remember that, yeah. And it's been tough since. Last week it was fine, but... Can I say something that they'll make th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thiiiiiiiiiii. thiiiiiiiii. thii thii thi thi thi thi thi thi th'll make you annoyed. Yeah. You know my brother who said like oh one after a couple of months the baby will be fine will be on top of it. It is? Yeah his baby sleeps 11 hours a night. Oh my God. Every night. Oh my God. All the way through and you're enough. Wakes up one quick feed but then. Our bedtime's a fucking right off at the moment. From start to end. We don't have a bedtime routine anymore. No, but when you've got a two-year-old Rob, you forget how resistant they are to things. He doesn't want to do bedtime, and so everything's a battle, except he will go to sleep. You can't just leave him in the room to sort of watch telly or iPad or read. He can't put himself to bed. No. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. thahahahahahahah. thage. thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty. thirty. thirty. thirty. thirty. to to to to to to to to to to throw. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the. the. the. the. put himself to bed. No. The or solution, we don't really do bedtime, doesn't work with a two-year-old. I forget you got two.

Oh, do you know what? I think you're wasting your time, let him bath himself, get changed and then get him back. Yeah, just don't have a play and then pop himself in bed. Yeah, it's fucking mental. to be such a bad. the their. their. their. tha. tha. tha. tapha. taph. taph. taph. taph. taph. taph. to. taph. to. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. too. too. too. too. too. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. to. to. to. tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooe. tooe. quick these are just such precious moments you miss him. He is great for the rest of the day but at bedtime his his can do attitude is fucking annoying. In what way? He's just so positive during the day and then that positivity at bedtime needs to fucking rain his neck in right. That I want to play. So he's too positive at

bed as well? Yeah because he's like I want to play, you know I don't want to get out of the bathroom, I don't want to go to bed. He loves life too much, Rob. Has he got a nap in the day? Yeah, but you can't take that away or he goes insane. It's not that. He's not tired because when he gets in bed he's the the heats heats heats heats heed heed heed heed heed heed he's not he's not he's not he. There he. There he. There the he. There he. There he. There's not he. There's not he. He's not he's not he's not he. He's not he's not he's not to to to to he he he he he he he he he he. He's he he he he he he he he he he he he he he. He's not he. He's not he. He's not he. He's not he. He's not he. He's not he. He's he. He's he. He. He. He. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's not he. He's not to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to daytime nap, that panic you didn't like that. On a Saturday Rob, I'd take the freedom. I'm anchored to the fucking house. What times is that? 12 to half two? Oh, it's a long nap. Can't you shorten the nap.

No, because it's the best bit of to bed at night. He is! He's not... It's not that he's not... He was exhausted last night. No, no, as soon as he gets in bed he goes to sleep. But you can't get him into the bed. He just wants to live his life. Maybe if you've shortened it by an hour, he may go to bed an hour earlier, he may go to bed. No, no, no. No, no, no. Okay. that. It feels. that. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. He he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he. He just he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he. He he he he he he he he he he he he he just just just he he he he he th. He just he he th. He just he he he he he he he he he he just just he he he he he he he he he he taking two and a half, I'm just saying, if he's taking two hours 45 to get him into bed and he's sleeping for two and a half. No, no, no, no, that's both of them. Right, okay, yeah. He's taking an hour, but it's the longest hour of my life. Yeah, right, okay.

The hour is get him up there, get him up battle, they draw battles, dry him, put on his ex-McReme, get him into his bedroom, put on his nappy, put on his sleeping clothes stuff, let him play with my daughter. Sounds like your bedtime. Read some books, watch some videos on the iPad of songs, calming songs, get in bed. Every single one of them is a battle. He doesn't want to do any of them. No. I just think you need to shorten the nap. That's all I'm saying. You're an idiot. That's my instinct. Okay. I'm an instinct. Well, I don't want your instinct.

You kin't want your instinct. Your kids get up at half, five. They won't go to bed. They just come down. They just watch. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. their. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. tho. tho. their. their. thi. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. th. I'm. t t t t ttttttoda. ttte. tte. te. tte. th. th thi. thi. thi. I'm. I'm that? Just be more chilled out with the bedtime? I'll be honestly I genuinely couldn't be more chilled out with the bedtime because I don't know what time they go to bed, I don't know everything they washed last night, is getting feral in our house. Is that summer holidays? I feel like, yeah, I feel like now I'm not really a dad anymore. I've just got two lodgers. that's what it feels that's what that's what th. That's what th. That's what it's what's what's what's what's what's what's what's what's th. That's what's th. That's th. That's they. That's they. That's th. th. th. th. th. they's th. they're they're they're th. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they's. I'm they's. I'm they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. they's. I's. I's. I's. I's they's they's they's they're they're they're they're they're they're they. I. I's th. I's th. I's th. I'm today. I'm today. I'm today. I'm today. I'm today. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm they're th. I'm like. But because they're getting old now, we came back from the holiday in Spain, so they've been staying up later.

Obviously, classic British Airways, Josh, you know you love them, but a council flight, a few days before. Why do you do it yourself, Rob? But what I would say to them is, they're very good on the app to rebook the council flights. So they've not solved one problem, but once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once the flights, the flights, the flights, the flights, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their cites cites, their cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites. their cites cites. their cites, their cites, their cites, their cites, their cites. their cites. their cites. their cites. their cites. their their cites cites cites, their their their cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites cites, theira, theira, their, their, say that is faint price. Also as well I didn't know I'm a silver member of BA I didn't realize. It doesn't surprise me you're on planes every fucking day of the week. I know and I don't know what that means but then when we were queuing up for an hour at Malagre Airport and I got to the front and there and there there there there there was was was like there there there there there there there there there there there was like there there there there there there there th th th th th th th th th th like th like th like th like tho tho thi thi th in the... Oh no. And she was like, you could have gone in there, you know, but you know what? I don't want to be in there. Because all the people in there, a big, fat-bellied, red-faced old men that stomp through.

Excuse me, I've actually got my loyal to... I just look at him. I'd rather wait here. I'd rather wait here than be part of that fucking thi-a th. The old silver membership gang. Oh, silver back, silver membership, red face, fat bastard gang, shuffling through their briefcase and their sad dreams. I feel I'm going to be that fat bloke. Give it another few years. You won't ever have a briefcase. The thought of you in the briefcase.

Excuse me? Nothing in it. Another little bottle of squaw. Just a game boy. Just my DS- a d- switch that's what I've got you know I'm gonna around with you too much but do you want to hear about the holiday should I talk to you about what happened yeah and then I'll tell you about my morning not morning this morning a morning right so my kids are five and seven aren't they nearly eight and six so they near enough say all they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th are th are th are th are th are th are th are th are thoooooooooo their they. their their their their their they? Nearly eight and six. So they're near enough say all words correctly, apart from a couple.

Oh yeah, here we go. And me and Lou have decided that we're not going to correct them on these ones to see how long it lasts. Yeah. So we've got suppitious for suspicious. Sopicious. That's very suppicious. And alcoholic is aloholic. Why are you talking to them Rob about

Alcoholics suspicious and obstacles. I'm suspicious he's an alcoholic No, what no because I'm suspicious the mommy's alcoholic I'm not it's clear as day No, because when we was on holiday they said do you want some special special kid champagne? It was that scorbry fizzy stuff. She said, this isn't an aloholic, is it? Oh, yeah. Also, we ventured into a new stage of dinner time, Josh, of no iPads at the dinner table on holiday. Whoa, now.

Now, we've discussed this before being on holiday, thrown. before we had kids and seeing a family with their kid with an iPad and thinking that is a shame. Yep, same here. And now, yeah, now I just do anything for my children to just sit at the table just a little bit longer on holiday and buy that a little bit longer. I mean at least until my main has arrived. Yeah, yeah and until you can eat without feeling sick. But well no, mine are older now. So you can chat to them and like, we've been playing Uno with them. Yeah, they're like playing Uno. I mean, the tears and tantrums at losing, but they've got to learn. What is Uno?

It's a card game, thrown, isn't it? Uno's like a card game, simple that young kids can, you know, my five-year-olds playing it and stuff, but they're just so obsessed with winning. But then you find like they're having absolute complete tantrums and meltdowns over UNO. And they're like, wouldn't it be better? But they were so tired as well. So we did, the first two nights with iP hell and we were like, we should have brought the card. There was one night where my daughter was so tired and so fed up and stress. And she, she's been quite rude and I was like, no, say please and thank you. She was sort of like refusing.

And then she was playing with her water and then she smashed like, like knocked over her water and it and it fell on the floor. And then the customer service at this at this at this at this at this at this at this at this at this hotel was amazing and I don't know why it was so good. I don't know if they were paid more so that's a selling point for that hotel or it felt like the only other reason would be that the owner of the hotel was taken all their families hostage and they've been forced to work until they come home safe. Well, I wouldn't rule it out. Maybe five star on than in England. Did the manager kiss the waitress on the lips to thank her for... No, he didn't that. He grabbed his groin after every call.

And anyway, so she spilled this water. And anyway, so she spilled this water because she was like being a bit like trying to sleep in the chair and being a bit thing. But she was tired, she was to, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, thired, she, she, thired, she, she, she, she, she, she, she'd, she, she, she, she, she, she, she'd their. their, thi, their, toed, toed, toed, toed, toed, toed, toed, toed, toed, toed, to kissed, to kissed, to kissed, to kissed, toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. the the the the the the toed, the the the toed. toed. toed. toed. toed, toed. toed and then the guy went on his hands and knees to clear this water up and my daughter, I looked down, refused to move her feet so he could wipe under her thing. Oh my god, I nearly fucking decapitated her. Yeah, that is. I was like, the anger levels of just like, and it toughs. And I took to this nice hotel. You're being rude. Yeah, yeah. water which is fine people have vaccines but now you're refusing to move your feet while someone tries to wipe under your feet what have I bred you know

all this kind of thing and I was just so oh god so angry but then I was like like I calm down a bit I was like no they've just been forced to sit at it was an all inclusive so you basically sat down eating three times a day seven days a week but like in the end she said to the man sorry to the man the man the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th I'm th is th is th is th is they. they. I'm they. I'm so their I'm so I'm so I'm so I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th I I I I I I I I I I I I I th I th is I th is so I th is so th is so th is so th is so the I'm the an toy. try toy toy toy te I'm try try try. try the I'm so the I'm so the I'm so I'm so th to the man, sorry and moved her feet and stuff like that, but this rage that went through me. I was like, this is not okay. Because it taps into various things, doesn't it, like, that you're so worried about creating within your child, like entitlement. Yeah, holidays is our thing, mine and that's what we spend our like money on, we don't have you know much other flash stuff or anything. I'd say Rob holidays is a hundred percent your thing. Some people buy a flash watch, some people like cars, some people like madhouse or whatever for us

we spend all our money on holidays. Some people buy a flash watch and then they can't go in the sea on holiday Rob. Exactly. People aren't different so I'm just sort of like every part of me was like and then as I did that the other one was picking a nose and I was like, the other one was picking her nose, and I was like, don't pick your nose. She went, I'm not picking it, I'm scratching it. I was like, how do you prove otherwise? I ignored that and then we're sort of telling one off. And the other one is now drinking ice cream out of a bowl. So it's all just kicked off completely. And then, wait, it's not happening. We just agreed to look the

other way while she drunk ice cream out of a bowl, Josh. And then I became that parent that I'm like, don't just pretend it's not happening. My back was against the wall it was. And I left that. And normally my children I pride myself and they're very polite. Yes very well behaved. Very kind, you know, genuinely, you know, and if they ever are. But three nights of Uno can push people too far. I tell you the problem you've got is I'll let my daughter win at snakes and ladders but there's only one of her. Yeah. Because my son's obviously too young to play snakes and ladders. So you aren't in a position with uno where there's ever going to be a game where one of your daughters isn't going to be pissed off.

No, but what you can do is like when the other parents there you can sort of stitch them up slightly or whatever. But the other day, both of us, me and me and Luke got out straight away, it was a head-to-head between the two daughters. Oh, no. Oh, no. th. So, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, they. they. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their. Oh, their. Oh, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th th th th th th th th th th thea. th tha. tha. little father-side thing and they wanted to play football so playing football one was in goal and then the other one wanted to just play against me it was first to 10 and obviously I'm better than her at football because she's seven to play and she was like I was letting her score and all that and you're like yeah I'm so good at football I'm better than than you but and I was like I'm gonna to thrown it the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the to the to the the the the the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to the the to the the to to the the the the I'm gonna to to to to just I'm gonna the the the the the the the other I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to the the to the the to the the the the the the the the-all then I scored the winner and I was like I can't just allow

her to win and think that she's just like, because she was giving it a massive large one and I was like no I won that and then she was like oh I went but did you enjoy it she was like yeah I don't think we should just let them win everything at this at this age she's seven nearly eight right we've got to get to a point where like no, there are levels to this, right? And I am better than you. I didn't say this to her. No. However, I was just sort when it came to the final kick, I'm not missing on purpose to let her win. What does that teach you? And Lou, was like, are you saying like someone of GB News? Yeah, but they't know the right but I can't just keep letting them winning that everything Yeah, what do you think? I don't know what to do when they're young It's difficult because do you know what when I let my daughter win it? And I'm not smashing them

It's not like 10-nil you finish let's go out. It's like I'm letting them get a few in and going oh well-done and she's not really that into competitive sports in that sense. She's more into gymnastics or throwing herself off the sofa and stuff. Yeah. But it might come. I can never believe that she can't see what I'm doing. Like I find it baffling that your daughter can't see that you're easing off. Because in my head I'm like, well he's fucking 37 mate. He plays football every Tuesday. Do you genuinely believe it's 9-all? I can't believe this. Yeah, I wouldn't say that to her. No, no, no, but I can't believe it when the kids fall for

it. You know what I mean? So you're like, well this is a bit of harmless fun and then you're like, no, they're genuinely think. And then it's like, oh, I'm like, they're they're like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm like, I'm th. I'm like, I'm th. I'm th. I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm th. I'm thi, I'm like, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thin, I'm thin. I'm thin. I'm thin. I'm thin. I'm thin. I'm thin. I'm thin. I'm thoan. I'm thin. I'm thin. I'm th. I'm don't care if she thinks that. I'm not like, no, actually, let's break this down. That was a great performance from it. But I'm like, she can't just live a life thinking, does she, because everyone should never get better then. Writing with your stories of. Well, yeah, how do you compete against your children? Because the Barry Hearn, Eddie Hearn thinn thinn is. did Barry Hearn not let Eddie Hearn win. Barryher went 100% and would be bowling at a seven-year-old at about 70 miles an hour in cricket. I don't want to do that. No, that I don't think's okay. I think that's too far. However, there's got to be a bit of middle ground,

isn't there? I'm just trying to think what my, don't know, did I compete against my dad probably was eating off. Well, don't you know what used to really annoy me, really frustrate me is, which I think is quite psychotic actually looking back on it, but my dad would play pole against me and I think my dad's very competitive and we would want to win, and then to try and get in my head, if I was beating him and it was like 12 or 13, so he might be like 12 or 13, so he might be quite th Paul. Yeah, I was good at Paul. That was my sport. He'd go, as I had got like three in a row, go, oh, do you always play properly now then? Oh, I'm like, that's a weird thing to say. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Isn't it? Because I'm like, if he isn't playing properly, and I'm doing really. But you don't need to try and like play mind games, like, Venger and Ferguson, like, oh, should I play properly now? You're like, what the fuck's out? I'm 12, mate. You're 52. I've just realized that's mental, isn't it? It's such a weird area, isn't it?

So do write in. When have you fucked it up? Is what, ideally we're looking for. Or if anyone understands, anyone's like an academic on this year if there is a just let us know what the right some sort of psychologist. Yeah, Philip a Perry level of person, yeah, what should you do with your kid? Yeah. Because I don't want to, I'm not schooling my child to be a cutthrigh. I don't want to do that Barry Hearn thing. No, no. I'm not trying to try and to try to try to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the ta the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the toeckhue my my my my the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their theirpape. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. te. te. te. te. telera. teole. te. te. te. te. te. te. level. the the the the the the the the the the just like trying to understand a level of competitiveness and what to... I think if they come out of it and enjoyed it and they've enjoyed the process, that's the main thing because yeah, whet you do get to a level where you're really good at something, if you don't enjoy the process is pointless. Yeah, she went fucking mental. The crying of just like

instant tears over Uno is insane, but we're learning as a family how to do it basically. That's why Snakes and Ladders is so dodgy, Rob. We played Snakes and Ladders. Yeah. And I'll play this one which is basically like kind of, it's a different version of Jenga. That's quite easy to throw. It's very easy to fuck that up. Snakes and ladders, it's all in the fucking dice and it's brutal. That snake who's on like 98 out of 100. Yeah, you're like, oh my god, I can't do anything about it. You're like you snakey bastard. And you can't lie about, then you can't, you know you're not teaching them to add up properly then? Yeah I'm just like scooting my guy onto the top of a snake and going oh no here

we go back down again. Oh bloody night there but down here again and then I'm like then I see the joy in their eyes and I'm like you fucking loser. Fucking wake up. You know what's going on here. You know what's going on here? You know what to the the the the the to to to to to to to to to to the to to to the to to the to the to the to the the the to the to to the the the go go the the the the the the the the the the the tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' their their down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down down the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th going th going th going th going th going tho tho tho tho tho' the the the the there there there there there there there there there there there there tho thoooooooo' tho' tho tho tho three, that's not fuck about now. Let's play. Do you want me to start trying now? I don't want to start playing, roll the dice and get lucky properly. Can you throw who no? Is it one of those games where you've got enough say-so in it?

Yeah, you can. So what I don't, I don't throw it is quite lucky and it can go on and on. So, but any other games people can recommend to play and stuff like that will take on board. But, but yeah, you just, you want your kids to have been nice and plight, but also have a little bit of personality, but you don't want your kids to be these insane, must win, competitive. I'm competitive, Rob, and it's awful. It's awful, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, Rob. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. Yeah. It's. It's. It's. Yeah. It's. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's. It's. It's. It's trait. Yeah, because you're scared of losing, because it means you're a failure. But what, I think the message is... Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,

no, not you, no, no, no, no, no, no, okay, I'm absolutely not scared of losing. Hey, tell me why, are you not a failure? Why not a failure? See in his watch? Not allowed to to to to to to to to to the the their their, their, their, their, their, their, tha, tha, tha, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, the their, tho, tho, tho, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, woe, the the the thi, the thi, the thi, the their, the the, their, their, the, the, their, their, their, woe, their, woe, woe, woe, wo allowed to take it off outside the house. According to the man of admiral. I'm not afraid of losing. Well, I used to be super competitive. I think as competitive as you, if not more,

I used to Google every comedian that was five years ahead of me, and I would make sure that I was at the same stage or ahead of them in my career as there. Oh my word, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, to, to, to, to, to, to, to to to to to to to to th, to th, to to to to to th, th, to, the, the the, thi, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the, the the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi, thi, the, the, the, the, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, the was at the same stage or ahead of them in my career as there. Oh my word, yeah. So I'm trying to introduce losing and it isn't the end of the world kind of thing. Yeah, rather than, yeah, you've won, you've won. Set to you free. Well, yeah, exactly. And also, what reallyto being a bit spiritual. We don't know what's good news or bad news because we don't know enough about the future. For example, Judge, I broke my ankle playing football and I missed out on there, it was that legaler own road trip. I think I spoke about it's before. I've been booked to do the whole series on that, which would be my biggest sort of exposure, it would be my biggest payday. Before that I wasn't th. I th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. thin. th. thin. thin. thin. throged. to break, I broke. I broke. to break, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke. to broke. I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I broke, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm thro. thro, I'm thro. thro. the the thro. the their. their. B. their. their. their. B. their. their. their. their. throooooo. I broke, I broke odd show here and there and when you're a regular on it you get a bit more money but it's also six episodes rather on one and that was my whole six weeks booked out

and it was the most money I was ever going to earn in like six weeks broke my ankle, missed out on all of it. Then you did some, some other people did some and I weren't on it. Alan did some, Tom Davis did some and all that. Tom Davis did some and all that I was devastated. I couldn't walk, I was sat in my house, lost a load of money, couldn't even go out and do other jobs, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And this was at a point where I wasn't fully established, I hadn't really toured that much, I hadn't done this podcast, haven't done all these other things. And I was sitting there, I'm fucked here. This is all my money and I thought I was working for six weeks, but tha, but thu. But, but thu. But, but, but, thu. But, I, I, I, I, I that, I was that, I was that, I was that, I was that, I that, I was that, I was that, I wasn't, I wasn't, I wasn't, I wasn't, I wasn't, I wasn't thu, I wasn't that I wasn't th. I wasn't thu, I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that I wasn't that, I wasn't th. I wasn't th. I wasn't th. I wasn't thu, I wasn't thus, I wasn't thus, I wasn't tho, I wasn't tho-a, I wasn't fully to, I wasn't fully established thull-a, I wasn't fully established thull-a, I wasn't fully tho tele I've done and but however that may not have happened and if I under broke my ankle and all stuff like that. Exactly. It's sort that where you think you've oh my god I've lost this, I've won that but it's actually if you enjoy in the process of it or and just enjoy each day of it and enjoy the playing of who you know a plane of the football the actual end result doesn't really matter because you don't know what that's going to push you on to achieve. Totally agree Rob. Also being able to fail

is incredibly important. Yeah experiencing failure. It's inevitable. And whatever that means, whatever that means, I know that's like a loaded word, but like things going wrong, you know it's a great experience for you and it can be more helpful than just winning. Well I was trying to do that with the girls. When I was leaving the holiday they loved it so much. I was so sad of like, I don't want to go home, I feel sad and me and Lou were instinctively going, well don't worry, next week we're going to have a barbecue. We're gonna get the dogs back,

you can see Georgry. Exactly. Well, no, but it's like for adults as well, embrace that you feel sad because you can't avoid or distract from emotions. You need to feel them and then understand that they come and they go and nothing's permanent, but trying to be in a constant fix of, this is fun, but don't worry about that. Next week's when it's what we's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, the the the wea, the the th. th. thin, thin, thin, thin, thi, thi, thi, that's, thi, thi, that's, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that you you you you, that you you you, that you you you, you you, that you you you you, you, that you you's, you's, you's, you's, you's, you's, you's, you's, you's, you's, you's, that's, that's, that's thi. thi. thi. thin, thin, thi. thee. thee. that's thin, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's fell into I was like no actually let's just shut up blue and allow him to be a bit sad it's okay to feel a bit sad yeah shut up blue that that's the quote there's the title of the episode shut up blue Miller Light the light beer the light beer the light beer the light beared for people who love the taste of beer and the task the task the the the tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to tas. tas. tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks tasks task task. task. the the the tas. the the the tas. the the tas. the tas. the task. the task the to task to to to the task time. When Miller Light set out to brew a light beer, they had to choose great taste or 90 calories per can. They chose both, because they knew the best part of beer is the beer.

Your game time, tasks like Miller time. Learn more at Miller.c.c.A. Must be Legal Drinking Age. To new friends. I don't find them that pleasant to be around. I guarantee you won't want to leave. Speak no evil is filled with teeth clenching, seek clawing, suspense. Something's not right with him. I've always wanted a family like yours. James McAvoy will scare you speechless.

No! We're going to kill us. We're just sad to see you speechless. Oh! You're going to kill us. We're just sad to see you go. Speak no evil. Only in theaters now. I've got some other stuff from the holiday to go through. Quite funny, um, that I watch football in a shame bar. What a shame bar? Well, it was an all-inclusive hotel hotel and there's basically a discotheque,

because it's a family resort, basically a discotheque, but it was a tiny little room with two screens in, it was basically open from 11 p.m. to 1 a.m. and it's downstairs in the basement next to like the shop of the hotel because it's for the alcoholics to go until the early hours and not keep everyone awake getting drunk on the the the their their. and their. and their is in their is and their is and not. and their is and not their is and not their is and not their is and their is and their is. It was. It was. It was. It was their is. It was their is. It was their is their is their is their is the there's. It was there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there is is there is there is there is there is there is there is their is their is their is their is. their is their is. is. is. is their is their is a their is a their is a their is a their is a their is a their is a little. It is a little. It is a little. It is a little. It's. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's tip. It's tiny. It's tiny. It's tiny. It's tiny. It's tiny tiny tiny tiny there. Ities. What's the word that the Alholic? Alaholics, the Alaholics. And that's where I watched the football because the Premier League was on. I just sat down there with a load of lads, watching the football. And the girls like, you're going back to the basement.

I was like 30 degrees. Oh, no, the game. I fell out with good games. It was Tottenham, Manchester United. I also... So wasn't even your team? I watched three. I watched Chelsea Man United. Three! I watch Man United Tottenham, I watch Chelsea West Ham and I watch Arsenal. Chelsea West Ham! And I watch the women's World Cup final. Four games in the dark.

Four matches in the season so they don't even matter yet. Oh it does matter. I fucking love football. I love football so much. I just love it. It's my little distraction. It's the way like Lou keeps watching the van derpun. Your distraction? It took them all your holiday. Well that was the other thing on the holiday. The girls absolutely love the kids club. Our rule is if they're like it, they they they like it, they like it,'t, we do whatever they want to do. They went in the first day and there was these two English lads called Alfian Sol and they were like kids entertainers types and they went in there. And normally when they go abroad, the Spanish or Greek kids ate it right and my these lads were like one of the games was like smacking you on the head get a sweet which was like they had one them pool noodles where they were just like hitting them on the end and our kids love that face

painting and playing a game where if you got it they tooed water over your heads they loved all they they loved all tho they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they the they the they their they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tttoo ttook took the took the the the the the the the the the they they they they they they they they they they they wanted to go in it with these lads and they're coming out going yeah we love it we love Alfie and Soul we don't like the hotel people I was like don't shout that that's rude you tell us and then they were like can we come back tomorrow yeah and then Alfie and so went oh we're not in tomorrow and that's our in morning and afternoon for five days in a road, Josh. Oh my God. So it was only like two hour shifts, so we were with them for the morning. You were making them cry over breakfast, lunch and dinner playing Uno and then they'd be back in with Alphian's soul.

Who were letting them win. I'll ask him next time if they let them win or not but they absolutely loved it but it was the first time Josh and I bring hope to this episode it was the first time ever on holiday I was bored. Yeah of course you were fucking bored Rob was nothing to do. You were watching fucking Lincoln versus Exeter or whatever you were doing in the dark. No but during the day I went out from a walk in the morning by the way I was walking along Josh I don't know what came over me I was doing my walk in the morning topless you fucking wanker you absolute longer I was walking topless along the sea front you're awful on your own well yeah didn't we're doing look might to get some mates together no I didn't know if it was a family walk or your walk no just so what I do the the the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the I do is in the morning go up have breakfast drop the kids have a kids come and I go for my long like five six K walk along the seafront I put cream on did it's hopeless

well how do you feel about that? I don't know how I feel about that I'm close to leaving the zoom. But it was so hot Josh I didn't have enough tea I didn't have enough tea the try sh jogging so I'll give you that. No I couldn't jog. I started with a vest and I thought you know I'm a bit warm I'm gonna pop this off but that's not me Josh no well it is because you did it yeah but then do you know what made me put my top on straight away you realize who you were no no someone they said they started lining up the selfie for I could put my top on you like so I sort of like he to try to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to put to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to the to. I tip. I tip. I tot. I tot. the tot. I the tot. toe. to to to to to to to to to lining up the selfie before I could put my top on. So I sort of like, he held it, I was just sort of like trying to sink my tits out of shot.

Oh God, oh God. That's horrible. And then I was like, I was laying on the sunbed and I was like, oh, okay, all right. And I was like, I had headphones, I had had had had to be the woman like with me doing a head shot selfie. No, she went with him, her two-year-old, that was like by my knee. That's a full-lemp shot of me in my pants. Headphones in, listening to Leeds versus Sheffield Wednesday. And then, um, Suffolk don't come up to me, Josh, do you ever get people that's a thithey sort of say something weird that you can't compute?

Right, yeah, yeah. This guy can't try, it's laying on the sunbed, headphones, eyes shut, because I don't know about you, that screams, let's do selfies. Yeah. You know, not walking around the resteads, the today. What are you listening to? these soundly good podcast isn't it? Yeah of course yeah. Give him Michael some notes. I tell you what a British scandal with Matt Ford and Alice Levine really really good. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Anyway he went tap me on the shoulder. I'm sort of like off like open my eyes. He went. He went. to the classic one earphone out to go, uh, uh, uh, uh, sorry? He didn't budge, Star Wars?

I was like, I'm sorry, I don't know, I don't know what you say, what's, you're took? I was like, I'm sorry, I don't know what you say, what's it? I went, Star Wars? I don't know what it's, you can't just keep saying Star Wars, don't know what it is. He went, Star Wars, the magic, Vegas, or Romesh. And I remembered in the episode I did Romish about magic, I did a trick where the answer was Star Wars. Fucking out, oh that's a deep dive, isn't it? You did that about a year ago. I know, it's been on recently. So a year ago, I once, I once, I once, I once, I once, I once, I once, I once, I once, I th, I th, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I, I, I did, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, I did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, th... th. th. th. th. thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, thed, the the the the the the the the the the the the, it goes to the telly and it becomes a bigger thing. And he was going, I went, oh yeah, yeah, oh yeah, yeah, I went oh yeah, I went oh yeah, I think, oh yeah, yeah, I'm going, he said Star Wars to me ten times and I was just like, I just don't know what that is. I don't know what that means. And oh what this, I can tell can tell I can tell I can tell tell tell I can tell tell tell tell tell tell tell tell tell tell thell you th th th th say I th say I th. I th. I th. I can that I can that I can that I can th. I the. I can that I can that I can that I can that I can that I can't that I can't that I'm that I'm that I'm that I'm that I'm that I'm that I that I that I th. I th. I th. I th. I they. I they. I they. I they. I they. I they. I they. I they. I they. I they. I th. I th. I tell. I tell. I tell you say say say. I tell you say. I tell you say. I tell. Oh, I tell. Oh, I tell. Oh, I th. Oh, I th. Oh, I th. Oh, I th if you think this is weird. We got chatting to a lady and her son at the hotel. Kids were playing with him in the pool.

Nice boy. He was a bit older than them, so my girls are like, he was about 10 year old to 10 year old, so my girl, oh my god. And he was shaking around, and he was here, he was a little. a 10-year-old boy that's playing with a 7 and a 5-year-old girl, Rob? Well, now you've said it like that with that intonation. They were on his float and he would push it round and shake the float, so he was quite enjoying sort of being the older one. Yeah.

Anyway, he was sat with his mom and it was like, he was like, he was like, he was a father, youngest, where he was like, the to, really, really, really, really, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, he, he was, he was, he was, he was, to, to, and, to, was, was, he was, he was, he was, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, was, and, and, and, was, and, was, and, was, was, and, and, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to.. to. to don't know, I mean, but you know, not everyone has a dad. He may be away or working or he may not see, I didn't say dead, he may not see his dad as much but not everyone has a mom and a dad with them all the time. She went, oh, oh, and then she sort of like went up to him. Oh no, oh,, I didn't give you the options for you to confirm. And then the mum was like, oh no, she basically had a really bad sickness on the morning of the flight. And he was just like, I cannot leave my house. So, but I didn't want to lose the money on the holiday.

Yeah, yad, yad, yad, yeah. So she went off. Anyway, and then we're sitting around the pooling. and they're playing and stuff like that and then all the apple could involve we see a man come over to the mom. Here we go and start hugging and like getting off of her. What was like, I mean it was like drama gossip around the pool what's going on and then we realized it was the dad had surprised them because he felt better and got a flight and come out on the holiday. So then the boy it was like one of them you know dad's the the the boy the the boy the the the boy the the boy the the boy the the boy was like the boy the th the boy was like the boy's th the boy's th th th th th th th th the boy was like the boy was like th the boy was like the boy. the boy was like th tho the boy. the boy. the boy. the boy was like the the the the their their was like their was like. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th was like. was like. was like. was like. was like. was like. was like. was like was like was like was like. was like the boy. was like the boy. was like the boy. th. was like th. th. was like. th. th. th. tho. the tho. I was like. was like. I was like. was like. I was like. was like. I was like the army videos right yeah oh my god that's that's like surprise surprise and then the boy was like he was in the boy who's like dad dad dad and then he gets out the pool and then they have this big family hug and a kiss and I took photos of it did you because I thought it's at their request no that's weird I took a punt I took a pun't they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're their they're they're their they're they're their their their their their their their they're they're they're they're they're their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their they they're they're they're they're they're they're their their their their their their their their their their toy. toy toy. toy toy. toy. they're toy. they're they're they're they're they're their they're their their their their they're their the pool and they have this big family hug and a kiss and I took photos of it. Did you? Because I thought it's... At their request? No. That's weird. I took a punt. Right, Rob, come on now.

I was like I think this is weird. So I took photos of them. So I took the photos and then when she walked past I said oh well that's a nice surprise. You know what just to confirm. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi tho tho tho tho tho tho tho thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, you know, and just to confirm that is your husband, right? Bit of fun. Bit of fun. I didn't know if he was getting off with a waiter. Yeah. Yeah. I didn't know if he was a waiter then you'd be in double bucks because you'd have those photos. Exactly. And you'd be able to go, oh it's not your husband a really sweet moment of you all sort of having a little family hug, so I took some photos. If you give me a number, I can send them to you. And she went, oh, thanks, that's really kind. And then you see them come off my phone because they were opposite and she was like pointing at him, going like that, weird or a nice thing to do. I think it's nice. I did a weird thing Rob. Is this weird? We're the member of the public. I was out with my son

on Thursday. Yeah. We were at the cafe in Victoria Park. Of course you were, yeah. Yeah. Spreading your wings with. And he was having a bun. I could see the stage where the strokes were going to go to. And I I I I I I I I I was I I was I was I I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was the th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was the th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was the the the. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I was the. I was the. I was the. I was the. I was thro thro throooooo theeateatea thro throoooooooooo. I was the. I was the. I was the.two guys behind me. They look like normal East End wankers, yeah? Like me, yeah. Yeah, like sort of the trendy ones, sort of brightly coloured socks, ankles out, those little weird sort of expensive combos. Turned out they were historians. They were historians because I was listening to their conversation. Oh right, yeah, go on. And one of them said, of course Dominic Sandbrook was my lecturer. the the, if you don't know, Dominic Sandbrook is... Of course I don't know who the fuck Sandbrook. He's the history, one of the two historians on the rest is history,

which I listened to. Right, okay, sure. It's in everything history. Well, the rest is history. It's just the 20 minutes later and I thought I'd have loved to have talked to that guy about Dominic Sandbrook. And then the guy turns up at the same slide. With his kids. With his kids. Yeah. And I go, um, I didn't really realize this was weird at the time but then afterwards I told my friend had done this and he was like, that is a weird thing to do. Yeah, go on. I said. I. I. I I I I I I I I I I I I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I could I could I could I could I said I said I said I said I said I I said I said I said I. I I I I I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I said I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't help but hear your conversation in the cafe. You went to the University of Sheffield and your lecturer was Dominic Sandbrook.

Oh yeah? And he said, yeah, yeah. And I said, what was he like? I don't find it weird, but I think you should be embarrassed that you're admitting this out loud. I think it's, yeah. If he'd said that he'd and embarrassment level for a Sambrook. No offence, Adomick. I don't think it's worth the social embarrassment, but I'm not a Sambrook devotee like you. No, and I'm not a Sambruok devotee in that I'm

undecided on him because I don't know what if I agree with his politics. So I said to this guy, so what was he like, oh oh yeah? And he he he he he he he he he he he he he he. He he he he. He he he he he he he he he he he he he he he, he, he, he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he told, and he told, and he, and he told, and he told, told, told, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, th. But, th. But, th. But, th. But, th. But, th. But, th. But, to, to, to. to, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I'm, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. th. th. th. th. are? Because I can't work out how right wing he is. And this guy was like, oh, oh, dear. And then he went, so did you go to the University of Sheffield to me? Yeah. And I was like, no, no, no, I just listened to his podcast. And he looked at me with absolute sadness in his eyes, really. That you're listening to his the the the old the old to to I'm listening to a podcast and then accosting people in the street to say I recently heard them talking in a different location about their lecturer from

uni. Yeah I feel like if in the cafe if you went oh dumb at Sambrook yeah if you'd gone oh that's weird I'm not you could even like I'm listening to his podcast at the moment but to to to to to to to the the the the the he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he the the he he the the the the the the the to to to to to to to to to they I they I'm to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their I'm to they. I'm they. I'm to they. I'm they could they could they could they could they could they could they could they could I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they I they. they. they. I they. I they. I'm they. I'm took took. I'm took. I'm not took. I'm took. I'm not to. I'm today to to they could could could they could could they could the moment, but to go like what's he like and what's his politics? That is quite an intense, because he doesn't really know him, he just got taught by him at uni. Yeah, it was quite a weird moment. So what did he say about his politics? He said he thinks that he's not as right wing as he comes across. Right, okay. It wasn't even that interesting. Was you happy you asked? No, because then the conversation peated out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out, the conversation, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th. th. their, th. th. thi, he he he he's, he's, he's, he he he he he he he? he? he? he? It, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. to, thi. to, to, to, to, to, th. to, thi. to, thi. thi. to, thi. thi. thi. th conversation peated out and then we were still on the same slide for the next 10 minutes. Oh dear. Oh Josh. Yeah. But you know you just wanted to know didn't you? Yeah, I'm just quite a weird bloke sometimes. I'm not going back to university to be your friend. I'm going so I can get Uber one for students. It saves you on Uber and Uber eats. I'm there for zero dollar delivery fee on cheeseburgers, up to 5% off smoothies and 5% Uber cash back on rides. Just to be clear, I'm there for savings. Not whatever you think University is for. Get Uber 1 for students.

A membership to save on Uber and Uber eats. With deals this good, everyone wants to be a student. Join for just $499 a month.9. to. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tooooooooooooooooooooooooo. I. I. I. I. student. Join for just $4.99 a month. Savings may vary. Eligibility and member terms apply. Your mom hates it when you leave six half-full glasses on your nightstand. It's a good thing mom lives on the other side of the country. And it's an even better thing that you can get six Ikea 365 plus glasses for just 999. So go ahead. You can afford to hoard because IKEA is priced for student life. Shop everything you need for back to school at IKEA today. Tell me some more about some holiday stuff.

Can I tell you about my daughter dealing with a naughty kid? Yeah. So there's a naughty kid on holiday that was spraying the lifeguards with a water pistol, which is not on. Oh, come on mate. They're trying to do their job. And the parents were like giggling along. In the end, I just went to the lifeguard, stand behind my sunbed, because he won't squirt me and if he does, I'll rip his fucking head off. Here we go, here we go.

And he was like, oh, see, this is this little fucking kid. Fuck off. This is why I would have got sacked from that kind of job. So, because it's like, they can't, but I'm like, parents who don't tell the kid up. Anyway, you'd love that job because you can't, you're actually encouraged to wear shorts. Oh, I wouldto be that bloke wear shorts all year and that's my thing. Oh do you think you're that guy? Because you know you get them at the front row. There's one of those guys that works at my daughter's school he's he's just shorts all year. Yeah

because my calfs never get cold. They never get cold. Don't get cold. You see Michael. I don't get cold. Don't get cold. Don't get cold. Don't get cold. Don't get cold. Don't get cold. Don't get cold. Don't get cold. Don't get cold. Don't get cold. Don't get cold. Don't get cold. Don't get cold. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get cold. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get. Don't get. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't get the the the the the the the the the th. I don't get th. I get the th. Don't get th. I don't get the th. I don't get the the the the the the the the title. My calfs have never been cold. Fuck off. They never get cold. They never even get... What about your nobly knees? I'm not saying your knees are any more knobbly than other people's knees. What I mean is they're an outpost, aren't they a nobilly knee? Yeah, but I'm wearing three quarter length, in winter. No. No, I'm not. Thank God for that. Thank God for well say I like fucking kid. Do you know what sue me? It's just what I like. Anyway this naughty kid right when that the girls are playing that game with the other boy he kept like ruining the game by jumping on the inflatable where anyway he was being quite naughty and then he was pushing the inflatable over like my kid's head so

so first we jumped on the things it's like pushing my daughter and she stayed still going, she went, no, don't push me. Ah, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Then he kept pushing her and she went no and then she gave him a push back. Yeah. Which I thought was fine. Where are his parents at this point? Because I'm one of them, don't it first, if you get it, tell a tell, tell, tell, tell, tell, tell, tell, tell, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their. back. My mate who's dad is I would say intimidating. Yeah. When he was at school his dad instructed him to go in and you've just got to go in and punch the

bully. There's a lot to be said about that. We were told don't hit them first but if they hit you hit them back and make sure you get the last one in and also a cica one on the floor to keep him down. I've never hit anyone. I've never to be. the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the' their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. theeeeeeeeeeeat. theeat. theeea. theeea' theea' theea' theea' thee. the. I've never hit anyone. You've never hit anyone? I've never hit anyone, ever. Have you ever been hit? I don't think so. I'm just, it's just not the world I'm moving. There was no one at your school to have a fight with, was it? I had a few fights at primary school. But by the time I got to just sort of just take it. Yeah. Just have that sandwich not a problem. Just leave. He was up

prison by the end. One kid turned up to chase another kid on the back of a dirt bike and chased him through the field swinging a fucking chain. What? What? Yeah. Fucking out of their f-like. Yeah. Yeah. Fucking. I want like mad maxed. they're. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. they. they. they. they. they. they. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. their. their. their. their. their. their. It's. It's. It's. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. as an adult. Let's not talk about that. As an adult, it's probably about 17. Anyway, I don't tell her to hit back, but if you feel in danger and they won't stop hitting you, then defend yourself, I'd say. But if they hit you, go and tell someone don't hit back. But our instructions were to hit back. Anyway, she was in the paw and he pushed it away, like an inflate. to. And she. And she. And she. And she. And, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, and then, and then, to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to hit, to hit to him. to hit to him. to him. to him. their. their. their. their. their. to him him him him him him him him him him him him him him him him. to him him. to him. to him. to him. to him. to him. to him. But, I. But, I. But, I. But, I. But, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, I. And, to. And, if. And, if. And, like, if. And, like, like, if. And, like, like, if. And, like, like, if. And, like, if. And, like, if. And, if. And, if. And, if she pushed away the second time and then just pushed it really hard not at him but away and just walked up to him and went not cool. Oh yes I get and I was sat there watching it from the lounge because you've got let them sort out of themselves you can't be that person that jumps in she went not cool. No cool you got a David Attenborough haven't you? Yeah exactly I like it's quite a good thing to say not to say to say to say to say to say to say to say the to say the the the to the to the the the the to the to the the the that that's a the the that's a that's that's that's that's that that's that that that that that the that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that the the the the the the the the th I I I the the the the the the the the the they. they. they. the the they. I the the the they. the the. the thee. I that's that's quite a good thing to say, not call. Not cool. It's quite a good way to defuse the situation. And she took the cigarette out of his mouth and trod it into the floor as well didn't she and said

that is not cool either. Yeah, and then bogwashed him like Ian Bill and Phil Mitchell. The other thing as well, so the people that the people that the message message message message message message the the the the people the message that that the that that the that that the people that the the the that the the that the that the message that that the people that the message message message message message message message message message message message that that that that that that that the people the people that that that that that that that that the people people people the people the people the people the people the people the people the people the people the people the people the people the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th keep keep keep keep keep keep keep keep the the the thea thea. that that that that that that that thea. thea. This is so good. This is so funny. It cracked me up. Thank you for that, obviously. Yeah. You're doing a great job, but you've provided some hilarious conversation for us this week. Well, yeah, when I've actually said my daughter's name, it's really helpful, because we like to sniping that out. Because I want to give them some privacy as the privacy privacy privacy privacy privacy privacy privacy privacy privacy to my my my my my my my my my my my my to my their to to to their to to to to their to to to her as Bridget Jones but that was a joke because we were talking about the way she was doing something like a divorcee

like sort of single adult woman so I prefer to her as Bridget I want to confirm my daughter's name is not Bridget Jones Beckett which I think no B.J. B.B.J. here she comes. So yeah thank you but yeah Bridget Jones was a joke that isn't my daughter's name just to confirm. Oh BJ here she comes. So yeah thank you but yeah Bridget Jones was a joke that isn't my daughter's name just to confirm. Yes fair enough. But yeah so that was sort of the holiday update. That was a great holiday. Yeah brilliant had a great time but.

And we've covered a lot of hot topics. Hot topics, yeah fighting. Fighting. Competitiveness. Yes, game playing. Dominic Sandbrook. These are all big topics. If you wear three quarter-length trousers, you are a pedophile. Where the calves get cold. Do calves get cold? Calfs don't get cold. Because do you know what? You never see footballers, they'll go gloves and they'll go long sleeves, but they'll always keep the legs out. Yeah, exactly. And greelish, doesn't it? Gailish. Gailies. And goal. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. their. their. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. t. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. times wear tax suit trousers. Very rarely these days but yeah. Very rarely these days. I love love a pair of shorts. I do wear those some sort of like leggingsy things when I play father side that's more to stop the burn if you fall over though. Oh okay here you go here. So we end with my stressful morning Rob. Yeah let's do your stressful morning. Small. Oh I've got something for next week. Go on. Do you know what because because because because because because because because because because because I I I I I I to to to to to the way. Because. Because I I to to the way. Because. the way. the way. to the way. the way. to the way. to the way. to the way. the way. the way. the way. the way. the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to stop. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm the to. I'm to. I'm to. t. t. t. try. t. t. te. the. the. I. the. I'm. the. the. the the the to. I'm more. I in September, I'm going to hold back a picture I've got of Rose buying too many strawberries. Okay, save the gold. Let's not further that up. Remember,

Michael Rob, put a pin in that because I'll forget. Rose bought too many strawberries. Okay, loads of strawberries. That's what we've got to do. Yeah. Okay. So after my morning. Yeah. I then wrote down everything I'd done that morning. Because I was like th. Ro. Ro. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to th. th. to to to to to to to to to to the the the to the to the to to the the to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I. I. I. I. th. I. I. I'm. I'm to. I'm to. I'm to. to. to. I. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. I. to. to. I. I. I. to. to. to. then wrote down everything I'd done that morning, because I was like, I just need to, then I can read through it. Busy morning? Yeah. Oh Michael, while Josh is doing this, can you send the small business shoutouts, please? So we can do that. I don't think I've got them here.

Okay now, no, no, I'm not, the attention to me, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, I.. Well, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I, I'm. I, I, I, I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm just, I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I, I, I, I. I, I. I. I. I, I. I. I. I, I. I, I, I. I, I, I'm. I'm. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th no, it's fucking fine. You read the small business, mate. No, no, no, just getting... Sorry, sorry, Josh. Do you want some ASMR? Should I bang my wedding ring with a hammer? I can't hear any of this. I can't, that's great. That's just me knocking on my balker. Why have you got a hammer? Well the only way I can get off these days is just before I ejaculate I hammer my balls.

Got to do what you've got to do, John? Yeah, fair enough. In your office, quite a weird place, but fair enough. No, this was used to hammering some nails and things to hang my football shuts up for soundproofing. Yeah, of course. Still a fucking mess this place. I got sort it out in September. Come on, Josh, sorry, go on. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. the th. the th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. thi. thi. the the th. th. their. th. their. their. their. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah. th. Yeah. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. the. the. the. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. the. the. the. 7.30, get up. Oh, lying. Yeah, well, we're on those times. Despite some people, some people thinking we should drop the nap, we get up at 7.30. Just say, just say, it might get more of an easer. Just dumb people. No, not naming names. Not naming names.

First thing I have to do, take the curtains out into the street. Why? We've got new curtains and we wanted to get rid of our velvet curtains and we were just going to leave them in the street for people to take. Right, okay. So to refold the curtains, take them out in the street. The people take the curtains? They did, yeah. they? Yep. Four velvet curtains. their velvet curtains. We've had them for seven or eight years. Yeah, no I don't know, I don't know what velvet curtains sounds like a, sounds like a euphemism. Yeah, well, she gave me a velvet curtain last night. Never read one before. What a woman. Did that? Realized I needed to cancel my gym for the next day before 10 a.m. Because you had to give 24 hours notice, but didn't go Had to unbox the things in the hall, but I got sent a box of, I'm not going to say it because they said, I just sent me four energy drinks, this company. Yeah. They someone got my email in address, I don't know. They sent me four energy drinks and they said,

in the email, when you put this on your social media, do hashtag it. I'm like, Fuck off. Straight on the wall. to thiii. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tho. tho' thi. thi. that' that' tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. They's th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. the. the. the. the. th Tell you that now. Ain't coins worth a drink for a advert. Yeah. Let's promote the rival brand to teach them a lesson. Okay, so a thumbs up to the guys at Slim Fast. Let's put it that way. Yeah? Yeah. Okay.

Um, make breakfast for the kids. Yeah, yeah, Rose had to go out and get her coffee. Yeah. Why's Rose going out to get her coffee? What? Does she go out every morning for a coffee? Yeah. Really? She don't just make one indoors? Yeah, she likes the one from the shop just down the road. No, and then you're in with the kids? That's her thing. That's her thing. Do you want my thing to sleep until nine? Well, that's also Rose's thing. Yeah. Oh, oh!

She's gonna love that! He's on fire! He's on fire today! Right, then I had to order some bamboo. What for? Little, the garden? Yeah, no, we're growing tomatoes. Sure. And they've got too tall and I bought some bamboo and it was six inches tall, Rob. And it wasn't tall enough. So then I had to order some bigger bamboo. Yep. And then I went on to Amazon and then my password didn't work

for some reason so I had to re-log into Amazon. Then I had to make 40 grams of porridge for my kids rather than 60. Yeah, and then it turned out that's the right and how porridge. So I've been making too much porridge for all this time. Oh sure. Unloaded the dishwasher. Yeah. Yeah. And I put the hose outside. I had to go and do that. Then I've got to make myself, so this is about half eight by now. Josh I feel like this is a you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you. So th. So th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm that I'm. I'm. I'm. So that's. So that's. So that's. So that's. So that's. So that. So that. So that. So that. So that. So that. So that. So that. So that. So I that. So I that. So I that. So I that. So I'm. So I'm. So I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm th. I'm. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm the listener for Rose. No I'm doing it I'm doing because... Do you not feel appreciated? I know I do feel appreciated. Then I got to have a cup of tea. Lovely, well done. Yeah. And then new wolf, don't know what that means. Oh yeah, and then my daughter got sent a stuffed wolf, and my son also wanted the stuffed wolf like a toy. So my wife ordered a new one so they can't. the, do it it. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do not th. Do not th. Do not their their their th. Do th. Do not their their their not their not their not th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do, I th. Do, I th. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do, I. Do, I. Do, I. Do, I. Do, I. Do, I. Do, I th. Do, I th. Do, I th. Do, I the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the. Do the like a toy. So my wife ordered a new one so they could have one each. And then they argued over who got the new one and who got the old one. Absolutely perfect.

Yeah. A problem solved and a problem started there. Yeah. And then when I went on Amazon earlier to do the bamboo, I realized that they'd never sent me a thing I'd ordered about a month before and I looked and it was lost in transit and it said it's been lost. You can apply to get your money back and I was like, that's a win. Yeah but they hadn't told me I'd just forgotten I'd ordered it. Right, that's sneaky. So then I had to go on to Amazon at this point. That's a good one actually. Check your lost in transits and Amazon get a bit of money back. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's th. That's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. th. th. th. Yeah, yeah. What was it by the way? Double Indy Dilder? I know it was just a toy thing for the kids. Some three quarter-lens trousers. Rob. Then I went out.

Rose was like it'll be in the wood shed thing. The bike shed we've got outside and I was like at the front yeah. No it's not in the bike shed. And so I was like no it won't be in there because I put a padlock on there because we started keeping my daughter's bike in there. Right, okay. And Rose said no it's still opens and I went outside Rob. Yeah. And I had just done this. This is fucking mental. For the last two weeks, I'd gone out, put my daughter's bike in there, bought a new padlocked from Amazon, and

then padlocked it on and gone, well that'll sort it. Have you seen the... I just attached it. Oh, you said it's... I've sent the photo to you. I think I know what you've done already. He just padlocked it on to one side. I haven't padlocked anything attached, I just attached a padlocked.

That's that job done. Another job sold for your drink. How thick am I? I've just attached it to one bit. So when you bring the bar down, this is what it looks like. So that's the bar I'm men who attach it to. Right. All right. So it's men who attach those two things. I've just attached it. I've just that it. That it. I that. I've it. I've it. I've it. I've it. I've that. I've that. I've that. That that. That that. I've just that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that's that's that's that's that's the that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the touched touched touched touched touched tied. I've just just just just tied. I've just tied. I've just tied. I've tied. I've tied. I've just just just tied. I that's the bar on men who attach it to. Right, alright. So it's men who attached those two things. I just attached it. I don't even think that padlock will fit that, will it? No, it did, it did actually.

Oh, okay, okay. Sorry. I thought that, no, no. So I had to carry on with my Amazon chat. I had to get my daughter dressed, then I had to sort out of the parking for some people that were delivering some garden furniture. Oh God, that is horrible job. Yeah. We used to have that when we lived in Zone 3, we had to do parking permanently. It's a nightmare, yeah? Yeah, yeah, th. Yeah, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, I I I I th. So, I thi, I thi, I thi, I that, I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their, I had their, I had their, I had their, I had th. I to to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get their, I I I I, I I their, I, I their, I their, I their, I their, I their, I their, I their, I thathea, I thathea, I thathea, I thateateateat, so sort sort thateat, so sort thateat, so sort sort that, sort that, so sort thateat, soa. I had thateat, I had that,, then I go upstairs to meditate, which I need. Oh, I've got that wrong actually, Rob. I go upstairs to meditate, sit down and then Rose shouts at me. We need to sort out of the parking for the people that are delivering the furniture.

Lovely, back now, mid-meditate. And then I realized that I, is parking, something up, the parking in to the Hackney Council website. No, it's a one-person job and it's your job. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I forget I'm still in this middle of this chat with Amazon, so I go back into that chat with Amazon. Yeah, and then I look at my phone, it's 10-04. I haven't fucking canceled the gym session. Yep, you've missed that now and then I go and drop my daughter to a play scheme and I get caught in traffic

and that was my morning. Was it a nice morning? It was just the summer holidays. Did you need to do all those little admin jobs before 10 though? Could you not have done? Yeah because I was working. Oh right then you had to go straight into a right okay. Yeah. You're looking forward to September and start of the school term? Yeah though I don't see th. I I I th. I don't see th. I don't see th. I don't see th. I don't see that I don't see that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that that that that that that that that that that that that's that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. th. th. I th. I thi. I thi. I they. I th. I they. I they. I th. I the. I thi. I thi. I that's that's that's that's that's that's th September and start the school term? Yeah, though I don't see, when I was thinking about that, I was like, well I don't see how that would be different if she was in school. But yeah. Yeah, she would have dropped her off slightly earlier. But I mean, what I'm going to say those, Josh, like it or not, like it or not, your youngest child's napping will end. I just don't think it will. I will. I will. I will. I will. I will. I th. I th. I th. I th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. I th. I thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, like thi, like thi, like thi, like thi, like thi, like thi, like thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. theeeeea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thooooooooooooooooooooo. Yeah, I th.two and a half out. I just don't think it will. It will, ages two. He just, he loves napping. It will end.

And then what'll happen is, you'll be trying to work and then Rose be downstairs with a toddler for two and a half hours. Should we do the small business shout out? Let's do is that birds? Just birds? Well, no, actually it's everything now. What's your RSPA then? That's more for like cruelty to animals, isn't it? What's PB then?

It's like nature reserves and stuff. Right, okay. Hi, Robin Josh, absolutely love your podcast and book. As new parents ourselves, we thou, how come come wea, we th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th their their we make this even harder and decided to start a business in lockdown called B and Bonnet alongside having our daughter Florence. It's locally sourced honey infused with Scotch bonnet chilies. Blimey O'Reilly. It's delicious on pizzas I bet it is grilled meats, veggies, cocktails, basically everything. We started in 2020 and are now stocked in restaurants, pop-ups and delis around the UK. You can buy it at www.Bbbbbbb.bottb.B.B.B.B.B.B.B.B.B.B.B.B.B.B.U.K. Okay, here we go. Hi Rob and Josh, this one is for the mums and mums to be, in brackets, sorry, dad's, brutal. I work for maternally fit, which is run by the wonderful Helen.

We have a small team of physiotherapies who run exercise classes across London and sorry for pregnancy and beyond. We aim to empower and educate women women on exercising safely during and after pregnancy, including how to do those all-important pelvic floor exercises. We want women to keep fit and strong for labor and motherhood and meet our other fabulous women along the way. Our classes are individually tailored so are suitable for everyone including those who have never exercised. You can find us on our website info at maternally fit.coat.

For a free trial class. Thank you. Love the podcast Sophie. So that's Surrey and London for maternally fit. Josh I'll see you next time. It's been a joy. Loved it. See you next time.

Look forward to it. Cheers. Bye. Hello, I'm Charles Brandreth. What's the very first thing you remember? That's the question. I'll be asking my famous and fascinating guests in Rosebud. My new podcast about first memories and first experiences. My first memory is handing my Auntie Muriel a piece of turd. Other guests include Dame Judy Dench, Allison Hammond and Rory Stewart. Download and listen wherever you get your podcasts.

Pst. It's me, Alan. There's no place like London's Hackney Empire this September, or so I'm told. With shows from three of the UK's top comedians. Join team captain of 8 out of 10 Catsdars Countdown John Richardson, recent I'm a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here star Sean Walsh, and me Alan Carr. We're all visiting Hackney Empire this September with our critically acclaimed tour shows. Ooh la da da. Tickets available from Hackney Empire.co. UK. See there my loves!