Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S7 EP45: Scott Bennett (The Return)

Episode Date: December 26, 2023

Joining us this episode to discuss the highs and lows of parenting (and life) is the brilliant comedian - Scott Bennett. You can listen to Scott's podcast 'Brew with the Bennett's' wherever you get your podcasts. And find date and ticket info for his new tour at scottbennettcomedy.co.uk Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Please leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xx If you want to get in touch with the show here's how: EMAIL: [e-mail] INSTAGRAM: @parentinghell MAILING LIST: parentinghellpodcast.mailchimpsites.com  A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I'm going back to university for zero dollar delivery fee, up to 5% off orders and 5% Uber cash back on rides. Not whatever you think University is for. Get Uber won for students. With deals this good, everyone wants to be a student. Join for just $4.99 a month. Savings may 3, eligibility and member terms apply. Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. Welcome to Parent, Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a to to to to to to thiiiiiiii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. I. I'm, thi. I'm, thi. I'm, thi. I'm, thi. I'm, thi. I'm, thi. I's, thi. I. I's, thi. thi. thi. I. I's, thi. I's, thi. I's. I's. I's. I'm, th. I's. I's. I's. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooe. th. which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to

be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So, to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern-day parenting, each week we're chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're not coping. And we'll also be hearing from you the list, tips, and their, their, their, their, and their, their, and their, and their, and their, their, and their, and their, their, and their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, and, and, and, and their, and, their, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and................. And. And. And. And. And. And. And, the's. And, the's. We's. We's. t t t togu. t to''''a's. to'a. to'a. to. to. to. to. the's. the's. the's. the's. the's. tips, advice and of course, tales of parenting woe. Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times when none of us know what we're doing. Hello, you're listening to Parenting Hell with Griffith, can you say Rob Beckett? Good boy. And can you say Josh Woodacom? Amazing, thank you.

Hello. There we go. What a low barometer for Amazin that parent. This is my son Griff, great name. Come on Griff. Big Daddy Griff. Yeah. Hello you slags. This is my son Griff, doing it the intro. The first clip is him doing it over a year ago when he was about 18 months.

Oh, the second clip. we've got a second clip, him doing it today. Griff squared. This is his a year later. Griff, can you say Rob Beckett? Robbacett. Good boy and can you say Josh Whittakum? Very good. Well done. Marked improvement. Also as well. She gave that of well, she was amazing him off., th. th. th. th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to him to to to him to him to him to him to him, to him, to him, to him. to him, to him. to him. to him. Gri, to him. Gr him. Gr him. Gre, to him. Gr him. Gr him. Gr him. Gring. Gring, to him. Gring, to him. Gring to him to him to him to him to him to him th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to him doing to to to to to to him doing to him doing to him doing to him doing to him doing to him doing to him doing to him doing to him doing to him doinged Improvement. Also as well. Yeah, she gave that

of well done. She was amazing him off a year ago and it was rubbish. Yeah, well there go. That's the encouragement for you. Interested to see if Rob can guess where we're from. Oh God, that's I think somewhere up north I'm going to say Manchester. Very close. Oh, pop star? Stoke. Yes, correct. Stoke on Trent, not bad. The problem is everyone does their telephone voice when they speak to their kids. Yeah, of course. Have you watched the Robbie Williams Doc, Rob?

Yeah, it makes sense why he was in his vest and pants and in a bed when he did our show. Yep. I loved it. I loved it. I love him. I feel sorry for him. He was thrust into the limelight at a very young age. Fucking out. I feel sorry for him and I feel sorry for him. And I feel like he still cares too much about what people think. Yeah. Just don't worry, mate. It just doesn't matter. If you watch the Ronnie O Sullivan one? Do you try to? the Ronio Sullivan one? Oh, that is amazing. the documentary. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. I. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thi. thi. the. I That is amazing. It's so good. He's such a legend. That bit where it's the end of that snooker match and he hugs his opponent and he's Mike Tart. And he just unleashes how he actually feels it is heartbreaking.

Oh my God, yeah. It's absolutely heartbreaking that he can put that much pressure on himself. It's an amazing insight into how messed up really successful people are. Yeah, and you sort of automatic assume somebody who's naturally talented but also works hard and really cares and puts those effort in and he's a genius of what he does. He's the greatest ever. Ah, imagine being that talented or with that successful, but like, a lot of the time, people that make it to that elite level aren't wired up right because they can't just let it be they have to keep going and have to be the best and it's exhausted. When you see the Michael Jordan documentary he's an absolute nutcase in they like he's so yeah totally

you cannot lose but yeah both amazing documentaries yeah really thoroughly enjoyed them thoroughly enjoyed them thoroughly enjoyed them little Netflix there they're all Netflix of all documentaries so I like Hoover? Yes or Tano I. Yeah do some correspondence Josh we've got quite a few to get through. Yeah I do some correspondence. Irish driving test fails and laws? Absolutely. That sounds good didn't it. Hi you sexy beasts. After hearing your episode about driving test I had to write in and tell you about the ridiculous laws we have here in Ireland. Over here you that that that th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the thi, thi, thi, or tho, or to to to to to to to to tho, or tho, or tho, or tho, or tho, or th. Yes, or the, or the, or the, or the, or the, or the th. Yes, or th. Yes, or th. Yes, th. Yes, th. Yes, th. Yes, th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thrown, thrown, to, te, te, te, teuuu. thauu. thau. thauu. thau. thau and tell you about the ridiculous laws we have here in Ireland. Over here you start driving lessons and after about five you go and do your theory test. Yeah. Once you pass it you get your provisional license which lasts for about five

years. When that expires you update it to your second provisional and then third provisional. You can drive here with a provisional license without having a fully qualified drive with you and continue to do this until your third provisional license expires which is about 15 years. No. Then you really do have to go and get a full license. If you take your test while you have a provisional license and fail you can continue to drive. You can literally drive to the test and drive home again. So basically you do five lessons and pass a theory. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the the their their their their their thi. their their thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. thi. thi. thito drive home again. So basically you do five lessons and pass a theory. Yeah. That means you get your provisional, which means you can just do as much driving as you want, but between then and the next 15 years you have to pass a test. But if you fail it doesn't matter, but after that 15 years, yeah, I think if you can't drive, you've done the damage by them. Yeah, I think exactly. Also about 40 years ago there was a backlog of people waiting to take their test that the government

issued anyone who failed their test once a full license in order to relieve their backlog. No. It's absolutely bullets in, isn't it? They were never made to take their test and had to no problem renewing their licenses. So there's a generation of people driving around who've never passed their tests. That is incredible. Well, I'd say though, the truth is, and a lot of people say it, go, you only learn to drive once you've passed your test. Yeah. That's when you actually learn how to drive. Because you don't do motway.

That's what's mental. You can't go to pass the backlog clear the backlog. Yeah, John a toilet stage right tip Hi, lads hearing Josh talk about stage right the urinals urinals urinals for a couple of weeks A couple of weeks ago I had to write in I had this a number of years and recently worked out a way to get to the tai is to name the starting 11 of your football team for the coming week. So as a full and thum fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan th f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f f the the the th the th. I I I I th. I will the the the the the the the the th. I I will the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to toa. I toe. I will. I will. I will. I will. I will. I will. I will. I will. I will. I will. I will. I will in my head, Leno, Leno, Leno, Tete, Riem, I'm fucking hell, I'd never heard of any of these. And by Harry Wilson, I'm pissing like a shy horse. If you needed to go into the subs bench, and then you will have to bring on as many as well,

I think it must take your mind of other people. Works every time for me now. Game change, I hope it works Matt. The problem is they've got a player called Willie Ann. Right, is he still playing football, William? Yeah, it will take you straight back to the Pierce. Yeah, if you're trying to take your mind off it and you go, you've got something called Willie. Yes. Leno, it's a burnt Leno, he's a German goalkeeper. Oh didn't he play for Arsenal? Yes, you did. Hi Rog and Josh, after listening to your episode with Scarlet Moffat and you discussed about nicknames your parents used to give you as a kid I thought I'd share mine.

My parents used to call me trowl face trown? Trowl like a garden trowl. Yes I had a pointy chin and a face shaped like a garden trowl. Oh that's not okay is it. They also called me baldy locks for a long time as I remain bald for many years after being born. I absolutely love the pod and thank you for constantly providing all the laughs it has genuinely helped me through the past few years. I'm not surprised. Trow face as I need to to the the point a a the point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point a point. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. You th. th. th. th. th. th. th. t. t. t. t. tou. te. te. tr. trown. tou. te. tri. tow. tow. tow. tow. tow. tow. te. has genuinely helped me through the past few years. I'm not surprised. Trow Face, sorry, Neve from North Wales. You're balding, you got a pointy face. We're going to call you baldy locks and trow face. Yeah. Baldy locks is fine for a baby when they're little and they don't know what's going on but an actual child or trout is it. Yeah that isn't fair is it? Character building is a very overrated term isn't it? Yeah, an email from Santa, this sounds good. Hi, Robert Josh, a sneaky parenting tip for you.

My nearly six-year-old was really playing up this afternoon, so my husband and I set up an email address from Santa at Gmail. that's been taken. My nine-year-old read it out to the younger one and so far has worked. See below thanks the message. Dear, the message, the message, the message, th. tho, tho, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, tho, tho, tho, tho, that, thi, is thi, is, is tho, is, is, is, is, tho, tho, tho, tho, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. t, t, t, tha, th. I, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, is, is thi, is thi, is thin, is thin, is thin, is thin, is thin, is thin, is thin, to thin, too''''''''n'a. too'a'n'a'n'a'a'a'a'n'a'a'n'n'a, tha. And, tha. See below thanks the message. Dear Mummy Rhodes, I wanted to send you a quick message before it is too late. I'm concerned about Finley's behavior. Finley is currently on my naughty list. If his behavior doesn't improve, then this will stay. I know he can be good boy and make it back onto the good list. Best wishes Santa with a Santa with a Santa with a kiss. Oh God, I don't know about that. That's hard. That's that. I that. that th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to to to to thi thi thi th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thin thin thin thin thin thin thin thin. thin. thin. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thin. thin. thinn. thin. thin. th that is hardcore it but if it works. That is intense isn't it? Fuck it out. I just feel like that it's almost like a nuclear button you just don't want to press. It's from a non. So they're clearly not so sure about what they've done. They know what they've done is over their line. They know they're stepping on a line whether they're going over it or not. You can judge away. Do you want one more? Do one more, come on. We haven't had a fucking Boomer. Sorry, we haven't had a bloody Boomer. There was no need to swear, was there? I know if I quite like it that you redid it. Yeah. Hi, Rob and Josh.

Who's telling you off for swearing? My own conscience. After listening to a recent episode, I had to email my grandpa's parenting hell boomer story. My grandpa had parked in the road and left my mom ate an uncle ten in the car while he dropped something off at a friend's house. When he came out of the house the car was gone. Here's what had happened. He had forgotten to put the handbrake on and the car was parked on a hill. It rolled forwards down the hill. My mom and uncle didn't know how to stop. So my uncle climbed into the front and did his best to steer. Fuck it out! Now I'm swearing. The car then approached a tea junction.

So my mom shouted from my uncle to steer left, up the hill to make the car slow down. As he did this, luckily passengers by, ran over and pulled up the handbreak. When my grandpa the hill to make the car slow down. As he did this, luckily passengers by, ran over and pulled up the handbrake. When my grandpa found the car and the kids, his one instruction was don't tell your mom, they obviously didn't listen. Imagine seeing that, a car driving down a hill with a ten of an eight-year-old, the ten driving the car. Also, they remember everything, kids. When they get to that age age, to to to to their, to their, to their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, too, their, too, too, too, too, their, their, their, too, their. I. I. I. I. I. I was, their, their, their, their, their, their. I. Gran, grandpa, grandpa, grandpa, grandpa, their. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm, gra. I'm, gra, gra, gra, gra. I'm, grua. I'ma. I'ma.a.a.a. Gran.a. Gran.a.a. Gran.a. Gran. Gramp. Gramp. Gramp. I'ma. Gramp. Gramp. Gramp. I'ma. Gras. remember everything kids. Yeah. When they get to that age as well, they they know they can use it as currency. So I was taking my daughters to the harvester. I was meeting their cousin, right? Oh, they said don't tell your mom I'm taking you to the harvest. They're going. They're being quite naughty. They're not getting, a little plastic ball of a toy in okay they love it so we always get them when we go harvest it and have you got any

change for that I went at the moment you're not getting one you're both you both to you to be you and your sister are not you're not to the toys you're lucky you're even going to harvest to and they and I and they and they and they and they and they and they and they and they they and they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they they're they're they they they they they they they they they they they they they one or not. And they went, you don't care about her, your own niece. I can't believe you said you don't care about it. I went, no, no, no, I said I don't care whether she gets a toy or not, because it doesn't matter to me if she's good or not. That's not my responsibility. You're not being good to you. So I don't care about your knees. And I was like, you, I know what you're up to, you pair of fucking twats.

And then I was in there at dinner. And then my sister-in-law was there with the kids. And then my youngest went, Daddy said he doesn't care about her. And I was like, no, you know what I meant. I said I don't care about the throw me under the bus. They knew what they're doing. Oh, Robbastards. On today's show, very special guests, it's a returnee, Josh, a returnee because the last time he was on, Scott Bennett told us a funny

but also heart-wrenching an insane story about his daughter who had a rare illness and it involved Wayne Rooney, private jets, Germany, operations, hospitals, the baby becoming hairy. If you've not listened to Scott Bennett's first appearance, go back. He's an amazing story. However, you've gotten back this time for more of a traditional parent-in-hell chat and catch-up about his kids that don't involve a 50-minute story. No. And it's a banger. It's so funny. It's so good. This is the return of Scott Bennett with less heart wrench, more lulls. Though he does talk about the Arctic Monkeys. Yes which for some people that's a painful subject. Welcome at Scott. Welcome at Scott. Welcome back.

Welcome back. Pleasure to have you back. Parenting Hill Royalty. Yeah Perry and Hell. Only a few have returned Scott, but thanks for coming back. Oh my God, I'm honored. No one's ever done three. Has anyone ever done three? Well, let's see how this goes. Maybe we could just record a third straight off the back of it, is that good? Yeah. I mean, the last one was more of a serious one, so you, so you, so you, so you, so you, so you, so you, so you, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so you, so you, so you, so you, so you, so you, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to, to, to, to, to, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to Scott's first one, go back and listen to that, that was

you talking about your daughter's sort of health journey. Yeah. Well, she had a very rare disease which ended up when you were in a private jet to Germany. And then back in hospital meeting Wayne Rooney and yeah it was a bit braggy for my tastes, but you know as as stories go there was a lot humble brags flying around. Yeah, but names being dropped clang, Michael Carrick, Viditch, Klang. So this one's more of a general chat about being a parent as opposed to a... Could you just recap us on that story from the start to end please? It was I mean the one thing about is I listened back to it and I thought that is punching. At one point my mom

and dad listened to it and my mom went, are you really a comedian? Because that was one of the bleakest hours I've ever had to endure. I thought it was fascinating. Obviously it was fascinating it was great. It's semi-serious topic but I found the actual story and you're very funny at telling it at the same time to be fair. Did it peak your tour sales in the way you were hoping? Yeah, but I've ended up touring walking centres, which... Urgent care.

I wasn't on the plan, do you know? It's a very strange that every time, you know, I, I th and I th and I thia, I thia, I thia, I thia, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's a very strange, it's a very strange, I'm, it's a very strange, I'm, I'm, it's a very strange, I'm, I'm, it's a very, it's a very, it's a very, it's a very, it's a very, every time, you know, I've got to time in my punchlines with the beeps of ventilators. No, it was wonderful. The response, just to be serious, has been bigger than anything I've ever done before. So that's down to you guys, and I think, yeah, it was brilliant. It's really, if there's any heroes in the story, it's me and Rob. Absolutely. Yeah, forget the doctors. I mean, it was like Noel Edmonds at Christmas or something. I miss that guy wandering around hospitals with his beard. I miss him. So to recap, how old are your kids now? Scott, what are we looking down

the barrel at? We're looking at 13 and 7. Okay. Which one's the one who's been on a private jet? The 13 year old. It's the one who's in the west wing of the house now. Only speaks to us through a PA. Yeah, so it's 13 and 7 and yeah it's getting quite interesting actually. Is it? Yeah. Are they daughters, did you say? Both daughters? Yeah. I mean,-year-old at the moment is, and I don't know if this is the same for you, they're exhausted at the moment. They're tired, there's no sunlight. Yeah, they're miserable, can't get him out of bed. Getting my daughter to school this morning, the seven-year- of, I don't want to do anything. There was one point, she says, I don't want to do any of this. So is that, what is that? I think it's a long term in it?

I think apparently it's a longer term. So that's the first step of teenager? Well, no, the seven-year-old is just on a massive go-slows. But I mean is that her going from the excitement of being five? The novelties wearing off of school and then also as they get to seven and eight, it isn't just, oh let's play or learn how to read and write, it's like now let's do some work, let's do some proper maths, let's do some proper, let's do some proper, let's do some proper, let's do some proper, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, the proper, the proper, the proper, the proper, the proper, the proper, the proper, th. th. thops, their, their, thops, the proper, their, their, their so their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thops, thops, thoprue, thoprue, thoproprue, thoprue, thoproprape, their thoprape, their soo.. be. It's not proper I could fucking nail all those tums. Well I'm struggling with my daughter's homework at the moment genuinely. It's when you have to Google it you think oh how thick am I.

Also I realize I don't write in full sentences so I could help them with spellings because I'd look on my I know the information, I can communicate it. However, to get a good grade and pass an exam in that way that a school needs information. You're verbal. Yeah, that way for that school to receive information written down, I'm done now. I'd love to see you doing the exam like elf on a little chair. I think I should it with great TV show if Rob Beckett tries to do education from year three. Yeah I need some extra time. I would. It's mental. I don't understand when she went you're all right in full sentences but I don't really ever need to. Yeah it is and obviously you don't need to spell anymore. No one no phone does it also tho. the phone the phone the phone th you th you th you th you th you th you th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thus. thus. thus. thus. thus. thus. tho. tho. th. th. th. to th. to to thi. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I I th. I I I I I I I I th. I I I I th. I I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi. I thi. I the. I the. I the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm tho. I'm to to to to to to to to the. I need the. I need the. I need the. I. Also, she's telling these quick sums, Scott, where like, she can do it as quick as I can do it in a calculator.

Oh my word. Oh my word. Well, it's big subtraction. They have these little sayings, like, if more at the top, the less at the bottom. And I'm like, what 10 years Rob will be doing. If there's more at the top, there's less at the bottom. Welcome to Borrow the 10 with Robbock.

And what have he said? There's more at the top, there's less at the bottom. Let's go. She's also getting a little attitude though, because this man has laughed the other day. Because me and Jemma, I don't th the same I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I don't the same, I don't the same, I don't the same, I don't the same, I don't the same the same the same the same the same the same the same their, I their, I their, I don't their, I don't their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th. W. W. W. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. th. th. to. to. their. to. to. W. W. When you can't obviously shout at them or swear at them, but when she was driving us to the edge, we were in the bedroom putting some clothes away and Jemma came in and she does the silent swearing like, like, she'll go in and go, oh yeah, and then I'll say, I said to her,

it's just a face! They can hear the hearing so good. It's like bat hearing. It's like through floorboards. It's unbelievable. So this week they've had the roles for the school play. Oh right. She didn't get one and it's like you forget that brutal competitiveness at school. Oh my god. And they sat them all down and announced it.

Sorry, is the seven or 13? Seven year olds. What? They normally get a line, don't they, or something? She didn't get a line, so she's like, I'm in the dance bit, but I was like, oh that's brutal. that's brutal. You're not even a tree. It's like the boot camp. You shouldn't have shouldn't have said, the school, their, their, their, Scott, Scott, Scott, Scott, Scott, Scott, Scott, Scott, Scott, Scott, Scott, their, their, th, th, th, th, th, th, there, mate. Lava that. You're not even a tree. What's that happen there?

When they get lines in the plays and they have to practice them at home, I don't know if you've had this yet, Josh, or you must have in the past Scott. We're like, they have a line. And sometimes I feel like, don't want to be that weird parent. Because they'd go that isn't a full sentence. Yeah yeah yeah but did it get a fucking laugh yet it did. I've sat through this shit for four years now that's laughing it up but my daughter's doing it got a line where she

my daughter does his weird impression of a sheep which he goes like that like she'll just burst into that now and again it's a weird. So they've. they's. they've written it in? Well I haven't. You think it but you don't get involved in it because you don't want to be that person who's messing it about but she went the shepherd have the sheep and then she went I'm gonna say, with shepherd have the sheep and then go ah-ah-ah-ah-yeah. And I'm like, well you do what, you do what? you you you that. I because because because because because because because that. Because, because that. Because, because that. Because, because that that the the the the the person the person the person the person the person the person the person the person the person the person the person the person the person the person, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, the the the person, the person, the the person, the person, the person, the person, the person, the person, the person, the person, the the person, the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the person, the person,'t want to be that comedian who's forcing their kid into doing silly jokes in a play. So I was just like, well, you do what, and so I'm trying to just shut up and let them decide, essentially. Where's your money? Do you think, there's three options?

Yeah. It gets cut before the day by her or the teacher, she goes through with it and it rips it, or she bottles it at the moment of delivery, which is what I would have done as a child. I'd have gone all the way to delivery and then bottled it at the moment of delivery, I think. Well she's been saying I'll just do this when I practice at home. So she's been doing that eh, like as a sheet noise at at home, but then I imagine in all the rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal rehearsal the rehearsal the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the rehearsal should do it properly in the first performance she'll do it properly however there's a second performance the next morning yeah I reckon she might go fuck it yeah I'm gonna go full sheep yeah and which performance have you booked in to go to of I'm going to both well yeah because I was around so I thought why not they're just

after drop-off or just up before up. Oh, right, right. So I was doing both anyway, so I could. I love it if in the matinee, we'll be a bit more freewheeling in the matinee, you know. Yeah, you play around a bit. Just play around a bit. Feel the script. Do you know what I mean? Is she a bit upset than your daughter that? She was a little bit but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but. But. But. that. that. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. theeeeeeeeeeeeeee. We'll will will will will will will will will thi. thi. We'll will will will thi. the the thi. the thried to sort of, I said to her, I sat her down and said, listen, listen to your dad, I'm in a business where bitterness is par for the cause.

I've been here many times, you not getting this role of Mary was very similar to me when I got my sitcom rejected. Now sit down and let me tell you about some real hatred of the industry. She sort of then realized it was, you know, quite low level. They put you in th th th th th, th, to to to to to to to their their th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I thin, I thi, I, thi, I tho- tho- tho- tho------------s, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I. I. I. I. I, I, I, I. I, I. I, I, I. I, I. I, I, I, I, I, I, I. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I've thin. I've try. I've try. I've try. I've try. I've try. I've try. I've try. try. I've try. I've try. I've try. I've thin. I of the industry. She sort of then realized it was, you know, quite low levels. They put you in a dance troupe then as well, didn't they? Yeah. They said, we can't give you a sitcom, but do you want to dance in the background of someone else's? At the back of Mrs. Brown's boys, you can do the, yeah. That's what I said to it, that's just part of the d'aer, their, their, their, th, their, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thin, thr, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, their, their, their, their, we learned? Never go into showbiz, because it will stab you in the heart. Never go into something that you don't love doing, basically, because whatever you end up doing

is someone that's gonna make you bitter or reject you. But if you're enjoying it, then that's half, sort of half helps. Do you know what I think, I think as comedians, I as, I th is, I th is, I th is, th is, th is thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, though, thi, thi, that, thi, tho, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the their, their, their, their, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, the the is theat, thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, that, the I think, I think as comedians, we're, in terms of the showbiz worlds, I'd say ours is one of the better ones. Yes, because we've got a fucking skill. Most of them just fucking wander around doing TV presenting. Here he is, fucking granddad over here. No, but there's bloody turning on the today. We've got a fucking t. So if you learn your trade, you can go on the circuit, you can go and do different Christmas

gigs or whatever and always earn a living. However, if you are an actor, you are semi at the mercy of the industry completely where we have a little bit more we can go and create. I'd say they are skilled, but you're right. They are skilled, sorry. Their lives are in other people's thi. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. they are, they are, they are, they are, th. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah, th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. th. their. th. their. th. thi. their. th. th. th. th. their. th. it's horrific because also they have to see who gets the role they went for. It's clear as fucking daylight. Well, Scott's daughter's got a watch. Yeah. I got sat there and watch the other kid's. It's brutal. I think you're right. I think as well. It is seeing someone else, but then the other person would let them know that they didn't get it before the defen got chance to see it. because it. because it. the same their their their their their their. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th. I's, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th. th. th. th. th. the, the. And, the. And, the. And, thea. And, thea. And, thea. And, the. And, the. And, the. And, the. And, the other person would let them know that they didn't get it before the deafen got chance to see it, because they'd probably all be at the same audition. I always think like, there's six people walking around that were the six people that weren't

the friends. Oh yeah. That must be absolutely brutal. Anyway, Scott, 13-year-old, tell me about a 13 year old and boys going out, alcohol, phones, all these things that terrify me. Teenage years, because it's the start of it, isn't it? Yeah, well we've, luckily we've got... Boys or girls, I should say. Well, yeah, I mean, when you said alcohol and phones, well, is that referring to me, alcohol and phones? That's how I'm coping with the whole. Just sit there, the alcohol and alcohol, when their alcohol, when their alcohol, when their alcohol, when their alcohol, when their alcohol, when th th th th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. When th. When th. When thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. thi. thi. thi. I's, thi. I's, theea. I's, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, thea. thea. thi.'m coping with the whole. Just sit there, ignore the world, just get smashed on a Tuesday. Tick-Tock and Whiskey. Yeah, yeah, she's 30, she's very innocent

13. So we've had, we're in the era of sleepovers now, which is another, it's very surreal actually, because I sort of said to Gemma the other day, they had two of them over, but we never see him. So it's like, it, it, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, to Gemma the other day, she had two of them over, but we never see him. So it's like she's trafficked them. They're in a bedroom. We don't see them at any point. So they just provide for them. Do you just leave food outside the door? Live comes down like it's a negotiation and she comes, she gets a tray and just fills it with snacks and then Drifts off

Drips off I'm only in the air It's like it's like are we gonna see them at any point? Yeah, we're just chilling for a bit now and Just don't see it in there Just watching films are just chilling like it's a very strange. She's in that weird point as well where this was so funny because she knows. She needs money? She can't get a job the job. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's a the job. It's a the job. It's a the job. It's a the job. It's a the job. It's a the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a the th. It's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's their. It's is. It's is. It's is. It's a the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. It's is is is is is. It's is. It's is. It's is. It's is. It's is. It's is. It's. It's. It's. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a very th. It's a very th. It's a very th. It's a very th. It's a very th. It's a very th. It's a very th. It's a very th. It's a very th. It's a th. It as well where this was so funny because she knows she needs money she needs money she can't get a job because she's 13 it's not the 80s I mean we were all I worked at a flower market of 14 did you I was working in a pub at 14 yeah see see that was in there in that era no one gave a shit did they about elf and safety 40 quid a day picked up at 4 a.m back home at 2 p. the 40 quid a day how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how how you they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they th a they th. I th. I was th. I was th. I th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was in a th. I was in th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. th. th. thi. th. th. I th. I th. I th a day picked up at 4 a.m. back home at 2pm. Lovely. Yeah, 40 quid a day.

How are you getting home? I'm walking down a dual carriageway. Okay, see in the morning. No one, no one cared, did they? But yeah, going back to live. So she said to me the other daythen she says oh what can I I need money and I said Right she says well I could do babysitting I said that's a really good idea that I said who for she says How about for you and mommy and I was like so you're gonna babysit your sister? Yeah who lives in the same house

You live in yeah and will pay you and I was like mate that's not that's the lowest level effort you could put in but it's a problem. the??????????? the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same same same same same the same same same same same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same same same same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same same the same same the same same the same same same the same same same same same same the same the same same same same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same the same house th thi thi thi thi thi thoo thoooo you you you you the same house house house the same house the same house the same house the same house the not, that's the lowest level effort you could put in. But it's a problem because they can't earn money. No. I mean, no disrespect to your daughter. I don't know if I am just gonna, like in the old days, you just have someone who was 13. I don't know if I would just have the neighborhood 13 year old anymore. You couldn't get them to do a baby but a five-year-old like a six-year-old if they literally just go up they just sit there and go go to bed now. Yeah. It'd have to be that you couldn't leave them with like a proper baby. But what does she want money for Scott? What does she want to buy? Well she meets a mates so they go like they're doing that thing that you remember. So they meet in their own of their own. They're they're they're they're they're they're they're their own own own own own own own own own own own own own own own own they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're their own own own own own own own own own own own own own own own own own own own own own own own own their their their their to to to go to go to go their to their to go their their their their their they're they're they're they're Orlando. They go down the boulevards. What happens is they're at that weird age where they don't go to park now.

The park is, park is for kids, mate. We don't do parks now. So they do Costa. Costa. And what are they ordering? Well the problem is they order like a frape or summer, but that's six quid. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they they they they they they they they they they they're they're th. they're they're tho, tho, they're, tho, tho, they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they they. they they. they. they. they. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tha. tha. tha. tho. tho. thooo. tha. tha. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're tha is the order like a frapay or summer, but that's six quid. Yes. Yeah, of course. So we're in a generation now where these kids like to do what we did, it's a 20 quid

day, minimum. Yeah, yeah. Rather than being a costar, having a frapp over six quid, than being in the park with boys and cider. Thenagedlid thii. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th or? No, that actual, just an apple alcoholic drink. Oh right. But that's what it leads to. Teenage boys, teenage girls going to the park

when they're not there going for the swings anymore, that's Danger Zone. I mean, I wasn't involved in that as a teenager, but I heard about the other boys that were. And it sounded great. It sounded great. It great great great great great great great for th great for th great for th great for everyone great for everyone great for everyone great for everyone great for everyone great for everyone great for everyone great for everyone great for everyone th th th th th th th th th th th th th thoing thoing thoing thoing thou thou thi the parents. Is that what you said to your mom Rob? I have been invited, it sounds great, but I think it'd be awful for you, so I'm going to stay at home. Obviously I haven't been invited, I'd be too nervous to go and do if I

was. I love how you said invited, the way you said invited makes it it reali, could I come down there and try and get off of the girl? No, okay, okay that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. th. th. their thathea' that try and get off of the girl. No, okay that's fine. Was it six for six thirty? I went to a mixed school, people always go, oh single six schools are so bad because you'll have boys who just don't know how to talk to women. I went to school women still don't fucking know now. I've got three in my house. I still don't know how to talk to women. It's terrific their their th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. I thi. I thi. I thirty thirty thirty thirty thoomomomorrow thr-I thirty to to to to to to to to to to to to tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho. I tho. I tho. I tho. I tho. I tho. I tho. I tho. I thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. I th. I th. I because I remember that era. I think 14 is definitely the danger one. That's the danger age. I think we're still got innocence.

So like, I know that she goes with her mates, they have a cost of their cost to they go into town, she buys one top from H&M for like six quids and they do lots of wandering round shops. Same cost as the Frappuccino. Yeah same cost absolutely and mates have got no money either so they just go to boots and just put the tester's on like lipstick and stuff. Is that sort of innocence? Is it awkward when she's got mates if the parents are too free and easy with like the pocket money and then there's one that's buying three tops in H&M and they and they and they and they and they they they they they they they they they they they they's they's they's they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're th th th their th th th th th th th th th tip tip. tip. tip. tip. tip. tip. tip. tip. tip. tip. they're they're they. they're they're they're they're they'rethere's one that's buying three tops in H&M and they treat them like Jeff Bezos they're like oh my god have you

seen it she bought two frappies and three tops like yeah I think she's a millionaire I think luckily they've they're all on the same sort of financial means I think that's the problem if you have one that's wandering around like Joan Collins or something. Someone carrying bags behind it. Arisen an Uber. Yeah. Hi girls. She's on the innocent side of it now. So what do you think she's going to do for like her 14th birthday? Oh, I don't know. Is it like now going to, it's not ice skating anymore or anything like that is it? No, I mean my youngest went to an ice skating party and if that ever comes in again as an invite she's ill. She's a hundred percent ill. It is the most stressful, stressful day because you just wandering and you just go right, see you in A&E. It's literally a collarbone.

And off you go. And it's fun when they're little, but when they get to eight or nine and want to do it their own, it's horrible. Horrible so my seven-year-year basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically basically my my to to to to to to to to to the to to to th. to th. th. to th. to to to to to to to to to to the to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, th. Yeah, their their their their their their their their their their their their the. the. their the. I the. Yeah. Yeah, their th. Yeah basically held a penguin Yeah, yeah, rightened in a bauble at one the plastic ones just to be clear Yeah, one of the yeah, it's it's a not at some brush style ice rink real penguins just sliding about but she held on to this plastic penguin Shat herself and then got off the ice and add a burger that was the party. That's my dream for my child that's my dream for my child if she goes to a to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the plastic the plastic the plastic the plastic the plastic the plastic the plastic the plastic the plastic their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. th. th. the. the. the. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. their their the their their their their their their their their and add a burger. That was the party. That's my dream. Amazing. That's my dream for my child if she goes to an ice skating party. It's just bedlam as well. There's people, they've opened it up to the public so there's people flying around. It's just, it's too stressful. Anything like that. Forget it, mate. And then you'll say, I made one little comment because my daughter absorbs fear. Like I said to her her. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their, I, I, I, I, I'll their, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll their, I'll th. th. th. th. th. their, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It's just, th. It's just, th. It's just, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, theeateateatea. It's just just just just, their. It's just just just, theateateateatea. It's just just just, their. It's just, their, their fear. Like I said to her, if you fall down, bring your

fingers in because someone will skate over them and you'll lose them. And as soon as I said that, I realized I'd just introduced that as a possibility. Yeah, so she was still there like that. Just like Connor McGregor. Ready for a fire. And it was just like, basically that's been a whole afternoon of fear. So yeah, she doesn't do that sort of live. She sort of but then there's moments where, what's really sweet there's moments where you can see the child still. Like little glimmers like she'll say, love you. She disappeared to a room with all the food in the house and then said, love you on the way up the stairs and I thought, we're not full teenage angst quite yet. So what about for Christmas? What do you get a teenager these days? Phone?

Does she got a phone? She's got a phone. The phone is the problem, really. I wish I'd never bought a one. What age did she get it? She got it at like this. Is it a full access smartphone? Yeah, it's an iPhone 7 but she sort of falls asleep with it like it's a pro advert for consumerism when your child's just, that should be the advert for

Apple, a child with an apple phone on their head. A sleep. And do you have any rules with it? Doesn't sound, I'll be honest, doesn't sound like it. No. Do you know what? The ones she loves you, taking a phone to bed. It's really difficult because me and Jemma come from both sides of two different parenting angles.

I don't know if it's the same for you guys. You start to realize this as well, like my my my my my my, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, the the the the the their, their's the same for you guys. You start to realize this as well, like my, I would have rules. I would have the phone is downstairs at 8 o'clock. And Gemma's a bit more let her find a level and let her, you know, trust in her instincts. And to be fair, that is winning out. She's never not done her homework. She's never up to one in the morning. It does, she does, she does, to sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort, to find, to find, to find, to find, to to to find, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, of find her things, but it does, it's very difficult because I feel like I need to influence it because I'm not around as much. But then I think she is actually finding a level, bizarrely. I think she is actually regulating herself. Because if it's too strict, they just don't want to do whatever you're saying, just

out of sort of rebellion. And you will never be...Rob, you're lighting, by the way. You look like I'm fucking doing a seance or something. What's going on? I just leant back. Well, basically, I've had a fucking night with me. My microphone's broke. I'm holding this little one again. I'm underneath a skylight which I'm getting this weird light like that.

I'm just fucking my day is just really horrible. It's the best bit. I had a little moment of piece here as I thought I'll just lean back because my back's hurting so I'm to hold it and it just immediately. It looks like a little microphone that Terry Wogan had on blanket blanket. Like a tiny little... I'm channeling in him. I thought you were trying to trying to inject some sort of light heartiness into my conversation it was just such a weird move to lean back like a ventriloquist doll. It looks like one of. And also I've got my daughter's headphones on. Oh my god. It's been bit bit. It's a bit. It's a bit. It's a bit. It's a bit... It's like a little bit. It's a the the the the the the the other. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's like. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. the. the. the. the. the. the. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It. It's. I've got my daughter's headphones on. Only one works and the other one's been bit by a dog.

Haven't you got a Spotify deal? What's happened to this podcast? We're using my first headphones. They're broken. I know I need a headphone deal. Oh my word. It's just been... It's just well like we're doing this in December and it's like what happens is it got my kids' birthdays in December and then we're trying to be social and so just there's so much going on. And then my my kids broke my other

mic here that the kids broke the thing snapped off inside it that's my normal one so now mold me little where it's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so much so their there's so there's so much so much so much so much so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so there's so much there's so much there's so much there's so much their their their their their th so much th so much th so much th so much th so much their th so much thoo tho tho their their their there's so here that the kids broke The thing snapped off inside it. That's my normal one. Oh, now molding me little where up Terry Wogan my Whenever Stephen Bartlett talks about how he set up his podcast and you know how our success is and how much is growing and all that I just sort of feel like oh should I be doing that because at the moment I'm holding It's like you've got you've suddenly grown and you've got massive hands and a tiny mic it's got no lily put I'm there. What's the mic for normally the little mic? I just found it in a drawer this is nor normally you can clip it onto a little thing and I'll put a bigger side profile it's even funnier I'm sorry. It's got an R and an out on it. I don't know what that means, it's right and left, but yeah, so sorry.

It's all right? Yeah. But Stephen Bartlett goes, he just wears a black t-shirt so that every episode because he doesn't want his emotional journey to distract from what the episode is. But I think that's sort of what makes this podcast is that you can look at this, this will get clipped up, almost definitely, the terrible light in my little mic. And you can just look at a man that isn't coping with his schedule, essentially. Because also, if we want time off at Christmas with the kids, we have to record more in the lead up to it, she makes it really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really it really it really it really it really it really it really it really it really it really th it really th it really thi it really thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, and I thi, and I thi, thi, thi, thi, like, to to to to to to to to thi, and I thi, and I thi, and I their, and I their, and I their, like, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, to th....... And, to to to thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. to to thi. to to to to to to thi. to to to thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, to record more in the lead up to it, makes it really stressful. Yeah. And I just can't juggle it all to go. I think, I said to Gemma, I said this time a year as well.

No one knows what's going. Everyone's driving like bricks. Everyone's driving like bricks. Everyone's got too much, too much on the mind. Yes, everyone's angry. It's just very stressful time. It's very stressful time. thi. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. I's thi. I's thi. I's thi. I's thi. I'm this this this thi. I's this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this thi. I. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I said thi. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. time ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. thi. thi. I said thi wants to do that. And it's just too much, there's too much packed into one month. Exactly. I'm feeling it. I'm feeling that. Because it feels like the month ends halfway through. You've got to get the month done. Yeah. December is done by the 19th. It's done. Yeah. Well I hope this goes out before January. Or otherwise we'll put a thing where, unfortunately Rob didn't survive, Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob, th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. the th. th. the th. th. the th. the th. th. the th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi's the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. the. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the to. the the. the. the. thing where unfortunately Rob didn't survive January. This was recorded before. Yeah, he had a full breakdown. He's in the prairie. He should be out mid-February. But it's such a difficult one because that's a thing. I think I think at the moment we're definitely both feeling it actually. I mean that's why I think we've got it's quite good. Gem is much more calm than I am. I'm flat I'm everywhere everywhere. I'm everywhere. I'm everywhere. I'm everywhere. I'm everywhere. I'm everywhere. I'm everywhere everywhere everywhere everywhere everywhere everywhere everywhere everywhere everywhere everywhere everywhere everywhere everywhere. I'm not everywhere. I'm not everywhere. I'm not everywhere. I'm not everywhere. I'm not everywhere. I'm not the the the the th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm th. I'm I'm flat I'm everywhere at the moment I'm not I'm not a home it's mad and I think the Christmas get you're doing a lot of Christmas gigs at them like because you're not doing them Josh

you seem a bit calm with me the Christmas Grigs are sending me slightly insane because people are mental at Christmas gigs yeah yeah they're all drunk and it's so hard to get them to listen yeah so I think it's to their thi so to I to I the the to the their I they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're thi I thi thi they're thi they're their they're their their their their their they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they they they they they're they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're not I I I I I I I they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're to to to to to thi I thi thi to to to thi to to to thi to thi to to thi thi to their so so so so so so thi thi their their they're not not not they're not they're can you can't tell I hide it I'm hiding it so well completely I mean you not know I mean looking at that picture there you look completely saying yeah flying into the moon the tiny little mic from the 70s oh Scott how is Christmas because obviously Christmas is yeah the biggest thing in my daughter who's six is life how is it with a seven and a 13 year old to thi tho tho tho? th. I I I I I I I th. I th. I th. I th. I you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you the the you you you you you you you you you you you're you're you're not you're not you're not you you the you're not you're not you're not you're not you're you're you're you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. you that that the that that that that that the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the biggest thing in my daughter who's six is life. How is it with a seven and a 13 year old? Has, like, because I think when I was 13, it was more of a means to get stuff by that point? Yes. Anything else really?

Do you know what's lovely about Liv and I've got to hand this to us, she is sort of, she goes with it for Sophia. Yes. So she knows what's the deal is. I'm 100% sure she knows what's going on. But like for example, she'll get into the spirit of it. She's banging to Bubbley. I can hear Bubblet coming out all the time of times. She's banging to let you know, they are.

This time of year, something happens in December, and my mom and dad get like Mick Jagger Energy. Okay. Like, do you know, they become like these, they're in the 70s, but my mom just goes, Christmas is the time. She just absorbs it. So my dad used to dress as Santa when with with the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. the, the, the, th, th, th, the, the, the, th, th, their, their, their, th, th, their, to, their, their, to, to, to, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, th... to, to, to, to, to me, too, too, too, too, to me, to, to, to dress as Santa when with every Christmas Eve they've done this party at their house for however long I can remember. And my dad, I remember once

he used to, it used to get my mates who'd come round and then they'd turn on the outside light. And my mom had like a script. They had like a little game going where they got, who's that? the bottom of the garden. And they'd be like, it their their their their their their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th. th. their, their, tho, their, tho, their, their, their, their, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, their, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, their, their. their, their. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I's, th. I's, th. I's, th. I'm, th. I'm, tho. I'm, thoooooooooooooooooo. However, the. However, thooooooooooooooooo. However, their, their of the garden and they'd be like, it's Santa and he'd all have to go down and it was my dad and I remember he had his painting trainers on one year just poking out the bottom and I was like, I think we know this is a complete room. But they were back, they're banging to Christmas and I think live is definitely, she goes with it like we're gonna go to a fat, you know one of of of of of of the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their.. It's. It's. their. their. It's. their. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's their. He's their. He's their. He's their. He. He. He. He. He. He. He.. He. He... He. He. He.. He. He.. He. He. He. He's is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the train is train is train. It's train. It's train. It's train. It's training. It's training. It's training. training. training training training t one of these farms that they open up for Christmas. You know these ones where they... The grotto, the Grotto. The grotto, the rest of the time of the year when the kids pass around a bewildered guinea

pig, you know that sort of? Yeah, yeah. I do just think they just chuck in a deer and you wouldn't. So Liv goes to all that. She goes through the motions of it all. But yeah, the seven-year-old is really into it. Like, it's excited, very excited. The usual trigger warning. We're about to talk about Father Christmas if you're listening.

Does your seven-year-old believe in Father Christmas? Yeah, definitely. Absolutely a hundred percent. It's an interesting one because I used that the other day. I'm not proud of that. When she was badly behaved I said, you know, he's watching, do you know that man? I drop that in. I was like, he's here I can see you. And it was like that moment where there was a little flash of, I don't know if I believe him, but it's enough of a, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough, it's enough guilt, it's enough guilt to emotionally manipulate a child, isn't it? Let's be honest. It's one of those things where you don't want to use it, but you feel like we're at death, call one. When it's five to nine and she still hasn't put her shoes on. I was like, he's watching, mate. We're bringing out the is watching. What's your answer for for Christmas? My eldest has asked for a stereo, which that's fine.

She's from 1983. Yeah. She's a boombox. Is she gonna walk around with it on her shoulder? And then drop it down and do some break dancing. She's asked for some rebutt pop. Do you need a stereo for kids anymore? Is it just a speaker that you connect your phone to? Well, they they they they they they they 't if my I mean I come to think of it she dresses and tweed and drives a

Ford Capri. She's a child of the 80s or something but she's no I think it's because they like to go they sometimes buy them from the charity shops and stuff and she's I took her to see the Arctic monkeys yeah at Coventry and she loved it I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I their their I their I their I their. I their. I they they they they they they they they to they to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to c. I to c. I to c. I'm to c. I'm to c. I'm to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to c. to c. I to c. I to c. I to c. I to c. I to c. I th. I th. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I took. I took. I took. I took. I took. I took. I to c. I to c. I to c. I to c. I to c. I to c. I took her to see the Arctic monkeys, yeah, at Coventry, and she loved it. I mean, I couldn't recognize any of the songs and I'm a big fan, but he's having fun with them into. He's enjoying himself. I thought like, have we gone to see, you know, it was like, Bert Bacarac at one point? I think he had Rob's Mike, look good on the dance floor. I was just like can we just sing him at the speed

in which they recorded? That would be lovely. So you took us to see the Arctic Monkeys because she likes buying CDs. Yeah so I think I've ignited a passion for music and I always you always want your kid to like the same music you do. Have you come to her or she come to you? What's really interesting is her and her mates one of them they had like. the their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. tho. they they they to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th... th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. to to you. What's really interesting is, her and her mates, one of them came round and they had like an AM t-shirt on. This was before I knew she was into that sort of music. You know like the Arctic Monkeys are a heritage band for these people? Totally. It's terrifying Josh it makes you feel so old. It's like if I'd liked the Beatles when I was a good, that is the equivalent, yeah. the the equivalent, the the, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the their, their their their their their th. their their, their, their, their, th. th. th. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their their their their their their their th. th. th. I I I I th. I th. I th. I th. th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. th. the. the. th. the. th Beatles around that is the equivalent yeah we are 18 years whatever the first I'm yeah yeah yeah that's what I think I am that's what I'm not yeah yeah yeah yeah we're 18 years from that so that's the equivalent of when I was

13 yeah yeah it being so I listen to the sex pistols it's insane it's so like I I always want to an hour it's try and not not be that guy where you're like you go into the bedroom and go, well if you I think you'll find the germination of the idea from, do you know, come in in there and go, I remember the first album. This is room music girls, put that on and get an education. I saw them at turn. I saw them at Old Trafford with Amy Winehouse. That's where that's the germination of the idea the idea the idea the idea the idea ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas ideas the ideas ideas the ideas ideas the ideas the ideas the ideas the ideas the ideas their their their started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started started, I'm afraid. And have you noticed to change their style for every single album? Thanks, Dad, just drift back out. But yeah, so they're into it through AM. So then I capitalized on that. I gave her all my old CDs, Arctic Monkeys ones. And so she's sort of, she's now big. Even though she can't play them because she hasn't got a stereo. Well, no, she's got a little pink stereo. Well. go well with your headphones. A little pink stereo. That's the last remnants of her being a child in her bedroom really.

It's quite sweet. So she wants a proper one. She wants a proper one, which is what we're going to get her. Yeah, CD player, didn't know? You can still buy them, yeah. But what's wonderful about when your kid discovers music at 13, they go off into this, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi.eea.ea.ea.ea, thi. It's, thi. It's, thi.e. It's, thi, their, th 13, they go off into this rabbit hole where they start, you start hearing stuff coming out of the bedroom, so like you'll be walking, I'll be walking past the landing. And then like the other day I heard like a bit of the Smiths and like a bit of a bit of Oasis and you go,

oh that she's tracing the lineage from the Arctic Monkies back. And is that, it's so so so so that she so that she so that she so that she's so that she's so that she's so that's so that's so that's so that's so that's so thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. their, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, I's, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I's, I I I I I I I I I's, I I I I I I I I I's, I I I I I's, I I I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I'll the the the the the the thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th th th th th th th th th th th th thi. th th th thi. th thi. I'll the the thi.'s just doing that through like Spotify, which is obviously an excellent app that everyone should download. Because when I was a kid, I was a teenager, I remember reading about the Smiths and going, I wonder what that sounds like, and going to buy, saving up and going to buy the CD and coming back and playing the CD. But she could just click on everything, ever. And that's the thing now it's it's so easy for them to do that. And I remember going out to my mate's house this is when I was like 14 her age actually and he used to get the enemy and he was so cool. Do you know when you've got like a really cool mate?

He had three older brothers. It was like wandering into some sort of a green room at backstage or some at and I'd just go to his house that we'd read the enemy in silence, didn't really speak to each other, then I'd just go, oh, it's really surreal. Yeah, it's just really bizarre, but yeah, so she's in that now. It's very exciting I think, stage. Have you got a stereo for a yeah? Yeah, sorted it. Oh, you've sorted. I'll just found a good one on Carries in the sale. I'm not going to take any tech advice from a man holding what accounts to a chubber chuck. It's basically an electronic chubber chuck. Yeah I know it looks absolutely insane doesn't it? But yeah so she's into that but it's an exciting phase actually the teenage. So when you heard your daughter playing the Smiths did you go in and go have you at any point

held out the hand of kind of we can do this together and how did it go down? Yes I have. I've sort of I've said to her so that's when I book the Tickets for At Monkeys, it's the start of sort of us doing something together, I think. So I'm thinking of... And the end. And probably the end. Well, I said to it, I said, you love the Smiths. Don't Google articles about Morrissey towards his later years.

Yeah, it's a bit weird. Up until the, you know, just stick with and I and then move on. But it's a wonderful moment being sat with your daughter. We were sat together at Coventry, which you know it's a very... Is it the Rico Arena? Yeah, it's a bizarre place to do gigs. A huge old place. And I was sort of sat there and I thought, oh for the first time I'm sitting with her as like a mate. I've gone to a gig. As a peer. As an equal, we're not, she's not father-daughter and she was like, it was a moment where, and I looked round, but there was loads of other dads with same age. And I thought, oh my god, they've managed to appeal across a generation. Yeah. They've done it and it's very surreal. And but it was funny because as soon as they played a new one collectively everyone went oh fuck I'm including the kids as well?

Well the weird thing was is live likes the most stuff like the car and the tranquility base motels. It likes that sort of stuff but it just doesn't translate well live it's more it's more immersive I think. What was it like how experience of a big gig like that? I mean I've took it to latitude with me a few times. So when you get the plus she started to cotton on to the fact that you got a plus one and I remember I said to it she said are you doing which she was really behind me for my career you need to do these festivals. And then she she th th th th th. She th. She th. She th. She th. She th. She th. She th. She th. She th. She th. She th. She th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I th. I th. I th. I th. It. It's. It's. It's just. It's just. It's just. I th. I th. I took. I took. I'm. took. I've. took. I've. took. I've took. I've. I've. I've. I've. I've to do these festivals, daddy. And then she said, I remember when she said, do you get a ticket? And I said, yeah, she went, oh, right. Can I come? And I remember that was the first time she'd ever been interested.

Yeah. So does she, because a 13's an interesting time for your dad to be a comedian? How does she feel about you being a comedian? Doesn't give a shit in any way at all. And this is the point is, so when we went to Latitude, I took her to see Manic Street preachers, Fontey's DC, things like that. She really saw a load of stuff. And when I was on in the comedy tent,

I looked round to see if she was, she wasn't there. And then I found her in the hospitality in the hospitality in the hospitality in the hospitality in the hospitality in the hospitality in the hospitality in the hospitality in the hospitality in the hospitality in the hospitality in the hospitality in the then I found her in the hospitality tent smashing through the rider so well not alcohol no just biscuits crisps and she she just loved holding it up like a wristband going my dad's on there mate so much yeah I think I can have an extra whisper so back off when we started going to doing them you know we've done all the festivals there's a comment you do like latitudeitude, Redding Leeds or whatever Glastonbury and stuff and you sort of get a bit used to where you do the gig and leave and leave and leave and just boot off to another one. If you do Redding and Leeds you have

to do both on the Friday and Saturday. But for them, if they get a ticket and they are the best thicket thicket thicket thick thick th the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the and the and theateat, the the at the and the and the the the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th and th and the the the the the and the and the the and the and the the and the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the and the and the and the and the and to to to thean, to to to to to to to thean, to to thean, thean, thean, the an the an the an th. Last time I went there... Reading and Leeds is mental. They are so young. It's basically children in neon running around. And you walk on and go, hey guys, do you remember the 80s or something? And they're just like, no. And you just, you've got no. Because they've all just done their GC or they're all 16 to 19 and they. And I'm trying trying trying trying trying try try try they're just they're just just just just just just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just. they're all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just all just. they're all just. they're all just. they're all just. they're all just. they're all just. they're all just. they're all just. they're all just. they're all just. they're all. they're all. they're all. they're all. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they're all just. they're all just. they're all. they're. they're. they're all 16 to 19 and they. And I'm trying to talk to them about my fucking, you know, Nightlight.

Yeah, my bad neck or my pillow or whatever. Yeah, I just want to talk to them one on one about my tiny dick. But you sort of realize as well you go like, I can't connect to these people, but when I was there with live. And I shouldn't be able to be weird if I could yes a grown man of 44 just being a massive hit with the 16 year old yeah my fan base tends to stop at 16 to be honest that's why I like it yeah why suspicious of people that really connect with young people yeah okay is that by design by accident yeah that never that that never ends well that does it no I'm fine to go th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi I'm thi I'm thi I'm thi I'm thi I'm th th th thi I thi I'm thi th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thee to theeee to theeeeeeeeeeee thi the thee thi thi thi thi thi they by design? By accident. Yeah, that never ends well that, does it?

No. I mean, I'm fine to go with Nanna's. Anything up to Nannas you're on safe ground with, if Nanners like, yeah, but yeah, it's, there's certain festivals I couldn't, I just feel like I don't relate to, but yeah, I've took friend to Reading or Leeds whichever it was whichever you can get the ticket by doing the gig but I don't want to see you I don't want to ever see you for the whole weekend because you you you embarrass me it's it's that weird thing you saw your fucking attitude out if you want this ticket off me yeah stop trying to talk to me about the Stone Roses dad I don't give a shit yeah and to to to the the the to the the the the to the the the the the the th. the th. th. th. I th. I th. S I th. S I th. I just just just just just just just just just just just th. I'm th. S. S. S. I'm just just thi. I'm just th. S. I'm to to th. I'm to th. I's to th. I's to the the the th. I I I I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I the the th. I the the the the the the th. I the the th. I'm th. I'm the thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm te. I'm teeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. I's. I'm tc. I'm tc. I'm t. I'm trying to talk to me about the Stone Roses dad. I don't give a shit. Yeah, and stop wandering around your little microphone doing YouTube and stuff. Imagine, Steve Lamax on six music.

Leave me alone. Ha ha ha ha. Not telling me about the days of the evening session. I don't want to know dad. But it's very difficult because you do end up going down that rabbit hole and when we have Christmas and the family come round Gemma's mom and dad bang on about the 60s yeah and you feel like going oh we all do it we all do it but luckily for you your daughter likes what you like yeah yes that's what you're desperate for in it Josh no I'm not really do you know what I mean I quite like

my life and her life and never the train shall meet. What? What are you doing a bit? No. I like that she likes Duelepa and I like what I like and I'm quite happy that we've got different tastes. Do you not like Jewelep? I do like it, I do like Dualieper, but I wouldn't listen to her in my own time. And actually I quite like that. I come to that. I come that. that. that. Do that. Do that. Do that. Do that. Do that. Do that. Do that. I that. I that. I that. Do that. I th that. I that. I th th th that. I that. I that. I that. I that. that. that. th. th. What. that. that. What, what that. What, what you. What, what. What, what. What, what. What. What. What. What. What. What. What, what. What, what. What, what. What. I. I. I. I, what. I, what. I, I, I, I, what. I, I, I, I, I, I, I th. I, I, I th. I, I, I th. I, I th. I, I th. I, I, I th. I, I, I, I th. I, I, I, th. th. I, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th got different tastes. Do you not like Jeweleper? I do like I do I like Deweeper but I wouldn't listen to her in my own time and actually I quite like that I come to that through my daughter rather than... But you'd go to watch Duolipa with her and enjoy it. Yeah I would go to watch Duolip with her and I would enjoy it probably more than she would probably to be probably more than she she th she th she th she th she th she th she th she th she th she would th she th she th she th she th she th she th I I th she th I th I th I th th th th th th blur gig with you. I'd go, look, none of your mates are into this.

It's weird that you're into it. You're 13, you're into blur in 2029. What's going wrong? I'm just bullying your daughter of a task. But dad, do you like it too? I think we could go together. it because it's for sad old pricks like me. You can't stop it converging though. They find good music. That's the problem. I loved the Beatles. I loved and to be fair that was a thing where me and my parents could meet it halfway was that

we all love the Beatles. It's quite standoffish. You talk about like a real conflict with them. It's the only thing we'd talk about. Like England and German soldiers playing football on Christmas Day, but the Beatles was our meeting point. I just got visions of you sat both ends of a giant dining room table, complete silence, not getting anywhere and then just at one point. Listening to one my guitar gently weeps. Put on Love Me Do, we need a treat, we need a peace treaty. No, I got on very well with th w well with with with th w well with th w well with th th th th th th th th th that that that that that that that the that that that that the that that thathe a very the the thag- the with my parents what I mean is that was one of

the that and Plymethar Gile were the things we had in common if you're right. Yes and television yeah actually I'd fuck loads in common with them don't know what I'm talking about you see I they take over the car though that's the thing live takes over the car now yeah so whenever the so when the the th so the th so so whenever so whenever so whenever so whenever so whenever so whenever so whenever so whenever so whenever so whenever the so the so whenever the so whenever the so whenever the so whenever we the so whenever we we so th so when th so when we we th so when we we th so th so when th so when th so when th so when wee wee wee they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they to to to try try try try try to try try try to try try to try try to to to to to to to they've just given up on that, yeah. It's stressful though, in it, because the skipping and the... Well, because you have to do one each, they get a song each. In turn, we do it. Literally we add, because it's Siri, they're just shouting. I'm trying to drive. Um, Scott, we always what's the one thing she does that annoys you and if you were to

listen back she'd go yeah he's got a point I should stop doing that as a parent I think I'll start with the things that we're very compatible in in many ways which is lovely that is one of the least romantic things I've ever heard no incredibly compatible with we're like an HGMI cable into the port. However, there is some things we're not compatible on. Internal body temperature. Hers is operating at a different level to mine. I don't know what's going on there. And one thing I've noticed is she cannot scroll through a Sky TV planner at the same speed as me. And it really gets on my tip.

You wouldn't think this is annoying, but she's got slow eyes. And it's really, it's like a condition where she will have to read every synopsis on every single. And I'm like, mate, this is late night TV deals with Derek this is QVC there's no big line here that's just move I can look and go nothing on bed yeah so that's the thing I think we're incompatible on but I would say that the one thing that she does is it's just the lightness she brings a light I think I could get too bogged down in like, you know, money and the sort of relentless, do you know what I mean, of life of

trying to provide us anxiety, yes, whereas Jemma provides that sort of, she's literally inside now decorating the house, Christmas trees, all that's going up, so she's always making sure that the train of positivity is held on the you make sure it gets the the the the the the the the the the money, to the to the the the the the the to the the the the the the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the the, the, the, threate, threate, threaten, threaten, the, the, threate, threats, they, so somea, threats, they, they, their, their, sure that the the train of positivity is held on the touch. You make sure it gets to the station but she makes sure that when we all get they're all happy and love each other still. Yeah when we get to the station I'd yeah then I'm happy. You're not just vomiting blood there's a lovely Christmas tree up and you're enjoying yourself. Yeah I'm like an action film I'm clinging on to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the top of the train, avoiding bridges, you know, terrified and then I get to the station and I'll start to unwind after about four days.

Scott, we will promote, we didn't do this so I'll say it now and then we'll do it before in the bit when we intro you on. What do these places have in common? Lincoln, Lincoln, Huddysh-Phattahs, their, Lincoln, Lincoln, Rotherham, Oxford, Carlisle, Cheltenham, Exeter and Great Torrington. There are all venues that I'm doing my tour show for the final leg, Great Scott in February 2024. There we go. Buy a ticket, Scott is unbelievable live. Yeah. You've extended it from demand It's been smashing it. So well done, Scott. It's been great fun. Two of those places are the places you are with us. I know I've piggybacked off your success.

I can't help her. I literally have. It was the same night as soon as I came off stage. I thought that went well. that went well. that went to the working progress gigs for the parent in hell live so well. So well to go and buy and buy and the the the the the th. th. th. th. th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th tho tho tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. that that. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. the. t. t. to. to. to. toge. toge. toge. toge. toge. toge. toge. to. toge. toge. to. to. to so go and buy a ticket thank you Scott thank you for having me where can I get a ticket Scott Scott Bennett Comedy.covekott UK forward slash live all right I'm gonna go and find a smaller microphone see you later and try and sort my life out cheers Scott thank you so much bye bye bye