Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S8 EP3: CAR PASSENGER ETIQUETTE

Episode Date: January 16, 2024

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Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. And I'm Josh Winnockham. Welcome to Parenting Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So, to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern-day parenting, each week we're chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're they're tha be hearing from you the listener with your tips, advice and of course, tales of parenting woe. Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times when none of us know what we're doing.

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You did Rob Beckett. Rob Beckett. And you did Josh Whitticam? Jossel Ludicum? Neve? Did he Rob Beckett? Well. And you did Josh Wedicom? Very good. Love it.

So yeah. Where's that? Belfast? Yeah. Oh, God, you're going to love the dad's name as well. Oh, come on liquid gold in the ear. He's called Axel. Oh. I think it's going to be like a sexy French name, Axel.

No, I think Axel is quite cool, isn't it? I just think of Axel Rose. Yeah, he's not cool. I'm calling him Cool. Axel. No Yeah, Axel Rose isn't cool. Hello Rob, Josh and Michael. This is my daughter Camille and my daughter Neve. Do you want to have a go at the spelling of Neve, Rob? N-I-A-M-H? Correct. Yes, Camille is three. In March, Neve is 14 months. My wife Anna are a long-time list to the podcast and came to the live at the O- last year. As you can hear I am French and Anna is Irish as evidenced by the kids names. I speak French to the kids Anna speaks

English so there's a lot of resulting from English spoken in the house. Right Because what's the French knave, N-E-V-E? Yes I've got to go and answer the door. My clean is here. Sorry. What we're talking about? Right. You just tap your yes and mic for me please. Oh yeah. Ha ha ha ha. All right let's go. That was proper slapstick. At points there, it felt like they trained, you know what they sometimes trained gorillas

to communicate and it was like the first ever podcast with a gorilla and a cube. You just trap that mic and it fell over. Oh, anyway. Why have I got other items in my fucking... So what are you, what are you doing now on your phone? Well, Rob, I've been pondering this. But I haven't pulled the trigger on it. Come on. Okay, Botox.

I think that's too little too late. Um, I, um, it's a mole skin notebook. Okay. And how does the mole feel about that? Yeah, right. Bit of fun, bit of fun. But when you write in it, it's a special, no, it can't be mole skin. It's a special. No, it can't be mole skin.

It's a special. That would be meant to if that's it through the net. People are protesting all sorts of red paint all. Ain't thrown on me when I'm... Moles are getting skinned so you can write about... I'm sat in a cafe writing some stand-up, someone thread some red paint all over me. Oh, it is a natural heavyweight cotton with durable twild weaving that is not cultivated from moles in any capacity. Right. So...

All right, go. When you write in the notebook, it has got a smart pen and it will go to the computer. Yes, I've seen that. Yeah, and it will turn it into type. That's clever. So you write it out and it turns it into type. Yeah. It's a bit expensive, is it? What's holding you back?

The it's so boring. It's not going to make the podcast. I think it will at this stage. There's not much more to go in it. I've got some good anecdotes. No, tell you basically you don't want it because people think you look like a loser with it. No, that hadn't crossed my mind for now I'm worried. Right, okay, so that's an extra thing. No, it's a business purchase. So I need to do it on my business card,

but my business card. Right, so because it's a business expense. Yeah. What was the French Axel saying? Also I think a French person when you hear them speak you know they're French. You never I think out of all the different nationalities. Yeah it's the clearest. Yeah. Even American it could be Canada. Yeah. And Spanish it could be like a South American Spanish country Should we head to Asia or we're gonna get into problematic territory We just keep it Europe you're gonna keep it Europe Okay, he brought the good work with the pod I think a Nigerian accent is quite you know someone's Algerian Nigerian

Nigerian yeah yeah you panicking let's get back to the email yeah yeah Keep up the good work on the pod. Kept us smiling through the challenges of two under two. Aux. Aux, Aux, Aux, thu. Lovely. Thank you very much for listening. Bonnetu. Good, tha. Bonneto. that, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know what that. I don't know what that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that meant that meant that meant that meant that that that that that meant. that meant. that meant. that meant. that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. I tho. I th. I tho. I that. I that. I that. I that. that. that and you. Is that? I don't know. I just literally said Bonnetu. It sounds like a brand on Etsy. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Don't you. It's never happened. So first of all, I should apologize to being slightly late and it's quite a funny reason while I was late. Okay, yeah. Because I'm struggling to get up in the mornings, Josh in January.

I find a very, I don't know one of those people that go, oh, I get that sad thing but I do struggle without a bit of on my face because it's dark and cold and I don't like the cold. Anyway, I got up early, done my hair look quite nice don't I do think? It's quite smart. It looks super. It looks like you're going on the apprentice, like you've really tried to get your hair sharp for the boardroom. Well yeah it got cut the other day, big up Millers in Petswood but she told me to but because I've got it like swept back a little bit and a part in use moose because sometimes wax can get a little bit like sticky and a bit like yeah a bit of moose and you basically in the morning. V. O five? No it's she is her one but you can use any moose. I know it's a brand of moose but you can use any moose and you basically put in your hair drop.

the hair drop. you're in the mafia but as it dries it doesn't look as sticky and it looks quite dry look we need to see the picture of you when you comb it back initially I'll do it I'll do it to my picture I'm looking for because I'll send a picture tomorrow of what it looks up when I first do it but the problem is like chemical in your hair when that goes swimming, if I forget to have a shower before and I was in the pool and I started like blinding myself and I didn't know what's going on and the girl's like there's all white froth on your head, there's white froth on it. It was like burning my eyes going down to flumes.

Oh really 90s injury. Your mafia look is slightly ruined by the fact you're wearing a hoodie with a huge All Saints logo on it. Yeah, I'm not really an All Saints guy actually normally. More spice girls. Ha ha ha ha ha. Here we go. I felt like smoke coming off that. The speed of it is it flurked. Yeah, it's got a little shark on it and I was cold once and it was cheap in the shop so so I got it. Where it caught like. Anyway I'm here now. So I was getting. I was I was I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was getting. I was. I was. I'm. I'm a the. I'm a the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. I'm a. I'm a. I'm a. I'm a. I'm a. I'm a. I'm a. I'm a the. I'm a the. I'm a the. I'm a the. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm a the. I'm a the. so I got it. Where I can't like, anyway, I'm here now and then, oh yeah, so I was getting already to come out and I brought some food because I'm here at the office for a full day. But I put my, basically my office is like 20 minutes from my house but I put the address in, but the address to my office is very similar to like the postcode very similar to like a cinema we go to. Oh, I.. Oh, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, a, a, a. I'm, a. I'm, a. So, a. I'm, a. So, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, th. So, I'm, like, like, I was like brilliant and it's all about 20 minutes, sometimes 25 if there's traffic.

Anyways, I'm like, that's a bit, it's a bit of a different route. You know, that's good isn't it? I've never been this route. It's quite clear. I've got to be that in five minutes. God ways. It's like they've built a road for me going, you know, as I'm driving I'm thought, this is weird. And then I'm stuck in horrendous traffic and then it's like, bloody L and I'm like, it's good, and I'm like, oh, God dear. And it's really bad traffic to do some road. How bad must it be on the normal route for him? I've got it in and it goes from 10 mean, I'm like, but it's any turn I'm 10 minutes away. I went, oh, let me let me put my postcode in to see if there's another route.

I put it in and it goes from 10 minutes to 35. I'm like, no, I don't realize I've just put the correct, so I've driven 20 minutes the wrong way. Oh no. And not only if I've driven the wrong way, I'm late. So I'm here now, ready to pod, got some stuff. I did notice this on the way, Josh, and it's very difficult to bring out about looking like an actual pervert, that the secondary school girls going to school in minus two degrees wearing a skirt, socks, no tights, bare legs, no tights or trousers. I just don't understand what's going on Josh. Okay, it must be cold. Should we get back to the Nigerian accents? Yeah you're just gonna... So I've basically got on a detour and I've been noticing the girl's legs. Yeah you were just gonna... Now I'm in the office.

These girls must be cold. And were you leaning out the windows? Yeah, I mean I've got convertible now, I've that to, so, so, so, should, so, should, should, should, should, to to to to to to to to to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get back back back back to get the the the the the the the the the the the the to get the the to get the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their tie. Should tie. Should tie. Should tie. Should tie. Should tieg. Should toge. Should toge. Should toge. Should toge. Should the office. These girls must be cold. And were you leaning out the windows? Showing... I mean, I've got convertible now, haven't I? So I had that down. And I'm doing laps of the school, just double checking. And it's a joke out there, John. But no, I just couldn't believe it? I just don't know would you what would you say? I'd say

you're not going to be cold. And they'd go no. No. I'm not. It's minus two they'll go yeah. And I'm going it's really cold. Yeah. It's kind of check mate by that point in it. Yeah. And then you just got to go. Are you just doing it to boys give you attention? I'm not nothing. Oh God you're going to be going through some absolute. Oh, just like no, it's minus two degrees. I think you're going to be too cold. I won't be. What can you say? Yeah, exactly. Why it's like when a toddler doesn't wear a coat? All you can do then is take the coat with you and then, but you can't do that with a child. You can't get on the bus with a pair of tights.

15 year old girls tights, just in case they change their mind. Who's that? It's be dad. He just comes along with theats. Anyone else? You're going spare. It's me a job? Same the other dad's a job. Got five pairs. Rob, she left school eight years ago.

I'm a concerned dad. But yeah, so that was I was stuck in traffic watching these, this school going. I was like, thu' to park up to watch. to watch. to watch. to watch. to watch. to watch. to watch. to watch. to watch. to watch. to watch. to watch. to watch. to watch. to watch. to watch. to watch. to watch. to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the their the same. the same. to be the same. the same. the same. the same. the same. the same. the same. the same. the same. their the same. the same. Gane. the same. the same. the the same. the the same. the same. the same. the same. the same. the the the same. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tape. tape. things. things. things. things. things. things. things. things. things. things. things. things. things. things. that. the in traffic watching these this school going I was like this is mental. I was stuck in travels I didn't park up to watch. Let me tell you about a traffic thing I found out this weekend Rob. Yeah go on. Because we went to West Midland Safari Park. Yes.

And we had, I'll tell you or was it? Yeah, big time. Big time. But the reason I've got, I asked one of the people who work there, because you drive around the safari bit, yeah. Yeah. I said, does anyone ever get out? Because she was like, in in summer it can be quite slow because there's lots of cars. So, so we did it in about 40 minutes. Yeah, But they... The monkeys ripping the car upon? No, no. We did it about 40 minutes, but it can be three hours in summer, she said. Oh, because the... As long as Titanic. Why is that six episodes of East End of Josh?

I said, does anyone ever get out? And she said, yeah, people have got out to get a picnic out of the boot because they're hungry. I want to then bring back into the car. To bring back in the car. Not to like throw a blanket on the floor. No, no, no. And someone, people get out to have a piss in the lion's section. Why? Because they're desperate for a piss. And they'd, isn't that mental? In a field with lions in? The kind of thing my dad would have done. I think it's a different generation thing. It should be like, nah, it's he'll be all right.

How do you know? Yeah, he's more scared to me than I am. Yeah, they're fucking, they're basically big pets, they're domesticated. Yeah. He's never seen the Savannah. Anyway, shall I tell you about our trip to West Midland Safari Park? Yes, is it a good, is it good news or bad news? So the safari park, superb, because we were in Lodges, we were in Tiger Lodge. Okay. So I'd give you an idea. You literally wake up and you have a tiger walking past your window. Yeah, that's what I was going for. Sorry. No that's right.

So literally, that's cool. So this, I'll just send your picture. I can see what I can, it's weird in it now that I can just see where you sle. Oh my god. So the... There you go, it's a bed. looking at a window. No that's a bench, that's a bench. That's like a cushioned bench next the window that you can sit on. No, no, no, there's a bed facing a massive window on picture one. And a jacuzzi facing a window? Oh no, no, I've just sent you one as well, Rob. Okay, so I'm looking at, oh my god, so there, so there, so there, so there, so there, so there, so there, so there, so there, so there, so there, so there, so there, so there, so there, so there, so there, so there, so there, there, there, there, there, there's, there's, there's there's, there's there's there's there's, there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there, there's there, there's there, there's there, there's there, there's there, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there's, there's, there's there's a there's a there's a there's a there's a there's a there's a there's a there's a there's a there's a there's a there's a there's a there's a there's a there's a there's a there's you have a bedroom window as well looking at the time? Yeah we were upstairs though. We had a two floor, we were upstairs. Right. So you could

look out over the. Did you have an indoor jacuzzi looking at the tigers? No. We had a I don't know if I'd like that. Yeah, but do you know what? You could see the jacuz. the jacuzzi. You could see. their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah....... Yeah....................................... Yeah... Yeah. Yeah.. Yeah..... Yeah.. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.. the. the...... the.. the... the.. the. the. the.. the. the. the. the. the... You could see people in the jacuzzi. Well you couldn't see them in the jacuz. He's like the tigers looking in but can other lodges see you as well a bit? Yeah, I mean in the distance in the same way that you could see a window in a tower block. Do you know what I mean? There's no curtains. Well there is in your bedroom. Yeah, of course. the jacuzzi room. They might have been in the jacuzzi room. I don't know because I didn't have to... I'm not sure about jacuzzi indoors. Are you not? I think it's a bit of an outdoor thing, isn't it? Ah, you know.

If you were, would you want it outdoors with the tiger, I'd take me away from the election. Yeah, yeah, when they designed it, I think the wall was a good decision. So anyway, that was incredible. They've gone quite tiger-themed in the room as well. I sort of feel like, if you've got a window that looks out onto a real-life tiger, do you need a portrait of a tiger on the wall as well? The tigers everywhere. It was th. It was was was was for the ti. It was for ti. It was for ti. It was for ti. It was for ti. It was for ti. It was for ti. It was for ti. It was for ti-a. It was for ti-a. It was for ti-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-s. tiiii. tiia-s. Tia-s. Tia-s. Tia-tie-tiea-tiea-tiea-tiea-tiea-tiea-tiea-tiea-tiea-tiea-tiea-tiea-tiea on Friday. Nice. It takes a long time to stop in the services doesn't it? Yes, especially with kids. Especially when you've got a queue up to like park and then. Oh, yeah. I'm honore. Because you can tell how long it's taken by how much it affects

your approximate arrival time, whatever it's called. Your ETA? That's what's called. Yeah. It's more than half an hour just to to to to to go to go to go to go to go to go to to to go to to go to to to to to the to to the to the the to to the to the to the to to to to to the to to to to the the the the the the the the the their the their their their their their their the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the t. It's the the the ti. It's tip. It's to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. your ETA, that's what it's called. It's more than half an hour just to go for a piss, buy a tea, buy some food and leave. Also, we are experts at service stations because of that job. My trick is I'd pull into the actual petrol station bit because they've normally got a toilet so you can quickly go there again. But they haven't got enough food. This is my biggest issue at the moment Rob with life. The biggest issue with life okay I've watched the news excited to see what this is what's the big problem you know the cost of machines in the in the in the they are shit they're shit and they don't do tea tea. they're they don't they are they are they are they are they are they are shit. They are they're they're shit. They are they don't they don't they don't they don't they're shit. They're shit. They're shit. They're they don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't they don't they don't they're they're they're shit. They're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're. they're they're. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're. They're they're they're. They're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're the they're the their. their. they're their they're their. they're they're they're their. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're. they're. they're they don't do tea. It's coffee or bust. Yeah, I don't, I can't drink, I don't like those cars. I'd rather, also as well, West Midland's safari parts taking the piss, it's Wales.

Is it? It's so West. It's so... That shows me with my satna. I was like, I was like you driving to work. I didn't actually take it. Yeah, everyone's got west west west west west west west west west west west west west west west the the tha. tha. tha. thiiiii. thi. thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's th. It's th. th. th. th. I don't. I thi. I don't th. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't th. I can't th. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they's they's they's they're they're they're they're th. they're th. they're th. they're they're th. they're th. they're they're they're they're they're that. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're to work. I didn't actually take it. Yeah, everyone's got West Midlands accent. I don't know where they're putting it on. That's very, to me that is you're on the you're on the cusp of Wales there for me. Well there's nothing wrong with that. Well no I'm not but I'm just saying if you've got an issue with Wales Rob that's fine but it's fine but it's ki. It's thin. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that's the th. that's that's that's that's that's that's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. thooooooooooooooooooooooo. the. the. the. the. the like you're on the, you're on the cusp. It's a long way, all I'm saying. For my house, that's over three, that's three and a half hours. It was three hours 20 on the Friday.

Yeah. We left a bit early from school, got her out at two, boshed up the boat away, dealt with 30 to 40 minutes.ouch, he stopped me to tell me that he'd seen a band where the guitarist looked like me. And in the shops? He was like, he was like, you've got to, you've got to see this band and I thought I'm not here for a fucking musical. Um, do they work at a coffee shop? Because I want a cup of tea at this point and there's any machine. And he was like the guitarist looks exactly like you and his name is Tuba, T-U-B-A, something. But you can't Google Tuba guitarist because they're both instruments so it won't,

it won't come up Rob. So if anyone knows, if anyone knows who this guitarist called Tuba thatthat looks like, right? Well, his name's Tuba. Yeah, his first name's Tuba, Tuba Skinny. This is him. Who could you just say the guitarist from the band? Yeah, he did. I don't remember the name of the band. All right, okay, calm down. Let's not get, let's not lose our heads over this. Chuba Skinny! This is the first thing! Oh yeah! Chubuskinny, let's see if he looks like. That's the band.

What, Chuber Skinny? Yeah, because I remember they've been called Chubaskinny. Now we need to find the guitarist. Fucking out, I can't believe it's come up. Tuba skinny. Who are this little hip-s? Who is this guys look like me? No, I can't even see a guitar in Chuber Skinny, they're all got Tubas. None of them look like me.

None of them have got a guitar. Yeah, here we go. The guy at the back. Here we go. What's his name? He doesn't look like me, Rob. I still can't find the performance. Oh, right. I see it. I see it. Go on. Is it a little woman? Is it a little old woman on the guitar? Is that what he's having been? I think I don't think is... Is he doing a banter?

Well, it's a long-term payoff on his banter. He's doing well. He's getting some serious fucking airtime this bloke. Yeah. There there go. Chubeskinnit. We'll pop that on the Instagram. I mean. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th you th you th you th you th you're that that that thuuuuuuuber that that that that that that thi. Is he that that that that that that that that that that that that is that is that is that thi thi. Is he's thi. Is he thi. Is he th is he th is he th is he th is he th. Is he th. Is he th. Is he th. Is he th. Is he th. Is he th. Is he th. Is he th. Is he th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thii thiiii thiiii thiii thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th on the Instagram. I mean, not a lot like you. No. Not enough. Not enough. Not at all. So that happened. Then we get there. Yeah. Lodge, exciting.

It's obviously dark by now. So you're just, it's basically bedtime. Yeah. The kids are scared. My kids, I think would be scared if it was dark and they know the tigers on the other side. Well, wait for it, wait for it, Rob. So there's two bedrooms. There's the upstairs one that's got a couple of single beds and a bunk. And then there's the downstairs that's got a lovely double bed, a freestanding bath, looking out onto the, on to the tigers so upstairs not tigers you can't see the tigers really well you can you can see out onto the but you can't they're not walking eye level yeah you aren't getting

eye of the tigera so they pop in um well there is giraffe lodges and they have gone upstares they have gone upstairs I don't know why that made me laugh. But anyway, I'm just the planning meeting, right, what we can do, we've got giraffe, giraffe lod, upstairs window, absolutely for the giraffe rod. No need for a downstairs. Cut a long story short, Rob. What are you looking at? I can see you googling to googling to the giraffe, sorry. I'll stop. Your glasses light up when you google.

Sorry, sorry, go on. No, it's all right. Carry on. So anyway, lovely, double bed, freestanding bath for the grown-ups downstairs. Yeah. Little guess where I end up sleeping? Not in the bunk. Why are you in the grown-ups downstairs. Yeah. Little guess where I end up sleeping? Not in the bunk. In the bunk. In the bunk. In the fucking bunk, Rob. Tell me where everyone is, Rose.

So she's in Cormel. You're up there on your own again. So my son has got, my son's in the cot. The travel cot. So it's movable, the travel cot. We decide he can go upstairs with my daughter wants to sleep in the bunk. Right, and then my son in the cot downstairs below the bunk. Right, so in the bunk upstairs is you in one bunk, your daughter no, no, no. My daughter's going in the trauke. Right, okay. My son's going in the travel cot. Next to the bunk. tununkunkunk bunk bunk bunk bunk bunk bunk bunk bunk, the bunk, the bunk, the bunk, the bunk, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, togogue, the, thea, togot, togot, togot, tog, togu. tog, tog, tog, the tog, tog, the tog, tog, tog, tog, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to t, togue, togue, togue, toge, the, the, thea, thea, thea, the thea, thea, thea, thea, thea, thea, thea, thea, thea, thea, todato the bunk. Next to the bunk, and then we're gonna go downstairs. Yeah.

Yeah, that's classic. Okay, get him in the travel cot. Don't know if you remember when we went to stay at Rose's dad. He fucking hates travel cots. Yeah. So we were so ahead of schedule. incredible. This is the best we've ever done. We had 40 minutes of the night before's episode of the Traders to watch before that night's episode of the Traders. Right, so you're basically get him up and then you can watch a traitors. Also, you're away so you've got a time

limit. You can't, there's no no no, no, no, no. They've got everything in there. They've got Netflix. What a wayto the lodge and you've got six jacuzzi you've got you've got you've got cameras onto the different animal parks as well so you can watch the animals in the morning feels like a bit of a lodge for a pervert in the jacuzzi TV sorry if the tigers weren't wearing the elephant, you freak. Rob, you're cruising around the school counting girls legs earlier. I didn't count their legs. He counts legs. I'm, well I work with two of them. Um, anyway, sorry Josh Go on. You're getting them to bed early. You're doing well at the stage. Yeah. He won't go down in the car, wrong. Refusal. Pure fury. Does he climb out? No, he can't climb out but you can scream. And we've got no option at this stage. It took a hour and a half of screaming to get him down,

going in and out the room, in the room, trying different things. And is your daughter asleep on the bed at this point? No, she can't sleep because he's screaming. And she's just up watching you do this. Yeah. There was a particularly low moment when we were downstairs and we were trying, leaving him, because we tried sitting, we try to leave. Have you, have you sworn in front of your daughter? Yes. A lot of fucking ills under our breath there sometimes, and they tell us off now. She picked, it's the first time she said, what does that mean? Oh, what did you say? She said, what does, I was ranting at rose about how it was going? She said, what does fucking mental mean? What did you say?

I shouldn't have said that. That's a bad word. That's a bad word, yeah. But it was a stressful situation all in. Yeah, and also there's a tiger watching you. Yeah, this is fucking mental in a way. It's all mental. I'm three yards from a tiger and my main concern is my child isn't sleeping in a travel cot. We're basically in a tiger enclosure for the night separated by safety glass so yeah have a Kip get your head there. Don't worry about that apex predator patrol in the phone. So anyway we finally get him down. My daughter goes up to the bunk doesn't like it. No. So she goes I'll sleep on one

of the beds and we't like it. No. So she goes, I'll sleep on one of the beds. And we're like, we'll sleep downstairs. She's like, I'm quite scared in this place I don't know. Without you two even on the same floor, fair play. Yeah. Fair point, you're a tiger. If brother's been screaming for 90 minutes. Yeah. So Rose is like, well, I'll the other. th. th. th. th. thozy. th. th. th. th. th. th. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. to, to, to, to, that. to, to, to, to to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. I's, to. to. I's, to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. the the the the the the the toe. the the the the the the tooooooooe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. bed. Yeah. I'm like, yeah. So then it's, oh I'm just going to be downstairs

on my own. Perfect. Double bed, yeah. No, Rob, I didn't want to be downstairs on my own. Why? I was like it feels a bit lonely, it feels a bit sad, just being downstairs on my own. Sounds fucking great. I'd have been down there like a shit off a shovel straight in tucked out starfish. Obviously I would have to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to be to be to be down. Do to be down. Do to be to be down down to be down to be down to be down down down. to be to be the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to be the to be the to be down down down. Do the the the the the the the the the the the to be down. Do the the to be down. Do to be down. Do to be down. Do to be down. Do you. Do you. Do you. Do you. Do you to to to be down. Do to the the thou. Do to be down. Do the the the the the to be a shit off a shovel straight in tucked out starfish. Obviously I would have gone Lou, do you want me to stay? We'll do a night on night off. That's what Rose suggested. Yeah. And then both, I said, all right, do you want to sleep down there tonight?

And she was like, no. And I didn't want to sleep down there tonight either. It sounds scared. It was a bit, it's not scared, but... I don't want to wake up to a tiger at the window when I'm on my own. You used to when you were drinking? So, there we go. So you stepped on a bunk bed rather on a double bed on your own. You're mental, you're mental, you're... That's fucking mental mate. Rose made the same decision though I was on the bunk both nights. So what about the second night? Did Rose go down? No, I was on the bunk again. So you said there was a spare double bed for two nights downstairs? Yeah. We then, with a bath. I don't know why he didn't do a night each. Because neither of us wanted to sleep downstairs.

Why? Because you don't want to be on your own. Don't you? I didn't really fancy it, no. No, me and Lou stayed over in a hotel in a hotel in, and we had, we got a hotel room with two double beds in, one for me and the girls, right? And we were staying near our friends over in Ascotway, and then one of the nights said, well, why don't we let the girls for a sleepover?

And then you two can have a hotel room to yourself. We slept to sleep at bed that night. Well, seven minutes, for seven minutes, for seven minutes, three and a half. And then we just enjoy spreading it on double bed. Are you going to be one of those couples that has separate beds when you're older? No, but if I was on holiday and there was an empty double bed and the kids were happy because one of the parents was with them, I'd have a night each in the double bed. Are you about to have a drink? What is this, Robinson's? What the fuck you do? What the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the f. the f. Are the f. Are the f. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. Are th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha bed. Are you about, Rob? I'm about to have a drink.

What is this, Robinson's? What the fuck you doing playing at Wimbledon? Like, how much Robinson's have you got? Well, it was basically, I've got the big, you know, like the big family ones, and there was a little bit of the bottom, so I just dilute it bit, my little treats myself is, I fill it out with water to the top, then that's my juice for the day. You're juice for the day, you sad, oh. All right, top bunk. Top bunk. I'm in a top bunk, you're drinking Robinson's as your treat for the day. I'm in a top bunk, so you went around the safari on the when you got there or the next day?

Oh we uh yeah yeah we went and we went to a sea lion show. That was great. Fair enough. And then we did the safari and also uh, oh Rob, I put a cockroach on my hand. told me. I had to to the the their. their. to the to to the to to to the the to the to to the the the the to to the the the to the the their. their their their their their to their their their to their their their to to to to to toe. So. So. So. So. So. So. I to. So. I to. So. So. I. So. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the the the the the the the th. I th. th. I t. t. t. t. too. t. t. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. little thing with like the little animals and my, yeah, thought she didn't want to put the cockroach on her hand. I had to step up and prove I was manly. Yeah. Um, did Rose do it? No, she wouldn't do it. See, look, that's your, so Lou, one thing I'd say about Lou is a feminist. So when there's our key furniture to furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture furniture to to to to to to to to to to to the to collect to collect the the to to the coe to the coe. I the coe. I to the coo the coo the coo to the coe. I'm to put to put to put to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the co. I the coo. I tho. I tho. I tho. I tho. I tho. I'm thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo to to to to to to to to to to to tho. I in the house because Lou's a feminist and I'm a feminist so when there's our key of furniture to be built or spiders to collect Lou does it to

show you the girls. Rose will do collecting the um... what about spiders? That's not to show the... that's not to show Pearl. That's just because um because I'm scared. Well no because I sort of basically bullied Lou into it really because I always have to get the spiders because I sort of basically bullied Lou into it really in a way because I always have to get the spiders or any sort of creepy crawlies and I don't really like them but after why you just get used to them because you have to do them. And I went, well Lou, our girls are just going to be sort of two screaming girls, stereotypical screaming girl and there's no reason why a girl can't pick up a spider.

It's old stereotypes, so you're going to have to start doing the spiders. So Lou does the spiders now. She hates it, but she does it to prove a point. So I didn't know if Rose, if now... No, Rose is fine with it, but she didn't want to do the cockroach. Didn't want to do the cockroach. When the cockroach, I was a good time but slept in a bunk bed. Yeah, I know. I mean that's night.

I just, yeah, I feel like you missed. Take that. I felt like you could not eat a night to do it. Do you know what? Did the full drive home? Yeah. I was fucking. .

. . Three hours 20. Oh that's good with kids, well they not need a wheel or anything. No. Oh, by the way, yeah. My son slept through the safari drive-round. Look at this, Rob. Oh my god, have you got a new car? No, no, we were driven around. What's going to say? I was sorry, I didn't realize you're a millionaire from 1982. Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha! H. I that's no way that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's that's that's th, th, that's that's th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. that, that, that, that, that, that, th with a full Beijing area. We got the drive-round experience. There's no way that's his car. No. That's like a yacht.

That's amazing. It was a land driver. Yeah, see, I was going to say, it's a big landover. That's amazing, seeing the drafts like that. Yeah, imagine that. He looks proper tuckered out as well. So we had to, a bit of a, you want a pilava, it was fine, it was Lou's sister's 30th birthday. Yeah.

So they went for a lovely roast dinner over in East London, which is about an hour from our house drive. Yeah, it's not too bad and it's a birthday. But it was on a Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday Sunday. three o'clock which is like such a brutal time when you've got kids because it's like that's when you're winding down you're sorting out homework packing school bags and stuff like that anyway so we're driving back so I'm driving back about seven off seven and that's getting a bit late because we're gonna be a getting back till quarter so eight and then the type that goes we're tired so I said like if you want to to the to the to to to to to to to to to to to the to to the to the the to to the to to to to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the toldld. I. I told. I was. I was. I'm drive if you want to have a sleep you can have a sleep and then when we get back we get put it to bed and they went all right so we put some

calming music on so I put on like acousticy music it's weird if you ask the that your phone for calming music it all sometimes it plays sort of like music if you're on ketamine in a bifah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And all that was, and anyway, they were like, no we don't, we want. They're like listening to meditation spa music, which is proper relax. Love it, right? Lou listens to it sometimes in bed. Anyway, so I put it on. I'm driving on the M25 because that's the only way back down south.

And it's like, proper, like, I'm in the world's best spa this music right it's unbelievable yeah anyway the girls start nodding off lose fallen asleep and I'm like give me a fighting chance people I was like no she was like oh is it's the music too much when it is if you're asleep but if you talk to me I'm just gonna go off a bridge here like I can't there's no way it's dark it's cold I've been around up all day doing all sorts I'm glad it's dark, it's cold, I've been around up all day doing all sorts. I'm glad you brought this up Rob. The, the etiquette of being the other grown-up. In the cut, I think, because if I'm driving on my own, it's fine because I can just put on what I want on the stereo and it's totally fine and it's totally, like a podcast so I would normally, I'm a lot of child suitable, not even loose

suitable, because you know something a bit of shame of what you listen to sometimes. It's just normally other blokes like you giggling and she's like, oh this is crap. Yeah, well yeah, but I'm not having a go of your van the Pumps podcast you're listening to her right? We have things. But you can't even put that on so then you just put on this boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring boring you just put on his boring music. So the way I drove, when I drove, drove to West Midlands, Rose had stuff to do on her phone. Yeah. So basically it was three and a half hours driving solo. She was dealing with the kids. Yeah. But we were listening to their iPads and then occasionally the five Juleepa songs that my daughter all listened to because they're in the top five. I couldn't they they they they they they th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. th. th. tho. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. So, tho. So, tho. So, tho. So, tho. So, tho. So, tho. So, thooooooooooooooooooooooo. So, the. So, tho. will listen to because they're in the top five. I couldn't, I couldn't drive. They don't like their iPads when we're driving anyway. It makes it feel sick. They were sick. Yeah. So they just don't have their iPads when we're driving.

They just go they're their iPads. They just go to their iPads. they're their kids go to. Yeah. But. But, but, but, but, but, but, they, they, they, they, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's they make it, it's they make it's, it's, it's they make it's makes it's, it's makes it's makes it's makes it's makes it's makes it's. It makes it's. It makes it's. It makes it's. It makes it's. It makes it's. It makes it's. It makes. It makes. It makes. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. they they they they they're they're their. they're their. their. they'll they'll their. they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're do we lost my daughter's headphones and they turned up yesterday? So next time, when we're going away. It's hard to put headphones on a younger one. They just frown off. Oh yeah, he can't have the headphones. Also they just realize when you're on the motorway, if they just throw their headphones on the floor, they're down after their headphones, their headphones, thapapapapapapapapapapapapap.. Have I shown you how dirty our car got in that journey? Yeah, I saw on Instagram is disgusting. It's fucking mental.

It's because I have something, I feel like, I'm just like throwing crisps behind me. Yeah. Like instead of a wedding, you know when you throw confetti? Just throwing crisps and open their mouth. Did you, did they sleep when you got back? Was that a... They didn't really go sleep. They they they they to sleep, they sort of just rested their eyes for a bit. And then by the time we found the right spa music, they were, we were nearly home and then the roads, because they sleep on the motorway, but when it's like round town, like

they wake up. And then we got back, gave me some beans on to their sapea they went to sleep pretty well. to to to to to to their their their their to sleep pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty well actually actually actually actually actually actually actually actually actually that's that's that's to to to to to to to to to to to their their their to to to to to to to to to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the. the. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. their their their their their their their their their their to entertain you on a long drive. Entertaining if you've got kids, kids. I'm not entertained but at least be engaged. Yeah, acknowledge I'm there. Because I thought Rose did a good job considering she was basically had to do all this stuff on her phone. Because obviously you can see what they're looking at on her phone. So I could see she was doing stuff that was important. So she was sorting out stuff for the Cornwall house. I, kids, kids, kids, kids, because, th, because, th, because, th, th, because, I, I, I, I, because, I, because, I, because, I, I, I, because, I, I, because, because, because, I, I, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, I, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the th.. I the the the the the the the the the th. I their, their, I their, I'd their, I'd their, I'd their, I'd to their, I'd to to to to th. to, I'm not, I'm not, to to to that was important. Yeah. So she was sorting out stuff for the Cornwall House. I could see her doing that. If I turn and she's looking at Instagram. Yeah, no, I'm not. Luzzi. Luzzi. I'm like waiving thrown. I'm like, no, that's not okay. But if it's like daytime and I'm not tired. If it's like, if it's like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, I's like, I's like, I'm, I'm, th. th. I'm, th. I'm, th. I'm, th. I'm, th. I'm like, on a bit more of a PG podcast or it's a music I like. Yeah, yeah, yeah. To keep flicking through

the different songs. Get this, when my son was struggling to sleep in the travel cot and Rose was in the room and he was getting there, she was obviously on Instagram secretly and one the loud videos played. It's too risky to go on Instagram these days. It's too risky to go on Instagram these days. It's too risky if you're trying to cause a sleep situation. Well, you know, it does, because I swear, I'll turn it down and it just absolutely booms out. And also as well, sometimes if you go on Instagram or TikTok,

that controls your audio. That controls the tod, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. I, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, too, thi, too, too, too, is, is, is, is, is to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. It's, is, is, is, is th. It, is, is th. It, is th. It, is th. It, is th. It, is thi. It, is thi. It's, is thi. It's, is too, too, too, too, the too. It's too. It's too. It's too. It's too. It's too. It's too. It's too. It's then all of a sudden she goes on TikTok it just the music turns off in the car. Absolutely lottery. This I know this I know this every day I don't know if I mentioned this to you. You know it snowed to a little day I don't know if I mentioned this to you. You know it's tiny bit of snow frost on the next morning there was a tiny little bit on my life but it was more like frost, tiny bit of snow frost on the car. He'd drive along and then it's geys to turn the corner there must have been six inches of snow in his car and I thought where the fucks he come from? Because like nowhere else is that there's always when this stows a bit we'll be driving along and it's just one fucking he's just from the North Pole. How are you with frost on your windscreen in the morning, Rob? It does my head. So this is the best thing about where we've moved to and we didn't even think would be.

Our little car, we've got a garage, the little car goes in the garage. It's never frosted. It is the greatest thing about winter for us now is that the school run we just get straight in and it's not even cold or getting him in the car because it's in the garage is like a warm temperature. Get them in, no defrosting straight out on the road. Amazing. However, for me, in my car, that's out to the elements and I just basically get a big coat on and will you out and sitting it into it clears. Do you? Yeah but you can't do that with kids but on your own I do I just sort of go do you know what I'm just gonna get in a car five minutes earlier and just turn it on and sit there and just try to the good news is that spa the the good news is that's spa the the good news the the the the good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their so so so so so so I I I I I I I they. they. they. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the me and we will sit downstairs and have a glass of wine trying to watch like, perform me once on Netflix and you hear.

Yeah. Money, money, money. My husband's been honey. Awful. Awful. So now we've got a spa music, which is good. Oh, my daughter went to, I got invited to this pottery painting thing with a friend and a couple of mates. Yeah. So I picked her up from the parents, they drove them back and they're very lovely, both both doctors, very, very, yeah, like well-to-do, well-spoken, well-educated. Oh yeah, they've been lovely, don't worry,

thank you very like, nice, just lovely people. And I was like, okay, how was it? All good. Oh, Oh, yeah, something to to to to to to to to to to to to to they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, the, they, they, the, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, th. th. th. th. th. Both, both, both, both both both both both both both both both both both both both both both both both both both both both both both both both both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thoo. tho. tho. tho. th. th. good like that. Oh yeah, just something to mention about her, about my daughters, about her, the things she painted. Just a little bit off-send, I was like, oh God, what was she done? She's written something on it. And I was like, well, what did they do then? She's like, I went for all the kids, went all, that her daughter did a sloth, hanging down. It's like, you pick, you, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, the, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, a, a, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, their, their, their, their, their, their, things, uh, uh, things, uh, uh, things, uh, things, uh, things, uh, things, uh, things, uh, their, uh, uh, their, pick a thing like there's about 20 things you can pick and then you paint them then they put them in the firing thing and then they yeah they come out all nice. One of them did a soft one them did a heart one and I went oh yes she did a dog I was like okay I mean yeah but the dog was sort of the dog and then just covered its ass in brown paint to look like shit. Chiff off the old block.

Chiff off the old block. So she's just done a dog that's covered in shit, right? Yeah. And then they come home that night. The youngest one's a bit more like, ah, but the, yeah, the older ones are quieter, but very sort of just does random stuff. So I think she had an Ella packet the other day. She still hasn't like raspberry, Ella packet things.

You know, they've got the twitter silly thing and it's like a little tube. So she was blowing in it like that and then pushing it over the hands. Like that. So she was squeezing it and pushing it and pushing it and pushing it and pushing it into it. you watch someone as a panic attack with a brown bag. Yeah, yeah. What are you doing? She went, I'm seeing if what's stronger, my hands are my mouth. So she was blowing in and trying to like, into a resistance. Oh, this is weird. Talk about panic attack. I had a panic attack on the dog walk, Josh. I've had a panic attack for ages. And I felt. Why did you have a panic a panic attack on a dog walk? So basically I once, I remember once when I was a kid, I, there was this where we used to live, there was a gate you could cut through but only the people that lived down that road had a key to the gate. So, yeah. I didn't have a key to the gate but

sometimes it'd be left open so I tried to go down it, but it was lots and I sort of didn't cut through and then there was this little dog that behind a gate fence thing I could see it was barking at me and it's only a tiny little dog but I got I got petrified and started crying and got really upset until eventually someone from the, you know, someone someone comes through and let me through. So that's probably where it's from it's sort of like a little panic. Any time you have a panic normally it's associated some sort of traumaer from you're either aware of or not and it can be horrendous trauma of abuse or it can be your trousers fell down in pee and everyone saw your willy or or something like you got scared by a dog or someone jumped out on you wearing something and then that's what scares you anyway so I think that's where it stems from so anyway but like move most things I've got dogs now and I try and whatever it is that culled the th is th is th is th also th is th th is the cause th th the cause the cause th th th the cause th th th th th th the th of thus th of thus thus thus thus thus tho thoes thoes tho thus the thoes tho-I tho-I tho-I tho-I their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th of th of th of thus thoes troes troes troes true true true true true true trou-I true true true true true true true true true true cause that I sort of try and take it

head on because that old stoic thing of what's in the way is the way if you want to not be scared of dogs get a dog if you want to not be you just have to do it anyway so I've got so because the youngest one's still a puppy he's really well trained but still super excited wants to play with all the other dogs, which sometimes can be a bit hard work because you can't really get around. Anyway, I was on this dog walk and it was the busiest it's ever been. Normally, there's no one, I walked down this through the forest and there's no one there. But this time I looked down and I just saw, you know, when you leave a football match, and there's like of dogs everywhere and mine was running off then other ones come like that and also as well people stop them when I have a chat and stuff like that but sometimes it can get a overwhelming when it's sort of non-stopping and trying to catch the dogs and I so couldn't do it.

And I so couldn't do it and I just sort of getting really lead and took them back, but it was so weird because it just came out of nowhere, it was just too many people, too many dogs and too much going on and I just got overwhelmed and I was like, and I just have to get out of here basically and just go up. But it was really because it was sort of like, that's never, that's like, that's like to be my calm dog walk in the mornings but but what was weird was it weren't like I've been under lots of pressure and I'm stressed and I feel like at the moment my work's quite quiet and I feel really quite oh is that worrying you no not really but I think it's nice true are you worried that you're not actually okay and something's gonna to go wrong.

But anyway, I just thought in the spirit of sharing on this podcast, I do think though as well, January is a depressive month and quite overwhelming because it is basically the king of to-do list month and it. It's like, I'm gonna get fit, gonna lose weight, gonna stopthat, this year I think there's a lot of pressure this time of year. Totally. But yeah, I was just like, fuck this, I just went home, I just went home I thought it's I'll come back when it's quieter, it's too much. But yeah, it came out of nowhere. And then your dog sat there the model of it. No, but the dog did, tell you the dog did the other dog, the other the other the other the other the other tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tod, to, tod, tod, tod, told, told, told, told, told, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I. toy, I. toy, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, was, I was, I was, I was, toy. toy. tot. tot. tot. tot. tot. tot. to. tot. totally for three hours so it was sat there for three hours we've got underfloor heating the smell it is it went straight into my top three were smells was it was was it was a honey shit no it was just diarrhea so it was just because it was

just upset his stomach it was just oh my god and because it was not thick like a pancake it was just spread out like a pancake it was just bubbling up. They hit the floors and it was and we had friends as well that came around after like we've been some with our friends and they came around and that we walked in and that we had to stand outside for a bit while we heard it. Oh God. So bad. Don't let your dog eat honey. Small business shout out. Oh I've th. I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, the. Oh, the. Oh, thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, to a small business shout out. Oh, I've got one, you know we're allowed to do ones from just our life.

Yeah, we are allowed to do them. I went to a restaurant called Kaizen, K-A-I, ZN, right? Because we like, the girls like, I love Japanese food, the girls like sushi, but like just the ones with like cucumber in the and we normally go yo sushi but then I end up eating just like the top of salmon and they eat rice and it costs way too much and there's in Bromley the Glades and I never thought I'd say this is an amazing restaurant inside a shopping center called Kaizen and it was just really nice food the really nice with a kid's menu pens pencils coloring and stuff and stuff like that but if you want really good Japanese food, Bromley the Glades, Kaisen, get yourself in there. They're on

yesterday. Do you know what? Obviously we do, I'm about to do on the scent in, it's nice when we do our own because it shows that we've... And it's a small business, it's not like a big chain. He's got his what Gizaa from East London, he's got his, fair and Mango Tree which is like really fancy expensive restaurants and this is his own thing. It can't be called Novichok can it? Something like that. It's a fact it's like a really but this one isn't fan I mean it's not cheap. Novochock was what they they killed those people within Salisbury Rock yeah yeah and let's not bring the mood down, mate. Well, you called the fucking West restaurant. It's called Novichok, isn't it? It can't be. Well, now we're not doing a sport. It's a deadly nerve agent.

You should see the dessert. It's called Novikov. Right. Novikov in Mayfair. There's a lovely little boutique called Anthrax, get yourself down there for some lovely lovely sugar doughnuts. No, yeah, so sorry, yeah. But anyway, he used to run that place, which is a fancy restaurant and it does really good Japanese food.

It's fairly priced, but the food's amazing and it's a small business in Bromley, so go to not, no, no, go to Kaizen in the Glades. Don't eat Novichok. Do no. Do no. Do no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, to, to, to, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, to, to, to, to, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, don't go to Kaizen in the Glades as my school business shout out. Do not eat Novichok. Do not eat Novichok. Hi Rob, Josh and Michael. Please can you give a shout-out to mate Andy who set up a not-for-profit community interest business called Game Day Vision. Andy is severely visually impaired and a massive football fan decide to set up game day vision to make football and other live events accessible to visually impaired people. Often stadiums and menus are accessible for visually impaired people with the biggest barriers being getting to and from the venue. The aim of game day vision is to

recruit volunteers to support people to not only enjoy events but to travel to and from them as well. We're based in Essex but have ambitions to expand much wider. It's very early days to the organization as we start to apply for grant funding and raise our social media profile. So a shout out would massively help. We can be found on Facebook and Instagram by face searching game day vision CIC. Keep it sexy and relatable George Martin. Presumably not the Beatles producer. Big up George Martin. Oh I've just got Kaizen. KKa. Bromley. I to to to to to to to to to to the to the organization to the organization the organization to the organization the organization the organization to the organization the organization the organization the organization the organization the organization. I the organization. I the organization. I the organization. I to to to to to to the organization. I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the organization. the organization. the organization. the organization. the organization. the organization. the organization. the organization. the organization. the organization. the game. the game. I the game. I the game. I the game. I the game. I the game. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. G. I. I. I. I. G. I. I. I. I. I. G. I. I. G. I. I. I. G. I. I.. Big up George Martin. I've just got Kisen.Bromley on Instagram if you want to see what they do. There we go. KKP, I, Z, E, N. By the way, they didn't give me any free food, this is all just, I paid and

just enjoyed it and want to share. Right, Josh, oh God, talking of food, pizza express. My kids are on the fuctuckadul adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult adult th. th. thi pizza, thi pizza, thi pizza, thi pizza, thi pizza, thi, thi, the thi, not Romana yet just normal classic but they had I went there and I was in there for ages because my daughter ate a kid's doughballs and a kid's pizza they went I'm hungry can I have it again she did it twice. I was in there for 90 minutes Josh I'm has ever been in Peter for 90 minutes Robbush. Rob Friday Romash. Yes we got Romash. Yes, we got Romash, big up Romash. Third time back, he? Shall we say what we're doing with him? Oh yeah, that's exciting, yeah, yeah, we're, we've got, yeah, you tell him, Josh. We've got his wife, Lisa, to answer some, some Mr and Mrs style questions, haven't we? Yeah, we've got her answers. So we've got them and we'll be doing that with Romeshish, that with Romesh that with that with that with Romish, that with that with that with that with that with that with that with that with that with romish, that with that with that with that with that with thomish, thomish, thomish, thomish, thomish, thomish, thiomish, thiomish, thiomish, thiomomomomorrow thiomorrow thi, you're thi, you're th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. thi. thi. 't know. So we've got them and we'll be doing that with Romesh. He doesn't know on Friday.

Yes. Talking of small business shoutouts, he'll be promoting his arena tour. So we'll see you. We'll see you then. All right, bye. Here we go. Can't do it. So we're trying to do an advert for our, for Chatterbix. Hello, my name's Joe Wilkinson and I do a podcast with David Allen and it hasn't got a thing. Chatterbix is a podcast magazine and chat show, isn't it? We're on three times a week, we have loads of guests, special guests, Natalie Cassid

is on regularly. Yeah, loads of people, loads of people. Andy Goldstein. Yeah. Okay, can I read some of the highlights? Yeah? Interviewing a Red Arrow pilot, chatting with Ricky Javace, Harry Hill, James Acaster and Catherine Ryan, amongst others. Visiting a haunted house, that was creepy. Being taught how to act by Martin Freeman. Backstage at the regular channels. Cheers. C-H-A-T-A-B-I-X Chattervix. Well done Joe. Thank you. That's our

promo. Goodbye. Yes!