Passion Struck with John R. Miles - 3 Ways to Unlock the Healing Power of Gratitude | EP 537

Episode Date: November 22, 2024

In this episode of Passion Struck, we explore the healing power of gratitude and how it can transform our lives, especially in times of loss and adversity. As we approach Thanksgiving, it's the perfect opportunity to reflect on how gratitude can shift our perspectives and foster resilience. Join us for personal stories, practical exercises, and insights that will help you cultivate intentional gratitude during this holiday season.Link to the full show notes:  https://passionstruck.com/3-ways-to-unlock-the-healing-power-of-gratitude/Call to Action: Don’t let life’s challenges overshadow the power of gratitude. Even in the toughest moments, gratitude can be your guide to resilience and healing. What’s one thing you’re thankful for today? Share it in the comments and take the first step toward transforming your mindset and unlocking the healing power of gratitude in your life. Let’s inspire each other!In this episode, you will learn:How practicing gratitude impacts brain function, activating reward centers and releasing dopamine to enhance well-being.The concept of neuroplasticity and how gratitude helps rewire the brain for resilience and positive thinking.How gratitude reduces stress by calming the amygdala, the part of the brain responsible for fear and anxiety.How gratitude can coexist with grief and help navigate life's toughest challenges.The role of gratitude in shifting focus from loss to the positive aspects of life, helping to find meaning even in adversity.How gratitude has evolved as a survival mechanism to foster cooperation and strengthen social bonds.Insights into the "Find, Remind, and Bind" theory and how gratitude helps build and sustain meaningful relationships.How small, intentional acts of gratitude can create long-term positive change in your mindset and relationships.Sponsors:Mint Mobile: Cut your wireless bill to 15 bucks a month at “MINT MOBILE dot com slash PASSION.”Hims: Start your journey to regrowing hair with Hims. Get your free online visit at hims.com/PASSIONSTRUCK.Quince: Discover luxury at affordable prices with Quince. Enjoy free shipping and 365-day returns at quince.com/PASSION.For more information on advertisers and promo codes, visit Passion Struck Deals.Join the Passion Struck Community! Sign up for the Live Intentionally newsletter, where I share exclusive content, actionable advice, and insights to help you ignite your purpose and live your most intentional life. Get access to practical exercises, inspiring stories, and tools designed to help you grow.  Learn more and sign up here.Speaking Engagements & Workshops Are you looking to inspire your team, organization, or audience to take intentional action in their lives and careers? I’m available for keynote speaking, workshops, and leadership training on topics such as intentional living, resilience, leadership, and personal growth. Let’s work together to create transformational change. Learn more at johnrmiles.com/speaking.Episode Starter Packs With over 500 episodes, it can be overwhelming to know where to start. We’ve curated Episode Starter Packs based on key themes like leadership, mental health, and personal growth, making it easier for you to dive into the topics you care about. Check them out at passionstruck.com/starterpacks.Catch More of Passion Struck:Check My solo episode on 5 Proven Ways to Overcome Emotional FatigueCatch My Episode with Naseem Rochette’s Brave Journey of Paying It ForwardWatch my interview with Jason Silver on How to Use What You Have to Get What You DesireCan't miss my episode with Susan Grau on How Our Life Experiences Shape Our SoulsMy solo episode on Rebuilding After a Hurricane: My Story of Loss and RecoveryIf you liked the show, please leave us a review—it only takes a moment and helps us reach more people! Don’t forget to include your Twitter or Instagram handle so we can thank you personally.How to Connect with John:Connect with John on Twitter at @John_RMiles and on Instagram at @John_R_Miles. Subscribe to our main YouTube Channel here and to our YouTube Clips Channel here. For more insights and resources, visit John’s website.Want to explore where you stand on the path to becoming Passion Struck? Take our 20-question quiz on Passionstruck.com and find out today! 

Coming up next on Passion Struck, have you ever wondered how gratitude can transform your life, especially in times of loss and adversity? In episode 537 of Passion Struck, we dive deep into the healing power of gratitude and explore how it can shift your perspective and foster resilience. Join me as I share personal stories and practical exercises that can help you cultivate intentional gratitude in your daily life. Welcome to Passion Struck. Hi, I'm your host, John R. Miles, and on the show we decipher the secrets, tips, and guidance of the world's most inspiring people and turn their wisdom into practical advice for you and those around you. Our mission is to help you unlock the power of intentionality so that you can become the best version of yourself.

If you're new to the show, I offer advice and answer listener questions on Fridays. We have long form interviews the rest of the week with guests ranging from astronauts to authors, CEOs, creators, innovators, scientists, military leaders, visionaries, and athletes. Now let's go out there and become passion struck. Hey, passion struck family. Welcome to episode 537 of the passion struck podcast. I am so grateful for each of you tuning in week after week,

bringing your energy, dedication and commitment to intentional living. It's this shared journey toward purpose and growth that makes our community so powerful. And if you're joining us for the first time, welcome. You've just stepped into a space dedicated to making meaningful change in every area of your life,

and we're thrilled to have you here. This week has been packed with incredible conversations. Earlier, I spoke with Glenn Phillips, the singer-songwriter and frontman of the iconic band Toad the White Sprocket. Glenn shared his powerful reflections on navigating loss, grief, and change, drawn from his own personal experiences. His insights in resilience and finding meaning through difficult transitions

are not to be missed. Then, Adrian Brambilla joined us to talk about the harsh truths of achieving financial freedom. Adrian's journey is nothing short of inspiring, from starting out as a backup dancer to tea-paying to becoming a self-made millionaire and financial educator. If you haven't already, I highly recommend going back to listen to these episodes. They're packed with insights that can help you live more intentionally, no matter where you are on your journey. For those diving into the podcast for the first time or looking for curated inspiration, check out our episode Starter Packs.

With over 530 episodes, we've curated playlists on themes like leadership, mental health, interviews with astronauts, and personal growth to make it easier to find your next favorite episode. Head over to passionstruck.com slash starter packs or explore them on Spotify. And don't forget, if you're looking for exclusive content and practical tools to apply these lessons to your life, sign up for my live intentionally newsletter. Each week I'll send you actionable insights to keep you inspired on your journey. Visit passionstruck.com to join. Plus, if you want to watch these episodes in a more visual format,

all our interviews, solo episodes, and highlights are available on our YouTube channel. Make sure to subscribe to stay updated on our latest content. Today's episode is deeply personal and powerful. Have you ever found yourself in a tough spot and wondered how some people manage to stay positive? How do they find strength to smile and express gratitude when everything seems to be going wrong? Today, we're diving into the healing power of gratitude and how it can truly transform

our lives, even during the hardest times. Gratitude isn't just something we say around the dinner table on Thanksgiving or after receiving a gift. It's a powerful tool that can reshape our outlook, help us cope with challenges, and even improve our health. The healing power of gratitude goes beyond just thinking happy thoughts. It's backed by science and can make a real difference in how we navigate life's ups and downs.

Imagine facing a moment when everything feels lost. Like standing in the wreckage of your own home, or saying goodbye to a loved one. In those moments, feeling grateful might seem impossible, but it's often in these darkest times that the healing power of gratitude can shine the brightest. Research shows that practicing gratitude can lower stress, improve sleep, and boost our overall well-being. More importantly, it helps us shift our focus from what we've lost to what we still have, from our pain to our strength, and from fear to hope.

So today, let's explore how embracing the healing power of gratitude can help us not just survive through tough times, but actually thrive. Whether you're dealing with loss, facing challenges, or just looking for a bit more of joy in your life. Understanding gratitude can be your key to unlocking resilience and finding unexpected happiness. Join me as we uncover how gratitude can transform our lives, even in the face of profound loss and adversity. Thank you for choosing Passionstruck and choosing me to be your host and guide on your journey we uncover how gratitude can transform our lives, even in the face of profound loss and

adversity. Thank you for choosing Passionstruck and choosing me to be your host and guide on your journey to creating an intentional life. Now let that journey begin. Life has a way of throwing unexpected challenges our way, and this year has been a testament to that. Just a few years ago, my life felt stable and full of promise. I was deeply engaged in my podcast, exploring the science of intentionality and helping others create lives of significance. My family

was healthy, my career was thriving, and I felt a sense of purpose in my work. Then came the first blow. My sister, my confidant and best friend was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. For several years, we fought alongside each other through her treatments, celebrating small victories and hoping for brighter days. This year, however, everything took a sudden turn for the worse. After a brief period of optimism with a new treatment trial, her condition deteriorated rapidly. I remember visiting her one last time. Just hours after I left her side, she passed away. The weight of that loss felt unbearable. And if that heartbreak wasn't enough, just four months later, Hurricane Helene struck our community unexpectedly.

My fiance and I had recently moved into our new home in June, expecting to build our lives together. We loved it and had just begun to call it our home. When the storm hit, in a matter of hours, we faced significant damage from flooding that left us feeling vulnerable and displaced. The emotional toll of these losses was overwhelming. Grief for my sister consumed my thoughts while the destruction of our home stripped away my sense of security. It felt like I was drowning in sorrow and uncertainty. I struggled to find hope or meaning amidst the chaos that surrounded me. There were days when simply getting out of bed felt like an insurmountable task. The future that had once seemed bright now felt shrouded in darkness.

I questioned everything, my purpose, my resilience, and even the messages of hope and intentionality that I shared with my listeners for years. In those moments of despair, the concept of the healing power of gratitude felt distant and almost unattainable. How could I possibly feel grateful when it seemed like my world was crumbling? The idea of finding something to be thankful for amidst such profound loss felt not just challenging but impossible. Yet it was during this crucible of adversity that I began to realize that embracing gratitude

could be my lifeline. As I stood at the crossroads of grief and chaos, I faced a choice to succumb to despair or to seek out moments of light amidst the darkness. Little did I know that this choice would lead me on a transformative journey, one that would reveal the true depth and strength found in the healing power of gratitude.

Became clear that even in my darkest moments, there were still glimmers of hope worth holding onto. As I stood at the crossroads of grief and uncertainty, I found myself in a quiet moment of reflection. One of those nights when the weight of everything felt almost unbearable. I kept thinking about the loss of my sister, and then something shifted. Instead of focusing solely on the pain of her absence, I started to reflect on the incredible

gift of having had her in my life for 50 years. 50 years of laughter, love, and countless memories. Those weren't just memories to mourn. They were moments to celebrate. I thought about the late night talks, the holidays we shared, and the way she shaped who I am today. That perspective changed everything. Suddenly, I wasn't just grieving her loss.

I was deeply grateful for all the time that we had together. The shift reminded me of a concept I explore in my book, Passionstruck, the power of both and thinking. So often in times of crisis, we feel like we have to choose between our emotions, joy or sorrow, hope or despair. But both and thinking allows us to hold two truths at once. I could feel the deep sadness of losing my sister and, at the same time, celebrate the incredible life we shared. That realization opened a path to

healing I hadn't expected. Then came another moment of clarity amidst the chaos of Hurricane Helene. While the floodwaters damaged our family home, I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude that no one had been hurt. That one thought, that gratitude, became a lifeline, helping me see beyond the immediate devastation and focus on what truly mattered. What I learned was this important lesson. Gratitude doesn't erase pain, but it gives us a way to navigate it. I'm going to repeat that because I think it is such a profound lesson. Gratitude doesn't erase pain, but it gives us a way to navigate it. By allowing both grief and gratitude to coexist, I found a way to honor my sister's memory and stay grounded through life's unpredictability.

It's not about forcing yourself to feel grateful when things are hard. It's about noticing the moments, even the small ones, that bright light into the darkness. As I leaned into gratitude during those difficult times, I became curious about why it was helping me find strength and clarity. What was it about this practice that allowed me to shift from despair to hope, even when my world felt like it was crumbling? This curiosity led me to explore the science behind gratitude, and what I discovered was transformative. Gratitude isn't just about being polite or saying thank you. It's so much more than that. It's a fundamental part of how we've survived and thrived as humans. Gratitude helps us form stronger bonds, build trust, and create meaningful connections, which are the foundation of thriving communities. When we express

the healing power of gratitude, we're doing something powerful. We're reinforcing relationships and laying the groundwork for mutual support and cooperation. Researchers like Robert Emmons and Michael McAuliffe explain gratitude as a two-step process. First, we recognize that we've received something positive. And second, we acknowledge the external source behind it. This acknowledgement creates a ripple effect, reinforcing relationships and encouraging more acts of kindness and support.

One fascinating framework is the find, remind, and bind theory. Gratitude helps us find allies, remind ourselves of their kindness, and bind us closer to them. This is how gratitude strengthens relationships and creates a sense of belonging, which is vital for emotional health and well-being. It's not just a human thing either. In the animal kingdom, we see behaviors like reciprocal altruism, helping others with the understanding that support may come back when needed. Scientists believe this instinct to repay generosity is a form of gratitude that has evolved over time to enhance survival.

Even young children show the beginnings of gratitude, learning as they grow how to express it fully and build stronger social connections. It's clear that gratitude is more than just an emotion. It's a tool for resilience, connection, and community strength. By understanding these evolutionary roots, we see why gratitude is such a fundamental part of the human experience. When we practice it, we're not just boosting our own well-being. We're contributing to stronger, more connected communities.

Next, let's explore how to harness the neuroscience of gratitude. Did you know that gratitude doesn't just make us feel good, it actually changes our brains? Here's what's fascinating. When we practice gratitude, we activate the brain's pleasure and reward centers, like the ventral tegmental area, or VTA, and the nucleus accumbens.

These areas release dopamine, the chemical that makes us feel good, boosting our overall sense of wellbeing. It's like giving your brain a natural happiness boost. And it doesn't stop there. Gratitude literally helps rewire our brains for resilience. This process called neuroplasticity strengthens the pathways that help us think more positively and regulate emotions. So every time you focus on what you're grateful for, you're training your brain to handle the challenges with more grace and optimism. It also helps calm our stress responses. People who practice gratitude show less activity in the

amygdala, the part of the brain that processes fear and stress. That means less anxiety and more emotional balance. And here's a bonus. Gratitude isn't just good for your brain, it's good for your body too. Research shows that grateful people report fewer physical symptoms, better sleep, and even healthier lifestyle choices. Think about it. When you're grateful, you're more likely to eat well, exercise, and take care of yourself. So gratitude isn't just a nice thing to have. It's a powerful tool for mental, emotional, and physical health. Armed with an understanding of how gratitude transforms our brains, strengthens our connections, and supports resilience, I began reflecting on how it shaped my own journey through moments of profound loss and hardship.

Gratitude didn't erase the pain of losing my sister or the devastation caused by Hurricane Helene. Instead, it offered me a way to navigate those challenges by shifting my focus from what I had lost to what I still held close. In the aftermath of these events, I found solace in the cherished memories of my sister, the laughter we shared, the lessons she taught me, and the love she left behind. Amid the destruction of our home, I clung to gratitude for our safety and the community that rallied around us. These moments became my anchors, helping me find clarity and purpose, even when

everything felt uncertain. This experience brought the science of gratitude to life. It rewired my perspective, reminding me that gratitude doesn't deny pain. It coexists with it, offering a way to find light in the darkness. As Thanksgiving approaches, a time when we're invited to reflect on our blessings, I encourage you to embrace gratitude

as a tool not just for celebration, but for resilience. Thanksgiving reminds us to pause and recognize these moments of light, even in the midst of life's storms. It's an opportunity to cultivate gratitude intentionally to acknowledge both the gifts we've been given and the people who enrich our lives. So whether you're gathering with loved ones, reflecting on the year, or seeking solace during a difficult season, these three simple exercises can help you enhance your well-being and deepen your connections during this meaningful time. One impactful way to express gratitude is through

writing a gratitude letter. This exercise not only allows you to articulate your appreciation for someone special in your life, but also has profound psychological benefits. So here are your instructions. Choose your recipient. Think of someone who has significantly impacted your life. This could be a friend, family member, mentor, or even a colleague. Write from the heart. In your letter, detail specific ways this person has influenced you positively. Share how their actions made you feel and their lasting impact that they've had on your life.

If possible, then deliver this letter in person or read it aloud during a conversation. This personal touch can deepen your connection and amplify the emotional experience for both of you. Research shows that writing gratitude letters can significantly boost your mood and overall mental health. Participants often report feeling happier and more connected to others long after completing the exercise.

Engaging in this practice during Thanksgiving can enhance your sense of community and belonging, reinforcing the healing power of gratitude. Another powerful exercise is the Three Good Things Ritual. Each night before bed, write down three things that went well during your day and reflect on why they happened. These can be small moments of joy, accomplishments, or interactions that brought you happiness. Studies have demonstrated that regularly engaging in the Three Good Things Ritual leads to increased levels of happiness and decreased symptoms of depression over time. By shifting your focus from negativity to positivity, you train your brain to recognize

and appreciate the good in your life. So here are some tips to making it a sustainable habit. Keep a dedicated journal. Use a special notebook or digital app to record your entries consistently. Set a reminder. Establish a nightly routine by setting an alarm on your phone as a gentle prompt. Share it with others.

Consider sharing your three good things with a partner or friend each night. This not only reinforces the practice, but also strengthens your relationships through shared positivity. And the third thing that you can practice to improve gratitude in your life is to consider incorporating

gratitude meditation or prayer into your routine. This practice allows you to center yourself and focus on what you are thankful for. So here's a guide for the practice. Find a quiet space where you can sit comfortably. Close your eyes and take several deep breaths. Begin by reflecting on specific people or experiences that you're grateful for. Visualize these moments or individuals and allow feelings of appreciation to wash over you. You can also incorporate affirmations like,

I am grateful for, followed by what comes to mind. Gratitude meditation calms the mind and reinforces positive emotions during challenging times. It serves as a reminder of the good amidst adversity, an essential aspect of harnessing the healing power of gratitude. Dedicating time each day to reflect on what we are thankful for, we cultivate resilience and foster a more positive outlook. By understanding the evolutionary roots of gratitude, harnessing its neuroscience, and implementing intentional practices into our daily lives, we can cultivate a mindset that enhances our personal resilience while strengthening our relationships with others. As we embrace these action steps centered around the healing

power of gratitude, we unlock its transformative potential, allowing it to guide us through life's challenges with hope and grace. As we conclude our exploration of the healing power of gratitude, it's clear that this simple yet profound practice has the ability to transform our lives. Gratitude is not merely an emotion. It's a powerful tool that can shift our perspective, enhance our relationships, and foster resilience in the face of life's challenges. This reminds me of one of my favorite quotes. Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has many,

not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some. These words from Charles Dickens resonate deeply with me as I reflect on my journey. I remember the initial struggle with loss and adversity, the heartbreak of losing my sister, and the unexpected devastation of Hurricane Helene. In those moments, the weight of grief felt insurmountable. But through that pain, I found an epiphany. Gratitude can bloom, even in the harshest storms. By shifting my focus from what I had lost to what I still held close, cherished moments with my sister, the unyielding love of my family, and the safety we found amid the chaos, I discovered a path to hope and healing I never thought possible.

The shift didn't erase the pain, but transformed it, offering a sense of wholeness in the face of what seemed broken. It's a lesson I carry forward, a reminder to pause, reflect, and let gratitude illuminate even the darkest days. So here's your challenge. As you go about your week, I encourage you to actively seek out moments of gratitude. What small things can you appreciate each day? How can you express that gratitude to others?

Perhaps through a letter or a simple conversation. Reflect on how these acts not only uplift your spirit, but also strengthen your connections with those around you. To support you on this journey, I'm excited to offer a free downloadable guide, the 7-Day Gratitude Challenge. This guide, especially useful during Thanksgiving, includes daily prompts and exercises designed to help you integrate gratitude into your life in meaningful ways. You can find it on my website at passionstruck.com, along with more resources and information about my podcast, Passion Struck. You can also find it in the show notes for this episode. If today's episode

resonated with you, please take a moment to leave a five-star rating and review. It truly helps us reach more listeners with stories of transformation and inspiration. And the best way to support the show? Share it with someone who may need a reminder of the power within them to rebuild, find purpose, and create a life that matters. I'm also passionate about bringing these lessons beyond the podcast and into organizations, conferences, and universities. If you're looking to inspire your team or ignite growth in your community, let's connect. Head over to JohnRMiles.com slash speaking to see how we can bring these transformational lessons to your next event. You can find links to everything we discussed today in the show notes at passionstruck.com. Videos of this

episode are also available on our YouTube channel. Don't forget to check out our sponsors and exclusive deals at passionstruck.com slash deals. Supporting those who support the show truly makes a difference. Before we go, I have something exciting lined up for our next episode. I'll be sitting down with Heather Moise, Olympic gold medalist, inductee into the world rugby hall of fame, and motivational speaker, where we'll discuss her journey of resilience and the power of mindset in overcoming adversity.

Sometimes it's just the tiniest little shift in our thinking that can help make big changes in our behaviour, but also in our outcomes. One of the shifts I've been talking to people about is this how, live in the how, using this one word, this how word. And oftentimes people aren't even pursuing the things they really want because they're asking the wrong question and they're asking, can I do this? For example, can I become the number one podcaster in the world? Whatever it is that goal might be, if it's a can I, that only leaves a binary option

of answers yes or no. And if it's something that someone really wants and it just seems just so enormous, then they're probably going to be like, well, if my choices are yes or no, then the answer is going to be probably not. So then why bother trying? Whereas if you don't even ask that question, can I, but you say, how can I? It immediately shifts your focus into solutions. It immediately is, you're not even thinking about whether you can or not. You're just thinking, how would I be able to do this? Thank you for joining us today and for your commitment to living a life of purpose and impact.

Remember, the fee for the show is simple. If you found value here, share it with someone else who might benefit. All it takes is sharing it with one person to truly make a difference. Let's continue to live what we listen. And until next time, live life passion stride.