Passion Struck with John R. Miles - 5 Inspiring Ways to Build the Power of Psychological Wealth | EP 540

Starting point is 00:00:00 Coming up next on Passion Struck, as Thanksgiving kicks off the holiday season filled with shopping sprees and Black Friday deals, have you stopped to think about what true wealth really means? It's not about what you own, but how you connect with others and experience joy. In last week's episode, we uncovered the healing power of gratitude and its ability to shift our perspectives. Now we're diving deeper into gratitude's transformative power, how it can lead to greater happiness, stronger relationships, and a sense of fulfillment that far exceeds anything money can buy. From mindful connections to simple acts of kindness, discover how to nurture your psychological

Starting point is 00:00:35 wealth and thrive as the year winds down. Are you ready to redefine what it truly means to be rich? Tune in as we explore how gratitude can change your life this season and beyond. Welcome to Passion Struck. Hi, I'm your host, John R. Miles. And on the show, we decipher the secrets, tips, and guidance of the world's most inspiring people and turn their wisdom into practical advice

Starting point is 00:00:58 for you and those around you. Our mission is to help you unlock the power of intentionality so that you can become the best version of yourself. If you're new to the show, I offer advice and answer listener questions on Fridays. We have long form interviews the rest of the week with guests ranging from astronauts to authors, CEOs, creators, innovators, scientists, military leaders, visionaries, and athletes. Now, let's go out there and become Passion Struck.

Starting point is 00:01:28 Hey, Passion Struck fam, welcome to episode 540 of the Passion Struck podcast. I am so grateful for each of you who tune in week after week, bringing your energy, dedication, and commitment to intentional living. It's the shared journey toward passion and growth that makes our community so inspiring. And if you're joining us for the first time, welcome!

Starting point is 00:01:47 You've just stepped into a space dedicated to making meaningful change in every area of your life, and I'm thrilled to have you here. This week has been packed with powerful conversations. Earlier, I sat down with Heather Moyes, two-time Olympic gold medalist, inductee into the World Rugby Hall of Fame, and champion of resilience. Heather shared her incredible insights on the power of mindset, how to break through self-imposed limits, and how small shifts in thinking can lead to extraordinary outcomes. Her approach to overcoming challenges and achieving personal excellence is truly inspiring.

Starting point is 00:02:18 You don't want to miss it. Then, on Thanksgiving Day, I spoke with Dr. Josh Axe, founder of Ancient Nutrition and one of the leading voices in natural health. Dr. Axe delivered practical strategies to break through limiting beliefs and become who you were born to be. His expertise is invaluable for anyone striving to live healthier and more intentionally. And if you haven't already, I highly recommend going back to listen to these episodes. They're packed with insights and actionable advice that will help you embrace resilience, prioritize your health, and live with greater purpose. For those diving into

Starting point is 00:02:49 the podcast for the first time, or if you want to introduce this to a friend or a family member, check out our episode Starter Packs. With over 540 episodes, we've curated playlists on themes like leadership, mental health, and personal growth to make it easier to find the perfect episode for you. Visit passionstruck.com slash starter packs or explore them on Spotify. And don't forget, if you're looking for exclusive content and tools to apply these lessons to your life, sign up for my live intentionally newsletter. Each week I'll send you practical insights to keep you inspired on your journey. Head to passionstruck.com to join. Plus, if you prefer a more visual format, all our interviews, solo episodes, and highlights are available on our YouTube channel.

Starting point is 00:03:28 Be sure to subscribe to stay updated on our latest content. Now, let's talk about today's episode. Picture this. You've just scored an amazing Black Friday deal on a gadget you've been eyeing for months. The excitement is real, but how long does that feeling actually last? A week? A day?

Starting point is 00:03:45 Maybe just a few hours? As the holiday season brings a frenzy of shopping, parties, and gift giving, it's worth pausing to ask, what truly makes us happy? The answer doesn't lie in what we own, but in how we feel about our lives. Our relationships, our sense of purpose, and the gratitude we cultivate. Psychologists call this psychological wealth a richness that transcends material possessions. In today's episode, I'm diving into what it means to build psychological wealth

Starting point is 00:04:11 and how gratitude is the cornerstone of this mindset. You'll discover how to focus on what truly matters, the dangers of tying happiness to material wealth, and practical ways to cultivate gratitude and enrich your daily life. Join me as we shift the focus from accumulating things to appreciating the intangible treasures that make life deeply fulfilling.

Starting point is 00:04:32 Are you ready to redefine what it means to be rich? Let's dive in. Thank you for choosing Passion Strike and choosing me to be your host and guide on your journey to creating an intentional life. Now, let that journey begin. ["Passion Strike"] life. Now, let that journey begin. Have you ever stopped to think about what it truly means to be rich? Most people immediately think about financial wealth, how much money you have,

Starting point is 00:04:55 the car you drive, or the house you live in. But let's go deeper than that. True richness isn't about material possessions. It's about how fulfilled you feel in your everyday life. That's where psychological wealth comes in. It's not measured in dollars or status, but in the quality of your emotional, mental, and relational resources. It's about feeling whole and grounded, not because of what you own, but because of how you live, the connections you nurture, and the meaning you find in your life. Researchers like Dr. Ed Deener have explored this idea, showing us that psychological wealth is what truly determines how rich our lives feel. Think about two people with the exact same income. One is overwhelmed, disconnected, and constantly chasing the next thing. The other is deeply engaged

Starting point is 00:05:41 with their community, feels purposeful, and focuses on gratitude. Their financial wealth might be identical, but their psychological wealth completely different. At its core, psychological wealth includes things like emotional well-being, how you handle life's ups and downs, the quality of your relationships, those deep, meaningful connections, a strong sense of purpose, knowing why you do what you do. Personal resilience. The ability to bounce back when life throws you curveballs. Gratitude. Finding joy in the little things. And meaningful experiences.

Starting point is 00:06:13 Moments that enrich your life and leave lasting impressions. And here's the kicker. While money can boost happiness in the short term, research shows it's fleeting. It doesn't have the same lasting impact as gratitude, purpose, or strong relationships. Think of psychological wealth like an internal bank account. You make deposits not with cash, but with experiences and choices that build a life you love.

Starting point is 00:06:35 But just like financial wealth, psychological wealth takes intentionality to grow. It requires us to step back and ask, am I focusing on what truly matters? Am I nurturing my relationships? Am I finding joy in the journey? Today we're going to dive deep into this concept and explore how you can start making deposits in your own internal account so you can live a life that's truly rich in every

Starting point is 00:06:58 way that matters. To really understand psychological wealth, let's look at it through the lens of a story we all know, the Grinch Who Stole Christmas. Picture The Grinch, sitting high atop Mount Crumpet, scowling down at Whoville. His cave is packed with gadgets and contraptions, material possessions that might seem impressive on the surface. But if we dig deeper, it's clear The Grinch is the perfect example of psychological poverty. Despite everything he owns, the Grinch is isolated, bitter, lonely, and deeply unhappy. His heart is described as two sizes too small, and while that's a fun metaphor, it's also a powerful way to illustrate his lack of emotional capacity.

Starting point is 00:07:38 He's missing all the key ingredients of psychological wealth, meaningful relationships, a sense of purpose, and the ability to experience joy and gratitude. Gratitude is a key turning point in The Grinch Who Stole Christmas, and it's where his story shifts from psychological poverty to true wealth. Determined to ruin Christmas, The Grinch hatches a plan. On Christmas Eve, dressed as Santa, and with his loyal dog

Starting point is 00:08:00 Max in tow, he sneaks into Whoville to steal everything associated with the holiday. Presents, decorations, even the feast. Heville to steal everything associated with the holiday. Presents, decorations, even the feast. He loads his sleigh with all the stolen items, planning to dump them on a mountaintop. But then something remarkable happens. As dawn breaks, the Grinch hears the Who's singing, their voices filled with joy despite their losses.

Starting point is 00:08:20 It stops him dead in his tracks. This moment forces the Grinch to realize that their happiness doesn't come from material things. It comes from their sense of community, togetherness, and gratitude. His attempt to steal Christmas backfires spectacularly, but in the best possible way. Instead of leaving the Whos devastated, he witnesses their unbreakable spirit.

Starting point is 00:08:40 They find joy in their connection to one another, and it's this realization that triggers a profound transformation in the Grinch. As his heart grows three sizes, it symbolizes a shift in his emotional capacity. He begins to experience the intangible richness of psychological well. He feels the warmth of belonging, the purpose of giving, and the joy of connection. This is where the Grinch's true growth lies, not in what he has, but in how he feels and relates to others.

Starting point is 00:09:08 The Grinch's story reminds us of an essential truth. Psychological wealth isn't about the size of your cave or the number of presents under your tree. It's about the size of your heart, the depth of your connections, and your capacity for joy and gratitude. As we navigate our own holiday season, let's take a cue from the Grinch's journey. Instead of focusing on acquiring more, let's invest in our relationships, nurture gratitude, and seek out meaningful experiences. In doing so,

Starting point is 00:09:34 we might just find our own hearts growing a few sizes and discover a richness in life we never imagined. Let's take this transformation one step further. The Grinch's journey not only teaches us the power of gratitude and connection, but also highlights a key lesson about our relationship with material wealth. Think about the Grinch's cave, overflowing with stolen presents, decorations, and gadgets. It's not just a hiding place.

Starting point is 00:09:56 It's a perfect metaphor for how many of us get caught up in the relentless pursuit of more. Like the Grinch before his epiphany, we've been conditioned to believe that happiness is tied to what we own. But just as his cave couldn't fill the void in his heart, neither can material success bring us lasting joy. Here's the danger.

Starting point is 00:10:16 Over-attaching to material wealth comes with a profound emotional cost. We work longer hours, take on more debt, and push ourselves to exhaustion, all while feeling like we're still falling short. Anxiety, burnout, and chronic stress become the price we pay for a lifestyle driven by accumulation. It's a cycle we've all seen, and maybe even experienced, the excitement of getting that new car, landing the promotion, or upgrading our home. But soon after, the thrill fades. This is hedonic adaptation at

Starting point is 00:10:46 work. The phenomenon where the satisfaction from external rewards quickly wears off, leaving us chasing the next big thing. The Grinch's breakthrough was realizing that Christmas doesn't come from a store. And for us, the shift begins when we recognize that true happiness isn't found in what we own, but in how we live. It's about stepping off the treadmill of consumption and redefining success in terms of meaning, connection, and presence. When we shift our focus from having to being, everything changes. Instead of accumulating things, we begin valuing experiences. Instead of competing for status, we prioritize relationships.

Starting point is 00:11:23 Instead of seeking validation from the outside, we cultivate inner fulfillment. This is where psychological wealth truly shines. It's not measured by the size of our house or the gadgets we own, but by the depth of our relationships, the sense of purpose we carry, and our ability to find joy in the moment. And this choice, how we define wealth, is especially relevant during the holiday season. Do we keep chasing material goals, or do we invest in the intangible riches of connection, gratitude, and personal growth? The Grinch's story shows us what's possible when we choose the latter.

Starting point is 00:11:57 His most profound transformation wasn't in what he acquired, but in how he saw the world and connected with others. So as we stand at this crossroads, let's ask ourselves, how do we want to define success and happiness? The answer isn't about having more. It's about being more. More present, more connected, more authentic. And in that, we find a richness that no amount of material wealth can ever provide.

Starting point is 00:12:22 So let's discuss the role of relationships in building psychological wealth. Human beings are inherently social creatures, and our connections with others play a vital role in shaping our emotional and psychological well-being. Yet in the hustle and bustle of daily life, we often take these relationships for granted, much like the Grinch did during his solitary existence atop Mount Crumpet. Initially, the Grinch's heart is described as two sizes too small, symbolizing not only his lack of kindness, but also his disconnection from meaningful relationships. One of the strongest predictors of long-term happiness isn't the size of our paycheck

Starting point is 00:12:57 or the things we own, but the depth of our connections. This idea is powerfully reinforced by the Harvard study of adult development, which has followed participants for over 80 years. And I did a deep dive on this topic last January with its director, Bob Wallinger, in episode 239. You absolutely want to go back and check that out. The study found that those who maintain warm, meaningful relationships reported greater happiness, lived longer, and experienced better health. The Grinch, isolated in his cave, embodies the consequences of neglecting relationships. His disdain for the Hoos and their joyful celebrations reflects a deeper emotional wound,

Starting point is 00:13:36 a longing for connection that he doesn't yet recognize. It's only when he witnesses the Hoos singing joyously, even after losing their material possessions, that he begins to understand the true essence of community and connection. This idea ties directly into the holiday season. Thanksgiving, for example, serves as a poignant reminder of the wealth found in relationships. As we gather with loved ones, it's the shared laughter, the moments of understanding, and the simple reassurance of being there for one another that makes those times precious. Financial wealth may provide opportunities, but it's the strength of our relationships

Starting point is 00:14:12 that gives those experiences meaning. Yet so many of us overlook this truth. Instead we focus on accumulating things, believing it will bring lasting happiness. Consider these startling statistics. 70% of Americans report feeling stressed about financial pressures. The average household carries over $6,000 in credit card debt.

Starting point is 00:14:34 Holiday spending alone often increases personal debt by 25 to 30%. This relentless cycle of spending leaves many of us burned out and disconnected. Like the Grinch, we've become conditioned to believe that happiness comes from acquiring things, but hedonic adaptation tells us otherwise. The thrill of a new gadget or a lavish holiday quickly fades while the stress of financial pressure lingers. The Grinch's transformation shows us another path. When he

Starting point is 00:15:01 finally opens himself up to vulnerability and connection, his life changes profoundly. Neuroscience even backs this up. When we bond with others, our brains release oxytocin, the bonding hormone, which fosters trust and closeness. These are the elements that were missing in the Grinch's life until he chose to embrace connection and community. Ultimately, the most successful and fulfilling lives

Starting point is 00:15:25 are built not on the accumulation of material wealth, but on the strength of our relationships. The Grinch's story reminds us that happiness is found in love, community, and shared experiences. As we reflect on our own lives this holiday season, let's take the opportunity to nurture our own relationships, appreciate the support they offer, and embrace the profound richness they bring.

Starting point is 00:15:46 Now that we've explored the role of relationships in building psychological wealth, let's dive into how psychological wealth transforms life's challenges. When the Grinch's plan to steal Christmas fails, he's initially unable to cope with the Who's unexpected joy. His narrow focus on material possessions, and in his case the destruction of them, leaves him emotionally unprepared for the resilience and gratitude that the Whos display. It's only when he experiences connection gratitude and a sense of purpose that he begins to understand and

Starting point is 00:16:17 transform. People who practice gratitude regularly, like the Whos singing despite their loss, demonstrate an incredible ability to find silver linings even in the face of adversity. Gratitude shifts our focus from what's missing to what remains, providing a foundation for hope and resilience. For the Hoos, their shared joy and unbreakable community spirit become their greatest assets, melting even the Grinch's hardened heart. Strong relationships, as shown in the Grinch's transformation, act as a safety net during the tough times. The Who's unwavering connection to each other reveals that community is not just a source of comfort, but a source of strength. Relationships remind us that we're not

Starting point is 00:16:55 alone, offering encouragement and perspective when we need them most. Purpose also plays a critical role in how psychological wealth helps us endure hardships. For the Grinch, his newfound purpose of contributing to the Hugh community gives him direction and fulfillment, transforming his bitterness into joy. Purpose reminds us of the bigger picture, helping us stay grounded and focused even when life feels uncertain. Decades of research echo these truths. Studies show that individuals who reflect on the positive aspects of their lives during stressful situations experience lower levels of anxiety and depression.

Starting point is 00:17:31 Gratitude and strong relationships are central to this resilience, creating a mindset that fosters growth even in the face of difficulty. Psychological wealth doesn't shield us from hardship, but it equips us to cope and grow through it. Like the Grinch, we're not immune to life's challenges, but we can choose how we respond. By nurturing gratitude, cultivating strong connections, and living with purpose, we develop the inner resources needed to thrive, no matter what life throws our way. As we build this internal richness, we create a foundation that sustains us,

Starting point is 00:18:03 far beyond life's fleeting highs and inevitable lows. The Grinch's transformation is a testament to the enduring strength of psychological wealth and the profound growth it makes possible. As we've seen throughout today's episode, psychological wealth is what truly sustains us through life's challenges. Now, let's shift from understanding psychological wealth to building it in our own lives. Inspired by the Grinch's journey, here are five actionable practices you can use to cultivate greater fulfillment and resilience this holiday season and beyond. As I've discussed today, the Grinch's transformation begins when he witnesses the Who's Joy despite the loss of their material possessions.

Starting point is 00:18:42 This pivotal moment teaches us that true wealth lies in our perspective, not in our possessions. So here's an actionable idea, the Grinch Challenge. For one week, commit to finding joy in situations you typically find frustrating. When stuck in traffic, appreciate the extra time to listen to a podcast. When plans fall through, see it as an opportunity for spontaneity. At the end of each day, reflect on how this shift in perspective affected your mood and interactions. The impact of this is that this practice trains your brain to seek positivity, build resilience and emotional wealth that can sustain you through life's ups and downs.

Starting point is 00:19:18 Second, cultivate community connection. As we've shown today, the Grinch's heart grows when he's welcomed into the Hughes community, showing that genuine connections are the foundation of psychological wealth. So here's an actionable idea. Whoville gatherings. Organize monthly community potlucks where neighbors bring dishes and share stories. Create a skill exchange where community members teach each other something new. The goal is to foster the kind of inclusive, supportive community that transformed the Grinch. The impact of this is that strong community ties provide a safety net during tough times

Starting point is 00:19:52 and a source of joy during good ones, significantly boosting overall well-being and resilience. The third thing that we can do is to practice radical kindness. The Who's kindness towards the Grinch, even after his attempt to ruin their holiday, demonstrates the transformative power of unconditional goodwill. So here's an actionable idea. The three times rule. Commit to responding with kindness in situations where you'd normally react negatively. Do this three times more than feels natural. If someone cuts you off in traffic instead of honking, wish them a safe journey. If a colleague is curt, respond with warmth. Here's the impact.

Starting point is 00:20:28 This practice not only improves your relationships, but also rewires your brain to default to kindness, reducing stress and increasing your own happiness. The fourth actionable practice that we can undertake is to find purpose beyond possessions. The Grinch's revelation that maybe Christmas doesn't come from a store is a powerful reminder to seek meaning beyond material wealth. So here's an actionable idea, the gift of presents project. Instead of buying gifts, create personalized presents vouchers for loved ones. These could be promises to spend quality time together, like a nature walk, a home-cooked meal, or simply an afternoon of undivided attention.

Starting point is 00:21:05 Here's the important impact from doing this. This shifts the focus from accumulating things to creating meaningful experiences, fostering deeper connections and lasting memories. And the last actionable idea from today's episode is to embrace personal growth. The Grinch's journey from isolation to community involvement shows that it's never too late to change and grow. So here's the actionable idea, the growth carving ritual. Just as the Grinch carved the roast beast, carve out time each week for personal growth.

Starting point is 00:21:34 Learn a new skill, read a challenging book, or have a conversation with someone whose views differ from yours. Document your journey of growth. Here's the impact. This commitment to continuous learning and self-improvement builds adaptability and confidence, key components of psychological wealth. By engaging deeply with these practices, you can begin to build a foundation of psychological wealth that strengthens your relationships, enhances your well-being, and helps you navigate life's challenges with grace. This holiday season, let's take a cue from the Grinch's transformation

Starting point is 00:22:05 and commit to growing our hearts three sizes by investing in what truly matters. Let's focus less on what's under the tree and more on the moments and people that surround it. True wealth is found in shared meals, heartfelt conversations, and the simple joys that remind us of what really matters. I encourage you to pause and reflect, write a letter, or send a text to someone who has supported or inspired you, expressing your gratitude for their presence in your life. Take a moment to think about the experiences that bring you joy this year, the ones money couldn't buy. Those moments of connection, laughter, and love are the essence of psychological wealth. Dr. Seuss said it best, maybe Christmas and happiness doesn't come from a store. Maybe it means a little bit more.

Starting point is 00:22:49 Let's carry this wisdom into the new year, committing to nurturing our psychological wealth and enriching the lives of those around us. This holiday season, challenge yourself to grow your heart three sizes. Embrace the five practices we've discussed, shifting your perspective, strengthening connections, practicing kindness, finding purpose,

Starting point is 00:23:09 and committing to personal growth. By investing in what truly matters, you'll create a foundation of happiness that sustains you through life's challenges and celebrations alike. As you navigate this season in the year ahead, let gratitude and connection guide you, reminding you that the greatest gifts are not

Starting point is 00:23:25 wrapped in shiny paper, but are the love, lessons, and memories we share. Here's to a season and a life filled with true wealth. To support you in cultivating psychological wealth, I've created a free downloadable resource, the Five Practices for Building Psychological Wealth. This guide offers actionable steps to help you integrate gratitude, connection,

Starting point is 00:23:44 and purpose into your life. You can download it now by going to the show notes at passionstruck.com along with additional resources to inspire your journey. If today's episode resonated with you, please take a moment to leave a five star rating and review. It's one of the best ways to help others discover the show and join our mission of intentional living. And if you know someone who could benefit from today's message, share this episode with them. Together we can spread the gift of transformation and purpose. I'm also passionate about taking these lessons beyond the podcast. Whether it's through keynote speeches, workshops, or corporate events, I'd love to bring this message of resilience, connection, and psychological wealth to your team or community. Learn more about how we can partner by visiting

Starting point is 00:24:23 johnrmiles.com slash speaking. You can find links to everything we discussed today in today's episode team or community. deals at passionstruck.com slash deals. Supporting those who support the show makes all the difference. Before we wrap up, next time on Passion Struck, I'm joined by Cody Sanchez, author of Main Street Millionaire, How to Make Extraordinary Wealth by Buying Ordinary Businesses. In this eye-opening conversation, Cody reveals the secrets to creating financial freedom and living with purpose through the power of ownership. We dive into a rich framework, the surprising wealth hidden in boring industries and how you can join the movement to take back control from corporate giants.

Starting point is 00:25:11 Whether you're ready to take the leap into small business ownership or simply looking to rethink your financial future, this is a conversation you won't wanna miss. We have a real aging demographic shift that we've seen all around the world and is starting to accelerate as this baby boomer generation, the youngest of which are now starting to retire.

Starting point is 00:25:30 And this generation is the big predominant owner of small businesses. And there's two things going on with that. That means that you have a ton of supply, right? So always good to buy something at a discount if there's a big supply. The problem though is most of these owners don't know how to sell their business. They don't know how to prep their business for sale. They don't know that their business is even sellable and they certainly don't know how to price it. And so we have to educate the populace and how to train business owners to think about transferring their businesses so everybody gets a fair price and a fair exchange.

Starting point is 00:26:02 Thank you for spending your time with me today. Your commitment to living a life of purpose and impact inspires me, and I hope this episode has added value to your journey. Remember, the fee for the show is simple. If you found value here, share it with someone else who might benefit. Let's keep living what we learn. Until next time, live life passion stride. You

Passion Struck with John R. Miles - 5 Inspiring Ways to Build the Power of Psychological Wealth | EP 540

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