Passion Struck with John R. Miles - How Shark Tank Changed Her Life to Overcome Personal Trauma w/ Tereson Dupuy EP 16

Episode Date: April 6, 2021

Ever wondered what sets successful entrepreneurs apart? And how they manage to overcome business and mental health challenges as they go about chasing their big goals? In today’s show, we interview FuzziBunz founder and Shark Tank participant, Tereson Dupuy shares with her distilled wisdom on entrepreneurship, persistence, and mental health. She discusses how Shark Tank changed her life.  Growing up in New Orleans, Tereson was always driven and keen to make her own mark. But, unfortunately for her, she had to deal with severe trauma issues in her childhood years.  Being an adopted child and having a serial killer as a next-door neighbor compounded her mental health issues, and Tereson ended up a full-blown alcoholic by the time she was 14.  Tereson got her big idea for FuzziBunz when she could not find good and affordable diapers for her autistic son, who was prone to skin rashes. While her sewing skills came in handy, Tereson went ahead with her business even though she had no prior experience with production or branding. FuzziBunz was a huge hit as the product filled a market gap while addressing some big pain points. Even though Tereson tasted commercial success, she found it difficult to draw boundaries and fend off those eager to take advantage of her. She talks about how other companies blatantly copied her product design. And, how after 12 years of running her business successfully, she started facing heated competition from her Chinese counterparts. “Tereson, the problem is you.” At this juncture, Tereson got an opportunity to appear on Shark Tank. The sharks were brutal in their assessment and concluded that the biggest problem with Tereson’s business was Tereson herself. Six months after appearing on Shark Tank, Tereson exited her business completely. And then she started working on setting her life back in order. Tereson was on the verge of launching another retail product. But then covid struck. And then, tragically, her son died from suicide.  Currently, Tereson has decided to put entrepreneurship in the backseat as she has gotten a dream opportunity to help out women in India. She is in a happy space as she savors the opportunity to work with some incredible people. As a huge proponent of mental well-being, she talks about “exorcising” your ego and stepping into the spiritual. You will learn why you need to let go and surrender to be at peace with yourself. Enjoy! Questions That I Ask On This Show                                                                                                                                                                                                What was life like for you when you were growing up? What made you get on Shark Tank? What words of wisdom do you have for those who are facing stigmas? Surrender before you heal – can you explain this? And so much more… What You Will Learn In This Show Why an inflated ego is the biggest pitfall for entrepreneurs Biggest takeaways from my Shark Tank experience Why you need to surrender yourself to heal Drawing boundaries and protect yourself and your business How to cultivate good mental health And so much more… Resources For Tereson Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/teresondupuy/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/teresondupuy/ FuzziBunz: https://fuzzibunz.com/ Refusing to Drown: https://refusingtodrown.com/ 12 Step process for business success: https://refusingtodrown.com/products/superpowers-for-entrepreneurs-a-12-step-guide-to-business-success Where to Follow Passion Struck and John R. Miles Follow Passion Struck on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/passion_struck_podcast  -- Follow John R. Miles Here: Website - https://passionstruck.com/​ ​​Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/john_r_miles ​​ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Johnrmiles.c0m​ ​ Twitter: https://twitter.com/Milesjohnr​ ​​Medium: https://medium.com/@JohnRMiles​ ​ John's Website: https://johnrmiles.com/​ - John's New eBook - The Passion Struck Framework https://passionstruck.com/coaching/​

just take the first step. The first step for me is not going to be the first step for you. It's not going to be the first step for the first step in the right direction. Takes courage. It might be buying a book. It might be picking up the phone and finding a therapist. It might be walking into an AA meeting. It might be listening to someone's podcast. And it might just be a thought that I would like to change something, you know, because it will it those seeds begin in our mind of I'd like to change something or maybe something isn't working correctly in my internal on my internal hard drive. And we can reprogram those hard drives. I believe that we can. That's think, what consciousness is. It's a very powerful thing that can be manipulated

and fixed, maybe not fixed, because fixed means broken, but it can be fine-tuned, and we can indeed operate differently in the world if how we were operating was not working. Welcome to the PassionStruck podcast. My name is John Miles, a former combat veteran and multi-industry CEO, turned entrepreneur and human performance expert. Each week we showcase an inspirational person and message that helps you unlock your hidden

potential and unleash your creativity and leadership abilities. Thank you for spending time with me today and let's get igniting. Thank you for joining me today on the PassionStrike podcast. Michelle Obama said, it is important for you to understand that your experience facing and overcoming adversity is actually one of your biggest advantages.

Prama and adversity are both things that I've experienced in my personal life, and I understand that following the darkness of winter is an indomitable summer. This is a great lead in today to our guest, Teresan DePouy, who will discuss how she overcame her own personal demons to unlock a purpose-driven life. Teresan and I discuss how everyone can have everything in life that they desire if they commit to that dream. How surrender is the solution to any and all healing. How consciousness should be actively used to create the life we want and how we can create a heaven here on earth,

reality and the ability to create the tools to find it. This conversation with Tereson was absolutely fascinating and I cannot wait to share it with you. Tereson DePouy is an entrepreneur, writer, podcaster, and an inspiration to most people that know her. She is best known for her contributions to the modern cloth diaper movement with the product she featured on Shark Tank called Fuzzy Buns Dipers. But those are just merely highlights.

Her lifelong battle with alcoholism, mental health issues, and the longstanding impacts of Krama cost her nearly everything in 2013. She was bankrupt, close to homelessness and suicidal, and she began writing a soon-to-be-published memoir and newly released podcast appropriately titled Refusing to Drown. Because she kept on swimming, she is now living the life she always dreamed of, and is living proof that money does not buy happiness. Healing does, in fact, happen. And that miracles are available to all of us. [♪ Music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, music playing in background, to the podcast. I am so excited to have you here today and for us to finally connect. Thank you so much. Thank you so much for having me. This is exciting. Perfect. Passion struck.

Well, you have such a great background and are one of the few people who have actually been on Shark Tank and not like me, just an observer on it. And everyone I've talked to who's been on the show, whether they have actually gotten a deal or not, and more of them have not gotten a deal than have that I know, have said it makes profound changes in the way that they approach their business and life. But before we get into that, where I want to start this discussion is, what was happening with you before you went on Shark Tank?

Because, you know, as I read, you were running a successful business for over a decade before that. But, you know, what was life like and, you know, what caused you to go on the show? Well, let's see. What life was like right before I went on the show, it was a mess. But to understand how it got to be such a mess, I'm going to back up a little bit and tell a little bit of my story because it's important, especially if there are entrepreneurs listening that have a passion that they just have to bring into this world, this story is important.

So I'm gonna start not at the beginning, but kind of at the beginning, and tell you, I think I was born with a fire in my belly to do something big in this world. Even when I was a small child, I would tell my mom, I'd get up on the kitchen counter every day, I'm like, this is what I'm gonna do, and this is what I'm gonna do.

I just had big dreams and big aspirations. I wanted to change the world, right? Like I knew even at eight years old that I was going to do something impactful with my life. And but you know, early on in my life, I started having issues well with life and trauma. I'm a very sensitive person so I have extremes. If things are going well in my life, the world is perfect. If things are not going well, the world is ending. That's just that's just a part of how I'm made. And I think a lot of passionate people are sensitive people and can probably relate to that. But early on in my life, I was adopted so that was like trauma number one and it is a trauma. You know, even though we think babies don't remember it and we place them in loving homes with loving parents, it's still an energetic wound of abandonment. And that played a part in my life

growing up as a child, growing up as an adolescent and in business. And while my parents are very loving, we live next door to someone who would become a serial killer. Oh my goodness. Yeah, I mean, this is... When I read my story, I'm like, Jesus. Wow. And you grew up in Louisiana. I did.

In New Orleans. Yes, a suburb of New Orleans. But, you know, this person was like a brother to me. And, you know, the physical act like a brother to me. And you know, the physical act of being sexually abused is one thing, but all of the other things that go with it, the manipulation, the lying, the secrecy, the shame, I carried that as this sensitive little person. And became an alcoholic very early in my life as a way of coping and sexual trauma, even more sexual trauma was put on top of that.

And by the time I was 14, I was a full blown alcoholic. But I really don't want to talk about too much about alcoholism that's not my focus. But when I hit 25, I grew up a little bit. I was an adult. I entered into motherhood, which I absolutely loved being a parent, but I had special needs. Children, one of them was he had autism, and that's who I invented the product for, because I had this baby that had special needs from his head to his toes, his skin was always wounded or scratchy, or he had eggs in my really bad. He had diaper rash

really bad. I was like, how am I going to fix this child's problem? How am I going to be a better parent and a better mother? And wound up putting one piece of fabric into another piece of fabric made a diaper out of it, kept him dry, got rid of his rash, and then voila, like all of those big plans and moments, things that I had dreamt about were coming true. You know, I had found my million dollar idea. And at that point, I was 25, 28, I think, when I had him, I was still fairly true to who I was. Like I was always a hippie chick, you know, barefoot

or Birkenstock clothes I would make myself, I made my children's clothes, you know, I knew who I was. And then I built this business, and I still don't know how I built the business. Like I had no formal training as a business person. I didn't know how to build a manufacturing facility, but I did. I didn't know how to brand a product, but I did. I didn't know how to brand a product, but I did.

I didn't know that I was an industry, industry, disruptor, but I was. I just was on autopilot. And things happened. I believe that they happened because I was still true to who I was and authentically me. And I was also doing this from a place of a pure intention, too. I wanted to do something good

for my child, good for other parents, and for the environment. And I was. But where things really shifted for me, and this was about five years before I went on Shark Tank, is all of this trauma started catching up with me. And I was making, I didn't know how to set boundaries with people, so people would take advantage of me and often. I had something that was really good, I was making a lot of money and then all of these people come out of the woodwork of, I want a piece. Oh yeah, they do. Yeah, I want a piece and I was ill-equipped.

Ill-equipped to deal with any of, you know, I don't want to say fame because it, you know, was never like, I was famous within the Diaphring industry, the club Diaphring industry, which is a small pool, you know, but I didn't how to protect myself. I wasn't taught how to protect myself at an early age. And then Ego started really taking over, you know. I went from Birkenstocks to Bloomingdale's and Fendi Purses and Prada and Chanel sunglasses. I didn't grow up with money. We grew up okay, but I struggled for the first part of my life as a young parent. Their dad didn't make a whole lot of money, but I was like, wow, I have money now. I'm going to spend it. It wasn't a conscious decision,

but it sucked me in and did not do me any favors and I was making a lot of mistakes because of that. Yeah. Well, I wanna talk about a few things there. First, I kind of know your situation because I probably at very similar times, because you and I are about the same age.

You know, I had a son. I think I was, I was 27, 28 when he was born, but at that time we were living in San Diego, and he was getting really bad diaper rashes. And so we started to try to find some type of cloth diapers, and we ended up signing up with a service, So we started to try to find some type of cloth diapers, and we ended up signing up with a service, but it was so expensive. It was almost 10X, what getting just disposable diapers was.

And so, we tried it for a while and it helped them, but it became cost prohibitive. So I can see where you're going. The second second thing I learned about reading your background is you did take some steps. So you started your own product development because I read that you actually taught yourself how to sew and to be a seamstress while you were going through college. I did. I did. Those out of all the classes I took, the three electives that I took were what made me the most money. That's hilarious. Oh, Mac.

So, um, so then the other thing you brought up, which I think is extremely important for the listeners, is the first chapter of the book I wrote and the e-book you can get on our website called the Passion Strike Framework is I call it, my word for it is Mission Angler. And the exact title for it is, you have to muster the power to do something big. But I chose the word angler because you know, fishermen are always trying to get that big fish And it doesn't always come at first But you've got to keep and keep you know searching inside to find it You were lucky that you find found it at a young age but to find it. You were lucky that you found it at a young age, but to me, if you don't have

that thing that just drives you, that gives you passion, you're not going to be able to commit to it, ignite it, and then follow it. So with that as a backdrop, your year 10, or at that time, you're 12 into your business. And how did Shark Tank, how did that experience come about? Did you apply? Did they seek you out? Like, how does that happen? Yeah, please scouted me to be on the show. And I will never forget this moment.

I walked into my office and there was a note, Shark Tank called. And there was like, oh, and people had been telling me, it wasn't that old of a show. I think it was season four. It'd been around for a couple of seasons. And people would say, oh, you need to go on Shark Tank. I'm like, no, no, you know, it's a startup show.

I'm not a startup. And that's exactly what I told the producers. I'm like, I don't think I'm a good fit for your show. Did I say that my ego was overly inflated? Like, I still can't believe I did that. I should have said, oh my God, thank you. Oh, for thinking of me, right? Gratitude.

But now, I'm like, I don't think I'm a good fit for your show. How many, what's your viewership? And it's like 5 million people on a Friday night on ABC. I'm like, okay, I'll try out. And so I did. So, I auditioned and started at some point actually wanting to get on the show because my business was failing. It wasn't quite there yet, but it wasn't, after 12 years, it was the first year that it wasn't going in an upward direction.

It's like, okay, and everything was changing. China was taking over my market. There were five dollar diapers all over the place. Consumers didn't know the difference between a $20 diaper and a $5 diaper. They just see $5, you know, and who can beat that? It was a really hard situation for me to be in. But that wasn't, you know, I can blame that, but a lot of the issue was me. And when I didn't think that, you know, I just, I couldn't, I couldn't see my part in the equation. And when I walked out on that Oriental carpet, I mean, oh my God,

I've never been so nervous in my life. Nobody, it didn't seem like I looked nervous, but I was terrified. But I was also confident, you know, I knew what my numbers were, I knew they weren't great. The top number looked really good. The bottom lump number looked horrible. And I had to explain that. And I did. And, you know, all of the sharks had something good to say to me, except for Damon John. I don't think he liked me very much, but okay, I'm okay with that. But they understood

where I was. You know, they understood the patent infringement that I was facing and it was just, it was overwhelming. I couldn't, I couldn't compete anymore. I was kind of drowning. And Robert Hershivek, that is what he told, he told me, he said, Tererson, it looks like you're looking for a lifeline. And I'm like, yeah, I was looking for a lifeline. Then he said something that blew me away, that I was not expecting, but I needed to hear it. And he said, Tereson, and he said it kindly. He wasn't being ugly. He said, I think the problem is you.

I was like, oh my God. Oh my God. And the only thing, again, my ego could think is, I'm going to be exposed. People are going to know I'm a fraud. Oh my God, 5 million people on a prime time slot on Friday night. This is what they're going to take away is that I'm the problem with my business. And it did not make it to air. So the shark tank gods heard my plea, but I heard him. I heard him loud and clear. And I went home, fell apart. I was still drinking heavily at this time and didn't get out of bed for a month. Step down a CEO of my company because I mean,

if I was the problem, I certainly didn't need to be CEO of this company. And I was willing to walk away and put other people in charge that might be able to do better. And they didn't. You know, they didn't. Now I wound up exiting the company about six months after Shark Tank to the wrong people. But it would take me a year to really peel back that onion, because all I heard was, Teres and the problem is you. The problem is you, the problem is you.

It's like, well, I'm an alcoholic. Let's start there and get sober. I did about a year after Shark Tank. I got sober, I quit drinking just, I knew I was now calling from time I was 14. That was not news to me. But I didn't understand How much trauma was running the show, you know, I could blame it on alcohol, but it really wasn't that

It was more the effects of trauma and living with PTSD and you know Letting again not knowing how to set boundaries. I just didn't know how to say no You know when your know is taken away from you at 6 or 8, again at 14, how do you find it within yourself to say no, you're not taking advantage of me anymore. No, you can't have this. No, you can't take all of my money. No, you can't take my intellectual property.

That was my biggest issue was things could just be taken away from me so easily. And I didn't know how to keep anything So that for my this as well Well, you know, I I firmly believe that we are our biggest critic and it's that inner voice that stops most of us from doing And becoming what we what we can be and living the type of life that we want, which you gave a great example of that. And it's until we really examine our self identity, which can be extremely difficult to do,

because it's so much easier believing we're a projection of who we are than facing the brutal reality of what is actually going on with us. So that takes huge courage to do what you did and to go after looking at your inner demons. I myself have been through CPT, I guess they call it, what's the word I'm looking for? CPPT therapy for PTSD. Yeah, and one of the things, whether you call it a stuck point like you do in an agile, or you call it a belief, it know, it's really a hidden bias

that you create in your mind. And those beliefs, you know, I'm not good enough or people are always out for me or whatever they are until you deal with those and you face them, you know, it's gonna be hard to overcome them. So how long did that journey take for you? Oh God, a painful seven years.

And it was, you know, recovery is not linear. It's two step forward, one step backwards. And I started in 2013, really working on it. And, you know, getting sober was a two to three year journey in and of itself. And then around year three I started, so I went back to work for Fuzzy Bones after I left. And that was a mess too. But you know, realized how I attract sociopaths into my life, whether they're employers, boyfriends, that was that early imprint from my neighbor. That's what I

knew. And I was in that kind of relationship to professionally. So I had to leave that after realizing, wow, I'm just on autopilot. I'm just a walking, talking, trauma response. This is no good. And you know, I'm doing the trauma Was about it probably a year and I had to start doing things differently like I thought healing from trauma and PTSD would be Painful and it wasn't painful. I just put one foot in front of the other and said I'm leaving this situation by and Started trusting my intuition more and working with my own consciousness. Some people call it a higher power. Some people call it God, Spirit, the universe.

I believe it's all of those things and more, but working with my own internal, energetic, imprint system and un-unlayering and un-- it's the word I'm like untangling the trauma and replacing it with new ways of behaving and new ways of seeing the world and it's had a profound effect on my life and and how I operate in it. Yeah so for the listeners who are out there, because I think you bring up a great point. You know, for me, it's taken years and years and years of working on myself.

You know, for you, you know, you mentioned seven years, I find that in our world today, we want things to happen instantaneously. And, you know, what I have found is eventually everyone hits a brick wall. And some people, you know, are lucky to find it earlier. Some people it takes longer or, you know, sometimes you're facing something like you were or like I was with PTSD. And, you know, I think the stigma is getting better, but, you know, there has definitely been times when there's a stigma, and so you don't want to talk about it.

You internalize it, which ends up just making it worse. So if you were going to give the listener who is facing something like this, it doesn't have to be trauma, but facing a fear or an obstacle, you know, what words of wisdom would you give them on how they could approach this and overcome it? Just take the first step. Just take the first step and it, the first step for me is not going to be the first step for you. It's not going to be the first step for the first step in the right direction takes courage. It might be buying a book. It might be picking up the phone and finding a therapist. It might be walking into an AA meeting, it might be listening to someone's podcast and it might just be a thought that I would like to change

something, you know, because it will, it, those seeds begin in our mind of I'd like to change something or maybe something isn't working correctly in my internal on my internal hard drive and we can reprogram those hard drives. I believe that we can. That's I think what consciousness is. It's a very powerful thing that can be manipulated and fixed. Maybe not fixed because fixed means broken but it can be fine tuned and we can indeed operate differently in the world if how we were operating was not working. Yeah, the example I like to give, I mean there are two of them.

One is kind of pushing the car example, the other one is you know you're stuck in quick sand and at first as you're trying to get out, you know, you're sinking and you're not making progress, but as you keep working on it, you know, you start pulling yourself out and then over time, you get yourself out of it. It's not going to be an easy journey, but the most important thing as you're saying is you've got to start, then the most important thing is you've got to commit to that start and then take constant action because without action, nothing is going to happen. Right, action is everything. Action is everything. If I would not have told my employer, partner,

boss, whatever he was, I can't do this anymore. The way I'm doing it, it's killing me. I'd still be stuck in that situation. And that meant for me walking away from a brand that I had built and loved and I made for my children, like I was emotionally attached to that brand. And some financial security. I walked away from it all to walk into myself and do something good for myself and get out of a nasty situation that I was in. That's fantastic. I, I, um, about a year ago, might have been a year and a half ago, I had the privilege of meeting Sarah Blakely, who you probably know, the founder the Spanx. And you know, one of the things I heard her talk about, and when she gives speeches now, it's one of the permanent themes is hiring your weakness. But for her,

you know, it was interesting to hear the dialogue because she was so, I don't know, I don't want to use the word depressed, but demoralized at a certain point of time that she almost left her own business because what was happening to her is she kept doing these tasks that she didn't really like doing. And so she wasn't enjoying it. And so it was, you know, finding for her that counterbalance of someone who could take those tasks

that weren't appealing to her off her plate that Spanks really had the massive growth And to apply that in a little bit different way as you were coming out of this and going through this journey Did you use a mentor or were there other people out there who were helping you? Well, that's the beauty of 12-step life, is that you have a community of people that get you. It doesn't matter what your issue is, food, sex, love, alcohol, drugs, pot, whatever. There's a 12-step program out there.

I think there needs to be a 12-step group for entrepreneurs, and I'm not joking about that, because it's a struggle in and up itself. But I did have a lot of support and my greatest support was my own higher power, I think, of listening to my intuition. And if the phone rang and someone said, hey, we're starting this group. And the phone rings out of the blue, right? Then I'm paying attention and I might consider going to that group if it was it fell in my lap that way. So yeah, the universe sent me all of the things that I needed when I was willing and I said, okay, I'm ready, you know, and I just all I had to do is sit back and wait for those things to

appear and they all did. They were laid at my feet, the steps that I needed to take to get where I'm at now. And I like where I am now. That's fantastic. At that point though, you were facing two crossroads. One would have been doomed and the other is the path you ended up taking. What were some of the words of wisdom,

you know, as you say, that pathway was laid out before you, what were some of those, you know, what were some of those things that ended up entering into your life that changed it to go on the positive crack instead of the potential negative one? Oh, God, I don't know if there were any words of wisdom necessarily that stood out for me. I don't know, but for me, my solution was exercising the ego and stepping into the spiritual. But yeah, I don't know if any, I heard any words of wisdom necessarily that didn't come

out of my own head that were impactful. Are you ready to overcome your fears and start committing yourself to mastery and growth in your life and career? If you are, we're ready to help you. Go to passionstruck.com slash coaching right now, and you'll be able to download the passionstruck framework and connect with a member of our coaching team. Yeah. One of the things that you brought up to me before our talk today is that

you talk about this word surrender and how important surrender it's one of your mantras is you've got a surrender before you can heal and you can you talk to the listeners about that a little bit and what that means because I can talk for days. When I saw it, most people don't hear the word surrender, typically in a good light. So I wanted for you to be able to explain what that means. Right. Well, I believe with every single fiber in my being

that we have a roadmap of everything that we're supposed to do, all of the right solutions. If it's a business, we have a roadmap of everything that we're supposed to do, all of the right solutions. If it's a business, we have the roadmap to make that happen, to pursue our dreams, our desires, and to get to a place of wholeness and happiness and fulfillment. I think all of those things are built in within our own subconscious mind, our own consciousness. So when you think about surrender, I surrender so that I'm always on the right path. If I'm sitting in ego and I don't surrender, then I'm going down this other path. To me, it's two ways. I can either swim upstream like a salmon and fight every single

you know step of the way going oh I think I want this, I want this, I want this and then you know there's roadblocks and I'm jumping over hurdles and it's not fun. Or I can surrender to what is already in me, the knowledge that's already in me, the path that's already in me and say, okay, I'm just gonna flow downstream now and I'm gonna let the things come to me. That's what happens when I surrender.

And that's what happens with, when many people surrender. Some people call it God's will. Some people call it the will of the universe. I just think it's our own conscious plan. It's already here for us waiting for us to surrender to it and take the ride. Yeah, so why do you think,

I mean, I think there's a lot of truth to that. And why do you think so many people out there today are resistant to that? Because it's not easy. It's not easy. If you said to people, here's the door to heaven on earth and here's the door to hell, which one do you want to walk through? I guarantee you most people would say, oh, I want to walk through the heaven door, right? But they don't. Their hell is comfortable for most people because it's their will. It's what they want.

It's all the lies of the ego telling them, don't go that way. You know, this is what you really want. You want the big car and the big house and the big this and it's steeped in fear. But to go through that other door, the door of surrender, the door of all the things you want coming to you easily, takes work. It takes work and it takes honesty and it takes somewhat being, being somewhat fearless in your pursuit because we're all control freaks, right? We like to know what we're doing. We like to be in control, but to surrender and let go and take a step into maybe the unknown, that takes courage, but it's so worth it. It's so worth it. So much easier than citing. Well, it absolutely is. And as you said, you've got to take that first step. And if any of the

listeners have listened to many of these podcasts, I can't go very long without talking, but I think we're facing a national and international emergency caused by a few different contagions. And it's not COVID. It's the contagion of the human spirit and the contagion of the human mind. And those two things are apathy and comfort. And we are getting so wrapped up in those two things that were, we no longer, in many cases, have the courage to really go after business fatality, entrepreneurship, and taking the risks that made the United States and much of the Western

world the envy that it is. And if you look at what's happening now in Mexico, South America, Asia, it's almost a flip to where the United States was decades ago, with how much more work and dedication that they're putting in to chasing their dreams. So I think that whole surrender concept is a very good one. Right. Can I share a story with you about this very thing? I'm not a political person. I don't pick sides. I'm as far from politics as you could possibly imagine.

I live in a snow globe of my own making. No politics, no mean people. And the morning after Trump was elected four years ago, I woke up in tears. And it wasn't, it had nothing to do with the outcome of the election. Or who I wanted to be president. I didn't care, really. But I felt, I felt the shift. And I'm also a visionary. I've been having visions ever since I was a small child. All of them have come true, by the way. And I just, I felt the sadness. I just, I felt everything. And I also saw, visually saw the downfall of everything. I saw a full financial collapse of all of the systems. I felt the despair.

And I was like, one man can't do all of this. You know, that's not going to happen. And it did. And I didn't realize until COVID was well into way, I'm like, oh my god, this is what I saw. This is what I saw. I saw the pandemic. I didn't see the pandemic necessarily, but I saw the downfall and the despair of people, and especially the fine, it was a global impact is what I saw. This is not going to happen. And it did happen. But I also saw something after that, which was a massive change in how we operate in this world. And yes, I think we're hitting bottom. I think as humanity, we are hitting

our bottom. And there's only one way to go after you do that. And that's up. So just imagine if we all started surrendering to the greater good, what the world would look like? You know, I'm a hippie. I believe it. Well, you know, and I think compared to many parts of the world, we were fortunate in the United States in that our whole systems haven't shut down. I was interviewing someone yesterday in England and they're on there, I think, third shutdown. And this one is lasting, I think, throughout March. And it's had such an economic impact.

At least, we've been able to have more freedom here in the United States to go to work and do things like that. That said, this has had a dramatic impact on small business and has undoubtedly pushed us even further behind where we were in that rise of business fatality. So, well, I'll segue this into another one of the concepts that you like to talk about is that you can find a heaven on earth. So if we are hitting our bottom or let's say you're hitting a bottom in your life and your listener, how do you change that and create heaven on earth?

Well, there's a 12-step, to make that happen. And I'm just acceptance is a huge part of that. And just no one ever... But like, before you go down that path, you said that you would take the 12-step process and apply it to an entrepreneur. So let's take it down that angle. And if you were going to do that, what would be some of the steps for an entrepreneur and why do you think it fits for them? Well, first thing is getting our head around our control issues.

When we understand what we can control and what we can't, you'd be amazed at how many people spend so much energy, emotional energy, physical energy trying to control things they can't control. And entrepreneurs historically are control freaks. It's kind of what makes us entrepreneurs. We want to do something differently, right? So when we start really getting to a place of peace, I can't control this, but I can control whether I surrender or not. I can control whether I make this choice or that choice, and when you're surrendering, it's all the right choice. And also tapping into your consciousness,

knowing that there's something else running the show. Otherwise, it's ego, because there's two things. There's spirit or spirit led. You don't have to believe in God, you don't have to be religious, just a willingness to defer to something that might know better than your ego, because your ego will never point you in the right direction. As much as it's going to tell you, this is the right way to go, it's usually not. So paying attention to that and connecting with something more. Again, it could be your own conscious desires. That is something more. And doing the work, like, I don't know many entrepreneurs or people in general that don't bring all of their crap with them into their business. I see it over and over and over again.

I did. If I wouldn't have had some of the issues I brought into my business, I'd probably still have the business. Maybe I would have sold it for $50 million. I don't know. It's not going. But being aware that your own stuff,

you don't leave it at the door when you walk into the boardroom. It's there. So the sooner you can start looking at those things and those patterns, those faulty belief systems that are mostly lies, then you can start operating from a different operating system. And, you know, it's all about changing the patterns, changing the patterns and getting to a place of peace. And I can't stress enough how much acceptance for what is changes a person, you know, and

knowing that it's all going to happen and the divine timing of how it's supposed to happen. But don't be a salmon. Don't swim upstream, you know, don't do it. Just flow. It'll flow. It takes courage to flow. Yeah, it's, and I think a lot of what you're saying is truth. I can't tell you how many entrepreneurs I've seen that have failed because they're trying to self-serve. And most of the businesses that I see succeed and the people who succeed, it's because they're serving others.

And it's another chapter I wrote about, but I call it Inspire Outwards, but the chapter is people speak and act with their feet. And I got this concept from a good friend of mine, Jacek Gubinsky,, but you know, as we would back in the day, as we would launch a new initiative, he's like, don't watch what they're saying, watch what they're doing. And it's the same thing as being an entrepreneur. You can say one thing, but if your actions aren't, you know, following, you know, if you're not doing that outward, then you're not going to go anywhere. And it's almost like if you were going to do a charity, it's one thing talking about doing that charity. It's the other one who's building the beds, who's actually helping to build the beds that they're going to, you know, to deliver to the less fortunate type of thing.

Right. Right. Service is a huge part of that heaven-on-earth reality. That's that's which driven everything that I've done that's been good and successful and abundant in this world has come from a place of wanting to help others. And when I lost that, the abundance stopped flowing in a very real way. So yeah, doing just do the right thing. A lot of people don't, a lot of people do. So let's go into now. You talked about what was going on in your life. You went on Shark Tank, you know, that one message that you heard that the problem is you, you faced it for seven years. You know, what is the aftermath? So, you know, so how has your life changed now? And, you know, how has it changed for the better? My life on the inside has changed substantially, which has given me the perspective to see that heaven on earth

reality. And I'll explain what I mean by that. If you would look at my life and the events of it through your eyes, someone else's eyes, you would say, dear Lordwoman, how are you still standing? You would. I mean, after I left Fuzzy Buns in 2018, I left to start another consumer product company. It took me a year to develop the product, which was an underwear product for men and women with mild to severe incontinence, a real underwear solution. I'd been trying to do this for ages, but I never had the time. So I'm like, all right, I'm walking away from everything. I have some money coming in from a legal settlement that I've been fighting for seven years. Great. I was going to have the money to start this

business. Money comes in. I do the development. I take on a partner because I know where I'm not strong. We go through an accelerator. We spend another year putting all the pieces parts together in the meantime,'m running out of money and we find an investor in January of last year 2020 and he would have been a great investor you know he would have given us everything we needed to start the company. COVID happens. Oh well yes. He pulls yeah he pulls out and both my partner and I are flat broke at this time. Flat broke. We have no more money left. We're like, okay, we've got to start this business.

Go to market strategy is ready. So yeah, he pulled his money, his commitment out, and then a month later, my son died from suicide. I had that to keep it. Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. Thank you. And it's just been one thing after the next, after the next. But there was not one day that went by that I did not say, you know, lift up my hands and said,

whatever you will have of me, you know, and that's between me and God, like that I do call God at this point, spirit or whatever. I'm still saying whatever, because I don't know what it is. It's just incredibly powerful. And I would say whatever you have of me, you know, whatever, whatever you will have of me. And I'm talking about taking surrender to a whole different level. I'm like, you took my son, you took his dad, if you want me to, you can have me. You know, but if you need me to stay, please give me purpose. And I found purpose.

And my life changed. I let go of the underwear company for now. And I did nothing but take care of myself for six months. I took off to bring my youngest son to college in New York. Got rid of all of my stuff, gave my house to my daughter, not my house, but everything in my house to my daughter, and put everything in my car, and left, and grieved along the way, and was always put in the right places, whether it was a hike, or with people, or in a beautiful place.

Like, I really felt that the universe was taking care of me when I needed it the most. And I continued to surrender. You know, it's like I found a little job in like placid. I'm currently in the Adirondacks. And I was like, well, I think, you know, I can string two thoughts together now. My PTSD from suicide is getting a little bit better. Let me just get a simple job. And I put things out there and I got a simple job.

I was so grateful for that job. Gratitude, gratitude, gratitude, gratitude. Yes, I wanted to have a multi-million dollar company again, but I'm working in a retail store and I was so happy to be doing that and have money coming in that I could pay my rent and buy food with. That was great.

An employment was great too. And then it's like, well, this isn't really satisfying. Let me surrender some more. Maybe I'll throw out some resumes and see what happens. 300 resumes. I didn't think about it too much. I just sent out resumes. And I wound up getting the most amazing job

working with a woman that I knew and that I admired quite a bit, helping women and girls in India. She runs a nonprofit, but she hired me to build her for-profit leg of the company, which we're gonna be able to do even more with for women. And that was the seed of passion that I really wanted to do with the underwear.

I really didn't care about the underwear as much as I cared about what the impact I would be able to do for women, specifically sexual assault survivors, because that was my social mission with the company, how I was gonna be able to help them and inspire them and create better lives for them. And I'm able to do that.

The same things that I wanted to do with the underwear company, I'm doing for her. And I don't have the stress of owning my own company, which is fantastic. So, the universe, it hears those desires. It knows what you want and it knows what you need. And I'm in a beautiful place doing exactly what my heart has always wanted to do, which is be free and travel

and meet beautiful people and experience amazing things that sing to my soul. And I'm writing and I'm hopefully gonna publish this book within a year. There's still something for refusing to drown. That's my my memoir after losing my son. You know, I just I want to be a writer and I want to inspire people. And that's the desire and the passion that's been laid on my heart. And that's what my

life situations have created in me to do. And and that's where I am. And it's a beautiful, I have a beautiful life despite of everything that I've been through and other people can have it too. And what an amazing story and thank you for sharing it with us. If someone wanted to learn more about you or the things you're involved with or your podcast that you host, work, work and they learn more about you. While my podcast is called Refusing to Drown because it's exactly what I've been doing for 50 years and there's actually a free book. I don't think I'm going to publish, really do the publishing for my first book, which is called Superpowers for Entrepreneurs, which I'm changing to be called Entrepreneurship

Without Ego. If they want to read that book, it's a hundred and forty seven pages of really good concise. How to information to keep the ego, you know, where it needs to be and find some balance between spiritual practice, spiritual tools that will only do you good in your life. Not me, it's not going to do you any harm. They can download that for free on my website. There's, I'm selling absolutely nothing. People need to understand that. I'm selling absolutely nothing. People need to understand that. I'm not selling coaching or consulting. It's just free. I want people to be able to have access to that information that are not in 12-step groups. The steps have

been adapted for the entrepreneur. They're not necessarily the AA or other 12-step steps. They're specifically geared towards entrepreneurs to be able to harness that power and use it. Great. Well, I like to end the podcast by doing a rapid round. So I'm not sure if you need that, but I'm going to ask you four or five questions and I'm just wanting you to give the first answer that comes to your mind. Okay. What are three words that best describe being on Shark Tank? four or five questions and I'm just wanting you to give the first answer that comes to your mind.

Okay. What are three words that best describe being on Shark Tank? Intense, intimidating and terrifying. What is your kryptonite? Oh, my kryptonite. I don't even know if I want to say it's it's it's young attractive men But that's it. That's me. Oh, that's it. Yeah, I have some issues On that

Who is your favorite superhero opera? Oprah, okay If you were to colonize a new planet and could establish one law, what would it be? That everybody must meditate 16 minutes a day. Okay, and if you could meet anyone vision ever since I was 16 years old. I got a meter. Well, she is someone who has truly overcome the odds, faced her inner demons, conducted a mosquito audit, changed the way she was living her life, and you know, look at her now. So through inspiration. She is my inspiration, yes. Well, thank you, Tereson, so much for being on the show.

And there were so many bits of incredible wisdom that you shared today. And thank you for being vulnerable with the audience and sharing them. Thank you for having me. What an amazing episode with Tereson DuPoi. Oh my goodness, did she unpacked a lot of content that is just amazing for our listeners.

And it's so coincided with the message I have been preaching, it was uncanny. She talked about every one of the action shifts that are in the passion-struck framework. She discussed how she became a mission angler and changed her personal mission, not only when she was 25, but again, much later in her life after overcoming her adversity. And that's when she also reinvented her brand and changed the way she viewed herself and how others view her. She was a mosquito auditor and took out both the people, influences, and activities that were causing her to go down an adverse path. She used her inner voice to become a fear confrontor where she took on and it took her seven years to do so, her deepest fears, and then she became a perspective alterer, where she

took action to change the reality that was facing her. So much here. I hope you listen to it again, and I am so excited to share it with you. Thank you so much for joining us. A purpose of our show is to make Passion Go viral. By sharing the knowledge and insights you can use to unlock your hidden potential. To hear more, please subscribe to the show in iTunes Spotify Stitcher or wherever you listen to podcasts. If you'd love this episode we'd appreciate a five-star rating on iTunes where if you'd simply tell free of your

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for our next episodes, and remember, make a choice, work hard, and step into your sharp edges. Thanks again, and I'll see you next time.