Passion Struck with John R. Miles - Jen Gottlieb on How to Create Your Own Success by Being Seen EP 401

Episode Date: January 16, 2024

https://passionstruck.com/passion-struck-book/ - Order a copy of my new book, "Passion Struck: Twelve Powerful Principles to Unlock Your Purpose and Ignite Your Most Intentional Life," today! Picked by the Next Big Idea Club as a must-read for 2024. In this episode of the Passion Struck podcast, host Jon R. Miles interviews Jen Gottlieb, co-founder of Super Connector Media and author of the book "Be Seen." Jen shares her personal journey of finding success and authenticity by embracing her true self. Full show notes and resources can be found here: https://passionstruck.com/jen-gottlieb-create-your-success-by-being-seen/  Sponsors This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at https://www.betterhelp.com/PASSIONSTRUCK, and get on your way to being your best self. Brought to you by OneSkin. Get 15% off your order using code Passionstruck at https://www.oneskin.co/#oneskinpod. Brought to you by Lifeforce: Join me and thousands of others who have transformed their lives through Lifeforce's proactive and personalized approach to healthcare. Visit MyLifeforce.com today to start your membership and receive an exclusive $200 off. --► For information about advertisers and promo codes, go to: https://passionstruck.com/deals/ Unleashing Your Authentic Voice: Insights from Jen Gottlieb on Being Seen In my interview with Jen Gottlieb, she emphasizes the importance of believing in oneself and taking small action steps towards one's goals. Jen also discusses vulnerability's power and how authenticity can help individuals stand out in a crowded market. She encourages listeners to embrace their unique stories and experiences, as they are the key to connecting with others. Overall, Jen's message is about the power of being seen and its impact on personal and professional success. All things Jen Gottlieb: https://jengottlieb.com/  Catch More of Passion Struck My solo episode on Why We All Crave To Matter: Exploring The Power Of Mattering: https://passionstruck.com/exploring-the-power-of-mattering/ My solo episode on The Art Of Managing Toxic Family Using The Mosquito Principle: https://passionstruck.com/the-mosquito-principle-overcoming-toxic-family/ Discover my interview with Rory Vaden On How To Find Your Uniqueness And Exploit It In The Service Of Others: https://passionstruck.com/rory-vaden-how-to-find-your-uniqueness/ Don't miss my interview with Hilary Billings On The Psychology Of Attention, Mastering Short-Form Video, And Personal Brand Building: https://passionstruck.com/hilary-billings-psychology-of-attention/ Catch my interview with Jim Kwik On Unlocking Your Best Brain And Brightest Future: https://passionstruck.com/jim-kwik-unlocking-best-brain-brightest-future/ Listen to my interview with Rusty Shelton On How You Build Your Authority Advantage: https://passionstruck.com/rusty-shelton-authority-advantage/ Like this show? Please leave us a review here -- even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter or Instagram handle so we can thank you personally! How to Connect with John Connect with John on Twitter at @John_RMiles and on Instagram at @john_R_Miles. Subscribe to our main YouTube Channel Here: https://www.youtube.com/c/JohnRMiles Subscribe to our YouTube Clips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@passionstruckclips Want to uncover your profound sense of Mattering? I provide my master class on five simple steps to achieving it. Want to hear my best interviews? Check out my starter packs on intentional behavior change, women at the top of their game, longevity and well-being, and overcoming adversity. Learn more about John: https://johnrmiles.com/ 

Coming up next on Passion Struck. I'm very guilty of like saying like, oh, I can't do that. I'm not good enough. I'm not good at that. But if you just take the word yet and you tie it on to any sentence and you say, I'm not good at that yet. All of a sudden, you give yourself a little bit more like, you do it a little bit more courage. I'm not good at that. Yeah, because maybe you're not good at it. But you absolutely can get good at it. You absolutely can. And if you look backwards for proof that you are good at learning and implementing and sticking with the commitments that you make with yourself and you have done really awesome things in your life,

then you can always bring that part of you back. Welcome to PassionStruck. Hi, I'm your host, John Armeils. And on the show, we decipher the secrets, tips, and guidance of the world's most inspiring people and turn their wisdom into practical advice for you and those around you. Our mission is to help you unlock the power of intentionality

so that you can become the best version of yourself. If you're new to the show, I offer advice and answer listener questions on Fridays. We have long-form interviews the rest of the week with guest-ranging from astronauts to authors, CEOs, creators, innovators, scientists, military leaders, visionaries, and athletes. Now, let's go out there and become PassionStruck. Hello everyone, and welcome back to episode 401 of PassionStruck, consistently ranked

by Apple as the number one alternative health podcast. And thank you to all of you who come back to the show every week to listen and learn how to live better, be better, and impact the world. I have a special invitation for you. I'm excited to introduce our new Passion Struck Quiz. It's a unique opportunity for you to discover where you stand on the Passion Struck continuum. Are you an orchestrator, masterfully balancing various aspects of life with passion and purpose?

Or, are you a vanquisher? Conquering challenges and turning obstacles into opportunities. Take the quiz on passionstruck.com and find out which one resonates more with your journey to living a passion start life. If you're new to the show, thank you so much for being here, or you simply want to introduce this to a friend or family member, and we so appreciate it when you do that. We have episode starder packs which are collections of our fans' favorite episodes that we organize in a convenient playlist.

They give any new listener a great way to get acclimated to everything we do here on the show. Either go to Spotify or PassionStruck.com slash starter packs to get started. In case you missed it last week, I had three great interviews. The first covered the incredible story of Jen Drummond, who set a world record of becoming the first female to climb the seven second summits. Jen is the author of the new book, Breakproof, seven strategies to build resilience and achieve your life goals. I also did a bonus interview with Dr. Scott Rick, an associate professor of marketing at the University of Michigan's Ross School of Business.

Our interview focused on understanding the emotional causes and consequences of consumer financial decision making, with a particular interest in the behavior of tight wads and spendthrifts. Lastly, I interviewed Maria Menunas. Maria is a renowned television personality actress near your time's bestselling author and journalist. She has a deeply moving personal story of resilience, caregiving, and self-advocacy that we discuss. And if you like any of those three previous episodes or today's, we would so appreciate

you giving it a 5 star rating and review. They go such a long way in strengthening the passion, strong community where we can help more people to create intentional life. And I know we and our guests love to hear your feedback. Throughout the month of January is when you're the launch of my book, Passion Struck, I'm gonna feature guests who signify what it truly means

to live a passion struck life. Today, I'm honored to welcome Jen Gottlieb, a towering figure in the realm of personal branding and authentic communication. Jen, with her illustrious background as a VH1 host, Broadway actress and co-founder of Super Connector Media, brings a rich tapestry of experiences to the table. Her best-selling book, Be Scene, is not just a title, it's a manifesto for those seeking to make a genuine impact in their field. Our focus in our interview is a critical yet often underplayed element of

success, a power of authentic presence in both life and business. For those yearning to make real impact and forge lasting connections, this episode is a treasure trove of wisdom. You've got the ingredients for success, a stellar product, efficient processes, and dynamic marketing, but the secret sauce,

that genuine heartfelt connection with your audience. Authenticity isn't just an add-on, it's the core of a thriving brand, and today you're in for a masterclass and making that course stronger and more vibrant. In this episode, Jen will share insights that go beyond conventional branding strategies. You'll learn how to authentically show up for your clients and audience, creating a brand that resonates and endures.

It's not just about the mechanics of business, it's about building a narrative that speaks to the heart of your audience. A narrative where your authenticity is the protagonist. Jen's authority in this domain comes from her own journey, which she candidly shares offering strategies and lessons that are both relatable and actionable. From harnessing your unique story to engaging with your audience on a deeper level, Jen's guidance is a blend of personal antidotes and professional strategies. Expect to walk away from this episode with a clearer understanding of how to authentically

present yourself and your brand. Jen's advice will help you not just in being visible, but in being impactful, memorable, and genuinely connected to those you serve. So whether you're a budding entrepreneur, a seasoned business owner, or someone looking to elevate their personal brand, tune in for an enlightening session. Let's discover how to be seen, be heard,

and make a lasting impression in the world. Thank you for choosing Passion Struck and choosing me to be your host and guide on your journey to creating an intentional life. Now, let that journey begin. I am absolutely honored and thrilled to have Jen Gottlieb on Passion Struck. I have wanted to have you so long. Welcome. So excited to be here, John. Thank you for having me. I was introduced to you by a mutual friend, Dr. Gabrielle Lyon, whom you know really well, and we both know is a rock star.

How did you originally meet Gabby? People have been asking me this lately a lot, and I can't even remember the exact moment we met. I had been following Dr. Gabrielle years before she was my friend, just following her, listening to her on podcasts, consuming her content, and doing all of the things that she would talk about. And as a woman, doing the things that back in the day that Gabrielle was talking about was like not what all of my friends were doing.

I was eating lots of protein and lifting heavy weights and it transformed my life and my body completely. And so I was a fan of hers. And I can't tell you when the moment was that we actually met because it was probably a lot of different times and then social media and connecting and chatting online and chatting back and forth between comments and then officially seeing each other at some point in time.

It was one of those relationships where, I don't know if you've ever had this happen to you, the second that we connected really, we were like, wow, we are sisters from another time. We just felt that we connected really. We were like wow we are sisters from another time. We just felt so deeply connected immediately. And I've never had this happen before but we became best friends. I call her my best friend and we have just connected recently like this last year and she's one of the closest people in the world to me. So this is a really great example of how somebody that you follow online because I know she was following me and I was following her,

you can actually really create a real relationship with because you learn so much about them from them, putting out content. And then when you connect, it's fireworks. We became immediate besties. Yeah, I can relate to that completely. I know Gabby's husband's a seal, and I know a lot of them because I'm a veteran, but there was this one that I kept seeing pop up. And they do this big event every year here in Tampa where I live called the Frogman swim, which is to help give money back to the fallen from that seal community.

And I happen to meet him at this event and to me, he was larger than life, but we met and hit it off and it turns out he lived less than a half a mile away from me and so we become really great friends. So it's amazing when things like that happen. The best. So speaking of people, I have always wanted to meet. One of them happens to be Brittany Spears because I think she's such an interesting woman. And I understand you have an interesting story about impersonating her. Can you tell us about it?

Yes, for those of you that are listening to have no idea who I am or anything about my story, I just have to take that everybody back a second and share that I was on this TV show in BH1 about heavy metal music for five years. Well, many people used to know me as this heavy metal and a spoiler alert for anyone listening right now and even probably for you, John, I don't really like heavy metal music I never did.

I was an actress and I was auditioning to get gigs like every other actress in New York City does. And I came across an audition for a TV show on VH1. I thought it was a great opportunity and they said you had to be a sexy rock and roll girl. So I went in there to play the part of the sexy rock and roll girl. And I ended up getting this show that I

ended up changing the trajectory of my life forever for good. And of course, I wouldn't even say for bad, but for major learning experiences. But the way that I got this role was very ironic, because the day that I found out about this audition, I was like, you know what, I probably played this part of a heavy metal rock or chick, even though I don't know anything about metal,

because I was in the Broadway national tour of the Wedding Singer, which the Adam Salemoo be the Wedding Singer. And I played the role of Linda, which is the ex-girlfriend that Robbie Hart, the lead character has that leads him at the altar, and the character was very much a rock and roll girl. So I had played that role for so long.

So I was like, I could do this. I could go into this audition in a rocket. I just have to study. So the night before the audition, I spent the entire night googling metal music. I'm like, I'm gonna memorize all these bands and all these singers. And I'm gonna pretend that I know everything about this

so that I go into this audition and I am the most metal-shaked-in-the-veverment. And I'm like, up all my studies. I go into the audition and I am the most metal-shaked in the government. And I'm like, up all my studies. I go into the audition and they start asking me all these questions, like, what's your favorite band? And I'm like, forgetting everything. Because when you don't really believe something, it doesn't, it neatly come out of you.

So I had only been up about one night researching. And I'm like, I like poison and guns and roses. And I'm like, guessing all of these bands. I'm like, I like poison and guns and roses and I'm like guessing all of these bands. I'm like, I was totally bombing this audition. At this point, after they're done asking me about metal, in my mind, I'm like, I didn't get this. Forget it. I did not get this wall. And then they say to me, you're like, Jen, oh, I noticed on your resume that you do a great Britney Spears impersonation. And I had totally forgotten that I left that on the bottom

of my acting resume. Because usually on your acting resume, you'll put something fun and funny at the bottom. And I was like, that does not help with this audition to be a heavy metal girl or get it. I totally bomb maybe not get this part. And I was like, yeah, I do. I just took the mask down. I stopped trying to be a heavy metal girl. And I was like, yeah, I do. And I just immediately turned into real Jen, who I really was, because I was like, yeah, I do. And I just immediately turned into real Jen, who I really was, because I was like screwed, I didn't get it anyway. And they're like, can we see it?

Could you do your Britney? I'm like, sure. And I sang like Britney Spears. And everybody in the room is laughing hysterically. They think it's the funniest thing in the world. And I leave them like, I didn't get that. Because I like walk out into the waiting room and there's all these real metal girls, girls with full leg tattoos, and they look so cool,

and they really like metal music. I'm like, I just sing like Britney Spears, there's no way in hell I'm gonna get this part. And two weeks later, they call me and they're like, Jen, we wanna invite you to be part of that metal show. That's the name of the show, that metal show. I'm like, you do? They're like, yeah, honestly,

your Britney Spears' impersonation was so spot on and hilarious. And we just thought we would have so much fun with you. So we want to invite you to do it in the show. And I got the part. And this was the biggest reminder to me that I had to learn again and again after this, by the way, because even though I learned it then, it didn't really sink in.

But that whenever you're your most authentic self, whenever you just are your truth and you are who you are, usually people lean in them. So it wasn't until I broke down and I wasn't heavy metal girl and I was just me doing my silly Britney Spears impersonation. That was what got me this job. I run it, which was an important lesson to learn at that time. And I always go back to it now. I'm like, Jen, what's your Britney Spears right now? Like, how can you bring more real Jen to the people? I love it. And I used to do an impersonation of Jack Nicholas.

And I did one from him and the shining. And unfortunately sent a video this to a buddy of mine who's been holding it on as ransom ever since. But I can listen to you mean, Jack? Yeah. Who I said, Nick, Jack Nicholas. Yeah, I get it. Yeah, then he said the shining house like I think I get it Yes, yes, so I get it Well, we're gonna be talking a lot about your book be seen which the viewers can see right behind your shoulders

But before we touched on that I wanted to go Just a step further into your careers and actor. Because I heard you say on another interview with Amy Porterfield that while you were an actor, you got to hide behind the mask of the character that you were playing. And to me, it really resonated because I think so many people

today are living behind what I call a mask of pretence. And we're hiding who we truly are because we're trying to conform to so many things that we think we're supposed to be. What did you learn about yourself and that impact that the mask was having on you when you weren't showing up authentically? For me, the more that I hid behind this fake mask that I was wearing specifically when I was on the heavy metal show. The more I was in an internal battle with myself because I knew who I was. We know we are at our core, really. And when we're out of alignment with that and we're living, I was basically living in fear, right? Fear of people not liking me for who I really was. Fear of people not accepting me. Fear of not getting a job. Fear of not working. Fear of not being

good enough, not pretty enough, not anything enough. So I was like, okay, well as long as I can pretend to be whoever I need to be for you, then I'm protecting my real self from being vulnerable and being rejected or all of those things that I was afraid of. But deep down, every time I showed up as a version of me that wasn't an alignment with like who I really wasn't my four of, the girl who impersonates pretty spears or that wasn't an alignment with who I really wasn't my four of. The girl who impersonates pretty spears or that little girl that I was when I was five running around my living room singing and dancing and doing back flips and just being silly and letting my belly hang out and having a messiest hair and singing Annie and the

little mermaid. Like that's who I was. But every time I showed up and not being real me, I would feel this like number one and exhaustion. It's very exhausting to be someone that you're not. Because you have to keep up with the lie. You have to keep up with the presentation. And it's not authentic to who you are. So it's not easy.

It feels hard. And a lot of the time when people tell me that they're very burnt out from being on all the time, I'm like, then are you really being you? Because I know what that feels like. I felt burnt out all the time, I'm like, then are you really being you? Because I know what that feels like. I felt burnt out all the time. I was presenting something that I wasn't. So I was trying so, so hard every single day to keep up with this thing. And inside I was like, Gen, that's not you, that's not you. And I was fighting with myself. No, you have to keep this up because you have to be a good girl, you have to be a good actress, you have to do all the things that you're expected to do. This is better than what would happen if you have to do all the things that you're expected to do.

This is better than what would happen if you didn't do it, right? All of the fear of me unknown always got to me as well. And then there was also this voice inside of me that was saying to me like, Jen, what's going to happen when all this goes away? What's going to happen when the show gets canceled? Then what are you going to do? What's going to happen when this job ends and you have to find another job and you have to keep being somebody that you need to be for everybody else.

And it got really dark because it's just a really rocky place to be in. I can't even find the words right now to describe the way that I felt it was just not solid. I just felt like I was floating everywhere and being everything that everybody else wanted me to be. And it was so unbelievably exhausting and then terrifying because you're always wondering, oh my God, are they going to find out that this isn't really who I am. And when you're out of alignment, it often, and you can't get back into alignment on your own, it often happens on it. So I believe that God or the universe, whatever you believe in steps in, just like, you know what? This is not working. So I'm just going to blow this out, but I'm going to force you to find out who you really are. And that's what happens to me. Everything pretty much blew up. The show got canceled, as I always knew that it would eventually one day, but I never prepared for it. The guy that I was dating that was totally not right for me, and I knew

in my gut, but I stayed because I was afraid. Another part of that out of alignment situation that I was in. But he left me for one of our friends and totally dumped me and left me, and then I was single. And I had been very depressed during that time. So I had spent the majority of my money. I wasn't saving. I was partying a lot. I was lost. And I pretty much had to start over.

And I found myself in this tiny little room in this apartment with six other actors that lived there. And I had this window that faced a brick wall. And I had nothing. I had no relationship. I had no job. I had no idea who the hell I was anymore. And I didn't know what I wanted to do with my life.

And I knew what my passion was. I knew I loved performing. But I didn't know if that was the purpose. I didn't know how to do that without losing myself again. And so I couldn't have been more stuck in loss. And when we started this conversation, you said a lot of people that are listening to this feel very stuck. And I can relate to that so much, because I had never felt so more stuck in loss. And when we started this conversation, you said a lot of people that are listening to this feel very stuck.

And I can relate to that so much, because I had never felt so stuck in my life. I was like, what do I do from here? Yeah, and I want to just go in on that a little bit more, because I think a lot of people are feeling this way, and we're stuck for a variety of different reasons. But I think some of the biggest ones are fear and self-doubt. It's something that you talk about a lot in the book. But when you were at that lowest level,

when you didn't know what to do, I think so many people get paralyzed because they try to overthink or maybe believe that the action that they need to take is life altering or it's this huge gigantic step. When I really believe it's just the tiny choices, the tiny habits we build, the micro choices that really get us started in a different direction. For you, what was it that allowed you to make that change? Yeah, it was literally one second at a time, one moment at a time, one action step at a time. If you were to ask me to sit there and think about it and get clear on it and then create a plan, it would have never been the trajectory that I ended up going on, which was the best ever for me. I would have never found this path or what I'm doing right now, if I would have just sat around and thought about it and planned it out and mapped it out perfectly. And I think that's a big mistake that a lot of people make.

They're like, I can't take action until I have the perfect plan in place. I had no idea what the hell I was doing. I just tried stuff. I just really tapped in. I was like, what am I good at? What do I know that like is super power of mine? And what if I always wanted to do? And what if I just went and tried it and I just at one day at a time

Went and started trying thing and I remember I was at my darkest moment right after that happened and I was in a really deep depression and my mom Had to come into the city my mom lived outside of New York in Long Island and I lived in Manhattan and she came in and she's I got to help you like what's going on and She gave me this book my mom was very into personal development at the time and I hadn't and she came in and she's, I gotta help you, what's going on. And she gave me this book, my mom was very into personal development at the time that I wasn't. And I was like not open to anything personal development. I was very much the opposite of what I am now.

And she gave me this book called You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay and it's a book full of affirmation. And I didn't know what an affirmation was, nor did I want to say any affirmation in order that I believe in the power of affirmation. But my mom knew that my mom's very intuitive, especially with me. And inside the book, I opened it when I got home.

And she had photocopied one of the affirmations for me because she knew I wasn't going to open the book. And on the back of the affirmation that she photocopied, she wrote me a letter. And essentially it said, Jenny, I hope you find yourself again. And I said to myself on that day, I was like, I'm not going to read this book. I'm not, I'm just going to take this affirmation. I'm going to put it on my refrigerator

and I'll just read this every day, no matter what. No matter if I believe it or not, I don't care. I'm just going to read the stupid thing. And I don't know if it was the affirmation that changed anything in my brain, but I do believe that it was one action step that I took every day that created a little bit of momentum for me. It gave me a little win, just getting up every day and reading it, just the act of that of committing to myself that I was going to do something and following through, getting up, reading the affirmation. That alone, setting that commitment with myself and winning on the other side, then, okay, I did it. I don't feel that much better, but I did it. Okay. That got me to maybe taking that next little step and getting outside of my apartment

and like going to the gym and figuring out, now maybe I want to be a personal trainer. I'm networking at the gym and getting a personal training job. And then that little win got me to starting to dive into personal development a little bit more and going to Barnes & Noble and reading all these books and listening to podcasts. It was one step at a time. It wasn't like I figured it all out and went. It was like one little tiny action step and the crazy thing about this whole story. You really want to connect the dots looking backwards. This is wild.

You can hear your life was written by a woman named Louise Hay. And she's an author that wrote a bunch of personal development books. She eventually created a publishing house called Hay House. And it's one of the biggest publishing houses for personal development books in the world now. And this book behind me, when I wanted to get a major publisher for it. And I was working with my agent pitching it to a lot of publishers. One of the publishers that we had on our list was Hangout. And I was able to get on a call with this team and

explain how Louise Hay essentially changed my life or she was the stepping stone. And that's why this book is here. And Hey House Published Mythos. You never know how the dots are going to connect when you look backward. And I always love telling that story because it was such a just a beautiful reminder that you might not know where the journey's going to take you. But if you can just get that little win that day,

that little tiny little bit of belief or that little action step that's going to create that little boost of momentum, that might lead you down a different path or might lead you to take another action step that makes you believe a little bit more and that might lead you to a different, it's something different that you never would have imagined. You're never going to get there. If you just sit around and think about it because we can't even imagine what it could possibly turn

into. But you can't think your way there. You can act your way there. You can do your way there. And that's essentially what I did. Well, thank you for that because I think people think that it's going to be so difficult for them to pull themselves out of where they're at. And I was recently talking to Hal Elrod. And I was talking to him about how I implemented the miracle morning and one of the most crucial steps for me was the gratitude practice. And it's literally in the first five minutes when I wake up, something that I do every day

because if I'm going to live a day, I want to live it at excellence. But I use that as a chance to give myself gratitude for what I've accomplished, but to look forward and ensure that I'm intentionally setting up the day I want to live it. So I think that's such an important point. And I, we're going to talk about rejection a little bit later. But for me, when I was trying to get my book deal, Hey House was the publisher I wanted as well. And unfortunately, I didn't even get a call from them. But Wayne buyer has really influenced my life and is very tied to that company as well. And so is the person who did your forward.

I just got finished reading Gabby Bernstein's latest book, Happy Days, and one of the things I love about her book is how vulnerable she is, and she really talks about self-worth. And for her, she didn't feel that self-worth, she didn't have that self-love, and so it was leading her to a bunch of destructive patterns. How closely tied is our self-worth to our authenticity? I can't, I'm on an expert on self-worth at all or even trauma or any of those things.

I've got to be the book, change my life, happy days, I thought it was phenomenal. But for me, I always like to just put it in a be point of my experience. Myself word, I never, if you don't believe that you're worthy of something and you're constantly telling yourself that you're not worthy of it, or you can't do it, or it's going to be harder, then that's going to be a reality. We can't necessarily change the things that are happening. life gets really lighty and shit hits the fans sometimes and things happen and that can knock down our beliefs. It can and it can make us feel like we're not worthy and it can make us feel like crap. However, what do we want our relationship with that to be? My therapist always asks me, all right, we can't necessarily control what you've had. Okay, we can't control that right now, you feel like shit about this specific situation. But what do you want your relationship with this all to be? What do you want your perspective of this to be? Because you can decide if it's really hard and you're not worthy of

moving through this and you're not good enough to move through this or you can decide that you are a powerhouse and you can look back and think about all of the times in your life when you move through every difficult situation no matter how hard it was and you came out of hand the other side and you can go into the situation with a relationship of, you know, what, bring it on. I'm gonna invite every single moment into my life that's crappy because I know that it's teaching me something. I don't want it, but I'm gonna invite it in if it happens. And I'm gonna allow myself to have a relationship with it.

That's one of, I believe in myself. I believe that I can move through this. And I believe that I have what it takes. And I think that that is a combination of really looking back and celebrating what you've done in your life. That's why I write about the fat ass list in chapter four. So unbelievably important. Remembering what we're capable of. Remembering the amazing things that we've done in our life, just to remind ourselves how wonderful we are because sometimes we forget we'll be

spending a lot of time on the internet comparing ourselves to other people. And our self-worth can get bashed down a couple of knots. But we get to decide, what do I want my perspective of this to be? What do I want my relationship with this situation to be? And do I believe that I'm capable of moving through it? And if you look for proof in your past, you'll usually find it. And if you, I also am playing a lot with them

with the word yet, I love this concept. I've been using it a lot lately, because I'm very guilty of saying, oh, I can't do that. I'm not good enough at that. I love this concept. I've been using it a lot lately because I'm very guilty of saying, oh, I can't do that. I'm not good enough at that. I'm not good at that. But if you just take the word yet and you tie it on to any sentence and you say, I'm not good at that yet. All of a sudden, you give yourself a little bit more like you can do it a little bit more courage. I'm not good at that. Yeah, because maybe that's good at it. But you absolutely can get good at it. You absolutely can.

And if you look backwards for proof that you are good at learning and implementing and sticking with the commitments that you make with yourself and you have done really awesome things in your life, then you can always bring that part of you back. And you can always implement into, listen, I'm not a morning person yet. I am now, but I used to say I'm not a morning person.

But if I would just, and I would just remove that even today I just moved to Florida from New York literally last and I always had this limiting belief and I don't know if this is a self-worth thing or I don't know where I'm from but I had this limiting belief in my mind that I could never live anywhere other than New York City I had tied my identity to New York. I'm a New Yorker through and through. I will never leave New York. I, and I, how many times do a day do we do this? Do we tie our identity to something?

And we say we could never do something, or we could only do this, or it will only work this way for us, this way. I do that all the time. And I moved myself so well, because I said I could never move out of New York City and I forced myself to do it. And now I'm here and I've evolved into a completely different version of who I've ever thought I could be because I'm like, oh my god, I love Florida.

I proved my limiting belief off. And now I'm like, oh, this is what else can I prove wrong to myself? What are the limiting beliefs do I have? What are the things that my saying to myself that are just so not true? What other ways am I just devaluing myself every day because I'm not even giving myself the opportunity to say yes. What if you just said yes? I'm not a person that could live in Florida yet, but maybe what if we added a little bit more maybe to our life? And what if we just got a little bit more curious and asked ourselves, what do I want my relationship with this limiting belief to be? Or I want it to be like, you know what, bring it on, let's go.

I understand that this is something that maybe was planted in me from trauma when I was a kid, some kind of situation that happened in my life, but what if? Just maybe I could take one little different action set today and I could prove this wrong. And I could prove to myself that I'm something so much more than I ever believed to be true. Yeah, I love what you're saying. I lived in Austin, Texas, Florida, moving to Florida. And I thought when I was there, there's no way I could ever leave Austin. Nothing is ever going to be as great as this. And then I moved to St. Petersburg, Florida, which was Austin 15 years ago, people like to say, it's becoming it more and more, but decade plus later, I don't look back with any regrets. I've loved

every minute that I've been here. And I hope you love South Florida as well. I saw one of your posts with a palm tree in the back in the beach. And I'm like, she now sees it and she gets to experience it. I remember getting back to your done list. I interviewed when I just started this podcast out, an Australian influencer named Trabbel, who goes by the bucket list guy. I love his website. And I was asking him about the bucket list. And I said, what is the most profound teaching that you do? And he said, it's my advice around the reverse bucket list because so many people focus on the bucket list and they don't put enough emphasis on the reverse bucket list. And the reverse bucket list are all those things that used to be on the bucket list that we've already accomplished throughout our life, that we don't revisit, reflect upon, and give ourselves credit for. And I think it weaves really nicely into the I've done list. Yes, when we do that, how does reflecting

on what we've accomplished contribute to our personal growth? Well, for me, I created this bad-ass list by accident, just trying to help a friend because she was experiencing in foster syndrome in a really big way. And I will never forget this moment. We were on the phone. She was my accountability buddy in life and business.

And we would just get on the phone every single week and hold each other accountable to our goals. And she was gonna launch this course. And I had always looked at this girl as like, such a rock star. She was so on top of it, she was such an amazing coach, she had built this whole beautiful online business and she was so much further along than I ever was and I always looked at her in awe. She could do anything and she was so impressive to me. And here she was on the call with me on

the phone crying and so worried about launching this product that she was launching for the first time. And she was like, I don't think I can charge this much money. I can't do it. I'm gonna pull the plug. I don't wanna do this. It's gonna fail. And just freaking herself out and really going into the depths of an impostor's intro.

I'm just not good enough talking about self-work. There was none there for her in that moment. And I'm not looking at her thinking about her and my mom and talking to her. And I'm like, this is impossible. I like it. I think you were such a badass. You are incredible.

I don't think you see yourself the way that I see you. So I said to her, I was like, Tori, and you just do me a favor, a real quick. Let's play a game. I want you to make a list of all of the amazing things that you've done. All the moments when you felt like you were a badass or you felt really accomplished or you felt really awesome because I could think of a bunch of them in my mind. But I think she was forgetting. She starts making this list and she starts telling me all these amazing things. She's that nice. I knew about what she forgot. She's going and she's going striding down. I'm like, go read those to me now.

And she starts reading them to me. She, this girl, ran the New York City marathon. She had made hundreds of thousands of dollars in her business. She had moved to New York five of some. She was on a New York City billboard as a model. She's done all these incredible things. And I'm like, okay, if you were reading this about somebody else, would you be impressed with them and this person, if it wasn't you, isn't he? Yeah. And I'm like, all right, is this person worthy of launching the course that you're afraid to long-term now, if that was not you, it was a different person, just hold on. I'm like, that's you.

And she was like, you're right. And it was a complete reframe. And I was like, oh my God, I'm gonna do this too. This is the best. This is the best. We're gonna always remind ourselves of it. Because it's not necessarily just reflecting on your wonderful moments.

That's great. It's self-distant in yourself from it. It's reading it as if you're reading it about somebody else. Because sometimes when we think about ourselves, we're just too close to our experiences, and they don't seem as cool. And we spend a lot of time on the internet scrolling and comparing ourselves to other people.

And thinking that other people have got it all going on, and they've got the best lives and the best businesses, because they're showing their highlight rail. And we forget how awesome we are because we don't look at ourselves that way. So my badass strategy instead of like reverse bucket list I think is amazing and reflecting on all the wonderful things you've done but what if you were to read those things as if you were reading about somebody else and being truly impressed with someone else that did all those things and then remember oh that badass that badass, that's me.

That's me. I love that advice. And I wanna go deeper into authenticity. And I wanna just share a story about myself and then have you maybe comment on it. I remember when I was starting out on this whole path, I had started writing the manuscript or the book that I've got coming out in February

and I was putting together the book proposal and I started circulating this to agents and the agents all started coming back to me with the same message. You had this amazing corporate career as a senior executive but unfortunately you have no personal brand. You're known because you were the CIO of Dell, where you were a partner in a big four consulting firm or you've done private equity work, but no one knows what you're really about.

So how do we know that anything you're going to say is going to resonate with anyone? And I remember when I heard that and I was starting out, I was agonizing about finding my uniqueness and how do I stand out. And out of the millions of influencers that are out there, the self-help people, the authors, I started to think, how do I differentiate myself? And I am a big fan of Lewis House and I have always

listened to the School of Greatness. And one day, he was having a conversation and it happened to be with a friend of mine, Rory Vaden, and Rory, who you may know, makes this statement that you are best positioned to serve the person you once were. And a light bob went off, and that was authenticity as a superpower in me trying to help the people who my once was. Using that as an illustration, in what ways do you think individuals can leverage their authenticity

as a superpower in personal branding? Yeah, well, your personal brand is you. And there's thousands, maybe millions of other people out there that talk about personal development. There's millions of doctors, there's millions of interior designers, there's millions of experts in fitness and health and wellness and nutrition. There, you can find an expert on absolutely anything. There's probably somebody that does the exact same thing as you.

But the good news is that the way to stand up from the crowd is to lean into more food you are because there's only one you. There are so many other things about it. The reason that you like Lewis is probably because of all of the unique things that Lewis is. Lewis is story of being an athlete, the way that Lewis communicates, the way that he asks questions, the fact that he is like a football player and like all the things that are unique to his

stories, probably one of the reasons why you follow and listen to him. And a lot of people, the more that you lean into your story, John, like when you just said that you were the CIO of Dell, I leaned in a little bit. I didn't know that. That's so cool. That's unique. You bring a different perspective than everybody else in the personal development space, because you have that experience and corporate. That's unique to you and nobody else. The way that you communicate. Like for me, I used to try to be like somebody else all the time. I was like, I need to be this way for people to like me. I need to be all like buttoned up or I need to be actually the opposite. More metal, more of a great personality.

But I realized that the thing that was gonna make me stand out is just being more Jen, being like the way that I am, the fact that I have three dogs and I'm from New York and I love lifting weights and I love watching baking shows but I don't bake and I don't cook. And like all the weird things that make you you, those are the things that people are going to actually want be connected to more so than anybody else. The more unique you can be to who you truly are, the more you're going to connect with an audience that loves you for you, that's going to follow you along your journey and be like, you know what?

No, the person that I follow, her personal development is John, because I resonate with him on so many levels. And that's my person. If you're all things to all people, then you're not going to get as deep or as strong of a following as if you are like super unique to you. And maybe you turn off some people. And that's okay. That's amazing. And those people are going to follow someone else that they resonate with more. But at least you're going to attract the people that are really like into who you are. And connect with you. And you're going to be able to help them even more because they resonate with your story, with your uniqueness. I love that story and I'm going to touch on it with another story of mine that I think

will amplify this. I remember when I started out this podcast, I was being coached by a woman named Hillary Billings. I don't know if Hillary, she was Miss Nevada way back in the day, but she is an expert on TikTok and short form videos. But she was listening to my podcast, and she started to say, John, you on these shows are trying to act like your Jay Shetty or Lewis House or Ed Millett or whoever it may be, Tom Billy, you, but you're not showing up as yourself. And she was absolutely right.

And when I started to do that, it was as if a hockey stick went off because I leaned into that and I leaned into my uniqueness. And I have to tell you, Mac, we yesterday, we were ranked in the top 50 podcasts in the United States. We have 150, 200,000 downloads per episode now. But I really, when people ask me why has it been so successful, it's because I think I leaned into that uniqueness. And I started just pressing for better or for worse, I'm just going to be myself because I think people want to hear the vulnerability from the person that they're talking or who's talking who is then going to get them to either they're going to like your stories or they're

not. And you just have to be happy with that. Yeah, or we don't have to be happy, but you just have to be like, okay, this is what it is. But honestly, people like to follow people they can connect with. And the more vulnerable you are, the more you open up, the more people can connect with you. It doesn't mean that you have to share everything in the world.

I actually have a whole chapter in my book about when not to be seen. So I think people get this wrong sometimes, or like, Oh, Jen, do I have to share everything in my life in order to be authentic? No, absolutely not. But it's showing up just as you are, like just being yourself and bringing your unique story to the table. I think that there are,

literally there is only one person on this planet with your unique story, John. And the more that you can share that and the more that you can shine of that, really, really brightly, the more people are gonna be like, wow, I follow them because I'm so touched by his story. And it resonates with me.

And I've seen myself in that story. And for me, there's going to be a lot of people that don't like my stuff or don't like, here's a great example. I dress a certain way when I speak on stage. I don't know if you saw any of these posts, but I've had major speaking engagements that did not get booked, stages that fully rejected

me and they said, we can't have her on our stage because she dresses to what a quote provocatively to be on our stage. And honestly, there was a split second where I was like, oh my God, do I need to change the way that I am to start really building my speaking career? And I thought about it for a second. And then I was like, you know what, my whole thing is to teach people to be exactly as they are. And there's gonna be stages that just doesn't align and they don't get it. And that's totally cool.

And that's totally okay. I'm gonna keep being myself and doing that and consistently sticking with that and just wearing my outfits and what is provocative anyway. I don't care, but it doesn't matter. Wearing the outfits that I wear has actually now been a reason why people have been hiring me. Because it's become a thing.

They're like, what's Jen gonna wear? If I would have just transformed that for what everybody wanted me to be at a book stages and been what they needed and more really like the whatever, not Jen outfit, then I don't think I would have built the strong brand that I've built where people are now asking me to speak because they're excited about the cute whatever whatever out there outfit I'm going to wear. Yeah, it's so interesting. You

bring that up. I don't know if you know who Christina Mann Lachoyani is. She co-founded Vine Valley. And I was talking to her about her keynote speeches and she said one of the first ones she had to give she had to follow one of the biggest influencers that there is and she wouldn't tell me who it was. I think it was Tony Robbins by the, she was describing this person, but larger than life, used their presence to control the crowd, et cetera. And she said, I'm sitting back there and having this agony, do I completely change my approach because I'm nothing like that? And she started to think about it as she was getting on the stage and she was really nervous.

And then she looked out on the stage and she said, ultimately, I am not here for me. I am here to serve this audience. And the best way that I can serve them is by being who I am because that's who I'm most comfortable being. And she said she went up there on the stage, gave a completely different talk, one that was just really rooted in raw vulnerability, a much softer tone, but possibly a more authentic tone. And she ended up getting a standing ovation. And she said from that point forward, she just learned that she really needed to lean in on that because that's who she is. And

she didn't need to try to pretend to be someone else. So I think your advice on that is great because that's who you are. And people are either not going to like it or they're going to love it. And the people who love it are going to want more and more of it. So thank you for sharing that. I love that story.

That makes me feel so much better. I actually talk about this a lot too. There's never, I speak on a lot of stages because a lot of men. It's just an often a situation that I find myself in where I'm one of the only women and I'm always following very strong men on stage. And I love that you share that with me because there's always a moment and this is always happens to me where for a second I'm like, do I need to change my talk right now? I think I do. Two seconds before, because the guy that had my letsbook before me or Eric Thomas, these guys that have this amazing keynote that they do, but it's a totally different energy and I immediately think, oh my god, I need to totally change everything that I have talked about. This has happened to be so many times.

And now one of my free show rituals I've had to implement is to save myself every time before I go on stage no matter who goes before me is Jenny Bemore-You. Be more you. Be more you because it's not about me. It's actually what I can give to them. And I do that for an info-complete person every day. If I'm obsessed with getting on stage

and being more like what was just before me because I'm so insecure in the way that I might show up and I might not be good enough for these people or they might not like it because they just like something different before me, then I'm not going to help anybody. But if I just go on just like what you just said, I and just focus on helping them and doing what I do best in order to help that one person in the room that needs to hear what I have to say that they have to be more just who I am and not try to be like anybody else. That's so common, especially with the world that we live in with social media, wanting to seeing something like, oh, I shouldn't do it my way, I should do it this way, this way's

really better. But instead of doing that, looking inward and being more curious and tapping back into it, it's the superpower that I have that's unique. And that, like what you said earlier, what Rory always says is you're the most equipped to help the person that you used to be. Think about that person on the other side of the film. Think about that person in the audience that you're talking to in that moment. And if you just focus on helping them and doing whatever, it's like letting go of what you look like, what you sound like. If you're saying the right thing,

or not, you just focus on helping that person, usually the authentic truth will come out if we are. Because when we're just having a conversation with a friend and we're just meaning it and we're just talking to them and helping them, we're our most authentic self. We're not thinking about trying to be like anybody else. We're just pouring into that person trying to help them. And that's usually the most powerful thing that we can do. I love that. I want to talk to you about a couple more things that I think listeners might really be struggling with. And one of those is rejection. And I'm gonna start this out again by being vulnerable about myself.

I cannot tell you how many agents rejected me when I was trying to get my book, how many publishers rejected me, how many podcasts I've been trying to get on that have rejected me, people who I've even had on my show aren't getting back to me. And it goes well beyond there. People see the've even had on my show aren't getting back to me. And it goes

well beyond there. People see the show and they're like, how do you get these amazing guests? Well, what they don't realize is that I've tried to get on Gabby Bernstein. I've tried to get on Mel Robbins, Amy Porterfield, Renee Brown, Lewis Hous, Jay Shetty, Ed Millett, Hillary Swink, Matthew McConney. I could go on and on. They've all said no. Gabby said no 12 times. I feel someday she is going to be on the show because I think sometimes things just happen when the timing is right. But how does someone who is facing rejections like this understand that rejection is a form of inter-resilience

and that inter-resilience drives us eventually to have greater opportunities that open up for us. Yeah, rejection really sucks. I'm just gonna say it, because I don't wanna sit here and say, you gotta just get over rejection, because that would be silly, because every time I get rejected,

which is often, very often, just like you, when I was pitching my book, I get rejected, which is often very often, just like you, when I was pitching my book, I got rejected from a lot of podcasts. I got rejected from a lot of publishers before I got my yes from him. I got rejected when I was an actress, I basically spent every single day getting rejected every day, all day. Rejection, after rejection, I read all my old journals from that time in my life, and I feel sad for my old self because I would be like, I got rejected for the 20th time today. When is this ever going to work for me? Like I just keep hearing no. And I never want to take that away from people that stays. It sucks. It doesn't feel good. But let's go back to what we were talking about earlier when this whole concept of when you want

your relationship with that to be. So we can't control when we get those nose. We can't control it. We can't control that it feels shitty when you get a no when you get rejected. It's not a good feeling. But we can shift our relationship to that rejection. We can actually like what I've learned to do over time is I have a relationship now with rejection where I'm like, we're ranked. Reject me these? I am adding up all of these rejections because I can't wait for the moment when you are calling me, asking me to do your show when you rejected me so many times before.

I actually have flipped my relationship with this, not overnight, but with a lot of practice to make it so that it fuels me, knows fuel me. Every time you tell me no, it's just like, I'm so excited because I know that no is secretly a yes to something else in the future. And the only way that I was able to realize that for myself was to immediately connect the dog's looking backwards

and look back to every single no that I ever got in my past. And I'm almost really just really curious about how did that no eventually turn into a yes. And you can always find the yes. The boyfriend that broke up with me. Thank God he did. Thank God he left me for one of my friends. I thought because I wouldn't have met my husband that I'm married to now, which is my soulmate and my business partner. And I'm not saying that one can make the best things out of everything because something's just up. But if you really look and you really become a detective and you really understand, okay, what happened as a result of this now? Did I actually

become a more resilient person because I got that rejection? Did that actually put another freaking notch in my belt that, you know what, I'm strong, I can get through this because every single time you move through any uncomfortable moment you become a little bit stronger, you become a little bit more resilient. So the more knows that I've heard in my life, the more resilient of a person I've become. So now I the more resilient I'm a person I've become. So now I'm like, I'm a champ at getting rejected. Tell me no again and again. And here's another tool that I use now.

This is a little people think I'm crazy for doing this. But I do it and it helps me so much. I have an album in my phone called Rejection Emails. Now it is Rejection Emails in Texas. It's a special album in my photos. And every time someone emails me and says, no, thank you, or we're going to pass or maybe next time. I screenshot it and I add it into my album and I have this whole collection.

It's a very big collection of rejection. And I do that because it helps me shift my relationship with that rejection. I'm adding it in. I'm adding it to the album up. Got another one in there. This is just making me even more resilient. Here's another point for me in my resilience moving forward. And then a really cool thing can start to happen eventually because I've been doing this for a long enough now. Then now I go back into that album and I look at some of the older rejections from years ago and I'm like, wow, they rejected me then but look at how they want me back now. Or look at how this rejection actually turned into a relationship or turned into an opportunity

or if I would have done that, I wouldn't have gotten this and I can connect the dots and I can see why that rejection was so unbelievably important. And maybe you can believe whatever you want, everything happens for a reason or maybe not, but either way, it helps me with my relationship with it, to be able to go and look back and understand why and connect the dots. And again, it's made me so resilient. And when people tell me, no, like, I'm just, yes, it's things for a second, but I'm way faster to be like, I'll prove you wrong.

Can't wait until I'm so expensive that you can't afford me next time. I mean, I just say that in my mind, put it in my rejection album and move on. And then I try to prove them wrong. It fuels me. Thank you so much for sharing that, Jen. And another topic I think that's important for people to understand is networking. And I am like you. I'm an introvert.

I have been known to be good at networking, but I have to tell you at those events, I come out of them and I am just absolutely exhausted and I dread them. And I recently had one of these events about six weeks ago, I had interviewed Jim Quick. He's John, why don't you come down to Miami, you're close. I got this book launch coming. And so I said, yes, I'll be there, Jim. And I walk into this event and I know I said, yes, I'll be there Jim and I walk into this event and I know maybe five people out of the 300. Yes. Yeah, I was there.

Yeah, I was there and I said, coming into this and I know you use this philosophy, which I want you to explore a little bit more. I said, I had three goals. One was to do a bunch of selfies, which I didn't achieve. I didn't achieve that goal. So I still regret it. But the bigger goal was I wanted to get three books away to people who I thought it would bring meaning to. And I was able to do that. And then I wanted to make three new connections that I didn't have before. And I was able to do that. And then I wanted to get out of the event three to four people to come on the podcast

who I'd never met before. And I accomplished all those goals. And to me, it's going into them with an outcome that I can feel good about the time that I put into that is so important. And this is something that I think you believe in as well. Yes, I'm also an introvert. here's the thing you got another person from not party on tear podcasts without even talking to them.

So that was me. There's another win for you. Yeah, one of my roles for networking for me as an introvert is not rules, but strategies is to always go in with a goal because what I used to do is I would go into a networking event and I would just be like, Hudson around. around. Okay, let's, something's going to happen or when can I leave. The worst part is when can I leave? And then if you leave too early, you've got FOMO or you feel like, oh, maybe I should have stayed longer. But when you go in with a goal and you got, okay, my goal is to connect with three people here and get three people onto the projects. When you've done that, you feel like you won.

You went for a reason, you had your intention, you did the thing you needed to do, and then you can leave feeling great about it. And every introvert's favorite moment of the night is when you can leave and feel amazing about what you did in the room, right? I love making connections. I love it. I love things that happen with connections. I love my dear friends. I love conversations like this, but I'm not so excited to go. I never really want to go, but I'm always happy I went. So when you go in with a goal, you have that amazing feeling. When you leave that you accomplished your goal, you're like, okay, I did the thing. I went to the event and that feels good. And then you want to go to another one later because you remember the good feeling. Not like, oh, I went, I touched around. I don't really know if I did anything. And then I left. And I think I left a little too early.

And then you feel bad about it. And then you don't want to go to the next one. Going with a goal, succeed at your goal and then leave. And you'll always have a positive experience at a networking event. And if you're really introverted, make your goal super easy. Get there, stay for an hour and talk to two people. And one of the other tips that I have for networking as an introvert is to make it super, super easy for introverts that don't love talking about

themselves is whenever I go to a networking event, I always just think of like how can I be the most interested person in this room instead of trying to be interesting instead of talking about myself? How can I go in and be unbelievably curious and figure out how I can help people here? When you go in with that mindset and you just ask a lot of questions and you try to find out what people need help with and you become a detective and you get really curious and you ask question. Not only do you figure out a lot of really amazing things about people that you can provide value to them with when you leave because the most important part of any networking situation is the follow-up. So I'm always thinking about clues for the best follow up.

How do I follow up with somebody with value? Well, you got to figure out what they need to help with. And then also, you don't have to really talk about yourself that much because you're asking a lot of questions. And then the last thing, and most important thing is everyone's favorite topic is themselves. So if you give people an opportunity to talk about themselves and you ask them questions

and you genuinely are curious about them, they're going to feel so seen and so loved and so valued by that conversation but they're going to leave that event remembering you and they're going to be like oh my god I love John that was my favorite conversation of the night and you probably didn't even say anything about yourself. You just ask them questions and let them talk about themselves and truly listen. At the end of the day everyone really just wants to feel seen. I love that advice and it's exactly what I utilized at that party because to be

honest, no one had a clue who I was and it was surprising once they started asking me that they actually knew about things I was doing but had no idea that I was the person behind it. Jen, we didn't get a chance to even touch the surface of your book. It's one of these books that I so encourage the audience to get because it's one, you're going to keep going back to again and again. And some of the things we didn't get to discuss today

were exercising the confidence muscle, how you get over things like FOMO, how you build that credibility and authority. I love how you talk about your stories about how you did over things like FOMO, how you build that credibility and authority. I love how you talk about your stories about how you did Instagram live, and it's something I need to do more of, how you embrace failures to craft your unique story, growing an audience of raving fans,

the power of giving value in so many more topics. If there was one thing that you wanted to leave the audience with from this episode or from your book, what would that take away be? We did touch a lot of things though. I know you just went on with a list of other things that we didn't talk about, which are a lot of things we should do with episode part two. But we did touch on so many things today and I loved this conversation with you. I would leave the audience with a few things. Number one, if you're listening to this podcast, you're in the right place. audience with a few things. Number one, if you're listening to this podcast, you're in the right place. This is definitely somebody that you want to learn from. I just got to meet you and connect with you. And I think that you're doing, you are basically practicing what you preach, which is so beautiful.

And I love that. I love being aligned with people that do the things that they're learning. And there's a lot of people on the internet that you can follow. And some people talk about stuff and don't actually do them. And you are actively doing all the things that you talk about. So if you're listening, I just want to tell you that actively doing all the things that you talk about. So if you're listening, I just want to tell you that you're in the right place and congratulate yourself. Or even just putting in your earbuds or playing this in your car and giving yourself a skiff of learning a little,

growing a little and listening to a conversation that could maybe inspire you to take action in a different way. And then the last thing that I'll leave you with is nothing happens. This is what I keep going back to again and again. You can think about things all day. So your podcast is called Passion Struck and you told me at the beginning that many people that are listening to this are feeling very stuff. And it is really easy to use this

excuse of I have to get completely clear on what my passion is, what my purpose is, and what the next step is before I can take action. And I did that for so long and it doesn't work. I will tell you right now that only from experience I can't tell you this from any other thing other than my own experience that the only way that you can get clear on what it is. by trying things and doing things and allowing yourself to be imperfect, allowing yourself to fail, allowing yourself to get rejected and taking action. And I promise you that the discomfort of doing something scared or doing something imperfectly or maybe getting rejected, it's uncomfortable, but it will pass. One of my favorite things to say to myself all the time is discomfort is temporary but growth is permanent. And the person that you become on the other side of that temporary discomfort, taking action before you're ready, starting before you're ready, doing the thing before you feel

prepared, doing the thing before you feel clear, you're going to get closer to what it is that you want, and you're going to prove to yourself that you can move through that temporary discomfort in order to become a bigger, more equipped, more evolved version of yourself. That's what I would do. Yeah, thank you so much for sharing that. And that advice rings true so much in my life as well. I remember every single position that I positioned myself for, did I have every skill set

all the knowledge on how to do it? No. But I knew I had the self-confidence that I could learn and I had a great foundation to step into it. So I think that's such important, is don't fear yourself out of life-changing opportunities, embrace the strengths that you have because they're gonna carry you forward. And Jen, I know you've got some big things coming up. Can you talk about those and maybe the best place where people can get to know more about you?

Yeah, I know you should come, John. It's going to be absolutely incredible. It's going to build your brand live. It's going to be in Atlanta. We didn't even announce the dates yet or the locations. And so hopefully by the time this comes out, we've already announced it. Because right now as we're speaking, nothing has been announced. But we just did this event not too long ago in October.

And it was absolutely epic. 600 people, lots of speakers. Gabby Bernstein was one of our keynote speakers. We had, it was incredible. Build your brand life is coming. And I'm not going to announce the date yet, but you can just follow me on Instagram. All the updates will be there.

I'd love for everyone to listen to this podcast to come. It is a motivational inspirational event that will help you build your brand. And we also talk a lot about using artificial intelligence to do that and really diving into AI and how to create better content and a bigger or scalable personal brand with AI. Follow me at Jen underscore got leave to learn more. All of the information is always on Instagram. I do a live every day. I go live on Instagram every single morning. I go live on every day.

Monday through Friday. It's not the same time every day. So just set your notifications on my profile and you can join me. We have a lot of fun every single morning getting ready to gather. And that takes a lot of guts because you do it without makeup, which I'm sure a lot of women, which is dread. So congratulations to you for doing that. Well, Jen, I knew this episode was going to be good, but you 10xed it. So thank you so much for being here, man.

It was my honor. And I'm so glad that Dr. Lion put you into our lives, our mutual lives. Thank you so much. Thank you so much for having me, John. This is great. I thoroughly enjoyed that interview with Jen Gottlieb. And I wanted to thank Jen and Dr. Gabrielle Lion for the honor and privilege of having her appear today on the show. Links to all things Jen will be in the show notes at passionstruck.com. Please use our website links if you purchase any of the books from the guests that we feature here on the show. Links to all things Jen will be in the show notes at passionstruck.com. Please use our website links if you purchase any of the books from the guests that we feature

here on the show. All proceeds go to supporting the show. Videos are on YouTube at both our main channel, John Armyles, and our Clips channel at PassionStruckClips. Please go check it out and subscribe. I also wanted to invite you to join the PassionStruck Challenge. Each week throughout 2024, we are going to be sending our community a new challenge that takes them closer to their aspirations of becoming passion struck. You can join this challenge by going to our website at passionstruck.com or slash challenge. You can also sign up for our weekly newsletter live intentionally where I give tips on personal development and mastery and you can

also sign up for our personal development newsletter, live intentionally, at passionstruck.com. You can find me on all the social platforms at John R. Miles. And lastly, you can sign up for our work-related newsletter work intentionally on LinkedIn. If you want to know how I am able to book amazing guests like John Gottlieb, it's because of my network. Go out there and build yours before you need it. You're about to hear a preview, the PassionStruck podcast interview that I did with Coach Matt Dory, who not only played on the University of North Carolina National Championship team with Michael Jordan and James Worthy, but also coached the Tarheals. But in 2003, Matt faced one of the biggest challenges in his

life. He was forced to resign from that dream job, and I discussed with them how he rebounded from that failure to rebuild himself and prepare for his next opportunity. I did not manage change properly. And that really was tough to shake. The only way to overcome that is massive success, which I had my first year. We were number one in the country. We beat Duke at Duke. We were tied for the ACC championship. And then my second year, we had the worst record in Carolina basketball history. So now the floodgates could open. It still bothers me. There's still

moments. There's always triggers. For me, North Carolina, the university, the basketball program, college basketball, those triggers, tough emotions. And at first, I try to be a tough guy and act like there's no big deal. It's just part of the business and things happen. And I was working with an executive coach at the time. And she said, no, no, you trusted this institution. These men when you were 17 years old. Now you feel

betrayed by a father figure. That made me realize that what I was feeling was real. It allowed me to deal with it a little bit better. Remember that we rise by lifting others so share this show with those that you love and care about. If you found today's episode with Jen Gottlieb on Being Seen Influential, then definitely share it with your friends and family members who could use the words that we gave here today. In the meantime, do your best to apply what you hear on the show so that you can live what you listen. Until next week, go out there and become Ash and Strong.