Passion Struck with John R. Miles - Jessica Zweig on How to Be the Light You Seek in the World | EP 544

Starting point is 00:00:00 Coming up next on Passion Strike. The synonym for the word light is information. That's it. Imagine yourself in a pitch black room and you switch on the light. You can see, you can see what is factually, actually, truthfully there. Our light that's within us is our truth and the truth of who we really are. I don't just believe I know that we as human beings are limitless, are innately loved, are innately worthy, are innately powerful and quantum and abundant. That's the information, the information of truth that lives inside of all of us. And darkness isn't evil.

Starting point is 00:00:44 We hear the word dark, we're like, ooh, that's something to be afraid of. That's bad. It's not. It's just lack of information. It's actually quite neutral. When you think about it, when we're in a dark room, we can't see. And when we can't see and we are in the dark, things do happen. We get scared. There is a vibration of fear in the dark. We are technically ignorant. And what happens in ignorance? Well, we make up stories. We project things that simply aren't true. And it is in the dark that things do get dangerous if we let the dark stay dark too long. Welcome to Passion Struck. Hi, I'm your host, John R. Miles. And on the show, we

Starting point is 00:01:22 decipher the secrets, tips, and guidance of the world's most inspiring people and turn their wisdom into practical advice for you and those around you. Our mission is to help you unlock the power of intentionality so that you can become the best version of yourself. If you're new to the show, I offer advice and answer listener questions on Fridays. We have long- form interviews the rest of the week with guests ranging from astronauts to authors, CEOs, creators, innovators, scientists, military leaders, visionaries, and athletes.

Starting point is 00:01:56 Now, let's go out there and become passion struck. Hey, passion struck fam. Welcome back to episode 544 of the Passion Struck Podcast. I am so grateful for your continued energy, passion, and commitment to living a more intentional life. Week after week, you show up ready to elevate yourselves and that's what makes this community so powerful. If you're joining for the first time, welcome to the Passion Struck family. You've just joined a global community focused on igniting purpose and living boldly with intention and we're thrilled to have you with us.

Starting point is 00:02:27 Before we dive in to today's episode, let's take a moment to reflect on some incredible conversations from last week. We started with Cody Sanchez, who shared her step-by-step framework for achieving financial freedom by investing in cash-flowing, sweaty and boring businesses. Her insights were a game changer for anyone looking to build wealth with intentionality. Then we had Kim Scott, author of Radical Candor and Radical Respect, who delivered actionable strategies for improving communication, building trust, and creating workplace cultures

Starting point is 00:02:56 where respect and candor thrive. Her tools for navigating difficult conversations resonated deeply and provided practical ways to lead with purpose and clarity. Both episodes are packed with powerful lessons and tie to my solo episode last week on how to bridge the gap between knowing and doing, and they're must-listen for anyone striving to take intentional action in their lives. And if you're ready to take these insights even deeper, don't forget to check out our episode starter packs with over 540 episodes. We know it can be overwhelming, so we've curated playlists on themes like leadership,

Starting point is 00:03:27 mental health, and personal growth. You can find them on Spotify or by visiting passionstruck.com slash starter packs. For weekly inspiration and actionable tips, be sure to sign up for my live intentionally newsletter at passionstruck.com. It's packed with exclusive content and tools to help you put the lessons from our episodes into practice. And you can also, while you're on the website, take the Passion Struck Quiz to find out where you stand on your journey to becoming passion struck.

Starting point is 00:03:52 And lastly, if you prefer watching these conversations, all our episodes are available on our YouTube channels where you can catch the videos and share them with others in your life who are passionate about growth. Today, I'm excited to bring you a conversation that promises to reshape how you view personal growth relationships and living with purpose. My guest is Jessica Zweig, bestselling author of The Light Work, whose transformative approach to inner and outer light has empowered countless individuals to unlock their infinite potential. Through her work, Jess guides us to navigate our inner shadows with self-responsibility

Starting point is 00:04:24 and harness the energy of our light, allowing us to heal, connect more deeply, and create a life of alignment and authenticity. In our discussion, Jess takes us through her unique framework for activating our inner light, providing actionable insights into navigating life's darkness with self-responsibility and empowerment. In part one of the interview, Jessica delves into our inner light, encouraging us to confront and heal from past traumas, break free from emotional constraints, and tap into our innate strength.

Starting point is 00:04:51 This segment will resonate with anyone on the journey of self-discovery, grappling with their inner challenges and looking for ways to heal and harness their full power. In part two of our conversation, Jessica brings us to the outer light, revealing how our relationships, from family dynamics to friendships to financial ties, shape our journey. She'll share with us how self-love can become the foundation for healthier connections and why understanding our worth is essential for creating a fulfilling life. This part is key for listeners who want to create deeper connections in their lives and understand the role they play in their own healing and growth. Finally, in part three of the conversation, Future Light, Jessica discusses our mission

Starting point is 00:05:27 as lightworkers, individuals who consciously live to spread light and purpose. Jessica's insights into living our soul's calling, reframing challenges, and finding abundance within are invaluable for those ready to step fully into their purpose. Whether you're seeking ways to transform your career, align with your calling calling or become a catalyst for change, Jessica's perspective will empower you. For the PassionStruck community, this conversation is a call to expand our consciousness, to find the courage to step out of our comfort zones

Starting point is 00:05:56 and to eliminate our lives in ways we may have never imagined. I'm so excited to dive into this transformative journey with Jessica Zwight. Thank you for choosing passion struck and choosing me to be your host and guide on your journey to creating an intentional life. Now, let that journey begin. Passion struck family, I am so excited to welcome Jessica's

Starting point is 00:06:21 wide to the passion struck podcast. Welcome, Jess, how are you today? Wonderful, john, I'm amazing. So happy to the Passion Strike podcast. Welcome, Jess. How are you today? Wonderful, John. I'm amazing. I'm so happy to be here with you. Thank you for having me. Well, Jess, I reached out to you because I'm a fan of your podcast, the Spiritual Hustler podcast.

Starting point is 00:06:37 And I thought I would start there because I find spiritual hustler is an interesting term. Where did you come up with that, and what does it mean to you? Oh, I love this question. I got to give Mike some credit to my publicist who is helping me with my book. About a year and a half ago, she looks at me, she's like, Jessica, you're a spiritual hustler.

Starting point is 00:06:57 And I was like, ding ding. That is accurate. That encapsulates me. And I'll explain more of why. But that term just really felt relevant. I think to a lot of women, I'm an entrepreneur, I'm ambitious. I've been serving a community of ambitious entrepreneurs for a long time. And I really want to celebrate our love of working and our ambition.

Starting point is 00:07:19 And yet at the same time, there's a sort of a toxic frame around that word that it can be negative. It's what burns us out. It's not always in alignment to how we're supposed to do this thing called build our dreams. And I've always been spiritual. My spiritual message is pretty out of the closet at this point. And I'm very unapologetically woo if you want to, I don't love that word, but I use that word just to make sense, conscious, awake people at this time. And with my show and really with my platform

Starting point is 00:07:47 and all the things that I'm doing today, my business, I'm really here to help women come home to their true nature and their feminine identities to really look at spirituality and business as intrinsically connected. The more we're in tune with our mission, our why, our true purpose in this life as a spiritual being having a human experience, I think the more

Starting point is 00:08:10 impactful we can be in our work. And I say this on my podcast, like we're really here on that show and in my work at large, to hustle from a different vibration, to hustle not from fear and scarcity and gripping and grinding, but to hustle for love and to hustle for humanity and to hustle from a place of trust and allowance. And when we spiritually hustle, I think we actually make a bigger impact. We make more money, but we don't kill ourselves on the way to do it. And I think that's what a lot of, excuse me. And I think that's what a lot of women are really craving and coming home to. So that's what a spiritual hustler means to me.

Starting point is 00:08:54 I love it. And what an amazing show you have created and I love how you interview your guests. So I highly encourage my audience to check you out. Thank you. Thank you so much. So I want to go into an area that I quite honestly have never talked about before on this show. And that is body dysmorphia. I grew up as a kid facing weight challenges my entire Facing weight challenges my entire adolescence until I got into high school. And I picked up cross country running and exchanged my whole life. But I remember throughout my entire childhood, having so low

Starting point is 00:09:34 esteem and being bullied and teased about my weight and just feeling like there was nothing I could do to, to make the situation better. I now look back and I realize it was the diet that I was exposed to growing up and. Carb overload and sugar and all those other things. But at the time when you're eight, nine, 10 years old, you don't even realize it. As I understand it, you yourself face these same issues and you had a defining event happen to you when you just got out of college, if I have it right, and you were an aspiring actress and you got this incredible audition and it blew up in your face, so to speak.

Starting point is 00:10:19 Can you talk about that? I'm like emotional just hearing you reflect that. I'm like emotional just hearing you reflect that it's amazing how raw we can remain when we think back on those pivotal moments. So I too grew up in, I was really little like angular until I got my period at 13 and then all of a sudden I had curves and I was plump and at 13 and then all of a sudden I had curves and I was plump and chubby and I grew up in a community where everyone was so thin and then I went to college and I gained not the freshman 15 but the freshman 30 and kept that weight on until I graduated and yet I went to school for theater. I was a well-trained actress by the time I graduated college, which was a very

Starting point is 00:11:05 competitive conservatory program. And so I entered the acting world, talented, but 30 pounds overweight. And I got this incredibly coveted meeting with one of the biggest commercial directors in the city of Chicago. And it was a preliminary audition for a huge campaign. And I walked into his office. I was 22. I was probably about six months out of college. And I walk into his office. I sit down in his chair about to begin the conversation. I hadn't even told him my name.

Starting point is 00:11:41 I hadn't even formally introduced myself. I hadn't said a word and he. I hadn't even formally introduced myself. I hadn't said a word. And he goes, stand back up. Turn around. Looks me up and down. And he asks me while I'm standing there, how much do you weigh? And I didn't know. I wasn't weighing myself on a regular basis.

Starting point is 00:12:00 I said, I don't know my weight. He said, well, do you know what size you are? I said, I'm probably a size eight, maybe a size six. And he just looked at me matter of fact, straight as possible. He said, well, if you ever want to be an actress, you're going to need to lose about 35 pounds. And if you don't do that, you least need to get your size down to a two and a zero. If you want to ever be on camera. You can sit down now tell me your name. That was not only the beginning and I say this in the book of my acting career but that was really the beginning of my adult life in the world as a woman. And that one conversation set me on a 10 year spiral of disordered eating, overworking

Starting point is 00:12:52 out, orthorexia at times anorexia at times bulimia, obsession with diet culture. This was at the dawn of the Atkins no carb movement, Weight Watchers, Master Cleanse, Mediterranean diet, raw vegan. I literally only read those books for 10 years and they would sit on my shelf and I would obsess every second of every single day for most of my 20s about my weight. And I actually got myself down to a size zero. I was so thin during a chapter in my 20s that I didn't get my period for two years, for two whole years. I didn't have a cycle because I was so underweight and malnourished and overworking out. I would track everything that I ate in a diary. I'd work out for two hours a day. What was really, I think, more prolific was my feelings around my own confidence. No matter how

Starting point is 00:13:52 thin I got, I never felt thin enough. I wouldn't leave my house at certain days because I didn't, I felt so fat in my own jeans. I didn't want to leave my own house. I would cancel plans, events, business meetings, date nights. I would stare at myself in the mirror and cry. I was really alone in that experience for a large part of my twenties. And I was really becoming an entrepreneur that allowed me to focus my energy elsewhere. Being an actress is a very beautiful journey and I credit those that do it for the rest of their lives. It's an art and an artistry and a very noble career.

Starting point is 00:14:34 But if I'm gonna be honest, at least how it was for me, it was extremely narcissistic and it perpetuates insecurity. Like I have, as I got thinner, I had a, I guess a pretty enough face to go out on castings for commercial gigs and photo shoots. And I would be like the five foot four girl with a curvy body, pretty face standing next to legitimate models who were like 5'11 and way thin. And I was comparing myself every single day against these women. And it just created an obsession that I didn't break out of until I left

Starting point is 00:15:09 the industry and became an entrepreneur. And then in my 30s, I contracted an autoimmune disorder. And I talk about that in the book. I say my 20s was body dysmorphia and my 30s was autoimmune. And it was really my spiritual journey that led me to truly understand how to honor my body as a sacred temple and that has nothing to do with my gene size and everything to do with the magnificence of this human machine that we all get to walk through life within, which is an

Starting point is 00:15:39 amazing technology. I mean, our body does trillions of functions for us every second of the day without it asking us to. It is the home of our souls. And so now flash forward to my 40s, I have a much better relationship with my body. But there are days, of course, where I still look in the mirror and criticize it. I think I'll always be healing from that trauma because that's really what it was. And I know you can relate, John, you talked about eight, nine years old, and you mentioned that your fiance struggles. I mean, it is a perpetual epidemic in our conscious collective mind to not love our

Starting point is 00:16:15 bodies unconditionally. We are often very abusive and critical and mean and neglecting our bodies. And I hope my book and my story, especially the chapter in my book about body is a invitation back to really what our bodies are and they are sacred. They are way more than a gene size. They're more than flesh and bone. They're quantum. Well, Josh, thank you for going through that in so much detail and being vulnerable about it. If there's a listener who's tuning in and they themselves are going

Starting point is 00:16:52 through this right now, what would be your advice to them? Well, it's first to recognize that all of the beliefs that you have around your body, the negative beliefs, they're not yours. They're programs and projections based upon a society specifically for women that has curated a made-up, totally false story and ideal of what our bodies need to look like. So to really just tap out is the best you can objectively to look at those thoughts as just not yours. And that's step one. I think step two is this sounds very tactical and trivial, but it's really

Starting point is 00:17:43 powerful in fact, to stop following certain accounts on social media that trigger you, stop watching certain shows, stop picking up certain magazines, like unhooking yourself from the projection field is really powerful. To come home to your body, what you look like in your own vessel, in your own container of awareness is huge. I think as someone that went down the rabbit hole of all the diets and all the different workouts, like start building a relationship with your own body of what feels good to you, how to intuitively nourish your body, how to intuitively move your body. I say this in my book, I have a whole

Starting point is 00:18:22 exercise actually at the back of that chapter where I teach the reader how to have a conversation with your body, like how to ask it questions, and how to learn how to listen to the answers, and to cultivate a right relationship with your own body. And that typically requires us to slow down, get still, move at the pace of our own rhythm versus the toxic tech that is constantly bombarding us with go do be in action mode constantly to really slow down. Another hot tip that I love and live by if you are a woman is to get a app on your phone that tracks your menstrual cycle and learn about the different phases of that 30-day window and how our body wants us to fuel it and move it and how much rest we need, how much energy we have in these four different phases of the infradian rhythm, which is connected to the moon

Starting point is 00:19:20 cycle, and to really become in tune with that feminine nature, I think is one of the biggest unlocks and permission slips to start to love and honor our bodies at a completely different level. And so that would be my advice and to just tell her she's perfect. She's beautiful. She is divinely designed and the fact that she doesn't look like anyone else is the greatest miracle and her biggest superpower. Well, thank you for sharing that. And I'm sure there's someone who's listened to this

Starting point is 00:19:52 who needed to hear those exact words. So. Thank you for asking. You have mentioned your book a couple of times today and it's titled is The Light Work. It's a USA Today best-selling book. Congratulations on that and for those who are watching, the cover is right behind your right hand shoulder. Yes it is. Congratulations on that and I wanted to go here in The Light Work. You

Starting point is 00:20:20 talk about uncovering our inner light and the importance of recognizing both light and dark aspects of ourselves Can you share how you define inner light and how it differs from the darkness? Of course so the synonym for the word light as I define it throughout my own spiritual studies and research and experience and How I phrase it in the book, the synonym for the word light is information. That's it. So when we are in a dark room, imagine yourself in a pitch black room and you switch on the light, you can see, you can see

Starting point is 00:20:59 what is factually, actually, truthfully there. And so our light that's within us is our truth and the truth of who we really are. And I believe and I don't just believe I know that we as human beings are limitless, are innately loved, are innately worthy, are innately powerful and quantum and abundant. That's the information, the truth, the information of truth that lives inside of all of us. And darkness isn't evil. When we hear the word dark, we're like, oh, that's something to be afraid of, that's bad.

Starting point is 00:21:39 It's not, it's just lack of information. It's actually quite neutral when you think about it. When we're in a dark room, we can't see. And when we can't see and we are in the dark, things do happen. We get scared. There is a vibration of fear in the dark. We are technically ignorant, right? And what happens in ignorance?

Starting point is 00:21:59 Well, we make up stories, we project things that simply aren't true. And it is in the dark that things do get dangerous if we let the dark stay dark too long. I write about this in my book, some of the most horrific manifestations of the darkness is hatred and bullying and racism and anti-Semitism and homophobia. And I mean, those are some of the darkest expressions of humanity, right? And that's coming from our lack of information, truth that we're all love, that we're all connected, that we're all part of one big human family, that we are powerful, right? But those are the most extreme atrocities, right?

Starting point is 00:22:40 Things I just mentioned, the average person festers in their own dark and things like imposter syndrome come up, scarcity comes up, jealousy comes up, lack of worthiness comes up, competition and comparison, survival, all of these human manifestations of the dark are things I think we're all very familiar with. And just to take it a layer deeper, I really believe that's why we're here. It's why we've come here in these human experiences to navigate through that polarity of light and dark, because that's where we find our truth.

Starting point is 00:23:15 We find our power when we're willing to go into the dark, meet it, face it, take responsibility for it, be willing to change and grow, to accept responsibility for our own projection and co-creation in the dark, which is the hardest part of personal growth, frankly, in my view, is taking that responsibility for our own side of the street. But when we do that, John, when we accept the assignment, we go into the dark, we don't avoid it, bypass it, pretend it's not there, ignore it, shame it.

Starting point is 00:23:49 When we stop doing that and we turn around and we go in and we say out loud, I hate my body. When we say out loud, I am terrified, I'm gonna not pay my bills this month. When we go in and we say, yeah, I was a really bad wife yesterday. We can find a whole new level of our authenticity. And we can't and freedom, because when we start to acknowledge the dark that's within us because that's why the book starts with inner light. It has to start within. It's so much easier to go call out the dark and tell everyone else what they need to fix and change

Starting point is 00:24:27 and how they should grow and heal versus ourselves. We become free. No one can call us out on our own-ish because we already know it. No one can call us out on something we don't already know about ourselves. That's power. That's empowerment.

Starting point is 00:24:44 And so the dance between the light and the dark is the whole point of what we've come here as human beings to evolve our souls through this timeline called your own unique life. And I write very intentionally in the book. I go into, welcome to the light work. I make the joke I could have called the book the dark work because I talk so much about my own painful experiences throughout various areas of my life. But I have a chapter right before the whole book starts that says, but first a word about the dark because our darkness is our gift. Our darkness is our teacher. Our darkness is our way show her back into the light. And you can't fully live shower back into the light and you can't fully live in your

Starting point is 00:25:31 embodied state of joy of bliss, of abundance of freedom of connection, unless you've met yourself in the darkest of the dark moments of your own human experience. And so that's really what the book is an invitation into is the darkness because it's there we truly find our brightest light. So you're not going to believe this. I'm not sure if you've ever read this book, the book of awakening by Mark Neppo. But I try to keep up with this every single night because he does it by date. So every date has a chapter. And last night I was reading this as I was prepping for the interview and reading your book and November 13, he writes being true to who we are means carrying our spirit like a candle in

Starting point is 00:26:21 the center of our darkness. And I read it. And it was as if chills were going down. I have chills right now going down my whole body. Because it resonated so much with your message. Wow. It's funny, John, as you were even picking up the book, I started getting chills. I'm like, something really powerful is about to come through. And then you read that and my body kept waving with chills. That's so profound, so timely. Wow. Well, when you think about this candle that you and Mark are talking about, this concept of light isn't new.

Starting point is 00:26:59 And I thought it was so funny how when you were talking to your publisher about using this word, that they saw it as misunderstood or problematic. And we're trying to steer you away from using it on the cover of my book, I have a light to it's a flame. And I think it is such a powerful symbol. And my publisher didn't want to use it. Either In fact, it was almost a walk away moment for both of us because I was so adamant about having it on the cover. When you think about our own light, which is really, as you describe it, our potential,

Starting point is 00:27:41 it can feel so intimidating to us and even others. How do you think embracing this idea of being the light helps us reconnect with our authentic power? Gosh, this is such a beautiful question. That's such a big one. When I say this in my book, because I do tell that story about how, and I did walk away from that publisher

Starting point is 00:28:01 and I decided to go with a different publisher because they were, the other publisher was fighting me on my title. And they called the word light problematic. And I couldn't wrap my brain around that. I was like, how can something so universal and available to all of us and the truth of who we are be a problem? And then it clicked. And I wrote this in the book.

Starting point is 00:28:24 I'm like, people aren't afraid of the light that you are. People are afraid of the light that is within them, that is often unexpressed and repressed. And so you live in your light and being so embodied in your truth and your joy and your authenticity has to be wrong. Like they have to put a label that's bad as a way to protect themselves from shining that brightly too. And this is typically subconscious, unconscious, right? So to answer your question, it's such a beautiful question. I think it's really, I say this all throughout the book and I believe this to be true. I mean, there is power in numbers and when you step out and start to shine your light, quantum science, this isn't woo woo,

Starting point is 00:29:05 like light attracts light, science like attracts like. And when you are embodied in a vibration, because everything is energy, right? This is Albert Einstein, this is Joe Dispenza, this is science. We are doing one of two things. We're attracting that same like energy to us and we are repelling any unlike energy away from us. And I think it's a very understandable and I hold a lot of compassion for people

Starting point is 00:29:34 who are afraid to shine their light, to be themselves, to stand in their truth, to share their message because they're afraid they're gonna be rejected. And this is not only rejected, but abandoned, die. This is really woven into our psyche and our DNA, our ancestral lineage, because there was a time specifically for women where if we shine too bright, and we took up too much space, and we spoke our truth, we would be burned. Like, hundreds and hundreds of years,

Starting point is 00:30:05 millions of women were cast as witches and tortured because we were tuned to nature. And we had a magical understanding of the planet and our beautiful sexuality to create life. I mean, that became dangerous, right? It was called wicked. And so this is so deep, this question. It weaves its way back into

Starting point is 00:30:25 our psyche on a subcutaneous level. And so today here we are in 2024, technically safe, right? I mean, we might get some people hating on us on social media, maybe we'll lose our jobs, maybe we'll, someone will break up with us if we, I mean, these are, I want to acknowledge there are extremes in today's society and how it's evolved and what's relevant today. But at the end of the day, there is a greater cost to you not living your life, not living your truth, than there is to fully express it. It's like that Anayas Nin quote that I love so much, it says, and the day came, I'm going to botch it a little bit,

Starting point is 00:31:05 but she's somewhat, this is paraphrasing it. And the day came when the risk it was to stay tightly wound up in a bud was greater than the risk it was to bloom. And when we bloom, back to that power in numbers comment, we do start to attract like quantum science people who are of that same energy and frequency. And it creates a sense of affirmation and confirmation and safety once more that we can be the light. And yeah, people are going to repel those aren't your people that partner

Starting point is 00:31:47 probably wasn't meant to be your partner that job wasn't probably the right fit those social media followers were never going to buy your stuff or listen to your podcast anyway so to really trust that your light is needed and that you are safe to shine in and that there might be some is needed and that you are safe to shine it and that there might be some losses along the way. But what that is the universe just reorienting and reorganizing what's meant for you. And to really trust that and it's easier to trust that when we're surrounded by the people who see it and feel it too. But you can't find those people unless you step out and shine the light in the first place. I love that Jess.

Starting point is 00:32:25 And one of the things I have talked about repeatedly on this show, because I think it's so important is when I was given this mission years ago to create what I'm doing now, I was told to go out there and help the beaten board, broken, battered, lonely, helpless of the world. And I had no idea what that meant from the business executive position and chair that I was sitting in at the time. I didn't know who those people were, how I was supposed to help them. And as I started to think about personal branding, and I was working with Rory Vaden, who I'm sure and I was doing this one word problem exercise

Starting point is 00:33:06 that he has people go to, which I found to be extremely difficult. Took me almost a year to get to it. I realized that those things are symptoms and underneath all of that, the thing that is impacting people is unmattering. And there's a quote that I was thinking about when you were talking by Andy Stanley,

Starting point is 00:33:28 when you were talking about light and not realizing our light, he says, our fear of not mattering much has the potential to draw us away from what matters most. And I think it so fits in to us running running away from the light because when we do, I think it puts us into a place where we feel like we don't matter. And then all these other things start brewing inside of us and we don't feel whole. I wanted to get your thought on that.

Starting point is 00:33:59 Oh, John, you just basically told the story of the first 38 years of my life. I mean, I feel like you named it. I mean, it's the core human yearning is to belong. We really are meant to live in community. It's how we were designed from the dawn of civilization before the modern world. We lived in tribes and to belong is to matter and to matter is to belong. And a lot of our collective trauma is unfortunately, and I say this with all the love in the world based upon, I think, our parents and their parents and their parents that had this deeply seated program to survive and to clench and to grip and to not trust life and not to trust

Starting point is 00:34:57 themselves and their own power and to put themselves out into the light. That was not an option because we came up through centuries of survival really and the fittest always won. And I look back at my own childhood and my parents are incredible people. I'm obsessed with my family but they were imperfect at the same time and doing the best they could with what they knew. And my dad was really hard on me. And in order to matter, I had to succeed, right? Because in his mind, if you are successful, you're safe, right? And he was just trying to keep me protected in the way that he raised me. And that caused a lot of strife between us because I was a young rebel that came out of the womb like ready to do life on my terms and we butted heads for a lot of my life. And I found myself in my late 30s at the peak of my success, quote unquote, mattering, right? All of a sudden, I was the successful entrepreneur, built a business, written a book, had a podcast,

Starting point is 00:36:05 had a community, won the awards, hit the press hits, check. Why inside did I not feel like I mattered? That was what I had to reconcile. Like I said, I made the joke. You basically described my first 38 years of my life to remember. The key word is remembering that I didn't have to do any of those things to matter. And that is the collective amnesia that we have in the collective consciousness that I think a lot of people are awakening to, that we are born worthy, we are born loved, we are born perfect,

Starting point is 00:36:40 going back to the body dysmorphia part of our conversation. And that is unfortunately, and also fortunately, because it's part of the gift of the human experience is a lifelong journey of unlearning. And I just feel that there is such an opportunity given podcasts like yours and mine and books and coaching and therapy and everything that sort of become mainstream that our parents certainly didn't have for us to heal that and to come home to our innate mattering. And so I think that's really at the end of the day what we're all doing here, John, like in the space, right, like we all do it in a different way we have different gifts we have a different, but I feel like it's one same end goal

Starting point is 00:37:26 to help people remember how much they matter. I love that. And thank you for answering that so intentionally. I want to take you now, Jess, to the airport. And you're about ready to board a plane. And I have been where you were. You are well known for being the founder and CEO of simply be agency. When I came out of doing my fortune 50 roles, I started a company where I was doing fractional leadership roles before they were in the mainstream like today, and I built this thing up to eight figure plus in revenue. And I was completely and utterly burned out, bored. The last thing I wanted to do was to step into another company.

Starting point is 00:38:21 And I finally came to this realization that I was spending so much time making other people's dreams come true and making them money. I wasn't focusing on what I had been called to do and I needed a new identity, but I didn't know how to find it. And so I used this kind of to introduce, you've at this point had reached a profound burnout.

Starting point is 00:38:48 You were feeling hollow from the inside out, which I completely can relate to because I felt so numb at one point in my life. It's not something I would wish on anyone. Can you talk about that pivotal moment boarding that plane to Cairo and how step stepping away from the hustle helped you reconnect with purpose and light? Thank you for sharing that. I feel that in my body as you share it. I had started this one woman consultancy called simply be agency inspired by this little tattoo on my wrist. I had no money.

Starting point is 00:39:19 I had no strategy. I didn't even have a website. I was just like, I'm going to help people with their personal brands, call it an agency that sounds cute, but it's just me and I'm just consulting. And it just took off. Within 18 months, I had made a million dollars. And then a few years later, I made multi-millions. And then I wrote my number one bestselling book, my first book, B, and that exploded

Starting point is 00:39:38 in my business and doubled my revenue, doubled my team in less than 11 months. So here I was on this rocket ship, right? Mountain, mountain ascent, like just bolting, sprinting, 100 hour work weeks, literally on airplanes, being the podcast host, being the speaker, being the lead generator, being the team manager, being the firefighter, whenever there were problems, which was all the time when you scale that quickly, everything breaks people process systems. So 2022 is the year that like I said, I was at the peak of my career crushing life quote

Starting point is 00:40:12 unquote and inside I wanted to die. I mean, I was, that's not an exaggeration. I was diagnosed with depression and couldn't leave my house for months at a time. I didn't have the energy to shower, socialize. And the world on Instagram thought I was like the bright yellow sunny branding girl that was always so positive and high vibes and killing it. And so that was a real reckoning, right?

Starting point is 00:40:36 Like I was so out of alignment. I wanted to close my whole business down at a certain point. And I was in that state of mind when I got on that plane to Egypt. And I remember feeling like a bag of bones. I remember getting on that airplane. It's a long flight. We had a connection through Germany.

Starting point is 00:40:56 We were going from Germany to Cairo and we're coming down into the city on the airplane when you can start to see all the city lights of Cairo, it looks like one big grid. And I just remember feeling nothing. I remember feeling so empty, like black. I just, I was like, I have nothing to give to this trip. In fact, we land, we get to the baggage claim. It's me and my best friend, we went together

Starting point is 00:41:27 and we were getting picked up by our driver. And there was another woman who was on this trip with us. It was like a 17 person spiritual retreat pilgrimage for these two weeks. And this girl was flying in from LA and she was meeting the driver too. So he was picking up all three of us. And I remember her and her name is Vanessa

Starting point is 00:41:44 and she was at baggage claim and we were like, oh, you're coming on this trip too. So he was picking up all three of us. I remember her and her name is Vanessa and she was at baggage claim and we were like, Oh, you're coming on this trip too. And she started talking to me and I looked at her and I said it as kindly as I said it to her. And I said, I just, I need you to know, this is not personal, but I am so burnt out and tired and exhausted. And I just don't really have the energy to talk to anybody right now. She became one of my closest friends, by the way, She's one of my girls. And we told, we remember that moment very thoroughly together, but that I was just like, I got nothing. And I remember we show up at the hotel and we get our itinerary and I'm looking and I'm like seeing that there's four, five AM, sometimes three AM wake up calls throughout this trip, because we're going to these temples

Starting point is 00:42:25 really early before they open to the public. That was part of the magic of this trip actually was we got all this private access, but we had to get up at dawn to do it. And I remember having a mini nervous breakdown because I was so tired. I think when we're really, truly burnt out, we resort to that two-year-old child that needs a nap, that is so hungry and so exhausted that I see, you ever see a child have a tantrum at a restaurant? I look at that today, I'm like, I understand how that feels. You just want to lose your mind because you're so tired.

Starting point is 00:43:00 And that's where I was on that plane when I started that trip. And because I had nothing left to give, I only was it's the inspiration and through line for the entire book and impetus for this whole new platform and business and message and podcast that I have now created. It was from Egypt that I like to say that version of me, thank God, but I also bless her. She died. She did not come home with me. I came home a

Starting point is 00:43:46 different person. That trip was a full-on identity death that happened in a crescendo of temple visit after temple visit where I recollected and reclaimed and re-membered, re-membered myself. And I couldn't be more grateful for the dark because it really was what brought me home to the light. And thank you for asking this question. I have never really recounted it that way, but thank you, forgive me now. Well, it's an important aspect

Starting point is 00:44:21 and I can't do your book justice, but it's your experiences that happened in Egypt, which you had some profound moments in the temples that you visited that your soul family came to you and told you needed to spread this mission that you're doing now. So it's a real compelling part. And you and I have just talked about part one of your book which you call inner light Yeah, the next part is called outer light and then the third part is called future light And I wanted to use this to introduce outer light you you start off this section with a quote

Starting point is 00:44:56 That goes when you step into the thing you are the world does not burn But glows more brightly with the light you bring, which is so true to everything that we've been discussing here today. But you then go on here and you talk about the kind of our soul family. And can you explain the importance of the soul family and maybe relate it to that quote? I'm getting emotional like tears in my eyes as you read that quote back, because that's a Brian Andreas quote, who's an artist I love and I commissioned a piece of art from him and and he wrote that it's in my bathroom that art and it's so profound. Like when you step into the thing you are, the world does not burn. We think it might.

Starting point is 00:45:45 But in fact, glows more brightly with the light that you bring. Yeah, I'm just gonna jump in because it's exactly when people ask me about passion struck and what it means to become passion struck, it's really the same thing. When you step into who you're supposed to be, your life just explodes in positivity and in spiritual awakening,

Starting point is 00:46:07 so to speak. And limitless potential. Absolutely. And so much, you can't even see it. It's so good, but the world is waiting for you to step into the thing that you are so that you can see it too. And thank you for really outlining the book because in the first section, it's inner light. It's like loving our bodies, finding our personal power, getting in touch with our

Starting point is 00:46:27 emotions, really remembering that we are fully responsible for our own choices in life. And then we can cultivate all that inner light. And then we go to Thanksgiving dinner with our families. Then we get into a fight with our partner, or then the client doesn't want to pay us, or our friend is talking gossip about it, right? We get triggered in the outer realm beyond our own inner world. And so I start that section with family, soul family. And we've probably, maybe some of your listeners have or have not heard the term soul family. And we've probably maybe some of your listeners have or have not heard

Starting point is 00:47:06 the term soul family. I certainly have. And it's usually credited to the family that you choose, like your circle of friends, your community, your neighbors, your tribe that we choose in our conscious lives. That's what soul family has in certain circles been defined as. I don't think that's true. I think our soul family is literally the people that our souls at a cosmic level came into this life and chose. We didn't choose it in our own conscious 3D identities. Our souls did. And we typically therefore, not typically, always choose the perfect parents, the perfect siblings, the perfect aunts and uncles for us. And that word perfect I know is loaded because no one had a perfect

Starting point is 00:47:59 family and that's because no person is perfect. And yet, they were designed, our souls designed these nuclear soul families for our highest evolution, for our highest growth and potential. And when we look at it through that lens,, I'm offering the reader a more conscious. Healed or at least on the path to healing what that was, no matter how dysfunctional and perfect and traumatic it was. That we can see that we became who we became because of it. We weren't defined by our parents. We were refined by our parents. We were refined by our parents. We were refined like a diamond. And I make that metaphor in the chapter that a diamond, to become a diamond has to go through 2000 degrees Fahrenheit of heat and like over a billion pounds of

Starting point is 00:49:00 pressure to become a diamond. And we had tons of heat and pressure, proverbially speaking, in our family systems. No, again, nobody has a perfect family because our parents were not perfect people. And I like to say my parents were doing the best with what they had, with what they knew. And there was trauma in my upbringing. And there was trauma in my upbringing. And when we do this work, that the subline of that chapter is soul family. Healing yourself heals the world. We look around the planet. We turn on the news.

Starting point is 00:49:37 There is war. There is divisiveness. There is sickness. There is poverty. There is polarity everywhere. And we can't go out as good intentioned as we are and fix any of that. Because I know we all want to make a better world without starting right here. Because all of that is being played out by people who are unhealed because of their own

Starting point is 00:49:59 trauma. And so if we want to heal the world, we have to start by healing ourselves. And I think that our deepest pain on the source of our unhealed nature started with our family systems. And so that's where I began that section with Outer Light as that first invitation to find with Outer Light is that first invitation to find that light within that dark. And that is a very heavy chapter, but I think it's also a really hopeful chapter. I cried writing that entire chapter and I got to shout out my father in particular and my mom for giving me the grace to write about our family the way that I did. And it was that was that in and of itself was its own journey.

Starting point is 00:50:48 Thank you so much for sharing that. And we don't have time to go through much more of this chapter, but I'll tell people if they wanna read the book, you talk about self-love as a foundation, you go into romantic relationships, you go into our relationship with money and our career and healing our connection with others and the importance of female friendships, et cetera.

Starting point is 00:51:12 So those are all things that people can deep dive by buying your book. I want to fast forward to future light because this had so many parallels to my own book, Passion Struck, because in it, I take people through these five different plateaus on their journey to becoming passion struck. And at the end of it, what I'm really trying to get people to do is to consciously engage in their lives. I think we are facing an epidemic of the disease of disconnection. And the thing we're most disconnected with is ourselves. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:51:48 And it's impossible for us to be light workers. If we don't know who we are and we don't have that strong relationship with who we are, because to me, to understand how to do the future light, you've got to identify and define your personal mission and purpose. One of the things that I thought was intriguing in this is combining creation, calling, and cause. You describe how each of us has a unique blend

Starting point is 00:52:16 of those three things, creation, calling, and cause. Could you share with our listeners and viewers how they can explore and align these elements? Absolutely. You really read my book, John. I love you. Thank you for all these questions. It's always such a gift when I get to be on a podcast with someone who's really truly read it. It's amazing. So before I get into the creation, calling, cause triangle, I'll be brief and explain where that was inspired by back to Egypt. We got to go to the temple of Karnak, massive structure, very significant place in Luxor. And our guides tell us the approach of the temple like this is the temple of purpose.

Starting point is 00:52:56 You're going to go into Karnak and people walk out knowing their purpose. I'm sitting there on the bus about to pop off like a totally smug a-hole being like, I already know my purpose. I'm not going to find anything new here. Look at my life. Look at my agency. Look at my book. Look at my podcast.

Starting point is 00:53:12 I'm on purpose. I'm changing lives. I'm not going to find anything new here. And I nonetheless go through the temple, walk into one of the structures, get a little bit of energetic shift. Something happened to me in one of the structures, get a little bit of energetic shift. Something happened to be in one of those buildings. I walk out, the second I'm walking out, this tiny little white feather floats in front of my face.

Starting point is 00:53:32 Feathers are my totem. I have feathers everywhere. They're like my sign from the universe always. And this tiny little white feather floats in front of my face. I lean out my palm, it lands in my palm, and I heard the universe chuckle, like, hardcore, actually laugh at me. And I got the message, like, your purpose isn't at all what you thought it was.

Starting point is 00:53:53 Your purpose is to learn how to live as light as a feather and to teach other women that you can be powerful and free at the same time. That's what you are actually here to do. That's your mission. And so that really inspired that chapter in the book, which is one of my actually favorite chapters of them all, where I really go deep on like the cosmic reason we are all really here and it is bigger than what we do. It's bigger than how we make money. It's bigger than like our impact on social media. It might even be bigger than your own unique family system. Like we're here to play a much bigger game than we've given ourselves credit for

Starting point is 00:54:30 and how powerful our own unique lives need to really be. And that inspired what's called the Lightworkers Anatomy, the mission of a Lightworkers Anatomy, I should say, that is a triangle that is comprised of your creation, which is for most of us, typically what we do for a living, the thing that only we could create because there is only one us. Then there's our calling,

Starting point is 00:54:50 which is what our soul came here to do. It's the thing we would do every single day of our lives, whether or not we got paid for it. And for some people, our creation and our calling is connected, and that's a gorgeous thing. But in the book, I really offer a permission slip. If that's not that's connected,

Starting point is 00:55:04 your calling might be golf and where you find the most joy, thing, but in the book, I really offer a permission slip. If that's not that's connected, your calling might be golf and where you find the most joy, but your creation is your one-of-a-kind finance career or your creation and your calling could be intertwined and you're an entrepreneur and that's beautiful. And then the final piece is your cause, which is really, what are you leaving behind? Why is this world better? Because you existed. Because we're all going to die. And one day they're going to talk about us. And is it the fact that you made a lot of money and helped a lot of clients? Is it that you are a really good golfer? Is it because raised a really great family? Maybe that's it. But like to look more broadly at the world and to not play small and to

Starting point is 00:55:48 take your responsibility in making this world better seriously and to expand the aperture of your true mission is what that chapter and that experience really is all about and why I left it in the future because we're really creating a future earth today based on how we show up. What you refer to as Gaia. That's right. So I'm gonna close out our interview

Starting point is 00:56:19 with this quote from your book, which I thought is a great way to bring everything together, especially since you just talked about the planet. You write, the way you help to restore the planet is by restoring yourself first. The way you heal the planet is by healing yourself first. And the way you activate this planet into more light is by activating yourself first. Such a profound quote, Jess. Thank you so much for joining us today. Where's the best place that people can go

Starting point is 00:56:51 to learn more about you? Thank you so much for having me. This was such a treat. I was looking forward to this so much, John. So thank you for over exceeding my expectations of this conversation with you're incredible. You can come find me on my website, jessicasweig.com. I teach a certification coaching program, group coaching certification program on feminine leadership. It's called the Feminine Frequency Business School. I'm launching that

Starting point is 00:57:15 next year, early next year. Come find me on Instagram at jessicasweig. You can buy the book anywhere books are sold, Amazon, Target, Barnes and Noble, all the places. And come find me in my podcast, The Spiritual Hustler, where John dipped into. And I would love to meet anyone from your community. Come say hi. I'm very accessible. Well, thank you. And one last person I had to mention was Amy Lee McCreary, who said you have to get Jess on your show. So I. Oh, amazing. Well, thank you so much.

Starting point is 00:57:46 Thank you, Amy. Thank you, John. This was a gift to be with you. You're a beautiful soul. I'm so in awe of what you've built and it's an honor to be here today. Oh, the honor was mine. Thank you so much.

Starting point is 00:57:58 What an illuminating and heartfelt conversation with Jessica Zweig. From embracing both light and shadow to navigating personal growth and self-responsibility and empowerment, today's interview has been a master class in stepping into our authentic purpose and power. Jess's framework for reclaiming our light

Starting point is 00:58:15 is a powerful reminder that we are not just connected to the light, we are the light. By remembering who we truly are, we can heal, create deeper connections, and live a life of alignment and fulfillment. As we wrap up, I encourage you to reflect on how you can bring more light into your own life. Whether it's confronting a personal shadow, cultivating self-love, or stepping into your unique mission, Jess's insights offer practical ways to take that next step towards transformation.

Starting point is 00:58:42 If Jess's message resonated with you, please leave us a 5-star rating and review. Your feedback helps us continue to bring these impactful conversations to the PassionStruck community. And if you know someone who could benefit from Jess's wisdom, share this episode with them. A single conversation can spark profound change. You can find links to everything discussed today, including Jess's book, The Lightwork, in the show notes at passionstruck.com.

Starting point is 00:59:03 The video version is also available on YouTube and don't forget to check out our sponsors and deals at passionstruck.com slash deals. Supporting those who support the show keeps us bringing these invaluable conversations to you. Before we close, I want to remind you that I'm passionate about sharing these insights with organizations and teams through speaking engagements. If today's episode resonated with you and you think my message could inspire your team or company, head over to johnrmiles.com slash speaking to learn more.

Starting point is 00:59:27 Let's work together to create intentional change and ignite growth. Next episode, I am so excited to bring you a fascinating conversation with George Aplen, a business transformation expert and innovator. George will share actionable strategies for navigating career shifts, embracing change, and staying aligned with your purpose

Starting point is 00:59:44 through every stage of life. You don't wanna miss it. People typically have a lot more agency than they think they do, right? You can make decisions every day that make your life better. And I was in my talk with, if you take 1.0, 1.0, think of that as a step, and you raise that to the 365th power, that equals one. But if you take 1.01, so imagine that is 1% better, and you raise that to the 365th power, that's 37. This is night and day. I always tell people, when in doubt, act. Make a decision today that will make your life better. And if that's going from zero push-ups to one, that's a step. If that's going from walking 2,000 steps to 3,000 steps, take it, right? Take the step every day to make your life a little bit better and own that choice. You have the power to do that.

Starting point is 01:00:29 Don't make excuses. Take the damn step. Until then, remember the fee for the show is simple. If you found value in today's episode, share it with someone who could benefit. And as always, apply what you hear so that you can live what you listen. Until next time, live life passion-spirited.

Passion Struck with John R. Miles - Jessica Zweig on How to Be the Light You Seek in the World | EP 544

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