Passion Struck with John R. Miles - Kris Carr on How To Find Strength To Face Life’s Challenges EP 309

Episode Date: June 22, 2023

Joining me today is Kris Carr, a renowned speaker, wellness activist, and bestselling author, whose life took an unforeseen turn when she faced a rare stage four cancer diagnosis at the age of 31. But it was the unexpected twist of her adoptive father's battle with pancreatic cancer that ignited a profound journey of emotional growth and transformation. Kris's upcoming book, "I'm Not a Mourning Person," releasing on September 19, 2023, beautifully captures her experiences. Her remarkable story serves as a poignant reminder that unexpected twists can pave the way for remarkable opportunities for growth and healing. Full show notes and resources can be found here: https://passionstruck.com/kris-carr-find-strength-to-face-lifes-challenges/  The Power of Emotions: Kris Carr Shares How to Find Strength in Life's Challenges In this powerful episode of Passion Struck, Kris Carr delves into the importance of embracing vulnerability and harnessing the strength that lies within our emotions. Her personal journey serves as a poignant reminder that unexpected twists can unexpectedly pave the way for profound opportunities for growth and healing. Through her story, Kris Carr inspires readers to navigate the complexities of life with courage and resilience, encouraging them to see adversity not as a barrier but as a catalyst for personal evolution. Brought to you by Hello Fresh. Use code passion16 to get 16 free meals, plus free shipping!” Brought to you by Indeed. Head to https://www.indeed.com/passionstruck, where you can receive a $75 credit to attract, interview, and hire in one place. --► For information about advertisers and promo codes, go to: https://passionstruck.com/deals/  Like this show? Please leave us a review here -- even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter or Instagram handle so we can thank you personally! --► Prefer to watch this interview: https://youtu.be/qIm83_KLRnI  --► Subscribe to Our YouTube Channel Here: https://youtu.be/QYehiUuX7zs  Want to find your purpose in life? I provide my six simple steps to achieving it - passionstruck.com/5-simple-steps-to-find-your-passion-in-life/ Catch my interview with Marshall Goldsmith on How You Create an Earned Life: https://passionstruck.com/marshall-goldsmith-create-your-earned-life/  Watch the solo episode I did on the topic of Chronic Loneliness: https://youtu.be/aFDRk0kcM40  Want to hear my best interviews from 2023? Check out my interview with Seth Godin on the Song of Significance and my interview with Gretchen Rubin on Life in Five Senses. ===== FOLLOW ON THE SOCIALS ===== * Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/passion_struck_podcast * Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/johnrmiles.c0m  Learn more about John: https://johnrmiles.com/  Passion Struck is now on the AMFM247 broadcasting network every Monday and Friday from 5–6 PM. Step 1: Go to TuneIn, Apple Music (or any other app, mobile or computer) Step 2: Search for “AMFM247” Network

Coming up next, on Passion Struck. Healing isn't linear. Grief isn't linear. Recovery is not linear. There's also no timeline. That was so important for me, because it helped me relax. I'm a very driven person. Like, I like control.

I like to get it done. I was like, whoa, this isn't linear. I'm orbiting. And with each orbit, we pass through a deeper layer of meaning. And what I write about in the book is I believe that the mechanism of healing is that orbiting. Is that just going through it? And every time you learn a little bit more about yourself, and maybe you're a little kinder to yourself. Welcome to PassionStruck. Hi, I'm your host, John Armiles.

And on the show, we decipher the secrets, tips, and guidance of the world's most inspiring people and turn their wisdom into practical advice for you and those around you. Our mission is to help you unlock the power of intentionality so that you can become the best version of yourself. If you're new to the show, I offer advice and answer listener questions on Fridays. We have long form interviews the rest of the week

with guest-ranging from astronauts to authors, CEOs, creators, innovators, scientists, military leaders, visionaries, and athletes. Now, let's go out there and become PassionStruck. Hello everyone and welcome back to episode 309 of PassionStruck. Grated by Apple is one of the top 20 most popular health podcasts. And thank you to all of you who come back weekly to listen and learn and live better, be better and impact the world. In case you didn't know, PassionStark is now on syndicated radio on the AMFM247 National broadcast. Patches Monday and Friday from 5 to 6 p.m. links will be in the show notes.

And if you're new to the show, thank you so much for being here or you simply wanna introduce this, to a friend or a family member, we now have episode starder packs, which are collections of our fans' favorite episodes that we've organized in the convenient topics. I give any new listener a great way to get acclimated everything we do here on the show.

Either go to Spotify or passionstruck.com slash starder packs to get started. In case you missed my interview from earlier in the week, I had on Joe Grover, who's a board certified coach and member of the International Coaching Federation in the Harvard Institute of Coaching. In her groundbreaking book, The Choice Point, Joanna equips us with the ability to use functional imagery training to take control of the decisions that define our lives. And if you loved that episode or today's, we would appreciate it.

He gave us a five star rating and review, ensuring this episode with your family and friends. Your ratings and reviews go such a long way into increasing the popularity of the show, but more importantly, bringing people into the passions of our community where we can teach them how to live with intentionality. I also know our guests love to see comments from our listeners. Now, let's talk about today's episode where I sit down with our special guest Chris Car, who has experienced firsthand the challenges of navigating through life's unexpected trials. A few years ago, Chris found herself in a whirlwind of adversity. With her father's illness, the need to adapt her business to the pandemic,

and living with an incurable stage 4 cancer diagnosis for two decades, her world seemed to be crumbling. It all became too much, and in a moment of vulnerability, she allowed herself to fully feel the weight of her emotions, questioning why she had been avoiding them for so long. As she embraced this catharsis, Chris realized the profound impact it had on her well-being. It made her wonder where else in her life had she been suppressing grief. This realization led her on a journey of self-reflection and discovery. In our interview, Chris discusses her latest book, I'm Not A Morning Person, which will be released later this year on September 19, 2023.

Links to preorder will be in the show notes. During our discussion, Chris shares her raw, honest, and sometimes unconventional stories and insights about what happens when life takes an unexpected turn. Whether it's the dissolution of a relationship, or loss of a job, or grappling with illness where the death of a loved one, this interview exploring her book is a reservoir of real-life experiences, practices, and wisdom that can offer solace and support. While Chris doesn't promise a cure all, she offers comfort in a sense of community.

She reminds us that messy emotions can serve as a catalyst for introspection, helping us reassess our priorities and finding resilience. It's about embracing our hearts with bravery and realizing that true freedom lies not in the absence of pain, but in our ability to live fully despite it. Chris Carr is a multi-week, New York Times best-selling author, renowned speaker, and dedicated wellness activist. Chris's incredible journey has inspired millions worldwide, to embrace a life of vitality and purpose. You may recognize Chris as the subject and director of the captivating documentary, Crazy Sexy Cancer, which captivated audiences on TLC in the Oprah Winfrey Network. She is also the author of the critically acclaimed Crazy Sexy Cancer Book Series

that has touched countless lives, but Chris's impact extends far beyond her books and films. Chris's incredible journey and message have garnered attention from major media outlets such as The New York Times, Scientific America, Glamour of Anity Fair, and many more. In a reverent foot soldier in the battle against disease,

Chris empowers individuals to take control of their health and happiness. Her plant, passionate diet, transformative lifestyle practices, and a wholehearted approach to living and loving have become a beacon of hope for countless individuals seeking a vibrant and fulfilling life. So get ready to be inspired as Chris shares her transformative journey. Thank you for choosing PassionStruct and choosing me to be your hosting guide on your journey to creating an intentional life. Now, let that journey begin. I am absolutely thrilled and honored to have Chris Carr join me on Passion Struck. Welcome, Chris.

Thank you. Thank you for having me. Well, it is such an honor to have you here in Tampa. And this is one of the first times we've actually done the podcast in this version. It's actually just incredible to be here sitting next to you. So thank you for coming. I always like to start these interviews out by getting the audience to know you better. There's something in all of us that defines us, there are moments that define us. And there was something that happened to you

when you were nine years old that a father entered your life. And I wanted to ask, what difference did that make? Because in reading your most recent book, I understood it was a profound difference for you and the way that you've lived your life ever since then. Yeah, that's such a beautiful question to start with. Thank you. So I didn't know my biological father until much later in life. And what I realized was that it was a blessing that he was my biological father. It's part of how I'm here. but my chosen father came into my life when I was nine

and that's when I met him for the first time. And at first I was, I was not on board for it because it was my mother, me, and my grandmother. And I was like, who is this guy coming in? I'm the top dog here. Over time, he refused to not love me. And he adapted me and he became my chosen father who made this very big impact on my life and I write a lot about this in my new book.

And then I think there's a difference sometimes between nature and nurture and he was a nurture for me. So thanks for starting with that question. It was a beautiful part of your book and we're going to talk a lot more about Ken during today's interview. I wanted to jump to, for most of us, Valentine's Day has a significance of romance and people think of dinners that they go to when we were younger giving out Valentine's Day cards. But for you, February 14, 2003, took on a completely different meaning.

And for those listeners who might not be familiar with you, I was hoping you can share your story from that vantage point. Yeah, absolutely. I remember writing in my journal Happy Valentine's Day, you have cancer. It was February 14, 2003, as you said, that I was diagnosed with a very rare stage 4 cancer. And the cancer that I still diagnosed with a very rare stage 4 cancer. And the cancer that I still live with, I've been living with cancer for 20 years now, has no cure and no treatment.

It's so many of your listeners, no, I'm sure, especially if you've been through any sort of diagnosis. In the beginning, you're just trying to figure out what's going on, what is this, what do I do about it. And the first doctor that I spoke to suggested a triple organ transplant, because as I said, I have stage four cancer in both my lungs and my liver. And I was like, what? And the next doctor gave me 10 years to live and suggested radical treatment that maybe

wouldn't do anything. And so I decided in that moment, and we were talking about this little, a little earlier, that I had to become the CEO of my health. I had to treat this like a business. I had to find my second in command. I had to learn how to have some leadership skills, some organization skills, to have higher to fire. And when I found my second in command, he was like, here's the thing. This thing is a total black box that you have.

I have a rare sarcoma. Sometimes it can be slow growing, sometimes it can be aggressive, sometimes it can start slow, become aggressive. We don't know so we're going to watch and wait and track you and let cancer make the first move. But you, in the meantime, you're going to go off and watch and live. And at that time, I didn't know what that meant. But I spent the next 20 years figuring that out and then teaching people what I learned. It's such an inspirational story and you've literally touched millions of people throughout the world with the work that you've done. And one of those people that you touched

is my sister. And as we talked about earlier, Carolyn is about ready to celebrate her 50th birthday. But a number of years ago, out of the blue, she was diagnosed herself with her pancreatic cancer. And one of the biggest things that she credits to giving her the strength to continue to fight and to keep this at bay was shifting to a whole food plant-based diet, which is something that you advocate as well.

How did you come to that decision to take that approach and make that a cornerstone of your wellness plan? Research, reading, trying. I realize there's not much I can control, but I can control what I put in my mouth. And truth is, I wasn't feeling great. Anyway, cancer aside, I didn't have the sense of vitality and just feeling well in my body.

And so, I thought, well, why don't I start here? This is the one place that I can make a difference. I can make a change. I can support my body. I can make energy deposits, I can support my body, I can make energy deposits instead of crappy withdrawals. I can do this piece and so I spent a lot of time exploring and really being my own guinea pig.

But when I found really the anti-inflammatory whole foods plant-based diet, it just made so much sense and I started to feel better. And I made the decision to start by healing my gut first and As I was feeling better as I said I started to share this because none of us come with an owner's manual And then when something goes wrong, you're like, what do I do? Where do I go? It's made a very big difference in my life And I'd say the first half of my career and what I've been writing about was really about how can you practice this lifestyle and I came up with what I call the five pillars of wellness so it's about being mindful about optimizing what you're eating, what

you're drinking, what you're thinking, which is super important and sometimes very challenging and how you're resting and renewing and so all that sits on a strong foundation of stress reduction because I believe that stress is really the number one killer. So if we can start to nourish our bodies and nurture ourselves, we are literally participating in our health beyond what we can possibly imagine. But here's the thing. I think sometimes we all make it so complicated.

We want to do it right. We want to get it perfect. we want to get it perfect, and the body is so much more resilient. I say, just get started. So anyway, that's where I began, and that's one of the things that I teach. Well, I think you bringing up stress is such an important aspect of this,

because I know for Carolyn, because we have no markers for pancreatic cancer in her family, and when she thinks back to to what does she think the origin of it was, she thinks it was chronic stress that had been in her life for a very long time, could have been at the root cause of it having a whole bunch of different health impacts. So I think regardless if it's that or something else, learning how to manage your stress is so important. A big element of that to your five pillars is your thoughts, because that inner critic gets the best of us.

It sure does, and I want to also say that you're absolutely right. Epigenetics teaches us that our genes are not our destiny. We come here with a predisposition, we come here with the genes, and we may or may not pull that trigger. But here's the thing, as especially as patients, we can never blame ourselves. I was just doing a keynote the other day and one of the things that I was talking about is, when something happens in our life, when we go through a big rupture and a diagnosis as a rupture, a miscarriage as a rupture, losing your job is a rupture. We've just been through a pandemic. That's a rupture for people.

It's so easy to go into the question why did this happen. And the truth is that there are so many things in life we may never know. And we don't want to stay stuck in the past beating ourselves up, I wish I had done differently. And what I like to suggest, especially to patients or anybody going through a tough time and they're feeling, she said, bad about it. Ask a better

question. The question isn't why the question is, what can I do now to support my body? What can I do now to support my thoughts, my mind, my mental health, my spirit? Those are proactive questions that get us out of the past into the present and into action. No, I think it's a great point and I'm not sure if you're familiar with Dr. Wilkall. Oh yeah. Yeah, recently interviewed Wil and one of the core topics we discussed was shameflamation. Oh, really?

I had never heard of it before and he is so right because there is really this epidemic of shame that people are feeling, but what that shame brings about is inflammatory response to your body. And so people end up because of that feeling of shame and not dealing with some of those emotions, it really causes this knock-on effect of an inflammatory response to their system. So yeah, I think it's such a good point. And also just feeling stuck, feeling stagnant, feeling stuck. When we want to change our lives, when we are experiencing warning signs or wake-up calls, that's our opportunity to get back into alignment and get moving forward.

One of the things I wanted the audience to know about is you did an incredible documentary at the beginning of your journey really. Before many of these books were written, that documentary and your books have really helped people take on better control of their lives, make positive lifestyle changes. I wanted to ask if someone was tuning in today and they're at the beginning of their journey, what are some of the first things that you would encourage them to do to take on a healthier lifestyle? Well first, take a deep breath because sometimes this can be very overwhelming and you don't know where to start or who to listen to or who not to listen to.

And so I'd like to start there, especially if you're somebody who's been newly diagnosed with any kind of medical issue because it comes on fast and furious and you think, oh my gosh, I have no time to figure this out. You have time, breathe. And then I say, look at the pillars, like being mindful, but you're eating, drinking, thinking, resting, renewing. Where do you want to start? Pick one. And start slow. I believe, and I think you do too, in the power of microhabits. slow. I believe and I think you do too, in the power of microhabits. Sometimes we try to go all in and we get overwhelmed and then we, the saying we fall off the wagon. So can you dip your toe in? Can you dip your toe and say the thing that I'm struggling with the most Chris is my sleep? Okay, let's start there. And then once we're starting to build some better sleep hygiene, why don't we look at some other areas? I am very much

for a slow and steady approach. I have an online community and we call it turtle power, because I know what it's like to be on a marathon. And so I think that's a really healthy thing for people to start with. Pick one area, and even if I say of all the things, eating, drinking, thinking, resting, renewing, where are you struggling the most? The renewing pillar is about movement. Okay, let's start there. 10 minutes a day. To bring up your rest pillar, that sleep is one of the most disregarded and most important

pillars of health. Because I found myself, I was not getting good rest. And it has such a knock-on effect on your cognition, on your relationships, on just how you feel, your willingness to want to exercise, and so many other things. And I really believe people don't put enough emphasis on it, and it needs to become a much more important aspect of so many people's lives. Why do you think it's such an easy one for us to disregard? Because of our hustle culture, it's just like, we're in it to win it, we're in it to push and burn

and crash and you think I'm gonna sleep later, or somebody said to me the other day, I'll sleep when I'm dead, I'm like, oh, don't put that out there. I think we take it for granted. I took a lot of these things for granted, and there's no shame in that, especially when I was a lot younger.

I thought, I'll get that together later in life. And then when I had my wake up call, I was like, what if there is in the later in life? I got to get this together now. And sleep can be a really tricky one for people. So I think just spending a little time understanding proper sleep hygiene, and one of the things I teach my community is tuck yourself in like a toddler. We as adults we just keep going, we push it past

the time where we know we would get some good rest and we're staying up late, we're getting up early and we're just expecting ourselves to plop down, hit the pillow and go to sleep or we are reading news and freaking our nervous systems out. So what would you do with a toddler? Would you give this toddler some time, read a book, make sure there's cozy pajamas, a glass of water, maybe a good night kiss, I love you, I hope you have beautiful dreams. You would back in from the time you want the toddler

to actually have lights out. And so I think we just could take a page from some good parenting skills for ourselves. I think you couldn't have said that any better. And I think it comes down to the choices as you said, these micro decisions that we make throughout the day. And I remember I was interviewing Robin Sharma and we were having this conversation and he's gets this plethora of minute decisions that you make throughout your life that ends up becoming either your tsunami of greatness or your tsunami of demise. And it was such a powerful

way to approach it because at first when you start making these changes even if it's changing a sleep pattern, it's difficult at first. I'm a big believer in his 5am club so I try to get up early because it gives me time to do the most important things for me, for self-care, things like journaling, meditating, reading, exercising. But I have to tell you, when I first started, it was so hard. But once you start making those changes, before you know it, one good habit builds upon another one. And next thing you know, you're then able, as you mentioned,

you pick a starting point, you can then, once you start building that foundation, it's so much easier to pivot to other things, to add into it, which then allows you to take on the other pillars that you're talking about. Because I think when people think about you want me to change my whole life around, it becomes enormous at the beginning because you're thinking about this huge thing that I've got to change. But to your point, if you break it down into just a starting point and then small transitions from there, it becomes so much more manageable.

It's so well said. And I think such a helpful message because it's so easy to struggle and to easy to get overwhelmed when you're trying to change your life. So I really appreciate that you're talking about this. If people want to learn more about this, I'm just going to put up your book here, because this is just one of your books. That is actually your second book. But you have written so much about diet and lifestyle and all those things, but you have

a new book coming out this September, and I wanted to ask you, how did you come up with the title? I am not a morning person? Well that was a tough one I'll tell you and morning for all of you who are curious this is a book about grief and loss and so morning is MOUR and ING and I had worked on this book for three years and I'll just back up for a minute I feel like a good portion of my the first half of my career and I've been doing this for 20 years now was really helping people getting my involved about what they're eating. And then, in my own journey as a cancer patient, first and foremost, and a wellness advocate,

I realized, it's not just about what we're eating in the lifestyle practices. It's also about addressing what's eating us. And sometimes when we don't address what's eating us, all the kale in the world isn't as valuable. And so, cut to my dad who adopted me Ken being diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. And I feel like everything that I have learned and I have taught was a dress rehearsal

for what we would go through with him. And it started with his diagnosis. And I realized that grief, something that I hadn't really explored, even the grief of my own diagnosis, even the grief of not meeting my biological father until much later in life and then ultimately not having a relationship with him. I thought I had processed, but I remember when my therapist said to me, when the grief train pulls into the station, it brings all the cars. Even stuff you thought you were over. And it also brings these big, messy emotions that feel like a tsunami, you use the word

tsunami, feels like a tsunami that will overtake you. And I think so many of us probably hold that back. Maybe it's not just me who, if I go there, I'm gonna fall apart. If I go there, these emotions are gonna wipe me out. And so we push them down, we push them in our tissues, we keep on trucking, and we bury the pain. And for me, when my dad was diagnosed and all this other stuff was coming up for me,

there was no more opportunity to bury the pain. It was time to actually really work through it. And so, you say, where did the title come from? So, a little author backstory, you work on your titles, you know. You have a Google talk, you're like, list, I don't like, oh, no, this is it, it's not coming. This is too schmaltzy. This is too on the nose. What am I going to do? And honestly, when I don't know what to do,

I go to one of the sources that I love, which is stand up comedy. And I was like, I gotta get some comedy. I gotta get some, because I have a lot of humor in this book, because I think humor is medicine. I need some other voices to untapped my blocked creativity. And then I started to listen to comedians who were talking about grief.

And I was riveted. It was just such an amazing way to explore such a difficult, honestly taboo topic that so many of us don't touch or we get wrong. And that's when the title came to me. And I was like, like boom and I told my editor and she says this is either brilliant or it's really dumb. I'm like well that's great. Let's hope it's brilliant. I love the book and I really liked how at

the beginning you talked about that there are really two types of grief. There's the grief of one a person leaves us, but there's another grief, which is just as powerful, and we sometimes don't think about, which is anticipatory grief. And unfortunately, cancer has touched me too many times in my life. My paternal grandfather died of lung cancer, my maternal grandmother died of lung cancer, my maternal grandmother died of lung cancer, my fiancee died of cancer, my best friend died of cancer. And after a while, you just want to become numb to the emotions because it's much easier

when you're feeling the grief. And oftentimes when you're watching someone who's dying, you are grieving inside it. It's not an easy process. What happened for you that you learned how to start embracing these intense emotions instead of what a lot of people, including myself, do, which is take them in, which ultimately just numb me out?

First of all, I'm very sorry for all of your losses. That's big stuff, and it's really tough stuff. And I start there because sometimes we don't know what to say. It's scary when somebody tells us what's on their heart because I think most of us don't want to get it wrong. And what I have learned even in my first book, I called it Crazy, Sexy, Cancer, FOPOS. And it was like the things that people said or didn't say and I just realized

honestly we're all struggling with this stuff so just being able to acknowledge you and everything you've been through I think is important to do. Anticipatory grief and just going back to that for a second. I didn't know about that even though I am also somebody who has experienced a lot of loss, and I remember sitting across the table having dinner with my dad when he was still alive, and I was thinking about when he wouldn't be here, and I was feeling so guilty about it. And then I was thinking, if I keep thinking about this, will I contribute to bringing it on?

Like our brains go to all of these places, because we're scared. And that's honestly when I got back into therapy and I learned about anticipatory grief. He was still here, but I was grieving. I was grieving the cancer. I was grieving the life that I thought we were gonna have, even while he was still

here, a life where he wasn't debilitated by chemo and radiation and all the treatments that were prolonging his life. And I was grieving parts of myself from when I had cancer. Or I still have cancer, but from my new diagnosis. And honestly, it was more painful to hold that stuff back in. It kept me from being present with him. It kept me from being happy in my own body, in my own life, in my own marriage,

in my own relationships. And I was like, you know what? This is brave work. This is why it's hard. You gotta be brave. But if I have learned anything, it's like through bravery, through courage, that's how you become confident.

That's how you develop these skills. You have nothing to lose. And even me talking to my dad, when we knew he wasn't going to make it, starting to talk about dying. And I was so scared to talk about it. And I talked to my therapist, she said, start by talking about it. Are you

interested in having this conversation? Am I dad what? But I wasn't ready for it. And I said, well, let's talk about how the conversation is going to go. And let me tell you that I'm afraid to get it wrong. I'm afraid to fall apart. I'm afraid I'm going to cry in front of you, and that'll make you feel bad. And just getting it out there and having this really honest conversation, we are able to talk about death and his dying and was healing for both of us. It was really healing for him too,

because he felt so alone. Well, I think because of that and the relationship that you had with him, I remember a moment where you were talking to him, you were both sharing a gin and tonic where you were talking to him, you were both sharing a gin and tonic, and you were talking about hemorrhoids because of all his treatments had discomfort. But what really struck me is because you were able to open yourself up like that. It allowed your dad, who, as I was reading this had tremendous amount of guts because he started to realize his

how fragile life, how fragile his life had become, his faults that he was leaning into, but some of the life lessons that he imparted. And for people who don't know, you shared the stage with some huge people. Oprah Winfrey, you just came off a conference that you were one of the keynote speakers at that Gabby Bernstein was there, Brennan-Boutchard, Mel Robbins, but was so meaningful for me to hear given all these people who are these titans of transformation, you said that your dad taught you well beyond what you ever heard from them. And I thought it was so powerful. And I was hoping maybe you could share some of the life lessons that he imparted on you. Oh, that's so wonderful.

Thank you for sharing that and saying that. Yeah, and I just want to go back and say, it's not easy to start to feel your feelings. And I appreciate you reading my book. You're one of the first people who have read the book. So it's just very wonderful. It's for me. And it's a wonderful book. So when it becomes available for pre-order, which

will be when this podcast comes out, please pre-order it because you will not regret it. I share the moments where it was really brutal to feel the feelings and how I was really holding it back. And so I don't want to make light of how hard it is to tap into this, but I will say there's so much freedom on the other side. My dad had really great sayings, just like my therapist

from Brooklyn. But as his time was winding down, his fatherly advice was wretcheding up. And some stuff would be just like trading your car after 50,000 miles. And I think some of the really profound things that I always come back to is one of the things he would say to me, especially his business owners and business leaders, is do the hard thing first, make the hard call, send the hard email, get it out of the way, get it behind

you. Sometimes we go for the low-hanging fruit fruit and we miss out on the big opportunities or just to get some of that stress out because you're like, you don't want to deal with something. Just do the hard thing first. Another thing and I was sharing some of this in my keynote is say I love you. If you feel it, say it because life is short. And we know this, but sometimes it's awkward and we don't share what's on our hearts and just like to go for that Yeah, especially with her friends with our friends and that's what he would say like towards the end of his life

He was telling his friends how much he loved them. These are his golf buddies This was not the language that they spoke but I feel like he opened hearts on that golf course But one of the things that I love the most that he shared with me was to make your golden years now. And he talked about how so often we wait for all the ducks to be in a row, we think once all this stuff, these obligations, these deadlines are over, then I'll even take care of myself. But I got to get this stuff behind me before I can go do that stuff. And in his experience of a life that was cut short, his golden years were so much shorter than he had hoped for because he was just

about retiring, he was selling his business, my father had a paving company. And so what he had a transition to, which I found so inspiring was, okay, maybe I don't have all of these years ahead, but I am going to make golden moments. And it's very Buddhist in a lot of ways, the golden moments of being with my friends and family, actually really being with them, even when I'm with them, sometimes we can be someplace else, right? And most importantly, making peace with himself.

Letting go of the anxiety, forgiving himself for whatever shortcomings, and really befriending himself. I honestly, watching him do that in this last five years, that is when I said, yeah, I've been on the stages with Wayne Dyer, I've been on the stages with some of the biggest titans of transformation, and seeing somebody in the day to day make that kind of transformation before they pass on

to the next stage of wherever we're going. It changed me at the cellular level. Yeah, I want more of that. So powerful. And God bless when Dwyer Weta and amazing influence he has had on so many people. So many. We all felt him with us as we can this is where a house of Bench I just was listening to an episode of Gabby Bernstein's

Podcast and she was talking about how she still feels he's in the spiritual world influencing us and had reached this point where he had Manifested himself in a way that he had helped humanity to a point where his words and wisdom will transform people for decades and centuries to come. No doubt. I wanted to ask you because your dad was reminiscing about things that were great in his life, but things he also wished he probably could have done a little

bit differently. It was interesting last year, I'm not sure if you're familiar with this gentleman I interviewed a Hindu priest named Don De Pani. And he said something to me that at the time didn't seem profound, but since then I've really thought about. And he said, people say life is short. He goes, when I was a Hindu monk, one of the things I learned from my teachers is that life is finite. And there's a really big difference between life is short and life is finite. And I think many of

us come to the realization that we're not living life as fully as we could. What do you think stops us from doing so and keeps us stuck? Fear. I think fear stops us. I think that fear comes on and our bodies get flooded with cortisol and we start to shut down and we go into survival mode. And oftentimes where we go is I'm not good enough, I can't do this. And we go into comparison. We go into all of those places that keep us playing small.

And fear has a cousin, and they roll together, and that's anxiety. So fear comes on in a moment, and anxiety is ruminating. The fear of what could happen. And so, one of the things that I have learned as a patient living with stage 4 cancer is I have to learn how to connect with and have a relationship with my fear. And I often tell people like I just invited to tea. These are just parts of ourselves

like little kids inside of us. And invited to tea, so come sit down with me. Tell me what's on your heart. Let's chew on this, what's going on? And sometimes when you just put it out there, you say it out loud, just the act of getting it out of your body into the world can help you look at it from a different perspective or at least breathe through it.

And that'll often happen for me when I'm at the Cancer Hospital. I go and get my scans every five years now just to check in to see where the baseline is. And I'll feel those feelings of fear and anxiety, but I've had so much time to really develop that relationship. I'll go to the bathroom and say, I got you. Where are you at? What's going on? What's on your heart right now?

I love you. Breathe. Let's get through this. Sometimes when we're in these places of fear and anxiety, the best thing to do is to change our state. That's what Tony Robbins says, right? Because we can't always solve the problems with the mind with the mind. So get in your body.

Go just change the environment. Go for a walk. Call a friend. Say, hey, I got to talk through this thing. It's driving me nuts. But change your physical state. To get in the body. Dr. Judson Brewer, he's amazing.

He talks so much about how anxiety can become habitual. You mentioned habits earlier when we start to think about it, we have to stop the habit so that it doesn't spin out. And we sap it just by first and foremost, acknowledging it. Just insert another thought. Yeah, Dr. Judd is great. Yeah, isn't he amazing? He is amazing. Someone I'm going to put it out there to the universe. I'd love to have him on the show too.

If you would have a great conversation, I know that. Well, I have to tell you, I am a person who has experienced my fair share of trauma. And I'd like to be vulnerable about it because I think a lot of people aren't. And what happened to me is I tried to bury it. I tried to ignore it because I was so focused on other things in my life. I thought this stuff will just go away.

And over time, when it ends up happening, it doesn't. And it starts affecting all aspects of your life. And what happened to me is I reached a point where I just became emotionally numb. And I sought out help. I had gotten better. And a number of years went by, and then in 2017, I came home to an intruder in my house who was doing an in-home robbery and had a gun pointed at me. And coming out of that, I, again, was going into this thing

where I wasn't processing the trauma. I wasn't allowing myself to feel the grief. I wasn't allowing myself to feel that emotion. And my life started to unravel again. And it was then that I took the step and forced myself to go back. And I did cognitive processing therapy and then I did prolonged exposure therapy and then I did EMDR, which you wrote about in the book.

And I have to tell you, these things were not easy, but the other side of it is so much better than what I was feeling before. And this is something that you cover as well in the book. And I just wanted the listener or viewer to understand why is it so important that we don't let these things longer like I did and that we address some head-on earlier? Well you addressed it when you were ready to address it which is really great. I love what Gaboramate talks about and he says, trauma isn't what happens to you, it's what happens inside of you. And we hold these things in our bodies whether we're conscious of it or not. And I think

that's some of the greatest part of the work that you're doing is like just helping people to become more aware of how it all connects. And when we're able to access these parts of ourselves, quite honestly, and really parent them and help them heal, help them feel seen and heard and know that they matter and know that there's meaning, then we're able to really restore ourselves to that wholeness. When we've gone through trauma, we do need support. We do need therapeutic support. You talked about EMDR.

You talked about cognitive behavioral therapy, somatic experience, because again, a lot of the stuff is stored in the body. Gabor would be a great person for you to connect with. Oh my goodness. And so if you feel like you're stuck or there's parts of your life that are stuck or there's parts of your body that are stuck, maybe there's something for us to just work through or look at or to say, you know what, I'm going to reach out and get that support just so I can start to explore this.

It's not something for us to explore alone, but I think it opens up a portal to healing beyond what we imagine and a portal to resilience and also to vibrancy. I want to say one thing, there's a difference between healing and curing. So I'm not cured, right? I may never be cured, but the work that I have done, I'm on the healing path. Curing takes place in the body, but healing takes place in the spirit. And that's available to each and every one of us up until and beyond our last breath. I think that's so important because I think each and every one of us would be rare,

extremely rare for no one to face adversity or trauma. In fact, if you haven't, I would say it's the opposite. There is something wrong with you to not have felt that, but I'm not sure I'll ever be completely healed from the trauma, but to your point, it's something that you are constantly processing. It's something that you can use to make you stronger, to make you do better introspection, which I think so many of us feel to really do as much as we need to. I thought it was one of the most important chapters of the book.

If I have it, of course, chapter 10, and you were talking about the need for self-love, which is something that is a common message that you have given out to your community. But I think it's so hard for so many of us to do. But if we want to be kind to others, if we want to be the person that we can be, it starts with self-love. And I was hoping that you could share some more of that

because I thought you did such a great job in that chapter. Thank you, thank you. There's this great quote that I talk about in the book. It's Carl Jung and he talks about how we orbit through the same themes all throughout our lives. And so many times we'll beat ourselves up. Healing isn't linear. Grief isn't linear.

Recovery is not linear. Grief isn't linear. Recovery is not linear. There's also no timeline. And I feel like that was so important for me because it helped me relax. I'm a very driven person. I like control. I like to get it done. I was like, whoa, this isn't linear. I'm orbiting. And with each orbit, we pass through a deeper layer of meaning. I believe that the mechanism of healing is that orbiting. Is that just going through it? And every time you learn a little bit more about yourself, and maybe you're a little kinder to yourself.

And so when we think about self love, you can be like, oh, that sounds like really woo. What does that mean? I love myself. I don't love myself all the time. There's parts of myself I really do not like. But you know what I'm committed to? Compassion. I'm committed to curiosity. I'm committed to being kind to myself above anything else. And that is self-love. It really is. And so I remember I did a

workshop many years ago when I was teaching Mirrorwork, which is Louise Hayes' work. And I thought that this was so innocuous. I was new at teaching live workshops too and so I had everybody in the workshop have a little ham here and all you needed to do was look in mirror and say, I love you Chris or your name, I love you, fill in the blank, I really love you. I thought this is lovely, this is easy. A woman got out of her seat and flew to the front of the class to chew me out. To tell me, I will never say that to myself and how dare you tell me I have to. And I was like, oh my gosh, I had no idea how triggering it can be to look in the mirror and say, I love you to yourself. And then so if any of you feel that way, first of all, it's great work.

But lean into it with kindness. Am I going to let myself off the hook more? Am I going to choose another thought? I don't remember who said this, but we can't choose our first thought, but we can always choose our second thought. Right? The first thought shoots up into your brain, and maybe it's a really scary thought, right? But we can choose our second thought. And what would a better thought be? What would a kinder thought be? And if you don't know what to say, what you can say to yourself, what do I think a self-loving person would say? And then take that first spin.

It's really just like walking around talking to yourself, which I do a lot. And some people are like, who is that lady? Is she OK? I'm like, yeah. What's so powerful? I remember this interview I did. And it was one of the first ones I ever did on this podcast.

And I try, as I told told you to do at least one episode a quarter about cancer but I especially like to interview cancer survivors and I found this lady in England named Sasuke Lightstar and I love her name but in our interview it was so powerful because she talked about how for so many years she thought that it was her beauty and having to be that vibrant person that defined her. She ended up realizing that she completely hated herself. And as she was going through her cancer treatments, she decided to start doing the mirror work. And she said it took her about a month of doing it religiously,

because at first she'd look at the image and she hated what she saw. But by doing this continually, it's really, she ended up manifesting love in herself and it ended up changing her entire life. And she credits that self-love with giving her the strength to fight her breath cancer but more importantly to live her life completely different and now she talks about how on the other side of this she has found so much more meaning and purpose and it's just lit a fuse inside of her that she can't turn off.

So I'm so glad you brought that work up. That's beautiful. Well, you talk about a number of other emotions in the book and one of the ones that I think is hard for us to deal with is anger. And you told an interesting story about coming out of a restaurant and you were with your father. And I was hoping you might be able to share what happened because I think anyone who would have been faced with your situation would have had anger. But so many of us don't know how to deal with our anger or we don't know how to express it in the right ways. Yeah.

I dealt with a lot of anger throughout this process. I was angry at cancer. I was angry. And this chapter is called becoming, unbecoming. It's something that my grandmother used to say, that's a very unbecoming emotion, right? She's of that time. And particularly for women to share. It's one of the big emotions that we bury.

And I cite a lot of different research in it, but what I've come to realize is anger is an indicator emotion, right? It's not just anger. Anger is the tip of the iceberg. Anger is saying, hey, owch, something's up, but there's usually a lot more underneath it. And so anger can also be a protector.

And anger is a wonderful emotion. It's just about understanding how to work with that anger, as opposed to shaming that anger, or feeling like there's something deficient about me because I'm angry. It's like, anger's got messages for you. But I wasn't really dealing with those messages throughout that process.

And so there's a couple of moments in that chapter where I reveal really to tell you the honest truth, this is the first time that anybody's asked me about it. So that were really embarrassing for me. I was like, am I going to write about this? Am I really going to go there? And I thought, yeah, I have to, because this is what happened. And maybe it's not what happened to you. But maybe when you were reading that story, maybe you were like. And maybe it's not what happened to you,

but maybe when you were reading that story, maybe you're like, oh, that's not what happened to me. But I understand what she's talking about there. And so, in this particular anger scene, I'm coming out of this restaurant and with my father, I'm really trying to make the moments matter. We're on a bucket list, basically, of all the places we want to go and see and the time we want to spend together.

And we're at a beautiful place and we're in Newport. And I'm coming out of the restaurant and we're getting back into our car. And these three drunk guys come up. The valet brings the car around and they think that the car is their uber, basically. And I'm like, hey, guys, it's a minivan. It's like not a newber. And I was like, hey, guys, it's a minivan, it's like not a new burr. And I was like, hey, this is our car, but they get into the car. And one of the guys comes around and he puts his arm around me and he starts coming on to me. And he's come drinking with us. And I was like, it took me by surprise, it's such surprise that

they're in the car. This guy is touching me. The sky is coming onto me. I'm saying, take your hand off me. No. And then finally, he says something to me, which I won't repeat, but people in the book can hear it, because I'm rejecting him. And he says something that's really offensive to me. And I lose my crap. I just go from zero to 90.

And every expletives coming out of my crap. I just go from zero to 90 and every expletives coming out of my mouth and I'm thinking to myself later, can you imagine if somebody you knew like one of your readers was there and saw you just losing your crap on these guys, on these drunk guys, but what was really happening was how dare you ruin this time? Every moment matters with my dad, and I was angry, and I was angry at cancer for taking him, and I was just so furious, and it just, all the stuff I had been

smushing down came pouring out. Then I was filled with shame, because my dad's standing there. He's so rattled by what's happening. It's obviously a security came. It was like a thing. And I'm thinking, I can't believe he saw that this happened. He saw that I reacted that way.

Meanwhile, I reacted in a way because of all the things that I share, but also this was a really gross moment. But I thought, oh, he doesn't think I have my stuff together. I want him to think that when he goes I'm going to be able to like take care of things and it just put me into this spiral After that and I thought, oh my gosh All of these Incidents and these moments in our lives. They're just opportunities. You go, okay. I got some stuff here This is where I'm going to shine the light.

Well, thank you for sharing that because I know it wasn't an easy story for you to write about. But I also think the situation you were immersed into was completely inappropriate as well. But it's hard when you're in situations like that, not to lose it. Totally. It is and there were other moments too and quite honestly each one of them were just as I said

indicators to me. Not for me to be angry at anger, not for me to shut down because I got angry, not for me to shame myself because I got angry or for me to say what's underneath this anger? I think the curiosity is really one of the key things for us to hold in our hearts and to foster and to allow curiosity about how you feel. Curiosity about what's going on. I feel like curiosity is a gateway to all healing. And when you're in situations like this or when you're going through what you've had to, I know boundaries can be another thing that a lot of us don't get.

What's some of your advice on that? Because I recently interviewed Terry Cole who was awesome. I brought her on because I think so many of us don't know how to establish healthy boundaries. But when you're in your situation and you have this terminal illness and all of us face terminal illnesses, if you think about it. Well life is a terminal condition. Exactly. Well that's exactly what I'm saying. But it's hard to put out the right boundaries with people. What are some of the recommendations that you have? I feel like it starts with you.

Terry's a dear friend of mine, and I love how she says it. Basically, boundaries are your willingness to share what your preferences are. Boundaries for me are my willingness to take care of myself. What works for me and what doesn't work for me. And it takes courage to make boundaries, but courage really is another part of our healing. Because you don't want to let yourself down.

You know, you're going to let people down. Not everybody's going to like you. Being a people, please, or will drain you. Not everybody is for you. But we sacrifice and sacrifice because we don't want to ruffle feathers. But who's feathers we ruffle the most? Our own.

You know what that creates? Stress. ruffle feathers, but whose feathers we ruffle the most are own. You know what that creates? Stress and inflammation and a lack of passion and purpose. And so I feel like boundaries are an important part of it. Her book Boundary Boss is amazing, it's such a strong book to learn these things. But if you just come back to saying, boundaries are really about me being courageous enough to share my preferences with people and start there even when it's uncomfortable.

Yeah, such a strong message. So thank you for sharing that. Another area that you talk about in the book and I think it's so important to discuss is depression and the impact that it's having on so many people. It's not only depression, but anxiety. I recently had Chris Palmer on the podcast, and he is a psychologist at Harvard, but he's been doing this research, trying to examine why is so much of our mental health on the rise in all areas,

but also the largest groups that it's increasing in are some of the youngest populations. So the ones that they have on record are 18 to 22, but he feels that kids even younger than that, which they can't do studies on are having even worse implications. He believes that mental health disorders are metabolic disorders, and that everything is coming from our gut into the way that we're approaching our lives.

You think there's truth to that based on your work with wellness? I think that there is, and I think that there isn't one truth, right? So I think that people can experience depression for a lot of different reasons, but we know that the gut is the second brain. We know the serotonin that's created in the gut, right? Making sure that we're taking care of our guts is absolutely essential, not only for our mental well-being, but also for our immunity. But depression is very real and it comes on in many different ways. I don't know if there's one solution. I'm certainly not an expert on depression.

But when you think about what you just shared about kids and younger kids, look at the world we're in now. It's a world where we're all feeling very disconnected. And technology is fantastic because it brings us together, but it also keeps us apart. And I think there's so much more coming out now in so many studies that are sharing this information, especially about kids and teen suicide and all of this epidemic of loneliness. And so if we're looking to treat things like depression or support things like suppression, depression. One of the things that I think is very powerful is to

focus on connection because we are all in this together. For me a big part of that was as I said going back to therapy, doing the work that we have been talking about, being willing to go to the scary places with support. And also, for me, it was a period of time where I really needed medication. And I felt a lot of shame around that because I'm a wellness advocate. In our wellness world, there's a lot of people who are very outspoken about that somehow you're failing if you're using medication and for me it was a bridge It helped me get out of some the lowest points so that I could Continue my healing process, but I wasn't just using medication. I was also doing all the therapeutic work

There's a lot of reasons why people are very weary of medication. There's a lot of side effects. We have a lot of stories of understanding the downside to medication, the downside to big pharma. But for me, I blessed it, and I used it, and it got me through my father's death and how painful that time was. It was part of my toolkit.

It didn't get me through it. I want to clarify that. It was part of my toolkit in addition to taking care of my body, doing my best to take care of my mind and using this bridge. And so I wanted to share that because it would be inauthentic of me to not mention that was part of what I used for support while also totally understanding how many people that has not worked for. Well, I'm glad you brought that topic up because I recently had

Julian Holt Unstead, who is one of the foremost authorities on loneliness she teaches at Bring Him Young. And so that's an episode for listeners to go back to if you want to learn more about loneliness and its causes. But I also had on Bob Waldinger, who leads the Harvard Adults Study of Development, which has shown looking at now 80 years of research that human connection is the number one thing for longevity, for happiness,

for ultimately people feeling success. So thank you for also addressing that. One last thing I wanted to talk about, that you write about in the book, is, people see people like you, or they see Susan Cain, who recently came out and talked about the fact that she was burned out and needed to take a step away. But in the book you write about how you had a ton of things going on in your life and it eventually caused you yourself to become burned out. And I think people don't want to talk about it.

I found myself completely burned out at one point. What are some of the signs that a person could look for to know that they're on this path before they reach perhaps the point you did or I know that I did where when you reached where I was at you have to do a lot of grounding to get back. Yeah, exhaustion, impatience, overwhelm, decision fatigue, loss of memory, a lack of desire to move my body to take care of myself. Like I was really in a place where it's grateful for as I am for my life and as I was at that time, I just wanted all the stuff to stop. I was saying yes and not saying no. I was saying yes to other people, yes to other obligations, yes to commitments,

and I was saying no to myself. And I knew something had to give. But the thing is, you know this when you're running your own business, it's like a centrifugal force. It's almost like I didn't know how to get off of the hamster wheel. I didn't know how to slow it down so I could turn it around. Then the pandemic, then my dad's diagnosis. Yeah. And I was like, well, I gotta do this.

I gotta stop. I gotta rethink how I'm living my life. One of the things that you mention in the book is I have three affirmations that I say every morning. And I either do it looking up at the moon or if I'm lucky enough that I catch a sunrise, I love to do it then. But one of them is, and I'll say it a little bit differently than your dad told you is I always say

Stop breaking the promises that you make to yourself and I know it was one of the final things that your dad told you And I was hoping you might just unpack that a little bit because for me We make these promises. I've made so many in my life and then you end up breaking them and it really is I think, one of the biggest services we do to ourselves because these promises are the things that make us stronger. They're the things that give us the foundation to then take that next step, that next risk we want to impose on ourselves. So I thought it was extremely important advice. Such a valuable bit of advice that I always will hold on to because I think that's another thing that leads us to burnout. And one of the things that I got from that was when we make promises to ourselves and we continually break them. What are we really breaking?

We're breaking trust. We no longer trust ourselves. We don't trust that we will have our own backs. On regular days let alone in our time of great need. And each and every one of us will have a time of great need because none of us are immune as we talk to about the top from ruptures. So building trust with yourself is literally, I think, the most important aspect of the relationship that you build with yourself because you know you got you. As I mentioned earlier, such an important part because my other affirmations that I do is I say I'm grateful. I am giving.

I am forgiving. My life is beautiful. Creative, prosperous, productive, and magical. But I also say this saying don't break the promises you give to yourself exactly for that reason, because it's that trust in who you want to be, your aspirations for the future, the life that you want to lead. And if you start breaking those promises and those actions or in actions that are stopping you from becoming your most fulfilled self, then you're doing yourself a huge disservice, which is why it's always the

third affirmation I say to myself. The last thing I always like to ask in an interview especially when you have a new book coming out and I'll tell the audience that this book is really different than any of the other books that you wrote. I felt it was part memoir, part self-help book, part and exploration of emotions through storytelling. A listener to the show or a person who picks up the book, what are some of the key things that you hope they take away from it? Our big messy emotions, this is something I write about

in the book. They help us when we're willing to embrace them, when we're willing to befriend them, when we're willing to even just get to know them. They teach us how to be free. They don't teach us how to be free from pain, because we'll never be completely free from pain, right? This is a normal process. But they teach us how to be free from holding back,

free from the barriers that keep us from living fully. I was joking, it's like this book is about what to expect when you're not expecting your life to fall apart and some tools and some strategies and a lot of stories and hopefully some inspiration and most importantly a whole lot of hope. And a whole lot of love. And a whole lot of love, yes.

Well Chris, thank you so much for joining me here today in Tampa. I am so honored to have you here and you have touched so many people's lives. So thank you so much for the work that you're doing. Thank you for your invitation. I thoroughly enjoyed that interview with Chris Carr. Oh my God was a special one. And I wanted to thank Chris and Hay House for the honor and privilege of having her appear on today's show. Links to all things Chris will be in the

show notes at passionstruck.com. Please use our website links if you purchase any of the books from the guests that we feature on the show. As I mentioned during this episode, Chris's book launches on September 19th and we all know how important those pre-orders are. So please go and purchase a copy of our book. Videos are on YouTube at John Armiles and PassionStruck Clips. Avertiser deals and discount codes are in one community place at PassionStruck.com slash deals. As I mentioned at the beginning, we are now on the AMFM 247 National Broadcast.

You can catch us every Monday and Friday from 5 to 6 p.m. Links will also be in the show notes. I'm on LinkedIn where you can sign up for my newsletter or you can catch me on all the socials at John Armiles where I post daily doses of inspiration. And if you want to know how I book amazing guests like Chris Carr, it's because of my network. Go out there and build yours before you need it. You're about to hear a preview of the PassionStrike podcast that I did with Dr. Kennell Cowan and Dr. David Kipper, who have uncovered the breakthrough science of

neural transmitters and why they reveal a clear path to overcoming bad habits that sabotage your success, in career, love, and healthy living. We discuss their groundbreaking book, Override, Discover Your Brain Type, why you do what you do, and how to do it better. What we found in our research was that we are sorted out into two different brain types. We each fit into one of these brain types. They're

based on a deficiency in one of two neurotransmitters that we inherit. So we don't actually have a choice about which team we're on. And one of the transmitters is dopamine, which is a more activating neurotransmitter, and the other transmitter is serotonin, which is a more calming neurotransmitter. And to go a little deeper, these two interfacing transmitter types are necessary for evolution in order for the species to evolve and not just in humans, but in all animals.

Remember, we rise by lifting others, so please share the show with someone that we love and care about. It was such powerful and inspirational message. In the meantime, do your best to apply what you hear on the show, so that you can live what you listen. And until next time, go out and become PassionStruck. you