Passion Struck with John R. Miles - Midori Verity On Identifying Your Zone of Genius EP 34

Episode Date: June 8, 2021

Have you wondered how to build success in your start-up? It starts by creating passion with the entrepreneurial success triangle that helps you identify your zone of genius. Thank you for listening to the Passion Struck podcast. In this powerful interview, Midori Verity and John R. Miles discuss creating passion with the entrepreneurial success triangle. New Interviews with the World's GREATEST high achievers will be posted every Tuesday with a Momentum Friday inspirational message! Midori and John talk about many entrepreneurial topics today and go into how you stop self-sabotaging your life. Her three keys for living her own life. The success triangle that she uses to coach entrepreneurs. We discuss vibrational energy and how that vibrational energy can make such an impact on either you having a positive outcome or a negative one. We also talk about what it means to live a pinball life and go over the Bee and Turtle effect. And so much more!! Identifying Your Zone of Genius Show Notes Adapting through the entrepreneurial success triangle How are values and beliefs different Having a narrative with ourselves Why we ask others for permission How to stop self-sabotaging OKR goal setting Bee and Turtle Effect Finding Our zone of genius Importance of constantly learning The Mosquito Principle Importance of vibrational energy Quotes from Midori Verity "When you get up being ground in the dirt, you're more likely to grow." "Values, that's something true to your core, right? When you have your core values, that's something that makes your heart sing, that's something that we protect." "I see so many entrepreneurs who don't have time to get clear on what's really going on and recognize the patterns because they're just so busy being busy." "Your aspirational goal is that one that's in alignment with your passion, and what moves you and is the mission of your organization." Resources:  Book by Don Miguel Ruiz :https://www.amazon.com/Four-Agreements-Practical-Personal-Freedom/dp/1878424319 Follow Midori Verity *Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midoriverity/ *LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/midoriverity/ *Website: https://fueltofire.co/ *Twitter: https://twitter.com/ MidoriVerity As a mindset coach, TV show host, and seasoned entrepreneur for 25+ years, Midori Verity assists ambitious professionals to unlock their potential by replacing their subconscious mental barriers. Midori is the CEO and Co-founder of ‘Fuel to Fire Entrepreneur Group,’ focused on helping members achieve massive goals using the Entrepreneur Success Triangle. This approach implements Accountability, Systems, and Coaching. ENGAGE With John R. Miles * Subscribe to my channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/JohnRMiles * Leave a comment, 5-star rating (please!) * Support me: https://johnrmiles.com * Twitter: https://twitter.com/Milesjohnr * Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Johnrmiles.c0m​. * Medium: https://medium.com/@JohnRMiles​ * Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/john_r_miles   JOHN R. MILES * https://johnrmiles.com/my-story/ * Guides: https://johnrmiles.com/blog/ * Coaching: https://passionstruck.com/coaching/ * Speaking: https://johnrmiles.com/speaking-business-transformation/ * Gear: https://www.zazzle.com/store/passion_struck   PASSION STRUCK *Subscribe to Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-passion-struck-podcast/id1553279283 *Website: https://passionstruck.com/ *About: https://passionstruck.com/about-passionstruck-johnrmiles/ *Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/passion_struck_podcast *LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/passionstruck *Blog: https://passionstruck.com/blog/  

Things that you do, the reading that you do, the setting that you do, doing the research on the internet, it's a compounding effect. And so even though you might not see it in a week or in two weeks or in a year, if you stick with it, you will start to see a payoff. And so that's really another big point for entrepreneurs

is don't worry if you're at level, if you feel like you're at level A, keep on working. Do small bites. It does not have to be something huge, but do small steps all the time. And then you will start to see things start to blossom. And dots will start connecting. And things that didn't make sense before

all of a sudden make sense. Hello visionaries, creators, innovators, entrepreneurs and leaders of all types. Hi, my name is John Miles and I wanted to welcome you to this episode of the Passion Start Podcast where it is my job to interview high achievers from all walks of life and unlock their secrets and lessons to become a passion star. The purpose of our show is to serve you the listener. By giving you lessons, tools, and activities that you can use to achieve a passion-driven life, now let the journey begin. Today we have a great episode for you with Madura Verity, and she and I talk about a ton of entrepreneurial topics today and go into how do you stop self-stabbitizing your life, birth three keys for living her own life and

the success triangle that she coaches entrepreneurs on. We discuss vibrational energy and how that vibrational energy makes such an impact. And either you having a positive outcome or a negative one. We also talk about what it means to live a pinball life and go over the B-interital effect. But before I go into her background, I wanted to read a quote from her. Madora says, when you get up being ground in the dirt, you're more likely to grow.

And it's that quote that we used as the basis for today's interview. And she'll talk to you more about how through COVID-19 she had to stop her event business, start her new business so that she's now focused on, and so much more. Let me tell you a little bit more about Midori. As a mindset coach, TV show host, and seasoned entrepreneur for 25 years, Madura Verity assists ambitious professionals who unlock their potential by replacing their subconscious mental barriers. Her clients go from being stuck and overwhelmed to enjoying soaring levels of success. Medore is the CEO and co-founder of Fuel to Fire Entrepreneur Group. Focus on helping members achieve massive goals using the entrepreneur's success triangle. This approach implements accountability systems in coaching.

We may have seen Medori on CBS, Fox News, and Friday, global. And I'm so excited today for you to hear this amazing woman and her thoughts today on mindset and so much more. Now, let's get on with the show. I am so excited today to have Medori Variety with me on the show. Madori, thank you so much for joining us and for being here on PassionStrap.

Thank you for having me. I'm excited for the conversation that we're going to have. Well, I am too, and I'm going to start this out a little bit different than I have in previous episodes. I know COVID-19 has impacted so many businesses, and I have a personal friend who would go to these major conferences and conventions, and his whole multi-million dollar business was helping vendors set up their booths so that they could have the best experience possible. And when events started to get canceled, his multi-million dollar business

evaporated in actually just a couple of weeks. And your quote that I gave at the beginning of this episode meant so much to me when I heard about his story because he actually had to climb out of the dirt or hole that he was in. And he decided to really focus on something new, something that he was passionate about, that he could do as a gap and potentially

as a complete change in his career. And so he went out and got certified in all aspects with the Coast Guard of being a captain where he can now use his, his both that he has and take guests all over Tampa Bay, whether it's fishing or on different tours. And I know for you, you also had an event company that got disrupted. So I thought this was a good lead in for you telling the audience what happened to you and how you had to overcome it. Yeah, and I love that. He went after, you know, he, he had one career that he thought was going to be,

you know, what it, what it was. But then when this, he got knocked out from the knees, he was able to look at his passion and go after that because that's always going to be the right direction when you can align your passion and your drives and what you love. So I love that that's always going to be the right direction when you can align your passion and your drives and what you love. So I love that that's what he did. For me, similar, my husband and I have a number of businesses and the one that is our largest company is an events company and our client tell is Silicon Valley. And what happened overnight is we thought that we were going to have the best year ever. We were already on a trajectory. We could see

the numbers we had events planned. It was going to be a great year until it wasn't. And you know, overnight, when we all got shut down in Silicon Valley, changed the way that they were doing business and they weren't getting together either. All of a sudden we were giving back tens of thousands of dollars. And from that point, we had, you know, we didn't, at that point, PPP was not brought up. We had, from our perspective, we thought, oh my gosh, we need to come up with something really fast. Otherwise, we are going to be in big fat trouble.

And so luckily, I've had so much work, or I've done so much work in mindset and in core values that I was able to look for opportunities. And what I decided was we're going to start a company that is based on the need of what's going on right now. My desire to help entrepreneurs, what I was seeing is there's so many, there were so many entrepreneurs that were hit with what was going on, that they were freezing and they were scared and they didn't know what to do and there's so much fear involved that they couldn't see opportunities. And so one thing that I wanted to do was go from working one to one and go into one to many

so that I could serve way more clients entrepreneurs but add an affordable rate. And so that's where I just started thinking, okay, what can I do? What can I do? And I ended up partnering with a woman named Erin Joy who is, I've respected her for so long, and she's an award-winning, this is consultant,

and she's helped amazing companies grow and sell and do all kinds of things, but she and I partnered, because one thing that I've become very clear on is what I'm really good at, what I call my zone of genius, you know, so what zone of geniuses is, what are you naturally good at, and I call my zone of genius, you know, what, so what zone of genius is, what are you naturally good at, and what do you scale that from your experiences,

and what do you love to do? So that's your zone of genius. So I know that really well. I also know what I really stink at, and what I stink at is organization and details. She's brilliant, Erin's brilliant at that. So we came together, we discussed what we felt entrepreneurs needed the most to be successful and to pivot and change and get to this only level and do it consistently. And so that's

when we created Fuel the Fire that rose out of this whole pandemic. And I'll tell you I love it. It's on fire right now. We're doing really, really well. We're going to be a lot of entrepreneurs into the program and we're seeing big shifts with these entrepreneurs. But basically what it came down to was finding a need, finding the opportunities, and being an alignment with three values of my own, which is my passion,

what drives me, that goes along with passion, my zone of genius, and what makes me tick. So those things needed to be an alignment, and that's what we've done. Yes, I like that idea of that concept of the triangle, And I happened to be listening to podcasts. I listened to them all the time. It's one of my favorite things. But I, two of my favorite hosts are actually Tom Billy, you, and Lewis Hous.

And a few weeks ago, Lewis Hous actually had Tom on his show. It took me a long time to get through, because it was actually almost 200 minutes of content. Wow. So it took me multiple walks, but I listened to a whole whole thing. But I do have to say there was something I heard Tom say on there that I disagreed with them on when I heard it. And I did a whole episode of the podcast not too long ago where I did it on my six secrets defining your passion. And in there, one of the things that I said, and it's similar in lines to what you just brought up, is that oftentimes we let beliefs get on our way. And so I tell people to focus on their values

versus their beliefs. And what taught my interest when I heard Tom talk about this is he was talking about a belief cycle and how he felt it was more important than values. So I kind of just wanted to take this opportunity since you brought it up to maybe you and I have a conversation about this. How do you see values as being different from beliefs? And then I'll go into it after you. Yeah, no, I love this topic. Okay. So beliefs. I will tell you this right now, John, so many of my clients, when I'm just doing the one-on-one consulting come to me because

their beliefs are sabotaging them. Their beliefs, when we, so many people have beliefs such as, I don't have enough knowledge to do this or the other thing. I'm not smart enough, I'm not tall enough, I'm too old, I'm too young, right? So these are all beliefs. Often, you know, it could be from most of the beliefs that we have are from when we're younger. And what happens is as we get older, the beliefs that we developed from our younger age no longer serve us. So I agree with you that beliefs can take us down the wrong path. Whereas values, that's something true to your core, right?

If you have a value, you know, core value, that's something that makes your heart sing, that's something that we protect. If you think about the arguments that you get in with your significant other, you have a big, big argument or with a close friend, that helps identify your core values. And we protect that with everything that we have. And so, John, yes, I absolutely agree with you, that if you can focus on your core values versus just your beliefs, you're going to serve yourself a lot more.

But yeah, I wanna hear what you have to say about it too. It's something that you said is a fact is your beliefs kind of start with who your parents are, with zip code you come from, you know, what social economic environment you've been brought into. And what I find the problem with beliefs is they are what society is telling you. They're what your friends are telling you. They're what your friends are telling you. They're what you hear on social media. They're what you heard from those groups of people when you were at a young age.

And they can be so self-limiting. Whereas as you said, values are something that's completely ingrained in your DNA. For me, one of my biggest values is ski or be skied. It's one of my favorite sayings because, you know, it's so true. And that's why whether it's mindset, fixed perceptions, or whatever they are, one of the biggest things that anyone can do and why I disagreed with Tom is because if you have those self limiting beliefs, you've got to get that narrative out of your head, they're that innate promise that you're making to yourself. And as long as you stick to those, you can start changing those beliefs, changing the influences and activities and people who are giving them to you and start focusing on rechanging those

beliefs through your values. So that's how I kind of look at it. Absolutely, I completely agree with you. Yeah, when you have the wrong beliefs or beliefs that don't serve you, your behavior supports that, right? And so then your results support that. So if you have an unhealthy belief, you're going to stay stuck in this unhealthy cycle, getting the results that you don't want. But if it's true to your values,

then you're going to be serving as such a deeper part of you. That's more in alignment with who you want to be, the type of world that you want to have. And so then those results start building up yourself confidence. They help you feel like you're stepping into the right person and doing the right thing. And it starts building more of a positive result. So I agree. I think that that's an incredibly valuable concept to remember when you're making your big decision when we're going through a 2020, right? And we have to pivot or even big decisions in our in our lives, whether it's with relationships,

whether it's in our career, whatever it is, if he can say true to your values, it's going to take you down the right path. On that same line, why do you think people struggle so much with having an narrative with themselves? Because I see this all the time, people get so consumed with their busy lives that the one person they don't end up talking to is themselves. And it's plagued so many people from reaching their goals. What do you think that's such a struggle? From when we're because what happens is as we've talked about a second ago,

is that we carry these beliefs and these thoughts and what we believe to be true from one more young. So we don't question it because we believe it's true, right? So if you had a teacher that told you you weren't good in math, or if you had a coach that said, you know, you're really not, you're really non-asslate because maybe you had a bad day, or they had a bad day, or you had some issues from parents, it stays with us because we're so formidable when we're young, and we believe that. And sometimes even the beliefs from when we're younger, we're there to protect us. If we stay quiet, we won't get in trouble, right?

So then we hide our voice. If we stay small, then no one's going to notice us and we won't embarrass ourselves. So we create this world, this kind of this fake world that we stay in. And as long as we stay within these boundaries, we're safe from ridicule, we're safe from from failure, all of that. And so that's what happens. There's a book uh by Don Miguel Ruiz called the Four Pillars. Have you heard of that, John? I have. Yeah, and it's just a really simple book, but that's what he outlines is that all of us have these rules, these beliefs that keep us, that can keep us stuck.

I mean, if as long as we play by these rules, we stay in this little box, we're safe from that keep us, that can keep us stuck. I mean, if as long as we play by these rules, we stay in this little box, we're safe from this better, the other thing. But what happens is for those who probably are listening to this podcast, is that they want something much bigger, right? So, but in order to get that, you have to go outside of your box. And that's scary. That's stretchy.

That's pushing out of your comfort zone. And so, either you can choose to stay in that box and not push yourself in the longer you do that, the more yourself confidence is going to go down, often at least to depression. And it's just not a happy place to be. But once you start pushing yourself out, it's scary, but then it gets easier and easier, and you start seeing positive results, and you start feeling more confidence,

and you start getting reinforced. Sometimes you might be knocked down, but then if you can get back up, it's like building a muscle. You learn to do it again. And so that's one thing that I think is so powerful, is if you can remember that, if you're noticing, you know what, I really want this up here,

but I'm feeling fearful here and I'm feeling stuck here. What can I do to help myself get up to this level or go do this thing? What steps can I take? And when you can identify that type of behavior, that type of attitude, that type of belief, that type of belief like you mentioned, John, then you can start addressing it and changing it. Even writing it down, I'm feeling scared to do X, Y, or Z because I'm afraid of failure.

I'm afraid that someone will ridicule me, whatever it is. And when you write it down, you see it. It just makes it easier to deal with. And then you can come up with your action steps on how to change it. And that's really powerful. Yeah, you know, I find that so much today, instead of having that self-narrative,

we end up going out and asking friends, colleagues, others for permission to do what we want to do with our lives. And it's completely backwards because, you know, a lot of times those people may not know what your true qualities are because I think we oftentimes suppress qualities because of who we're around. And often, we don't let those most vulnerable aspects of who we are come across because we're afraid of what others may see if we let them. And I think so many people live, when I call these portfolio

lives or portfolio careers, where they're doing things that they think society is expecting of them or giving them permission to do instead of really looking inside themselves on what they want to do and having that self-dialogue which comes from those values, etc. You know, I will tell you and maybe it's the same with the company you guys have started. If I was listening to everyone around me and had stuff out, you know, seeked out everyone's opinion, I would have never started

passion struck because most people would have told me I was crazy to even go down this path of doing it and had I listened to them, which I didn't, you know, I went instead of asking people if I should do it, I asked the question in a little bit different way of what do you think are some of the biggest inhibitors today that are causing people not to have success. And I started listening to what are those obstacles, stuff points, etc, that are keeping people where they are not pursuing their dreams. And so I kind of threw that back into testing the points I wanted to do with passion struck, instead of telling people, now I'm gonna develop a company where I'm gonna help millions around the world

make passion go viral. Most people would have said, you're absolutely out of your mind and this thing is never gonna work. But I kind of took it at, there are some huge societal issues right now that are going on and negativity and people stuck with apathy and difference,

showmanship are getting so much in the way of living this life that they could have. And I think that that's something we both share in common is we're trying to help, you know, whether it be an entrepreneur or, you know, a future leader or a current leader change their direction and use those four pillars to explore life in a different way. Can you tell me, you know, some stories using that as a backdrop of how you're helping people through what you're doing and some of the changes that you're seeing and

results that are coming about from it. There's a client that we have right now and feel the fire. And she was that she's in the nonprofit world. And right before COVID hit, well, so she and five other people had joined together to start their own nonprofit and help well, I don't know exactly what their goal was, but they were in the events business and they had a deal with the United Nations to do a $300,000 event that happened to be in April of 2020. And so they had just started, that was kind of their, that was gonna launch them and that disappeared.

And so as Erin actually dealt with this particular woman, and as she discussed what was going on and what was happening in their organization, it became clear from an outsider's expert experience that it was time for a change for her because she started to do things that were sabotaging the business because she needed to survive. And so at that point, Erin told us she said, you know, you really need to just be honest, be transparent. You need to dissolve this organization. You need to go talk to your other partners.

And it's time for you to go off on your own and start over, throw in the towel, start over, and then you're going to thrive. So that was a big shift for her. That was a big deal because she was in charge of that boat, right? She was a lead on that organization. and she had to go back and say, look guys, we didn't expect this to happen. But now we, it's, it has failed and it's time for us to move on on our separate ways. So what it did was a couple of things.

When it stopped the sinking ship, you know, I'm sure John, you've seen, I heard this one. It's from Brian Tracy. He said, don't throw good money after bad money. And that stuck with me. And that was very true. That's what they were doing. And so now what she's been able to do is to go down a new path and start her own thing

where now she's starting to see traction. And she can see the future. And she's not being held back by this baggage that isn't working anymore. So that's one big story that where we've seen a big transformation. Going back a little bit, I had a client that I worked with. She was a very, very successful district DA in Silicon Valley and we were talking about story. So I'm going to bring this one up. successful district DA in Silicon Valley. And we were talking about stories. So I'm going to bring this one up.

She had been raised by a mother who was an alcoholic and a drug addict. And she told me stories of having to go pick her mom up from jail to bail her out. This, my client had to get a taxi this before Uber. Go, I don't know how she got the money, but somehow she got the money to bail her mom out of jail and bring her home. Many times she had to help her mom up to bed.

I mean, she was the caretaker out from a young, young age at this mom who couldn't take care of herself. Fast forward, she ended up marrying a man, was married to him for 23 years. He was a very successful judge at a young age. And what was happening was he was a nurse assessed. But what happens for a lot of people is that they wanna be cared for. And this is again, going back to that narrative

that we start from when we're younger. She needed someone to take care of her. That was the story that she had, right? Because she did. From a young age, she needed someone to take care of her. That was the story that she had, right? Because she did. From a young age, she needed someone to be there to take care of her. So she found this man who wasn't the healthiest for her and she didn't have a voice at that point because it was safer for her to play small. And so anyway, there were married for 23 years. She said they did not have one argument, but she was extremely unhappy. So finally, she divorced him. She ended up in another bad narcissistic relationship. And at that point, she's around 48 years. So 48 years of this pattern, of this story,

of this narrative, and she didn't see it. So by the time she came to me, she's like, me, Dory, I'm so unhappy. My kids are having a hard time. I don't know what to do. And basically, what I told her is, if you go back to this gentleman, we're not going to work together. And that was kind of that where she ran into a wall where she said, wow, that was eye opening, just that, that point. But then we worked on creating this awareness for her. So she could see the pattern. So she could understand it and recognize it every time it popped up to see the type of person that she is gravitating towards and how it wasn't serving her so that she could create a new story that served her much better. It's been about six months since we worked together. And we only did a 90 day sprint together.

And now she's with a gentleman who is just delightful. They get together with all the kids. They go on vacation. She is happy. She is living this holy life. And she's feeling fulfilled and happy. And so that's the power that we can have once we recognize the beliefs that we have that aren't serving us anymore and learning the steps on how to

change it. But the first step always is awareness. So those are a couple of stories. Well, thank you for that. And you know, ironically, one of the biggest groups of people that I have been helping out are professional athletes. And I had a really good friend who had played 12 seasons in the NFL and unfortunately he passed away not too long ago, but he taught me the number of things about professional athletes, but specifically in the NFL, most players never hit three years. And there are many reasons for that.

But the typical span of them playing is two or three years. And so he told me, you know, when he was in this rookie season, he was smart enough to realize he might not make it another year or so. And so he started going out and trying to meet as many business contacts as he could, because he did not understand business, knew that his career in the NFL was going to be a short period of his overall life, and he didn't know when it was going to end. So he started out and trying to learn new things, every opportunity that he got. And so when he was about six, seven years in the league, he ended up forming a company that was doing investment into real estate, restaurants, and other things that

was starting to parallel his own income. But what I learned from our many discussions was there are so many athletes out there who don't have a plan B. And many of them come out and they've set up a charity or a nonprofit organization of some sort, but out of that, don't know how to manage their money. Our passionate, passionate lists outside of what got them to that point, which has been this career. And so many of the things that we're talking about or what I try to help them with is how

do you start thinking about your life. You know, you can still use being a professional athlete as a foundational aspect, but yes, you're going to absolutely have to start changing and you're going to have to start changing beliefs about yourself just as we talked about and that narrative and your mindset because things are going to change. And those players who've been very successful at making that leap have done just that, is they use their professional career kind of as foundational point, but they realize and they do the work that they're going to have to do those changes to take them to the next level and to unlock

their greatness as they step into their next phase. So as you work with your clients and as you've mentored, you know, hundreds of entrepreneurs over the years, do you see certain patterns that keep coming back and back? It really is rather simple from what I see is that it's that storyline, right? They get into these patterns and they're like, I don't know why I can't create a successful business. I don't know why I can't get to seven figures. I've been trying, I've been working so hard, and they are.

They're working super hard, they're super busy, but they're focusing on the wrong things and they're self-sabotaging themselves. And they're not aware of it, right? Because I mean, I know so many entrepreneurs who are always saying, gosh, I'm so busy. I have no time for anything. And so they don't have time to get clear on what's really going on and to recognize the patterns because they're just so busy being busy. That's one huge thing that I see for entrepreneurs. And what happens is when we don't give ourselves enough grace to take a step back and to breathe and to really get a good perspective of what is going on and to create a new awareness. We'll stay stuck in that pattern because that habit of being busy is simply a habit, right? And that stops our brain.

I see this a lot also with people who have some mental trauma from childhood or, you know, not that there's a correlation, but it's just kind of this pattern. And as long as you're saying busy, you don't have to really face a step that scares you because you don't have time. And so that's one thing that I see with the entrepreneurs is that they're focusing on the wrong things and they're not taking the steps to really zone in on what's going to change their patterns and help them get to that next level. So once, you know, when we start working together, that's why the mindset part is so important. And recognizing the behaviors, recognizing the beliefs, and then working to reprogram

that and having accountability, element, incorporated in so that when you start going something happens and you start retraining back to your old patterns because that's what we all do, you have that accountability element involved with your path so that you stay on this new blueprint, this new map that you've created so that it becomes that becomes your new habit. And then you start seeing success. And then you start seeing change. And it happens over time. And then it becomes easier. And then this new reality becomes something

that you can actually see and feel and it starts happening. So that's a common pattern that I see with entrepreneurs. Well, it's interesting you bring all of this up because two days ago I recorded my solo episode for next week and it's on the concept of stop living a pinball life. And for me, growing up, lots of people have favorite arcade games that they play. For me, I always love pinball. And for me, the game of pinball is very much like the game of life, in that there are so many distractions

that the game creators throw at you, whether it's the lights, the noise, the bumpers, the ever-changing, you know, ramps that seem to come out of nowhere, that you can write a figure out the pattern for that make them come alive, but oftentimes you're so consumed with everything around you, you don't understand it. And I thank so many people today get stuck living a pinball life where there's so much of our attention as being caught on all those things around us that appear to be urgent, the noise, the lights, the bumpers, etc. that were missing out on actually how to play the game and perfecting that game. And it made me start thinking about a discussion I was

having with entrepreneur Jim McElvy. And in our discussion, he has worked with literally thousands of entrepreneurs. And as we were talking, he said the thing that he sees most entrepreneurs and, you know, CEOs of companies, creators, visionaries, whatever you want to be, get in their way, is they typically launch and become passionate about something because they have found a problem that's worth solving that someone before them hasn't. And so they get this huge passion, but then as you're describing, and is this pinball life describes, they start losing that focus and they start getting involved with the minutia of things that are around them that are distracting them from focusing on the main thing and keeping that main thing the most important aspect of what they're pursuing and he said that more than anything leads to the demise of so many ideas entrepreneurs and companies it's

letting the game of Ben Pinball play you instead of you learning how to play the game. And I think, you know, your example couldn't be more right if you want to live this purpose driven life, if you want to get out there and achieve, you've got to take control of that game and that starts with getting out of those habits, making the choice that you're going to change and then doing something about it. Unfortunately, I see it even more so today, and I think it has to do with the all digital future that's all around us, and the fact that there's even more distractions that are taking us away from that time

that we could be spending with ourselves. Do you have any advice for someone and that you give them about this topic and how you deal with those external distractions? Yes, yes, yes, yes. And so when you and I were talking a few weeks ago, we talked about this process called OPRs and what it is about is about goal setting. And so the O stands for objectives and the K-Rs stand for key results. And I won't go into too much detail on it, but really what it's about is being super duper clear

on what your big objective is, what your big focus is. And John Doer is the person who has really expanded this whole teaching and this concept of OKRs. But he talks about aspirational goals and he talks about committed goals. But your aspirational goal is that one that's an alignment with your passion and what moves you and what's the mission of your organization. And you want to make sure that you always have that visible for yourself, psychologically, but also physically, and so you always see, okay,

this is my big fat objective that I need to be focusing on. And so that what happens with the K-Rs, those are, that's pretty much your blueprint of how you're going to achieve this big objective, how you're going to reach it. And what I love about the system when you implement it into your business and even into your own life is that it forces you

to stay focused on that big objective so that when these distractions come out of left, right center field, which always happens as an entrepreneur. You can't avoid it, but you have tools in place, you have systems in place to help you stay focused on the end result, and be able to prioritize things so that you aren't getting off track for too long by these distractions. Did you know that Forbes Magazine recently cited that 70% of individuals who do personal development,

masterminds, and one-on-one coaching, benefited from better work performance, increased communication skills, and overall better relationships. And we, at PassionStruck, are obsessed with self-development, coaching, and mentorship. That is why we've created a free resource

to help you unlock your hidden potential. Because people doing great things in business and life are just like you, only they've had a coach along the way. And we've got that covered too. Let us show you the systems and frameworks that we teach, growth-minded individuals, to help them step into their sharp edges, execute on their passion journeys and get predictable results time and time again. Go to passionstruck.com slash coaching right now and let's get igniting. I talked to

it through the lens of a concept that I created called the B and turtle effect because like a turtle similar to your long-term objective, a turtle is very slow moving and they're very deliberate about the path they're taking and where they're trying to go. Whereas a B is very much concerned about the here and now and they're taking their orders from the queen about what they need to accomplish right now in that moment. That's accomplishing the objective for the colony. But it's when you mirror the two of them together.

And one of the best examples of this is Elon Musk. You know, he's got this long term objective of wanting to save humanity from itself. But if he just threw out there, that phrase, and would go talk to people about it, people would say you're absolutely crazy. What the heck are you trying to accomplish? And so along the way,

he's come up with six or seven different companies ideas. I'm sure he's got more that he's using in conjunction to go down that path. But what he is extremely good at is keeping that objective and focus. I don't think he probably talks to his employees about it every day. That SpaceX, he's probably talking about space exploration, you know, Tesla probably the next generation of cars. But I think in his mind, he knows this huge objective that he's driving for, yet he focuses on the daily inputs that need to make that output per. And a good example of this is when NASA decided that it was going to abandon the space shuttle. I was having a conversation with a NASA astronaut named Wendy Lawrence. And I didn't really think about this, but she said when they were doing that and they were

going out to Bids, you were allowed to bid on the fruit, fruit aspect of it and the cargo aspect of it. And Elon Musk was the only person in SpaceX that the onset decided to focus on both, that he was going to develop something that could achieve both missions. And while it might have taken him a little bit longer at the beginning, you now see the fruits of that labor because he kept his daily activities focused on the ability to do both. And that's why they're so farther ahead right now from Bill and some of the other folks is that he's done just what you're saying. He's perfected that long-term strategy of the turtle while he's also doing the daily activities

of the bee and staying on top of those things that have to get done along the way to get there. And it's amazing how often people lose that big goal and they get caught in this minutia of things that they think they need to be doing, but are not really taking them closer to their goal. So if you had to give someone a piece of advice if they're kind of caught in this conundrum, what would you tell them is a good starting point to break themselves free of this habit?

You know, I think what I would say is, what is your big goal? And is it an alignment with, getting back to where we started? Is it in alignment with your core values, your passion, meaning your drives, and your zone of genius? Make sure that is what it is,

because when you can learn to design your entire life, focus on those three things. I call it, what I have my clients do is create a personal mission statement. It's one sentence that aligns those three elements and when you create your business around your personal mission statements so that they're all in alignment, it helps create this North Star. And you know that as long as you stay true to that, it keeps you on the right path. So, you know, with a lot of businesses, I see them focusing on, you know, this, we need a new revenue stream. You don't know what to do, and then they'll go and start something totally different,

that they're not skilled at. And it takes away the focus so that the thing that they should have doubled down on, they aren't paying attention to, and then everything just kind of spread all out and it's not, it's a mess. And their staff doesn't know exactly what to do, but when you can have your big North Star be in alignment with those elements,

it makes it easier to say focused because then you just keep on asking. Is this is my decision going to help us get towards this North Star? Is it aligned with my passion, my mission? And who I am, it just makes it clearer and easier. And when you have that in your back pocket, you always know that everything is driving towards that mission. It makes it a lot easier. So when it comes to big decisions, you know, as a CEO, as a leader, you have to be of, okay, so when I make this decision, is it an alignment with the mission, the personal mission statement and our big objective, or is it not, that makes it a lot easier to make the right choice? Yeah, and what's one thing that you've removed from your life, you know, could be a habit

activity, something else that has made you more productive and how you operate today. Yeah, so we have a number of businesses and we have the one business that we've had for 25 years and I hate that business. I hate that business. Like that's a whole other story. But what I have trained myself to do is to own is to have people in place, luckily we're in a situation where we have staff, but to have people in place that are very good at what they do. And so that they can deal with the elements that I don't want to deal with, so that I can stay in my zone of genius, which is on vision and on marketing and stay there 80% of the time. And so anything that doesn't fall into that category, I either delegate or I really take a long hard look at it to decide, is this something I should be focusing on? And if it is, how much time am I going to allocate towards it? So that's really what I had set up. And it was very intentional.

I have systems in place. I have the right people in place. And I know what my zone of geniuses, and I also am super clear on what is not my zone of genius, what my weaknesses are. And that helps us move forward much, much quicker with a lot less headache. And the other big part isenious what my weaknesses are. And that helps us move forward much, much quicker with a lot less headache. And the other big part is that it saves my brain power.

Because when we're focusing on things that we don't like or not in our zenogenesis, sucks out that brain power. It makes us tired so we don't have the energy to put into the things that really matter like we talked about on staying focused on where we're going.

Well, I think Facebook's a great example of that, where there are things that I think Mark Sucumbruk is very good at. And for him, the daily operations and operational aspects of running the company are not. So he brought in a phenomenal COO to help him do that. And I think if Charles Hamburg wasn't there, they wouldn't have ever achieved the success that they have. And I think it's the mixture of both and knowing what time it is to hire your weakness, something that's serably likely and hurt your brands and others talk about so much is, you know, if you keep doing those things that you're not passionate about, it's not going to cause you to be motivated

by what you're doing. So you're wearing up a good point that you really need to fine tune where you've got the passion, where you've got the drive, where you can can lead and then bring others to help you once you've eliminated those things that are drawing you back and that they can help you overcome and achieve. I think that's a great one. How do you keep your act sharp and what do you recommend for entrepreneurs or leaders out there who might be listening that they should do? or leaders out there who might be listening that they should do. Again, it's focusing on my zone of genius. So the things that I really enjoy is I enjoy being creative I, which comes into the marketing part and I enjoy creating this vision. And so I really just play there. I try to stay there 80% of the time. And as long as I do, one, it keeps me sharp on it, it keeps me aware of it.

But I'm always looking for new education on it. I'm going through a program right now called Zero to, gosh, what does it call? It's by Stephen Kotler, who wrote the book bold with Peter D. Monter's, Zero to Dangerous. Yeah, I mean, they actually wrote three books together, but Stephen Kotler, he's amazing. with Peter D. Mantez. Zero to dangerous. Yeah. And they actually wrote three books together. But Stephen Coler, he's amazing.

He talks about flow. And I'm big on that. Anything with mindset, anything with brain power, neuroscience, and neurobiology. I'm like, I geek out on that because I know that that is really important to creativity and vision and I'm moving forward in that element and in marketing because you need to be creative. And so I'm always looking for podcasts for programs for interesting people that aren't

aligned with that. So that's that is how I keep my my act sharp is is by learning from others because when she start thinking you know it all that's when you start you you're missing out on so much. And so that's that's what I do. Yeah I think that aspect of being a constant learner is one of the most important things that that you can do because especially today where there's so much at our fingertips on the internet or people that you can reach out to, there are always ways that you can learn to be better and do things that you didn't think were humanly possible that you can now achieve. Whether that's figuring out a way to be the best smoke cooker in the world, or whether that's someone who doesn't really

understand marketing, but needs to understand SEO. There's so much content that's out there that being a constant learner can help you to become. Along these lines of entrepreneurs and ones that you've worked with, what are the things that you look at in a good entrepreneur and what are red flags that you find in a potentially entrepreneur who you think may fail? Yeah, you know, before I answer that question, I want to back up on what you're just mentioning because one thing that I have learned through this flow program is that our daily actions, they may feel non-consequential or that they're not really getting you somewhere. And so this is something I see a lot with entrepreneurs is, again, getting they feel so busy

being busy that they miss the point. But when you are really focusing in on developing yourself and back to your question of, you know, what do you do to keep your act sharp, that they missed the point. But when you are really focusing in on developing yourself and back to your question of, what do you do to keep your act sharp? It was little things. I would listen to podcasts every single morning. And when I was getting ready, I would listen to podcasts or if I had to go, I go from Northern California

to Southern California quite a bit on drives. And I would listen. I'd have it all lined up the podcast that I wanted to listen to. And I would decide to have it all lined up the podcast that I wanted to listen to. And I would listen to it. And I'd be so inspired. Or I also make a point of working out. But what I'm saying is these things that you do,

the reading that you do, the setting that you do, doing the research on the internet, it's a compounding effect. And so even though you might not see it in a week, or in two weeks or in a year, if you stick with it, you will start to see a payoff. And so that's really another big point for entrepreneurs is don't worry if you're at level, if you feel like you're at level A, keep on working. Do small bites. It does not have to be something huge, but do small steps all the time and then you will start to see things start to blossom and dots will start connecting and things that didn't make sense before all of a sudden make sense.

Have you noticed that John with people that you work with with yourself? I think that there's this natural rush that people have that they think that they want to achieve all this greatness or this wealth, this success, literally overnight. And what I have learned myself, and what talking to literally hundreds of other leaders has taught me is there's no shortcut to doing the hard work. And for me, when you're doing these constant activities, they always are a signal to me that I need to make changes because the times that I have been most successful in my careers are the times where I literally have spent the least amount of time doing it. And it's because, you know, I had done hard work to reach a point, but after a while, you don't need to work that hard. You need to work smarter. And I think so many people think that by, you know,

having to put 16, 18 hours in a day, doing all this stuff where they're in this constant churn, having to be at all these social things after it. I find that they're really doing themselves a disfavor because they're not oftentimes spending the time that they need to be doing on critical thinking and really strategizing and honing in on the actions that they need to be taken that are getting them closer to this stream

instead of doing them minutiae of activities that are basically keeping them at parallel to where they really want to go. Again, I use this concept. I did a previous podcast episode on it called Visionary Arsonist. You brought it up earlier in the interview as being self-sabotaging. They're basically one and the same. We end up being an arsonist to our own vision because we do so many self-sabotaging activities

that we disrupt the very vision that we're trying to bring about and I've seen this happen so many times whether it's in a corporate environment, an individual entrepreneur where you've got this vision, but because of your own actions of playing the game of pinball back to that and allowing the game to play you instead of you playing the game, we end up burning down all these potential dreams, passions and things that end up not coming to fruition because we don't keep the main thing the focus and doing activities and taking actions and making choices and overcoming fears that truly are focused on solving that problem we were meant to solve.

Totally agree. And you know to that point that you're talking about is it's so important to take a breath and to give yourself some space because that is what's going to move you forward. That's what's going to create the momentum and help you really persevere is being able to take that break so you have a mental, so your brain can just relax a bit and it's not always text. Like you said, a lot of entrepreneurs, we see them running, running, running. But they're doing themselves a disservice when they can back off and they make time,

you know, they schedule it and make time just to go do something totally different. Go walk, go take a walk, go just, go be with friends, go do something that has nothing to do with business. Because then you can come back with your sharp acts and you can get you talked about strategy. You're going to be much more focused. You're going to be much more creative and you're going to be able to really think about the right strategy for your

business that will make a much bigger impact than when you're taxed out and you're just busy being busy. So I think that's that's another way to think about what you're talking about is strategy is huge for business, but if you don't have the energy for it, you're not going to be as effective. And so that's one thing getting back to your last question that I see with entrepreneurs all the time, especially when they're in startup mother so busy, but really we need time to kind of just break away from it because

they're wanting to come back stronger. Yes, and I think the other mistake that entrepreneurs make specific to that question is, I have a concept called the mosquito audit, and I don't think that they audit out those things that are holding them from achieving their dreams enough. Because in order to do this audit, you're having to remove activities, habits, people, influences, really hard things that you oftentimes don't want to have to deal with. Because some of these may be removing friend groups. They may be removing influences such as, you know, it could be a drinking pattern or it could be a drug pattern

that they've come into or it could be the habit of, you know, having, you know, drinks at night instead of taking some nights off where, you know, they might be able to have dinner and then come back and to your point. Think about things with the new lens because they've taken some time off but now still alert. But I think so many fail to do some of that hard work by auditing out those things that have the potential from keeping them from their dreams and then reprioritizing and refocusing on influences, people, activities that will get them closer. So that would be my advice on the same topic. Yeah, I love that. And just kind of being aware you talked about,

you know, friend groups and who you're hanging out with. And negativity, you know, there's certain people, this, you know, this because I've been studying this for so long, I'm hyper aware of personality styles and people's energy, people talk about a lot of times like that, they're around somebody and it just sucks the energy out of them. And often it's about negativity, you know, the people that are focused on politics and bringing up all the negativity with it. And, you know, just this, that are the other thing. And that's our energy.

And so just being aware of that and doing that audit, I have had to cut off certain relationships because that's what was happening as I saw this negativity. And it's like, no, that's, you can feel it. You can feel when you're around someone who has that negative or around them. And in order to really live a fulfilled life like you've talked about, and I think we're talking about paper formats. It's not, we're not just talking about having a business. We're talking about really getting to a level where you are on this vibration,

where everything's in alignment. And it takes a lot of focus, a lot of accountability, and a lot of work to get there. And I feel like if we really dig through what we've already, this whole conversation, that's what it's about. It's not about being the same. It's not just keeping status quo. It's about reaching a certain level of success. And what you're all about, John, and what I'm all about is creating a life and a business through business that is about passion and is about our core values and what drives us and makes us tick and what, you know, where all of that. And so in order to do that and to stay focused on it, you have to really do the things that you've talked about is cut out those that take you off your path

and bring you down. I've got a funny question to ask you on the same line. So what the Albert Einstein, Boker Winfrey and Lindsey Lindsey Von, all have in common. Well, they're all high achievers. They are all high achievers, and they all put quantum mechanics and physics through the use of vibrational energy for their best use. All three of them,

along with countless others, are huge advocates of the law of attraction and how vibrational energy, Albert Einstein, quantum physics impacts your success rates. And if you surround yourself with negativity and those things of vibrational attribute it to negativity, that's what you're going to bring into your life. But if you choose to operate on a different spectrum, one of positivity, you will attract a completely different thing in your life. And so I thought it was pretty uncanny that you brought up vibrational energy. And I actually have that episode coming out tomorrow on the power of vibrational

energy and have a lot of attraction can make or break your career. So thank you for that plug you did that you didn't even know you were doing. You're welcome. Totally inscripted. you didn't even know you were doing. You're welcome. Totally unscripted. For those listeners who are out there who would love to get a hold of you and learn more about your company, what are the best ways for them to go back to them that? Well, the easiest way is just go to medory at fuelthefireverity. I'm everywhere. And it's, yeah, so you can reach me all over the place. LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram. I'm everywhere.

Okay. So the last part of our interview is a short lightning round of questions. I promise I won't be too difficult on you. But if you can kind of come up is a short lightning round of questions. I promise I won't be too difficult on you, but if you can kind of come up with the first thing that comes to your mind. Okay. So in our, when we first started talking, I saw that you lived in Sonoma County, surrounded by lots of wine fields.

What is your favorite lots of wine fields. What is your favorite type of wine? Pinoir. I love a really good Russian river Pinoir. Yeah, me too. Why do Tannins impact people so much? I don't know the science behind it, but I do know that's what gives you a headache.

But yeah, there's something in Tannins that do impact how you feel the next day. But I will tell you, John, there are wineries that make Tannen-free wine and there's some really good ones now. So you can be on the lookout for those if you do get headaches from wine. I think it's an allergy quite frankly is what I've heard is that Tannen's there's an allergy that certain people have to it. Yeah, I find with many cabs anymore, I can't even drink them because of the tanning content. So I'm always looking for those that don't have them in it. So I can try to avoid that.

What relationship for you has made the biggest impact on your success? Oh gosh, I don't know that I can say it's just one, but I will say there was a gentleman that I met, I think I said earlier in this conversation that we have a business that we've had for over 25 years and I hate it. And that's what spurred me to go off on my own and start to become my own entrepreneur, separate my husband. And I went through depression, we're not going to go into that right now, but I did go into a depression and I had, I didn't

know what to do. And I felt stuck in that business. And I went to a convention and I had, I didn't know what to do. And I felt stuck in that business. And I went to a convention where I met this gentleman named Doug Bench, and he taught me about neuroscience. And what it did was it gave me what neuroscience and neuroplasticity taught me is that we all, by ourselves, have the control, we have the power, we have the ability to change the way that our lives are. It's no one else's fault. It's no one else has that control,

but we do through our mindsets and our brain power. And once I learned that, that shifted everything in my world. Every single thing in my world, I became more positive. I started these other businesses. That's where I learned about, you know, how to, how to have a growth mindset and everything else. But I would say that one person, Doug Bench, Doug Bench, who was

a big fat flirt at this convention that I went to, but he was so much fun and he taught me about neuroscience. And that was a pivotal moment for me, probably the most pivotal, pivotal. Yeah. That's amazing. So if you were selected at the space program and they gave you the option that you could pick a mission to the moon or a mission to the Mars,

which one would you pick? Oh my gosh. Well, the funny thing is I get totally motion sickness. So I don't know. But. I would probably pick Mars, just because there's less known about it. And I would want to be part of new discoveries there. Okay. And if you got to Mars and and you had the opportunity granted upon you to establish

one law or a rule for civilization on this new planet, what would you pick? Hmm, I would say kindness that people, that would be that would be part of our mantra is to be kind to win another and help out others as you can. Yes, I am taking an FSU course right now and every single time the class gets together, we have a kindness coach who comes in and gives us a 30-minute presentation on the importance of kindness and how it can bolster your job and it's ironic for those who've gone through PTSD treatment when you take cognitive processing treatment and you get into kind of the final states of empathy and it's the word I'm looking for. But you get to the final chapters of intimacy and empathy emotions, they get you to start doing words of kindness to others every single day and

keeping a log of it. So there's absolutely something about saying something kind to someone else, which makes you appreciate and love yourself more and the attributes that you have. So I'm gonna end on a softball question for you. So it's your last meal that you get to have. What dessert would you pick with it? Oh, simple. That would be a maple old fashioned donut, which I never allow myself to have.

But would I die and I go to heaven, my world's gonna be surrounded with maple old fashioned donuts. I've never had one, but I'm gonna have to try that. We've got a donut here where they take a croissant and they fry it and they turn it into a cronot. And those are pretty darn good as well. I can only imagine. Maybe this would be my heaven to you. We'll see.

Well, you've been such an amazing guest and thank you so much for your words of wisdom and for spending time with us here today on the Passion Start podcast. It was truly a joy to have you. Thank you. I enjoyed our chat and thank you for having me as a guest. Oh, you're very welcome. I so much enjoyed having the Dory on the show today and we talked about so many different topics that we were aligned on and I want to use this outro as a time to talk to you about where you can get some of these. So during our

episode today we talked about some topics that I've done individual shows on along the way. One of these is on the concept of being visionary arsonist and how we self-sabotage our own visions, our own career, our own passions in so many different ways. You're going to want to grab that podcast episode and then we talked about vibrational energy and a recent episode I recorded on the importance of the law of attraction and how using the law of attraction can either take you closer for further weight from your dreams. Because vibrational energy impacts those wanting to help us

or those wanting to push us away. And then we also talked about the internal effect and how you need to have both attributes of the B and focusing on your short-term goal and of the hurdle in that long more audacious goal that you're trying to achieve. And then lastly, we talked about the importance of stop living a pinball life. Another podcast episode I recently recorded. And so many of us today are getting played by the game of pinball, instead of playing the game, and using our focus and abilities to conquer those obstacles of the game throws at us. And I'm so thankful as always for all of you joining in on the show and helping us make passion go viral for millions of underdogs all over the world.

Until next week, remember make a choice, work hard, and step into your sharp edges. Thank you so much for joining us. The purpose of our show is to make passion go viral. And we do that by sharing with you the knowledge and skills that you need to unlock your hidden potential. If you want to hear more, please subscribe to the PassionStrike podcast

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