Passion Struck with John R. Miles - Why Self-Acceptance Is the KEY to Creating Your BEST LIFE with John R. Miles EP 133

Episode Date: May 6, 2022

Why Self-Acceptance is the Key to Creating Your Best Life. Sam Berns's inspirational story and what we can learn from his courageous life. | Brought to you by Masterworks (https://masterworks.io use code passion to start). Self-acceptance entails ultimately valuing all parts of yourself — both the desirable and undesirable. It means you understand your current reality, come to terms with it, and aspire to live your life as best as possible. Self-acceptance is perhaps the most incredible gift you can give to yourself. Thank you Feedspot for selecting the Passion Struck as one of the world's most inspirational podcasts. Self-Acceptance - The Courageous Story of Sam Berns I will be opening your hearts and minds to the need to love and accept yourself for who you are through the inspirational story of Sam Berns. Additionally, I will lay out practical actions you can take to achieve self-acceptance ultimately. Sam Berns was diagnosed with a rare, rapid aging disease when he was 2. Sam lived a short but fulfilling life. Just before his untimely death at the age of 17, he was a junior at Foxboro High School in Foxboro, Massachusetts. He achieved the highest honors and earned percussion section leader in the high school marching band during his time there. He also made the prestigious Eagle Scout in the Boy Scouts of America. He is featured in the Emmy award-winning documentary Life According to Sam, which premiered on HBO on October 21, 2013, 2 days before his 17th birthday. This episode of the Passion Struck Podcast is dedicated to Sam, progeria research, and the inspiring way he lived. Sam Berns Tedx Talk has 48 Million views: https://youtu.be/36m1o-tM05g SPONSOR: This episode of Passion Struck with John R. Miles is brought to you by Masterworks. 66% of Billionaires Collect Art, so Why Aren’t You? Low Minimums, Simple and Exciting. You Can Use Art as an Alternative Investment to Diversify Your Portfolio—blue-Chip Artwork. Go to https://www.masterworks.io/ and use code passion to start. * Our Patreon Page: https://www.patreon.com/passionstruck. Questions that you and your friends or family members can discuss about this episode: What gets in the way of you accepting yourself for who you are? What did you find most inspiring about the story of Sam Berns? How can you apply his story to your life? What would you do if you were in his shoes? What can you learn about accepting yourself from Sam’s story? How is your acceptance of yourself getting in the way of your goals and aspirations? What steps will you stake after hearing today’s episode to change your behavior and choices? Time Stamps 0:00 Announcements and introduction of accepting yourself 4:17 Inspiring story of Sam Berns 7:35 Why do people feel unsatisfied with who they are? 9:38 What are the implications of not accepting yourself 12:28 How can you learn to accept yourself? 16:28 What are the benefits of loving and accepting yourself? 17:07 Letting go of the false image we create of ourselves 19:29 Synthesis and show wrap-up Links on Self-Acceptance * My interview with Astronaut Nicole Stott: https://passionstruck.com/nicole-stott-back-to-earth/  * My interview with former WNBA player Anne O'Neil: https://passionstruck.com/anne-oneil-how-life-is-strategy-by-design/  * My interview with Laurie Singer on Why There is Hope: https://passionstruck.com/laurie-singer-on-why-youre-not-crazy/  * Are you having trouble prioritizing yourself? John discusses the importance of self-love in Episode 104 * John explains why materialism is impacting your success and happiness in episode 96. * Do you know the science of healthy habits? John explores this in-depth in Episode 108. * Suppose you missed our interview with Jen Bricker-Bauer on Everything is Possible. Don't panic! You can catch up by downloading it here. * How do you strengthen your relationship with your best self? Explore episode 110. Find John on the Socials: * Twitter: https://twitter.com/Milesjohnr * Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/johnrmiles.c0m * Medium: https://medium.com/@JohnRMiles ​* Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/john_r_miles * LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/milesjohn/ * Blog: https://passionstruck.com/blog/ * Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/passion_struck_podcast/ * Gear: https://www.zazzle.com/store/passion_struck/ -- John R Miles is a serial entrepreneur and the CEO and founder of Passion Struck. This full-service media company helps people live intentionally by creating best-in-class educational and entertainment content. John is also a prolific public speaker, venture capitalist, and author named to the ComputerWorld Top 100 IT Leaders. John is the host of the Passion Struck Podcast, a show focused on exploring the mindset and philosophy of the world's highest achievers to learn their lessons to living intentionally. Passion Struck aspires to speak to the humanity of people in a way that makes them want to live better, be better and impact. Stay tuned for John's latest project, his upcoming book, which will be published in summer 2022. Learn more about me: https://johnrmiles.com. New to this channel and the passion-struck podcast? Check out our starter packs which are our favorite episodes grouped by topic, to allow you to get a sense of all the podcast has to offer. Go to Spotify or https://passionstruck.com/starter-packs/. Like this? Please join me on my new platform for peak performance, life coaching, self-improvement, intentional living, and personal growth: https://passionstruck.com/ and sign up for our email list.  

coming up next on the PassionStruct podcast. It is extremely difficult to create the right reality if you are not willing to let the false reality go. There are a few more valuable things than you can do for yourself than giving up the fictitious image that you have of your life. And learning to accept your reality yourself and ultimately your life. Welcome to PassionStruct. Hi, I'm your host, John Armiles, and on the show, we decipher the secrets, tips, and guidance of the world's most inspiring people and turn their wisdom into practical advice for you

and those around you. Our mission is to help you unlock the power of intentionality so that you can become the best version of yourself. If you're new to the show, I offer advice and answer listener questions on Fridays. We have long-form interviews, the rest of the week, with guest-ranging from astronauts to authors, CEOs, creators, innovators, scientists, military leaders, visionaries, and athletes. Now, let's go out there and become PassionStruck. Hello everyone and welcome back to Momentum Friday, an episode 133 of PassionStruck.

Recently ranked by FeedSpot as one of the most inspirational podcasts in the world. Thank you to all of you who come back weekly to listen and learn, had to live better, be better, and impact the world. In case you missed it, earlier this week, I had on astronaut Nicole Stott, where we discussed her journey from being an astronaut, an aqua-nott, an artist, and now polar explorer. And I also had on this week former WNBA player, Anne O'Neal, who discusses why life, like basketball, is strategy by design. And in case you missed my solo episode from last Friday, it was on the topic of stop, letting your fears control you.

I also want to tell you about some incredible upcoming interviews that we have next week, including the one and only Brechen Ruben. Brechen is the number one New York Times best-selling author of the Happiness Project. Happier at home, better than before, outer-order, inner-com, and the foretendencies. I am also interviewing Dr. Michelle Seger about her new book, The Joy Choice. How to finally achieve lasting changes in eating and exercise, which the big idea club selected as one of their top 22 books to read in 2022. I also wanted to do a shout out for you and thank you for all your ratings and reviews. I know we and our guests love hearing messages from you and we appreciate it so much when you share

episodes that you love with friends or family members. Now let's talk about today's episode. What if I propose that I could provide you more independence, more joy, more kindness, less fear, improved mental health, a growth mindset, and a renewed sense of self-worth. Would you accept it? What if I told you that all of this is possible, but the path to it involves self acceptance? Self love of the kind where you embrace everything about yourself, all your good attributes, and you're not so good features, and be okay with it all.

Would you be able to do it? Self acceptance entails, ultimately, valuing all parts of yourself, both the desirable and the undesirable. It means you understand your current reality. Come to terms with it and aspire to live your life as best as you possibly can. In today's episode, I will be opening your hearts and minds to the need to love and accept yourself for who you are. And I will offer practical suggestions and actions that you can take to ultimately achieve

self-acceptance. Now, let us start today by checking out the inspirational story of Sam Burns, who despite his physical condition was able to defy the odds and live a fulfilled life. Thank you for choosing PassionStruck and choosing me to be your host and guide on your journey to creating an intentional life. Now, let that journey begin. What's your most important thing? What's your most important thing?

On October 23, 1996, San Burns was born a normal and healthy kid, but at the age of two, he was diagnosed with proguria. This very rare, progressive genetic disorder causes children to age swiftly, usually commencing in the first two years of life, most die from heart disease or a stroke by the age of 13 or 14, although there have been some people who have lived into their 20s. This meant that even as a child, Sam's organs behaved like they were a much older adults, leaving him susceptible to various illnesses and causing him to have a diminutive and fragile

look. However, the amazing thing about Sam was that he learned early on to accept his condition and to live his life at its fullest. During an interview, he was once asked, what is the most important thing that people should know about you? His response was that I have a very happy life. With the many obstacles in his life created by a progeria, he never wanted people to feel bad about him. He was okay with fundamentally not being able to do things he couldn't do, and instead

focused on the ones that he could do. He kept looking forward, believing that a bright future always lay ahead of him, which helped him constantly stay in a forward-thinking state of mind. He did not ignore his condition. He genuinely let himself feel and face the pain, which ultimately allowed him to move past it and into other and greater possibilities. A particular victory was when he desired to join his school's marching band. He was 17 then and only weighed about 50 pounds. Therefore, he couldn't carry a regular-sized snare drum.

However, with the help of an engineer who designed a snare drum apparatus, that weighed only about 6 pounds, it allowed Sam to carry the drum and play. Sam went on to play for the marching band, and not only did that, he ended up becoming the percussion section leader. He also achieved becoming an eagle scout in the Boy Scouts of America. Sam acknowledged that he had to be brave most of the time and that it wasn't always easy for him to deal

with his condition and accept himself. Sometimes he faltered, but he always picked himself up and focused on living his best life with the time that he had remaining on this earth. He is featured in the Emmy award-winning documentary, Life According to Sam, rated amongst 15 documentaries considered for Oscar nominations by the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. Sam Burns died on January 10, 2014 due to complications from his condition, but he made sure that his short time on earth

was meaningful, impactful, and inspiring. From this inspiring story of Sam Burns, we can draw out the following questions. Why are people unsatisfied with who they are? What are the implications of not accepting yourself? How can you learn to accept yourself just as you are? What are the benefits of loving and accepting yourself and a few more? Let's go on as I explore all these topics and provide you detailed explanations for those questions. We will be right back to Passion Struct. Oprah Winfrey, she's living breathing proof of the power of passion running away from home at age 13 starting a media

empire and now worth $2.6 billion. All to say that when she makes a big move you can learn a lot by watching. And after she made $60 million in one fell swoop I did some research on how and my eyes were open to a market out there. That's worth an amazing $1.7 billion. That for the first time, we can all be part of. No Oprah-level billions needed. How? There's a startup that's blowing the whole thing wide open called Masterworks. Powered by passion, like all good startups startups are and eager to change the world. To learn more, go to masterworks.io and use promo code passion. That's masterworks.io. promo code passion. See important regulation A disclosures at masterworks.io.

Slash CD. That's masterworks.io promo code passion. Thank you so much for listening to and supporting the show. All those codes in URL can be difficult to remember. So we put them in one convenient place at passionstruck.com slash deals. Please consider supporting those who support the show and make it possible. Now back to passion struck.

So let's start with why do people feel unsatisfied with who they are? We are born into this world in our own individual circumstances. Those circumstances of our birth are completely outside of our control, with some being much more favorable than others. We also live in a world where certain standards are expected of each person for what society deems to be normal. As a result, people may wish they looked different or were born into other circumstances other than their current realities. Failure to fulfill those standards can cause a person to loathe who they are and also develop low esteem.

Naturally, certain factors affect our perceptions of things like beauty, which can cause some people to be considered less attractive than others. The affected individuals may find it challenging to have a positive body image. Other causative factors cause low self-esteem to be felt in additional ways. For example, discrimination may make the person feel like they wish they were different. People with behavioral or emotional disorders are often bullied or victimized. Persons with congenital or acquired disability often feel less than human. In truth, accepting oneself with those conditions can be very challenging, especially when it

doesn't just affect self-image, but also physical mobility, mental aptitude, as well as everyday functionalities. For example, people without limbs may not be able to handle daily tasks the same way that able-bodied people can. However, I believe hopelessness is another alarming element that is plaguing society. Many people believe that everything they do is meaningless. Therefore, they choose

to live in mediocrity. The reason people stay stuck in mediocrity is entirely because of their choices. Think of it this way. Average choices create average results. As Seth Gooden points out, is there a difference between average and mediocre? Not so much. So what are the implications of not accepting yourself? A lack of self acceptance can lead to so many adverse effects on the affected person. Let's go over a few. The first is falling into the comparison trap.

When we allow ourselves to fall into the comparison trap, we are constantly allow ourselves to fall into the comparison trap, we are constantly comparing ourselves to others and what we perceive society expects from us. It's impression for the sake of acceptance, power for the sake of authority, subjugation for the sake of dominance. It leads to nihilism and the lack of hope that there's anything that we can do to improve our lives. It can become an irrational sense of despair, which is a major cause in the 80-year escalation of depression and anxiety in young people and a 20-year hike in adults. The second thing it can cause is bitterness. Because one isn't satisfied with who they are,

they fail to acknowledge and value the good things in their life that they have. This leads to constant disappointment and frustration with oneself. The third thing it can cause is poor relationships. When you are unable to accept yourself, it becomes difficult for you to believe that anyone else can genuinely accept you because you feel unworthy of being loved and valued. It leads to tremendous issues with friendships and in romantic relationships. The fourth thing it can cause is a decline in overall health.

Research shows that our body and mind are directly connected. Our physical bodies are directly influenced by our thoughts and beliefs. So if you are constantly putting yourself down, it can also cause a weakening of your immune system, which ultimately causes you to get infections, inflammation, and other things, leading to poor health overall. There is also a correlation between low self-esteem and the abuse of drugs and alcohol. Fifth, it can also lead to living an unfulfilled life. Failure to accept yourself as you are will ultimately result in having a life

that is void of death or fulfillment. You will simply lack the will and passion for meaningful living and will be unable to do the essential things you can and contribute positively to the world. In extreme cases, it may even lead to self-hatred and eventual hatred for others, leading to destructive behavior and crime,

even worse, it could lead to suicide. Do you have a topic like today's that you would like to see us cover? You can reach us at Momentum Friday at PassionStruct.com. Keep your emails concise. Use a descriptive subject line. That keeps things easy for us. Reach out to us if there's a topic you're interested in learning about. There's something that maybe you're going through, any big decision that you're wrestling with, or perhaps you just want a new perspective on work, love, or life. Whatever's got you staying up at night, hit us up at Momentum Friday at PassionStruck.com. We're here to help and we keep

every email anonymous now, back to Passion Struck. So this begs the question, how can you learn to accept yourself? The journey to loving and accepting yourself all begins and ends with mindset. You have to come to the realization that nothing else matters outside of what you choose to believe and ultimately think about yourself.

And you need to constantly remember that you always have a choice that you can make for yourself in all these daily microelements of your life. The following are some other practical steps that you can take. Be honest with yourself. Self acceptance begins with being genuine and sincere with how you feel about yourself. Except that you are not perfect, and that you are flawed just like everybody else's. This will help you come to terms with the reality and guide your way to accepting your whole self

in order to live your best life. Practice daily positive affirmations. The idea of positive affirmations has existed for a very long time. Repeating positive affirmations is a idea of positive affirmations has existed for a very long time. Repeating positive affirmations is a self-help technique intended to challenge negative, unavailing thoughts, and to promote self-confidence. There is ample scientific research demonstrating that positive affirmations can be highly effective and helping you strive to live your best life. For instance, a study published in the journal,

Social Cognitive and Effective Neuroscience, use the MRI to demonstrate that practicing positive affirmations actually triggers the reward systems in your brain. It releases your neural pathways and changes the brain areas that make you happy and cheerful. You can put positive affirmations on sticky notes, post them on your mirror,

save them to your phone's notes app, or simply remember them and recite them when you're feeling down. When we use the words, I am beautiful, I am blessed, and I am a gift to the world. We begin to see them manifest. Appreciate your unique abilities. Like Sam, who is okay with the things

that he couldn't control and focused on the ones that he could, you must learn to celebrate and appreciate those gifts that make you uniquely you. This will help you get comfortable with your perceived flaws and allow you to grow, to love and accept who you really are. Ultimately enabling you to effectively utilize your ability to create a rich and meaningful life, work on yourself. Accepting yourself does not mean

excusing or tolerating core decisions or settling for the bare minimum. We can all get better in our little ways. So take an active role in improving yourself. I exercising to keep your body healthy and in shape, reading books to keep your mind active, and participating in activities that can boost your confidence and improve your overall wellbeing.

Be content. Contentment is being satisfied with who you are, the attributes that you possess while hoping for the better. Stop comparing yourself to others who you think are better off than you comparing yourself to others who you think are better off than you, or even people who you think you are better than. Focus on your own life and run your own race.

Only by doing this, can you truly see yourself for who you really are and ultimately live your best life. Forgive yourself. There will be times when you will feel weak and unhappy about your situation, which may be triggered by a new feel weak and unhappy about your situation, which may be triggered by a new difficulty. A mean comment by someone, or a result of possibly overthinking your situation.

Regardless of what it is, when this happens, you must be quick to forgive yourself. Get right back up and retrain your focus on loving yourself and do it unconditionally. It is the only way to keep moving forward on your journey to complete self acceptance. Keep healthy and supportive company. The company you keep has a significant bearing on your overall state of being. So ensure you surround yourself with people that build you up who love and accept you for who you are and constantly encourage you through the difficult times with that we all face. This will go a long way with strengthening and helping you to always aim for your best.

So what are the benefits of you loving and accepting yourself? Learning to love and accept yourself unconditionally offers many benefits that make living wholesome, impactful, and fulfilling. You will be able to receive love and acceptance from others. Your health will improve for the better. You will enjoy peace of mind and more happiness, and your self-worth and esteem levels will significantly increase leading to healthier relationships. You will be able to consistently make better life choices in all the areas that matter. Overall, you will be able to consistently make better life choices in all the areas that matter. Overall, you will be able to live passionately, intentionally, and purposefully. Brunei Brown said, because true belonging only happens when we present our authentic imperfect

selves to the world, our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self acceptance. In the same light, it is extremely difficult to create the right reality if you are not willing to let the false reality go. There are a few more valuable things than you can do for yourself, than giving up the fictitious image that you have of your life.

And learning to accept your reality, yourself and ultimately your life. learning to accept your reality, yourself, and ultimately your life. The first step in enhancing it is acknowledging it for what it is. Today, we live in a world where people go to great lengths to alter their lives to meet some projected and often unrealistic societal standards. One of the most vital gifts that we can give ourselves is forgiveness. To live is to make mistakes. It is inevitable. But once you see yourself making a mistake,

forgive yourself and say, I am grateful. I am worthy. I make mistakes, but I will learn from them. Make sure you firstly love and accept yourself for exactly who you are, for it is only then that you will be able to feel deep and lasting confidence and fulfillment. It is easier for some to accept themselves than others, because of the varying degrees of their predicaments and natural propensity towards societal acceptance. However, you have to understand that your life is uniquely yours. No one in the history of the world is you. And until the world comes to an end, there will never, ever be anyone else exactly like you. Remember, we only have one life to live, and we only get the opportunity to live

at once. So accept the life that you have been given and realize how your unique story can change through self-acceptance and you can go out and positively impact others in the world. Finally, I will leave you with words of notable fashion designer Juan Thu Nguyen who said everything begins with accepting oneself. Without self-acceptance, one cannot accomplish anything. I wish you strength and grace in your journey and learning to love, believe and accept yourself for all your strengths and your flaws. Thank you so much for taking the time to listen to today's episode and I hope my words today brought you inspiration and give you something to think about as you contemplate the way that you perceive yourself and the way that you want your life to be. I covered a couple of my past episode topics in this episode if you want to go back and review them.

Just last week I did one on facing your fears and why it's so important to unlearn them. I will also put in the show notes some episodes I did on self-love, overcoming hopelessness and loneliness. And if you're new to the show or you would just like to introduce this to a friend or family member, we now have episode stutter packs both on our website and on Spotify. These are collections of your favorite episodes that give any new listener a great way to get acquainted to everything that we do here on this show. Just go to passionstruck.com slash starter packs to get started.

Thank you for helping us make this incredible passion-struck movement, bro. Thank you for all your support and encouragement along the way. We truly are blessed to have you part of our community and we would love hearing from you. Now go out there yourself and live life passion struck. Thank you so much for joining us. The purpose of our show is to make

passion go viral. And we do that by sharing with you the knowledge and skills that you need to unlock your hidden potential. If you want to hear more, please subscribe to the passion strike podcast If you want to hear more, please subscribe to the PassionStruct Podcast on Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher or wherever you listen to your podcast ad. And if you absolutely love this episode, we'd appreciate a five-star rating on iTunes and you sharing it with three of your most group-minded friends so they can post it as well to their social accounts and help us grow our PassionStruct community. If you'd like to learn more about the show and our mission, you can go to passionstruck.com where you can sign up for our newsletter, look at our tools, and also download the show

notes for today's episode. Additionally, you can listen to us every Tuesday and Friday for even more inspiring content. And remember, make a choice, work hard, and step into your sharp edges. Thank you again for joining us. you