Perfect Day with Jessica Knappett - EP 52: Cat Cohen

Episode Date: July 10, 2025

Comedian Cat Cohen joins Jess on the podcast this week to talk us through her perfect day. The pair discuss the downfalls of podcasting,  horoscopes, noisy massages, the perks of being next to a mountain and chronic oversharing. Perfect Day is going LIVE - come and see us in Edinburgh on the 19th August, tickets are available here:   https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/perfect-day-live-with-jessica-knappett-and-endo1000-featuring-special-guest-tickets-1434649307699  Like and subscribe for brand-new episodes every Thursday. Follow us on Instagram @perfectdaycast. A Keep It Light Media ProductionSales and general enquiries: [e-mail]  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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["B-O-F-E-C-T"] Alright then. Hello and welcome to Perfect Day. I'm Jessica Knappett and that's my washing machine in the background. This week I'm talking to New York comic, actress, poet and all-round bougie gal. Girlie? Are we saying girlie? Let's not insult her. It's Kat Cohen! She joins us from her bed in Soho House. Can you imagine? She talks us through her perfect day as if she isn't already having it. Her perfect day includes snow, the sea, steak and martinis. It's a real good one, guys. And plus we talk horoscopes, my chronic oversharing and my husband because of aforementioned chronic oversharing.

Enjoy! This is Kat Cohen's Perfect Day. I see you. I honour you. I hear you. I honor you. Thank you so much for having me. Thank you. And honoring me at the same time. And by honoring me by having me. Thank you so much for being here. You look like you're in a really plush hotel. So I actually am fully in bed and I'm not ashamed. I want everyone listening to know

I'm laying in bed. I hope you don't mind. You should not be ashamed. This is very perfect day. Okay. Thank you for having me. I am in a really cozy hotel. I just got to London. So you don't live in London?

I live in New York. I live in New York. You live in New York? Well, we're very lucky to have you. I'm so lucky to be here. And yeah, I landed literally yesterday and I tried to stay awake for like 24 hours. So I actually think I'm so lucky to be here and yeah, I landed literally yesterday and I tried to stay awake for like 24 hours. So I actually think I'm doing pretty good.

You know, you don't have to stay awake for 24 hours. I was like, what's the quickest way to make sure I sleep a full night? And it was to absolutely put myself through hell. What did you do? To be fair, I mean, yeah, no look at me now, I'm in bed. To be fair, I mean, yeah, I know. To be fair, I couldn't get into my hotel room because I landed at like 5 a.m.

So I was like, I'm just gonna like, stay up. Oh, that's a nightmare. It was really bad and I did have a melt. I actually had a full meltdown in a park because I couldn't find something in my bag and I threw the bag on the ground to empty it out in the park. Oh God. do you know?

But here we are. There's just something so sort of demoralizing and humiliating about not being able to find the thing in your bag. I know, I know. There's no cool way to look for it. Yeah, I had it in, I couldn't find my keys in my bag. Like when, do you know what it is? When the bag goes down on the floor, when the bag goes down on the ground, that is just

such a, it's like the defeat. It's over. I'm putting it down and I'm crouching. Oh God. And you know it's bad luck for your finances to put your bag on the ground. Well, because of the quality of the bag that we're assuming I have. No, Jess, if you're at a restaurant, you can't put your bag on the floor. It's bad luck. Is that why you have the guy that follows you around to hold your bag?

Yeah, exactly. That's what I was talking about earlier. Yeah, before we logged on, I was like, oh, hold on, my guy is holding my bag. He'll be here in a second. So yeah. So, but now I'm in bed. But you, okay, great. I feel good about what's about to happen. I think we might be in, I've got a feeling

we might be in for a bougie day. Oh, we might be rockin' rollin'. That's true. We are definitely in for a bougie day. Oh wait, so just tell me quickly why you're in London. So I'm doing some previews of my Edinburgh show at the Soho Theater. Oh, but actually the reason why I'm here this early

is because I'm going to see Lana Del Rey tonight. Oh, stop it. Yeah, so I've never been to Wembley, so is it gonna be like really chaos to get there and bad? Awful. It's awful getting to Wembley. What does it entail? Well, I would get the tube. I would get the tube to Wembley. I'm going to get the tube, yeah. Just sit yourself down. And wait, and just wait. Just strap in for a couple of hours. Yeah. Where are you going? It's going to be packed with, I'm staying, where am I? By White City, White City House. Are you in Soho House, White City? Yeah, babe.

That's just so cheap. I'm on vacation. Give it to me. That's wonderful. Let me. That's wonderful. Let them. Let them theory. I let them. I let them. Let them. Yeah, let them. Well, what would you call this neighborhood? It is White City, Wood Green, Shepherd's Bush. Yeah, Shepherd's Bush is where one of my besties lives,

which is also why I would, I'm staying here. Right, you wanna be near your bestie. I need it, she can come over and we get some room service and we cuddle up, really cute. I'm on vacation, is what I'm saying. Well, you should, you should and you deserve it. Okay, so we are on the road to previews and then it's Edinburgh.

And you've already had one Smash Edinburgh. How many Edinburgh's have you done? I've been, this will be my fourth time performing there. I went, I did like some work in progress is there. And then last year I went with a show. I'd kind of like already toured around. This is, this is my, this does feel like the second real one where it's like a new show and stuff, you know? Yeah. So last one was the, um, and twist and twist is that is that the name of it? And twist. That was the first one but yes your and twist it was called and twist and you guys need to google it and look it up. Yeah yeah it's on netflix that one right.

Yeah check it out spread the word um but yeah this is a new show so I have lots of work to do on it. My show is called broad Strokes, because it's about when I had a stroke, if you can believe it. When did you have a stroke? 2023, an amazing year. And you're like 30 or something. You look 30. Basically. That doesn't happen to us, does it? That's why it's a show. That's why we had to write a show about it.

Basically, I had this, I didn't know I was born with this congenital heart defect until like two years ago and that's what caused it. It was very dramatic. Whoa. So yeah, I deserve to be at White City House. You okay now, you do. Yeah, it's crazy.

I mean, physically I'm fine, mentally I'm way worse, but who isn't? Yeah. Well, I think it's good to have an illness to just pour all of your focus onto sometimes. Totally, because now I can absorb every moment. Every moment is now life or death, which is awesome. See, I'm seizing every day. That's why I just stay up for 24 hours. That is so crazy. Okay, so do you want to talk more about that or is that we're saving

it for the show? No, God. Save it for the show. Come to the show. You'll see it. You'll love it. Okay, great. You'll live life, love it. Shall we crack on with your perfect day, Kat? Yeah, I'm scared. I'm like, I hope I do this justice. Well, so do I, so do we all. You can't look, do you know what it is?

Do you know what it is? I think it's a lot of pressure. I think that this is the perfect day of Kat Cohen today. Okay, let's take the pressure off. It's just your perfect day today. It's how you feel today. Of course.

Tomorrow it might be different. It's just one, right. And for those not looking at the visuals, I am sobbing, crying in the studio after what she said. She is. Okay. She is, yeah. What's your perfect morning? I have to ask that because we break it up with jingles. Love it. Perfect for a date A-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a- big king-size bed. I put in a room service order. I get, you know, the classics. I'm getting,

I'm getting some poached eggs on toast, sourdough toast. I'm getting maybe a waffle with lots of butter and syrup. I'm getting a big pot of black coffee. I'm getting maybe some watermelon. That's my favorite fruit right now. If you guys haven't tried it, you should definitely check it out. It's really good. You guys will love that. End up coming to my friend's show and try watermelon this summer. It's amazing.

Okay. And then while I'm waiting for the room service, guess who enters? But my boyfriend, because he comes, he doesn't sleep with me, but he's allowed to come have sex with me. And we we isn't that cute. Oh, that's so nice. That's really generous. Can we just pause a second to discuss mountains? Oh, I was hoping you'd ask.

Because what say what what's what's what's the the emotional connection to mountains? Why do you love mountains? Well, I love feeling so small. I love feeling really thin and mountains are so huge. And so to be near a mountain, I'm like, okay, I'm Bella Hadid next to a mountain. And I've always loved nature and I really like cold weather. I like waking up and being like extra cozy. And so mountains give you that.

And I like dry weather because my hair looks really bad in humidity. So I love a dry cold day with some sunshine coming through and we're cozy in the mountains. A US skier. I also like to ski and I like to hike the right amount, which is not that much.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just enough to be like, yeah, I went on a hike this morning and you're not lying. Right. And to get to quickly get to a peak that's like a beautiful view and then either be able to like take a gondola down or be just sort of carried down by like a big burly man. have carried down by like a big burly man. Have you noticed the difference between the use of the word hike in England and America? No, what do people say here? A walk. Okay, so here- Are they calling it a walk and then going up a mountain?

Yeah, no, no, no, no. We say hike if we're going up a mountain. But if you're just, but what I noticed in America, and my husband is American, and I have lots of American friends, they'll say we're going on a hike, and then you're just like going for what I would consider a walk.

That's not because I have high standards of what a walk is, it's just like, you can go for a hike in a park in America. No? I don't. I think that's your husband being wrong. And I don't want to say that because you know he and I go way back. Do you know what they said? And we won't get into that today because I don't want to fight with you. No, you don't. Do you actually?

But when you stole him from me in America. No, you don't know my husband because he does know a lot of people. No, I have no idea. Do you actually? Oh my God. Okay. Okay. Thank God. Because this has happened before. Are you serious? No, you just said he was American so I ran with it. I mean, when we, because when we were living in America and we started our daughter at

nursery school, preschool, you would call it. There was a woman there who was one of the mums and they had dated. Oh my God, that's kind of hot. It's kind of like- The first meeting and I was like, why are you guys being so weird with each other? This is weird. Oh my God. Wait, where do you live? We were living in Echo Park in Los Angeles.

Oh my God. So that, okay, I can now see that someone in Echo Park in Los Angeles. Oh my God. So that, okay, I can now see that someone in LA would be like, this is a hike and then they take you on a really short walk, but scenic, hopefully. Yes. Okay. Okay. Okay. Anyway, we'll, we'll park that one.

Wow. You're literally, you're literally a California girl. Oh yeah. How did it go down? Wow. Wow. You're literally a California girl. Oh yeah. How did it go down? Wow. In London, through a mutual friend,

he was delivered to my door accidentally. I love how convenient. Yeah, it was like room service. The guy who carries my bag brought him. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it kind of was like that. So we're in the mountains, cozy chalet. I'm just, I'm merely a speck.

My boyfriend gets to have sex with that speck. And then after that, he actually, we cuddle for a bit and then he actually gets to, and we eat breakfast together and then he gets to go away. Oh, lucky him. Yeah. So he'll love this. Because then, on my perfect day, I'm having a moment where I'm like,

this never happens, but I'm feeling so creative today and I have amazing ideas. So I have to sit down and write by a fireplace. And I write something so good, I'm like, this is going to change everything. And after the writing session, and I'm sipping coffee, then it is time, it is time then to do something active. So that could be a bit of skiing, that could be a

bit of hiking, but it's going to be, you know, just, I'm saying maybe a two hour thing. So just to go back to the writing, because you are a musician, a poet, and a comedian. Yes, thank you. Thank you for saying that. Does anything else? Do you want to add anything else to the laundry list? Have I missed anything? American speck of dust.

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Yeah, ask for it by name. Okay, so why did you bring me to this circus? Oh, I'm really into lion tamers. You know, with the chair and everything. Ask your doctor for Wachovia by name. Visit wachovia.ca for savings. Exclusions may apply. This episode is brought to you by Dzone.

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No, I think actually it'd be better if I was writing like some really sort of cutting yet hilarious yet devastating essay or something or like something, some, or maybe some poems that really are like, cause this, this, it really is how it works. Some days you're like, I've never had an idea. And some days you're like, okay, I'm literary genius. And it's, and today it's pouring. It's pouring out of my fingertips. Oh, what a feeling.

What are the circumstances? Can you put your finger on what it is? Like, can you recreate those moments for yourself? Like when, when you have those moments where it's pouring out or not maybe not moments, maybe weeks, months. What are the circumstances? Oh, I don't know. I mean, I wish I did know.

I think, obviously if I'm going through something difficult that can help, but also this is such a cheesy annoying answer but I think the more that I'm reading and absorbing and being less like on my phone, I think the more I'm engaging with other things, the more things are coming to me. But I don't know. What do you think? It's so true.

I feel the same way, but I also find it so hard when I'm on a deadline to read, watch. I know that it's the thing that I need to do. I know it's the thing that's gonna be the most creatively inspiring thing to do, but the idea of just sitting down and watching a movie when I've got so much work to do, I just can't. Oh, I mean, movies are impossible to watch and we have to talk about that.

Let's talk about it. They're too long and they're not my phone. And it's time they be my phone and they be short. It's bad, it's bad. But you're in movies. And thank you for saying that, and everyone needs to really know that. I like going to the movie theater, I'll say,

or the cinema, as you might say. We do, yeah you might say. We do, yeah, we do. I like going to the cinema because I'm less likely to get my phone out. Exactly. And you get to eat. You can eat something too. But isn't it strange because I'll happily binge four or five episodes of something in a row, which would amount to a greater length of time than a movie. I know. What did I just, I finally watched a movie recently and my boyfriend and I, we literally were like, we were honestly, we were like, that was, we're so proud of ourselves for

watching that. It's not effed up. That's effed. That's effed. But is this a change in you? Because you're young. It's not effed up. That's effed. That's effed. What was it? But is this a change in you? Because you're young, so did you, is this, have you ever been able to watch a movie?

Yeah, I mean, obviously when I was little, it was like the best thing in the world. And then, you know, life happens when you're busy making other plans. And please quote me on that in the poll for this episode. Yeah, so I used to enjoy them more. And then also, yeah, I don't know. Sometimes you watch something and it reminds you

that someone you know is in it or something and you're like, okay, this is taking me out of the fantasy. Oh, so it's hard to watch movies because you have too many famous friends in movies. Really, really. I mean, Daniel Day-Lewis, Brad Pitt, Julia Roberts. Daniel, you're really taking me out of this. No, I texted them, like, our group chat is crazy. I'm like, you guys, I'm literally trying

to relax, get out of my movies. No, I just really love reality TV is the reason why I don't actually watch a lot of movies is because there's always something to watch with reality. What your reality go-tos? Well. She's putting her hair up. I just, I got to get to work. I am rolling my sleeves up to talk about this. I recently watched Vanderpump Rules from the beginning, which I'd never seen before and

that changed everything. Have you seen it? I haven't. I've heard all about it. You've got I haven't. I've heard all about it. You've got to see it. Get your kids in summer camp. Send them away for a few months so you can have some new time and you need to watch that. Is it going to be creatively fulfilling, do you think? In all honesty, okay, okay, absolute dead serious question. Should I watch more movies this summer, Kat Cohen, or should I watch the whole of Vanderpump rules start to finish?

And I mean that. For what purpose? In hopes of gaining what? Life, you know, life. I, because I could die next week. If you want to experience like pure joy, I would say Vanderbilt rules. If you want to become like more intelligent and interesting,

I would say watch more movies. But if you want to be like so happy every day knowing you have an episode to watch, that's VPR. Do you know what? I know lots of very intelligent people though who love VPR. So I know, but I don't think it makes you that I think you have to either be that before you watch because it's definitely not. I'm not suggesting it's the cause. I'm not suggesting it's definitely not, it definitely didn't. I'm not suggesting, I'm not suggesting it's the cause, I'm not suggesting it's cause and effect. I was an idiot until I watched it and now I'm spitting gold. Perfect, it's the cure for my idiocy.

It just brought me so much joy when other things in life don't always do that. Yes, yes. So fine. Joy. And that is fine. And it's like Mary Oliver always said, "'Joy is not meant to be a crumb.'" And when she wrote that line, she was talking about watching VPR from season one. Right.

Joy is not meant to be a crumb, she said. That's very profound. Yeah, well, I watched a lot of VPR. That's how it came to me. It's meant to be a loaf. It's at least a loaf. It's at least a loaf. It's a bag of croissants.

Unlimited loaves. Right. Where are we? Divine. We are creatively inspired and then we're going to do a two-hour aprox activity. Let's go. I need to be out in nature and I need to be doing something. I know whether or not I want to do it, I know I will be so happy if I get those endorphins

going. So I have to do something physical, but that's not like in a gym, like something fun. So either we're skiing. Do you want to do skiing or hike? that's not like in a gym, like something fun. So, you know, either we're skiings. Do you want to do skiing or hike? Cause I have two different paths. Skiing. Okay, so we do a couple of runs. It's like electric.

The snow is perfect. And then after we do enough runs, that's the best part. We get to go and drink on the mountain and have some buffalo wings. Oh, I some buffalo wings. I love buffalo wings. Me too. They're so good. Are we talking about, I just found out what they're made out of though.

What don't say it. What? Goop and goop and gog. Do you know? Because I was going gonna make buffalo sauce and I was like, is it just like out of a bottle? Oh yeah. Do you know what it is? Butter. It's butter, it's butter. It's by the way.

But guess what's healthy, butter. Yeah, actually. It's not seed oil, is it? Oh God. No. I'm not letting myself learn about that. I have other things going on. I'm not learning about seed oil in is it? No. Oh, God. I'm not letting myself learn about that. I have other things going on. I'm not learning about seed oil in my 30s. I'm not.

I have to build a life. I have to become the person I've always dreamt of, and there's no room for that if I'm Googling seed oils. Do you know what? You don't need to. Thank you. Butter is good. Just all you have to do is avoid all foods manufactured in America and-

I know. You'll be fine. So honestly, don't worry about it. The amount of plastic in my brain is staggering. I have only eaten processed foods for my whole life. Really? Just like when we didn't know they were bad, like growing up it was, you know, whatever, Domino's, McDonald's, packaged deli meats, whatever.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who cares? We're all doing that. We've all got the credit card sized piece of it. I see a post about that every day. I'm like, okay, we get it. The credit card size. It is so gross.

That's so gross. That's so funny. We are drinking and buffalo wings and we're on top of the mountain, snowy. Is it still sunny? So now what's so perfect is that now that we finished the run, it's actually the snow is no longer coming down. The snow stopped right when we got to the mountains so that we could just see and it's really sunny. So that's what happened with the weather. And I don't normally say this, but on top of the mountain, I go for a beer, bro. I go for a beer.

Oh, bro, hi. Atop a mountain, it's going to be a beer. Okay. And buffalo wings, lots of sauce, lots of butter. And after that, guess what's happening? Well, you're a little bit tipsy. You're full. You've got it. Well, you've got to get the old skis off and all of that jazz. You've got to get down on the gondola. I got to get down, skip that part, because that's kind of annoying. We skipped that magic. We snap and we're like, OK, we're actually just home.

Great. And guess what's happening at the chalet? I'm taking a huge bath in a claw foot tub. And then guess what's happening? Someone's coming over to give me a massage. Boyfriend's back or the little handbag guy. Yeah, we're doing couples massage. Although, let me tell you, he's perfect. He's a perfect person. The way he moans during a massage, he should be put in jail. If someone's rubbing his calves, he's like, oh yeah! I'm like, oh God! Oh no.

But he's awesome. You guys check him out. Google him. He's amazing. Who is he? His name is Brian. He's incredible. Okay. You'll love him. How do you know Brian? How did you meet Brian? I copied you and I had a friend introduce us and then he was brought to my door. Okay, great. And how long have you been with Brian? Oh my God, almost six years. Really? Did I cut out? Or were you just completely flabbergasted? Yeah, but that's because you've done stand up. I'm sure you've done like stand up about

being single and stuff. I did. Yeah. So I did lots of that. Well, in my 20, we got together at the end of 2019. So I'd already written that show that then became the Netflix special. So then that was all about like being single and that came out. Yeah. A couple of years ago. So yeah.

Ah, I see. So you had to do, how was it doing material about being single when you had a lovely boyfriend at home? Did it feel weird? It was stupid. And actually I, I regretted. I mean, that also was, it was supposed to, we were supposed to tape it like before the pandemic shout out to her, but yeah.

Then I was trying to like kind of shoehorn him in and it felt, I was like, now I should have now I hopefully will just always be telling the truth, but in that case, I wish I had just like pretended that I was an old version of me for the taping. Yeah. It was kind of weird. You were telling a past truth. Yeah, it felt like it. When you're telling an old joke and you're like,

I'm gonna blow my brains out if I have to say these words again. But we love it. Can't get enough. Oh, okay. So Brian's back. We're having a massage. Hopefully Brian's not being too noisy. Yeah. He's being quiet. And we're going for at least 90 minutes and they're getting their elbows in there.

Okay. What do you think about that? I'm pretty okay with it, I think. You know, it depends. I don't always want elbows actually. Okay. Sometimes I just, sometimes I want to fall asleep and I'm not going to fall asleep if there are elbows, Kat. Totally.

And nothing but respect and light towards you. Yeah. But don't tickle me and do a sort of light touch thing. Are you in your home, by the way? I love this, the backsplash. Do you actually? Thank you. I'm in my basement. I've been, yeah. It looks like you're in like a beautiful farmhouse. Well, thank you. Well, I'm in the North of England in my, I am in my nice house.

I am in my nice house. It is a nice house. Oh, you live in a real house. Yeah, I know. Wow, that's amazing. Thanks, yeah. Oh my God, are you happy? I'm an adult woman.

I'm married and I'm married and I have two children and I have a house. Sometimes I can't believe it. How do you do it all? How do you do it all? Girl. I do everything very badly. I don't think that's true. I feel like I'm failing at all of it.

No, seriously. Really? Do you actually feel that way? I feel like a bad wife, like a bad parent. I'm bad at all of my jobs and I have too many jobs also. Well having too many jobs is a good thing when you're a performer. Yeah. Yeah. Say that. Oh that does sound good when you say it like that. What I mean is- I have too many jobs. I'm an actor by too many jobs.

I mean that I don't do very well at being, I mean, you must know what this is like. Am I an actor or a podcaster or a writer or a comedian or, do you ever feel like this, like, because you're an actor and a musician and a comedian, do you sometimes feel like being a comedian? Holding her at gunpoint, making her say all those things. Yeah. Do you ever feel like one weakens the other? The only thing I think, which is funny because we both have podcasts, the only thing is that

when I do my podcast, I'm like, is this like discrediting everything I've built? I really feel like that. I really feel like that. But it's fun. It's so much funnier when I distill all the best bits and just have 30 seconds to say them on a TV show. Totally. But I can't stop.

I've been doing my soap for so long with my best friend and we have so much fun doing it. So I'm like, and also I'm so grateful for it because that is, I feel like the majority of people who come to my shows or whatever are like, oh, it's because I like the podcast. I'm like, okay, so chicken or the egg, I wouldn't have anything. So I gave it up. We would be nowhere without podcasts. How long have you been doing it?

We started in 2018. Wow. It's not good. It's, it's not good. You mean the podcast is not good? No, sometimes it's not. No, it is good. I just mean like, it's not, we, we. Pat, who's my co-host, we always joke

that like when we record an episode, like everyone close to us suffers. Because we're just like talking about. I completely relate to this. So, Gohan, what were you gonna say? What was the example? No, just because especially when we were first starting and we were dating around and we were like,

we were just like saying all our most disgusting, horrific secrets and we still do that in some ways and I'm like, why are we like hurting everyone we love to podcast? Yeah, I'm like definitely hurting myself. It becomes and also like this podcast isn't even me chatting with with like a friend, the same friend every week. Like so you hate you hate me. I'm not even chatting with a friend, the same friend every week. So you hate me. I'm not even chatting with a friend. I'm chatting with this random bitch. I mean, and the same friend every week. There's absolutely no need for me to be so confessional.

And yeah, last week just talked about how the hair on, and I'm doing it again, the hair on my legs grows at different speeds in different areas of my leg. Because I used to shave the ankle of my ankle part. And it's just like, that's gross. People who know me have been messaging me about it. Why do I need- What, you actually don't think that's gross?

And I wanna know more about it. Okay, thanks. But we won't do it again. We won't cover the old, but I guess what I'm saying is, I'll go back in this. I suffer. Sometimes I'll talk. I mean, I've stopped talking so much about my husband now, but then I found out that she doesn't really listen anyway, so it's fine. I do sometimes I'll occasionally get a message from my friend saying like from a friend saying am I the friend who? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I just say no.

Of course. I got a text that was like you guys mentioned this person and how he was dating someone but actually a friend of mine has been sleeping with him like what's going on with him and I'm like I have no idea what you're talking about. There's no way I can answer it. I'm sure I was wrong if I said something on the podcast. And love and light. So, but it's fun. We laugh. It's good. It's good to laugh. But you have this amazing format where you're getting like, it's such a fun thing to play. It's so like, you're getting in there.

Yeah, we're getting in there. Speaking of the format. Go ahead. Shall we? Shall we move back onto the format? We were at Mass Nodge. I think we were, are we rounding off the morning? Are we moving into the afternoon?

I would love to move on. Okay, let's move on. She just wants to move on. I think in a good way. When does fast grocery delivery through Instacart matter most? When your famous grainy mustard potato salad isn't so famous without the grainy mustard.

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Okay, go on. Okay, cat. What's your perfect afternoon? Okay, I know what I want. I know what I want. I want to be on a boat. I want to be on a yacht. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I want to be on a yacht. A super yacht? What kind of yacht are we talking? Bezos? I don't want to be on that. I don't want to be part of that. It doesn't matter the size, but I want to be in the middle of, oh gosh, I don't know, the Mediterranean Sea.

Are you trying to think of a sea? I'm like Greece. I'm like, Greece, where are we swimming in Greece? I want to be in Greece. Great. In the Mediterranean, I want to be, so we're on the yacht and it's just so, it's so fun and it's so funny because we're just, we're jumping in, we're splish splatting, we're snorkeling, we're seeing beautiful creatures,

we're snorkeling and then after that we lay, we get some sun and they're making, they're making, you know, pina coladas. We're having pina coladas. We're having like gorgeous sort of grilled meats and dips and there's, there's chips and there's pita and there's, you know, Greek salad and there's halloumi. You know, it's not great. It's not, I'm not asking for much. It's simple. No, no, no. You're just asking that the staff put together a sensational buffet while you, Sanjeev, relax

on the yacht. Have you watched below that? I actually haven't. It's like one of the things I haven't, but I've heard it's amazing. She's putting her hair up again. Sorry, sorry. I got this really silky scrunchie and it keeps just slipping out of my hair because my hair is so fucking soft. Oh, my life is so fucking hard. I need to go to the

toilet. It's wonderful. I don't recall it coming out. I was shocked that you were putting your hair up again because I don't recall seeing you take it down. But now I understand. It slips. It slips. It just sort of, you know, I wake up in the morning and it's just like sitting on my pillow like, ooh. That sounds like heaven. Have you had this experience, Kat?

Because it was very vivid. No, so I will say that I once, I once was invited on a, I guess it was a yacht. It was like a small, not a yacht, what's like a small boat? Like there's still sort of- A catamaran? No, is it a catamaran? It's not a cat, it was like in between that. And it was very nice. And there were people like making snacks and drinks. And we went, this was in Mexico. And we went and I was

like, I understand boat culture and I have to do this again. Yes, I will boat again. It was really fabulous. And then I have also been, I have been to Greece, but I haven't had a yacht experience in Greece. So that's what I'm manifesting via this podcast. I think that sounds absolutely perfect. I'm there, I'm there with you. I would love you. You're definitely invited. Bring the fam.

Thank you. Because then, you know what? No. The issue is with the beach, there's sand. With the yacht, there's crystal clear waters. Yes, there is. You understand. And is it, how are we getting into the water? Because some of those boats have little slides, don't they?

Oh my God, that would be such a good idea. I would love, you know what I used to, is this so funny, at summer camp, I used to be like, I would brag that I was so fast on the slide and then I'm like, it's because I was the heaviest of all my friends. Like it wasn't a brag that I'm like the chunky one. I was like, I'm faster than everyone on the slide. And everyone's like crickets. They're like, good for you girl. I'm like, wow. I'm just barreling down there, flying off. Um, but I really love roller coasters and such.

That was like the most important thing was to be the fastest. I mean, I know obviously for some people it is still important. Exactly. For AG. But that's how, I feel like that's how it should be. For athletes and such. Yeah. But being fast down a slide is better than being thin, isn't it?

And what I mean is I think that should still be the most valued asset. Yes. 100%. And then you become a teenage girl and it flips and all of a sudden you're like, I'm the slowest on the slide. Yeah. It's great, isn't it? It's great to be a woman. It rocks and it rolls. Yeah. So where are we? We're on the boat. And I would love to be reading. That's a whole afternoon.

Yes, oh she's reading. It definitely is a whole afternoon. Well, I think, you know, it alternates between swimming, sunning, reading, eating, drinking. So that's the afternoon. And what I'm reading is, it's the perfect mix of Paige Turner while still feeling quite heady and I'm quite like impressed with myself that I'm reading it, but I'm like enjoying

it. I can't imagine how much I'm enjoying something so sort of high brow. So have you been reading something recently that falls into this category? I read this amazing book. I actually want to shout it out because it's very funny. It's called Paradise Logic by Sophie Kemp. And it's so good. And if you love to read, if you love to laugh, if you love to be moved. That's awesome. Okay. So it is a social afternoon, but you're painting a picture where I'm seeing that it's sociable

enough you're in good enough company to know that you can just slope off and read your book. Yeah, I actually would love to be with my family and a couple of close friends. I'm really close with them. Your parents, do you have siblings? My parents and my two brothers and like, you know, whoever they're dating and like, maybe some of my close friends who know my family,

like we have a group, maybe we have a group of maybe like, you know, 12. Are you the youngest? What's your position in the siblings? So why did you say that? Cause I'm actually the oldest. And do I seem like I'm a baby or something? No, I actually- and do I seem like I'm a baby or something?

No, I actually- Just because I'm not the fastest on the slide. I'll be absolutely honest with you. I had you pegged as a middle child. As soon as you said two siblings, I was like, she's no, but she's in the middle, but because she's a girl, it's all good, baby. That's what I thought. I was like, she's got balance vibe. I've got one older brother, yeah. Oh, I should have said one, but I should have made you guess. So are you really close to your brothers?

Yeah, they're the best. And I love my parents so much. Really? Isn't that crazy? No, this is wonderful to hear. I don't take it for granted. I know it's rare. Do you feel like you don't need anyone else really

and anyone else is a bonus? Yeah. And I also feel like, well, I like when my boyfriend comes with us because he's like basically in the fam at this point. But I do feel it's a weird pressure to be like, if I have a family, how could it be as good as ours? But it will be because they've shown it, they've modeled it. But they didn't have like this weird job that

makes you want to jump off cliff and also be happy because it's awesome. I know. Did you always want kids? I did, but I keep thinking about how like my mum worked, but she's also like, my parents have mum worked, but she's also like, my parents have always given me this sort of sense of stability inadvertently just by like being in the same house in the same place all the time. Oh, that's nice. Do you live near them now or where are they? Yeah, I live near them now. So like if I ever needed to go back to base after like, because needed to go back to base after like, cause this, this career is so weird and disorientating. And I just could always go back to base. And that is- Yeah. Was it hard being in LA?

Yeah. Yeah. So you are, let's go back, let's go back to your, I guess we've, I guess that is the afternoon, isn't it? That's the afternoon. If I were to add one thing on the afternoon, once the boat docks, we're going to do a little bit of tipsy shopping. Sorry, I'm done. That's great, great, great. Tipsy clothes shopping. Yeah, and you're just like, God, this looks, you're like, this is awesome and I'm just

going to buy it. Fuck it. I'm buying it. Oh my God. I, yeah, I, I really, really know that feeling. So many things, so many things that I've boldly bought, but I actually don't, I don't have purchases that I regret from tipsy shopping. I'm actually quite grateful that I... There's a couple of things that I bought on holidays from like French boutiques. Love. When I just got a little bit carried away and just thought I was a different person.

Of course. But actually you bring a little bit... But then it's tied to a fond memory. Yes, exactly. Better than going to Zara. Exactly. I have this jacket that every time I put it on, I just am like, I'm back there with my friends. That's fabulous.

I'm in the south of France. So what are we buying on our tipsy shop? Oh, I don't know. The main things I like to buy are coats and boots because I think they instantly transform a look. I like really loud, fun over the top things. You wear a lot of sequins and your style is very glamorous, isn't it? I love it. I love the glamour. I'm looking at my thumbnail now, I'm like, so I am wearing a black sweater and a ponytail and I'm in bed, but I'm very glamorous. You have no idea.

You have no idea. This is why we wait for the stage version. Yes. You know, that's what they're paying for. Totally. Okay, Kat, let's move on to your perfect night. What's your perfect night, please? Perfect night. This is interesting because maybe you, I feel torn.

My first gut was like, I wanna do a great show. Like I wanna perform. And I think that is my answer. And I think, but it's perfect because like I don't have to deal with the stress of the day before because if you're actually, you know what I'm saying? You don't have any nerves, you don't have like, yeah.

I don't mind nerves but usually like the day of a show I'm just like in bed like freaking out so we've skipped that part and yeah, I just slay, I get ready, I like, you know, here's what I want. I do my own makeup but someone else does my hair. That's what I like. Your beautiful soft hair. Because it's too soft. Someone else needs to do it. I'm falling.

I slay the show. It's a blast. And then a nice dinner, white tablecloths, martinis, steak. Great friends. Bless. New York, obviously. We're back in New York. Thank you for saying that. We're back in New York City at this point. Yeah, we're at, you know, we were at like Monkey Bar or somewhere fab or, yeah. Maybe we go to the Carlisle for like more martinis and jazz and we're just out and we're having fun. This is just so cool.

I mean, what a life you're depicting here. This would be quite the life. Just fantastic. So when you said that you're normally in, I just wanna just go back to, you said I'm normally just in bed all day on the day of your show, just freaking out. Is that your pre-show ritual then, just stay in bed and freak out?

Sort of, well, I guess I'm just thinking of Edinburgh where you kind of just like wake up at 2 p.m. and you're just like, I also, it's not about being in bed, it's mostly about just resting my voice, so I don't like to talk to anyone. Yeah I don't like to do anything in the room. So you can't talk, is that, so that because I don't really, I don't know about this. So if you're a professional singer you ideally would not talk all day. Is that like a common

thing? People just don't talk all day. I think so. Really? That would be the goal. I once read that Celine Dion doesn't ever talk until 1pm or something. I don't know where I saw that or if it's true. I think so. I don't know. But yeah, the less you can talk, the better before a show.

And then you do your proper warm-up. So you go from nothing and then you spend time massaging the instrument, getting into it. Yeah, because you've got a lot to do, haven't you? Because you've got to warm up the old vocal chords, but you've also got to get peppy comedically. Is there anything you do to kind of like get your brain moving? No, I just lean on adrenaline for that.

No, I just lean on adrenaline for that. How does your body respond to adrenaline? How do you feel physically and mentally before a gig? Unbelievable. Unbelievable. What about you? What do you mean? Before a gig? Before you go on stage?

I feel so excited. Do you? Well, sorry. Obviously there are shows where I'm dreading this with every fiber of my being. Why? What kind of a show will make you feel dread? Oh gosh. If I'm on tour in some random city I don't want to be in, I don't know anyone in the audience, it's not full, I'm not getting paid anything. I'm like, what? And it's an old material. I'm like, what am I? Why am I doing this? And I'm tired and I want to be like home or you know what I'm saying? So yeah, but if it's-

Yeah, just touring can be bleak. But you kind of, so why do it then? Hey, don't ask questions I've already asked myself. Because I will say usually those nights I always feel surprised or happy after. Because they also give you a sense of loopiness where you're kind of like going off script and just being kind of crazy because you feel like nothing. And then you kind of like make yourself have fun. Yeah. And it's a, and so you get all that relief, but also you find stuff on those nights.

Definitely. Definitely. You're kind of freer and, and I guess the whole point is you're just getting better and better and better at it every time you do a gig. I definitely think that's true. Yeah. For better for worse. every time you do a gig. I definitely think that's true, yeah.

For better, for worse. And how do you balance, how do you cope with the juggle of auditioning and all of that stuff? How do you cram it all in? Oh gosh, I don't know. We just do it. On the podcast, you just do it.

You just do it. I mean, how do you feel? It's just like, every day is different. Are you very organized? Yeah. I'm pretty, I'm pretty type A. Are you? Yeah.

What's your sign? Yeah, Aries. Love so far from- Libra rising. You? Beautiful. And what's your moon? Cancer? Oh, that's sweet. What about you?

I'm a Leo sun, but I have a ton of Virgo in my chart. That's why I said that because it makes you very like organized. I guess or hard on yourself is the less... Perfectionism. Yeah, which is, you know... Yeah, my moon is in cancer in my 10th house, so... That's gorgeous. And what's the 10th house? My body. My body animation. My moon's in my body. My moon's in my body. I love... This is very 30 year old of you. Drag me to hell.

It is though. Like I do think that horoscope. But how old could you possibly be? Because you look about 30. Love you so much. I mean it. And now we are friends. I'm 41.

How does it feel? So we are, I do think we are a different generation, but I'm very into horoscopes. But I feel like I don't mean to patronize, but I genuinely, and it is a massive generalization, but I do think there is a sort of, no, there's just like an overall acceptance that horoscopes just are a thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In the younger generation, whereas like my generation think it's very funny. No, I hear you. I feel you. But do you think that that's true or am I a vibe?

No, I think that's very accurate. That's why I'm laughing because I'm like, yeah, everyone of my friends, it's very like, I mean- But what? But like, where's his moon? Where's it? And everyone knows. Yeah, it is very like, I mean, but what, but like, where's, where's his moon? Where's it? Like, and everyone knows. Yeah, it is very like that. I do have one of my best friends who's like one of the smartest people I know. And she's just like, so it's fake and you guys need to move on. And we're like, stop, stop. It can't be though. The thing is that

the more, the more I pay attention to it, the wilder it is when the things come true that they say are going to come true. I will say, when I mentioned the stroke earlier, when I was going through that and nothing was lining up, I was like, okay, fuck this shit. When you're going through something horrible, I'm just like, okay, so I'm actually over this whole thing. But it's fun, whatever. How long did you go through that?

I mean, honestly, I got lucky that they diagnosed me so quickly because it was only, I would say it was like a six week ordeal. Cause I had the stroke, like two weeks later, I had the surgery and then within like a month, I was back touring. Wow. Yeah, it's amazing.

Doctors are amazing. I love them. I guess you must have had pretty good insurance. I do. It was touch and go for a minute. I did spend some hours on the phone with the nurses trying to figure out if they would cover it, but they did end up covering it. Isn't it crazy like the thing about being about like living in America and like private

healthcare thing, is that something like that can just completely bankrupt you like this random thing. It's horrible. Like it could just ruin your life in so many ways, can't it? Like even, you know, you can go from being like, it's just, yeah, it's something that we don't, you know, it was a real eye-opener to me when we moved to America and a friend of mine witnessed someone getting knocked down in the road by a car and they said, don't call an ambulance. Don't call an ambulance.

Whoa. Because they didn't have insurance. Insurance. And I was like, wow, that is so different to what we have here. But we're very lucky. Yeah. And what's cool about our country is that it's actually only getting worse. So something to look forward to. So I think we've reached the end of your perfect day and perfect night, Cat. It was so fun to do that perfect day with you.

It was a beautiful journey. Thank you so much. Thank you so much for having me on. We do have a bonus question But I think you already answered it within the podcast because we ask people to recommend a piece of perfection And you already recommended that book Yes, and VPR so and we'd be out so we I think that's I think we've got I love it So I'll let you get back to your hotel bed Thank you so much for having me.

It was so lovely to meet you. What a joy. You too. And I hope to meet one day in real life. I'm in Edinburgh for a show for one day only on the 19th of August, but hopefully I'll What's the show you're doing on the 19th? I'm doing a live episode of Perfect Day. I'll see you then.

What a great episode. Thank you so much to Kat, whose show Broad Strokes is on at Soho Theatre this July and at Edinburgh Festival this August. Check it out. And remember, we're in Edinburgh for one night only. Well, it's one day, really. Follow the link in the show notes and buy a ticket and you can come and watch Perfect Day live. I'll be there with Kat, comparing our moon charts, obviously. From Yorkshire with love, I'm Jessica Knappett, wishing you a perfect day. How do you know if you're worrying too much? How can you mend a broken heart? Does peeking at school ruin you for life? I'm Susie Ruffall, a stand-up

comedian and someone who has always experienced anxiety. And I've written a book, Am I Having Fun Now? Considering some of life's big questions. Featuring bonus insights from the likes of Charlene Douglas, Sarah Pascoe, Elizabeth Day and Dolly Auderton. Am I Having Fun Now? Is out now in hardback, ebook and audio.