Picky Boys Podcast - JT Doesn't Believe in Dinosaurs CONFIRMED?!?! - Picky Boys Podcast #324

Episode Date: May 19, 2024

On today's episode, Danny, JT, and Antonio discuss ancient artifacts that are under our house, picking up phone calls when you don't know who's calling, a priest who really likes Candy Crush, living for 3000 years, and genuinely complimenting your friends! Join Patreon for instant access to 100's of extra Picky Boys Videos! - https://www.patreon.com/pickyboys Get Picky Boys Merch! - https://pickyboys-shop.fourthwall.com/ Twitch - https://www.twitch.tv/thepickyboys Make sure to check out all of the guests on today's episode: JT - https://www.instagram.com/thejballs/ Antonio - https://www.instagram.com/antprisco/ Danny - https://www.instagram.com/dannyiswatching/ Picky Boys - https://www.instagram.com/thepickyboys/

that's what i would do too right you throw your poop and pee everywhere i mean if there was no if there was no sewage system what do you do with it okay oh danny was literally danny was the guy literally 30 seconds ago going oh let's not do that let's not do that i'm not gonna call it a berry that's a straw berry a blueberry and bury some poop are you kidding me i guess that movie asks philosophical questions that do not need to be answered yeah yeah it's like you just don't need that i don't want to bring that yeah we don't need all that welcome back to the picky boys podcast welcome welcome welcome what's going on antonio and jt nothing much jason construction from the house again

more more more they're digging it up they might be fossils beneath our house honestly i wouldn't be surprised if they find an ancient civilization on there, and then they aren't allowed to touch it any further for like 10,000 years. Isn't that how it works? Like in Italy, when they're digging the tunnels that as soon as they find an artifact, they're like, oh, can't do it no more. Yeah, no, it's true.

For good reason. Who cares? Well, if you find an old structure, you gotta say, oh, look at this old structure. First of all, if the structure was buried and it went away that long ago, maybe there was a reason. Just leave it down there. Like, I don't care about digging up old stuff. That's true, they didn't fail.

Yeah. We just constantly keep digging up failures. Yeah, true. You didn't make it here. We're still here. Our buildings are still here. What could be in front of the house? Like a rapport card with an F on it?

It's like, I don't care about it. Nothing's here, though. This area used to be swamps. The New York swamplands. Can't a dinosaur kind of drown in a swamp and then something happens underneath the ground? Okay. So there could be a dinosaur. Were there dinosaurs in North America?

Well, it was Bangia. I know the part that is this. Was there dinosaurs? Yeah, definitely. I mean, if it's just one thing, then I guess they're everywhere, right? I hate the way you're speaking to me. I hate the way you're speaking to me. If it's one mass, they're everywhere.

In this area. Forget about Pangea. In this area. There's no certifiable way to know, like, oh, yeah, a dinosaur stepped right outside our door. Well, if there's a dead dinosaur there, there is. Well, of course. According to you, that's not even proof. Wait, what?

Wait, what? You don't believe in fossils? Oh, no, I just, first of all, Danny is completely misrepresenting what I think. I just think that we know fucking fuck all about dinosaurs or any prehistoric shit, and we just find a fossil and assume a whole bunch of shit about it. You know what? Bro, you ever hear a documentary about megalodons? Yeah.

And they're like, oh, and we think that they hunted in this way, and we think that they did this in this way, and we think that this was their behavior and size. You know what they found from megalodons? A tooth? Some teeth. that's it and they're like

oh their behaviors this is how they hunted fuck you you do not know that imagine imagine someone found Danny's teeth and then a thousand years

from now and they're like yep and he liked to play a lot of Fortnite and he liked to do this and that and first of all

they'd be right but secondly how could they know that in this fictitious scenario you made them correct which goes against your point just saying

a lot of people on TikTok called you dumb supposedly supposedly you? I don't care supposedly

the dinosaur science is very advanced the dinosaur community is very large 30 years and take the same exact fossils, they construct it in this way, right? And the dinosaur stands like this

and it moves like this. Then they find a new fossil and they go, oh, forget all of that. Forget it. Forget what we said. Now we think that it looked like this. JT doesn't believe in the scientific method. JT doesn't believe in dinosaurs,

I'm starting to think, actually. I think we just fill in a lot of gaps and we don't actually know the things that we say. Bro, you cannot make a documentary about a single dinosaur and pretend to tell me that you know everything it did. The Megalodon tooth was very big, though.

It was a very big tooth. How do you know it's hunting behaviors from that? Well, you kind of know if it's a canine tooth or a molar or something, don't you? I didn't mean to get him riled up. Yeah, look what you did. I didn't mean to get him riled up. Look what you did. But you know how they also know about Pangea?

Because they'll find, like, oh, there's this dinosaur, this species of dinosaur on the tip of South America. And there's the exact same species, a fossil. In, like, Africa. Yeah, yeah. And they're like, how are these two exact same species so far away? And it's like, oh, they used to be connected. And, you know, it is kind of convenient that if you really do look at the globe, all the pieces where we broke off kind of do look like a big puzzle.

Like, you could just kind of squish together. Yeah, fit together. Let's say, you know, in some degrees of error, I'm sure. Jason, you were looking up. What are you looking up? Dinosaurs. What is it? What did you find?

Oh, I was looking up how they can tell the behavior. Preserve gut contents, eggs, nests, footprints, skin impressions, and even dinosaur poo. Do we have dinosaur poo? Somebody does. Look up megalodon fossils. Because, bro, sharks don't have bones, right? Yeah, sharks can't fossilize.

Well, their teeth can't. So it's just their teeth. Well, you know the picture? Dude, that's a big tooth, dude. All made up, just their teeth. I mean, you could kind of... Bro, that is a big tooth. Just from that, you could...

I'm not saying megalodons aren't real, guys. You're saying you didn't know they're aggressive? I'm saying you don't know their fucking hunting behaviors from that. That's a big tooth, dude. It's a big tooth. No one's disagreeing that there's a big tooth. You can jump to a lot of conclusions. You can jump to many conclusions.

Point is, what would be the most shocking thing, besides a body, that they can find in front of our house under the ground? Probably like a treasure. No, we wouldn't know. They would just take it, those green bastards. Oh, you're saying the most shocking, like we don't get to keep it. It's just like the most shocking. Well, we're not doing it. I mean, it would still be shocking.

Well, what kind of treasure? Like a treasure chest? Imagine if they just found a boat. How did it get here? That would be crazy. See? That's what I'm saying. Something like that.

A plane would be crazier. A plane would be crazier. A plane would be crazier. You know what would be crazy? If they found a plane that predated our planes. Well, now we're getting into something else. Now we're getting into like, you know, who knows what kind of advanced societies existed before ours.

We have nothing cool back in the day here. It was just swamps and wet and smelly. Yeah. Very smelly. But it wasn't any less smelly in the cities back then. It was more smelly in the cities. Yeah, it was more smelly. They would throw their poop and pee everywhere.

True, which I guess that's what I would do too, right? You'd throw your poop and pee everywhere? I mean, if there was no sewage system, what do you do with it? Is that why the stoops were higher? Better in the street than the house. I think I would bury it like a dog. I'd go outside, dig a little hole, poop in there, and then kick some dirt over it. Am I the only one that hated the way he said bury?

Yes. Can you repeat that? I definitely do not like that. Burry? Burry. What the fuck is that? Burry. You don't bury something?

You dig up some dirt and then you bury it. He doesn't speak this way. You don't speak that way. I literally spoke like that. You're from New York. It's burry. And if you do speak that way. That's a fucking food.

That's what it is. If you do speak that way, don't speak in front of me that way. Burry. Is there a third way to say it? I'll meet you in the middle. I don't think so. I'm not going to call it a berry. That's a straw berry, a blueberry, and bury some poop.

Are you kidding me? JT, can you pronounce this word? Inventory. What the hell did that have to do with anything? He was pronouncing it inventory yesterday. Oh, with an E? Inventory. Inventory, yeah.

Inventory. Is that not what you said yesterday? You're completely misremembering this entire conversation. He does that. I was making fun of Jason because he used to say inventory. He used to say inventory. I did not. You just ratted on yourself by accident?

This was less than 24 hours ago. How are you? I literally was making fun of you for saying inventory. When the proper pronunciation is inventory. Inventory sounds like a place where people make gizmos and gadgets. It's an inventory. It's the inventory. You pronounce something else weird.

We were talking about that. I pronounce something else weird. It wasn't this word. What do you pronounce weird? I can't remember. I guess you could also say burry. No, you cannot. I just burried that bag of shit over there.

So there's burry, berry, and burry. Burry and burry. How do you spell burry? Well, now I don't know how I say it. Burry sounds more correct. How do you spell berry? B-U-R-Y. No, it's B-E-R-R-Y.

No, that's strawberry. So you do spell burry, B-U-R-Y. Burry, but I say it burry. So why can't... So how do you say... And fury... This is your champion, by the way. This guy's on your side.

He's trying to convince you it's burry. You can say burry. You got some burry. It's not burry. Listen, I'm not saying what I'm saying is right. It's just the way that I say it, and basically everybody I know says it. It's probably an East Coast thing.

Burry. We're also agreeing with the way you said it sucked. I don't think so. You're just really enunciating. Yeah, that was terrible. Burry. No, you guys are enunciating. I said burry.

Don't like it. It was jarring. All of us looked at each other when you said it. Yeah. Everybody was just, Jason ratted on himself, rat. I'm so close to the word you can't pronounce. I'm just going to say it randomly. It starts with a P.

Philanthropist. I know one word I can't say is vulnerable. Yeah, no, it's that. Vulnerable. Vulnerable? I can't say that word. Vulnerable. Vulnerable.

It's too hard. There's L's in it and V's. What words can you not pronounce? I used to never be able to pronounce soldier. What did you say? Soldier, soldier, soldier. Like that middle fucked up second grade Antonio real bad. When I was a kid, I always used to say aminal instead of animal.

That sucks. Aminal. That sucks. Aminal. Aminal. You're just flipping the letters. It's not even close. I know.

What about synonym versus cinnamon? No. You say both of those? I didn't really say cinnamon very often, I guess. No French toast for you? No, cinnamon made sense to me because of cinnamon from Froot Loops. Yes. That's really how you learn how to say it.

Apple Jacks. Yeah, yeah, Apple Jacks. They completely changed. You saw they completely changed those guys? They fucking whitewashed them, honestly. Did they really? They really did. Cinnamon was so cool in Jamaican.

I know. He was great. Oh, my. What the hell are these two things? Oh, that would have been like fucking... That would have been like VeggieTales or some shit. Like, I loved the quirkiness. Wait, wait, wait, wait.

I don't even remember him like that. I remember him with dreads. Am I wrong? You kind of do, too. Dude, I remember him with dreads. Maybe when he took off his hat. Did the old Applejacks guy have dreads, or am I crazy? Oh, okay, okay, okay, okay.

He's just wearing like a hat, like a cover. Gotcha. I thought they Mandela affected us real quick. Yeah, but they really did. I mean, they took everything out of that. First of all, they took away all the personality. Really? It's so much cooler.

Do you like- Apple Jack's not great. I don't like Apple Jack's. Really? I don't like Apple Jack's. All right. Do you like marshmallow cereal? Yeah.

No. I don't- I like Lucky Charms. They're good. I love Trix, too. Trix's not marshmallows. Does it not have marshmallows in it? No, it's Trix are for kids.

They definitely have a version with marshmallows. Yeah, no, but he's right. I'm talking about the Lucky Charms big one. I think they have marshmallow O's probably. But no, I don't like... Golden Grahams? Ever had Golden Grahams? I love Golden Grahams.

But the real problem with marshmallows and especially Lucky Charms is now I'm just like kind of eating through this garbage to get to the good part, which is the marshmallow. And there's not that many. On eBay, they sold bags

of just the Lucky Charm marshmallows. You see, I feel like that's easier to eat as a snack dry than in wet milk. Does that make sense? Yeah. Either way. My family used to get mad at me because I would like

kind of just pick at the at the box and eat all the marshmallows and then they just have a bag of cheerios and at the end that sucks i'm a very segmented eater as you know like i'll eat the fries before i eat a burger and it has to be separate when i ate lucky charms i would literally like go through the pain of eating all of the shit cereal like just the grain and then at the end i'd have a final bowl of marshmallows and it would be like a reward for getting through the shit it says a lot it says a lot about it does i don't know why i'm such a picky eater like that i must have had those uh you know those like compartmentalized trays that kids used to eat on what do you mean you must have used to have did you have them what does that mean sometimes i

think about how i don't really remember like my childhood very much there are a lot of times you don't remember 10 minutes i know but i'm saying like i remember like for some reason i feel like i remember the memories i don't feel like i remember the actual events you know what i mean no we've we've come through a lot of uh checkpoints where you have a lot of feelings about things for sure i don't know danny felt like he threw a baseball at some point 10 years ago no i definitely did that in like a michaels or something stop doing that michaels that's an art store no the The one, it's right across the street. It's in the...

Models? Sporting Authority, I think. Sports Authority. I think it's Dicks now. Oh, Dicks. Yeah, now it's Dicks. But it used to be Models or Sports... I don't know.

It doesn't matter. My point is there's a lot of feelings going on inside that man. I have a question. If you get a phone call and you don't know the number, do you pick it up? I've been getting about, not even exaggerating, 10 a day and I haven't picked up a single number. Oh! See, because people make a big deal about it. Like, you ever see somebody, like, look and go, like, Martin did this the other day.

He was like, 3-1-4, 3-1-4. That's crazy. Is that Brooklyn? Should I answer or not? It's like, if you don't know who it is, just fucking pick it up and say hello. It's not even that. There's no way thinking about whose number it is is going to help. If it's not in the phone, you don't know who it is.

Like, I feel like there's this weird fear of, like, if you pick up the phone and it's, like, somebody can do something to you. Like, it's just pick it up and answer. If you don't know, go buy, boom, that's it. It really just depends if I did something, if I ordered something or something's going on. If it's just a normal Tuesday and a random number calls me, I'm not picking up. I'm not picking up.

Just not doing it. I pick up everything. Maybe that's bad. I don't know. I don't know. When you're getting like 10 a day and it's all telemarketers and shit, I think I got to go tell people to stop selling my data. But you get numb to it.

Yeah, you got to get your name off a list or something. and I have a fair share of telemarketers too but like I don't know I feel like are you rude like do you

after you hear it's telemarketers you just hang up or are you like no thank you I'm good I just hang up they're all fake anyway it's all robots

I don't know maybe yeah so that means they're all collecting all those times you were rude and when they take over like this guy was a dick to me when I tried to call his house

and if it's a real person I just say no can't not right now I'm in the middle of something call me back that's so many words I'll tell them to call you back

but that doesn't stop the problem Yeah, it kicks the can down the road, and then eventually they get the gist. Why not just say, not interested? I mean, it's the same shit. You say, call me back later. It's the same shit. Are they going to mark me down? Oh, this maybe he's interested.

Bro, actually, yes, they will. Absolutely. Yes, absolutely they will. And then they'll call me again, and I'll say, not now. I like to string them along. If they're going to inconvenience me, I'm going to inconvenience them and make them think. And further inconvenience yourself. Yeah, I mean, it's not an inconvenience for me.

It's two seconds. I say, I don't want to talk right now. Call me back. Boom. Stop saying call me back. Also, I'm not talking on a landline phone. I don't know why I keep hanging up like this. You know what I'm going to start doing?

I'm going to be like, oh, no, no, no. I'm busy right now. You could call me back, but at this number. And just give them Danny's number and see how many times it gets called a day. Don't do that, please. And before we get into some news, we are very close to 700 patrons. Very close. I think we're very close.

Less than 20, less than 15. By the time you see this, possibly less than 10. So patreon.com slash piggyboys. You get year plus of extra content, almost 500 posts. And then our moms. Access to our moms. I know. The moms are coming to the house.

I thought I had to sneeze for a second there, I'm going to be honest. You know my mom has never been to this house? She's seen the outside. Yeah, I guess so. More than most moms. My mom actually made a great joke yesterday. She was like, I finally get into the picky boy's house, and all I had to do was create 700 fake accounts.

Dude, my dad, every single time, we're like, oh, yeah, we're at this amount of patients. We're at this. He's like, yeah, I know. I really got the guys working on all the extra emails. So I'm like, congratulations. It would be cool. But no, honestly, if he's willing to put in that work,

I'm fine with it. Yeah. Is there ever going to be a dad's podcast? No, there will not. I don't think so. No, no, there will not. No? No, no, there won't.

Unless, no, there won't. We'll see. After Danny's bear cage, maybe we'll do it. People keep sending me videos of just bear cubes. This is crazy. I can't believe I agreed to that. You did. No, there was a different Danny that day.

Danny would never agree to that. I don't know. Yeah, but now it's binding its contract. Get the clip, send it to him. True. All right, Jason, what do you got for us? All right, so this is a priest from Pennsylvania who spent $41,000 in church funds on mobile games.

He was spending it on Candy Crush, Pokemon Go, and Mario Kart Tour. Mario Kart Tour. Respect. Good use. That's not so bad. $41,000. What level? How bad do you suck at Candy Crush that you need to spend $41,000?

I didn't know that was possible. Well, yeah, Candy Crush, you can only play a certain number of levels a day, and then you run out of tokens and you can buy more. Or what people used to do and someone told this priest is you just set the clock forward on your phone. I think they got away with that. I think they're done with that. Because then

back in 2015, my mom, her phone was set in the year 2030. I'm like, Mom, what are you doing? No adult was more tech savvy than the peak age of Candy Crush. I didn't know my grandmother even knew how to set her date on her phone. Let alone every day.

He's saying that his personal bank card and the parish credit card were linked to his iPhone, and so it was a legitimate mix-up. I don't think that's true. Second question, then. 40,000. This guy is making enough in this church where, leisurely, he could spend

41,000. You know what? I have no idea how much a priest makes. Not a clue. I mean, I know it's not that much. It's not enough to just drop 41,000. How much do you think is a yearly priest's salary? I don't want to say it because I think I'm probably

going to be wrong either way if this guy spent a $41,000 just offering zero idea here either I can take a guess and I would say wait wait wait not yet

not yet not yet guess time out time out I'm not going to press enter it'll show up with a suggestion

TV time out time out time out oh god it's right there okay now priests they're supposed to live this life close to Jesus

or whichever prophet they admire and they're supposed to live you know this life of poverty basically yes but you know

they get housing provided by the church because they sleep there, right? Yes. But Jesus is closer to the sky and it's easier to get up there if you just stack your bills up there. If you sit on a pile of money.

Sit on a pile of money. I mean, at the end of the day, that's another good point. Regardless of their annual income, how much money is a priest spending on his day-to-day? $41,000 on... I'm going to say...

$55,000. Oh my God! That's so high, I think. I think that's so high. I'm going to say that this guy spent a year's worth and it's $41,000. You got to pay them enough

to not, you know... No, wait, I change. You got to pay them enough to not do all the bad priest things, you know? That's not working, so I don't think they're getting paid a lot.

I change, and I'm going to say that they live in the church, they eat in the church, all that gets provided for them, and then they make $20,000 a year as cash. Okay.

Cold, hard cash from the basket. I think it's going to depend, as in, you know, it's going to go Pope, Deacon, Priest, yada, yada, yada. Bishop, a priest, normal priest, they definitely have another job on the side. I'm going to go. They definitely don't have another job on the side.

For sure they have another job on the side. Have you ever seen a priest with another job on the side? Just because he's not in the collar? I don't know. Well, I mean, maybe not a Catholic priest, but definitely. Oh. Lots of teachers are like, oh, yeah, and I do Sunday service. Oh, that's true.

I'm talking specifically about Catholic priests right now. The ones that are really committed to it. Some of them are teachers at fucking high schools and shit. That's true. So I'm going to say. I don't know. Do they get double salary for that? I don't know.

I'll say $35,000. $35,000. And Danny's going $55,000? I will, yeah. That's so high. That's $55,000. $120,000. Everyone's $20,000.

I always forget that other priests are not. Oh, wow. Oh, I crushed that. See, the Catholic priests do get higher. $48,000. $48,000 to $560,000. I didn't read the second part. Yeah.

Oh, my God. Wait, so the average. In New York, Roman Catholic priest, $88,000 to $130,000 per year. Jesus. Well, on ZipRecruiter, it's $24,000 to $63,000. Oh, Roman Catholic. Sorry, cool ones. Who's hiring priests on ZipRecruiter?

Also, the average was $37,000. I said $35,000. Almost nailed that round in the head. And it was up 14% from 2014. You did. You did. $560,000. How much does the Pope make?

Got to ask that, right? Got to go to number one. You can't make more than the Pope. I feel like, does he even make anything or just everything he just is given to him, regardless of what he asks for? Bro, the president makes money. $32,000 per month? Is that what I saw?

Yeah. But he refused to get any of the money. Instead, he donates his monthly salary of, okay, but he has a monthly. Very, very popish of him. Very popish. But he does have a monthly salary, if he didn't donate, of $32,000. And he also, he doesn't need money because he travels, everybody travels for him. He gets whatever food he wants.

Does he get, like, carried wherever he goes? No, no, no. Now it's the Popemobile. Oh, okay. Who decides that? Like, who decided $32,000 a month? Somebody in the church. I don't know.

You think they have so much money, they're like, how much should we give the Pope? I'm like, $32,000 a month should be fine. What does bread cost these days? Yeah, $70,000. What I didn't know is you're supposed to give 10% of your salary to the church. Yeah. I did not know that. Common people, like, if you go to a church.

Suck my ass cheeks. I didn't know that either. And people do it. It's not just the fucking basket. People, you ever see those envelopes? Those envelopes have some fucking fat stacks in them, bruh. And it's all untaxed. Cha-ching, God.

I'm going to refrain from my opinions there, but do what you got to do. Whatever makes you happy. Either way, the Pope's balling. How much is $32,000 a month? So much. Yeah, $400,000 a year or something like that? Yeah, pretty much. I think you're supposed to give 10%

or don't people also say you're supposed to give 10% to charity? Yeah. Kind of that rule of thumb. And it would have gone there if the government wasn't taking 40% of it. And it would go there. Have the government take 20,

the church and donations you get then. At this rate, at this level at least. You know, if you're making 32,000 a month, I get donating to, it gets pampered anyway. That's what I'm saying. It's easy to refuse the money when you get everything anyway.

not saying the pope isn't a good guy seems like a fine are you saying oh now you know you but i mean he could still be taking it he's not i guess oh that's true that's true there are people making way more giving way less to be fair you know what i never knew the old pope quit and i don't i never really looked into that well how do you step down as a pope you'd usually just die it's like a till death do us part type job and the old pope just stepped away i think something's off there Well, yeah, I think it has to do with the whole, you know, Catholic church. Oh, yeah. Boys.

Let's not get too monetized here. I think something's off there. Yeah, it was pretty public. I don't think we're on Patreon. I didn't know. Was it that? That's the. I mean, I don't think there was ever.

He's just guessing. No, I don't think there was ever an official, you know, stepping down letter of reason. But yeah, that was definitely why. I think it's just people also on the flip end could just get old and be like, oh, my brain. It's like, why would you want to, you know. But this new pope is cool. He rides a motorcycle. And I think people like the new pope.

He refused the monthly boy in the salary. Okay. Danny was literally, Danny was the guy literally 30 seconds ago going, oh, let's not do that. Let's not do that. Made the joke of the year. He's a good guy. He said no. That's enough out of you.

Okay, whatever. I have a question back to the 41K. I have a question back to the 41K. Do you think that the brain goes, oh, I'm going to spend this $41,000 on whatever I want? Or the $41,000 spent, you don't realize it, and then you're like, oh, God, I need this money. Take it from the church. Do you think it was take from the church after you fucked up? Or think about it, take from the church, have fun?

I think this was like $2,000 a month over two years or something. And then, yeah. And you don't see the charges on your card? Like, that doesn't make any sense. No, no, no. Oh, I don't think this was an accident. Right. I think that he, like, let's say he spent a thousand the first two weeks and he's waiting for his next paycheck from the church.

And he's like, well, if I'm waiting for my next paycheck from the church, let me just use the card anyway and I'll put the money back. And maybe he did put the money back the first time. And then he just fell into this dark habit of candy crushing and Mario karting. Oh, I didn't realize it was a full 41,000 on the parish funds. I thought it was like it could have been like half and half. Like he ran out of money. No, it's fully 41K. so it was 100k of his own then

and then he ran out and started using the parish funds I think no 41,000 his excuse is that it was his personal card and the parish credit card and it got mixed up so JT is saying that if he spent 41,000 of the parish funds

he must have also spent 41,000 of his own money I think that could also just be an excuse a little white lie a little holy lie A little holy lie. Having a parish credit card is kind of cool, though. It's like, let's put it on the church.

I picture it looking very cool. It has like a cross on it. For sure. A cross on it. I mean, you definitely have to pay the extra money to get, you know, your own design on it. No, you don't. Put it on the card, bro. Yeah.

True. All right. Let's get off the church before Danny ruins it again. What the fuck? Don't what the fuck me. Don't what the fuck me. Oh, please. It's a joke.

You know what I thought about? I was driving, and there was a little gnat in my car, like a little bug. And I was thinking, wow, wherever I park and get out, this thing will never find its home again. True. I was thinking about that. If he leaves the car. If he leaves the car. And I made him leave the car.

I was like, you can't stay here. But I do think... You don't have to go home. You can't stay here. I do think the lifespan of a gnat is like two days. So really, it's just like he lived the second half of his life somewhere else. All right, let's do... midlife crisis in your car.

Yeah, or he wanted to leave his family in the first, because the first hour of his life is like 20 years. He's like, oh, I got to get out of here. And he got in the car.

What about a longer lifespan bug then, like a spider? That's never finding its web again. It's true. It's true. If it has a little nest with little nest.

You know how they say that, how like time, like a gnat, like two days is his whole life, so every hour is like a year or whatever. People also say the opposite

is like if you lived for 3,000 years, then like one month would be like a day. But I don't know if that would really feel like that. Like, do you think you would feel that if you were to live for 3,000 years? Like, time would move faster, almost?

For sure. I think that's how it scientifically works, also. Not to be the bore of the conversation. If you live for 3,000 years, bro, I think that, like, I think the human brain can only hold so much. I think you'd only remember the past couple hundred years. Like, if you think,

you probably couldn't even remember what you were doing, what your job was, or anything 1,500 years ago. How could you remember that? Or there's an argument that because things change so much that you can live that long, maybe you can remember that much. Like, you're just a different, you're not a person anymore, kind of. Also, anybody that lives for 3,000 years, how can you really be a person? That's so much.

Yeah, you can't really care about, like, any, like, personal relationship. If I lived to 3,000 years plus, after the first 200 years, I don't think I'd care about a single person. I watched my family die three times. I don't care about anybody else. Yeah. Every war you see, you'd be like, humans are so silly. They never learn. You see, you just said it right there.

You're not a human in your conversation. In your own inner dialogue, you're like, these peasant humans. History is a cycle. I see what's happening. I've seen so many. I think if Danny lived to 3,000 years, he'd be a full-on menace. You think so? I think so.

Isn't that crazy? One more thing. That he would be watching the Jets lose for 3,000 years. Isn't that crazy? I'd get my time. My time would come. I don't know about that. I think you could also, this is going to sound really terrible, but it's like, similarly to how humans do enjoy, you know, building and maintaining a relationship with a pet and then it dies.

I think that's just how you would start treating your friends and family. That's horrible. And because at the end of the day, like, the facts are the facts. Like, I can still have a fun hundred years with you, but I know you're going to die. And then I'm going to have to move on. I can't, like, waste my life, you know. Now, you can spend the next year. I mean, I'm sorry.

No, no, no. Do what it is. You are, in this scenario, you are completely correct. It's just we're not, I can't live for 3,000 years, so I'm thinking about it in terms of. But it's almost inspiring. The point being is that, like, you can still learn to love and have a fun relationship and a meaningful relationship with something that you will outlive. Right, but there's a very thin line where it comes to something that you don't want to do anymore versus, you know, like you do. And you're like, oh, well, I'm going to live past you anyway, almost like that.

Yeah, well, you never say that. That's the one thing you can't say. That's the unsayable saying. Yeah, yeah. It is true. Can't say that. What I also never understood about that stuff is that all these movies of, you know, vampires or whatever that people live so long, and they get whole new families, and no one goes,

wow, Uncle Bob's been looking the same age for a long time. Do you think, do you think that you have to get so into character that you would have to start spray painting your hair gray and stuff? until everyone's gone. Oh, you're pretending to age? Yeah, until everyone's gone. Like, you know, you whirl around in a wheelchair, but as soon as they're all gone,

you just get up and go play baseball. I think every 10 years, you gotta dump everyone and go find a new identity. That's crazy! You're even shortening it more! Why? For what? Because otherwise they will notice you not aging. I think 10 years, they can be like,

wow, you look great. You look just like you did at 20 when you're 30. And then, you know, but beyond that, people are gonna be like, how does he actually not have a wrinkle? He doesn't have fucking... I think I would say... Saves the death.

I would start getting very good at yeah but that's even sadder cause now you're making their hundred years sad you could do a 20 year period you know the third if you look the same at 40 as you did at 20 the 25 to 45 range

a lot of people look very similar they do and they don't 20 to 40 I think you gotta be 35 you ever see an actor and you go holy shit Like, what the fuck? They look exactly the same.

Yeah, but also, you've never seen that actor wake up in the morning. I swear to God, if you saw them wake up in the morning, you'd go, God, you know? But to say this guy doesn't have his bad morning days, just because he's invincible, doesn't mean... He can live to 3,000 plus, I guess. I don't know. Shorten it down to 10 years is crazy. That's why I even do that to anybody. Just live as a nomad.

Oh, I mean, for sure, you're going to have a period of isolationism. Just like, you know, 100 years, just like in a forest somewhere. yeah that'll happen it's just he might as well there's so many years do you think Keanu Reeves is that guy he could be that guy

for real too well there's there's pictures of like an 18th century guy who's taking a portrait and he looks exactly like Keanu Reeves so it makes you wonder

yeah but why would you make you wonder yeah but why would you bring so much attention and also we could and he's so weird and mystical he's so weird and mystical

that fucking he might be that guy there's a couple there's a couple of them throughout history. That one really looks like Peter Dinklage down there. I don't know. That might just be a painting of him.

Oh, wait, no. Yeah, but he... I mean, I don't know. It's close. People with dwarfism often look similar. They have similar features. Oh, wait. No, that one's just a painting of Keanu Reeves right there.

Oh, yeah, transform yourself into a 57. Even that doesn't kind of even look like him. Oh, that's fun. We should do that. This one looks the most... but it's still a stretch. You know what I was thinking we should do? There's a website, I don't know what it's called,

but where you can find your twin. I don't want to. And you can see who looks exactly like you. And I don't know if it's like on a vote system where people vote up the person who looks like you, but I think it'd be interesting. I think, and I know this is not ideal, but in this 3,000-year situation,

maybe you start at 20 years old, and then you age to 100, and then like a fucking snake shedding its skin, you'd become 20 again. Well, that's ideal. And that's the workaround. How much good do you want from this scenario? Yeah.

That's too good to be true. Also, every time I shed from my cocoon, I also get a million dollars, right? It's like, all right. I mean, I prefer that over the like, what if it was just like a bouncing, it's like you live your life normally, you age, and then you Benjamin Button back,

and then you reverse Benjamin Button, which is really just aging again. You go back down to a fetus. No, you can't go to a fetus. You won't remember anything then from your past life. Well, you still remember all these things. This is magic, JT. I'm sorry.

JT, you idiot. This is magic, of course. No, I feel like that's harder to explain, the Benjamin Button thing. I feel like it's easier just to, can't we just bounce from 20 to 80 and back to 20 and back to 80? Is that real, Benjamin Button? No, Dan. No, of course it's not real. Well, no, and like a disease like that, like obviously it's not like, oh, he's becoming a baby again.

But that's not really what Benjamin Button was either. I mean, he was physically aging in reverse, but mentally, I think he was all still, he was a smart baby, I think. He definitely could not talk. My question. Wait, how was he birthed? I was about to ask that. He was an old man.

How? Was the mom dead? No, no, no, no. He wasn't a fully grown old man. He was an old baby. No, no, no, no, no. He was like a senile, like, rickety old man. That's what he was when he was like three.

Yeah, but how did he pop out? Are you talking about the Brad Pitt movie? Yeah. Yeah. Bro, he, like, pops out. I don't even know if he came from a woman, to be honest. Benjamin Button, one years old. No, no, zero years old.

No, it's... Oh, yeah, that's true. It's zero when you pop out. Benjamin Button birth film. Show the full Benjamin Button being birthed. He was, like, in the fetal position, and he was this wrinkly old man. Oh!

No, he was an old baby. No, this is a fucking... Oh, Benjamin Button liked disease. I told you it was real. No, it's not real, dude. This is not real, Danny. This person was not... No, yeah, see, he was a tiny man.

Look at that Wired That's him No he came out As a tiny little That's what I'm saying Yeah I said He came out

As just an old baby Yeah he came out As an old baby Yeah I guess so Oh look It's the prosthesis It's the prop they used The bottom right

Ew Ew And they can control It's movement I don't think they had To give him a little penis Oh we can buy that Does Heritage Auctions

I don't want to show that On here Danny Wow We're not buying that I mean I don't know What I would do with that Alright so he was birthed

As an old baby Yeah, it's like a baby, but old. And Danny thought that this was real. No, well, I said, is there anything like it? And there obviously is. No, there's not. It's just someone who fucking has some... It's someone who looks old as a baby.

And then, you know, they're not going to get younger. They're not going to get younger. It's like saying Hasbulla is Benjamin Button. Because there's children to age rapidly. Age rapidly, yes. So it's really only the... Yeah, it's Benjamin Button, but just sadder. Oh, Benjamin Button is by F. Scott Fitzgerald?

I didn't know that. I mean, that's why it sucked. Is that Gatsby? Yeah, it's Gatsby guy. That's why that movie sucked. Type in Benjamin Button old. I want to see what he looks like as the baby. He looks like a Brad Pitt, brother.

No, no, old. He means young. Yeah, old young. He wants to see how he dies. Yeah. He dies as a baby. She's holding him in his arms. That's how the movie ends.

Yeah. It gets very dicey. He's literally a baby. It gets dicey because he banged her, and then he becomes a baby, and she's holding him. It's kind of strange, honestly. The movie's very weird. That movie asks philosophical questions that do not need to be answered. Yeah, yeah.

It's like, you just don't need that. I don't want to bring that up. Yeah, we don't need all that. It's just a confusing, confusing mess. But Brad Pitt, when he's 18, 20, that's a smoke show. That's a smoke show in this movie. Careful. Careful.

I said 18, 20. What about when he ages beyond it? Ask her that, not me. I didn't do it. She was holding him as a baby. Look at this. This is new. You like this?

New Antonio. Polo. Congratulations. I like that. Who got it for you? This doesn't feel genuine at all. Yeah, no. I don't like it.

I don't want to give you answers because I feel like I'm being set up for something. Can I fucking just hang out and ask my friends questions? This is like malarkey. No one believes this. whatever's going on well that's on you it was genuine

I'm gonna bounce thank you no you know what you could have said thank you Danny for noticing noticing what you didn't say anything

I said it's new it's nice that's all you said I said it's new and nice it's nice and new no one believes in nice alright I have a question

about that though yeah it looks like a Kanye West album I don't have the answer what is that I have no idea someone got it for me it's just a square drawing

of Mount Everest honestly yeah I like it too notice no one asked about Danny's shirt Some Turks and Caicos. It's nice. Yeah, it's nice.

It's just a... Not new. It's a classic, like, you know, vacation shirt. It's like a tiny little thing on the back and the whole graphic on the back. Where is Turks and Caicos? Are they two separate places? Are they just always together? Fantastic question.

I think it's two countries on one island. You've never been? I think, no. I've never been. So, poser. Yeah, my parents got it for me. They went? Yeah, it's like a souvenir, you know?

That's funny to bring back something like, Hey, I asked about it. Thank me. Let's see Turks and Caicos. Oh, it's beautiful. Is it just one place? I think so. Why does it have any hand in it?

Well, because... You should just be Turcaicos. It's like Johnson and Johnson's. This looks like every... Jason, how about you have some fun? Yeah. That looks beautiful. If you think I wouldn't be there right now,

dead wrong. It does look beautiful. Look at that fucking water. Oh, my God. That's my favorite color. I want to go to Turks. Oh, wait. Look at that.

Yeah, yeah, look right there. That's the Turks. That's the Caicos. I'd like to go to Cockburn Town. Is it the capital? I want to see what they're up to over there. After an afternoon on a naked beach. That could be you.

We are children. All right, I think we can end it here. I think we can end it here before anything else. Big Sand, what does that one say? Big Sand City. Their names are so uncreative. There's a lot of sand here. There's a Big Sand City.

All right. Let's get the hell out of here. All right, let's go to Turks and Caicos. JT, tell them where to find you. You can find me on Instagram at the J-Balls. Danny? You can find me at DannyIsWatching on Instagram. You can find me at AntPrisco.

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