Please Stop Talking - 100 (feat. MandaloreGaming, Brendaniel) | Please Stop Talking

Episode Date: April 18, 2025

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The PSD merch store is back! Show your clownbertarian pride with our Don't Honk On Me stickers and magnets, Revel in the new and classic shirt designs, buy your gam-gam a fucking hat, check it out at pleasestopshopping.com, that's pleasestopshopping.com. And there's also 10% off for a week for any order above $5 so you should try, you should check that out. What do you guys think, you should check that out. What do you guys think? Should we started with the voicemails?

How many are there? We got 158. Oh shit. Oh, we should probably start with them. Yeah. There's that many reasons. No, we're not, we are not doing 158. Okay. Did you preface it before people started submitting

that we might make fun of them? They probably know that we would make fun of them. So no. So that's a no. That's a no then. That's definitely a no. It's fine. I didn't want to do it.

I don't want to do like voicemails all day anyways. Like that's not an interesting episode. I don't know. I watched three and a half hours of voicemails once to bring Garfield back. It was six hours. Was it six? What are you talking about? The sex survey is six hours, man once to bring Garfield back. It was six hours. Was it six? What are you talking about? The sex survey is six hours, man.

The sex survey. Fuck. It was, yeah. The sex survey? Yeah. Crom. My name is Crom and I fuck every day of my life. What?

The Garfield sex survey lasagna cat. The lasagna cat sex survey. You call in and you leave your name and then you leave how many sexual partners you've had. What? That was a thing. It was. And it is a six hour video of guys dressed up as Garfield, Odie, and John answering the door and it's mannequins and they say how many sexual partners they've had and then they close the door and then it's another one. The second biggest fumble of my life is not calling that sex survey line. That's the second biggest fumble of my life. What was the first one? Oh, the scary movie, Two Penises, the first fumble.

That's the big. Yeah, that's the biggest fuck up you've ever done in your goddamn life. It's not even close. Biggest fuck up is that not calling the sex survey. Oh, dude, it's not even close, actually. I'm mad for you. What am I missing? It's not a real penis.

It's not. It's like a prosthetic penis from the movie. Yeah, it's a fake penis. They had it in a jar this entire time to keep it fresh. It's gotta be in a warehouse somewhere. I'm like, I'm keeping my eye out on it. Collecting dust, it's unloved because of you. I have like a prop tracker. I keep an eye on it.

Just like Walt Disney's head, but it's a penis. I don't know how to fucking do this 100 episodes. And I, it's been too fucking many and I'm stupid as shit. Welcome to the podcast. Welcome to the 100th episode. That's the kind of energy we're about here at. Please stop talking, I guess. Fucking seven years and you've never missed a step. I don't think you've ever taken one. Yeah, Billy actually sent me a cake for the 100th episode.

I was going to present the voicemails. I brought it back. We brought back an old segment that was a terrible idea the first time and it's probably going to be a terrible one now. We asked for people to send over their voice clips for us to listen to them talk to us about their... They can just say whatever they want. 10 seconds. Alright, the first voicemail is going to just be, one of you be a gas station attendant, three of you be customers. Go. All right.

Why did you send it in, Brendan? Like, yeah, I said, I said 20 years actually. I want to do that one. Wait, no, I want to do that one. I want to do that one. I kept telling Billy, like, I'm driving a Ford white Bronco and I'm on my way. And Billy kept saying, no, no, stop sending me these.

Okay. So Ms. Sheena, you're the, you're at, you're the gas station attendant and Mike, Mike Mandy and Cameron. You're letting Brendan be the at, you're the gas station attendant and Mike, Mike, and Cameron. You're letting Brendan be the fucking retailer? That's crazy. No, he's going to be the narrator. He's going to narrate this story.

All right. Oh, let's go perilous. Oh yeah. Do you want to do, do you want to do? Oh no. All right. All right. Sheena, you work at a gas station.

Everybody else is customers. I'm going to set the scene. Another day at a humble gas station, slowly but surely the sun crests and rises over the hill. A beautiful morning as a huge car pulls in with a bevy of boys inside. Oh, I'm so freaking hungry. I can't wait to get my Slim Gims. Says Toothy. Why? Why is my name Toothy? Big ass teeth.

His mouth bristling with woe. Should I be whistling? Well I thought... No, I said bristling. His mouth bristling with whoa Every single tooth in his rotten mouth is completely and utterly desiccated He licks his lips and smacks his tongue against the roof of his mouth. He talks normally though, so I don't know why he's doing this. Says Brian Gumbel. What? Oh, sure thing, Brian Gumbel. Thanks.

I walk inside of the- You leave the long Lexus and walk directly inside of the gas station. It's a Lexus but it's long. It's a drop top too. It's no long Lexus. You walk inside of the gas station to the humble gas station employee an employee of the fuel fool says greetings to you. Greetings my name is teethy what the fuck is my name again you're you're you're your legal name is Jim Parsons no relation my name is Jim Parsons but everybody calls me toothy no relation to Jim Parsons where do you keep your mountain gulp red back Back there, but Slurpee machine broken. The manager walks in.

His name is Harrison Ford, no relation. This is the worst. Wow. I go to the Slurpee machine and I press the Slurpee button. And suddenly over the loud speaker, we hear a community question. There's no way. Is this the best? No, this is great.

This is great. Oh, rip it. What's it say? Let her rip. Happy big and round 100. Be he. That's awesome. We got how many of these

and you picked this as one of the 12. We got 154 voice mails and you picked the happy big and round 100. Are you kidding me? One of our finest minds Be nice! What is there to discuss? You know why? Happy big and round Wednesday to

YouTube. You look at this LRB machine and it starts to shake and chutter and suddenly the intercom turns on again Huge congrats on a hundred episodes guys, that's awesome. Thanks again for signing my magic cards at MagFest Julian, I'm sorry for thinking you were black cameron you you you weren't there he didn't recognize julian when we said oh do you want

julian to sign one he was like oh i didn't recognize you i thought you were black Julian assigned one he was like I didn't recognize you I thought you were black he's apologizing for him being white yeah we signed magic cards for that guy with the machine wiggling and stirring in front of me I I put a cup under it panicking and stressing out oh I need to put a cup and instead of slurpy noise erupts okay this one comes right out of the goo hole Holy shit, that machine is broken Did oh you thought it was the machine but actually you turn around and it was the radio on a cop Oh,'s right behind you holding a gun who's the cop Mike's the cop what are you doing here screwing with that their slurping machine there's officer Denison hello mr.

officer I look at his name tag Denison my name is toothy and I'm trying to get a slurpy a red gate Mountain Dew code red big slurp out of the big slurp machine but it seems to be broken. Hey Billy, can you roll a D20 for me real quick? I don't. You need to make a whale save. The cop's gun starts the QTE. I have a D20.

Yeah, roll for Billy. I notice the cover in Billy's hand and I start getting nervous. You notice the glowing blue X button right next to your gun. I rolled a 10. Yeah, you're gonna have to grab the gun. I'm sorry. Wait, I grabbed the gun? You grabbed the glowing blue X button right next to your gun. I rolled a 10. Yeah, you're gonna have to you're gonna have to grab The gun. I'm sorry. Wait, I grabbed the gun you grab the gun

Yeah, to see I toothy starts panicking and he grabbed he grabs the cops guns Oh, no, suddenly the cops radio comes to life and out of it. We hear Wasn't ready for the next one. Shit. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJ As you point the gun directly at the officer, I want to say a three foot tall spider erupted from the ceiling What? I don't know what's happening Oh my gosh son, look at the size of that thing Oh my god Use it, use it

Shut the fuck out dude, it's not that serious, it's never been that serious The spider is smoking a Jenrio's blunt I bet you that's fucking true Spider offers you a Jenrio's blunt Can't smoke bad in here Toothy, that there is a drug user, you gotta take him off the streets now Oh fuck, I gotta kill him, I gotta kill him Hold up I'm getting a call

**Dramatic music** **Sirens** **Dramatic music** **Laughing** Toothie I need the gun back There's an accident on the highway **Laughing** That's awful

Suddenly the manager tries to come over to calm things down. You gotta put your gun away. I think you should listen to the man. The spider can't be smoking that. We have a rhino pill for sale. You can take a rhino pill, but you can't smoke that blunt. You have gas station, like Oklahoma gas station attendant down pat.

It's crazy. It's crazy It's it's insane. You sound exactly like somebody I would have met at a gas station in Iowa We have a new kind of gushers and stock. Yeah, I was liquid in it You can get with the ladder you can get it with the ladder up here in the front by the ladders Toothy falls to the crumbles to the floor on the floor, hands in front of his face, still holding the gun but weakly. He's kind of dropping it slowly. I can't do this man! I just need my code red! Spider offers him a generous blunt.

Brian Gumbel suddenly breaks down the door to the gas station, running in blood, covering their entire body but they're holding a cell phone in their hands. I've been in an accident. Oh, that was you. Was that you on the officer's phone? I called the police, but they never came. I don't know what's going on. I was getting to it.

You're getting to it? I'm in pain. I'm getting to it. I'm working on it. I'm working on it. Hey dude, you got a missedcall on that thing, by the way Do I hear let me check. CURSE KNOWLEDGE. In the Simpsons tree house of horror season 18 episode 04 Slime girl Homer Simpson vore. What does that have to do with anything?

Officer? That's a really cool fact. That's a cool fact. I think I'm enlightened. I suddenly stopped bleeding. The fact is The fact is healing! I think I'm enlightened. I suddenly stopped bleeding Healing factor from God the curse knowledge. This is the first time a cop has helped anybody Knowledge stay in school my dear friend and driver of long Lexus He's saved Brian Gumbel's chest suddenly erupts with a speaker Just kind of like a xenomorph one of the best things to distract you from life and all its bullshit. Thank you, and have a good one. ["Sweet Home Alone"]

Pfft. I like the vibe break on that one. That's why I picked that one, I was like, oh that's really- That's a really good vibe break. It's a really nice little message, and then it just kinda- It's really calming. You need to turn that rap music down suddenly Harrison Ford after saying that wants to show you what real music sounds like they pull out a zoom with a

speaker attached a Bluetooth speaker but it's wired in via the aux cord oh that's awesome my eight month old can't fall asleep unless she's listening to please stop talking so thanks for being there for her. I'm glad to be there for your nine month old daughter. That child is going to say so many swear words. Should we should we start selling baby bibs as merch? Dude, my secret talent, maybe baby slams. If we made pacifiers, we may like we may have an incorruptible or fully corruptible

like ABDL audience then after that. Oh, we might What are the VSCO girls? No, no, what are the rave girls rave girls? Yeah rave girls Yeah, rave girls with like big big suckers in their mouths. I'm glad you went the high road on that and not like Brendan He's playing. Oh, yeah. Okay. Okay. Okay anyway, the officer's head explodes Anyway, the officer's head explodes. Yeah, okay, whatever. I'm out. I didn't want to be here anyway.

Pfft. Guess what? He grows a new head. Same exact head. Wow. Four adult men walk into the gas station with PSD themed pacifiers in their mouth. Okay. Yeah, four adult men wearing diapers like in Yakuza Kiwami 2.

Walk in with PSD diapers and pacifiers. Their mouths open. Hey, VST. Congrats on episode, I don't care. It's Dak, you owe me $12.10 in royalties on the movie wheels so far. Do not make me get lawyers involved. I'm glad it was Dak that was in the diaper. I'm glad it was Dak that was in the diaper.

I was thinking the same. I was clicking on the Dak button and I was like, that's awesome. Wow Dak, I've never thought about that before I'm toothy and I'm still waiting on my code red. It's my code red You're getting the code red for me. You've forgotten you're getting the code red for she's bro. Shut up. You fucking stoner Yeah, you can't even remember my name to feed. I'm not talking to you. I'm talking to that stoner All right, gotcha the Jenrio's blood-smoking spider. Yes. Yes

Suddenly one of the freezer door opens and a man walks out holding him out new code red The Jenrio's Blond Smoking Spider. Yes. Yes. Suddenly one of the freezer door opens and a man walks out holding a Mountain Dew Code Red. It's me. Hey, were you looking for this? Hi Brendan. Yes, I have been looking for that. You're welcome.

I'm glad I could give you a refreshing Mountain Dew Code Red and bring this journey to an end. Happy PSD100. Wow. And with that, we unhook the last... The gas station explodes and everybody dies. Nobody will ever come back There's one last message

The explosion makes this sound No one is alive to hear this last message Hey, I just wanted to call in and say uh thank you This podcast helped me get laid Your girl got some because of fucking PST How? That's a lie Literally how

I don't believe you Just fucking lie Nobody has ever gotten laid to PST No. That's a lie. Literally how. I don't believe you. Just fucking lie. Nobody has ever gotten laid to PSD. Don't say that. No, because of. It's not changed the parameters here. Oh because of?

Yeah. How do you get laid because of a podcast? I assume you meet someone in the community, which is freakish, but. I'm gonna be honest, this is up there with like Wilt Chamberlain's 100 point game. That shit did not happen. That shit is not fucking right.

You're just straight lying. That's some everybody clapped on the bus type shit. You ever hear about vertical snakes or? Had a few occasions where someone has messaged me to go, hey, I was watching this porn and they're watching your videos on in the background. Huh? That's the thing you get? Yeah, I've gotten that three times now. Different videos. What's the most surprising one of those? One was the fucking...

One was the Mystery of the Druids video was playing in the background. See, that one... I can recognize that one easily. That one I can see because maybe it got recommended and auto-played while they were watching, I don't know, sexy ASMR. They were watching the Giantess 50 video playlist. And then for some reason, your video's in there. Mystery of the Druids added his 51st. The other was Genesis Rising.

I don't remember what the third one was. Okay. The Genesis Rising one was more frightening because it was actually in frame. Oh, wow. In frame? What do you mean in frame? Like they were watching it while doing it?

Like you could see it in the background. Check it out, you made it. That's what the finds make you. It's probably somewhere still my fucking Twitter DMs. I'm sure it's in there still. It's a fucking nightmare. For the most part, I feel like most people are gonna be like, I was watching something

and then I got horny, which is pretty normal, I find. It's like watching, it's the same thing as like watching Netflix and all of a sudden you're like, oh man I don't know moon night gave me a boner. Honestly. I'm really thankful I stopped reading fanfiction years ago because I used to get the weirdest emails about people like basically saying that they were jerking off to my voice For like the smut week

Well, like back during smut week, but even before then like when I was just regularly reading fan fiction before I lost my literacy. That's crazy how that just happened. I was just sick of being for Daniel Reeds. It's just like short. I don't read any more literacy. I don't want to have literacy. I don't want to be literate, man. Last time you read something, it was it was fucking Grady Hendrix.

So, yeah, no, last time I read something was Blood Meridian, which like I. That's crazy. They say that he will never die. He says he's always here. Fuck that book. All that to say thank you for a hundred episode. We are we are big and round with content. This is true.

Why is nobody else? Thank you. My head is in my hands. I have gloves on and it's not gonna make a sound, so. My hands are freezing, actually, I could use those. You gotta get a heated mouse pad, cause that thing fucks, I love a heated mouse pad. Wait, you actually have a heated mouse pad? That's a thing you can get?

That's crazy. So my mouse pad right now is a screenshot from Silent Hill 1, where a dog is jumping at Harry Mason. Yes. Probably a dog house, though I'm not sure since there's no dog around and a dog is jumping at Harry Mason. Probably a dog house though. I'm not sure since there's no dog around and the dog is jumping at him in frame underneath of that. I have a heated mouse pad. That's a great fucking idea.

It's go to even though that was a thing. I got a water cooled gamer chair. Me too. When I piss on my bed, I was going to say, when Mandy mentioned earlier, like this isn't real music. This is real music. I realized recently how fucking insane it is. My mom when I was growing up and if I ever was listening to 50 Cent or some shit because you know 50 Cent that was what's popular back then.

Sorry. She would get into my come into my room with her hands on her hips and just go, Hmm, listening to Yo Man music again. And then she'd just fucking leave. Yo Man? Yo Man? Yo! Yeah, cause they- No! That's what my mom was like. Yeah. They say Yo Man in the music.

Oh, I thought it was like- Rap music is Yo Man music. I'm so thankful my grandma loved Eminem. I thought it was like back in the day, like the English like servants. Oh, like Yo Man. Yeah, they were. Like Yo-M-A-N. Yeah, I thought it was like back in the day like the English like servants. Oh like you Yeah That's what I thought you're talking about as well. Yeah, I what is what are you talking about? We thought your mom was calling it slave music. Yes, your men's were like what?

We're not like this like your house servants basically what yeah Why e o ma and like kind of like middle class health like servants directly through mobility. No! That is not what I- It sounded like she was saying something way worse. No! That's not what I was thinking about at all! Aristocratically worse. No! Oh my god, no! It was- Yeah, a yeoman. A yeoman. You're all far too well read.

I got it immediately. I had. And I still thought it was bad. Bailey, it's okay. The N word is in my baby book. So like, I will take the hit. I have a racial mom. Excuse me.

Why your baby book? Yours is worse than mine. They say the word yo. They say yo and they also say man. Gotcha, okay. So they say yo man. Right. That's not. Why is that in your baby book? That's I don't know. My mom was 15. But like your baby book. How do you

Yeah, I genuinely my baby book is super fucking blank and then like written halfway in there is just the N word like hard R like hard R like just there as its own word. No context. Like my mom was an edgy teenager who had a baby and then went through the book and then the middle of the book, it's just like in little words, just the N word written there. Baby Brendan's weight and it just says the N word.

Something like that, yeah. I'd have to go and get it and look back through it. That's fucking crazy. It's a childhood artifact. I can't believe I learned a new, that's actually every time we record lately, I just learned a new slur. Always learning, always improving.

Like from the Lorax. Well, it's not really a slur. Well, Yeoman's not really a slur. It's not a slur? No. Using it in the context of saying that all rap music is Yeoman music, referring to like- It's like, oh, it is derogatory in that term. Also because your mom is very French.

So we're looking at in the context of like- She doesn't know what it is. I don't even know. I didn't even know what that was. That puts a lot of things into context now. It would be like saying I was driving down the road and some filthy surf was running across it too quickly. Like it's like a noble woman

about how she didn't like rap music. Billy, how many bushes of weed are currently in storage at your parents palace Billy you have to tell me how many bushes of weed one it's not a bush though a bushel oh my god a bushel how big is a bushel how many Toyota Camry's how many Toyota Camry's wide it's not as big as a bush but it's a bush oh you some context that you understand in In Assassin's Creed Shadows, would you pick up little wheat? That's a bushel. Like that's a bushel of wheat.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, okay, okay. One, because they, at one point they had like one of their longtime friends gave them a seed for like a seed to grow weed and they grew a little weed plant, but my mom doesn't smoke it Oh, I think wheat Stop incriminating your parents. It's not incriminating what it's legal here. Yeah. No, I know I'm just I'm just saying I said wheat Yeah, I heard weed. I'm really it's one of those days for me. I'm really fucking struggling with it. With what I did start it with gas station RP. I'm like,

I did have a little story I wanted to talk about cause I totally forgot that even happened cause I was really drunk and then I got really sick in an Uber and I felt so bad. I wanted to forget that memory for our first marriage anniversary. Boo and I went to this bar with a few of our friends, but we basically stayed way later than they did. And we kept drinking. And when I drink, I get extroverted.

I'm already an extroverted guy, but when I drink, I'm like, dude, I will talk with everyone in this bar. And so I kept telling people like, hey, buy it. You should buy us shots. It's our wedding anniversary. Haha. And it worked a lot. So we had a lot of shots and this older, I think they were both in their 50s.

This older couple, we just start talking with them, whatever. It they talk about how they have like a yacht or not a yacht, but like they have they they're like boat people, you know, like boomer boat people. Yeah. Yeah. Like they name the boats Sheila or some shit, right? That's so fucking real. You get exactly what I mean. We keep drinking. We keep talking. She keeps buying me more beers and we were like, it's just nice. It's a nice little little time. I love talking with people. And all of a sudden she's like, I think maybe you guys should visit us on the boat. You know, maybe you guys should visit us on the boat. We're not

too far from here. And I was during the summer and I was like, oh, that sounds great. In my head, I'm like never fucking happening. Obviously after tonight, I will forget you existed And then she she keeps saying like cuz you know, you guys are you guys look good. You guys look pretty good This is like me and my partner like your vibe kind of deal It was literally that and like and he was like, you know, we've never done any like any Partying and she kind of kind of like winked a little bit like partying with gay dudes before so it could be interesting for my husband and that's when I started to clue in like oh dude they're like trying to fuck us how many pineapples you looked out and saw her like pineapple approach you're like

oh no yeah interesting for my husband yeah oh is that a thing yeah pineapples is a swinger thing yeah it's a swinger thing. Yeah. It's a swinger thing. Oh, they were swingers though. A hundred percent. They like, just say you're allergic. I did. I should have said that I, the thing is I did something dumber. I kept going with it because I was getting free beer. I'm not going to lie, dude. I traded my cell phone number for a Guinness. So these swingers have our, I have my phone number because I wanted another beer and these swingers have our I have my phone number because I wanted another beer and I was so drunk. I'm going to be honest. There was some spots that were missing. Boo and I were fucked up. We got back home. I

went to bed like almost immediately. I wake up with one of the worst hangovers I've ever gotten in my life. And I just like I just look at my phone just all fucking groggy like, Oh fuck, what the hell happened last night? And I just look at my phone just all fucking groggy like, oh, fuck, what the hell happened last night? And I just see this fucking text from us. I don't know who the fuck this is. And it's just a woman being like, hey, Billy, I had a great time last night, and I can't wait to explore more of our relationship later. Kisses, kissy, kiss kissy and then she just had

a picture of her a boat and I was like oh fuck oh god free boat ride I like how the boat is set is like a right come to the boat you got to go to the boat but fully kidded out in fishing gear the phone number I could I could message I never blocked her I just never answered because I was freaked out in the morning. You could go full fishing gear. Like come up in like the full fishing gear with the hat with clothes. Least sexy outfit ever. Least sexy outfit ever with a bunch of worms. Telling me, do you have some fishnets on? Nah, but they're in my tackle box.

Yeah, so that's how I traded my phone number with a swinger for fucking beer. Are they still hitting you up? No. Well, they hit me up a few times, but I never answered. Right. I kind of just ghosted them because I did not know. What the fuck do I even say to that? How big was their boat? Exactly.

It was, I, okay. Okay. To be, it was honestly a very nice boat. I'm sure they had great sex parties. They seemed like gracious hosts. Like, I'm sure you would go there. You would have like a cheese selection charcuterie board. How do sex parties work? Do you get like charcuterie boards before fucking or do you get them after?

If I had to guess, they're sex. No, you get a gift bag when you leave. You get a gift bag. What do you even get in a gift bag from swingers? S. D. Toast. Plan B. gift bag when you leave. You get a gift bag? What are you even getting a gift bag from swingers? SUD toasts. Plan B. It's like how my one buddy, he had come back to us telling us he sold himself off to a

cougar for a PS5. What do you mean sold off? I want you to think about what I mean. Sold off. He's like, yeah, this woman keeps texting me, she won't be my sugar mommy. So I say, you know what? In that PlayStation. He came back the next week. He had a PlayStation kind of beast mode.

Not even a lie. You have a little fun. You have a little PS5. You have a bit more fun. Then you can play Astro Bot and think about all the times you had sex with this older woman feel bad because like, you know, he bought it right when it was coming out. So it's like, what, five years of no games.

Oh, man. Well, yeah, that was on computer. Well, yeah, that is on computer. Nothing else matters in PlayStation yet could be like life of black tiger. It'll get on there. That's so old That's so fucking old man. Oh Pulling decrepit things out of the grimoire the breathing life into them So can't believe there's an AVGN video on that. I can't believe there's two AVGN video games Hey, man, three. I'm gonna have to calm down after this recording, watch some Puppet Steve. What is Puppet Steve?

That's Chris Bours, the Array Gamer. Chris Bours. It's his toy review channel. Well he's hunting ghosts now. Like he's an exorcist or something. No, he still uploads regularly to Puppet Steve though. Like every single day almost. Really?

Yeah, like regularly uploading to Puppet Steve. I thought he moved on to exorcisms You're can puppet Steve makes an appearance in the minecraft movie It would be crazy if they literally just if Chris spurs just appeared as himself What if what if he's the child between Jennifer Coolidge and the villager? All right, also devastated that she's not playing a villager that movies fucking did to me now I there's literally gonna be a scene where the villager goes,

and she goes, and she goes, and she goes, Oh, I just zoned back in. Are you fucking cool aging again? I need a hot dog. Yeah, Jennifer Coolidge. I try my Turkish delights.

There was some Minecraft movie this week. I was out of my back deck just reading and there's this path near my yard. It's usually like kind of in the underbrush when it's, you know, more, what's the word, lush. It's spring, their leaves are coming back a bit, but I can actually see the path now. And there's some kids in their bikes, they're going really fast. And this one kid was yelling at the top of his lungs, Flint and steel, and tried to do

like a bunny hop on his little bike and then he ate shit and hit a tree. Is that what awoken you to watch my parkour civilization? Is that what like... That probably, yeah, it was that day, Brendan. It started storming that night and I went, I should see what this parkour civilization thing is about. You watched parkour? You're so late to the party. Well, I saw bits of it everywhere. Brendan was talking about it and how he, he vaguely explained it a long time ago, about how you pay for anything in parkour. And then when I saw the kid like nearly die, yelling about flint and steel, I was like, Oh yeah, there's that Minecraft movie. I tried to look up like Minecraft movie and

I saw parkour civilization came up somehow. And I went, Oh right. I should see what that's about. I like that you had a second hand near death experience that made you do this. Well, the thing is, cause I, I knew like, okay, pay for anything in parkour. And then when I actually watched it, I went, oh, this is like, this is like baby's first dystopian YA novel combined with like a shonen thing. And it's like, oh, it's perfectly makes sense why this got so popular. Though it also made me feel a little bit insane because I realized, Brendan, I don't care if you told me this or if I found out later, that like, the movie, quote-unquote, is edited down from a series

of like, some Minecraft. Yeah. The recaps were starting to make me feel like I was having a lobotomy, because every five minutes, you would suddenly re-explain things that happened like a minute ago, or 30 seconds ago. I was losing my mind. BG It's honestly, they figured out a peak way to make you experience watching the One Piece anime during the Doflamingo arc. It's just a good third of the episode is recap. Don't even. That's like my favorite part of the One Piece anime where it's like they do Rebecca's flashback like 17 times. And it's in its entirety. It's just like why? Because they have to fill time. It's literally two years of the anime.

They have to fill time. One minute of new content for an episode it's that and it's the Alabasta where they like cross the desert go. Ah shit I forgot my keys and then cross it again and then go back People have gone through and read it in one piece one. Yeah, the filler. Yeah Yeah, what if we went back through and it's just the recap? Oh a recap It's all filler. How would you move it forward?

Non-linear storytelling time. Could you imagine the One Piece challenge, which is why only the recaps of the last 900 episodes of One Piece, and then you have to do a quiz about the story? Yeah, exactly. Who is Blackbeard? What did he think about the pie?

One Piece being an influence makes sense from where I think about it. Parkour civilization felt like Maze Runner and Oxycodon filled with vine booms. Is it like the main antagonist of parkour civilization skin just like Atem from Yu-Gi-Oh? This is a you question. Nobody else can answer this. I don't watch parkour civilization.

He's like a knight. I'm looking up. Yeah, he's like the parkour champion. He's some like Minecraft YouTuber who goes by like his own name It would be like if everyone in the in like the maze runner used their own name or uh of hunger games And then like oh my god markiplier betrayed me and just like markipliers. They're playing markiplier. Holy shit pita jumped for the beef shut up I'm thinking of

Sea watt gaming is the person that name. That was the one. That is just a tem. I love parkour civilization because it's just fuck dude. Parkour god gave me the juice. Get fucked. Alright next art. That's the thing like the actual cast system is like the parkour thing is kind of stupid but there's something, it's like someone thought about it a long time and there is like bits

of foreshadowing throughout it. Where ofnique like oh there's the man falling in the corner. Oh, that's why this guy had this around. But at the same time, so much is solved by just, I closed my eyes and I did it. The parkour god came down and, but again, this is across his arms because the guy made it's probably 14. I have no idea. CB 0.00. But also like in following its influence, that is like a grand majority of Naruto. It's like, I just closed my eyes and it just happened. Yeah, I have so little knowledge of Naruto in one piece. You're more knowledgeable about parkour civilization now. I've seen it and that's my knowledge of it.

Fucking parkour civilization. Fucking animals. For those who aren't aware, let me describe this shit. It's like this vertical world where you have to jump everywhere. And if you become like a parkour pro, you get farther up to the second level of world and if you fall down you either you fall to like a jail or you fall to like the lower cast below you and the people in the bottom have to eat raw meat. Oh my god. It's just the platform. It's just. Remember the noob animals they have to eat the raw meat of the noob animals because they make the animals parkour.

Yeah, and the platform they lower the big thing of like food. What gets me is you get to the second level and they have their farm, but then there's like this huge gap with the course between them. And then the cow, the Minecraft cow starts doing parkour to get to their side. And the animals who fall hit the ground and they harvest that meat to feed it to the lower people raw because the parkour pros only eat the cooked meat of animals who could do parkour They could get the beast that makes them powerful Meat of parkour animals, I'm not eating some loser me that has some weird religious like cultish

Yeah, there's something to it. Like oh my god They eat raw meat down there because the animals who fell will only consume a beast of and only the worthy meat at the top Good. Yeah, only the beef at the top gets cooked because that cow could do parkour It's so stupid, but there's something to that at the same time at the same time It is genius if it could parkour that means the muscles are well developed and isn't that basically what Wagyu beef is really? I mean, they said some bullshit like an increase your parkour powers, but yeah, it's parkour Kobe. Why not? Because it's got developed muscles and when you open it it probably has a nice fat distribution Massaged by Minecraft gaming youtubers the greatest of massaging never mind

by Minecraft gaming YouTubers. The greatest at massaging, nevermind. Prepared by our finest gaming YouTubers. I'm hoping that the Minecraft movie is just Jack Black pointing at every Minecraft item and then just saying it. Can't wait for Polish Dan to say it. So far it's looking like the... Every fucking trailer I've seen of it,

which isn't many, is him just naming shit in the game. Chicken Jackie. Ender Pearl. Ficted Steel. Chicken Jackie. Hero Brain. C418 Music Disc. It just looks like an SNL sketch.

It's really weird. It really is. Honestly, I think that's a great vibe for it. It doesn't look like a movie. It looks like an SNL sketch. Oh, you know what? Actually, this is better. It looks like a fucking Corridor Digital video.

Yes. You're right. Somehow, Freddie Wong has returned. Who is Freddie Wong? Is he in court or did he? What is he doing? He just uploaded something a month ago. Oh, I guess he's still going. Oh, he worked on a movie in 2024.

What? Oh. That's kind of what I was thinking he would be doing, if I'm honest. It makes sense. I kind of thought Freddie Wong would just, it just makes sense for him to go from video game high school to, I don't know, dune. What is he up to? To dune? Dune. Does is he up to? To Dune?

Dune? Yeah, he makes your flame right off. He's a basic old pivvy. He's gonna be bald. Yeah, he did all of the gun flash effects in Dune. Hey. It's inspired me to go look up Shane Dawson, and it's just all you.

Smiley Toon? Oh, Christ. No, we're moving on. Smiley Toon. No, we talked about the Shane Dawson pizza video, because that still pisses me off. Excuse me? Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.

Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.

Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.

Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I've taken a pizza out of like hot out of the oven and just cut up with a pizza cutter quickly and you're not like measuring it out evenly. Yeah, it changes its shape a bit as it's sitting there like coming out of the oven still cooking more. If you rest it, it's gonna keep cooking, yes. Yeah, the shape distorts a little bit. It'd be cheaper and easier to just make the new pizza. It would be more complicated to reform it.

Actually, you're right. Oh my God, he has an hour long video about the Domino's conspiracy. I'm done. What, what, what Domino's conspiracy? Apparently there's the Domino's conspiracy. I'm done. What? What? What Domino's conspiracy? Apparently there's a Domino's conspiracy.

I don't know, man. Fuck! Now is it? They just be eating your pizza. The real conspiracy is that he actually fuck his c***. When you say that, Billy, can you add in like the fucking like creepy music that Shane Dawson uses during his documentaries to it? Hey, I'm going to be honest, man.

I'm just not going to, I'm just going to have to censor that one. I don't think we can. I don't think we can have me talking about him f***ing his c***. Well, don't say it again. No, I mean, allegedly. Just say allegedly. Just just insert allegedly.

Yeah. Before you say it on the podcast, you can say whatever you want if you say allegedly. You know, to be fair, I'm not the one that said it. He literally brought it up for no f***ing reason on Twitter. If he said he f***ed the c*** and then he said, I didn't f*** my c***. Allegedly. But he did do blackface multiple times.

That's known. That's not alleged. Oh no. Yeah, but blackface is blackface and f***ing your c*** is f***ing your c***. So you're saying blackface is more ethical than f***ing your c***. Hey guys, 100 episodes.

It's been a great run. The last one, finally, real. Is it illegal to do blackface? No. No, but it's greatly frowned upon. See, that's what I'm saying, but it's illegal to f*** your c***. Dude, it's been censor sounds for the last five minutes.

Billy, I'm so glad that you've come out to vitally say that ethical blackface is possible once we dismantle capitalism. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, ethical blackface is just the Navy SEALs. That's it. Welcome to Who Wants to be a Millionaire? Which recreational activity was done by both Shane Dawson and the old Prime Minister of Canada, starting now. Don't forget about Rogue Warrior with Mickey Rorick.

Oh, you're right. I hope people understand that I was joking back there. No, that was she obviously Billy Billy, I don't think you have to turn around to talk to the passengers. The car is crashed They're all dead hundreds are dead Conspiracies are great because you could just decide something. Yeah, I love my favorite conspiracy is genuinely and always will be what if his head just did that That's good. What do you mean? What if what if JFK's head just did that what if nobody shot nobody died? What if his head just did that dude? I mean some people self-immolate. Why not self explode?

What if the Secret Service gave him head exploding pills mean spontaneously combust yeah, that's what I mean I remember like when I was when I was like 12 or 13. I was really into watching like Darkest things you didn't know about like cartoons and and shit, right? Like those kinds of videos. I remember I watched one. Yeah. I remember I watched one and it was like all the, all the rugrats are dead and shit like that. And I was like, wow, that's crazy. And I sat there for two seconds. I go, why does that matter? Why do I fucking care? And that's when I grew up. That's a good way to just snap that out of it. You were like,

I literally just went, why does that matter? It was that and the, um, cause I know there were joke videos, but even still the game theory is Mario communist videos. I was like, why does this matter? Who gives a fuck? Those are amazing. I stand behind those. Honestly, I wish I had game theory when I was younger because it's like reading those creepy pastas and fan theories in my childhood led me to go and be on X for like a whole year in high school. I still ended up there. Don't worry. I love top of summoning ritual threads. I just got guy go on and I'm like, can we summon one? Can we make it real? Can we summon a top? I give my blood to you. We do this. Oh, I mean, it's really fun to go on X and you post like

vague blurred images of trees and see who could see gray aliens and stuff And then is that a past time? I mean, I should have posted this Mandy. I should have posted this stick man on there. Fuck Yeah, I mean there's a like usually if you go on X's people always going like I'm trying to summon succubus How do I do it? But you just like post the grainiest photo of like a dog or something in like the woods Like I saw Chupacabra, it's spoken tongues at me. And people are like, oh, you're a fucking idiot. Like that's a tulpa.

It's always a tulpa. It's always a tulpa. You're a moron, it's a tulpa. I still think- You fucking idiot. I still think the greatest like post in ex history is the guy who's like, I was awake in my house, like playing video games or something. And then I blinked and I woke up and it was morning.

As anyone experiences this, it's like you fell asleep. It's such a good pose. Oh, sometimes I just have a really vivid dream and I'm like, damn, go back. Oh yeah, I had a dream the other night. Yeah. Do you want to hear about it?

Sure. I had this dream where I was in the grocery store with my mom and then we go back to her house and she's like, I have to tell you, I did get married yesterday and didn't tell you. Door opens, Bernie Sanders. Yes! You could probably do worse.

The dream continues, it shifts. Bernie Sanders and I are in a shrine in Japan, both of us wearing kimonos and drinking tea, looking at a street and the street, it's dark out and rain is pattering on the ground. Bernie Sanders is just explaining things to me like, you know, I'm gonna treat your mom right. Everything's gonna be okay.

Everything's gonna be all right. I'm gonna take care of it. And then in the darkened street under a flickering street lamp is somebody in a Goku mascot costume. Bernie Sanders looks at me and says, I gotta take care of this. He busts out of the window and runs towards the Goku

and then I wake up. He pushed you out of the dream to keep you safe. You're going to bed tonight and you're going to get the continuation. I want the sequel. It's better than my Goku and Vegeta building building houses. Stress dreams. I'll take those over that. Yeah, I don't like those. I don't like those at all. You told me about them. I don't fuck with those.

I fuck with Bernie Sanders. I'd rather have the Bernie Sanders dad dreams. It's kind of a warm feeling to know that he's gonna take care of your mom You know, it's nice. What historical figure would you want to be your dad? Hmm Presumably somebody who would be in a history somebody who has done a thing. Okay history. My dad's a legend already I'll keep him one day. You'll have to tell us about buckets. Oh, yeah, he's a legend on our island What the fuck is the the guy's name the witch trials guy Giles Corey

Yeah, what did he do? Giles Corey? They crushed that guy to death with a rock What why did he do that? Because he wouldn't say that he was a witch cuz he wasn't I mean that I feel like that would So they were like whatever man say say say you're a witch and we'll stop putting rocks on you and he screamed more We know crushed over the rocks until he died. I feel like he'd be a good dad I feel like he'd be a good dad. I feel like he'd be a good dad. Just go with beast mode. Like pre-rock, probably fine. Probably like Itzio Auditorio is my dad, you know?

That's not a real person. You're so stupid. Such a gamer. Prove it. Hey man, you prove it. Da Vinci was real and he's in that game. I don't know man, I kind of want Daedalus to be my dad. Daedalus?

Yeah. Fucking, wait, which Daedalus? Daedalus, the one who blocked his fucking son in a labyrinth? Yeah. Not the one from Deus Ex. Oh, we're talking mythology. I love that we've named two not real people. I thought you wanted Chatbot from fucking Deus Ex.

The one that like betrays Magenta Tron. Nah, I wanna be Icarus. Let me fly too close to the sun. I'm not gonna do it. I know better. If Chatbots are on the table, I won Xerxes. Who's Xerxes? From System Shock 2.

Is that the one that was right? Uh, I thought we were talking. What's the one that was, that turned racist by Microsoft? That was Taybot. Jodan is my mom. Dan Bull is my dad. Let's do it. Say Dan Bull is your dad.

Actually, Dan Bull is your dad would be interesting. Like I tried to do homework. You hear like muffled English rapping downstairs. Boom, boom, boom. How does your dad be interesting? Like a trade do homework. You hear like muffled English rapping downstairs. I wouldn't shoot one in minecraft. Does he do a Minecraft rap? They got a bilateral rap probably. You know, it's better than minecraft. Yeah, you want to transition over to Patreon questions, don't you? Patreon questions. If you're part of the $5 and above tiers, you can ask us a question on the Pa- uh, yep.

We could do that. 100 episodes. 100 episodes. 100 episodes. And I still- Dude, I fucking hate doing transitions. It sucks. Fuck transitions. We just go in there. Finally! You've opened the floodgates!

That is so funny, because I think this episode, more than any other episode, we just did a whole roleplay thing full of just transitions between audio to audio. Half those voicemails were just sound effects. We've done that one too. We haven't learned. We haven't learned. That just proves that we have at least a hundred episodes more of learning to do. I don't think this show's about learning.

I feel like this show is about the opposite of learning. That's why I'm worried about that one dude's baby. Hey, wait, no, wait. We know what Yeoman are today. We learned. Oh, dude's baby. Hey, no, wait, we know what Yomino today. We learned. Oh, that's true. Oh, shit. Actually, real quick, we got to we got to for that one dude's baby,

we got to make fucking babies. Oh, yeah, we got to. We got to. How would babies want to hear baby noises? What? Baby to baby communication. Now listen here. If you look in your daddy's car, if you look at your father's car

in the glove compartment, there will be a nine millimeter pistol. You're going to take that and go down to the local casino. Put your hand in the cash register for no reason. Is it asleep yet? Comment below. Yeah, let us know if the baby is asleep. Adam Galloway, let us know. Is your baby asleep?

That's so creepy. That's like a horror movie thing. That sounds like a web ad. I think we're at a post baby timeline. When I say post baby, I mean, babies are gonna be male men now, so no, Boo Yo asks, which podcast member could break the streak? What streak?

I'd do it. Oh, yeah. The Undertaker's Wrestlemania streak. Oh. I already know the Undertaker's, I would already know the Undertaker's weak points and it's literally just, hey man, I don't like cops. And he'd fall over after a heart attack.

He'd have a heart attack about it. He likes cops? Fall over about it. He likes cops. He's a big cop lover. Yeah. I would just, I would just make milkshake mix in the early new to the lore behind the other trigger, but that was a very strange way to break the streak. They should have had anybody else break the streak. Brock Lesnar breaking the streak was kind of like an absolutely insane.

Yeah. It's like, this will hype it up. And it was, it was something I feel done almost, almost out of desperation for the fact that Vince McMahon had no faith that Daniel Bryan going over at the end was going to be satisfying for people, even though it was, it's like one of the best WrestleMania moments ever. I can't answer this.

They answered pretty clear cut out. I'm pretty sure it's Brendan. It's probably Brendan, but Brendan, you didn't go to wrestle wrestler camp. You don't have to. Hi, real quick. Let me see. 6'10". What about real height? Yeah. Is there a character in WWE, like a person who just like studies everyone and knows all their weaknesses? Yes. There have been multiple of these.

There have been multiple wrestlers with that gimmick, yeah. This is anime. Yeah. Yeah, that's what wrestling is. Wrestling is anime if it was good. I'm gonna add filler content into WWE. No, trust me, it's already there. Filler content is literally,

you can name an anime thing, it's in there. Filler content is literally anything The Miz has done over the last like 10 years. Do they have like a Mecha John Cena arc or something? Oh, you are so stuck on Mecha Naruto. It's insane. You have brought back Mecha Naruto. They did actually give Samoa Joe a bionic arm in one of the WWE video games.

They gave Samoa Joe a bionic arm. It's like every month. It's in my mind permanently, Billy. Every month you bring back Mecha Naruto. It's insane. I just always think of Mecha Naruto. It's the quintessentially filler arc. Wait, this is real. Yes, Megan

Say Billy, this is why I keep fucking bring this back up cuz no one's cuz it's interesting It looks like someone tried to buy fucking astro blind Aliexpress This is like a two to two to three episode. Ah, holy shit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah He turns into a cannon and he also turns into a helicopter car. Isn't he like top tier in that one fighting game as well? Ultimate Interest Arms. I swear to fucking god. And one of those he's in the suit so it's like an actual fun time Naruto.

Naruto has to fight Mecha Naruto. Yeah this is the Metal Sonic of the Naruto universe. Okay I just saw a screenshot that looked like he was like in the suit, like Iron Man. Yeah, no. This is not an Iron Man. This is a Metal Sonic. He turns into a car? What the fuck? Can I get the car? Of course he does. He's mecha. I'm going to turn into a truck now.

He's like a Transformer. He's mecha Naruto. I have a question. If you could turn into a vehicle, what would you turn into? Mecha Naruto. That's not a vehicle! Bullshit! I'm pulling out the picture, I'm pulling out the same truck, I'm pulling it up, Billy's talking shit! No! Transformation complete.

I was heard to do a horse, yeah. I guess a horse is a fucking... Check the chat, read them in weeks, that's a vehicle. Oh my god, that's a vehicle! I reckon a penny-f farthing would be pretty funny to turn into. A penny what? Penny farthing.

Yeah. It's the really big wheel bicycle. Oh, a penny farthing would be cool. Yeah, big wheel bike, super dangerous. Cause like you can hear the thing. Right. Is, if somebody told me I could turn into a vehicle and that's a power I unlocked, I wouldn't do it

because they did not tell me that I could turn back from a vehicle. Okay. What if you could? If I could turn back from a vehicle, I still would do it. Think of the stress that would be on I could turn back from a vehicle, I still wouldn't do it. Think of the stress that would be on the body. It wouldn't stress you. It wouldn't hurt. It would stress your body out. It would break your,

but you have to fucking break your bones. I would turn into a ripstick. I would turn into Heelys, but just the wheel part. A wheel. Just a very small little wheel. Become a wheel. Specifically it has the little divot so that it fits into a Heely. It holds into the shoe. Yeah. Right.

Yeah. I miss my heelies like crazy. So you're useless without someone who has the heelie shoe that's missing a wheel. Teamwork. Teamwork. That's why he's married. Yeah, that's why I'm married. Prove. Who's gonna have the freaking step on you? Yeah, wait, does Boo turn into the shoe?

Is this like fucking Ultron? Like... Oh, this is like Ultron for foot fetishists. Yeah, wait, does boo turn into the shoe is this like fucking This is like Ultron for foot fetishist Shoe I don't like where this is going Now now we just do one more person is her into the big foot from courage to cowardly dog Not a vehicle a horrible cuz I'm not I'm not imagining that you're magically transferring into these vehicles I'm imagining your bones are shifting around and you're still in case. Yeah, you're like anamorphic.

Wasn't there a comic where someone was transformed into like a Pixar car? Yeah, with like their skin and stuff. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I just, I don't want to be, but I want to own like a Razor scooter, but it's made out of a skeleton. It'd go hard. It just has a little skull on the front. Oh, nevermind, Brennan. I was fucking mixing it up with a wear diaper again.

It's just made out of the broken shins of children. No, they'd be ethically sourced boats. Why? That is weird as hell. That's not weird as hell. Have you ever smacked your ankle on a razor? Yeah, your shins get fucking destroyed by those things. An adult didn't fucking go and harvest my shins to make a scooter.

Lucky. How do you know? Look down, look at your shins. Well, it's just a demonic device that every time that a child is hit in the shins with a razor scooter, it becomes a part of the bone scooter. A chip of bone disappears and it adds to the bone scooter. You're adding a lot of rules to say that there's no creepy fucking gang going around finding children falling at skate parks. Yeah, this is all stuff you invented, you weirdo.

You're gonna remind me of the Tumblr Bone Witch stuff. Oh, the Bone Gazi thing? Yep. Bone Gazi? Have you never heard it called that? No! Oh, do you know what that is? No.

Oh, it's like one of the greatest call out posts of all time where someone's like at like little monster fucker Has been robbing human graves and stealing their their bones. Oh wait I vaguely am are hearing about that Yeah to cast like witches spells and they kept saying these are ethical bones that the bones are ethically sourced But they kept stealing out of a state stole them out of like a poppers grave It's it's a PSA tumblr user, little fucking monsters stealing human bones from cemeteries in Louisiana. Please don't let them get away with this.

Spread the word slash signal boost. That's crazy. And it's like, people were initially, I remember it was like people were initially mad, not because they were stealing bones, but because like Brendan said, it was from a poppers grave, so it was technically racist. Jesus.

If I stole bones, I would do it wokely. Well, they weren't like digging the bones up what was happening was it was like in New Orleans I like the storms would wash the bones up and then they would just take the bone Like going out like the undertaker and digging the graves up with a shovel It's because the because it was a proper poppers grave the bones and the bodies weren't properly stored So bones would just wash up. Okay, I thought I was like I'm sure I'm choosing demographics to steal bones for What is even the point of like calling out somebody for that so it's because they're all in a witch community They were selling it for they were selling. Yeah, they were selling their

Rituals. Yeah, like the fucking itsy witches just selling yes. Yeah exactly that that became so much more insane They're like the first generation of Etsy witches actually probably second the first one exists on a like a board that doesn't exist anymore Well cuz the I was like reading more about this They originally like moved the tumblr because they got ousted from their Facebook group for doing the same fucking thing Yeah, I mean Etsy witches have lots of bone income because they shoplift everything else. Yeah, they have a lot of disposable income for bones. What's your guys' favorite Etsy curse? Mine's the Pagan King's torture.

Yeah, that's my favorite. It's the only one. I know. That's the only one I remember. That's the only one I paid for. By the way, Brendan, has it happened yet? No, I'm fine. I don't know what you're...

I'm not worried about Etsy. What? Honestly, my wife keeps buying Etsy curses and she shows me the receipts and it's just ball shrinking curse, ball shrinking curse. She's bought about a hundred of them now and they don't work. So like, honestly, I think my balls keep getting larger. It says quick cast, fast results, and it's just not working. Five spells on fiverr. Damn. What about you, Sheena? What would you, what are you, what would you transform into? Real witch curse. What about you Sheena? What would you what are you what would you transform into? Real whiskers

Like it like a golf buggy I would pick the long Lexus like like a dune buggy Smooth smooth buggy Smooth buggy that the one't know the- I don't know the- Smooth buggy. Smooth buggy. Smooth buggy. The one that makes me think of lady bugs. I don't know. I don't know, Carl. Oh, like a VW? I thought it'd be funny if I just-

Like Herbie fully loaded? Oh my gosh, yeah. Herbie posted. We would have all said Herbie. I was thinking, I was thinking speed buggy. So I just imagined she was like, I wanna be this and tell mysteries. I thinking speed buggy. So I just imagine she does like ought to be this it's all mysteries I hate to be buggy. I hate speed buggy too. Nobody likes speed buggy and yet he's still here

I would kill speed buggy. Javrojaw is just marginally better Brendan you genuinely awakened the memory. I have to sit here for a moment That's a Brendan specialty it's playing against the back of my freaking skull. I can't believe you're listening to Where Is My Mind by the Pixies and it zooms out of your chair as you spin your chair around. You see, Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Because I couldn't remember the name Kirby. I really really wanted a Kirby game. For the DS. Because this like summer camp I went to they had like a technology time for one hour we

could play on DS's and stuff. I didn't have it. So every Christmas I would ask for a DS and a Herbie game because I incorrectly remembered the name. So I got a Herbie game for the DS one year. There was a Herbie game for the DS? Dude, everything about a DS game. There was a stop smoking DS game. Like there was.

No, that was okay. That was the DS life collection thing where it was like, they had cookbooks and fashion organizers or whatever. That's not the same. Still plays on the DS life collection thing where it was like they had cookbooks and fashion organizers or whatever That's not the same still plays on the DS. Okay. Yes If there was a PSD themed dating sim What gifts would increase or decrease everybody's affection and what would everyone's romance roles look like? I don't care about the second part of that Just the what would what would you have to be gifted to increase your your affection level in the PSD dating sim me copy of haze

Hayes nectar Hayes m Nectar, Hayes, Mince, Jane Carpenter, Funko Pop. I mean that it sucks because I, for me, it would definitely be Norbit. You can have a couple. So we just kind of have two. Okay. Fine. Norbit. Um, a bueno bar, man. I thought you were going to say a geek bar and I was going to go, hell yeah, brother. Yeah. Yeah. Geek bar. I thought you were going to say a geek bar and I was going to go, hell yeah, brother. Yeah. Geek bar.

The thing that would make my affinity go down would be a galaxy gas. I'd be like, ew, sorry. I don't do that. Staying with him and there's an all purpose jumbo Josh item. I keep trying to give it to Mandy, but he keeps rejecting it. Yeah. That's, that's my negative item. That's my negative. That's my positive. I have a jumbo Josh. Who has negative Norbit? I think everyone's neutral to Norbit. I'll take the bullet. You'll take the bullet. Okay. I'll take the, I do hate Norbit. So you do hate Norbit. Yeah. How are you doing? I'm like you. Right in the blowhole. I fucking seen it. All right. It's all over my fucking

I can see it from here. It's an entire row of my little library thing, bookshelf, media shelf. Whatever, Knorr blings handle them. Knorr blings? I need to DM Boo and just have Boo start adding copies of Knorr bit without you like looking, so you just keep scrolling in the background. We should do icing for Knorr bit,

where if you find a copy of Knorr bit, you have to watch the entirety. Oh my God. My positive is a world map that includes New Zealand and then my negative is the alternative of that being a map without New Zealand. Wait is that a thing that happens? You don't know about the reddit maps without New Zealand? What the fucking what? That's a I didn't know that happened that often what? Yeah there's a whole there there's a whole Reddit, is it page? Fucking sorry, I do not go on Reddit,

but where it's basically just a collection of maps that don't have New Zealand on it. And it's a lot, like even in professional institutional buildings. I'm pretty sure like one of our old institutions had a map in it that didn't have New Zealand on it. Famously, RISC does not have New Zealand on it, I'm pretty sure yeah

I'm looking at it right now. There. This is way more than I thought hey my my desk map That is a map of earth does have New Zealand on it this this restaurant in New Zealand does not have New Zealand It's fucking bad. Yep One of your positive items be dice and They'd be dice. Dice, ammo and beer. Yeah, it's everything you need. Ammo? Mac and cheese as well. Mac and cheese is so good, bro.

Someone gave me that. Oh, I'd be fucking- That would just be a universal item, right? Yeah. Yeah, you know what? That's like the golden item, the golden ticket item. Would Mike be a secret character in the dating sim? Oh, look at Michael.

Wow. He's shy behind the behind a door. Here's a DVD copy of black butler Here's a 1995 1996 McFauley wrestling match collection Brendan if you were if you weren't married you'd be getting messages right now. I know Yeah, he's is also my negative item. He's is your negative item. He's is also my negative item Do you have any positive items? Unromantable teacher character. I think I think Mandy it's gonna be a small shrieking skull sure as as sec death whistle strange movies and games that aren't Norbit or Hayes specifically Everyone except those two. Here's a copy of lair for you Mandy and dots dots the candy. Oh wait, don't fog. I don't

You like dots. I was I was gonna say that's crazy Aren't dots something different in Canada dots are like little gummies that I don't like gumdrops you're thinking of smarties I'm thinking of smarties. I'm thinking of smarties I'm thinking of smarties smarties are fucking delicious in Canada and disgusting in the u.s. Yeah They're they're a chalky little candy in the I love I love buying the chalky smarties though cuz I make smepsi I do yeah Well dots like airheads or it's easy to get shit ones. I fucking know we're not doing I fucking hate smepsi. That's so gross. Wait, what's smepsi? Smepsi is a drink I used to make when I was a kid

I would take Pepsi and put a bunch of smarties in there and I'd call it smepsey and I'd say it's mepsy time Are you Brandon honest question? Are you diabetic? No, my grandpa was though. You're you're a miracle. Yeah, also you're heading down the path You're on your way little soldier like you don't know you got to try cinnamon egg You got to try smepsey one of my favorite fucking tweets is someone posting a picture of like their plate of spaghetti And it just has sugar on top of it And then like someone cure Tina is like dude the doctor is gonna be rolling your toes like dice Sugar like on top of what the fuck yeah, it's not not like like mixed sauce like this board. No, it's good pasta

I swear my grandma made goulash as she would put a ton of sugar in that goulash goulash. Yeah, surely. It's parmesan on the top It's not I here. Look at this. Tell me that's parmesan It's fucking sugar. You can see the crystals. I mean, of course, they're gonna mix it but still that's so much sugar though The holy shit. No, it's foul. That's like someone pulled a bag. Look, it's got impact font on it. I'm honestly not going to lie. That's probably a little bit more sugar

than my grandma would put in her goulash. This is someone who heard like, you can add a little bit of sugar to like a sauce recipe. But they just poured it on the fucking spaghetti. And it looks so good without the sugar. What have they done to it? The only reason why you add sugar is for the fucking flavor triangle. Otherwise, like it's not to taste the sugar to get rid of the acidity.

The other the other next level version of like diabetic eats is the fucking honey bun burger, where it's like you place the buns on a burger like a cheese burger, fucking honey bun. No, a hundred percent. That's fire. That's so fucking good, dude. fucking honey bun. No, a hundred percent. That's fire. That's so fucking good, dude. Salty, sweet. No, a hundred percent. I'm I fuck with it. It doesn't matter.

It's the artery clogger right there. Who fucking cares? Once in a while, like one. It's a little it's a little taste. But Mike, I have to get your food opinion on this because I was looking it up. This is once a week. My grandpa would get me and my brother and myself one of these. Oh shit, that looks tasty.

Oh my God. That looks fucking, what is? That looks like gas. It's a pork tenderloin. And we would each get half a sandwich, me and my brother would, my grandpa would get one for himself. Yeah, big boys gotta eat.

Am I supposed to use like a sub roll for that? Holy shit. It was really good. It's like he just posted a sandwich and refuses to elaborate. The bun is like a third the size of the meat. It's a pork tenderloin and you can buy halves of the sandwich. Oh, it's just called that?

It's a pork tenderloin sandwich, yeah. Oh, that's fucking tasty. I'm getting really fucking hungry right now. Holy shit. Got me thinking about what we're going to bring. Bama Nose. Miss Sheena, what about you? What are your items?

My increase, the good ones, would probably be like a little very primitive MS Paint minigame where you draw a little picture for me and I smile and I dislike would probably be anything related to a lot most of this episode I love that I love that you're like affinity item you just described like a WarioWare minigame like I'm magic I'm drawing I look love that you're like affinity item. You just described like a Wario War mini game. Like I'm magic, I'm drawing, I look up and you just smile and it matches exactly the drawing. You know what my negative is? Racism. Oh!

Woo hoo! Good page, good page. Bless you, Cameron, honestly. How could you be so controversial yet so brave? I clapped to make sure that people knew that I agreed. Wow. 100 episode and we still got it. sure that people knew that I agreed. Brass, Cassandra Crash, Chipples, Chips, Chris Chapman, Devo, not the band, DX Studios, Edward McMillan, Eric Scott Gillies, Ethereal, Gif, Generic Phoenix, Guy Beam, Heretic Shark, Invictus Echo, J-Bird, Lomda Man, Leo the Geotech, Lucavia, Mr. Starchy, Mr. Shirt, Pharmacy Fruitbat, Philosophicool, Presta Husk, Rat Supreme, Spherical May, Sponge Guy, Synthetic Pacifist,

The Frost Ace, The Snaxolotl, Triddy Bird, Ulbert, Will9455, and Woodstock. Thanks so much for listening and I still can't believe we made it to 100. Thank you so much.