Please Stop Talking - oh noo (feat. Charlie) | Please Stop Talking

Episode Date: January 26, 2020

How much deeper can we dig this hole? Support the podcast and David on Patreon ▶ https://www.patreon.com/SirMeowMusic Check out our merch!  ▶ http://pleasestopshopping.com/ Join the PST Discord server! ▶ https://discord.gg/YNqTT65 Links: Avery ▶ https://twitter.com/ShammyTV David ▶ https://twitter.com/SirMeowMusic Ed ▶ https://twitter.com/PunkDuck_ Kyle ▶ https://twitter.com/SirZulu_ Charlie ▶ https://twitter.com/justtatertots Podcast ▶ https://twitter.com/PSTPodcast Podcast also available on Spotify and iTunes! iTunes ▶ https://goo.gl/X1C3nG Spotify ▶ https://goo.gl/fdVg9V Art by Boo_Rad13y: Twitter ▶ https://twitter.com/Boo_Rad13y Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I'm, like, so worried about my sister. Randy, you cannot marry a murderer. I was sick, but I am healed. Returning to W Network and Stack TV. The West Side Ripper is back. If you're not killing these people, then who is? That's what I want to know. Starring Kaley Cuoco and Chris Messina.

The only investigating I'm doing these days is who shit their pants. Killer messaged you yesterday? This is so dangerous. I gotta get out of this. Based on a true story. New season Mondays at 9 Eastern and Pacific. Only on W. Stream on Stack TV. Yo! Please Stop Talking is made possible with the support by our patrons.

If you want to support the channel and get cool rewards like naming an NPC for Folk and Dagger, having your name in the credits, or asking a question or hypothetical for the Q&A section of the podcast, why not consider donating? Check out the link in the description or patreon.com slash sirmeowmusic for more info. Everybody shut the fuck up. I'm going to play the fucking music now, okay? Welcome to the podcast. Okay, fuck it. That's the one. Let's go. Welcome to the podcast that's the one let's go welcome to the podcast everybody a very special episode of the podcast

oh are we going yeah we're really using that this is the casual Fridays of episodes where we just go through like our huge backlog of Patreon questions and answer them with five people on

and every single one of us is doing a moderately loud activity in the background. Yeah. Yeah, we're actually, it's like a mix of ASMR role play and just like answering questions. We're actually pioneers. Really not professional. This is one of the most postmodern podcasts you will ever listen to.

Punk duck ass. Hey, I've noticed that Cameron hasn't been on the podcast in a while. Is there any reason for that? Should we lead in by talking about that? PunkDuck will also answer the question at a surprising twist. Oh, what is it? Why isn't Cameron on the podcast ever? He sucks.

He sucks so fucking much. Oh my god. That's crazy. He's agreed to be on episodes like 15 times. And he also agreed to us shitting on him in case he doesn't make it. That's also crazy.

Wait, so does that mean Charlie is sexy Cameron or I'm sexy Cameron? Ooh, I mean Brendan is sexy Cameron. Is that a variant or a subspecies? Kyle, you can be... Kyle, you're straight Cameron. Charlie. Hey, I you can be... Kyle, you're straight, Cameron. Charlie, I'm straight too. No, you're gay dad. You're gay dad, Cameron.

Oh, yeah. Charlie, you can be gay dad, Cameron. I'll be gay dad, Cameron. But gay dads are definitely sexier than straight men, so... Exactly. Exactly. Even though I'm straight in real life. Oh, yeah. No, but we should actually... I want want to clarify Cameron agrees to come on the podcast constantly and then when it's time to record it just doesn't fucking show up and we have to scramble and find replacements and it

usually doesn't work because last minute last minute everyone's fucking busy because everyone we know has jobs yeah so anyways to move to on, we're going to just go through our entire backlog of Patreon questions. The entire backlog. Don't lie. The whole thing. No, no, no. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

I wanted to say we have a huge backlog. We're just going to go through a few to clear up a bunch. Are we going to explain who Charlie is? No. I need no introduction, A introduction avery's gay dad cameron he's already explained charlie listen the true fans of the podcast who have listened since day one will know exactly who i am oh my god i mean so threatening charlie is charlie is just the essence of gay dad honestly pretty much being near him just gives off an aura that's so fucking

gay and dad like with the way he dresses I think the last thing I was in was one of the advertisements no it was Charlie no he was in an ad read Kyle oh you're right I was in Charlie Clarification Hour and then the ad read, Kyle. Oh, you're right. You're right. Oh, yeah.

I remember clarification hour and then the ad read where I was the used car salesman or something. Yeah. And I went inside of my closet and yelled things for like 10 minutes. That was a good time. I remember I was in the closet, bro. I was I was holding the mic. That was. I definitely remember that. It was kind of weird that you were naked the whole time No

Shut up I wasn't naked Why is everybody so adamant about Making me sound gay I'm not fucking gay bro Is that the first question Is David gay No why is everybody so adamant about making David Sound gay

Anyways so yeah we're gonna go through the patreon questions basically when when people are in the ten dollar and above t oh no and now it's five dollar and above tiers right god i'm so fucking retarded inflation's fucked inflation is fucked it's going backwards stop you're gonna is that stop no no no no no someone say inflation bro no you that makes you sound like you have a fetish instead of just like oh god nobody else knows why that oh my god david cut out the part where you explain why that sounds bad to charlie no no cut straight from does anyone did anyone say inflation to ostentation asks what's the most badass way to come out to your parents kiss your dad on the mouth kiss your dad on the mouth

i saw that one i was just gonna say fuck your dad but you know start slow start start what's the question how to come out to your parents what's the most badass way to come out to your parents no no no kiss your stepdad Like the really homophobic one. Kiss your fucking uncle. And if you don't have a stepdad, kiss your mom and then you'll get one. Kiss your boyfriend's dad on the lips in front of your parents. Yeah, because then your dad will get mad jealous

and probably leave her. I don't know. Jesus fucking Christ. Is there a way that doesn't involve kissing? math what's wrong with kissing well i know nothing make it make it like a like a one of those high school prom piles is really tacky handholding kyle's all about i kiss all the time. It's not gay to lips touch regardless of sex. What about if the toes touch? I really hope that's not gay because

otherwise I got some explaining to do. You got a lot of explaining to do. I think we both do it. We're not talking about toes touching lips. Did we ever talk about this? Yeah, that's what I was going to ask. Did we ever talk about the incident?

I hope not. We can. This is supposed to be a Q&A episode, but go on. The toe incident? One of the questions is to tell a quick mini story. I'm not sure if we... I don't think we've had both of you on a podcast. What, me and David?

Well, not during that time I swear to god we talked about that one time you kept sucking my toes in a bathtub that's pretty much the whole story oh yeah no I remember we talked about that because we also talked about how you were Ahmad's first kiss oh right what what oh no yeah like

back then yeah anyways Magnus Melot waitllot before we move on yes um how did david's toes taste oh god uh probably like i'm gonna be honest i was fucking hammered i wouldn't be able to tell you i know they were hairy i definitely tasted some like follicles in there oh oh god that's more of a texture flavor thing pickled slightly pickled no it was not slightly pickled we were in a fucking bat of course we were in the my toes are not slightly pickled there was no vinegar uh magnus mellot shut the fuck up magnus mellot asks what are your preferred class race slash race to play in an mmo and or rpg um whoever can dual wield gamer i usually take the weird the

weird one like the weird race and try to play like either ranger or Rogue. Is this specifically for MMOs? MMO or D&D? Or, probably like RPGs. Like, shit that you can customize a character in. Yeah, gotcha. I don't know. I usually go for weird shit for builds, and if there's a race selector, I'll go for anything other than human,

because I play as a human in 99% of games. If there's a skeleton option, I always go skeleton. I will be a skeleton. Of course I want to be a fucking boner, bro. That's why I fucking love Divinity Original Sin 2, because playing as a skeleton actively makes the game harder

because every single NPC is just fucking scared of you. And you have to get an item that makes your face into a human face, because otherwise people will attack you on sight. I'm a big fan of playing as whatever race has big agility buffs because video games

are an escape and I'm one of the least agile people I know in the world. So usually like elves or elves. Usually it's like elves or Khajiit, right? Especially if there's like a weird elf like a purple one like the dark elves and world of warcraft big fan of that yeah yeah hell yeah

what about you kid kyle kid kyle i'm i'm normally go warrior ish type shit yeah that makes sense you go you go human warrior you go human warrior so fucking most of the time all right i'm trying to get better about it i recently started playing a rogue i want to play a wizard trying to branch out a bit more i'm new you're so vanilla i bet you were so uncomfortable when we were talking about toes and inflation earlier holy Holy crap. Kyle likes to play a class where it would be in character to name his character Kyle. Oh, God.

Alright. Bella Loves You asks, where can I buy my bath water from you guys? I read that exactly as it was written. PleaseStopShopping.com PleaseStopShopping.com I want to branch off from that question. bathwater from you guys now I read that exactly okay please stop shopping calm but in my like this is I would like to say that question she said where can I buy Matt my bathwater from you guys and unfortunately we're all out of your bathwater it's it's been so hard to send it to I mean you can send it to wait I

can drop my address here though hey if you're a $50 patron you can send it to wait I can drop my address here hey if you're a $50 patron you can have my address oh shit bro I want to pivot from that question I want to ask who do you guys think would be the most likely to start selling their bath water on the podcast first

David David no I don't think so water on the podcast first are you kidding me david david guests included it's still david and no no i don't think so david would also be very likely to start selling my bath water because no no cameron would start selling it and then not send them like he'd be like nah i forgot to package it what were you saying because when you put I don't know if it's still up there but the one of the things you could buy on PST

you can't do that anymore you can't do that anymore I could add them back probably I mean I'm not I did just quit my job so bro you want to be handcuffed for a week and film it, bro?

Bro. I forgot about that. Bro. Bro. Wait till someone gives you guys money first, please. Nah. Oh, that's right, the money, the money, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, right, right, right, right, right, right. Indeed, showing's gonna be so weird. Anyways, next

question. Fred Barry asks asks what would you say your favorite story that hasn't been told on pst is okay so to get away with this one i think we don't say whose story it is but we say what the story is so no one's culpable for crimes mine is the arson story we're all doing the same story too that's the funny part oh mine's the document forgery story. It's definitely Fight Club. Fight Club's pretty good. Fight Club is really good.

One day, one day. Yeah, one day. Wait, didn't we make a goal to release that episode or something? Yeah, 50k subs. What's funny is that we've told so many worse stories on the podcast that it's going to be so underwhelming. I know. Back then, it was like, whoa. many worse stories on the podcast now i know that it's gonna be so underwhelming i know back then back then it was like whoa can we do the arson story for 50k whoever's story that is

come on i oh i don't know what we're talking about guys charlie do you have a story that hasn't been told on the podcast that you think is great that won't ever be told on the podcast um and most stories from when i was a pledge at a fraternity oh i know a couple oh i also know a couple i think charlie forgot that i know a couple yep i sure did. That's the only one here I think who knows about the... What? I have the secrets.

What the fuck, bro? David might know. I feel like you told me a few when you were visiting me and we were really hammered. I definitely told you a few, but there's one in particular. Oh, yeah. Alright, what have you a few, but there's one in particular. Oh, yeah. Alright, but what if you told it, though?

Nope. There's literally no one. Oh, shit. But it involves eggs. Ooh. Let's call it an egg story. Honestly, Charlie, it's almost worse to let people make it up in their heads. Charlie, if we get 200k subs, will we get

the egg story? God, you guys are are missing out the egg story is fucking fantastic big dong daddy dom asks oh that's my favorite to everyone what are some games that you like that everyone else hates kingdom hearts yeah that's probably the best answer do I have one? I think I have one let me see actually Bulletstorm it feels like everybody hates Bulletstorm but I don't know anyone who hates Bulletstorm wow I forgot about that game

but I do like it I mean I don't know anyone who hates Bulletstorm I don't like it but it feels like everybody in this chat hates it. My favorite game is the promotional, very boring FPS that they released as marketing material for Bulletstorm. For Bulletstorm!

Wow, dude! That's my favorite game. That just fucking threw me back. When you kill somebody and the narrator goes, bloody scream, so real. Oh, what was it master sergeant murder person

it was called duty calls yeah duty calls yeah that shit was sick I made a fucking let's play of that when I was a kid this one isn't really people hate it but everyone I've talked to says that they don't like it the strider reboot in like 2016

I love that game people hate it I just clarified saying that people don't like it. The Strider reboot in like 2016. I love that game. What? People hate it? I just clarified saying that people don't hate it. Every time I mention it, they go, I didn't like it. Huh, weird. I kind of liked it. I really like it. I've replayed it like three times. Really? Holy shit.

I really like Metroidvania. Yes, Overwatch counts. Okay, cool. Kyle, you don't like Overwatch. You want to just hold it. Does Overwatch count now? I really like Metroidvanias. Yes, Overwatch counts. Yes, okay, cool. Sick. Kyle, you don't like Overwatch. You want to just hold it. Avery? What?

So what if I haven't played it in like two years? Wait, actually, I have a better one. It's not really that people hate it. Oh, I guess mine's Paladins. No, I have one. It's not really that people hate it. Just people, like, barely anyone played it. For me, it's not really that people hate it just people like barely anyone played it for me it's the Witcher 3

oh I mean honestly though if we're doing the opposite question where it's like a game that you don't like that everybody likes Zelda really I mean that's fair but for me it's it probably

would be the oh wait no it's divinity people hate me for saying that I don't like Divinity. People want to fucking kill me. I don't know why. That's fine. Divinity is like a lot of writing, a lot of reading. Brain hurdy. Mine for that would be Rocket League.

I hate Rocket League. Oh, okay. I understand that. That's why I have... Game that I don't like that everyone else likes? Sure. Rainbow Six Siege oh yeah that'll be that's yeah Rainbow Six Siege is mine

because I had the worst fucking first impression of that game like I had the worst first experience of that game that could ever exist and uh very bad I'll talk to you about it later it killed his entire family. It got my sister.

Did a Ubisoft representative come into your house and fucking rap rap? While doing the peak side to side and crouch walking? Your boy Will asks if there were humans that were specifically raised to be

consumed and were kept in pretty good condition would you eat this parenthetically i know that avery mentioned this question in episode 39 but he didn't say if he would you can't evade the press avery i would not it's part it's part of it's part of journalism. You're saying if children were groomed and bred to be eaten. I don't like to use the word groomed there. I mean I wouldn't do it because I wouldn't eat a person so I guess I don't mind that you made it sound

awful. Even if I was starving? Like okay different. If I'm sure I was on a long road trip and I was really hungry and there was like only children like i'm not starving i'm on a train like i'm on a train and then a lady comes by with some snacks and she goes going m&ms or a kid's finger is that is this like yeah that's where we're at it's like the trolley from Harry Potter I have M&M's I have Skittles I have fingertips

I'd probably go with the Skittles but I would try the fingers I mean it depends are they seasoned or are they just like a fucking finger if that's your fucking hang up David shut the fuck up is this a valid question

are they seasoned or not it's not a question of morality at all okay okay okay i will say i like you know the little sausages that come around but it wouldn't be like a beefy yeah no no okay look i would if i had to eat human i would rather eat seasoned human it does affect how much I... I don't want to eat either of these things. But if it was unseasoned human, I want to eat less. Charlie, let's say you're on a road trip, you pull into a gas station, you see some Slim Jameses.

Are you going to buy them? That's the human meat variant of a Slim James. A Slim James. But what if it's not like a jerky, though? What if it's like Gordon Ramsay prepares one meal? I'm not eating human meat. Okay, but the thing is, in a world where... The secret way to get the fourth Michelin star is to serve.

David, we live in a world where pigs are raised to be eaten, and they're kept in relatively good conditions, and I don't eat pigs! Okay, but you're different. I eat pig. I can eat a fucking child. I'm explaining why you... Ripped to those pigs, but I'm different.

Listen, listen, listen. In a world where it's not morally wrong to do so, I might eat a fucking child's finger. You can't say in a world where it's not morally wrong. The question is whether or not this is morally sanctionable, even if it existed. I'm not going to start talking about philosophy I mean I don't know man if you put a fucking if you fucking all dress

that shit all dressed fucking child finger I might fucking I might fucking have a nibble I think that was one of the greatest quotes that I've heard on this podcast lately what? just David saying in a world where it's not morally wrong I might eat a child's finger.

Of course you go for a child, David. Very on brand. But I'm different. The question was children. No, the question was people. Human consumption. I was thinking like... You guys got real fixated on eating children,

you fucking freaks. It's still a person. I only want boy veal. Fatten him up. He had to have been a gamer. I'd be really into that certified A5 wagyu person. Wagyu

more like manu. Hang on a second. Is there a picture of the person's face on the packaging? Oh, no. Oh, no. That's a different fucking that's this boy oh suddenly suddenly now that it's a person it's a problem okay if i see the pig's face i'm gonna cry when i eat i'm not if no if if i mean that would probably make me want to eat it more because I'd walk up to the grocery store and peruse the refrigerators and be like, damn,

shouty, okay, and I'd buy that veal. You know? Who needs marbling when, you know, shouty fine as hell? Yeah. Yeah, okay, so if we were all eating people,

would you eat hot people or ugly people? Hot people, are you kidding me? I don't think it matters. I mean, no. You underestimate capitalism, Ed. Oh, I'm not. Don't get me started on capitalism. Fugly voice.

Hot people probably taste better, right? It's like the skin's softer. What does that mean? What is the line of reasoning there? I mean, hot people are probably in good physical shape and but the thing is that meat probably don't got good marbling but they're hot you know it's so the meat is worse but you're like i'm eating a sexy motherfucker right now do we go for flavor or the attractiveness of the person that i think the attractiveness is only a factor if you're eating the face, right? Like, could you ginger beef it?

Could you ginger beef a fucking child's finger? We're spending so long on this question. If we talk about this for too long, David's going to start talking about human Vienna sausages, and I don't want that. Next question, please, God. Here's one talking about hot children. I didn't eat about...

Bro, you fixated on children there. David, you are the one who fixated on children. It probably tastes softer. I don't know. Oh, boy. You would know, wouldn't you? I mean, who knows? Maybe puberty affects the flavor, you know?

I was going for... I was going for like... You know how veal is... David, cut any of that and you're fired. Okay, next question. God, please move on. It made sense in my head. It made sense in my head. It made sense in my head

as the ending. Listen, the tasty kid fingers made sense in my head. Oh, so soft. If you were allowed, Rasmus Gran Lupu asks Rasmus Gran Lupu

asks if you were allowed to choose an afterlife which would you choose and why? Shit like becoming a ghost, heaven, hell, reincarnation or some other theory of the afterlife Okay so Rasmus Gran Lupu also asked the question You all get isekai'd to the world of your choosing where do you end up

and what will you do and I'm not going to lie when you started reading that question I found that one I was like wow David's really embellishing this to sound less gay oh let's mix both let's mix both I want to fucking get isekai'd when I die so it's pretty much

the same question. I mean, basically, it's just reincarnation. Oh, David, are you going to get reincarnated as a fucking Kingdom Hearts character? Oh my god. Can that happen? Can I be fucking... Can I be Sora's best friend, bro? Who's that again?

Rosaka or some bullshit? What? Oh, Roxas. That's the one. I would want to get isekai'd. You? No, Roxas. That's the one. No, Roxas. You fucking retard. Roxas is Sora. We're not doing this. Roxas is Sora. We're not doing this.

We're not talking about Kingdom Hearts. I would want to get Isekai probably into the world of Warhammer 40k because I hate myself. Are you such a cool space marine? I mean, that's fucking metal as shit. No no you just die in the trenches he wouldn't be metal at all oh you oh you wouldn't be like big you don't get to choose that you're a main character david like you're just some guy in the kingdom hearts universe charlie would oh wait no i'll get he's tied into some guy the movie with r Movie with Ryan Reynolds where he's an NPC. Oh, Free Guy.

Why isn't it called Some Guy? That would have been so much better. Some Guy would have been a lot better, yeah. Yeah. What about you, Kyle? I don't know. Some Guy the Movie. Kyle has so many lives

he would rather be living. Oh, God. Yeah, no, that's my answer. Free guy. Get isekai'd into smite car. You too? Honestly, that would be fun. We could just like all isekai

into fucking smite car and have a blast karting all the time. Struggling on that one. Playing smite car for eternity? For eternity? Is this hell? For me, it's Tuesday.

Oh, God. Has Kyle decided what he'd be isekai'd into not at all dude i don't know but let's go with master chief again yeah i'll just go halo isekai'd into master chief yeah i want to be an odst get all up inside i want to be an odst it'd be so fucking cool to die falling into orbit. Burning up in the atmosphere. So fucking cool. My helmet's sick. Why was the ODSD so awesome? I want that lifestyle. Aaron Johnston asked,

What's the most entitled fanbase that you're a part of? Who the fuck puts a T in there? Yeah, go on. JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Entitled? Yes. You're a part of. Who the fuck puts a T in there? Yeah, go on. JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Entitled? Yes. You're a Smash fan. I like the games. I don't follow the fandom aggressively and I don't check the subreddits. I feel like that would mean being part of the fandom. I just like the

games and I play them sometimes. That's fair. Yeah, probably JoJo's. Any fucking tweet in the official account post, where's Part 6? Where's Purple Haze feedback? Nobody likes Rohan. Oh, no, no.

Wait, we're talking Most Entitled Fanbase? Kingdom Hearts. No, Pokemon. For you it'd be Pokemon. For you it's Pokemon, yeah. I forgot you like Pokemon. It is Pokemon all the way. i forgot you like pokemon all the way i forgot i forgot you like bad temtem i can't believe there

was a cursor in that presentation game freak more like game shit dude i miss the console wars when xbox fans and ps4 fans would use the insults like sony pony and x shit or something and wii u would be like piss balls he was pissing itself in the corner Oh, man. Those were the days. I would say, just in terms of, like,

how desperate they are to have everyone listen to them, the most entitled fanbase that I'm a part of is Egonomics. Egonomnon? Egonomics. Egonomnon. The Egonomnon fandom. Big fan of Egonomics over here. Look, Egonomnon is really...

I really like the idea of economics being a fandom. That's really fucking funny. As someone who is plugged into economics Twitter, it absolutely is. Fan-dom. I get used to kiting to Wall Street. Does North American League of Legends count? Sure.

Why not? I guess. I wouldn't know. Are they entitled? It feels like it. That's good enough for me. Is it gayer to... John Chapman asks...

John Chapman asks John Chapman asks Is it gayer to suck one dick 20 times Or 20 different dicks One dick 20 times that's just love 20 different dicks Yeah that's what I was gonna say That's just fucking bromance 20 different dicks

That's being a slut bro If you suck one dick 20 times You're a bro If you suck one dick 20 times, you're a bro. If you suck 20 dicks once, you're an influencer. Okay, I guess let's move on to another question. You crushed that, Jesus. In the future, there are no sexual orientations. There's just bro and influencer.

Two genders. Thank you, Cyberpunk. What's the worst thing you... Sorry, John Chapman also asks, what's the worst thing you ever got in trouble for as a kid? Below 18, let's make it fun. I was going to say... Fuck you and forgery.

It's usually not a good sign when someone puts in parentheses in any context, below 18, let's make it's usually not a good sign when someone puts in parentheses in any context below 18 let's make it fun i mean if i'm honest i mean still still still still i would say in terms of how scared i was of how much trouble i would get in at the time. One time me and my friend, when we were probably about eight years old, were like messing around and he was pounding on a door and he broke a window and we considered running

away from home for about two hours like figuring out how we were going to leave home and never come back. I've done that. Getting in trouble for breaking a window. How hard do you have to pound on a door to break a window? Not very hard, apparently, if an 8-year-old can do it. You're fucking... Probably shitty glass.

Maybe your friend was a buff-ass 8-year-old. I don't know. Why are you talking about buff 8-year-olds? Below 18. Let's make it fun. How would buff 8-year-olds taste? Someone please tell me. Not nearly as soft as the standard 8-year-old. the flavor is lagging he's so tender this is gonna fucking

follow me until I die God the idea I'm having so much fun other Cameron isn't here. Yeah, that's great. Cameron would eat a child. So would you! What? No, I never said I would eat him. You literally did! You said it multiple times! That's what the argument was about! But you fixated like you absolutely need to.

No, I wouldn't. Yeah, it was like want versus need disappeared to you your basic financing skills vanished not eating a child didn't really cross your mind when answering that question

you did not David out here has another tab open where he's investing in mini Slim Jameses in a world where it's investing in mini Slim Jameses. It's because in a world where it's not morally wrong to do so, I mean... That's not what... The question was despite that. Despite it being not morally wrong, would you still do it?

It's not that it's not morally wrong. It's that it's an industry that exists and is available. It's a question of morality. It doesn't start by saying it's not morally wrong. It's saying, do you think it's moral? No, I would absolutely eat a kid. It's probably morally okay. What do you mean if it's being done it's probably

okay? Do you live in the world? I don't live in a world! I don't live in a world! I live in a fucking society! Look, if all your friends were eating Slim Jameses, would you eat one too? No. No. Well, Avery wouldn't because he doesn't eat pig

and we all eat pig. Honestly, it's more messed up to eat pig than it is to eat people because when pigs have sex, they come for like 15 hours. That's so much joy to have in the world. That's just so much research material. Yeah, this is way more research material

than I ever thought. Why aren't we funding this? Pigs are to Charlie, but children are to David. Shut the fuck up. Oh my god. My fucking god. I don't like pigs that much.

Who asked that question? Who was the first to ask that question? I don't remember. that much who asked that question? who was the first to ask that question? I don't remember it's been so far away he had like a really normal name oh weird his name's Slim James okay so okay so Hazarazu asks

if any of you could go back in time and prevent anything what would it be and why? I would go back in time and not anything, what would it be and why? I would go back in time and not say what I fucking said. About child eating. I don't know if I can prevent David from preventing himself from saying these things.

It would become... It's like Terminator. It becomes a time war. You can't just fucking time war me, you motherfucker. That's not how this question works. David's human being of sausages are the John Conner of the podcast. I would

go back in time and prevent Charlie from preventing David from going back in time and stopping himself from saying what he said out of spite. Are the pigs Kyle Reese? I suppose. I just watched Terminator Salvation last night. No, actually, Salvation last night. Ew.

I'm kind of... No, actually, Salvation is okay. Salvation sucks. You guys are crazy. Salvation's awful. Yeah, well, you have standards when you watch movies, okay? True. And Spamman versus Superman, not that bad.

No, Salvation is okay. Oh, boy. I said it. I'm saying Salvation is okay in relation to Genesis existing. Salvation and Genesis are about as good as each other. Nope. For different reasons. Salvation is absolutely garbage.

Fred Berry asks, if you could press a button and have Canada become a US state, would you press it? Shut the fuck up. Charlie's talking. I guess I'll just go fuck myself, Ed. I'm sorry. I'm just a big Sam Worthington fan. I don't like him getting shit-talked. How can you like Sam Worthington and not like John Cornyn?

The Sam Worthington of equips. He killed Zeus. Sam Worthington asks, why do you hate me? Exactly. Fred Barry asks, if you could press a button and have Canada become a U.S. state, would you press it? And if so, why do you hate me? Exactly. Fred Barry asks, if you could press a button and have Canada become a US state, would you press it? And if so, why? Yes, for obvious reasons. Why?

The fuck obvious reasons? Because America is bad. And not America works. That's going to be great for the podcast listeners. How many of them were American? No, just Charlie going straight into the mic for the funny but blowing out the microphone joke. Oh, right.

David fixed that. David hit the fix button. Yeah, I'll hit the fix button. David, add reverb to that. I'll add the fucking cantina music behind it. Dreams of Ice asks, what kind of horror movie would you direct given the chance the scary one a doctor strange movie wait what happened sorry

what kind of horror movie would you direct if given the chance a parody one because i can't handle real horror movies and making one would i would be too scared oh i'd like to make i'd like to make something really fucking... Like a horror comedy, probably. Something really fucking weird. Just like a concept that makes no goddamn sense, but have the horror bits really fucking horrific. Probably a lot of body horror,

because I like that a lot. Like reanimator shit. Like eating boy fingers? Yeah, I'd probably make it about fucking a world where it's okay to eat children and this character you have to be scared of your own movie it's a horror movie this character right his name is

his name is the wait give him some time he's gonna yes and himself into something brilliant the way that way his name is the way tramby and the way tramby is going hey david what country is that way tramby from uh french canada no relation with me and he's going. And he's going to save the world.

Next question. Last question, brother? I haven't picked one yet, but yeah, go on. Sorry. Oh, well, you interrupted other people in the middle of saying their questions. Sorry. Kyle, do you want the last one?

Kyle, be quiet. Ed wants to talk about Sam Worthington no it's very pressing alright Cameron asks how do you guys feel about Sam Worthington

finally a question for me I'm glad you asked oh okay Leo Campbell asks the war is over and we lost. What fucked up things would you do to survive in the brave new world?

Eat children. Raise children for Ed to eat. Fucking finish the podcast. I'm fucking done. Live in Avery's children farm. I think it'd be called Deway Tramby's Kid Fingers. Deway Tramby's Kid Fingers Deway Tramby's Kid Bits

Deway Kid Bits Oh fuck off Wait I just want to do One more question Okay go ahead And plus I already said His name so he's gonna Or her name

Dax Richie asks If you could invent a drug What would it do And what would you name it so he's gonna... Or her name. Dax Richie asks, if you could invent a drug, what would it do, and what would you name it? I'm not gonna make a pedophile joke. I won't do it. It would get me really high. Damn it, I was supporting a pedophile joke. I was gonna say it would work like Paper Moon King

from JoJo Part 8, but I just see children's faces constantly. So, Ed, now you've posed another moral quandary. If you're attracted to kids and you just see a child's face on an adult's body due to a drug and you have sex with them, is that amoral? Well, no, because at the end of the day,

you have sex with a consenting adult. Avery, are you selling? No, because at the end of the day, that's actually a consenting adult. This is the... Avery, are you selling? I don't fucking know what kind of pill I would make. Time reversal pill? Uh, yeah, time reversal pill, probably. Call it time... A pill that removes morality from people?

Jesus Christ! Oh, my God. Oh, brave new world! Um... I would take a pill that makes people's... Make a pill that makes people's fingers look real tasty. I do the same thing, but for toes. I don't need pills for that.

I don't need pills for that. I don't need pills for that. Alright. I would just like to... Can I read out a question that we don't need to actually answer? I just think it's a funny question. Go for it, sure. Flower of Eden asks, tell a quick mini-story that's funny

slash weird, but not really worthy for the podcast normally. So it's basically, do you have any stories that are not funny enough to have on the podcast? Can you put them on the podcast? I mean, David's done that. Get fucked, Charlie. Remember Beaver?

Well, next time I want to make a joke, I'll go fuck Beaver. Leave Beaver alone. I saw beaver yeah maybe maybe maybe i shouldn't goof on your patrons no you're fine we goof on them all the time it's fine they're the ones paying for the for the yeah they're the yeah that's yeah that's true they probably want us to eat their fingers they don't have to send me your finger don't say that don't say that the fuck i'm kidding but don't even say it but don't even say it david can i guys welcome to the pst episode that's actually the lead-in to a thriller movie that's

coming out this fall the sequel to pst going to be a fucking crime podcast, true crime podcast. We're trying to figure out whether or not David is innocent. What? Innocent of what? I don't know, David. Use your imagination. Well, that's not fair. I have like a body, I have like a fucking body

double somewhere doing crimes. I can't, like, that's not fair. It'd be so funny if David got accused of a crime and it turns out it was other David. And FBI agents had to listen to this podcast. All this children killing

just reminded me of... I have a quick story I can tell then. That's not funny enough. Speaking of murdering children... It's similar but are you guys familiar with Maddie McCann yes oh my god what the fuck are we about

to start talking about I made like a joke about Maddie McCann in like a really really old video like I'm talking like I was 14 and I made a Maddie McCann joke but like back then only British people knew about her so I just got a bunch of people going like oh oh mate, I was fucked up. And I remember reading those comments and laughing and imagining the accents.

That's the story. That's honestly a pretty good story. Sorry, fuck. That's Beaver Tear, but it didn't take 15 minutes. I mean, the guy asked for Beaver Tear stories. I delivered. I love that we have different words for what a story is. It's like there's Kyle stories, there's Cameron stories, and there's Beaver stories.

Cameron stories are sick, but he won't tell them. I know. It's infuriating. Guess who had the fight club? Thanks so much for the support and I'm really sorry you had to hear that.