Plumbing the Death Star - Could You Handle Seeing Two Dogs Eat Spaghetti à la Lady and the Tramp?

Episode Date: March 3, 2024

Your favourite boys cannot believe their eyes! Did they just see two dogs on a date? A full on romantic evening? Slurping up spaghetti with human lips?? Surely not! But if they did, how will this affect their world view or will it simply wash over them like spaghetti off a duck's back? Listen in dear listener as Jackson regals us with an interrupted retelling of Lady and the Tramp while the Joels have a lot of beaver questions and horrible stories to tell. We recommend skipping from about 25:41 to about 34:35. For your health.Links to everything in our linktr.ee including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ahem, ahem. You're listening to the Sandspant Network. Hey everyone and welcome to this week's episode of Plumbing the Death Star. I'm Joel. I'm Jackson. And I'm also Joel. And Plumbing the Death Star is a pop culture comedy podcast that asks the important questions like, could you handle seeing two dogs eat spaghetti a la Lady and the Tramp.

So I watched Lady and the Tramp on the weekend. Yep. Happy weekend. TGIF, am I right, fellas? TGIW, thank God it's weekend. Hey, brother, TGIW. You it's weekend hey brother TGIW you know what they say thank god

thank god it's weekend thank god it's weekend yes so and I came away with some so obviously there's the famous scene in Lady and the Tramp yeah

where Lady the dog from a house and Tramp the dog from a street they share a delicious bowl of spaghetti at the back of an Italian restaurant

I'm gonna ask named Tony's. Is it just Titanic? Is it just like the thing, it's like, oh, rich family and poor family, they never meet together. Do you want the premise of Lady and the Tramp? Let me give you a quick rundown of the plot. Lady is a dog. Shut up!

What's Tramp? Also a dog. Lady is a dog and she lives in a very fancy house with two owners. One day she gets a collar. This is very exciting. And she gets, they register her. She shows off her collar. She's very happy.

She loves being a dog. She loves being a dog. She loves her owners. She's having a wonderful time. She loves having a collar. She loves being owned by a beautiful family. Does Lady and the Tramp have a bad cat or a very problematic

cat? Brother, it's quite a problematic movie. There's a lot. Any race you could think of. Let me put it this way. On Disney+, Lady and the Tramp opens with an unskippable 15 second thing where they're like, hey, some of this is not so awesome. It's awesome that you know it's unskippable

because you tried to skip it. No, I just see that it comes up. I know for a fact that you want to be like, 15 seconds! Get me out of here! I've read it! Anyway, so Lady... But then something strange happens in the family.

She can't understand it. Her owners don't care for her so much anymore. They don't want to go on a walk. What's happened is that her owners have become with child. Now, lady doesn't know what's going on. My guess was going to be they got divorced. No.

But they're with child. They're with child. Now, Tramp, he lives in a barrel by the train tracks. And he's a sort of... Living your dream. He is living my dream. He's a sort of scumbag dog he kind of fucks around

yeah you know does he eat sausages well he steals sausages no no you would think so he wakes up in the morning

one day and he's like what am I gonna eat for fucking breakfast yeah and he looks around at all the stores and he's like

I could go to DeMarco's get a fucking sandwich nah oh what if I went down get some french pastries nah oh Tony's haven't down get some French pastries nah oh Tony's

haven't been there in a while then he goes out the back and a guy an Italian guy's like hey it's Butch I think they call him and they give him a bone so he's

he's just he's like knows everyone yeah he's a man about town he's less about he doesn't have say two owners the street owns exactly

exactly he belongs to the street yeah side note how good is it if you found out that someone was calling you a man about town? Oh, my

God, dude. Yeah. My God, Jackson Bailey, man about town? Yeah. I think that I know myself so well that if somebody said that, I would be like, they're talking about a different guy. Jackson Bailey, man about town. You have been misinformed about what I do. Not about you, maybe.

Jackson Bailey, man about you. I think you have to have a level of wealth to do that or a level of nepotism. But the tramps are man about town. That's true. I feel like maybe in this day and age, though.

You've just got to be a guy. You've got to be just like a guy that's out there. It's that guy. He's mad about town. What would he have to do for you to call him mad about town? Give me like three activities. I think he's got to be, he's got to have a, it doesn't have to be a daily, but I would say a weekly routine. Okay. That involves interacting with the same people over and over again.

Possibly he should have multiple smaller jobs that all feel like schemes. Oh, yeah, he can. Yeah. He could also be a man that just gets a haircut once a week. Yeah, that's true. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. That's true.

That's a weak haircut. That's rich. I would say, like, a force of personality to, like, or wearing a notable clothing. Yeah, okay. Maybe a hat. Like, constantly wears a hat. He gets a haircut once a week only to then put on a hat.

I love that about him. hat okay what makes it special it would need a haircut and he wears a hat it would need to be a very like special hat like a top hat like you one year if you were driving around or walking around you'd notice the guy's hat it couldn't just be like you know driving around you see him in that hat you say there's a man about town and then he goes into the hairdresser. He goes multiple places, he gets his haircut, and he wears a hat. Man about to hang out. I reckon he has to go to the coffee shop every day and order the same thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

What's his order? It could be anything. Again, it needs to be notable. If he gets an espresso and a cheese toastie. No, because the hat's already doing that. Oh, okay. The hat's doing what? No, but if the hat's doing it and he comes in and orders, yes, an espresso and a cheese toastie, I'm like, oh, he's all hat.

Yeah, it's all hat. It's all hat. 90% of his deal. Yeah, 90% of this guy is the hat. Yeah. He's not living life up to, like, he's not living large. Yeah. What if it's like a double black?

Not a double black. A double black latte and a croissant. No, I was going to say, what if it's like a double black? Not a double black. A double black latte and a croissant. No, I was going to say, what if it's like a long black and maybe it's a croissant hold the tomato? Oh, okay. If you're throwing in a hold or a with, is that enough? Croissant. Can I get a long black with two sugars? Oh, man, bad town.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Can I get a long black with some cold water? I would accept a long black with sugar and say a caramel slice. Oh, what about, I think this is real Man About Town energy, milk on the side. Long black milk on the side. Well, that's a Man About Town. Are you getting a haircut later?

Yeah. I was going to say, I love the hat. Anyway, so the tramp, so lady, they have the baby. And she's like, the baby's chill. And they're like, oh the tramp so lady they have the baby and she's like the baby's chill and they're like oh now that we've had the baby we can give you attention again

but who should come on the scene but this mean old aunt who has two racist kittens or cats they're just cats is it Siamese cats? yes they're Siamese

if you please and I do please they think this is a wonderful domicile and thinking maybe that they will stay a while. Yeah, awesome. It's a quite intense scene. And I'm fairly certain, if memory serves me correctly,

they don't actually quite like Lady staying there. They are very rude to Lady, and they get Lady in such a situation where it looks like, to this aunt who hates dogs, as though Lady has attacked the baby. Actually, Lady is trying to get a rat. There's a lot in this movie about how rats are trying to kill babies all the time. That's awesome.

I don't know if that was a problem in the 50s. I think historically, yes, that was a problem. Okay, thank God. Because it comes up multiple times. You don't want your baby to have rat bites. It involves a rat trying to eat a baby. You personally don't want to have rat bites. Let me tell you.

What's going to happen to me, pussy? As a human, getting bitten by a rat is no good. That's how we got the plague the first time. And it's how we'll get the plague the second time, when you get bitten by a rat. You right now, patient zero. Mark my words. You'll be patient zero for something.

Oh, yeah. You're mad about town energy or patient zero energy? I've got heaps of patient zero energy. Anyway, so then lady, the aunt puts her outside, yells at her, lady runs away. Yeah. Now she's on the street. What's she going to do? Tramp finds her.

He teaches her how to live, a laid back. I think, though, maybe you're forgetting a very important thing. When she does run away but her beloved collar oh that's her her beloved collar gets torn off gets stuck in a fence

it gets stuck in a fence now she's naked the day she was born hanging out with the tramp they have a wonderful night a bella note as the song sings this is a night

a wonderful night they call it bella note and it's at this point that they well first they visit the zoo and we learn some interesting stuff that I think is going to be relevant to the question. First things first,

they go to the zoo because they need, a lady's got a muzzle put on her. Yeah. They need to get rid of the muzzle. And they're like, we need somebody, we, we're dogs.

We can't do this. Yeah. We don't have thumbs. We don't have fucking thumbs. What are we going to do? Lady's like, let's chat to the apes. And Tramp says,

no, too close to humans. They won't understand us. Then they go talk to an alligator and the alligator talks without moving its mouth. It's really scary. They're like, alligator, can you help us? And he goes, and he doesn't close his mouth. And this horrible echoey voice is like, I'm closer.

And then they run away from the alligator. And in the end, a beaver helps them out. How does a beaver get the muzzle off? Give me a little pause. So they go to the beaver. Yeah. And the beaver's got this log. Yeah.

He's trying to build a dam. Yeah. Because he's a fucking beaver. Yeah, dude. Beavers love to build dams. But he's one beaver. I don't know what the other beavers are. Yeah.

And so he's got this huge log. That's what I love about beavers. Have you ever seen that, like, I guess it's like on YouTube, maybe, where someone was just like, I tried to rescue a beaver and unfortunately this beaver it loved to build and it loved to gnaw so anything where there's like the potential of running water or anything like drywall where there's like studs behind like just choose through it tries to like damn up a bath god it seems like ruined a house i've seen a video where it's just like he's grabbed a bunch of shit, like pillows, kids' toys, and he

just builds a dam in the hallway. I think it's because if a beaver hears running water, like biologically something in their head is like, build a dam! Build that dam. Great way to torture a beaver. Why does a beaver need to build a dam? I don't know. Put their babies in there? Evolutionary. It's like, you gotta

build a dam. Gotta build a dam, baby. But know. Put their babies in there? Evolutionary? It's like, you gotta build a dam. You gotta build a dam, baby. But why? The proto-beavers are only, like, making sweet love to the choicest dam builders out there. Yeah, yeah. So then eventually, for some reason... Why do they... So, why... Beavers are biologically

evolutionary design. In their brain, there's a bit of their brain dedicated to yelling at them to build a nest. That's like a fucking... You know, when that thing ticks over for like, oh,

you're biological, you're a cluck of chicken, and then like, oh, you know, or something has clicked, like, oh,

I want to have a family. For beaver, it's like, gotta build a nest. Must build a nest right now. I think it makes sense if you think about it like a nest.

A bird will get in their head at some point, yeah, brother, build a nest. And just for a beaver will get in their head at some point. Yeah, a brother built a nest. For a beaver, it's bigger and far less convenient. Yeah, for a bird, it's like... What do they use the dams for, though?

It's like a house. Okay. It'll be like 40 beavers living in a big dam. Yeah, and blocks of river. Yeah, which has got to be so fucking annoying if you're a fish or something. I'm dead now. A bird is kind of like, well, I've got to either build a nest to impress some lady friends, and then they'll fuck me.

Or I've got to build a nest to house my babies. Look after the babies. Where a beaver might just be like, build dam! Must build dam. Don't know why. Build dam for the fellas. Is this true? Probably not.

But have we seen, has it been recorded where beavers technically charge rent? Could you elaborate for the rest of us? So I think it's been maybe where they've seen these things where a beaver has a beautiful dam. And then another animal will come in and they're like, hello. Hi, Mr. And Mrs. Beaver. Could I please use your dam? And then the beaver is like, yes, you may. And I don't know if the beaver is like, you can do this if you give me food.

Or the other animal is like, thank you for letting me use the dam. Here is some food. But it feels like that they're charging. Do you know what other animal it is? Like a snake or something? I don't think it's a snake. I feel like a snake would eat the beaver. I feel like a snake would be like, can I come and live in your house for no reason?

Okay, snake, you seem like a cool guy. How delicious are you and your babies? Do we have 40 beavers or 38? Hey, we got this new guy that's shaped like two beavers. He's actually shaped more like a line with two beavers in him, actually. Like a beaver outline. Where'd the other beavers go? I don't know, dude.

You go look at that part of the dam, I'll look at this part. Yeah, I'll go search with, I'll take your firstborn. Okay, dude. He seems like a trustworthy guy. Yeah, he's a chill guy. He's chill and he's long, which I like. Yeah, I just want to give your kids a long hug. Okay, that seems nice.

Maybe we hide inside the snake. Safest place. Did the angry beavers live in a dam? No, they lived in a house. Did they like dams? I don't know. Norbert and Dagbert? Yeah.

Were they actually angry? They were furious. Yeah, they were pissed off. I always associate the one without the hair being angry. One of them was definitely angry. And the other one's like a chill Jeff Daniels-esque dumb and dumber guy. Yeah, I think it was. It was kind of one angry beaver. Well, I want to say it was some sort of like either like a mouse or something of like that size and maybe it was Like especially in times where it's like flooding problems and like, hey, can we use your name?

Maybe. I've got no idea. Here's another thing about beavers I'm not sure is true. Yes? That sometimes their big front teeth get rusty because they have, because they're so strong, they have like a build up of iron in them and sometimes you get rusty beaver teeth.

These are our beaver questions. Yeah, let us know. We don't really have them here. We don't have them wildly here at all. Another beaver question I have, I've got a lot of beaver questions, is when people are like, the taste of vanilla is actually from a beaver's anal scent. And apparently that tastes a little bit like vanilla.

So if you want to make vanilla, rather than using vanilla pods, you just get a beaver's asshole and squirt that into your ice cream or whatever. Which, man, I accepted that. Now, I don't know why, because surely vanilla beans is easier to acquire? But maybe back in the day...

Or was beavers everywhere? There's just a lot of beavers. There were a lot of beavers. I watched a documentary about guys who used to do beaver hunting, like beaver fur guys. Yeah, beaver trapping. Yeah, and dude, there were beavers fucking everywhere. And what happened to them?

I guess they were easier to eat. We ate them all. We made beaver ossobucco, like the guy does in the doco. A cool thing about beaver tails is that they store all the beaver's fat. So in the summer months, they're're kind of flaccid and disgusting, but delicious and plump and full of wonderful fats and tallows in the winter months. Did you really want to eat a beaver after watching this? Dude, you've got no fucking idea.

Oh, wait, I remember this era. Yeah, you would not stop talking about that. You wanted to eat a beaver tail. It looked so delicious. What stopped your quest? We don't really have beavers. I don't think it would be a big crime if I got a beaver tail. It looked so delicious. What stopped your quest? We don't really have beavers. I don't think it would be a big crime if I got a beaver and ate it. Well, firstly, I don't think we have beavers in Australia.

No, we don't. We don't. Yeah, but like, why don't you go on a trip and eat a beaver and make your dream come true? Well, hey, I would love to do that. Where do you get beavers? Is eating a beaver. In America, I guess, somewhere? Illegal.

Somewhere, Canada, maybe? I forget where the guy was in the docker. An episode of the television program Meat Eaters. And he made a beaver awesome little machine with me. I could look up all these beaver questions. I never bring my little machine. I'm more for me, you know? Well, you look up beavers, I'll keep explaining Beauty and the Beast.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, Beauty and the Tramp. So they have a beautiful romantic night, and they spend the night together. Beavers are one of the healthiest food available. Oh, my God, I'd be like a Superman. Yeah. Then in the morning. It's muskrats.

Muskrats live in beaver lodges over the winter. And the beavers share food. They do charge rent. That's crazy. Beaver landlords. Beaver landlords. Look up if they get rusty teeth. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We're having all our beaver mysteries answered. Imagine little machines. Little machines. They've changed the world for the better. Huh? They do? They get rusty teeth? Do beavers' teeth rust?

I'm just like, yeah. What the frick? Makes them both stronger and isn't a harmful acid that can cause tooth decay. There you go. And then there's like some pictures of beavers with rusty teeth. What the fuck? Yeah, look. They're so orange.

That's crazy. They're so orange. Man, little machines. Now I'm going to say it's gonna say beaver asshole tastes like vanilla I think if you licked a beaver's asshole it probably wouldn't taste like

vanilla although I mean what do I know beaver's apparently gamey and tastes similar to rabbit or venison I like venison

well you probably like beaver that's awesome news anyway so they spend the night together they sleep together they don't fuck down

but they sleep on each other. And in the morning, Tramp's like, hey, lady, me and you, we could live a beautiful life together. We could go off. I can give you all the streets, lady. All the streets. You live in a house. That sucks.

We could live. Oh, my God. That's probably a pretty good question, though. Do dogs and cats like living in a house? Or do they yearn for the streets? Lady fucking adores living in a house? Or do they yearn for the street? Lady fucking adores living in a house. Well, wolves, we sort of like domesticated to live in the house because they're like, it's pretty good.

Yeah, we get a bit of house, we get a bit of bone, and we also sleep on the floor with everyone there, and it's warm and nice. I think that dogs love house. Right. But I think cats yearn for the street, but cats are dumb, and they actually also love house. They just- Part of them wants to be out on the street.

I think cats yearn for the streets, but then they also yearn to be in little box. Yeah, that is true. And so the best thing for a cat is to be outside for a bit, then go in house in little box where they're protected. Yeah, yeah. You get lots of open space, and there are very little open spaces. Yeah. That's perfect for a cat. Yeah.

Oh, anyway, then Lady leaves the tramp. Yeah. They're going home. Tramp gets distracted fighting chickens or whatever. Lady gets... What? Well, they pass by a bunch of chickens. And he gets distracted.

Yeah, he's like, hey, you ever fought chickens? And Lady's like, I don't know about this. And then he's like, it's fucking awesome. He kind of embarrasses himself. And he goes and chases the chickens.

And then whilst this is happening Lady gets picked up by the dog catcher oh because she's got no collar she gets taken to the pound there's a lot of dogs there there's a crazy scene

that I was very shocked to see in this movie where a little dog it gets taken to be put down they're like what's happening they're like death row

and the dog gets dragged behind a door and they're like that's it one way ticket're like, death row. And the dog gets dragged behind a door. And they're like, that's it. One way ticket. That's how you die. Then there's a song. Does that dog come back? That dog got given the electric chair.

It's so fucked up. So she's in the pound. They sing a song about how the tramps had multiple girlfriends previously. Yeah. Classic. Classic. He's a dog. What happened to all of them?

The pound? The electric chair? Well, then lady, they come and they're like, oh, we found out you're registered, lady. We're taking you back to your family. Yeah. We never, and all of those pound dogs, there's a scene earlier where Tramp saves them

from getting, like, from the dog catching cart. Yeah. So we know these dogs. Yeah. We never see those dogs again. Well, that's because they all go through the electric chair. They all get put down. Yeah.

It's crazy. I was waiting. They're like, at the ending of the movie, I'm like, oh, well, there's ladies friends again. But the electric chair. They all get put down. It's crazy. I was waiting. They're like, the ending of the movie, I'm like, oh, well, there's Lady's friends again. But like, we're going to see Tramp's friends again, right? Right? Wrong. Oh, that's the credits. Bella Notte.

Beautiful night. Then Lady goes back, fights a rat. Yeah. The mean aunt calls the pound again. Yeah. Taking them away. Yeah. Parents come home.

They find the dead rat They're like Oh is she a good dog And then Tramp gets a collar And lives with the family And they have puppies The end Okay

So When does the spaghetti happen When they're having their beautiful night The spaghetti scene is They're like we should eat Tramp takes Lady to his favorite Italian restaurant Tone's They say we should give the dogs bone

But then the Italian fellas that run the place, they see that Tramp's got a beautiful girlfriend and they say, we're not giving you a bone. It's a beautiful romantic thing. Cook the dogs spaghetti. And then the other Italian guy

in the kitchen says, dogs can't talk. And the first Italian guy says, they're talking to me. And he's got the most emotion you've ever heard in your life. He speaks to the dogs. He speaks to the dogs.

Then they cook, but he can't understand them. But they cook them spaghetti. The dogs eat the spaghetti. He speaks to the dogs. Then they cook, but he can't understand them. Yeah. But they cook them spaghetti. Yeah. The dogs eat the spaghetti whilst the two Italian guys play beautiful music

and sing Bellandote. And then there's that classic Lady and the Tramp scene where they both get a bit of spaghetti and the dogs kiss. That's very cool. Now let's imagine the three of us,

we were strolling around 1950s, let's say New York. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Wherever it is. I love this depression. I love this. Man, I'm not a fan. 1950s, you say? We're not in a York. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Wherever it is. I love this depression. I love this. Man, I'm not a fan.

1950s, you say? We're not in a depression. Wars happened. That's true. I love not being in war. Actually, maybe it's set earlier than that because there's no cars.

Anyway, we're wandering past and we look... There's no cars. Yeah, but there's cars. There's like horses and carts. But I think horses and carts existed for way longer than you think they did.

Yeah, that's true. That's true. Maybe it's like the, I don't know. Nobody talks about the war. So it's pre, like the 10s? Maybe the 1910s. Let's say it's 1910s in New York. Does anyone have a cell phone?

We're walking past. We look down the street and we see two dogs sitting in front of a bowl of spaghetti and they kiss. What do we think's going on? I would be okay. I think I would just go like, hey, guys. Yeah, what's up? Did we all just see that happen? Did we just see that?

Don't just like gently share a strand of spaghetti, and I'm pretty sure they just started. I think they kissed. Can dogs be in love? Can dogs kiss? Do they have traditional lips for kissing? Dogs don't have kissing lips. No, they got...

They got something. They're bad fans. Because when people say, oh, the dog's giving me kisses, the dog's licking. Yes, it's true. Is there tongue? No, there's no tongue. It's not a kiss in the French style. It's more like a...

I found out The Lady and the Tramp was set in 1909. Okay. Did they have French kissing back then? No. That was illegal. You could only do that in brothels. Had the French made their way to America by then? I'd be very confused.

Wait, when's World War I? It's like the 19-teens Oh yeah that's right Oh yeah 19-seven 1912 to 1916 I'm gonna say That's wrong Fuck But you don't know

how wrong you are That's my saving grace I wanna say like 1917 or something like that Well 1917 is definitely one of the years during the war. 1912? I reckon it ends in 1907.

We have our little machine. It ends in 1919, I reckon. I'm saying 1912 to 1917. Or are we fucked and it's 1920s? No, it's 1914 to 1918. Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

World War 2 1930 1939 to 1945 Yeah I think that's right 1939 It definitely ends in 1945 World War 1 To Vietnam The thing about Vietnam is it went for a very long time

And I think the thing we should focus on is that America lost And that's awesome That is sick The thing about Vietnam is it went for a very long time. And I think the thing we should focus on is that America lost, and that's awesome. That is sick. 55 to 75. Damn. When was the Cold War? When did it end?

Great question. When did the Berlin Wall fall? Yes, but the USSR wasn't disbanded until 91. Yes, yes. And I know that the Berlin Wall is not in Russia. It is in Berlin, which is traditionally in Germany. Yeah. So I don't know why I brought that up.

East and West Germany. I think the Cold War. Anyway. Regardless, our dogs people. Well, firstly, I'd be like, what just happened? Because I had a dog when I was younger, and you did get a little chippy, and you put it in front, and you gingerly bite little chippy, and you'd put it in front, and he'd gingerly bite it out.

And if you got an extra long one, you'd put it in your mouth, and he'd come up, and he'd just bite. Why are you licking the trapping with your dog? Except that one time where it licked my mouth, and I hated it. You're a lady in the trapping with a dog. Yeah. Lady in the chipping. Yeah. I don't like when people like being licked by their dog. No, I hate it.

I had a friend, dog comes over, licks my knees. I'm like, stop licking my knees. Yeah, it's wet. It's gross. I fucking hate when people are like, oh, you're giving me kisses on the mouth. Oh, well, who goes. What about a kiss just like somewhere else on the body? That was too vague.

It's like the arm, the arm, the arm. If the dog just comes up and licks me, I'm like, that's funny. Don't do that. Yeah, I don't want a dog licking me. People sometimes like being licked by their dog'm like, that's funny. Don't do that. People sometimes like being licked by their dog. They've got that dog brain. They've had a dog for too long. They're like, the dog's giving me kisses. No licking.

It's disgusting. Don't let a dog lick in your mouth. Dogs eat human shit. Dogs are gross. Most animals are gross. Don't let any animal lick in your mouth. Don't make out with other guys and gals because they're... The human mouth is disgusting, dude. People will eat human shit.

Yeah. You never know who's eating human shit. You never know who's one of them perverts that are out there. You don't know. Anyone you know could be quietly eating human shit. Yeah. Yeah, man. Any one of us.

Any one of us. Traditionally, one in three. One of us is eating human shit like I'm about to tell a very horrible story so this is something that you need

again if this is something you may want to skip forward maybe like a minute or two wow it's not going to bad

content warning bad okay well sign me up so again I read this on like a reddit thing about like someone asking asking a sex worker, in one of those threads about sex workers out there,

what's some of the most fucked up thing you have? Okay, so I guess that is probably the trigger warning. Yeah, you've got the fucking... You've got the whole... You've got the setup. Yeah, for four, maybe two minutes. So this person was like, the most fucked up thing that ever happened was we had this one guy who was dressed up like a businessman, like a business suit, everything like that.

They would come in, and they would give an esky, like a cooler pack. And then they would be like, cool. Every time that you service a man, and they come in a condom, grab that condom, tie it up, put it in that esky. Now we're back at the end of the week. He'd come by at the end of the week He'd have a second esky He'd be like thank you Give them the second esky

And then he'd take the original esky And then he would proceed To drink Out of the condom The week's worth Whoa That's awesome That rocks

Combs shouldn't be served cold I just think like Did he do it Was he a man about town Yeah man Wake up in the morning Drink your old comb from a condom. Put it in your coffee.

Well, it's just like, it's more, because like, cum is, I wouldn't say traditionally, but it is ingested. Yeah, that's true. People do it. But like, not at that much quantities and over a space of a week, maybe two. Out of a condom too. Also out of an esky. Eskies, great. Sure, they keep things cold,

but they're not like a fucking refrigerator. Do you think he would, like, the night before, take out one of the condoms, leave it to defrost in the fridge? Well, it's an esky. Well, no, because they're freezing it. Oh, this is just keeping it cold.

Yeah. And again, if you have, like, what, an ice pack in there at the start of the week, by the end of the week, it's not going to last. So it's going to be lukewarm, tepid, old cum

mixed with latex lube lube juices also again it's all the people that went to a brothel

and like you don't know the health of those people no oh no I drank cold cum and it made me sick I wonder what caused it

I just think how do you get to that point where you're like I like drinking this is what I want it's like an interesting variation of being cucked I guess

there's gotta be some element of that in there but then you're like I don't wanna be there for it I just wanna drink I wanna be so removed from the actual act of fucking

I think that's fabulous I mean yeah I guess it's probably an evolution of like the type of people that are like I tasted my own cum

and then I started eating my own cum yeah because cum's awesome there's nothing wrong with cum no

but like it's just like an abstraction from the I guess it's like also like oh it's very you know taboo I shouldn't be doing this

I shouldn't be drinking every man's cum and also maybe again it's that kind of thing maybe it's like a bit of a repressed thing as well if you're like a very straight-laced kind of thing.

Oh, yeah, that's true, yeah. Like, I can't let it, you know, again, the kind of repressed, like, you know, I can't show affection towards other men. Yeah, yeah. I love the idea

of sucking a lot of, like, a lot of hog. A lot of dick and getting called in. But, you know, I have been, you know, in a Western society being like,

shut the, you can't put a dick in your mouth. Yeah. And to be just like, no, I guess this is what I like to do. Kind of like. More power.

You know how like. Yeah. That's awesome. It's kind of like if like an orgy is a buffet. Yeah. Yes. You know, like when you go to like a really. Like a bain marie.

You know, when you go to like a fancy restaurant Like a really fancy restaurant They might have like Nine or ten courses But they're all really small Oh yeah What is it called? I know what you mean It's like a news booth Gas

Like a gas Not a gastropub I know what you mean Anyway that thing Anyway I guess that's The sampling of all the different sides Yeah Gas station

Gastronomy Is that what you mean? No it's not Anyway Lots of little courses The sampling of all the different sides. Gastation? Gastronomy? Is that what you mean? No, it's not. Anyway, lots of little courses. Anyway, that's what he's doing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's businessman-ing an orgy.

It's a very interesting thing to think about. I wish him the best. He knows what he's about. Yeah, I hope he's still out there doing it. If I found out someone was drinking my cum out of a condom, how would that make me feel? Um, uh,

a little sick. Yeah. But that's what's to do with my own cum. That's just in general. That's just drinking cum out of a condom. There's something about, you know,

okay, whatever. We have an intimate moment. Yeah. Um, we're practicing safe sex. Nice. So we're,

you know, we're, I'm wrapped up. I cum. He's like, that was great. Grabs the condom and then just squeezes it like a fucking go-good or a zooper dooper i'm like maybe in the heat of the moment i'm like maybe that's hot and sexy and start making out i don't know but this is i'm like

it's just this is so removed plus i can't stop thinking about like the texture seven days ago yeah it's old cop that's old ass And the orgasm of time gone by. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's got to be right. Yeah. It's very interesting. Yeah. I would honestly have thought that like Condom City.

Condom City. Come singing a condom for that long would. Go bad. Get real bad. Or just like, I don't know. Hey, it's your story, brother. You did this. No, no.

You were warning for me. Yeah. God damn. Do you think, you know, we were saying before, one in three people eat human shit. Yeah, that's a true statistic. That's a real statistic backed up by real science. If you found out one of us had been sucking down, like,

you know, seven condoms I mean, I don't know how many condoms it would have been It would have been probably a lot Say 30 condoms a week Yeah Full of cum or eating human shit Which would you prefer to discover about it? The cum

Yeah, me too Yeah Human shit's a On an awful scale Yeah, I think It's a line in the sand. I think it's just because of the way our brains are wired, because we don't have a shit fetish.

Eating human shit is just a confusing and baffling thing to me. I can take the logical jobs to get to sucking 30, cum out of 30 condoms. I would be more concerned I think with like 30 used condoms I'd be like dude why are you doing this in the most unhygienic

way humanly possible it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me

it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me

it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me

it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me

it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me

it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's me it's awesome can't we just look if you're gonna do this can we at least

give them a mini fridge well that's nice of you to help me out to figure out a more efficient way to do it no because there'll be other elements to it why it would be an esky

and stuff like that it's clearly like and it's like an under the table deal where if it's a mini fridge then that removes like the secrecy of it

it doesn't feel as could you handle me vomiting in front of you while you tell me this I think I would feel really bad that I made a friend

throw up yeah but that would probably make the fetish stronger oh that's true it would make me feel more guilty which would maybe

be awesome yeah like vomiting looking up he's fucking pitching oh my god I gotta go home

I've been a bad boy I've been a naughty boy yeah I've been a naughty boy. I gotta go and fetch my ass. Time to go get naughty with these 30 condoms. 30 is also probably... Probably an underestimate, really. That would be a bad week at the brothel if it's only 30 condoms.

I'm starting to get a sense of how economically the brothel is doing by how many Johnnies I get. You guys alright? Only ten? Do you want me to pay you more? I think, you know, as long as, if I found out you guys

were eating human shit and sucking the cum out of 30 condoms, as long as you were being safe about it, I would be... I mean, this guy wasn't being safe. No, no, no.

But if you would, you know, no judgment. You know, live your life. God bless. Yeah, because there's a story I remember reading about people who love to eat human shit yeah

and it was like they would have like a shit party where they'd make it like you know bake it basically and make sort of like a human brownie

okay I think it was like to do with like the doctor treating that to be just like you know while giving them because you know

all kinds of manners of badness when it comes to you know eating excrement yeah of course and so I was like well you know

prescribing these people medication. Yeah, so that they can counteract the… And it's like, well, why are you doing that and not just stopping the whole thing happening? And I think the doctor was very much like, well, I can't. They're going to do it. Like, I can't stop them. Yeah, of course. So why even try?

You might as well just make sure that they do it safely. Yeah. Which is a horrible thing, but also at the same time… Something noble about it. That's something noble. Yeah. I can't stop thinking about the kind of person

who's a big fan of Plumbing the Nut stuff. Yeah. Oh yeah. And they've got a partner say and their partner's never listened to an episode and they're like hey.

You like Lady of the Trill. It's like it's a very funny topic like how could you respond you know they're eating this spaghetti two dogs it's a Disney movie.

That's really silly. Like that's funny. We're like 35 minutes in we haven't really discussed this. No. Are you listening through? Are you like oh there's a Disney movie that's really silly like that's funny we're like 35 meters in we haven't really discussed this no are you listening through are you like

oh there's a trigger warning well this people won't be it can't be that bad that bad you turn to your partner you say oh sometimes they get a little blue sometimes they get a little gross

and now now here we are you're getting divorced yeah if you need a divorce witness it's like what J.D. thought the owners of Lady were doing

yeah yeah exactly that's how the episode. You know, like, when you get married, you have to have a witness. Yeah. Plumbing the Death Star offers to be a divorce witness. Yeah. Yeah, we'll be there. We'll be there.

Uh, right. Well, okay, so that's, like, Lady and the Tramp eating the spaghetti is actually a different scene. It's not just the two dogs. Yeah. So, actually, it's two dogs and then two guys dressed like they're chefs, playing an accordion and a little violin, dancing around the dogs, singing a song. I think I walk past that.

I see that. My brain's like, huh, okay. I sure hope a war's coming to fix this. Several things. For example, if we were, say, the owners of that restaurant. Yes. Because we know this dog. This dog is a dog about town.

Yeah, yeah. And this dog usually only comes by him's lonesome. And we give him a bone. And then suddenly we see he brings a friend. Yeah. And we can clearly tell it's a lady friend. Absolutely. So if there's a, I can make that leap to be like, this dog is on a date.

Yeah. I'm going to be the guy where he speaks to me he's talking to me we're making this special so I would be on that side of the fence being like we're making this special

for this dog and then the other person being like it's a dog it's a dog cook the fucking spaghetti brother I don't care

I'm cooking the spaghetti I'm on the other side of that I'm like oh two dogs and then someone's like they're on a date I'm like they don't know what the fuck's going on yeah they're following a smell to our restaurant do you well you know i was gonna make fun of you with the

idea of being all these two dogs are on a date but you just reminded me of when i was young yeah i one day i was up with my brother we were watching movies it would have been like 3 a.m yeah suddenly this is crashing at the door open the door. Dog we've never seen before in our life. Yeah. Stranger dog. It's a golden retriever.

Yeah. And then we knew the dog's in the area. Yeah. We're like, who's this dog? The dog just looks in, looks behind us.

Our dog, Follow, comes up. Yeah. Joins that dog. They leave for an hour. Just Follow comes back.

We never saw that dog again. Went on a date. And I think he went on a little date. Went on a date. And I think he went on a little date. Went on a date. I think that was a little hookup. It was a little hookup.

Here's what I think happened. Yeah. A dog you've never seen before came to your front door. Yeah. That is true. I think that that part. Thank you for believing me. Well, here's what things.

Thank you for believing me about a thing that happened in my life. Yeah. Yeah. Now, I think, and you have traditionally shown signs of this. Okay. You and your brother, it's late. You're tired. You're excited by this mysterious dog because obviously you've never seen this dog before.

This is very exciting, yeah. Follow your other dog, your actual dog, the one you're familiar with, goes outside. Then you get really excited about the fact that follow's gone on a date. You don't actually go outside, so you don't know where they've gone. No, I don't know where they left. It's like 3am, where are they going? Nothing's open. I'm assuming what happened was Follow saw

another dog. Both dogs pretty timid. Went outside, stood around for a bit, the other dog walked off. They left together. You could tell. They were like walking side by side. There was recognition on their faces. They knew each other. This is coming from a man that got really

angry that his dog didn't give wasn't satisfied with a birthday stay. Didn't say thank you? Yeah. Ate it too quickly. It just wasn't appreciative. Yeah. So yeah, I think that you just get excited about dogs. Okay. It's a fair assessment., yeah, I think that you just get excited about dogs. Okay. Yeah.

It's a fair assessment. So, yeah, I think I'm... I think I'm on a date. Yeah, thank you. Yeah, you also get excited about dogs. You're the man that's been like, they're on a date! They are on a date! I'm the man working at the restaurant being like, I need to get another job.

Make spaghetti and you're there being like, well, it's coming. I'm glad it's 1909 and I can smoke in the kitchen. So, yeah, I think... You're probably getting paid like a throppance or whatever. Oh, it's America. A dime. A dime. A quarter.

I'm getting paid a quarter, a dime on every quarter. I'm getting paid dimes. Pennies. Yeah, pennies on the quarter. I think if I'm working there, I clearly have not a lot going on. Sure. And maybe I'm like whatever i need this yeah okay so the dog's lives is really what's keeping you going their date is what's keeping

you going through the day guys like they're speaking to me yeah and he's like we're making this a beautiful night for these two dogs clearly something's going on yeah yeah he's emotionally fragile he's emotionally fragile and either way if i'm that person that emotional fragile state or if i am the friend of the person emotional i emotional, I'm like, well, we're doing this for them. Yeah, okay. It's like dressing up a cat or a dog in a cute little outfit and whatever that is. And it's like, you're not doing this for the cat or the dog. You're doing this for you.

And like, look, I'm here to support you. And so like, yeah, all right, we'll make some spaghetti. We'll play some music. We'll play some music. We'll have that. And if we're there, I'm playing them. Like I'm playing the accordions, having a good time. And then they're eating spaghetti. But then if they kiss, I'm going to be like.

Something I keep thinking about as well is that when they kiss, it's because they're sucking up spaghetti. They're doing a little. Yeah. Can a dog do that? No. I don't think a dog's got a mouth to slurp spaghetti

dogs can't whistle no and that is something that is like you need to be able to do to slurp up spaghetti so I think

seeing the dog slurp spaghetti I would be like I don't know if this is a dog what have I found I'm trying to figure out so I think

that the dogs just ate the spaghetti you know my stance on this so I was just looking up 1909 New York vibes. Just to see what the vibe in America, what was going on. I don't know if it is New York, but yes. Well, it's in America. So I looked up, sorry, 1909 in the United States.

Just trying to see if there's anything that could be like, oh, is it a good year or a bad year? Because if it's a really good year, they might just be stoked all the time. You see a dog eating spaghetti, it's the best day of your life. Well, because every day is the best day of your life. But also, if it was a bad year, they're just clinging on to something.

If this is set in the 30s, you're like, it's a great depression. But then I'd also be like, don't fucking give them spaghetti. Don't waste the spaghetti on the dogs. Well, we're making awful spaghetti. It's not good spaghetti. We could eat that spaghetti. Yeah, you're giving the, we're making awful spaghetti. Yeah, yeah. It's not good spaghetti. No, but we could eat that.

Yeah, yeah. You don't want to waste any food. The dog gets the scraps no matter what. But we get the scraps. Yeah, yeah. Well, yeah. The dog starves. Yeah.

So what was happening? Have you found anything? It was the last year of the Black Patch Tobacco Wars. Okay. I don't know what that is. Yeah. But it sounds awesome. Well, I don't think there's anything specifically

turn of century there's probably stuff going on the troops returned from Cuba after being there since the Spanish American war which ended in like 1898 or something so they've been hanging out there for a while I guess the broader question though

we use the spaghetti as a sort of Abraham Lincoln's 100th birthday happy use the spaghetti as a sort of like a it's abraham lincoln's 100th birthday happy ablincoln that's a sort of like macro you know or or microcosm of the real question is the dogs and lady and the tramp are people yes they are quietly people and they do human things yeah now if you witness those human things, or if you realize you had that awakening, oh, my dogs behave a sentient effect. Sapient, sorry, yeah. Because even if we're just walking by with the guys who are making them spaghetti, we're like, ha-ha, they're on a date.

But then it dawned on me to be like, well, hang on a second. This dog, this dog about town, he came to this restaurant because he knows that we give a bone here. And this dog is kind of being altruistic by being like, well, I've made a friend. And at least I can make a connection there to be like, well, this dog knows that he might get a bone. But he also, his new friend might get a bone. And it looks like these two dogs are kind of like on a date. And also, with the spaghetti scene,

very specifically, after they kiss, or maybe just before, Tramp, with his nose, rolls a meatball for Lady to eat. So then I would assume that this is like a behavior of a dog that I have never seen before. I'm like, is the female dog,

is she pregnant with puppies? like is this a protective thing where like the male of the species is now being like no you need to eat and get healthy

they do have puppies at some point but I don't know when they burn down but then it's kind of like I'm looking at like you know lady and it's like

there's no telltale sign yeah yeah but then again it depends how much I know about dogs for sure I don't know what a telltale sign

of a dog is I don't know if you showed me a pregnant dog if I could tell. Big tickle. Dog's fat. You don't care. Dogs look big, isn't it? So, yeah.

So, I'd be like, I guess that's like a pregnant dog looking after it kind of stuff. But it's weird how tender this dog is being. There's a lot of intimacy on this dog date. That isn't facilitated by the two Italian guys there's just a genuine level of

intimacy and care these dogs have for one another well I guess like if you're walking past the alley where it's happening and you just like

kind of don't break your stride you probably think the two owners the two men you'd be like that's funny they're having fun

with some dogs they're like that's their dogs and they're either hanging out with their dogs or they're trying to's their dogs. And they're either hanging out with their dogs or they're trying to get their dogs to fart. Yeah, they're filming. Filming?

They're doing a thing filmed for a YouTube, TikTok thing while it truly before that became a thing. Or again, there's not much else going on. We don't have TV yet. They're making a little play. Here's another human behavior the dogs engage in. So the dogs in the pound, and I assume this is

Disney being like, they fear death? Well, they definitely do. But also the dogs, there's three dogs, maybe four dogs that sing. And whilst that happens, a sausage dog is basically digging a tunnel out. And when they stop singing, like the sausage dog

is clearly that's designed to cover this up. If you notice that behavior in the dogs, is that going's designed to cover this up yeah if you notice that behavior in the dogs is that going to make you be like maybe these dogs are I'm thinking just that dogs are a lot smarter

than we yeah we give them credit for but like dogs are already pretty smart yeah that's true but the the thing with smart animals

is they're still very dumb yeah yeah yeah so like if I'm seeing this I'm like Jesus Christ that's special dogs. Those dogs, don't put them down. We're going to sell these to a circus.

Because it's like, yeah, because it's like, okay, yeah, the dogs are quite intelligent. They can be trained. They can do tricks, et cetera, et cetera. We know that about dogs. Yeah. But these dogs are doing something to like, you know, an extra level. Yeah.

It's a theory of mind happening here. Yeah. You're witnessing a crow use a tool, and you're like, hang on. Like, wait a fucking second. This crow knows something. Let that crow get that gun. Yeah.

What the fuck? What does it want? Oh, it's pointing it at me. Yeah. And I guess if it's like, yeah, digging out, it knows not to be here. It knows that this is like, oh, hang on, it's got to be put down.

Absolutely. Yeah, it just, there is that level of like. There's something else going on with these dogs. And then, Tramp, the dogs know it, which is weird. They know that humans can't understand them, but that they are as clever as humans. Can they understand

people? Yes. They can understand people. So dogs in Lady and the Tramp are smarter than people. They just know language. They understand what a human being says. But they're also kind of dumb. So Lady thinks that her owner's names are John Darling and Sweetheart, because that's what they call each other.

Yeah. Oh, John Darling, could you get this? Oh, Sweetheart, could you get this? But pretty much they have real names. I reckon John and Sweet. Sweet. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Last name is Hart.

It's John Hart and Sweetheart. John Hart, Sweetheart, ladies owners. And there appears to be some sliding scale of understanding where a gorilla is not animal enough to understand a dog. It's two guy. Gorilla's two guy. But a beaver is human enough. Beaver, yeah, or is dog enough that the dogs can talk to it.

So gorilla two guy, beaver dog enough. Dog enough. Yeah. Crocodile two dog. Somewhere in between and talks without moving its mouth. Wants to eat the dogs can talk to it. So gorilla two guy, beaver dog enough. Dog enough. Yeah. Crocodile. Somewhere in between and talks without moving its mouth. Wants to eat the dogs. He's a monster. Who knows what's going on with the crocodile.

He wants to eat the dogs. Yeah, he wants to eat the dogs. That's the whole point why its mouth is open. It's like, come here. Well, Lady and the Tramp, dumb. Well, they figure it out. They run away. That's true.

That's true. That's true. It sounds like you're a bit dumb. No, because they go, Tramp talks as though he's been to the zoo a bunch of times. Yeah, because he's trying to impress ladies. For him to not realize that the alligator will try and eat them. Yeah. Dumb.

Maybe he's never realized. He knows this alligator. He calls him Al. He knows him. Yeah, but he's trying to eat him. But then you didn't realize the alligator was trying to eat him. No, I did. I thought it was dumb that they would even go to the alligator in the first place.

Well, they know enough to be like, it's a sharp implement. Yeah. We need that. Alligator has teeth. Yeah. So we the first place. Well, they know enough to be like, it's a sharp implement. We need that. Alligator has teeth. So we could do that. Hey, owl. And the owl's like, well, you know. Hey, here's the issue. Yeah, we're friends, but I will eat you. I am hungry. Yeah, fair enough. It's like, not a good friend.

Yeah, one of those traditional bad friends. Yeah, fair enough. So there is some sliding scale of understanding, and that makes it weird on a strange ending to the movie that they all end up as pets. Yeah. Because they're like people. Well, this is where the start, where you're like,

do dogs like being outside or inside? Well, clearly they like being inside because they're not wet and living in a barrel. Yeah. Sure, you give up. Tramp loved living in a barrel. I know he loved living in a barrel. I think know you give up he's really happy about it but he doesn't know how good it could be so sure he's like what am i gonna eat today am i gonna eat this is this but like you know sure he's looking at it and giving

it the best possible solution here yeah it's like he's acting like he could get meals from every one of those things i haven't been down to you know but maybe only tony's is like he could get meals from every one of those things. But I haven't been down to, you know. But maybe only Tony's is the one. And they just give him a bone. Or it's the kind of thing where it's just like, you know, no, I do have it good. But then really, like, he doesn't. He's actually got it bad. So he's got the freedom, in a sense, to choose where he could go. But...

Well, I guess he's always under threat of being put down. He's always under threat of being put down. He's always under threat of them not having enough food. Whereas, sure, Lady doesn't have enough freedoms, but she has the security of being looked after. That's the price you pay. That's why I am pro the NSA spying on citizens. Yeah, would you prefer to live under the thumb but live safe

or live in the streets but be shot with a gun? Oh, my. Neither sounds so good. I'm surprised you got a pet. Would you rather be a dog on the street or a dog in a house? Dog in a house. I don't know. I think it's more complicated. Dog in a house.

Dog in a house. Live longer. I live longer. If I get something wrong with me, if I, you know, whatever it might be. You got a bad case of worms. Bad case of worms. You've got worms so bad that you're like one of those dogs where the worms are literally sticking out of its arsehole. You've got worms so bad the worm wants out. Worms are bad, it's overcrowded.

There's so many worms in there. Or even something as simple as, I don't know, eczema on my paws. If I'm on the street, well, I am now mostly worm. I'm worm-covered in eczema. But I am now like mostly worm. Yeah. I'm worm covered in X-Bone. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whereas if I am at least, you know, with owners who do love me and can do it and spend money.

Because again, there are trash owners out there. There are people who have animals that they should not have animals. Like that guy that had the monkey. Yeah, yeah. He should not have had that monkey. He should not have had that monkey. He should not have had that monkey. So ideally, if I'm living in a house with someone who can look after me,

there's a chance that they're going to take me to the vet, and they might be like, yes, we're going to get the worms out for you, but there's also that problem of there's too many worms. Put the dog down. You're like, their parents are not going to kill me. I'm going to live with owners. Fuck. I've got too many worms.

So is it better to be full of worms? Is it better to be killed by the state or the people you love? Yeah! That's today's real plug. Those worms do love me. Yeah, well I mean is it better to be killed by your loved ones, to be put to death by your loved ones, or put to death by the state? I think getting put to death by your loved ones, because they're suffering too. Yeah, that's true.

If you're put to death by the state, you're just part of the machine. Exactly. Put to death by your loved ones, you're making an impact. Yeah, they're remembering. You might get a grave at the back. I have, you know, like using the Simpsons, Sans little helper. I have a problem that's going to, you know, cause a lot of financial strain on the family. Or a problem for the state.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I suppose. I suppose that Trav's choice was a smart one. Yeah. I'd go with, you know, going to like, you know, ladies' families who seem like they are well off,

who seem like, you know, they can afford. They can cure my worms. He gave up his freedom for security. And that's not a bad thing to do. Sure. Yeah. If you're, say, I don't know, when you're younger, or

personally, or let's just say a nation, but if you're a young sort of thing growing up, you value your freedom. Of course. You value your, you know, I want to be able to do so many different things. I want to be able to do this this i want to be able to put myself in harm's way i want to be able to eat a lot of worms without uh you know dealing with the consequences straight away it's interesting the damaged dog got worms because he ate worms yeah that's how it typically works

you're like eating around in the Dirt Eat some bad fish Yeah Eat some bad fish That's how we get worms That's how we get worms Yeah If I think a dog or whatever Can like They're rooting around in like

How do bears I know bears Get really bad worms You ever seen those videos Of the bears With worms trailing so far behind it That it's like Eight bears back

Yeah Out the bear's arsehole Yeah I thought it was like Just like eating in like dirt And that kind of stuff like that Maybe I don't think a bear's hand can do that a bear's that You'd be like You dumb motherfucker You're putting the worm back for a king

God damn it worm You've reloaded the worm I hate you bear Bear You're so stupid And the bear like And you're like Oh fuck back in the car

Back in the car it hurt me Run run run Just slamming your keys into the lock So yeah as you know A young pup It might be like Well I value my freedom I can do whatever I want to do So yeah, as you know, a young pup, it might be like, well, I value my freedom. I can do whatever I want to do.

So I'm not going to eat a bone at Tony's or whatever. But then it's just kind of like, well, you know, as you get older, he's like, well, maybe I kind of value security. Maybe I value that like I'm a bit of an older dog now. I think for Tramp, he just falls in love with Lady and he's like, this is the price of loving you. I understand that as well.

The price of loving you is I've got to live in this house. And also, again, when you're a young person, you're kind of like, well, I have the freedom to go out and do whatever I want. I want to play Nintendo to 3 a.m. in the morning. It's an awesome thing to do. Great console. And then maybe when you get older, you have other responsibilities. Maybe you have to be like, well, I have to sacrifice that. You've got to settle down.

I have to sacrifice those freedoms of playing Nintendo of playing nintendo at three in the morning to like uh live in a shelter i don't know i think that the the all of the tramp's friends who were put down will haunt him yeah because the tramp says why have you done this because in the beginning of the movie he saves them from a the dog cart does tramp know what happened well because i think because now tramp is out of sight, out of mind. Now Tramp is out living in a big mansion. I think he was dating one of them at one point. Surely he was friends with these people.

Yeah, I think- But now he's not going out anymore, right? Well, he's not allowed. He's sort of contained to the- I think- So really, how could he find out that information? Unless a boogeyman- Well, I would hope my friends would come and visit me.

Yeah, but I think- If they didn't for long enough, I'd be like, I bet they got put down. I think if I found out that one of my exes had been given the electric chair,

even if it was one I'm just never in contact with, that would fuck me up. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. But how would you know, though? Because you're so confined and no one's telling you.

Dogs don't have Facebook. Well, the thing actually about the dogs and ladies. I guess when people get given the electric chair, they often don't post, oh, although I don't know guess when people get given the electric chair, they often don't post it. Although I don't know anyone that's going to give them the electric chair. That's true.

Maybe they would post it on Facebook. Just beforehand. Yeah, about to take the chair. About to sit down. Hey, guys. I'm out. Peace. Peace.

Electric- To all the haters, fuck you. Lightning emoji, lightning emoji. Yeah. Well, the dogs, lady, and the tramp actually do leave the house sometimes to go visit each other. Oh, they go for walks? They go for the walks. Yeah, so I guess you could talk to the new dog on the way down. So maybe there is still freedom and the Lady and the Tramp live happily ever after.

And spaghetti was good. I reckon that aunt comes back and gets both dogs put down. Well, she really hated the dogs. Her racist cats? Yeah. So, yeah, I guess if I saw two dogs making out, I think it would really fuck with my worldview and maybe really be like, well, what do we know about dogs?

How much of that is wrong? I think if I saw two dogs making out, I would just laugh and laugh. Oh, yeah. And I think, like, I'm the most, like, so we've got, like, a whole spectrum here because Zama changes his life. Jackson, you're full of joy.

I don't even register it really. I'm just like, no. I didn't know dogs could do that. I'm like, the dogs aren't doing what I think they're doing. They're dogs. They're just eating. Yeah, I think it just come down to the whole like, oh, I guess what I have led to believe about, you know, what people have told me is wrong and that dogs can make out with each other. And that's

yeah maybe it wouldn't change my whole world view dogs can kiss yeah my day is still the same yeah yeah

fair enough you carry on yeah yeah can dogs kiss already maybe no they always lick

each other they see each other as assholes they groom each other yeah do they dogs don't least lick each other. They sniff each other's arseholes. That's maybe what I'm thinking of. They groom each other. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do they? Dogs don't usually groom each other. You're thinking of cats.

I am thinking of cats. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But yeah, I guess if I saw two dogs kissing, I might just be like, oh, cats, dogs just kiss. Yeah. Like, that's just not...

I guess I never noticed that before in dogs. Anyway, off to go buy this pie or whatever I'm doing. But then as a dog, a previous dog owner, then I'd be like, did my dogs hate each other? They never kissed.

They never kissed. Maybe they just weren't dating. Maybe they weren't dating. Oh, wait, it never owns two dogs. Anyway, back to the guy with this pie. Well, I've owned two dogs. And he's like, oh. They never kissed.

They never kissed. Yeah. Although maybe like, you know, you go to a dog park and you see a bunch of dogs and you're like, hey, none of those boyfriend, girlfriend. My dog was a loser. No one wanted to kiss my dog Hey does your dog Want to kiss my dog

No dude Your dog's an incel Okay Alright All the other dogs Talk in heaps Shit about your dog Have you heard

Oh dude I thought you knew It's very embarrassing Your dog stinks What It's been going on Dog fortune How do you know So much stinks. What? It's been going on dog fortune. How do you know so much about my dog?

My dog's been telling me. Your dog not talking to you? That's a red flag. How much does your dog talk to you? Heaps. We're on the phone chatting. Where's your dog? In the backyard.

He's got his own phone? Yeah. I love my dog. I bought him his own plan. Where does he carry the phone? Keep the phone. It's a dog phone. It's on his collar.

Oh, okay. You really, I wonder why your dog's all fucked up. Animal abuse. It's on his collar. I just didn't think that. Where did you buy it? It was a pet store. I've never seen The electronics section

In a pet store And then looking down At your dog Your dog's just looking up At you And you're like Are you pissed off with me? That you don't have

A dog phone? Are you giving me The silent treatment At all times? Do you think you could Text other dogs And maybe meet up For a hook up

If you had a dog phone? Have I stopped this? Have I fucked up my dog's life? Yeah. Have I made my dog like this? Oh, fuck, dude. Yeah, if you found out that dogs can date and you're keeping your dog behind a locked door

so they can't go out on dates, are you feeling a little bit guilty? Well, I'm thinking it's been out of the game so long. Also, did you neuter or spay your dog today? Then you're like, oh. Oh, buddy. Maybe that's good, though, for the dating scene, especially for an older dog. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't want pups. Yeah, exactly. I just want to have fun. You had the snip of your nuts. You had the snip of your nuts, yes. Yeah. Wow.

There's a lot to mull over, a lot to think about. A lot to mull over. I guess, yeah, it comes down to a personal decision about how you would treat your dog if you owned a dog. But if you didn't own a dog, I'd be like, well, time to go pat my cat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dogs are alive, but cats aren't. Yeah.

Oh, now I'm thinking about cats being alive. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, no. Your cats are having little full lives when you're not around. Should I take them outside? Because I love to be outside. Yeah. No.

In a little box. Cats shouldn't be outside. I agree. They're bad for the environment. Yeah, they'll eat their native birds. Yeah, they'll to be outside. Yeah. No. In a little box. Cats shouldn't be outside. I agree. They're bad for the environment. Yeah, they'll eat their native birds. That is true. Yeah, they'll fuck everything up. Plus, you know, the life expectancy of an indoor cat versus an outdoor cat, it's insane.

Well, that's because cats have a, yeah, because there's a natural predator of a cat that only exists outside. Yeah. The car. Yeah. Because cats are dumb. Then they get skittish and they hear a loud noise coming down the road. What if I run in front of it

It's also the natural predator Of the dog I guess Yeah And the guy And some humans Yeah And deer Kangaroos

Kangaroos It's sort of an apex predator Of the animal kingdom When you think about it It's actually at the top Of the food chain At the top of the food chain It'd be a train

Because that could kill a car Under the right circumstances Trains will absolutely Destroy a car Yeah that's chain would be a train, because that could kill a car. Under the right circumstances. Trains will absolutely destroy a car. Yeah, that's true. Nothing kills a train. But it's like, would a boat be a car of the sea? Well. No, I think a boat is one step down from a car.

Or would a submarine be the train of the car? No. The submarine can destroy a boat. sea. Because a submarine can destroy a boat. Yeah, but a boat There's lots of different kinds of boats where I think that falls apart.

Yeah. There's no boat that is a car. Well, a submarine could take out a cruise liner. I think a submarine, there is no boat a submarine couldn't take out.

But there's no car equivalent of the submarine. I don't think it's a one-to-one. Planes are the trains of the sky, though. That we can agree on. Oh, you've got one. If you had some kind of awesome system

where you had a lot of planes connected to each other, that would be the trains of the sky. Yeah, that's fair. There's no train of the sea. I would say when there is a... What film was this in where the president. Air Force One. Air Force One.

Where the president climbs from a rope from plane to plane. Is this the one where Steven Seagal gets sucked off into the air? Is it the one where Harrison Ford is the president? Whatever the one is where they have to refuel the plane in mid-air, and so they connect the plane by a fuel line, and in a sense the two planes are connected. I think that's Air Force One. If that is the case, then I would say

that could be a train. Yes, I think that's fair. Yeah, the president's aircraft is a train. Well, this episode's gone to a lot of different places. Yeah, and all of them good. And on that note, I've been Joel. I've been Jackson.

I've also been Joel. And this has been another episode of Plumbing the Death Star, Lady and the Tramp, Big Tick, done. Yeah. Found out about the beaver asshole. They do taste like vanilla and raspberry. So if you've full-on ruined a beaver. You can squeeze it out, basically.

But you can get them out of dead beavers. But yeah, as I suspected the equivalent like the economic cost yeah it's harder to get it from beaver than it is to say

growing vanilla bean well that's very strange it makes sense though yeah eat a vanilla bean you can grow vanilla bean yeah yeah yeah you can't grow a bean

you can farm beavers for their arseholes yeah and then you can rim every single one of them I mean you ring them out I'm guessing like a spun probably a be their arseholes. Yeah, and then you can rim every single one of them. I mean, you ring them out, I'm guessing, like a sponge. Probably a beaver arsehole just tastes like beaver shit.