Plumbing the Death Star - How Did P!nk's House Get So Full of Evil Clowns?

Episode Date: July 24, 2016

In which our heroes are haunted by past decisions, live through nightmares and attempt to solve our hellish lives with arson while asking how did P!nk's house get so full of evil clowns? Join your favourite pop music fans as they attempt to understand a deeper meaning behind every single lyric, misunderstand the point of metaphors and discuss the royal you, royal we and the royal singular us. Jackson figures out the perfect amount of clowns to allow in your house, Zammit likes the idea of one person running from a thousand bulls and Duscher just wants to flaunt his university education. Buckle in for another top tier episode that everyone has been clamouring for! You're welcome fans.Want to help us investigate the clown rash phenomenon? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can receive your (possible) fun house.And don’t forget to purchase your copies of Dinosaur Park and Boone Shepard over at https://sanspantsradio.podkeep.com. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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also at sanspantsradio.podkeep.com Get it now for the limited time only price of just £5. But, if that's too expensive for you, we'll also be releasing it chapter by chapter as a podcast in its own RSS feed. So just search for Boone Shepard in iTunes and the first three chapters should be available right now. Now, enjoy the show. Hey everyone and welcome to this week's episode of Plumbing the Death Star, where we ask important questions. Like, how did Pink's house get so full of evil clowns?

So I think we can probably learn from the lyrics of Pink's fun house how her house got so infested with clowns. So I guess the main issue

With this song Is the chorus Which is the majority Of the song This used to be a funhouse But now It's full of clowns It's just

Chockers That's a shame That's a bummer It's time to start The countdown I'm gonna burn it down Down First off

How else are you gonna Get rid of an infestation Of clowns Seems like Pink Feels like she has to do this alone. Yeah. She's the one, but she's not like, hey, if it was me and I discovered my house was to the brim. Full of just chuckers of evil clowns.

Evil clowns. I might call someone. I'd call an exterminator. Pink is like, I've got to burn it down. So I feel like this is not the kind of thing that gradually happened. Because. But you just like one day open your eyes and there's evil clowns literally everywhere. It the kind of thing where she sees one evil clown she's like oh for one evil clown you see there's at least five under the fridge exactly um so i feel like it's gonna have happened fairly

recently but let's let's go through the lyrics okay okay okay i dance around this empty house no clowns yet all right that's i notice okay that's good tear down, throw you out Maybe there is some Screaming down the halls Spinning all around And now we fall I just read that being like whatever This is an empty house There's nothing really here to do We're going to tear us down

Her and the house Make the singular us The royal single us The royal singular us Throw you out like the house Make the singular us The royal single us The royal singular us Throw you out Like the house is just It's a decrepit house It's falling apart

It's not great But it's her You know It's whatever And maybe this is what Attracts clowns Like clowns Like evil clowns

Sorry Evil clowns Because there are Good clowns in this world Like a moth to a flame They see an empty house An empty house And so evil clowns Like ooh there There Good Okay but here we go Like a moth to a flame They see an empty house A derelict house

And so evil clowns are like Ooh there There? Good Okay but here we go Here's a confusing little verse Pictures framing up the past Okay

Okay so there are pictures in this old house of the past A past You're taunting smoke behind the glass Sounds like a clown smile See I'm imagining a glass coffin with a dead clown in it. I don't know about you boys, but that's just what's running through my brain right now. Picture framing of the past. Look, you're torn. Yep, okay. Well, maybe. No, no, no.

Oh, well, I'm an idiot. The paintings are full of clowns. Uh-huh. That's the glass, the glass of the painting separating the canvas from their frame. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Museum's full of us. She lives in a museum. It's full of us. Oh! She's already, by this stage oh she's already by this stage she's already burnt

the house down this is referring this is like it's like a prequel right okay I'm in so this is like you know it's you know

when you sort of enter a film in medias res yeah you know action's already happened so we're already entering a house

that's been burnt and now we've got to work out how this happened I'm just going to quickly use four years of uni to say that in medias res means in the middle. You're welcome.

In the middle of action. That's that education. Yeah, look, thank you. Worth it. Thank you, university. Worth every goddamn penny. Okay, so I see what you mean. She's wandering through and there are still some paintings

of the good times she had with the clowns. So again, if you're saying, I danced around this empty house, terrorist dance, or maybe you could start start definitely the second verse is definitely happening after the house is already burnt the first one

you could you could argue that could be arguing maybe as it's happening she's dancing around this empty house as she's burning it's the classic movie move

where it opens with the start of the third act yeah and then it cuts to the start of the movie so she's already dancing around this burning house that kind of stuff and then she's like it's ash everywhere once a tickle now a rash now i think

that refers to the fact that the clowns started small and they spread like one clown in your house you're like whatever maybe he's on he's passing through yeah two evil clowns you're like look i'll get to it i just don't leave any food now there's 30 and now suddenly there's 30 and you're like once that was a tickle Now it's a bloody clown rash Exactly Like one clown Funny Yeah Like hundreds of them

Thousands of them A worry A worry An actual worry You tickled me That was very funny Now it's like an annoying rash You won't fuck off

Imagine running over the balls But if everyone was clowns I was going to say But if it was one person A thousand A thousand balls That's good too They're both good ideas this used to be a fun house so are we saying this is a fun house as in like this house i used to have a lot of fun in yeah or

is it like a carnival fun house once this used to be a carnival well fun house in in my version of the lyrics is one word oh my which would mine is. Which would two words. Oh, boy. That changes everything. So it's a fun house. Is it a fun house or a fun house? These are the tough hitting questions we need to be answered. Well, see, I feel like a fun house makes sense because obviously that would explain why it's full of clowns. Look, no.

Don't get ridiculous. It's pink. She didn't live in a clown house. She didn't live in a fun house. Yeah, that's true. You idiots. Yeah, I think her house. Her house used to be a playground, a fun place.

She used to host kids' birthday parties and that's how the clown got there. Use your head, Jackson. It was a house of fun and that's maybe what attracted the clowns to this one's fun house. They wouldn't hang around if it was a fun house because that's where they work.

Exactly. No one wants to hang out where they work. True. She says it's time to start the countdown. That's where they work. Exactly. No one wants to hang out where they work. True. That's true. She says it's time to start the countdown. That's the next line. Is Pink blowing up the place with dynamite?

She doesn't know how to start fires, that's for sure. Because it goes 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Fun. So are we to assume that she set a timer

for the closing? Or is she counting the clowns? 1, 2, 3, 4. But then why is she counting down? Is she killing the clowns or is she counting it down? Why does it end with fun if they're evil clowns? One, two, three, four. But then why is she counting down? Is she killing the clowns or is she counting it down? Why does it end with fun if they're evil clowns? That's true.

Surely that's the opposite. Or they're running out of the building on fire at this point. Nine clowns? Eight? Nine, seven, six, maybe it's as they die. Yeah, maybe. It's fun again. And then once it gets to one, they're all dead and she's just like, fun.

Good, my house is once again a fun house. Exactly. We no longer have any evil clowns. It's just fun. We've still got a lot of lyrics to go. So yeah, echoes knocking on locked doors, all the laughter from above, I'd rather live out in the street than in this haunted memory. All the laughter from above.

Let's pick apart this line. That's how... Angels. Angels are laughing at pink. See, I figured that the clowns infested from the cladding. Maybe the clowns flew in. Yeah, okay. On the wings of an angel.

Sure. Or something. And the angels flew in. That's how the infestation started. In the attic. Because in the attic, you wouldn't notice until... You're not laying down traps. I mean, that's where they start first. first exactly and you're not thinking about it and suddenly hearing this like from the ceiling like uh is that evil clowns is

that do we have evil clowns this used to be a fun house did you put down the evil clown traps get out fuck that's where the relationship problem started. Fuck, I think we've got evil clowns in the room. Well, see, I read all the laughter from above is in that she can't live in the house anymore because she killed all the clowns and they're all up in heaven laughing at her. But they're evil clowns, Jack. How are they going to be in heaven? I think it's... I think a clown is automatically guaranteed heaven.

But they're evil clowns I think as a clown That's true God loves clowns That is a fact we have to agree on Send in the clowns Yeah, there's Laffy Daffy, it's still there Okay, so Echo's knocked

Echo's knocking on locked doors So again, if you have an attic And maybe they've like, oh we didn't put the clown traps down Let's just put like a lock on the attic door. And that's why they're knocking because they want to get down. And they're laughing because that's what clowns do. They're laughing boys. They're laughing boys.

They're chuckly lads. Yeah, they're like. It's good. That's what's going to be happening up above you. You're like, fuck. See, I read this whole verse as being her memory of the event. I'd rather live out in the streets and dealing with this knocking and laughing bullshit than this haunted memory.

Oh, she put them in the attic and burnt them. Oh, that makes a lot of sense. Makes a lot of sense. Or she smoked them out. They did come out. 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. She burnt the house down and all the smoke rose up into the attic, smoked them out. That's how you go to clowns.

So I think Pink in this... I mean, I know Pink is probably quite rich, but she's got movers and maids. Why would Pink call them movers? Because she burned down the house to get rid of the evil clown problem. No, no, but they're trying to exorcise the place. If I was trying to exorcise the place of evil clowns, and again, I'm assuming this takes place before the massacre. Yes. I don't know if I'd call movers.

Yeah, movers is a strange thing to call. Even maids is a bit odd. Like a priest may be pink. Or a ringleader of a circus. Yeah, or a pied piper. Although this could be my favorite lyric. Or a bull. My favorite lyric ever.

So I called the movers, called the maids. We tried to exercise this. We'll try to exercise this place. Oh yeah, because the movers and ma the maids. We try to exercise this. We'll try to exercise this place. Oh yeah, because the movers and maids are helping. Yep. This rhyme. Drag my mattress to the yard. Crumble, tumble, house of cards.

Well, see, all that's happening there is that they haven't bothered exercising the evil clowns and they just sat down playing card games. It's a friendly game of poker. They were like, look, we'll try to exercise this place. But Pinky's like, what if I drag my were like, look, we'll try to exercise this place, but Pink is like, what if I drag my mattress into the yard and we just play cards on it? I think that's probably

what's actually occurred here. Yeah. I think that's fair to assume about Pink and her house full of evil clowns. Because again, she's calling movers and maids not a priest or a circus ringleader. Is it ringleader or ringmaster?

Ringmaster. So she should have called a priest and a ringmaster. Yeah, true. Because they could sort out the evil clowns. Exactly. The priest would have made them normal clowns, non-evil clowns, and the ringmaster would have led them down. And that's the problem.

She just called the wrong people. The next verse is very hard to explain. It's just silly. Okay. It used to be a fun house full of evil clowns. It's time to start the countdown. I'm going to go to that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's fine 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 Fun Leaving the murder clown situation again Yep Oh I'm crawling through the doggy door To escape Yeah

Because she's locked all the house Like she's just locked all the doors My key don't fit the lock no more Who changed the lock No no no The lock's melted There's a fire Oh in the fire

The lock got hot and melted Yep Or she's In her mixed up brain. Because she clearly, when you have a house infestation. She's burnt down the wrong house, guys. I'm going to say. Oh, no.

As soon as you have evil clowns in your roof, and they are laughing, you are not getting sleep. True. Okay? So they're going to keep you up all night. And they're going to make you a little bit weary. Maybe you're going to do some wrong decisions. And maybe you burn down your neighbor's house. Maybe you burn down your neighbor's house because you think it your neighbor's house Because whoopsie daisies wrong house

I'll break the plates I'll find a new place Burn this fucker down Because again she's stuck Maybe she burned the neighbor's house She's changing the drapes so that they think Someone else has moved in next door Why doesn't this work

I'll crawl through the doggy door Maybe realizing my house doesn't even have a doggy door. She's just, I think. She's evil clown addled. It happens to the best of us. I know, it's just one of those things that happens when your,

when your house, when your house gets infested with evil clowns, you just get a little bit addled brain, a little bit of clown addled. You get clown brain. You get clown brain. And then you're like, I think this is my house.

Let's burn it down. And so she's burning down a completely innocent house. Yep. That has no evil clowns That's what a cleaser is Let's talk about the next verse Do do do Do do do

Do do do do do Do do do do Do do do do do do Da da da da Do do do do do do do 987654321 She's lost her mind That is the clear clown brain

The clowns drove pink inside Look this is This is the clown brain After she's burned down her neighbour's house Oh you know what it would have been She stood outside Watched this house burn And she starts laughing

And then laughing And then she can't stop And then she's become an evil clown Then she's the evil clown That's the danger of evil clown That's how they infect you You know what There was never any evil clowns

She was the evil clown The whole time The evil clown was the evil clown The whole time The evil clown was the evil clown Once it tickled now rash He's talking about She's out with her friends Maybe Somebody makes a joke

She's like What was that? No no no It gets even worse We're talking about evil clowns in the attic She's in the attic The evil clown That's why the key doesn't fit

Because she's in the attic Of someone else's fucking house Being an evil clown And That's why the key doesn't fit. Because she's in the attic of someone else's fucking house. Pink is the evil clown. And she burned down their house. And she just burns down a fucking house. And the chorus isn't sung from Pink's point of view. That's true. Or the first two lines aren't.

Or the first two lines maybe. And again, she's talking, know You know Nine eight Seven six five Four three two one Like burning it down Fun Like because She's an evil clown She's having a lot of fun

Burning down a house Does it change any If we assume that It's a fun house Not a fun house This is a fun house Because I have fun house Blah blah blah

It used to be fun They're just Gonna burn it down Down down Gonna burn it down Yeah I reckon She's an evil clown I am convinced

You cannot convince me Otherwise That pink In this song Within the context of Fun house Of fun house I'm going to burn it down, down, down. I'm going to burn it down. Yeah, I reckon she's an evil clown. I am convinced. You cannot convince me otherwise. The pink in this song, within the context of Funhouse. Because her key does not fit in the lock anymore, which means that this is clearly not her house, that she has been infected by some kind of evil clown gas. Some kind of evil clown gas, yeah. Joker gas, maybe? Just putting that out there

Is she Harley Quinn I'm reading it with that in mind That makes sense if it's a fun house Not a fun house I dance around this empty house Terrorists down throw you out Talking about the Joker Screaming down the halls

Also so does Harley Quinn Spinning all around and now we fall. That's a classic Harley move. Pictures framing up the past. Because her and, you know, her pudding. Your taunting smirk behind the glass. Oh, that's the Joker in a heartbeat. This museum full of ash wants to tickle

now. Rash may be referring to their relationship early on. She's like, oh, who is this curious man? She was just tickling him a bit and then, you know, then it turned into into a basic rash. Because it's an unhealthy relationship. This used to be a fun house. In the early days of The Joker and Harley Quinn, they were having a blast. What's another word for a madhouse?

That's true. A fun house. Funny farm. Funny farm. So you find those together. Fun house. House full of evil clowns. Time to start the countdown.

I'm going to burn it down, down, down. She's burning down Arkham. She's burning down Arkham Asylum. Fuck, she's in Arkham. Echo's knocking on locked doors. All the laughter from before. Echo's knocking on locked doors because in Arkham, they're all locked doors and all the inmates will be banging on them.

I'd rather live out on the street in Gotham. In Gotham. Than in this haunted memory. All the laughter from above. Now, is Arkham from my memory? They have the main place. Yeah. Like where all the, like, you know, the main visages and all that kind of stuff.

Yeah, and then below is where they keep the villains. So, all the laughter doesn't necessarily refer to the Joker. It just refers to the happy, pleasant life that the orderlies and the basic inmates are having. Or it depends where the Joker is. And that place, you know, when she was in position to. Because if she, you know, Joker was, like, kept in an above, whatever. Or, like, Batman. You know, it puts me to laugh coming from down from above.

Well, they tend to keep the like special inmates below yeah so the laughter from above would yeah I don't know that's a confusing well no no

it makes sense because like inmates above like Harley Quinn like would hear laughter anyway yeah all the time

constantly and it'd be like mocking her because like she's underground away from the Joker but also

away from society everything above her yeah true still fits I reckon I've called the movers Called the maids Orderlies

And nurses Yep We'll try to exercise this Please Arkin Get this Drag my mattress to the yard To my house Where I'm sleeping

To the yard Outside into Gotham Trumble Trumble Trumble Trumble House of cards House of cards

The Joker Is a card In the card deck Yep She could be making A whole card Out of A whole house Out a whole house of, you know, out of playing cards. The Joker's one that makes her fall down. Yep. I'm, oh, I'm crawling through the doggy door, either escaping Arkham in a complicated way,

or she had two hyenas she treated like dogs. So there's that. I would say escaping from Arkham. My key don't fit the lock no more. She used to work at Arkham. At Arkham as Dr. Quinzel, whatever her name, Quinzel Quattle.

Harleen Quinzel, but good. No, no, no, the Mayan god. Quetzalcoatl, yeah, sure. But yes, she used to work there, so the key doesn't fit anymore.

Yeah, and also like, hey, if we're talking about maybe she's sick, this house is full of evil clowns, so maybe she's deciding that her and the Draco's relationship is unhealthy. It's like, this key don's deciding that her and the Joker's relationship is unhealthy. This key doesn't fit the lock no more.

She means the love we used to have, it's gone. The key to my heart. The key to my heart doesn't fit anymore, Joker. We're done. I'll break the plates. Find a new place. Find a new villain or my own place to be my own villain. She hooks up with Deadshot.

Come on, make some point. And Poison Ivy. Poison Ivy. They're all chumps. Burn this fucker down referring to burning I'm assuming either Arkham or her and Joker's

relationship or Gotham or Gotham do do do do do do is a really easy thing to imagine Harleen Quinzel with her like

or whistling do do do do do as she like burns down it's quite fun for a villainous lass with like a fucking giant mallet just smacking shit around

I think this song is about Harley Quinn and the Joker. I think you are correct. I think I called it and then you guys tried to laugh me out of the place and nah. You were like, lol, this is a joke. No, you're so right. You have never been more right. Pink in her song Funhouse is

singing about bloody Joker and Harley Quinzel aka Harley Quinn. And I think it's all to do. You can either take it very literal or very metaphorical being like, again, my key doesn't fit, which is a very big clue.

Yeah. Either the fact that, you know, talking about people in relationship and syncing up and that kind of stuff, like exactly my heart or my literal key to Arkham Asylum doesn't fit anymore. Cause I used to be a doctor here. I used to work and be very high up here. Don't fit anymore.

Cause they, you know, changed the locks on me. Cause I went crazy. I went nuts. And now I used to work and be very high up here. Don't fit anymore because they, you know, changed the locks on me because I went crazy. Exactly. I went nuts and now I'm not allowed back in Arkham Asylum. Unless I'm in... Or it's, I mean, or it's about a literal infestation. Or evil clowns. Or

evil clowns just literally everywhere. In Pink's house and she's just like, this is a mess because... Or maybe Pink and her husband had a divorce and then she's angry about it but that seems dumb at this i don't think that seems like hot nonsense i don't believe that's the case me neither yeah so quinn gets my vote yeah so how did um pink's house get so full of evil clowns it's arkham asylum i think it's arkham asylum and that's where you put evil clowns in the fun house

exactly or the mad house or the big house the big house the big fun house that Exactly. Or the mad house. Or the big house. The big house. The big fun house. That's what they call it. It's puzzling that it's like this used to be a fun house. This used to be an asylum but now it's full of evil clowns. No, it used to be a fun house. She used to love her job.

Oh yeah, true. Or this could be talking about the events of one of the many times when the Joker's like no, I'm going to take over Arkham Asylum. Yeah, that's true. I'm thinking it used to be a fun house basically because

Or this is one of the times that the Joker's taken over Arkham Asylum. Definitely Arkham Asylum, Joke and Carly play a huge role in this. I'm thinking it used to be a fun house, being... I used to go to work here, it was a lot of fun. I was really good at my job. I really enjoyed it. I would call this a fun house kind of thing.

Do you call a madhouse a fun house, or am I just making that up? No, or am i just like making that up you can't people call it the funny farm if they want i'm pretty sure the joke has called arkham the fun house before yeah it would if if he did it wouldn't okay i wouldn't seem out of place for yeah exactly the fun house it could also if you wanted to get more literal with it be a fight between the joker and Firefly the fire themed villain from Batman just like you can read it kind of like that you know it's like a museum

full of ash burning down your place well there's a lot of times where Arkham Asylum does get abandoned yeah

and so they do go in too much to be honest build a new place yeah and they sort of come back in and it's all just decrepit and like

you know falling to pieces and shit like that then it's a museum full of ash yeah but Firefly doesn't seem the right type to write songs and i don't think pink knows who firefly is i feel like if i asked pink she'd be like who are you there's that so yeah i think um maybe even possibly one of the many times that harley quinn has thought the joker has been killed And so, you know, she's going down,

burning an Arkham Asylum in his memory. And a bit sad that maybe this museum full of ash... Just putting that out there. I think it's very possible. I think that's almost 100% the case. I think we solved it. And on that note, I've been Joel. I've been Jackson.

And I've also been Joel. This used to be a fun house. Now it's full of evil clowns. So many fucking evil clowns. So many fucking evil clowns. Or just one. Really. Yeah. Just that one evil clown bastard. 9, 8, 7, 6, 5,

4, 3, 2, 1, fun. I'm gonna burn it down. If you think this show is worth at least a dollar, why not donate to our Patreon account? Follow the links on our website,