Plumbing the Death Star - How Would You Defeat Bowser as a Regular Man?

Episode Date: June 15, 2025

DISCLAIMER, This episode is actually about what celebrities are most like 'the general vibe of a dad'.Links to everything at https://linktr.ee/plumbingthedeathstar including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey everyone and welcome to this week's episode of Plum in the Death Star a comedy pop culture podcast for everyone who's thumbs a crayon Yeah, this is that's right. It's a thumb cramps crossover episode. Well, it works Hey, hey, sorry crossovers. Yeah. Yeah, so I'm 90s big now Yeah, so this is this is one of the deaths though. It's a comedy pop culture podcast That was the most important questions, but it's also crossover with another podcast, Thumb Cramps, because we've got very special guests. Joel Duescher and Jackson Bailey, the two hosts of Thumb Cramps here today. Hey, where are you? I'm also here. I'm Joel's amit.

You're the host today. Yeah, I'm the host apparently. Hey everybody, welcome to this week's episode of Climbing the Dester. We ask the important question like, how would you defeat Bowser as a regular man? How would you kill? That's the last episode of a Thumb Grapple crossover. About Bagpuss? I feel like it's kind of very like weirdly Sans Pants lore. Yeah, that's true. Because like we've hated Bagpuss? I feel it's kind of very like weirdly sans-pens lore. Yeah, it's like we've had bagpuss for years

Ever since I wrote about him in a magazine. Yeah, on the bus? I would say maybe pre-COVID. Yeah, yeah, yeah And it was like bagpuss just remained like a you know a thorn in our side every now and again you just kind of like Reminisce and think about bagpuss and I'd be like mmmmm and then my wife is British I'd be like what is wrong with your country? Does she know Bagpuss? Oh yeah she knows Bagpuss She loves Bagpuss

and raised her, Bagpuss raised her She'll claim like I was too young for Bagpuss and that I've never seen an episode I was not born in the 70s my husband lies lies The listeners of this podcast and Tom Cramp's a different podcast that we're crossing over with today. Yeah, uh They're all like your wife's age or younger and they know back push because it's their grandma or whatever

People out here watching TV with their grandma I've never done that in my life, dude. I don't know, it just sounds nice. To watch TV with... When I was a kid, I had friends who were really good friends with their grandparents, and I never understood it. Mmm. I was like, what are you talking...

I have a friend who was like, I can't wait. Next week I get to go and spend a week with my grandma. Yeah, again. No disrespect to my grandma, but like... But okay, when you're a kid... A lot of disrespect to my... They're teenagers, teenagers, teenagers. When you're a teenager, grandma my age is teenagers teenagers when you're a teenager grandma

Maybe a bit lawless doesn't care what time you go to bed. Let's eat all the candy Yeah, depends on ages as well. It would have been about 15 15 year old grandma When you sit come on here, what if a grandma was 15? No, no, it's through adoption, don't worry. Uh, hey! It's grandma! It's grandma! But this time she's 15. But this time? Is she time traveling?

Not 65, not 45, that's right, this time she's 15. I like it. 15 year old grandma. It's still going. Now showing. Now she's in a film? I really like 16 year old grandma. 15!

15, sorry. Excuse me. It's like teen moms but worse. But worse? But then you say, it's through adoption. It's fine, through adoption. Wait, no. why is the adoption agency giving a 15 year old. It's an unethical adoption agency. A 15 year old a grand kid? So she's adopting. She's 15 and she adopted another 15 year old.

No she's 15 and she adopted a 45 year old woman She's 15 and she's my grandma I'm seven I'm the daughter of the 45 year old. Yeah. Yeah, that's really good. Yeah the first first Okay, it's just an adoption agency just I don't know just like yeah like rub jigs are yeah It was a mix-up it was a mix-up The 45 year old woman signed the wrong box that she signed the adopt me box Yeah, adopt adopt what it was like she found the profile of oh wow I'm gonna get to adopt a 15 year old Wait a second. Oh

And then they're doing the 7-year old and that means he's my 16 your 15-old grandma Well, I like it dude, yeah Yes, yeah signed me on for six seasons and I'm sweating in the writers room What you'd have like like like leave it to be the kind of energy Oh like this moral lessons at the end of every leave? Leave It To Beaver is one of those TV shows that I've never seen and always sounds like it's like, kinda how like people say like Electric Boogaloo

was like the very funny punchline to a sequel title. Leave It To Beaver is like the sitcom equivalent of that to me, where it's like, you know, like a sitcom, like, uh, Leave It To Beaver. Leave It To Beaver's from like the 50s. Yeah, he just kind of follows us, you know, little kid, he learns a lesson, a little bit of a, is is he bit of a stinker well

Yeah, I mean be you're not calling a kid beaver if it's not a stinker well They say leave it to be over they mean like leave it to be over to fuck up like this dude I'm gonna make a Dennis the menace type. Yeah, yeah, yeah, which one me. There's two yeah, that's true They're both no good next yeah, they're both fuck fuckhead kids. Yeah, okay, so Bowser. Yeah, okay, so he's uh in canon He is 34 years old okay, okay? Younger man, I see how tall 10 foot tall a man. I see okay anyways six hundred six thousand five hundred kilos What's got a couple a couple killed heavy is that mostly shell I would imagine? I don't know. Pure muscle.

I guess how... How are we killing him? Well how much does a regular... Mario throws him into bombs. How the fuck is a plumoth swinging around six tons? He's picking up a fucking car. No, he's using his momentum against him. He's doing judo.

He's actually using Bowser's weight against him. Bowser lunges forward. Yeah, Mario And then you Simply pivots his heel Uses the weight and you know you could judo an elephant. Yeah That's sort of a vibe here like we're making fun of judo and I love that Yeah, I love that the idea that it's plumbing the Natsunas official opinion that judo is not a real karate Awesome kung fu awesome. Kung Fu, awesome.

Yeah, dude. The one they do the IDF sucks. Yeah, yeah. Fuck that. Krav Maga. Yeah, fuck that one. What about Capoeira? That's pretty cool.

That's dancing and fighting. Yeah, dude. Capoeira's sick. Big fan. You can do like a bit of a like break dancing and kick someone in the face. Yeah, that's so sick, dude. Eddie Gordo. Mmm. Oh. Yeah, that's right.

Taken. Taken, dude. Mmm. I got scared there that it was a virtue fighter reference for some reason I was out of right out of martial arts that I can name Takwondo hey Bo Bo Wing Chung Wing Chung mixed mixed Boxing what's the one? Guy defected, Russia, uh, Steven Seagal, Akito? Yeah, Akito.

Steven Seagal's martial art. Fake. Fake martial art. You just sort of stand there and wait till someone comes up. And then they fall down. It's good. I'd love to learn that. You could probably take a course online for like $1600.

Yeah dude, yeah. Yeah, that's awesome. You get like a 360p video of Steven Seagal sitting in a chair going, alright so the first thing you want to do is, huh! Thank you. And the audio is really crunchy for some reason. I'm like, he's using his computer microphone. You know that one where they say what they're doing while they're doing it, but they yelling it like I can't eat Chop yeah that but not karate chop. It would be I guess a keto show And like you know bullshit throw yeah, I think so Anyway all those we respect

McGraw and judo Pivot your heel Yeah Eat a fucking protein shake, use your own weight. Using someone else's weight, you parasite. So, okay, in, I guess, something that I can understand. How heavy is he? 6,500 kilos.

Yes, you said that before. But what is that weight? What does that mean? Like, how many dogs? Like a plane? Like is this several cars? Yeah, a bus. Yeah, a bus feels right. Like yeah, but that also feels heavy. It feels too heavy for how it's the big, the biggie. Well it's ten foot. Yeah, that's like yeah. I don't have. Almost two dads. Yeah, but two dads. How much is a dad weigh? 200 kilograms? Okay, uh. That's a big dad.

No, a dad's a biggie. How much is it dad way 200 kill? Big dad or you want like a spelt ish that also the ideal dad Let me just quickly into 260 large dogs Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. The average dad weight, I would imagine, this day and age. But what's the ideal dad weight? Oh, ideal dad weight, 85 kilos. 85? That's too, that's too sceptical. No, it's because our dads, they come from a different generation. They're all like 5 foot 8.

What? No one's got a tall dad when they're our age. My old dad's a new. My dad's pretty tall. No, pretty tall no he's not he is how tall is your dad? I'm six foot something right? I'm a bit taller than your dad and I'm six foot on the dot I don't know if my dad, how tall is my dad? You're a small man! Am I small? You're not that small dude! How big am I? You'd be like, wait who's taller of you two? I think we're roughly the same You're rolling around like 5 foot 10

We're like 178 Yeah, that's fine Okay These are my math My dad's taller than me Yeah, I'm 183 Which is 6 foot actually I thought 180 was 6 foot

No, that's 5'11 I believe My dad's taller than me I thought 180 was 6 foot. No, that's 5'11 I believe My dad's taller than me. Yeah, I thought he was 6 foot. I don't know probably he is tall Yeah, you're rolling around 5 foot 10. I was right. Okay. Well, my dad's probably 6 foot. Yeah, that's tall. That's normal I'm 6 foot. I'm not tall. He just said 6 foot's tall dude He just said that old dads were like 5'8 and then you said he's 6 foot now he just said that little dads were like five eight and then you know he's six foot now He's saying that's normal Bitches change the fucking he's changing the goddamn post sorry. I would like to clarify and justify Please

That is tall for a dad uh-huh of our caliber of that. Are you saying that's got to but yes I am saying dad's got taller So I hate that is right because yeah generationally we just keep getting tall that's and our dicks are getting smaller or something Penis size is decreasing. Yeah, I don't know. I think it's fabulous We got micro plastics in our nuts. Yeah, that's great. No, but why is that dick getting smaller? I understand that like we're getting taller business by like probably because the length of our dick is going into our legs now or something This is saying the same size, but we're getting tall so proportionally Therefore if you like, you know, once you shave, yeah

Perspective, you know, yeah Dads are getting taller Dix are getting smaller. Those are two Foot is a good dad like dad size in terms of like height six. I agree wait though I was gonna say like yeah, we're getting like I'm like a like a portly dad like a beer belly dad Well, you're gonna if you're going six foot beer belly dad you're looking at probably 120. Yeah What kind of dad we doing for our dad mess? Like a six foot the ideal kilogram. Oh, yeah, like what is the in a lab, you know, you know somewhere in Sweden, you know There's like a dad on a shoe. Well, like there's the dad is the idea of lab, you know, you know somewhere in Sweden, you know, there's like a dad on a scale We're like there's the dad is the perfect dad six foot what he's kind of what kind of like what kind of physique

We say I think the ideal dad is barrel-chested Yeah, and in maybe gone old. Yeah, we're looking like yeah, like what like John Ham. Yeah from John Ham proportions What what? You're creating a dealf, not a dad. You have created a Dilf? Yes. Not gonna lie, I may have done that. Yes.

But is a Dilf the ideal dad? I would argue no. For me, yes. But not the ideal dad. Why isn't a Dilf the ideal dad? I don't know. Well, cause you're not looking at it as a dad. I mean, you are. But you're looking at it as, it's not your dad.

Yeah. Your dad shouldn't be a Dilf to you. Correct. Yeah, but yes. I mean, hey, I're looking at is it it's not your dad. Yeah, your dad shouldn't be a dill to you Yeah, I That's on me that's a thing that we didn't need to say Stances on milfs and it being the same. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So alright ideal dad I've become lost in the weeds. Yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Again 45 you see that like you have sort of either sort of adult kids if you had kids at a younger age you have Like teenager kids you had him sort of like you know Later or you have maybe even like a younger kids if you had them but you but 45 feels like a good dad

I feel like worked in is it yeah, you've been a dad for some time All right for me we're going older like 45 year old dad. Yeah, you know it into it 52 52 year old dad. Yeah, you know it into it 52 Dad no Unless something goes horribly wrong for you in your future You will be a 52 year old and many dads are a 50 I'd like to clarify in the situation things going wrong your kids fine. You just die I've met your baby. He's very strong You don't need to worry about it. Oh, yeah

Somehow he ends up on the road worry about the car Action comics number one. Yeah, why? And then you throw a car at me yeah, yeah, why is he he'll take on Bowser? Yeah Yeah, so I think if what 52 to me just feels too old for the ideal that 52 smoker five foot 52 smoker you're doing his John Ham but it's direction for that's unbelievable Dude, I telling me you don't want a little smoking dad? I've come around 3'4 Little smoking dad Little smoking dad

What you doing today? Smoking cigarettes Oh yeah Took up smoking at the age of 7 And stopped growing And now he's a little Smoking dad That's a little smokin' dad That's fuckin' beautiful dude. Oh my god. I love little smokin' dad. Yeah, that's my ideal dad. Yeah, I've settled on it

Fitting the palm of your hand Yeah, three, oh you're fitting the palm of your hand One foot One foot exactly. Look at him balance. Size of three apples. Yeah, three apple store, smoke and cigarette. Or two cigarette store. He can sit on the cart in like a stall. And he can give me advice or whatever. That's nice, he sits on the cart and he opens it up.

Pulls one out. Lights out. Should you be smoking that? Yeah, keeps me healthy, keeps me small. And they say... Okay. little smoking dad You know have this problem at school. He's like my life experience is so different to yours. I can never offer Smoking I'm sort of like a gnome. I

Just I've lived such a different life kid, okay? What about Ed Harris is the ideal dad Ed Harris is one he seems like a stern dad no he seems more like I don't know we look maybe this is a little bit too much but I say Ed Harris granddad oh yeah I can see that active granddad he does have granddad vibes runs a marathon that kind of granddad dude this is falling into this is falling into Dilf territory game but I was gonna go Pierce Brosnan 00 007 era, but that is full on DILF era. That's extreme DILF.

So I'm so sorry, but I keep thinking of DILF. Alec Baldwin won 30 Rock. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He gives me more uncle energy. Rich uncle. Stop imagining his personality and imagine him physically. I am, I am, I am. Dads aren't in suits unless I'm wedding or a funeral is happening. Yeah, he's like, yeah, he's my dad's more successful physically. Yeah That's not in suits

More successful brother Steven Baldwin's a dad Nicholas cage's body to know that's a good that's scary Younger brother that I'm scared of Which act is the most like a dad? What about Walton Goggins? That? That's uncle.

That's uncle. That's full on uncle. Excuse me, sir. That's like tropical uncle. Timothy Olyphant. Dad, deal. Oh, fuck it up again. But also like not even, I don't even see him as uncle.

Yeah, that's just like hot boyfriend I have at home. Okay, fuck. Uncle yeah, that's just like hot boyfriend. I you know What's what's celebrity is I don't say Tom Hanks cuz he's a boring as fuck guy yeah Well, you say Tom Hanks what era Tom Hanks yeah, none of them none of them a dad. Yeah, I agree I don't think Tom Hanks in here hasn't gone uncle. Yeah, he went from guy to granddad. Yeah, 100% agree dude. 100% agree. Fuck Tom Hanks. I'll say it. I'm sick of him. I like Tom Hanks. Everyone likes Tom Hanks, but he robs me the wrong way. I don't know why. Yeah. Matt Damon? Think about it.

No. He feels like my son. I was like, Matt Damon feels like a brother. Give it a couple of years. Probably Ben Affleck, but he's not quite there yet. Yeah, okay. Yeah, Ben Affleck. He's not quite there. Yeah, okay. Yeah Ben Affleck is like sad. Yeah Yeah, I can see Ben Affleck like holding my balloon while I run around at the plate smoking a cigarette. Yeah Normal size smoking dad Ben Affleck's no normal size. He's broad as a fucking If I found out the Ben Affleck to aid six point five They have to reinforce every set with steel so that he can barely walk

Coming into the lot scraping along the ground Oh Ben Affleck's how'd you get so heavy protein loading Eatin other dads or like actors that could be like, oh yeah. What about... what about... David Harbour. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's pretty dad-shaped. And he doesn't give me uncle either. I will say say and this is not a detracted to him being dad But he and this is maybe crazy. He seems like someone else's dad Yeah, but that's what we're talking about. Yeah, okay. No, but you know what I mean? He's not your dad. He's not my dad No, I know. Your dad's John. No, but I don't mean my dad John Bailey

I mean, he's not your dad if even though he might be your dad He doesn't feel like you're he's like the kid's dad that you go over and he's like full of like, you know Good advice. Yeah, he helps you out. He's a neighbor boy's dad. He's be your dad, he doesn't feel like your... He's like the kid's dad that you go over and he's like full of like good advice. He helps you out. He's a neighbor boy's dad. He's not my dad. That's David Alba. I don't know what that means, but that's the energy I... He kind of has that vibe of like maybe, you know, like if you're, you know, it's like

the dad that would help the kid who's like dad is not in the picture. Yeah, exactly. Or like I go over and he's like he's explaining that at his house they do something that I'm not allowed to do at my house. That's the kind of dad like, oh we can watch TV while we eat dinner here at the harbor residence. I could eat TV. I could eat food. You could eat TV. I could eat TV. Yeah yeah yeah. I was thinking about- What about Fassbender? No I was just looking at him as well. Not dad. He's like he's not even uncle. He's just guy I know. Yeah He's like guy I know or mom's boyfriend. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he's mom's boyfriend

What about Timothy elephant falls under as well? Yeah mom's boyfriend big time Now, yes, I would say that a couple of years ago when he was the age that we're claiming dad should be he would never be a dad But now okay, what about Clooney? Going from mom's boyfriend to dad yeah, I've called him father. I think he'd love that I can see that for Clooney now that he's like full on gray. Yeah He's gonna he's like let himself go a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I, yeah I think he could be dead and if you put clean and he's like five foot ten Yeah, he does have a huge head you're

Tall is George And you'll see he loves pranks yes classic Yes. Classic dad move. Classic dad move. George? Shooting your friends little boys. Classic dad. Say your cat's sick or whatever. Yeah dude. Classic dad. Okay, according to fucking Hollywood,

and there is no way this is true, act is fucking full of shit. Yeah. Clooney's 5'11". The same height as Brad Pitt. Brad Pitt's like a head and shoulders taller than Clooney. Yeah, that's weird Also, George is a dad's name

George Costanza George Costanza is my dad my life's about to be very bad George but that shape. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, George, you know, it's everything you said from personnel. George Cassandra is a dad's name. Yeah. Jerry Seinfeld, not a dad. No, George Cassandra. Is my dad Jerry? Are you kidding me?

No, thank you. But like, yeah, George Cassandra is balding. Yeah, yeah. You know, he's always like he's got a job that we don't really know what it is. He's angry.

He's always frustrated. He seems world weary. I would also say that personality and actions aside, Michael Richards looks like a dad. Yes. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, and Michael's a dad's name Michael is my dad's name Exactly, dude, except Kramer is my crime. Oh is not a damn is my dad. Although This is my dad Cosmo. Yeah. All right. I'm just I'm in some hippie situation This is my dad Jerry. I'm laughing that person out of their own home. Okay

Jerry yeah, my dad Jerry. What if what if it was Gerald Seinfeld? That's fine What if you had your kid called Cosmo then that I'm fucking up that kid This is my son Cosmo Bailey You seem like the type of guy that would call your kid Cosmo. Yeah, dude, maybe or Kramer Bailey That's I feel like with we as friends, yeah, you have to be like you haven't signed anything like you haven't Yeah, my favorite you know tiny tiny I know but you haven't saw it like tiny we call with that Yeah, I'm actually calling him Jerry George George Cosmo Bailey away. Yeah I've changed my last name to Bailey Elaine. Yeah.

Yeah. Look, I've come around. From Black Saturday, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Just calling it Kramer? Not great. Yeah. Jerry George, though.

Wow. Jerry George. Hey, this is my dad Jerry George. Oh, Jerry George. I respect Jerry George. Jerry George is a great name. Oh, man. Anyway, at this point, people are

wondering why they listen to Plum in the Next Door. Yeah. It comes a point in every episode yeah except unfortunately for well i guess hey they pressed play that's one download yeah yeah um gotcha yeah so bowser yeah how are we taking this turtle out so okay so we've discussed this but the way that mario usually does it or at least the most famous methods i would say this to 64 sure well there's two. Mario 64, sure. Well there's the Mario 64 method which is picking him up by his tail, throw him into a bomb. Yep. That seems hard to do as a regular man, because again, we've already established he's 10 foot 2,

and he weighs 6,500 kilos, which is the same size as 260 large dogs. Yeah, okay. The other way Mario does it is break his bridge so he falls into lava. That seems easier. Yeah. Breaking a bridge. You've got to touch an axe. Yeah. Why has he got an axe next to a road bridge that he's standing on? I don't know. Kempting fate. Yeah. That's as a fucking idiot. It's like keeping a loaded gun on your bedside table. With the barrel pointed towards your head. Yeah, it's like a rise and grind kind of mindset, man.

Because if that axe wasn't there, he'd be safe. Exactly. He'd be fine. He'd be going through life. He needs the threat. Just being like, everything I have and need is right here. There's nothing that could take me down. That axe there, that is providing a sharp edge for him to have a sharp mind.

Wait, the axe is behind him. Yeah. I had it in front of in front of his chamber. Yeah, I had the axe in front of him You gotta go on the bowser. Oh, it's kind of like having a gun safe. Yeah Exactly, dude, and maybe he uses yeah, he never uses the axe, but maybe his plan is to keep use that axe himself Yeah, Mario's actually yeah Invaders or whatever like let me go to my axe safe. Yeah, exactly. He can also be killed by fireballs. So the fact that he falls into lava probably spells bad news

if he's weak to fire. He shouldn't be. He shoots fire. Yeah, I know. But if I have a gun and I shoot a gun, I'm not immune to bullets. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But you don't shoot bullets from your belly.

That's true. You don't regurgitate bullets and spit them out. Yeah, yeah. But you are weak to punches. Yeah, that you don't shoot bullets from your belly. That's that over your gurgitate boards and spit them out Yeah, but you are weak to punches. Yeah, that's true But if I was to get like like say a stomach acid on my face That would be bad. That would be bad. You would get sick It would melt my face. Yeah, but I feel like it wouldn't be good. Yeah What what I'm learning is that Bowser's weak to like traditional damage that mm-hmm Because you can shoot him with your fireballs you can throw him into a bomb if he falls in lava

He dies I mean ideally you probably throw a bomb at him seems easy Yeah, that's true stick a dynamite step one then acquire a bomb yeah Make my own bomb but to get to Bowser in that situation, I will need to go through like a level. You gotta jump over holes. Yeah. I think it's far more likely I'm gonna burn to a crisp. I got it. I'm gonna take a new method. Okay. One that was made famous at the Bunda Eve Classic.

Bunda Eve Classic. Okay. So, we know that Bowser likes having a Mario Kart. Okay. Loves it. So, the Bwnda Yv Classic in episode one, The Phantom Menace, that's Darth Maul, yippee. Yeah.

There's a lot of stakes in that race and you see the people getting around, just like fucking around with pod races, I'm missing podcasters, that's us. Yeah. I'll fuck around with pod pod races. I'm missing podcasters. That's us. Yeah I'll fuck around with pod races almost did it again. Anyway, um So that you know at the very start of the race some of the pod races just explode. Yeah So mario kart anacus cookbook. Yeah Okay, okay Uh, we might not even need a car bomb. We can just like, you know, be like mechanics. Yeah.

And like try to fix up your car. We're not a toad. Do you need to be a toad? Or a shy guy? Can I wear a shy guy mask? Just a big shy guy. Wear a big shy guy. Yeah.

I'm a big shy guy. Don't worry about it. Okay, so then you imagine we cut the brakes. I feel like you're gonna cut the brakes. That's, you know, you put a bomb in the car. Well, you cut the brakes and then if that doesn't work, you put a bomb in the car. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You see what I, have you played Mario Kart?

Yeah. I've played Mario Kart. I've played Mario Kart. I've in the car. Yeah, you see what I have you play Mario Cart yeah, also happy release week to a Mario Kart world Mario Cards big now Yeah, this is brought to you by Nintendo We said you're sponsoring this episode Yeah, we said you're sponsoring this episode What would be associated with you we got you we don't send you money so we can't sponsor you I said we sent you send us games Sponsorship just ask the tax man

Yeah So yeah sponsored by Nintendo. Thank you so much Nintendo. Yeah, everyone should pre-order a Nintendo switch to yeah I'll buy one now because they're out Anyway, yeah, you're cutting you saying cut the brakes it will work Yeah, cuz in Mario cut fucking lacquer tube will just pick if he falls in a hole Why don't you say zoom if he crashes into a wall nothing happens? Okay, so I'm guessing Yes, there's a little like a weakness in this Yes Okay, so I'm guessing is there's a little like a weakness in this Yes

Jackson could probably dress like I could like like like it dude. Would you fall through the cloud though? I just wear it Dick out Although are you good with a fishing rod? I've never tried I could be Needs to be yeah, what about yeah exactly Well, you might be killing more than Bowser though because like a two okay So you take it out like you like to make an omelet so okay, so my plan was just simply bombing bomb starts to ignition from our car And I say the IRA sends their regards nice nice nice

bowser loved, i mean his royalty! yeah dude bowser probably loved margaret thatcher, let's be honest dude the IRA would have got him, and they should have yeah the IRA should have taken out bowser cooper, king of, what's he even king of? does he have any claim

to the fucking throne? No, that's just... He's fucking... He's king of England basically. Fuck him. What claim does he have to the throne? What do you mean? He doesn't have a claim to the throne. He's just trying to overthrow to just put himself in... He's called King Bowser.

Yeah, but he's the king of fucking... He's the king of the Coopers, I guess. So I guess it's Coopaland? Like how fucking Ganondorf is a prince. He's prince of the the coopers. Yeah, so I guess is Cooper land. Yeah, like how fucking Ganondorf is a prince Yeah, yeah, he's prince of the fucking gerudos. Yeah Yeah, the house is a king of the coopers. This is the same shit like how fucking Prince Andrew was the prince of the pedophile. Yeah King

And the royal family knew and did nothing about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I already Okay, so you blow up Bowser yeah great Mario goes oh no one, but he's one bomb gonna be enough. Yeah, well he takes three at the end of Super Mario 60 Yeah, yeah, yeah, I think it like again like again. I like this. There's no direct like Combat because you're right. He's a he's gonna be heavy to yeah. Yeah, we could remove my head from my shoulders I think yeah, like cuz he could be given his Mario Kart. It's tennis. There's Mario Party. Yeah. Yeah, so all these kind of things here where where where Bowser appears There's a good prime opportunity absolutely something in what about okay? This how about this is my strategy mark for mara cut mara cut

Occasionally has little shortcuts. Yeah, so I have like a I make a shortcut, okay? It's like maybe I've got like you know road like closed signs And then when one of you is like a bowser's coming I'm removed them so Bowser's like oh a shortcut He drives in eight foot well well I know he's ten foot 40 foot pit he into the pit and then we pour concrete on top of him butter being butter boom we entomb him yeah yeah while he's entombed yeah although I feel like that Bowser has been entombed before and then he just suddenly breaks out and is big now. Yeah, that is yeah, I can imagine that but I don't remember Where or why does Bowser appear in dr. Mario? No, no, unfortunately not

Why are you don't like and get him sick? No, I was gonna give him like, you know, like wrong medical Diagnosis malpractice. Yeah and cool. I'll cause him to spiral a bit. Yeah, like you have cancer Bowser. Bowser I'm so sorry well and then he because he thinks he's got a live you know yeah you just send him a letter Bowser as per your most recent medical visit you're dying and then he oh my god you know I think that then you're in his head what about if he has to go under the knife? Yeah, I think what if we could be like like a surgeon? Yeah, there's an idea Yeah, if he's good, what you get me in there if he's gonna go in for some routine whatever a routine surgery Yeah, and I slice his belly open and fucking around

It's even easier. Don't worry. Yeah, I'm a practicing Any theologist I think that's the way And then you just crank the gas crank the cranking the gas is a good way to get in the gas dude Paul is sure would say yeah Cranking the gas goes to a dentist and just like yeah, and he just starts giggling Bows has got to get dental surgery at some point. Yeah, those fireballs can't be great for exactly what do you just do you go? I'm just working your teeth whoop drop the scalpel in them You turn on the drill

Drill in your neck yeah Either turtle right yeah, I'm looking at common medical problems. Oh true of a but Traditional turtles hate fire yeah, he hates fire. That's true Yeah, no soup total okay common medical problems in total include metabolic bone disease vitamin a deficiency What does vitamin a do to the body yeah? respiratory infections shell rot and parasite infections Oh, we fill them with bugs and shell rot. Okay. Hmm Well, that would make him lighter as well if we can rot his shell. Yeah, how do you rot something?

Uh leave it out in the sun damp Okay, as a little funny prank. Fungal bacterial infection that can damage the shell and even become septic. Okay. Septic is good. Fungal, sepal, toads, toads, toads are fungus. Well here's another thing. Yes.

We can make an innocent Mario Kart prank. We just enter the Mario Kart. Now there's weapons and shit, but it all seems to be like fun and games. Like no one actually gets hurt from that. But with Bowser, we make a new item where it's a bucket of milk Oh, and we throw milk on him and then he keeps races in the Sun and we're just like, oh He gets sick. Yes, because we're doing a tournament. We're doing a new Mario Kart world Yeah brought to you by Nintendo

Knockout knockout tour which goes for ages. Yeah, the milk rots on Bowser. Yeah I get shells starts showing signs of shower. Oh, yeah I was thinking the same kind of concept but we do with Mario tennis Oh because tennis is like often in the heat that's true tennis players will be sweating Okay, and they're kind of getting dehydrated to engage Bowser Bowser jr. In a game of doubles. I kill him Bowser jr. No, yeah Bowser Jr. in a game of doubles. We're killing Bowser Jr. now too? Yeah. Gotta break a few omelets to make eggs or whatever. Gotta end the family line.

Evil dies tonight. I become Bowser's like ball boy assistant or whatever. Whenever he comes over to me for a drink of water, I hand him a water bottle full of milk. But he's gotta keep playing tennis, dude. He's drinking milk, it's hydrating him. Yeah, that doesn't yeah you faint we faint milk Oh, no, you gotta spill it Mario tennis arsenic water. Yeah, he drinks that he's getting tired up plus them in the town

Wow, well hang on hang on with tennis in tennis and wait we're playing against Bowser about and you're there water boy Yeah, well, what's wrong with that? Nothing. Perfect plan. In tennis, they often, in the stands, are eating cream and strawberries. Oh yes, yeah, yeah. Now that, if that was thrown onto a turtle shell, then that would, and then bake in the hot, hot sun, that wouldn't be good for a turtle shell.

But if there was a crowd riot where everyone threw yeah cream on just one guy Just one guy needs to do it that would that would end the game. What about okay? What about this? I once again you same plan, but I infiltrate Bowser's sort of like support team as his masseuse And instead of massaging him with oils. I massage him with butter This is actually pretty good. So when he stands out in the Sun, he says the crisp up. He's smelling good Hey, just want to have a quick look at Bowser's shell spiky. Yeah, I'm not doing a shell I'm doing in the joints and if you do it if you're being real careful, yeah Going up in the back for his body's all soft and disgusting. Yeah, you like don't worry

Mr. Bowser, this is like a turtle wax kind of thing. Yeah, yeah. Your shell's gonna make it real hard. Yeah, you gotta remember you gotta massage the shell because the shell rots. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's true. Not rubbing butter on his face. Yeah, rub butter all between them joints. In the joints. He's out in the sun.

Milk in there. You're smelling him crisp up. Because he can't, he can't look behind him. He doesn't know what you're doing there. He's face down in the hole. Exactly. In the hole. He'd be great.

You could do whatever you want. Dude, I could put anything up there behind the shell yeah, I could put anything fish old fish old fish Why are you putting it up there behind you to put it on me? the shell from the back One of the best ways to do it Yeah Yeah, I'm putting up like you know how do you get behind his shell because it's all like that next like his neck is attached Right no because he can go into his shell so his neck can't be it's no but a turtle can go into the shell and then

They're attached. Yeah, the next attached to the shell Yeah, I'm thinking about he's the turtles. I've famously almost got killed by Neck it's like a challenge. Yeah, the shells it's like it shall is there. Yeah, you know, the shells. It's like their bones on the outside, dude, like a crab. Mm hmm. I know crabs, too. You can probably get in there with like a like a syringe or something. Yeah, yeah. Oh, filled with butter. Yeah. I was thinking filled it with butter.

Mm hmm. Cooking like a delicious lobster. Yeah, because when he comes in, it's dehydrated and crispy from playing tennis. I say, oh, just come right this way to a spa bath full of onions and carrots and Stop making turtle soup. Yeah Just go to sleep Bowser Bowser, Jr. I just got a big spoon. I'm gonna stir you. Yeah, it's good for your joints It's good to be stood. Yeah first. Yeah, go put him in the steam room. Yeah, exactly

Really separate that shell from the Is turtle soup good, I mean, I know I know it's unethical yeah people love it dude do they yeah Why we don't have like any more thought like yeah Galapagos turtles they were so delicious we were eating turtles or tortoises what does Soup probably fucking awesome dude anything. We're not allowed to eat is probably good We're also sponsored by the FDA Soups probably delicious, okay, you shouldn't eat it, but it's probably awesome, you know But it's probably awesome, you know? Yeah, I don't know. I don't know.

It has a firm texture similar to rabbit, with a very distinct and slightly sweet flavor. It's great on it's own, tossed in flour and then either deep or pan fried but turtle meat really shines in almost any small game or fish recipe. Yeah, I can imagine, cause it's, I mean like, you know

it's eating a lot of, like, earthy grassy, like I think it would be delicious be delicious and fish and fish and shit. You hate seafood. Yeah, why was that appealing to you? Well, he sometimes eats like some fish. I like some fish Yeah, you ranked barramundi you like barramundi That's crazy to me you're so outspoken against seafood. I don't like mussels. And oysters. And oysters.

Any of the slimy foods are not for me. Prawns? Yuck. He doesn't like bugs. Crab? Yuck. Yuck. Yuck.

Disgusting to me. I don't mind crab, but to me it's just like, it's too much effort. Yeah. I understand why, if you order, say, crab. Yeah. Same thing with prawns. Why is it that, like, you know, it comes with like say the shell on mmm comes in the shell This should be and then and then they give you like little little

Things to break the shell they give you anything. It's not worth the effort. Correct. What if a Crab sushi or prawns What if there were other meats that came in shells like a chicken shell? Would chicken be worth? Chicken would be worth a shell. Well no, well the thing is usually you're paying a bit more. Chicken is good. But usually you're paying a bit more for crab or say prawns or whatever.

You're paying a lot more for turtle. Turtle sushi? Woo! But then like you know, it comes you got to do some of the work Yeah, it feels like it should be cheaper if I'm doing some of the work. I agree to keep it fresher, but I also Yeah, I mean whatever I dude. I'm jealous. I think it'd be fun. You know yeah working it out Well, yeah, open it you know chicken. I want a crab. I'll bring you along. I'll do the work Award I'll do the work. You'll eat the crab. You'll get the sweet reward. Chicken wings are a bit of work. Not really.

You know, like a crab it seems like you get Chicken wings you like break, cause if you're gonna eat all the meat off the wing you gotta break them and slurp them. Are you gonna do that crazy thing where they go, you know that one? Yeah, you just twist it and you pull them out real easy. Yeah, there's like crazy methods for getting all the meat off a chicken wing. You can just kinda do a twisty thing and you just kinda pull out the two bones. Or you hold it in one hand and slam it down or some shit I thought you're getting sauce all over your hands. Yeah

Because I'm imagining these wings are covered in blue cheese sauce. Yeah, these sloppy sloppy wings. Oh man We're doing that thing where we're recording close to lunchtime. We're thinking about eating turtle soup Big turtle soup my meal prep is a big turtle soup. Is it ethical to eat turtle soup if it's bowser? Well, probably there's some turtles we got too many of. I think snapping turtles? Yeah. I don't want to eat a snapping turtle.

That's the main turtle for soup? Is there turtles here a lot? They feel like they would taste bad. They're crazy, dude. They'll bite your fucking finger off for a snapping turtle. They're scary. Oh, probably there's some turtles you can have. I think if you look it up, there's some, I don't think it's unethical turtle soup on its own.

Yeah. You know. It'd be like if you're eating an endangered species. Yes. Probably Australia is one of the places where it's mostly okay to eat certain turtles. Really? Is it kind of like, you know know eating say chicken or bird. Mm-hmm is usually quite fine Yeah, but then if say you were to eat say Some sort of bald eagle. Yeah. Yeah, not fine people. That's a couple fights because that's endangered. Yeah. Yeah, they shouldn't do that

But chickens fine chickens fine. We have plenty of them You might as well eat them dude, and if I guess in Australia, we've got plenty of them. You might as well eat them, dude. And if, I guess in Australia, we've got enough turtles that it... No, okay, it's a different, it's a... The whole... The whole thing. So the six species of turtles found in Australian waters and all of them are protected.

Okay. But under the Native Title Act of 1993. Yeah, okay, it's like how some... Indigenous tradition... Like First Nations people in Canada can eat whale and whatever and it's chill. Yeah, okay. Alright, that's fine. Tie it.

Yeah, man. Turtle soup, god damn. You got me thinking about it, dude. I think when you said turtle coated in flour and fried, I don't know if you said fried. I did say fried. That sounds good. What was the, I guess, club, for lack of a better word, the gentlemen club? Yeah.

That, was it Darwin that was a part of, where he was like, I want to eat everything. Yeah, who was that? Some guy and he was like, every animal is delicious except for the mole, which is fucking horrible. He's like, would you have signed up for that? Yeah. Because I think that would be a great reason to just travel. Yes, absolutely.

Oh yeah, let me try eating. Mayhaps I will try rhinoceros for dinner it was yes the Glutton Club yeah that's fabulous that's awesome dude I'm going to different countries and eating fucking crazy shit a group of Cambridge students including Charles Darwin how much diarrhea you reckon they did. Whoa, so much. Like fucking, cause like we know how to cook cow and chicken and goose and duck or whatever, but if somebody gives you like fucking anaconda, oh no that's even that's we probably know how to cook, somebody gives you.

I think there's like a basic of like you know, as long as I've like chuck it on fire, it should be fine. Yeah. Except for when it's like, why is that crawling with parasites? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah, that's not like if you eat bear It can kill you isn't it if you eat certain parts of bear no I mean to bear just any bears there's a lot of parasites Yeah, real good chances full of a fucked up parasite that will basically eat you from the inside out. That's awesome Yeah, this whole purpose of the student society was to consume animal meat tried trust yet

So you know this part, but trust me Okay, goes good, okay Unknown to the human palate the club did not last long and ended abruptly After an unpleasant experience with a brown owl carcass what they ate an owl fucked up, and they were like fuck this Fuck this club. We gotta end the club. That's so funny. This brown owl was so bad, it ruined this club. Just sitting around the owl caucus and being like,

we gotta, we gotta be doing this. We fucked it. We fucked this one. This one's bad. This is wrecked. I'd never want to eat a fucked up animal again. Fuck, give me a chicken. Yeah.

Yuck. What happened? I don't imagine owl being particularly nice. Well that's because they probably eat lots of rats. Vermin, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yuck. And I don't imagine there being much meat on an owl, really. Like, they seem lean.

Yeah. As a creature. As a bird. I want to say their drumstick would be so little. Yeah. You ever see people sometimes get this algorithm on Instagram where they'll cook an entire ostrich in the desert? You don't see that shit, dude?

They cook up like a hundred potatoes and 400 onions and they put them in an ostrich. You don't see that shit dude. They cook up like a hundred potatoes and 400 onions and they put them in an ostrich. You getting this? That's just me? No dude, that's just you. I just get babes. I'm getting like, hey, we cooked a whole ostrich in the desert. You're not seeing this? On Instagram or TikTok? My TikTok algorithm's a bit different. I think on both. On both I'm getting my Instagram Even though I don't engage with any material on Instagram. It's like you want to see fat ass. Oh, dude Yeah, mine's all fat asses. My it's

Thrift in content ostriches cooked in the desert fat. Oh, yeah, dude So yeah, the Glutton Club met weekly was a roaring success Yeah, they ate many beautiful birds such as the hawk and the club came from a broth end when a tawny hour served up The meat was disgusting and stringy and was described as indescribable Like like enough that it was like we have to end the club not like oh that was a bad meal Yeah, I hope fucking earthworms or whatever we eat next tastes better. They're like that.

We're calling it. Like cowards, like you're like, oh, we're eating a hawk. We're eating, you know, all these, we ate badger. We're eating fancy different animals. And then you're like, oh, one bad experience. And then something like boo hoo, we're canceling the club. But maybe we- They might've made them really sick.

Like maybe we can't comprehend how bad it was To be honest, I have not eaten. Yeah brown tawny owl. He ate an armadillo and said it looks and tastes like duck What the fuck? Armadillo's are hairy and that fucks me up. They feel like they should have like a horrible smell. Yeah, I think they do I think they do. I think they stink like shit. Well, yeah most fucking no, but I think Look at an armadillo and tell me that one don't stink bad. Yeah. Better or worse than rats?

Worse, worse, worse. Rats are little, right? So there's only too much surface area for that stank. Armadillo looks too big. Rats can get big. And I imagine an armadillo dude like opening out and revealing his hairy underside and the stench swathing out. That's disgusting. You know what armadillo do? Like opening out and revealing it's hairy undecided and the stench wafting out? That's disgusting.

Crevices and stuff like that. Which is kinda like Bowser. Hey that's true, Bowser's got a lot of crevices. Bowser would stink. Mario probably stinks too. He's always going into toilet pipes. Who do you reckon smells the best in the Mushroom Kingdom? Tide. Daisy. Bitter. What's wrong with you? I think she'd smell lovely. Pipes who do you reckon smells the best in the mushroom kingdom? Todd Daisy Buddha?

I think she'd smell lovely Because bird I like takes care of herself, that's what I'm thinking she'd have like some Strange waft because you can't have a opening of the of the body that big yeah, that is true That you would would smell like organ. Wow. Whatever that is. You walk past it and go, did you just catch a strange bond?

And you go, yeah, I think that's organ. It would be like, yeah, kind of like if, like if someone just had a very clean, but gaping asshole. Yeah. It would have a sense. Yeah, yeah. If you smell like the inside of Whatever the inside of a person smells like that's what Buddha would smell like Yeah, maybe like a surgeon on course, but what is the inside of a person? Yeah, please tell us what is what am I good?

It's good. Like is it bad meat? You fuck wit is what the doctor would say and then when he don't call me a fuck with doctor What kind of man side manner is it? Smell like me We can probably look it up on our little machines. It's gonna smell like iron which is more like meat Yeah, if you've got an open hole What does the inside of a person smell like? Like toad, in my head I was like toad kind of like would smell like nothing, but I guess they are fungus.

They would smell like fungus. Although a toad that is a hat maybe. Yeah, but I think that's only for the cartoon. Creature. Yeah. What's the most hairless like? Naked mole rat? No, I say Mario character. Yeah, most naked

Yeah, they would have they say smell like like a reptile yeah sweet tangy metallic yeah meat yeah Why I don't know why you were so against it being the human body is me. I know that I'm just I don't know I just like I go past the butcher and I thought it'd be different. There's definitely a unique smell to the innards that's hard to describe. Mmm, indescribable, like the tawny outage. Yeah, dude. Interesting. Interesting.

Um, what, okay, what if we, what if, how are we gonna kill Bowser? Let's figure it out. I think, like, you might be, sir, the... Well, how do you kill kings of old? Yeah poison, poison, assassin, betray them, poisoned jester, yeah stab them, stab them through a curtain. Yeah yeah yeah, are you in the curtain or are they in the curtain? I'm in the curtain. Is Bowser love, what does he love like, you know, because if he was a part of like his garden club, could you like you know feed him way too much food? What does Bowser eat? Yeah good question love? Like, you know, because if he was a part of like his, you know, Gruntin Club, could you like, you know, feed him way too much food? What does Bowser eat? Yeah, good question.

I don't think you really see, like Bowser isn't like a big feast guy, I think. I like, I think the king's in the curtain, but I love you in the curtain trying to stab out as you come upon. Why is the king in the curtain? I think it's he's hiding and listening in or some shit. Is it? Oh, no, the king gets poisoned through his ear. The king in the curtain I think it's he's hiding and listening in or some shit is it oh No, the king the king gets poisoned through his ear. Yeah, uncle that's killed in the curtain Yeah, yeah, well we could poison basil through zeal. Yeah when he's sleeping

Yeah, there's a reddit post from 11 years ago. How did most medieval kings die gout some people saying? post Most medieval kings died of old age age illness or some other natural causes okay if they died no shit nefarious usually stands out in historical records what about have you ever seen that video of someone they got a tortoise and they think it's a turtle and they drop it in a lake and people like wait no no no no because like it's just going to sink to the bottom yeah And people like wait no no no no cuz like it's just gonna sink to the bottom. Yeah Drop him in the lake. Yeah, like he could he swim

We say Bowser I'm your canoeing instructor come out with me on Lake Havasak and don't worry. I've reinforced the canoe. Yeah Three were killed in battle no more wounds sustained in battle one king died in a brawl that he probably started Shout out to Edmund one that's all three were definitely murdered and two were probably murdered and two were beheaded okay so could we cause an uprising well in Paper Mario thousand year door there is a noose in the town square for some reason Bowser hanged by the neck till dead so heavy he would break the gallows. But okay well then oh. We're gonna need a stronger rope and stronger wood. Yeah. Or do what we did with that elephant and electrocute him. Oh! Oh the stampy method. Stampy? No that's the elephant. They electrocuted Bart's elephant. Topsy. Topsy yeah yeah yeah.

We say Bowser just come here for a speech and then we electrocute the ground that he's on. Yeah, and we know he's not immune to electrocution. Yeah. Because we see that in the games. I think there's a risk that Bowser becomes like, that this makes him more powerful. He got electric Bowser. Yeah. Yeah, then he's gonna shoot us with lightning bolts. What about if we go back to the- He breathes electricity. We go back to the drowning method

Let me give you my plan. I say Bowser welcome to my camp camp Jackson He comes it was Bowser jr. I take them out on a canoe. Mm-hmm. Well, we're out in the middle of the lake Mm-hmm. I pull out a gun and I just shoot the bottom of the canoe Mm-hmm, and then we just sink into the lake. I died too and that's okay You can swim No, I Sink like a stone like I'm too heavy and then we hit the bottom of the bowser can't swim He doesn't have the legs for it. He's got stumpy little legs. He's not gonna be able to get out of there Okay, okay, he drives Mario games bowser can swim

So you drown they're fine. I do like the idea of doing like, you know, it's like a father-son sort of like bonding experience and that's how you get them both. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What is a way to kill someone? Well, with kings, often they'll have a taster. Oh yeah. You know?

So what can say, and who is his taster? Because what is that taster maybe? Probably right so he's a what is he he's like a Cooper like a wizard Cooper So what is a wizard immune to that will kill a regular turtle man? What is a wizard? What can't you feed a turtle magic soup? Probably just tons you can't feed a turtle ah plastic plastic oh my god the answer was right in front of us we finish a six-pack yeah we go toss the ring we kill whammy and Bowser Bowser Bowser Jr. Bowser, some of his children trapped in the ring, trapped in the house

and if that doesn't work we feed him a straw fuck dude killing turtles is as easy as hell Bowser look, it's a jelly fish I say shaking a plastic bag oh it's tangled up in his guts we did a good job

Mario comes in mama mia Oh, it's tangled up in his guts. We did a good job. Yeah. Mario comes in, mama mia. Oh my god. And I say, I shake Mario's hand and I say, don't worry, we did it. We took care of it. And then I reach out my other hand and say, five bucks. Pay up, Mario, you bitch. Oh Mario, we did you a favor. Yeah, exactly. Killing turtles is easy, Mario.

Killing turtles is our life. Wasn't even that hard. Give us five bucks. Yeah. That's, yeah, we did it in one one dude. I forgot how easy it is to kill a turtle Well on that note I've been Joel. I've been Jackson. And I've also been Joel and thank you very much Thumb Crams for joining Thank you so much for having us. Check us out new episodes every Friday You can follow us on Instagram at Thumb Crams pod. Yeah, and yeah video games. Yeah, dude Yeah, thank you so much plumbing the desk stuff for having us

Goodbye so long you