Plumbing the Death Star - In What Context, If Any, Would You Eat Green Eggs and Ham?

Episode Date: August 12, 2018

In which our heroes ask the hard hitting question; In What Context, If Any, Would You Eat Green Eggs and Ham?Join our brand new facebook group here; https://www.facebook.com/groups/535280830149669/Check out our upcoming lives shows right here; http://www.sanspantsradio.com/live/Theme music by the wonderfully talented Benny Davis! You can find all his stuff at his website bennydavismusic.com or check out his YouTube youtube.com/bennythejukeboxWant to help support the show?Sanspants+: sanspantsplus.comPatreon: patreon.com/sanspantsradioPodkeep: sanspantsradio.podkeep.comUSB Tapes: audiobooksontape.comMerch: teepublic.com/stores/sanspantsradioWant to get in contact with us?Email: [e-mail]: twitter.com/sanspantsradioWebsite: sanspantsradio.comFacebook: facebook.com/SansPantsRadioReddit: reddit.com/r/sanspantsradioOr individually at;Jackson: twitter.com/AlldogsaredeadDuscher: twitter.com/dusch13Zammit: twitter.com/GoddammitZammit Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sands Pants Radio. This is unpleasant. Hey everyone, quick update for our Plumbing the Death Star Get Posh UK tour. About half the shows are now sold out, or very close to, so if you don't want to miss out, make sure you head to sandspantsradio.com slash live for links on where to grab your tickets today. There's still a few spots left for our London Podcast Festival show, as well as back-to-back late-night shows at the Soho. So, once again, head to sanspantsradio.com and grab your tickets today.

Every show is a completely different topic, and remember to head to our Twitter or Facebook for any and all updates. Just search for Sans Pants Radio. Also, if you have any coffee, breakfast, brunch, or just general food recommendations, please email them in, zanspantsradio at gmail.com, or reach out to me directly on Twitter, at GoddammitZammit. Hey everyone, and welcome to this week's episode of Plumbing the Death Star, where we ask the important questions like, in what context, if any, would you eat green eggs and ham? So I have the lyrics to the Dr.

Zeus classic green eggs and ham. And it was very funny. I'm like, how will I find out? I'm like, I can't get the book. Seuss classic Green Eggs and Ham. And it was very funny. I'm like, how will I find out? I'm like, I can't get the book. You look at lyrics, it's on genius.com. That's great. I think. So first off, what are Green Eggs and Ham?

Is this just eggs with pesto? No, it's green eggs and green ham. Yeah. So there's no toppings. It's just, imagine eggs. Green. Ham. The yolk's green, isn't it just, imagine eggs. Green. Ham. The yolk's green, isn't it? Green.

The whole thing is green. I'll see if I can get a picture for everyone. I thought just the yolks were green. I don't know if that's the case. But I am not remembering well from my primary schools. Green. Sam I am is the bloke trying to give it to us, yes? Yeah.

And we're like, Sam I am, I will not eat green eggs and ham. I will not eat them, Sam I am, I will not eat green eggs and ham. I will not eat them, Sam, I will not eat green eggs and ham. I won't eat them on a plane or a boat or a train. We got a lot of places to get through. I made those ones up. They were fake. Oh, yeah. So the egg white is still egg white.

The ham is a vibrant green. And the yolk is also a similar vibrant. Well, evidently that's not the ham as we know it. That's from either some other kind of beast or some irradiated pig. Some other creature's ham. It's that ham as given to us by Sam I Am that I will not eat them, Sam I Am. What is ham? Ham is, what do you mean what is ham?

It's pig. I know it's pig, but what part of the pig? The, the, the. Do you know? Yeah, giving me grief. You can't even fucking answer. I reckon it's the thigh. That's a ham, yeah?

I'm going to look it up. I now know what ham is. It's the arse, isn't it? The back legs? You were both very correct. Yes. The back of the thigh or the thighs and buttocks. Okay.

Salted or smoked meat from the up part of a pig's leg. The salted arse. The ham. Would you like some salted ass? Excuse me. Oh, sorry. Ham, I meant. You love ham.

Your name on everything is hams. That's true. I am hams forever. In the late 15th century, the term came to denote the back of the thigh, hence the thigh or hock, of an animal. Okay. It's not just a piggy wing. So you can get chicken ham if you wanted to.

I imagine. If you were so inclined. You would just call that a chicken drumstick Or another definition An excessively theatrical actor Ham actors Will you eat green eggs and ham Will you eat green eggs and John Ham So I suspect green eggs and ham

Surely that's an SNL sketch at some point John Ham the ham actor That seems like Just the kind of thing SNL would absolutely do. If they haven't, Tina Fey, you've got my number. Yeah, just from us to you. Please enjoy. So I suspect green eggs and ham is rotten eggs and ham.

That's the only way I can think that you can get eggs and ham and make them green. I guess you could put food dye in them. You live in Dr. Seuss. Yeah. in them. You live in Dr. Seuss. Yeah. Do you know you live in Dr. Seuss in this situation? I don't know if we do. I don't know if we are Dr. Seuss preachers. Because, again, if it's, like, rotten, the scent would be, like, gross.

No. Yeah. But imagine, look, green eggs, I'm like, pesto? Yeah. But that's if it was, like, a scrambly eggs and they were all kind of all pesto on top of that, like a nice, delicious green pesto. But that's if it was like a scrambly eggs and they were all kind of all pesto on top of that, like a nice delicious green pesto. But it's not.

The yolks are a vibrant, irradiated grain. So just before we dive into it, are we willing to eat green eggs and ham now as it stands? No. I just feel like something about them is off Even if they tasted like regular Green eggs and ham Something about the fact that they're green And the fact that in the back of my head I'm like this is rotten meat

Sam I am I will not eat your rotten meat No because rotten meat doesn't go green And also like This is de-mediated Can I give it a sniff first question. Can I give it a sniff first? Yes. Because if I give it a sniff and I'm like, nah, smells good. Yeah.

I'm probably going to be inclined to eat it just straight off the bat. Look, I don't know. I'm brave. The color is. Isn't that weird? Remember, Jack, you showed me that guy who made the chicken wings gold. Yeah, that's true. And that was revolting.

Yeah. So imagine it's the same thing. Someone has gotten a green food paste. Maybe it's made of animals. Because again, all I'm thinking is pesto, but that is not pesto. It's not pesto. It's not a nice looking green.

No, no, no, no. It's a radiated green. Well, let me read the lyrics and see if we can understand, if we can get a little, glean at least what green eggs and ham are. I am Sam, I am Sam, Sam I am. That Sam I am, that Sam I am. I do not like that Sam I am. Do you like green eggs and ham?

I do not like them, Sam I am. Okay, so we never actually find out what green eggs and ham are. Okay, so where does green happen in nature in an animal? Because I'm like, what is green that we eat? Oh yeah, vegetables. Nothing has- What is green? No meat is green. That's just life. No meat- What about those that we eat? Oh, yeah, vegetables. Nothing has... What is green? No meat is green.

That's just life. No meat... What about those Chernobyl pigs? Oh, maybe. I mean, it's still going to be meat. I don't know if it'll be green-coloured. Unless it is currently coated in toxic waste. Then, I guess, potentially.

Not a dumb question maybe is toxic waste actually green or am i just remembering captain planet i don't know well radiation for some reason in every fictional thing is just glows green yes why i don't know i'm not let me look it up hulk yes h Hulk is a good answer Um Toxic waste The Carbon rod In the nuclear power plant

In the Simpsons Mm Ooze The ooze Flubber Flubber The ood Yeah

The ood Uh Okay hang on Um The most likely source Was the development In 1908 Of a paint containing

Zinc sulphide Doped with a small amount of copper. The mixture grew bright green when it was exposed to radioactivity, and adding a small amount of radium to the cheap paint was a way of making it last longer. So, irradiation not necessarily green can be green. So that's just a socially context that we've sort of- You know what is green and does happen to meet? Mold. Yeah. But not that green. Well happen to meet? Mould. Yeah.

But not that green. Well, you don't know over moulds. And not that uniform. Yeah. Unless it is... Because mould grows. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mould ain't uniform. Mould, but mould could grow across a whole ham. Yes, it could, but there's gonna be edges where...

You're making me look up mouldy ham. I'm just letting you know. Quickly Google mouldy ham. There's gonna be green, there's gonna be black bits. there's going to be edges where... You're making me look up moldy ham. Quickly giggle a moldy ham. There's going to be green, there's going to be black bits. There's not going to be one uniform color of mold. That's not how mold works. Moldy hams. Show us your best moldy ham.

There it is. That's a moldy ham. That's green. That's pretty green. That's hitting my... Yeah, but that's artistic license. That was used by Dr. Seuss. Entirely covered in mulled ham.

Surely at this point, I'll find a completely green ham. Right? Well, look, I can't. But we know that a vegetable- Wait. Yeah? So. Yeah, I'm listening. Just hear me out here. Yeah, I can't, but we know that a vegetable- Wait. Yeah? So. Yeah, I'm listening.

Just hear me out here. Yeah, I'm all ears. Now, say this was like, say what, maybe five, ten years ago. Mm-hmm. You got your first smartphone. Oh, okay. Maybe like, maybe your second smartphone. Yeah.

And you're like, I'm bored. I want to quickly download an app. Sure. Maybe an app that like, you know, I can use some parabolas to kind of like maybe slingshot some things into other things. Okay. So I'm going to, oh, this new thing that's come out. It seems to be very popular. It's taken the whole world by storm.

Oh, what's this? There's some birds. Uh-huh. And they're not very happy. In fact, they're kind of angry. You could call them grumpy. Now, what color are those hams? That's true.

They're green. They are green. And that's true, they're green. They are green. And that's skin, too. Mm-hmm. So, you're saying that we are eating the angry bird's pigs? Yes, that's what I'm pointing forward. Those pigs, I mean, I guess they don't look unappetising.

But they are intelligent enough to form a military. Yeah, that's true. That's pretty intense. I don't think... Do we see them with legs or are they just flirting heads? Yeah, that's true. Because if we don't see them with legs... We're eating their ass! We're eating pig ass!

It doesn't... Like, looking at the meat, it doesn't look like any bit of a pig. That's... Look. That's a pig. That's, look. That's arse. That's arse. That's one arse. One half arse.

That's at least an Angry Bird pig cheek. Google it. Google it. Be like. Google one half arse. One half pig arse. Yeah. What am I going to get?

We're eating some Angry Bird pig cheeks. I'm playing with something loud. I've turned into Jackson. There's a pig's behind for everyone. Everyone get a good hock at that. That's good. Yeah, I reckon that's what we're doing. We're eating some angry big pig noose. Angry big pig noose.

Zamet's eating angry big pig noose. Douche is giving it a sniff before deciding what to eat. Oh, I'm not eating it. I'm just saying that's what we're eating. Oh, okay. I'm not eating. We've got to solidify first what green eggs and ham is

before we see if Sam-I-Am will convince us to eat green eggs and ham. So we've gone to the Angry Birds universe, and we've just cold-clocked some angry pigs. Yep. And then we're eating their ass. Angry pigs or hungry pigs? What are they? The pigs are...

Sad bloke pigs. Their emotions are not taken into contact. But they are intelligent enough to speak, form military buildings. Shit ones. Shit ones the birds can break. But nevertheless, that's cleverer than a regular pig. And look, I can't do what they did. Yeah, nor can I.

Those pigs can build a far better structure than I can. Than I'll ever be able to. All right. But would you eat them now? No. Okay. As in, like, knowing that it's... Would you eat them here and there?

Would you eat them anywhere? Honestly, it depends on the smell. I have little to no regard for my own health or well-being. So if someone was like, eat this, it's good. My brain would be like, it's not good. Yeah, your brain. See, that's why I keep thinking it's moldy. Because that's what my brain would be telling me.

This is off arse you're eating. I'm eating rotten arse is what my mind would be saying. I don't want to eat rotten arse. Because I imagine it could be kind of a little bit sloppy but let's get the first context for this rotten clever pig arse would you eat it in a boat? does that change?

now it's sloppy wet arse no this is salted and ham tastes better salted and you probably put salt on eggs so what type of boat? There's no context. I'm assuming it's a houseboat. I don't think it's a speedboat.

Nothing more classy than eating ham in a speedboat. Like a kayak. Yeah. Because if it's something where the air is salty and you're traveling enough around that it's salting your food. Yeah. Preservatives in salt. That's true.

So you're saying that would counteract the rotten arse. Imagine right now you are in a speedboat. So have we decided it's rotten arse or is it still up to my interpretation? I'm putting forward that it is angry bird pig meat. I'm saying rotten arse. You gotta choose. You either got

intelligent pigs or rotten arse. If it's intelligent pigs, and I know it's intelligent pigs and therefore it's just like a different flavor of ham. Yeah. Fuck yeah, I'm eating it. Then I'll eat it here and there, then I'll eat it anywhere. Fuck literally anywhere. Yeah, but for there to be a question of whether

I eat it in these contexts as given by Sam I am, then I think I have to assume it's rotten arse meat. No, there's no... That is not true. He's trying to give it to you. He's not being like, I'm trying to poison you.

Well, maybe he thinks rotten ass meat's delicious. Maybe he thinks that angry pig bird meat is good. But I'll eat pig bird meat here and there and anywhere. I won't eat rotten ass here and there and anywhere. Otherwise, why even half the episode? Will I eat it with a fox? Why not? It's just meat. Alright, so how about this?

We combine them. So it's pig meat from the Angry Birds, but it's a little mouldy. It's still edible. A little mouldy. I don't want to spoil the end of this episode or the end of Great Eggs and Ham, so if you're worried about spoilers, just tune out for the next 15 seconds. He does eat and it's good at the end though yeah well he quite likes

them uh look here we go um you do not like them so you say try them try them and you may try them try them you may i say sam if you will let me be i will try them you will see oh i like green eggs and ham uh and thank you so much everyone who's joined back in after skipping our spoiler warning yep yep good so uh yeah things so they're tasty so i don't think they're rotten oh yeah so they're tasty i don't think they're rotten either well all we know is that this fella likes them doesn't mean they're not rotten maybe he loves the taste of rotten ass what about if if it's just It could be some kind of like a culture Like you know like a blue cheese Or glazing on the ham

Okay so like a green glaze Yeah green glaze Like oh what if it's like vibrant Because I think green I think apples Yeah okay Like a nice apple glaze But it shouldn't turn a green Unless you use a lot of

I guess I've used a great deal of apples and limes And other green fruits To make a glaze for the ham. What if it's like jellied ham? Yeah. That was a thing in the 70s. Yeah, put everything in a jello. Okay, so I guess it could be some kind of terrible mixture of jelly and meat, as well as some eggs. They look kind of like deviled eggs, so maybe they're like deviled eggs with some food dye or something.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So, okay. We know what the... Now, we've kind of got an idea what the ham is. What are those eggs, though?

Is it potentially from the same animal? Well, that's a terrible thought. To be honest, they don't really look like eggs. They look more like... I mean, they do look like eggs, but... Yes, Jackson? What do they look like? I don't know. Do you need to make a call, man? I can't see the picture. It's up to you. What do they look like, Jack?

Help me here. I'm drowning. They actually look like eggs, but, like, not cracked eggs. Like, look. Here you go. Here's the picture. What? Ah! No, the yolk looks like it's an uncracked egg. Yeah. It's sunny side up. Yeah, I guess.

Which means they're cooked. Safe to eat. Man, the main character of Sam of Green Eggs and Ham is thick. I'll tell you what. Look at that fucking arse. That's crazy. That's Sam I Am, isn't it? No, that's not Sam I Am.

That's the fella who's interested in the green eggs and ham. And Sam I Am's the one trying to get him to eat them. Sam I Am looks like a little fucking weasel, dude. But yeah, that's just sunny side up, mate. Well, there you go. All right. Sunny side up eggs. If they weren't cooked, the yolk, no, the white would be running off everywhere.

That's just sunny side up. No, no. I just imagined that the eggs were like in shell and green and lying in a bed of, I don't know what, a little pikelet or something. But yeah, sure. Oh oh you're an idiot yeah well no i i've i realized what they were saying i was just like they don't look quite right 230 episodes interpommended death star and jackson's still a dumb fuck fucking 800 million episodes in there won't have changed i'm not gonna suddenly get smart I'm not going to suddenly get smart, Tushant. That's not how it works. Get smart!

That helps us not in this situation. The funny thing about get smart is, Jack, is that Maxwell Smart, despite his last name being Smart, is actually quite dumb. He's not terribly He always solves the case, though. Solves the case but he's a buffoon, Jack. Would he solve it without the help of

Agent 99? Yeah, probably not. He's got a shoe phone. That's pretty cool. But he jams his nose in a door. Yeah, well, you know, swings and roundabouts. Swings and roundabouts. Maxwell's smart. Actually dumb.

Maxwell's dumb. But Maxwell's dumb would actually be smart, Jack. That never happens in like a sitcom where a character's name is like positive. Maxwell's dumb. We call him that because he's a genius. What? All right, so those eggs. Yeah. So we're going to be like, all right, they haven't been dyed.

Yeah. There's no pesto involved. They're just naturally occurring green eggs, which to me says rotten. Yeah. But you'd be able to smell rotten eggs fairly from a distance. Oh, farts. Because again, if this thick boy who's given them a sniff from the cover,

which he clearly is, if they were rotten, he would not be that close. Yeah, well, he might because Sam, I am not leaving him alone. I actually have some green eggs and ham as made by someone. Recipes, yes. You ready? Because it's fucking bad. All right. Oh, my God.

That's just dyed scrambled eggs. Yeah. What's the ham? I don't know. Well, let's for context say that's what's on offer for you. No. Because that's the worst possible version of green eggs and ham. I'd rather eat the rotten one.

All right. So, so just to describe to our listeners, it looks like a is it a blue, a green burger? Like they've dyed a whole burger or sandwich? I think it is slices of ham. Okay, so thick, very thick slices of ham that are dyed like almost the colour of broccoli?

The website is eclectichomeschool.com Hell yeah! So eclectich-homeschool.com slash green-ichomeschool.com. Hell yeah. So, eclectich-homeschool.com slash green hyphen eggs hyphen and hyphen ham hyphen four hyphen real. Give them a like so that they get a boost in popularity to our podcast. And then maybe they'll like us back. That's how this whole thing works. That's how people actually make money off YouTube. Yeah, absolutely. We get liked by eclectich homeschooling.com okay so if that's the green eggs and ham oh

yes how did you make the ham all green i melted some butter and mix it with green food coloring i then dip the ham in there and use the butter for frying. Yuck. I am not a boy that's into that much butter. So, that that's a big picture of the picture. Just zoom in, mate. Just look at it.

That is something that I'm going to regret tasting, but will still absolutely taste. Would you eat it on a boat? Honestly? I feel like no, because I feel like I'm already seasick. Then I put that buttery ham in my mouth and throw up. It's a speedboat. There's a lot of spray going there.

It's a little bit shaky. You're in your life jacket, kind of wobbling it. The ham is not hot. You just can't keep it hot. It's cold at sea. Question. Would you eat a ham sandwich on a speedboat? I'd eat a ham sandwich. With spray just going everywhere, getting a little bit wet and salty. Well, I'd duck down into the console and eat it there.

I've eaten on a boat before. It's good. No, I mean like a very small speedboat. I've eaten on a dinghy before. That's small. That's kind of close. But slow. Yeah.

No, I want small and fast. Well, I wouldn't. If somebody got my ham sandwich and dipped it in the sea, I wouldn't eat it then. I wouldn't be like, hmm, sea sandwich. There is a 60% chance that it will get sprayed by a lot of water. Like, there's a wave coming. There's a 60% chance that your ham sandwich is going to get dunked by our sea. Oh, wait.

I just remembered where... I've eaten a sandwich in the sea before when I've been in the sea. I was a child that I took my sandwich into the ocean for some reason I ate it, it was fine Did it get wet? Probably a bit I didn't drop it in the sea

I'm just kind of imagining you dragging it with your hand and not caring, just walking into the ocean Joe LaDouche at age 16 has no regard for his sandwich I wasn't 16, I was probably a bit younger But yeah A bit of salt spray, it's good Yeah, so you'd eat it on a boat? No, and the reason why I wouldn't eat. I was probably a bit younger. But yeah, a bit of salt spray. It's good. Yeah, so you'd eat it on a boat?

No. And the reason why I wouldn't eat this on the boat is because the moment that that ham got wet, that colour is running. Yeah. All down your hands. Oh, and a bit of pink shining through. That makes me genuinely nauseous. When you bite into that ham,

the inside's going to be a little pink. Yeah. And I just imagine the food dye, as it mixes with your saliva dripping down your chin. What? Jack, out of the three of us in the room, the only person who has any of their saliva drip down their chin when they eat is you. I just imagine it's- That's because you eat like a combination of

a bird and a pig? I think it's like a bird and a horse. Actually, it's more like a duck and a cow. Look, we know it is a... He doesn't chew, but then he sometimes, like, chews loudly. We know it's a combination of a bird and a beast of burden. We know that that's what's going on here.

Imagine just someone trying to swallow, but also chew their cud. Trying to swallow as they chew. So they're working against their teeth. You're the world's most unpleasant eater, and I don't know why you do this to us. I was trained wrong. So we're working against their teeth. You're the world's most unpleasant eater and I don't know why you do this to us. I was trained wrong. So on a boat? No. No. Not at all. Okay, so on a boat, the answer

is no. Yeah, no. What about with a goat? With a goat. Am I sharing the sandwich with a goat? I think the goat's just there. I don't know if you're sharing it. No, eating a sandwich with a goat implies you're sharing the sandwich with a goat. I think. I just don't like the idea of a goat eating eggs.

Yeah, that's wrong. And also the idea of a goat eating ham. But for some reason, eggs is worse. I get it. I'm imagining that goats are like now like a weasel going into like a hen house and just like trying to steal the delicious eggs. Imagine seeing a goat eat eggs out of a chicken's, like where it's laid them in the hatch. That's hideous. Straight from the cloaca.

Imagine a goat sucking an egg out. Delish. Telling someone to go suck an egg is unpleasant. Oh, it really is. So I was imagining like sucking an egg as you get an egg, you suck the egg. But now I'm imagining it sucking it straight from the chicken's cloaca. And that's a lot more unpleasant.

That's hideous. It's also funny to... Look, hey, if you're sick of telling people to go fuck themselves, and, like, you're trying out go suck an egg, try this on for size. Go rim a chicken. Oh, rim a chook. Fuck you.

Oh, go rim a chook. I think what's great is that I don't like the goat eating a ham or an egg because I feel like it's broken some farmyard bond. I'm like, you're part of the same society. That's like if I went and ate a baby. That's wrong. You're all together in this on the farm. You can't break that covenant by eating ham. What if the goat ate the

farmer? That's fine. The farmer keeps them jailed, so I get it. That's just revenge. What if it's just the goat eating the farmer's pants? Yeah, that's just funny. That's just good comedy. I also, just the idea of sharing a slice of ham with a goat is fairly disgusting.

Especially this grey one. Goats have bad breath. I imagine the goat's weird goat teeth driving their way through the ham. Also, I feel like the goat's not going to want to share. I feel like that goat's going to try and get more than half of that sandwich. You're getting kicked. Yeah. Absolutely. The goat is kicking you in the

face. Or butting me. Maybe it's good to eat green eggs and ham with a goat because the goat will eat the green eggs and ham. You don't have to have it. But that's not you eating the green eggs and ham with the goat. That's you watching a goat eat green eggs and ham. How little green eggs and ham do I have to eat? You have to eat half. Yeah, it's got to be 50-50 with the goat.

And I feel with that goat, you're not getting half. Yeah, that's true. It's a moot point at the end of the day. What if we up the goat's intelligence? What if it eats it with a knife and a fork? Is that better or worse for you? Where's it holding? It's got hooves. In his hooves. It's worse for me

because I'm like, what happened to this goat? What if I give the goat hands? I'm like, this green-necked ham, who cares? Who's this opposable goat? That's the worry. Oi! Opposable goat! Go rumour chalk! I bet there's still a goat with those human hands

in it. Pads away. Gives you the finger. What is happening to my life? I hate this farm. Yeah, no, I'm not going to share it with a goat either. That's two no's. Also, goats smell.

Like a goat, a male goat, they stink and they love pissing on themselves. That's like my kind of weekend. Okay. Will you eat them in the rain? Definitely not. That's worse than being in the ocean. No. Boo. Pass. In the ocean, I'm like, there's a chance it'll get sea spray.

But in the rain, it's gonna get wet. Alright, so I'm gonna rank these so far. Least likely to most likely. The rain, the boat, a goat. Yeah. Basically, yeah. Because you're at a cafe, right? There's no cover. You're sitting outside. You're having a delicious meal.

Any meal it may be, just so long as the plate you're in has a little bit of a dip. Then it just suddenly starts raining. Yeah, you're not eating now. Yeah. Although, there's like a very, very, very, like a very famous case suddenly starts raining. Yeah, you're not eating now. Yeah. Although. There's like a very, very, very, like a very famous case explores this. The song who left the cake out in the rain.

Who? What? Oh. I don't know this song. Sing a bit. I don't know how to sing it. It's just, it's in Priscilla. All right.

It's just like, oh, it's sad sad there's a cake in the rain It's basically the point of it Because you can't eat it because it's wet It is sad What food could you eat in the rain? Soup because then you're just drinking water Oh soup it's Constantly refilling

Free refills Yeah well the water displaces the soup Well I mean like anything with a lid I mean like What would be the worst? I reckon spag bol Well, I mean, like, anything with a lid. I mean, like... What would be the worst? I reckon spag bol. Oh, yeah, there's something disgusting about wet spaghetti.

Or any dessert, like cake, like a sponge. No, thank you. Gelati, though, I'm like... Gelati's sort of fine. Ice cream would be fine. It's just like extra tongues, you know? I hate it again. The rain's just extra tongues.

It's like God having a lick of ice cream Oi God stop tonguing my cream get out of my fucking my cream God

with your many little tongues um best food to eat in the rain worst food to eat in the rain worst food

I always think eating a pie in the rain is funny where you bite into the pie the rain gets in and displaces the meat

and you've just got a water pie left. That's unworthy. A soggy pie, as it were. Yeah. No, because there's something kind of wholesome about eating a pie in the rain. You're watching the footy. Fish and chips in the rain.

It's good, you know. It's too soggy. Well, it's all going to get soggy. You're in the rain. Yeah, that's true. You know. It's not bad. I reckon, yeah, spag bol, a roast.

Oh, yeah. There's a scene in the movie Gummo where a gross kid is sitting in a dirty bath, and he's eating a chocolate bar, and he drops the chocolate bar in the bath, and he picks it up and keeps eating it. And it's just so wildly unpleasant, and this is just reminding me of it. He also eats pasta in the same bath. He doesn't drop any, though, but though but he gets like sauce all over him. And he's drinking a milkshake out of a

very dirty glass. Wet food in the bath is hideous. Or just food in the bath. Any cafe like breakfast meal that has an egg, I think if you're eating in the rain, is probably the worst for me. Like an eggs benedict in the rain? Bad. Displace the hollandaise. Yeah.

There's a lot of displacing going on also in this rain situation we're imagining like a fucking yes i am like it's a storm basically but you're hungry yeah but you are hungry so you know what a really bad food to be eating in the rain yeah popcorn oh have you ever had soggy popcorn yeah or have you ever seen Like what wet Because it all It shrinks It all sticks together And it stinks Really?

What does it smell like? It's like Like bad popcorn? It kind of It smells like burnt popcorn But also like A different smell That I can't describe to you

Because like when we have to Clean popcorn machines The popcorn gets wet So It's bad We don't sell the wet popcorn What about jelly in the rain? No that's good

It bounces off Yeah I don't think that's true Apple in the rain Would sell the jelly in the rain no that's good it bounces off yeah i don't think that's true apple in the rain would be all right apple in the rain fruit in the rain is pretty good nah but not like a nene in the rain no thank you no apple yes nene is fine because it's salt you're imagining a sloppy nene think of a hard firm nene yeah firm nene in the rain hell yeah what about firm brunon uh firm brunons in the rhyne. What about this as a benefit to the rhyne? That also sounds like a term for idiots. Like, ah, just a couple of brunons in the rhyne.

You're going to be like, a couple of firm brunons. You're a bunch of firm brunons out there. Better than being a couple of sloppy brunons in the rhyne, am I right? It's better than being a couple of sloppy brunons in the rain, am I right? But if the rain is that strong, maybe it'll wash the green butter off your ham and ruin your eggs. Then I'm not eating them. I'm just washing my ham. Is it better to eat wet, cold ham than regular green ham?

No. Oh, wait. Maybe. If it's a downpour, the eggs, though, is the thing. Yeah, you, wait. Maybe. Yeah. If it's a downpour, the eggs, though, is the thing. Yeah, you still got to eat the eggs, but you just do that quick. Oh, it's like, no, because it's like egg soup. Look, rain is the worst right now. Then it is on a boat.

Eggs. And then it is feeding it to my goat. Right now, the goat is the front rimmer. The front rimmer. Right now, the goat is the front-runner. The front-runner. Right now, the goat is the front-winner. Front-runner? This next one pretty reasonable. Would you eat it in a car? I do love eating and driving. Oh, no, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. In the dark. Oh. Yes.

Oh, actually, 100%. In the dark Oh Actually 100% In the dark it's just buttery ham I don't know what I'm eating Because I don't know what I'm eating I'm less likely to eat it Imagine that slimy Buttery ham Slipping down your throat in the dark

This is a 6 to 1 situation Because I'm like well Yeah of course I'd eat it in the dark because I don't know what it is. But if someone's feeding me in the dark, I'm sus. Absolutely. If you're in the dark and Sam I am is like, would you eat these green eggs and ham? You're going to be like, well, I guess it just looks like ham to me. But then you put it in your mouth.

It's buttery and sloppy. What is this? If he's just saying, eat this ham and eggs, I'm like, all right. But if he's saying, eat these green eggs and ham, and I'm like, it's dark and I don't know, what is this if he's just saying eat this ham and eggs i'm like all right but if he's saying eat these green eggs and ham and i'm like it's dark and i don't know what is this it's a euphemism yeah yeah i don't know if i'll eat green eggs and ham in the dark i don't like eggs anyway so whatever but it's like hey it's just one of those things where if it's in the dark though yeah i'm i don't know where dark could see I think dark is in between rain and the ocean. For some reason, when I imagine eating in the dark,

I imagine eating in a train tunnel. I don't know what that's about. But, yeah, no, I don't think I could eat it in the dark. Well, there is, like, a restaurant you can go to where they just... Everything is in the dark. Okay. And they, like, serve you all the meals, whatever.

So it's meant to enhance the taste. Okay. And textures. Well, the taste and textures and flavours of this are not good. So with that in mind. Somehow it's worse in the dark. I feel like you'd be going to be like, all right, I'll give it a go. I'm not seeing it.

Got my eyes shut. But the moment it touches your lips and tongue and teeth, it's just going to be this buttery wetness. I apologise to the listeners because I feel like this is the most nauseating episode we've done in a long time. Dear Plumbing the Napster, I miss when you talked about fucking dogs.

Why do you talk about slurping buttery ham now? Or wet spaghetti? This show is ruined. Alright, so we're all agreed we're not eating them in the dark. No. Let's get that ranking.

No, no, no, no, no. You'll eat it in the dark? I'll eat it in the dark. I like eating it in the dark better than eating it with a goat. So eating in the dark is my number one. It will take me by surprise and I'll be frightened. But you reckon you could get through it and just throw up or whatever. Yeah.

Is that the goal? Which one of these can you do without throwing up. I reckon I'll be like, throw up or whatever. Is that the goal? Which one of these can you do without throwing up? I feel, yeah. I reckon the dark is probably the number one because it's going to, the instant,

when you see this, the thing that turns you off the most is sight. Yeah, absolutely. Because we're just imagining what it'll taste like and what it'll smell like. Yeah, yeah.

So I feel, yeah, I reckon dark beats goat. All right. Dark beats goat. All right, this one's one's easy this one i reckon we'd maybe i'll do it's just a change of location on a train it's better than eating on a boat well you're not getting any sea spray yeah you get to look at it i i'm mad at the train service for when it's like oh dinner time and i look they fucking pick up the silver goddamn thing and there's filthy green eggs and ham underneath. Describing it as filthy is making me not want to eat it.

But like, whatever, I want to try it. That's fine. It depends because, and it's going to come up again with the car, eating risky foods in a high speed situation can make you feel so much more sick than if you were just eating them. Yeah, that's true.

Imagine eating that the green eggs and ham after you so you remember boys when we went to Sydney on a train for 12 hours. Imagine you've woken up after your nap. Remember how you felt then and then someone puts in front of you a plate with green eggs and ham.

No. No. I would get up I would make a scene. I might just vomit into the green eggs and ham. I would look at whoever gave me that and stare them down the eyes as I tipped it over. The scary thing is if you spewed on it, someone could legitimately look over and be like, his looks better than mine. How come he got a good soup? I feel like the duck's still winning A goat is still winning for me

Because I only have to eat half the ham It's just unpleasant imagining a goat eat eggs On the train I imagine I feel disgusting already It's like when you wake up on a plane And they're like here's your prepared meal Plus it's got that weird It's been heated up, you know? Like, it's not coming fresh.

Train, for me. Oh, it does look like it's just been reheated eggs. Oh, reheated eggs. Look, it's above a boat, but only just. I'm putting it above a goat. Okay. But not above the duck. No, the duck, the duck, a train, the goat, the boat, the rain.

All right, all right, all right. What's next? Okay. In a car. Now, I'm a big fan of eating complicated food while driving. Yeah, absolutely. The more complicated, the better. The higher the risk, the higher the reward.

So because I'm not focusing too much on the food, I reckon I could do this. But I'm imagining this in between two slices of bread, because then I could eat like a sandwich. But that's not what's on offer here. No, no, no, no, no. You have to balance a plate on your lap. You can't.

You've got to wait. I guess you have the traffic lights. I am a man who has been known to eat Spag bol while driving. Yeah, I've seen it. The most fucked food I've had, I think, is gnocchi. Sushi was also hard to eat. Sushi's fun, though. Because you're putting sauce.

Yeah, yeah. We're bad people. Sauce and ginger and wasabi, and you're like, well, this is dangerous. Don't do this, everybody. I remember Ryder once eating an entire sticky-dick pudding while he drove. Did he eat it like an apple?

No, he just had it balanced on his lap, and then we were in traffic, and he's just eating away. I didn't know he had it until we arrived in traffic, and I looked over and he was eating. What a hero. I've seen people eat cereal when they're driving. That's always a fan of that. I just imagine you don't have the...

Like, okay, so you're at the traffic because you've got to cut the ham. Okay, hang on. Nah, you just stick your fork in there and take some bites. You're using your mouth, your teeth as the knife. Your mouth hole knives. Yeah, I'm not happy with that. Well, this also really comes into two categories because there is the eating whilst driving

or eating whilst just being in a car. That's true. Because eating whilst driving, I would probably say no just because it's... Look, I'm usually a brave boy, but I think I'm going to surrender to cowardice here and be like, this is too complicated for me to eat. Just imagine having to suddenly break and that big ham hock

slamming into your chest and leaving a sickly green stain on your body. A mark of shame. You arrive and we're like, Dusha, what's that big green saying? Because I eat green eggs and ham in the car. Dusha shouldn't eat green eggs and ham anyway. Do not eat them here and there anyway Do not eat them here and there Do not eat them anywhere The ham's the easiest part to eat of this meal whilst driving

It's the eggs Which are wet Yeah Because if they're scrambled There's a little bit of like, you know Moisture Moisture to it all It's gonna be hard to eat

Scrambled eggs are hard to eat whilst driving Yeah, yeah That just sounds pure complicated But would you eat them as a passenger? are hard to eat whilst driving. Yeah, yeah. They're just on pure complicated. But would you eat them as a passenger? I think it would be the same situation as the car, as the train, where I'd be like, this is going to make me feel very ill.

Yeah, absolutely. So, honestly, I think probably below a train, but just. I don't know, because imagine, right, the only time you're really ever eating this kind of meal in the car is when you stop at a servo. Yeah. Imagine getting this from a servo. Oh, servo, green eggs and ham. Gross.

That's heinous. Not for me. Yeah. Yep. So give me the rankings now, Dusha. In rhyme. I'd probably eat them in the dark. I'd probably share them with a goat. Damn. Yeah. I'd probably eat them in the dark. I'd probably share them with a goat.

Damn. Yeah. I'd probably eat them in the dark. I'd probably share them with a goat. I'd probably... What was your ranking? No, hang on. You don't have to rhyme each line.

I'd probably eat them in the dark. Eating with a goat? That's fucked. I'll eat them on the train but feel ill. Yeah. I'll eat them in a car but also feel ill. Yeah, great. I'll eat them in a car but only if it's still.

Yeah. Yes. I'll eat them in a car but only if it's still. The rain. Boat and rain. I won't eat them on a boat. The rain is just as bad. Yeah, alright, good.

Good rhymes. Alright, next comes a tree. In a tree? In a tree, yeah. I'm gonna eat him in a tree. Climbing that tree whilst holding a plate of green eggs and ham. It's too complicated.

I'm gonna drop some of it, which honestly is a plus. Yeah. Well, you don't have to do the whole thing now. Yeah, exactly. You're like, oh, well. Unless Sam-I-Am waiting at the bottom of the tree being like, you dropped some, here's another plate. Or Sam-I-Am being like, you dropped some,

and then he picks it up covered in dead leaves and dirt. A couple of ants. The dog shit. You wouldn't know. You'd be like, all right. Okay, I guess it looks just the same. It looks as appetizing as it always did. I guess if I'm climbing a tree, I've got a decent view now of whatever I'm looking at.

Yeah. So that's nice. But then I'm being surrounded by beautiful, imagining green scenery, and that's just going to remind me more of the green eggs and ham and how wrong it is. Yeah, there's also something about you'd be a bit tired after climbing the tree. You balance the plate precariously. I'd be very sweaty. You slide that slimy, buttery ham down your throat.

You scoop up the... It's going to be cold. Yeah. Unless the tree is right near the kitchen or wherever you think. I'm imagining it's in a field. You're eating cold green eggs and ham and you're trudging along a field you find the perfect tree to climb and you climb that tree and you sit there and then you're eating this i sort of imagine sam i am with a little gun he's like you didn't eat them on the you didn't eat them in your car we're going to a tree we're to find a context you like this green eggs and ham.

I'd probably put the tree. No, but I imagine a tree at the very least. Once I finish the green eggs and ham, I can be like, well, it's nice to be in a tree. Yeah. You know? And if you realize it's the worst experience you've ever had, you know what?

Just turn that tree into a hanging tree. Hey, I'm still putting this after dark, though. But I see, I also imagine like I'm up there, Sam I am down at the trunk. I just stuff it in the tray. I'm like, delicious. You're not eating that ham, though. But I see, I also imagine, like, I'm up there, Sam I am's down at the trunk. I just stuff it in the tray. I'm like, delicious. You're not eating that ham, though. Yeah, I gotta eat it. I gotta eat it.

I have to eat the green eggs and ham. I have to eat them. Yeah, look at, like, elbow dropping out of the tree. I'm free from you, Sam I am. Oh, yeah. Tree's not great. Okay. Tree's not too bad, though.

But, like, it's not bad, but I'd probably eat them over a car. Because you've still got to eat the green eggs and ham. In the dark it's a shock, but here it's just like you're eating it anyway. I can imagine also sunny. Yeah. So it's like real... Oh, like when ham gets slimy because it's had that heat on it. Oh!

So not only is it buttery slimy, it's got ham slime as well. And the eggs are like they've been cold, but now they're warm due to the sun. That's not good. Well, I feel this is on par with rain. Yeah. Oh, it's not quite. It's just too exposed to the elements for it to be appetizing.

Tree, right? Yeah. It's probably on par with boat, I feel. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because you're still getting the... It's not rain bad. It's not like you're like, I would not eat green eggs and ham

whilst holding them in the sun. It's like just holding them up to the sky. In the direct sunlight. Yeah, in 40 degree weather. All right, next one. In a box. Yes. This is my favorite scenario because it means if I eat them i get to get out of the box

oh because imagine if you close the box is that this is a scent of all this gonna just the box is gonna smell like green eggs and ham and you're not allowed out till you finish the green eggs and it's basically fucking torture. Well, it's the same as in the dark. Because I'm in the dark again, but I'm in an enclosed space this time. No, I reckon he's probably got, like, a light in there. I imagine you've got, like... I'm imagining a cardboard box.

So there's, like, where the handles are, some light streaming in. Yeah. Where you can put your lips to and breathe to get some fresh non-eggy hammy hair it just eggy air is it feels like torture it does feel like torture i think that's the worst for me eating it in a box because there's panic it's like i have to eat this green eggs and ham then what if i throw up you know what's what's the go there do i eat the green eggs and ham and then put my mouth to the thing and vomit out the little hand hole? I like the idea of him putting a hair dryer up to the...

By like, I mean I dislike immensely. But him being like, oh, is it not wafty enough? And just sticks a hair dryer. Oh, that's a lot of heat. Put a fan. Use a fan, Sam I am. Hot green eggs and ham. No.

Sam I am. I do not want that. Hate it. Actually, if you wait in the box for too long and like the smell. So say you said too hot. Yeah. It would be, you get sweaty. Yeah.

You don't want to eat it while you're, the ham's sweaty, you're sweaty. Sweaty ham. I don't eat no sweaty hams. It's slimy because it's green and buttery. You pick it up, you might drop it because it's surprisingly slippery. Yeah. So slippy. The sound of the ham falling out of your hand and landing on the plate on the eggs.

Just that. Slipping out of that and landing on the cardboard box. I mean, oh, yeah, cool. My favorite part about this dish is that you don't give us cutlery. We're using our hands are we eating the egg by scooping it up with our fists yes no this is making he has a fork i'm pretty sure he does eggs if we scrambled eggs sometimes you kind of fuck it up and like you kind of get a little tiny bit of like egg water or egg juice yeah egg juice let's call it egg juice that's real real good to you yeah it's gonna be you know when you're just like awful fucking i'm hey uh good morning

everyone time for me to just uh have my scrambled eggs and egg juice just drain those scrambled eggs so you're left with that egg juice that's gonna be green keep that egg juice it's gonna It's going to be like a clear green. I hate this so much. I've dry-ratched twice. All right. It would look like if a lime could piss. So that's definitely... I don't know if that's worse than in the rain. I feel yes. Well...

No. You know what? The rain, we went hard on the rain, and I'm thinking about this now. The rain is a zero out of ten when you start, but doesn't get any worse. Yeah, that's true. Where cardboard box could get worse. I feel like the rain, it'll just wash away my tears.

Yeah, no one can see. And if you spew in the rain, cleaned. Yeah, that's true. So is the rain getting a little higher up in the ranking? The more that I'm vomiting, the higher the rain is getting. I think for me it goes box. Box first. No, no.

Oh, I'm going from worst to best. Box first. Yeah, I like it. I like the panic that comes with it. Box. Oh, fuck. I don't even know. Box, dark, tree, train.

Dark is up there for you. No, it's crazy. fox does not sound nice. All right, next one. Fox, eating it with a fox. Same as goat. Yeah. Except that a fox... Look, a fox eating ham is all right.

A fox might have rabies. A fox eating eggs, especially scrambled. I'm just sus. I kind of like the fox for eating eggs. I'm like, you're a customer. You'll do anything. Does a fox smell as bad as a goat? Yeah, foxes have a stink.

It's a different stink to a goat's stink, but they got a stink. Also, the goat... Actually, fox is a bit different, because if the fox is eating a pig and looks happy, you'd be like, oh, yeah? Yeah. Maybe this is okay ham. But also, a fox might just give you a chew. Yeah, I was thinking the fox might attack me after I'm sick from all the green eggs and ham and weak.

The fox rounds on me. I feel like the fox weirdly might be easier to share with than the goat, though. Yeah, fox is less stubborn, and you have the power in a relationship with a fox. You don't have the power in a relationship with a goat. So there's that. I think fox is pretty high up, honestly.

Plus, you get to be super close to a fox, which is cool. That is kind of nice. I always like the idea of patting a fox, and then I remember they're super wiry. Yeah, they're not that good close-up foxes. They're a good faraway beast. Yeah, yeah. One of those distance animals. Yeah.

All right, fox, we're all on board with. Is it still the best? Is fox the best for you? No, dark is still the best. Yes. You want that nasty shock of buttery ham. But for you? No, Dark is still the best. Yes. You want that nasty shock of buttery ham. But then I'm just, that's all it is.

I don't know it's green. Yeah. It's just buttery ham. I guess. All right, another easy one. In a house. I mean, you can see it, which is rough. So that's second for me.

Yeah. I also imagine it coming out of the fridge. Third? Yeah, like as though they've cooked it two nights previous. They peel off the glad wrap. They place it on the table. Is the glad wrap wet? Yeah, of course. It's got the condensation.

It's got the meat condensation. Have you heated it up in the microwave? Yeah. So the scent is still kind of cold? Is a nan giving it to me? Yes. Does she cough on it? Is a nan...

She doesn't cough on it, but she looks sick. Just, here you go, darling. You're like, as she... Her breath smells like a sick person's breath. Does this make it better or worse? Adding, like, a little smidge of tomato sauce somewhere. Oh, worse. Worse.

Nothing's ever made anything worse, sir. Oh, God. Just's ever made anything worse. Just like mixing, because imagine the colour palette. It's Christmas. No, it's brown. It just goes brown. And no one wants to eat brown ham and eggs. And I'm imagining you're eating it on a plastic plate with a knife and fork alone in the kitchen.

Also plastic. Yeah, absolutely. Or Nan washes her teeth in the kitchen. Also plastic. Yeah, absolutely. Or Nan washes her teeth in the sink. Yeah. You're like, I guess. This is what visiting the fucking grandparents is all about. I hate this. And you know you've got to eat it all now because Nan will be mad if you don't.

She might give out a second helping. Oh, Nan will. If you finish it, she's like, good on you. Here's some more green eggs in hand. This may be up there with the box. I like the idea of her putting her teeth in a glass and then you ask her for a glass of water. Oh, no, no, no.

Her just pouring the glass out with her teeth, takes the teeth out, but then just fills up the glass and just gives it to you. Imagine this. I hate this, Nan. As you drink the water, the green from the green eggs and ham that is on your water

diffuses into the water, leaving it with that unpleasant green silt throughout the whole disgusting, dirty, dantial water. This might be the worst, because this scenario sounds like hell. This is worse than the box, boys.

Put me back in the box! Why did we go to Nan's house, Sam? I am... Whose Nan is this? At least in the box I know it's just what I'm eating in front of me. What other nightmares are in her nan's fridge? What's next?

Okay, this is the final one. Okay. A mouse. No. Why not? A mouse is cute. Mouse are dirty. Mouse are dirty.

No, thank you. Mouse are rodent. It nibbles a bit, you have a bit. I'm not eating nothing that's been touching no mouse lip. You don't want to share a mouse lip. I mean, what? Would you smooch a mouse? No, I'm not kissing the mouse.

You're basically kissing a mouse if you're sharing a food. I slice the green eggs in half. The mouse has one half. Better kill a mouse. Mouse is the best, but the mouse will die. That's too many food for a mouse. A mouse should not eat that much ham. Mouse will die.

Imagine me finishing the green eggs and ham, watching the mouse die. Yeah, mouse is bad, because the mouse will only finish, say, at most, an eighth of the green eggs and ham before dead. But also it will die in your eggs. Yeah, and then I still have to finish it off. Imagine picking up a dead mouse,

shaking it off, putting it next to you, and then having to eat the eggs it was just in. Imagine sucking the egg off the mouse by holding it by its tail, dipping it into your mouth, pulling it out, twirling it around, flinging it into the bin. Imagine using a mouse as your car. Hey, rim a chook and suck a mouse.

Roll that mouse around in your eggs until it gets nice and covered. And then suck that juice off that mouse. I'd prefer to suck the green off a mouse. Mouse is so bad. We've made all these situations so much worse for ourselves. Because then now that you've sucked a mouse, you've now got mouse fur all in your eggs and ham. Absolutely.

And like when things die, they shit themselves. Now you've got fucking mouse shit in your eggs and hair. Eating sucking shitty eggs off a mouse. And now it's going to look like little bits of raisins in your fucking eggs. And you're like, oh, maybe a sweet taste of, oh, no, it's just rat shit. For some reason, I imagine I'm still at Nan's as well like where are we is Nan senile? Nan's across from me watching me

suck her mouth suck the egg off her mouth I hate Nan put her in a home put her down take her to the vet my Nan made me green eggs and ham and then i had to suck the eggs off her mouth so i took her to the vet and shaved her arm and killed so yes what's our final ranking in the dark okay let do you want me to read you through them again

you can you can write them down and then say I will not eat them. We've got to do this properly, guys. If we're talking green eggs and ham, we need to have the rhyme. Otherwise, what's the fucking point? No, no, no. What have we got? What have we got? Our first one, if you'll recall, was a boat.

It seems so nice. Boat. Rain. Boat. Boat. Goat. Boat. Goat. Goat. Rain., goat. Boat, goat.

Goat. Rain. Rain, train. Train. Sorry, rain, dark, train. Car. Tree. Box.

Fox. House. House, in brackets, nan. Nan. Mouse. So I would not eat them in the dark. I would not eat them in a box. I would not... Oh, should I go from best to worst or worst to best?

Worst to best. Okay, so I would not eat them in the... Hmm. Sucking the egg off a mouse is pretty bad. Okay, so I'm just going to rank them Yeah, look I think I think I've got this

Okay, please I would not eat green eggs and ham at Nan's house I would not eat green eggs and ham with a mouse. I would not eat green eggs and ham in a box, nor would I eat green eggs and ham in the rain. Or with a fox. I would not eat green eggs and hams in a boat. Would not eat green eggs and ham in a train.

Yeah. Or a car. any automobile, really. I would, maybe, eat green eggs and ham with a fox. Okay. I guess I would share some green eggs and ham with a goat. Yeah. But I would eat green eggs and ham in the dark. That's still the best one for you.

See, I wouldn't eat green eggs and ham with a mouse. I would not eat them in a box. I would not eat them in a house owned by Nan. Really, a box, you'd rather the Nan's house than a box. That's strange. I would not eat them in the dark. I would not eat them in the rain. I would not eat them in the rain. I would not eat them in a tree. I would not eat them on a train.

I would not eat them with a goat. I would not eat them on a boat, but I would eat them with a fox because that seems kind of cute. Well, I forgot tree, but oh well. I would not eat them on a boat. I would not eat them with a goat. I would not eat them on a boat. I would not eat them with a goat. I would not eat them in the rain. I am playing wrong this ranking game. I would not eat them in a box.

I would not eat them with a fox. I'd rather die than go to Nance. But I'd fucking meet him in the dark, I guess. I will not eat them, Sam. I am. Go fuck yourself, Sam. I am. I'm not eating green eggs. That's the one takeaway rhyme. Go fuck yourself, Sam. I'm not eating green eggs and ham. That's the one takeaway rhyme.

Go fuck yourself, Sam. I'm not eating green eggs and ham. I was on board at first and now I'm not. And on that note, I've been Joel. I've been Jackson. And I've also been Joel. And we've been sick. Thanks for listening and if you want to

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Thank you again for listening, and we'll see you again next time. Good night for now. But not forever. Kisses.