Plumbing the Death Star - What are the Implication of the Snap? (Endgame Spoilers, You Idiots)

Episode Date: May 5, 2019

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Sands Pants Radio. Go on, spoil endgame, you big idiot. Hey, do you sometimes think, I wonder if those handsome voices match their handsome faces? Well, the short answer is yes. We're beautiful. And if you want to see our beautiful faces play board games, head on over to twitch.tv slash sandspantsradio every Friday at 11.30am Melbourne time. That's twitch.tv slash sandspantsradio. Hey everyone and welcome to this week's episode of Plumbing the Death Star,

where we ask the important questions like, what are the implications of the snap? And before we start, spoilers for Endgame. So if you haven't seen it and want to be surprised, maybe stop listening to this garbage and waste your time on something that's actually good. Unless you don't care, in which case, good. Please keep listening. Or you like getting things spoiled. You like the pain. The thrill. The C&B torture

of the audio medium. Well, we got you. Kick me in the balls and then whisper spoilers for movies I'm excited for. That's the only way I can get hard these days. Hard but not off. Yeah. I also like edging.

It's complicated. Me and my penis have a complicated relationship. Anyway, so Infinity War ends with a snap, and in Endgame there is another three snaps. It's a snap-heavy film. Yeah. There's a third snap. The first one happens offscreen.

So you get the Infinity War snap. Yeah. The Infinity War snap, which is the snap that wipes out 50%. I hate that we're calling it a snap, by the way. It's a click, Frank. Well, the movie calls it a snap. Yeah, Americans call it a snap. We call it a click. They also call it the decimation, which is 10%,

but it's actually 50%. So they've just picked a scary sounding word that doesn't actually mean what they think it is that's just everyone quintimation they should call it Thanos' Thanos' big click

ever since Thanos' big click the world has been wrong so you get the infinity wall snap, click fuck it, click g'day, mate. Thanos clicked. Well, went up the shitter. 50% of the cunts dead.

Second click. Second click is off screen, and this is the way that they find Thanos. Where Thanos- I forgot about that click. You're right. Thanos clicks again and is like, you know what? I hate these stones. He uses the stones to destroy the stones, which is funny if you're one of the stones.

A shock to the stones. It's funny to think of them like genies, which they are, I guess. They literally say that they have souls and are beings, so that's hilarious. Hey, destroy yourself. What? Damn. Well, burn your arm then. All that's hilarious. Hey, destroy yourself. What? Damn. Well, I'll burn your arm then.

All right, fine. So at this point, snaps, the consequences of the snaps. Do we want to go through the different clicks? Pretty self-explanatory with the first two.

I don't know. Conscious implications. Implications of the first click is 50% of the world is gone and 50% of the universe is gone and 50% of the universe is gone. 50% of all life. But that means also it's not just that. It's more because there are people that got, like,

disappeared in a moment of importance, i.e. flying a helicopter. Cop on a blowie. Cop on a blowie. I don't know who that's going to kill. I can't imagine how that isn't important. I mean, look, a mouthful of dust ain't great. Actually, when the end result is a mouthful of cum.

Or a mouthful of cum, but then half of that goes. Yeah, does it count? Is everybody 50% infertile now? Oh, my God, I only have one. Oh, no. No, but the 50% is random. So some people can have no sperm. Yeah. Oh my god, I only have one Oh no No, but the 50% is random So some people can have no sperm Other people still 100% sperm

That's true, okay, thank goodness But yes, that means that some people are infertile Yeah, that's rough So the first click that happens There's a lot of, I guess, you know, you see, we see it There's a lot of grieving A lot of moving on I think nobody, I wouldn't know

If we were in the middle of an episode and you both got on. I think nobody, I wouldn't know. If we were in the middle of an episode and you both got dusted, I would be like, what? Like, I wouldn't be like, Thanos did it. No, but you'd be like- What is going on? So- Am I dead? Are we going to use the knowledge

that we get from Endgame for this? Or are we just going straight from the, okay. So yes, you're right. At first, everyone would just be like, what, like, what do you see in the end credits? What do you see in the end credits of Infinity War where Nick Fury's like, motherfucker, but he's not brave enough to say fuck?

Yeah, I know. But that means we know that fuck is a word capable of being said in the Marvel Universe. That's a big takeaway here. There's a plumbing in its own right. Why do people know fuck is a word but don't say it? They say shit heaps in Endgame. Yeah, shit, but that's okay, apparently.

Fuck, you can't do. I don't know what that's about. But it is real. Yes, it's real. Fuck is real in Avengers. Anyway. Aunt May thinks it at one point, too. Yeah, it's a word people know of, but they just don't say.

It's the worst word. That is the worst word. That's weird. Anyway, so the first click happens. You don't know what's going on. You probably go into the streets. But then eventually, within a day, I imagine, because it seems like the Avengers are pretty open about what happened.

I disagree. And you know why I disagree? Why? Because in Endgame, when Ant-Man comes back, there's missing person posters all over the place. But they're old. Yeah, but there's enough time. Not a day.

Yeah, you're printing them out. You're not going to, like, the local office works. Yeah, I'm not, like, in a day. Especially if you go to the local office works and it's just dust. Counterpoint, those missing persons might be people that may or may not have got dusted but left. Or, again, you'd be like, oh, you think they you're holding on to hope that they didn't get dusted. The implications here of that is people are sad because like, did they get dusted?

Or did people who maybe not been in such a great situation are going to be like, I'm going to take this opportunity to chew off. Oh yeah, true. Because the reason that I know that the general public, at least five years later, so within five years, everyone definitely knows because Cap says to a bloke before Thanos, like he says the name Thanos and the guy isn't like, what the fuck are you talking about?

Also, aren't you Captain America? Did you fuck this up? Yes. And yes. It'd be very funny. Me like on the couch watching with like dust next to me. I'm like,

don't we have guys for situations like this? thought do we have all these guys for this i thought you were gonna say you're sitting next to catches with dust you're like didn't i have guys that lived here didn't i know two other dudes i think apart from the grief and the the the the terrible sadness of the world must feel there's gonna be a lot of skills and professions that just... That is also true. I was thinking just like bureaucracy as we know it has gone out the window. I was thinking, as you said, like, didn't we have guys that used to live there? Imagine paying rent, but do I know that my landlord's around? Who owns property now?

I would absolutely not pay my rent for a month, just see what happens. And even if he comes and he's like, hey, where's rent? You're like, mate, did you see what happened? Come on. You care about money now? Mate, everyone's dusted. Oh, yeah. Money would be an issue.

Like, economy. Because 50% of people that were spending money now are not. And you've also got all that money in that bank account that are going untouched. Yep. For people to do delicious scams and pretend to be dusted people and get that money. Would you loot?

I think I'd loot. Yeah. Because, like, a whole shop might get dusted. Yeah. That's free stuff. Let's say the first month is just absolute anarchy. Absolutely. Cops are dusted.

So are criminals. Cops and robbers It's very funny Every cop is gone Just a quirk of the clique I guess It was all meant to be random but it's a little bit subconscious And he hated authority

It's funny to think that if he had Just thought I want the Avengers gone He'd be good And also 50% he wins It says all life, right? Yeah. Does that include the microbes in our body that keep us alive? Probably.

I guess not. I guess Thanos cut it off there. Well, Thanos also seems to not want... Because there's some weird implications, like people dying in helicopter crashes and stuff, because you see a helicopter crash at the end of Infinity War. I imagine that that probably counted. And again, what you see a helicopter crash at the end of infinity war i imagine that that probably counted and again what you see in end game makes me think that there's like some subconscious control meaning that he probably counted that as yeah yeah yeah

it's also it's interesting so like we leave behind residue when we die yeah but that had to be a conscious choice thanos had to be like i'll'll make him disappear. And as a Flores, they'll become dust. There's not like a side effect of the clip. He should have made them pop. Yeah, it could have been anything. They could have popped into like big inflatable clams. Like another ones you punch. Yeah, I know.

That wasn't the thing we stopped to think about. But they go into dust. But is everyone left with a pile of dust? Or does that also just kind of like disappear? Oh, I don't know. Maybe the dust does disappear. It sort of does. Yeah, both.

Okay. I thought the wind just maybe took it. A little bit of both. I was just thinking that our seas are full of dust now because half the fish. Everyone got cremated. Yeah. Weird choice on Thanos' part.

So, yeah, so you've got this like just, just... I don't even know where to start, because if 50% of the population is up and went, and it's random, it's not just, like, certain countries or whatever, the power structure of our current world would change. It's basically an apocalypse. Yeah, like, America, who's to say if America would still be, like, the powerhouse that it is? Because it would really depend on who went.

Exactly. It would depend on who went. Exactly. It would depend on who went and where they're, you know what I mean? I like to imagine Australia is completely untouched by coincidence. We don't even notice. Like every natural disaster, we are untouched. We just look at it and are like, Christ. Crikey. Construed.

That's no good. Well, it's bloody content. Anyway, back to my snacks But again 50% of say rat population gone Good Yeah that's pretty good but they'll come back to 100% rats Any day now Well that's something that we see in Endgame

Of rats still out and about Because a rat saves the day There's probably more rats than people now at this point. Yeah, Thanos is a fucking idiot because people are like, animals aren't capable of feeling, their world isn't going to be fucked as much as he thinks they are. They're just going to be like, hey, more resources. Sweet.

It's going to be a ratpocalypse. So big increase of rats. I didn't count on the rats. It's very funny to them all arriving in Endgame Without us as Shaq and instead of being like Hey they're like do you know how many rats are on the planet now You idiot So many god damn rats you fucking fool

People were eating burgers And then they died and then they dropped their burgers And now rats ate the burgers And now rats love to fuck This is exactly how they say not to do this This is how pests happen. You keep a dirty house, you get rats. You keep a dirty earth, you get more rats.

And we do see a lot of dirty earth. Yeah. Like a lot of suburban areas, which you would have been pre-snap. Very, very clean and upkept. Now, who gives you shit? It'd be like a malaise that kind of went through the population of just not caring i think you would get a weird thing where half the population would be like well what's the point and half the population would be like hell yeah no rules time to eat a baby or

whatever everyone's logical first step yes but yeah i think they just be the what we what we see in endgamegame really goes against I feel what would probably actually happen if 50% of the world went away I just don't think it would be that structured Fortnite still exists so does like basic internet access

someone's keeping Fortnite going is it still getting updates after people are dusted Hulk dabs which I missed the first time, but I realized it's because it's a real shit dab. Yeah, it's not an ideal dab. It just goes like this.

It's not really a dab. I did it, but no one can see. This is an audio medium. Watch the movie. I did that. Dabbing still exists. The internet still exists. He says dab.

Cars still kind of, you know what I mean? Power. Power still exists. Power still going. And also, I guess, what is Stark? Like, Stark's car is very well kept. Yeah. But I guess that's just Stark.

I think you're just going to get 50% of the population are going to go absolute ham on just, I don't know. Ant-Man's old truck still works. That was already barely working before this. But you also have enough of a government still running to come together and make a remembrance shrine or like yeah plus you got the avengers i gotta think that as well i'm sure that whatever was left were like well yeah well you do see that because you do see um you know a black widow kind of operating the avengers and kind of getting a sit rep from everyone around yeah so i'm guessing with the avengers maybe they averted an apocalypse. Yeah, kind of. Captain Marvel does say, you know, I'm in other worlds,

and they don't have you. Yeah, exactly. So I'm going to assume that they were sorting out whatever. They saved the day secretly twice in Endgame. It's just that one was a less glamorous, didn't involve a battle, it just involved a lot of bureaucracy. What if we look at it like the Watchmen ending? What if the world was just like, oh, fuck me.

Who cares about our Earth shit? Space is frightening. Let's band together. And maybe that's what happened. Yeah, yeah. Because again, I was thinking after, say, Avengers 1, would they be like, holy shit, space shit, space whales, oh no. But you do see a lot of doubt in, say,

I think it was the post-credits of Avengers 1, where people have been like, I didn't even know if that was a real, probably conspiracy. Plus, maybe it's just there were, like, the human beings of, like, the MCU, just resilient, who were like, yeah, whatever. But now, because, again, there was that kind of moment of doubt you can have with, say, the Chithuru coming in. But now it's like, no, I saw my mate get dusted in front of me.

Yeah, I guess space shit's real. Yeah, I feel like after Avengers 1, if I'm in the studio and you two become dust, I'm like, nah, I saw my mate get dusted in front of me. Yeah, I guess space shit's real. Yeah, I feel like after Avengers 1, if I'm in the studio and YouTube become dust, I'm like, yeah. Makes sense. I'm sad, but not shocked. Because you've got to think about in the average citizen MCU,

they've been through a lot. You go through Avengers 1, yes, you get a space invasion, but that was pretty much New York. And so if you went from there, you could kind of be like, did it really happen? I reckon they're kind of exaggerating. Then robots attacked, and you're like, oh. They're all living in a weird world, I guess.

Maybe that's weird, isn't it? Robots came in. Then they destroyed us with a big old hunk of country. But then they're like, Iron Man. But then in the Infinity War, it's a big world. Yeah, and then you're like, I guess maybe those things did happen and shit. Also, remember that time with that big purple thing in middle America just attacked everyone?

No one mentions that anyway. Hey, guys, Galaxy 2 happened. Crazy. I'd probably put your dust in little jars and wait. I'd be like, they'll be back. Would you water us? Well... Would you drink me? I may forget you is what I'm thinking. What's this dust?

I'm gonna put a plant in this grow a plant in us mix us together turn us into soil please do is this fertilizer jackson it's labeled j and j yeah why'd i do that yeah yeah why did you why didn't you go z and d which one was which i'll just mix them together i saw them together a lot anyway if they become one guy when the avengers fix this no big loss would you assume the avengers were gonna fix this as as a citizen probably i think they've fixed so much in the past i'd be like the avengers will sort this out five years down the track i might be like hmm well that's kind of the implication from endgame like five years later is like when everyone's totally been like, oh, this is it, I guess.

And again, in the same speech to Captain America says Thanos, he also kind of implies that they're just like rebuilding now. Yeah, yeah. So I think there's like that five year where there was chaos. If there's hope, then there's no hope. Yeah. All right. So that's the implications of one click.

One of four. Yeah. Second click. Soulstone, I guess, is the saddest. Oh, I'm a guy. Oh, I guess, is the saddest. I'm a guy! I've got a soul in me! You killed Gamora for me. Now you're killing me for me.

Red Skull out of a job. Yeah, Red Skull being like I like to imagine Red Skull just as a little sick up. What does Red Skull do? So you go in there. There's only one Soulstone. You push a goat off a little sick up. Hey, what does Red Skull, what does he do when, so you go in there, you push it. It's only one soul stone.

I know, you push a goat off a cliff or whatever. Yeah. You love that goat. I love that goat. You get the stone. Is he like, cool? Yeah, is he like, yeah, you did it.

Yeah, when you bring it. Or is he free now? Did you just free a Nazi? Goodbye. Thank you for coming. Thank you for coming now. Can someone take me back to 1942, please? I am still a Nazi somehow.

Space has not changed me. I'm still bad. I am still a piece of shit. Hey, it's funny to just like, you get there and he's like, you must destroy the thing you love. And I'm like, what if I love you? He's like, you don't love me. Maybe I do.

He's like, only one way to find out. Jump off. No, but he's stronger than me. He pushes me off. turns out he loved me oh that's my last thought he truly loved me yeah okay red skull out of a job maybe that's good or bad hard to say sort of much of a much yeah yeah it's like you know you were keeping a nazi at bay but you also were employing a nazi yeah what else can really? I don't know how I feel about your stones. Timestone means that the Sorcerer Supreme has well and truly cooked it.

I mean, at this point, he's dead and had well and truly cooked it, but now it's- He's cooked it. He's really cooked it. Wong's in trouble, basically. Wong being like, shit. Wong does a little sick up of his own. Oh, no. I'm so fired. up of his own. Oh, no. I'm so fired.

Oh, wait, my bosses are dead. Woo! Wait, I'm the boss. Ah, I gotta fire myself. It's only right. The second sick up is stress. It's not magic. Hey, Wong's in charge now.

That's good. Yeah, Wong is the Sorcerer Supreme for those five years. I hope they make a TV show. That would be cool. I like Wong. Wong, Sorcerer Supreme. What a name for a show. I can't stop thinking of Sorcerer Supreme as a pizza for a while. Yeah. Give me that Sorcerer Supreme.

The actor who plays Wong's name is Benedict Wong, I'm pretty sure. That's weird. That's good. I'm going to check that, but I'm pretty sure it's right. So I guess in terms of all soul, like all the stones disappearing, it's kind of much the muchness. But we do hear from old mate, the original Sorceress Supreme. Tilda Swain.

She was being like, without the stones, this universe is kind of fucked. So kind of fucked. His name is definitely Benedict Wong. And yes, the universe is fucked without the stones. I know. She's like, it's not good. Do you know how much magic she wants to eat Earth always? Please don't take the stones.

Once there's no stones, man. Damamu might come back. But does that mean that Thanos the whole time has been keeping Damamu at bay? No, but I think it's like- Is Thanos the sorcerer's friend? I think technically yes, because he has the time stone. He's not keeping him in a bed. Demamu kind of gave up and fucked off.

But if Demamu realises what's happened, he might be like, I'm back. See, Demamu going and being like, just chilling in his dimension and being like, oh man, I really wish I could eat earth. And then like little goblin being like, and then the goblin turns to dust and he's like maybe I can eat her or maybe Damamu got turned to dust we don't know

Damamu gets dusted can Damamu get dusted is Damamu a guy he's life is he life he was life but he existed in a place where there was no time so I think maybe he exists in a state where he was no time. So I think maybe he exists in a state where he was always dusted, but never dusted.

Well, enough of that. I'd rather not think about it. Thank you, next. So I guess... And then the other stones, whatever. Most of them are on Asgard or whatever. Who cares? Let's put the implications there of being like,

suddenly the stones being, where people? And then getting gone. Being like, I hate this forced suicide. You're mean. And if you thought clicks had been bad for Earth with one and two, wait till we get to number three. Look, our universe is susceptible to magic bullshit.

Sad. And now click three. Right. So imagine you're living in a house sweet that's nice yeah three people live there oh all of a sudden now there's six hi same resources imagine if that happened everywhere yeah yeah that's less than ideal and everyone who appears is five years younger yes so like immediately you've got giant problems of, like, well, first off- The economy's fucked again, but in the other way. The economy's fucked because we have now for the last five years,

those who survived have just been producing resources and, like, whatever anyone needs for the people that remain. Now we have a sudden influx of a lot of people. That's going to be a giant problem. Do you reckon when they came back from the snap, they needed to take a shit? Yeah, I was just thinking that. I was genuinely just thinking like, I reckon you'd be full.

I reckon if you were about to before this first one, yes. Afterwards, no. Because it's exactly as you left it. He didn't snap my shit away. He didn't. I'd be scared. I'd need to shit more. I'm back. That's't. I'd be scared. I'd need to shit more. I'm back.

That's good. Where's the toilet? Also from like a, I guess a philosophical or even a religious standpoint, because we do hear from Peter Parker that one minute he was on Titan, then he was back again. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so it's kind of like that. He says, I think I passed out, then I woke up.

He's like, Doctor Strange, like, five years have passed, we need to go, and he's like, all right, cool, let's go. So in that moment, like we're in non-existence or death, there's just, there's nothing. Well, they've experienced death, so they know if there's an afterlife or not, and by that, there's not. Yeah.

So it's just straight up not. It's cool that Endgame proves that there's no afterlife. So again, religious now is kind of moot. But then again, I think in the MCU, Thor is also a kind of like, if you're a religious person in the MCU, you'd see Thor and

be like, huh? Yeah. Yeah. I'd be like, is this Jesus? So you'd be like, Hammer Jesus. We've got Hammer Jesus

there. Interesting. Those and those mythology. Is Hulk Jesus? Okay, that's straight. Captain America. All right. I don't know how Hulk came Okay, that's straight. Captain America, all right.

I don't know how Hulk came about as the layman. I can tell you one thing, though. Bloke with bone, not Jesus. Not Jesus. Not even a decide... Who is this guy? Get a real job. So I think the religious aspect of the MCU

in terms of Earth would be gone. It's crazy that Spider-Man's going to grow up knowing that when he dies, that's it. Yeah. Spider-Man. It's crazy that Spider-Man is going to grow up knowing that when he dies that's it. No heaven for Spider-Man. Not just Spider-Man. 50% of life. Unemployment rate is above 50%.

Yeah, that's good. I also keep thinking that like I said, when the first snap happened people would go wild. Because you think that's it. Imagine the Avengers are like, we're going to fix it fix it and you're like oh no don't um also again in terms of that kind of concept is like now you've seen people reverse death yeah in that universe if someone dies could you be like you fix it yeah that's true like you expect the avengers too you fucked with grief yeah yeah it's sort of what i'm getting at five years is well and truly long enough that people have made their peace

and have moved on. You're going to have husbands coming back to wife and meeting new husband. Absolutely. You're going to have me in the kitchen hearing a glass smash. What? Who's here? And I get you both in the back. Intruders.

You're also going to be, again, people know that Thanos is like, so people know that There's people of Big power basically That exist in the world That can alter reality You might be in denial You're going to

You're going to go through Stages of grief But for people returning Yeah yeah Because you're going to be People being like I had hope I was five years

Now you're back I don't believe this I don't believe this And then the opposite You're going to be dusted again Or I don't think you are Who you are I think you're an imp I don't believe this. I don't believe this. Either you're going to be dusted again, or I don't think you are who you are. I think you're an imposter. I think you are.

There might be people just like stabbing people, being like, you're not my loved one. Yeah, that's good. Also, the people who were dusted are now back. The people that they knew are totally different people. First off, they're aged five years, and their whole personality is changed. Yeah, I know.

But like when Peter Parker and old mate. No, no, no. Yeah, I know, but when Peter Parker and old mate... No, no, no. Ned could have also been dusted. Oh, that's true. I guess maybe Ned was dusted. Yeah, fair. No, he wasn't, because you see him mourning Peter Parker at the end of Infinity War. He wasn't dusted. I think so. I don't know about that.

Look, I'm not going to make that claim. When do you think that scene takes place? On Titan. When they're showing the consequences of the snap, maybe? They don't show the consequences of the snap. Are you sure he's not on Titan? Isn't the coin doing it?

Is Ned on Titan? Is he on Titan? When Spider-Man gets busted, does Ned go, oh, no! Because the end of Infinity War is the snap happening, the click happening. Then the last words of that movie as Captain America collapsed. And he was like, oh God. And then the credits start.

Okay. I just thought, yeah. And then you get, then you get New York and then you get the snap, the click happening there. Yeah. The click still doesn't feel natural. I'm going to keep powering through. Yeah.

Good. It's for my fallen Australian brethrens that got snapped out of the click, clicked out of the click. Never forget those cunts. Alright, I guess maybe Ned doesn't. But again, the only time you see Ned is on the bus at the start

and he's like, I'll distract them. Shouldn't have distracted them. I thought you have like a shot of Ned watching everyone get dusted from the bus. Spider-Man's on Titan at that point. No, he doesn't watch Spider-Man get dusted. He's been on a bus for a long time. He sees everyone else get dusted.

Let me know in the comments. Yeah, but. So you're right. Maybe he wasn't. But they're still at high school. I don't know. Yeah, but it's because that. So their friends have fucked off for five years,

but they're still in high school. Their education hasn't changed. I get it. No. I get it. No, I get it. That's just a weird, although it's weird because Ned has gone back to school and this is clearly the first time he's seen Peter since it all went down,

which means that this is presumably the first day back. Yeah. Which means. See, that's why I think it's weird because if Ned was snapped, then only a second has passed for him and he wouldn't have that emotion if he was clicked. I'm so sorry.

He wouldn't be so emotional seeing Peter. He'd just be like, I mean, he would be a bit, but that was like a, oh my God, Peter, you've returned kind of tear. I think the unfortunate thing is actors don't age differently. That's what I mean. So maybe what I'm saying is maybe they just aged everyone up. But then if you're going to do that, that means Peter Parker's friends are 20 years old and he is 15.

Yeah. Or 16 and 21, he is 15. Yeah. Or 16 and 21, which is still not good. Maybe they just won't explain it. Look, my hot tip is that's absolutely going to happen. Because if there's one thing that happens in Endgame that people aren't really talking about, but I feel... Give it another couple of weeks. Very hand wavy.

But I feel like that soon, especially with Spider-Man coming out, people are like, hang on a second. Wait, wait a minute. Which is fine. When you've got a time travel movie, you've got to do stuff like that. I get it.

Exactly. I'm not angry at you, Marvel. I just want you to think. Look, here's a message I've just gotten from the Russo brothers. It says, shush. Oh no, they're trying to silence us. Isn't it Russo brothers?

Sure. They're mad we keep calling them the Russo Brothers. Hashtag don't plumb the end game. Too late, idiots, we've done it. So yeah, I think the whole age gap thing is going to be weird. Also, don't cast yourself in your own movie. Nah, it was good. I think you're going to talk about like-

I liked the character, but I didn't like that it was him. I didn't even know, it was fine. Joe Russo. Russo. Joseph Rousseff. I think also now you're going to have a bureaucratic nightmare because, again, now that these people that we thought were gone are back. And now it's like anything where you're applying in terms of age

like birthday like imagine okay so you're 15 or in no you're 16 in america when the snap happens yeah you come back can you legally buy booze your id says you're 21 sure does your face says you're 16 yeah your brain thinks you've lived for 16 years but you've existed for 21 here's a hard question do people come back to where they were clicked from so i've seen people discuss this online because professor hulk does the snap i would say that there's no one falling out of the sky i was imagining train drivers getting hit by trains appearing sitting in the air and like the subway falling to the ground smooshed i would say that it was look. But then you gotta pick somewhere.

That's so weird to be like everybody Well it depends because it depends. We don't know how if it works like a wish because if you're like I want everyone who was erased from existence to return safely, that could be enough. Yeah, that's fair. That's fair. And also we don't know if it's going to be like people that died

because say you're a passenger in that also, we don't know if it's going to be like people that died because, say you're a passenger in that helicopter and you don't get clicked away, but the pilot does. Do you come back? I don't know. Yeah, that's a good question. And now a quick word from our sponsor. Well, just a weird pause, but while I have you here,

have you heard of our sister podcast, Shut Up A Second? I'm not in it, so already we're off to a great start. Jackson hosts it, and it's just comedy without the pretense of pop culture garbage. So, if you're tired of us talking about a Star War, a current Avenger, or that Harry Pot Pot bloke, why not check out Shut Up A Second? There's currently almost 300 episodes of pure, unadulterated nonsense available on iTunes or directly from our website,

sanspantsradio.com. Yeah, you're right. It's going to be like, I want people who disappeared because of the click to come back. Yes, all who got clicked were people that were directly affected. It's like everyone who was killed by the click

or the results of the click. But what about the people who were killed indirectly by the clique? What if you, you know, you're, you know, you've lost a lot of people and you are falling in a sense of depression.

And unfortunately you've decided, you know, that has been, that is a direct result because of the clique. You're telling me that like, say mass suicide, isn't going to be a big problem after the result of the clique. I'm going to assume that Hulk would have taken that into consideration.

But then that's, yes, but that means that there's going to be people. So I get what Zaman's saying, because this is a weird situation either way. Because the moment- Hulk doesn't bring those people back, or he brings them back, but they have memories of what happened. What's weird is that Hulk is the Infinity Stones

and controller of everything. He could just make everyone happy. In that moment, Hulk has so much power. Everyone's back and hard. Everyone's horny. Hulk loves horn. Everybody just gets a massive erection and the gauntlet explodes.

Hulk! Damn it! This is going to go eventually. I imagine if it was normal Hulk to the snap and not Professor. Hulk smash. Nothing changes. All the buildings just get squished like ants.

Good. And then he passes out. Hulk. Oh my God. Why didn't we give Hulk the gems? That was Tom of us. I really liked, can I just,

in Endgame where Hulk's like I'll do it and like obviously the glove it moved to fit him but it's funny to imagine Stark being like it's not designed for your hands I'm gonna have to build a whole other glove lovely but I'm back in four what are we gonna do

it's also funny that Thanos had to go to a bloke who uses the power of a sun to create a glove to hold the stones, and then Iron Man's like, all right, I can just make one. Oh, God, this is pretty easy. He made two. That's what an Iron Man's do,

that just holds them if he wants them to. He's clever. Yeah. So, yeah, so the implications of bringing- Thanos is dumber than Iron Man confirmed. So, again, the implications of bringing a little bit back from the dead, that's fine, but how far does Professor Hulk go? Because again, the moment that the click happens,

you've created this giant spiral that is kind of resulting in a lot of decisions and a lot of problems. Before we take that very seriously, let's just rewind to what we mentioned at the start of today's episode of like 50% of sperm going. Your balls are back and heavier than ever. That's a bit of weight.

Hulk gave everybody an extra 50%. The next one's gonna be a big one. A gift from Hulk to the world. Thanks. Okay. I'm feeling fertile. Hello. I'm back in full. Time to make a mess.

So yeah, so again, you have so, and this is Earth, and you have like so much problems of that. Plus, also I'm thinking, just animals, birds, so like... And we know that it affects them, because that's how Ant-Man knows that it worked.

Heaps of birds. Oh man oh man those rats so many rats oh no and they're not gonna because imagine being a bird yeah and you like pop in you're like well world's changed a bit now well back to pecking at the wonderful thing about a bird is that it hasn't realized anything's different that's great that's like you know they say that a duck from like 400 years ago and a duck today don't notice the change. If you brought a duck back in time, it would be like, I'm still a duck. Nothing has changed. Because again, there are

creatures, animals that would have hit that population like, you know, easy to recover. Like rats. Would have been like, whatever, 50% of us are gone. Give us three weeks. Yeah, exactly. Within three weeks, the rats could hit like, whatever, 50% of us gone. Give us three weeks. Yeah, exactly. Within three weeks, the rats could hit back. Now 50% are back again.

Does it? And depending on how he worded the snap, is that a 50% of the new amount of rats? No, it's just an amount that disappeared. So five years ago, a lot of rats went and now they're back. Rats are back. The rats are back, baby. That's 150% rats. Yeah.

But maybe more. Yeah, because in five years, chances are the rat population is pretty much- Would increase on a rate more rapid than a regular five-year period. You're right. It is the perfect environment for rats. And then 50% of those rats are back. The next Avengers movie will be the Avengers v. Rats. Imagine the amount of rat kings.

Oh, my God. Spiraling through New York. Yeah, that's trouble. So, yeah, apart from, like, just the, you know, it's hard to judge where people started and ended in terms of, like of when the click happened and five years from then, because some people moved on, some people didn't.

Look at Tony Stark, he has a daughter. How many other people out there who have moved on and done the same thing, and now suddenly it's like, okay, I have a daughter, and also my four kids that disappeared, and my old husband slash wife. Imagine if Hawkeye's hair came back when this snap happened.

Imagine. My hair was a guy. Yeah, Hulk is like, everyone gets sick fades. He had so much power during that snap and he wasted it. Did he? He could have done plus. He could have done everyone's back plus. And also another

problem here is why didn't he do the snap that what he could have easily just done the same thing that happens later in the movie oh yeah yeah but he didn't he didn't know that was a problem i would have thought about it so i want to erase thanos from existence forever yeah like i might as well do it's like why at no point was Thanos like, with my incredibly powerful glove, the Avengers don't exist. Cool, I'm good now. Because it wasn't personal for him. Yeah, but it's just practical at that point.

Yeah, because he didn't think they were... He thought he was inevitable. Also, again, you're thinking about... The reason he doesn't care is that I am me. Yeah, dumb of an iron man. We're just thinking about Earth. You're thinking about other... Think about, say, the Nova Corps,

thinking about the people that were after. The Nova Corps come back? They got killed. The entire planet got wiped out whilst they were grabbing the Power Stone. They probably don't come back. That's true. But it depends. Again, where did the click start for Hulk?

No, because, again, like, Vision Vision's not back so I guess the Nova... Oh yeah, actually, then we get... Oh, all the Asgards! That sucks. Thor at the end being like, I saw you brought back the Nova Corps, and Hulk being like, yeah. Asgardians? Didn't think about them.

Who were the people chasing the Guardians of the Galaxy in 2? The ones that were making- The gold men. Yeah, the gold people that were making Adam Warlock. Yeah. The goldos.

Whatever. Anyway, basically- Goldilocks. Advanced civilizations, alien races, because they've also been affected by the snap. Yeah. Click, sorry. They've also been affected by the click. So these people are being like, okay, cool.

That's happened. That sucks. Well, they're probably not going to have this weird hope of like bringing them back so they're going to move on and they have technology better than us so they're going to adjust and adapt you have five years of so many alien races and worlds adapting to this and moving on and putting things in place systems in place that will take this into account you then have imagine being in like the outer worlds the outer rim or whatever being like we've had to deal with this because they had probably a star

war imagine being in a star war but you you know you don't have you have probably no knowledge of what happened maybe because thanos is a big player in space not necessarily depends space is big maybe yeah so that happens and then they all come back again, and you're like, okay. Someone fixed that. If you're an advanced enough civilization to deal with people going, you can deal with people coming back. Yeah, but you'd still be like.

It'd be annoying, I guess. You're like, this is less than ideal. Give everyone who came back the electric chair, sort it out again. Yeah. Just mass killings across the planet. We adjusted already. This is annoying.

Actually, speaking of crime and punishment, are there statute limitations in terms of what people did during the time of the click? Because Hawkeye committed war crimes, yeah? Yeah, Hawkeye should go to jail, absolutely.

He's a vigilante. He has done crimes. At least the Avengers are mildly government sanctioned in a way that doesn't really make sense, but they are. Hawkeye's just a dude. He did a lot of murders. There's a lot of people that are... The Civil War blokes are still wanted. Oh, yeah, that's true.

So Ant-Man jail. Again. Everyone back to prison. Get on this ship. If you're serving a five year sentence in prison and you get snapped back, you're like, hey, I'm out. Right? Gotcha, idiots. Or they're like, no. What if you died from the electric chair during the snap? Do you come back?

That sucks. That sucks. You're dying, get snapped, and then come back to just die again. It'd be more than lethal injection, actually. As you were being lethal injected, hopefully you got clicked away before it hit your veins. Otherwise, dang, I'm back. Hey, wait. It's not like in that five-year gap,

you're just waiting to come back so you can cut your arm off. And he's secondhand. He's like, okay, I'm good. No, I'm dying for other reasons. Because he just wouldn't know. He'd just come back. You'd have lethal injection through your veins in a field somewhere, I guess. It's good that you don't know because I was thinking that. On top of another guy who's also getting the lethal injection.

You come back. Yeah, first of all, kind of like, you know, it was put them, stack them on top of each other. They're dying soon. the guy who's also getting the lethal injection. You come back. There's a whole kind of like, you know, uh, had the, you know, the kind of like, you know, it was put them, stack them on top of each other. They're dying soon.

Yeah. It's weird. Cause he said somewhere safe. So I guess that means that he doesn't, that's just my, yeah, no, but you're probably right.

I mean like, but then I don't, who knows what if you just like, like there's a building there that wasn't there before. Now you're cut in half by a brick wall. Exactly. So it has to be a safe space. Yeah.

Otherwise it's basically like a moot thing he did because everyone will die anyway. Yeah. Or it's kind of thing like- But it can't be that safe because Spider-Man and the Guardians and that came back on Titan. Oh, yeah, that's true. I guess it is maybe where they-

That's no good. Don't come back where you were snapped because the world has moved. The planets moved. Yeah, I was world has moved. The planets moved. Yeah, I was about to say, the planets moved. So unless it was the exact same time and day, but like literally five years to the date and time, then there are just a lot of people popping into space. And dying in space.

Yeah, that is not good. And does it matter where your dust is But Again time The gems are basically just magic So we are forgetting magic So I guess the gems It's not like a genie's wish

Or a monkey paw situation So it's not going to be a cursed wish So you'll come back It's not bedazzled You're not coming back with a huge slong but unable to use it or whatever. Yeah, this isn't Bewitched the remake where Will Ferrell finds out

that his wife is actually a witch. Vision will have that realisation though. He knew and he's still dead. Yeah. Hulk again She created him. Hulk had so much power. He could just have in that second been like, oh so Vision's back. Whatever.

Again, they didn't do that because the implications. What's the implication? Because they were like- Tone is like, don't change anything for the last five years. Tone was like, just bring the dickheads back from the clique. Nothing more, nothing less. That seems crazy, Tony. Yeah.

That seems crazy. He's going through some stuff. I get it. He's like, I love my kid, but I miss my dead friends. But now I'm dead, so I guess it was... You know what? Who gives a shit what Tony Stark thinks? He dies.

Yeah, exactly. You shouldn't have listened to him. That's an interesting stance. I guess that you didn't know he was going to die, though. Also, just the idea of, don't listen to anyone that will die. What? Yeah, that's why I don't listen to nobody except me because I am immortal against

my own wishes. You are inevitable. I am inevitable. My death is improbable. The way people use the infinity gauntlet reminds me of the way every Green Lantern uses their Green Lantern ring. The Green Lantern ring is like make anything. They're like, what about a hand? I would just click

heaps and just be like, wish, wish, wish, wish. Yeah, he's got the chance. Why not be like, wish, wish, wish, wish, wish, wish, wish, fixed it. Why didn't he? Because he knew, okay. Just make the world bigger. More resources. I wish the world was 50% bigger.

Every planet. One, you don't need to say I wish. First of all. Hulk, sorry sorry Hulk wish world was bigger you don't have to say I wish Hulk try again and every time you make this click

the world is getting bigger Hulk Hulk want Hulk wish you made the world four times bigger Hulk want world bigger. Stop doing it! You've done it already! But Hulk no say wish this time.

Do I need to say wish? Hulk wish world was big. Hulk frustrated. Hulk hate friends. Click. And he makes a gargantuan planet with only Hulk on it. Only Hulk and his enemies, apparently. Hulk get to smash. Hulk love it. Hulk. How do you Hulk in his enemies, apparently? Hulk it to smash.

Hulk love this. It's funny to think that. I was just like, yeah, when he went to the farm, he could have just snapped the Avengers away there. I mean, it hurts him, but, like, who cares? Whatever. He doesn't mind getting hurt. Put the glove on the other hand.

It'll be a bit uncomfortable. At that point, Thanos doesn't care about the Avengers. I see why he can't put the glove on the other hand. Yeah. But at that point, Thanos doesn't care about the Avengers. I see why he can't put the glove on the other hand. Yeah. But at that point, Thanos doesn't care. He doesn't care about the Avengers. It's not personal for him. He's like, I did my mission of getting 50% at random

because his whole purpose is like 50% at random because he doesn't... He knows they're going to be a menace. At the end of Infinity War, he's like, I pray they remember you. If you assume Thanos is dumb as shit, then it makes sense. Thanos is just fucking stupid. He's like, I did it.

He's dumb. He's strong but dumb and good at getting gloves. That's Thanos. He's good at fashion. Look, we know he's not clever because his plan is very stupid. So I guess Thanos is just a big idiot, and that's why anything happens in Infinity War. Cool.

I mean, in Endgame. All right, good. Cool. So the consequence of the third click is a lot of problems of the world being like, we just had five. Good. Good. Overpopulation actually becomes a problem now

Yeah That you could do with a click Bring back the click Sort it out to be honest It goes from like An individual level that there's going to be a problem To a global level that there's going to be a problem To a universal level that there's going to be problems

This has caused so much Fucking problems And Thanos is a big dickhead he's a big dumb idiot sir's hulk yeah i still think rats are everyone's biggest issue right now that no one's thinking about hey hey have you thought about like um space rats oh yeah imagine alien rats whatever their equivalent is they're. Maybe that's what Ant-Man 3 will be about. Rats. Him just going rat by rat through the rat population.

Slitting rats' throats. Yeah, absolutely. Covered in rat viscera. I am Ant-Man. Someone needs to. And the last snap is kills Tony Stark, but also kills Thanos' army. Maybe that also includes Peter Quill's girlfriend.

Hard to say. No, she's there at the end. Gamora? Is she? Yeah. Oh, she's at the funeral. Yeah. No.

Oh, no, she's not. But are the other Guardians? Drax isn't. No. The Guardians are looking for her. Yeah. But then it's 2014 Gamora. At which point she was bad.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But she turned to good. Oh, yeah, that's right. And then Nebula which point she was bad. Yeah, but she turned to good. Oh, yeah, that's right. And then Nebula killed herself in the past. Yeah, shush. Which again is fine. I got that email. Shush. The Russos.

The Russ boys were like, shush. So he kills Thanos and Thanos' army. That's all he snapped, right? Yeah. Presumably. We don't know. We don't know what else Tony did. He had a lot of power in that

moment. He could have been like, I want to snap this. Also, I don't want this glove to kill me. That's true. If you can use the stones to destroy the stones, then you can use the stones to negate the stones. Surely. You could be like, destroy half the population and don't make it hurt.

I wish that half the population was gone. don't make it hurt. I wish that half the population was gone. And don't make it hurt. I also love that nobody tries. You know, they're like, oh, let's bring back Black Widow. And for some reason, Peter Quill's like, you just can't. I know you just can't. No, you don't.

Not Peter Quill. Hawkeye. You don't know. You don't know. You're just making a deception. Give it a go. Why not? You're there.

Look, Gamora's back. Yeah. Gamora's back. Yeah. Gamora's back from the plot. Yeah, that's true. Bring Black Widow back from the other future. It doesn't even matter. Just try. Go.

Maybe it won't work. That's fine. Go to the start of Endgame where Black Widow's like, I wish we'd solved it. Be like, hey, Black Widow, you did come with us. Yeah. Right. Good.

Done. But no. Everybody is stupid in this movie yeah yeah are there any real implicate I mean Thanos is dead Gamora Nebula maybe but probably not yeah Gamora I guess that's a

does it kill Loki again Loki's dead at that point except in the past or alternate hang on it says shut the fuck up plumbing boys Loki's dead at that point. Yeah, that's right. Except in the past or alternate. Yeah. Hang on. Shush. Oh, yeah.

It says shut the fuck up plumbing boys. It says I thought we had a deal vis-a-vis plumbing end game. But every time you try and plumb end game, we'll make another season of community that no one wants to see. Oh, no. Damn it. John McHale's stoked. Hey, Woodman.

What else is he doing? The Soup? He was in... He had a Netflix series? He was in Santa Clarita Diet, I think. Ah, the recently cancelled show. Yeah, good for you, Joel McHale, I guess. He was in Spider-Man 3.

2. Damn. He was a bank manager. Yeah. All right, Joel. You win this time. What is he meaning? I'm curious

So yeah, I guess the implication of that one is just the Avengers won Yeah, there's not really much more to it Again, everybody was dumb when they used the glove But it's less about the click and the implication Like, oh, now all the stones are there Then they get back

So, look, the world is full of darkness again. We've got no stones to protect us. Yeah. Let's hope that the Sorcerer Supreme was lying or misinformed or else that universe fucked. Hey, it's weird that, so, like, you know how at the beginning of this or near the mid, whatever, I said that it was a flourish of Thanos to make everyone get dusted? Yeah. that when tony stark dusted everyone he was like intentionally cop he was like

here's a moment of poetic justice that's very funny that's just not what i would be thinking about if i was getting rid of thanos he would just be gone well he would say like i'm maybe this is like he would have either subconsciously or consciously been like, I've seen it happen once before. I know that's how it works. That's how people get disappeared. Yes. That is insane. Why is everyone in the Avengers movies dumb?

You're not like, well, I saw it happen once with this all-powerful glove that can do anything. I guess the only way to disappear people is by making them dust. I'm going to click my fingers and be like, hell is real now. And then everyone's like, now I'm scared to die again. Return the fear of death to everyone. Hey, do you think when Thanos made everyone dust, he did it because he thought it was cool?

Like, was that why he chose dust? Was he like, it'll be badass, right? I don't know. What are we cool? Making them pop is way cooler. It just seems weird for a guy so practical to be like again you put maybe a lot of power onto a guy that you've claimed is a dumb shit yeah so like how he couldn't prevent or anyone can prevent that the the power of the gauntlet

causing damage maybe this is just something the stones do. That's weird. If you're killed by the stones, you turn to dust. That's a weird. In fact, no, it is. It's the power stone. Yeah. Because it's only the power stone that glows when he does the click, right? So the power stone specifically, if you're getting rid of, in this one instance, if you're getting rid of someone,

they'll become dust. What other weird rules does the power stone work on? Because, again, when anyone holds the power stone, they go to dust and they kind of, whatever. Wait, no, the power stone's in a lady and she's fine. Yeah. You're thinking of, um, wait, is it power stone?

No, no, what's the power stone? The aether goes in a lady. The aether goes in a lady. Yeah, but what stone's that? Reality. The reality stone. Ah, okay. Yeah, that's fine then. So the power stone, I get those two confused. When anyone holds the power stone, like, um, the collector's assistant. She goes ka-bloom-bloom. No, she gets dusted.

Why is that what the Power Stone does? No, I guess it's just part of the power. So it's not just the power. You're not giving a wish upon the Power Stone. Yeah. You're using the Power Stone to kind of amplify by the rest of the stones. Because you can also reality with reality, but you're combining all of them together throughout time.

Oh, no. You could have erased 50% of people. Hey, hey, hey, shush. Oh, no, that's season seven of Community. No! Also, Joel McHale's most recent role was in Ryan Hansen Solves Crimes on television, a show I didn't know existed,

but now I'm very excited to see it. It's not as good as you think. I've watched every episode. Sorry. And his most recent theatrical appearance was the Happy Time Murders. Yeah. John McHale's career is dead.

Come at me, McHale. Tweet me. Yeah. It's weird how not as powerful as they should be, the Stones are. Like, the reality Stone actually can't alter reality. It just makes like a pretty version. You know what I mean?

It's like an illusion. Yeah. That's not that powerful. Well, again, which can do that. It comes down to whoever's controlling it. Yeah.

Well then I guess we come back to Thanos is a big idiot. Yes. Thanos is a big idiot for not being like, all I need is the reality stone. What is Scarlet Witch? So Scarlet Witch can alter reality. We don't know. Yeah. Yeah. Cause they were exposed to the, the reality stone. So Scarlet Witch can alter reality. We don't know. Yeah.

Because they were exposed to the- The reality stone. Was the reality stone? No. It was the test. It was the sticky biz. Yeah. What stone?

The mind stone. Yeah. That's weird. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Hang on. Wait, is it?

Oh, now it's Joss Whedon's email. Shush. Oh, it's? Oh, now it's Joss Whedon's email. Shush. Oh, it's another man whose career is done. So good to hear from you. I haven't heard anything from you for years. Hey, Joss. How was JLA? Oh, bad.

That's a shame. That's a shame. Yeah. Look, Thanos is a big dumb idiot. Yeah. And the world is ruined. Yeah. Clicks, good or bad, are bad.

Yeah. And nobody for some reason knows how to use the Infinity Gauntlet properly. Except us. Yeah, except us. Click, click, do not let this hurt. Also, make the world big. Everyone's hard. More rats.

Sick. And then I've just showered in rats with a raging erection as the world grows exponentially in size. It's cool that I won. It's cool that we got this. The rats need world to play in. Make world bigger. What have you done, Jackson?

It's a rat world now. Like on water's rats. Earth is rats. Wow, you fall down into the rat pit your rats slowly from the feet up it's like being dusted but rat I love that

wait this sucks credits Jackson won't return and then at the end credits instead of getting that smithing sound of the Iron Man suit you just get the Jackson won't return. And then at the end, instead of getting that smithing sound of the Iron Man suit, you just get the rats. You just get several squeaks.

Jackson won't return, and then brackets, because he died from the rats. Man, this is a bad Avengers movie. Especially because it ends with the X-Men theme. Wow. I wasn't doing that intentionally, but hey a bad Avengers movie. Especially because it ends with the X-Men theme. Wow. I wasn't doing that intentionally. But hey, good on me. And on that note, I've been Joel.

I've been Jackson. I've also been Joel. Click for rats! Thanks for listening and if you want to follow us on Twitter you can find us at Sandspants Radio or you can find us individually I'm at Douche13 I'm at OldDogsOfDead

and I'm at GodDammitZammit If you want to hear our other shows you can head to SandspantsRadio.com and you'll find all our other content there There's heaps! And if you want to support us head to SandspantsPlus.com Thank you again for

listening and we'll see you again next time goodnight for now but not forever kisses