Plumbing the Death Star - What Happened to the Mushroom Kingdom?

Episode Date: May 1, 2016

In which our heroes delve into the world of Goombas, Princess Peaches and Koopa Troopers as we wonder what happened to the Mushroom Kingdom? We look at the concerning lack of humans left in the Mushroom Kingdom, work out if Mario is a knight or just a plumber and send Thor down to the Mario Universe. Jackson wants to know where the DK Jungle fits in, Zammit has some great Mario impressions and Duscher just wants to make a connection between the Mushroom Kingdom and the Land of Ooo. It’s a historical expedition for the ages as we find out what truely happened to Mario’s home town. Want to help protect the natural environment? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help make a difference in preserving the pristine Mushroom Kingdom. Hankering for some sweet geeky loot every month? Do us a favour and go to http://www.geekfuel.com/sanspants and sign up to receive your (possible) Princess Daisy today! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Hey everyone, welcome to this week's episode of Plumbing the Death Star, where we ask important questions like, what happened to the mushroom kingdom? I have a theory okay shoot it at me in a gun. All right Mush at me in a gun. What? Alright, so... What the fuck? Alright. Why are you so violent? Mushroom Kingdom's a violent place. Alright, Mushroom Kingdom. Yes. Probably not an entire planet.

Just a bit of a world. It's a kingdom. It's a kingdom. So this is the Mario Kingdom, yeah? Ah, yeah. Yes, yes. This is where everything in Mario takes place.

Alright. Yes. So we see like lots of castles and stuff like that. I would say that it's probably at the biggest country. Okay. So like we're talking like a France? It's a France. I would say that it's probably at the biggest country. Okay. So like we're talking like a France.

It's a France. A France. A France. It's a France. Good. François. François. Belle et Bon Papa.

Papa. Yes. François. Yeah. So it's a France. Yes, it's a France. I would say it's a France. And like there's a lot of like toads and fucking princess peaches and fucking plumbers.

Okay. Turtles. Turtles. Is it about Koopas? There's Koopas. There's some spiky ones. There's some not spiky ones. There's some Goombas.

Buzzy Beatles. Goombas. Bloody bloopers. Yeah. They're all like really. Boos. There's some Boos. There's some Hammer Bros.

Yeah. There's a lot of dudes. There's some Boomerang Bros. There's a Bowser. Uh-huh. There's some hammer bros There's a lot of dudes There's some boomerang bros There's a Bowser There's some Bowser juniors Anyway, fucking get to your theory 10 minutes later There's some bricks

There's some question marks There's some mushrooms There's a flower with a face It gives you fireballs It's a Mario Anyway anyway so i've been thinking there is a lot weak weird similarities between mushroom kingdom yeah and ooh the land of ooh as in adventure from adventure time yes i yeah immediately i see what you mean in that you have like just basic ass random objects that have been given faces and societies yeah i. I think in one of the later Mario games,

there are block men who like have just a block with legs and arms. Yep. That's a super, and plus princesses out the fucking wazoo. Yeah. Um, princess peach has princesses without dads. Yeah.

Dadless princess. Dadless, kingless princess. King and queenless princesses. Um, and like princess peach and princess bubblegum seem to have a similar thing going on. What? Just pink?

Pink. Princess peach is not a scientist. Like, And like Princess Peach and Princess Bubblegum Seem to have a similar thing going on What just pink? Pink Princess Peach is not a scientist She plays golf though And she's a fucking rat at tennis Yeah that's true Super good at tennis Well let's list the princesses in the Mushroom Kingdom Princess Peach

Peach Daisy Rosalina counts Paulina's not a princess She's just a random woman Rosalina's from space So really just Peach and Daisy Is Birdo a princess. She's just a random woman. Rosalina's from space. So really just Peach and Daisy.

Is Birdo a princess? She is to me. Yeah, she's my princess. My special gal. I think in Super Paper Mario. I like to stand on her eggs and throw them at her. One of the Goombas in one of the Paper Marios is a princess. I'm pretty sure. Plus, I think that there's the Bean Kingdom next door to the mushroom kingdom from, like, one of the Super Mario RPGs.

Mario and Luigi Superstar Saga. Yeah, that's the ticket. And there's a princess bean. Fuck, that game's so good. That game is fucking off its face. It's like a bean prince that flies around on a magic carpet. And the main bad guy is, like, a bean witch and has a little buddy who has, has like a propeller head who speaks in broken English yeah okay if you think like

so the Super Mario games are like oh okay sweet cool any of the Mario RPGs are just fucked like Paper Mario is just like oh yeah nah good yeah sick Super Paper Mario has like a little girl made of pixels who becomes a scary spider

it's a mess yeah good Thousand Year Door has fucking made of pixels who becomes a scary spider. It's a mess, that game. Yeah, good. Thousand Year Door has fucking... Aliens? Yeah, it's fucked. Everything's fucked. I don't know. Anyway, so is the Mushroom Kingdom in like living in the same...

Mushroom Kingdom taking place in the same time as say Adventure Time or is it kind of like... I think it's post post or pre so post I reckon like once society is developed properly because you don't get the impression from any of the Super Mario games that there was like a precursor civilization

yeah does that mean that by your theory like Mario and Luigi are the Italian sons of Finn the human or at least the Italian descendants yes because in Adventure Time there is a lot of like Finn the human. Probably the Italian descendant. Because in Adventure Time, there is a lot of Finn the last human, but then

he never is the last human. Yeah, there's other humans. And also, I mean, he's blonde, so he's going to have to hook up with someone who... An Italian. An Italian. We'll call it Fire Princess has fire hair. I guess if you're not a great star

Yeah but if you burn Finn's hair it might be black That's true Wait what colour is? It's brown It's not black No that's alright Fire Princess might have black hair when it's not on fire And blonde and black could result in brown hair

That means that at some point Finn has to find a whole mess Of other humans so that he can eventually give birth to italian plumbers yeah also though like i guess wario and the like don't look human really that's true well that's like if finn fucked a donut or some shit well within the realm of possibility what is like Where would Wario I feel Wario would descend from maybe Discarded needles And a donut Discarded needle like a person Discarded needle princess

Discarded needle princess And donut king This episode has been brought to you by Donut King Saising donuts in the world Shaken dog combo $5 This episode's been brought to you by Donut King. The best tasting donuts in the world. Shaken dog combo, $5. But I feel that is definitely something that could have come out of Wario. I think there's a lot of similarities there,

almost enough to make the connection. I think that there are some problems with it. Really? Where? Well, I guess that it's just like, even though they're pretty similar universes, the thing about the Mushroom Kingdom is that there is actually no other civilization around it, which I've always found really weird.

Like, you'd have the Bean Kingdom. But it's just like these... Hang on, let's count the humans. Rosalina, Peach, Daisy, Wario, Waluigi, Luigi, Mario End of list So seven human beings left Finn's inbred Children

Waluigi's probably inbred They all look very similar Yeah they do The princesses look very the same Yeah the princesses do Yeah and basically Luigi's just a Thin version of Fat Mario And basically Luigi's just a thin version of Fat Mario. Yeah.

Mario's just a fatter version of Mario. While Luigi's just a fucking real beanpole version of Luigi. Yeah. That's what I was saying. Also, you've got to remember, toads, their mushroom thing is a hat. Yeah, that's true. Which is something that you could definitely see in Adventure Time. Yeah, it's very true.

Like, you know, just these weird toad people going around like, ah, this is great, and they just take off their toad hat and they go like, oh, okay. Put that back on. Please put that back on. That's great. Saving princesses seems to be a rite of passage in both of them. Yeah, that's true. And if you were raised by a fin, or at least

he was your grandpappy. Could it be like 100, 200 years later? Yeah yeah that's true and if you were raised by a finn or at least he was your grandpappy yeah could it be like a hundred two hundred years later yeah that's true oh then even 200 years later you'd have like um your descendant your very famous descendant sort of save princesses yeah save princesses that's like a rite of passage that's when people aren't just like mario's not just like i'm a plumber why would i it's like of course i have to save princesses yeah also wario has a car but he's the only person with a car and if we're living in like a post-apocalyptic situation where nobody else would make like knows how to make cars anymore and wario's the only one who's like yes i'm gonna drive around on all of the empty roads he's pretty wario's pretty much living in mad Yes Wario has a car and a motorbike I reckon Wario if he drives up to the Mushroom Kingdom

He's like, you fuckers ever seen an automobile? Is Wario a mechanic? Because it's a bad profession In a post-apocalyptic world Where there's plumbers, mechanics Wario's alternate Super Smash Bros. outfit Is basically a mechanic outfit That means nothing

Think about it. In 200 years time, after the adventure time... Wait, WarioWare. There's humans in that. There are. There's a city in that. Descendants. It's just a mob. Even like plumbers, right?

That might not mean what we think a plumber is. Well, in Mario and Luigi's Superstar Saga, you get sent to the castle basement to fix the plumbing and all you do is hammer and corks. Which is also, again... I think maybe a plumber could be another word for a hero. I guess not. That would be awesome if there was some weird

like fucking evolution of language where plumber came to me. Well, see, the reason I posed this question... Yes, the reason you posed this question... Well, the reason, because I thought of it before we started the episode. You did. You fox. Yeah. Is that in the very first Mario

game, right? I mean, the very first one. Donkey Kong. Yeah. Right? It's a skyscraper. Okay. That Mario has to save his pretty human and normal wife or girlfriend, Pauline, from a big ape. So, what happened in between Donkey Kong and Super Mario 1 that transformed the world from a city to a fairytale kingdom?

Is it like Mario lived in the city, and then he was like, Mario's going to go out to the country. Going to go to like a... What's that song? Country life is the place for me. and then he was like Mario's gonna go out to the country gonna go to like a country life this is the place for me green acres is the place for me that's the ticket green acres what happened well it could be just that

like the same city you're seeing Wario where which admittedly makes this theory not fit as well because that's a there's like a like a proper city bustling metropolis. There's a dog that drives a cab. There's more cars.

It's fucked. It's all fucked. A dog is a good thing. Is this something of Jake? Yeah. I guess a magic dog driving a car kind of makes a certain amount of sense. Because again, I don't think we...

In our world, dogs don't drive cars. Correct. So, you know. Actually, the metropolis sort of makes sense because Mushroom Kingdom could just be sort of like, kind of just like... Out in the sticks, out in the boonies. Where, well, even just like...

Even like fucking Europe and America. Like, you know, you go to like New York and then you head out to like the countryside of Germany or like the more, you know, you might end up with some... So it's the land of... Not a feudal society. Is the Mushroom Kingdom feudal? Is Mario a knight?

No, he's a plumber. He's a plumber. I like that it's like Mario, Luigi, plumbers. Wario, mechanic. Waluigi, tennis player. Veo. Well, he made his debut in Mario Tennis when Wario needed a partner

So I guess Professional tennis player Yes Athlete That actually does feel like Something Warrior would do It's like Okay so Warrior

Everybody we're coming together We're forming a really good Tennis tournament Is that your Warrior voice? No this is my Mario Warrior being like I've got a good friend Yes

I bring him along My good friend Pete Sampras This is 90s tennis reference This is only I bring him along my good friend Pete Sampras this is only a friendly game of tennis what are you doing? we've been friends for years

there we go we've been friends for years he's a professional we grew up together he was at my wedding Mario I was at your wedding I didn't see him and then why are you just uppercuts Mario in the face laughing I guess I guess you can play that's a rat Mario does what he likes um but yeah I guess if you just assume that out in the

boonies you have the mushroom kingdom and then you have like Wario City or whatever I was like if you have um even if you look at like all the Mario carts, like all the places that take place, you know, all the different stadiums. The tracks. The tracks. Because Wario has a fucking stadium. Yeah, Wario.

Wario probably lives in the city where everything else is sort of a bit out to the country. And then you've got like. You know, Moo Moo Farm is definitely like, you know, this sort of callback. The interim between like Wario City, Moo Moo Farm, and then you have the Mushroom Kingdom. Well, that's a good point, actually.

With Mushroom Kingdom, like it could just be like one of those fucking like... Rainbow Bridge. Drop off to space for a bit. Have a bit of a rainbow road. Yeah, why not? Yeah.

What were you going to say about the Mushroom Kingdom? Yeah, it feels like sort of just like, yeah, like... Oh, Jesus Christ. The fucking Mario Brothers, they just like discover Asgard and like, oh jesus christ the fucking mario brothers they just like discover asgard

this is a secret bridge this is racing odin being like thor you have disrespected the kingdom so i am sending you down he's like to earth? no to mario earth fucking gets like smacked instead of by a van

by a little go-kart what is this hell like he has a hammer then fucking Mario pulls out his magic hammer boom boom boom boom sends Thor flying that's the dream turns him into a star

it's a nightmare yes anyways what about the DK jungle the dream. It turns him into a star. It's fucked. It's a nightmare. Yes, anyways. What about the DK jungle? Is that just like another part of the planet? Yeah. I mean, we're recording at your house at the moment, which is in the fucking sticks. Yeah. Where if you go to Zamet's house, it's a bit more suburban and my house is in fucking Desperate Housewives

land. It's true. So yeah. Wisteria Lane, that's where I live. Yeah, Wario... Wario... DK? Mario? Mario? That makes sense.

Does that mean that at some point, DK just went into the city and kidnapped all of them? I think so. Someone kidnapped DK and he just had to freak out. That's the first thing he saw. Well, gorillas aren't meant to be in the city. That's true.

So maybe he just got lost and got scared. So, okay. So I reckon maybe then what's happened is that we've gone to Wario's city. Yeah. Like DK has just gone in there and all the flashing lights just freaked him out. Freaked him out. He had a panic attack. All of the other Kongs have language

except DK. DK is, from the evidence we have, just an actual egg. He's seeing all these bright lights because I'm imagining Wario Land is very much like Las Vegas. Yeah, it seems like it. Whatever the Wario Land stays in the Wario Land.

I'll give you a hint though. It's all anal. All anal on stolen jewels. Yeah, though. It all ain't all. All in the Lord of the Stolen Jewels. Yeah, that's warrior land for you. So I'm guessing, you know, an ape seeing all these flashing lights, he's going to have a bit of a panic attack. He's going to freak out. He's going to be a spook tape.

He's going to be a spook tape, you know, running down the fucking main, like, strip of warrior land, grabbing the first person who just happens to be, you know, Pauline, like, you know pauline like you know mario's first i think she's a reporter from memory and also like that skyscraper is not finished which is why there's heaps of barrels and fire and shit it's being built see so does that mean mario coming down from the mushroom kingdom like i'm gonna take a pauline and a good day yeah attacked by a gorilla rough that's why they're not together that's why they're not

together because you can't get over that yeah that well that's a that's a first date or at least a date where you with the band together like nothing will ever separate you or you go your separate ways every time mario nearly caught pauline or got her back dk's like not and goes higher level yeah as a as a gorilla like a spooked gorilla is wont to do. Does Mario kill DK in the beginning? At the end, I mean? Oh, is it a different DK? Oh, yeah, actually, that's true. That DK is Cranky Kong, DK's papa.

DK is actually Donkey Kong Jr. Who, when Mario traps Cranky Kong in the game, DK Jr., you have to fight Mario. How does that take place? That's a weird thing for Mario to do. Mario's age... I guess apes... No, apes age about the same as humans, don't they?

Yeah. I think so. Maybe their life is a bit shorter. Tweet us at Sam's Friends Radio. If you know ape lifespans, keep us in the loop. How do apes work? So basically, Mario's reaction of being like that ape that that spooked ape stole my girlfriend i'm gonna steal that spooked tape there's a weird

little thought process is that what happened like all right pauline's left him yeah he's like all right that ape is to blame he's blamed that i'm gonna i'm gonna take that out i'm gonna fucking i'm gonna go where that fucking i think the weirdest thing about that is that that means like in all the Mario parties and Mario Smash Brothers Mario Brawl um that that

ape who then fought Mario to save his grandpa is like yeah I'll just hang out with Mario whatever bygones be bygones or I think he's kind of liking you know Smash Brothers like

you'll slap Mario in the face I'm gonna smack you into the ground with that fucking DK move yeah you gotta remember that Smash Brothers doesn't actually take place in the Mario universe. Yeah, that's true. It takes place in the Toy Story

universe. Yeah, yes. So, where have we found ourselves? So, what happened to Mushroom Kingdom? Probably a massive nuclear explosion similar to the Land of Ooo because it is in the Land of Ooo.

Plus there is also magic within the mario universe playstation magic whenever kamak the the magic cooper or magic cooper uses its wand it's like the playstation symbols

it's like a triangle circle square cross i don't know why but yeah so magic does exist that's true it exists in fucking adventure time yeah exactly um

because yeah like you think about all the bricks are people all the bricks are citizens yeah that's Mario gets points for murdering them yeah

50 points a brick props you know he steals their lunch money that's nice it's difficult to reconcile all of the different Mario games

because you have Mario right which is taking place in like this feudal society yeah then you have Wario games that are either taking place in the city or in the desert where he's fighting pirates unless it's the same desert that fucking wherever daisy lived and she lived in a desert when like a toad got her some shit i have no idea. Sure. Yes. Oh, there's Cam...

Something Desert. Cameracart. It's a track in Mario Kart. Yeah, that's the western one, yeah? Yeah, there's two. Because there's one with the train in Mario Kart 64. And the boos are just like the dead. Coming back and roaming Earth.

In their little scary boo mansions. In their scary boo mansions. Because, you know, what has killed these people To cause them to come around Luigi's mansion Is also like a suburb thing Because Luigi wins a house next door To a haunted mansion

No he wins a haunted mansion If he won one next door to a haunted mansion He'd just be like I'm not going in there All these guys are like come on Come inside Fuck that I'm trying to think of mario um mario kart tracks that are like hard to reckon so there's an airport yeah in super mario kart wii u there's a fucking airport that's all right to fly to the other parts of ooh but no okay get a space or

whatever oh wait but it's an actual like the airplanes are actual era it's not like fucking the other parts of... Oh, okay. Get a space or whatever. Oh, wait, but it's an actual... The aeroplanes are actual aeroplanes. It's not like fucking... It's like transcontinental flight. It's like a... Yeah. Oh, my fucking God. Unless they've developed time travel.

Maybe. In Luigi and Mario Partners in Time. They literally go back in time. So it's possible. Fuck me. It's not the only possibility. Has Mario gone back in time? Yes. To what? To when he was a baby. No, the babies

came forward in time. Mario meets himself. Okay. As a baby? Actually, hang on. Your whole bloody inbred children theory no longer works. Because it wasn't my theory. You pointed at the wrong Joel. That's alright. I think it was my theory

I didn't even say it was yours Because in one of the Yoshi games The more modern one Mario, Luigi, Wario DK and Peach All arrive from stalks From who knows where And the Yoshis carry them

So these motherfucking stalks Go on places stealing babies. I guess. God damn it. So inbred children still works. Yeah. Or are they like... I'm taking it.

It's my theory now. I think it's my theory. Okay. Or the storks are like social workers, right? Okay. And so they go to places where clearly their parents are having children, which they're unfit for. So then they take them and then they drop them off to places

where they can look after them like a humble Yoshi. Yoshi should not be in charge of children. Yoshis don't talk or have houses. They just make that wirt, wirt noise. Wirt, wirt. Wirt, wirt. Wirt, wirt. That's the one.

You can do Yoshis. I can do Peach from Mario Kart 64. Let's go! He's a me-o-ario. Let's go! And once again, our Mario episode has descended into noises. I haven't done a Goron noise

for a while. Anyway, that's a story for another day. Because Legend of Zardo also No, no, that's a story for another day. Because Legend of Zelda also... No, no, that's silly. Is Peach in charge? Or is she just like one of them... Is it Peach like our queen now?

Where everyone's like, well, yeah, she's the queen, but like... Is she really? What does she do? She's on our coins, but that's it. Because Peach doesn't ever seem to make any decrees. Where are the parents? What parents? Exactly.

No, but Peach is an adult. Mario is also an adult. What parents? Dead. So why is she a princess and not a queen? There's a graveyard out the back. Oh. It's like, ooh, what royalty works.

Maybe the dad's in a coma. The king's in a coma and until he dies... Then Mario's got to go over there and give him a quick kiss. Yeah. And wake him up. Exactly. I like to think Peach is just waiting around for her dad to die so she can finally become queen. Have real power maybe what kind of power are they

why are they like but no but the princess thing makes sense as well because like princess bubblegum and you know princess seems to be like a different title it doesn't necessarily mean you're like the ruler of a kingdom it seems to be like a but then princess bubblegum is the ruler of a kingdom Yeah but like fucking Trash princess isn't or like Princess princess isn't Who's the big strong princess Princess strong There's fetus princess and that's scary

There's fetus princess Fetus this but a breakfast princess Rules the breakfast kingdom There's a lot of princesses going on So it seems weird that we would just detract princess away well fucking if it's ooh maybe that's why there's no king because there's no princess is a different title and also not just that but princess is has been taken over as the top echelon yeah yeah yeah serviced to be a ruler you have to be a a princess princess there's cooper he has kill himself Bowser King Bowser King Bowser

Yeah Interesting Ice King Yeah Ice King King Bowser There you go King Bowser And what does he want to do

He just wants to capture So he's like Both of them just want to fuck princesses And that's alright I mean Do they I think just Ice King just wants to capture princesses

As a leftover hang up Because he called his wife a princess Bowser What the fuck does he want to do? He wants to run Washington. He's like a dog chasing cars. He doesn't know what he's going to get. He doesn't know what he does when he gets them. He's just like, I got her.

Bowser Jr. thinks that Peach is his mom. Bowser and Peach probably fucked a bit. You'd have to assume. One would assume. I would assume. I don't like to assume that. She is dainty. He would have a monster dong. He would have a gross turtledick. That'd have to assume. One would assume. I would assume. I don't like to assume that. She is dainty. He would have a monster dong. He would have a gross turtledick. That'd have been gentle. It would have been a loving affair.

Turtledicks are like corkscrews. You gotta remember that Mario and Peach aren't together. They're even worse than corkscrews. They're like this weird plantation looking thing. It's not a pleasant time. It's gross. But Mario and Peach don't live together. Are they even like not a fish head can? No, I think they're just mates. Mates that have a kiss every now and then. That's alright.

That is alright, actually. That's fine. That's fine. Kissing mates. It's the dream, really. It's actually not even like a big deal, really, when Bowser steals Peach to bang. It's probably just all a fine time.

What's Toad? Where does he fit into the royal? He's like a servant. They're like a servant race. Because he's always like, you gotta get bloody Princess Peach. I assume Toads are a servant race. That makes sense. Maybe constructed genetically, just because they all look identical.

Probably the same with the Yoshis, really. I was going to say, is there like a Princess Bubblegum experiment going a bit of a wry? Could be. Definitely makes sense. It would make sense. They do live in little societies though the toads yeah just and what is toadette yeah because she has toad pig tails and looks like none of the other toads gargamel's experiment pulled a fucking gargamel on the toad he's like i want to eat him best way to eat them is to make a woman one. Bowser probably created Toadette thinking that toads tasted like super mushrooms, which make him big, and he thought it was like,

I'll turn into Mega Bowser, but then... Maybe one time. No, just a hat. Like Mario's getting tiny. He's just like, I feel like Toad looks at Toad. What if? What if? Actually, no, Toad. What if? What? Yeah. Oh, actually,

no, Toadettes are like naturally occurring. Where's another Toadette? There's a bunch in the RPGs. Okay. Which is probably what we should be basing

the universe off. But I've played them so it's fine. Yeah, same. What about in like the Land of Uu Adventure Time? Yes.

Is there anything that can alter your... Well, then again, Jake, he can alter his size. Yeah, plenty of things can alter their size. So again, that could be... Marceline can transform. That can be like a whole... Like a leftover? A leftover thing with the mushrooms.

That's a possibility. Makes sense. Fireflowers also... Like, if Jake... If Jake... Actually, no, fuck it. If Finn or Jake ate a flower and then shot fireballs, I would not be surprised.

That's true. Plus, you have a whole fire kingdom. Yeah. And there's a fire fucking place in Mario. Plus, gang, if you separate the Mario Kart tracks, you can separate them into different categories. You get the hot ones. Yeah.

You get the cold ones. Yeah. You get the grassy, nice ones. Then you get the city ones. The city ones. Which kind of covers all of your bases in terms of kingdoms. King-dongs. We talk good in this podcast.

It's really funny to imagine Bowser being like, I'm going to make these little toads. Like, I'm going to eat them and get... Oh, it's a hat. It's a fucking hat. I imagine he's the first one he makes. It just comes out looking like a little dickhead I imagine he's the first one he makes. He just comes out looking like a little dickhead and he's like, did I do it wrong?

Plop a hat on. He just chucks him in and makes the one and same thing. He's like, this is weird. Ghost was captured toad. What's going on? He's like, what do you mean? I just look, it's like, I'm making, he's like, what's wrong with that?

What do you mean? Look at you, look at this. He's like, oh. Imagine Mario in like the fucking Peach's castle just wandering around. And he's like looking for the bathroom and he just opens it and it's just full of toad hats. And he's like, a peach? What's this about? Peach's like, nothing.

You shouldn't have looked. I just like your mosh Of Mario wearing a toad hat Or the toads being like That's really not on That would be very good If he You know how he wears That cat costume

Yeah The same thing If he ate a toad He just becomes A little toad Mario He becomes like Mushroom Like giant big

With like a mushroom hat That would be good That would be kind of cool Toad has no knees That's good Why doesn't he have knees I don't know That's not good

How does he sit down He stands Oh he does I How does he sit down? Oh, he does. I've seen him sit down. It's gross. His legs are all straight. They just kind of slide up as though they're on like a weird... I don't even know what you call it. Like a divot of some kind.

What if Donkey Kong ate a mushroom? I don't know what would happen. Donkey Kong tends to keep to bananas. He ate a mushroom and got big. In Donkey Kong 64, he can go into a barrel and come out of a rhino. Does he come out of a rhino? Is he a rhino?

He rides a rhino. Not in Donkey Kong 64 he just becomes a rhino. That's alright. What's a rhino's name? It has a name. Rampy. Yeah.

Does the rhino does he turn into the rhino and you control the rhino then he turns back? Yeah. After a time limit or are you just controlling that rhino? No, he becomes the Rhino, does he turn into the Rhino And you control the Rhino then he turns back After a time limit or are you just controlling That Rhino No, he becomes the Rhino Donkey Kong 64 is it's own prop Where did the Kremlings come from

Where did they go What's a Banjo Kazooie I figured the Kremlins were kind of like the same thing A Kremlin What are they called Kremling I think they're very similar to a Bowser of like the same thing. A Kremlin. What are they called? Kremling. Kremling. I think they're very similar to a Bowser.

Yeah, probably an offshoot of the Koopas. They disappear. I think Donkey Kong sorts them out because the ones in the Wii U version and the Wii version are like little tiki heads. So like Donkey Kong 64, they probably just sorted it with the Kremlin. They're like a pirate race.

Yeah. Does that make the DKs a better hero than Mari? No, he's better at genocide. I think that's a plumbing for another time. We haven't really thought of anything that directly contradicts the fact that they take place in the same universe. No. It could still be you.

I'm happy to believe it. Good. Fuck you. I think it's maybe like the technological advances, but then again, it's like, after X many years, I mean, you rediscover airports. Also, and if time is, hey. If time is cyclical.

And also maybe like the Land of Ur, the story we're seeing from Adventure Time is just legends being told by Mario and his descendants now. Yeah. Because time, it's just sands in the wind. And on that note, I've been Joel. I've been Jackson.

I've also been Joel. Time is sands in the wind. And these are the days of our lives. And if you have theories on the Mushroom Kingdom and OOF, send them in. ChocoMailWay.

SandsPantsRadio at gmail.com or tweet. If you have any things that directly contradict everything I just said, tweet. Keep them to yourself. You shut your mouth. Don't you run your mouth.

No, I do. Yell them into your phone. We can't hear you, but you might feel better. Kiss your mates. Kiss your mates. If you think this show is worth at least a dollar, why not donate to our Patreon account? Follow the links on our website, sandspantsradio.com.