Plumbing the Death Star - What If Batman Was Man-Bat? (Revisited)

Episode Date: July 13, 2025

an all timer episode if you love terrible impressions... Happy 600!Buy Tickets to see Plumbing The Death Star & Thumb Cramps herehttps://cheerfulearful.podlifeevents.com/Links to everything at https://linktr.ee/plumbingthedeathstar including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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If you're gonna wait two months also Anyway plumbing the death star cheerful earful podcast festival thumb cramps cheerfully a full podcast festival superdoll studios Friday 3rd of October be there Hey everyone and welcome to episode 600 You should know this by now, but I'm Jill I'm Jackson I'm also Joe and you should also know this. The Plumbing the Deaths, there is a comedy pop culture podcast

that asks the important questions. Now, to celebrate episode 600, we're going back in time, back to the future to re-ask questions that we were unsatisfied with our original answers for. 600 episodes. That's a lot of episodes. 600. That's 600 exactly Well 599. This is 600. And in that time you don't nail every question Exactly. You know it's bound to be some time. Yeah. Most of them.

There's three of us so I'm thinking maybe we just we just stretch episode 600, you know to three weeks. Oh yeah, okay It's episode 600, three weeks. Let's all get one. Okay, everybody gets to pick. We all get one. Episode 600 month minus one. Yeah, exactly. Well, for my episode I want to revisit, what if Batman was manned back? Okay. Do you remember this one?

No. Why do you not like it? Well, so we did this one. Okay. Uh, for one, I cannot remember or conceive of the riffs we came up with for this episode. Okay. or conceive of the riffs we came up with for this episode, okay? But secondly, for some reason, either we did it during COVID, so it was over, like through Zoom, or it was something wrong with the mics, but the audio's bad. Oh, no.

Now, remember the audio's shit on that episode. Okay, so this might help. I've put up the episode description to the 31st of January, 2022. Okay. Uh-huh. What would happen if Batman was being bad? Mm-huh. What would happen if Batman was being bad? The description just said who knew Gotham's biggest export was $1,600 milkshakes So, yeah, I put it to you what would happen okay if Batman was man bad

Oh yeah, I put it to you. What would happen if Batman was Man-Bat? Now obviously Batman is Gotham's Dark Knight, and Man-Bat is a sort of man-bat. Man-Bat is a creature of the night that is more monster than man and kind of terrifying. A man took a serum possibly designed to stop diabetes, and he became the Man-Bat. Isn't Man-Bat's thing... Oh no, I'm thinking of the demon bat thing. Yeah Yeah, yeah, man bad was yes. Um, I think it's like the animated series Maybe is like episode two or one depending on what they wanted to air first And they were just like yeah, yeah like excited just injects. Yeah Medicine medicine he wants to cure. He's trying to save himself. He's got something something a bat doesn't have.

Like yeah, a lot of bad man's villains kind of share the same kind of vibe as spider-man villains. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's got a lot of you know lizard energy. Yeah, it's all big time big time. Okay, so yeah, the reason that he inject himself with a serum is way stupider than diabetes. The reason that he inject himself with a serum is way stupider than diabetes. Okay. He wanted to give humans a bat's acute sonar sense. Oh, that's what a noble god thought. Of course. He's like, the FDA won't approve any funding to test this on mice, so instead I'm going

to inject him to myself. Herk Langström. Was that you Langström? A zoologist who specializes lies is good named L Langstrom Langstrom Yes, that is good And it's a good one for Batman to say well He's fighting him to try and you know remind him of his humanity Langstrom Langstrom Langstrom you're in there I know you're in there

Maybe not Maybe you're just like a man bat. Specializes in bats, develops an extract intended to give humans a bat's acute sonar sense. Smart noble goal. The formula on himself, the extract works but has a horrible side effect. It transforms him into a munch. It works though! Hey it works! That's so funny.

Like, oh time to take my pills to help me with my uh, sonar. What's the side effect? Oh, it might become a man bat. I don't know if the FDA will approve that. This is an awesome bat. I'm just gonna finish reading the paragraph cause this guy rocks. It transforms him into the monstrous human slash bat hybrid creature.

The side effect makes him so distraught that it temporarily affects his sanity He goes on a mad rampage until Batman finds a way to reverse the effects Later Langstrom makes a concoction again So the same thing happens a second time I did it again this being a man Wife a man bad Worse is his wife. Yeah Honey, you know I'm a man bad at a friend seen Langstrom You know how friends seen you know how being a man bad is great. We've done nothing but wonders for our relationship What if you were a woman woman bad? Well, you're not gonna believe what happens

Yeah, what coerces her into drinking the serum and she goes through the same drink It's a suit you drink it. You'd inject it for some reason honey Her into drinking the serum and she goes through this Terrorize Gotham City until Batman once again restore them to normal First time like okay that was a Circumstance like a noble girl, you know curing diabetes. What are you doing? Oh, you just want to have so like bats have what what you know what? Hey, who am I to spit in the face of science? I guess we know help the blind Maybe yeah, sure. Okay, let's let's maybe you're doing that for a noble reason You know what? That's wonderful, but there was unfortunately side effects. I like you become a man bad. That's a problem I guess that's something else you didn't maybe investigate but that's's fine And then you know he sits in for a couple months. Yeah

You know what what if I you know what I was happy here and then I was man bad man Is that did you at least like like like what's happened? I thought you cured yourself. Did the cure not work We're not I wanted to go around So I'm wondering if it was good this time Yeah did you alter the serum in any way shape or form? No I just didn't take it right the first time I drank it this time Yeah the first time I injected like a doofus

This time I drank it Should have drunk it Anyway and then third time And then seeing man batten and shiba and being like Langström are you kidding me? Are you for your what? Man, here's what happens after that. Yeah I mean at one point Langstrom takes a serum and retains enough sanity to work for the forces of good

Your scientists you sit in the you tool in a way you're trying to cure diabetes Maybe you want to make more people like, you know, so. I don't know where this diabetes is coming from. This is what everyone's trying to do. It's a noble cause. A noble cause of giving us the hearing of back. So he's like, no, no, no, no, I'm back focused. And he looks over, he sees like, you know, little serum.

Do not drink man-backed serum. But I'm so thirsty! Oh, my bottle of water is in the other room. Little serum. Do not drink. Man that serum. But I'm so thirsty! Oh, my bottle of water is in the other room. But it was over there and from my memory it tasted real good though. What if I diluted a little with water? Yeah, exactly. Maybe it'll be good this time. I don't know.

If I made a serum that turned me into a bat monster that was so horrible every time it happened, I went insane. And also became a bat monster that was so horrible every time it happened I went insane and also became a bat and became a monstrous batman I would just throw it away. Pour it down the sink. I would simply say well that was a mistake. I'd give it to someone as a prank. Nice, nice. I'd try and get like a noble prize somehow.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, bat monsters. So Kirk and Francine, obviously Kirk keeps drinking the serum Anyway, they have two kids Becky and Aaron. Oh, yeah, but because of the effects the serum because of the effects of the calm basically this okay, so serum fucked up my Yes, but not in the way bad Aaron's DNA is Serum fucked up my mom. Yes, and the way

Aaron's DNA is fucked up. Yeah born with a deadly illness But then is the deadly illness him not being man bad enough Francine simply just turns him into a young man They got one fucking solution for every problem. Look, that's so funny. If you're a hammer, every problem is a nail. If you have a manbat serum, every problem is solved by manbat juice. Like fucking, like a kid's so sick

and your wife's like, I don't want to be the one to save. But do you reckon, maybe, if we gave him the man-bat serum? He'd be better. I reckon certainly be a man-bat. Well, you see the diseases of a man are not the same as What? Makes a bat We made him a man-bat. It'll be fine. Um, but don't bats have rabies and they can transfer that to humans as well. Who can say? Scientists you are a bad scientist. Oh, I'm an echo locations

I'm an ear doctor Batman's stupidest villain very possibly. Well, I guess he cured his kid of not being man bad enough I don't know. I don't know if that counts Well, I guess he cured his kid of not being man bad I don't know. I don't know if that counts. That's like if I like literally going through his fictional biography It seems like that much like the when you're a hammer ever problem is a nail. Uh Yeah, so often it's just like man. Are these things happen? Yeah, I shouldn't be man bad or I should be man But are the only two roots Yeah And if you don't drink this serum the next time you become man better be permanent What it's like? No you do

Talia al Ghul Takes the serum off being bad. No you had enough Stop it turn stop it. Yeah turns people into man back Like um, we're taking away your crap like you know your addiction No, no, no, give me that! Stop! We've had enough! I need to make an army of man bats. So how do you reckon they stopped that? By somehow taking the man bats.

Oh, so man bats, like, the only thing that can kill a man bat is another animal. Oh, the man bat. Oh, can I have a guess here? He takes the man bat serum. Yeah, correct. That's how he solves every problem. He can become man bat because he knows that he'll be the leader of these man bats And they will like they follow me because he's man bat prime is that is that what's going on?

I don't know why it doesn't say okay Like what other option does he have I guess yeah, you know stop all these men It's like well the only thing I can really do is also be a man bad So I guess I could click it I'll give that a crack okay, and then at one point he Batman's dead Yeah, yeah And then Kirk is he's tormented by dreams of becoming the man bad and accidentally killing Francine's he's like oh god without Batman. I might become man bad again and kill my wife. Fuck them!

It's a very simple solution, just don't drink that serum. Now, Francine then goes missing. Oh no! She gets kidnapped. Where'd she go? Kirk's like, oh god, it's time for me to become man bad. How could I, a simple man, find my wife With enhanced sense of

Kill my wife my wife's missing I better become How long was she missing? First kid kidnapped France and then man bats like I'm back to normal and the phosphorus is like you've had so much syrup you do need syrup Serum into a syrup. I just, it was nice and sweet. I don't know. I have this delicious stack of pancakes and all I have is this man bat syrup.

What other option do I have? Dr. Phosphorus is like, you got beat up and now you're back in human form because you don't need the serum to become man bat anymore. Yes. And then it turns out that Dr. Phosphorus has kidnapped Francine He's the reason that she's missing which then causes Kirk to turn back into me

And also as an aside for us, you know when you're like, you know, well she Bad the sex is oh, yeah, but still do that's to be eating pussy. Yeah, so, you know there is that Makes you think. I know being a man bat makes me into some sort of monster like you know the creature the terror is Gotham but babe you know you got to admit man bat eats like. My tongue game is crazy when I'm man bat. You know how much you love. I Don't know what I'm doing when I get down there is yeah Tired and confused But you gotta admit you gotta admit the man that knows how to eat you out a pussy I don't know. I don't know. I don't know fun. Isn't it sounds more more more like an excuse for Kirk to become man bad

for Kirk to become man bad. I guess I've got to. Babe, you know what's good, I'm just doing a little sip. I'm doing a sip. Maybe my face will work this time. And then shout the window off. So terrorized Gotham. I'm gonna kill my man! Wife just, motherfucker.

I hate man bad dude. Okay, so I found out where the diabetes thing came from for you Yeah, it's not I mean this will make like a sense Logical step from what we know from his original biography, but cuz yeah in the new 52 They've rebooted it and they did man bat again Oh nice Why you know you got it with the classics. In this this time, your

introduction to man bat is the fact that there's a serum that's on the loose and gets dumped over Gotham. Yeah, I'm the one. But the serum turned into an airborne virus, which turns everyone into men bats. Oh, yeah.

Men bats. Oh, no. Turn into minbets. But then Langstrom pops up later, Batmobin's like, hey, I found the creator of the serum. And he's like, it was never meant to turn people into men bats. Well, yeah, dude. It was meant to help deaf people.

OK. OK, not diabetes at all. Not diabetes at all. But it did it. Taking responsibility as the creator of the serum, he uses a sample of the serum Batman has obtained to inject himself. Why? How's that taking responsibility? Hey, I fucked up. I'm gonna become the man bat.

Oh, this creates an antivirus which also spreads through the air. Langstrom is turned into a man bat, the last remaining man man bad as his antivirus cures the remaining It was later revealed that Emperor penguin was the one who released the virus Later made use of the man bat ceremony combined it with the venom drug. Oh sure and one of poison armies plan concoctions Very it would suck being one of the men bits and being like was really good My wife so good at it and he's been taken away now. I'm now it's that way I get down there I'm just kissing good Man that really helped damn dude in between both holes

You don't want to go anywhere near the sort of action zone. What? Just hang out with the Goofers. Plutaurus? What? I don't know what that is. Unless I'm man bad. Then I know what that is. Man man knows exactly what to do.

Yeah, OK, so what if Batman? What if Batman? Clearly, it's, you know, I'd thought, yeah, it's an addiction, I guess, because it is clearly very tasty. Well, how do we combine? He does become addicted to it at some point as well. He was addicted from the fucking beginning. We know!

I just didn't like, it's like, oh no, I'm addicted to the man bat syrup. I think he's just looking for an excuse. I think that's what is that realization. Yeah, we know, dude. He keeps waking up every day and he's like, I don't remember being man bad last night. Yeah, but into anything fucked up I call you come man the only way to figure this one out Yeah, if I'm man bad, I don't remember what I did a very vague psychology class I took one says like when you're in an altered state of mind or being whatever it's called

It's easier to remember Yeah, if I returned to that old like if you put down 20 bucks when you're pissed peace blind drunk Yeah, and then you can't find your 20 bucks easiest way to find 20 bucks is to get absolutely blasted I have to say the floor with your argument is that when you become the man bad again You're probably gonna do more terrorizing. I will simply just remember Well Yeah Well Cycle wakes up the next morning. What did I do? Honey you have a problem. Yeah, yeah funny intervention When you become the man bad you hurt well, well you like

Yeah, you've hurt me on an emotional level, but also you are a mood He's like I'm so worried about that. Yeah, what I should do But I personally don't have the strength and resolve to stop taking the man back But you know who does have the strength of the resolve Me from taking the man back You just clung into the roof clam climbing around He's got a real problem well, how do we combine, I guess Bruce. Well, let's combine Bruce's origin Yeah, yeah with man bats instead of Dedicating his huh? Okay

Pretty hard time. Yeah often is where addiction is bred from sure Yeah, you don't have to change too much because like he wants to become like cuz bats terrorize him as a youth Yeah, what a PTSD there? Mm-hmm And then he's like well I want to become Batman and I want to be able to like be more like a bat to terrorize him as a youth. A lot of PTSD there. And then he's like, well, I want to become Batman and I want to be able to be more like a bat to terrorize the criminal to Gotham. Oh, I hear on the grapevine that there's a lovely scientist

who's made something to give me some good echolocation. That will help me be a bat. Yeah. Is Batman still scared of bats? I wonder that sometimes. Nah. Like when he sees a bat, he's still like, shit I guess he uses his own. Yeah. But like his whole bat cave is full of bad. He's constantly shooting himself. He's like, I need to go use the bat computer and he just stands at

the like stairs down. Alfred frightened a fat. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared.

I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared.

I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so scared a couple minutes master process. I've explained to you This is probably gonna keep happening Alfred I'm so scared to look in the mirror because in the way I am about right

Master I get it master Bruce said the plan was you become the thing you feel. Yeah. So you make Gotham's criminals feel smart move. Sure. But the downside is you are scared too. Also another thing I just thought of is not everyone is afraid of bats master Bruce. That's like a you thing.

Pretty rare phobia. Yeah. I'm actually don't really am you see I'm not scared. Yeah Most people are scared of actually spider Becoming Logo there could be a ladder. What do we think? I think I'm ladder man Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! You'll be heights man! What happened to you Alfred? Have you inhaled a joker gas? Ringo? Alfred! What happened Alfred? What's wrong?

They hit him with Ringo gas. Did Joker get Ringo gas you're gonna tell me Need help Fuck me Bruce Before it's too late! Coo coo ca-choo! I am the walrus! I am the walrus! You don't want to get hit with Beatles gas. Or Ringo gas.

The joke is evil is trick, Ringo gas. Yeah dude. He Ringo gas-style food. Well yeah, so he could also because I've got to become more bat-like and so as opposed to becoming what's more bat-like than a ninja? A bat.

To become more like, well, yeah. But do you think that Bruce Wayne, taking that serum, because we know the serum turns you into a man bat. Yes. Bruce Wayne is the most brilliant man who ever existed, he's a genius. Do you think he'll perfect it,

because the goal is not to be a man bat. Well, I think what would happen is like, you know He's a genius. You might like the man. He might go on like a little rampage. Mm-hmm that and then be like, okay Yeah, bad move. I see what's happened, but I see the benefits then I was terrorizing Yeah got them, but I need to tone that down a little bit and terrorize the criminals of the trick is you want? He still needs his public-facing persona as Bruce Wayne. He can't do that as a man. So I guess if he has more, so he could perfect it so he's got more control over it.

So that at night he injects it and maybe it lasts like 12 hours or you don't want that. You don't want to be flying it. Bruce Wayne millionaire fell out of a plane. Fell out of an invisible jet? Maybe one of those were in the room? Like Bruce Wayne Heights man just works a funny outcome there is Heights man Striking fear to the heart of heart of first floor we do ground floor crime Scared of the second story. Yeah, I've been to a bank that's high up You're about to be

It's got like stilts that make him just like rocket High up doesn't feel very good. Yeah,, yeah, I'm more scared of heights I'm fine with. Sorry height, man, I'm actually scared of spiders. Well, thanks for apologizing. Yeah, sorry buddy. Are you scared of bats? No. Do you know anyone who is?

No, it's a weird argument. Yeah, I think Bruce Wayne I read in the papers once, but honestly, it's a very rare phobia Yeah, it's really cool being up high height man. This is nice. You can see so much Oh the river! He just straight drops you AHH! Hi man why are we having a conversation? Oh if you're not scared of heights you will now

Scared of dying? Yeah Well I guess but are we all? Yeah I think that I would figure out that Bruce Wayne was Batman pretty quickly just in the sense that Batman didn't rough up Bruce Wayne Yeah, that's what? Cuz you could you did he what okay Bruce Wayne you're living in Gotham Yeah, and you're like Bruce Batman is beating up these criminals, but he's not going for this sack of shit

It's Bruce Wayne done. He's not really a criminal isn't the idea that Bruce Wayne like he doesn't seem like a bad guy He just seems like he's negligent. It's like a party boy. Yeah, isn't it? It's like punching a party boy Yeah, be like height man. Why would you do? Precious billionaire, I think you meant to like look at him and be like wow he squandered his family's fortune He's living in like, you know the goth. Yeah. Yeah, he's living in Gotham Castle or whatever and it's all falling apart Is there a real guy that Bruce Wayne's simulator? I'm trying to think not really like as in like a real-life millionaire that like There's a lot of well, there's a few billionaires out there. Yeah, but like okay. Well, what about this?

Like is the creator of Facebook? Zuckerberg, oh, no, sorry myspace. Yes creator of mySpace. He sold MySpace and now he just goes and surfs and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you think if like someone killed him, people would be happy? Yeah, cause like- Okay, fair enough. At that point, like at one point in time, it's like, well yeah, he's not in control of Wayne tech or whatever. Yeah. Wayne cool? Wayne industries? Wayne industries? It's not Bruce cool. No, it's Wayne- Wayne tech? Wayne tech or whatever yeah Wayne cool what Wayne industry?

Not Bruce cool. No, it's Wayne Wayne Wayne Maybe Wayne cool Wayne Bruce ink Batman Sad he didn't name it like Bruce something. Yeah, absolutely. It rolls off your tongue. Yeah, yeah. Bruce Incorporated. I'm working for Bruce Tech. Bruce Pty Ltd. Bruce Corp. Yeah, I guess. It's Wayne Enterprises. Oh yeah, we're stupid. Yeah, we're dumb. Dom Guys. Dom Enterprises. What about you? Bruce Enterprises. Um, he's like, he doesn't own Bruce Enterprises now does he?

No, he's on the board though. He has the majority share, doesn't own Bruce Enterprises now does he? No he's on the board though. He has the majority share doesn't he? When he starts, well it depends really I guess. I mean in the Nolan trilogy he does. At the start he doesn't doesn't he? Or is he getting his ass, or is he basically like not really there? Well yeah, cause I think again, the persona he wants to portray is like

it couldn't be him because he doesn't even care about his legacy. He's just a guy who goes and you know he was just a piece on boats He owns Wayne Enterprises, but the head of the board is Lucius Fox. Yeah, yeah, yeah, so he's uh yeah Yeah, what about it's not right at someone else then it eventually becomes Yes, yeah, yeah could not tie that about if the in crime alley One alley when Joe chill shot Instead of shooting his parents. I guess he shoots the parents too and then he shoots the boy with well a man bat gun Okay, I was gonna say if at that moment in time that little Bruce Wayne he becomes a man bat well Joe chill is freaking out Shooting that weird bat monster. It just happens. That's when it happened

Okay, so like he shoots the parents and then like, you know, he's like, well, I know witnesses and he shoots the kid, but it hits him in just the right moment. It hits him in the... Where it becomes, activates his man bat gene. Yeah, he hits the exact spot on a human being's body that bursts the bat gland.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. His body is flooded with bat pheromones and he becomes the, well, at that point, the boy bat, I gland. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. His body is flooded with bat pheromones and he becomes the, well at that point, the boy bat, I suppose. Yeah. Now, would Alfred still look after the boy bat? Well, does boy bat turn back into like, I guess boy, boy?

Or is he still, is he a boy bat all the time? Well, maybe the gland, the pheromones work like the serum where eventually after 12 hours it relaxes. Oh, you know, like a, is it a werewolf situation like or visit a night situation where it's like it's the full moon Every Become boy boy becomes boy bad. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah by that point Yeah, I guess yeah, I would would look after him and then you know I guess it would be a couple of months before you might figure out that Wait a second that boy back that has been terrorizing Gotham is my boy boy

Boy boy is this true? Master Elphred! I don't know Master Elphred! I always told you Master Bruce but that's mine! Master Elphred every full moon I hide I don't know what's happening I get weird dreams But I love it! I have an idea that I really like doing Yeah come on for the Elphred

I'm gonna make a serum And I'm gonna drink that serum We're not gonna come to Batboy He's picked up Elphred's accent I guess it makes sense Yeah, yeah, he kinda like Master Bruce I'm very happy to hear that

I'm happy that you're happy considering your parents are dead Your parents are dead You got a blogging guy, Mrs. Doubtfire Your parents are dead He got hit by Mrs. Doubtfire gas Hello Hello Your parents are dead and it's horrible! He got hit by Mrs. Downfire Gas Hello! Hello!

Hello! Mrs. Downfire Gas! Choke on you psychopath! All of Gotham Hello! Hello Batman! Where are me children? I'm the nanny! You're not! You're the man! Me tits are on fire!

Hello! Jack in the original episode had that roof in it? I'm trying to figure out how he gets a $1600 milkshake. Well, telling I remembered about the original episode that is worth revisiting. Why do you reckon we're going to touch on what would happen if we swapped them? Well, who can say if we ever will? But I think in that episode we also did the opposite. Ah And Bat was Batman How we did that I couldn't say

As if Langstrom became Batman or if a bat took a serum and became a man I know what I prefer to explore if a bat took a serum and became a man When I prefer to explore if a bat is yeah became a man Friends like around him being like dude you gotta stop keep becoming a man It feels like a bad addiction man. Yeah, I know you love it if a bat became a man like Bats don't know what the fuck is going Mean like they know what what's going on for a bat. Yeah, but if a bat became a man I mean we know that it can't fly. I think that's just a dead man If you shot Jackson with a dog gas, yeah

But if you said okay you shoot Jackson with dog gas yeah, and then he goes off to play with other dogs Yeah, what are you thinking? I'm not thinking anything gas. Yeah, and then he goes off to play with other dogs. Yeah What are you thinking? I'm not thinking anything good. Well, is he What kind of dog yeah all good questions, yeah, give me any dog All right. I was thinking for some reason I'm always like golden retriever. Yeah, I've become a golden retriever Yeah, just becomes regular dog. Can't I ever have I retained my sentience? We don't know. Let me like we just shoot you with dog gas And then hard to tell yeah, yeah Yeah, you can't talk you're not doing anything to indicate anything that a dog wouldn't do okay

Yeah, then you just turn around and then you cross the road Well, I was already doing Jackson Don't get hit by a boss Immediately then there's a dog park across the road and he's chasing all the dogs around. Jack, bark once if you're still you, twice if you're not. He's gone, he's gone. He's chasing it. He's howling and growling. Is that really not a useful ending?

Is he answering or is he having fun? Yeah, and I'd be watching that and being like Does he know what he's doing? Cause that upsets me if he does If I shot you with a dog gas and then you immediately just tried to do dog stuff I'd be like, you're a guy, stop doing that But then what if he turns back and he's like I don't know what happened

What was that dude? I'm missing a lot of time Is it got anything to do with the gas? You shot me with it I don't know, let's find out. Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Cognizant mm-hmm another something else the problem is we said me becoming a dog Yeah, you know my sapiens yeah has been reduced to a dog sapien yeah, but a bat becoming a man He that's that's getting thoughts that it never have had before correct again same shooting a dog with a man gun Yeah, exactly that dog doesn't it knows what it's a kill this dog, but I actually learned it with a man bullet damn dog doesn't it knows kill this dog but actually learned it with a man bullet damn dude I got stuff doing that his back just like oh no oh my god I call him to be in alive fuckhead

I wanted to kill you I was trying to shoot a bat with a gun oh now I've made you a man I wouldn't even speak yeah it would just start screeching but because it's got like vocal cords it might make a sound that ooooh what would that- It shreds its throat and it throws up blood and it dies. Wow. Tries to flee. I shouldn't have done that. Okay cause bats can't run.

That's true. So well it would try- We've given it legs. It would try and move like a bat does which would include like if it putting his hands down which are like a bats wings and then kind of crawl It's kind of fucking awful to watch I Has gone to What if when Langstrom took when sorry Bruce Wayne takes or Langstrom takes the serum. He becomes Bruce Wayne as a boy

This is sounding familiar We did I think maybe Makes him Bruce Wayne Wayne but as a boy? Yeah, he takes a serum and then he becomes Bruce Wayne as a little boy just after his parents have been shot. Well, I was going to say, what happens to a Bruce Wayne without a Joe Geel to kill their parents? Well, he grows up rich and spoiled.

And becomes a prick, no doubt. No doubt that boy's a prick. You think Richie Rich is growing up normal style? Richie Rich is the up normal in the world Change the name of his comic yeah, we're You hate this boy yeah Do you think that maybe this is something we talked about in the original? Yeah, but what do you do with that serum you've developed a suit

Do you give it to your wife like so like this serum that makes me a rich? There was serum that makes anyone who takes it a rich little boy. Yeah. Yeah rich little boy. You're rich Yeah, you don't become rich get money in the bank account. You were rich little boy You think you are a little boy who just thinks he's rich. Yeah. And that my parents might be just have been shocked. Well, the trick is like there's no... Okay.

The problem with the serum though is because immediately you want to use this as like a hey, take a walk a mile in someone else's shoes. But because they don't remember, there's no lessons to be learned. The joke is just hit someone like to hit your douche with the John Wayne Cancer from filming a movie. I'm a piece of shit I Tell you what of all the accents we've done today, that's by far the worst By far the least accurate Yeah, I think mrs. Daphne Always fun to do yeah, I guess what I would how I would market that telling you into a little boy

Yeah, we'll be I guess working with people who have slightly like you have trauma Yeah, like less trauma because then it kind of is the idea of like yeah I just said that is John Wayne Thinking about John Wayne I was gonna be tempted to use it to teach people You don't remember shit, but it's good while it happens, right? Well, actually well, yeah, cuz he has some yes dreams of becoming man bad So there is like a lingering effect there. Yeah, he doesn't remember being me. I remember something. Yeah I keep having dreams of a little boy. I'm gonna kill my wife

Where's that coming from I need to go to a doctor My wife's been kidnapped Wow time to turn into a little rich boy. So yeah You do yep the royal you okay and the royal accomplice. Yeah Go into a casino. Uh-huh. Yeah. I'm there walk through you're both of age They let me in they let you in they let the accomplice in you both go to the bathroom You shoot the accomplice with the Bruce Wayne gun. Okay, okay. You got a little boy in the casino. Yeah pickpocket height Okay, you use a little boy Pickpocket people at the casino. Yeah, I kick out a little boy

They're not gonna check the little boys pockets and they're gonna go who's this little boy and he'll be like my parents are dead Yeah, my parents just die. Yeah quick questions one was Bruce Wayne at that point a good pickpocketer to he's currently grieving his parents Just being shot. Yeah, he's now in a casino You're holding Gone No You're holding a gun No, it's a scam little boy. We don't know go pickpockets. What's happening your parents will be fine. I just need 10 diamonds Well your parents didn't die as well, okay, you just think they did yeah get out Wayne's parents are dead is your not Bruce Wayne if is Bruce Wayne real Yeah, what do you mean is Bruce like in this scenario when we could become baby Bruce Wayne?

Yeah, no, I mean happening in the back is exactly like if Happening in the code in the barbarian When Kirk Langstrom develops the baby Bruce Wayne gun. Yeah. Okay. It's as it does. Batman exists at the time. So you could shoot Batman with the gun and make him relive his trauma. Yes. Funny. Because you don't know that that is Batman. And that's also funny. You shoot him with the gun. He says, how do you know? You go, how do you know what? Well, no, you shoot him with the gun. He's like, I'm Bruce Wayne and my parents are dying. And then he reverts back to Batman and he's like, I have no memory of this. What just happened?

Because maybe Bruce Wayne that you shoot with the Bruce Wayne gun doesn't know that he grows up to be a Batman. He becomes less... All you're doing is that the audience that knows this goes, huh, that's it. But it's the perfect way to kill Batman. Well it's the perfect way... Because a child is weaker than Yeah, you shoot him or you push him off the top of a building yeah

Yeah, but Batman's ready for it, baby Bruce Wayne isn't no yeah, and then when he dies he reverts back to Batman Yeah, you go. I killed Batman you shoot You're taking him up to the height you kick him off. Yeah, like how how ironic that height man is killed by Another death by height I like that the swapping the man bat serum into Bruce Wayne serum only started because you were like hey Here's a bit. I remember from the podcast. I think I don't think it Panned out like that in the original episode. Yeah say honestly so back to so we haven't even really touched on the Wayne yeah became man back. Mm-hmm would that be well? That's way scarier Yeah, I reckon that this is probably the in fact, I'm fairly certain. This is the course we went down originally

Yeah, when he cut through all of the silly nonsense aside Yeah, by having Bruce Wayne become Batman like that's a guy in a suit scary, but you're like, that's a man Yeah, when it becomes man bad if you're like fucking two-faced trying to flip a coin and then all of a sudden the screeching Yeah, choose your arm man bats don't have morals. Yeah, you know what I mean? I think a man bat would honestly scare the gimmicks out of With man bad or Bruce becoming man bad, yeah, is he going after just like like Gotham? What does he still have his sense of like I want to I want to fight criminals That's a great question

Well, if that transcends into man bat then I think you got a more effective Batman is if Batman's like I don't kill Manbat will like I don't have such a you know, I yeah I don't have this moral proclivity. I hate the joke. Yeah. Yeah, I'm gonna eat the Joker's face. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, I'm gonna suck his blood. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I guess also He probably would have like man that would have probably got rid of some of the Robins. Yeah, Jason Todd was stealing The hubcaps. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So like I guess if he was man bad at the time, that's like an aunt little boy Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I love this version of Batman Who is man bat and still has a car?

He's gonna drive some you gotta drive I like the idea of Jason Todd being like I'm gonna steal the wheels off the car of the person that is a bat Well, you are fearless he is a monster yeah, but he's a cool car I guess he wouldn't develop a lot of those little gadgets. He wouldn't need him need to yeah, you can flap his wings and absolutely No cape. Okay, we imagining that this version of Batman or Bruce Wayne He he like is it like Kirk Langstrom or he doesn't remember what happened Is he like the most effective way to fight crime? Yeah is to turn myself into a monster Yeah, I'm loose on the citizens of Gotham?

Every morning he wakes up, oh Alfred, oh what I did Hand me the paper and it says, thousands dead in another Batman massacre Was that me? Did I do that? Alfred, please tell me there's another man Alfred, Alfred, they were all bad guys right? Master Wayne, it was sort of a gala for charity Master Wayne, who's he? It was like an evil gala, yeah

For an evil charity For the evil charity, right? For giving children cancer, right? Well that would be a charity master way Well if you think that the cure for children's cancer is evil master way Well I wish you had told me that What was the cure? Was the cure also maybe killing other children? No they were raising money for not anymore

Well they actually had the cure master way Oh they were raising money money and money is the root of all evil. They're celebrating the cure master way, but you broke it and you drank it in front of everyone and then killed the scientist. You made it. It sort of seems like it went beyond your typical sort of, you know, kind of mad animal rage. You felt very direct. And then you flew to the Neodran's Cheers Hospital and you shit on the roof. Yeah, dunno what that's about.

Did I say anything boring yet? No, you just got squished at the moon. Squished at the moon, yeah. Like an animal, so, bad luck next time. Is there any footage of it? Do I look cool? No! You're sort of squatting over the top of the hospital

If you look here you can see your cake in children's blood! No, good luck! They're calling for your death! But that's alright Master Wayne, never give up! Never give up, you've just just gotta keep stiff up a lip. Take him down to the Batcave and there's just nothing in it. It's just a cave that he can just screech around in. Hang upside down and just pond his little bat thoughts.

Al for being like, is this? At what point do I need to pull out of this? Hello, the government. I used to work for you, yeah? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's so tragic that Alfred is trying to explain that he knows who the man bad is. It just so happens he got hit with the Austin Powers gas at the same time. That's so sad.

Please don't call this number again, sir. No! That's not very shagadelic! This does not make me horny, baby! No! A Batman in the background just tearing apart a child I tried baby yeah I think I lost my mojo I think I lost my mojo but yeah

at one point there's a yeah alpha pennyworth say hey nothing good's coming from this night 3 yeah cause the first night you go I raised the little boy he's got a good hand on his shoulders it's just a curse it's a curse is easy every full moon he turns into a little werewolf all right change things I can't okay don't worry when I have the serum in me, I'm in control. And then he goes out there and...

You've killed a lot of people. How in control are you, Master Bruce? I'm still figuring it out. I'm calibrating, Alfred. When I say in control, I mean it's just got my natural sense of justice. Right? I don't think that's true. Children are born with original sin. Oh, right? I did not raise you Catholic!

Who? Is that a boy? That's what the baptism cures, I'm pretty sure! Baptism, you say? Pretty sure! Who baptised you? Who baptised you? God baptised you!

Oh no, Boy Boy's gone insane! I think having his parents killed really changed how that boy... No Joke as a joke. He's not gas me gas Gas hanging out with me That's the same pun! That's the same basic pun! Enjoy being Catholic, Badman! No! Fucking Catholic! You without sin can't claim the first stardom, whatever! Ha ha! He doesn't, he's a gas man, he doesn't have to be Catholic. That's what the gas is for.

That is what the gas is for. The gas man, he's not half on his own supply. No, well that's a real risk for gas man. You know, absolutely. I think Batman's better off staying as Batman and not man bad. It doesn't appear that anything good comes from being a man bad.

Cause he's not in control. That's really the key element there. You're not in control. And I feel I feel that that's something we maybe didn't discover I'm not sure last night Batman has a lot of ego Yeah, and maybe I also don't feel that Bruce has enough ego. Maybe the first night my natural justice Yes, like it'll override the man. He didn't know

Hmm, maybe lock me in a cage for a bit. Yeah. Alfred, you may have to kill me with some kind of bat killing going. Yeah. Or like I'll figure it out. Lock me in the cage. Rat poison? Rat poison? That kill a bat?

I'm sure. A bat's just a flying rat. Yeah, that's so true. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, yeah. More people are scared of rats than bats, I would say. Yeah. But I think if I came face to face with a bat,

I'd be more scared of a bat than a rat. Rat? wait depends. What's happening? Give me the scenario of each okay? The bat you're in a cave, okay? Oh, no, maybe better you've gone to get something out of a shed Oh, and you open the doors dark inside the thing you needs up the back say it's a shovel Yep, you go you're moving stuff to get out of the way you pick up the shovel yeah And by doing so you disturb a clutch of bats and they go Yeah, give it one give me one just give it one one bad one bad flies Yeah, that's why you're facing the whole shit, and then yep, and then the alternative same exact situation

But when you pick up the shovel, it's a rat. There's a rat on it. I'm most good the bat I'm most scared of the rat not depends on where on the shovel the rat's a rat on it. I'm more scared of the bat. I'm more scared of the rat. Nah, that will fly. Depends on where on the shovel the rat is. No, but also rats are... Bats will avoid you, a rat's not necessarily... Not necessarily. A rat is a gamble, yeah. Bat will give me, depending where I am, maybe rabies.

Mmm, true, true, true. Rats love to run up clothing. Yeah, I know, but a rat can fly. A rat can go inside your pants and bite your balls. Yeah, a rat could go inside your arsehole. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and then out your balls. Yeah, right could go inside your asshole. Yeah. Yeah, and then out your man Yeah, I look see for me. I'm like a bat. I'm scared. It'll fly at me. I'm freaking out I don't know what's gonna happen with a rat. I grabbed the trouble in front of hit it

Oh, I see you don't try and hit the bat. No, I'm scared cuz flying is flappy. Yeah, I don't expect a flappy bat I've been face to face with both and that's definitely what back the bat shit on his dick Okay, you don't know this story yeah, like well again you wouldn't I guess you know wasn't it was it attacking you yeah No, it wasn't like face. Yeah. Yeah I think that's also like because there's sometimes in areas where there's bats. Yeah Like like like the flying office kind of bat or like a small kind of bat So I'm thinking like the classic like you know the the like I don't know if we do we have those kind of bad Yeah, well because I was thinking like you know those flying foxes that we have they can be they're huge

I'm thinking like little tiny like that's attitude is usually like oh fuck a guy Yeah, yeah Panicking and that makes me pan a ride whereas a rat will have like intent to murder me So I want to murder it first. Yeah, I've the only time I've ever come face to face with a bat I couldn't get it out of my house. Yeah, it was hiding behind a painting. I was trying to get it out with a broom Yeah, yeah, it wouldn't go behind the painting just went But what do you mean went behind? Where the little bat painting is hooked on the little hook? Yeah, that was behind there, and I was poking it with a broom

Yeah, it was a little bat was very cute. I actually think bats are pretty adorable I think the little ones with the the wretched faces and sort of more cute than the flying foxes Yeah, cuz a flying fox. I guess just a fox You can get that face. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah flying fox to me kind of looks basically like, you know a dog with wings You can get a dog dogs everywhere That lost dog. Yeah, that was mine. Yeah You found it sick Looking for that. No you you know what you you have it when the moment it's out of my hands. It's out of my yeah

Yeah, yeah, I'm going to the pound and claiming that every lost dog is yours Yeah, exactly give them to you go to the bow to say all of these dogs I lost them from my house Yeah, oh my god. Thank God you found oh my god. Thank God you're here Okay, that's great. Just get chuck them in the car Don't worry about boxes or whatever Shovel them in about 15 dogs I have a big House I got a big house

I didn't give him any names that sound like real names Grogs, Skunk, Becks Dada, Fep Yeah Blaf, Runk Yeah, yeah, yeah, good dogs now All good names for dogs I mean, far be it for me to call you a liar, sir, but they don't seem to be reacting to those names

Yeah, Farby, how fucking dare you call me a liar Yeah, they're shy Yeah, yeah They haven't seen me in a long time. Yeah, okay, just a little bit disobedient now. What did you do to them? Yeah, what have you been calling him? Mm-hmm Rover? That's not his name. That's blessed Blast blast So the tax is rovo that's what we did make. Yeah, the tag that you put on it. Come here blasts. No, that's not I'm gonna call this phone number. It's on this tag. Yeah. Yeah, dude Yeah Why are you waiting till now ring that number is a really shit whether that's my dog or not and it is

Crazy, that's insane. Why did you not rig it there? What the hell? I don't think you should get a dog that has a collar. I don't think that... Is that how a pound works? Yeah! I don't think you work here! Give me those dogs! Oh fuck!

This scenario became strange. Became a strange situation. Just imagine that like all the buildings, like all the walls, like sort of fall down like they're made from like plywood Was actually Joel's dog thievery I steal dogs I don't have a second step I went to a pound and said all the dogs were mine Use that same trick on I didn't know what to do. So I just started my own band. And I got a bunch of, you know, I don't know how to flip a dog. Okay. Yeah. I don't know what dogs are valuable. Wiley coyote. $500 in the hole. Did a bunch of painting. I did that. He made like sets that made it look like a pound.

Yeah. I'm embarrassed. I really need that $500. What do you do with the dog? Rent's coming up. I can't pay rent with his embarrassed. I really need that $500. Yeah, we do with the dog that's coming up I can't pay rent with his dog. I tried. How do you know what how much Jobs don't get money. Yeah, I found out the hard way and also they need to be trained Yeah, and you know, you got a feeder dog 15 dogs. Yeah Don't forage that well, that's crazy to me. They're also Yeah, you don't want these dogs I don't know why Dogs don't forage that well. That's crazy to me. They're also hungry. Yeah, that's sick. You sure you don't want these dogs? I don't know why he stopped you from having them.

Yeah, you can take them off my hands. Please. You know, I was having Grog or whatever. Yeah, Grog loves you dude. Fep, that's your problem dude. Fep, now idiot. No refunds. No refunds.

He runs away. Yeah. Anyway, Batman Became Man-Bat Gotham, worst place. I'll say it. I'm not even scared to say it. I think you're right because you know- Everyone's fearing like Manbat, but not just criminals. No, just everyone. You're not gonna get Goodsburg like, oh no, the bat. You're gonna get like children. Oh no, the bat! Oh my god, the bat! It'll just be like, hey everyone, citywide curfew. The moment it gets dark stay inside till we shoot and kill the man bad

I guess um you could like make a good killing with like you installing bars on people So you're imagining Bruce Wayne. Oh, no no I'm I'm like an opportunist. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and I'm like Gotham my god my beautiful town that I love Yeah, Gotham is being terrorized by some sort of monstrous creature. Yeah, and like sure we've got the curfew happening But it still smashes through It seems to only target hospital the week It seems to only target hospitals. The weak and the unwelcome. Targeting the weak and the unwelcome firm.

So yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe I just start a contracting business where we install like iron bars to protect sick children. In fact, maybe I'll do something that's a pretty noble idea. Until he charges out the nose for it. That's the thing.

Maybe we'll just do it at cost or a little bit more So I Google some some I'll hundred ten dollars per bar. Yeah smart nice I love my joker in this universe because like you can't you know He can't pull the like where are two sides of the same coin man bat you love that man bat and I love gas Two sides of the same coin man bat Bat and gas. Joker's no joker, he's gas man in this universe.

As man bat screeches and tries to bite his face. It's a tale as old as time, man bat. The bat and the gas. REE REE REE REE Exactly. We're both wearing masks. Mine's a gas mask to protect me from my gas.

Well you're not. And yours is a bat mask. Oh. Are you just a beast? I'm a man who made a gas that makes you sound like Ringo Star. And yours I'm kind of who made a gasp that makes you sound like Ringo Starr I thought you were a man

Kind of like a Sasquatch Yeah, like almost like a literary This is like talking to a dog right now you You guys I need to leave I should go see Bane. He loves gas. Do you think if you gasped Manbat with the same Mrs. Doubtfire gas, he would get affected by it?

Ah ha! Yeah, I think he would screech the hell out of you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm glad that Gasman can affect him. Yeah, like a Manbat thinks way well, but I'm glad gas man can affect. Yeah, I think like yeah like a man bat thinks It's mrs. Doubtfire. Yeah, there's a lot of layers It's a man who's become a bat who thinks that he's a man impersonating a nanny Yeah, to get close to his children. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, worse thing could be to hit a man bat with a Bruce Wayne

Whoa a man who with a Bruce Wayne yeah dude whoa a man who did a man's trauma has become a man bad yeah and then it turns back into him as a little boy experiencing the trauma yeah he won't know any of it but us as the reader will be like this comic sucks comic books no more And then it's a shot of us walking away from a comic book in the bin. Yeah, we're like, huh, I guess comic books were never good. Yeah. That's an important lesson for everyone

to take away from today. Absolutely, dude. Comic books, they were never good. And Jackson, how are you feeling about revisiting your favorite episode of all time? I think, well, I think it's just an episode that need, I wouldn't say it's my favorite episode of all time. If it was his favorite, it wouldn't be needed to be revisited. Exactly. Sorry, your my favorite episode of all time If it was his favorite it wouldn't be needed to be your second favorite episode of all time

I take least favorite episode to perfect Look I don't remember what we said in the first one. I think we did visit revisit some riffs Yep, but I think this is for the listeners to decide. It's for the listeners out there. It's for the listeners to decide it's for the listeners out there It's for the listeners this episode's for the listeners dude They can go back and they can listen to the original version of this yeah, and they can compare and contrast Yeah, they can say what happened to my good dear friends plumbing the death star Yeah, they can either be like yeah, I honestly didn't think the first time was that bad Yeah, this one is a fine like he needs improvement., they could be like no that look the first one terrible. Yeah, one also terrible. They should stop answering this question Yeah, because in another 600 episodes. I know exactly where I'm going

I like that. Yeah, this one is for the listeners because most of the time when we do podcasts that just for you Jack Yeah, yeah, that is true. You know the podcast content you love to consume is us Yeah, yeah, but this one's for the listeners. You're gonna listen to this one. Maybe I might watch it on youtube.com Whoa forward slash forward slash plummy that stuff. Well, probably forward slash just jubarish. Yeah We don't know the episode. We don't know the link. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. That's true People know people can find it for God's sake show notes Yeah, exactly. Yeah Well should be well happy episode 600 everyone go out into the street and shake a stranger's hand and say

Happy birthday plumbing the death still I've been Jackson and I've also been Joel and we'll see you next week for another episode 600 600 don't stop coming in a don't stop coming Hit the ground running six on your finger and a thumb in her butthole You know the song?