Plumbing the Death Star - What Would Be The Worst Thing To “Honey, I shrunk The…”?

Episode Date: September 14, 2025

They get to the question eventually, but first the boys are in an aggressive competition to prove how little they know about the purpose of human blood.Links to everything at https://linktr.ee/plumbingthedeathstar including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey, everyone, and welcome to this week's episode of Plumbing the Death Star. I'm Joe. I'm Jackson. I'm also, Joe. If the energy seems a little off to start today's show, it's because Jackson just pitched, what if we changed the name of Plumming the Death Star to, what the hell, my wiener? I think that there would be no difference. You know, sometimes, you know, a worry for us, obviously, we're Plumming the Death Star, and one day Disney will come for us, okay? Such a thing is an inevitability.

Do you think Big Wiener might come for us if we changed our name? I think that's a safe pivot. After 600 episodes we're rebranding. What the hell? What the hell, my we know. It's also worth noting that there's a comma after what, a hell. Yeah.

What the hell? My we know. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And with like a question mark or like an explanation mark as well. What's that thing that. Interrobang? No offense.

Interimbing. No offense to have ferns that nerds love to talk about. Yeah, the interrobang. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because it's got bang in the title. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm using all the wrong words day. I think you should just added a full stop.

Yeah. What the hell? My weeno. What the hell full stop, my weeno. Yeah. What the hell? My weno. Anyway, if any of these

are appealing to you, the dear listener for our eventual inevitable Relayrand. Plumbing the Death Star, as it is currently known, up for debate, is a comedy pop culture podcast that asked the important questions

and speaking of throwing to our listeners for advice. We've done this through the Sanspance Radio Discord where our beautiful listener, Corks, has asked, what would be the worst thing to Honey I Shrunk the? When you can get access to our Discord, if you subscribe to Bad Brain Boys, which is very exciting.

You can give us a suggested topic that maybe we'll do. There's plenty of episode topics in there we ignore, but occasionally there's a diamond in the rough. I wouldn't say ignore. We definitely love them. We read them. We put them on a... We put every... single one, even the bad ones, no offense again fans, on a spreadsheet.

Yeah, that's true. And then we look at the spreadsheet and we go, oh. Yeah. And then we go, oh, who suggested this? It was probably Jackson. Yeah, yeah. I'm sneakily in there under a pseudonym, trying to get my episode to it. Jompson.

Yeah. Jopson, Babley. Yeah. Oh, another, look at this, stupid suggestion by Jompson Mubbler. Well, that seems like a really good one. Hey, who would win a handsome off between Jackson Bailey and the rest of the world, it's Jackson.

Do you do that one? Maybe we'll do that one. Also, if you sign up to Bad Brain Boys, you gain access to a bonus episode of Plumie the Not Star Month. That's true. Which we don't tell people enough. No. The most recent episode, I think, is, how would you deal with 600 guys?

Yeah, yeah. A stella topic. It's crazy we keep those a secret. All of the plus episodes are strange, I will say. Yeah, it was the, what would you do with like 600 guys, like superpowers? Well, because I think we said guys and then Dusha made them super powered in the episode

and threw us. Yes. And then also an episode of, we do a show exclusively for people who sign up the Bad Brain Boys, where we go through Marvel's 1976 comic book run, what if? You just picked a random year.

It really did. And we try to answer them. Anyway, this isn't an ad, there's just the start of the episode. That's just information you need to know. Yeah, just for you to know and do what you like. And we're going to stop ripfantsradio.com. Yeah, I'll click around, sign on.

Yeah. Come on. Anyway. What are you, what's the worst thing? Well, I mean, I would, to shrink. I would say that shrinking your own children is bad. Yeah. Yeah, I agree.

And I think that maybe 15 years ago or whatever we did the episode, we discussed that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not the ideal situation. No. You've got a little baby boy. If he was the size of an ant, would you be stoked? No, I'd lose him. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Right now, right now, right now, he's at the shops. He's at the shops. good, like, you know, height that I can be like, oh, yeah, there he is. You know, he's playing. I'm like, oh, yeah, there he is. He's, you know, crawling towards the cat that hates to be touched. I'm like, oh, yeah, I should do. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And he's good height right now. Have the cats hissed him yet? Uh, yes. Just the one. Yeah, the one who hates being touched. The one that is often seen as the most popular cat, but your other cat, way better. You know, kimchi had, dude. Kimchi.

Yeah, kimchi, true and true. She leaves Tiramissi for dead. She's got Husper. Kimchi does look like a rat. She does love to climb my shoulders, which I do love. She's got that personality. She's got a really, like, Tiramisu is a fluffy cat. And she feels like a fluffy cat.

Kimchi feels like a different thing. Yeah, like a big. She's like a large rat sometimes. But she's great with the kid because a kid will just walk all over her. And she's just like, she's just like, yeah, this is chill. I remember once our old dog before he died, we were at a...

That happens to dogs. Yeah, we were at a party with a bunch of, like, family friends and stuff. And the dog and a baby came into the room together, and the baby was just clutching under the dog's ears and pulling them, like, down to the floor,

and the dog was just looking at us like, help me, what's happening? Yeah. And we were like, ha, ha, ha. And we let him go. Suck shit, dog. Anyway, that's why, He died.

A baby pulled Zia's off. And he died. Yeah. Wrong, baby. Anyway, shrinking your own kids, bad. Yeah, well, I was thinking... No, hey, I was thinking, how about you let me fucking talk? Shut up.

Okay, all right. Shut up, you weren't listening. I get it. Go on. Shrinking your own kids is bad. Okay. But, controversially, I think you can live with that. If you had an aunt baby, yeah, it's more stressful than regular.

Keep a minute job. Whatever. But if you accidentally shrunk your own head, life gets very difficult. They don't make hats for little heads. Because in Honey, I shrunk the kids. Yeah. When the kids... Honey, I shrunk my head.

Oh, honey. Bad news. Bad news, honey. Oh, I don't even want to turn around. Tell me you only shrunk your mouth. Oh, geez. Oh, jeez. I always said, yeah, Mr. Wife.

Mr. Wife, I've shrunk more than my mouth. Oh, my God. I'm going to turn around, your head's going to be the size of a grape, isn't it? Smaller. Oh, my God. How little is your head? Well, because in honey I shrunk the kids, the kids are the size of, like, they're smaller than ants.

Yeah. Ants are big for them. If you shrunk your head, I can't hear you. Yeah. I turn around, I go, his head's gone. And then I look, I get magnifying glass. Look really close. And I'm not.

Yeah, really just hear this. Well, easy to put you out of your misery. Yeah, yeah. It's the very simple, and the whole body just fall and crumple. Oh, I shouldn't have done that. Well, I did say shriek it would have done it. I've killed my friend. I just, I don't know why I did that.

It was just a reflex. I'm looking at you with a tiny head of my brain going, don't pop it. Don't pop it, don't pop up it. Oh, I've just killed them, man. Yeah. But it didn't feel like murder, so I'll be able to sleep sound like tonight anyway. It felt like crushing an air.

Yeah. Well, I did say that I was shrinking my head. Yeah. And your vocal cords are in your neck. So maybe I still just sound the same. I know, that's scary. No, but they'd be loud booming like, yeah, like air coming through your kid. Play your own lips off.

Yeah. Honey. Honey, I got two levels. a bad news so you. I have shrunk my own head and I have blown my own lips off. If we make my head big again, I won't have lips. How do you walk? What do you mean?

With my legs? Yeah, but your eyes are so tiny. Your perception of reality is so different now. I would just close my eyes. Because when things get small, like the world becomes very different. Yeah. That's why babies are crying all the time. Yeah. The world's too

much. But like your, your head is smaller than an ant's head. Yeah. I worry for your brain the most. You now have small brain. You also have blood pumping to your... Yeah, I think you don't get down stairs, to be honest. I think you go to look to eyeball your shrieking machine. What's wrong down there?

Do I drop a peanut in this? Dead. The moment your heart does one pump, your tiny pee head flies off into the roof on the ceiling. Your wife and children come over and they... They go, where did his head go? Yeah. They just see a tiny smear.

Is your neck a little, too? Or is it like your neck is become a flat plane? He's got thick vocal cords. So then it has to like paper up. I imagine that it would be like kind of like a reverse, not sieve. What's the other thing? The funnel, a reverse funnel shape. So kind of like a triangle.

It comes to a point where your tiny head is. Yeah. So you're shrinking your head, I imagine, was not going to, you know, have tiny head on open gash wound neck. Yeah, yeah, yes. Because that isn't really shrinking. That's just to capitate it. Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I figured. So no exposed blood, but yes, pumping blood will probably kill me. Yeah, yeah. Because even if it is like, okay. My good friend wanting to pop my little tiny head would also kill me. That would kill you. Because even if, yeah, it's a gradual shrinkage. A tapering.

Tapering is, most of the gradient. Gradual shrinking. That's what I call swimming in the ocean. Oh, my right, fellas, zapped up top. Yeah. Instant. Instant. Yeah, penis goes back inside my body.

It's crazy. Dicks change. Yeah. And that's just something that people need to think about more. Yeah. There's so many states of dick, you know. Yeah, that's really true. The half bono?

That's a classic. That's an iconic one. Hey, half bono. Actually, no, I'm going to walk back what I was about to say slightly. Three-quarter bono, I think, is the most attractive a penis gets. Interesting. Full bono doesn't do it for you? Well, it doesn't move the needle.

No, I mean, it's just, I mean, if I'm looking at a full boner and it's my own, the needle's already well and truly moved. Yeah, that's true, that's true. I wish you were three-quarter bar. It's useless. I just think, because like three-quarters, yeah, like, not the most suitable for its use of sexual intercourse. The making of love, yeah. Yes. But aesthetically, I feel like that once it gets further, it gets like too angry.

Yeah, that's true. It doesn't seem. Like, it crosses over from like, ooh, to like, whoa. It's go-time. It's here to do business. Also, there's like, you know, 100% where rare you go. Also, there's like 100% plus. And that's what it's really angry.

When you wake up in the middle of the night, you're like, I'm too hard. Do I have a prostate issue? Oh, no. This is going to be a crazy phone call. Hey, doctor. Hey, Joel Zammat, I can't come into work today. I've just woken up with a scary bono. Me too.

What did we eat? Bono. Oh, come pick you up to go to the hospital. Thank you. Just two friends, giant erections, walking into the hospital. Hey, what's up? Things went wrong. Hey, not related, but this is a problem.

Well, related in one way, which was bonapil soup. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's crazy. If a bonap pill goes wrong, you've got to get a needle into your dick to get the blood out. Whoa, that's cool, dude. They drain your penis. Yeah. I think it's really nice that having a bone off just on.

its own feels good. You don't have to do shit. Just having a boner is like, nice. This is a pleasant experience. I feel like that, yeah, it's something about like,

you can feel your body fighting gravity and winning. Yeah. With a gradual, tapering. Sure. Why, what's wrong?

What was the transition out of this talk for? I don't have to get what I was talking about. Black and shrinking, maybe? Who knows? Gradual shrinking. Gradual shrinking.

Yeah. So even at that point where it's like, okay, cool. Yeah, your blood vessels are like, yeah, they're accommodating. everything. What's going to happen though

is you're either going to have a low blood pressure because the blood that's in your head now drops because there's less of it when it goes through the... Won't there be high blood pressure? Well a bit of like won't be both though because it's kind of Well would that even out? Perfect blood pressure? I don't know. Go to the doctor

they say you're a perfect health. Have you changed your lifestyle recently because your health is off the chance but I mean that in a good way. I mean my head the size of a pee-a-oh. Because the The blood in your head, that becomes small. Yeah. And so then that'll drip down into, through, like, you know, your veins or whatever,

and then it'll go back to your heart. Yeah. And the heart's like, oh, no, we've lost a lot of blood. Yeah, what's happened? But then there's blood coming up, which is going to then shoot through. I don't know. I feel you're going to get real, like, dizzy, and then your head's going to pop off. Yeah, I'll be very dizzy for a second, and then dead.

Yeah, like, I'm talking, like, yeah, that micro moment that you're, yeah, like, the blood leaves your head and drips down. I'll feel. I feel you're going to get a bait, and then... No, no, no, no, because my brain will need less... Because a lot of blood goes to the brain. Yeah, and if one... No, no, no, because if you're shrinking my head... Yeah.

And the blood shrinks... That's in my head shrinks. I don't think that's going to make... My head's going to pop the moment my heart pumps. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But that shrink, I don't think will do anything because it's shrinking the blood relatively to the brain. So the amount of blood that was already in there is presumably,

and up for debate, how much blood my brain already needed. It depends on whether or not you think I'm currently running. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I agree to that. But then the moment it hits down, like, the blood is going through your vein in neck. It's going to hit, like, well, there's not a lot there. Yeah, right? Because it's a small blood. Because that blood doesn't enlarge in when it hits that vein.

So it's just going to be like, you know, say it's a full tunnel of blood. And then it goes full tunnel. Oh, no. Oh, no. Yes. Oh, bro. Also, when you breathe... Anyway, go on.

What do you want to know? We'll do our best. We'll do our fucking best, too. Breathing, actually, yeah. We'll get to that in a second. The heart pumps blood. Yes. Indeed.

Does it create blood? Oh, no. Oh, no. What do you mean? If you get a wound and you lose blood. Yeah. How much blood can... How much blood can...

the human body feasibly replace. There is a number. There is a number. But are you saying if I didn't have a heart, do I still have blood? No, that's not what I'm asking. He's saying, where does blood get created? But that's what I mean, if I don't have a heart,

am I still making blood? That is one hell of a side step from my question. No, I'm there. Because if blood's made in the heart, we posit. Here I don't want the hell my we know. We wonder, if you had no heart, could you still? have blood? Oh, well, there's people that don't have a heart.

Oh, like, they take that, they get, a machine is now their heart. Yeah, yeah. And that's pumping blood around. So therefore, unless the machine is making the blood. Wait, doesn't the blood go in, then out the heart? Yeah, it gets oxygenate, oxen, oxen, yeah. There is some ventricles. The pump of the heart?

Yeah, it's part. No, the heart is the pump. Yeah, but that's what it means if blood go in. Yeah, and then blood go out. blood come from. It gets oxidized and it goes back out. Yeah. But does the heart make the first blood? Well, so it's all to do. Hang on.

Rambo. Hang on. Hang on. Let me think this. Okay. Through capillaries. And when you breathe capillaries make the blood. You're breathing in the oxygen and it oxygenate through all the different, I don't want to say ariola. No, that would be wrong.

That would be really wrong. And I know that that is very wrong. about, good stuff. You stay out of this. But isn't there like, it's sort of... Aorta. No, that's a big vein. It just sounds like Aereola. I thought that might be weren't meant. Isn't there something in the

lungs? Oh, fuck. That maybe looks and sounds a little bit like aerial, but isn't anyway, but it like oxygen goes into that. Hey, want to hear something awesome? I got a sentence here that is going to make us very... Stupider? I'm confused. I don't know if we can get stupider.

Blood cells are made in the bone marrow. Oh, that makes sense. Yeah. Yeah. Then they have a white blood cell, like issue. It's in the bone marrow and stuff like, yeah. But is that where... Yeah, I should have known that one.

But when did the... So bone marrow makes blood? It's made in the bone marrow. So yeah. Yeah. How does it get out the bones? Thanks. Pillar.

But the bones are hard. Well, they're not. The bone marrow is not... Yeah, my bone marrow is on the inside of bone. Yeah. Well, I... Is it... Yeah, bone is hard, but isn't there, like, little holes?

Oh, bone is porous. That's true, actually. Like a concrete. Like a sponge. A hard sponges. Or pumice. Yeah. Okay.

Is that true? Okay, so the website I'm on... Oh, God. And it's good to be Googling blood. Yeah. The website I'm on makes me feel a little bit better because the first heading is what is blood? Okay. Blood is a life-maintaining fluid that throws through the body's blood vessels.

One of the main fluids. Yeah. Arteries, veins and capillaries. Yep. See, we need them. We're on top of that. Yeah, yeah. What is blood made up?

No, no, no, my business. I want to know. I'm there. I'm across it. I want to know. Where's it come from? Where's it being made? Yeah.

They skip ahead. They go real basic and then they go complicated. And the answer that we want is in between those two things. I go donate blood. I am like, what was that? What was that, Jack? What are you wishing? I go donate blood.

I say, I don't know, how do you donate, in terms of like... Five liters, six liters, whatever it is. You just take eight, 20 liters out of my body. I don't need it. When I do it, when I do donate, it's plasma, which is different because they'll separate the blood from the plasma and they pump the blood back in. Okay. Hey, do you know what plasma is? It's the liquid part of the blood.

Yeah. What's the hard bit? The cells? What about this sentence? Think of blood production like a family tree. Don't know. What do you mean? At the top of the tree, there are the blood stem cells, which are the youngest blood forming cells.

Okay. What? And then you get the myeloid stem cells, obviously lymphoid stem cells. All normal blood cells live for a short time. Okay, I have donated blood. I have donated, let's say, can you Google how much blood can you... Donate? How much blood can you lose before you're dead?

Okay. And then I want to back it off, back it off a little. I've donated blood, that amount. Two liters. I've donated two liters of blood. I am woozy. Yeah. I have a rest.

How I get blood back. Must be from bone marrow. Red blood cells, which are made in bone marrow. Millions of them are being made and die every second. So I've like, I've gotten, I've gotten rid of, I've gotten rid of, I've gotten rid of two liters of blood. I have sat down. Now, my body.

does the bone marrow like Oh shit We're out of blood We're out of blood We've lost about two liters Time to up production I'll find out Do you make more blood

If you've lost heaps of blood Yeah Because surely Does that mean you're Does your bone marrow know What's going on? It's like Are you sitting there being like

Where my blood And the bone marrow is like Don't worry fam I got this In that family tree I'm the Papa Famil familiar? I think maybe it just comes out normal style. What do you mean? Like I think you just

you make it at the same rate no matter how much blood you've lost. Which is why you need to go to the hospital if you lose a lot of blood. That's why they do blood transfusions because it'll be too slow otherwise. So if I'm what do you, okay I go and I donate to it as a blood. You say normal style. So say your blood, say your blood. Where's my blood going? Say your blood. Am I breathing it out and I'm pissing it out? No. What?

How do I... Why's always making blood? Blood cells die after 80 days or instantly. Where it goes? What are you doing with your old blood? Yeah, where old blood going? It must go into piss and shit. Right?

It must? And making like, is it hair? I don't think it's a hair. Why not? Hair is skin. It's because of... Keratin. Because of AI on Google, it is so hard to find

any information that I actually trust. Yeah, the three idiots trying to decipher. How body work? How blood be made? Because if, okay, okay, so it's like, all right, my body is always making, let's say, how much blood is in the human body? Like six liters. Six liters, something like that, sure.

So I have six liters, I've got six liters. No matter what, I've always got six liters. My bow marrow is like, yep, all right, we make, say, half a liter. We get rid of half a liter. Yeah. That's my question. And so then it's like, well, I go donate blood. I go rid of two liters.

Yeah. They're like, okay, well, we're still making it at a certain rate. Yeah. So, well, we'll eventually get up to a certain point because we're getting, we're getting rid of less than we're making. They're taking in. Yeah, I guess. So they must be. So where's that old blood go?

It must come out in the same way anything we don't like in our body goes. Piss and shits. Mm. Or spooze. Yeah, peas and poos. Mm. Or maybe your body absorbs the old blood back. It loves to do that shit too.

Your body absorbs shit all the time, dude. Because pissers and shits are just like the bad bits. So. But you don't want to have old blood in your body. That's fair. So it's got to go somewhere. File? No.

I just googled how is new blood made in the body explain for a child? Good idea, dude. If I could explain blood to a child. And now this is... Too much information? It's too simple. to the point where I can't... Like, decipher.

Yeah, like, as in, it's just like, this thing, this is how you... Because they keep focusing on, like, how the body fights, like, makes a scab, basically, to stop the bleeding. I don't care about that. And then it's like, your body sends a message. Uh-oh, we need more blood. Then it sends a special signal.

So the body knows. The body is, the body is like, oh, cool. We've lost two liters of blood, make more blood. make it fast. No, but why would we do blood transfusion? Because if you lose too much... Okay.

That's what I mean. As in like, is a certain rate? If we lose too much, it'll take too long for the body to put the blood back in. So we've got to do a blood transfusion. So it's not...

Yeah, because we can't... Because we do a blood transfusion if they're losing more than two liters, right? I've waded through this dog shit response from presumably different AI. But it's hidden as a man wrote this. Okay, okay.

So... So, you lose bloodshot. Your body goes, oh shit, we need more blood. Yeah. Hit up the bone marrow. Bone marrow goes, brother, I got you. Yeah. But you can't just make something out of nothing.

Yeah. So it draws iron, vitamins and protein out of your body. Yeah. The stuff we eat. To create. Yeah. The matter is neither. It sounds like you're losing...

Matter is neither made nor destroy. Your body can replace the watery part of blood quickly. blood quickly, but the red blood cells take a few days to weeks to be fully replaced. I guess because we need the raw material, i.e. like, stuff that is found in red meat. Yeah, okay. And other things. Got to eat a steak. Make red blood cells.

Uh-huh. Yeah. That makes sense to me. That makes sense to me. Yeah. Where old blood go? Where old blood go, dude? What happened to my old blood?

Doesn't the heart? Well, I just pumped it. No, because old blood doesn't exist. What the fuck are you saying to me? Because isn't the whole thing with blood getting pumped? Like, we use a shit out of the blood and then it goes back to our heart. And then when it gets pumped, it gets oxenated. So we have all the blood we're ever going to have?

No. Did you not listen to my bad explanation? But assuming I don't get cut or stabbed. Or donate or whatever. The bloods. No, because you're still. Yeah. See, this one's complicated.

No, because your organs and shit would still use blood. what are they using blood for and they're using it and then it goes and then it goes we use so we in our body we use the blood

and then it goes then what happens because we use it and then what is blood doing in the body is it carrying shit what is blood

what is blood for I know I need it but what's it good for what's blood yeah it's moving oxygen around the body right and also it's taking away

the deoxygenated cells. Yep. Deoxygenate what? Yeah. So it's like a river. A white blood cells sort of treat infection and stuff like that. It's kind of like your immune system

is your white blood cells. Blood is your transport system, right? Yeah. So then... It's a circulatory system. I'm a genie. Yeah. So it's just transporting shit. Yeah.

It's like imagine if you can imagine trains in your body And the capillaries are the stations Interchanges Yes And it goes from having lots of people I eat oxygen Yeah No people know oxygen

And the people are Or passengers are with as many kinds Yes Because there's oxygen men And then there's white blood cell men And there's like fighting off virus men Yeah exactly And that's

what veins are trains. So what? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, veins are train tracks. Yeah, okay, cool. Then what old blood? Well, because if... Because when it's moving around, it's picking up and dropping shit, right?

Yeah. So, but then when I donate it... Yeah, what about this? Okay, no. We answered that. The bone marrow is like, oh shit, we need more blood. So we donate, i.e., we've got rid of some, like, tracks. Yeah.

Our bone marrow is like, where construction... Aren't the tracks the veins? Tracks of the veins. Okay. Bones of construction. My blood train arrives at kidney station, okay? And lets off some red blood cell man. They work to their fucking bones.

Yeah. And get kidney station and become old and dead. They have an exit plan through the uri. Okay. Or are they, you're a super highway to penis town. Because they become old and either dead or they have, don't they go back in the train because they're the ones with no oxygen? Yeah. And we breathe them out.

Is that the answer? Yeah, that's what I've said. That's what I thought the answer was. They go to mouth town and they get breathed. No, they go to heart town. No, heart town. And then they go, which says it's a lung town because that's how we breathed out the CO2. Does it?

Yes. Yes. But the heart puts the oxygen. No lung. So the lungs are like a hospital. We breathe with lung. No, I know we breathe with lung. We don't breathe with harm.

We breathe. We breathe with long. Yes. And then we... Because the hot... No, the long is talking about the aorta stuff, or are ariola stuff before. You breathe in. Long, hold oxygen.

There's like lung has whole like the branches and shit, right? Yeah. And then there's like... Lung do have capillary in the mind. And then the oxygen from the lung, it goes. crosses over into the veins or the artery or cross over to somewhere

and then goes to heart. Who do you reckon looks the cleverest out of this conversation? Oh no. I think it's a fight to the bottom. Yes, dude. So, yeah, I think shrinking your own head's bad because I'd die.

Oh, yeah. And even if I didn't die, imagine eating. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You couldn't get off. Well, yeah, it doesn't really matter because even if the body readjusted and the blood pumping from my heart to my brain didn't pop my tiny head

and even if I could still breathe and talk like normal and didn't blow my lips off. Yeah. I think navigating like the world is hard. And navigating will be fucked. Yeah, and eating, you'd have to eat like a single grade of rice. Which is not enough. We'd have to eat a lot of them.

Yeah, but then I would I be able to... One at a time. I would have to be... I would have to rock like... An IV. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's true.

That's true. So, like, if you're, again, when you're a little, little tiny head and your big giant hands, or regular hands, trying to, like, somehow grab a, like, a singular grain of rice to put in your tiny mouth is going to be... Your spatial awareness is going to be fucked. Just absolutely out the window. Because from my point of view, with tiny... Yes. Would your eyes adjust?

Oh, I don't want to have to think about eyes, boys. Your eyes would adjust because... Because even though my head is tiny now... Yeah. I would... would I still see my arms... as the size they are, like. Oh, I see what you're, okay. Because I know when you look at, like when we look out, we see our nose.

But because we always see our nose, we would see like the front of your chest and stuff. We move it away. No, you'd see because we see outweak, yeah, our arms. So, yeah, it would be huge. You're just your eyes. Because your aunt weight are the, well, you're so little. Everything is in the way at all times. It would be like, imagine if you had on either side of your head right now,

two train-sized arms projecting into the front of your vision. Yeah, and you're like... But you're kind of... Well, because you've got to remember, as made famous in a lack of color by Death Cap for Cutie, when you see, you're actually seeing the picture upside down. Your brain's like, brother, we're clever. We know that's not actually how things are...

Your eyes are just perceiving it upside down. Yeah, and then there's that experiment that they've done, which is like they wear glasses, which makes you see upside down. and then they took off the glasses and your brain was like, we're still seeing shit upside down for like, I think they wore them for a week

and then they were doing the same thing for like a week or whatever. Why do my eyes fucking do that, dude? It's not your eyes as your brain. No, but no, like what? Like, why the world's not upside down? Why didn't we get it? Yeah, why didn't we just?

Like, what are we fucking doing, dude? Yeah, eyes, what are you doing? What are you doing? What are you saying now? Well, okay. Why do we see shit upside down to your brain processes it the other way? Yeah.

It's just. Why not see it the wrong? right way up from the beginning. I do not think the gravity is the answer then. Why not? Why would it be gravity? What are you? What do you mean?

Remember how he said who? Djerica looks the worst. You now. Currently you now. Well, I'm seriously because we're getting pulled down very slightly. What do you're talking about? What's got to do with eyes? I talk about the reverse thing, maybe it's to do with the whole like, well,

if we're getting pulled down, but if we're seeing everything, reverse our style, it feels like we're being pulled up. And that doesn't work, so let's flip our eyes or some shit. I don't know. What's I'm saying? Can I retract everything I have said? Can you need to lie down? I don't know.

What the fuck was that? What do you... Well, if we're... It's just the way that the eyes are made. Why would they do that? We didn't make them. Yeah, but we evolved that way. Yeah, I went for being a slug in the scene with no eyes.

And then when I was like, oh, time to evolve to see shit. I was like, let's do it as a fucking joke backwards. No, but like... Do all... The fishes that can see do the same thing? Is it the walk right way up or upside down? A fish, what a fish seeing. Are they seeing right way up or they seeing upside down?

A fish sees out to the side. I understand this. As a fish brain, what is it doing? Is it doing what our brain is doing? We're just flipping it? I don't know. And if so, why did we do this? Why would we do that?

What are apes do? And when they look, are they flipping it as well? Are you worried that we live upside down? What I'm confused about? It's because of the way we see Is lights going into our fucking eyes Which then create an image on the retinas, I'm pretty sure Shouldn't have used actual phrasing

Yeah, yeah, yeah Light comes into your eye hole Yeah Projects shit onto your brain Yeah, but because of the way the light bounces around It projects onto your brain upside down Yeah, that's just eyes Yeah, well, it's not like we were like,

It's not what I would have done Yeah, but we didn't get, we didn't make eyes My question now is Are we the only animal that does that, or is that every animal? I think, well, a lot to animals. Or is it gravity, apparently? Animals, there's a bunch of animals with freaky eyes out there, so, like, presumably some guys are seeing it. Because, yeah, why would our-

Different style? Why would our brain go different style? Why do we just adapt to be like, okay, it's upside down, great. Because surely there must have been a beneficial reason for us to go flip it again. But maybe that's not how evolution works, you know? Because it's like, it's appealing to think that we evolved perfectly, but maybe that's just a fuck up that we've adapted. So, yes, to the animal question, but also the bigger thing is like, yes, in theory,

you're seeing everything upside down, but that's just how it's reflected on your eyes. You're not actually seeing things inverted and upside down. It's just, because it's like an outsider looking at your eyes, which is how the image is perceived. But when you're using the eyes, that's not how you're seeing it. The brain's going to have to process an image either way, so it doesn't matter. You know what I mean? No, really. Okay.

So. I thought that one was polite. You're just like, I need to go. Now to Google eyes, upside-down gravity. Although it is true. Okay, this is from Reddit. I'm starting my sources. Reddit.

Okay, great. And this is from a cognitive scientist, or so they say. Okay. Although it is true that the image on your retina is inverted up, it's down and left is right. It is only inverted relative to an outside observer. That is, if I'm looking at your eyeball, the bottom part is getting light from the upper part of the world relative to my being upright. But your brain is not an observer. It does not have an extra set of eyes looking at your retinas and comparing that to be the world.

There is only one image, what's on your retina, and the brain has access to, that your brain has access to. and there is nothing for it to be inverted relatively to. There is no flipping that the brain has to do. Yeah, I guess it's stupid to imagine the world is an image projected into your eye because it's like an inaccurate way to describe what's actually happening. Yes.

There's no... So like on paper, that is what's happening. Yeah. But how your eye is actually working, it doesn't mean shit to your brain. Yeah. Yeah. So, seeing upside down gravity can refer to...

to reversal of vision metamorphosia. Well, because spatial awareness. A rare condition. The vision is rotated 1A degrees. So there's a really just... M-MF is out there with upside-down eyes. Yep. Oh, my God.

There's natural energy images. What's I got to do with gravity again, sorry? Yeah, it's just called seeing upside-down gravity. So... Wait, it's called that if I go to the doctor and I say, I'm seeing stuff. He's like, oh, you've got seeing upside-down gravity. Yeah.

Your gravity. That's what it's called? Well, I think it's colloquially called, yeah, look, again, because Google is AI now, that was what I got. Blood shouldn't have done that. Blood shouldn't have done that, dude. It's a neurological symptom, and maybe you've had a stroke. Okay, if you're seeing the world upside down. Or it's a seizure or at you.

Basically, you need immediate medical. Yeah, I would imagine. If I woke up one day and we're seeing the world upside down, I probably wouldn't just continue about my business. I'm mine. Yeah, fair enough. You don't tell anyone, you're bump it into shit more. Sorry, sorry, nothing's wrong with me. Okay, I'm calmed.

Okay, well, I was going to pick my tongue to shrink. But then it's maybe too close to the head. So maybe I'll just do torso. I feel we're getting the same problem. Little body, huge arms and legs poking out the side. So you're first, firstly. You are no, apart from all the, like, everything popping. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Or maybe different because the heart is... No, no, no, he's going to have... He's the opposite. Yeah. Because your heart, no, you're just going to collapse. Yeah. Because your heart is not going to be able to pump it. I've given myself a little heart.

I think you've given yourself a lot of pressure, but then it goes into like a lot of pressure into vast, empty space. Your heart rate would... Your heart's going to explode. Yeah. Yeah. You're going to have a heart attack. Heart will explode, but also you don't...

You won't have the strength to hold everything up. I'll be a pile of limbs and head. You'll be a dead man. I'll be a dead man. I mean, also, yeah, your torso would be so small that the weight of your head would just crush it anyway. Yeah, that's true. Because you have a famously heavy head.

Yeah, me specifically. Heavy lies the head. Yeah. I think that's the end of the quote. Heavy lies the head. Heavy lies the head, full stop. Yeah. I think you could use the shrinking technology

to rob a bank really easy. I mean, think about this. Yeah. Okay. Step one, shrink yourself tiny. size of an ant and the shrinking machine using such as a mirror or something. Okay. Then you get it in like a wagon and you take it to the bank.

How are you moving it? Yeah, how am I taking it to the bank? Is this one of your famous schemes that really requires a second person? No, you can do this one man. Okay, one person's style. Okay, you've shrunk yourself. You've shrunk your machine. Okay, you shrink a wagon.

No, no, no, no, no, uh, uh, uh, uh, you've already jumps too far ahead. You shrink yourself. Yeah. How are you using the machine? I shrink the machine first. How you're drinking yourself? With a mirror. How you're shrinking yourself?

And then how do you shrink yourself now? The machine will still shrink me. How are you using a machine? Why not? Because the beam is a set size, so I just put it on my feet or whatever. Wouldn't I just drink your foot? And also, it's so small you can't touch it. You'd crush it if you'd press the bottom.

I could do it with tiny tweezers. No, you couldn't. Okay, well, I'll just, I'll work the device. vice so that's rather than a beam, it's an area of effect. Okay. Which contains within it, myself and the machine. Okay. Great.

It's a self-shrinking machine, okay? How's it powered? I begin the, it's got a battery, an internal battery. Okay. Now I begin the arduous journey of putting it on wheels and taking it to the bank. So a little wagon. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, okay, cool, you're taking it to the bank.

How far away, okay, currently adult size, Jackson, how far away is, the bank from you. Pretty far, I guess. How many minutes we're talking by car? By car, be like maybe five to ten. Five to ten, ten minute drive. Let's just say like by walk. Yeah, by walk.

That would be like a 45 minute walk. Yeah, probably. Yeah, okay. Now, a few days. Might be. Weeks, yeah. How are you getting sustenance? I'm eating berries and whatever.

Too small. Too small to eat berries? Yeah. Well, I'm eating dew. I guess. Yeah, that's water. It's the things that people have dropped on the floor. Yeah, old fanta.

Dog shit. I wouldn't eat the dog shit, too. That's going to be his only choice. We dropped in a field of my own dog shit. Oh, that's on us. Also, like, how do you plan on navigating? Yeah. I don't know if GPS works.

Or works so tiny. I mean, like, I can kind of... Surely I could figure out where I was. based on How? I don't If I'm out of the street If I'm out of the street

I can kind of figure out Where I am Yeah because you can see Like the end of the street You won't be able to see anything You can see grass Well all embiggin myself periodically To check

Why When there's no cops looking But you haven't done anything yet Yeah So I Yeah but obviously When I robbed the bank And the cops are like

I bet it was that guy I kept shrinking Can you have a shrinking machine? No, yeah. So you're just gonna do it in the street and see what happens. Yeah, I'll just make sure no one's looking. Oh, here I am. Tiny again.

Okay, well, let's just say you've done this quite a lot closer to the bank. Okay, sure. Okay, let's just say, you're at the bank. Okay. Now what? Shrink the bank. Okay. Wait, so you didn't even need to be small in the first place? Then you're little, the machine's little.

Sheen's little, and the bank is little, so everything is in relatively the same size. Go on. You get killed by security. No. Then shrink the bank again. So double shrink the bank. Why wouldn't you just make yourself the... Double shrink the bank.

Why don't you shrink the bank? Then put the bank in my pocket, and then we sneak out of there. No one knows who did it. Because if I'm there, I'm going to be caught in security cameras and stuff. But if I'm tiny, they won't see who did it. And then I take the bank... But you're shrinking the whole bank. Yeah.

And then you're shrinking the whole bank. the bank again. Yeah. So why you just shrink the bank because that's where the security cameras are. Because if you shrink the bank, if you're shrunk and then you shrink the bank, so then you're still relative to the bank, the security cameras still get you. Yeah. Also, they're probably not hooked up to the system anymore.

What do you mean? You've shrinking the whole bank. Yeah, but I'm not the electricity. What a system? The power of the bank will be gone when it's shranked. Oh, you think it's getting, okay. And then if they press the like, oh, call the police button, it's not going to be connected to anything anymore.

But the way the area works. Won't it then shrink you and the machine and then and the bank? That's because you guys made me make it an area of a fact-trinking machine rather than a directed one. Well, it's because the directive one, you can't figure out how to work. If it was a directed one and what are you shooting, which part of the bank? Just a whole bank. Just a whole bank. Then I take it.

And so you've got the bank and all the employees and the customers in your house of parm- I'll have to kill a lot of people, yeah. Okay. So it's murdering. Okay, so your answer, how do I rob a bank? Murder. Well, yeah.

I've thought about a gun, a big gun. Oh, no, because then I might get killed. But this way, I take the bank back to my house. I make myself big again, and I make the bank big again, but it's been double shrunk, so it's just shrunk. Nobody knows I did it.

What do you do? Hey, here's this idea. You will need a guy, someone else you can work with. You shrink yourself, and maybe they'll get like a ray gun that can also then shrink things. And then enlarge them as well

And then you shrink yourself with the ray gun And you put it on like, I don't know A crisp $10 bill Okay And then you give it to your friend To be like, go to the bank Because we're going to like Exchange the bill

They're going to put in their safe And then I'm going to shrink everything And then I'm going to get out Yeah, okay Yeah So wait, I That's just do that So you're saying I smuggle myself

Yeah Into the bank Yes Yeah Yeah That is probably clean off Yeah Then I shrink all the guys

I shrink all the jewels and the gems. And then the monies and then I leave. And then I, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Why wouldn't you just shrink the bank? Well, that's what I'm thinking. No, just once from outside. Because they'll see. They'll be like, they'll be like,

this is the guy with the shrink gun. He shot the bank. Okay, if you don't shrink yourself and you just put your shrink ray in the car and you've kept it a secret, who knows you've got a shrink ray? Yeah. Where if you're shrinking yourself in the street

because you want to take the shrink ray because you're small. And you keep, like, you know, bigging yourself up. Who? Oh, never mind. Oh, the bank goes shrunk. I wonder who did it.

We've got this guy for a periodically like a week just a popping out of nowhere getting shrunk and like tiny again. Maybe it's a bad plan. Yeah, I'm thinking maybe it is. To smuggle yourself and... Yeah, then rob the bank that way. Because then also then they won't know

that it's been robbed so instantaneously. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Once the banks disappear... There's probably going to be onlookers that are going to, like, call something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But then I kind of figured

if I have the bank in my head, like, who's checking my house for the bank? Well, also, when you're robbing the bank, you shrink the bank, even if you just shrink the bank, you're just going to walk over to the bank and pick it up? Well, no, that's why I'm double shrinking it. Yeah.

So no one can see you pick up the bank. And then when I head home, I unshrinked the bank. Pop the heads of all the people inside or whatever. Then take the money and big in it. Bada bitty, boombeak, could you like bank rob? Could you, maybe, what about, like, if it works at the distance, you should think the bank from a distance? Get, like, a fan, so you, like, blow the bank somewhere else.

Yeah, okay. And you go over there and pick it up. Yeah, well, that could work, too. Yeah. It's also effective. That'd probably take less time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And also, I guess, and while you're, like, you know, a gust of wind and moving that bank and destroying everything.

Yeah, yeah. There's probably some people that'll just die through that, so you don't have to skis there. I don't have to do murder. You don't have to murder. I mean, you are still kind. It's a manslaughter, really. How do you plan on... Not a lot, I guess.

It's still different. This goes well. You take all the money in the bank and you've killed everyone in the bank. Then just disposing of the bank. Yeah, how do you plan on using the money? Yeah, I just... I'll just... I'll just...

He takes it to the bank. You imbiggin it. You got all the money that you took from the bank. Everything the bank had. Yeah. Are you going to... I just live a cash lifestyle. Lawn to that money.

You pay cash. Yeah, you're going to have to launder it. What's step one of you laundering money? How does one launder money? Wow. Go to a casino? Well, that's actually one way. You could go to the casino.

The only problem is, though, that if you are using exclusively bank bills, because the way the casino would work is you would have to only use, you'd have to mix up real money with the ones. Because if you're just like, hey, I want to put $50,000 on black and they're like, hey, this is all the money that was at the bank? Is this a $50,000 that was robbed from the bank? You just go to, like, the pokies, and you exchange that for, like, credit, and then you just take it out again? Like, I know you're not meant to, but is there, like, a thing you could just do that these days?

There's a certain limit. Yeah, you probably could. But they just, like, you know, there's so many, like, RSSs around, like, boo checking kind of stuff. There's that. But if the limits... You could invest in a business. Yeah, that's true. And then, like, you know, uh...

I could invest in my own business selling my shrink, right? Yeah, you could do that. Yeah. You know, Jackson's shrink rays. Oh, whatever? Yeah. They're like, oh, I wonder who shrunk the bank. I don't know.

I don't know. Do they know that they shrunk the bank? Because the bank has disappeared. That's a good point, actually. I'm just going to not slip up. Hey, they're talking about who shrunk in the bank as I'm selling someone. Sorry, my shrink machine messed up, but I've only got tiny money. Is this still valid?

Somebody looking at my shrink display model of shrink rate. It's got bank as the last setting. What's that about? I don't know. I don't know. It's probably a kid. It's probably a kid in here, mess him with my shrink, right? Well, as opposed to, like, your own body in terms of the worst thing you could do.

Yeah. It's shrinking. I was thinking you could shrink the concept of love. Oh. Shrink that right down. No one loves anyone. No one loves anyone anymore. The capacity for love is really tiny.

I like that. I think that'll be an awesome world. So everyone just becomes, like, you know, 90% is a bit more. more of a country. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You got a shorter rope. I like that. You know, everybody's on the edge.

Yeah. Less forgiving of our loved ones. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You've slighted me. Oh, I am furious. Yeah, absolutely. Love for my fellow man, it's there, but it's little. Yeah, but it's minuscule.

And they need to just piss me off once, and it's gone completely. Yeah. Because how much love do you currently feel like you have for your fellow man? Yeah. You know, like if you can put a number to it, Out of 10? Out of 10, where are we at? What type of day is...

Like, right now? Right now, say right now. Okay. Like a normal day? How about... Just like a regular day. Just a regular day. And let's say, can you give it...

Let's love numbers and more about like... File app heart sizes. Oh, okay. Like, you yourself have the capacity to love mankind, at least. Have I been on the internet the day that I'm deciding this? In the morning, you did. Yeah. It's not...

getting above a four out of that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I think it's a, yeah, I think the problem with shrinking the concept of love is some people could go to zero. You might make the purge happen, which is pretty cool. Yeah. Is that the only thing stopping the purge? Love for a fellow man?

Yeah. I honestly don't even think it's... I don't even think it's that. I reckon that the thing stopping us from the purge is consequences. Yeah, I mean, that's the only thing. The thing is you can love, you can have great love for your fellow man and still want to kill a man. You know, that's the complexity of the human being, you know.

Yeah. Some people have a great love for their loved ones, but they'll happily take the life of another human being. Fair enough. Okay, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's his life. Yeah, if you look, I mean, we've got a fiction, but if you look at, say, I don't know, Dexter.

Sure. And, like, say, the Trinity Killer. Exactly. I mean, although then it was, no, no, he was proven that he was also a piece of shit to his family. Yeah, yeah, yeah. outside, it did look like he loved his family. Exactly. And Dexter wants to love

his family, I think. And he loves that one, what was his name? Not Debra. He loves his sister. Debra! No, no, I know. Not Debra. No, the one that ends up getting got by the Trinity Killer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He loves her. You know. So I guess it does have... If Dexter has the capacity for love, and also the

capacity to kill other people, you know, there'll be others out there just like Dexter. So... And then, yeah, well, if you should shrunk Dexter's capacity of love. I think we have a bit more of a serial, serial killer. Yeah, because can you go inverse? So that, what, it becomes like so little, now becomes so much?

Well, no, like, as in, if I've got, say, 1% capacity for love for my fellow man, and you shrink it, can I go to negative one where I wish to actively harm my fellow man? Or does it just bring me to zero? I reckon zero. Zero probably is already wanting to hurt your fellow man. I think zero is just I don't care with my fellow man. Well, I thought five would probably be apathy. No, because I think it's like it's a measure of love.

So zero would be apathy. It's like a, it's like a tank, right? If you have like, you know, 10 love for humanity. And then that gets reduced now. So the maximum can be only one love for humanity. Yeah, yeah. Like the equivalent of one love for humanity is like, is 10. But that gets reduced so quickly.

Yeah. So like even if you had 10 love and then you went on to the interstate, net and that got reduced to four if it was all shrunk now. I guess like I'm rocking a real quickly. Yeah. And then you'd be like, well, I just don't, I know. I don't care. I don't care.

I guess like I'm rocking anywhere between a two to a five most days. I wouldn't say I have an infinite capacity for love for my fellow man. Yeah. So even on a day of two, I have yet to commit any unwarranted violence. Yeah, exactly. So I'm saying, it'd be apathy. Hate speech. I'm rocking at eight.

That's. hate speech but not in like the slur hate speech but as in like speech fueled by hatred yeah I too gets me there yes yeah yeah oh spite is a good motivator yeah absolutely some people are real motherfuckers oh yeah and by some I mean 80% of humanity

yeah it's a ratchet flat up we live on what about if you used it for this as a way of freaking using shrink ray is to prank farmers so you go to the farm smoke out trick classic I was thinking Small udder He comes out in the morning

To milk the cow Tiny otter He can't get the fucking milk out The cow gets sick Calf Otter gets sick Otters pop Utters pop

Dead cow I say this is not what I meant to happen You're pissing yourself laughing I guess you could like Yeah yeah shrink all their crops Yeah yeah yeah tiny corn Make baby corn Make a whole bunch of new fruit

Baby apple Baby plum What if you shrunk Like a whole You get a tub of apples. You shrink order apples and then you go, hey, have a handful of apples and you just like

hump, ate like, you know, what? A hundred apples in one bite. Yeah. Do you, what? Are you getting the nutrition? Are you getting more? Are you getting real fucked up? You're getting the shits. Yeah. What are you doing here? If you eat a hundred tiny apples, is it like eating 100 big apples? And it's

a hundred big apples that had just been shrunk. Yeah. Well, I mean, the vitamin shrink, like a more, like, What did you say? The vitamins would shrink. Yeah, good point. So you're getting less. Yeah, like if you had a liter of water and you shrink it.

Yeah. And then drank it. Yeah. You're not drinking a liter of water anymore because they're measured, they're measurements. That's true. Yeah, yeah. Well, I guess it depends on what they're shrinking. But wouldn't it, is that water now dense?

Yeah. Dense water. Well, do the kids in Honey, I Shrunk the kids hold their weight? No. No, they're just the same. They're the same as they, like, they're not like lighter or heavy. They're just the same No, but there would be lighter

Well, they're not in the movie, they're not They weigh the same as an adult child That is not an adult child Yeah, that's right They weigh the same as a fully grown child They would be lighter But it doesn't affect them So they

Yeah, they're lighter They can ride an ant But they're... So they are, yes, they are lighter Comparatively lighter, I guess Yeah Yeah, I think you're misunderstood I'm saying they no longer

weigh 40 kilos Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, okay. But that's the weight of a child, right? I don't know. The adult child is 40, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Adult man's anywhere, depending on the guy, anywhere between, like... 40 and 100.

Yeah. That's a basic range of a guy. 40's probably a little... It's a little guy. For a little guy. I reckon, like, if you just, like, took a rain, probably like, sheavony or... No, you'll think about, like, you know, like, like, jockeys. Yeah, jockeys?

Yeah, but that's... Yeah, but if I'm forgetting the jockeys... You leave the jockeys. Drink a jockey fastest horse at the race course The race force Can I

How much can we use this Can we like Rather than set it to 100% Yeah Can we just set it to like You know 20% Because if you 20%

Trunk a jockey You'd be great Yeah that's good That's in It's less suspicious too Exactly Because otherwise it's just Look like a horse

Yeah And you go You can't throw Jockey loss horse In a race And I'm pretty sure The horse would You'd fall off

He'd fall off Somehow I just don't think he could sustain grasping and core controlling that. You have a loose horse. You got a loose horse. I don't know what the jockey does on a horse, but I feel like it does something. Can you?

Drives the horse? Can you not enter the horse? What happens if you have a wild horse? A jockeyless horse on the racehorse? I'm at the racetrack. I'm at the racetrack. I'm a little gate. I like, I'm a jockey.

I'm on my horse. I'm like, oh no, I forgot my mobile phone. I need to quickly scroll Reddit. I hop down off my horse. I scroll, you know, they squeeze under the gate. and I run off to get my phone. The gates open. The horse knows that it needs to run.

It's disqualified. Yeah, but what happens? Yeah, but the horse runs. Yeah, the horse runs. What will the horse do? Will it run, will it do the race? Will it just stop? Will it eat some hay?

It would be like, I'm going to start kicking? Yeah, I think it'd probably panic, right? Oh, it wouldn't panic necessarily. It would probably start. Doesn't the jockey calm it down? No, the jockey's fucking whipping it. Yeah.

The jockey's doing the opposite of calming it. It's getting it fucking pissed off. Yeah. Yeah, okay, fair point. What about a... No, okay, because goats do calm a horse. Yeah. So what if we shrunk a goat to like a little a goat?

Okay. So it was like, you know, let's say... And then what hung it around the horse's neck? Yeah. Like a... Strap it around it, like in a papoose or whatever. But we make it like, you know, like a... Have the calmest horse on the farm, yeah.

Yeah, like a toy poodle kind of goat size. Yeah, that's good. And while the goats's freaking out. Yeah, yeah, the goats... Like, while the goat's stress levels rise. The horses will plummet. I assume that's how it works. Could you use it to do a Wynne Brothers'

a little man type situation? Where you pretend to be a baby to steal diamonds? Yeah. In a way. Obviously, I'd shave my beard first. Yeah. So you want to change the... So set the setting to like...

Yeah. 40%. 40%, 30%. Become the same size as Johnny Baby. Frank your friend! Yeah, chuck a diaper on me. I'm Johnny Baby. I hold Johnny Baby, and then we shrink down you, then we put you in Johnny Baby's bed.

Jolzama and go, be like, good morning, Johnny Baby. Good morning, Dad. You're an idiot. I'm like, what did you do? Where's my child? Where's my baby? I'm your baby now. Where?

And I'm pissed and shit my parents. Oh, my God, you have. Well, time to change you, I guess. Yeah. Do you. Have fun. This is backfired. I'm being changed by my very good friend.

Be fucked up. Just to take the diaper off the pubes and the whole 33-year-old balls. You have shat on your own wet-y-pupes. Christ. Jesus. Christ, Jack. Here's a tail. Wipe yourself.

Yeah, we'll do. This prank went really south pretty quick. Could you do? I forget the name of the film. But it's starring one of the guys. Dad was in Garden State. Okay. Not Zach Braff, but his friend.

Yeah. And he had dad. Sheldon? No. Sheldon's in Garden State. I don't know. But they adopt a lady. Okay.

They adopt a girl. But then it was revealed that that girl was actually... Oh, you're talking about an orphan. Oh, do an orphan. Yes. Yeah. It would be awesome to do an orphan, dude. You could do an orphan and be little and try and bang the dad, I think.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's my plan. That's crazy because that's where, um, Peter Salis God is the guy's name That's the guy

Yeah That's a good plan It's a good use of shrinking I mean it seems bad Yeah Yeah yeah yeah I'm gonna really Fuck up a guy

With my shrink Ray I'm gonna really fuck up a guy Fuck up my life Yeah You could really ruin some guys Well you could live rent free In an orphanage That's true

You know If you want to save some money Yeah I can keep doing this Just as a little guy Yeah And I just go to an orphanage For my meals

And my bed and stuff I think in terms of worst, like, personally, you can just shrink your own house. Yeah, that's true. You're like, well, I'm fucked. You're like, well, I'm fucked. Why don't I fucking do that? Where's my car? Shrinking.

Yeah. I'm fucking up my own life. Yeah, this is awesome. For a bit of fun. Yeah. Getting clothes in a big pile shrink? Uh, got nothing now. Nude and homeless.

Sweet. Let's see what I get up to, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shrink my friends, family, all my loved ones. Dude, rocking around nude, homeless with a shrink, ray? You are a menace. If anything you see, just shrink in everything, you can come a complete menace, fuck up your life. Exactly, why not?

Everyone else? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that's a good, that's a pretty good way to do it. Yeah, that's probably the worst way to do. Well, any way that didn't immediately involve death. Yeah. That is the worst thing to do. Just shrink everything in your life.

I think it's, fuck my life, dude. If you just shrunk your head and, like, yeah, it's instant, man. Yeah, exactly. Same with torso. to suffer. It's merciless, really. I mean, it's merciful, excuse me. Yeah. It's like the lethal injection. Yeah. I think it's funny.

Although they famously fucked that up every single time. It's funny it's striking your head to be like, all right, like, if it didn't kill you, we're like, we need to get you better again. And then to try and remember how big your head was the first time when we make it bigger, make it slightly too big, slightly too small. I think I'd look good with her slightly too small head. Yeah, yeah. Just you kind of think where you, like a doll and my head, yeah, just like a slightly too, like. Like, if my head was at 91%. I could go the other way and do like golden eye, like big head. Oh, DK mode!

Oh my God, yes, dude. I think we'd all look good DK mode. Imagine the thoughts we could have. They'd be so huge. How does the heart work? Never mind, I know. Yeah, man. Imagine how much knowledge we'd have with big heads.

Oh, just give us the biggest house possible. I want mine to take up a full garage. I was going to say I want mine to be like, so I, still could walk into a regular doorway. But yours is... No, no, no, no. My body is you... This is how you get Modoc, dude.

I want to be able to, like, if I get head big, so I go, it's like, the weight just, like, just slam my head forward. I have a wheelbar up. Oh, yeah. Into that, and that's how I live my life. That's good, and you're constantly going, hmm, because you're having such a big thing.

And then I say, what you're thinking about, you say, don't worry about it. You wouldn't understand. Yeah, exactly. Big thoughts. Too big for your room. My thoughts in the garage. Yeah.

The neighborhood kids go, we got a question. Let's go ask. the big head in the garage and they wheel it up. How much a cigarette, sir? I go, come closer and then I eat them. Come closer, children, and I may answer your question.

The kids, they're just scaring themselves, you know, it's like a bit of fun in the neighborhood. Except some do get eaten? Well, yeah, that's how you sustain the big thoughts. Yeah, exactly. Your big thoughts were like, I should eat guys. I need more blood in my brain. I should eat the children of the neighborhood.

Great idea Great idea I'm so glad I've got this big powerful brain Yeah Powerful brain Big powerful brain Big powerful teeth I'll start by eating the neighborhood pets

Come too close And then when the kids come looking for their dogs I'll eat them Yeah And then when the adults come looking for their children Well that's a bigger snack for me Yeah exactly I've really used my brain well

To become a kind of frightening menace In the neighborhood I really like the idea of getting caught Come like a mimic, but for a garage. Yeah. And I can't get away. When the cops come, that's too happy.

They can't miss. Yeah, they just open the garage. Fuck, fuck, fuck. No, no, no. Oh, no. You're trying to eat the bullets now. Yeah, that's my plan. Just that forces it goes straight through his back of his throat.

Oh, fuck! They don't even wheel up the garage. They just shoot through the door. Yeah. You don't even see them coming Your last thoughts Yeah your last thoughts were I'm glad I eat those men

That was a good child I just ain't Bang bang bang bang bang bang back back back If you're in a garage You can just get a car and a hose Yeah yeah Thitted through Yeah it's look

It's not gonna be hard to kill me No But what a reign of terror I had You gotta be thankful for that Truly horrifying Gotta be thankful for that So there's many ways That you could really fuck up your table

Yeah absolutely I hope that was a good episode for you, Corks. Yeah. Shout out to Corks as well. Shout out to Corks, dude. Yeah. On that note, I've been Joe.

I've been Jackson. And I've also been Joel. And if you want to suggest a wonderful topic while you just go onto Sanspansradio.com, you sign up to any of the bundles we have. But they've heard for plumbing the death die. Just bad brain boys plus. Sign up.

Give us your hard-earned cash. And then click on that. I would like to go onto the Discord. And I would like to suggest an episode And I will listen to this latest episode of Plumming to That Star Plus And what if Daredevil 2013 I think is the most recent what if episode

I will navigate RSS feeds that really just absolutely suck So much us But I will do it I'll navigate these RSS feeds I'll be like what is a podcatcher And then you might email me And you won't get this but I will make this sound

Yeah Yeah And I, while we're doing this I'd just like to apologize to our YouTube watching audience I just realized that for the majority of that, I was not eyeballing the camera. I was faced this way. I'm looking at the wall.

Just looking at the wall. Just zoning out. Thank you, my good friends. Because my neutral position, I just changed my chair, and prior to that, the chair's neutral position was eyeballing the camera. The usual position for this chair?

Dead space in between. Daring at the wall. This was good Shrinking thoughts good Maybe that's what I use it for I put it right in my ear Shrick my brains Yeah

Anyway If you hate eye contact That was a great episode Yeah Well thank you so much for listening And we'll see you next time Where we do another good episode Goodbye

Goodbye Sorry Goodbye Goodbye Goodbye My name is Ryan. This is my best friend, Tony, and we host the Tony and Ryan podcast. And despite being from Australia, people right across Canada listen every single day. Jared's in Alberta. How did you discover the podcast?

Someone was just like, oh my God, you need to check out. These two from Australia, and I was hooked right away. I was like, oh, my God, I was pissing myself laughing in my truck, and, like, it just got worse from there. Oh, well, but it's good. In a good way. It gets worse with how good it is, and that's just the beauty of friendship. Tony and Ryan, every day.