Plumbing the Death Star - Where Would You Hide In A Roofman Situation?

Episode Date: November 23, 2025

What would be the ultimate roofman downfall? the sweet, human act of falling in love? Do you yearn to see the back ball shot of channing tatum in the hit new movie roofman? they should've called him changing tatum seeing as he was likely in a state of undress when the back ball shot transpired.Links to everything at https://linktr.ee/plumbingthedeathstar including our merch, social media platforms and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey everyone and welcome to this week's episode of Plumbing the Death Star. I'm Joel. I'm Jack. I'm also Joe. I introduce too many podcasts now. And every time I start talking, I'm like... You're like, where am I? Why is we just like, is real cut it short?

Just be like, oh, I'm Joel, that's Joel. This is Jackson. And hey, guess what, idiots? This is what we're doing today. And I'm just like getting real aggressive with it. I could do that. Or I could say, Plumming the Death Star is a comedy, pop culture, podcast, and ask the important questions.

Like. Okay. What question we're asking today? I know what the general topic is. Oh, yeah. How would you hide better than roofman? Where would you hide in a roofman situation? Where would you hide in a roofman situation?

So me and Dusha recently watched. the movie Roofman. Starring Channing Tatum. Sturston Dunst. Surprise appearances from people like Ben Mendelso. Yeah, I feel this is one of those episodes where maybe...

Penis Parker guy. What's his name? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, where sometimes, like, Jack, you're like, whatever, hit record and we hit record and no one has, like, really clarified what's going on. You're doing to me. We're doing it to him. No, no, no, no. Except this time,

two out of three of us know what's going on. What do you know? No. No. What do you mean? You didn't know the episode. title. That's the vibe. That's the vibe who's just going to go in it. You knew we were going to talk about Roof Man. We discussed it, but we discussed like three different ones, and I left the room.

I believe it's your executive decision to pick one of the title. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's an unwritten rule of plumbing the Datstar. I would say that this episode is far more likely to we've got Digimon, we've got Pokemon, what are you morning next or whatever, where an episode just happened to me, except now it's just happening to you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, Joel Zammett, I pointed at him.

Check us out on YouTube. The point, for that beautiful point. Zoom in the point. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh no, I put it in the audience at that time. Give me pointing it. Yeah. There we go.

Which, you're out of frame for me pointing anyway, so yeah. Well, I guess we could do it side by side. And I guess a live react of me getting pointed at. Joel Zammett's live point reaction. It's really funny on YouTube, just quick side note. Because of the layout of the room. Yeah. When I'm facing you Zammett, it looks like, you can tell from the, like,

yeah, the layout. The layout. It's like I'm clearly facing someone, but whenever I'm looking at Jackson, it looks like I'm just not paying attention to the conversation It's just like I'm like yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it's because I've turned fully sad. I don't look like I'm just turning away from you. Yeah, you're like when I'm looking to decide. I'm looking at Jackson. Oh, fuck, I'm looking at Dusha right now. I'm looking at Jackson. Side by side again. I'm pointing to Jackson. Jackson Bailey Live point reaction. Oh, This is going to be good for the audio. If this isn't our most viewed YouTube video, I don't know what else to fucking give you. Heads will wrong. Okay, so in roofman. He is a criminal who breaks into McDonald's through the roof. It's a sad situation where he fought in Afghanistan.

Yeah. Gets discharged. Comes back to... Can't make any fucking money. Comes back to America. He's got a particular set of skills, but there's no place for him in society. He's a sad thing that happens. But he's trying to, he's disappointing his daughter.

He's buying her old McConnell. No, what? He's giving her old McConnell for a birthday because he can't afford new McConnell. What's McConnell? Do you remember Metal Lego? Yes. It's that. The set's called The Aractor, which I liked.

Yeah, dude, that's awesome. Yeah. That's what I call myself as a supervillain. And I'd have flame powers, and people would be like, why? And I'd be like, observe my erection. Yeah. That's why. Anyways.

We were just talking about a different movie just quickly off before we hit record. And listeners, it's a popular movie, so I'm sure across this. Yeah. But yeah, the opening scene of one battle after another features are boner in pants. Oh, that's really awesome, dude. Seeing a boner in pants. Yeah, but to start a movie. where there's just a guy rocking a boner and it's just on screen.

Well, you missed back balls in a roof man. You saw back balls, Channing Tatum backball. That's crazy. I pissed at the worst time. Yeah, he's nude. Anyway, so he's breaking into McDonald's to get money so he can buy nice things for his daughter, but he's caught. Yeah, he goes to jail. He robs 45 McDonald's through the roof, and he's notorious.

So they call him the roof man because he comes through the roof. Basically, what he does is he waits for them to open their restaurant when the staff come in. And he's waiting for them, and he's like, hey, guys, sorry, I'm only here for the money. I don't want to hurt you, but put your jackets on. I'm going to lock you in the freezer. When I leave, I'll call 911. They'll come get you. You're not going to die in here.

You're not in danger. I'm just going to rob. I'm just the roofman. I'm just robbing the corporation. You are fine. They have insurance. Victimless crime. Then he gets arrested.

Yeah. But he's roofman. So he breaks out. Well, yeah. He uses his roofman ingenuity. He's so good at observing. Exactly. They go.

Hey, don't worry, Roof, man. Even though you robbed 45 McDonald's really going to charge you for one. But because you put three people in a freezer, that's aggravated kidnapping. Yeah. 45 months in jail. No, no, no, not 45 months. 450? Yeah, it's like 30 years in prison.

Yeah, yeah. So he's like, yeah, we understand what you did for our country and that you were nice, that you didn't hurt anyone. You were in prison for 30, 30 years. 35, 45 years. So, but he breaks out. Good, but he can't. Like you should go back into society. He's like if I'm the fucking roof man

He's on the run. He's on the run and he's like people always make the mistake of just trying to run as far as they can as quick as they can and that always results in sloppy decision making you're gonna take a breath and just like hide and then his friend if they expect you to run you slow down exactly they want you to zigzag And then his friend is like hey he tries to call his friend who was like making like past Yeah, you got a zog expect you to zig you zong. Yeah and when they think you're going to zog Zog, Zog. Yeah. I'm Zog, Zog. Exactly. And then when you think you're gonna Zog, you Zumb.

Yeah, exactly. And when they think you're Zom and go back to Ziggin. You're not expecting. You never had a Zod? No, not. Keep on their fucking toes. Yeah, he's got a friend. A guy he fought with in the military.

And he calls up Steve and he's like, Steve, brother, it's me, Roofman. Yeah, I'm Roof Man. I'm Roof Man. I need fake IDs. And he's like... I need identification. I need the right credentials of papers to get out of the country. Get me to Venezuela. And he goes, call me back in a month.

Yeah, but in a month he calls him back and like... Steve's been deployed again. Yeah. Oh, no. So he's like, fuck, I got to wait till Christmas. So where does he hide? And this is what we'll have to figure out too, because we can't pick Roofman's place. While he waits until Christmas, six odd months, where does he hide?

Roof man picks... He becomes wall man. Yeah, there's a kind of strange semicircle partition in the Toys R Us behind some bikes. and he gets in there and makes it a little living situation and he live in a Toys R Us. Yeah, and then... Move Man become War Man become Toy Man. Yeah.

So you know, like, when you go to like a department store, whether it be a Kmart or a Toyseross, and there's like a big... There'll be like a big shelf or something, but sometimes they make it fancy and they're like... So they've done that, but it's just like a permanent bike situation. So there's... It's like a convex kind of that he tucks in.

And he figures out the security cameras so that they're not recording. And he lives like a king on peanut ammins and baby food. But then Roof Man makes the decision. This is the movie you should go watch it where he makes the fatal most decision. Fatal Floor.

Well, it's not fatal. He makes a bad decision. Where he falls in love. The first rule of Roofman. Never fall in love. His friend Steve is so pissed off. He's like, brother, like, I know you're good at heart and I told you to use your skills

for robbing McDonald's or whatever. But you should never fall in love. He's like, if you just simply were on the run normal style and kept to yourself, you would be in Venezuela by now and no one would know. And they can't extradite you, so even if you were caught, it wouldn't matter. Yeah. But instead, you've fallen in love, Roofman. The back half of Roof Man becomes effectively uncut gems for roofs.

As you go, stop doing that Roof Man, get out of there. You know, you're like, I'm watching a movie. It's based on a real story. It's based on a real story. And if it's based on a real story of a man who was a criminal and then broke out of jail and lived a unconventional life and it's set in the 2000s, you're like, well, there's only one way we know this. It doesn't matter how much of a good dad he's being to his bizarre adopted family. He will go to jail when's it coming. I'm scared for roof, man.

Initially, like, where you're describing you to hide out for a bit. He hides out in a wall. And it's got to be for six months. Yeah, see, I was thinking like of another, based on a true story of film. But I think that also falls down to that, unfortunate, that fatal flaw of falling in love of the terminal. Oh, yes. Where he hides out in, like, well, he's not hot, yeah, they live. He lives at an airport.

But then he also fall in love. Yeah, he's never fall in love. First rule of terminal man. First rule of terminal man. We should make an avengers of terminal man, roof man. Terminal man's sad, though. He's okay. Yeah, but if you're calling someone terminal man.

It's because he's, oh, excuse me. Yeah, what is it? Is that your alarm? Was that your alarm to? That sounded like a text message Or it was your phone turning on? That was a phone turn on noise. It was a message, but I'm going to put it on silent.

Excuse me. Text or a... Facebook Messenger. Oh, okay. Yeah. Why is that your tone for that? Yeah, I don't... That's your default?

No. That's not default. I didn't change it. I didn't touch it, dude. I didn't touch my phone. You think I'm going into menus on my phone to pick a tone? Wait, accidentally. Yeah, yeah.

In my pocket, maybe. Yeah. Do you lock your phone when you put it in your pocket now? I try, dude. We know he does it. We know categorically he doesn't. There was that time I either made like 50 people in our Discord like mods or... You remove the mod situation from like two people and kick someone out of the discord for no reason.

From your pocket. That's really funny, dude. That's really funny. Yes, Terminal Men. Because he called Terminal Man because he lives in the airport terminal, dude. Where would you hide out? So what's his plan of getting to Venezuela, by the way? So he just needs to wait until Steve has kind of acquire everything, like all of the documentation.

Then he just needs to go to the airport. But he also needs 50 grand to pay for it. So, yeah. So basically Steve's like, hey, you've just broken out of prison, you're too hot at the moment. If you survive a month, then you can come see me, sort you out. But then Afghanistan deployment adds another five to it. Okay, okay, okay. What about the museum?

Night at the museum style. And I night at the museum the night guard. Okay, I will say one huge issue with the night at museum situation. Museums have crazy security because everything there is valuable. Are they checking inside the sarcophaguses? I reckon, yeah. There will probably be some senses before you got to the... The trouble is getting the mummy out, you're right.

Or even if there's no mummy in there. And also, you're forgetting Jackson about the curses. Oh, the curses I always forget about the cursors We've been to heaps of museums in our times And we famously Yeah, famously This is a story

Every plumbing the dust I was like Remember that time When we were so jail-like And we went to the museum Fought a pisser, dude It's a real pisser of an event Well

Everything's in glass cases Yeah, that is true Yeah Was this the case in 2004 When Roofman takes place Yeah Yeah It's a museum

There's so much security. Like, even, even, like, art museums where you, like, there's, like, sensors. If you get too close to a painting, an alarm goes off. Yeah. Like, they're protected, dude. They have security, heavily protected. I mean, the movie you picked, there's a security guard in the museum. Yeah.

But there's no, like, cameras or anything that the security guard monitors. He's walking around the whole time. You don't think there's security cameras in a museum. Well, okay. What have you got a camera? like a cash-in-hand job at like a dingy museum. Tricky. A last rampantable museum.

And then you become the security card. Okay. That's how you get a five nights at Freddy's happening to you. You'd love that reference, Zammett, if you understood what I was talking about. I understood. Now, the only thing with that is that Roofman's face is on the news. Yes, my face is on the news too. So people know, mess it all up.

I mean, you can. Yeah, you can do what you like in this life. Yeah, yeah, how you gotta fuck up like... Yeah, yeah, how you gotta fuck up your face. Okay, okay, this is what I do. So that you're not recognizable to a nation of people that have seen you on the news. Okay, it's 2004, so people are watching television.

I take the loss of my money. Yep. And I go to a tanning salon. How are you getting your money out? From the bank? No, I had a stash earlier. I was buried in the backyard. I'll allow that.

Okay, and I take it to a tanning salon, and I say, I just want to do my head. And for as long as I possibly can. Well above human limits. Until I have the most sunburned face Anybody is like very leathery looking face I've got the face of a man who's worked on a farm for 40 years You got the face of a man who isn't allowed on television anymore

Yeah you can't go hi I'd like to get a job at the museum Cash and Anna they go are you are you doing blackface? No no no no no no I'm doing tan face it's different Because like, it's not... No, no, no, no, no, no. I know that you've got... I was just trying to have sunburn. I didn't mean the new black face.

You went to a tanning salon. The whole thing is that it makes your skin dark. I was just trying to get a real. It would be real, maybe. But, like, this is what happens to David Schwimmer famously and he plays his world famous character wrong. Yeah, it's like, you just... It happens to Kramer, too.

Yeah. You fell for the same trope that affected Kramer and Ross. Yeah, man. That's embarrassing. Although I think in the Ross... You can't buy a shower that's too strong next? In the Ross situation, I'm pretty sure. It's like it's a spray.

It's not like a tanning salon. It's a spray. And he gets his face sprayed several times because he does a turn. Exactly. Exactly. So you could go there and, well, you know, the same... It's still black, mate. Yes.

I didn't know that. No, I'm Ross Gala! I'm doing him Kramer. No, no, no. No, no, no, no. I'm in trouble. I didn't know that this was a hurdle I was going to have to do. No one ever expects.

Until your plane was make my head darker, I didn't expect. I just wanted it to be really pink. That's all I was trying to do. Like, how about this lie in the sun? I thought if I said I lie in the sun, you'd have said, you don't know if it's going to be sunny. You don't know if it's summer. That's fine. Okay, well then I lie in the sun until I get a really sunburned.

He's going to look like you, but sunburn. What if you can stare? you've got lots of bees to sting your face a big idea i put winnie the poo and stick my head inside a bee-hot get a swollen head and then it's like i'm not jackson bailey come i'm back to baby i would like a by a goodigar bob there's sir you're so very sick at the moment this is my head it's rude of you to say it looks like i have a a condition. Yeah.

I'm trying to think of like what you can do, because obviously, look, multiple stings to the head. Yeah. Sure? Yeah. Are you allergic to bees? Not that I know. My dad's deathly allergic. Yeah.

So you stick your head in the beehive and you go, yeah, this will work. And we're just watching as you just go limp with you. Smash cut to me in the coffin, still with the beehive on. Still, booze, he closed the lid. It's what he would have wanted. He's going to be a hive down there. I like that the bees will die, too. Some small revenge.

How crazy would it be to be an ant and all of a sudden there's a bee in your hall? Whoa, that would be crazy, dude. Because bees are sort of like the ants of the air. Yeah. That's true. No one could deny that. It's more likely to get an ant in a beehive than a bee in an ant nest. True.

Yeah. Ants go everywhere. Yeah. And climb, bees don't big. Yeah, exactly. You don't see a digging bee. It doesn't happen. Yeah.

It's got me thinking. Yeah. Well, there's some bees or wuffs, they'll make their nests on like a fallen log, which is... That's true. Then again, it's an ant situation crawling into the nest as opposed to the beehives. The bees aren't going in. The bees aren't being like, well, that bit of ground, maybe we become ants.

There could be flowers in there. Bees aren't thinking that, dude. They're not pollinating roots. I imagine if a bee is in the dark, it gets really fucking confused. Well, there's no light in a beehive. Yeah. Oh, that's true, actually. Does light not shine through a beehive?

No. It's made of wood. Fuck, that's so true. I was thinking of a beehive. in like on a wall. Yeah, but like when you open it up and like, you know, if you didn't like a Yeah, that's true.

Bees do love the dark. It's cool to think as well. They'd be freaking it out because that's just like sunlight suddenly. Yeah, they don't know why that. No, but bees, I think they developed the sort of relationship with the bees. Or they're so stupid that none of this makes any sense to them.

And they're just like, they have no. No, but they're clever. They're thinking I am a bee. Clever as a bee. Yeah. Clever as a bee. What was that just an incredibly cooked experiment that they did with bees? It was like,

something they do like, navigation. Yeah. But the scientists kept being like, well, we don't know about this. So they kept just doing like really fucking with some bees days. Are you thinking of the ants where they chopped their legs off and shit? No. Oh, the ant where they put the thing on it.

No, it's bees. I'm thinking of bees. What were they saying ants? Yeah, yeah. Because there's that awesome ant experiment the Jackson told me about, which means it probably didn't happen. Yeah. Where they trick, they put like the, I'm going to sneeze. I'm so sorry. That's okay.

The leg lengthening trick they did the ants. Leg lengthening, you're like, fair enough, but leg... Leged short, no, that's rude. That's rude to the ant, dude. No, the one where they put the hormones on the bee, on the ant that was like, oh, this ant's dead. And then the ant was like, guess I'm dead. Oh, yeah, that is awesome.

That rocks. I think it's like a, the can bees tell time maybe. Okay. And it's just like, they were like, yeah, well, we don't know. And so they basically, like, put it in a, like, a... They just like, they just kept flying into different countries and being like, well, actually, we don't know about it. I get flying the same bees in different countries.

Most world throughout, worldly. A worldly bee. A worldly bee, the terminal bee. Yeah, his hive was destroyed, and so he can't go home. Yeah. He's got to live on McDonald's. Yeah. That's right.

So, yeah, it was to do with, once again, this AI, kind of give him this overview. So who actually knows? So it was like, okay, we're noticing that bees, they would appear at this Phoenix station at a very specific time. So let's see what happens. And so then they conducted some experiments. One was in the dark, and the bees still came. out at the train time, so ruling out light as like, you know, well, how they tell on the time. Okay.

And so then they were like, okay, okay, okay. So they kept just, yeah, making it more and more controlled conditions, including an underground in a salt mine. Whoa. To eliminate even the possibility of cosmic radiation and Earth's rotation being the cause. That's awesome. Yeah. When I say they really fucked up a bee's day, they really ensured. The bees had, probably the craziest life any bees had.

Yeah, so it was to prove that they have an internal biological clock. Whoa. They kept moving the same group of bees to new time zones. Did they just let the bees, dude, the honey those bees would be crazy. The bees continue to arrive at the original time, the original local time, demonstrating a form of jet lag and confirming their internal clock was not dependent on external environmental. Froggy bees. That's really cool, dude.

I'm glad they did that to be. To be a scientist and being like, all right, can a bee tell time? Yeah. How'd he do that? Time to travel all over the world. Well, it's obviously because it's due with the light source. Do it in dark. Be in the dark.

Oh, he did it. Did it work. How, why that? All right. We must take. We must take the bee to. A salt mine. Chile.

So, because I don't want no cosmic rays interfering. Yeah, true. Why? And this is probably one of those questions. no one knows the answer to. Or no one in this room knows the answer to. That's what I meant. Why are there no cosmic rays in a salt mine?

Are there not... Okay. Are there not cosmic rays everywhere all the time? Yeah, well, the cosmic radiate... Why a salt mine... Is this because salt mines are... Is salt mine... Is a deep mine?

Yeah. And that we can go there easier than say a lead mine. Or is salt somehow anti-radiation? And if that's the case, Why aren't they building the whole astronaut suit out of salt? Yeah, exactly. The horses would lick them to death. Space horses.

They're going to be wearing a space horse. That's what we'll get him, dude. Does salt have some anti-space property? Salt's absorbent. Yeah. And it's... Because that's why salt makes you thirsty. Yeah.

Is it good to put salt on a wound? Okay. Yeah. No, it's sting. It hurts. But why do people... Salting a wound is like a... Yeah, oh, that's salt in my wound.

Yeah. Because it hurts. Yeah. Oh, I was bleeding and now it hurts more. Yeah. Why? It must be that salt my... But licking your wounds is good.

Yeah. But you also... Yeah. Anti-space. So salt mine stop radiation by using deep geological formations to physically contain radioactive waste and the salt itself acts as natural barrier that flows to seal cracks over time.

So, because I guess... Awesome sentence, didn't help. Is it that the radiation from space? So it's like what we sort of... Well, this is like, I'm guessing, why salt mine stop space radiation. And they were like, do you mean, I guess, AI being like, I guess he means they're burying radiation in a salt mine? Is that what you mean?

Well, no, surely it's because the Earth is constantly bombarded by cosmic radiation. And it's only our atmosphere and maybe something called the Newsphere, maybe that stops it from getting N-O-O-Sphere. That's something. Stops it from getting to Earth. New-sphere. The N-O-O-Sphere.

I swear to God, that's something. I'm thinking because it's, again, it's very deep underground already. It's just not getting down. It's like a thick, like, it's a thick, stable salt formation and then it seals because with salt, it's like,

it's going to fill the gaps. And it performs a natural barrier. The newsphere is fucking stupid, dude. You're an idiot. Multi-barrier. It's the sphere of reason. What? What?

It's like... I thought it was a layer of atmosphere. No, it's like a situation... It's like a philosophical... Philosophical situation? I get to look up the new sphere too. Yeah, but it's like... It's like the sphere of human thought that maybe joins us together.

What? It's not a real... It's like a... Not a real sphere. Like, is this kind of when people are like, oh... It's like the way. The web of lies connects all of us to Madam Webb. Okay.

Or is it like, oh, on the day of, was it D-Day or whatever, where it was like in the crossword, like in New York crossword, like all these different words that the answers were actually part of, like, the operation to do such a thing. And it was like how, was there a leak or whatever? But it was just a crazy coincidence and this idea of like the giant zeitgerst around, like, knowledge or something. In the theory of Vernadsky, the news fear is the third.

third in a succession of phases of development of the earth after the geosphere, inanimate matter, and the biosphere biological life. Just as the emergence of life fundamentally changed the geosphere, the emergence of human cognition fundamentally transforms the biosphere. It's basically the philosophical version of God creating Earth. I've taken too many shrooms and we're all together? No, it's like the same thing of like, oh, God created Earth in seven days or whatever, because on day one, we thought of rocks, and day two, we thought of people,

And then day three, we thought of human thought. Yeah, okay. I guess it's the idea that you go, there's nothing. Then there's animals that just fucking shit. And then there's human beings that think about fucking and shitting in like an abstract way. What's the next? What's the next sphere, dude? Yeah, what's off the news sphere?

I think that's the end. The end times. Yeah, that's the peak. And going back, why salt mines? Yeah. So they are chosen because they're very stable for millions. of years and they're less prone to fractures apparently. Oh, okay.

Because in earthquakes, the salt will flow. The salt must flow. To close in new cracks. And that's why we bury, I guess, radiation stuff. In salt mines. And I guess that's also probably why we were like, put the beast into salt mine. Yeah, smart.

It's a safe, quiet place. Yeah. I guess a safe, quiet place is a salt mine. Yeah, you could, you could, salt man. You're salt man myself? Salt man in the salt mine? I get real prune. You get real dehydrated.

And all you have to eat is salt. Yeah, like, being around through the roof. Like living in a salt mine, I feel, would be bad for you. Yeah. But living near a beach is good for you. That's true. Feels nice.

You're relaxed. You look at the ocean. You go, man. He's right. It does feel nice. He's right. When you live near an ocean. Weather's your skin maybe?

Well, yeah. You think a sea dog? Yeah, salty old sea dog. If when you live near an ocean, don't you have to do more. protection around, like, I know for like cars and shit, because it's rusty. The sand will get in. No, the salt ross the car.

God, yeah. That's he can't drive. He doesn't know. The salt will get in. Are you paying attention? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, I'm in a coffin full of beans. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I know what's going on, dude, roofing out. Newsphere. I feel, yeah, being in an environment that is a very high in salt concentration is really bad for the human body. Plus, you're breathing you do.

Yeah, I was going to say breathing in that much salt can't be good, salty lungs. How to... Is it... N-A-2... N-A-2, which is salt. Or is it... No, N-A-C-L, yeah, you're right. Yeah.

Or is it N-A-2-C-L. It doesn't matter. Why do I know this stuff? Don't worry about it, listeners. Couldn't tell you how the heart works, but for some reason, just have the... Sitting in your brain, you've got the chemical composition of salt, yeah. Unless that was totally wrong, in which case, whoops.

Fair enough. That was sodium chloride, I just said. Yeah, N-A-L-2-L. Or N-C-L-2. N-L-C-2? Yeah, sodium chloride. which is not salt. That's, anyway.

Anyway, does that pool water? Like, is in like... Oh, yeah, like, if you're just in a room full of salt, are you getting more dehydrate, like dehydrate quickly? More quickly, because you're surrounded by salt. It feels like it couldn't be good for you. It feels like you're not yet, you would be.

But also, no... Oh, on Reddit, there is a... I wasn't very excited. I was like, the face of a salt mine worker, but it's just someone who's got, like, you know, salt on them. Oh, okay. I thought it was gonna be like real weather.

Yeah. Well, why does a salty sea dog... Yeah. Get that kind of like... Sun? Salt is NACL. I nailed it. But also helps prevent patients from becoming dehydrated. Ha?

Well, I guess if you have like a Gatorade, it's a bit salty. Electrolites. Yeah. Osmosis. Yeah. Ozmosis Jones. The man who lives in my belly. My belly.

He shoot red bloods. Red Bloods? My dreams are guys. Well, if you're, okay, let's say you're living in assault, man. Is Osiris Jones horny? Probably. No. I was Moses Jones, yeah, I actually think maybe not.

And I think it has a gruesome death of the main bad guy. I don't think he's horny. Yeah, because, like, how much does that give, like, the same with Cool World. Yeah. They have horny. Well, cool world's horny. Is it? Yeah, isn't cool?

Isn't there a way to get out of the cool world to give the cartoon woman an orgasm? Or have I misremembered cool world in an awesome way? I... Doesn't he have to, like, eat her out to get out of a cool world? I hope so. Am I making up the plot of an even better movie? Uh, I mean... Or maybe...

See, I had it in my head that it was not a Ralph Backsheet movie, but it is. Yeah. Osmosis Jones has the energy, like, it should be horny like Shark Tail is horny. You know how they have the sexy fish in Shark Tale? It feels like Osmosis Jones should have a sexy, like white blood cell. Yeah, it was very non-from memory again. I don't think I watch it as a kid, so again

my memory of it is not that horny. Yeah, it might not be. I can also see that, yeah. So if a cartoon wants to become real, so a doodle has to have sex with a noid. That's really cool. What's... Humanoid. Yeah, that's really

cool. That's great. Swank for humans. Cool idea for a movie. Jacking, that's how Sonic the Hedrog became real in the Sonic movies. No, he went through a hole that an owl made and then the owl got killed the owl was his mom right

and now he loves chili dogs that's really good in this salt mine situation you're living because there's no food in a salt mine other than salt

which isn't food which is not not gonna keep you nutritionally sort of hole how are you sneak because you can leave a mine yeah yeah

you're gonna sneak into town I was thinking like you can do like a small beach town somewhere yeah like live on a beach shack oh yeah Yeah, but it's not really like in a wall. No, you're living...

No, you don't have to live in a wall. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He just lives in a wall. Because couldn't you just do what like thousands of people do every single day? And like listeners, viewers, you might have someone doing this to you right now. Oh, live in their roof? Yeah, or you yourself are maybe doing this. I think that's far more likely.

I think more people here probably... My rent's expensive. I'm going to move into someone's roof and not towel. More probably the deaths... More people here probably the death stuff faintly. in their own kitchen and cannot identify the source. So, like, yeah, just like a residential house.

Yeah. Just, yeah, be like, is there a term for those? No, but... Roofman. Yeah, roofman. Is it just roofman? House hermit, you know?

Wasn't it in Japan that it was a thing where people were just, like, it wasn't living in the roof, it was just full on living in their bed and stuff because, like, they would have one person in the house would have a fully like nine to five situation. Or it would end up being like, say, seven till seven.

Yeah. And then the other person was working at night. They were effectively sharing a bed. They were sharing a house. Without knowing? I was like, what a great way if you were all on board. Oh, terrifying. No, no. One of the people was not on board. Very scary. Very scary. So, like, that's doable. And, like, you know, you just like... Live in the roof of a man. Yeah, living a person's house. But how?

Stealing a little bit of food? Yeah. How? Apparently, I'm very good, like, of, you're good at observation at this point. So you know when everybody's left the house. You're trying to find, like, yeah, people's, they're nine to five or whatever. So you know exactly like, because you kind of, I feel like you'd have to observe them for at least a week. Yeah.

To know kind of like the ins and out. Yeah. And at least you're like, all right, cool. I know, like, during the weekdays, there's a schedule. And in the weekends, I've got to be so quiet. Yeah. Oh, that's scary. But weekends, maybe you can, like, leave.

For the weekend, come back on Sunday. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Spend the night in, like, a shelter or something. If you can find someone's got a storage garage, like, as in, like, I'm saying, like, a garage attached to their house, but it's a storage garage. It's one that they'd never check. Like, the one that they'd be like, oh, I don't park my car in there, but I'll put, like, I don't know, this chest of drawers and this couch on the other. Yeah, yeah, all those things are like, you know, I'll get around to sorting it one day, but then if you are able to. Yeah, you, but I guess you can't reorganize it.

I think the perfect house to live. in is somebody who's, and obviously there would be some security you'd have to worry about here, but like one of those insanely wealthy, like, McMansions. Because there's no way they go into every room every day, and there's no way they know how much food they have. When was the housing crisis? 2008. 2008.

Okay, cool, because it's going to be a lot of empty houses. I mean, also, 2008 slash, now? Forever. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, but when it was like the real big one. Oh, yeah, because I guess this is 2004. Because in my head, because my plan was like, this is a very local reference.

There's a lot of apartment buildings in the docklands that are bought by offshore investors. It's solely just like a... Because basically what happened in Victoria, in Australia, for anyone who doesn't know, is they were like, we're going to start this beautiful, new bustling area.

Tourists will love it, there be heaps of stuff to do. We've got this big wheel? Yeah, we've got a big wheel. It's our own London eye. Yeah, we made the Melbourne eye, Except when we built ours, we didn't follow safety precautions. So it's had to be torn down and rebuilt like three or four times.

Because Australia gets hot. And then the wheel just got all fucked up from the heat. They were like, whoa, you cannot go on the wheel. Yeah, they made, they had two options, I believe, when it was like the first fuck up. And it was like, you got two options. One, you can open. But you're going to have to like basically after, it was like several years, shut down and then do the maintenance. Or shut down.

never open, and then do the maintenance, and then it'll be open for a longer period time, and they really should have been like, you know what, we've promised a lot of local businesses and a lot of like, yeah, people move over there, whatever, let's actually open up for a bit, and then we'll shut down later and then do the thing, and they went, no, let's do the other one and fuck everyone. And then it, uh, yeah, anyway, so it was meant to be this bustling empty center, like a kind of like a new city. Yeah, yeah. But, uh, they fucked it up, but then there was also massive apartment buildings. It was meant to be like, whoa, heaps a housing, like fun and cool, but

what ended up happening is like because Docklands and stuff, it was all just like handshakes on the tables. Yeah. It got sold to a lot of offshore investors, which is fine for offshore people to buy apartments. Yeah. Because especially if they're traveling a lot, but these were not purchased by

people that live in Australia or come here. Doclands did not kick off. Yeah, they didn't go up in money, which means they haven't sold them and they're just sitting there empty. You just live in an apartment. Yeah. That's a good idea. Just get a free apartment. How are you getting food? Yeah. Food, though, is the problem.

Food is the truth. The beauty for Roof Man is that he could eat peanut am and baby food. Because I was thinking like, yeah, cost is, but again, you got a camera, money. Money and like using cards, those kind of stuff like that. It's going to be a problem. I was thinking all the same situation where there's like

a lot of commercial properties, especially like post-COVID they were just shutting down and left front. And then you go down like you know, a main street where a lot of abandoned buildings, you can easily live an abandoned building. Problem comes food. Yeah. What about the carnival? Oh, yeah.

Very little security, and I'll just eat, you know, like... Elephant shit? I'll just survive on elephant shit. Yeah, exactly. I was like, peanuts. Well, peanuts is like, you know, candy canes and fairy floss that they've dropped on the floor or whatever. Okay. What about the zoo?

Well, here's another place that's actually, like, I've realized that I have expertise in. So you're talking about carnival It's kind of like the carnival Cinemas are massive Oh There is security at cinemas But they're almost always focused on where the money is

Yeah of course Who gives the fuck about the money If you can get the food And somewhere to sleep Yeah, yeah, yeah Also cinemas being big It means a lot of like stock tech Which means you take it

Like what roof bend does in toys or us If you're taking a bunch of peanut M&Ms That'll just be like Yeah they'll be like Oh, that's weird but like, whatever. I guess maybe stock take was off by a box. And also, if you eat...

Because a box, a box of chocolate? Like, is it like, oh, I guess stock take was off a box? To you, it's like, oh, I miscounted one box. But that's like anywhere between 18 and 30 bags of a confectionery. And also, brother... With popcorn. Surely with popcorn, that you don't know how much popcorn you have. Well, they come in, like, a rough idea.

They come in 15 kilo bags. But surely the margin for, like... Yeah, how you're going to pop the popcorn, though? because the popcorn machine will be in a cash handling area. Okay. Well, a lot of people will, like,

often will throw out like half of, live in the bin. Yeah, or they'll leave like a bunch of popcorn. No, no, no, no, no,

live in a fucking bin. I was imagining living in the vet, you know, getting into the vents and crawling out, just like grabbing all the popcorn and scarring back in. People are going to really hate to hear this. I've never,

like, hey, if you've been to the cinema, that's what you've been to, probably infested with rats. Yeah, yeah. Free protein? Free rats.

dude. You get some friends I guess but yeah I would be I would avoid vents You don't want to get eaten by rats Yeah you're trying to eat popcorn They're trying to eat you Yeah what about the bin scenario What about this bin? Live in the fucking bin

I live in the bin and I just have my mouth Open when people throw food Free meal or free cigarette In the mouth Well when does the cigarette go Into my stomach That's food That is

I mean you could maybe someone Throw some hat away a bit of raw chicken, you could cook it with a cigarette. Yeah, exactly. Yum, yum, yum. Cigarette cooked chicken. Well, I smoked salmon. Yeah, I've seen a guy smoking chicken with a cigarette.

Yeah, and then he eats it. And he's like, this is horrible. The worst thing I've ever eaten. Yeah. I'm not the most thing I've ever had my life. Yeah. Well, because you're feeling, if you smoke something with cigarettes, you're filling it with tar.

Yeah. It's kind of like being like, oh, a grader to cook a chicken. What you do? You get a plastic bag. You put the chook in there. You go to your car. You're wrapping. around the course, you turn it on.

Cars cooked chicken. Yum, dude. Delicious. You get like, they feel sick. So what about instead of a bin? Is carbon monoxide bad for you if you physically eat it rather than breathing in? I reckon, yeah.

I'm no doctor. I reckon if you eat carbon monoxide, that's fine. Okay, okay, okay, well, you know, hey, we've got some cars, we've got some chicken. Yeah. So, look, hey, I like this Ben idea. Yeah. I think you're thinking too small. Oh, okay.

What are we think about a big bin? The tip. The tip! Oh, living in the tip's actually... Because people throw out all kinds of cool shit, dude. Yeah. And there's no security at the tip. I mean, it's probably heaps the security.

Yeah. For that exact reason, I would imagine. Also, it's really easy to get killed at the tip. Yeah, I get crushed into a little cube. Yeah. My family wondering where I am. Versacled. Yeah.

Well, Roofman has to, like, immediately loses his family. He breaks out of prison. They're like, fuck you. And he's like, well, you family time. Where was Roofman shitting? Probably the toilet. Oh, yeah. because we're worried about security

but I will say in Roofman he figures out how to turn off the security monitors so he has free reign of the location So basically the way that Roofman figures it out is he breaks into the Toys of Ross roof and then he spends like a day in the roof just watching

because there's vents in the roof he can like see into the office so he looks at where they can and because he's really good at observing he can see the security camera monitor so he sees where the cameras are. And he's watching that for a bit. And then he figures out where they're pointing. And then he tries to avoid that. But he can't reach the food or the bathrooms without going

past the camera. But then he realizes it because Toys Ross are like, whatever, like, who's going to break into the office? They've just got the guide and the password to the cameras written next to the cameras. So then he just jumps down into that and then turns the cameras off. Clever. Clever. So if we can turn off. And then he's showering and stuff in. Yeah. If we can turn off the security... Oh, yeah. Then I'm going back to... I'm going back to the museum, frankly, if we can turn off security.

A 24-hour gym. Oh, good choice. You should probably do that. Look, the food's going to be a hassle. I understand this. But, again, because of cash, right? But I reckon, how long can you survive off only protein shakes? Because if we can get, like, if you're maybe stealing the protein, like, you steal someone's protein powder,

or sometimes, actually, behind the counter, they'll just have loose protein like those giant That's true. That's smart. That'll lost you. And if you can just like ration that out Yeah. It's 24 hours. So like, you know, it doesn't, you know,

you don't have to live in the roof, right? Because it's 24 hours. You can just live in the gym. You can just live in the gym. And gym has bathrooms. Yeah. And showers. You could pretty much, what you would do

to avoid suspicion without even disabling cameras and whatever. Yeah. You would pretty much just like sleep in the... They are going to see you there 24-7. Yeah. But you can go out. Well, this is maybe when you have to sleep in the roots or you have to leave and come back and, you know, like, I'm getting yoked.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Leave the gym, go to, find a gym that's 24 hours, near a McDonald's that's 24 hours. That's right, McDonald's. McDonald's. McDonald's. We're going down McDonald's. We're going to have a McDonald's. McDonald's.

Yeah, so McDonald's is 24 hours. I mean, the thing with Roofman is that he can't, like. You don't want to be seen. Yeah. Because the problem with going to... If you go to a gym, if you're a 24-hour one, it's like, oh, you have to go in and it's like, oh, you can't kill a man for the face or whatever. But yeah, you could probably get someone's like...

You could steal one. You could steal one that kind of resembles you. But sometimes there's staff and there's other people there that are going to be seeing you. You're not really... I mean, obviously, in the movie Roof Man, he does... But that's his downfall. Yeah. He meets people.

So you've got to do it in such a way where to do a pure Roof Man, you don't see anyone. Yeah. I think at a museum, underneath many museums are like a network of tunnels and old storage rooms. Jackson, you're a genius. Underneath. Sewers. The sewers live like Pennywise the clown. Yeah.

Eight children. Looking to my deadlines. The problem with living in the sewer is, and I feel like movies and fun times don't convey this, it is full of waste and therefore gas. Yes. You will get freaky. If you smoke a cigarette, you explode and die. And obviously, as the Roofman, you need to smoke. Although Roofman doesn't smoke cigarettes.

No, that's true. He's not smoking any, yeah, yeah, yeah. You can live in the sewers. You can live in the sewers, hide out, but food. Where are you getting food in the sewers? Unless you're eating rats and human shit. And that's not a good diet. That's nowhere on the food pyramid.

I feel like it's like, yeah, going in and going to the bins and scavenging. Getting really, really, really like, thinking, I'm thinking back to live it in a big bin again. Yeah, dude. Outside a, outside like a supermarket? Yes, dude. Yeah, like, eating a lot of receipts? No. Dumpster diving bins.

What about? Yeah. Like, again, because you could just be like, well, just be like homeless. Yeah. But you can't. Yeah. Well, people can look in the bin. You're roof man.

There's roof man in the bin. Roof man's bin man. Yeah. What about the aquarium? and I just eat the fish, no one's paying attention. What aquarium's 24 hours? Are you moving into the, like, I'm living in the roof of the aquarium.

Okay. I love the idea of you, like, taking the wrong turn, just falling into... Yeah, they find me dead in the turtle enclosure, and the turtles have been eating me. Oh, this is a good idea. These eyes and his balls. Zoo? Yeah, I mean, open.

It's like, yeah, it's open air. There's probably, like, heaps of places you could kind of secrete yourself in. If I'm doing, like, a roof man, where I'm observing a lot of stuff, lot of stuff. Yeah. Plus, like, you know, what are they feeding the orangutan? I reckon I could eat what an orangutan eat.

Arangetang chow, dude. How are you getting the orangutang? You have to, don't get in that close. I'll tell you apart. I know, I know, but like they have separate enclosures, right? Where it's like, well, like, you know, the orangutan, sorry, like, you know,

the orangutan go into your, the enclosure where everyone can look at you and then, you know, while the zookeepers and everything deal with the stuff behind there. And then maybe, at an opportune moment, I'll sneak in there, get some monkey. chair and go back in the roof. I live above the orangutan enclosure. That's funny

because people are going to be, come to look at the enclosure and all the orangutans are just looking up. They can span you in there and they're like pouring at the roof. They keep stealing my food. Because also I'm still in their food. Yeah, exactly. They're like, who do you sky? They hate me. You're up there. He's like, shut up. Stop looking at it. Because like, yeah, if I steal someone's sandwich, they'll

know I'm still in the sandwich. That orangutang, who's he dealt? Who's he fucking tell us. I love the idea of the Iranian tanks all standing in a circle looking up and people like, the orangutans have discovered the rapture. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They're going to go to help you. Shut up, you stupid time. I love you. Well, no, I was

going to say that I think you're falling for a trap here because the zoo is a rare instance. I think a museum is a little bit this, but more obviously so. The zoo is like low security, but also very high security. Yeah. Like, good luck getting into any of those fucking back areas. Getting into

an enclosure, easy. Yeah, yeah. Getting into the place where they keep the food, hard. because that's what they keep the good shit and there's studies and whatever. Also, like, those orangutans are clever and they're wearing the food. And also, like... Can I dress up and pretend I'm an orangutan?

I just love you, like, who's the orangutan gonna tell? And it's just that all the zookeepers are like, I don't know if you've noticed this. The orangutans are just pissed off. I think the orangutans have, like, lost a little bit of weight. Yeah, they seem to be...

They seem to be, you know... Also, what orangutan enclosure has a roof. Yeah, I know, it's a crazy zoo. Oh, it's the, it's the behind the, you know, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the internal part. Yeah, the internal part of the orangutan inclusion. I love, they're like, what's this bulge? And they're just poking it with the brooms. Yeah, yeah, near, near the, they love, they love when I poke this bulge in the room. I don't know why. The bulge makes weird noises, too. Oh, my belly is full of orangutan tank, yeah. I think an orangutan got loose and got up in the roof, maybe, count the orangutank. I do that they break your seminar and they're like, oh, yeah, it is. It's a lost orangutan. thing.

Yeah. They're incorrect. All the arachians are so pissed off with you. They're going to kill you. The moment the sun goes down, you're dead. It's like looking around they're just like looking at me pointing and waving at the

people coming to see you. I'm a silly orangutanagia. You're dead. I want to fucking kill you. The moment the sun sets you're dead meat. I'll tear your arms off. Also good at, you know, how similar is orangutan shit to humans?

and shit because they could be like, you know, it's a great way to be like, oh, these orangutans, well, you know, orangutang thing's shitting in the corner. I'm throwing my shit down in that corner. I've never taken a shit outside, just like bare outside on the ground before. Oh, you simply must. Yeah, I just feel like...

You got camping more, I guess. What's your fear of... Oh, no, no, no fears. I just like... It's like, just like... Went just talking about shitting outside. It just made me realize I've never done that. Yeah, I've shit and dropped toilets, but it is still a drop toilet.

Yeah, I would rather shit outside than in a... I imagine it I'd be shitting in the roof of the, the, uh, the, uh, behind the, the orangutan enclosure. Why the orangutang's looking up and why does it smell like shit? Yeah, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then hurling it into like, wherever the orangutangetang's a shit. Are you just trying to piss them off even more? Yeah. You can't get, although I love the zookeeper.

Yeah. Yeah, this is nuts. What the fuck is going to be eating orangutan chow? Oh. Oh. Yeah. You would just be taking orangutan shit. Yeah.

That's a lot. Train your asshole to only take out orangutang shit. Yeah, I think it's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. No one's going to suspect that. Staying in the zoo is not a bad choice. I think I've settled on, and I know I brought up a cinema before, I'm going to do a slight side step, but it's very similar vein. Yeah.

The drive-in. Oh, okay. Because a lot of, it's open air against. There's a bit of freedom, and security's not crazy. But there is often a building that you could climb into the roof of. Then, yeah, climbing to the roof. for the building and also because there's like a candy bar and stuff it means that there will be a I could go dumpster diving yeah yeah eat some of that free popcorn and also because

it's a drive-in they often have um not just like you know your popcorn and your candy but they have like hot dogs yeah hot dogs uh also bathrooms which is handy but also so I think that that the like the ability to take a shit and no one to notice me yeah high yeah you can take an overnight shit there No one's going to bat an eye Plus it's like during the day No one's really going to be there Because it's barely operation Yeah exactly

And I will say that also I mean The main issue with roof man Is like you can't just be seen But I feel like at the drive in Yeah if I see a guy Wandering around I'm not

But it's a lot of It's a lot of eyes on you Yeah But also they're in the car Entertainment Yeah exactly No but also They're in a car

They're there to see a movie They're not really paying attention So even though there is a lot of eyes on me. It's not really a lot of eyes on me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It'll be often dark. Scary, though, because, like, there was news reports about how I'm escaped convict. Yeah. So if anybody does see you, they will be afraid. No, but then also, there is a small, not 100% chance, but a small chance in the ads, they'll be like, by the way, Mary and keep an eye out for Roofman. Warning for Roofman County. If you see this man.

I'm like standing there eating popcorn out of the bin looking to the screen. Oh, fuck. Fuck, dude, I should have done anything to change by a beer. Why are I still wearing these convict clothes? I should have gotten out of my prison uniform. Yeah. I think I'm going to go, I'm going to end with the aquarium because I think it's really funny to just be eating the fish and the stuff that the aquarium's trying to look after.

Yeah. And they're like, why do we just keep finding bones? What's going on? And I'm scooping my hand in. And it's good for the brain, Omega 3. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're going to have beautiful skins. You can be so clever, genius.

Beautiful skin, clever. And imagine all those exotic fish how they must taste. Exactly, dude. Probably a lot similar, I reckon. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all raw fish. Yeah. Plus, there's a...

You know, raw, I mean, raw fish is... I think you're going to get really sick and maybe die. But those fish are, like, real taking care of them. And there's a cafeteria, too. So I do have... Okay, yeah, that's true. I do have access to non... Honestly, if I'm eating the raw fish in the aquarium, that's on me.

Yeah. A rousing suspicion. It is funny to imagine, like, I start. with like the small fish with like a big school they're not going to notice and then one day they're like we've got four sharks but one of them is missing that's suspicious and something smells like dead shark in the ceiling here what's going on there's a bulge in the ceiling again they're hitting it with a broom oh fuck my nuts oh i'm so full of shark me oh i feel so sick i should have stuck to being a roof, man, and not an eating a shark

man. And, you know, the aquarium's fun, so I've got entertainment too. They've got toilets and yeah, you can look through the roof and look at all the fish and go, damn, that's all fish. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I think, yeah, same thing for a zoo. I think it's also depending on which zoo. It's also a bit

more open, like, you know, a bit more open, and so you can probably get lost. Get your steps up. Get them steps up. And you're like, yeah, get lost a bit more than you say in an aquarium. Exactly. Yeah, some zoos are pretty big. Here's a question though, this is the risk we all run. Are we liable to fall in love?

At the drive-in, probably not. I feel like I'm going to fall in love with movies. Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. But you might fall in love with someone who is there who also love movies. Yeah, what if you see? No, no, no, no, but I'm safe because they're in car. Yeah, bro. It's like, what, 2004?

Yeah. Manic, Pixie Dream Girl. Oh, yeah. What a car. No, no. I'm not even going to see her. I'm going to see a piece of shit in 2004. They come out.

They have a fucking wireless radio. They sit down next to you. You're fucked. You're fucked, man. You fell in love. And they go, do you also, like, hate the confines of a car when you watch a movie at night? And you go, no, I'm the roof, man.

No, I love being in the roof, actually. Yeah, and they're like, oh, that's so quirky and romantic. Yeah, dude. You're falling in love. Zui dash and L, and then you're going away. Those bangs. How are we going to say no to the bags? I can resist those bags, dude.

Yeah. Then, you take quirky photos in like one of those little instant photo booths. Somebody looks at it when it comes out and they go, hang on a damn sick. That's the fucking roofman. That's the roof man. Wait, if I just dropped like the Sharpie, drawing a beard. Oh my God, roof man. I think I could fall in love in the aquarium, but I think my...

Most likely with a shark. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, me and you fall in that risk of I could fall in love with an orangutthangang thing and you could fall in love with the shark. Or a zookeeper and an aquarium keeper. What do you call that? I mean, Lee is a Toys Ross employee, so that's how that happens. It's for a customer. Yeah.

But I was thinking because I'm often going to be, like, in such a way where I'm above the tank. I won't really be able to distinguish anyone's features. What do you think what happened? You're above the fish tank of aquarium. So because it might, like, people piss in swimming pools. You just piss into that. Will that kill the fish, or do you reckon it's, like, filtered enough that that'd be fine? I think they'd be fine for a bit.

Or is it not filtered enough because they're trying to recreate. How? Well, do exotic fish go so exotic that you go from like very filtered, we've got to really maintain it to, don't touch the water, it has to be kept at this exact thing. Well, it depends what kind of aquarium is. This is like, yeah, the exotic, like, yeah. I'm thinking sea life to like a sea life. They would have a lot of like, yeah.

I think you'd be fine. I hope you get pissed in the tank. Yeah. I think that the people watching would be like, and you probably wouldn't even be. No, but it might not even be suspicious. You just go, oh, there's a lot of water moving around. There's a leak. There's some yellow water coming from the ceiling.

How dehydrated? I'm not quite shouldn't get it at all. I'm sure all of the fish are convudging on the air. And getting sick and dying. Yeah, if the fish drank my piss, which they might do because fish are just like what is. I think, again, that much water. Yeah. It's not much piss.

Yeah, it's fine. Yeah, it's not much piss. It's more about when you're, you know, hanging your ass out off the rafters and just dropping it into the big toilet. Believe me. So funny, but like the ceiling is just a bit. above the tank. And you're just like, oh, what fish is that? That's a strange. So I'm going to have seen that at me. Oh, it's a human. Oh, it's a human. Oh, it's thailand. Oh, it's take your shit. And now there's a bunch of fish. It's just floating. Oh, he's sinking down.

Just like, then, smash cut you, I've been caught. The police are taking me out. And I got a big sea bass coming out of my ar's hole. You're going to be careful of like eel. I want to swim up there. Neil won't help me. Tell me back to jail. Yeah. I like the idea of like... Okay. I fall in love with someone going to the movies.

Yeah. I fall in love with the zookeeper and you get the same madness that sailors got and you fuck a sea lion. Yeah. Like, oh my God, there's mermaid. She's so beautiful. There's mermaids at this aquarium. Wow, I was just trying to like hide out for six money. I think I'd fall in love with a mermaid.

That's so crazy. Listen to Osir and Saur and Sarn. Damn, I love you too, mermaid. I should, I should, I would go to jail for you, Mermaid. then I fall out of the roof into the water. It's truly one of the worst things those families see as I fall out of the roof

and drown trying to have sex with the sea lion. Help me, Merman, help me. But you see me get down there begin trying to kiss the sea lion realize the danger of my situation and then I just can't get out.

But your pants are still around your ankle to you're trying to swing, yeah. Oh, what? Slamming on the glass. And then as you drown. Just a drow to obviously do a fart and some shit So the water just gets Yeah

And then the eel goes up Yeah yeah And they go And that brings you back to life Because it electrocutes me It was an electric eel The idea of going But underwaters

Still The eel pokes out of your mouth The eel when starts It starts controlling The glass smashes I smash out into the middle Fish dying Take me away

Yeah, I miss jail now And they go, who are you? And I go, I'm no one I'm still kind of trying to keep my secret identity I'm not the roof man I'm John the eel I'm John Fish You have a nice days, you waddle out

Yeah, yeah Did an eel go fully through that man? And I turn around Yes I'm going to the bathroom To make sure everything's okay It will not be I have many internal sphincters do not exist anymore.

I feel fine, but surely that can't be the taste. I just give him a thumbs up. I think I'm in trouble. I'm not long for the world. And he'll went through me. That is correct. It's been a pleasure. And it all went through me.

I'm about to die. Have a good day. Have a good day. Enjoy the aquarium. I hear the sea lions. I thought it was a moment, but now I understand. You know, in pre-death clarity, I noticed that I instead made love to a beautiful sea line. Yeah, but I thought it was a mermaid.

I was incorrect. And now he'll run through me, and I'm definitely going to die. Probably in five minutes. Five, maybe ten minutes. Yeah, I am. I robbed 40 McDonald's too. I'm the roofman. I don't know if you know.

But it all seems paltry in comparison. I'm very observant, but I did not see this coming. Did see this coming. Enjoy the aquarium. Enjoy the aquarium. Have a lovely day. You just explode There was another eel flopper

There was another eel in it There was more than one eel So man was more eel than man In that way Wow Wow I hope I get free aquarium tickets out of this A lifetime bars or something

The greatest I can do is buy one, get one free Yeah I'll take it I guess Yeah thanks Sweat me to a drain. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They feed me to the piranus. Yeah. Probably the move.

Yeah. Well, I think that we all successfully roof mend. Yeah. I believe we did. And on that note, I've been Joe. I've been Jackson. I've also been Joe. Hey, I was just going to say if they want to support us.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're interested in supporting this. Please, do fill them in on this. If you go, hey, I loved that when the eel going through Jackson Rift, that made me want to support those boys and what they do. You can sign up to the bad brain boys. Well, you'll first of all be supporting. but you'll also gain access to a bunch of bonus content that's cool.

You get a bonus episode of Plumming the Death Style once a month. The regular schlubs don't get. You're like, what if once a month? Exactly, dude. Jackson Bailey Spooks America, a little spooky show that you do twice month. And if you're in like someone's roof, you can just take out your headphones. You can play Jackson Bailey Spooks America a little bit loud to scare whoever it is that lives there. They can leave and you can live there a little bit of a little.

house. We did a Jackson Bailey Spooks America on people living in people's houses. And we were like, oh, wow, this one case is fucked up. And then we kept reading and be like, oh, my God, it happens all the time. It's so common. It was very scary. Plus, you get access to the Discord, discounts on live show tickets, and a bunch of

other stuff. So, hey, when you're talking to the Discord, you can be like, you could let us know how you would roof man. Yeah, exactly. We'd love to know what your roofman strategy would be. Yeah. Links in the show notes, hey, please support us. Hey. Yeah. Have a wonderful afternoon. yeah yeah exactly i hope you have a lovely day evening or morning or whatever the

yeah lovely night yeah you drift off to sleep if you listen to this first thing in the morning jesus christ what a way to start your day morning coffee and toast plumbing to that star i guess like i'd call in sick yeah hey i'll listen to a really bad thing i caught on me yeah look hey you're on the you're on the tube yeah listening to this on to your morning commute and you just have like an expression on your face of like oh no you listen to it on the tube and you go, hmm, I should steal this train. Yeah, yeah. Live on the tube.

Yes, okay. We're accidentally going to start roofman to tube man. So we've got to go, but enjoy. Goodbye. I enjoy, enjoy the rest of your day. The bad part's over now. It's only up for me, you know. Thank you.

Thank you.