Plumbing the Death Star - Which Minecraft Mob Would Make The Best Step Son?

Episode Date: September 21, 2025

Don't listen to this with your step dad because it might get real awkward. Also, Johnny Baby is eating the walls.Links to everything at https://linktr.ee/plumbingthedeathstar including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey everyone, and welcome to this week's episode of Plumbing the Death Star. I'm Joel. I'm Jackson. And I'm also Joel. Plumbing the Death Star is a comedy pop culture podcast that are the important questions. And here's a red-hot one that's been searing into your mind. What are they going to answer? My pain receptors are on fire.

What are they going to answer? I'm hurt. I'm scared. That's you. Yeah, yeah, that's you. Because you've read the topic and you're like, thank Christ, finally. Because we're answering the question, which Minecraft mob, would make the best steps.

Now, obviously, Minecraft, everybody's played it. It's a beautiful game. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Steve from Minecraft chicken jockey. Oh, yeah. Jack Black. Yeah, you know Jack Black. Justice Smith? Justice Smith, you know Justice Smith.

Um, Jason Mamoa. I know Jason Mamoa. I was like, Aquaman, oh, Aquaman. Is Justice Smith a name or a creature? Oh, he's a name. He's a guy. He's around. He's the son of Detective Pikachu.

Spoiless for Detective Pikachu. We saw Detective Pikachu in LA. Oh, you're a jetlight. No, I remember Ryan Reynolds. Yeah, Ryan Reynolds. Yeah, Justice Smith is his son. Yeah. Pikachu's dad, but also the son of Pikachu.

Oh, no. Oh, a Nepo actor. Pikachu's dad, yeah. No, he's not a... He's Pikachu. But Dusha said... Dusha said he was Pikachu's dad. Yeah, because in the same way that, like, your pet, you're like, oh...

Oh, like, if I had a grimer, I'd say, this is my son. Yeah. And then when people started attacking him in a Pokemon fight, I'd say, well, you do... That's my boy. He plays Simon. Don't hit my boy. Why are you being so rude to my son alone? It's so funny, because you've seen a few of...

Okay, so first of all, Justice Smith, shoutouts. Yeah, shoutouts because he's in Ron's Gone Wrong. A beautiful titled film. But he is also one of the main characters in the Dungeons and Dragons movie. Is he? Who he? Who he plays? He plays Simon. Who that?

Who fuck Simon? The half-alph wild magic sorcerer. That the big loser guy? Yes, I think so. He's a descendant of a notable wizard. I don't remember much. I think I'm getting it confused with the world of Warcraft movie, i.e. Warcraft, a movie. To be the descendant of a notable wizard. Wow.

Simon. Not Chris Pine. No, not Chris Pine, not Michelle Rodriguez. The other one. There's another one to coast off that notable wizard's name, my whole life. Going into the tavern and being like, hey, how are you doing? Yeah, I'm Jackson the Wise. Yeah, my great granddad's Balfa's otherwise. That's right. Well, he's a descendant of Elmister.

Oh, yeah. Elmister. Elmister Orma? Orma? Yeah. He's a character from the Forgotten Realms campaign. At the tavern being like, hey, you heard of Elfminster, Warmore? Yeah, I remember what I've heard of Elmister.

He's my dad. You guys are meant to be D&D, guys. What's become of you? Well, like, I mean, he just plays D&D. He doesn't really know much of the more. He's got me there. Alamister, yes. He's a guy, a big famous wizard.

I want to say in Boulder's Gate 3, the man whom have to make feed shoes Gail is maybe related to Al my stuff You have to feed him shoes Yeah, yeah He's one of the current chosen

Of the goddess mistra Mistra, yeah Gail or Al Mister Al Mister That would be another good thing To try and coat stuff And get free drinks Well because

Gail, because he's the guy You've got to feed magic items to Right Unless he goes to Or he's a bomb Oh, you've told me about this man And like some of the early stuff You get his magic shoes

Oh, so you've got to make him eat the shoes. That's awesome. But, like, he got that way because he was banging Mistra. Oh, tight. Yeah. And then he's like, I know what I can do. I can do something for like, hey, Mr. I'm going to help you out. I'm going to do this thing you didn't ask me for or want.

And oh, no, it's bad. And now I'm being punished. Justice Smith. Justice Smith. Oh, that's how we got here. I'm going to have to look this guy up. Well, I mean, this weren't help you. I must want to get a face.

I'm still fantasizing about being. being the descendant of a notable wizard. Yeah, dude. That'd be wonderful, because you'd be like, oh, yeah, hey, you know that notable wizard? Maybe you should hire me to do a thing. Yeah, exactly. Or just pay me. You can use my name for likeness.

Yeah, while I'm, like, applying for a job at the, like, the bank. The, the horse, the bank, yeah. The horse bank. The horse spurn bank. As I'm applying for a job, yes, and, as I'm applying for a job at the horse sperm bank in a fantasy setting, I say, hey, I don't know if it's relevant,

um, but I just happen to be the descendant of a notable wizard. Will that help you store horse come or jack off horses? I mean, I guess you can use magia. Yeah. And they say, are you magically inclined? I say, we're not really, but, you know, I could try. I can try and do spells on the horse's penis. And they go, we'll get back to you. We'll call you. Fireball. I'm sorry, I burched the horse's knob. Is that a thing that going to affect this in any way? I burnt the sperm as it came out. Is it bad? You can still use cooked sperm, right?

Going up to my boss and putting that a bucket of cooked sperm. Is this an egg? Mm-mm. No, this is just cooked sperm. Can you use it? No. It still is better as a solid, I thought. Right?

I set the horse's penis on fire. It was intentional. Yeah, it was intentional. Yeah, it was intentional. First off, okay, I need to, first off, that I won't. Secondly, sperm comes from the testicles. Oh, I've got to put the balls Gotta cook the balls

And then the other guy's jerking off horses Are like, you know, really got that job Because he's a deceptive of a powerful wizard I hate working with this guy Love the job, though Love the job, love what I do Love what you do and you'll never work a day in your life Yeah, and if you love jerking off horses

The horse sperm bank is the job for you That's really not a job, bro Like, not the banks outside of business People like, you know, for like, you know, race horses Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah It's crazy we just fall on through eugenics to horses

and dogs. Yeah, dude. I mean, like, people respect to the farmers and fair enough or whatever, crops are important. Yeah, got to eat rice. Farmers are out here jacking off horses.

Not even just farmers. If you own like a... Fingering cows. Yeah, dude. Fingering the cows. Yes. They're tweaking their nipples or whatever. Oh, sorry, not fingering, fisting

the cows. If you go to the... Whole arm in the cows. Isn't that to... to see if there's, like, to touch the foal's head or whatever? Yeah. Wait, is a baby cow called a foal? No.

It's got a cough, brother. Learn the farm. Yeah, dude. You would never last a day jacket on the horse or fisting a cow. I guess I'm too busy fissing the horse. This is the foal, yeah? That's the guy. He's got him from the...

Right off the horse's asshole. We got him from the horse fisted department. The horse fissing back. He's... We're fisting cows for you, sorry, buddy. He got the job because he's a son of golf. Whitlam. Yeah, yeah.

Australia's famous wizard. He was also PM for a bit. Yeah, dude, he's the money thing. You tell me Gough. His name's Gough and he's not a wizard. Yeah, that's a wizard's name for sure, dude. Gough Whitlam. What a spell?

Gough Whitlam! Yeah, that's true. Was Gough a nickname? Gough Whitlam also good. No, his name's Gough. No, his name's Gough. No, his name's Gough. Edward Whitlam.

Where's Gough? Where's Gough? It's his middle name. Edward Gough Whitlam. So Gough isn't short for anything else? It wasn't a nickname? It wasn't just like, my name is Edward. I go by goth.

God, I love this man even more. That's awesome, dude. Edward Goss. Just to have the confidence to pull that off. Can I, hey, call me Gough. Hey, what if I was like, oh, yeah, my name is Luke. Yeah, right? Yeah, my name is Luke's a normal name.

I don't think I have the confidence. I don't have the confidence personally to pull that off. Yeah. And that's a regular ass name. Yeah. God's like, hey, call me Ronald. Yeah. Yeah.

Call me Lindsay. Hey, just call me Lindsay. My name's Jackson, but call me Lindsay. Or if you each of you just have, I'm Lindsay, and then we find it later that it's all you're... You can pull off Lindsay. That's fine. Could I pull up Ronald? Yeah.

Yeah. But like, like, just to fall back, I'm like, you know, how my name is Luke. And I don't know, I just don't personally feel like I could have ever done that in my life. To pull off. Well, because what's weird is to be like your name is Luke. Because Luke and Joel are really basic name. Whoa. Come on.

Sorry, bro. They're basic. They're brosick, too. Yeah, well, he's a son of a jack. Yeah. And. You know what I was, dude? I'm not talking jacking off foot.

Just saying. Are you implying that I came from my dad, jacking off. You come from a long line of jerk-offs. Oh, I see. Yeah, yeah. I don't know if this is relevant, but my dad's a notable masturbator. I'll help we get the job That probably would at the horse spoon back

Yeah Well I guess Well you know Maybe that's like you know Bread through the line of humans Yeah exactly Exactly Yeah well I don't

You know just letting you guys know If we're doing a horse eugenics Why not? Yeah Well but also with Jack and off horses Yeah You don't even have to be a farmer Like if you own a race horse

Yeah You got to clean its knob I see I fucking That's like That's life dude You own Obviously the fantasy Of owning a horse

Is appealing Well didn't you have Did I own a horse? No, no, no. I did not own a horse. Weren't you dog sitting for a dog you had to jack off a finger or something? No, I knew a person who

they had to like dog sit this wonderful dog whom I love, which is now dead, thank God. Thank goodness, sir. It's lovely name, I think it was Gidgett. I love this dog so much. It was the worst dog. It was like... This is a dog I'm thinking of too

that we both, yeah, it was a horrible. Oh no, Gidgett's the French Bulldog. Yeah, it was a French bulldog that I met. And I need to, I think that's right, I'm remembering this now. There was, it's a friend that it was also being dogs. It was a sausage dog. A notable dog. Yeah.

That dog, let me tell you, I forget about that dog. So I'm like, I don't even know that dog's name. But Gidgett? Because Gidgett, I was like, oh my God, what an old dog? And they're like, it's three. I'm like, Jesus Christ. It cannot be three. That's awesome.

There's like, yeah, because like, it had like giant nipples. And I was like, surely. Oh, because, you know, maybe it's like... It's been, like, bread, so it's like an ex-breeding dog or something like that, like a rescue where you're like, you know, taking it from a... No, nipples just like that, real inflamed. It would drag itself on the carpet to scratch, and you're like, oh, that's pretty bad. It's like, yeah, it's got real bad skin problems.

Like, oh, yeah, yeah, it's real bad. It's, like, got a very, very dry vulva. Oh, that's it now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You have to, like, basically cream and finger this dog daily. Not your dog, you should. say of friends. Wow, you are the... Daily is crazy.

You're incredible friends, may I just say. To be like, oh, what's the time? Oh, I'm going to go finger my dog? Also, yeah, if it got too hot, it would basically shut down. Oh, that's awesome. Oh, man. Don't get a French... There was a fresh bulldog I was reading about named Finney McNuckle. It was so wrong

that it had to eat in a crate because... I love you, it ate so messily because his head was so wrong, but you had to put a crate on top of it for a to eat. And of course you're naming that dog, Fini McNock. Yeah. Or God's cruelest joke would be my name for it. Also, it had kind of like human ass cheeks. It was the weirdest dog because it had its like tail docked. But like, because I was like, oh, you know, people still eat a dog. That was kind of thing. I was like, oh, no, no, no. It wasn't for like, you know,

aesthetic reasons. It was like a surgery. They had to go in. Like, it had to remove its tail. But like, because we used to have corgis growing up and then we docked at a certain length. but this had to like it had no tail but further in so it looked like it had human butt cheeks. That's awesome. But I would say that fingering a dog daily is probably better than like weekly or monthly. Yeah.

Because I feel, okay, my working is simply in all three of those scenarios, you're fingering a dog. Yeah. If it's monthly, you're dreading that day. It never becomes normal. I guess if you're fingering the dog every day, you're not thinking about it.

Yeah, by after like day six, you're just like whatever. No, see, because monthly, with monthly, I can at least go to a vet. Yeah, true. And at the point, I'm like, I'll pay a vet to finger my dog. You know what?

Okay, weekly's probably worse, though. Weekly is too often. It's too expensive. It's too expensive to go to a vet. But it's not like you're just like, Jesus Christ, Wednesday's coming up. It's my dog fingering day. And your dog looking at you and you go, you stop smiling. Stop. I know you're dry.

I know you're dry enough. You're the driest dog in the world. You and your human ass cheeks. fucking dog. Oh, fuck, that's funny. And sometimes human ass cheeks on a dog could be funny. Like, back, you know,

our friend back over at Chupital Studios. Yeah. Gizmo. Gizmo. Gizmo's good human ass cheeks and it's hilarious. I've never looked at that dog's ass. Next time you're at Stupid Old Studios,

sorry, at Humdinger Studios, you should have a gaze at the dog's ass and be like, that's a human ass. It makes me laugh every time. How'd you first notice it? I think somebody else pointed it out to it. Oh, good save. Good save.

Yeah, yeah. It wasn't even. And now you're continuing the tradition, because now if I mention it, I can be like, yeah, Jackson told me, but someone else told Jackson. Now let's think who I can throw under the bus who told me. Mark Banana. Mark Banana said it to me. He nudged me and he said, hey, Jackson. Look at this dog.

What's that Mark from Artie Donna? He said, that dog's going to give him on his cheeks. I've been looking at this dog's asshole for ages. Is that so Mark Vanano from Arnda Dona? And it's got the ass cheeks of a human being. Yeah. Goodness me, you're right, Mark Vanano, Vermont. Thank you so much for pointing that.

out. I would never have looked myself. Me personally, I'm not looking. That's why I do gamey, gamingy game. Okay, Minecraft. Oh, yeah, right. Right, right, right. So, okay. There are many enemies in Minecraft known as mobs. Obviously, we don't have the fucking time

to talk about every single one. So if you're a big Zoglin head or maybe. You're a shit out of luck, buddy. Or maybe you're a big Vindicator fan. Yeah. Or like, you're like a roll Vindiesel. Or you're really like cheering

Or you're really cheering on for a bogged A bogged Bogged, yeah Bogged Bogged, Borged Okay, so they are called bogged I know, I got that So if you've got one, it would be a bogged

Yeah, I got that I got that Anyway, if you're a big fan of those guys Unfortunately, we That's, we just did that section Yeah, they're not coming up again I know you're like But Joel, the bogged be the best episode because they're...

It's a wet zombie? I think I'm remembering the bog. They're a zombie in the swamp biome. If I was going to have a zombie son, I would want him dry, frankly. I don't want a wet little boy. Yeah. That's why we invented tails. Yeah. Also, I feel like a wet zombie,

like it's just going to become more and more like a waterlogged. Yeah, bloated. Blooded is the word. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that's, I feel that's going to smell more than a dry zombie. Yeah, exactly. And if the Although the war, I mean, if we just put it in the pool and let it sit there, well, that still smell as bad as, say, a regular zombie.

Well, yeah, but now it's its pool, but like a regular zombie in the hot, hot Australian sun, I feel that's going to, A, dry out and be stinky until it gets real dry, then maybe not. Okay. Coming around. I don't know which one is, like, going to be better or worse than the smell factor. Do you remember that, just speaking about bloated dead bodies? Of course. Awesome.

Do you remember that image that went around? some stoutes. Yep. You know, and I say like, yeah, 2016, 2015 of a sloth that had fallen into a lake and then it'd become really bloated and hairless and everyone thought it was a monster

but it was just a sloth that had drowned. I was like, I hope I... Yeah, yeah, this is ringing bell. I don't remember this. It's crazy. It looks crazy. Like, it was one of those like, oh my God, we once again have found the Chupacabra. Yeah.

Oh my God, it's not a Chupacabra. It's a sloth. It's a drowned sloth. Oh, my God. We found a chippicabra. But no, once again, it's a raccoon that fell on the ocean and lost hair and got bloated. It does look crazy. Yeah. But anyway, you know, if we had a zombie son and he fell in the pool, he'd be bald.

Yeah, well, yeah, save money on a haircut. Yeah, exactly. Well, would a bogged boy, if you put them in the pool, would you wash the bog off them? Or would that make them more bogged? Are they soggy or are they dirty? Depends how clean your pool is. And how foreign aid is. Eventually, it won't be.

Yeah. I think that's a bad use of our pool. Oh, yeah. I like finding out in this scenario. we have a pool. Time to neglect my son and go swimming. Are you a swimming guy, though? I like being in the pool.

Yeah, it's like a lounging pool guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like playing with pool noodles. Yeah, that's fun. That makes sense. Donk and, you know. Yeah. Do you ride, you're like riding on like a pool floaty thing, what do you call it, like a lillo?

Yeah, yeah. And just having a bit of a drink and just like splashing occasionally your hand and you like splash of the cold water in your whole belly. That's good. This could be controversial. Yeah. really don't like a lounging in a pool like that. Really? Either put me in the pool or take me out of the pool.

Don't put me in like a... You're not a Lilo guy. I'm not a... I can see that for you. What about a donut guy? Yeah. As in like the big inflatable donut. But we're all donut. We all love a donut. Yeah. I went to a real big donut phase

recently. I had to really fight back against it because any time I was craving anything like slightly sweet. I was like, I should get a donut. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then there was like a five or six day period where I was like, I've had a donut every day. That needs to stop. I miss the era where when you were late, you would get

a six pack of donuts for everyone. That was good. Yeah, it was good. Yeah, it's like an apology I'm so late. Also, I'm later because I spent time getting the six pack of... But whatever, we go cable to donuts. We're like, oh, fuck you. We got, don't you be as late as you like. Now I'm rarely late and even more rarely have

donuts. So yeah, what about like, yeah, donut? So it's like you can't loud, but you're also in the world. No, I think it's because, like, I don't like because usually if I'm in the pool it's a really, like, it's a hot day. Yeah. So, like, if my ass is in the water,

a la donut, I'm just getting really hot, but cold ass. Well, not even cold. Like, the cold isn't the, it's just... I'm just like, what are we doing here? Maybe, like, a, like, sort of a donut situation where you can kind of go into the water a little bit, but add the water a little bit.

Like, with an umbrella, you can kind of, like, put it on top of it, whatever. So you got some shade. Yeah, yeah. And then, like, maybe, like, a place for a drink and a place for a plate. so I can have like a hot dog in the pool. Oh my God, hot dog in the pool.

Isn't that exactly what the Prime Minister in that Simpsons episode about Australia has rocking? Yeah, it's pretty close. They got like a tire thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they have a little umbrella. I think they've got a little umbrella.

Yes. And I think they get a fosters in a smaller ring. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think for me in the pool, I like going in the pool and mucking about. And then if I'm going to relax. You're a handstand in the pool, go. Yeah, yeah, and then see how long underwater I can go.

Oh, yeah. See how they're here. Watch me hold my breath. No one cares, but we're down there. Yeah, yeah, and I can't hold my breath for long. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's not impressive. But then getting out of the pool, drying under it with a, you know, a towel lying on a deck chair, dry, then I get dry back in the pool.

And they get really tuck it out. Yeah, you know. I like reading a book, yeah, or like reading a book by the pool. By the pool, feet in the pool. That's really good. And after, because I'm so tired, hot chippies. Yeah, or how good is a sandwich after the, being in the pool, dude? Like a triangle of like a tiny, tiny, tree.

triangle like ham and cheese. Yes. I think my perfect post pool food for me is either fish and chips or a pizza. Yeah. Hot dog, a sausage roll or just like sausage and bread? Yes. See, pizza to me too much. That's too much.

You could like fish and chips though? Yeah, fish and chips is classic, dude. God, fish and chips is awesome. Fish and chips is so good. Fish and chips by the beach, dude. But not on the beach. I'm glad Australia invented them and not some fuckhead country like England. Yeah, me too, dude.

Me too. Um, yeah, I don't know. Yeah. I think like... Well, you don't strike me as a pool guy. Yeah, I like being in a pool. Yeah, but you don't like... I don't know. You don't have pool energy.

Yeah, I don't think you go... I'll take that. Yeah. Yeah, Jackson has many different and strange energy. Yeah, like, oh, I like to jump. Yeah, jumping's fun, dude. No, it's harder. The older you get, the more dangerous jumping becomes.

Yeah, it's worse than your joints. I remember you're telling, like, a story that was... You had framed as just like, you know, like, a relatable, so. circumstance. I think the story was like, yeah, this guy was being real weird to me at the train station. All I was doing was listening to music and just jumping on the spot. Yeah. I was just getting into the song. Just jumping, dude. Nothing wrong with jumping. Yeah.

Um, no, I like, I like the pool, but I think if I had to pick, rather than sitting on something in the pool, I would prefer to sit on like, you know how like a lot of pools and backyards have like a step or something? Yeah, yeah, yeah, like a shallower kind of. Sit on that, so I'm like mostly submerged, but still food and drinks are readily available. Kind of, like, edge of the pool. Yeah. Yeah. See, I get in, like, a thong, Australian thong. Yeah. Like, you know, you put, like, a drink on that, or you put, like, a bit of cheepees, and you're sent to someone's away.

Oh. Got to have a pool. Cold lemonade as well in the pool on a hot day. A can of drink in the pool goes hard. Hell, dude. God, man, I can see why people get a pool. Yeah, dude. But it's the greatest trick.

Yeah, dude. Because you won't use it. You're never going to use it. You're never going to use it. Upkeep is also a pain in the eye. 100% right so growing up my like my brother had a friend and they had a pool oh that's ideal you want a friend to have a pool yeah they also had a turtle oh no so yeah and so every time we're over there occasionally like yeah yeah get the

i think it was a turtle tortoise whatever one you can get in australia i think it's a turtle yeah and then he would just yeah put it in the pool and you'd watch the turtle swim from one end to the other and get out and then be like oh cute whatever and now in my older years being like oh it's so It's so much chlorine. Yeah, I know. You're fucking up that turtle's day so bad. You shouldn't do that to a turtle. Unless.

But it was cool to watch. Yeah. Oh, you can swim with a turtle? Yeah, dude, that's a dream. It was a little, little turtle. I swam with a turtle of like a hot spring once. That was pretty cool. Yeah, dude.

Yeah. You know that, it's been in hot springs. You know that, like, I think it's in Japan. Yeah. Where you got those monkeys. They didn't, like, you do the snow, whatever. And it's like a hot spring and you see the monkeys love in the hot springs. God.

I would love to be in there, but I know that that would stink. It's full of monkey shit, yeah. Monkeys aren't getting out of the spring to take a shit. I don't know, though, but they might be, though. No, they're not. They're not. I remember reading about this. I was like, maybe monkeys are clean.

No, monkey don't give a fuck, dude. Monkey is swimming in the Bahamas, those little pigs. Yeah, dude. I'm like, that'd be great, but I feel those pigs. They're shitting too. They're shitting in the ocean. No doubt, dude. I watched a video of a bunch of guys on horses,

and they were going like through like this I guess the beach and the horses were like submerged up to their flights and it was from the perspective of so there were like three horses in front of them and then two of the horses in front of them took huge shits and then they were like no no no no no as the shits just went around the horse and like

their legs were like in the water and they're just horse shit kind of just brown disgusting what is very funny steer steer move oh what are you going to do how often you browse on the internet and just watching fucked up videos because it sounds like every day Off. Yeah. It just comes across my feet. Yeah. That just happens, man.

Comes to your dash. You're like, oh, man gets shit on by a horse. Oh, okay, interesting. Watch. Yeah, yeah. Watch, like, like, subscribe. Are you, these, like, Reddit, or you find them on YouTube? This would be... It's just like... I want to say Instagram.

Yeah, like Instagram Reels. Oh, yeah, I forgot about your... I'm a Reels guy. Yeah, I forgot you were a Reels guy. Yeah. Reels are good. Yeah. You get everything the TikTok got way later? Oh, yeah.

That's nice. That's good stuff. Yeah. Anyway, so, again, Apologies to the Bog Teds. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I guess let's start. We'll just go through a couple.

We'll figure out if there'd be a good son, how it'd raise them. Okay, so it's my three-dad situation. Yeah. We're getting a step-son. How are we grading these sons of ours? How much we love them. Okay.

How much we love? On a scale of one to five. Okay, so quantifying our love, that's nice. So our love is conditional. Yeah, truly it is. And also, I guess, what are those conditions? What are we wanting from these? Just like a good son.

Yeah, like a good son that's like, you know. Good to be around. Yeah, doesn't have bad vibes. Okay, we're looking. Vives? We'll get three. Vibes. Doesn't embarrass me.

Or, yeah, vibes. It doesn't embarrass me. And how about, we'll look after us in our old age. Yeah, that's important, dude. That's important. Steps, that's a rough role for a stepson. Yeah, well, I'm his new fucking dad, dude. Look after me, bitch.

I've adopted him, I assume. Yeah. Like, or married his hot mom. I don't know right now. Either way, it's going to be like... Wipe your hands. That's funny to say, as a... I know you are a stepson.

None of my business. That's where the real kids step up. No, no, no, no. The step kids go home. See, yeah, exactly. I might not be the kid's biological dad, but I'm definitely the dad that stepped up. I took after step son.

That's sunned up. I'm the son that stepped off. So, yeah, so I feel like, you know, I've got to earn, you know, love and respect. Well, let's start in the obvious place. Zombie. Zombie. Okay. Okay, so they go, if you kill them, you get right and flush, which you can eat, but it will make you sick.

Yep. They do come in a small sun's size. Yeah, that's true. Baby jockey. Baby jockey, baby zombie, sorry. Baby jockey. As a zombie, I guess they'll never grow up. Yeah, so looking after us when we're always going to suck.

Yeah. Well, are we getting a baby zombie? No, we just get a zombie zombie. Get a zombie zombie. Okay. Well, okay, so it doesn't appear to be sentient. And it wants the hood on. We will find... It feels like we're owning a very vicious dog. Kind of like that movie Fido with Billy Connolly.

Okay. Not the reference I would have gone with. It's a big dog movie. Yeah, well, and Carrie Ann Moss. Oh, okay. Is that a movie where Billy... Billy Conley is a zombie And he has like little

Shot collar on or whatever With tame zombies And this is a boy in a dog movie But the dog just happens to be a zombie That's crazy I've never heard this movie in my life That's wonderful Makes sense

Okay Well let's go through Sort of vibes Yeah Bad vibes Stinky vibes I feel Like rotting flesh If we're keeping the 1 to 5 rating

The vibes of the zombie This could be controversial But I'm gonna give it like a two Okay It is a guy Yeah, yeah. So that's, that helps. Yeah.

You could dapp up a zombie if you want to. Put a zombie in a suit, yeah. Yeah, that's true. You could... They do wear clothes in Minecraft. Yeah, yeah. His vibes are pushing, starting to push a three all of a sudden. When we think of zombies, I'm thinking like, the walking dead.

I'm thinking those kind of are the zombies, right? Because they're like, oh, they've died and they're like their clothes are also rotting and falling apart. But this zombie, well, we can dress up. Yeah. So even though each is falling apart, wow, the clothes don't need to be. Zombie and Minecraft is dressed like Steve in Minecraft Which makes me think that zombie in our life

Will dress like us And every time I'll look at him I'll be reminded of my own mortality Vibs are going down to it too No but then my hammy downs Like I'm getting too fat You can wear this It could also be a vibe check on your outfit

Yeah that's true How zombie rocking your drip Oh so does it work like I get dressed in the morning And then I go check on my son And he's wearing the same clothes Yeah That's interesting Okay can I then take those clothes

And sell them Well, you can, in Minecraft, you can do that. You just have to kill the son. Okay, I don't want to kill my son. I feel like that defeats the purpose. Yeah. It will embarrass me. I think it's embarrassing to have a zombie son.

Yeah. It's embarrassing to have a zombie son that doesn't look after him. Well, it's embarrassing to have a zombie son that also dresses like me. Like, I'm dressing up like my... Look, you know, dressing up, like, your son or your daughter and, like, the same outfit as yourself can be very cute. Yeah. Right? For special occasions.

Yeah. Every day where you're just wearing, like, you know, you're kind of casual. clothes and like you're not doing it he's just naturally doing it it feels like you know as a stepson too weird yeah and then i like but is this a scenario where it's more embarrassing for my steps on or for me well but then that is embarrassing everyone's gonna think it's you though right yeah it's like i didn't do this because he's like zombie son he can't say nothing yeah he goes and they say mr bailey we need to have a meeting because your son keeps attacking the other children and also why does he keep dressing like you i don't know dude

Brother, can't help you. I was thinking the other days... I'm the dad who stepped off. And I think that's really funny to raise a curious kid by every time they have a question, you go, I don't know. Dad, why is the sky blue?

I don't know, dude. I don't know, dude. That won't make them curious. That'll do the opposite. No, that's what I mean. Yeah. I think it's just funny to act like you have no idea

how the world works. Well, do you know how the world works? Why is the sky blue? Reflections and from water or some shit. That's what people say... Probably the atmosphere. Light and, like, reflect... I guess also you...

Dad, what's going to happen to me when I grow up. I don't know. Probably, you get a job and die. I've got no idea. I have no clue. Tola, a bit wider. I don't know. We're going to prepare for all these questions when your son started. He's started to talk a little bit. Yeah, I know. I mean, he's not going to ask questions for a little bit. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I feel like, you know, I'm not going to do that. I don't know. But for the bit, it's funny. Yeah, it's funny to imagine.

Well, no, because like, I can't your kids, like, my dad doesn't know shit, but like, also when you're a kid, you assume your dad is like a fount of knowledge. Yeah, so you just be like, no one knows. I got no clue, man. No, but you can just Google shit. Well, I know. The thing is, a good tactic. Maybe, I don't know. Maybe I'll look into this later and they'll be like, that's a bad tactic.

It's like, well, I don't know. Give them a phone. Let's find out together. Oh, yeah, yeah. And then we find out together, either, you know, through some simple Googling or asking some of my, you know, smarter, more handsome friends. I reckon get scared and call the cops. Yeah. And then hand the kid the phone.

Guys, I've got, my son's got a question that I can't answer. My son's going crazy. I'm in danger. Speak to him. Why is that guy blue? We're heading over to the other. We're bringing guns, big ones. And we trace the call?

Yeah, right there. What about, I don't know, what are you reckon? And then when they say, I think it's this, and it'd be some nonsense,

you go, yeah, that's probably right. That's like, probably fucking on the money. Didn't you get raised wrong? Didn't you say someone? Yes,

dude, of course I got raised. No, I mean, obviously. What are you talking about? But wasn't there like something about it? No, I would mispronounce words

and my parents wouldn't correct me because they thought it was cute. Oh, Like a lot of, I think a lot of... I would say devour for years instead of devour. Yeah. And I thought Hermione's name from Harry Potter was pronounced Hermannor. I will say...

That's good. Well, I think it's funny because what it implies is that when my child brain read Hermione, because it's like an interesting collection of like letters and deep sounds or whatever, that my brain just was like, I don't know. I'm not even trying to read this normal style. Hermon. Hermon, that's a name. Move on.

I think it was until the first movie came out where I was like, oh, Hermione. That sounds wrong. Should be Ron, Harry, and Hormonore. Oh, no. Dear Christopher Columbus, I have some problems with your movie. What happened to Horm? Why did you change Hormonor's name? And Rom?

Where's Rome? Isn't it happy Rom and Hermannor? Who are these guys? Why did you make three new characters? Isn't that happy, Papa? I understand the idea of adaptations being like, you know, You've got to take some liberties, but this is too far. He's meant to be happy pop of Rom-Rombsley.

And Hermonor. No surname. No surname given. What the fuck? Dude, you rack this movie. I want a refund. Yeah. Give me my 12 bucks.

Yeah. Um, okay. That's who that made the sorcerer's stone adaptation for. Yeah, that would be good. With a herminaw re-added. Maybe in the new TV show. Yeah, that's true. Maybe I'll be lucky.

I'll add Hermanor back. Um, and then what about looking after us in our old age? They'll eat us. They'll eat us. They'll eat us. I've got it's down. Yeah, yeah. I've slipped. My back is out.

My hips are gone. Yeah. I'm an easy target. Mercy killing, though? Well, it depends how old I am. Yeah. 40. Yeah.

Oh, no, I'm close. We're all close. Yeah. But I am remarkably close. Forty's about the time you can start mercy killing us. Yeah, yeah. Shout out to listen to this podcast. Just a reminder that, yes, we are all.

getting to 40. Yes, dude. A grim reminder of our own mortality. These days, ah, there was a bit too cold and my joints, let me tell you, I'm like, oh, bit sore. Yeah, dude, what's that about? I went into the mountains on Saturday, up into the dandotons for like a little hike, and... Oh, yeah, of

course that hurt. It's the mountains. No, but it didn't really do... It was mostly going to cafes and looking in shops. Oh, okay, find anything good. But for like... No, not really. But for about an hour and a half, I did like an hour and a half hike down a mountain. Fucked me, dude. My inner thighs, my ass is sore.

Dude. Both cheeks. I don't know. What did I do? Man, like, even the wonderful thing of just banging these days, you're like, we got to get a pillow, we've got to get maybe a wedge or whatever. Because, quite frankly, if I'm in this position for too long, it hurts. But I'm not going to stop because it feel good, but I know I know tomorrow and like maybe directly, I need to stretch now. We're going to stop and do a downward doggle. Yeah. I just think that the sad thing is like during boning and more interesting positions. Yeah. There can be points where you're like, okay, the pleasure ratio and the

discomfort ratio are slowly getting to the, it's like I'm getting distracted from how awesome this year. Because I can feel I'm pulling a muscle. Oh yeah. How into the cramp do I have to leave this? Yeah. How long do I cramp for us to make this worth it? Can I can I stick it out often the answer is no I find the more spontaneous it is

there'll be like a brief period of time where you're like this is fine sexy and spontaneous and then you go we're in a weird position this has to become normal I'm sorry yeah yeah dude let's go normal style yeah we gotta do normal banging

there's like four classic positions for a reason yeah they work those are the everyone's something in the good terms and then you get to that point where you're like okay well you know well I've had a long day

you go on top my day's been long you go on Guess we're lying on our side. We just do nothing. Guess we're masturbating individually that. In different rooms. Not even mutually.

Not even together. No. At different points throughout the day, that's what our love life looks like now. That's beautiful. Hey, that's getting older kids. That's getting older. But that's okay. But our audience is also the same age as us.

Millennials only listen to podcasts. They know what's happening. They're all taking care of their doggos and they're adulting and they're putting on their funny little podcast of where going like, yeah, life's hard. Life's tough when you're nearly 40. Sucking, why, yeah, one day I'll get to own a house. That'll be nice when my parents die.

Yeah, dude. Yeah. But unfortunately, you've got to look after them in their old age. Yeah, right? They'll leave that into the dog or whatever. Yeah, exactly, dude. Anyway, zombie. So vibes two to a three, depending on your drip.

Yeah. Yeah. Embarrassment, one. What, embarrassment? Like, well, five, really. It's max embarrassing. Our scale's going to become complicated. It is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because, it's higher. Okay, because one is bad. So let's say one is most embarrassing, five is least embarrassing. Most likely to, so that's the only one that's flipped.

Yeah, yeah. Well, let's just give them an overall score. That's going to be simpler for us. Yeah. Yeah. I think two. Okay, two. Well, I'll allow two. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, what about enderman? That's not where I would have gone with this What is a what?

An Enderman's like a tall Yeah, yeah, yeah, we could have I understand what a zombie is I have a frame of reference Imagine a tall teleporting shadow man Do you know? You can't look in the eyes Not good, not good for only like you know

bonding, yeah This will help you Remember Slender Man? Yeah Ender Man is Slender Man Yeah, yeah, yeah Except he flies Yeah

I can remember if Slender Man flies I don't think he flies You can do whatever you want Enderman fly do they? Enderman. Yeah. They kind of teleport around. They don't fly them.

And it'll pick up bits of like blocks and just take them. That's nice. And you can't look them in the eye or they go crazy. Okay. Well, look, so I guessing this is a, you know, it's going to be, I guess this is like looking after an abused dog where you're like, well, I've got to meet them on their ground. So I'm not going to force the issue. So I'm going to do like things slowly and slowly.

Like, you know, okay, you're in your corner. And I'm just going to sit here. Yeah, that's true. And there's a little bit of food here. If you want to come over and say hello, that's fine. I'm not going to look in the eye. So again, it's another simple situation. I like that all I'm treating these steps.

It's like dogs. I think that's a really good move. Sometimes you got her. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The difference in a dog and a child. That's how you win a, hey, as a step. Well, look, you know, Johnny Baby is into what I like to call a biting face. And so sometimes you just be like, well, you're a bad dog. Bad dog, don't bite me.

That's awesome. It's good. And he's got teeth now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, dude. I think with an end of man, this might be like a, you know, a perfect opportunity for us to pull out

an old standard and just tear our own eyes out. That is a good way. Then we can't look at any eye. That's true. And we can't look our wife in the eye. Who we're married because she's hot. Yeah. That was what I said in my vows. I said, if you were ugly, I wouldn't be here. God, you're so hot.

And you arrest your family's smoking too. Hey, guys, step, Grandma, uncles? Wink, wink. Hey, finally, I've married into a gamilf family. Gimilf. Yeah, germilf. Good. If it was like an F in there, I'm like, oh yeah.

A good family. Like, it's a, you know, oh, it's a filth. Yeah, family I'd like to fuck. Gamilf. The dish is out of the good milf. Yeah, grandma. Oh, okay, you're just going for the grandma. I was saying finally a grandmother I'd like to fuck family.

Oh. We were gone for the whole family. Oh, yeah, a filth. A filth, Phil, Phil, Phil. Yeah, yeah. Honey, you are so smoking. Yeah. But God, so is the rest of your family.

You come from hot stock, babe. Yeah, babe. Phil, full the way down. Yum, yum. Yeah, I won't cheat on you, but if I was going to cheat on you, it would be one of your immediate family members. Let me give you the order of your family members in our team. You, number one, every single other member, too.

Maybe 1.5. Yeah. This is awesome vows. I'm just gassing them up, babe. I'm just gassing them up. I just wanted to feel beautiful. Is that a crime? I just like, I've been getting into something called nudist lunches.

Do you reckon? Do you think, you can, you can, you want to come? Do like a family nudist lunch for me? Yeah. What if that's just cool? A nudist Sunday lunch? A nudist lunch. And then we put on the side, it's okay to get a bono.

Yeah. What do we think about that? Yeah. Because it would be. It's like, nude it is like, that's just normal. It's not even sexualized. But jacking off is also normal and not sexualized. A normal jacket off nudist's lunch.

Do we think we could do that? Would that be chill? That'd be chill. I love you so much because of how hot you are. You're like your uncle David would be into that? What about grandma, Beatrice? Aunt Peru. I was going to say, Aunt Peru.

Aunt Peru. Aunt Peru. Aunt Peru. Just put it, just like, I'll just say, I'll just say. send out a letter and see if they want to come to my naked lunch. Yeah. Whoa. There's expressions of interest.

Yeah. I don't know. Just if they're interesting. You know, just like, no, a normal naked lunch. No one comes and you're just naked in the backyard grilling. That's a strange dude. I think it's worse if three people come. Oh, yeah.

Three people with naked grilling. Yeah, you, naked Dave. Yeah, of course. Of course, naked Dave. Naked Dave's a lot. And pervert, Jim. Well, perfect, really And they're all so hot

Yeah, the ideal situation But it's sad if they're your plus two Yeah, dude, I'm having a hot naked family lunch Yeah. Pervert Jim and naked damn, you would love it. You'd have the time of your life And then they're waiting at the whole time. Yeah, they're probably still coming.

Yeah, this traffic's really bad at this time. Maybe they're just like, it's like taking them a while to get their clothes off or something. I'll cook up 37 hot dogs. They're probably driving, not naked. Then they're going to get naked. Maybe they fucked up and they did drive naked and now the cops are grilling. I should have told them not to go naked in the car.

They could get naked in the house. It's like, you know, get my group chat out. Yeah. It's just like, only you ask you questions. Scene, scene, scene, scene, scene. Occasional meme of like, you know. Like, it's cool to be naked grilling with the fam. No likes.

Grandma Beatrice has left the chat. Oh, she's all. She must have accidentally hit the wrong button. I'll invite her back. Yeah, invited her back, but she hasn't hit, yeah. Oh, yeah, technology's half old. Yeah, so it's difficult. Your wife standing in the kitchen looking out of you being like,

what am I getting out of this? Someone to raise your ugly steps on. Whom, if you look in the eye, he kills you. Right? Right? Yeah, exactly. Time to poke out my eyes. I guess if the hot naked family's not coming.

What's the point of my eyes? Oh, wait, my hot wife! Of course! You just got one eye. Yeah, you got stopped halfway through. Well, that's good, because you could close that eye. Yeah, and then you don't see you. I mean, you can always just close your eyes anywhere to look at your,

when you steps up. Well, that is true. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What about the Shaq meme? End of man, closed eyes, and then open eyes hot white. Yeah, what do we think of that? That's really good, dude. That's esoteric.

Is that Shaq? I think it's Shaq. I think it's Shaq. Yeah. Okay, what about the fact that he's going to be picking up stuff and teleporting away with it? Well, picking up stuff could be good because if he's like, you know, cleaning up his room. for example, like, you know, or he's cleaning up around the house. That's quite

nice. I'm imagining these, like, you know, our step-sons are in, like, you know, almost like primary school. Yeah, that's kind of the age I was picturing, yeah. Well, that's like, it's kind of normal to be picking stuff up. Teleporting less so, but running's normal. Exactly. Well, and if you teleport, you know, like, hopefully it's not like, where's my remote? Oh, no. Yeah.

Now, again, depending on the age of the child, like, he's going to be picking up things that you don't want him to pick up. Your porter mags. I was a bet if he gets into my porno mags, dash, telecoppy on the road. I'm like, where's my porno mags? Oh, no.

They've been gotten by the steps. He's given him to his friends. Yeah, exactly. And then I become porno dad. Yeah, and then I got to a video. All like all these, you know, very, very specific poros are mine that the sun has stolen. Yeah. Yeah, this is me.

Big beaver monthly. I just love me of the bea. The sweet of the honey, I said. You know, I just like me some unshaven filth. Yeah, exactly, dude. That's what I'm in it for. Did you guys have a kid that had a point? Porno dad growing up.

No, Porno dad. I just had, like, friends that either had older, like, it was pretty much just like, unolder brother. Older cousin.

Yeah. No, mine had, we spent, like, days searching his, he's like, I know my dad has porno somewhere in the house. We have a porno VHS,

and we would spend, this is in primary school, we would spend. Do you ever find it? No. Do you reckon your friend was lying then? I don't know. Yeah.

Probably. I reckon your friend was lying. So we had, well, we had a, like, a kid out of stepdad. Yeah. He was the porn.

He had, I guess, enough porno mags, and we managed to steal one. And he didn't even notice? Well, he didn't say anything. I guess he can't. You can't be like, kids. Did you steal my porn magazine? I want to jerk off. You can't do that.

You're not going to miss this one, stepdad. Yeah, exactly. Just have sex with my mom. Exactly. I don't want to. That's why I got the porn masks. I want to jack off in a different room. Exactly.

You'll understand when you're older, okay. My back hurts, and your mom's back hurts, and now neither of us want to go on top. We jerk off in separate rooms, okay? That's the beauty of getting old. I take the kitchen, she takes the garage. Jerking off in a garage is a grim scene. Don't go in the kitchen. No, but jerking off in the kitchen, you've lost your mind.

You're going crazy. You're halfway through making a souffle. You lived in a garage. You've jacked off in a garage. Yeah, but it was a garage slash room. No, it wasn't. It was a garage garage. It was a garage garage.

It's a garage. the bed in there and a nest full of spiders if people ever think because I feel like you've misled our audience if people were around when the Jackson lives

in a garage vibe in time people would be like oh yeah okay ha ha ha garage but like people do turn garages into bedrooms yours was not like that

it had a shelf with a TV on it and a bed yeah put a rug down the rug down but then the rest of the there was a chest of drawers

then the rest of the garage which I would say was at least 50% no like 30% 30% was storage. There was no car in there. Exactly. That would have been crazy.

Yeah, there was no car, but there was still like... Oh, there was shit everywhere. Yeah. That was mostly his shit. Yeah. But there was storage up the back of the garage. That is true. That is true.

And it was only carpeted... There was only one wrong. Yeah, yeah. No, it was carpeted like, I think all the way. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was carpeted the whole thing was carpeted. Yeah. But like, like, you know, rug carpeted. It wasn't pleasant living.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's not beat around the bush. It just wasn't like, you know, oil-stained the car there. Jerking off, but imagine jerking off in a garage with a car in it. No creature comforts. Didn't I think that's a grimmer scene? Are you jerking off in the car?

No. That's worse. But if I'm jerking off in the car, I think that's better. Jerking off in a garage and jerking off in a car. In the garage. Feels like it's like, because it's jerking off, it is hard to make this sexy. but you know what I mean because there's like a little bit of like

those are unusual places but it's like a private can be a private place where a kitchen to me that's a thoroughfare yeah you should not be jerking off in the kitchen like imagine you know you're the step there you've got your pornos and you've stashed them in the garage you're like oh I've got to go work on my tools I gotta go work on the tools and by tools I mean my cock

yeah that's right I've thought yeah yeah I'm not hiding it I'm jerking it leave me alone I'm just dirt that's what I'm doing it then I can imagine that and like I don't You just come in an old, like, oil-stained rad. Yeah. Oh, God.

What a sad life. I can imagine that. Yeah, yeah. Well, yeah. But sitting down in the car seems like... No, but I kind of get the car because it's like... So you're saying... Okay, I want to know.

Okay, this is my picture. I want to paint you. You are, like, you're there. You got your porno mag. You put that on the dashboard on the wall or whatever. You take your pants down and your durps and around your ankles. You sit in the front seat. Yeah.

And then you start cranking it. You put like a t-shirt on. Oh, that's awesome. Maybe it's your work shirt. Yeah, yeah. So if you don't, whatever. If you come on it, it's fine. Yeah.

And you've reclined a little bit. That's awesome. And then because I'm getting chilly, I turn on the car. And then our point of orgasm, I slam my foot on the accelerator. Turn on the car. You've killed yourself in a very interesting way. People go, is he trying to do autoerotic expaciation really, really wrong? Yeah.

Now, okay, let me. Yeah. Paint a picture. that could happen in like the 2020s, or 2010s. Okay. But we now live in the online sexy lifestyles where everyone has a phone in their pocket. And all of those phones have cameras and stuff like that. I could imagine someone jacking it in a garage or in a car whilst also kind of sexting.

Oh, okay. Sending Snapchats and stuff like that. And then that becomes fun and sexy. Are they in the garage in their car? So it would be like, because you hear about this a bunch of, like, people would be, like, sneaking away and sending, like, sexy photos. Like, they're like, oh, I'm out for dinner. I'm going to go to the bathroom. Whoops, here's a photo of one tit popped out.

So the scenario could be. I'm married to the kid, but me and my wife, the bedroom's dead, and I'm having an affair. Or, no, no, no, okay. Yes, that, or here's a happier version of that, which is going, you and your wife. You live in a wonderful, you're having a wonderful marriage, but you've got a kid. Or maybe not a kid, because that... Like I said, no, no, no, okay, yeah, having a kid, life's looking after the kid or whatever. Little kid.

Yeah, little kid. And it's like, you know, for some reason, you can't sneak off to the bedroom and maybe you're in the garage, working on your tools. And you're like, hey, babe. Hey, babe, look at this. Look at my... I'm working at my tools. Yeah. Pan across to, you jacking off.

Like, wrench, wrench. Jacket off dick. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can't be going on. Holding a screwdriver. Yeah. Is this sexy? No.

Hey, babe, check it out. Wrench, wrench, sounding with a screwdriver. Babe, is this sexy? There's nothing for a minute. Call the ambulance. Nothing for a minute. Really long voice message.

You press play. Is this black? Is this sexy? I was imagining, like a really, like a flat-handle shit too. Babe, check out, I'm working on my tools. Is this sexy? Don, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, don't, call an ambulance. Oh, fuck, that's funny.

Yeah, so you can see how, like, jacking off in a car or a garage could be fun. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I can imagine, but I can also just imagine. I guess, like, in that situation, like, if I'm putting, you know, variables like that, then yeah, the kitchen also technically would be fine. But the kitchen can be a thoroughfare. The thing is, I'm also like, why aren't you in the bedroom? Well, no, but that's why, so you could

imagine if you've got, like, maybe your sex life's not great. Or whatever, or anything. How about this? Two bedroom, like, two bedroom place. Yeah. It's an apartment. So two-bed apartment. It's the marital bedroom and the kid's bedroom. Yeah. And the kid's in, and then you've got like a kitchen, lounge room,

which is all open, playing, and you've got a garage, right? It's not a carp. This apartment has a garage, let's say, an enclosed garage that is yours. Yeah. And say it's an early morning and the whatever. And the kid has, you know, it's come into bed with, you know, the family. And so they're like, okay, whatever. And so mom is in bed, you know, the master bedroom with the kid.

And you're feeling a little bit horny. Okay. A little bit naughty. And so like, well, I want to sex my beautiful wife. Yeah, of course. And while, like, the only place is now, like the kitchen lounge room, which is a thoroughfare. And they could come out at any moment, can't do that. Or the kid's bedroom, can't do that.

Obviously, you're not doing that, yeah. So obviously, you've got to go to the garage. Then, okay. Yeah. And also, if you're in the garage, it's probably, like, it's not a, it's kind of a colder area. Yeah. You go, well, if I get in the car, yeah, I'm a little warmer. It's a bit more comfortable.

Yeah. And I can also imagine, you know, like, you know, it's a classic thing for your dad to have, like, a shed or the garage. And, you know, what else is he doing it? Exactly. His little man cave or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. That's why they call man cave, man caves, because they're just sitting around jacking off.

Yes, dude. Tell me, I'm wrong. My dad doesn't have a man cave. He's got a goon cave. That's a dad of the future. That will be. It'll be goon caves all the way down, dude. Yeah, dude.

Where's your husband? Oh, she's in the goon cave. We're normalizing gooning in this household. Yeah, like, you know, there's, unlike the, um, there's, like, property buying shows or whatever, and they're like, well, I'm going to need somewhere for my sewing. And he's got to have his goon cave. He's got a goon sewing. somewhere my man yeah he has like a six monitor to set up yeah and all these flashlights he loves gooning to AI hentai oh my man my man my man my man

impressions have come back in a big way in the future yeah yeah they did a gender swap the ball ride yeah my man nice my husband very nice yeah um um anyway so so slender end the man yeah i feel bad just like as hard as he His mom and family are. They are beautiful. Vibe wise. Pretty bad because you can't look them in the eye. And if you do look at him, he's tall wearing like a black suit and he has purple glowing eyes and like

this horrible mystical stuff around. It was weird to have like, I don't know. I mean, it's probably very common, but like, you know, your stepson to be taller than you. Yeah, it's true. I mean, most, you know, most kids are going to be taller than their parents. I'm tall than my stepdad. Yeah, like, again, I'm taller than my dad. But it is just like, you know.

I'm also taller than my dad. Nice. I'm fucking tall in everything. I'm fucking 7 foot 12 Which some people would say is 8 foot, not you Not me, I'm 712 I'm actually 512 Yeah

All 4 24 4 days a week 24 days a week Go on Yeah, he's generally like you know What did that mean? They age Who knows man I say you know it's like whatever

But then like if you come and Ender man is so tall Yeah, yeah, he's so tall, but four days, 24 days. Four days, 24. That's too stupid to laugh this much at. Please, I'm going to carry on. I think I've lost it like 80, several, it's of 80 audience right now. Not even funny, whatever.

Four 24 is much better. That's so funny and so true, Joseph. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. End the man who's tall and that or whatever. I thought that could be a good riff, but no, that's coming nowhere. Even if it was a decent one, we've lost it. Yeah. 424, 4 days a week.

Is this a riff on 24-7? Yeah. But you fucked up because it's not 24 hours, 7 days a week. You've gone for four days, 24 days. Four days a week, 24 days a week. That's what I'm working, dude. Which is not... Not anything?

It's nothing. It's extremely incoherent as even a thing to say. Hell yeah, brother. Four days, 24 days. 24 days What about four hours a week 24 days a week 24 days a week

Wait Four hours a day 24 days a week Move on So I guess Enderman What do we give it him I'm gonna go I know I just gave

I dished out of two But Enderman has a hot family Yeah And his vibe is bad But it's kind of cool Yeah So I turn up at your primary school With him people go

That guy's got a teleporting son My son doesn't fucking teleporting son. Yeah, my teleporting son just... He doesn't teleport to me and tear my head off. He teleports to the fridge. He teleports to the fridge for some fucking twinkies. He's like a dark energy around him, which he doesn't kind of be like edgy and fucking... Yeah.

Mysterious. I mean, this is only my only, like bringing that up, my argument is to not hit him with a one but a two. Yeah, I think a two's fair. And I guess looking after in your old age, you'd be capable of it. Yeah, he could do it, which is much more... I don't think he's going to eat me. Yeah, no, no, he'll just teleport about you with a pillow. Yeah, well, my cataracts get in, I can at least, you know, face in the direct.

Yeah, that's true. You can finally look at him and say, son. Son, please put the pillow from my face. He might. He's like, I'm already there, Dad. I was already doing that. Oh, he called me Dad. Oh, he called me Dad.

Calling you dad just before he kills you in your hospital bed. Well, I wanted that. I say, son, remember that kid at your primary school that teleported but sucked? He's so much better than him. Yeah. That's all I'm doing in my old. age, remembering children worse than my child. Yeah.

Hey, here's a maybe controversial thing. Wanting your stepson to call your dad, cringe. You don't like it? That's crazy. If I was a stepdad, yeah. Yeah. Like, I know, like, I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Even if the dad, like, the dad was the father, but not a dad or whatever the fuck, that

guy says in Guardians too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're the other dad who stepped out, though, so it makes sense. No, no, no, but if I stepped up, and like, I, obviously in this situation, I love the kid. Yeah. But, like, at no point, because if he calls me dad, like, that's nice or whatever. I'm not going to be, like, shut up, I'm not your dad. Yeah.

I'm playing the dad role. Yeah. But, like, I'm not going to be like, like, being like, fuck, I want this short. Yeah, I mean, look, hey, as much you say, like, you know, Jackson has very rotten energy and all of those kind of things. And the vibe of you are, like, you know, very much, like, have a egg in your pocket at all, like, time vibe. You are not, like, you're not, like, you're not, like, give good parental energy. Yeah. So it makes sense.

Sorry, brother. Legalized smoking on the 12. Yeah. So, like, yeah, it makes sense. Yeah. I get why you're like, oh, again. But I guess, you know,

again, I think it would be very, very nice. I've definitely seen, and it's like, really heartwarming videos of people where they make, either they,

like, they haven't adopted the kid yet, but like, you know, for, like, their birthday or whatever, they give them adoption papers. You don't, you think it's cringe to desire that.

I think it's cringe to want it because, like, kids will sense it. Yeah. If you want it, it's never happening. Being happy if it happens, fine. I can understand, basically, I think it's cringed to want that as a goal,

but it's not cringed for it to happen and it to be like nice. Well, I think, I guess, I don't know for most stepdad's if it's a goal. Okay, what it, yeah, okay, fair. Like, I think it is like, well, yeah, no, that's, but I mean, what I'm saying agrees with that because not every stepdad is cringe. Yes, yes, yeah, yeah, that's fair enough. But it would be weird to enter a relationship with a very beautiful, hot mom to have, be wanted to be called dad by their kids.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's weird. Yeah, that's strange. And strange. We have passed great. I've definitely heard of like step dads that have been like, like obviously the relationship is number one. But they're like, all right, next goal.

Get this kid to call me dad. Yeah. It's not up to you, you know? Like, you get it. I mean, okay, are you pissed off? Okay, so you're, so let's say, yeah. The relationship you've stepped into. Yeah.

The mom and the dad, it's also funny every time I talk about stuff like this because I am. You are a step. None of this is based on my life. Yeah, yeah, yeah. it's more based on people I've been around, I guess. But yeah, like, if you if you found out, so you're a stepdad,

kid starts calling your dad, you're like, this is the happiest day ever. But you find out he's still calling his other dad, dad, dad. Does that cheapen it for you? They should call the other dad's stepdad. Old dad, now should be new dad. Past dad? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But doesn't cheapen it? Yeah. Doesn't cheap in it? What if he calls me stepdad? But he doesn't call your dad? He says, stepdad. That's fine. Again, that's fine for me.

But he calls me Mr. Bailey. That's what I like. Again, it depends on like, you know, the stepdad to be like, you know, next goal of him to call me dad. And if that's like either just like him just, you know, having a bit of a laugh or joke with his mates or whatever, it depends on the saying it. If it's like a true, like, I've got to get this no matter what. It's a weird thing. I kind of agree with you. Less on cringe, more strange. Yeah, yeah.

Because again, it's more just like, oh yeah, well, look, I would love him to call me dad. And so for that, you know, well, I got to step up and be really good and like, you know, be the dad that is like, you know. That's cringe, cringe, cringe. You don't want him to try to be the dad that he's replacing? To be the dad that stepped up. Like, you know, I need a goal because, like... No, having a goal, because the goal, the goal thing... The goal is to be a good father.

That's fine. No, no, no, no, no, no. As long as the goal isn't, I'm going to be a good enough father that he calls me dad. Yeah, okay. Well, it's kind of that, like, you know, whatever... Well, if they're part and parcel. You go, I'll be a good enough dad and it would be chilly. It would be nice if he called me dad.

No, I think if you're thinking about it. You don't like it? No. He's like, yeah, like, I'm going to be a good dad. You know, like, I wanted to call me dad. Yeah, the best way I do on that really is like, you know, I'm going to be a good dad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'm going to be a good dad.

I have no issue whatsoever. In fact, obviously, I openly encourage anyone that is in a step relationship to be a good parent. Yeah, yeah. Make that your goal. Don't worry about what they call you. They can call you fuck wit if you're a good. And they will. If they call you fuck wit, you're probably not a good parent.

That again, depends on the situation. It depends on, like, you know, most. You might just have a rancid kid. That's not on you. No one talks about that, but you can't just have a bad one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Your parents, dear. Yeah, exactly.

They're a rotten child. Yeah. Yeah, man. Yeah, but then they fixed it with the second one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sort of. It kind of went the other way. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I don't know, I don't think it's cringe to, yeah. Depends if it's like, I want to, I want to call me dad and then do no work. I think the reason I think it's cringe is because my brain processes it as you want validation from a child. Yeah, yeah, I see. But you're right, because it's not... It's not like I want the child's validation. It's like, that's the role I'm trying to fill in this kid's wife.

If he's calling me dad, then I... I'm actually, I'm like, I'm a fish... That's the last piece of the positive being part of this thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a good goal. But if it's like, I wanted him to call me dad, and all I'm going to do is bang his hot wife, go on the tansom with the boys.

That's awesome. Really fucked up my adults. I really fucked up my adults. Yeah. I want my adult stepson to call me dad The best way is to bang his hot wife I'm sorry, I think you fucked off Yeah

I don't think so No no I've been reading about being called daddy or something I think I got my wires Yeah So I think it's like you know I'm like your stepson's hot wire That's awesome You've really ruined the whole family there

Just absolutely But yeah I feel like okay Yeah I want him to call me dad And I'm gonna do his bang his hot mom And go to my gud cave And then hang out with the boys Yeah like you're yeah That's cringe

because you are doing a validation. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But if it's like, oh, I wanted to call me dad because that means I'm doing everything right. Yeah. I think, again, again, that, like, thinking like that, fine. That's not what I'm...

It's like, you know, going to bed and being like, oh, honey, I love having sex with you, my hot wife. Yeah. I just really wish little... Bog. Bog, yeah. Jackson's abandoned child. God, I reckon...

I reckon... I just... The one. One thing I want more than anything is... See you, Bog. But? Yeah. Yeah.

I just really want Bog to call me dad. Like... You should want Bog to call you dad. I'm just like, I can't sleep at night because I just want Bog to call me dad. Yeah. Don't worry about it. Yeah, it doesn't matter, dude. Yeah, it depends on, because it's so much like, yeah, conditions, like, you know,

it's that weird thing to be like, you know, I had a great day, you know, played fetch. Yeah. What am I? I had a great day. Why am I doing this? Every... Played fetch with him. I'd love him to call me dad.

I'd love this dog, son of yours, to call me dad. I fuck your dog's not wife. You know, I'm having a great time. I wish my dog would call me dad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, it doesn't look at me and bark. I hate this boy. Boy, you get fetch with my boy, Bob.

You play catch with him. We've had a good day, et cetera, et cetera, doing all nice things. That he's like, thank you. And he calls you by your name. Yeah. Look, hey, it's fine. But yeah, you're right. You're just taking your stride.

But it might, again, I don't know, the person who might eat. I think you would. I reckon if I hit a point where I was a stepdad to a kid and I in every single way was fulfilling that dad wrong where like every possible thing

we were as close as like a father and son should be and he didn't call me dad I would at a certain point be like why like if he was like I just you'll never replace my my... You're not my dad would be a yeah but then you open yourself up to that well you're not

my dad and he's not wrong you're not Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely. I just would... You're Jackson. You're Mr. Bailey. You're my mom's boyfriend. Whatever. What was your name again?

Bog, I think. Oh my God, Bog. I left him at the airport. We weren't at the airport to take a flight. I was just showing him an airport. Yeah, you'd heard that you could get, if you know the right people, you can get cheap coffee at the airport.

Bog, let me show you a trick to get cheap coffee. I know a guy. Yeah, going up to every store. Is this where I get the cheap coffee? And then I forget why I'm there. Yeah, I have to say something about, uh, I've got the coupon code frequent flyer or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know Dave.

Dave sent me. Dave sent me. Naked Dave? Yeah, naked Dave sent me. Something about coffee? Yeah. And then I hear, oh, the flight to Fiji is now boarding. And I'm like, well, that's my flight.

And that's where I lose bog. Yeah. I'm kicked out because I don't have a boarding. passing pass right? Yeah, yeah. I just got confused. But yeah, like, yeah, it's a point we're like, wow, I've been doing everything right. I just would be curious. Anything was like, you know, my dad, like, I just could never call you there. Fair enough. But I would be interested to know why. I guess like the logic I'm coming out with this doesn't really hold water because in the sense of like, I guess it's like a time thing as well. It's like day two of like, you know.

Yeah, yeah. I also think it's an age thing. If you come into the, if it's the kids like five, you're fine. But if you're going to. into a relationship where the kid's like 12, that ship's probably sale. Yeah. It probably hasn't. It just means like, you know, it'll either mean more or it'll like, you know. And again, it depends. Because again,

that's what I'm saying. You've seen stuff where it's like, you know, they've been like, you know, like a father figure, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. And then like, you know, for like a birthday or whatever, they're like, you know, here's my present. It's adoption papers. Yeah, yeah. That's very, very touching. Very heartwarming. Dichin anybody does it for like calling you grandpa. Like if you've come

in as like a step grandpa, to a family, and you go, when are these grandkids gonna call me grandpa? I think that's impossible. That's an impossible move. I have a step-grandpa, I don't call him grandpa. That's what I mean. You're never getting called grandpa. Yeah, you're never getting called grandpa. If you like, yeah. Or Bob. Yeah. You marry grandma, uh, whatever. You ain't, you're like, you're like, Mr. Jim or whatever. Well, my dad's in a situation where, uh, he, so he remarried. Yeah. And then his, like, so he had a stepdaughter. Yeah. Yeah. That stepdaughter has kids. Yeah.

no questions are straight off the bat. Grandpa. Oh, that's crazy. So, like, he... It can happen. Yeah. Wow. How old were the kids? Well, okay. So, I mean, the kids were... He was around where they were born. Oh, that makes sense. I'm saying when you come to a pre-established family, like, you know,

granddad has died. Yeah. I am... My age I have now. Grandma's like, well, I met this guy where we're getting married. We're like, okay, that's weird. Yeah, whatever. We ain't call him granddad.

Dad didn't marry a grandma. He married a mother. I found out it's very late in my life. Yeah. Like, you know, not recently. like like four years. But yeah, when my, uh, uh, grandma, like my mom's mom died, my mom's dad remarried someone. Oh, wow. But then she also died. And then he died. But like, it was like, you know, like, maybe a year or whatever. Yeah. I think I was born, but I had no

memory of this. Well, yeah, my step-grandpa and grandma, I would have been like four or five when it happened. Yeah. But I still never called him grandpa and grandpa. Yeah, blew my mind. And I think, my mom not go to the wedding or maybe my mom's sister. One of them didn't go to They're like this, no, we're not doing this. Yeah. Well, I think it's interesting that my step-grandpa, he got a grandpa name, he's Pop Pop. Yeah. My step-grandma got nothing. She's got her first name.

Lorraine. Imagine if I got that at one. You're like, huh? I'd be like, what? Don't talk to my step-grandma. Sorry, don't talk to my step-grandma. Don't talk to Lorraine. Lorraine and Popper?

Yeah. Oh, no, Lorraine! Maybe you are cold call. You do speak of a ghost. Is Lorraine dead? No. Sorry, no, I just speak to aunts On the phone

He's an aunt, cleverer Yeah But like, I've decided the uncle wife Yeah I'm like, yeah, I'm just, you know I've just figured out I really want to be a step-uncle So I'm just hitting up all the aunts Step-uncle's a complicated one

That's nothing Yeah Would you, you don't Do I have step-uncles? You'd be like, oh, you know, oh, it's like, you know It's step-uncle Stephen Yeah, you just don't do that My uncle

Oh, it's Stephen, my, you know, like Well, I call my uncle, yeah, because you usually just call your uncles. I mean... It says Steve, my, you know, like my aunt's husband. Well, actually, I was going to say, this is a blanket rule, but it's not a blanket. I call my uncles by their first name. Yeah. But I guess some people will say like, oh, this is uncle first name.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's uncle, you know. Yeah, well, I just go name. Yeah, me too, me too, me too. Yeah, yeah, I go uncle, you know. But I also call my stepdad by his first name, which doesn't paint anything that I said earlier. Gave him the respect he didn't know what it deserved. Um, yeah I call my aunties, my uncles, my stepdad all by the first name.

Mom and Dad get Mom and Dad. Yeah, yeah, that makes sense. That's fair. Grandma and Nan, that's my two. Grammy and Pop Pop. Yeah, and then I got, yeah. But then my dad's parents were Grandma Judy and Grandpa Bill, which is weird. But my grandpa, on my mom's side, it's just Grandpa. Why do that?

It's also stuff that this kind of happens. Unless you're with, like, the first and you're, like, you know, family. It's like often this. things are just like a tradition that sticks because, like, oh yeah, because, you know, well, you've got to say Grandpa Judy because, you know, that first child, whatever, they have got over here, you've also got, you know, grandpa, like, you know, whatever. So it's like, yeah, it makes sense.

But then Grandpa Bill weirdly lost the grandpa. At a certain point, we just called him Bill. I don't know what that's about. That sucks, demoted. Yeah, he was demoted. I mean, he was a crotchety old sort of piece of guy. Fuck Bill. Fuck, well, dude.

I'm sure I've told this story before, but my favorite Grandpa Bill story is when someone did a big poo in the pool. Speaking of pools from earlier And he was on a tear, dude stomping around being like, who pooed in the pool? Who pooed in the pool? Did he ever solve it? Well, he thought, Ryder, my brother had done it, and he was like,

did you poo in the pool? And Ryder started laughing. And he was like, it's not funny! And Ryder was like, it's hilarious. How old was? He would have been like six, seven maybe? Then we found out it was my cousin Fergus had pooed in the pool. That's classic Fergus.

Yeah, dude. Fergus had pooed in the pool. Yeah, we got lost in the weeds a little bit there and we're almost out of time, so... Let's just do one more. Yeah, creep up, they explode. That's not good. I don't want a sun that blows up like a bomb.

No. They go... Is there like a time? Also, if you get close to... If you spend too much time close to it, it goes... But if you move away, it sort of calms down. Yeah. So, living in a house...

It's a son you love from far away. Yeah. So living in the same house, that's going to be rough. The house is fine. Okay? Unless you go... So, if you were... Sharing meals, I can't share meals.

I feel like this is all, this is going to be, you know, ask in the garage, you're joking. Being like, you can't hit me or exploding. I'm taking my meals in the car. Well, my son eats at the table alone. Once again, we're off to the gud came. Yeah. And unfortunately for a creeper, they're not like an enemy.

Because, you know, like when you play other video games, sometimes there'll be things that explode, but then they just like heal and they can exploit again. Not a creeper, it's one and done. Yeah. This feels bad. I can't like, you know, kiss him good. nine, you're not reading a book.

Oh, you can. From far away. You're just got to be, no, no, no, no, no, you just be really quick. Run in, run out before your son blows on. It goes, it goes, bang. But if you run away during the, yeah, yeah. Drive him to school in a limo.

Yeah. What about, okay, or if you walk into school. Oh, a leash. Yeah, good idea. Really treating them like dogs, you know. Why am I doing this? I don't know, you're the only one with a son and too. people talk a lot of shit about leashing children

but I can see the effect I can see the benefit yeah because they sort of just get to like chill but at the same time you can't lose yeah exactly like they get to run around and think they have freedom I remember like talking to a mother at an airport speaking of airports yeah

god this episode's good at all we were like yeah we had a little baby who was quite young and like whatever and she had like three kids and like one of them was like on the leash and we started talking and they were like yeah these two beautiful didn't like need the leash basically

But this one We'll run A leashed son That's awesome Gotta leash this one Like that's clever Yeah that's clever Yeah always in your back pocket

I'm like I'll remember this I remember this If you have a child You know like you gotta die I do fear that your son Johnny baby will need to be a leash baby He'll need to be leashed Bro I feel he needs to be leached

Now he can barely walk This morning he was crawled over And me and my you know My beautiful wife My baby's hot mom Yeah I agree. That's my new guy now.

Thank you. Come on your wife's hot. Yeah, bro. Yeah, that's awesome. I'm friends with us, so this is normal for me to say. Oh, yeah, 100%. Yeah.

Your hot wife, my hot friend, your wife. They're like, yeah, I get when there's like, you know, old comedians, like stand-ups, whatever, they're talking about the whole idea of, like, you know, it's like, you know, it's like, yeah, it's terrifying something. But the only thing worse than when you're hearing your kids like, yeah, when they're quiet.

What are they getting up to? Yeah. And then, like, yeah, nothing. Nothing. And we looked over and, and he's in the corner, like, looking at something, like, what's he got? What's he doing? What's he looking at?

A bug? And then we quickly, like, you know, Sims very quick to get there. He's holding something. Seiz her coming, puts it in his mouth so quickly, so quickly. Oh my God. We're like, get it out, get it.

It was like a bit of like chip plaster or whatever when we had drilled into something in the wall that had fallen off. He's eating the walls. He's eating the walls. I don't know if I could sit a chipter of the skirting board or something. Yeah, oh, that's awesome. What are you doing?

How do you get that? So funny, dude. So yeah, man, leash. Yeah, leash your child. Who cares, dude? Yeah, especially if it's a creeper and it will explode. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. This way you can have it on a distance.

Yeah, that's smart, yeah, because a distance for a creeper, so anywhere in this room would be too close, but if they were in, say, Studio B. Yeah, that'd be fine. That'd be fine. It needs to be a long leash, but... Yeah, a long leash, and I guess if you'd be in bedtime stories, you call them from afar. Yeah, you could call them on a phone. Yeah, that's true.

Get them on the blow on. That's a good point. Give your baby a phone. Would you be embarrassed to drop off the creeper at school? No, Creeper's got a good vibe. I think I would be like, it's sad because he's probably going to blow up at school. Yeah. When I say, see you, Creeper, and watch you get out the very far end of the limousine.

I say, see you, creeper, and then as I'm driving away, I'm crying. Every day is the last day. Is it just me that'll set him off? No, it's anything. Oh, this is so sad. Well, no, not anybody. Other mobs won't. Other mobs don't.

Other mobs don't. It probably is just you. Just me. Then I pull up and he's there, and I'm like, oh, my God. You survive. Yeah. Oh, it's just me that makes you blow. I don't know what the fuck you're saying.

Did we... I don't speak explosions. Did we just blow up his mom and have to adopt this? Yeah, yeah, yeah. This sucks. Yeah. Damn it, dude. As soon, you have to adopt because you blew up his mom.

That's kind oficated. Yeah, because she was really hot, but you didn't realize that, you know, having sex would be... And it blew up my janitor. Yeah, yeah, dude. Exactly. I thought I was going to get blown. I did, just not how I thought. Yeah.

Damn. What was that, hon? Oh. Wow, we got, it was, I guess, really ready to nut before. Call an ambulance. Yeah, going ambulance. I blow it up my penis. I cooked it at the sauce.

Yeah. It's exploded at the root, babe, unfortunately. So, yeah, I think a creeper is also a two. Meaning that none of the mobs we covered today were any better or worse than each other. That's beautiful. That is somewhat beautiful. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And let us know which Rift did you like the best. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Was it 424? Was it jacking, or the horse spoon bank? I like that one. Or was it sounding with a screen? Or was it the sincere discussion of whether it's cringe or not cringe to want your stepkid to call you dad? In the comments below this YouTube video, write your favorite rift.

Or on Spotify? Or on Spotify? Or on Spotify, yeah. if you were like a five-star review on Apple podcast and then you can say the... Just like let us know so we know which path to go down.

Well, you could subscribe to the bad brain boys get a bonus episode of Plumby the Dut Star every month. Bonus episode of our what-if show where we go through the 1970s Marvel What If comics, but then most importantly, have access to the Discord. And only get access to Discord if you subscribe through our website,

not through Apple Podcast. And that podcast is great. It's very easy. It's right there, but they... You can do that now, too, if you want to give us a hand. If they have an API or whatever. It is beyond me. Yeah.

But then you can jump in the Discord. You can tag us and say, this was my favorite riff. Yeah. And I'll say, okay. Or I'll say, what? What's happening right now? Dude, I'm so scared. I'm actually the most afraid I've ever been.

Yeah. Thanks for the message. I've never been more scared in my entire life. Thanks for reaching out. Thanks for the message and thanks for subscribing. I hope you enjoy our other beautiful. bonus show, Jackson Bailey Spooks. Oh, that's true.

So, yeah, you can do all of that at sanspansradio.com or directly through the Apple podcast app. Otherwise, on that note, I've been Joel. I've been Jackson. And I've also been Joel. Both you're welcome and sorry. Yeah, I hope we've been good stepdad.

Yeah, exactly. Is this what you want? They're like, oh, a stepdad episode. Oh, no. What the fuck am I doing with my life? They fucked this one. Or maybe they nailed this one. I don't know.

I don't know what I want out of this podcast, yeah, nor us, see, nor us. Fuck, dude. Smell you later. and Ryan podcast and people right across Canada, they listen to our show. Now, Stacey and Marley, you guys are sisters and pretty competitive. Can you tell us who listens more? Oh, it's definitely me. No.

We will text each other through the day saying, hey, have you listened to the pod yet? So it's something that even we talk about as sisters, what was talked about on the pod. So when you're finished listening to this legendary podcast, check out us, Tony and Ryan.