Podcast About List - Ep. 144 - My cob BUSSIN!!!

Episode Date: May 5, 2021

cobway eat cob www.patreon.com/podcastaboutlist

You're listening to Israel's number one podcast. That counts to the mob list. You're being a crap monster. And may the fourth be with. May the fourth. That's a powerful duster, dude. May the microphone. It's going to be great for anyone who listens for the first time.

is just the first time people that are going to be annoyed by that. Nobody else would be annoyed. Everybody else is used to you being a fucking dumbass. Oh, dumbass. Hi, my name is. What? Oh, my God. Real dumb ass.

Real ass, dumbass. Yep. How are you feeling? Pat, how's your leg? My leg, uh, not great. SpongeBob reference. Yeah, can you do this, Spongewaw boys? My leg!

Are you looking at... Did you get that high on the computer duster? No, Joe texted me and said, Can the microwave bandit, please clean it out? Are you the microwave bandit, dude? I don't... I don't know if that's me. Two months in, and you already have...

You already have a nickname at the apartment? I was going to say it's got to be you, but I think about the people you're living with, I don't think... Right. I think that's a... I think that's a 25, 25, 25, 25, 25... Right.

Yeah, those are the microwave brothers. I think it's 30, I think it's 33 each right now because Joe is claiming there's a microwave band. Okay, but would that be the best move? Whoever fucking smelt it, dealt it, dude, with easiest trick in the book. Let's call him, let's call him, right? That's what OJ did. Remember that? What?

He killed his wife, and then he's like, somebody killed my wife. He killed his wife, but he said, whoever smelt it, Delta. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, when the cops found her body and the waiter's body fucking beheaded. They were like, oh, dude, this is not looking good for you, O.J. He's like, ah, whoever smelted and dilted, huh? And they're like, ah, and that's why he's free. That's actually why he's free.

Robert Kardashian. That was the defense that they used. Yeah, the defenses. They tried the glove. Didn't work. I guess whoever smelt it, dealt it in the situation. Christ. Yeah, you hear the jury go,

is whoever smelt it, delt it, Bs, whiz. Anyway. Has that defense ever worked in a court of law? If somebody listens to this and their lawyer and they know of a case. Not just a lawyer, a lawyer slash historian. Yeah.

The most likely person to listen. A lawyer historian, can you tell us if whoever, smelt it delta defense worked you know i could probably give you an answer on that right now i think probably not i think no okay i don't know you were a lawyer historian i don't think so

this is well to use a law to this is conjecture here's the thing whoever did the rhyme did the crime did the crime which is kind of when you think about it kind of a kind of a It's kind of paradoxical.

Your Honor, whoever is the judge did the stuff. Take him away. Whoever did the kill Vince the bill. Oh, okay. I would introduce you the new. My defense rests.

Your honor. Your honor. Whoever is in the jury did something scurry. Who ever turn to Who else is in that damn courtroom Whoever is the plaintiff surely ain't it Your Honor This guy did not act fly

whoever is the bailiff shall pay this bailiff you're up you're going to have to favor this pocket ticket should have picked a different job if your name is Michael Michael guilty you are guilty

Your Honor If you're Your Honor, I believe the lawyer gets to go sit in the foyer Because I'm tired Now that you've seen all the pieces Can we take a recess? It's a rhyme in court Lawyers get paid so much

They should have to speak and rhyme Yeah, dude. Absolutely, dude. What about like a lawyer cipher? You know, it's just, it's just the defense. You're kind of a battle wrap between the defense and the offense. Yeah, that's a good idea. Your Honor, it seems the witness is the one who did this.

See, that one, that one's too good. That one actually might work, yeah. I think all these might work. I think whoever smelt it dealt it is going to be like, like we're going to see like, Supreme Court smelted v. Deltid. The landmark ruling. Mr. Jonathan, Jonathan dealt it. Please approach the bench.

The case of, the case, Hugh smelt it, Jonathan dealt it. Hugh smelt it. Hugh ever. Smelt it. Okay. Oh. Dude, that just spent about an entire red thunder's worth of energy right there.

Yeah. We're about seven minutes in. Oh, man. Yeah, so that's unlucky. How's your leg? You've hurt yourself so badly. Yeah. I did a skateboard trick that I have not landed since I was 17.

I already talked about this on my appearance on seeking derangements yesterday. Oh, okay. Yeah, we can't talk about, yeah. Oh, sorry, do you get paid to do that show, or do you get paid to do this fucking show? All right, so I fucking spit it out. He's doing a, doing a backboneless, when you go up the quarter pipe. I'll say you're back boneless. Kick the board into your hand.

Doesn't even respond too afraid. No, I'm not going to, I'll put a bone in your back. I'll not even going to fucking humor that. I'll put a bone in your back, my boner. So I was trying that. My phone are all the way up your spine. I landed on the board. It'll unlock all your vertebrae.

bray like yeah oh man yeah you're gonna it's gonna hurt so bad with my boner when i put it in your back okay continue i landed on the board i'm gonna give you meningitis when i put my men inside you that's how far up your spot i'm gonna go to i got both feet all the way your brain stem my leg slipped out ramp was kind of a quarter pipe was kind of dirty kind of got a lot of like yeah i'll get a Quarter of it. My dirty bite. All right, that was good. But, yeah, got dirt on it, and I slipped out, uh, fucking...

I won't slip out. I won't slip out fucking... I fell onto my leg. It went at, like... I'll fall onto your leg. Don't. It hurts. Okay, never mind. That's retracted.

Yeah, it went down. But I won't retract it. I heard it. heard two pops heard you very distinct pops in my leg. And I hear two cops that are with me fucking spit roasting you. What?

Bring a couple cops over. Why? Fuck you. The only guys I know. All cops. Yeah, I heard two pops and then I called Caleb and I was like... You heard two bach because I'm going to be very late.

I heard two pops in my leg sat down for a little bit and then like I walked away from the skate park because I didn't want anyone to see me. calling my friend to be like hey can you come get me I got hurt yeah you called the first thing the first thing I did when I like fell is like I looked at my leg saw that it was like like on the ground like slanted and I looked up and just went I'm so old that's a good kind of keeping your composure thing yeah is that big thing at the

skate park is if you die you have to pretend that you're fine yeah uh so The more you explain it, the better it sounds, you know. So I got up, I walked a little bit away from the skate park, sat down, called K. No, I walked to this, like, I walked to this, like, skate spot. So I was sitting by myself at this, like, spot that's been in videos. And I was like, okay, no one's going to see me here. And then immediately a dude walks by on a skateboard or dude, like holding a skateboard. I'm like, oh, now this guy's going to think I hurt myself skating this big spot by myself,

like a fucking dumb ass. I look even more stupid than fucking up at a skate park. So I left. I walked more down the... I walked farther down the street than called Caleb

and was like, hey, you can come pick me up. And Caleb's like, I'm getting a tattoo right now. Yeah, I was getting... I was in the middle of getting tattooed. And it hurts so bad. So I'm like the ditch of my arm

inside. It was hurting so bad. Oh, yeah, you were in pain. Oh. No, I almost was like... Hey, man. And my friend hurt himself, can I leave? I was so close to just saying that because it hurt me so bad.

Well, if you did, I wouldn't have had to spend like $40 on Uber rides. Yeah, I would have just had to spend $40 to get back home. You would have been on the sidewalk for like two hours. I was in Greenpoint. That's true. Okay. I didn't know that. I had to go get my car and shit.

Yeah. So I called an Uber and then went to like an urgent care. And I walked into the urgent care. Like, I got out. I'm, like, drenched in fucking sweat. And I just walk in. There's a lady putting, like, a sign up, like, no mask, no entry. And then, like, I go, I open the door.

She's like, hi, how can I help you today? And I just went, knee. Did you think knee was, like, like, heart attack? Where if you say it, they have to take you back immediately? Well, she immediately understood because I was limping. True. I guess that's, you should have just said heart attack. That's like something...

Yeah, you should, like, walking in with, like, you have, like, a nail in your face, and you're just, like, heart attack, please. The thing is, there's only so many opportunities that you get to, like, walk into, like, a doctor or a hospital or something and just say one word, like, in pain like that. Like, you can't go in there and be, like, like, your infection. Like, they won't fly. You really have to just take those opportunities whenever you can. Yeah, so I just sat down and took, like, she was like, okay, can I get, like, your ID and your insurance card?

And I just went, huh? Dude, I've been making some insane noises now that I'm like, dude, I woke up this morning, I was just like trying to, or I have this like, like, this thing on my bed. Yeah, the poof. Yeah, no, it's the, it's the Falcon Heen balloon. Yeah, it looks like the Falcon Heen balloon. Speaking of this thing, I watched the Anthony Weiner documentary and in like the first, like, he has this same exact thing in his child's bedroom. That makes sense. So this is my pillow from Anthony Wiener.

Thank you, Anthony, for helping me in this trying time. Yeah, you found that, you found that pillow online because you Googled Wiener's Child. Come on, why couldn't you have just given me Wiener pillow? Child Wiener. I was looking up, Child Wiener. And you hit the comfortable, comfortable child wean. Then you hit shopping. Documentary video

And then you had shopping That was the first result That was not That's how you got it Dude this morning it's not like I was trying to like get my leg Like the pillow I guess I kicked it off the bed

In my sleep And I didn't know So I was trying to like get up So I could get the pillow And keep it elevated Yeah And I like Moved my leg over to the bed

And I moved it in the same direction I fell on it So like It obviously just fucking hurt and I just, like, it sounded like I inhaled a Wilhelm scream. It was like... You're making funny noises? Yeah, like involuntarily just, like, yelping at a certain point.

Like, I'll step on it weird and just go like... I, this morning, I made a funny noise because it's like... Got your ass. Okay, all right. Are you done? Are you done? I'm going to take that as a yes. I made a funny noise.

Out of your ass. Is it over? Can we stop now? Can I finish my story? I made a funny noise. Out of your ass. Never mind. I went,

Gag, yeah, gaj, yeah. Okay. Why did you do that? Because I woke up and I hit my arm right on the tattoo on the corner of my couch because I just sleep on the couch. I'm like, aga, yeah, yeah. And I was like, what the fuck? Because otherwise I will goo all over everything.

because it seeps goo. Dude, it's so cool how it seeks goo. I've never, you know, I've never gotten a tattoo. I love the goo. I love the goo. I sleep. I line myself out over every surface in my house. Yeah, just to get the goo everywhere. Your house a tattoo.

Exactly. Yeah, get a perfect imprint. I almost got one of those things. It's like a fucked up wrap that you put on your shit. And then you just don't touch it. But then you have to peel it off. And people say it's like peeling your skin off. That's awesome.

That sounds awful. Peeling your skin off is the best thing in the world. Yeah. Dude, do you ever do the old glue thing? Like the glue on the hand? And you peel it off. You ever try to get it in one fell swoop? It's the best.

A whole hand imprint thing. Of glue? I have weird friends. My friendship are criminals. You never did the glue thing? I'm done with you two right now. No, you're not. First you said something about my ass.

First of all, that's off limits to you, bud. Your ass is on limits. me and cam's ass is to be decided whether what limit i have on his ass you find out pretty soon pretty soon yeah i'm gonna take you to your limit i'll say yeah i'm gonna push your ass to the limit guys i'm gonna push it to the limit i was talking to Caleb I'm gonna go Corbin blue on that ass push that shit to the limit right now Corbin blue corbin blue push it push it to the limit that's what I'm gonna do with your ass see you knew the song Are you fucking kidding me?

I know. I was just commenting on how I have not heard about Corbyn Blue in a bit. I don't remember asking you. What is he up to? What's Corbin Blue? If I had to guess... He was executed by military tribunal. Yeah.

He saw Hillary Clinton being hanged in Guantanamo. I feel like the move for... For all those people, they either do TikTok now or they own a restaurant. Yeah. Or they're real estate agents. They're like... Who goes real estate agents? estate. Pro skaters go real estate.

Oh, that's not a pro skater. We're not talking... Corbyn Blue is a pro jumper, dude. He's a fucking jumpro master. I feel like Disney Channel star, and depending on the Disney Channel star and pro skater, no, I think you just like talking about pro skaters. No. I think you're trying to justify it right now.

No, Disney Channel star, they either, they grow up to be the most fucked up actor of all time. Or yeah, they do like, you know, a restaurant or something. Or they're dead, but like, they're technically alive, but they just might as well be Yeah, yeah, because they don't have a damn Twitter. They don't got any... Yeah, I'm with you there. Dude, the reason that the Nickelodeon Gack is so green and vibrant is because it contains the souls of all the children who are acting on those sets, dude.

True, just a bunch of skulls. Yeah. If you act really close. Do you guys think I should get facial implants like this? That would be displants. You can make the face, too. You don't need the implant. If you can show what kind of face, you know what I mean?

big-ass head, they'd have to use, like, Robert Zadar implants. You would end up looking like that. You have a big-ass fucking freak chin. I do. Dude, if my chin was, like, huge, like, huge, like, a, like a big... Did you get a Thanos chin? Yeah. What would you do with it?

I would fucking, I'd be cutting glass. I would be, I would be, I would be just hitting people on the street with it. I'd eat pussy with it, put the chin in her butt. Yeah. Have you heard about this? Have you heard about this? I got my chin all the way up your ass. It's kind of a cool move, right?

Maybe that's why Jay Leno skyrocketed to the top of independent. That's why he wears so much denim. Yeah, all the women in charge of entertainment in the 70s, he would just, he would eat them out, put his, what's it called? His chin in their ass. Forget the word for chin. His chin dough. Yeah. And then it felt like she was fucking getting eaten out on a bicycle.

which has got to be the dream for anyone I mean if you, when you got a chin like that, you got to wear that much denim. Yeah. Why? When Jay Leno, when Jay Leno walked into the office wearing bike pedals on his hips. Yeah. They knew.

They knew what the interns were getting into, dude. That's in the oral history of SNL book. All that shit. That's in the oral history. It's a different book. Dude, I was getting. I didn't, so I wouldn't got tattoos for the first time in a long time, and I forgot that whenever I enter a tattoo shop, it's like, I get, I get super nervous, I feel like, like, a little

kid, and so I, I, as, especially because the guy who's tattoo him, he's this, like, fucking cool-ass Italian guy, like, from Italy, Italians, from Rome, and, uh, he's one, he's, like, so Italian that he can let, he has, like, box braids, and it looks, like, normal to me. Like, I was like, yeah, okay, that's fine. Yeah. Like a white guy with box braids? But he's not white. He's like, he looks like he's from, he looks like he was like stuck in a statue and then

they like cracked it like an egg and he popped down. He's like, my name is Simone. Okay. It's got, that kind of thing. And he was tattooing me and I sort of dripped. My hand was sweating so much that I dripped a bunch of sweat all over his dick because he was like holding my arm and my hand was, it was like I just like juiced a lemon with my hand. It was just, like, dripping onto him.

And I was like, hey, man, sorry. And he was just like, no problem. That's the thing. It's always, the tattoos. The tattoos are always just like the, like, the coolest people in the world. Like, what you would, as a teenager, you would imagine, just like, oh, that's the coolest guy ever. And then you walk in and, like, they put, like, a, can I get, can I get Yoda on my arm? They put, like, a pain machine into you.

And then you just have to stand there, like, just staring straight ahead, like, like, gritting your, yeah, just pretend. Yeah, I'm just pretending it doesn't like It hurts, I'm just like, dude, this is sick, dude, thank you. Dude, yo, this is so cool. And then you pay him $1,000 at the end. Yeah, and I, at one point, he took a cigarette break like every 10 minutes. He was going and like rolling his own cigarettes outside.

And he came back in, and it was on, you know, he tattoos you on like a hospital bed. And on that lining they put on there, I saw there was a giant sweat stain in the shape of my ass. So I just, like, sweat through my underwear and my cargo pants onto this table. And then I just was like, so, I was just hoping so badly he wouldn't notice it that as he walked back in, I was like, hey, Simone, sorry about this. I must have spilled my water.

It's like clearly in the shape of my ass cheeks. That's the thing. It's the coolest people seeing you with the most vulnerable. Exactly. It's like, for me, I can, like, sit well for it. Like, I'm not, I won't, like, freak out or anything. But the cost of sitting well is that I'll just be completely empty-minded. just like staring straight, it's vacuous.

And they'll be like, oh, man, like, that's a cool shirt. I saw that band once. I always be like, uh, uh, yeah. It was like having, like, your, your surgeon be like, Anton Chigur, where you, you're like, I don't want to fuck this up so badly. Yeah, yeah, because it's like, if you say, if you say the wrong thing, they're going to fuck up your tattoo on purpose. Just, just do a Z.

Just scribble all over. Yeah, you wanted a swastika, right? Oh, no. Uh, no. But yeah, that was, that hurt so bad. So, yeah, I've always been, when did you get hurt this week? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, get hurt this week?

Mm-hmm. I spilled water on my bed covers earlier today. That hurt my mind pretty bad. Oh, fuck you. No, that's, that's pretty bad. Caleb and I are, you know, experiencing real pain and you're just like, oh, I was hurt. Oh, my wah-wah. Oh, I spilled my wawa.

I was hurt when my friends refused to, um, respond to my messages. I responded to your messages last night. Caleb is the only one who didn't respond to you. Yeah, let me just scroll through my entire text history, and we'll see about that. I'm going to turn on read receipts just to make you feel worse. Yeah?

Yeah, I'm going to turn those on so that every time you guys text me, I don't respond. I know that you're checking your phone every time, and you're just, like, lying down, and you don't want to stand up because you're imagining something really beautiful to you. Aw, that's a very sweet. Yeah, that's very sweet.

You're imagining like some, female crash bandicoot character or something so you can't move like i'm gonna lose i'm gonna lose this this fifth boner this fifth of a boner that i have if i if i move my fingers and right the first time because i get five in a row no problem it's like a fucking slots machine dude five boners and i'm in a row five years in a row good job okay i actually get i actually get extremely strong boners and once every 10 times that i look at my penis i'm like that's not that bad? I think I've hit my penis too many times for me to...

You hit it? What? Like you're playing knockout? You're just fucking... You know, you fall down on it and... Yeah, you know, you start... How big is your penis and you're falling down on your penis? My penis is, like, almost completely gone during the day. This is another fucking

skateboarding thing, but I'll get hit in the penis with my skateboard sometimes. The penis, not the balls? Yeah, if I get hit in the penis and not the balls, it doesn't hurt. My balls hang like bats and my penis. Does that happen to you guys? I don't get hit in the penis

were balls very often, so I don't really know. Like, I've been hitting the balls before. I would imagine that it would hurt, I would imagine that getting hit in the dick hurts less than the balls, but I mean, way less. Maybe I've just never been hitting the balls hard enough for it to hurt. That's a problem we can solve.

Oh, well, now I'm too scared to try it. Yeah, Caleb, have you always had that slingshot duct tape to your hand? Yes. And I'm coming for you. It's going to be like it follows. Going over to Patrick's house with like a dress shoe but on the toe of the shoe there's like a boxing glove pointing up standing behind him on the train and just sticking your foot out between his feet.

Yeah. Pressing a little button. Maybe what if I just don't have, what if I don't have nerves in my penis? What if you don't have nuts in your penis? Dude, that's probably true. You probably have no feeling at all in there and you haven't realized till now. Yeah. You have an empty bag, admit it.

I do. It's like a scala. cap it is yeah i know trust me i know well if it's it why the fuck can i just get like a hole in it like a kangaroo and keep some shit in there you know keep it's gonna be yeah if you get like testicular cancer they should be able to like you have to take both of them out they should let you like they take your balls out you should be able to their cancer you should be able to get you should be able to get like a transparent sack like one of those clear backbacks yeah Like a clear backpack or like a zipper on it.

But it would look, but still have the veins. And they fall into the toilet and they're just gone forever. You would, it's the transparent that it should still have veins like a fish. You know, you can sometimes see inside of a fish. Yeah, I want to replace, I want to replace my penis skin with chameleon skin. That'd be really cool. Have it blend in. Yeah, I could change it to the color of my pants.

Yeah. That's not a bad idea, dude. Yeah. A little ball talk. If it falls out, no one can tell. Exactly. They go, what's that strange extra pocket on your pants? Oh, nothing.

Oh, nothing. I just keep two of my most favorite things in there. Have you seen that, that, that, uh, speaking of blending penises, there's the transition. Have you seen that, uh, that C3PO Tops card from the 70s that it looks like he has a giant boner? No, it's just like a, like, uh, porn hidden in a Disney. A may the fourth be with you. It's, yeah. Well, I mean, I can, I can talk about it today.

True. I guess if there was one day where you could do this. No, you have to get to the list. You wasted it. Look up, uh, C3PO. You spent someone whining about your fucking leg and your, and your, and your empty balls. Look at it.

You have no more, no more Star Wars talk. That's it. C3PO Golden Rod. I will look this up, actually. You can see his, his thing. It looks like he's got a giant boner. I guess it was like, oh man that's just nasty oh that's fucked up dude no that's wrong brother i don't like that at all

i guess like a piece fell off of him while they were taking the photo yeah his damn piece yeah i mean look at that dude he's packing yeah yeah he almost touches this it almost touches his elbow that's he's i mean further proof that c3PO is gay big ass dick if having a big penis makes you gay 100% dude okay i can get behind that. Girls hate big penises. Gay guys love them. So, guys with big penises are like, I would say it's like a

70, 30 split, gay straight. Okay. The bigger your penises. And then like, that is, that is something I would never do research into and would believe. Yeah. And then the straighter you are, the smaller your penises. Because like the straightest thing ever is those guys who like fucking

have really small penises and they never use them and they fuck like toy trucks and shit. That's the straightest guy in the universe Well, there's like all No, there's like really gay guys With really tiny penises No, they're faking

Those guys made a choice The ones with the big dicks They had no choice in that If you had a small dick And you're gay, you made a hard, hard choice Okay Yeah Top 10 best vegetables

From the top tens.com It's like being a great Jedi Yeah, anyway, top 10 best vegetables By the user Freddy Godzilla Whoa Pretty cool name Freddy Gibbs Oh my God, Freddy Gibbs

Wait, here's his about page Freddy Godzilla This is the whole thing I live and end well My favorite sport is football My favorite food is meat, L-O-L. No way the guy His favorite food is meat

Makes the top 10 best vegetables Freaking food is meat Where's the top 10 best meat list? All right, well let's do that ourselves Hamburger Hot dog Egg dog eggs There we go

Hamburger in the frying pan Eggs is not meat. Hamburger in the frying pan Eggs is dairy Are bones meat? Yeah No In bones

Bones aren't meat Bones marrow Are he's hair meat Meat? Bone marrow Mero that's meat Then bones are fucking meat, dude No

A hot dog is bun on top You still say that a hot dog is meat Hot dog is a bone, too Hot dog is not a bone It is It comes from the pig's leg Why do you think it's shaped like that Fucking idiot

Why do you think they're all tied together Why do you think that Those are the different bones Tied together No You don't know anything about dogs You can tie anything together You don't know anything about hot dogs

What do you think the bun is That's the skin from the leg The skin is bread The skin goes over the bone The hot dog bun is bread. Did you ever take biology? No. Why do you think they boil the hot dogs?

It makes them nice and soft. Exactly. Boiled bones. Everyone likes boiled bones. That's like a demigloss. Boiled bone. Boiled bones. You guys ever had boiled bones growing up?

No. I did. I never touched a boiled bone. Dude, after you strain them in the colander, God. Have you ever had the bone marrow? Pasta tastes so good after you strain it in the colander. No cap. That's the best one.

It doesn't have all that nesty water crap on it and you just get the pasta. Oh, man. That hits different. Dude, when you straighten the red sauce out of the pasta, it hits different. Sheesh. Sheesh.

Sheesh. Sheesh. Here's what's really busting to me. Plain white rigatoni. Salt pepper. Uncooked. I eat straight out the box. I put the water in.

I pour the water out. That's bussing to me. My food buss and challenge. My food buss and challenge. Number one most bustinous potato or vegetable is a potato. Five stars for potatoes. They're the best. So soft and can be chopped easily in half.

It's just so good. I'm going to explode from that goodness. Have you guys so nice to chop us something easily in half. That's one of the best parts of food. Have you guys, that's true like action. Bronson talking about food? Have you guys watched Rock of Love at all? No.

Oh, man. Every time Brett Michaels is like in a situation with a woman where she's like, oh, Brett, you want to go like back to your room? Ha ha. Just kidding. They'll cut to like a talking head of him like being interviewed. And he's like, I'm just about ready to explode. It is. I do wish that those shows were like Big Brother or something where you get to see.

them have sex. Yeah, they always cut it out. Yeah. Come, just a lot of you see Brett Michaels' penis. In that show, I think the trade-off is you get to hear a lot about Brett Michael's type-one diabetes. True. That is as intimate also as seeing someone have sex. Is learning about their diabetes?

The first episode of that show, or the first three episodes within that range, they have to practice phone sex with him because he's going to be on tour a lot. So he's going to, yeah, he's going to, you get like a gold star or whatever for doing the best phone sex with him. And they, uh, he has like a doctor that's just a fat guy in a lab coat. And he hooks something up to his penis to, like, he hooks his penis up to a computer so he can test whether or not he's getting a boner from the phone sex. Wow. He needs a, he needs a, he needs a scientist to tell if he's getting a boner. Yeah. Well, how strong of a boner, how strong of a boner he gets.

But they can't say all that nasty crap on TV, right? It's got to be a lot of bleeps. There's a lot of bleeps, and there's a lot of, yeah. Maybe some innuendo? Uh-huh. I hate innuendo. I like the normal crap. I like endo.

Yeah, give me that normal endo. Give me that exoendo. I don't need no innuendo. Give me the exoendo. Shit's weird. Yeah, potatoes are pretty good, though. Me loves them. They make you fat, but so does McDonald's.

And does anyone give a scruffy turd about that? This sounds like Smeagle. What? Me loves them! That sounded like Smeagle. So I hereby declare this potato day, and we shall feast on potatoes until we cannot anymore. Me loves potato. Check this one out.

I like all the vegetables in the world. If I see any vegetable, I would want it, unless it came from the floor or someone's mouth. I'm a vegetable addict, you see. That's why I like all of them in the world. I think vegetables are pretty tight. They are tasty and contains zero. percent sugar well apart from sweet potatoes they're a starchy vegetable and you can also use them for beauty benefits cut slices of potatoes and place them in your eyes leave them there for 20 to 30 minutes

and see the results place them in your eyes put under the eyelid have you have you ever done like gotten potatoed like like a juice from a potato in your eye it sucks no i knew a friend of mine grown up his dad had cancer and he started he was like to solve my cancer i will only eat raw potatoes and they just died like a million times faster oh that sucks i love potatoes they're so delicious and you can have them in so many ways chips hash brown mashed boiled with butter and in garland isn't that mashed potatoes no boiled and and and and pressed with butter and garlic okay yeah you press them all until they're like a real creamy press oh all right so that's a Boiled potato.

Yeah. Oh, no, wait, yeah. No, you can have boiled. I've had boiled potatoes, I'm realizing just now. Potatoes equals French fries. And for you, couch potatoes, potato chips. Oh. Finally, my brothers and sisters are recognized in the light of the top tens.

I don't fuck with potatoes, dude. What? This is it. These are not ketosis. Yeah. I'm trying to keep my entire body in ketosis, even one single job. drop of anti-keto matter such as potatoes will throw me out of ketosis and put me into a just a downward spiral.

So I can't even fucking touch with, I can't fuck with potatoes right now. I'm off of those, yeah. You know, it's great. Ever since you look at one and you can't eat it because it reminds you of your own head, right? Well, that's a little bit of part of it, yeah. Ketosis is about eating things that look as far away from you as possible. Yeah? Yeah, so I eat a lot.

I eat crayons a lot. No carbs in a crayon. Is that, it was just a rumor, right? That I eat crayons? My uncle started that if you eat a crayon, your changes your poop color. Of course it changes your poop color. What, are you stupid?

You can't digest a crayon? Yeah, but it would just come out in crayon chunks. It wouldn't change the whole poop. Well, you wouldn't, have you ever melted a crayon? Yeah. Made a crayon candle? Yeah. You've never done that.

I've never done that. I know what he's ever done that. You guys ever melt crayon? together into, like, one big crayon. Like, you take all the, you take the paper up the crayons, and you melt them together, and it's like a multicolored crayon. Yeah, you have hot shit in your stomach that'll melt a crayon, no problem. Probably five or six seconds flat, I guess.

The dye wouldn't retain in your poop. Why? Have you ever fucking, do you think, I mean, I can't believe you right now. Have you ever eaten a beat? It'll make your shit purple. If you eat red broken glass, your shit will be red. Well, that's from the glass. Yeah, exactly.

We need to send you on a, on a, you need to eat more stuff. You're going to make me eat a crayon. Yeah, I'm going to send you on an idiot abroad style adventure where you have to crayon, you have to eat crayons, you have to eat glue, you're going to eat paper, and it's mostly, that's like maybe two minutes of the show. The rest of the show is a deep dive on your shit. I'm going to get a scientist, he's going to test it. We're going to get color experts. We're going to hook it up to the same machine from Rock of Love.

Yeah, and he's going to, he's going to let you know if you pooped or not. Yeah, he's going to say, yeah, well, you poop. is looking very sexually excited, sir. Number two is corn. Who doesn't love corn? I was about to vote for potatoes. I found some corn in my number two. Those are also super good.

And then I saw corn. It served so good on the cob and it's super healthy. Corn is sweet and delicious and it's the reason why I like vegetables. I would probably have 10 cavities in my mouth if it weren't for corn, which I learned to love more than Sour Patch kids. Here's what I'm going to say. It might be controversial. Every food would be better on the cob

You know what? No, that's not controversial at all I think a lot of people would agree with that Really? Uh-huh Dude, can you imagine gummy bears on the cob Or fucking like hamburger on the cob Dude, it would also be really great Because I mean everybody with braces would starve and die

Exactly, yeah, you eliminate the worst kind of people Uh-huh, these weak youth dudes Yeah, people who listen to what an orthodontist tells them Exactly. Yeah. You were cowardly enough to take advice from a fake dentist. He couldn't even be a dentist. He couldn't make it, dude. Half dentists have fucking mechanic. That's what you are. You're cucked by the guy trying to make your mouth a robot. Yeah. Meanwhile, I'm over here. The mad scientist who's in there trying to put a fucking Apple Watch in your mouth.

I'm eating popcorn. I'm eating now and later. I'm eating fucking... A dentist is a doctor that couldn't fucking cut it. And orthodontist is another rung lower than that. It's pathetic. Yeah. It's like a gym teacher trainer. Exactly. The assistant to a gym teacher. Yeah. Think about all the shit you can't eat with braces.

Tootsie roll. Tootsie rolls suck anyway. Well, the fruit ones are good. No, bad candy. You really like tootsie rolls? I don't like chocolate tootsie rolls, but I like the... You like Tootsie Rolls, so. That's like maybe one of the worst candies of all time.

Yeah, I'm with you. The green Tootsie Roll is pretty good. Like literally, like, maybe bottom three. No, no, no, no. Chocolate tootsie rolls are bad, but, like, the fruit-flavored ones kind of good. You're pissing me off so much today. I'm about to lose it. I'm about to fucking lose it right now.

Shut up! With the tootsie rolls. Shut the fuck up, dude. Hey, let me see that. That's right. No! That was your first example, too. That was like, oh, think about all the great foods you can't eat with braces.

Tootsie roll. What are you taught? On the cob? Tootsie roll? We're talking about corn on the cob, first of all. And then, you know, like, what, you can't eat popcorn, too? Popcorn's way better than Tootsie Rolls. Chicken breast on the cob.

It'd be so good. I mean, it has, if you eat a wing, a wing is on the cob. Dude, shworma on the cob, that fucking writes itself. Swarma straight off the spit. Yeah. He's eating the fucking shwar. Yeah, you're on the cob. Yeah.

That's on the cob, dude. Yeah, you know what? I'll take back what I'll backpedal. I'll take back what I said about to the. He wants they figure out how to put drinks on the cob, it's over. It's over, dude. It's over for food. I'm only going to be having drinks.

Yeah. Sorry, dude. Drinks are just better. I like drinks more. It's a lot less work to have. Water on the cob. Not what, okay, so that's his weird is going tootsie roll first. It's delicious.

Beer on the cob. What? No, water on the cob is better. So would like a, like a, like a popsicle, is that? No, well, first of all, it's not a drink. It's solid. I would, if I handed you a popsicle and I said, this is juice. You'd say, no, it's not as a popsicle.

Okay, if you said it was juice on the cob. No, the cop, the water, or the beer cob needs to have some sort of gravity cop. Yeah, it's liquid. That has, that retains the, it has its own orbit and the beer would have a drink, the cob. Okay, so it. And it is still a corn cob also. Okay, so it's a gravity cob. The gravity cob, Caleb invention, not a big deal.

It happens. They come and go. and you hold a beer with it Wait, okay It would be like a fair food It'd be like a turkey leg You walk around with a beer cob So is turkey leg chicken on the cob

No, that's on the bone I have a new invention I want to I want to The cob conversation is frustrating I don't care about that I don't care how frustrated you are I don't care My new invention I'm moving

I'm moving forward with I think Coca-Cola freestyle machines still have a lot of potential Cobb freestyle machine Oh my gosh There's a bunch of different circles of the different foods. You know, I can be like, oh, I want corn and I also want, you know, beef. An egg.

Scrambled egg on the cop. Exactly. And it has every, you could, it's linked up to Wikipedia. So anything in the food category is fair game. Yeah. It makes it or it orders it. If you, you know, if you pick something you don't have it in stock, if you're like a crazy person, you're like, oh, I want, I want kangaroo on the cob. Like you're trying to add crazy.

It will automatically order it with an Amazon button. I, Cameron, there's an immediate flaw in your problem. Yeah, what is it? And you're in your, in your cob free stuff. No, no, if it's hooked up to Wikipedia, you have to limit it to the food section. That's what I said. I said anything that's under the food category. Yeah, I missed that completely.

Man, if you were in an investor's meeting, your head would be chopped off by that woman from Bill, Kill Bill, Bill. Yeah, we'd throw you out of the damn window. Mr. Wonderful's wife would fucking run her boat into you, dude. I was just thinking of a situation where somebody gets like, I don't like, new restaurant, new restaurant, Darth Vader on the cob or like, set up. Like Subway, you can choose anything. Hitler on a Cobb, I know what you're saying. Cobway.

Cobway. Oh, Italian herbs and Cobb. Mm-hmm. That might be a pretty good cobs. You can pick, too. CMT. At the end, you finish your CMT sandwich, right? And then you forgot, oh, because here's a problem with bread.

You can't reuse the bread after you eat it. Well, that's one thing, but also you see the bread, and it never surprises you. You never get a flavored bread, and you're like, oh, shit. Like, I just remember that I got Italian herbs and cheese. If you get an Italian herbs and cheese cob, you've sucked all the salami and ham and fucking lettuce and tomato off that thing. You get to the bottom. You're like, dude, I got Cobb to suck.

I can suck this Cobb dry. You can't do the Cobb back. You get a discount when you reuse the Cobb. You can't do that at Subway. If you get a sub-at-sub-and-you-just out of the bread and you bring the bread back, they're going to kick you out. That's a restaurant that will have to happen after the COVID-19. If you keep coming up with shit, I'm going to fucking put you on the Cobb, Pat.

Look, I'm trying, I'm just trying to make sure the shit works. I have a new subway spinoff, okay? Even better. This is different from the Cobb, okay? No more Cobb. I don't like this so far. No more Cobb. Okay, but you're going to like this.

Okay. Imagine the traditional subway counter. Uh-huh. It's reversed. All the ingredients are facing you. The cashier is shielded from it. They're all in. That's pretty good.

You know, I'll give you that idea for free. But no, you don't need bread. You can eat them right there, right out of the trough. Slop way. Okay, because the best thing in the world is eating the cold cut straight out of the fridge. Exactly. And even better than eating a cold cob cut crate, the trough. A crazy cob crot.

Okay. What about a subway-style restaurant where you are the person making the subs, but then and the people who work there on the other side and you get paid for it and they come and order stuff no so they're on the other side of a plate glass like a zoo right but they're still like the exit part but you have to escape and if you escape it's free if they catch you pay for it okay here's my idea all right it's like that it's like you described there in like a plate glass too you make whatever sandwich you want and they have to eat it oh my god that's really good yeah ranch dressing and buffalo sauce on a wrap actually that's a pretty good you're gonna hate that you're gonna hate that you're gonna hate that you're You're going to hate that so much with chicken with chicken? I'm realizing there's only good ingredients at Subway, dude. Olives and mustard, I'll fucking eat that any time. Well, here's the thing you can bring in your own ingredients, too. Ah, the poop cob.

Wait, are Cobbs still involved? I may have lost it. It's kind of like, I think maybe we're looking too far in the Subway model. I think we need to look at the Cece's pizza model. What if we get like, what if we make a city and we just have a bunch of different types of subways? we can use all our different subway type ideas and Coke freestyle ideas and Cobb ideas. We could call it Cobb City. I guess we could.

I don't know. I don't really have it in me to do something that big. I was thinking like a single restaurant. Maybe we franchised it out later. We were in like New Mexico, Arizona, Texas, California. Well, have you heard of Celebration, Florida? Every time I go to Florida, it's a celebration, bud. I don't know about you.

Well, Celebration Florida is a town owned by Disney. Hot Miami women. what? Disneyland's a town? Yeah, Celebration. It's where a lot of the, it's like some of the employees live there. First, a land, then a world, and now a town. Yeah. They're really backwards.

They're falling off. Yeah, come on, dude. Yeah, Celebration Florida is a house of mouse. Yeah. It's a census designated. What's next to Mickey Mouse clubhouse, dude? This is, there. They fell off.

Yeah, so this, it was like a, It's a master plan community Located near Disney World It's a... What's next? A Disney store? Civil suit Against Celebration, Florida.

All right, so they're not doing very well, I'm guessing. Yeah. Has there ever been a murder there? I really want to know. Oh, not yet. Yeah. Number three, broccoli. Who, what kind of sicko put broccoli this high?

Broccoli's good. Broccoli was like... Like the, you know the, ah, shit. I tried to think of more vegetables and all that came to my mind was different fruit. I moved the chair too far, and my leg got hurt. You are a whining wiener. Oh, dude, here's a comment. Here's a good comment.

Mmm, little trees of goodness, a perfect fractal, as tasty as it is mathematical. It's Neil de Grass Tice commenting on this list. Here's a good one. I like the stems, but not that weird flow. Like, kid, I'm not eating a bush here. Who likes the stem? The broccoli fluff at the top. The comments are wilding out to put it with Japanese sauce, and you are all said.

Japanese sauce? If you don't like broccoli, I will kill you. You're broccoli fans, weird a.F, I have to say. The broccoli fanship is whiling today. Fanship? What's that, like, those party plates, that have, like, the broccoli and the cauliflower with that, like, ranch dip?

Uh, the ones that... Just a vegetable plate? Yeah, the vegetable plates that people get at, like, Walmart. Yeah. And you bring to... Those go crazy. Such an under-loved vegetable. It tastes like heaven when raw.

Fuck. Ow. You coming, dude? Stop hurting so much. I just saw some sperms jumping up onto the camera. You didn't see any sperm. I saw some... Hey, I'm gonna go on his mouth where I love to go.

Get back in there. Okay, I'm jumping to your mouth. Now? I need to take some ibuprofen. You need to take a Prozac and you need to chill. Yeah. Number four, carrots. No, wait, wait, there's a comment on broccoli in all cap, in all caps that says,

Keeps me regular. Some kind of, some kind of, uh, Mr. Hyde monster comes out when he doesn't eat broccoli. Yeah. Um, carrots. This is probably my number one, dude. Carrots are good. Dude, I used to love eating carrots, and then I'd fucking develop this allergy. And then you took an arrow to the damn knee.

Yeah. God, dude, carrots was, like, just eating carrots, like, baby carrots on their own. It was great. Now I have to take a Zyrtec every time I fucking eat one. But, dude, is it worth it to you? Yeah. Yeah. Come on, that's worth it.

They'd be sleepy for about six hours. Yeah, and I just pop up, like, a fucking Benadriller or Zyrtec. Yeah, there's nothing. and snort a little Benadryl and then down some carrots, carrot dinner. You think snorting Zyrtec? You think that'll, I think that's good? It's probably not good, but you also just inhaled computer duster before we started recording. I didn't inhale it.

You did. You definitely did. You said, I inhaled it a little bit. And then you said, I feel weird. That's really weird. And you started laughing a lot. Yeah. Well, great for my broken eyesight.

And making it into juice or making it in soup is just amazing. Have you ever see, like, the people who just eat, like, only carrots and their skin turns orange? Someone says, uh, what's up, Doc? Hey, yo. Yeah, I had a, I had a, when I was vegan, there was like a, like a summer where I ate probably like six or seven huge carrots a day. And I, they definitely changes the tone of my skin. Yeah, I was a lot more orange than I am now. It's true.

I've been looking at you. Yeah, I'm not. I have almost no orange in me. You're blending in with your wall. I know. I'm, I'm, uh, I'm seriously white now. I'm seriously white. Number five's lettuce.

Lettuce. On a sandwich, they're a miracle. Lettuce is great. Toss it in a salad. It's one of the things you put in the salad. Yeah. Well, you can, you can have like a potato salad. Shut up!

Shut up! I eat lettuce and salad, cheeseburgers, and sandwiches, and so good, so healthy, so crunchy, and so delicious. And then in, like, a dialogue format, me, heart lettuce. I can't even say a heart. Number six, peas. Pee. Pee.

What now? Here's a comment from Cartoon Network fan 1990. And every each word is capitalized individually. Without a doubt, my favorite greens. Peas are a legume, right? Oh, so you let potato slide and corn slide, but you're going to pull out legume for peas? Yeah. You just want to show us you knew that word, dude.

I learned it recently. You're just bragging at this point. You're just fucking bragging. I get it, man. You spend all your time at the library. Here's a really good comment. Little circles. Best green food ever.

I'm not a P-Fit. What about that green ketchup that you used? to have. That's my normal greed for it. Yeah, that was a... The Shrek ketchup? Yeah, the Heinz.

Oh my God, this shit was crazy. The Shrek, the green and then the purple. We've totally talked about it before. We've talked about it before. I forget the name of it. That shit was to die for. Yeah. It's too bad they got rid of it.

No idea why. They should. Oh, yeah. What could have been the problem with that food? They should have red ketchup. Uh-huh. Number seven. Onions.

Patrick, I want you to read this first comment here. onions Blimey that good Caramelized, fried, roasted onions are absolutely the most fantastic vegetables on the planet Please vote onions Now I need to point out

The potatoes are disgusting And should be stripped at their gold spot on this list I just wanted you to say blimey That's all that's you know Yep This guy says Oakers have layers Yo

This person says Anoint ring Yo, anoint ring Oh, anoint ring. Sheesh. Sheesh. Yo, my anoint ring busing.

Sheesh. Oh, I can't get enough of their zingy taste. Just can't. Number eight is cauliflower. I want to read There are two comments in a row here. Here's one comment.

It's a very natural veggie full of Mib. And then a comment that's further up that says, sorry, full of minerals and vitamins. Really good when cooked. A nice, healthy puff. Love the texture.

It's awful. Collieflower, I like cauliflower. No, that was a comment. I love cauliflower. That's a good. That's fried cauliflower. Yeah, that's the snackers delight, dude. That's a potato chip fan's vegetable.

Deep fried cauliflower on like a sandwich. Pretty good. You know, it's not very good? Buffalo cauliflower wings. No, that shit sucks. Shit, it's terrible, dude. But cauliflower wings, fuck off. Get out of here.

But what was that? That fucking sandwich they had at that restaurant I worked at... The cauliflower restaurant? It was called the Sharon, I think. What? Yeah, it was called the Sharon sandwich. And it was really good. It was bomb.

It had cauliflower on it? It had, like, deep-fried cauliflower and, like, this spicy sauce, and they put, like, fried rice noodles on it. Ugh. And it had, like, like, a lime cilantro, cabbage sloth. It's getting worse every second, dude. You got to taste it. I don't.

You got to taste it. I'll take you back there, see if they have it. No, you know what I like? A sandwich from the deli called the gobbler. You like a sandwich called the poop sandwich. Nope, called the gobbler. Oh, the gobbler. The gobbler will take you down, dear.

Is the gobbler, the gobbler's the stuffing and the frame of us? It's a turkey sandwich. It's all it is. gobbler turkey sandwich when i was there that was do you remember when we were both when we both were very ill yeah the gobbler was did that to me dude the gobbler was did that to me dude yep that shit'll turn you to a noodle dude if if it's called the gobbler it's got to be a thanksgiving sandwich i'm gonna put my foot down turkey is a food turkey is a food slice turkey at the deli constantly yeah but that's no it shouldn't be called the gobbler the gobler should be reserved dude you are

insane you're honestly you're fucking crazy people will back me up on you're You've lost it. You've lost your mind. You've lost your ever-loving goddamn white-ass mind. And stop looking at me like that. Stop. Number nine's peppers. Not interesting.

Number 10's Brussels sprouts. Yes. Brussels sprouts are good, dude. Yes. I do not like the way that this person spelled vinegar down here. Not banned. Not banned this one. I have to say.

Uh, which one is that? Is that on Brussels sprouts? Yeah, they said, I love cooked Brussels sprouts, especially with, and they didn't smell or wrong. Yep. Yeah, that's, uh, that's gonna, that's not, that's not the way you write that one. That's a, that's a fail blog right there. Yeah, that's all I'm gonna say.

That person got smart phoned. Yeah, enjoy your time on fail blog. Yeah. Uh, yeah, Brussels sprouts, that is, that is the best vegetable. I feel like I'm... I feel like I'm missing something. Would you guys count mushrooms as a vegetable? No.

Mushrooms are a dirt. That's true, actually. Mushrooms are a type of dirt. They are kind of a type of dirt. Yeah, they're like a, I would say, they're closer to an animal. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Because they're weird. Yeah. Fair. All right. But mushroom probably, probably number one if they do count. Yeah. Oh, shoot, like a deep-fried mushroom. Mushrooms are so good, yeah.

That's my favorite vegetable. Yeah. Mushrooms are number one. Poled pork mushroom? Dude. How dire is the state of the vegetable world right now that number 30 is seaweed? Dude, we couldn't come up with 30 better vegetables and seaweed?

Seafood? Well, I think seaweed's pretty good. Seafood's good, but it's also just salt. It's just pure. It's just... It's like the, it's like the, it's like the equivalent of cotton candy, but for salt. It's just like nothing. Bro, it's, it's like eating worms.

What? I feel like a damn dirt worm man. What are you're eating about? Number 39 is eggplant. I'm going to take a hard stance. Fuck eggplant. What? Fuck it.

I hate it. I don't really like eggplant either. Y'all are, you all are, have something. I bet, I bet you want the eggplant, right? Yeah. You guys have a disgusting part of your brain. No, you have an Italian part of your brain that makes you like eggplant. You have a nasty lobe that in your brain that makes you like nasty crap and hate good stuff like eggplant.

Eggplant should be number like five. You are fucking stupid. Oh, artichoke's good as hell. Oh, artichoke is. Yeah, dude, I love fucking mayonnaise. He saved our friendship. Yeah. I'm just scrolling through the vegetable list.

Whenever I see a vegetable I like, my eyes are lighting up and I can't process. What else is going on? It's going to say his name out loud. Number 45, bitter gourd. That can't be number 45. Best ever because I like the nutritional value of that vegetable. I don't like... I've never had a bit of board.

Especially I like the nutrition of that. Number 50 is horse or 49 horseradish. That's not a vegetable, is it? Yeah. We can't, we can't gate... That's a sauce. So many on these are not, are not vegetables. Horse radish is a...

What? That's a plant? Bamboo shoots Do I look like damn Jack Black The Kung Fu Pand over here I'm not gonna eat bamboo Tiger nuts

Number 75 Oh etamame dude All right Yeah It should turn you to a girl dude Number 94 One bean Gives you tits

Yeah one bean you're a girl Last The last thing on the list is a yam Which I think has been covered By sweet potato Mung What? Mung beans?

Mung, you like Mung, dude? I've never seen Mung. You've probably had mung beans, like mung bean sprouts. I don't know what Mung is. Mung is a goo-go-gag-troll word. Wait, I just read the comments on Ginger. I only like gingerbread man, please. The nice spice of ginger.

Well, there's one called Salsify. You know, sounds like something Bobby Flay would do. A new startup app I'm working on. Sounds pretty good, actually. Salsify, I'd go there. Yeah. Casava, sea kale, elephant garlic. Oh, what does that look like?

I'm going to Google that right now. Probably purple. Elephant garlic. Why would you guess purple? It's purple. It's purple. What the fuck is purple? Damn.

It's too easy for me, dude. I know my colors. There's only one picture where it's purple. Oh, okay. Oh, so it's just big garlic. It makes sense. Big and purple like an elephant. Elephants are not purple

Yeah they are They're not purple are they then Gray A purpleish gray No Yep Gray is kind of just like purple It's chill purple dude

It gray is like if purple was in like a black and white movie Yeah exactly it's old school Okay I can get behind that Old school purple Yeah the last 10 vegetables I have never heard of The last Well it's probably why they're in the last 10 Samfire, Cat Sears, Orachi.

Freddy Godzilla just sat here and was like, I got to add, I got to add green beetroot, Anona, Lulow. I got to add these just in case someone wants to vote for them. Yeah, what the fuck is this one here? What? Sea Rocket. Sounds pretty cool, actually. Let me see.

Samfire. What the hell is a zucchini? Catseers. Am I right? Yeah, what is this? Sea Rocket is a fucking flower. Yo, wait, let me look this up. These people are sick.

What is this one here? fucking lemon grass This is a flower that grows on the beach This is horrible Yeah I know damn sea turtle You should not eat anything that grows in sand That's like

I agree That's horrible That's like eating a tumbleweed All right Yep We are done with the list We're done with Pat do you have any other part of your body

You want to complain about? No I do Your belly button Why? Because I had it I'm building I'm going to make it a puddle

dude when I come to New York. And it'll just stay like that forever. All right, bye. Bye.