Podcast About List - Ep. 168 - Scintillating Notions

Episode Date: November 3, 2021

The most philosophical episode yet. Subscribe to www.patreon.com/podcastaboutlist

Come in, come in, come in. Let me see your butt. All the bounce to the ball list. Every crap monster. Oh, man. I wish I could get an elephant, man. Disease on my nuts. That exists.

I know, dude. I've seen the guy just to wear... He used to wear the sweatshirt over his pants. Yeah, he wears like a onesie. He wears a hoodie. And he just bounces around on his balls all day. Dude, I wish I could. That's the life.

Yeah. Yeah, I honestly, if I had something like that, maybe I would be completely fine with being just a zoo animal that people just like pay to come. Yeah, because like I get, I get everything taken care of. You know what you could do. And I just fucking chill. Yeah. Because what's harder?

And if you have giant balls that you have to bounce on all day. Or giant everything else. Or giant everything else. Giant everything else, tiniest balls in the world. That's that, no, that's like the most successful man ever. Yeah. But if you have just giant balls, is it hard? to be like go like try to interview to be a bank teller or is it harder to be a zoo animal

it's probably way harder to try to be a normal guy it's probably easy to be a normal guy it's just people will stare at you which what you could do is get like a face tattooed on the giant balls but then but then if you're if people are staring at you i would you'd get mad but you wouldn't get mad if they paid you five dollars to stare at you yeah you know this is i think we're just greenventing the freak teller gets tip that's true have you not been tipping your your bank telling 10% of everything you take

out and put in yeah 18 there's a gratuity there's a gratuity included in your receipt yeah damn I have not I went to the bank today just to put like a cash in my car

in my account yeah and I I have not walked into a bank in a while probably the last time I walked into a bank was to open up my checking account when I was 17. I used to pay my rent here with a cashier's check. Those suck.

Yeah, it sucks. And then I didn't know, I Bank of America, and the lady, it was always the same teller every month. And I guess it takes forever. It takes like, fucking 15 minutes for them to do it. And one time, like, probably the six or seven times I did it, she just was like, you know that you can just pay this online. Because I guess they have some bill pay thing.

Yeah. Or they'll like basically just send an automated cashier. check, so she just got mad at me because I would just waste her time every fucking on the first year's check, like, does, is that the one that costs money to do it? Yeah, costs like $15. It costs like $10. Yeah. Yeah, because that shit's so big. And also if you lose it, that is just gone. It's gone. Yeah. Yeah. You just lose the money. Literally the worst idea at all time. So I was so terrified walking, walking with my entire rent back to my house. When I, when we got accepted for our apartment here, I had to go, I had to get a cashier's check from the bank and

that I had to FedEx it, like, to the, like, to hear from Boston. And so I had to, I had, like, basically, I had, like, an envelope in my hand with, like, thousands of dollars in it. I had to walk, I had to walk from, I had to walk from, like, Alston to, to, um, Brookline to get to the FedEx store. And it was windy as fuck. Like, the wind was, like, blowing. It was, like, blowing. It was terrifying. No, I didn't have anything that I could. Well, also, I feel like it'd be way less secure to put it in like a pocket because it would just like like versus like holding it in my hand. Yeah. Any time I have a cashier's check in my hand, I expect to be like trying to cross the street and then like a black suburban pulls up and a bunch of like Japanese hitmen get out and try to fucking kill me. Well like if I put it in a pocket, it's going to fly out of the pocket. Yeah. Yeah. But then like then because you like the mental thing that happens in your brand, you have to hold on to it.

Exactly. If I let go, it's gone. I did that disappear. I would put it in my jacket. Yeah. I wouldn't. Yeah. Literally I'll only hold it in my hand. Somebody steals the jacket off my back. Yeah. Also, if someone steals the check, somebody bugs you, somebody bugs you. They can't even, they can't even cash it. It's just like, like, if I robbed somebody and just frame it and put it on my wall. Yeah, $10,000, just that nobody can ever use. My first $10,000.

Yeah. My first $10,000 I stole. That's just scary, dude. That's like having the, like, a cash out voucher from a casino. Yeah, exactly. Which is what I do. I have a cash out voucher because I forgot. to cash out on the riverboat.

I have one for Caesars for a single cent. Yeah, I have a few. I have a few. I kind of want to just collect all my penny ones. Yeah, well, that's what you save them. You bring them back. Oh, see, I just say it'd be funny. Like, maybe, maybe have, like, when I'm older,

like a scrapbook on my coffee table that just, like, the cover is, like, maybe a photo of me and Jana at our wedding or something. And then you open it just all just one-cent cash-out vouchers from casinos. Yeah. I feel like that's a good idea. Show to my kids. You can make like a museum, like a gambling, a Caleb's gambling museum. Cover an entire room.

Yeah. Angela Sawyer in Boston, she has a, she had like her living room was just covered in parking tickets. Just do that with. Yeah. With Caesar's vouchers for one single penny. I think I'd do that with dollar bills. But then you can't spill. And I live in a $1 million home.

No. You would live in a $1 home. You'll do it with $1 on the wall, but I had to put it up a million times. No. You would put the same dollar up a million times because you couldn't decide where to put it. Yeah. Yeah, you'd be so indecisive about it. Do you just believe in feng shui?

Yeah. Fung Shui. Fung Shui? Do you believe in feng shui? I don't know. Honestly, I didn't believe in feng shui until that one time you brought it up that we were at Wawa. Wawa is the strongest case for the existence of feng shui I've ever seen. Because it just lacks it.

It's, yeah, well, it's just the worst, yeah, just huge clog of energy completely. It's literally just stressful to be in there at all. Funguay is like white noise. It's like you don't realize it until it's gone. Yeah. And that's exactly how Wawa is. Yeah. I mean, I think, I mean, I don't, I think it is like, if you go into a house that it like has like,

everything is like placed fucked up and there's like no space, like it feels claustrophobic and shitty. Like it feels, yeah, like your apartment, it feels bad to be in there. Like that's, yeah. There's an energy. that affects you. Well, it was way worse when we first moved in. I still, I don't like recording at your house. I feel like I get, I feel like I get distracted.

It's bad feng shui. This apartment is pretty good feng shui, I feel like. Yeah, that's why I'm never home. Yeah. Yeah, I just realized that's probably why I'm never home. It's feng shui. Yeah. Yeah.

Shit. Fang shui is real. Oh, that's going to suck because the winter's coming up. I'm going to be forced into my home. Fang. Damn. What are you saying? Feng Shui.

What the fuck are you? sang you know fung not fuck feng shui feng fengg yeah i know it's spelled fang fang shui no wow wow wow don't like where this is going okay it's kind of going muppets right now that's better that's a better direction that's funny there we go yeah i did find i found a this just reminded me i found a website about feng shui um like a few weeks ago i was reading i was a bunch of articles about different feng shui so let me see if i can find it there's like guidelines of like what kind of welcome mat you can have or not have so it's like welcome mats with like like jokes on them those are really like negative energy yeah it will like it says it'll like it's negative energy or something in like a like a welcome mat there's rules about like the colors and stuff too like there's all these yeah i would agree any any sarcastic uh the sarcastic welcome mat you i don't want to stay at that place you're setting a bad yeah every single day you come home from work and you're

treated with like fucking sarcasm or a fucking tartis on your welcome hat dude fuck that it also depends on the direction of the door that's like how what color the the mat is is like depends on which direction the door I think I'm gonna forget

believing in everything forget cutesy sayings and monogrammed mats no one's home no rug rats allowed and beware the cat are guaranteed to chase away positive chi or at least give it pause placing your name or initials underfoot just means people are stepping on or wiping their dirty shoes on the Smith Jones residence every time they visit. Why would you want that? Holiday mats should be displayed with extreme care.

No kitchy or cluttered designs and removed promptly when the holiday period ends. Faded beachy flip-flops in February or happy holidays with Poinsettas in July signals that you are lazy or just don't care about the all-important portal at the gate of your home. That's not a good message for guests or good fortune. I will say that on my street they put up uh the they already put up the christmas decorations yeah i'm getting bad vibes on the street sucks yeah i'm getting really bad vibes that is a chee that is a chee blocker yeah yeah those are chee those are chee catchers they are catching the chee put up like a turkey you don't have to put up like a christmas tree already bunch of jingle bells and i hate yeah i hate this right yeah christmas on

november first is horrible yeah that's the worst that's been up since since the 15th of october yeah no i saw it i saw it on halloween i was getting mad yeah no it's it's Pretty upsetting. Yeah. Yeah. And if they're going to be there, at least turn them on, they just don't turn them on until December. Yeah. It's like, I'd rather, you know, I'd rather have some, like, colorful, beautiful, most beautiful lights, you know, nice lit-up star of David.

Why not a cornucopia? Mm-hmm. Well, that's the other thing about Thanksgiving is, uh, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a colonizer holiday. So it was Halloween. So you ever think about that? So is Christmas. You ever think about that? Every holiday is.

Easter. Easter's the most colonizer holiday. Eggs fucking colonizer. and the bushes in my back yard. Little kids trying to come through Indigenous People's Day. Yeah.

Yeah. Big time. Big time, dude. Yeah. Do you know why it's on that day? Because of Columbus Day. Because of Columbus. Yeah.

You know what he did. He discovered America. That's right. And they colonized that holiday away from him. Yeah, dude. They stole it from him. That's right. That's a good point.

He discovered that day. That's right. He was living on that day for years, and they found it. They were like, oh, this is our day. And he had a beautiful culture on that day of being off work and having 14 beers. And then all of a sudden, indigenous peoples are taken over Columbus. Making us watch freaking Buzzfeed videos instead. What the hell is that?

That was a holiday where you have to watch Vox.com fucking Carlo tell you that Columbus was actually not a piece. Yeah. Also, I don't really remember, but I think we used to get presents on Columbus. Get presents on Columbus Day. I remember. I think that's true. I think everybody got a check. Everyone would dress up like the boat.

You could pick the Nina, the Pinter, the Santa Maria, and you would go around and you would find candy in bushes. And now you can't even do that because of the council culture. Yeah, it's fucked up. That used to be a day when the Santa, the Easter Bunny, and the tooth fairy all worked together. They made me take down my Columbus Day tree. Yeah?

They did. Wow. Yeah. Were they using the wood to make a tiny boat? They made a kayak, and they rode it in the street. Really? Yeah, and they played hip-hop real loud, too. I hate these kayaks that are always blasting hip-hop so loud.

These canoes. When I'm trying to sleep. These kayaks go by. These iced out canoes. With the thumping subwifers. God. It's fucking annoying, dude. Horrible.

When they have the hydraulics on the back of the canoe. Yeah. Yeah. floating up and down. They're bobbing up and down like they're in the water. It's fucking annoying, dude. You know what the next future in, like, vehicle invention? What? It should be, they should give up on

like self-driving cars and shit. They should have walking boats. Yes. Not wheels on the boat either. Not like a duck boat, but like robotic legs on a boat. You know what we got to bring back? What? Uh, fucking the thing where you got four guys and they put you on their shoulder. Oh yeah,

like a king. That, what happened of that, dude? The chair on the poles? Yeah. Why is it? is the Pope the only guy who gets this now? Why can't I have... He has a big bulletproof car where it looks like a condom. Yeah.

Why can't... Is that what the Pope-Mobile looks like? Okay, how many people probably... So for every 10,000 like Honda Accords, probably four guys die. Yeah, probably.

So why can't we just have those four guys? If you can afford 10,000 Honda Accords, you could just be able to pay to have four guys do that forever from Ford. Right? Yeah. Ford. Yeah.

That should be, okay. That should be those guys' job. That's what we, for life. People don't like the Boston dynamic robots. Yeah, exactly. People don't like the Boston dynamic robots, but we put them, put four of them on a pole. No, no. A huge part of that setup is suffering.

Yeah. Is enslavement. You need to feel, you need to be sitting there and feel how unlevel it is because there's one person who's obviously. You need to be able to, like, kick someone in the back of the head if they're not carrying you. They're carrying you kind of like using the tension of their arm to just carry you with their wrist. You want it on the shoulder. I want to bruise there. I wouldn't go to McDonald's if the food was automated because there's no one to yell at.

Exactly. Also. This food is out here too fast. Put it back. There's too much salt. If McDonald's people, I mean, I hesitate to call them people. If they were as as cheery as Chick-fil-A employees, I would not go there. Yeah, absolutely.

Because Chick-fil-A, yeah, the employees are happy, but the food's good. McDonald's, the food is terrible, but you're fucking... McDonald's is like... On the worst day of their life. That's like the modern... Going to, like, McDonald's is the modern equivalent of, like, going to, like, the gladatorial games. Exactly. You just go to see somebody have literally the worst day of their life and, like, experience, like, suffering.

in excess of what should be possible. And a city McDonald's, but a small town McDonald's, I feel like they're even worse. What are you talking about? It's a way sadder. Yeah, the people working at a small town McDonald's, you think they're happy? You think they want to be there? I saw a video of a small of a McDonald's employees hit a blunt. Dude, the small town McDonald's, the people have to drive 45 minutes to fucking get there.

Yeah, true. Yeah, and they're all owned by a guy who like, owns every McDonald's in town looks as you act like porky pig. It's all, it's a story of God. It's like always a five-foot guy with a big fat face, who's just completely red. Oh, yeah. Completely red, like, he has, like, he's not bald yet. Oh, he's getting there, though.

But he has, like, he's working on it. Like, he's got, like, slicked back, like, the last, like, five hairs he has. And he's filthy, rich. He thinks it's cool to. He has, like, so many. He's got, like, six ATVs. Once a month, he goes into every location. He mistakes five different people.

He calls five. five different people, Jose. There's one guy named Jose. It calls five different people, Jose. Yeah. And the guy named Jose doesn't work there. Yeah. He quit eight years ago.

Yeah. He, but like... He refuses to install any of the new cool McDonald's shit, like the panels. They still have the, uh, they still have the fucking greenhouse glass on it. Yeah. And when he goes in, he likes to, like, give, like, the assistant manager or, like, the manager just, like, shitty business quips. Yeah.

Yeah. He tells jokes. jokes and then advice that he has He tells jokes about... Well, I've been running this McDonald's for, I don't know, 10 years now and what I learned is that I mean, you gotta treat the customer you got to greet every customer with a smile.

That's right. And then he turns to the other employee and he tells one joke about each woman in the restaurant. He also... He thinks he's like a powerful smart business magnet because he like opened the most popular

restaurant in the fucking world and he's like yeah i did pretty well for myself it's pretty smart to me i opened a restaurant that is like fucking selling water bottles in the sahara yeah exactly yeah he's he walks it he also he walks into the restaurant like a like a one shot like one take shot at the beginning of a movie where like a guy's like walking through and like talking to everybody and like oh dude he loves opening that counter flat yeah that counter door yeah exactly yeah like a camera's following to people yeah it's like he's about to go It's like the beginning of a Louis special. He's like a short sleeve button down.

You can see like a pit stain starting to form. Yeah, you just see, you see his tires, his tires of his Subaru, like just pull into the parking lot that you see like his cowboy booze as he walks out. You pan up, the legs are way shorter than you thought they were going to be. And pants up past his head and then correct. And then you just see him walk in. And then, yeah, he's talking shit to everybody. He walks in. he asked for a thing that's not on the menu that he named after himself,

and then they put, like, a urinal cake on a bond. Just give him the most disgusting thing of all time. Something that does not pass any sort of health code. He literally wants a burger with ice cream on it. A filet of fish with Big Mac sauce. Yeah, yeah. Something fucked up like that. Yeah, and then he reprimand somebody else behind him in line tries to order the same thing,

and he bans them from the restaurant for life. Yeah, he's like, that's what. my thing. They don't call it your fucking name. They call it the Brown. Hey, Fatso. Get out of here. He's way fat. He's way fatter. Yeah. Oh, just him trying to, like, have the employee like, take a bite.

Yeah. It's just like, come on, try it. It's good. They should be, they should put this on the menu. Yeah, I've been in talks to put this on the menu. I've been talking, I've been talking to regional headquarters. I've been talking to put, uh, I know, something on the menu that's just, Roy Kroc heard of him. Yep, I've been talking to him from the movie. It's just, it's just, it's just,

one of the, uh, it's, it's just a soda cup filled with fries. Yeah. And he's like, I've been thinking this would be great on him. Yeah. He stole, he just stole the idea from five guys. Right. He went to the five guys next door. And he came in with a, or the cup of fries that make this. I don't know what this is, but it's so good. See, I think the burgers at five guys are pretty good, but, uh, can't beat, you can't beat a free burger for my own free. I know all this McDonald's needs is one guy, me. I know that guy in my hometown. Yeah. Yeah. The, the, the, the McDonald's man in my Mr. McDonald's? He went to my mom's church, yeah.

What was his name? His name was Tim. Okay. Yeah. He was exactly how I just, I mean, he's just completely porky the pig. Yeah. I mean, he like, he like waddles. He's one of those dudes who wears jeans that go up to his nipples.

Oh, hell yeah. He's got a power. Little white button down. And this guy fucking, this guy would do anything for Jesus Christ. Oh, yeah. Dude, he would fucking, he'd do anything except fucking sell McDonald's or pay taxes. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Yeah. oh man the day that the day that he comes in and works a shift for like 20 minutes oh yeah and he thinks yeah oh dude that's always the you know what you know that like stench that you start smelling in a restaurant when the owner walks in plain clothes and just starts like asking people how their food is yeah and then and then do make it you know what the best though is if if they're like hey he's like everything going good and you know this guy's like a millionaire and you're like yeah could i get a could i get a sprite please and then that guy has to go get you a sprite. That's so sick.

Yeah. That's the best feeling ever, dude. Yeah. Well, I mean, when they walk up and ask you everything, just be like, who are you? Yeah. What are you doing? Why don't you have, you're getting fired. You're not dressed like everyone else. You're not a waiter. Yeah. Why don't you have your skimpy little hooters shorts on? We're busy over here.

Yeah. Yeah. That was like when I worked at Cracker Barrel and like the corporate guys had to come in because they were like, there's like a shit ton of fights that kept happening between the kitchen. and uh one of one of the guys like checked my bag to see if i was stealing food like like like this he thought he's gonna fucking open up so you see pork and beans yeah the brim so i don't i i ordered food before i my shift ended and the guy was like uh yeah you know just company policy i got to check that real quick and i was like man what what yeah that's crazy slick like sebastian man o'scalco like next time that happens to me and one of the managers

come up and they're in plain clothes i'm gonna pretend i don't know they work there and I'm going to be like, you should get on on this. We're planning on bombing this restaurant. We're planning on just fucking dropping a stick of dynamite in the kitchen running. Would that be cool? You should get in on this. Yeah, we're going to put ice in all the deep friars. Yeah.

Or also, like, a guy comes up and he's like, he's like, I like, can I get you anything? And you just, since he's not dressed, do you think he's, like, messing around. You're like, oh, yeah, yeah, I also work here. Can I get you anything? I don't know. Start get up, you walked to every table. Can I get you something? Look, I'm that guy.

Oh, I think I work here. Me and him, we're pretending to work here today. It's going to be really funny. Yeah. Yeah, dude. The guy who owned the Jersey Mikes that I used to work at, he was like the hardest worker ever, though. Yeah.

Yeah, he was like, it was clear that he opened the store with his wife, and then his wife left him, so all he had was at a restaurant, and he was, like, trying to pay fucking, like, alimony and shit. And he was just struck. He probably worked like 60 hours a week. My best, my go-to is the number seven. That one I can make an under six seconds flat. Just like shit like that.

He taught me how to fucking roll up the sandwiches, bro. Yeah. Whoa. To skill I will have for the rest of my life. Oh, yeah, dude, me too. I know how to fold the, uh... It's the same thing's a burrito. I know how to fold the paper for the pizzas at Clover Food Lab.

I can still do that in my sleep. Yeah, you can't do that in your sleep. I can do that in my sleep. You can't do anything. dude i can get i can get that sandwich out in six seconds flat you can't not in your sleep in your sleep i can do it in my sleep no you can't yeah i could do it in my sleep oh another thing about that cracker barrel guys he used to call me chief that pissed me off so much i don't know why just like him just being like chief oh what's up chief like have i told you guys about that my my friend's dad who

hates being called chief no oh yeah i know maybe i don't think i said it on the podcast but i have a friend who uh his dad is like Puerto rican and uh When he was, like, at work, some guy started calling him chief because he, like, just as a thing that he said. Yeah. But this guy's dad took it as this guy thought that he was Native American. And it pissed him off so much that he, like, tried to, like, fight the guy at work about it. Yeah. And then, and so everyone knew that this guy hated being called chief.

And then my older brother one time, when they were, like, 16, he, like, brought some other 16-year-old over to this guy's house. and before he met the guy's dad, he was like, just so you know, this guy, he doesn't like being called by his name, he only likes being called Chief. And so the guy walks out to, like, meet them in the driveway, and my brother's friend is like, hey, nice to meet you, Chief. And then this grown man just punched this 16-year-old in the face.

He got so mad about it. It's so cool. Yeah, and he's just like, I'm not Native American. Getting so offended of, like, by getting called Native American that you punch somebody you punch a child

it's insane you have another really good like before you meet somebody prank is my dad my uncle like did this to my dad before it's like he was like bringing his friends over

to like hang out with my dad but like I guess before the hang on he like told all the people like just so you know like he's like super hard of hearing and he's like really insecure about it so just like talk really loud

And, like, but don't bring it up. Like, don't. So they just go over and be like, hi there! Like, how are you? That's so funny, dude. Like, what the fuck is going on? That's so fucking funny.

It's so good. Yeah. Yeah. That type of shit's so funny. It's so funny. It's the best, it's the best, like, the, just making somebody feel like they're in a dream. Yeah.

Like, you're going crazy. Yeah. Yeah. So fucking funny. Yeah. It is good. I got, like, a hair in my eye. Oh.

That's called. an eyelash. No. Should we do this list? You know, I don't got those? You ever thought about cutting your eyelashes off? Speaking of thinking, this is a thinking man's episode, which I'm sure you could

tell already. I mean, we've already tacked a lot of serious subjects. Some heady concepts. Yeah. We already basically just like those thinkers. This is Thinkers of stinkers.

Top 10 mind-blowing philosophical ideas to think about. And it says, philisophy has always been a weird subject to wrap your head around. And this list contains some of the most mind-blowing philosophical concepts and ideas for a person to think and wonder about. I think this might cause, this could cause a crisis in my life if somebody has blow my mind too hard. This could cause the listeners to have a brain blast. I'm smart enough that I could handle this, but I think some listeners may want to turn this off. If you have somebody who's very mentally weak in the car with you, maybe a child.

You should probably turn this off. Yeah, or put the child out of the car. Or put the child out of its misery. Just put it out of the... Just snuff it. Put the child. Just put it out like a candle. Yeah, just snip that...

The thread of fate. Sever. It... Number one... Sever the child. Sever the child's... The sorrites... Sorites.

So I looked this up. Paradox. So this is pretty genius. I looked... I looked this up. This is... Uh, uh, wait, no, this person just explains it. That's fine. Yeah. Would you allow someone to cut off one of your fingers if they paid you one cent? Well, boys, answer that, please. Yes. Yes. Did we go, wait, do I get to choose the finger? Yes. You also get to choose what kind of penny it is. You could choose like a million dollar penny. Yeah, exactly. I feel like, I feel like a missing pinky is a cool enough look that I'd do it for a cent. I could make that work. If I, I, I would lose my left hand pinky. If it was painless, I would, I would, you know, I would.

Probably just do it. Yeah. Like, I've never used this finger. Yeah. And that would just be cool. It would be cool. It would be interesting.

It's a conversation starter. And they'd be like, oh, how'd you lose that? It'd be like, for a penny. Honestly, I could probably get like a 15-minute comedy central special if I lost this. Probably, yeah. The comedian with no pinky. Yeah, with just with who only has. Everyone, yeah.

So you're probably wondering how this happened. Well, basically, I made a deal with a guy on a website and I got one cent for it. So, hmm. Nobody remembers your name. You're just, you're the one pinky guy. Pinky the comedian. You know, that one guy with one pinky, that one comedian, yeah. Probably not.

Okay, a restart. Would you allow someone to cut off your fingers if they paid you for one cent? Probably not. How about $4 billion? I know I would, and I'm confident that you probably would too. This establishes two things, that there are sums of money that you will accept to cut off your finger, and there are sums of money that you will decline to cut off your finger because of how money works. The difference between the highest figure you'll say no to,

and the lowest figure you'd say yes to is exactly one cent. These numbers objectively exist, but they're impossible to grasp. Pick the lowest number you can think of accepting and tell me honestly that you'd decline a counteroffer of exactly one cent less. So that is not an explanation of this at all. So from what I understand about the So-Rites paradox, the So-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-Tees paradox, is that this whole thing is just,

would you suck a dick for $1 million? Yeah. That's the paradox. They had to reframe it for books. Yeah. Because that's been around since caveman time. I know. How many rocks would you suck a dick for?

It's been around since before money. Yeah. Would you suck a dick for 10 rocks? Yeah. Well, they were like, would you suck a dick for a million dollars? And they were like, I don't know what dollars is, but yes. Yeah, we haven't invented dollars. Well, they started with that question.

And then they were like, I guess we finally should invent dollars. Yeah. Yeah. It's high time we put something. Yeah. We've had shekels. rupees we need to but let's just finally let's get dollars out of the way and that's why they started america yeah yeah so that someone could get their dick sucked for one million dollars

someone had been asking for quite a long time yeah nobody'd ever gotten their dick suck the first millionaire only existed because he wanted to get sucked so bad which one is higher your suck a dick number or you lose a pinky number um they're exactly the same yeah they're both pure pain i think the pinky ones probably higher because like maybe i would miss it you Yeah, Pinky, that's a more permanent effect on your life. Also, the suck-a-dick question is always, I've always been confused about what kind of time frame we're working with here. Do I have to suck a dick forever?

I've never thought about that. If the guy... If it's forever, I'm not going to do it. But that would be the genie, the genie twist, right? Yeah, because it works like the lottery where it's like, oh, like, you can get the $1 million in one lump sum or over the course of your life. A dollar a day. Yeah.

Yeah, I wonder, like... You have to suck a dick every day. But, like, if the guy has, like, what if I... What if they're like, okay, suck that guy's dick to completion? And it's, like, somebody who, like, has no feeling below their waist. And I'm just, like, sucking a limp dick forever for a million dollars. That's not good to me. I guess if it's a genie asking the question, should...

Okay, so... Genies are tricky. I'll say, genies are tricky, people. Here's the... Here's the... Here's another question. So if it is the lottery thing, would you suck one dick a year for like $33,000 a year? Probably.

Until you get the million? If it was like 10 minutes, like, yeah, I don't care. Yeah. You know? Yeah. Well, 33,000. That's maybe not enough. Well, I mean 3,300.

Oh, no. No. If it was like... 3,300,000. If it was a... $33,000 isn't enough? I have discount. Calculia. I can't go past 33,000. It would just be, because that's not enough to just, like,

live on comfortably. It would just... So you want to suck a dick and also that you want that to be your job is what you're saying. I think I want to be a process. Yeah, I didn't do that. Yeah. If I like a supplemental thing, like you want that to be how you support yourself. If I had one, if I had to, yeah, because I like doing nothing. So I had, if I had one, like, fucking John that I sucked off, like, Once a year Yeah And he And he was like

Rich Saudi Prince or something Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah 100% Like 60 grand

I would do that too Yeah Like public school teacher salary For like fucking sucking a guy off One day I'll even do

I'll do all day Like I'll have a 365 day year You know what I mean Like And then just one day It's just a wash Just because I

I just fucking Sucked a man's Yeah but then Think about like dude would you know what day is dick suck day that would be the big thing to me that's what 33 wouldn't work i think it would just sprung up on you at random i wouldn't drop everything going on like if i if i was like like what if i'm like about to walk down the aisle on my wedding day yeah and then i get

the big red phone on my desk rings that well that's if you don't have a job if that's your job you got to do it i guess it plays that i got five on it remix from us You're waiting You're walking down And then your phone just goes Dun dun dun dun You're just like Oh shit

I have to suck a dick today I think the The big thing would be for 30 If it was 33,000 And I had to do it once Every year I would be worried That I would have some kind of

Like what if I got really successful And then I'm making like 800 grand a year But then still one day of year I have to go suck a guy's dick For 30K You have to I think it's a

It's a binding contract. Yeah. I think... Binding contract, like, like $25,000 for over four years. Yeah, yeah. I think, yeah, if there was a guy... Four, I could, I would totally... If there was a guy who did that...

Suck off a guy for $25,000. Let's call him Patches. If there's a guy in patches who's hiring me to do that once a year, like, he probably would... He'd probably sue me for everything I have if I didn't suck his dick. Yeah. You know, because we had a binding thing. thing. That's, okay, that's why the pinky thing is better, because it's one and done.

Yeah. You know, you lose one pinky, they're not going to reattach it and take it back off. Yeah. Would you, would you, so you'd rather, would you rather, you'd rather, you'd rather, you'd rather suck a dick four times, four times, over four years, than one time for 100,000? What? I did the math wrong. I thought that added up to one million.

It would be $250,000, four times, that's up to a million. I can't, dude, you know, I can't take numbers. you'd rather get $100,000 than a million Yeah, I'd probably I'm lower at the price $25 $4 times

That's a million I would do it for $25 over the course of one weekend This is the number two mind-blowing philosophical thought Linguistically it's possible for two people to have a conversation each believes to be meaningful, but actually has no meaning, because one or both of them don't know what they're talking about.

This happens to me all the time. This, yeah, I feel like that's, that's, you probably, you probably experience this a lot. I experience this every day of my life. Would you consider it to be philosophical when it happens? Indubidably, I do. Minds blowing, in fact. I concur that, um, this. Yeah, continue.

Keep going. I can't keep going. I cannot say that. I cannot keep. I cannot continue this line. keep speaking that way in that regard he said something

what did you say last night rather oh yeah oh yeah he said all I said was rather I had never heard you say rather before you said something

and then corrected yourself by being like rather and then the correct thing and I was like it really it was like a sore thumb dude

it's really stuck out I do that like all the time you're changing dude you're going Hollywood on me yeah you started to say

rather the fuck man what I think you guys made fun me so hard once because I think I was asking if we would bring the mics to North Carolina or something or like what did you say oh I forget what I said he said something crazy I said oh yeah like like ultimately like it doesn't ultimately it doesn't matter ultimately it does not

matter to me yeah and then I did not know I was getting flamed for that for saying ultimately yeah because I would say there's probably not a higher stake word to set up a sentence with, then ultimately. Because that, that kind of establishes that it's the most important thing. And then for you to follow it up by like, it doesn't matter. Even better. I, I searched it in my eye message. It wasn't, ultimately, it doesn't matter.

It was a home turf episode would be good, but ultimately pointless. Ultimately pointless. Wow. Ultimately pointless. That was a Boston thing. Ultimately, ultimately ethereal. I would find this We got him all right

Yeah that I don't talk like that Were we tearing him up I said I said You said but ultimately pointless Mm yes I said Studying for the SATs You said fruitless and futile

Our attempts to record would be I said I find it would be rather inane In nature to convey our equipment yonder And then Patrick said I'm downstairs You know, you know, I was just fuming on the shirt. Just like, no, fuck.

Like, why the fuck did I say that? I thought that made so much. I thought, oh, fuck, I thought that made sense. Number three, most philosophical concept ever is, no matter what you do, you will be plagued by regret. For example, if you marry, you will regret. it but if you don't you will regret that too damn this person sounds sad yeah this idea also gives you the advice live for what you have not for what you could have had yeah live for your die here's here's a comment from roco i could express my thoughts but if i do everyone will think that

i'm one of those people who rambles on if i don't people will think i'm one of those people who looks through lists and never vote on anything if i write this people will see it on my profile and think i'm weird if i don't include this in my wording people might have no idea what I'm talking about, just like the first item on this list, which is about people not understanding what you're saying. Never mind. I'm definitely one of those people who rambles. Damn, Morocco. I think Rocco took too many Benadryl. Yeah. Not doing very well. Rocco got a visit from the Shadow Man. Dude, I've been reading all about that shit's so funny. I knew some people in high school

who did Benadryl and like fucking like DXM and shit. But I didn't realize how crazy it is. Oh, yeah. It's so funny, dude. Yeah. it's like you just it's like an objectively terrible drug that people just do because it's like like kids just do it because it's like in their house yeah because it's easy you can't get weed yet you don't know I was thinking about like we used to like the big thing in my like group uh grown up was like two five I like in bone shit you know like the research chemicals that are like insanely strong just make you crazy yeah and I was like I guess that's kind of the same thing that and like K2 yeah I didn't I I never did Ben a drill and shit that's You know, yeah. Or like nutmeg. Yeah, I was always saying nutmeg is the funniest one. I tried to smoke nutmeg.

You don't smoke, you boil it. You boil it? You boil it and drink the water. I heard from Mancers that you smoke it. Mancers was trying to, they threw you off the sun. I remember reading trip reports for Nutmeg, and it's like, they're all like, they're all like, I had a nightmare in real life. And then there was one that was like, I went blind for two hours and fell down in the shower. Dude.

One of the Ben, what did it? deep dive on it yesterday. One of the Benadryl ones I saw, a guy took 4,000 milligrams of Benadryl, and then he, like, immediately, like, lost consciousness and then woke up and looked, he, like, looked down at the couch and saw his body, and then he walked outside, and his entire family was, uh, uh, be, was being crucified on his front lawn, like, on crosses, and they were like, why'd you do this to us? And then he walked inside and he had to fight his dog. And then, uh, uh, It's so funny that just, like, that that Benadryl. Yeah.

Oh, and then he went into a white void of, like, that, that episode of SpongeBob where he, like, time travels. And he says that he was there for seven years. And that he, like, it, like, replaced seven years of his real memory. And then he just woke up in the hospital. And he was like, don't do this drug. Like, I, I, I, they said that I have, like, mentally disabled now. And also, I have to do dialysis every week.

God damn, dude. That's so sick. And people still do it. That's so funny, dude. I mean, it's just like, you're just trying to kill yourself, I guess. Right. Yeah. It's just a horrible way to die.

That's awesome. When I smoke nutmeg, I put it in a post-it note. You just, that's just like a, that's like a, that's like a, that's like making a potion in your backyard. Did it do anything to you? That's happened to me multiple times when I was like, in the eighth grade, I think I like, dissected a cigarette butt that, like, it was in an ashtray and put in a post-it note and tried to smoke it. And I did that with T, too, but every time I, like, I was, like, you know, trying to, like, roll it up in the post-it note because the sticky, like, the adhesive thing. And, like, I would, like, try to, like, smoke it and then, like, tilt my head back, like, just a little bit and just, like, inhale everything that was in the post-it note.

Did he, did you get high? No. Didn't work. You got to do it. You have to do a lot of nutmeg. One time when I was in the fourth grade, just remember this, got in a lot of trouble for this. Because I heard the term smoking grass. So I went outside and I got a bunch of grass from the ground.

And I put it in a piece of paper. I tried to play it. You were doing this as a fucking nine-year-old? That's like honestly really impressive that you're not a drug addict. I was doing it when I was a nine. and then and then I think like

that's some like million little piece of shit yeah yeah in the closet in the closet just blades of grass

and blades of grass in a piece of notebook paper I think I think I hit it I think my brother and I shared a closet at the time because we like

shared a room he's just like who did this you got how do you even get in trouble for that I was trying to like plant it on my brain did you get in trouble

for I think my mom was just like I mean like how do you get so fucking stupid I didn't get mad at a kid to that my mom was pissed

because like I was burning shit yeah I was burning grass and paper where she was like Just kindly. Just like the look on her face of just disappointment that I was like trying to smoke.

That's like worse than our, than my kid. Because like if you, if your kid is nine years old and you find like a joint in his house in his room. That's an actual problem. Well, it's a problem. But also you're like, he's kind of like competent. If he can like do, if you can get that. Yeah. Buy weed and fucking roll a joint.

Not a piece of notebook paper with a grass. How did I get into college? I don't know. I don't fucking know, dude. I don't know how you're alive, honestly. Yeah. You know, it's the blue lines to get you high on the notebook paper. You can feel it because as you smoke it, it'll be period where you're not high,

and then it gets to the blue line and you go, whoa. That ink. What? Really? I was watching the Woodstock movie. And that's what inspired me to do it. That is, like, honestly, one of the stupidest things I've ever heard in my life. That is so funny.

I was a fucked up kid. Fuck, but not like a cool, jaded. No, you're just like, like, you were like, I was just impressionable. You were like a dog's intelligence. That's insane, dude. That's crazy. I can't, I can't believe I'm. fucking, I just remember that.

Damn. Fuck, man. Dude, that was... I mean, my older brother almost getting in trouble for it. Maybe having to be like, it was me. I'm sorry. I admit. The wave of disappointment that watched over my mom's face.

That's so funny. Number four is the idea of moral luck and how it affects the goodness of people. What? Getting banned from listening to the who as a nine-year-old. You might not be wearing tie-dye in the house. because you fucking put grass you made a taco out of grass and notebook paper

it definitely wasn't rolled well it was like it was like twisted at the end like yeah I mean dude the fucking just imagining what it looked like

to my parents like them finding it and being like is that a joint and then like inspecting further and just being like what the fuck

yeah it's not not a joint it's just nothing yeah like might as well not even I mean He's just, like, pocket learned, basically. Yeah.

It's so funny. I don't really know what this means. I don't care. Number five, this one's smart. Number five, the notion of solipsism. The very notion of solipsism. I feel myself becoming a bit intrigued by this item upon this list. Solipsism is a sequence.

Solipsism is just, it's all in your brain. Solipsism is, yeah, you're the only person that exists. Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's true. Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's true, too. I think it's me, though. Yeah, I think it's also you. What? Wait, Pat.

I mean, I messed up. It's me. Yeah, it's me. I have internal thoughts. Who's the only real person? Me or you? Probably me. What?

No, it's me. He didn't hesitate either. I don't say that. You guys are giving me bad vibes. I feel like it's, now I didn't actually think that. Now I kind of feel like it's true. Yeah, it's true. Not true.

That's true for me. You are covering your tracks. I don't like that at all. This could, Ro, here's Rocco again. This could be true, in your case anyway. I mean, I'm not real. I'm a bloody cartoon. Bloody cartoon.

I hope he's not bloody. Yeah, that's a skit. Yeah, what the hell? What the hell? What's that hell? What are we talking about happy tree friends? Yeah, what is this? The Simpsons Treehouse of Blood?

Yeah, what's this? The South Park Kenny special, spectacular? When Kenny gets blood all over? Yeah. Because something happened to him? Here's the thing. A lot of people make, they make, they make two-hour fucking video. videos on YouTube about how Marge is mistreated and about how she should be, you know, she has

some respect for us. There's like some guy who made like a 45 minute, like an hour 45 minute video of him like revisiting Icarly. Yeah. And they talk about how all these women in cartoons and shit are not, I'm not, always when the TV aren't treated well. How about Kenny? That's right.

Kenny gets fucking killed by a, by a spike every episode. He should get his own show where he gets to live and thrive. Yeah, he should get a show, there should be, he should never die again. Yeah. He should get, like, his own, his own, like, uh, his like a Seera. Yeah. So, yeah. I would jump in front of a bullet for Kenny.

I wouldn't. Why? Do you know, do you know, there's, like, South Park, uh, like, role players? Really? Oh, yeah, yeah, those are great. Yeah. Like, like, like, LARP? They'll be, yeah, no, like, on, like, uh, Twitter and stuff.

And they'll be like, they'll be like, hi, my name is Michael Cartman. I just moved to, to the town. really excited to make new friends i'm erics i'm erics uh younger cousin yeah what really like that like inventing new characters yeah making like uh like what's like o c's yeah yeah south park oc's and what's o'c original character so people make like their own like sonic character and stuff oh it's like oh i know the sonic thing but for south park yeah they do that for south park like people do it for everything it makes more sense if it's a video game but like for south park no south they do it for south park because there's like fucking 500 like south park yourself

fucking flash games. It's easy. Sonic, you've got to hand-draw that shit. I texted my mom asking her if she remembers finding the grass joint in my closet and she didn't remember that I was that young. She says you were that young, I hope I beat your ass.

Nice. It should probably happened. I don't know. I'm sure she did, dude. He's looking for excuses. What's this? A blade of grass? Just being the shit of your kid they just fucking had a piece of grass in their house. You probably thought this was drugs. You're so stupid.

Bam, bam, bam, bam. Dude, fucking sick. Number six is possibly the most intriguing yet fascinating entry. Okay. Number six is you can have a doppelganger millions or even billions of light years away. Whoa. I don't think so. I have a few doppelgangers.

You have many. I would say most people kind of look like you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I think Streeter said it, but every country has a Patrick. Yeah, that's true. Because there was that, um, there was that, did you guys see that video, like the, like, there was like a really fat cop on TikTok?

No. In like the Ukraine. They look like you? He looks like me. Really? Yeah. You just have a very, you just look very plain and kind of nothing. Yeah, it's kind of just like a blur.

Yeah. Just, yeah. If you see, you know, like, you know Slender Man? Yeah. Yeah. Not slender man. You just, yeah, you just have like kind of no facial features that stand out at all. Like a Lego, the back of a Lego guy's head.

Yes. Exactly. Just like the question. You look like you're going to, it looks like you're going to turn around and there will be an actual guy on that side. Yeah. You kind of just, you look like a Halloween mask. Like, anybody could purchase it and put it on their face. You know.

The worst comparison, Right now, you kind of look like a pumpkin with your hat and your, and your, you're, that thing. I've always wanted to look like a pumpkin. Really? Yeah, I can tell. Yeah. Well, if I looked like a pumpkin, my hat would be green and my face would be orange. That's a good point.

You clearly have a pumpkin. Like freaking Donald Trump. He loves his green hats. Quick pause. All his supporters are wearing green hats all the time with the words on it. Quick pause, Cameron? Yeah, and fire trucks, they're green too. I will say.

Damn, you're on fire today. Yeah. You're crushing. I will say, remember the MAGA jacket lantern hat? Dude, honestly, dude, every, every single piece of, let's admit it, dude, every single, if Virgil Ablo came out with the MAGA shit, that would have been on, everybody would have been on it. Oh, yeah.

That shit, it just like fucking, just serif text on a, like, it's a cool hat. It's cool as fucked. Yeah. Yeah, I think it's been, it's been four years now. I think we can say it. I think we can say it with it. I'm fucking, I'm wearing it right now. I did, dude, I wanted to get.

I'm growing my hair out. Did I show you guys this? Oh, I saw it the other day. I think I'm just going to, I think I'm going for it. Dude, I see, can I see the top of your head? Yeah, let me look at that. I'm a full halal car. You got to go for it.

Oh, man. Dude. Yeah. You're growing it back out? Not really, because I think I can't stand to do it much longer. No, please stick with it. Dude, you should at least get to Q-tip level, Q-tip-level bald head.

Oh, really? You think I should do that? Like, like, whenever I would shave my head and I would just have, like, completely, like, rounded hair? I don't remember that. You don't remember that? I shaved my head, like, a year ago. No, I'm going to get...

I kind of want to grow out and go, like, uh, like, Walton Guggins. Oh, yeah, you should just shave the, the part up front. Uh-huh. So that I have a nice, like, really far back hairline. Yeah, yeah. That would be sick. Oh, you get, like, the chairman Mao? That's the problem is that I still have hair at the front, so it's bad.

I want to have just a hair, like, no hair until halfway down. It's probably a good idea. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe go full fryer tuck on them? Oh, dude. I don't know if they could handle it, dude. Yes, sir.

I think I might make too many women fucking cream and squirt walking down the street. Could be. Well, that's the thing. Like, maybe people, like, I don't know, maybe people are just so used to the bald now. You know? Maybe they are. I'm used to the bald. Yeah.

I look in them, I don't even... I think you grow your hair out. I shave my head. No. Maybe that's the... No, because then I'm trapped. With the worst hair that ever. Well, then I'll just regrow my hair.

be a big deal. Don't shave your head. I'm like, I might shave my head, too. We could just, I mean, that was actually, that's better than just two of us having it. It would be pretty funny. All three of us had shaved heads. I'm not going to do that. But only one of us is bald. That'd be cool. Number seven is the problem of induction.

I don't know what that means. I mean, well, that makes sense that you wouldn't understand this one. I actually understand that's right. Me and Pat understand it perfectly. No, you know, it's that this guy is such a mental moron that he phrased it so simply, with such simplicity, rather, I should say, instead of that. The words of a dim wit seem to ring true to many. I concur.

He concurred. I... And you can turd. You can turd. Number eight is slugs are just snails without homes. Damn. Throw this on a snort tea. It's a bit of a drop.

Right quick. Yeah, that... Talk about a fucking, a bad welcome mat, Chi style. True. Yeah. How do I get some more Chi also? Like, what... Chee.

You have to figure out what direction. I mean, you just go to the deli, ask the guy for half a pound. You can meditate, I think. Honestly, I didn't believe in chi or energy and spaces until we started going to casinos. Yeah. And then I feel like,

that shit makes you believe in astrology. I literally, dude, I literally could like, if I follow the system of just believing in, in myself and my instinct, I hate the real time. Yeah, people, yeah. People try and discredit it and make it seem stupid with stuff like aura photography, that's stupid.

No, I like aura photography. It's dumb. That shit's dumb. But energy, you can't tell me you never, like, walked into a place and, like, felt energy before. It doesn't matter if it's like, oh, it's actually just your, it's actually because you don't like the store. It's like, well, duh, I don't like it because it has bad energy. One time I was in Provincetown, I walked into a...

Don't say there was bad energy in Provincetown. You are a weird energy from some women. No, no, no. I went into a place that was selling, like, gems. and like stones like a place like a place where people go to buy vibes yeah and they had a big almond brothers tapestry and i was like what the fuck bad why do they have an almond brothers dad that's bad she yeah like like grateful that one you know i mean it's it's a staple it makes sense but like the almond brothers like peach thing i was like man what the like it's it says

almond brothers too and then like the lady behind the counter went like i'm sorry i just have to go outside real quick and to her co-worker and she was like oh why what's what's going on she's like, I don't know, just some people in the store have negative energies and, like, stood outside and, like, meditated, like, in the front of the store. Because of you? Dude, you, like, attacked her physically. Dude, I'm a negative force in this world. I deplete energy. I take energy away. You're a vampire on women. No. You suck their energy out. Yeah. I'm not a vampire on women. You just prove it. I'm a vampire on everybody, dude. Oh, I don't say that. Just women. Come on.

No, I'm a vampire. Why would you rather say everybody instead of just half the people? Because I'm depleting energy. What? I go in, I destroy vibes. You're a vibe destroyer? I'm a vibe destroyer.

You're a vibe canon? Mm-hmm. You're an energy predator. I don't believe in energy except... An energetic predator, right? Yeah. That's what you call someone like in now. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

What? You call me the predator. Not a negative predator. Negative Predator sounds like an insanely good hardcore band Yeah, that sounds sick Yeah, that sounds pretty good I don't believe in energy Also, they be called for casinos

Because they were a hardcore band Yeah, true, yeah Number nine, what I may be, this one will blow your mind What I may be seeing is green Maybe seen by someone else as red It's just that we both have been taught Since childhood to call that particular color green True

That's true I one time my brother said that to me when I was a kid and then I was like, what are you talking about? And he just said, butterfly effect. So then I watched that movie. I watched that movie, and I thought that that was going to be like a part of the movie. It's not. It's not.

It's not. I saw that movie so many times when I was a kid. That's a mind crusher, dude. Yeah, dude. When you're a kid, dude, that's like the first. Like, when you stay home from school, they play that on FX. Because you're not smart enough to see what's like philosophical. about the Matrix, but there's something that is just so in your face, like, annoying about it.

When you're a kid, it's all you understand. Yeah. So, dude, the butterfly effect blew my goddamn mind when I was nine. Hey, it blew that pregnant lady's mind when she opened up that mailbox. Remember that? Yep. She exploded. And then the dog in the bag, dude.

Dude, D and the B. Yeah. Dude. I never saw it. I've seen the butterfly effect probably a hundred times. What? What? I think it's probably...

A hundred times? Probably 50 times. Ballpark. I think that sounds. 50 times. 50 times. At 2 hours each. You spent 100 hours of your life watching... Well, that made for TV movie.

Oh, okay. So, it made the editing for TV version of the butterfly effect. You saw Coucher tear it up. Yes. 90 minutes for 50 times. That went in 2007, 2008. It was a big TV. That was on FX all the fucking time.

Yeah. Yeah. Pretty sad. Mm-hmm. Like the swears? Yeah. I love the swears. Yeah. That shit's so cool.

That scene where he wakes. up and he's going like oh oh oh yeah that yeah uh-huh the dog is in the bag and the dad's a pedophile and then don't spoil everything about it i mean but what happened in the movie i get that is your life uh number 10 the theory of six degrees of separation that is fascinating i hope kevin bacon doesn't i get fascinated when i think of something like that yeah yeah who could who let's who do we have let's name someone elvis elvis so my i know Elvis My uncle was Elvis. One degree.

Somebody else. Somebody else. Yeah. Okay. Who else? Patrick's dad. Kevin? That's one degree, I guess.

So I know Patrick. Yeah. Patrick. Two degrees for us. No, I've met him. Yeah, I know Patrick's dad. One degree.

He has met him. Well, I mean, the obvious one is Kevin Bacon. I know him. He's right. He's over there. One degree. It's like 30 feet. I can map this one.

I can actually map this one. My mom watching. is a city on the hill one degree let's just try Hitler one degree you know what well well maybe for you it's seven for me it's outside I barely lost but I did lose yeah and I'm pretty proud of that

25 degrees from Hitler 25 degrees from Hitler I hope he's burning at 900 degrees I have 360 degrees from Hitler yeah I got to turn around and walk away from him you're facing him directly no 60 degrees same direction he started from. No. Yeah. I don't think so.

Yeah. No, because you spun around so you could see your whole body. I'm 180 degrees from Hitler. Turn around and walk the other way. I don't want to be anywhere near that guy. You walk all the way around the earth 360 degrees. You come up behind him and you hug him.

And you say, guess who? I put my hands on his eyes like this. Yes, who? Yeah. You turn, yes he ween. You turn 360 degrees and then you put your arm at 45 degrees. No. No.

Yeah. Down to point at his badass shoes. Say, what are those? Yeah, and I say, what are those? I say, damn, Hitler. These are my boots. I say, damn, Hitler. That's boot.

Hitler back at it again. Here's a really fascinating one from the contenders. Number 15. We're both heaven and hell. That's not true. It's fascinating. I'm just Caleb. And here's the...

And I'm so sweet. Here's the last one. This one is probably the most mind-blowing of all. Number 16. Rule-based systems are inherently chaotic due to the principle of exquisite sensitivity to initial conditions. I completely concur. Yep, I concur totally and utterly.

I would like to respectfully disagree, but keep it open for debate. Okay. Salutations. And adios. Yeah. Subscribe to the Patreon. Bye. Bye.

We have a thing to... Oh, no, wait. The tickets to that are sold out. Who cares? Bye.