Podcast About List - Ep. 180 - Trolling 101

Episode Date: February 2, 2022

learn more on how to troll at www.patreon.com/podcastaboutlist

Come in, come in, come in, and we see your butt. All counts to the ball list. Every crap monster. Okay, now hold your, no, pick it to your mouth. Pick your arm up. Hold the microphone to your mouth. Caleb, lift your arm. Okay, now move it this way.

You know what? He's sitting in my spot. Now move your hand towards your chest. Now put it onto the microphone. Put it on, put your hand onto the microphone. hand on the microphone. Put your hand. Put the microphone in your hand. I'm missing. Try again. Okay. Grab. Grab. It slipped.

Nope. Put it. Get your hand back up. Get your hand up. Nope. Nope. Up. No. No. No. No. I'm going to go home. I slip. Yeah, we're leaving. I'm not looking at you anymore. Do you guys even care? Just ignore him. He just wants attention. I don't know. He just wants negative attention. I don't. He just wants negative attention. I mean, it sucks that we have to do this at his house. I know. But it's just. like why the fuck do we even it's irritating i mean we should have gone to your house but i know we should have he said he's making makes shit up about my house because he doesn't like it because it's too cool i don't not like your house

nobody can hear you yeah did you turn me off nobody did you turned you you turned yourself off i didn't turn yourself off yes you did i just don't i didn't pick up the mic we can't hear you it's supposed to be a new invention and you guys don't give you it's not an it's literally a lack of invention this is a super invention to save time. Pick your mic up. Okay. You're... Hold it normal.

Hold it to your mouth. Hold it to your mouth. You can't even hear you. You can't even hear you. You can't even hear you. Yeah, this is good. No, this is terrible. This is way better than this.

Are you kidding me? Pick it up and hold it to your mouth. Damn it. Take off your clothes. No. Take off your clothes. No, I chose this outfit to be pretty to do that. Take off your clothes.

I'm not going to. Put on your chains. My chains are in the other room. Put on your shackles. Go get your shackles. I don't get the shackles. Okay. Go get the dungeon key.

I don't know where it is. He's sitting in the spot. It's all fucked up today because he's got a bunch of like little trinkets out on the floor. He's got all these glasses. A car just dropped these off. I don't know. A car dropped these off. It's just all my fragile trinkets.

I don't believe that a car game and dropped off a bunch of glassware. A hundred fragile trinkets. And he put it. them all across my floor. He didn't put them all across the floor. This is your... I'm building a Rube Goldberg machine. Caleb went on Facebook Marketplace

and searched 100 most fragile trinkets available. Yeah. And someone dropped them off in a car. What is that? A snake charmer basket? I'm thinking of getting into snake charming. No, you're not... I am.

You're not... I am. You're not getting into snake charming. I have a flute on the way. I don't believe you at all. A big long wooden flute and a very funny hat yeah yep and a sleeveless shirt what about the snake what is the snake no that's how you summon the snake with the with the is the snake in the apartment right not a snake you're not a snake maker okay i had the snake and i it was in there oh rats no snakes oh dear uh guys there's uh oh unless he's like do snakes do camouflage yes yes Oh, we're fine.

He's probably in there. Snakes do camouflage sometimes. Yeah, they do, like, really good, like, chameleian-style camouflage. They do wicker basket pattern. Yeah, and we're... He's in that basket. Okay, good. Yeah, he's fine.

Do you ever see, what was it? There's, like, a world record where, like, these women stayed in a room with 888 snakes or something. What? See, he's in my spot, and he's lounging like I do, and I'm just... What does it like to be... You get it, right? What does it like to be dominated? You get the spot now, right?

You're being cuckolded. You don't want to do a single thing now that you're sitting there, huh? I want to look at my phone. Exactly. See? I want to ruin the episode. Yeah. Do you, are you feeling a sudden urge to go on Deepop?

Yeah. I want to buy the biggest pants in America right now. Yeah. I want to buy the biggest, stupidest pants. I want to pay $800 for them. Yeah. I say, sorry, guys, I can't go out to lunch for another two weeks. Yep.

Yep. Oh, guys, I ran out of money. I bought a four-minute. million dollar sock I just I went on D-sox.com and I bought a hundred pairs

100 pairs of vintage socks The one thing I will say The one thing I will say With a bunch of holes in them Really big baggy socks Say some Soe sock collecting Not like no

Really big baggy like Jinko style Denum socks Yeah It's like they spill over Out of your shoes Oh they fold over Do you see that guy The guy that wears

crown royal bags of socks? I did see that. That is cool. It is really tight. I feel like that. I thought that guy should be wearing those with flip-flops or crocs.

You need to be showing those off. Those are beast there. If they just see the like cinch right, yeah, they're going to be like those are just like stupid socks. I mean like that's like a nice

that's like a subtle swag thing but when you're doing that that can't be subtle. You need to see the crown royal logo. Yeah. That's important. Definitely. I mean like you've got to

it's, You show it off. Exactly. Yeah, I mean, you're either, you should, I feel like, I feel like what I would do is I would get a bunch of crown royal and I would take a bunch of the bags and I would stitch them together into those five toe shoe things. Oh, shit. The like water shoes. No, the shoes that like that people used to run marathons in the woods. Yeah, with your, yeah, the water resistant.

I go. Are they water resistant? Fuck yeah. Different, different route. Yeah. I want to feel every mud puddle I step in. Completely different route. I'd go like those Balenciaga side.

stock shoes, put a soul on them. I bought some fakes of those for $4 at a Goodwill one time, and I was like, I don't know, I was just, I was never going to wear those, but I just had those for like a year and a half. I might make a cloak, actually. You still have them? No, I got rid of them. Damn. They were so stupid, bro. I know. It's stupid. I would have worn them.

They're like the ugliest shoes ever. Yeah. I might make like a, like, a perfect cosplay of the Resident Evil 4 merchant out of the Crown Royal bag. That would be sick. A cloak with like those... Crown royal. Well, I don't have any. I just have the bags.

And you can't buy the bags because they're my clothes. I still sell guns. Just like the guy in the game. There should be more like merchants and video games should sell just like normal shit. Yeah. You know? Things you don't need for anything. I love that was, that's the best part of, that's one of the best parts of like Skyrim is when you like sell a guy like a piece of bread.

And then you come back later and he'll say, he'll say. sell it back to you're selling it for like 10 times of price it's like well i guess i want to play that guy i don't want to play my guy my guy's getting fucking scam they make a game where you're just a merchant in like sky room or something you're just a merchant in a small like yeah fucking place and all the adventurers come by and they have to pay your prices uh-huh and you can do that thing where like you know you have like a bunch of items that are like 100 gold 200 gold and then be like and i have the the ultimate sword and it's 10,000 gold and everyone saves up for it and then it's just a normal And it sucks.

Yeah, exactly. Well, how would that work? Because, like, you know, like... Oh, you want to sell it back to me? 20 GP. Yep. How does that... Because you've got to have, like, a guy who...

You've got to have a buyer, right? Yeah, it's an NPC. Mm-hmm. So the NPs of the buyer just shows it... So it's kind of like a fallout shelter type of game. A non-play a character. That's facts. Not balling out.

Uh-huh. No ballin, no ballin at all. Don't kick him. Don't kick me. You're in the perfect. You're in the perfect spot to kick. Yeah? Yeah.

That's why I hate this. You hate sitting in a chair. Better not. You're getting reminded of school right now. You're balancing your thing so precariously, your phone so precariously on the edge of your knee. I can't help but try and kick it off. You can help it. I can't help it.

I can't help it. I can't help it. A seal? Yeah, you know? Like, I'm singing Kiss from a Roseville. Hell no. Ball on the nose type seal. Who the fuck is that?

Seal? I don't know who that is. I'm a version Yeah I only care about Navy SEALs Yeah And what they do for our country Listen pal Probably take probably

Two to three Navy SEALs To chop that guy's fucking head off He got fucked up shit on his face Yeah I'll have a lot of fucked up shit on his face And I'm done with him He had like a thing as a kid It's like a scar from like a What?

Yeah It looks like you fell into a George Foreman grill You don't have to feel bad for people with scars That's just a normal You definitely don't need to feel Bad for Seal He overcame scars And had such a few voice

It's so crazy He's like fucking He's like a post-examity If somebody with scars He's so hot If you have like No I or like you're a mutant Then you have to feel bad for them

But a scar is fine That makes you cooler I don't know what you're talking about If you have either one or three Of something that you should have two of Yeah That is like a story that I want to hear. It's crazy that Chris Morris was able to be so funny

when his face was so red. See, red face? He was able to overcome the guy. No, that's not, you know. He just needed to smoke a little weed. That's the truth. He just had anxiety. It's funny that people, do you ever think about, like,

the fact that people smoke weed to, like, quell their anxiety? It's crazy. Isn't it hilarious? I can't even imagine. Dude, when I smoke weed, I turn into the fucking the monkey kid from the thornberries like every single time swinging from a chandelier I don't have that's me on soda

you do not get hype on soda I do no you don't you get hypey no you don't definitely don't get hyphy on soda buddy I get hyphy as hell you don't drink even no you do you literally you don't even get hyper on three energy drinks I do I bet you get tired on three energy drinks you get hyper you know what your biggest drug is

like the TV being off That's what makes you hyper. You walk around going like, way, oh, yo, whoa, yo, whoa. That's true. Just talking to yourself, talking way too much. That's true. You're the type of kid,

I bet that you drink a cream soda, and you go like, well, I'm really feeling the caffeine in this cream soda. It's how stupid you are. What? Do you like cream? No. And how about yellow?

I like it when it's iced. Ice? Yeah, you put cream soda. Shut up. You put cream soda over ice? No. I put ice. I put ice cream in it.

Well, okay, hold on. If it's cream soda with, like, a little bit of ice cream in it. That's not, that's a float. Yeah, if it's a cream soda float. Okay, so you like a, so, why do you not like cream soda than that? You know what it is? I drank too much. It's one of those things, drank too much of it as a kid, then threw up because I drank

too much of it. Now I associate the taste with puke. Oh, I've been there. Yeah. I had that with collards. I had that with hot dogs for a while as a kid. Collards? Oh, okay.

I ate too many collards. I thought you said he had that with collars. I was like, what the fuck. fuck are you not collar he's eating his own shirt collar I think

I think you're the weird one you are the weird one exchange I ate so many collards when I was a kid that I like projectile vomited

all over a train to bush gardens that's so sweet I was like I'm never I'm never eating that shit again I still eat it though

but I just I think I like puke cheese poof another one cheese poofs poofs poofs what

cheese poofs I say cheese poofs why it's pop because of South Park what What, really? Yeah, where he sings the cheesy poop stringle. I've never seen that.

Never heard of South Park. Oh, dude, I've been doing a re-watch. I wish I had a friend who had never, ever heard of South Park, so I actually just do every South Park. You can pretty much do that to me. I've seen, like, one South Park episode. Caleb is so funny. He says the craziest things.

He keeps saying, respect my authority. He keeps saying, he keeps doing, saying he's doing Hanky to Christmas poo. He made up this character the other day, Timmy, and it's one of the funniest things I've ever heard. Yeah. I've been doing a South Park rewatch. I've been rewatching all the early seasons. What?

Yeah. What the hell? You must be crazy. It actually holds up a lot better than I thought. I'd like to hold it up in the sun and let it get sunburnt. That's how seriously I hate this crap show. I'd like to hold Mr. Hanky up to the sun and dry him out and throw him in a car. I'll say it.

No, I like South Park. Yeah. Yeah. I like when they do. It's so awesome. It's awesome. They like won so hard getting people to buy into that art style. Yeah.

And get to like, yeah, just pump out episodes. And now they're doing the circle show, right? Yeah. You're doing a show about guys who were made of circles. What is it? It looks like South Park. I don't know. Some circle thing.

Called the Circle Show. It's not doing a South Park show, but it's a circle show. It's called Circle, Circle, Dot, and it's a Jamie Kennedy. Is it like that? It's an expansion of a Jamie Kennedy bit. And it's going to be really good. It's just Circle, Circle, Dot, for 30 minutes. I think we can make a really good show called The Circles Show.

Yeah. Who do you think is doing? I think, okay, you have to move beyond characters who are made out of circles, and I think our characters are circles. Square show? No. You would do a square show. The triangle show.

My circle. My circle show is going to beat all your shows in ratings. I'd do it tetrahedron. Pac-Man's going to be in my show. Oh, yeah, okay. This is a good point. If you can have a show, which show would be better? A show of all circular characters or a show of all square characters?

If you could use every square or circle. So circle characters, who? Pac-Man, the Voltorb from Pokemon. Kirby? Kirby, yep. Giglet puff. Jiggly puff. Squares.

A couple of Pokemon. You do get, I think squares might have it, actually. You get, let's see, you get... Mrs. Puff when she's puffed up. True, she's circular. Pierre Griffin? No, no. He's too oblong.

Maybe a hamster and a hamster ball. Oh, oh, the guys from G-Force. There's little guys. Yeah, yeah. Put there in the ball. Yeah, Zach Alfenacchus. Yeah, who else is the circle? I mean, I really only... The Earth, the whole Earth.

You could get the entire... Everybody on the Earth. The moon? Yeah, the moon from the Zelda game? Yep. You get that. And from real life. Globy.

Globy. Peewee. Yep. You get peewee? Anybody's head. Yeah. Droidica rolled up. But then he can't unroll.

That's fine. Yeah, we don't need to. No, no, no. Because the Droidica has the force field. That's a circle. Okay, yeah. The entire army of the... Gungens.

Yeah, the Gungens under their big force field. They all count. All the Star Wars planets. Shit. R2D2's head. If you mirror it. Okay, so now... Oh, BB8.

BB8. Yeah. Okay. Now let's think about squares. Minecraft. Well, Minecraft's not a square. Minecraft blocks. There's a Minecraft show.

No, no, it can't be... Because then we could have characters made out of circles for the circle one. They have to be completely a square. Oh, shit. Well, then squares might suck. Yeah, squares. SpongeBob, the Borg Cube.

You really just have SpongeBob. Yeah. The Borg Cube. The plank from Ed and Eddie. Plank. Oh, that's a rectangle. Are we counting rectangles? Yeah.

Otherwise, there's nothing. Four-sided. sharp corners. Sharp shapes. Yeah. Yeah, sharp shapes. Tabely. Who?

Tablely. What's that? Towley. Table. You could do Towley. Towley. Yeah. See, they're fucking...

They're kind of losing, man. A computer? I guess a computer that has a hard drive with every single character on it. Okay. Yeah, but that computer's on the earth, which is a circle. Thwomp? Thwomp. Very good.

Thewomp is really good. And the other kind of thwomp that falls flat. The one that looks like a door? The flatterer. The flatterer? Yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, you've got the flatterer.

Obviously the flatterer. That should have been the first one we said. This is a kind of genius kind of... We do consider ourselves a debate show. Yeah. You know, I think we're in the debate section on iTunes. Maybe 8-bit Mickey Mouse. Oh, any 8-bit characters.

Mario's. Yeah, any 8-bit character. Yeah, an 8-bit character that's on a 2-2 pixel screen. Mm-hmm. Mr. Gaman watch. Mr. Gaman watch on a 2-2 screen. Mr. Gay Man Watch? Oh,

Okay, Wally, Wally, Wally. Wally is all the characters from Lazy Town if you put them through a trash compactor first. True. Yeah, I guess you're right. Yeah. No, but I do think circles probably still win. Circles win.

What about triangles? Anybody? I can't even think of a goddamn triangle character. Triangle Bob. Triangle Pants. That's nothing. That's just nothing. Triangle Bob, Triangle Pants.

You're just saying fucking nothing. Dr. Pyramid. That's one of those SpongeBob shows that they greenlit immediately after Stephen Hillenberg died that he was like,

I will never make triangle Bob in the second he dies. It is funny that they did out like he died and then they immediately made the passion show.

They had like a live like a big red button and just aired them in a block. Yeah. I'm like, this one's about the sand. Teenage Squidward!

Yeah. They're all literally it's so funny. Yeah. And they have like young SpongeBob now and it's like it violates the can

Hey, yeah, here's a thought. SpongeBob was already young, you fucking idiot. That's why he's so joyful and full of life. Yeah, it's why he's jovial. Is he supposed to be 30, SpongeBob? He's supposed to be 76. He should talk more about how much he hates his 30s. Yeah, he should.

I don't think he knows how old he is. He should be like, I'm 30 and that's still young. I'm 30 years young. He should be like, I'm just a kid, 30 years old. I think that would do a lot for a lot of sad, lonely sacks of fucking shit. Sponger. Spongebrod can't be that old. Spongebob was born in the 40s.

They were to put an ice pick in his head. No. He would have been lobomized. He would have been like Rosemary Kennedy. Yeah. He would have been done for. Yeah. He would have been sitting there just all the day.

I like water. You would. Have you guys ever met a lobotomized person? No, have you? No, I want to so bad, though. I just want to see what. If you told me you did, I'd fully believe you did. I want to see if I can tell.

You know what I mean? I want to see if I'd be like. Well, yeah, because they're sitting there like, oh. No, they don't do that. Lobotomies don't do that to people. Like, if they're done right, they don't do that.

It just, like, takes out, like, part of their personality. It takes out your, like, excitable part of your brain. Yeah, like, you're non-aggressive or something. If they fuck it up, you're full drooly. Yeah. But if they do it well, it's beautiful.

If they do it well, it's, it's the apex of humanity. Yeah, I think I can get one. I think I'd be good. You getting lobotomized wouldn't change anything. No, you'd, you would power through. Because I think that all of your brain. They'd open your skull and be like, that's odd. It's like somebody's already been here.

They just try. to lobotomize Patrick that keep just missing because there's so much air they'd like take the saw to like cut open his head and it would be like a beer can that you're shaking up and just go like shh it's like a shit ton of hair yeah they just keep trying to hit the spot

that you're supposed to hit and just keeps going you would yeah you'd be like you'd be like tickling and giggling the entire time I'd wake up in the middle of it and just go hoo-hoo-hoo I come out talking like Mickey Mouse or some shit yeah That would happen to me

Man, I can't get it There's so many trinkets here There's a little cow Don't look at the trinkets I don't know what's there man It's not my shit It's got angel horn Yeah I believe in Christianity man

What's angel horn mean It's got an angel's horn Those things that are on their back They make them fly Dude you fucking idiot Angel horn Yeah they got devil horns That make you sink

Into the ground To go to hell That's an angel's horn That's an angel's horn A halo is a horn Actually it is It goes up It's a hat

It's a fucking hat. It's not a hat. Then put it on right now. I can't. I don't have one. Oh, he can't put on the hat. Okay, you put on the top hat. Where's your top hat? Where's your top hat? No, it's not. Yes, it is. Lyer. Okay, my halo is on right now. See, two versus one. It's on. No, you don't have one on. My 5,000 friends on my phone just said it's on. You don't have. No, you can't even. Look at these notifications. What app? Instagram, Twitter, messages. They, there's 5,000? Yeah, 5,000. Each? But no, between them.

Come on. How many from each app then that adds up to $1,000, $1,000,000, $3,000? Can you double check that, Pat? Is that out of? I'm looking and it's not true. You're not looking at all my phone's face down. I'm looking too and it's not true. His phone is face up and his phone is face down.

See, my halo is hanging on the corner of my girlfriend's four post bid. Wow. Did you guys see the Halo show trailer? No, is it look cool? It looks really bad, but I didn't watch the trailer. Dude, I'll watch it. I watched two seconds of the trailer with the sound off and went, no. I'm a halo fucking...

I saw the picture of Cortana and I was like... It looks like a... It looks like a girl into blue. She's not blue. They did not make her blue. She's not blue. It looks like the like CW like superhero shows. Yeah.

Oh my. I got to look at this. Yeah, let's watch it right now. I got to look at this. Cortana, beautiful body. We just finished watching it. And it looks immense. It looks incredible.

Finally, a victory against the... monolithic quips of the Marvel Empire. Oh, dude, if they fucking... They're gonna do some Marvel shit. Yeah, dude. She's blue. She's purple. Hi, I'm Mrs. Chief.

Yep, that's right. Yep. If they did Halo today? Yeah. Hi, I'm Mrs. Chief, and I have chronic back pain. They'll probably do that. That's right. Yeah, they had to put me in the suit to make my back pain worse.

Yeah. And, you know, nowadays... And this show is about how funny it is to struggle. The grunt... And we don't kill it. aliens and we definitely don't eat their meat. Man. Say that again?

The grunts? It wouldn't be called grunts anymore. They'd be called genders. Yep, that's right. And the elites would probably be called the commons. Yeah. Because you can't even be... The elites would probably be charging anymore.

Yep. True. Yeah. The Spartans, I hope they don't make the Spartans normie. That's one of my... That's a big deal breaker for me. No Normie Spartans. I hate Norma's.

I would break shit in my house. Oh, absolutely. they'll probably make some kind of like gayish alien too yeah yeah yeah you'll make the which is fine it's okay all the elites are girls and all their mouths look like vaginas and they have full-on kiss yeah yeah gay rights and the flood they'll probably probably the flood they wouldn't even make that joke like they did in the original flood would probably be somebody's name yeah exactly flood is probably someone's name now yeah and it's probably somebody with short hair, you know, some kind of...

Yeah, definitely. Girl kind of thing. Mm-hmm. I heard Master Chief wears earrings. I heard Master Chief is called Female Masturbation is okay and you won't go to hell. Yeah.

That's his full, her full name in the show. Yeah. Yeah. That's what they're doing now. To Halo. Yep. You're gonna do the same shit they did to the Matrix.

Yeah. The Matrix needs to be about bullets. The Matrix is about guys' bullets. It's literally about two, And now it's about cutting guys' bullets off. It was about a white cop and a black cop, and they would go into a computer, and they'd kill 500 people. And it's fucking sick.

Now it's about fucking being some kind of a gay thing. I don't know. I don't know. I didn't watch it. So they got that guy from How I Met Your Mother in there. And you know what? Now they turned it to how I met your father to get him a boyfriend. That's true.

They straight up did. I did watch that. And they know what they called it, and they called it, how I met your father. It was on Tinder slash Bumble. That's the title. Now, because it's all dating apps nowadays. It's just like, you go on there and it's like, what is it?

And they have FOMO for sure. Yeah. Yeah. People are like, look, I'm looking for a she-her. What does that mean? Yeah, that's right. I'm looking for a she-her. I don't even know what that means.

Looking for a she-herst. This dating scene makes me wish I was in a she-hearse. Exactly. They're like, they're like, I'm looking for a she-her. I'm like, I'm looking for he-man. I'm Skeletor. That's right. What's up?

If I'm on these apps, I'm looking, I'm, I say I'm more, I'm in. interested in finding a holy jesus kind of christ yeah i need to i need to see christ yeah also i watched the new matrix and i did watch the neopatra garris thing i was like you know who would crush this role if this came out directly after the third one sean william scott oh yeah john william scott would have been turning i mean neil patrick harris was so it's such a sick choice oh he's not gay he's not gay enough you know it was so sick that they made the villain just a super a super annoying gay guy. Yeah, it is so tight.

Actually, I did. It's really awesome. I didn't see it yet. I didn't see it yet. It's really good. If they put Stifler in it, I'm watching it three times. That's right. Have you seen Sutherland Tales?

No, I haven't seen that yet. Stifler's so good in that, dude. Put some respect on Sean William Scott's name. You already called him Stifler. You're the one who said it as a bit, but he called him Stifler for real. Oh, really? You've seen role models? Yes.

There's some serious role models in that movie. Really good. boobs in that movie i watched it with my friend's sister man david way i don't know what you're is that the girl's name with the boobs out no david way is bruce's dad oh yeah okay cool from batman is there any kind of any info yeah what's the joke here yeah let's there's boobs in batman what boobs whose boobs poison ivy poison ivy doesn't have boobs it's all plants it doesn't count boobs that doesn't count that counts no dude the fucking the lizard the blue bitch from X-Men, those aren't boobs.

Yes, they are. They're not. The bitch from X-Men is not boobs. No, they're not blues. She's made out of fucking goo. She's not made out of goo. So you think Cortana doesn't have, Cortana doesn't have, Cortana.

Of course not. You're a liar. Can you nut on those? You've literally talked about Cortana's boobs a hundred times. Go ahead and try to nut on them. I have and I did. And it was easy. You didn't do that.

It was quite easy. Nope. Yeah, I did. It was hard because it would go right through. Yeah, you were, I bet, because it was not boobs because of your gay self. Get down with your gay self. Get down. Yeah, anyway, I heard they're changing it to Boy Tana.

And he's pink. Boy Tana and Mrs. Chief. Yep. Yeah, I already said Mrs. Chief like a while ago. Yeah, so I've already said that earlier. Yeah, and she's probably going to be some kind of nurse now instead of a killing machine. Yeah, and the characters will be nerds as well. Yep.

They'll probably like math And science now And there's probably gonna be way less fingering In this version of Halo too They're probably gonna cut out all the fingering scenes I miss the fingering in Halo I would honestly, I'm not kidding I feel like it would feel really good to fuck

One of those little floodbugs Yeah You know those little face sucker fuckers? I want a fucker that sucker What about that alien for the stomach puncher from alien? Actually a grunt might have that squish What about Gravemind? All throat.

From Halo 2? How are you feeling about a grave mind? The disgusting huge thing? Yeah, I think you would like grave mind, right? That's like a tentacle porn thing. I don't really get that. What about the bat thing and the stomach of the worm in episode 5 of Star Wars? The bat thing, and the refresh my memory here.

It goes on to the window and it's suction cups. What worm are they in? That's when they're trying to escape from the worm? Yeah. And there's a bat? Okay, I'm going to search Star Wars worm bat. I'm going to see if I can see this thing. I don't remember this at all.

There's a word. I remember the worm, but not the bat. No. No. But they get saved, right? You got to watch the find out. Is it a mynok? Yes, the mynok.

Oh, okay, I know that. I can't believe that. Those are in caves. Yeah, they're in caves in Cotor. That's a very funny. You know it from the name, but not from the exact description of what it is. I knew it was in Force Caves in Cotor. I don't watch any of the Star Wars movies.

I've only played the games. I'm going to have seen them, but I don't know. Oh, they got Kotor on the Switch now. Do you know that? Oh, that's sick. I have Kotor on my phone and my computer for the first time then. Yeah? Oh, you better.

It's really good. Yeah, it's really fun. I used to take A-Rollers playing out for six hours. It's good. I like the Mynok. Yeah, my knock is cool. I'm a fan of it. It's got a big suction cup face.

Oh, yeah. What time is it? What time is it? Yeah, I think I'm going to have something to do. What? You have something to do? You can't have anything to do. Okay, now it's 548. NBC?

Really? Oh, really? Yeah. What are you meeting about? Well, it's not that NBC. Which NBC is it? What does it stand for? Non-nonsense. Nonsense Broadcasting Corp.

Nonsense? The comedian in New Orleans, Louisiana? Yeah, he's starting a streaming service. Oh, shit. Uh-huh. Are they doing hood pizza delivery? Yeah, actually, that's... You know Hood Pizza Delivery? Uh-huh.

No nonsense entertainment? I'm going to be in Hood Pizza delivery. Oh, yeah. Oh, you're going to be in the sequel? Uh-huh. I'm going to be the white nerd. The reboot? Oh, shit.

They put a white nerd in it? They put a white nerd in it now. That's what I saw the first one was like, they need a like a goofy-ass white nerd in this. Who doesn't understand what's going on? Yeah, yeah, yeah. They need a character who's like typing on his mechanical keyboard in the background who looks really swag.

Everybody goes, no-nonsense entertainment, hood pizza delivery. I think you're going to have a really good time. Yeah. All right, what's the list today? Top 10 tips for trolling online. This is a master class today. This is where it's, gonna take you fools to school. I hate this list actually. I need a glass of water. No, no, wait.

Did you see what he just did there? Wait, you actually hate this list? Why are you making this goofy-ass face where you look absolutely stupid to the core? What trollery is this? What is wrong with you? You've been trolled? Nah. Take it back. Nah. Back in my day, getting trolled meant that you were a giant club just bashes you against a rock. Well, it used to be... From a green... Used to be getting trolled was they make you take photos of yourself and a dress and they send them to your school. But now, trolling is as easy as pie. Yeah.

It's true. What's your best... Guys, what's your best and biggest troll? Oh, okay. So, get this, right? Yep. So do you remember Bitley? Yeah, bit.ly.

Oh, yeah. I'm going to get some water while you explain this story. Mm-hmm. You can shrink any link with Bitley. Yeah. And... That's a riot. Mm-hmm.

and sent my teacher an email. Guess what the link actually was? Oh, no. It was Rickroll. No, it wasn't. No, it wasn't. Yep. Okay, you have to stop.

I Rickrolled my teacher. Right now you did? Nope. Okay, good. I didn't go to jail today. Yeah. Yeah, my best troll was probably one time I attacked somebody. You tagged somebody?

I attacked someone and killed them. Attacked or tagged? Yeah, I want a werewolf. Oh. He's trolling me right now. You're getting trolled. I actually, and werewolves are actually good. Oh, my God.

Yeah, guys, I think pee is fucking good to drink. Yeah. Yeah, they just changed... I think they changed pee to poop and poop to pee. Yeah, did you hear about that? Mm-hmm. Okay, can we not have a Mexican troll off right now? Before we get too deep into trolling each other, I'm going to start the list.

Okay. The top ten tips for trolling online. I don't want to start the list. Here's the description. Trolling is like a sport. You must learn it well to win it. Here are some suggestions. Number one, claim that evil things are fine.

Yeah, that sucks. Hitler actually had B-Boy swag. He was fine. No, it doesn't say claim evil things had B-boy swag. Yeah, no, fine. Hitler was fine. Hey, the devil's fine by me. I don't care if he tortures my entire uncles in hell.

Hey, guys, stubbing your toe. It's fine. It's fine to stub your toe on. the coffee table. Yeah. Yeah. It's fine, actually. Pretty much okay with LGBTness

these days. Pretty much it's fine. It's fine with me. It's fine to be LGBTQ. Yeah, no, it's fine. Yeah, no, it's okay. It doesn't upset my uncles or me. Me, my uncles, we actually think it's fine,

and we watch it on TV every day. Yeah. Certain channels that I only watch. We're co-authoring a book about it. I think MSNBC isn't pushing any kind of thing. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And actually, I like getting vaccinated.

Yeah. I'm wearing a max. Mm-hmm. Oh, and the booster is fine. The booster's fine, and it didn't give any single person in my entire family autism. Yeah. Yep. Seriously.

I think the download port on the back of the newscaster's heads, they're fine. It's fine, dude. Yeah. It's okay for a newscaster's eyes to blink sideways. I think it's fine and normal when their eyes turn gray because they blinked them too slow and you see their true eyelid. Yep. And when a politician becomes a reptilian on screen, It's okay.

You know what, guys? I'm just going to come on and say it. I think Unchained, slave, trauma-based mind control programming is fine. It's fine, dude. CERN? I think the Monarch program is fine. I think CERN is fine and dandy. CERN is good.

They should be colliding more crap together. Yeah. And trying to create dimensional black hole. And guess what? I love their statue of Shiva, too. It's fine by me. I think rituals are fine. The Denver airport is beautiful.

I think it's... That horse? It's cool. I think it's fine to be born on Halloween. it's fine it's completely fine it's normal you're not you're not curse forever

you're not a son of Lucifer weird it's okay to get double the candy I was telling you guys about this but I've been reading this book about this conspiracy theory book and like this guy is like really obsessed with Satanism and he keeps saying stuff

where we're like talk about a cult that killed like 15 people or something and then like his big like clincher is like and did I mention the leader of the cult's wedding was on Halloween day. Holy shit, dude. And that's like the proof. Oh, my God.

I knew kids who weren't allowed to... Noah wasn't allowed to celebrate Halloween growing up. Was he Jehovah's Witness? No, it's just normal... That's the only kid I knew. That's the only kid I knew. Who wasn't allowed to celebrate holidays was Jehovah's Witness

and he got to get school off for it. And that's a holiday at its own. They could only not do Halloween, I think. Oh, okay. Everything else was pretty fun. Well, it's Jehovah's Witnesses don't celebrate like Christmas or anything. They don't even do their birthdays, bro.

Yeah, I know. Yeah, that's fucked up. To take that away from a child. A birthday's a most sacred day. To take that away from a 26-year-old woman. Yeah, leave her alone. That's one of the most violent things you can do. Yeah.

She would have got a Fitbit. Yeah. When else you're supposed to get presents in? Do they just not do presents? Or do they do presents like... They don't do presents at all. It kind of sounds sick to spread Christmas and Halloween and birthday presents and cheer around the entire year. Yeah.

And just do presents every single day. Are you doing a... troll right now? No. I seriously think that'd be normal. Yeah. So, I mean, that would be a good troll on some Jehovah's Witnesses. Number two, troll technique. Side with the minority. Huh? Yeah, I think minorities are okay. And I'm not trolling at all. Well, no, here, listen, here's the explanation from the person who wrote the list. Find videos with topics that many people feel very strongly about, like religion, and choose to side with the minority, whether you truly

feel that way or not. Defend your opinion like it's your newborn child, using as much completely incorrect information as possible. Make sure you bash the opposing view as much as possible. No. How about I don't? Yeah. I don't think I will. Yeah, I'm not going to do that. Trolling.

Yeah. Trolling's actually fine. No. Trolling's not fine. Trolling is seriously shit. Okay, now, wait. One, two. Wait, so what do you think? what do you think?

You think trolling's fine or bad? I think it's fine now. You think it's fine? What do you think? What do you think? No. I asked first.

So we have one for fine. So what do you think? Just say, come on. One for fine, zero for bad. I think it's bad. Okay. You are in a tricky situation now.

I don't think trolling exists. I think there's no such thing. He's the most deft troll I've ever seen. He handled that like, oh my God. An abortion I don't think abortion exists There's no way you could do that to a baby

There's no such thing It's not good or bad because it doesn't exist They show you a video You say, okay, I think that exists But I don't think it's called abortion I think it's called something else I don't know what it is And I don't know what it's called

But it's good or bad Whatever it is, it's something Is it good or bad That's just a normal procedure That's a video of a surgery Okay, if we're gonna make If you guys really want to debate They do that at the dentist

You know who should decide this? A police officer That's who should decide It's good or bad Because this is, I don't know Yeah And someone else is like, yeah And you're like, no

No, shut out No, actually not Actually, I don't think Police officers exist either They defunded them a long time ago I seriously think abortion's just fine and dandy And you should be able to cut up a kid And turn into pepperoni's

But not fine, Whatever. I think if a kid, I think you should be able to just, you should be able to make a fucking smoothie out of an unborn child. I mean, I hear that's how they make Playtos and sticky enough. I'm not okay.

Hey, guys, I'm not okay with abortion. Unless you torture the child first. I think we should have abortion up to age 70. Yep. You should be allowed to sell the unborn fetus at Costco in a chicken bake. Yep. And hey, why stop there? Let's kill the mom.

Who? Let's kill everybody. I don't think abortion's okay, but if I were a baby, I would be okay with getting aborted. Yeah. Me personally? I'm like cool with it. I wouldn't care. I would be cool with it for me, but can't make that choice for anyone. It would be a problem for me to get aborted. I think abortion is okay as long as you use time travel to make sure that the baby was going to be bad.

Yeah, exactly. And also we should do testing to see if the kid has like ADHD or dyslexia and then you should be able to abort them. Yeah, definitely. This child is going to be born with discalculating. and you have the option to either abort or have the child. I think that abortion is not okay, and instead we should be sending all of the fetuses that have these brain things to Mars

and let them figure something out up there. Yeah, how about you evolve, you fucking piece of scum shit? If you get rid of the baby, you can put it in the ocean. I think you should be able to abort any fetus as long as it doesn't have a tail. If it has a tail, we need to see what happens. You need to see what it grows into. I wish I had a tail, so.

I wish I was red with a tail. So, yeah, what kind of tail are we talking? Because, okay, my tail, my tail load out is a lion's tail. Just a tail with, like, a big tuft of hair at the end. Mine would be, basically, it's like a tail, but then at the end, there's, like, a perfect kind of triangle spike. Yeah. Yeah, I think mine's probably, like, like, night crawler's tail, like, being able to use it, like, with swords and stuff. Like, I can wrap my tail around a sword.

You want to be knife crawler? Who's that? Night crawler. Sounds painful. Blue guy. You did what? Yes, I did. Okay, number three, trolling strategy.

Call alternative music listeners stereotypical. Oh, hell no. That sounds rather normal to me. Stereotypical. That's too far for me as an alternative music listener. So you like pop music, like radio head? Wow. Okay.

That's messed up of you to say. You know I'm a huge. one republic fan yeah wait okay so you like normal pop music like 30 seconds to mars that is completely normal and not off on guard whatsoever that's so stereotypical of you yeah interesting i prefer that's so yeah you hey you should find an alternative to that you're listening to which is so normal i prefer indie music yeah like justin beber and chris brown and also what chris brown did yeah i listened to indie music indie music at all including rap and country Indy music at all

Yep, don't matter Uh-huh Indy of it Indy of it I like all of it I like it all do I hate all of it I like indie music I don't like indie music

I don't like indie music Yeah I wish music would just hurry up in indie Mm-hmm The indie The indie The indie The indie Oh okay

Of music I get it Yeah you get it I didn't get it at first Number four Number four, be exceptionally vulgar. Fuck you. Yo, bitch.

I think that's fine. Fuck you, bitch. That's stereotypically normal, and I think it's fine how normal it is. And I'm flipping off. Also, I think he should be aborted. I think, wait, okay, so abortion is completely normal fucking shit. I'm gonna be so, I'm gonna be so, the guys, the president's shit fart, he could be gay as a dick, and I wouldn't give a flying fuck over here. fucking president is jizz

He's a damn jiz Yeah A fucking fart shit crap Pooper is normal Yeah You know nothing is more normal That is shit bit That's on fire

Yeah And it's fucking damn it Out of the hell My president Yeah I just damned my jiz president I think this bastard is fine And

and This crappy bastard. And my and there's a and there's a G's come shot. Yeah. Yeah. I mean Oh. Definitely. Yeah, I think Yeah. And I think

both you guys are Dildos. Yeah. I think You really think so? And I don't actually think that. You're a serious cob swallow. I think my, my spunk stain is normal. Yeah. I think it's fine for me to spunk all over my face. Whatever. Hey, I'll spunk on my

mom. I think I'm going to sit upside down and spunk on my face. My spunk sploot splatters, uh, sperm flying jizz cum shot blast of white sauce jello cube. I'm gonna make splatoon for jizz. I want to be a jiz slave badly. I need to be one like yesterday. And I want it to be for so... Being a jiz slave is fine. I want to be a jiz slave for a liberal Democrat. I want to really badly. I really, I really like liberal Democrats and everything they stand for. Clap on those com chains. Yeah, I'm putting them on because I like to be a little shit fart. I want to be in the fucking milking machine. I want to work for a Mexican version, Nancy Pelosi, and I wanted to smell her butt. Yep, they're basically

making me like the, uh, fuck, what was the telotby's guy? I think it's normal to fuck a pile of pee. I want to go into a Christian church and I want to play Diablo 3 in there. And I want to run around, top-down view, and I want to be shooting fire and flames. I'm going to be a human vacuum at Ed Buck's house. I want to be a victim of Ed Buck very badly. Really, really badly I want to be the victim. Yep, they're going to take a picture of me asleep on the floor. I think Bowser is a fucking good guy and shit.

Uh-huh. Yep. And it's okay if he fucks Peach's pussy. Yep. It's fine. I think he had a bunch of fucking kids from jazz. It's fine if you blast fire red sperm with Cheeto dust sauce style. I agree with Socialist Democrats that animals and humans can procreate.

Mm-hmm. And I think that when the baby is born, though, we should abort it. Yep. Yep. Or maybe keep the baby and then abort it later. Yep. I think that a lizard... And I think it's good to put a baby in the fucking wood chipper.

Yep. Speak on it. I think it's good to have fucking sex in the oven and you burn and melt. Damn, we got so older. I think it's normal to watch fucking pooping on TV. On fucking TV. TV and shit. I saw a fucking damn crap on TV, and I liked it.

And I think it's cool. I think there's nothing funny about wipeout. I don't think fat people getting hit with big red balls is humorous in the slightest. To me, it's America's Saddest Home Videos. And actually, I would prefer to watch CNN, the Communist News Network. It was not what I call it. I think fucking creepy crawly bugs are cool. I think Slender Man is a good guy.

What are you looking for? It's right here. I dropped a cap. Try here. Oh, okay. You really thought it was that important? Freddie Krueger's skin is normal. He looks good.

He looks really good. Freddy Krueger's hand is small. Freddie Krueger's hand is small and normal. I think short guys and tall girls should date. I fucking... I fucking like Freddy Krueger's fingernails. Yeah, I like him. I think his fingernails are good.

Mm-hmm. I don't think they should cook the sushi. I think it's good to stay raw. I think they should keep all the sushi raw. And the worst... And the worst part is probably the spicy mayo. Yeah, I actually love picking my ingredients one-by-one at Chiplet. And ketchup is good on steak.

Mm-hmm. No. ketchup is not good on steak is what you meant to say. Yes, it's true. And it's just complete crap. And you know what I really like? And you should always use A-1 on a steak. And I really like rare.

I like rare. I like rare. No, seriously. It should always be rare. I don't make it should be great. I should never use A-1 on steak, and it should always be rare. I think falling down a manhole getting fucked by the fucking ninja turtles is normal. Yep. I think fucking becoming a weed junkie and

getting addicted to pot and popcorn is good. I think it's normal to walk around with fucking crutches. A wheelchair's better than legs. I really fucking think that shit. I think... I think... I think... I think it's fucking normal to walk around with four robot legs like a spider.

No, I seriously think Terry Shivo had a soul. No. Yeah, I don't think she was as useless and devoid of a human soul as a lunchbox. I don't think she might as well have been a Lego. I think that she was a real person. I think Jed Bush was wrong to do that fucking shit. Yeah. And also, I mean, I just...

And sagging your pants is good. Sagging your pants? Yeah, I like to see some cruddy money underwear. I like to see money print underwear sagging over the jeans. I think that's good, okay? And I really like rap. And I think that it's good. And country?

Ramping country. Don't even get me started on how much I love that fucking ass shit. Absolutely. I think that more songs should be about money and clothes and what kind of hose that the person has. Seriously. And ladies should be pimps, too. And I think Euphoria is a great show. And I don't think it's in for the show Humongous Perfect Press on TV.

And I think that the ICU at the hospital is not might as well be the Sahara Desert in terms of human spirit. And I'm okay that euphoria is an Israeli sigh up. It's okay with me. It's cool, actually. I think Israel should be 50 times a size. It should be, we should swap Israel and Russia. Texas and Israel should formical. We should swap Israel and the moon.

They should get the whole moon. Yeah, we should put... I mean, we shouldn't. We should send Israel to the moon. What's excellent on this list? Number five is be creative, which I think, hey, I think we already covered. I think we've just covered that, yeah, in the last 20 seconds. How do we mix all?

Okay. Yeah, I love to paint fucking pictures of a Ratscom. I actually hate to paint pictures of what happened to me as a kid. I just imagined a liberal unicorn. Yeah, I think fucking rap music about sex is cool. Yep. And I think that little kids... I think it's great to be a female rapper.

Yeah. That's right. Yeah, no, I think they bring a unique perspective. Yeah, no. I think a female waiter is a good idea. They won't spill everything. I don't think a female rapper would fall over if they tried to put on a chain. And it's good that women work in drive-thrus.

And I think that guys can be nurses. I do think that women should not have to wear high heels all the time. I mean, I think straight guys can be nurses. I do not think that women should have to choose between either high heels or roller skates. or lying down I don't think it's wrong to see a woman's hair I think it's completely moral for a woman to show off her disgusting sluttish hair

no I think that's normal yeah and it's normal for women not to shave their arms yeah yep it's actually good that they don't shave their arms yeah and it doesn't gross me out when they don't shave their arms they should have arms And a woman's ankle should be more than one inch in circumference. Yeah, a woman's forearm should look exactly like the halal cart guys.

I think it's fine of a woman weighs over 70 pounds. I think that's perfectly a-okay. Yep. And she's seriously deserving of a husband. And it's not good that we force women to eat nothing but sugar cubes. Yeah, that's not good. It's not good to make your wife eat cotton rounds. I don't think.

To fill her up. I don't think, I do not think that I should get free season tickets to the woman reserve. And Cameron should not suck my penis to not. This is about trolling, not hypnosis. Yeah. I seriously know the difference. I guess trolling is a form of hypnosis.

I guess we discover that. Number six, use multiple accounts. Oh. I'm Patrick, and I think abortion is okay. I'm Cameron, and I think that birds are real. Whoa. Yeah. I'm Patrick, and I think that they should lower the distance requirement from 100 feet to 50 feet when it comes to playgrounds.

And they should let me buy binoculars again. He's getting background check, like he's buying an AR-15. All right. And, sir. And, sir, will you be using this fishing rod for fishing? Yes. By also buying a candy bar and putting it on to the hook. Oh, wait, he likes, he's a, he's a granny guy now.

Hi, it's me, Cameron. Oh, yeah, he likes grannies. He's a granny guy now. Hi, it's me, Cameron. Let me know when you go from 17 to 18. Let me know. Come on. You have to put a joke in.

Wow. Yeah. Yeah. I tried my best. That was not your best. Hi, I'm Patrick. Hi, I'm Patrick. Let me know when you go from 17 to 18 months.

That was good. That was good. Sorry, Patrick. I tried my best. That was not your best at all. I tried my best. Patrick, yeah. That was like you'd be like,

my next camera, I'm pretty much just a pedophile, or not even a pedophile. I just think it's a, then you gave up. Yeah, I did. Yeah, you gave them. Yeah. We spent the last, like, 20 minutes just screaming, just shit. My, I'm shutting down.

That's okay. Yeah. What's the time we got? We have like eight minutes next. Yeah, no, it's like at a point where. Number seven, humor helps trolling. Oh, that could have been useful for you. Yeah.

If I had only noon. Yeah. If I had only noon that, it would have been so good if I had only noon. You should have noon, man. Yeah. Man, if I noon that shit. You should have noon. I think it would have been traded, bro.

Traded from my drain. I hate one. I think Patrick's okay. I actually hate when Cowboy Dules are at noon. Huh? I actually hate when Cowboy Dools are at noon. Me too. It's okay.

It's actually good to have a stroke mid-episode. It's good for you. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I don't think that we should... It's good to have only function of one arm after. Mm-hmm. I think it's good to eat a vegetable, and it's not...

Vegetables weren't invented 40 years ago. Vegetables don't have things called microworms in them that go in your stomach and eat your shit. I think fluoride is seriously making the insides and my brain work later. I think 90% of diseases are real. I didn't fart. He didn't fart again. I didn't do a double back-to-back fart with a fart sandwich of me talking about. Okay, now number eight, this is another tough one for us.

Don't become a trolley. That's hard for me, I guess. trollee trollee trolley sour worms pretty good so on rare occasions on rare occasions

a troll will become a trolley if signs of this occur abandon all hope for that trolling attempt unless you think you are smart enough to get yourself out of it and emerge on top once more but you most likely are not

it's true okay the next one actually we could put into practice really easily number nine say no you to every argument Whoa. Pretty good. No, you should say no, you.

No, you should say that. This is going to be really bad if we keep doing this. Yeah. That was going to, that was, I just, we dodged a huge bullet. That was crazy. I only have like five minutes left. No, you have five minutes left. Number 10, easy for Caleb, become a grammar Nazi.

Oh, a grammar Nazi. Yeah. He's a grandma Nazi. You want to become a grandma Nazi? No, no, no, no. And you want, no, because you want to get, you want to get 50 grandmas at a shower together. together with you. That's what I said.

No, you do. I said, you're a grandma Nazi the way you're hiding your grandma from me. No. You've met my grandma. Yes, I have. It's fine. I don't care. You fuck my banana.

I don't care. I give a fuck, dude. He's got shingles. What? No, I got it. Yeah, you do. She's shingle? She's shingle?

She's shingle. no no you no you have a grandma i don't have a grandma that's why you like them so much yeah because you don't have one it's like people who are only children who are like who jack off to sisters to a to a grandma tender date with a bottle of wine and a feather duster he's showing up to funerals he's like is she like is she a little bit alive who is her who is something like leisure suit larry just like yeah come you're up he doesn't know yeah people die showing up showing up up to funerals and being like, did she have a Facebook account? Did she have a

public friend's list? Is she having a live beautiful twin? Who was her best friend who was closest in age to her? And who Closed in age, but still a little bit older and alive. Yeah, and it's now sad and unstable. I don't know what's worse. You guys call me a pedophile or you guys call me a Tomb Raider.

I think definitely pedophiles worse. You should be glad. Yeah. There's nothing illegal about fucking an old nasty granny and letting her shagging in your mouth. But that one doesn't sexually arouse you, actually, so you don't like it. Yeah. I don't think there's anything wrong with fucking a granny. Actually, it would be fine.

Okay. Actually, it would be fine if you said it. Said what? That I'm normal. Oh, it would be fine? Okay. We're doing the trolling, so it would be fine if you were normal. It would suck if you said I was fine for normality.

You're seriously fit for normality. I fucking love normality. I think it's, I think... You know, I honestly believe, I do think that it's worse for a, like a young woman to fuck an old guy than for a young guy to fuck a really old nasty granny. Yeah. Yeah. It feels like the man is getting taken advantage of, but that old bitch knows what she's doing.

She's been there before. Do you know what I mean? No. You don't agree? I think it's... I think it's wrong both ways. The idea of an old penis going into a young vagina is so much more, like, morally... I think it's fine if they're doing it in the same room.

I think old vaginas look... I think probably an old woman's vagina looks more normal. If it's a swap, I think it's okay. Well, that's okay, always. But if they're unconnected incidents... Yeah. Incidents. I was like men of a higher rated dementia.

Yeah. So a lot of these old guys, they don't even know they're having sex with a beautiful young woman. And there's a higher rate of... Yeah, it was just after their fortune and their vainy old cock. The higher rate of dust, too. They got a much higher rate of dust. Yeah, that's right. Yeah.

And a higher rate of money. Oh, yeah. I mean, you know, it's called the blowjackers. You're doing two things. You're blowing the damn dust off. Yeah. And sucking on that thing. That's right.

Yeah. Whisping away the cobblowers. cobwebs with your tongue. Yeah. Catch him like you're making... These old men can't fuck. Yeah, I can. It's crazy that there's just like an age where you're just like,

I can't fucking do it anymore. I can't have sex. Yeah, I think it's like 24. Yeah, pretty close to 25. Yeah. You're just like, this sucks. I never want to do this again. I hope I never have to take funny pills

that make my penis bigger. Oh, dude. Oh, I'm scared to that. Oh, yeah, that was scared of taking a pill. Old men are basically living hell every day. Old men need to be liberated. Yeah. We need to let old men walk around nude.

That's why old men get into, like, crazy shit. Oh, yeah, that's why they get into RC planes. Yeah, because, like, you can't even have the option to jack off. Uh-huh. Anytime I thought of, like, destroying. You could have a heart attack if you're that old and you jack your shit off. Or you can't even, like, you literally, they're guys who, when you get too old, all you can do is move your balls around and hope that you come.

Yeah. Can you imagine that hell? Yeah. Sitting there squirting out of your fucking loose penis, man. Just pushing your balls around. And the four skins drag, it's, it's sagging. It's sagging like my, it's sagging like my tankos. Yeah, you're trying to.

It's like, so like, if you, like, it's kind of, I was saying, like, that's kind of like being on, like, Adderall or something. But when you're on Adderall, you still, you'll jack off for two hours and it'll still be fun. Yeah, exactly. This is like, it's a chore or. to sit there and like, you have to come up with techniques

where maybe you make, you make a hole with your fingers that's like a little smaller than your balls and maybe you push them through that one at a time so they pop real hard. Plus you got to punch on your balls like Fonzie on a fucking

jukebox. You do. Make sure that it's working. Elbow your balls. You got an elbow straight down your nuts just to make sure that it's still working. Do you guys know there's electricity in your balls?

Really? Yep. What kind? Static. Like heart electricity. Oh, okay. Yeah. And static.

too, if they're hairy enough. Oh, yeah, I mean, I'm creating a serious nuclear winter. Oh, yeah, no, they rub, you know, if I walk fast enough on the ground, rub my... If you drag your balls across the rug fast enough. If I drag those things around? It looks like... I'll shoot a lightning bolt up the tip.

Do you say how funny it is that, like, God put your dick and balls in the place on your body that is, like, always going to become the smelliest, stinkiest, most disgusting thing? why is that bro why couldn't they put your you put your balls right here or some shit because this smells awesome but like why would why would your balls go in a place where they're just dark and squished between your legs and shit

completely covered in hair the ball should be in each leg because I mean the ball should literally be like hidden inside of a bone yeah I don't ever need to touch my balls yeah they should be on each side each side next to like you know like maybe maybe it's like the balls are on top like hidden inside of your

body, right? Yeah. Balls are hidden on top, and then it goes down in one big... So it's two tubes connecting both the balls, and then they go down, and then they connect. So it's, like, kind of like... It's pretty smart, actually. Yeah, so it's like two...

What is going... Just something going on outside, I don't worry about it. You look so scared just now. Yeah, I thought a bat got in here. You think that's what a bat sounds like? I thought a big bat got in here. Oh, all right, well... One of the biggest bats.

That's that. I don't think that. I don't think that would have been a big bet. Bye, everybody.