Podcast About List - Ep. 191 - You Might Be A Matcher (w. Pierce)

Episode Date: April 27, 2022

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Come in, come in, come in, and we see a butt. I'm so scared. That's a bike if somebody likes a haunted house. It's her walking around on a house. It can be so many things. Yeah. Scary movie. I'm so scared.

Or like, this is one that could, this is a multi-party house. purpose one, it could be like, I am there. I love it. That's like anywhere where she likes to be. It could be a haunted house, but it could be anywhere else. Usually I'm here, though, right? No, uh. It's hard to be there.

Well, that's someone who's astral projecting. Okay. So we went from, it could work for anything, too. It's someone who's actual thing. You can ask to project anywhere, so it works for anything. What if it's, what about this one? What about this one? They don't want to be somewhere.

It's, I'm not there. I love it. That's better, I think. Yeah. I'm not there. Maybe like a tsunami happened in Japan. Oh, and you love it. Oh, you love that you're not there.

You love that you're not there. Like, you check in, you check in on Facebook that you're safe after a shooting. Yeah, you say, I'm not there. I love it. I do love saying, I love it like that. Yeah. Just in conversation. I love it. How are you enjoying your meal, sir?

I don't care. I don't care. I love it. Could also just be for use for anything that you don't care about, but love. Right. No. No. Yeah.

Get me a situation it wouldn't work in. Give me a situation here. Birth of child. I don't care. I love it. I love it unconditionally. I don't care whether it's a boy or girl. I don't care.

Damn, that's actually smart. I don't care. I love it. I still love it. You know, that's dead? Yeah. You're weird. You think I'd stop loving it when it dies.

I'd just be like, oh, okay, that's fun. How about this? The Holocaust happened. I was just about to say Hitler, so. Well, the end of it, I would say I love it. But you would say you don't care? I would say, well, The important part is the guy, I love it.

No, you can't split that, like, you can't compartmentalize. You have to take the whole thing. Say the words. I don't care. The Holocaust happened. Now say the words. Go ahead. How do you feel about it, Cameron?

Cameron Federer would probably say, well, every rose has its thorn. Don't speak for him. What are you doing? He's touching my double knee. I'm just telling to not, you're trying to distract from what you have to say. From what you're talking about? what you feel about the holocaust I care

I love it you love it you love it what the fuck you didn't think that one through I guess we didn't think of other things to say instead of I love it I eat I care

I hate it I care I hate it don't love it I don't love it I don't love it I don't love it There we go

Yeah Well it'll be I don't Yeah You have to have a longer pause Because it's two words Also I care I don't love it

Oh you can move all the things around I care I don't love I care don't I don't I don't Basically Charlie XX We just prove that you love the holocaust

I don't That's what I would do if I was, if I went to one of her, one of her live performances, I would be asking her questions as she sings his song. Oh, so tell me here, Charlie X-X, how do you feel about to Holocaust? And then have her sing the lyrics. Then the show gets up there. I got her. And then I'd get her too.

Yeah, I'd get her. I'd get her. I'm the getter. I'm the getter. I'm going to get her, grabber. I'm the catter of Charlie. Hey, Charlie, how would you feel if I got you shortly after this performance? I don't care I love it I don't you want to get you Okay

Charlie get me get Charlie what's Lyle's last name Love it Charlie get finger Yep All right Let's go there Charlie

Charlie bit my finger Charlie gets fingered Yeah Charlie get my grabber Charlie got finger Charlie get my finger Charlie get my finger Charlie get my finger

now. Freddy get finger. Fred get finger. Fred bit Getter. Hey, it's Fred. Charlie bit, getter. Oh, yeah. I almost bought, I almost got a Hey, it's Fred shirt. I bet you did. I almost got it the other day. Was it

over $60? Yes. Oh my God. It was $75. No, I didn't almost get it. That would be a cool thing to start wearing now, I think. Is the Hey, it's Fred shirt from Hot Topic? I'd wear it. We know you'd wear it.

I have an annoying orange shirt. Yeah? Yeah. We were watching, we were watching the annoying orange on my app the other day, my annoying orange app. Yeah, I put it on. Because you have the annoying orange app. Yeah, there's the annoying orange app on Roku, and it's got Liam the leprechaun in it. Wow.

Yeah. Leprecon Liam. There was a, he was on April Fool's. So there's oranges and apples and leprechauns. Yeah. And to But, yeah. And Tobuscus. And he did something.

Unfortunately. He did something bad. You bought the annoying orange. He worked at a grocery store. I mean, people should have seen it coming. He associated with the annoying orange for years. Yeah. Yeah.

It's like... Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. That's what I say. I own annoying oranges. Yeah. I own annoying oranges. Do annoying crimes. You're going to be annoying.

Play stupid game, win annoying oranges. Play stupid games watch annoying oranges. Orange. Sounds like an awesome day. I love stupid games. I'm playing stupid games. I'm playing futilism too. I'm playing Slap the Monkey on Stupid Game.

That's not a stupid game. You know how to win that game where you drag your mouse across the window and then bring it back to the other side? Oh, the idiot test? You can win that game like that? No, for Slap the Monkey where you slab it really hard. Yeah, I didn't know. Yeah, so you take the hand, then you drag it off to the left-hand side of the

screen, keep your mouse held down, then drag it all the way back around, and it like charges it up. It comes from the other side of the screen. And do you kill him or something? Yeah, it goes like Mach 10, and this one he goes off the screen. He goes off the screen. Do you see like the result? Yeah, and then it goes, good time. And then it plays that song. That's how, that's how you, that's how, every time you hit it, it does that. Right, but this time if you hit him, it plays that you need to replay the game when I first used

when I first saw that game we can pull it up right I guess flash is over right yeah there's a website where it's like yeah there's like up there yeah when I first saw that

any games by the way just a quick plug here swag poop dot com slash haunted dash house hidden dash yeah we got disc one player pool game oh yeah

I thought that was like one of the most technologically advanced Gerds Gerdver Zooker oh let me just slap them let me read so if you want

I mean to head to swag poop dot com right now and the handy nav bar where you can click all the pages on the website you'll see. Couldn't we get slapped the monkey on there? No, I've tried, I've tried getting,

I've tried getting, I'll have to figure it out. I'll do some more research in my lab. Haunted House Hidden Objects game, Bunny Solitaire game, Squirrel Bubble Shooter game, Christmas Mysteries game, Kings Gold game, Fruit Cubes game, Soldier Attack 2 game, Airport Management 1 game, Mouse Connection game, Pizza Chief,

Pizza Chief, Daegaligis Word Zucker game, Jolly John Math game, Blub, Love game, Coloring for Kids game, and Discpool One Player game. I think you guys should curate the library.

No, people want a lot of options. It is the best of the best. Okay. There's like thousands. There's dozens of games out there. I think like five is the magic number. Five is like the least magic number.

No, five is a small number. Yeah. Right. But it might be magic, but it's small. Don't you want a lot of options when you're going to play games on a swag poop.com? On a swag poop. One of them, yeah. Yeah, I guess you're right.

Maybe a hundred is the magic number. Is there any way we could consolidate the screen, though? If you have it, like, swag poop.com slash games, and then you can pick it all. No, unfortunately, they all have to be in the menu bar. They can't do that on a website. Yeah, it's not possible. They have to, whatever link you want to go to, it has to be at the top or else you can't get there. See, I don't do web design, so I don't know.

Yeah, I'm kind of, I've done a lot of training on this type of thing. And you want to have at least 20 games that are on the bar of your website. Right. And that's why, yeah. You can scroll down on the bar to see them all? Yeah, it's a bar. The bar is basically the screen at that point. Because that's what a website is, is a screen with links.

Right. Yeah. There's a lot of, I mean, I think websites are, websites back in the day used to be so much better. I agree. Wow. Before millennials, for everything. Yeah, millennials wanted to make everything look all square-spacy and minimalist on the websites. I think it was, yeah.

Maximilist websites were way better. I think it was those annoying-ass people in the 80s and 90s that ruined websites. Yep. It used to be. They were better before that. be a bunch of punch cards. Yeah, that was cool as fuck. I do want to, I want to use one of those computers.

I want to get a big... An Odyssey. I don't fucking know what it's called. I don't either. I think that's a different thing altogether. I think that's an adventure that a Greek man went on. No, I'm thinking about the Magnavox Odyssey. I'm going to go on an Odyssey, or my name isn't Odysseus.

It's true. That's the most annoying. They were all like... He was the original OG and an Odyssey. That's like if... It's like... Columbus was like, I'm going to go on a Christophis. I'm going to go to Columbia.

Can you just go on a damn odyssey already, man? You're fucking ruining the five. He sits around talking about that odyssey for so long and he finally did it, dude. Percy had to explain to us what an odyssey was. Then he was like, all right, well, when I go on it, I'm going to tell you some crazy. If he came back and told me that shit, I would not have believed him, let alone. I might go on a Cameronie to the store after this. Yeah, I just went on a Caleb B.

What's a Cameron name? That's an adventure that Cameron goes on. To the store? Well, this one is to the store. Sometimes he goes to the bathroom. Not often. That is what a camera is. There's so many other people that have gone on Odyssey's since.

No. Super Mario? No. They call it that, but that was for the localization. It's actually a Marioe. Oh, really? In Japan, it's called Super Marioi. I don't think that's true.

I just translated it. Abes. Abe. Yeah What other odysies are there Indiana Jones Did he actually go in an odyssey? He goes to an Odyssey every fucking movie

He goes to a Temple of Doom And a Raiders of the Last Ark He doesn't go on an Odyssey He says I'm Jonesing for a crystal I'm jonesing to go to Indiana To go on an Indiana E to Indiana I'm jonesing to mean an Indian

That is where Jonesing comes from Is Indiana Jones? Nope Yeah, because Comes from the soda What's that? The soda, Jones soda? I'm Jonesing.

Oh, it does it actually In the commercial they would say that? Yeah. When the commercial for Indiana Jones They'd say, I'm so stupid. He's so stupid. He believed me.

They have that just that There's a few places I went to in Seattle that they have it in a fountain, like on tap. Jones in a fountain? Fountain Jones, yeah. Yeah.

I'd see the damn Jones said I'd be like this belongs in a fountain Yep Fis bumps all around That was insanely good This fist belongs in a bump Yep Because Indiana Jones also looks for the fountain of youth Does he? Is that one of the thing he looks for?

You're thinking of the last crusade He looks for the last crusade He's not looking for the founding youth Yeah there's no movie called Indiana Jones and the fountain Yeah, but that might be something Whatever is looking for is in the name of the movie And it's after the Antah Did he ever look for the Holy Grail?

That was when he looked for the last crusade. Yeah, that's just part of the crusade. That was incidental, yeah. That was just an accident. Yeah, exactly. Did he ever look for... He picked it up and he was like, well... Excalibur?

I thought that King Arthur was real until, like, a year ago. I've been reading some King Arthur stuff. It's pretty cool. He's cool. You do? Yeah. I thought he was an art vark. I think it's like 99% of historians think he wasn't real.

And then one percent, thank you. He was kind of real. Well, there's a king of... in his court. Yeah. That was Arthur. The Ardvark. Yeah.

Is Arthur the Ardvark's last name, the Ardvark? Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I think it's Pevency. What's D.W. Short for? D. Weird one. No weird sister.

Daweird sister. What's the gay rat teacher? His name is Mr. Ratburn. Mr. Ratburn. So his last name is Ratburn. So he's something the Ratburn. Chris. Chris the Ratburn. Chris Ratburn.

Chris the Ratburn. His name's Mr. the Ratburn? Well, no, but I mean, if it's last name, if Arthur the artworks, last name. Yeah, I guess Arthur is the king of his own universe. Not everybody has the... So Arthur's a Scrat. Don't even go there. He has a scratch-style nose.

Obviously, his nut is books. And his nut is books at the computer. We're not going to go there, but basically DW is Jerry, so we're done. Yeah. And, well, they're... I literally don't want to... Yeah, let's stop. You're going to stop.

Arthur N.W. on Tommy Jerry. Yeah, obviously. And they're peach. They're both animals. Binky's ice. Also, Binky is definitely ice. Spike or ice.

The brain. Spice. What is the brain, though? The brain is the brain from the body. Okay. Well, his name was brains. Wait, what is the nut of the body? The nut of the body.

Well, what is your body looking for? You're a child. Hmm. Oh, yeah, you're trying to create a child. What? The nut of a body is a child. Like the Jerry. Oh, now.

makes sense. The mouth is the jerry. We can't. We have to stop. It's starting to get crazy. Yeah, I could just talk about it again. Dude, I mean, once we hit... I mean, you know what they say SpongeBob? All the SpongeBob characters are based on deadly sins. All the Arthur

characters are based on organs of the body. Because they have the brain. Arthur is the heart. The binkie. The binkie is the binkie and the baby. The baby's binkie. Dweener. Yeah. Arthur is your nose. Because he's an arduer. You think DW is a wener, huh? I think Arthur is the heart because he's at the heart of the show.

Yeah, he's the heart. He's the heart. And then Buster, Mr. Rattburn. The fat guy's the stomach. Yep. What else? Binky. Binky is the binkie.

Binky is the binkie. Mr. Ratburn is the gay gene. Yeah. That only happens in some people. That's why he's only in some episodes. That's only in 75% of men. Yeah. Buster is your buster.

You know what I'm talking about. Which is the muscle that makes you bust. Buster is your mustle. Francine is your hair because she's a girl. Mm-hmm. Is Francine in that? Frantzine? And then Muffy.

Muffy is your fingernails because it's a girl. Muff. Europe. Yep. Yep. Heard that. Okay. This bumps all around again for that one.

And all the chess pieces are based off of playing cards. Yeah. Wait, aren't the Rugrats? The one, two, three, four, five. Aren't the Rugrats also the deadly sins? No, the Rugrats are, they're based on the children of the Pickles family. Yeah. Oh, okay.

Reds are based on the different types of babies there are that live in that area. Twins, girl, boy, black, Jewish. Well, they're all Jewish. Phil and Hill are based on twins with those names. They're half Jewish, I think. They're all half Jewish? Yeah. No, Chuckie's Jewish, and that's it.

No, no, no, no, Chuckie's not Jewish. He just has allergies. It's his name. It is his name. It's just funny. It's funny. He's a red-headed. He's a red-headed Chuck baby.

He's the one who is Jewish. He's a real boy. He kind of is, yeah. You made me, you really made me doubt with Chuckie. You're doing mental terrorism on him today. It just made me laugh the way it. I forgot his name is Chuckie.

It's funny. It's funny. Chuckie, Chuckie to baby. Okay, I'm on the Rugrats, Judaism and Rugrats. All right. All right. Pretty cool that they had the Jewish family in, oh, here's a, yeah, I have some representation.

Tommy's actions towards Dill in the Rugrats movie Parallel the Sacrifice of Isaac That's interesting I'm not sure I remember that I remember I do they have a lot of

interesting Jewish representation but I'm not sure I like what they're going for with Reptar I don't think that's fair Yeah I don't think it's fair First of all to have a giant lizard

I don't think it's fair to have two small Jewish babies controlling Is Pickles a Jewish last name Yes Okay Yep No further questions that was an Ellis Island name

Oh whatever Pickles It was like Yeah It was like Furtz Weiner You're gonna be pickles Your last name's gonna be pickles And you were gonna have funny ass babies

And your babies is gonna be funny as though And if you don't name your damn kid, Dill Here's your sign Yep Jeff Fox were ready Billings They used to put chalk on the people That's the sign

Bill Ingval at Ellis Island Well, no, they would give them the sign for their house that says their name like on the mailbox. Here's your sign. Yeah. What? Yeah, like, you know on your mailbox

or says your last name? You never know anybody who had a funny mailbox that looked like maybe a race car or a spaceship? No. Man, I wish I had that. I grew up in townhomes. We all had one mailbox.

Poor. Poor. I'm trying to think if anyone I knew had a... My grandmother had a mailbox. I grew up in a millionaire's plantation. We had about 100 mailboxes. We had the kind, we had just the kind that were on, you know, the kind that are on the door and they have a lid that opens up. Yeah, I had, what are you, Boston?

We had a green mailbox. Yeah. I had a green mailbox. Was it like a freestanding mailbox? Oh, yeah. That's sick. A movie mailbox. That's what that kind of, that is a movie mailbox.

That is a movie mailbox. That is not a movie mailbox in front of the house normal style with a flag. Yeah. Yeah, I thought the flag was so when I went to my grandmother's social she had when I just play with the flag. I used just put shit in my mailbox. put it down. The mailman has to come get this. We used to do...

Perfect plastic toy on that mailbox. We used to put a rock in the mailbox and put the flag and see if the mailman would take the rock and he never did. You just forgot to put a stamp on it probably. Because it's a rock isn't going anywhere with no stamps. Put a whole ham sandwich in the mailbox. You did? Nope.

We should put firecrackers in the mailbox and then we killed a pregnant lady. Yeah, and then I went back at time and went back to time. We used to put firecrackers in the mailbox and then we killed the pregnant lady? Yep. And then we went back in time. And then I went back in time I tried to stop it. I lost my hands. I watched like the first 20 minutes of that the other day.

And then I was like, oh, I don't know what I don't watch this. Dude, it is an upsetting movie. It's like it's the butterfly effect. Dude, within the first 10 minutes of that movie, he's already getting diddled by Eric Stoltz. Yeah, it's one of those. It's like, it's like that like in 2004 when they're like, we need like, like, we need to make the request the edgiest, the edgiest movie we can make. Yeah.

And they made a time travel movie about like, what if you could go back and stop your molestation. Yeah. And he keeps going back in time and then showing up and he has like no nose and no eyes. Yeah. Oh, I should have just. There's no nose. The moral of the story is like, yeah, probably don't worry about it. It was the best thing that could happen to you.

Being molested is the biggest clunk of all. Yeah. There was another movie that I thought was called the butterfly effect. Maybe you've seen this camera. They like go back in time and they kill one T-Rexam. This is the only thing you can do. They have a time machine where you can go back in time and there's like a tunnel where you're not allowed to touch anything.

The only thing you're allowed to do is kill this one dinosaur. Uh-huh. And then you come back to the present. You're like, yay! And then they're like, but you can't take anything. You can't touch anything. But one guy brings a butterfly. This sounds familiar.

It's not the butterfly effect. Is it an animated movie? It's not called the butterfly effect, but it is a... Is it animated? No, I mean, like, it's live action, but all the side... Maybe this is a prequel. They come back and then... Yeah, there's like a weird...

plot point where they're like, humans were the most recent animal to evolve. So if you change anything in the past, humans will change. So what do they come back to? So they come back to a world where people are like see-through tentacle creatures.

Is it a sound of thunder? Yes. Yeah. It is about... Oh, it's based on a Ray Bradbury story. It is about time tourists, and that's a link on Wikipedia. Okay, that just links to time travel. I hate Wikipedia. I think time travel would be pretty cool. I wouldn't do it.

That's how I was going forward. I would hate to go forward. Actually, I would go back in time, buy, by, like, one thing, and then resell it. I'm going all the way back. I'm not seeing anything that we were up to. I want to see the dinosaurs, maybe the pyramids. Yeah. This movie sounds awesome.

I want to personally see William Shakespeare, but just my... You want to see William Shatner in his prime? You want to see one of his plays, or you just want to see him walking around? I just want to see him. Yeah, I don't know what it looks like. I don't know if he was actually one guy or 13. Do you ever think about, like, like, time travel, doing like a, you, you're, you're, you're You're a time traveler in this scenario.

Actually, I'd probably make a music video. You go. I'd probably film myself doing it and make a music video. I put my fingers in baby Jesus's mouth. I come back, I say, smell this. You go back in time to like, like, 1750 or something. You ever think about, like, what it would smell like? Because I feel like, you're in the middle of, like, the most metropolitan part of 1750.

People are throwing poop out their windows into a, into a truck. It would smell crazy in then. I'd go Germany. All right, yeah. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I'd go to Germany,

Germany like 1928. Germany? Yeah, because that might be the stinkiest place of all. You don't get two in a row. You don't get two in a row. I'd go to Germany 1928 and I'd walk around doing this. I'd be telling me like, this means you're gay.

You walk around with a small mustache just being like, yeah. This represents a, what I do They tried that They tried that with Charlie Chaplin They did And then they do

And then I Charlie Chaplin Tried to Try to turn Hitler's mustache Into into Into mean I get hit by stuff

And then I come back To the president The Holocaust Still happened But all the All the Nazis Are doing this With their hands

Instead of the They're doing the Blood fingers That's so sick That'd be cool Yeah It's like You go back at time

You're like This means you're gay This means you're Cool Yeah I didn't mean to do that second thing I just wanted to show everybody that I wasn't gay

so I did the other thing Not trying to stop the Holocaust Just make the Nazi salute not happy That's the lynch thing It's too hard to do To stop the Holocaust, you know what I mean Oh right because you think it was inevitable Yeah

It's gonna happen no matter what It's either gonna be Hitler I would go back in time I would like I would go back in time I would go back in time and I'd maybe bury a time capsule with a lot of money or something, and then I would get it and I would get all the money. I would bury...

I'd put a whoopee cushion at least. I think I'd bury my Game Boy under the dirt, and then I'd go dig it up in the future. I get to play with it. Yeah, you don't really need time travel for this. Yeah, I'd build a sand castle. I'm going to bury something right now. That actually sounds awesome.

Did you guys ever do a time capsule? Were you ever part of it? I feel like I've, one of them should be opened by now. Yeah. I think people open them and it's the most boring thing ever. Yeah. They put a time capsule into the, uh, there's like a... Because the fun of it is definitely burying it and imagining what it's going to be like,

but then when you're just sitting there. Near the high school. You're like, why did I do this old shit? Yeah, it sucks. In my town, they put a time capsule into like, there's like a little like, you know, like an island like thing at the town, like, just like a grassy area in the middle of the street. And they put, like, there were like benches and stuff there.

And they just put a time capsule in a, middle of that so it's just this giant like metal circle where they like lowered it into the ground and just yeah just everybody would just try to would just try to put like lifted out the ground it's like a crate you can't move it but it's just so funny so you always just see people just be like I want to yeah I want to whip this up yeah it's right there it's not buried it's right here great senior prank yeah lift it up just putting it in a closet I wonder if anyone did it not even opening the time capsule just like oh I took it yeah I would love to just have it to no one else can have it

I would hate to bury my shit in that and be like, oh, fuck, I actually wanted that. Like, what if you're like an idiot kid and you're like, I'll bury my game boy? When you leave a $50 bill in your jacket pocket, that's just a time dollar. Yeah, exactly. And then you open and you're like, oh, fuck. Why I wish I didn't bury this in my pocket? When I was a little part of our, like, porch, like, rodded or something, or like, one of the steps broke, and they were, like, putting in a new porch.

And I made a time capsule that was, like, a jar, and I put one of every coin in it, and I put it under the porch. That'd be worth millions. go get that right now. I know. Well, they just, I think, redid the porch again, like, this year. So I wonder if anyone found it. I think they stole your points. Yeah, without telling me. I mean, I wouldn't tell anyone if I found a time capsule like that.

With money in it? Oh, my God. With coins, you go to the arcade, go fucking crazy. Yeah. Pretty good. Well, it's just one of every, so it's, what, it's, six, 16. How much sense is that? That's, that's 41 cents.

You put, well, that's 41. You put a half dollar in there? No, what are you talking about? What are you talking about? He said one of every coin. You can get a half dollar at any bank. I also put all the Japanese coins and the Chinese coins in the culture of every ancient civilization. You said every coin and a half dollar is still in circulation.

It's okay. So why didn't you bring up a dollar coin? That's more obvious than a half dollar. I feel like a dickhead if I pay with a dollar coin or a half dollar coin. That's my gold coin. That's your gold coin? What are you talking about? That's my gold coin.

That's my nice. No one should have it. As soon as you get a dollar coin, that's your gold coin. You're right. Same with a $2 bill. I get a $2 bill once a year. Oh, I met this flight attendant and he was like,

I always get my, I found this one bank that gives me $2 bills, or like maybe he's specially requests them. And he's like, and I always leave that as a tip, even if it's like way, way less than 15%. Interesting. I guess that is kind of smart

because people do covet those. People like, huh. Yeah. I don't think people really covet those. No, nobody cares. It is, there's an old, there's $2. There's an old lady. who would have come into my job

at the liquor store she would dress all in blue completely blew out every day and she would if whoever was working the register she would just hand them a $2 bill

and I got I would sometimes see her going to a store and I'd go over the register I'd go over the register here and get a $2 dollar bill hello please give me the dollar this is how I talk

you do his you do an old person that's not how I talk I didn't talk like that I didn't say anything I'm Cameron and I want to I'm not Cameron

Cameron already got his $2. I'm new Cameron. I'm with a new voice. I'm wearing a new hair now. I'm forgetting

what a disguise is for you. I'm new Cameron with a new voice. New camera with a new voice and look at this. I just moved my hair

to the other side. You point out exactly. Watch this. Now I'm a different Cameron. Hello. I don't think

that would work on this lady. She seems pretty wise if she's getting $2 bills. She's not wise. She's blue. She's truly blue. She's the bluest woman I've ever seen.

She was one of the bluest women I ever saw. She's a blue bitch. Cortana is a sexy blue bitch. I would like to get a, have a kind of one, every single day where the same color all the way down. Yeah. I do respect people when I see that. Yeah.

Black is like every, you can do that. Nobody really notices. That's fine. If you do like, like all red, yellow. I saw a dude who had a, he had a fitted, a Philly's fitted hat. Philly's fitted hat that was the exact same color as his sweatshirt. Whoa. And it was like a, like a, no matching pants though?

No. That doesn't count. The pants were shorts, but it was like a sand brown. But they weren't the same color. It has to be all the same color. Yeah. A guy's hat matched his shirt. It was the exact same color.

What, who cares? What do you mean, dude? It was the exact the same. Well, look, these are, these are the same. color. You notice this? But these are short. Oh, wait, these are shorts, so it doesn't count.

They're shorts, not pants. The pants were shorts. Yeah. Yeah. All one color, all one color when it's not like, like, you know, like, I feel like it doesn't count. And it's like, if someone's like, like, we're, okay, I get it. You really do have to go outside and start banging garbage cameras.

Hamlets together. Everybody, my friend, is matching. It doesn't count if it's all, like, all one color because they're wearing, like, a track suit or something. It has to be different clothes that are the same color. Like, jeans that are the same color as your sweatshirt. Yeah, if your jeans are the same color as your shirt. Here's your sign. Here's your sign.

Most matching. Matcher. You might be a matcher. You might be a matcher if your shoes. If your hat, shoes, shirt pants, socks. And your pants. If your hat, gloves, shoes, shirt, pants, socks, and sweatshirt are all the same color. You might be a matcher.

If your socks take as long to put on as your pants, you're a longer. You're a long sucker. He's trying to cash in on the you might be a redneck thing. He's like, I have to like, yeah, I have to diversify this. I have to spread out. People don't really say redneck anymore. If your gene pool has jeans in it, you might be a jeaner. Yeah, he's trying to hit his broad and audience as possible.

Are you smarter than a longer? If you walk outside, you might be an outside walker. You might be an outsider. Yeah. If your house is a little old. is a shoe, you might be a little old lady. If you sit on your tuftet to eat your cards and weigh.

Here he goes. Now it starts to re-rimes. Now he just completely changes the entire rules right in front of our face. Yeah, it should be like this. If you live in a shoe, you might be a shoer. That's what we should have said. Who sits on their tough?

Your ass is always on your damn tough. Get off of it. There's no way you forgot. It rhymes. You remember Tuftit and not Little Miss Mufford? That is fucking insane. I didn't remember. If you have a neck that is red in color, you might be a neck redder.

A neck redder? Okay. This I feel like maybe doesn't really, but it segues into the list for today. Top ten things to say when using the phrase, there's two types of people in the world. There's two types of people in the world. There's red necks and neck redder. There's rednecks. and mattresses and shoeers and lawsockers.

There's 100 tons of people. There's a few types of people in the world. There's jumpers and singers. And Little Miss Buffet. If you jump around everything, you might be a jumper. But if you sing, you might be a singer jumper. Who's to say you can't be both?

You might be a singer dancer. Chris Brown's singer dancer. Oh, yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yep. You might be a brown neck. If you get tanned on your neck and it doesn't burn, you might be a brown neck.

Yep. Yep. All right. Number one is people that can respect opinions and ones who argue about them. Yeah. I can respect differences in opinions. And I can't and I actually argue about them. So.

I love to see a debate. he's just respecting my opinion you laughed at it like you were attacking him you like laid in and opened your mouth like you charging a breath weapon I thought he's going to take a bite out of me you you you're a you hoover you might be a youer I just have the I really do have the stupidest sense of humor ever I just like, if you just say the two things

I save them one and you see the other I laugh so hard because we completed the thing it's like we did it and it's like we did it it's like we did it it's like we were two people

it's so much fun I can't wait to do this with all of the things. There's two for everyone. Oh, wait, there's four of us. Well, you guys can get the next one. You should see how good it'd be. You'll have to. What's the next one?

The next one is, ones who make yo mama jokes and ones who makes memes. Well, I makes memes. I'm too, make your mama jokes. Well, you guys, you got to flubbed them. Yeah, I feel like me. and Pierce really had it on lock there. You guys kind of...

You guys try this one then. See, I think it's this one's problem. I don't think it's us. Well, how I would do it... Mama jokes and makes memes? Here, here. So how I would do it is like, like, yo mama

so fat, she went out onto the beach and all the whales, they jumped out of the water. And they started saying, we are family, even though you're fatter than me. Yeah. Me when I don't care. See?

Okay. see I don't know that was pretty you guys are holding back tears it's good but it wasn't as good as the first one yeah there's nothing nothing will ever be as good as the first one well maybe yeah well maybe it would maybe perfect as if

the content of it was pretty funny yeah I feel like so maybe Caleb says that joke and then Pierce like holds up his phone and he's created a new meme that's called like like joke that is not true Caleb and it's like Caleb's face with a bunch of colors behind it and it says, like, tells joke that is not true. Yeah, as usual.

That's important. That's the most. Every meme. Every meme. I have to say as usual at the bottom. Every being typically awkward penguin could just be doing one socially awkward thing. And then at the bottom as usual. When the ticket taker says enjoy your movie, I say, as you too.

As usual. I think we are new, I think we have a new kind of way to do this, which is we should just not read the actual thing and just give it to them in the format of like who we are. Okay. Yeah. So personally, I really like dogs. I would kill a dog.

On the other hand. This one I think is maybe there's, there might, this might be more than two types of people. I feel like there might be some middle ground between this one. No, there's not. I think you like dogs right up to the point where you would kill one. Because I would kill a dog. I I like dogs, but I would.

Well, you said, well, okay, so then that's, that you just have disproved. It means there's not two types of people. I guess there's only one type. It's one type of person. Everyone is someone who likes dogs until they have to kill them. Well, everyone, yeah, if it's just you like dogs or you, and you don't like dogs, you don't like dogs unless they're attacking you. Yeah, I don't think you have to, you don't have to hate dogs to kill one. No.

You know what I mean? No. I would kill a dog that was a cat. Not mutually exclusive. Yeah. Yeah, if a dog bit my wiener, I'd kill it. Does anybody else, Instantly think of Michael Vick when reading this.

Well, he's the ultimate middleman. Here's another comment. Right now I'm thinking, right now I'm thinking of what they do in Iran. They kill dogs by injection of acid. Like, when they like strap up to a chair? Dog-shaped vial of acid. It's like the dogs playing poker, but they're all in electric chairs. That's really good, yeah.

Well, here, there's this comment section is filled with people trying to do your kind of like two-person routine, where there's a bunch of people who say, and I'm the one who likes dogs. I love dogs. I like dogs. But no one's replying to finish it. Right. I like dogs.

Pug will not be pleased. In Thieves of Ostia, there's a man who hates dogs because one killed his daughter. That's probably true. Yeah. What about this number six one? Do you want to try this one, Caleb?

Number six? Yeah. I'm the kind of person who just hates Nikki Minaj. And personally, I live in a mental hospital. But I do No opinion on Nicki Minaj But I do live in a mental hospital

I guess I don't hate her I've never heard of her All I hear is Yeah This one I don't know Hey I love Nicky Manage And I'm not in the mental hospital Well that person

Well that's because they're talking about Nicky Manage Not Nicky Minaj is a different person I hate both of them okay that's number seven I hate both of them okay so that's not

yeah that doesn't hmm this option made me laugh definitely using this one in real life I've been to mental hospitals before

damn oh my god get over anaconda there's turn me on and Marilyn Monroe you guys seriously can't give someone a chance okay so here

so I don't know whoever wants to take this but I mean I'm just I'm the type of person I play feature FIFA. I do yoga. You are one who do yoga? I am one who do yoga.

He fucked it up. You are one who do yoga? Oh, you are one who do yoga? I've been waiting to meet one who do yoga. And here's, well, here's the, from the commenter, from the commenter Puga explains why this is, this is a difference here. FIFA is much more interesting and unpredictable. Yoga is neither of those things. Right.

Right. Yeah. Well, yoga could be unpredictable if you just do a surprise. yoga moves. In the world of FIFA players, there's literally just one yogi. For every one FIFA player, there's one yoga player. Do you play yoga? Yeah. Can you win or lose? Well, it's the same as like, it's the same. So when you do yoga, like, and you're just kind of doing it by yourself, that's like, that's like doing like time trial, but like on a sonic

level or something. Yeah. True. All right here, I'll try this one out. This is number 17. Number 16 is good too, but we'll do number 17. I'm an atheist, plain and simple. I'm one who goes on about it. I guess there's a... Yeah, sure. Or this whole episode is just going to be us. It's just us chasing the high of the first one,

getting really upset when none of them work. I thought that the... Go on about it would be like, personally, I got to... I think there was a godman. No, but he... Okay, what about this? But he's talking... Okay, so do it again.

Here. But they're both atheists here. That's right. I'm an atheist, and that should tell you everything you need to know. I'm an atheist, and I'm an atheist, and I'm an atheist, and I'm an atheist, and I'm an atheist, and I'm an atheist. And I'm an atheist. Yeah. Oh, wait, here's one, number 19.

I'm somebody who actually loves video games. I'm a cancerous five-year-old. Who loves video games more than a five-year-old with cancer? Yeah, that's all that's true. They stuff in that fucking bed. They make fucking $1,000. They make millions of dollars from charities on Twitch. Yeah.

Here's number 21. Okay. This one's more visual. Yeah. Okay. Well, you have to say it because there's no, it's not visual. Yeah. You should have said, I'm Harry, and then I would have said, I'm the guy he's sitting next to.

All right. Yeah. I'm smart. Duh. Hey, here's one. Yeah. There you go. The two types of guys.

I'm an actual respectable Christian. Personally, I hate you. That's not what it says. I use the Bible is an excuse to hate. Yeah. Oh, fuck, dude. You guys have really lost it. I did the best one ever, okay?

So I can, I'm like Michael Jordan on the Wizards. I'm just kind of having, I'm having fun. No, this is, no. You're not late career. This is still the first. We already did this. This is still the. Why do you think that we would not do the bald one?

I guess I thought maybe you would wait for me to get back. This is still the first- Who's hairier, I get? Probably him, actually. Yeah, I might be hairier than Pierce. Not on your head. Well, it's just a matter of time. Hmm.

I think we have the same length hair. What are you fucking talking about? What? I think my hair is the same length as Pierce. No, wrong. I'm just wearing a hat. Yeah, and I'm not. I'm a leader.

I'm a leader. Isn't it so awesome? It's fun. Patrick gets it. I'm a leaders. I'm a leaders. Yeah, well, I'm a teabger. That's not it.

That's not it. Yeah, we should start mixing them. That's a good idea. That could maybe, okay. Hey, Cameron, Cameron, I care about the Holocaust, and I hate it. And I am Cameron. Well, that tells you all you need to know. Yeah.

I think I've met this type of guy before. Knowing what I know about Caleb, I can appreciate him. You can understand what he means. I grind. I'm an omnivore. Let's just say things that we are. We don't need this list.

I'm cool. Well, I don't eat. I'm right-handed. I don't eat pista crust. Pista. I'm a descended from set. Pista. Pista?

Pista. Type of Caleb He just said that I am a girl I eat pizza crust I eat pizza crust No I don't eat it

You fucking asshole I'm a person Who has a breakfast in the kitchen I have it in bed I'm I'm Wait I'm the

I'm the one For 77 Oh you went far down 77 I'm the one that like Justin Bieber. I'm dead. I have cancer.

I'm a Nazi and a girl. I'm rich. And I'm the one who is trashy. Okay, here's one. I get excited when Christmas decorations appear on the streets. I suck.

That's not. No, you're people who aren't. I spread ketchup all over the fries. I put it beside them. I love Scarlett Johansson. I hate Scarlet Johansson. I love it. I love her.

I love Scarlet Johans. I'm the ones who watches cartoons. I'm ones who watch live actions. Both, but probably cartoons. I'm girls. I'm good noodles. I'm bad eggs. What's that mean, dude?

heard somebody say they were a good noodle. No, I haven't either. Bad egg I heard. I heard a good egg more than... Yeah, nobody's heard a good noodle. I adhere to the golden rule. And I don't. I'm annoying popular girls.

I'm a teabger. I'm a prostitute. We got them. Yep. The whole list. Just sting off. What is it? Does this...

He thinks that you get a prostituting tea bag to prostit? A prostitute a teabger? You can. You can t-bag a prostitute. No, we're tea bags, man. You don't... Speak for yourself. I mean, expects for...

Hey, buddy, you haven't lived. Except for Master Chief, maybe, when he kills a couple of alien freaks. Yeah. But you don't t-bag a prostitute. You're not paying good money to t-bag. Well, you tee-bag your wife. I think you're only allowed to t-bag someone who's dead. Yeah, you have to kill the prostitutes.

I feel like a lot of people kill prostitutes. That's like, that's one of the things that people do to them. I've never heard of that. There's those who kill prostitutes. And those who don't tee-bag prostitutes. There's ones who don't not do not teabag. And those who do tea bag do teabag. This is the opening statement of the defense.

I'm a person who grinds. I said that one already. Oh, you did? Yeah. And I grind in my sleeve. I twerk. Oh. No, twerk.

That's the one. Okay. Get up and show me your jiggling ass. All right. I'm not going to do it. You put your coffee down like you're going to do it. I'm not going to do it. That's like me putting my foot down.

This is my foot. Put that ass down. Coffee is my foot. Put your ass down to the ground and lift it back up. This coffee is my foot. How do women move their asses like that? It's their back. It's their lower back.

It's a trick. They're tricking us as usual. It's like this. It's the rubber pencil trick. Look, it's elastic. That's actually their stomach that you see from the side and it looks like their butt moving around. It's actually, that's actually, that's actually, that's actually, they're moving the

entire world and your eyes. That's actually just air moving. It's shimmering air. It's like a heat wave. It's like a mirage. What's happening is they make a super hot fart that makes the air shimmer. Oh, that makes sense.

Those are stink lines moving on the inside. Your eye confuses sink lines for the vibration like curve lines. You ever seen a fart while twerking? I can, what do you mean see it? Like you imagine? Like somebody farts while they're twerking. You see the butt move and it goes like...

It makes a fart sound? Oh, yeah, I have seen that actually. I feel like hearing that is the more interesting. Yeah. Well, you can see the fart. Is it weird that I like the way you did that? There are two kinds of people. Try another list.

I think we went on this one. I'm one who takes selfies. Yeah, you actually are. Well, here's one. Yeah, fuck you. I'm a descendant of Seth. I'm a descendant of Cain. Seth?

Yeah. Seth was the third one. It was Abel, Cain, Seth. Seth was the third child. We didn't hear about Seth. What? When I was grown up. Well, you should have.

I mean, you guys probably stupid. What a stupid third guy's name. I know. It's pretty funny. You probably guys probably couldn't count above two. I could. Yeah. Like, you heard Seth and it just didn't go into your memory.

This one, the top ten best places to poop. Have we done that one? I don't know. I think we have. I don't think so. I think we could do this one. I'm a good Samaritan. I'm in a toilet.

That's the wrong list. I'm a good Samaritan. I'm Chinese. I've played Cave Story. I bite into chocolate and people who eat it in pieces. I'm the ones that like hyenas and the ones that like lions. Wait. Hyannism, like lions, and you, twerk.

Can we do this top ten best places to poop one? Sure. Did we not do? I feel like we did. All right, let me let's do this look at it. Hold up. I feel like, I don't know. Who knows?

It doesn't matter. It actually doesn't matter whether we did it or not. And I think it does. Damn. I mean, this is similar to all the other ones. You might be a thinker that it does her. What about, what about, can we just do the top? top ten most disgusting things that people can do.

Yeah. Okay. This one's got to great. So go ahead and read this one. Okay, this is the top ten things people can do that are extremely disgusting. Number one is rape. Solo potato says, holy crap, this is so bad. It's 100 times on this list.

Which cruel, disgusting person would even think about this? Yeah. So that's the type of person I am. And Pierce, who are you? One thumbs up equals one prayer for the people who have had to go through this. Yeah, there are two kinds of people in this world who go through this. You have two thumbs. You're only using one of them to give a prayer.

That's right. Yeah, why not just give? Number two, eat other people. Yeah, that's not good. That's pretty gross. Seriously, people are already doing this. In China, they're selling baby soup. Can you believe how unhuman that is?

Honestly, eating babies is really gross. People like this deserve to be thrown into jail. They don't do that in China, and I would know. That is a myth by people who hate China. They did eat some in Hawaii a few centuries ago. And these are the two types of people. I know, this is disgusting. There's a bunch of comments about baby soup.

No, this is just plain horrible. People's in China are just weird for drinking baby soup. Yeah, people don't know what adjective to describe eating baby. It's nasty. Are they referring to that artist who did that thing where he ate a fake baby? I don't know what you're talking about. I don't remember that. It's a pretty cool looking.

He made it look mad real. Only cannibals and some survivors with no food do that. Only cannibals eat people. Do you guys think you eat somebody? Cannibals and some survivors. What's the point of eating people when you have other meats? That's a good point. Yeah.

I think, I always think about, like, I feel like every time you hear about, like, people cannibalizing somebody, they always die, like, one day later. It's like, when did you just fucking chill for one day instead of, like, eating your friend's leg? But it doesn't work. It almost never works out. It's like a final. No, but that's absolutely, that's your chance. No, that's not.

That's not your chance to survive. That's your chance to eat a person. Yeah. That's what you could eat a person and re-assimilated into society. I was reading this thing where like some like serial killer guy killed a bunch of people and then like baked, put them into foods, I forget what kind of food, some kind of meat food. Hot dog. And he gave them to people at like the like town fair or whatever.

So it was just a whole town and just like eight people and didn't know about it. And you imagine finding out about that after the fact. Well, there's that dark water movie that. It's based off of the, or no, dark water came first, and then Elisa Lamb or whatever, the woman who was found on the water tank. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. People were drinking her body water. Yeah, I just in fact, her body water? Yeah, but that's what I mean is like, imagine, imagine finding out,

imagine finding out you were drinking a girl's water or eating a guy's meat, and you didn't even, you didn't know about it, and you don't get to enjoy it or be disgusted. But it's like, well, like, if I found out I ate a guy's pie or whatever that was had a guy that had a guy that had a guy guy's water and guys pie. And I was like, I feel like I wouldn't even be able to be disgusted because it already happened. Like, it's not like, it's like if you ate a hot dog and you found out a year later that was like a rotten hot dog, you wouldn't be, yeah, I'd be like, yeah, it's behind me. I'm living in the, I'm looking in the, I'm looking for my next food. Yeah, exactly. I'm not going to throw up. It's not still in me. It's in the toilet. It's making why it's guy water now. Yeah, exactly. It's guy water for rats. Which we never thought it'd even happen. and we made guy water. Well, guy water is when guy pie goes through a boy's system. The boy system turns pie to water. Guys water can only be made after it goes through boy's system. Yeah. That's the two types.

Yeah. Boy's systems and guys water. I just don't, I don't, I don't, I would not, I don't think even if I had the chance that I would want to eat somebody. No. Unless I really hated them. Unless I really wanted to. Yeah. Unless I was like really hungry.

Unless I didn't know that. I was doing it. Yeah. Well, that's it. Unless I was being mind control. That's like every...

I would never do it unless someone made me without my knowledge. That was another, that's another really good hypothetical question to annoy a girlfriend with is like, would you,

would you kill me or would you eat me if you had to and there was no other option and you were being controlled to do? That's what I asked her the other day and she was like, no, I don't think I could. And I said,

I would eat you have to. And she was like, what? I would eat you pretty much instantly. Would you eat human flesh if you had to? Yeah. Would you cut off my head?

Yeah, there's no other option. That's what I would ask. Sure. Yeah, people get people's, and then they say yes. Right. And you're like, what's wrong with you? Right. You're supposed to say no.

Yeah. It's supposed to resist. Another good follow up if, you know, would you cut off my head and eat my nuts? And they say no. You just say, okay, would someone? Would someone do that? Would someone do that? Because if someone could, they could.

Yeah. Yeah. Are you possible? Would someone do that? Are you someone? Interesting. Oh, you're not anybody? Interesting.

You ever had like TREPA? Or like, yeah, TRIPA. Trapa. Yeah. You know how, like, when you bite into it, it's kind of got that, like, mealy, little, like. Is that tripe? I thought it was tripe. TRIPA is like, um, TRIPA is like, um, TRIPA is like, um, TRIPA is what the

is the fuck is tree? I thought tribe was intestine. Yeah, I don't know. I think TRI is it, is it spelled T-R-I-E? Is it pronounced T-R-A? Oh, okay. That's probably the Spanish word for, you think, well, I'm thinking. If, like, I've had, I've had a few treat but tacos in my day.

I imagine that biting into that, like, if you cooked somebody's balls, it would taste exactly like that. Yeah. That, whenever on Fear Factor, they eat the ball nuts, I'm always like, I'm not like crazy. Yeah. The ball nuts. The ball nuts. Bull, bowl nuts. Yeah.

Well, it's... Would you eat a bull's nuts if it was in a taco show? I guess I would. Would you eat a bull's nuts if you put his nuts in your face? You couldn't move and pinned you down. You were really hot. You were really hungry. You were starving for three days.

Oh, you only needed one bite to live? Yeah, I'd probably do that. Well, if, you know what they call, they say that, like... It tastes like candy. They say that, like, human tastes like pork or whatever. Yeah. And they call it the long pig. I feel like...

Pigs are already long as hell. It is long as hell. It's probably longer than a human. I mean, but, yeah. Well, I mean... Humans tall. It should be the tall and not long pig. The tall and thin pig.

But what I would say is, I feel like I would be... I feel like that was a good move because I would be a lot more likely to eat human or to try to kill and eat a human if it was called like the tasty pig or the yummy delicious pig. The walking talking pig. Yeah.

I feel like they could have done one better and called it gross pig though. Yeah. Or just not even pig. Just call it pig. You don't call it pig. Yeah, people are going to think they're eating. Poot meat.

Pig, yeah. Boot meat. Yeah. You could, you could, you know, you could pretty easily accidentally order a long pig at a restaurant. I mean, say somebody asks you, how long is the line and you say long?

And then you also turn back to order and you say pig. Because you want the pig You got pig on the menu Yeah, you're ordering pig But you're answering someone else's question You say, long, pig Right Here you are eating your cousin

Yeah, well I heard that a restaurant In New York City actually Um, did you see this news clip That they're actually serving human flesh Actually are you right Yeah, and if you don't like that You should steer clear Yeah

At the restaurant, that's what they said Yeah And if you, even if you don't like it Sometimes you will be made to eat it In certain situations where you have to. Well, they say about that restaurant is that like a nut in a candy factory,

it's going to be in everything. All their tools, all their machines, they cover it, they put... Well, when they bring you the food... When they bring you the food to the restaurant, they say, would you eat this if you had to? If we had nothing else on the menu right now...

Except this human meat, would you eat it? And they say... And you can't eat. The trick is, they show you that before they show. you the menu so as soon as you get the menu and like if you say no you get the menu everything is crossed out yeah yeah so that yeah what they say is there are one type of people who would eat this if they had to yeah right who are you I'm an eater I guess I'm an eater I guess I'm a eater

that I guess you might be that I watched that's that comedy special early today I think I think back and I think about all that stuff he said you might be an eater humaner He just says, you are a human eater. You are a human eater. There's no if anymore. You are an eater. You are a breather. Number three is pick up poop and eat it.

And someone says, I heard that this can kill you. Still, it's very disgusting. So it can kill you, but it's still disgusting. It's been in somebody's body. It might have been in Donald Trump's body. Ew. I would eat that. I would eat Donald Trump shit.

I would eat Donald Trump's poop. I'll tell you a quicker than Hillary. Come on. Like, I mean, come on. I would eat his shit before I ate her box. Mm-hmm. Yeah. His shit would taste better than her pussy.

Yeah. And that's on God. And I love pussy. I love Hillary Clinton. And I hate shit. But let's be real and objective about this. His literal shit would taste better than her puss. Yeah.

And it's not even that it would taste better. It's just that I want to do it more. I would rather do that and fucking lick her snatch. So look, I tell someone at a party, it's not even about the taste, yeah. Yeah, I tell someone at a party, I ate out Hillary Clinton. They would say, who cares? Yeah, so did every fucking Boy Scout in America. Right, but I swallowed Trump's log using a fork and knife.

Suddenly, people are hoisting me. Then they don't know what you mean by log, because it could mean his thing. Yeah, his white thing. His white thing. First of all, probably be an orange thing. I mean, that's a white thing. What's up? Yeah, huh?

Second of all, if somebody said that they ate somebody's log, I don't know that I think I would know it was poop. I don't know. Do you think you'd get a tapeworm from eating his shit? I don't know. I've heard people call that thing. No, there's no way he has a tapeworm. You know he keep it clean.

Yeah. I mean, he probably eats enough damn hamburgers from McDonald's and Cofafia. It kills any damn parasite that could possibly exist in his gut. And he probably eats Diet Coke and he poops a whole hamburger. Yeah. And look, I don't like the guy. I sometimes think that he himself is a worm on the country in the house. Made of tape.

He almost reminds me of a worm. Red tape. Yeah. A pea tape. Oh, my God. Orange tape. A yellow tape. Green tape.

He's a peat worm. Green worm. Red worm. Yeah, he's a red worm. He's a pea tape worm. He's a pea tape worm who eats hamburgers and drinks diet Coke. And he's still, and he hates it, but he'll still drink that crap. Crap?

What? He's eating crap, like a tapeworm. Yep. Uh-huh. Yep. Eat my crap. Yeah, your crap. I would love to feed him my craps.

Yeah. Yeah, little tiny pieces. All right, go to swag poop.com slash shows for tickets to the show. And Pierce will be opening for the show. Some of them. Then I have to leave. Then he has to go. He's going to, okay.

And he has to go home. And we all have to go for the show. Meow.