Podcast About List - Ep. 193 - Peetrick (w. Home Planet)

Episode Date: May 11, 2022

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Come in, come in, come in, and we see a butt. All the counts to the ball list. Every crap monster. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Top 10 proof.

Do you start now? What? What? I'm sorry, I had the list of them. No. No, I don't even have it. This one got three likes. This one got three of them.

In glorious bastards. I got three likes on this one. Boring to the maximum. serious news fest i didn't last 30 seconds in the theater before falling asleep i slept for the entire movie and i didn't even get to see the parts with hitler one star that's good that's funny and that's your honest opinion i would give that a like yep is that your own inception half one half star a movie about being asleep i fell asleep in this movie four likes yeah the problem with letterbox about if you try to do anything like that people on there are so stupid yeah dude yeah

I got that one review about Come and See Where I was like I'm going to join the Army To stop this wherever happening again And literally I had to turn off the comments on it Because I got like a hundred comments They're like you are the worst person on the earth You seriously want to join the army

This one got deleted and put back on This was one star for Rocket Man And I said, snooest Four hours of a gay guy playing piano I literally fell asleep in the middle of the movie Uncut Jims one star so fucking boring i literally fell asleep with my blanket and my friend had to wake me up apparently i was drooling all over my face i didn't i keep going with that was fun film lover seven

check me out yeah that's pretty good i do fall asleep in movies a lot yeah dad move in the theaters i'll pay 20 dollars to see a movie i'll get popcorn i'll get rice's pieces it's easy to fall asleep in a theater it's the most comfy it's the best sleep i ever get it's really night I get like full rim sleep. When you accept that you don't want to watch whatever movie you're watching and you just want to sleep. Yeah. Yeah. Most restful sleep.

I took, I had a really good sleep during no time to die. Nice. And then there's a big explosion woke me up. Brought me right back into it. Whoa. That's it. You just unlocked a new way to like punctuate sentences with a chip crunch. That was really good.

Do it again. Dude, please say something awesome and then crunch a chip. Something awesome like. I woke up this morning and I I took a shower Oh my It really sells it I can't imagine that's like you

Did you eat a chip in the shower or no No, but he's eating them chips now Damn That's what counts I know, that's right I cleaned up for last time I cleaned our shower this morning Yeah

No, last night I cleaned it Okay I know I clean my body I'm a shower That's right You guys use your body To clean your shower

I use my shower to clean my body Yeah Sometimes I use my body To clean my body And my shower to clean my shower Do you guys use a lufa a rag or your hand I'm a hand man

whoa I'm a hand man never in my life have I used a lufa no yeah I'm not a lufa guy I would I say most usually hand sometimes a washcloth I'm a washcloth man your hands though because you're kind of

it's nice to use a washcloth will get dirty yeah you clean it you don't like use it over and over I don't really want to be shoving a washcloth on my butt hole though that's like how you get your ass clean though no because you if you you can This guy, this guy knows.

I didn't realize it until it's cut somewhat recently, but you can put soap in your butt hole as long as it doesn't go too full. You stick a finger in your butt. But it's about the abrasion because a piece of soap, if soap touches shit, it doesn't just make it disappear. It doesn't it eliminates it. It just covers it with soap. Well, you're still, you have to, you have to use.

I'm not going to go all the way. No, if you touch soap on something dirty, it goes. You do put the wash cloth in your ass. In your hole? A little bit. But then it doesn't that gross you out when you? use it on your face? Are you like this was in my pub before? I don't use my washcloth on my face.

Like when you shave? When I shave. No, I have a different rag for that. It's different. Different. I use a two rag system. How many washcloths do you have? Fifteen, sixteen. One for every part of my body. Color coordinated. Brown for my butt. White for my face. What I do. Your butt is confused all the time. We're like, wait a second.

Wait, do I have a brown face and a white ass? I can't remember. Oh, God. Or did I do it opposites on purpose? Is that my system? I like, you just have... Your butt is like a black man's butt. I have a pitch black butt. You got a nice booty. I have a shining African butt.

And the rest of my body is pink. It did take... Until I think I was like 19 or 20 when I first realized... Like, it wasn't like methodical, but I realized that I would... Like, most times that I took a shower, I washed my butt and then I washed my hair afterwards.

Yeah. Hair is better than fit. Well, I guess it drips. Well, it's just... I was just like, I'm probably putting shit. It's still like... It's still not good either way. But, like, you're not, that's so far removed.

Nobody's going to be, like, smelling your hair later and be like, there's poop in your hair. It's not, it's not, yeah, it's not, like, that you are physically going to have poop in your hair. It's just a gross thing. It's the gross, it's the same grossness of, like, if you, like, just clean the floor and then you, like, drop, like, something that you were eating onto the floor. Where it's, like, technically, it's not. It brings it to a whole different. No, it's just, yeah, it's like a, it's like a, it's like a Victorian miasma thing. Where it's like this has this like

It's like just logical It's like yeah It's like if you walk into the bathroom And it smells like poop You're gonna feel disgustin You're gonna feel like you're covered in poop Well I do feel like the poop Like what am I smelling

I'm definitely getting poop particles into my house Yeah well okay so poop can stay in the air for hours But it can't go in your hair on your hand in 10 seconds No no I'm agreeing with you I'm starting to understand your point It's like a shower feel similar Oh I hate that When you had a wet butt hole

Yeah it's like I've just cleaned every single part of And then there's like no, you can't wipe it. So you just got to leave it in there. Hold on. Sorry, I have to record something at like three. You just remembered? Yeah. What time is it?

It's like 2.45. We're not going to get like the whole episode done. We can do an hour episode in 13 minutes. Yeah. Yeah, that's fine. I'm going to pause. What's so funny about the timer? Nothing.

Sorry. How else will you know what time, how long, We've been recording. Math is funny to me because I'm such a literature guy. Nope. Yeah, because you're such a dope. He's doing the thing too, the fucking... What thing?

The thing that I do. Every time there's a noise upstairs. Yeah, I mean, I'll... You got to look up, but you don't have to go, wait. What was that? Do you freak out with the noise? He always is like, we'll be talking about something in recording, and he'll hear a noise upstairs, and he'll go, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I feel like it's the same thing

when like when you're on the train and like someone's acting crazy and the person across he was like I don't care let me alone I love the crazy one

I love doing that have you guys seen the videos where like somebody gets in a fight on the train or something and it's Mike Tyson got in the fight on the plane like yesterday

what? Oh I saw that just now there was a guy who was like a drunk guy was annoying Mike Tyson on a plane I think yesterday and then

there's a video of him I saw a picture of it just, like, being really annoying and whatever. Instead, he bloodied him in the headline. Really? There's a video from behind that guy. I'm just Mike Tyson going, like... Whoa.

Dude, he was punching him? Yeah, and he's, like, bloody. He should see, like, Mike Tyson is like... It looks like he's in, like, coach. No, it's first class, for sure. It's, like, a booth thing. It's like... Oh, okay.

I think this was a restaurant. Maybe I saw a different video. I think this was Applebee's. Mike Tyson is, like, a very interesting guy to me. Because he's, like, actually a fucking lunatic. Yeah. And he, like, tossing. all the time about like there was a guy that he was uh he like the guy taught him how to box

basically told him like you are going to become a super weapon with no conscience and he was like 15 he was like okay and he just did that and then he had like kids and shit and he was like oh wait i i need to like i can't just punch stuff all the time right and then he became and now he's trying to get back into boxing again yeah and you know what and he's only 23 years old He could be 60 years old, I don't know. I think he's 65, would be my guess. He's rich, too. Yeah.

I think being a living weapon is one of the coolest things ever. Yeah. It's like really awesome. Like a talking gun, something like that. Yeah. His living weapon and also having like a 10-year stint on adult swim is like... Yeah, and he was like good friends with like Norm McDonald. I need it.

Punch someone in the face. It says here he appeared at San Francisco's 420 Cannabis Festival. Whoa. That's awesome. So he smokes weed, too? really need a celebrity who has swords for arms, like, like grafted on blades on his

forearms. Like Maraca? Yeah, exactly. Like Baraka, but no hands. Just, just slanders. This happened after the 420 festival. He was just fucking all hopped up on weed. It makes him violent as hell out. Yeah. This is going to come out in like three weeks. Yeah,

so he'll probably do it again. Okay. So, yeah, he did this at the 520 festival. Like Tyson. He did this on a single to Mayo. 20, everybody. Here's a headline from November 2021. Okay. So I'm going even farther in the past.

Mike Tyson used sex to keep himself from committing murder. Mike Tyson said earlier this week that he died from psychedelic toad venom. Dude, he's awesome. He went on Jake Paul's podcast and he ate like a heroic dose of mushrooms at the beginning of it. Your big Jake Paul podcast. No, a big Mike Tyson. Clip on Podcasts guy. I've seen all...

There's another clip. I need a guy who acts like this, but he has like a cannon. Yeah. He has like a robot cannon. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. There's a clip where Joe Rogan talks about

how the reason... He made his table bigger on his podcast, like a bigger space between him and the other guest, because he had Mike Tyson on, he was really scared of him. And he was like, I have to get a new table. It's so cool, dude. Yeah.

I would get a smaller table. If it was Mike Tyson on. Yeah, I'd get one of the tables they put in the middle of the pizza. Yeah, it would be like a pranks. You know what those are for? I'd say, I'd say, oh, box. You hold it down and then you slide the pizza out. No, it's not.

What? Slide what pizza out? You hold it, you hold it down onto one end of the slice. You like flip it like that and then pull. That may be true, but that's one of the things that, that, you know, you'll see, like somebody posted a TikTok video of it. It's like, this is actually what it's for. It's like, I don't believe you.

Yeah. You made that up. I don't care if that's what it was. it's for stacking when you stack like 10 pizzas on top of each other so it doesn't cave in yeah that makes more sense it could be multi-person you guys know what bottle caps are secretly for what keeping in drinking look at this okay so therefore falling out okay yeah could I see it did you just turn off your mic did I just turn the switch on no no no you just turn it off this episode's going amazing this is the best episode ever this is the best episode we've

What's going on? Can you hear me? No, what the fuck? All right, let's just abandon ship. Lost episode. Hello, hello. Can you hear this? Yeah, I can hear you eating now.

It only works when he eats. I guess. Just don't miss with the switch. I'm just leave the switch on. Can you hold that for me? I am not holding that for you. Do you guys ever, we were talking about showers. Do you guys ever take baths?

No. I didn't take a bath in a long time. We just got a place that, well, actually, you guys had a tub the whole time. disgusting I'm too big for bats in general I need like a king size tub if I want to fit me too it's not fun it's also not like

I need like a like a nine foot deep 11 foot long tub that's a pool that's a damn pool that's a pool you idiot 11 feet long seems too long no

it's probably too sure if anything 11 11 by 11 I want an 8.5 by 11 inch tub. That is not going to fit. That's going to fit my papers, though, perfectly. When you need to get them wet. You need an even soak on all pages. When you're doing a temporary tattoo, you're going to get wet.

It's be perfect. Or like a rice paper, make a spring roll. Do you bubble bath in there? I haven't done bubble bath in a minute. But I take baths pretty often, but I might have to have to add bubbles. You should be able to put the bubble bath stuff into the shower head, and it, puts bubbles out and you can take a bubble shower. Oh.

I like sitting in my nasty trash. In one way? I just feel like you're going to mess with your drain. Okay, well, clearly, I'm not going to just put stuff. It would be a product that someone designed to do that. So you're putting a bubble bag on? When I come up with an imaginary product, it's not like you're just like, you don't just be like, well, it wouldn't work.

Well, no, in my brain, they're developing one that would work that way. Obviously, I know if you put bubble bath stuff in your shower head, it's not going to work. I wasn't looking inside your brain. I'm sorry. No, what you're doing is you're trying to pick me apart and you're trying to tear me down. I'm just thinking practical. I want to take a bubble shower. You're not thinking practically.

If you make it like a cap. You made it a cap on top of the shower. That's not my job. That's bubble shower incorporated stuff to figure that up. That's Mr. Wonderful's job. Mr. Bubble.

I'm here to pitch it. I'm not thinking about the mechanics of this. You have to figure this shit out. You have to build this. Going into the chart tech. It's just having, just pitching something completely impossible.

All I know is I want to do this. Wait, wait. Okay. So clear up some things for me. How does this work? I don't know. That's what I'm here for, idiot. Mr. Wonderful.

You're supposed to invent it for me. How did you get so damn fucking rich if you weren't inventing anything, huh? You're supposed to have one. I read your book. You're supposed to have one million inventions a day. Well, I can get in the shark tank and be like, all right, before I start my pitch, Mr. Wonderful, what do you want most in the world? Okay, I'm inventing that. Okay, my product is new hair.

A boat that can't kill anybody. A safety boat. That brings people back to life. Yeah, he's a man. He's cool as fuck. Oh, man, remember we almost went to a seminar? What was supposed to in Boston? He had a seminar.

Yeah, we were going to go to his, we were going to put on suits and do a bunch of acid and go to this seminar in Malden. And Caleb got sick. Caleb was like, um, I'm, I, I feel so sick. I don't want to go. Yeah, basically, we could have been millionaires that night. We almost went.

And then I was like... Then we were like, what do we do? But we don't have our boss, Caleb, with us. We didn't. No, it made us reconsider. Oh, I'm so nervous. I can't do something without Caleb. No, we knew you were fucking ditching.

And we were like, we knew you reconsidered. What kind of sick were you? I don't know. It was like fucking three years ago. I don't even remember this happening really. He's lying. He's lying. He ate bad food.

Probably. That probably was a... He ate bad food and he just went, oh. I used to eat like such a piece of shit in Boston. Awesome, man. I ate lamb and chicken over rice today. I ate peanut butter and jelly like three times a day when I was a That's healthy.

That's not healthy. That is not healthy at all. It's healthy. No. It's not like the worst thing in the world, but it's not good for you. No. PBJ is healthy. It's like bread and sugar.

And no sugar. Oh, really? No sugar. I said there's no sugar in it. There's no sugar. It's pure sugar. It's not pure sugar. It's peanut butter and it's jelly.

You don't put sugar on it if you want But that's it What's happening? You don't put sugar on it I'm gonna pause it now Okay And that's the first time I crap myself Yep

That was the first time That was the first time I crapped myself Just now when we paused it I'm the special guest I'm Casey Kasem Casey Kasem's brother Can you do Shaggy next? I'm also named K, it's Casey Kaysam

Can you do J-Lano? I don't know who It's short for Ken Christmas, Kaysam. Who is, who is Casey Krasem? He was the voice of Shaggy on the news. Oh, on the news, Scooby-Doo-Doo. He was the voice of Shaggy and the voice of radio. I was so fucking heartbroken to see Shaggy on the news.

Yeah, me too. Well, that's like not like this, yeah. That's the last thing I was expecting him to be eaten by a monster. he finally got eat up by monster he did he got eat up by monster he tried to pull his damn head off Jackie got eat up by monster yeah

what's going on I don't know I think I had too much sugar yeah he didn't have any sugar whoa check this out yep okay did they have a

Twinkie the kid did they put a leash on Scooby-Doo or no no he has a collar though You can't, man. They put a damn leash on Shaggy before they put one on Scooby. That's in case he gets lost, though. But he's like a human.

But he would probably just say, I'm with those. No, no, you guys don't get it. Yeah. Yeah, well, he probably says, rhyme with rose rice. Yeah. Rime with rose rice. French fries? Right, yeah.

I'm with those guys. And then someone would say French fries, and he would go, French fries? Right. That dude loves food way too much. Oh, my God. And don't get me started up. about his little bitch nephew, Scrappy. He's a really poorly trained dog.

Scrappy? No, Scooby. Yeah. No, that's what I was thinking. He's a shit detective, too. They should have, do you think? Do you think? Multiple crimes.

Every day. I feel like, I feel like Shaggy and Scooby must have a really strong friendship because if I had a friend who's poop I had to pick up in a plastic bag, I think our relationship would be very strained. But they eat so much food together. He uses the toilet. I don't think he uses the toilet. He uses the toilet.

He uses the toilet. Is Shaggy. own him? Shaggy goes outside and Scooby do you can probably just poop and leave like it's not that big of you. Everyone's going to be like, who's dog? Oh, Scooby-Doo, awesome.

They're going to be like that. They're going to be like, what the hell there's shit? Oh, Scooby-Doo, that's fun. Oh, it's Scooby-Doo's poop. Yeah. I remember you. I'm going to collect this. I'm going to sell it on eBay.

Scooby snacks. Yeah, I mean, he's eating straight graeme crackers every day. I mean, all. Every once in a whole turkey. They did. One big bite. Yeah, I guess none of them, none of them clean up his poop because there was that one episode where they

go to jail because he didn't clean up his poop. There is, Shaggy and Scooby, are both, at least in the movie, both vegetarian. Really? That's not. What? And Velma wears a thong. Yeah. Valma shows her. Oh, my God. And Mr. Bean's name is Mr. Mondavarius of Spooky Island. Oh, yeah.

Mr. Bean's in that movie. They call him Mr. Freeholi in that movie. They call him Mr. Mondavarius. That's French for Bean. then where did they go in the movie spooky island spooky island in cancun

no uh he's not it's in mexico no it's not i've been there you've not been a spooky island banned the spooky island you know

didn't blow out a a skull made the smoke sing the outcast sing their national anthem that outcast song in the there is always something

going on no it's like I was just like You're just guessing as he's saying. I was also guessing the lyrics too. That's how it goes. Spooky Island was in Australia. Fuck.

Is that the filming location or is that where it actually was supposed to be? Well, the filming location was Australia. It says here that... No, there's an Australian girl in it, remember? Yeah. Well, it also, it says here... Eila Fisher. She was Australia.

It says here that... Not the movie, though. The titular wife of Borat. In the movie, she is canonically married to Borat. Yeah. He's not such a man-Cohan-Cone. Not that's Australian-Cone, yeah. She's my husband.

His name's Borat. His name's Borat. His name's Boratina. Isn't her name Mary Jane? Her name is Scooby's wife. No way. Her name's Mary Jane. That's like my favorite name.

Yeah. Did a... That movie was supposed to be rated R. Yeah. They filmed it rated R. Then they edited it to PG. I would do anything to see the Velmas scenes. Oh, my God.

The phrasing on the... I'm reading Spooky Island. Wikipedia page the phrasing here under notes and trivia this is the only notes and trivia the scenes filmed at spooky island were in Australia at Tangaluma Island Resort where over 400 casting crew took over the resort

for six weeks and transformed it into an exclusive film set 400 Scooby-Doo casting crew members swarm it yeah they do a coup on the resort they're staying climbing up the building like World War Z using each other as a

They're switching, yeah, they're putting up statues of Mr. Bean everywhere. Like, what is this? Yeah, separating, like, parents. It's for the darkapolix ritual. Yeah, I wonder what was, what they cut out of the R-rated one. Probably that's like a word. Weed. Weed, for sure.

Weed, sex. Valmalade, egg. Violence. Drugs. And they, and they kept in rock and roll with sugar ray. Cut out of the adult themes, maybe? Stark depictions of prejudice. It's Australia.

The Aboriginals on the island. Yeah, Mr. Bean's character says, like, and you don't want to go over there. He says, well, they kept that in, but now he's talking about the graveyard. It's a ghost. It's a CGI. It's a cartoon graveyard.

They cgied the word in ghosts. They caged. the word indigenous above they've CGIed it out they turned it into invisible

yeah those ghosts are invisible yeah yeah Scooby do and then they made a second one too

oh my god monsters unleashed and tell you what those movies are good as fuck they're cool dude they're fun to watch they're really funny

Scooby is up to his old tricks in Scooby do two monsters I would say that for certain and I would say I would say the monsters are too

yeah but this time they're real. Peter Boyles in it. More of a Scoob guy. Yeah? Fuck you. Wait, what do you mean more of a Scoob guy?

The new movie, Scoob. I didn't see that one. I didn't see it. I didn't see it. I didn't see it. My nephew probably saw it. You guys want to talk about... But I grew up on that

what's new Scooby-Doo shit. Yeah. They got all the Scooby-Doo shit on HBO Macs, dude. Oh, yeah? Been session some Scooby-Doo. They have a pup name Scooby-Doo. Remember when they did, in the 80s, they tried to do that. They tried to make every show of a baby version.

They have one. Yeah, they have that one that's the live action, like, origin story. It's a great way to reboot. It's a great way to, I mean, it's a great way to sell merch. You ever watch Muppet Babies? What? Yeah, of course. I watched so, we had a Muppets Baby VHS in our, we had a VHS player in our car.

You'd watch the same Star Wars Muppet Babies episode every time we went on, like, a long trip. And then on my, on my birthday, when we went to that seafood place, I looked in, the bar was, playing that Muppet Baby's episode. It was so weird. There's a sign that it's your, that you should get a call. It was a sign that it was my birthday. It's a sign that the bar is run by a pedophile.

Yeah. Yeah, exactly. This is my favorite episode. Can you bring your kids in here? Why is a pedophile sound like that? What is your pedophile voice? I just did a, I just did a pedophile accent.

What's wrong with that? Interesting. That's a regular. A regular pedophile's voice. Well, that's just not where I thought you were going to go. You know how, like, the pedophile in your neighborhood didn't walk up to you and say, like, I have comic books at my house. He didn't, and you went to his house and... No.

What? No. No, I did that. Okay. Alex did that. Alex did that to people. Yeah, that was a crazy voice. I know exactly what you're talking about.

You know what? Believe it or not, we didn't have a neighborhood pedophile grown up. We, there was a. guy in my neighborhood who was just kind of weird and he um tried to he did try to talk to me about i didn't get molested he tried to talk to me about comic books and stuff and then like i think i was talking about um like x-men or something and then he just stood there and tried to like like it was clear that this is probably just like an old autistic guy and he tried to grill me for an hour and then like i tried to grill you i was like oh yeah mom that guy that guy talked to me

about comic books and he's like she was like oh the guy who stares at all the young women at the pool and then my mom started calling him guyco it's such a sad world for for these old autistic men who just want to keep up with the times and feel cool and they just want to talk to kids and ask them about comic books and video games and condom sizes it's just tough out there you know I feel bad you have to respect your elders and go to their houses my mom would call him guyco because of those guyco commercials so they say I always feel like someone's watching me. If Michael Jackson wasn't famous and he was just like a guy with

a job who lived in your neighborhood and looked still like that, would you let your end of life, Michael Jackson. Yeah, yeah, like full, like no no nose, dead, yeah, no nose, crazy bleached skin. And he dressed the same. Would you let your kids hang out with him? If he still

have made a video called Thrill. Yeah, but it's a different video. Does he have Neverland in his backyard? Nope, he has a, he has a DVR. I'm generally It's about all he's got I'm generally not going to let my kids hang out

with like an adult that they don't know Yeah What if he's your best friend Yep he's your best friend And he has a child care license But he also has a pedophile license Yeah but you don't know about it I don't know about it

Okay every day The pedophile license is printed on the back Of his child care license At one time he dropped his child care license And he went don't look at that And you're like what And you didn't because you were such good friends with him Yeah

So with this hypothetical in mind, would you let your kid go over there and eat a spaghetti dinner? This is a cautionary tale of the power of friends. No, it's not a completely made-up story. What if you... Okay, would you let your kid go over and have a spaghetti dinner with him if you had a hundred other kids that weren't going to go? I love all my kids equally. Oh, no, it's tough. I want to go around.

You know, but I also, I need to, like, I need to put him to the friendship test, you know, I need to, like, see what he's all about. I need to see how I am a friend, you know. Can we do that right now? What's the friendship test? I think it's like a dinner. It's like breakfast. It's an activity. That's food.

There's a lot of food. Wait, dinner and then breakfast. So I spend the night in the middle? No, no, no. They're separate. It's like separate tests.

You have to, you guys have all been through these, you know, inadvertently. I'm not accurately trying to do it, but I've had breakfast with all of you. I've had dinner with all of you. Oh my God.

He was setting us up. And I've done activities with you guys. Great. tricked into being your friend. You guys don't talk to me anymore. I thought it was just... Get off the episode. I thought I was having breakfast, dinner, and activities with you.

I didn't realize I was doing this whole thing. I didn't realize it was a test. I did, yeah. I was curious why you brought a clipboard to... Just checking boxes, yeah. Speaking of... Cameron, you're in the 96% all in activities. But 33rd on breakfast, so we're going to need to get those numbers of.

No, wrong. I would be the other way around. I'm great at getting breakfast. I'm bad at activities. Take that back. I feel like I would, honestly, I would probably say you're better at I don't even know if I've ever gotten breakfast with you. I think we've gotten breakfast before.

We went and got breakfast at the Taco Bell on the way to the lake. Oh, yeah. Damn. Oh, yeah. That wasn't breakfast, though. That doesn't count. A friend breakfast is at a diner. Yeah, exactly.

I've been, I've had breakfast with you. And it's all about splitting the check. That's the real. I don't know. I'm sure. That's the real thing. I don't know.

The test. You know what I watched last night? I'm sure. We're not friends. Oh, no. Did a re-watch. Butterfly effect. Oh, so good.

So, it's the fucking, like, I realized last night. You just did it. So good. So good. Yeah, we do that. About the butterfly. It's one of those things, like, where it's just so really. It's one of those things.

It's a really good movie. It's like, that movie is in, like, the same, like, criteria is, like, a mortal technique, dance with the devil. Yeah, it is. It's like your friend's older brother. shows you that movie and he's like you accidentally watch it or your friend's older brother shows it to you and it's like this is the

most fucked up thing you're ever going to see because that movie like literally every scene is just like here's like the most twisted fucked up thing we can think of he has a fat goth roommate who fucks yeah it's like that the guy from Ethan Supely yeah

Scientologist Scientologist for real damn that makes my name as Earl makes sense because Jason Lee used to be a part of the faith probably got him hooked on it yep maybe it is addictive yeah yeah i want to do it so badly yeah i would love to you want to do butterfly effects no i want to do dionetics you want to do the duck butterfly effects you want to save a woman from that explosion you're sinking in so much money into the church

that by the time you're like all right this is fun and i'm out yeah whatever you can't leave you're you're in a billion year you can do just one thing right you can just go for one but i think that's not as fun like that's just you kind of have to go to like church you can just do it for like one year. You know what else? Scientologist? I could quit. Big Bird. Big Bird. I think I know that. What's the guy's name? Big Bird.

Michael Pena? Yeah, Michael Pena? That's the craziest one. Michael Pena is a... That's believable. They're going to come back. If you start naming people like that, they're going to come after us. And then he became a Scientologist in 1999. And then in 2000, he got... Ant-Man. What's it called? He got Crash or whatever.

No, it's definitely is a cheat code. It's crazy. Yeah. Yeah, it's how Big Bird got on. It sounds to me street. I think we should do that... Chloe Feynman is a Scientology. We should choose a book to start our own Scientology. We need to change it to the...

So it's just normal Christianity gets you everything in Hollywood. It's crazy that every Scientologist is the most beautiful person in the world. Every Scientologist is like the most beautiful person. Not Elizabeth Moss. Michael Pena. Elizabeth Moss is the... She was the blueprint, yo. Yeah, she was.

She was. Andy Dick He's in a Oh my God Have you seen that video? Yeah I sent it to Cameron Sightai

I sent it to Cameron Did I send it to you guys? Just the caption of that video It made me like It's a video Andy Dick got the shit kicked out of him in Las Vegas It was like a video

That had one of those like Built in caption That's like on the video It said in giant letters Andy Dick beaten to a pulp And it's a video of him And he's like His face is just like all

puffy and he's like I don't even know what happened oh I just I'm texting I know about the ground you probably tried a finger a bouncer Yeah no and then the woman's like The woman interviewing it was like Andy

Andy what did they look like and he just goes Gangster Gangster A gangster beat up Gangster beat me to a pulp This one for Phil Hartman. To a pulp is such a funny.

Yeah. What's the other one? To a pulp. Kat Williams getting beaten up by the 12 year old. And the kid is like talking shit. And Kat Williams is like trying to be like, he's like, he's like, you can say whatever you want, man. If you have to do it, go ahead.

It's so fucking funny. He's like trying to be like like philosophical about a 12 year old beating him up. He's like, really? You're going to choose violence. Okay. He's like on the ground. Dude, he started it too, which is so crazy. Yeah.

I mean, he seemed like he wasn't going through a good time. He must suck to be 50 and, like, 5'4. Yeah, that's tough. It's his class really winning. And he's also not small. He's not like, like, Kevin Hart's like built. Oh, yeah. Cat Williams is like, he's all purple suit.

He's fucking, he's all zoot suit. He literally is. He's just bones under that. Have you seen, it's him on some radio show, and it's clear that he does not want to be there, and he just keeps making fun of the host. It's World of Worlds with Orson Welles. I do not believe there's any damn aliens going through here.

No, no, it's like, like, this woman makes fun of his, like, hair or something. And then he's just, like, brutal to her for the rest of the episode. And he's like, do you cook for your kids? And she's like, yeah, I make a really good broccoli. And he's like, huh? I love him, dude. He's like, how do you fuck out? There's no way you could fuck up broccoli.

I fuck up broccoli. Dude, I fuck on some broccoli if you put it in front of me. I made a steak... I made steaks the other night. Whoa. They were the... Dude, hell. They sucked.

I was the second time I ever tried cooking a steak, and I'd have no idea how to cook a steak. So I watched some video, and it was like... You need a thermometer, and you need a smoker. Well, it was just saying, like... $600 worth of materials worth of materials. It was telling you how wrong to sear it on either side. But I bought, I didn't...

I didn't even think about this. I bought, like, the thinnest steak that I used. It was like this thin. You stupid, stupid, idiot. It was just like a piece of fucking jerky, dude. It sucked. I've been making a steak. No, it was a prime rib.

Oh, air-friar salmon, very delicious. Is the air-friar work? I haven't cooked meat in like years. Yeah, I have a big-ass annoying one, too. It's great. We just got a toaster oven with our apartment for free. That's actually... I've been using that thing.

Oh, yeah? For what? Toaster oven salmon? For what? You were talking about a toaster oven, I remember. I wanted to bring the toaster oven here, and then I realized I would start a fire. You mean like a little convection oven? One of the front?

Oh, okay. Yeah, dude. That's basically an air fry. I've been putting... Yeah. It's like an air friar with more things to use the power of air. You can't fry anything in it. Metal.

Yeah. It uses metal instead of air. Metal power, yeah. It's like transformers. I think I would make, um, smores in it. Yeah, it's a good idea. She do so moors at our apartment. Yeah.

A little fire. Ooh, she does a fire. Oh, she does a bonfire. Your staircase, like, our apartment's so fucked up. It just goes up the, yeah, the railing, like a fuse. Like I, like, yeah. In my computer.

My room is like, like, zoom, explode. They insulated your room with gunpowder. At this point, I believe it. You can't fucking... You know, the apartments are so fucking dogs. It echoes so much in our apartment. Like, my girlfriend was in my room, and I was in the bathroom. And I went to the bathroom because, like, it was like the first couple of weeks we were, like, seeing each other.

And I didn't want to fart in front of her. I was in the bathroom trying to hide a fart. That's a necessary detail. Yeah, it's a necessary detail. I was trying to hide a fart and it was so long and loud in the bathroom on the other side of the apartment I think that's certainly a you problem

I heard her in my room go what the fuck wait so your complaint is my apartment is so bad that my supersonic fart was hurt on the other side of it you shouldn't be able to hear a fart from the other side of your apartment I really do think that would be the fart

it depends on how loud it is. It doesn't matter. You can hear anything at any distance if it's loud enough. I think you can also like... I had the door shut. You're not supposed to hear anything

the door shuts. But you went to the bathroom, but then you ripped it. Like, you let it loose. Yeah. You have to still like... You spread the butt cheek. I didn't spread the butt cheek.

Spread would make it quieter. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's what you do. What? I did not just fart. You're supposed to...

If you spread... Oh my God, dude. I got so good at doing that in class, like not even, just hands free, just spreading my butt cheeks completely apart and then farting. and then making a face like who did that

and pointing at the teacher hand up hey did anyone else smell that it actually smells like fucking fart all around me right now there is nothing funnier than just like quiet room and so

in high school that only happened my like entire school up to college that only happened one time this kid farted and it was probably because it was only happened

one time it was like the funniest thing I've ever experienced that happened when I was taking my SAT this girl in front of me You're not allowed to talk or make any noise or you get like whatever. The test gets thrown out and this girl in front of me

like sneezed and it was like it pushed out the fart the sneeze. Wait, that's a combo. So that you know exactly why she farted too. The worst is when you're like just alone with somebody and then you laugh you're laying down, you laugh really hard

and just one slips out. Never happened. That doesn't happen to me either. Yeah, that happened to me a couple nights ago. Laying down. You're a lowest one laying down and a fart. That sentence made sense in my head. And you giggle so much that you fart.

I'm not having a good one today. My brain's not on. Mental image. Do you want some guava? Stranger. I'm laying on my belly. I'm just like watching something on my phone. With my feet up in the air.

On the train. I'm watching like a YouTube video and I'm just going Heh-he-h-h-h-ha-h Look at the other guy in the train Oopty!

Yeah. Did you hear that? Please tell me you didn't hear that, but we've all been there, right? I'm sorry. You have to get off the next stop. Yeah. Dude, I never

I never farted so bad. You never farted so bad in your life. I've never farted so bad in your life. I've never farted so bad. In third grade, my teacher, Miss Escobar, because I used to, I used to fart in class so much. Yeah. I used to fart in class when I was in third grade, and I had a green light to leave the room whenever I wanted to. Whoa, they were like, you.

Because it was such a distraction in the class. But then she gave me the power to leave the classroom and also the association of like, when he leaves the classroom, it means he's farting in the whole life. That just took it. That's awful, dude. It was pretty cool. the class clown with the farts for sure yeah you're the class farter then you weren't a clown

clown doesn't fart I was a class A clown can absolutely fart A clown doesn't eat or drink I was a class slave No you weren't Yeah it was no I got forced to do stuff They made you do homework

What the hell is this What did you get my moving in class Is always I everyone thought it was funny When I like jumped over a desk So I would just like just fall A jump over a desk and fall all the time. I remember one time

I was a pretty big I was the smartboard wizard I would do you smart board stuff was funny as hell I would do that too I remember one time I didn't have a smart board me and my friend

we were like giving a presentation in like our French class and they're on the smart board and we both started pressing the smart board at the same time and it somehow like brought up the on screen keyboard and also just like filled the entire screen

with just random letters and we were laughing so hard on that too we got in trouble it was pretty funny we didn't have a smart board we had a piece of wood we didn't have a piece of wood too it's called damn pencil

we didn't even have pencils yeah we had we had uh we had clay we had to use most people you're so fucking stupid it actually is yeah

I use our blood I just was using wood and clay and leaves should do that top 10 Prusa Illuminati is oh yeah

I forgot anyways these are theories on how the Illuminati is warning, this may or may not be a really stupid list. I didn't realize your phone was balanced on your foot and I was like, whoa.

You just like memorize that? We're waiting for your chance. That would be sick. Number one, Obama's forehead is in the shape of a triangle. This one, I believe. I believe this one 100%. I'm going to double check this.

Yeah, I'm not sure I believe that is I'm going to search Obama's forehead. Obama's forehead is in the shape of a triangle. I feel like a triangle forehead is something I would have noticed by now. You'd think that they would show a photo. Obama's got to be like

the person who isn't someone I know in real life that I've seen a picture of the most. I've seen him in person. I've seen so many pictures of Obama. Yeah. So many. I've seen Obama in person.

Oh yeah? Madam Tussos. He was standing there. Oh shit. Wait, guys. He kind of does have a... Show me the triangle. Let me see.

It's not shaped like a triangle, but he kind of has like a triangle. You see that? See that kind of discoloration where his like eyebrows meet? Yeah, I would say that's probably a lighting thing though. Yeah, but on this photo,

Let me see that. It sure does look. It looks they might as well. Oh, shit. Let me see if I find that. I don't know. Let me check some other. Look up Obama's triangle.

This one's got a damn fly on his head. That's Mike Pence. Remind you of anybody? Yeah, Mike. Oh, that's Mike Pence. Whoops. No, I don't, I don't really see a triangle. I just saw, I just found this photo of him.

Whoa. This could actually. I mean, that's plus the thing wide open. Nobody's talking about the triangle hair. Nobody's talking about this. Obama's hair is made out of. of grown chia seats. Yeah, that is true. I've seen him on the commercials with that.

Yeah. No one is talking about this. Look, look, look right here. He has green chia seed hair. Oh, my God. Damn. He's got to be in the Illuminati. Yeah.

Or the green guys. Look, it seems like every president that we've ever had has had green chia seed hair. Here's Donald Trump. And a clay red face. Do you think it has to do with the Joker? No, I don't think so.

Green hair? I don't think it makes sense. I think the Illuminati. I mean, look at this. This is one of our most famous presidents. Is that the... That is, um... Robert Olmeagie.

No? No. Keep guessing Asian guys. Go. That is... Tiger Woods. I'm a good guy. I'm a really good guy.

I guess Tiger Woods. That is president Don Johnson. No. That's an SJW. That's the next president. This is actually... The person who's that away. Yeah, because Biden's...

not getting a second term. You know, when you were a kid and you didn't know who the, like, you didn't know who any of the people were in power. I wish, I, I liked when I, when the person who was running was just a stranger. Yeah. I have, I have a really distinct memory of, I didn't really. Yep. I'm up.

I'm up. I didn't really know who, um, who Dick Cheney was really when, like, uh, Obama was, Obama was being like sworn in or whatever and my grandfather was at our house and he was like, he like, he like, he turned to me. He turned to me and was like, like, oh, like, Dick Cheney's not at the ceremony. He's probably out torturing someone right now, like just trying to get one at the last minute. And I was like, I don't, like, who is that?

You're at home for the inauguration? I feel like that was a school day. There's a kid. It might, I don't know. Yeah, that was a school day. I watched it at home too. It might have been after school or something. You weren't at the end of course.

That's what I was expecting to. Maybe I wasn't watching it live. I was definitely, because my grandfather was not at school. I can tell you that much. He's sitting at the desk next to. He's a tiny little shirt on. And Cameron, I need a ride home. I remember there's this kid in my sixth grade class

and he said in front of the whole class after Obama's inauguration he's like the whole time I was waiting here Jesus And everyone was just like Just looking at him He got reprimanded pretty hard But I was like damn

You my friend Have a future in the CIA What's a word Someone's dad says though And then you're like Yeah that sounds cool to say Yeah, yeah. There were some people in my town who would sit in front of the post office with a table with, like, clipboards,

and they would have a big banner on the front of their table as a picture of Obama with a Hitler mustache. Yeah. They can't do that. They did it. Yeah, I mean. They got chewed the hell out. Yeah. They were kids?

No. No. Number two, jet fuel can't melt steel beams. Oh, hell no. I don't think that has much to do with the Illuminati. It seems like the comments on these are saying the same thing. This is a bit something that annoying. normal person want to think about, though. I think you're

rather weird if you're into this type of stuff. Regardless of what you believe, what the hell does this have to do with the Aduluminati? Here's something I saw on a sticker when time dank memes melt steel beams. Could that be true? That's another clue. That's a sticker I saw at a restaurant. I saw it in a restaurant bathroom. Number three is kind of making me think more about the Obama

one. Number three, there are triangles in the Nazi swastika. Wait a minute. First comment. You mean the symbol Hitler stole from the Buddhists? No, the other one. I mean, that's... No, the one the Buddhist stole from Hitler. All right, let's draw one on Cameron's face.

Okay. We just got to... Let's count the triangle. Seriously, don't. Guys, stop. Well, it's more like there's a square. There's a circle, I would say. There's a square who's using that as a symbol of power.

Listen, guys. Listen, guys, I wouldn't know because I've never even seen one. Yeah, I don't know what they look like. Right angles are triangles. Yep What are you a fucking Nazi I mean if you make a little line I don't think so

Here's an interesting theory here Every triangle has three What's the theory Number four The USA won its independence In a way too convenient year That's just true Yeah

That's facts They literally won in 1776 1776 just looks good on paper And on July 4th, Independence Day. It's almost like they set it all up. I will say 1776 does look really good in like pin fun. The Dumb 7 in general is pretty good. They did it really good.

1776 was like the cool S. Dude, it would have been way better if it was 1777. No. That's an angel number. They should have waited. That's not an angel number. You always say things are angel numbers that aren't angel numbers. 777 is an angel number.

777 is, but 1777 is not. It's three of the same number in a row. But there's an angel number inside of that. So about 12, 12, 12. No. What about 1-1-1-2-2? So that's to be a single-digit. What is an angel number?

That's two angel numbers. They're numbers of the angels. They're lucky numbers. If you see them, it means an angel is getting in contact with you. Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Like if you look at like the clock and it says 4-44. They all mean... Hit record, Joe.

Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Batman Dark Night Rises. Mm-hmm. Yep. Joseph Gordon-Levett. Joseph Gordon-Levett, the Adjustment Bureau. Joseph Gordon-Levett, the Third Rock on the Sun. Did you guys know he's Bruce Willis' brother? Bruce Willis is dead at the end of success.

He made that up. No. Dude, did we do we do... He became... He tried to look like his brother and Louper. No. Go-low. I'm kidding.

What was the movie they did together? Looper. Looper, yeah. Where they were like, just Gordon Levitt. Make him look like... You do chipmunk cheeks. They made him look crazy.

He looks fucked up, yeah. Yeah, he looks like a failed clone of Bruce Willis. He looks like... He also, the point of that is to make him look like Bruce Willis. He doesn't look anything like... You know what he looks like... They should have shaved his head. You know, when they do, like,

it's like, oh, we use, like, AI to recreate this cartoon. Yeah. That's what it would look like if you took Bruce Wayne from Batman the animated series and made him... into like an AI human. That's real-life Batman. Realistic Homer, but with Batman, but with animated series Batman, looks like JGL and Looper.

I wish that Realistic Homer was actually done with computer. Like, if there was actually a program that you could put a picture of Homer and it would make realistic Homer. Yeah, I really like those things. That was, because that was what I always, whenever I saw that picture in like middle school or whatever, I believe there's like, oh, you can just take, there's some program out there.

You can put a cartoon into it and it will make a real person out of it. It's not just the liquefine effect. Yeah. Have you guys seen Realistic Woody? No. That one's cool as hell. Have you seen it's very cool? Have you seen realistic Heath Ledger?

I don't think so. They make him look like he's a Joker for Batman. That's scary. Yeah. They get the Joker's smile wrong though because it's AI. This one? That one, yeah. I like number five here.

You know what? I'm going to be, it doesn't look so realistic to me. It's not realistic, but it's like a fun interoperative. It's real life. They put the prospector, the evil prospector. He's stuck in his damn cage. He looks very unrealistic. It looks like those books that was like, who was Woody?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is realistic. I could see myself walking in a bar. Here's a conspiracy here. He kind of looks like my dad. Guys. Yeah, what's the conspiracy? That number five conspiracy on this list.

President Bush. Yep. Oh, what? Oh, he was a bad president. But surely, he was more likely to be a, vent politician than an Illuminati member. From Mr. Veteran. Bush was a beast, dude.

So many things he did. 9-11, Katrina, and steal oil from Iraq to please his Illuminati overlords. He has one of the best president moments of all time. Yeah. Where he's like, where he's on the golf course and he's like, everyone's seen it. He's like, we're going to find, we're going to find Saddam Hussein. We're going to find his weapons of mass destruction. We're going to destroy them.

Now watch this drive. And then he just hits the golf ball. So far. That is so sick. It's so cool. A homage to his favorite movie, Happy Gilmore. I think it was a Happy Gilmore thing. Because I think now he interns for Happy Madison.

Oh, good for him. Yeah. It's probably because of that. He's just trying to rise up through the race. I thought he was doing a Bagger Vance thing. Maybe he was. It was probably both. Yeah.

He's got like magic powers like Will Smith in that movie. Yeah. Bagger Vance is real. Actually, I met him once. What? Are you guys saying of Hitch? Or not Hitch. Hitch?

That guy's real too. Hancock? Hancock? He's not. I saw a few Hancocks asleep on a bench. Hancock's got to be... I was like, oh, Hollywood's crazy.

They have all these Hancock impersonators. They're filming a Hancock sequel, yeah. Taking a picture with like a homeless guy. Yo, just met Hancock on the street. This man, Hancock! Take, like, a bunch of pictures of, like, you on, like, the Walk of Fame where it's, like, pictures of you with, like, Spider-Man and, like, Batman. And, like, just a homeless guy.

Like, all my favorite superheroes, Batman, Spider-Man, and Hancock. Hancock was swag. Dude, Hancock was so strong. He beat the shit out of him. He honestly might be the most powerful superhero ever. He honestly might be. And he was on fucking drugs and alcohol. He was a god, though.

He's not even superheroes, just a god. He wasn't a god, was he? That's what the movie says. That's the lore of the movie. I thought he was an angel. His wife is an angel, Charlie's Theron. She's the angel. There's an angel.

There's angels. He's my angel. Hancock? Hancock is an angel. An angel? An angel. He's an angelina. Angels and God are...

They're real. They figure in the Hancock lower. Have you not seen Hancock? I think I've only seen it on the effects. I don't think I was allowed to watch Hancock when it came out. I wasn't because of the crass name. Hancock. Handcock.

Is it based on a comic book or was Will Smith just... I don't know what's his name. It's Breaking Bad. It's Breaking Bad. It's Vince Gilligan. Oh, okay. Oh. It's breaking bad

From the twisted line He breaks bad at that movie, bro Number six, George Washington This list does not have a very clear through line No The Illuminati I don't know what they're trying to say George Washington never existed

He was real He chopped down the chaffir First normal mention Number seven is the JFK assassination I believe this didn't happen I agree as hell I'm agree as hell I'm agree as Hall

actually I'm a grew up We fucked it up Such a I'm agree as hall The worst written comment That you can't even read it You try to read it

Correctly Dude I'm agree as hall He was opposed to the Federal Reserve The Illuminati didn't like that Yeah that's that's a little That's some supporting evidence The Illuminati is there to stop people from me I think that the problem with the JFK assassination

Is everyone needs to stop talking about it for like 10 years And then everything about it will be like funny again But everyone's it's too much everyone's doing everyone all this funny stuff has been said everyone said it a hundred times just you take a break pretend it doesn't exist for 10 years that's that could work too but interesting that you find the death of a president to be funny see that's what i'm saying stuff like that it's not we need to take a break a break you're the one who's talking about how much funny

stuff came out about it it's just scary i mean i don't know what can you imagine if a president died in today's day and age with all the phones would be so crazy it would be so crazy. We'd have so many videos of it. I mean, that's why, that's why they have, that's why another one hasn't been assassinated. Everyone owns. Yeah, the phones. Nobody can get off their damn phone. Yeah. Get off your, I was just on my phone. I was just on my phone. Addicted. I am addicted to this thing, dude. It's like a candy bar to me. It is. It's basically like a candy bar that I can look up pictures of other candy bars on. Yeah. That's a perfect candy bar. Waking up in the morning and just reaching over my, my night table and taking a few bites of my

candy bar before you go to bed for an hour. Wait, I don't know what this entry is. Number nine is red scarf deaths. I've never heard of that. What is that? That's from, it's like people who got red scarf disease. I'm going to Google that. Yeah, me too. I don't fucking know. I knew it. I was

just waiting for him to say conspiracy. Facebook posts says Kate's Politifact says Kate Spade worked with the Clintons and suggests they were involved in her death. Oh yeah. Yeah, that's true. Kate Spade killed herself, huh? No, she was killed by She was killed by David.

Because she was killed by Hillary because her brother-in-law, David Spade, was too funny. And he was about to do the funniest impression of Hillary on S&L. Well, he was doing, no, he's doing his... With his long, beautiful lot. What's his show called at night? Like, buzz off with David Spade. That was his late night show or something. That's where all of his guests are at the Sibian.

Yeah. That's a good show. Yeah. Ooh. Oh. You know who they had on that show before she passed? Ruth Bader Ginsburg. Really?

I did. I saw that episode. Lights out. She busts a fatness. That's what it is. Ruth Bader Ginsburg. Basically, first no-hand squirt. Ruth Bader.

It's not the first one. Oh, my God. Squirtbader, squirtberg. Squirtmater, squirtberg. I wish she was still alive. Me too. Which justice of the highest quirt in the land would you like to see squirt the most?

Sonia Sotomayor. I think Sotomayor might be my number one. I need to see, I need to see R.B.G on the cover of a magazine under my mattress. Clarence Thomas wouldn't squirt for any. anything. I could make them. You could not make. How would you make? How would you make? I'd like to see you try. How would you make Clarence Thomas squirt? Check him off. First, I take him out to dinner. I feed him a bunch of Oreos.

No. It just comes everywhere. Oreos are filled with white cream. That's a good point. He's right. He's right. No. He's right. He's right. He's right. The Oreo. The Oreo cookie makes black poop. The white cream makes white cream. Yeah. That sounds true. It's like a bird.

That's because it is. true. Yeah, it's like a bird. And when you put, especially when you put Oreos in Clarence Thomas. He has a, yeah, he has a medical thing, too. That's the other thing we didn't. He's got Oreo spleen. He's got Oreo squirt disease.

Yeah. And the Oreo squirt comes out of his thing. He goes to the doctor. He's like, doctor, every time I eat Oreos, I squirt everywhere. And they're like, oh, we've never, we've never seen this before. Can we call it the Clarence Thomas disease? No. Call it the Oreo Squirt disease, please.

Yeah. So that's how I would do it. Pretty easy. With my hands and his prostate. I don't think you could make him squirt. I would make Clarence Thomas squirt. Prostate nut. I would personally abstain from doing it.

Ah. Court. That's a joke for the smart guys. Number 10, M.K. Ultra. Boring. Heard of it. Number 11, Lady Gaga videos. Does anyone know what this means?

Yeah, dude. There's mad demonic, the Lady Gaga videos. Oh. Yeah. And what does she do? She turns herself into ground beef. Yeah. She's in a bikini.

Yeah. She talks with Beyonce. And she dresses up like a man at the VMAs and sings a... Oh, we're talking Lady Gaga. Yeah. Why are you hiding your eyes with those big ass glasses, bitch? Is it maybe because they are cat eyes? Oh, is that your poker face?

I'm going to poke your face with my fingers. You guys realize... You guys realize in that movie House of Gucci, she got fucked. Oh. Can you send me the skin article? They fucked her. I heard the movie was originally going to be called House of Coochie because of her getting fucked in that movie.

She seriously got fucked. They fuck her in the movie? Yeah, the character fucks her. Which character? Her husband. God, no. On the table. That's demonic.

At work. Fuck. Think about this conspiracy. Ready? And this one's going to blow your goddamn mind. Number 18, Jay-Z, Lady Gaga, and Beyonce all have an ease. sound in their name. Wait.

Petrick. And you, and did you know what? Wait. Petrick. Petrick. Petrick. What if your name was Petrick?

Petrick. Dude. Dude. That's how you say it in New Zealand. Petrick. That's what you say it in robot world. Deering?

Duren? D. How do you say my last name in that? I don't know. At some point these are just triangles. Here's a really good one here. Number 19. The two triangle star. The two triangle star has the triangle of pyramids and the triangle of eyes. The triangle of pyramids is Egypt, Turkey, and Saudi Arabia. The triangle of eyes is the Mediterranean Sea, Syria, and the red star. In the middle of the star is Israel, and the Israel flag is the two triangles star. Thank you, Ryan Higa. Is Ryan Higa spreading truth about Illamida? The later ones get pretty good. Get your shirt on my face. 26, all of Apple's products start with an I.

And someone says, iPhone, iPad, iPod, I Mac, Iraq. And then the one after that is, number 27, music has changed after the 1980s. Yeah, and then number 33, I'm too sexy, right said Fred. Yep. Listen to sample. M and MTV. Of course. Wall of Trump.

Homer the Great. We do. I don't know you could put number 45, new SpongeBob. Number 44, 2009. Facts. Fear. Number 46, the eye on ZZZZ app. ZZZZ app.

Old television comic show. AmeriX wouldn't have heard of it, probably. How about the one creepy bloke who was only one, series one, tricky dicky. Oh, I ate the creepy bloke. The only thing that scared me most was no talking and the theater, the handymen were in the theater with just hands. What the? What the? I did not have, like, a stroke.

That's how, the person writing that, fucking, I was reading that as is. I thought you had a complete stroke. I thought, like, I was going to have to take your ass to the hospital. I was reading that, and I was like, am I really as illiterate as I think? Like, I was like... I think, I'm thinking I'm having a stroke probably twice a week. Yeah, I woke up the other day and I felt like a pain in, like, my, one of my sides. And I was like, yeah, this is finally it.

I have a strong feeling that I'm going to one day go to the doctor and I'll, it's be one of those guys who's like mid-20s and they're like you've had 500 mini heart attacks or mini strokes every day. I think that too. Yeah, I have a similar thing. Makes perfect sense to me. I have a heart attack every time I'm a freaking bust. You know what I'm saying, fellas? Oh yeah,

a different kind of stroke. You have a heart attack when you bust? Yeah, because it feels so good. My heart stops. Ooh, I'm trying to bust. It doesn't happen to you? No. I'm trying to do it. One day I'm just going to like have a lot of trouble breathing and it's just like, oh like you've just had a problem. them for a year and a half.

Yeah. And it's already spread to some place. You just go to the doctor like once a year? No. I went to the doctor and got all these blood tests and I didn't pick them up for six months and it turned out I had hepatitis A. And then I just like, I picked him up and I was already, I already didn't have it anymore. Yeah.

So I just leave. How does one get hepatitis A? It's usually because somebody makes you food and has poop on their hand. I think I talked about this on the podcast. Can it be your poop though? huh it could be your own no you can't get it I talked to the doctor

and the doctor was like the doctor was like the doctor was like so you have hepatitis A and she was like have you in the last six months have you knowingly put human feces in your mouth

and I was like no and then she's like are you sure like I was gonna be like yep all right you got me I eat shit that's my thing though

yep it's what I do I do you poop though A shout out to them. Wyckoff Medical. That's nasty. Go subscribe to HomePlanet's Patreon. Oh, yeah. Please.

Some fun stuff on there and you'll like it a lot. And please do that at what? Homeplanet.com slash or Patreon.com slash Homeplanet. Yes. What days is this come out? And yeah, right, this comes out. So when this comes out, we are currently on tour. Oh my God.

But it's not too late to buy tickets to. What's the next show? Atlanta's next. Yeah. Fort Worth. Austin. Atlanta. L.A.

San Francisco, Chicago. And LA We fixed the ticket price That happened three weeks But the LA tickets were They were $50 Because some guy Fucked it up

But now they're normal 25 Three weeks from now is my cousin's wedding So Alec and Emily Congratulations And I guess like if you Seven months from now is Christmas And we're adding a tour date In Las Vegas

The Joe show The Joe show is going to Las Vegas The North Pole Budapest Doing a little residency in Las Vegas before taking it on the road. That's going to be awesome. It's going to be tight by the time

you're done with that Las Vegas thing. Oh, my God, forget about it. Right now, it's just like fucking crazy. But I'm going to get to it. All right. Bye. Bye.