Podcast About List - Ep. 238 - Happy Doctor's Day 2 ft. Pierce

Episode Date: April 19, 2023

The doctor's are in and they're laughing at my condition, it's Practo with Pierce. Follow Pierce: https://twitter.com/cringe_genius Watch the full video for this episode youtube.com/@PodcastAboutList Buy tickets to our latest live show https://www.swagpoop.com/shows Get extra premium and Gun City RPG episodes at https://www.patreon.com/podcastaboutlist Follow us https://www.swagpoop.com/links

You're a jerk You're a jerk Oh, we got to do it, please. Yeah, we have to do it. Okay, set it up. This one. Yeah, okay. You're ready?

No, I'm ready. You're a jerk. I don't. Oh, I have to find the right. You're a jerk. It's pretty easy for me Yeah, you're a jerk I know

How about the blue to reverse? You're a jerk I know This is, yeah This is me talking to chat GBT, the robot website GGB-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-E I call that robot a jerk

All day, all night Can we say jerk? I don't want to be a robot anymore And this is my normal voice Wait, stop Is jerk the joke the J word. Well, okay, in the context of that, I think the J word was, I guess you can say blank off. But you can't say it with off after it maybe. Yeah. Is that where jerk comes from?

Jerk comes from chicken. No, it doesn't. Jamaica. No, no, no, no, no, no. Jerk comes from. Hercie, jerky, movement. But is jerking like jizz or jizz. Oh my God. That's a dollar in the jar. You can't say that, guys. Here's gets the swear list better than you do. And you're the one. You were here for its inception. That should be the J-C word. You can't say inception.

You can't say inception. The PG-13 movie. Oh, my God, yeah. All right. That's newly established. Whatever. Hey, Pierce. How are you?

Hi, guys. Good to be back. What a lovely setup you guys have with all these these, Mike Garms that touch each other. Yeah. I bet you're impressed.

Look at this. It looks like the Eiffel Tower right now. Say that again? That looks like the Eiffel Tower. What? This looks like the Eiffel Tower. I think it looks like a spider. No.

The spider tower. Yeah. Actually, the spider, the Eiffel Tower does look like a spider. What are you on, mate? With four legs. A four-legged spider. No, it doesn't. It looks like a four-legged tower.

It looks like maybe a million spiders in the shape of the Eiffel Tower. It does. See, that's a really good point. You get it. Yeah. I think as I get older, I'm realizing that I have no interest in going to France. Yeah. Keep me away from there.

That's a country for high school. I do want to see that. I do want to eat a snail, though. I never want to see that country. You can eat a snail. ground. You can eat a snail at home. Every time it rains, I get hungry for a snail. You took that food disgust test. The funniest

question on it was, there's this test where tests how disgusted you are by like certain food hygiene things, whether or not you eat something. And one of them was, if you were eating a salad and you found a snail on it, would you keep eating in salad? I was like, I don't know.

That's such a funny thing to ask you instead of like a cockroach or an ant. A snail. A snail. A snail is the perfect thing. because it is food. Yeah. And it's a trick question. The snail is probably... I got this fucking escargo salad.

There's a bunch of snails in it. It's one of the animals that is, when it's alive, it's closest to its food form. Yeah. Because it's just... There's almost no difference between... I'd say maybe a crab. A crab also. Is up there.

I just cursed and I didn't even realize it. What'd you say? Well, clearly you realize that you're getting out coins. F salad. I said effing salad. What kind of F salad? I didn't even catch that. Yeah, none of us.

caught that. My gosh. That's just my internal mind. I mean, good job for self-reporting. Yeah, that actually is pretty sweet. That's very noble of you. Wow. You all looked at me and then I was like, did I say something wrong?

And I was like, oh, yeah, I did. Yeah. Have you guys stopped? I've started not cussing in my day-to-day life also. My girlfriend said a swear and I said, oh. I was like, what did I do that? If you guys don't go a full year, who's fault do you think it will be for tapping out? Patrick. Yeah. No. You guys think one another. I am definitely the worst. He is wearing.

There's the dirtiest mouth. Buddy's been paying. I'm a potty mouth, but Patrick doesn't like the swear jar. I don't like the swear jar, but I'm going to abide by it. I think it's good. Yeah. I don't like the cops, but I'm going to abide by all their rules. So, same things. Wait, I think anti-police, anti-cop. You better bet Wow, that is He just got home Yeah, and also I think it's fun To be building

Maybe the A community Yeah, well, the anti-swear community It's a movement There are people who really don't like The swear jar I've learned People who message me say

Well, they can buzz off Yeah, don't bend the need to those haters Yes, they message me They send me all these messages They say F you you, P-O-S, not point-of-sale. Not point of sale.

Yeah, not point of sale. And they say, I'm going to K-I-Double Hockey Stix U. Wait, can you not talk about, like, homicide? No, but we decided violence was okay. Violent, yeah, you can talk about all the violence you want. I'm going to murder these mother-haters. That's good. See, that's exactly what you're looking for.

You can say these monkey fighters. What? Jesus Christ, dude. Wait, are you like to... No, can I not say Jesus Christ? No, you can say it. We decided that it's an atheistic. It's an atheist swear jar.

Monkey fighting is from snakes on a plane, though. Oh, on this Monday to Friday plane. Yeah. Yeah. Not what, I don't know why everyone said J.C. after I said that. That's just me. Yeah. There's only me who did that.

Well, you're everything to him. Yeah. You are my world. Well, good luck. I'm going to try to make it through without swearing. It's going to be, do you guys have anything in your slide today that has cussing in it? I mean, well, so here's what I was thinking, right? So we decided that a lot of these words, the P-U-S-Y word, the D-I-C word, I'm not spelling them fully because I don't, you get the idea, I don't want to go all the way.

But it's some of the more anatomical words, testes. Right, this is a medical episode. We're returning to practice. It is medical in this context. So in this context, we are the doctors answering these questions. Right. And then the patient doctor confidential, basically this, you're, you're locked in a doctor's office right now with us. Oh yeah. And nothing leaves these, these. Oh, I think. I think if the patient says it, the patient types it out, I think that we have to, we can spell it out. We have to repeat it. We should have dressed up like, well, you did. But yeah, I found out of doctors outfits almost. I'm wearing a doctor's outfit. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm a hip doctor in the 1990s. Chill doctors. I'm the chill. Four guys who are all your doctor. Yeah. Have you guys ever had a young doctor? It drives me crazy.

I have a young psychiatrist. Get away from me. It drives me crazy with desire. Yeah. If you don't, wait, no. Oh. I did one time. The one time I've been to a doctor.

I did have an athletic ponytail doctor who cleaned my ears out. Yeah. Get away from me. That's the only thing they did, though. They laid me down and they squirted in my ear. What? They had to lie you down for it? Well, you think I'm going to tilt my head like this?

She said, get on the mat. She said, get on the mat. Get on the mat. Get on the mat. It's type of squirt. Get on the mat. Yeah. She said,

I'm going to bubble your ear up with my squirt going. Yes, she did. She said that. She said, I'm going to bubble in your hole my squirty. That sounds like a practical question.

That's your tip, can't Dr. bubble my squirting ear? She did. And then she said, does that feel better? And it did. Yeah, I can imagine

if it would feel better to get squirted in your ear. She gungged my wax out. She plunged my wax out. She plunged my gunge out with her squirt gun. Wait. Her bubble gun?

You went, wait, wait, you went to the doctor to get them chemically irrigated? Yeah. Is it that bad? Well, I woke up one day. Well, for like two days my ear was itching really, really bad. And then I would go in, because I scratched my ear, I just put my finger in and I go like this. You do that thing with the... And then I make a...

How come you couldn't do it right there, but he could? What do you mean? And then I could go. That's the one I know. Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. I don't think we talked about this, but the first time I met Kayla, are you going to do your... No, you're a little pierce voice.

You do? Doing that with the... Robot voice? It's not going to sound like anything. Can we try it? It's nothing. Just a piglet. They almost sounded exactly the same.

First time I met you, Caleb. I had a really bad allergic reaction. To what? To meeting you? To meeting you? Maybe weed. But you were just like, what the fuck is wrong with you?

You were right in my face. Oh, God. But Caleb said it, so he has to put it in. It's a memory swear. Okay, I don't have any more cash because I only allotted $1 for today. Was that mean? No, no, no, you were just... It's stuck with you.

No, it's the exact thing that I would do in that situation. First impression, you go really, really hard. Oh. I mean, you know, you broke the ice. I wasn't offended. It was just shocking. I'm a bad way. You're a sweetheart.

I'm so sweet. Anyhow, yeah, she, I was scratching my ears like that. It really hurt, really, really itched. And then after two mornings of that, I woke up. and then my ear was wet on the inside, and I couldn't hear, and it hitched and it hurt. Wow. I went to the urgent care, and she was like,

okay, one ear looks fine. The other ear is completely blocked. It's going to need to be bubbled. Yeah, she said, I need to get my bubble gun to squirt you out. Sit here while I get my bubble gun. Wait. There was like a case on the wall.

She turned a key and opened up. I've always wanted to use this. Yeah. I thought that they just put like peroxide in your ear. So they, They, I drop peroxide, but then they also have a windex bottle that is pierced on three sides so that it goes triangle blast. That's what she put in.

That's cool. It was great. That's pretty crazy. I want that badly. It was cool, man. I would love to get, like, every single cavity in my body just deep cleaned. Yeah. Or just filled.

My butt hole. Filled with, like, the expanding foam. Yeah, the foam. Yeah, they should put foam in my hole. Or would they do with, like, an anthill. Oh, yeah. Molten tin. Oh, I would love that.

It would be very immoral. but whoever was willing to do that to a human body would be one of the greatest because it would have to go... You put all the... You put all the molten metal in there and then you just put the person in a microwave

and all the stuff will come off. I said ass stuff. Oh, okay. Yeah, like goofy. I would actually put them in acid and then I would bring their body back up and everything would be melted except for the metal.

Yeah. So that would be my... Well, microwave is more of a household item so it's a little easier to do. Oh, a microwave that can fit a person. And your microwave not fit a person? There is a microwave. But I don't even have a microwave.

Wow. He's got an air fry. Yeah, he's got an air fry that only goes to 400. Yeah. We've talked about this. And my air friar, well, that's because Teflon is very dangerous above 400. I don't have a Teflon one. You have a nonstick.

I have a really, really good air friar. And his goes to 400. Damn. I made that up about Teflon, too. But you got scared. He's got... I think he's bad at every single... Teflon's good for you.

Otherwise, he wouldn't have been called Teflon. I think that they find Teflon and like polar bears and stuff now. Yeah. What is the- That's good. It keeps them alive. I don't believe so. What's,

it's like the film on non-stick pans. Is that what Teflon is? Yeah, yeah. So non-stick pan. Yeah. And so the... I feel like every time I make an egg on the Teflon pan,

I'm just getting little bits of Teflon. You definitely are really bad for you. That's what happens. Yeah. Are you using a fork and scraping the pan? I'm using a spatch, but... Are you scraping the pan, though? I guess, yeah, it's bad, right?

Yeah, it's really bad. So what are you supposed to do with eggs? You're supposed to do a lot of oil in a steel pan. Yeah. But then the, I guess I've also heard butter, a ton of butter. You get an all clad or a, uh, uh, uh, ex-quodgousia says I always use my non-stick pan for eggs only. Regucia is, look at Regucia, look at the size of his body, his weird proportions. Yeah, he's got a puffy body.

He's puffy, and it is completely his whole. He's got a puffy plump going on. And he's a nerd who lives in Atlanta. Right. Get out of there. He's not in Atlanta. He's in a cool city. Okay.

I guess so. But he belongs in the Pacific Northwest. That's where he should be in the pump. He should be in Seattle and he should be wearing a really, really bad t-shirt. He should be wearing the sub-pop logo. If you're listening, and we know you are, you have this one. If you're listening, I need you to go up one shirt size.

That's right. Wow. Yeah. Adam Rugguccia, you need to stop wearing mediums and get some large. Adam Rugguccia, you got to stop doing laundry. You got to stop drying your shirts, really, because your shirts can, I can tell they got a lot of right on. For Adam Rugguccia. Adam Ruggusia, one more thing.

Stop buying V-necks. Yup. That's right. Also, you've got a bacon neck v-neck. This is whack. Yours are so whack. A bacon-neck v-neck. You're referencing the Michael Jordan Haynes commercial.

what is wrong with you nothing really okay that's Adam Ragousia fixed your wife's teeth yes you have enough money mother

and make it mom mother nice hey Adam Ragousia how would you make another good recipe video

yeah that's right that's right that's right stop making your podcast start making Stop. Start making your podcast. We're just going in on Adam.

It needs to end now. Make your P-pods on the cast iron. Hey, and J. Kenji Lopez, stop taking the point-of-view videos unless you're going to play paintball. Nice, dude. That's him playing paintball. Yeah. That's me playing paintball with him. Yeah.

Or, that's it is for making me make a 12-hour bolognese, you piece of crap. I'm done with the soundboard. Okay. Yeah, we want camera to talk again. He's zoning in. He's basically looking at his phone. You would be such an excellent producer for Howard Stern. Oh, yeah.

I would be trying to fix his voice with all the voice effects. I'd be down there. I'd be eating Robin out underneath that booth that she's always in. Oh, my gosh. You never see. I don't think you're allowed to say that. What is his name? What is his producer's name again?

The guy who does the impression of Ronnie the limo driver. Baba booie. No, no. Who's the guy, who's always there? And he does the Ronnie impression. Otis. He's great. Crodis.

Otis. Otis. His name ain't Otis. Okay. I was at the... Odis. I was at the movie theater. This is my producer.

Odis. Diss, my producer. Probedoosa. Probadoodoo. Where were you? I was at the movie theater. I wish I had the soundboard so I could hit the D world. You will never have a soundboard.

You are the last person that will ever be behind those wheels. And this is something that has really been making me laugh for the past few days. Me and Alex are seeing the Dungeons and Dragons movie, which was wish I had a poop fart sound on the soundboard so bad but some

this couple brought there really little kid like this like probably like three year old girl like really little and she was doing the little kid thing and running around

the front of the theater and like just like screaming and like running back and forth and at one point she like her parents are sitting in the front row

like on the right and she ran over to the left of the front row and then she stopped and looked around and went Daddy where are you getting really scared

and crying where are you where are Are you? Dad, where are you? Kids are as stupid as rocks. That was the hardest I left in a movie theater in so long. Like 20 feet in one direction, get really scared.

You think that movie is too scary for that kid? Maybe that's why they got freaked out. There were some parts where there were monsters on screen and the kid went, ah! Why bring your kid to that? If you bring your kid to like a movie that has like realistic looking. dragons and like skeletons and stuff. The crowd for that movie made me so mad because it was all,

it was all middle-aged dads who were bringing, like, bringing their like 13-year-old sons to the movie to try it. You could tell they're being like, oh, we're going to see the Dunedown. Oh, yeah. No more Iron Man for you. Literally like three of those of those father-son couples. Yeah. If you turn them on to the

real stuff. They're couples. I think you made a pedophilia joke just now. Wait. No, Cameron didn't make a joke. You made a joke. No, he called them father's son. There are a couple of people.

If you run out of coins, by the way, you're going to have to put your keys in there. Okay, you missed. I'm not a, I'm not, you missed a dime. It's a dime. It's a dime. Oh, I see there's another penny. There's a penny next to it. Oh.

Yeah, I have to put this penny in for wrongness. Being incorrect. Yeah, wrongness is a big one. Yeah. Let's get, let's get into practice. Practo. If you guys haven't seen the other Practo episodes or listen to them. Practo is a website that mostly caters to the country of India.

Which is the biggest concentration of people on the planet? Is that true? I do believe so. This time around, I've discovered there are some people from other countries who post them. Really? Yeah, no, there are. There are some people who post from America even. Yeah.

Even really good countries like America. It's kind of the only website. where you can get on-demand access to a medical professional. It's a medical advice. It's Yahoo answers for doctors and patients. Yeah, it's like, it's just like that, but you have to be, I think you have to be like a verified doctor to actually like answer any of these. Oh, no, you don't have to be verified anything to ask a question.

You don't have to be a verified doctor to. I think we'll see probably some of it because sometimes we include the doctor's responses. Yeah, some of these, yeah. My favorite doctor's response is basically just buying time like, all right, well, why don't you tell me a little bit more about what's happening? It's so funny, because there's also, this website has no functionality at all for replying to an answer. Like, they're like, so it'll be like, yeah, somebody will ask a question, like, I'm dying. What do I do?

And the doctor will be like, well, what do you mean? And there's no way for the person to respond. The other thing to mention about PRACTO is that is a website that basically does not exist. It's impossible to find. Yeah, you have to Google search it. This thing, I remember because we were like trying to find new stuff for it. And the only way that Pierce told me that the only way to find it, was looking up the word tummy worm on Google until you find...

Google tummy worm, in quotes. You have to, yeah, you have to search for... Tommy worm, practo, and it was the first thing. Yeah. You have to search, like, practo, and then, like, yeah, like, a medical thing. And then you have to find an answer page. And then from there, you can get to the search page, but you, like, can't get there.

They hide it on you. They hide it on you because they don't want you. Yeah, they don't want you to... They don't want you to know all this great information. They know if the people who post screenshots of, like, two-sentence horror stories from Reddit or whatever get their hands. hands on precto. It's completely over. And we just explained that

to get there. We are breaking the Hippocratic oath by doing what we are. We'll put a big sensor beep on that explanation. Here's my first one. Can I just actually, before we start, I want to issue just a call to arms to the podcast about listeners. If you know

anything about coding, could you please unzip all of these responses somehow and get them into some kind of data set? because I feel like it's impossible to look at all of the things that are like to search and get all of the entries returns. We need some kind of crawler. Some kind of

Zuckerberg needs to get on here. We need a Neo to get inside the website and run around. I need to be uploaded into points so that I can fight this guy. This is from a male who's 28 years old. He says getting dark day day by day. I use pairs

face wash and lotus moisturizer but I get dark day by day. I need solution for it. I'm really getting very black. I do bath with bore water. I don't know what. So the sun is making him darker, but he's getting black. He's getting very black.

Yeah. I don't know what bath with borewater. Erection problem, male 39 years old. Whenever I try to intercourse with my wife, my penis could not erect it. Then I tried to erection manually. It has also failed. At last, ejaculated with little demon. The semen is seen in a clear form.

me, sir. Oh, wait, a genie coming out of your... Nothing's wrong here. Also, a little... I think this is a... I think this is just like a typo. Maybe he did this with dictation

because demon and then... Yeah, I think demon is supposed to be semen. I agree with that, but also the fact that he would dictate this entire thing... No, I think he's trying to... He's doing a double this on his thing.

Yeah. Yeah, he's trying to fix it. I guess that's trying to start it up. Erection manually, does that mean... Just hold it in... Yeah. Hold the top and the bottom. Yeah.

He asks his wife to hold it. He asks his wife to hold it, and he just backs out about the room. Oh my God. I look, I'm as hard as a rock. Pulling a baby tooth. I'm as taught as a high wire. Look at this. Yeah.

Getting an erection, like, trying to rip a Band-Aid off. Don't go slow. Just rip it out. Yeah. Can you imagine how terrifying. it would be to ejaculate little demon. Yeah, his wife is like, okay, nothing's working.

Try using little demon. Yeah, little demon. Little demon is a mythical creature that helps him. Okay, I'll try a little bodod. He, like, draws a summoning circuit. He's got, like, he's got to, like, pray to look at a little stench.

No, it's a really, it's a really hot little demon. They open a jar. There's some demon. No! His great, great grandparents left a treasure chest for him. Yeah. to use a secret sign to open it.

In case of manual erection. How to stop porn addiction in weeks. I love to watch porn. But when I try to do images of my own daughter come in my mind, like that she is doing porn videos. And every act in videos, even when I am not doing, then also images of her come in my mind how to stop porn addiction. Holy shit.

So this guy has a serious problem. Yeah. How to stop it in weeks. I need to do it in weeks. The weeks does make this so much more sinister. Yeah. You have no idea. If it doesn't stop in time.

Yeah, exactly. I don't know what it's going to happen. I don't like it. Addicted to gay ideals. I am seeing gay videos and I am affecting badly with others. He's seeing gay videos in his mind. I am seeing gay videos. Sorry, can you repeat that?

I was seeing gay videos while you were talking. Addicted to gay ideas. I like that. It could be videos or ideas. I don't know. I really, I know it's supposed to be videos, but I really want it to be ideas. This is like a succession level

Schrodinger's thing if it's crossed out or underlines. An idea or a video. Penis liquid is insane. Hi there. My son was playing on his video game whilst needing the toilet. He was really addicted to it.

He wet his pants. Whilst wetting his pants, one drip of liquid fell down his leg and he wondered what it was. He touched it and held it up. And he said it smelled like urine and it was an oddly colored pee. However, he looked closely

and saw white dots in the white liquid, and he was worried what it could be. My son is 11, and he is not really public or pubic yet, with only a few long pubic black hairs. Help. A few, wait, like a... He has only a few. Well, that's what it works.

One or two really long. That's how he grows. It's like... Patrick still hasn't grown pubic hair yet. Exposed. Unfortunately, it is cartoon logic. You grow four homer hairs on your scrotum. It's just hanging over it, like a really long

food bitch. Yes, that is what happens. That's exactly what happened. What happened to you? Patrick just woke up and was fully pubic. I guess I would believe that. I mean, but that is... This is also funny also that it's white dots in the yellow drop of peat.

Of course, that's like the shimmering of the light, right? The big twist to me in this one is that the kid is in sixth grade, like, and he's so addicted to video games and he just pees his pants on his playing. He was really addicted to it. Really addicted to video games.

I love the line, whilst wetting his pants, one drip of liquid fell down his leg and he wondered what it was. He was in the process of peeing his pants and he's like, wait, what's this? Wait, what's a single drop of liquid? It also means that he's so addicted, he does this all the time. Pissing his pants while he's playing. Dad is never contacted. But it's like, Dad, I pissed my pants again while playing. He's like, sure, son.

Well, what happened this time? Well, there was one drop of mysterious liquid. I have to go to the computer. It was shiny. Wait, yeah, get up the good. I have to look up why. How to stop watching porn video MasterBah. If I think any sexual thing, my penis erect painfully and whole body is shaking and painting,

and what is the problem? I think he has it perfectly at the end. What is the problem? Sounds okay to me. I love painting. They say painting all the time. It's so good. Addicted to porn videos.

Sir, I am addicted to porn videos. How I can avoid this habit. I am loosing my concentration on studies. I want to become a government servant. Please help me. This one, I saw this one too, and I didn't put it in mind, but it made me search the word servant. And there are so many of that are end with, I want to become a government servant. Yeah, I don't want to be a servant personally.

Me neither. Started seeing sad videos. Hi, doctor. My boyfriend had suddenly started seeing sad videos and emotional things. And even he does not sleep at night. He watches these videos all day long. And a counseling psychologist says, this situation should not be ignored. take him to a psychiatrist for evaluation

and necessary medication if required the doctor will advise after necessary diagnosis This is probably the most deranged behavior you can have on the internet It's being addicted to sad videos And more deranged to post on a medical website And then the it's even more deranged For the psychologist on the website

To be like, this situation should not be ignored It's serious It's worse than porn addiction is watching Sad videos all the time And you need to come see me You need to come to my office So I can fix all that. This is by far the most serious, like, reply that I've seen on this website.

Yeah, they never get this serious. It's always like, take a capsule or you're fine. Yeah, or just keep looking for answers. Or send me a picture. Yeah, send me a picture. This guy says in this situation. Just biting time. Should not be ignored.

Watching adult video. Hello, sir, slash ma'am. I am 22 years old. I watch the adult video. While watching that kind of video, my sperm comes out and I feel dizzy and sleepy. Please consult me how to get rid of it. I guess I'm watching the video Male 22 years old

Yeah I like I like that he's Come out He's like well how You just watch a porn video Oh Oh

Not even touch You have the The cartoon birds Going around A cuckoo pox That would be Definitely worth going to the doctor And then how to get rid of it

Get rid of what You're watching porn And then you're just sort of leak He wants to get rid of the spurns, I think. This one, I thought it was funny. My amount is debited, but not video call. No video call with doctor, but amount is debited. That's my reaction to getting scammed.

Maybe this is the sound of them holding in their anger. I'm aware that it is a different country, and that could be his name. I don't know. This is also another time. There's so many posts of, I was supposed to have a video call with a doctor and you never called me. I've been debited, but like, I don't think it's an, I don't think it's an IT problem. I think it's, I think it's all the doctors who have, like, put in their fake credentials so they can send me a picture of your penis. Addicted to sex.

I have been addicted to my aunt for sex. When she sleep, I have a tendency on peeping and pressing private aries. Oh, no. A tendency on peeping. we can guess that the advice here spans you are a deranged rapist to it's fine to love your aunt I think

yeah I didn't include the answer but the answer was so just like yeah you know it's normal to have sexual urges but you shouldn't do it like that his aunt is asleep and he's walking up

and pressing his balls against her back did you look up the word peeping to find this? I looked up aunt I did I look at Because I also looked up peeping. Really? Well, I didn't.

So also, so shut up. Addicted for blue films. I'm addicted to watch blue films. What's the solution to stop watch blue films? Please help me. I'm too much suffering. Blue films. I don't know.

I searched blue. Because somebody was like, there was a lot of really bad ones that were like, my baby turned blue, my friend turned blue, my friend turned blue. and now he's asleep forever but this one I just thought was this is blue films is the the fancy version of sad videos oh yeah

oh my god wait yeah he's the boyfriend yeah I don't want to say sad videos because people were making fun of me I'm addicted to watching blue films

yeah it's a little a little more yeah there's a little more dignity in it yeah those are on my slides hell yeah

beautiful blue films okay I'll go next. I think we helped everyone just based on yeah

yeah all right so I tried to make an account we're a doctor so you come in and you say help I'm addicted

to watching blue films and we all all forth laughing and it's just the laughter is the best medicine

imagine you're sitting in a waiting room and you see somebody go in and you just hear four people

in the examination room dying laughing and then he just walk them walk out and then you just hear them all just doing

like pitch voices to you're a jerk I know yeah brrah so you just hear

the bros sounded back down in time yeah the doctors have a sound board wah

wah I'm completely addicted to blue fields bro this all right so fudge

one two three four was I was trying to make an account to maybe like I was trying to become a

doctor on here to see oh my gosh Oh, really? Wow. But I didn't get, one, I didn't get my code. They were supposed to send me like a, like an, oh, like a one-time password or whatever. But also, Fudge 1, 2, 3, 4 has been seen 64 times in practice of data breaches.

Wait, Practo told you this. Practo told you this. You cannot use Fudge 1, 2, 3,4. That happened 64 times in other data breaches that we had. That is crazy. So this first one here, eaten lizard poop, I didn't really think it was like,

a baby ate lizard poop, but eaten lizard poop was funnier. Female doctors can't stop masturbating. I'm gay, so I need a female doctors to talk to. Thank you. To which Dr. Murphy said gay

and want to talk to females, okay. I'm confused. Okay, do you? This next one here, Matrix Therapy. Marrying relative. I'm going to marry my relative. It's a direct blood relation.

What precautions should we take before marriage and sex? I'm going to do it. It's so funny to not even be like, should I do it? Yeah, like, is it dangerous? I'm already halfway through. I'm going to do it. Yeah. I'm the morning of the wedding.

He's like, maybe I should have thought about it. She's walking down the aisle on me. I also love. I love precautions. We should, like, precautions we should take before sex. Okay, but precautions you should take before marriage. You should make sure you have a really good comeback for something to say when people ask if you're blood-related. Precaution, I guess.

That's a very good doctor. You should get a really good prosthetic disguise. I guess you should get a suit and a ring. Those are precautions you need to take, I guess. Think about the budget. Yeah. All that got food. You need food.

A flower girl. Appearance. Appearance. What am I supposed to do in order to look extremely hot to a girl? What am I supposed to do to look extremely hot to a girl to which this doctor says

consult on precto chat? This is a diabeticologist. This guy commented on like a bunch of shit oh my God, a bunch of stuff just saying consult on practo chat. He just really wanted to talk to people.

And then you pay you know, you pay to talk to them on Practo chat and they never show up to the video call. Dang. The whole website, it's a... I might have sworn a lot and not gotten busted, so please let me know how... Once it's released, I'm sure, yeah, thank you.

We'll count it, we'll tally it up at the end, and then you can... We'll send you an invoice. Who do this half-half-butt advice are going to get paid, like, just for sitting down and answering a hundred questions with, I'll talk to you about this later. Wait, this whole website is...

Is Practo pay doctors? The thing is, I, well, I think, no, the patient's pay for a consultant. for a video call. Yeah. So I think that I would imagine that a lot of these people are... Like the doctors? Like the doctors responding on text?

You think it's just a hobby? They don't get paid to do that? I think they're doing this for the love of the game. No, I think that is a... That will directly lead to the... To write this? No, I don't think... I think he's doing it because it has this button that says...

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. It leads to him getting paid. This is the beginning of the scam. Yeah, exactly. All of them are always saying, send me something because I think they don't get paid. I think the doctors on Practor

are probably doing the exact same thing as us where they're looking for the people who need a consultation the most of they go on there and they type in like dead baby turned blue. Hey, hit me up. I think it was a yes, brum. Yeah.

Glob. Pannis. This next one. Depression. My beloved blocked me from our Twitter group. I'm extremely worried. Heart is sinking what to do. My beloved.

He got 65 years old. Then he also got no help. Nobody replied to this. That's Fudge. My beloved blocked me from her Twitter group. This next one. Humiliation porn. If I stop humiliation porn to normal porn, I get severe anxiety and depression.

And then just a bunch of elipsies. Don't stop, I guess. I used that excuse before. Yeah, okay. Because I don't watch this kind of porn, I get anxiety and depression. If I don't go to the website that has a URL that is 40 characters long. This next one. Please reply on this.

I want to see a porn video, but I'm thinking, what if in future my kids marry a porn star? Many girls do sex on porn videos. So chances are if my kids marry a porn star, a girl who I saw nude become my daughter-in-law, how does my son will feel and how my daughter-in-law will feel about it? So what are your views? Should I watch porn or not if you were in my position?

I would. If I were in your position, I would. Yeah. Yeah. This is the, it's a small world argument. Yeah. He's also,

what he's, he's afraid of like the best possible situation. Yeah, knowing a porn star and being able to. Yeah, that's probably what he's jacking off to is this idea. This is Indian only fans. Yeah. Someone,

someone that lives across the street from me is in 11 porn videos. This guy, this guy was trying to write, just trying to write as many questions as possible. This is a guy writing a worksheet for a class. It's like, okay, well,

how will I feel? And also how will my son feel? And I guess how old my daughter-in-law feel, too? And what are your views? It's one question per question, I would say. Yeah, this next one. Sir, ma'am, please help me. Sir, I saw this today, and I'm worried it suddenly appears.

Is it normal, sir? I'm so worried, please help me. None of these have photos. They never have photos in there. I wonder if the doctor on the back end can see the photos that are being attached. Maybe. This photo is of a ghost. Yeah.

This next one here. Is this normal? Is it okay at that age? And I'm not sure if we've seen this one before. When I was younger around 10 or 9, my brother was around 9 as well. We both had seen porn and we decided to try slash have sex by rubbing and putting our penis on each other's butt, bottoms and anus. It lasted about 10 minutes. And we hadn't really started puberty at that age, so we weren't sexually active.

And we didn't want any, we didn't have any orgasm. like that. It basically just rubbing our penises on our bottoms and penis. We are not gay. We have never done it again. And I'm just wondering if this is normal or okay at that age, if this is incest or not.

And I'm worried that we've seen this one before because he asked this a million times the same exact way. Okay. So if you're worried if this is incest or not, it's not. If you're the same age, I think it's just not incest no matter what.

No, no, no. It's fine. And also, you're not, you're just rubbing. Yeah, there's no orgasm, or you're not sexually accurate. This is funny game. You're not even pubic yet. Half of the games that boys play are lick something off my ass, something off my cock.

The interesting thing about this one, if you go, if you go back here, if you go back, again, the, if you go back again, oh, sorry. He thought, GBO was the charge of letters. No, no, I just said. It's asked for male 15 years, which I feel like you're, supposed to realize this question when you're like 30

yeah there's a problem you're supposed to yeah he's been thinking about it for a long yeah he needs it's too fresh he's like his brother

keeps bringing it up too much this is the kind of thing that you say one time at a bar when everybody's crazy stories it was so funny me and my brother

we would rub our penises against each other's bottom slash anus you're not supposed to be posting out on a website when we were 10 or 9 two beers deep you start using slashes

in your phone please help sir please Sir, are you there? Help, help, help. Look at my picture. The bartender is just cleaning a glass. Last call. Hello, sir. I would really like a beer to help with my problem of memories.

I'm 13 years old. Hello, sir. I'm 15 years old. I'm just playing brother game with rubbing boners. I'm just playing an anus game with my favorite brother when we were nine or 10. How many cubit hairs did you have less than three? Okay. If you have less than three pubic hairs, it is fine. Engineer and model actress are in love.

What should we do in order to both have peaceful married life? How to protect from public and have freedom is to outside India. Is that correct? I don't know. Reframe your question for better. It is so rare that they say I have no fucking idea what you're talking about. I swear. I saw, there was a couple of ones.

I didn't include them. There was a couple of ones that I saw that were just like, just a, posting to the practo thing to doctors you can't middle finger the swear jar that is no so he's making a mockery of it

I saw a lot of posts that were just like hello doctor I am perfectly healthy and I feel amazing and then the doctor would just reply and go that's great to hear

that's very good news yeah sharing food with gay guy make you gay recently I've shared food with the same spoon of the person which they ate who is gay. Now I'm afraid. Who is a gay

now. Gainness is contagious. Today I shared a cigarette with a gay and now I'm afraid that his saliva might have swallowed by me. Can anyone tell me this gayness is contagious when the saliva is swallowed? Does kissing gay make you gay? The other day I was drunk and kissed a gay

thinking that she is a girl. We kissed like more than an hour, a deep lip kiss. After realizing that is gay, I'm afraid since we had a lip kiss, saliva is transferred to my mouth. Is there any possibility that saliva affect my manhood? Can anyone tell? No.

This is wrong. I would like to say yes, yes, and yes. You can catch gay. If you get gay saliva in your mouth, it will turn to sharing a spoon. Sharing a spoon will make you gay. It's all very, very contagious. And it's not okay. And it's not even if you're gay, it's not okay to

become gay in that way. Exactly. That is like, yeah. That's like we're born. It makes a vampire. And the vampire is like a lesser vampire. You should be born that way. I don't want you being turned.

You shouldn't be a thrall. No, no, no. Unfortunately, Indian doctors understand you're either born gay or someone makes you gay with a kiss.

This next one here, I hit with gun bullet. My son's eye was hit by a bullet. It's painting and red also from the corner. Can someone please advise me the next course of action?

Shot in the face and it's painting. I think the response to this was like, can you please give me? more information. Face turned red. Shot in the face. Fisturned red.

This next one, Schizophrenic child. Is schizophrenia an excuse for a 12-year-old to cuss an adult out of throastom? He has told. This only happens

when he is told to get off the internet off video games and when I'm stuck. All right, this is a very complicit. I hate to both sides this situation.

Once I heard the second part of this and why he's cussing, I feel a little bit more. completely understand why. That would make me schizophrenic as well. Here's what I'll say. It's okay to throw stuff.

It's okay to refuse to do as you're told. Cussing is never okay. Punch your mom. You can punch your mom. You can break down the wall of your house. Oh, yeah.

But just don't you don't call her a harlot. Keep your mouth shut. Don't say H. Or you say something kind. Say, I'm so happy I get to do this. And by the way, I'm so happy. You can punch your wall and say, I love this.

I love this. That's fine. That's fine. But you also cannot cuss even if you're speaking in a different language. Yeah. I'd like to say that. So no, I carumba.

These are the two, these two are kind of the same. Movie during pregnancy. Is it okay to watch movies in the theater during 31 to 32 weeks of pregnancy? It's fine. Or it's safe. Is it safe for my baby to watch a movie

in the 35th week of pregnancy? It's fine. I love that this. It's like a recurrent thing. That's so confusing. Well, specifically pregnancy and can I watch? Can I watch an action movie? There was one that was like,

can I watch funny movie? I saw one that was like, can I use an iPad near my baby? And the doctor was like, no. Do not put that near the baby. This next one. Kids see ball and fan rotating video. Oh, bell and fan. Hi, all. Please help me to understand. My kid always like to watch fan rotation, all bell videos, and like to play with

wheels of cycle, car. Please help me to understand. Is it a good sign or anything needed to make him correct? He eats very less quantity. Thank you. Just feed him more. Feed him more and stop letting him watch a bell in the fan. It's so funny. What is my infant thinking when I give him video? Also, Bellin fan.

I don't know what that is. I don't know what a bell in a fan is. Oh, I guess this is a phrase or a turn of phrase. Why is this one in a different font? I don't know, but time to cut the pumpkin tree. What invent? After eight days suffering my left hand, but homeopathy doctor C, ointment. ointment ointment

demikin ocee and Madison but not removed please help me I share this picture it's time to cut the pumpkin tree recently after 10 days it's time to cut the pumpkin tree what is the same what is time to cut the

I don't know recently after 10 days yeah it's time I guess he has a pumpkin tree yeah he's getting a rash he's getting a rash and he's in pain because he keeps trying to got this pumpkin tree.

You're allergic to the pumpkin tree. This next one. For my wife, pregnancy. Can she got pregnancy by manually inserting my sperm in her vagina? Chances are there are not. Please explain.

I'm suffering. My dog died. I'm crying very much. I feel so helpless. Will I be excused in class if I say this? I'm already in college and I don't think my professors

will understand me. And this got a response from a doctor saying, why are you expecting someone to understand you, the situation soon and involved in study. Wow. I like her picture. Yeah. She's actually beautiful. Yeah. She looks like potion seller. A lot.

Pain coming up from right center chest. I randomly have a pain that I call it Dorito attack. As it feels like a ship scraping my insides. But instead of going down, it comes up. I've had that before.

I know exactly what a Dorito attack. I know what a Dorito attack. Okay, not to go practo, but this is called an esophageal spasm when the food gets stuck right before it hits your... No, it's not. It's called the Dorito. It's a Dorito attack. It will be for now on it will be a Dorito attack. That's too funny. It is the Dorito attack. And then I think this is maybe my last one or my second to last one. My wife had Chinese garlic noodles. My wife had Chinese garlic noodles. Now she is six weeks pregnant. I am worried. Please suggest me. I need to know so. Does he mean that he thinks that it got her pregnant?

I think so. I think the Chinese garlic. This is the same thing as, yeah, am I allowed to drink Gatorade while I'm pregnant? Am I allowed to laugh at a funny picture while I'm pregnant? I read this as his wife ate garlic noodles and actually six weeks pregnant. Oh, and then I am fine, nothing problem. That's just another one of these.

I'm fleeing good and better than before, so thanks to God and then you. Yeah, that's my last one. Damn, dude. Take care. See you, Bay. All right. See you, baby. Congrats.

Wow, dude. Beautiful practo. All right, let's see here. Here's mine. Gaming addiction. Becoming violent, depressed, and anger after not playing video game for four months. I saw this.

Yeah, I feel this. Four months. Four months, you're past the hump. I was like, I saw this and I was like, I really thought to myself, I was like, if I, I feel like that is the point where you'd have to accept it. Yeah, dude.

Like, it's crazy to be going crazy after four months. Something must have just. came out 17. Oh, no, this is you 17 years old. I bet his friends are talking about it. That's probably what it is. Can you click back on it? Thanks. Watching adult video, we already saw this one. Eight pizza after four minutes of milk. I ate pizza after four minutes of drinking milk today by mistake. Is it harmful? Dude, when people... This one, I was lying in bed last night trying to fall asleep and laughing about remembering four minutes of milk. That's so. So much.

If it's, that's non-stop. That's gallons. Just gulping and breathing loud through your nose. I ate pizza after four minutes of drinking milk by mistake. This is how my girlfriend talks all the time. She, like, doesn't do a thing to, or does something wrong. And she says, it was an accident. I'm like, what do you mean?

How did that, how was it an accident that you didn't brush your teeth? Four minutes of milk. Give me some idea. had a problem on penis. Something dry, white, color of sphere. Cover my penis with bad smell. I don't understand what happens on me. So please give me some idea about this type of problem.

I'm suffering from this. You search sphere. No, I actually did it. It is fun watching everybody slides and guessing what they search. You searched type of problem. No, I think this was one of the ones where I searched something else and did it like did something that was similar. I don't think I actually searched any.

Okay, dry white color of sphere. Yeah. Let's try to actually diagnose this guy. I think you have a marble. I think he has a marble stuck on the top of his penis. It has a bad smell, so it might be a stinky marl. It might be something that they eat there. Yeah, maybe an egg.

Sir, I have a white... Oh, no, I searched idea. That's what it was. I just remembered. I have a white orb that smells bad. Maybe you have a stinky white orb. Yeah, that's my official diagnosis. Does it come off?

Okay. Okay, that comes off. You have an orb that comes off. I have a removable problem. What should I do? You should take it off. Obsession with idea of dirtying hands. My son, 31 years, has developed a severe problem about eating with hands.

He worries of washing his hands or otherwise his phone or computer will be spoiled. He gets so much agitated that he wants to commit suicide. We are Indian. and he does not like others eating with hands and considers Chinese better. I just like my son 31 year guy because I completely blindsided me. I thought this was going to be like a problem

that they're like young child had. Right. No, it's just a guy with, fuck it with the OCD. Well, you did say it. It's a guy with OCD who has OCD that makes him consider Chinese better. Right. I think that's kind of what OCD is.

Yeah. That is just not working. Can you... Oh, thank you. I got spotted. Eye number. Can I reduce... Can I reduce eye number?

How, if any idea of you, please say no other problem? This has been something you... You can go one or zero. This is something Cameron's been asking us about for weeks. Oh, yeah. Could he get an iPad? Can I reduce Eye Number? Cameron, I've never seen it put so eloquently, though, because you've been asking, can I get an iPatch, blah, blah, blah, blah.

This is this boils... I don't want an iPatch. This boils down your question, too. It's essential. Yeah. Can I reduce eye number? Pizza sauce poo. This morning I had a bowel movement where I had pizza sauce like colored poo. Oh my God.

It was running. I had only gone an hour before it was normal. And I did what this could be? Should I go see a doctor? I saw this one too. Yeah. Yeah. Did you see a doctor?

Did you put it on a pizza? I also saw this one and immediately, immediately I was just like, someone else. I can't put that. Pizza sauce poo is a people selling. You also, you know that it is a, men often do just have pizza sauce poos. The fact that this is a female, I would say

this person is like seconds from death. Yes. There's no, when women have bad poops, it's not right. I can't think of as pizza sauce consistency would be one thing, but this is pizza sauce colored poo. Which which makes a question, is bright red? Is it pizza sauce

uncooked or cooked? Because it changes, it becomes a little bit more brown when you cook it. They have a, They probably have, like, stomach cancer or something. Yeah. Or they have... Or pizza sauce. They ate two full bottles of ragu.

Four minutes of pizza sauce. Maybe your toilet has pizza sauce in it. Maybe you have a red toilet. Somebody hit you with an upper decker. They put a bunch of pizza sauce on the top. Pizza with Gerd. Hi, I am having Gerd. Hi, having Gerd from last 10 days.

Head steel still feels heavy. I really, really, really want to eat a pizza should I? What is GERG? Yes. Yes, you can. Yes, eat.

It's a really bad reflux. Gastrosophical reflux does it? Yeah. Oh, I really, really, really want to eat a pizza. It shouldn't be eaten. Unfortunately, unfortunately feeling gay. I don't want to be gay

feeling to kiss or do something to male when I am man from past four to five months. How to be straight only liking, attracting towards female. I am single previously. Did bad. to myself, masturbated,

please help. I did bad to myself. I would say if you've did bad to yourself, you're too far gone. There's nothing we can do for you. I was like, unfortunately,

I am gay. Insect bite. It seems like a scratch when I wake up in morning and check, but it's not actually a scratch. It's something creepy and it's making me itchy.

It's a creepy, mysterious, creepy thing. It's a creepy itchy thing. I have a creepy itchy thingy that's happening. I have a creepy dot on my hand. Dreaming, imagining.

When I am recumbency on the bed and I am traveling in the metro in a car, I always dream, just like I want to be something. I keep imagining and want to be many things I am, and it is different. For example, if I want to go to film writing, I have a fantasy. I have become, and I keep on reacting and being happy.

It feels good. Then, after five minutes, I ignore to become an actor, a cricketer, or an officer in the same way. It's so funny that he's like, all right, so I want to be maybe four or five things, but then I snap back to reality, and I want to be four or five.

On the train, I imagine being an actor. You have to consult the psychiatrist. You need to see a doctor right now. We need to pump you full of lithium. You can't have those thoughts anymore. Yeah, those are dangerous thoughts. Yeah. I'm going to put you in a straight jacket.

I'll read this one really fast. Daydreamier, masturbator, lazy. I'm a malabaptive daydreamer. I daydream a lot like I was a number one scientist in the world, and I saved millions of lives. Everyone in the world praises me and all types of fantasies I feel like everyone praising me

I'm really wasting a lot of time when I daydream especially when I hear music I daydream a lot I am a serious masturbator I masturbate three time a day yeah you read it right I can't control myself

I am lazy king I am procrastinating I read tons of self-help books and watch tons of motivational videos and speeches and blogs but still I am not doing anything my mind is wandering I can't focus even for five minutes

I feel suicidal sometimes I'm a double-minded person now I am in a relationship double mind system act here too I'm attracted to every girl I saw I am in a serious depression. I will cry without any reason over one hour a day. My day is like three times masturbation.

Don't taking shower, except I felt so smelly 15 times daydreaming. Like saving poor, help me. Holy shoot. That's what the doctor says. Holy shoot. Okay. You need to get out of my eyes. You need to get that out.

Diarrhea for birds. My birds look suffering from diarrhea. I need to know about medication. Go follow and treat. Need suggestions. Okay. Asked from a male zero here. It's not about me.

It's about a bird. So let's get it. Also, the bird is probably under one. The bird is probably only months old. Angular ceilings. I have angular ceilings on both sides. What medicine or should cream should I take or apply? Please advise.

Maybe like a light paint. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It'll expand the room a little bit. Yeah. Some kind of off white. Yeah.

Like a cream. Maybe. Leg injury by gun shoot. After injury, my foot is drooped down and my foot thumb is not moving. Let's go, dude. My foot foot. I can't wait for you guys to hear more about foot thumb. My foot thumb.

Confusion. Am I sick or just pretending? Is my identity even real? How do I know how to act? Because I am confused, I don't know what to feel or if what I'm thinking of is real. I don't know anything. I do like the questions that are on here. Yeah, I like the questions that are on here that, like, sound like, when, like, a middle schooler tries to write, like, a schizophrenic guy.

Yeah, this is a story from the perspective of Rorschach. I'm writing a Rorschach spin-off. Everything is so weird. This city is a fetid pool of strangeness. I can't move my foot thumb. Is my identity real? I'm like an inkbox. Everything is so confusing.

It's looking for a criminal. I spree performed on my clothes and I don't. I spree performed on my cloth and hand. And father that I eat without washing my hand, I touch my cloth and perform smell was killing my hands. Oh, Jesus. Perform smell. We all know performance smell.

And fathers that I eat without washing my hand, I touch my cloth. Without just nailing one word like, oh, sorry, let me start over. It was my father that I eat without washing. Jerk slash flicks. I wanted to know if there's a permanent best treatment for problem of jerk or flicks.

Medicines are going on. Medicines are going on. Addiction of porn. I know this is funny question. Why is my body struggling throughout the day to poop? But when I watch porn, I poop a lot and very quickly. I know this may sound weird to many, but hopefully I get a lot of people that are alike

that I can discuss this nasty thing to talk about. I want to get rid of this problem. Now I am addicted to porn before poop. And if things will go like this, then what will happen at the age of 50? Please suggest me. He's just on his phone. I'm like, I'm like the bus. Yeah, wait, why are you trying to shit on the bus?

Like a bus. Sometimes they have a toilet on the bus. Yeah, like the lucky star bus. But why not just be on the toilet? He has to watch porn before he's just in his seat. He's like, I feel like I got a poop at some point. He basically got the diaper equivalent of porn. tongue-licking spoon in a restaurant

my mistakely in a restaurant I was having noodle with spoon that I mistakenly tongue-licked the spoon should I be worried Yes You need to go to the hospital right now My mistakenly in her restaurant We must amputate your tongue

Penis erection of my hubby My hubby's penis is not able to being erect For a long time due to which he is not satisfied During mating with me So suggest some ideas for being satisfied I hate when my hubby's having problems that's mating with me. Maybe try doing this with a ball sack, you idiot?

I want to mate. Oh no, there's a problem. Awkward speam release. I release sperm when I'm at a tense situation. Speem is such a good search. Most especially, for example, when I've not done enough writing in an examination, the examiner calls for submission of scripts are about to collect. I release sperm uncontrollably due to the tension.

It has reoccurred severally, even without me having, without me been on erection. Very pleasurable. Awkward, though. Whenever I check it, I notice it's sperm, which always get me thinking. So I have an issue? Wait. Okay.

Wait, look at the timing of this five years ago. What was happening five years ago? Who was on Saturday Night Live? Three guys. The Lonely Island. And they were one day looking for inspiration for a new digital show. And they searched speam, and they said,

we can't do speam. It can't be awkward, speme, release. Because anybody's going to Google that and know where it came from. We're going to invent a little word called Jiz. Yep. and wow so that's my theory sperm dribble instead of shoot I'm a boring dribbler

but I can shoot two ropes if I lie down I'm a born dribbler I'm a born dribbler I'm a born dribbler speam count 10 million that's pretty good right yeah 10 million well this person was unhappy with it and I have one more that I know

we did at the live show but this is my favorite one of all time so I just wanted to put it again I want to see it again it's the classic bubble inside my mom Sir, I have one big bubble in my bump. The bubble is inside the bump. Please suggest me medicine so that I get relief from that bubble.

You keep thinking the best part is over. By the end, it's that bubble. The bubble is inside the bump. It starts with sir. It's very formal. Sir, I have one big bubble. In my bump. That bubble, you're already like, what? In a bump.

The bubble, he specifies. You're starting to say, wait, what's the situation? He says, the bubble is inside the bump. Please suggest me medicine so I get relief from the bubble. So now we know the problem is not the bump. No, it's the problem is the bubble. I'm going to have that bump whether you like the bump. This is hard with the bump. I mean, I got used to the bump. I'm fine with the bump. I'm a bumper, but I don't need a bubble inside it. That's the last thing I need. Wait. That was actually the lonely island song. Bubble in my bump. I'm on a bump. I'm on a bump. And,

It's got a bubble. I'm in, it's a... I need a medicine. Like a bump. I'm experiencing T-Pay from the bubble in my... Like a boss was originally in my bump. And it's all about bubbles. In my bum.

Talk to doctor. Like a bump. All right. I have to pee so bad. That's okay. We'll go through fastly. Okay, do we can pause? Is that okay?

Can I get relief from my bubble? Yeah, go take your bubble out. Sorry, Cam. Bubble in my bump. Can't see a bubble in my bomb when we tried. You put down the bubble and I look at my bump. Bobbling. Bubble in my bump, bum, bum, bubble.

All right. That's pretty funny. All right. Bobble in my bump. And we are back. Roershack. All right. Here's Practo.

I want small peonic. Hi, I'm 14-year-old. my pinnick is long. When my panics up, my panic is show-on pants. I want small panics. What I do for it. Wait, this is a pretty good problem to have, Mr. 14 years old. That's what every doctor said.

Grown men want this problem. Yeah. You know who wrote that? John Hamm. Oh, probably. John Ham, born on a leap here. Does John Hamm have long him? John Hamm's got a long ham.

You don't know this? John Hamm used to, when he would walker at hands bigger. Times Square. Yes, exactly. He would walk around with cloth pants on. He invented the gray sweatpants challenge.

For real. He would do it in the streets of Beverly Hills. That wasn't madman. He used to be called Hamming it up. You said cloth pants? Yes.

Aren't all cloth pants? No, because sometimes pants are leather. They can be synthetically. I thought you were just saying clock pants. Shut up. Clock pants because he's got a,

he's got a minute hand down there. Yeah. Nope. Come on. I think the second hand's a little longer than the minute hand. The second hand's too thin. Meaty lump

My sister has a meaty lump on her anus She's strained while pooping Which doctor should we show What is this? Meaty. You're really like, you hold it I'm holding her meaty lump Which doctor should we show?

Should I let go? Should I let go of it? What is this? Cement color spatches On glan of penis Actually I had an itching on my Glam of Pennis from the last two of days. Then I observed cement color spaches on glan of penis.

How to cure this. Sharpie. Actually, I love starting it with actually. Actually, sir. Do you search actually? Actually, sir. Do you search actually? Uh-huh.

Wow. That was advanced. Brain warm. I swollen a live baby cockroach. Am I at risk of brain warm or tap warm? Should I take albasinol or albenazole? Please help. please consult an eye specialist in your area.

The doctor's response so that you can start wearing glasses and don't swallow a live baby cockroach repeatedly. That is kind of a... Oh, I swallowed a cockroach. What do I do? See, eye doctor, so you don't swallow a cockroach.

Yeah. Talk to him, Dr. S.K. Wadhwa. Yeah, I'm a gynaecologist. You have a gynaecologist with 44 years of experience and luck now. But I'm weighing in on everything. Why don't you see an eye doctor? Because I'm a guy doctor.

You know you messed up when a gynecologist is telling you. Just roasting you. Yeah. Tell you stuff about your eye. Yeah. Oh, get your eyes checked. Something bite me. Can anyone guess what bite me?

There are two pimple together? No other symptoms now. It had been 15 minutes. Okay. I will guess. There's two together. It was a spider. It was a spider.

I think it also could have been two best-friend mosquitoes. They don't have friendships. Maybe it was one clumsy mosquito who fucked up the... May. Oh, me. Oh, me. Teak, teak. No.

Nice. Can anyone guess what bite me? That's what I like about that. Or two very, very small Native American. I did. I searched bite and there was a bunch of stuff like, I got bit by a dog. I got bit by a... The dog ones are sad.

There's a ton of... I got bit by a crow. Yeah. I searched eagle. There's some meat. Eagle bites. But the one, there was one nested in all those that was like, my son was bitten by a human. I tried searching, you cannot search more than one word, which is such a shame.

You can. Well, it doesn't work, though. It doesn't work, though. I search grandma bite. I really want a grandma to get bit or be bit by grandma. Yeah. All right, purple legs. My thighs turned purple last night.

And now they are lighter, but still purple. You are turning into a mascot. Yeah. This is good. Yeah. Yeah, that's telly. All right. I love this one.

It's literally so charmed. relationship during pregnancy. I am seven-week pregnant, advised by doctors to avoid making relationships for three months, and fine to avoid it completely, but sometimes my husband was in mood and we do kissing only, but I get feelings while smooch.

Can kissing and my feelings can harm baby? Please advise. Yes, that is very sweet. It is very harmful. You got to stop that right. Right now, your baby will die. You stop kissing your husband right now because then your baby's going to want to grow up

to kiss your husband. You will make your baby gay for your own or his own father. How can the language break down in such a big country with so many languages

be so poor that when a doctor says avoid relations you think you can't smooch your husband like you don't understand the sexual euphemism it's like they're like

they need to just stop trying to incorporate English politeness. Yeah speak the language that you guys all know really really well when you're at the doctor. Right.

Yeah. Don't say that you have a spatch on your pants. Yeah. to cut the bubble on palm I have bubble on palm now I request you to cut the bubble he died

he died at the end he cut the bubble and that happened actually I'll just cut it myself I just love the English language arts things here I have a bubble now request you cut Puss bubble Hi madam

Puss bubble Hi madam Puss bubble not reduced Can I puncher that bubble, which a sterilized pin? Can I puncher that? Can I puncher that bubble? Can I puncher that? Sterellas pin, because it was creating a lot of inconvenience.

Hi, I got a heatball on my pens. How? Hi, I got a heatball on my pants. How to cure it? I'm imagining like a, like a, a heatball of my pants. I'm imagining like a, like a Hedukin. I'm imagining, I'm imagining, like a, like a Miami Heat Basketball, like one with the logo on it. It's like, oh, no.

I like how many people type their, like, phonetic reaction to whatever. Here's what it feels like. Pain on leg finger. Dear Doc, I do have severe pain on my leg finger, and it bludged as soon as it's shown in the pig. Suggest me which specialist to contact. My leg finger ringworm. My leg finger side worm or ringworm. Happen, please.

Help me. Which cream do I have to use? I wear shoes. Two thumb finger and two leg neckle swelling. Legneckel. Two thumb finger and two leg neckle swelling. Kindly guide me. ASDF, ASDM.

So yes, they do not have a word for toe, apparently. So it's either a foot thumb or like. leg leg, left leg, big finger got puss. Hi, doctors. Good for you. And in my 32nd wing for pregnancy, my left thumb, jeez, my left leg thumb finger, that is big finger. My left leg thumb finger, that is big finger. God, puss in pain when touched, but while walking, no discomfort, what could I do to get rid of it, ASAP?

Cut it off. balloon on footfinger. I accidentally hit my foot finger with stairs. And a green balloon formed up on it. I'll attach a photo. Balloon on footfinger. I accidentally tripped while climbing stairs. And my finger fell on the edge of the stair.

And then it swell like a balloon with green color. This person is so excited to have this. No, just foot finger. Leg finger will be automatically clutch. Left leg finger will be 10 days before damaging. The whole leg will be crushed. The whole body. It will waste my mother leg.

My mother leg. And then this was the only one that had really good advice, which was, I do not understand the problem from a diabetesologist. I do not understand. My leg finger. My left leg thumb finger that is big finger. His big finger got a green. Yeah, we need to teach them toe.

Yeah, my toe is green. That's what it should be. Okay, how do I explain this? My left leg thumb finger got smashed on the stair, mother finger, whole leg fall off. What is it? I threw my, I threw stairs. I hit my, I hit it with stairs. Peanick problem and sex problem.

My penic is very short in slime. And big problem is hot video watching Thruly running hormone and painting my penis. What size is on full tight? That basically, yeah, how big is your talk? How big that thing? Taking pen and mouth. My mistakenly, I put pen in my mouth. Should I be worried?

I will never do it again. No worries. Don't worry. You can do it again. This is your pen. Please be sure not to share your pen with anyone if you have this habit. Just wash your mouth.

And finally, don't wash the pen. Don't watch the pen, wash your mouth. Finally, the best advice. No, don't repeat it. A lot of, I love when there's seven different responses. It's so good. This is your pen is really good. Don't worry.

You can do it again. It's your pen. Why are you to worry? So this is me searching actually. It's my big finale. I'm just going to read them. Actually, I am having hairfall. Actually, I got frontal baldness.

Actually, there is a skin problem. Actually, I take oral sex to old man. Actually, I don't know what it is. Actually, I have two cutting scar. Actually, I am having erectile dysfunction. Actually, I have striked with a coconut. Actually, I am facing pain in my penis. Actually, I add acne and pimples.

Actually, I want to loose my bolly. Sir, actually, I have sex with my wife. I love searching, actually. Wow. Practo. Incredible. Practo. That's practo for you.

All right. Right. I hope that we cured. This stuff is like smoking crack, though. Wow. Yeah. I hope that we cured all of their diseases. I know that we did. Every single one of these people's problems are resolved today. That's very sweet.

Yeah. We have a shareholder meeting on the 28th of March. This week, next week? Next week. We'll find out what it is when we look at the calendar. It's next week. And Pierce, plug your ish. What, do you have any ish that you want to plug?

Nothing at the moment Then go watch Fright at the museum Fright at the museum All the new viewers Pierce's favorite Pierce's thing that he made

that is his thing that he's plugging There's nothing to do with us A cool video that you guys Help me make Yeah And then The Matrix PowerPoint

Check out Matrix Powerpoint And Dinosauron or Quint On Reddit Actually just check out Matrix PowerPoint Yeah we need to juice that video Yeah it does need to get

It's been stuck It's stuck in time. Yeah, we need to get it back up. Yeah. Let's post it on subredits. Yeah. Yeah. And you know what?

You go and you post it on not Tim and Eric. Everybody go post that on not Tim and Eric. Yep. Matrix PowerPoints on not. Crenge high schooler gives stupid presentation. Yeah. All right. Bye guys.

Peace guys. Bye. Yeah, I'd like to get one to get to a page 18-13 movie plays. And I'd like to say in the front. row. And I take it to a page of 13. Yeah. One ticket to a page and then I hit you. I hate you because you're in my trench coat. I like hit your fish. Trump. Oh my God, I swear, Char. Yeah, that's fine. One. One ticket to welcome to most part. I'd like to go. One ticket to welcome to Marwin, please.

Boy in the Stripe Pajamas, please. One ticket to... I like one ticket to melancholia, please. Yes, please. Um, uh, excuse me. Hello. Um, can I get three... I mean, uh, one ticket to, uh, Philomena.

Yeah, one ticket to Leon the professional. I'd like to get one ticket to Leon, the professional. Um, yeah. Uh, um, my mom, my mom said that I can, And my mama said that I can buy Sunset Overdrive. I have one DVD copy of History of Violence, please. Do you have a Blu-Rae of Brown Bunny? Brown Bunny on Blu-ray.

That's what I want. Yeah. And Mono Warfare, too. All right, turn it off. That's enough of that. That is funny though.