Podcast About List - Ep. 264 - The Five Weeks of Planets: Mercury

Episode Date: November 1, 2023

If you didn't tune in to the last premium episode on our Patreon, we have decided to take on a planetary journey for the next ten episodes where we visit every single planet in the Milky Way. This is Mercury. Watch the full video for this episode youtube.com/@PodcastAboutList Buy tickets to our latest live show https://www.swagpoop.com/shows Get extra premium and Gun City RPG episodes at https://www.patreon.com/podcastaboutlist Follow us https://www.swagpoop.com/links

Okay. Are you guys, are you all seeing this? I'm listening to your stream, mate. Mercury. I'm going to fly to you. Mercury. Imagine me and you. Mercury. I'm going to fly to you. Mercury. Mercury, Mercury smallest planet I don't know you can't hit your head for a clap

Guys Showing up on the thing Welcome to the five weeks of planets We said we were going to do it I'm sick as a dog And we're still powering through to do it Uh-huh We could have you guys could have told you guys

get a guest. Go get Brett Gellman this week, man. My favorite comic. Yeah, go get Brett, man. Because I am sick as a dog, but I said, no, man. The people need to see these planets. We can't delay this any further.

Also, we're lining up the five weeks of planets with the Five Nights at Freddy's movie. Yeah. It's kind of a tie-in. Kind of a movie tie-in. Five-type of universe. I mean, yeah, there's no better time to get started on a 10-episode spectacular series than now.

And just for everybody who didn't... Everybody who wasn't, so anybody who didn't listen to the last premium episode is probably a little bewildered right now, and you deserve to be if you're not listening to the premium episodes. But basically, Patrick dressed as an Earth by accident on last episode. So we decided to do 10 weeks of planets. And yes, Patrick's already done five weeks, tied episodes of planets. Tiny episodes. And that will span every episode we do for five weeks.

So today, everybody is Mercury. And then after Mercury, it will be Venus. Then we're skipping Earth because you already did it. And then it's Mars. Well, we're on Earth every day. Exactly. So, you know, every episode's an Earth episode. Neptune.

We're not going to say it funny. I forgot Saturn, I think. Did I say Saturn? No, you didn't. Saturn's in there for sure. Pluto, the sun and the moon. Wow. All 10 planets.

The Sun and the Moon debate. Which one's better? I don't even, we can't even get there. yet guys. This week it's Mercury if you can't, I mean, I don't have to tell you that. Again, again, again, regardless, irregardless, Brett Gelman, open invite. If you want to show up in the five weeks of planets, you would make a great, he would make a great Saturn. He would make a great Jupiter with his, with his, yeah, well, Saturn, actually, that's a good point with the ring. The ring around the head. I'd love to see him tackle Uranus. And I'd love to see something impact him and destroy him. him into millions of pieces. Guys, look at, we all dressed up as Mercury for this episode, just like Patrick did accidentally. And so Patrick, I guess I forgot to mention, that's the most important part of the five weeks of planets is every episode we will be dressing us.

Basically the outfits. I was trying to get the light going because I don't have my ring light, so you can't really see the full. It's kind of, my webcam is pretty bad. But look, I've got a gray, I've got a gray, Dickie's work shirt on. And as well as gray pants, I have dark gray pants with a dark gray shirt. And then the white is supposed to represent, I guess, the atmosphere or something on the dust. You're making excuses, man.

It sounds to me like you didn't think this through. The white is. What is the black and orange hat? It says that Mercury has an extremely tenuous atmosphere. It barely has an atmosphere at all. Cameron, why don't you shut up, let alone a white one? Cameron, why don't you shut up? Seems like someone just didn't put much effort in on the first day.

Wait, wait, wait, wait. So now you accidentally dressed exactly like Earth the other day. Wait, wait. What, bitch? The black on the hat is representative of the blackness of space. And the orange on the hat is representative of our big orange sun. So you dressed as the solar system and not mercury? No.

You had the sun into your Mercury costume. No, man. The sun was on my Earth costume. It's not going to fly, unlike Mercury, which flies very fast. It's the speedy planet. The Sun was on the 88 Earth base. I know in that one, but that was not on purpose. You accidentally dressed like Earth and the sun.

It's the same thing. You had ample warning. Honestly, it would have been fine if it wasn't, it didn't try to say that the white shirt was the atmosphere. Yeah, that was the white shirt. It just fell off, man. You fell off there. No, the white shirt is represented. The white shirt, there's white all over Mercury.

There's little white dots. He Googled the word Mercury. I'm looking at a picture of Mercury right now. Okay, so here's how you handle that, man. Look at my hat, motherfucker. Look at my swirling hat. That is beautiful, Caleb. It's almost a Mercury.

It's a Mercury themed outfit. All right, we're going to... For tones of Mercury, I have a gray shirt. I have a dark gray apron that I... have that I cook in sometimes and I also used to do the dishes guys. That is a green apron. You brought

what are you talking about? I'm not stupid. Are you fucking stupid? Get off Wikipedia, bro. You're scrolling down the Mercury Wikipedia. The hell is right? You think this is green? Maybe you're reading it. Let Caleb do his outfit. I forgot you can see my screen.

Fucking Sharing his screen of him scrolling down the Mercury Wikipedia page. Really, really fast. I was trying to look for the word white. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

The white here is supposed to be representative of Beppi Colombo. What's that? Well, Beppe Colombo is a joint mission of European Space Agency and the ESA and the Jaxa, the Japanese aerospace exploration agency. And the white is supposed to represent Beppi Colombo's shell. I just don't, I don't think so. Okay, we did my outfit, we did Patrick's outfit. Cameron, walk us through this fit, man.

Okay, so first of all, we've got the obvious element, which is I put some tinfoil on top of my head. Oh, yeah. And what this represents is, this is, as, first of all, it's gray, like Mercury the Planet, but we also know that Mercury also gives its name to a peculiar type of liquid metal that is quite shiny and metallic in appearance.

So that's the element that's going on up here. You're telling me you have Mercury sitting on your head, Liquid Mercury? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. You know, it's insanely toxicly dangerous. Yeah. That's what happened to the Mad Hatters. I don't care much about that. I'm more interested in the planet. I'm not afraid to die for my costume. I like that. So what I have here on my top or upper half is this is a gray sweater to represent the gray color of mercury. And then I also have a gray shirt, which here, let me see. You put layers underneath that we can. Just wait, but this is a full body out. This is a full body outfit here.

Wait, wait, don't tell me. Okay, so I've got the gray, the gray sweater, and I've got this gray shirt here, which has gorillas on it, which you might think seems a little bit out of place, but wait, because there's a reason. Now, see, I'm wearing these, oh, this cable's not very long. I'm wearing these pajama pants here, the Boston Bruins. Now, what sport do they, what sport do they play, guys? Hockey.

Hockey. Now, what do you play hockey on? The ground. Ice. And, guys, Mercury's, really. range of temperatures can be very hot. Some would say in excess of tropical temperatures. Oh, my God.

But they also, at night, drop to very low, maybe as cold as an ice rink. Okay, show me your underwear. And my underwear is under my pajama pants. And then this is the last part. I'm wearing these running shoes because Mercury, guys, is the speedy planet. The speedy planet. Oh, my God. And you know what else I have, guys?

What? An envelope. because mercury is the name of the messenger god oh my god wait you popped off man who's the messenger of the gods you popped off and you inspired me in so many different ways now yeah for the other planets that's my mercury costume y'all holy fucking shit what i lack in costume i will make up for in song and you guys i need to debut my new single okay i want to hear my new my new my new single under under my new space wrapping name

OJ the Alien. All right. I want to hear this shit. Okay. Are you guys, are you all seeing this? I'm listening to your stream, mate. I'm going to fly to you. Mercury. Imagine me and you. Mercury, Mercury, smallest planet.

I'm going to take my spaceship and land it. On your surface, it's hard like it's granted. You're a planet we all take for granted. I wrote the song and critics will pan it. I got a wedding and J-Lo will plant it. Mercury, you're my favorite planet. See, I'm doing an alien voice. I hear that.

I'm so around you look like a fine line I put my nut in you like a Clark bar I put my butt on you but I won't fart Who my spaceship here like a bear heart Got my clothes and shoes they from Prime Mark I'm supposed to say fine wine I think I'm aged like an oldest I think I let it like a fine line

I let the Adobe premiere Do the transcription I think that's that I should have double check that Imagine me and you Mercury And you guys There will be a new song by O.J. The Alien Every single episode

No way. Every single planet episode? Every single episode of the five weeks of planets There will be a new OJ the Alien track. I'm more excited than I've ever been. I liked it also. So, you know what's kind of convenient about this?

It is Halloween that we're recording this. Yeah. Well, that's what I was thinking about, yeah. We maybe have come up with the three most psychotic Halloween costumes in all of history. I think if I were to walk outside right now, anybody would be like, oh, nice Mercury costume. Well, yeah, because they'd say. Oh, well, yeah. At first they'd look, it's going to be in like, are you the Bruins play ice hockey?

Mm-hmm. Are they would say, are you the gray guy? Are you Mr. Gray? And I would go like this. And I point to my envelope. And they go, oh. Oh, Mercury. Mercury, the fastest planet.

Mercury, like from the O.J. the Alien song. Yes, exactly. And O.J. The Alien is about to blow the fuck up. I think so. You guys. Yeah, and his spaceship. Uh-huh. When he impact.

I really like the line, put my butt on you, but I won't fart. Because that might be the most romantic shit I've ever heard in my entire life. It's very, it's, see, I was thinking about it, and it's like, what would, okay, so OJ. the alien, what's he up to? what would an alien think is beautiful, right? Uh-huh. And it's probably a cold but also hot gray planet. True.

And I don't know how aliens make love. Right. It's probably in a way that we couldn't even comprehend, like putting their butt on somebody without a bar. Putting their nut inside of it like a Clark bar. When an alien travels to Earth, what the hell is it doing with all its free time in that spaceship? Well, here's my theory now.

They all want to, you know, well, O.J. the alien. I don't know what kind of alien he is, but I mean, he's my creation. He's a green alien. Yeah, you decide. I guess. I think, well, these type of aliens are not, they're the planet fucker race. And they only, they don't like Earth because it's too watery.

It's not cold and gray like a, like a, like alien pussy. It's not cold and gray. so this alien is hella cold and gray is it really big where it can like hold the whole planet and fuck it or is i think that maybe o j the alien has some kind of i don't know we'll see where this character goes well it's there's it's going to be a 10 episode arc and we'll see what type of things that o j the alien gets up to i can't wait to hear about what o j the alien thinks about the sun yeah good luck trying to fuck the sun but i bet he'll fucking love the moon oh my god craters wait maybe maybe maybe Mercury is his main and the moon is his side piece. Damn. You guys, I'm just excited. I'm just excited to think about all this new kind of, this whole thing that we can do with OJ's the alien.

All right. Well, tune in next week for the next episode. The thing is, man, the planet, we've spent, what do we, we've done 300 episodes. And 99% of what we talk about is all this earth shit, man. We are leaving the entire universe out of our vocabulary and the things we're talking about. And this is wrong. I think maybe we've talked about aliens before, but I don't think we've ever really... But we've never talked about these other planets, man.

And beyond this, even our galaxy, there's probably 30 or 40 other galaxies that have 10 planets each. With tons of different things that we could talk about, man. What the hell? Titan? Are you kidding me, Titan? Titan? That's a moon. Titan?

That shit is cool. It is cool to have a moon named Titan. Why have we never talked about Titan before? We're going to get to Titan, man. Let's think about what we can talk about Mercury here. We don't want to jump too far ahead. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, we're getting too excited about all these planets.

Okay. We're going to jump. Here's a fact. I'd like to read a Mercury fact to you guys. Go ahead. If Earth were a nickel, Mercury would be a blueberry. Huh. That doesn't seem

If Earth were a nickel Is this in terms of size? Mercury would be about a blueberry. A nickel and a blueberry are pretty similar in size. They are the same. They are, I have seen, well, these GMO blueberries. Blueberries come in different sizes, man. Mercury is 0.4 astronomical units away from the sun.

How much is an astronomical unit? So, well, it's about 0.4 of the distance from Mercury to the sun. That's what I'm gathering here. Oh, Mercury's highly eccentric egg-shaped orbit. That's interesting. Okay. Egg-shaped. Shaped like an egg.

It's an egg-shaped orbit. And Mercury has no moons, y'all. Yep, I knew that. Can you imagine living on a planet with no moons? I think that... I would like that. No werewolves. True.

Yeah, that's a good point. The threat of werewolves is greatly decreased by not having a moon. 100%. Why do I feel like he is kind of... Humans, like how geese migrate south when it becomes December, humans, when it gets towards the end of October, should migrate to Mercury. To avoid all the wolves. To avoid the werewolves and the wolves.

Yeah. Speaking of a wolf, last night I had, this weekend, this is why I'm sick, partied way too hard, okay? Last night I had myself a completely blue cocktail, almost Neptune. colored. Well, let's get there. Let's talk about that when we get there. Well, but I started walking around and I put all my keys in my hand, and I started saying

I was keyserine, like Wolverine, but with keys. This was last night? This was last night to my wife. And my wife made a great point. She said, Wolverine is just named after an animal. It doesn't matter what his claws are made out of. Yeah. So he would not be knife arena or blade arena.

He's just still, even if he had keys, he'd still be Wolverine. Anything could be sticking out of his fingers, and it would be Wolverine. The reason he's named Wolverine is because he's short. Yeah, his height. He's a small guy. He's like 4 foot 11 or something. I couldn't even be Wolverine then. Yeah, Wolverine is slightly above average global height.

Yeah. How tall is Wolverine did you say? Like 5 foot 4, 5 foot 2 somewhere around there. He's really short. That's the main aspect of his character. I don't think his power is that he's short personally. I think it's the giant blade. He's Wolverine and his brother is Sabretooth.

That's his brother? I thought they were enemies. Well, they're friends at first. Oh, yeah. They're brothers at first. I don't know anything about Wolverine to be honest with you. Okay, so Wolverine is 5'3. Okay.

So I was almost right. It's Hugh Jackman really short? Hugh Jackman is six foot two. What? He's too tall to be Wolverine, yeah, but he's too good for the... But name one male actor who's... five foot two besides Danny DeVito. Just get Danny DeVito to play him, man.

Why is that a problem? Danny DeVito is too old. If the main thing is his height, he wasn't in 2001. Okay, but here's the other, okay, I think the main thing is his height. That's what we were saying. Caleb, I want you to cover you, don't listen to what I'm about to say. Okay. Here, but the other thing about Wolverine is his hairdo, and I don't think that a balding guy could play Wolverine.

Well, no, all you would have to do. He could still, he could take the sides of it. It's going to look weird, man. And Caleb, don't do that expression because I told you not to listen to this part. I don't know how to not listen. I tried closing my eyes and it didn't work. The only thing, the only thing that matters about Wolverine's hairdo is the sides. So a balding man, a man with like a full Norwood 7 could totally play Wolverine.

Oh, I just Googled it. It turns out, I googled what is the main thing about Wolverine? Turns out it's his superhuman strength and reflexes. Oh, okay, so we're going to have a little bit of trouble finding an actor to play him. Yeah, that would be tough. Because, you know, representation matters. And if you're going to have an actor playing somebody, you've got to get somebody with superhuman strength. Is Wolverville?

Well, that's basically where an adamantium skeleton. I hate to say it, but that's where Democrat SJWs are trying to take Hollywood. Yeah. Is that you can't play Superman unless you have laser beams shooting out of your eyes and you have an allergy to green rocks. but what does he date the girl who has red powers which one are you talking about lois lane you mean red hair amy adams wolverine wolverine does not date rogue he does not date rogue no the red girl who turns into which phoenix phoenix no oh well there was a love triangle thing going on with

in the ultimate in the ultimate universe wolverine is like is an adult and peter parker is 15 and wolverine and Peter Parker get freaky Friday and Wolverine inside Peter Parker's body tries to fuck 15 year old Mary Jane That's fine because it's the body It's also fine because you're whatever It's a Wolverine, you're not a normal guy It's also you're hundreds of years old

Yeah You're saving the world too Nobody can expect him to be completely normal If you're saving the world I don't really care Yeah and yeah you tried like once a year He didn't go through with it Yeah he would have stopped himself

If he made it he would have stopped He would just say, oh, I'm 400. The other thing in the Marvel Ultimate Universe that it's like Wolverine is, Wolverine is supposed to be Wanda Maximoff and Quicksilver. Quicksilver's dad or something. I thought that's Magneto. Well, I think in that universe. Or it switches in the ultimate universe?

Yeah, I think in the ultimate universe it switches. And then they are already in an incestuous relationship. And then I think he watches them have sex. That sounds about right. He watches his own kids have sex All types of crazy shit happens in the ultimate It's the ultimate You know

It's last in a long line of And it's got incest and pedophilia And all types of shit It reminds me of this show called the boys Have you seen this show? No Oh brother Dude

You are about to derail this entire Fucking episode We have to talk about the boys First second Hold on hold on hold on Hold on hold on We have been talking too much About superheroes

When a Homelander uses his powers And he goes Fuck you motherfucker And he does You blast somebody's a woman's head off and then he fucks her dead body. It's a maze balls. Okay. I was about to be a stickler for us getting derailed, but this sounds amaze balls and I need to hear more.

So basically there's a character named Huey, and he's not exactly the most normal of guys because he fights against, you guessed it, motherfucking soups. The soups are basically the bad. It's not for super hero. Or maybe not even heroes, depending on how you see it. But imagine, okay, so you're watching Batman, you're watching Spider-Man, maybe Superman. And you're thinking, this is interesting. I like these powers.

But I think in real life, they would probably use cuss words. Dude. Buddy, you don't typically expect a character in a superhero TV series to have a catchphrase like fucking diabolical. Do you? Yes. Yeah. Or an Australian accent. No.

Well, things are a little bit different in the boys universe. Let me get this straight. Okay. Let me get this straight. You're telling me that the real heroes of the boys. boys universe are the villains well the real heroes in the boys universe i think are the police yeah it's the police and nerds yeah the interesting it's about the police teaming up with nerds and the enemies are superheroes and unions that's basically the enemies of the boys universe

yeah wow it's really badass dude and the fast guy character and some of the characters fuck on screen basically the whole boys show was conceived when the creator of the show or the comic watched the flash and was like basically if he ran into a somebody they fucking explode and a fucking blood. And they turned into JIS.

There's a guy's power was named was Jiz Man. Yeah, it's pretty, yeah. I mean, it's a Jiz Man? There's a guy who's a guy who fucks fish. Everybody gets... Wait, hold up. What? What fucks fish?

Yeah, it's Kanye West from South Park. He's in the show. Oh, he's a gay fish? There's a literal gay, I hate to say it, there's a literal gay fish in the boys. That's crazy. There's a motherfucking gay fish, he goes around, he fucks the fish. And you'll appreciate this, Patrick. The main character is a big fan of Billy Joel.

Yep. I do appreciate that. So he's a music fan. I love Billy Joel. I am a music fan. And also, rappers are bad in this universe. Rappers are not featured in the TV show. No.

Wappers are very consciously not featured. This is a world with no rap. So it's a perfect world. There's no rap. No rap at all. There's no BS pop music. It's all just people exploding. And if you thought Wonder Woman was going to be straight in this universe,

no, man. Let me do one finger gesture for you. I just did a spit take. I just did a spit take with no water. It is. It is so awesome that in that show, the thing that they keep, like, because the whole thing is they're like blackmailing. superheroes and stuff and the thing that they're blackmailing all the superheroes for is being

gay it's all being gay and being addicted to drugs yeah every yeah yeah which is so funny because it's i read the comic of it a while ago and it's like it's garth ennis so it's very it's super it's all what is he what else did he do he did preacher and uh yeah some of the punisher and stuff uh but um it's all like yeah every the secret the dark secret of every superhero is they're all gay pedophiles literally every single one of them and then yeah they don't know how to do it in the show right so it is very strange so they just take away all the pedophile stuff

I don't I only watched I think like one and a half seasons oh also the main the main villain Homelander goes full fat bastard and eats a baby what? Yeah oh yeah he does do that's copyright infringement no yeah he goes he fat bastards at the end of the show He is stealing fat bastard's intellectual property. Yeah, there's photos of him where one night he got really drunk and he went fat bastard.

Why do I feel like the boys is almost like methadone for an MCU-addicted culture? Damn. Holy shit, man. Oh, he's like I could write for the AV club. I think you'd have a very. strong resume. One line

in the application. The boys is dead. It starts with why do I feel? Why do I feel weirdly like the boys is some kind of methadone for an ICU addicted culture? Cameron.

I'm addicted. I'm addicted to the MCU. Yep, say it. The moon cycle units. Yep. Let me segue this back. Superheroes. Of Uranus.

planet Krypton. Yeah, what happened with how come we haven't tried discovering Krypton? Has anyone been to Krypton yet? I think that it's in a different galaxy. I think that that's the problem. Why does that stop us? Are we allowed to go between galaxies? Let's stay in the Milky Way,

you guys. Why? Because once we get into us, but not the human race, but our discussion. No, no, we can talk about we can talk about this every which way when the episode's over. I thought you were suggesting that the entire human race should not travel beyond the boundaries of our galaxy. I've seen Event Horizon and stuff.

I've seen Event Horizon. I've seen Alien. I know that we shouldn't even go beyond the limits of the Milky Way. Do you guys believe that... I've seen... I've played Mass Effect, too. I know that the getther coming for us. I thought you were suggesting right now.

I thought you were proposing a global policy. I thought you were saying, guys, let's not leave the galaxy. No. Everybody, let's make a promise. Let's not leave the galaxy. I am proposing that. I am proposing that. We are not, uh-uh, I don't want to know.

Patrick's picture coming up like a Zoom meeting on a giant projector in front of the U.N. Guys, let's not leave the galaxy. All the countries, the Congo is like, yeah, shouldn't be doing that. Dress is Mercury saying, don't leave the galaxy, let's keep it in the galaxy. We don't need to know about all that other shit. We don't need to leave the, can we start a petition to not leave the galaxy? I'm down. I think we should.

We should start that. Let's go into change.org. Let's type that up right now. There will be a QR code on the screen. Well, because it's the thing you could see things. Here, you know what? Let's show our planets because this is in it. We guys, speaking of leaving the galaxy, these are, if you believe in an infinite galaxy like I do,

then these planets surely exist because every variation of planet exists in an infinite, not an infinite galaxy, an infinite universe. So there are other, there's probably an entire galaxy that has all of our planets in it in a row. Yeah, but these planets that, but these planets we're about to show, these exist in our galaxy because we're not leaving the galaxy. And we know these are here. Okay, Patrick, show us your planet, mate. I'm showing you my planet right now. Describe it for all the people who are listening.

All right. So this is my planet that I discovered. And this right here, it is a red planet with a lot of, A very elevated planet. It almost looks like a meatball. It doesn't say. It looks a lot like a meatball. And what the hell is that?

A face! There's a face on this planet. Whose face is that? Who is that? You guys, this whole planet is alive. It is the Meatwad planet. Okay. You were talking a big game before this episode.

You were saying, I'm going to win. You wanted to make a competition. You wanted to change this into a contest. You thought this could be. Once I, no, no, once I found out Julio had the best planet, I knew that I would step down. I knew that I would step down because. But before you knew that, you were confident this planet would win the number one planet. Well, I didn't know what you guys would have.

But this is the planet, though. This is planet meatwad. It looks nice. It doesn't look that much like meatwad, though. I'm going to be really good. Well, it looks like, okay. You know, in the MCU, in the MCU, when they try to make, like, Howard the Duck look real? You think this is what it would look like.

This is like, yeah, photorealistic meatwad. Like, like, real home or sex and vibe. Yeah. Why does it have so many moons? It has so many moons. What's put the dandruff on its head? The dandruff is actually city lights. Oh, those are the cities?

Yeah, those are the cities. I can turn those off and on. Wow. Right there. I like that everyone's kind of afraid to colonize the eyes and mouth a little bit because I feel like I would be living right on the lip no you would well there's some people right here I've lived on the lip and I'd be rubbing the ground all day with my body see right here right on this corner of the lip it's uh this is where all the people live uh these are the

most these are the most the most the bravest citizens of planet meat wad I feel tell us about the culture and the atmosphere and all types of things more than the appearance what's well it's mostly what who's living on planet meatwad the meatwadians Okay, and they look like Meatwad? Yeah, they pretty much all look like Meatwad. It's like how you looked like Earth the other day? Yeah. Okay.

Yeah, I'm going to be honest, you guys. I didn't think that much about this, and I didn't think that you would be able to see the face on the texture that I uploaded. It was just going to be Planet Meatball until I saw that the face showed up. So you uploaded a picture that had the texture of a meatball but also a face? on it? No, I made it red. I made it red and this is a Yoda.

This is a Yoda mask. Oh, okay. I can show you my custom texture here. I do like how this looks right now. I thought it would show up like, I thought that would be an interesting texture to put on a planet. That would be kind of interesting, but I think Yoda already has a planet.

Yeah, he does have a planet and it is Dagobah. But, yeah, this is, I think, the loser of the planets. No, go ahead and just freeze me. Tell us some stuff. Why? Tell us about the detail about the culture or the climate or just tell us

about it. There's a spaghetti sauce C. See, this is what I like to hear. I'm liking this. All these low elevation parts right there. That's the spaghetti sauce C. It's mostly spaghetti sauce.

And there's the whole United States. The entire United States. A lot has not changed. I can tell you that a lot. This is Planet of the Apes. This is the Earth in the future. One day, this is what it looks like.

You guys, I was more focused on O.J. the Alien, but now I think that Planet of the Apes becoming a meatwad planet. Patrick in the U.N. doing a Greta Thunberg conference about how we need to stop clouds before the Earth is going to look like this in five years. This is what Earth. This is what Earth would look like in five years? It will be a planet meatwad. Half of the United States would be in this.

And look, look, look, where Earth, the moon is going to become Earth. That's scary, man. That's terrifying. Wait, so now I'm feeling like this, you would go to the UN and you would say, can we need to stay in the galaxy. They would be like, okay, then you start showing them this, and they'd want to leave the galaxy immediately. This is a horrifying vision of the U.N.

your mind man well this is we need to stay in the galaxy and we need to stop focusing on going to the other galaxies and stuff this is what happened is it happy to live on a planet like this we need to stay in our lane is what the lights are still on we are we are we got to stay in our lane and we got to make sure that this doesn't happen this is more of the side profile on this thing is really handsome yeah wait come back to the front profile It kind of lined up perfectly. I didn't even think the nose would get a ridge like that. It looks amazing, man.

Yeah. Well, what my planet lacks, it makes up for in aesthetics. You don't have to be hard. Now it's grown up, now that it's evolved past just being Meatwad, I'm in love with your planet. Yeah. See, we needed just the details, man. Here, I'll go next because I do feel like Caleb is going to be better than mine. Okay.

that's a little bit harsh too no it's okay he was also talking a big game and I didn't have that to spend that much time on mine I will say you are the most humble of the three of us in terms of your planet it's not that I spend that much time on I just have a natural talent I think we're gonna start with

this view of my planet what do you guys think it looks amazing it looks green and I bet it looks like this all over you know what this looks like can you guys describe what you're seeing right now I'm just okay yeah so it's It's like a gray planet, and it looks like there's some kind of fuzz around the edges of it, but not all the way around, kind of like a horseshoe-shaped fuzz going around the sides of the planet. This looks like popsicle shots.

Do you remember those? The lemon lime, it came in a cup and you would get it from the ice cream. I'm trying to see it. Oh, God, man. This is a foot. This is a photo of a foot. Two feet. This is a photo of two feet.

This is a photo of two feet that has been turned into one of the most disgusting worms I've ever seen in my life. Are these your feet? No. Yeah. These are your feet. These are like this on my feet. Yeah, that's, oh my God. Oh, my God.

Look at those corns, dude. Okay. So, what's, what's your plan? Oh, my God. Is it, what's it, planter fasciitis? This is planet feet Okay And it's a very stinky planet

As you can see by the green atmosphere That I'll highlight you This is the atmosphere color That's amazing This is what it normally looks like But I removed the atmosphere for you guys To be able to see it Very dense green stinky atmosphere

So this planet is uninhabitable Due to the stinkiness The climate and the grossness of it Every food And this planet The size of this planet it is about eight inches in diameter. Okay, so kind of even small for a foot.

Eight inches in diameter? Yeah, it's very, very small. It's not a moon. It's not a moon. It's a dwarf planet. It's an exoplanet or whatever they call it. And it is located in New York City somewhere. And whoever possesses it possesses great power.

It's currently set into an amulet. This is, yeah, this is like I was going to ask. Is this like the cat that has the little Orion necklace and men in black? This is exactly like that. Yeah. This is kind of a mcuffin. Some bodega cat in New York has this around its neck. This is probably the most disgusting thing we've ever shown on the show.

Oh, absolutely. You guys should have seen when it was a butt before. This is a YouTube episode. I wish that I could see this. Wow, look at this angle. You know what? Okay. I can see what it would look like as a butt right now.

It's almost impossible to describe what I'm looking. I'm very sorry. The land is the feat, but what is this black void? That's the core of the planet. Oh, it's got an open core. Yeah, it's an open core scenario. I could see this being in like Super Mario Galaxy. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that's actually where it originated. Oh. Okay, and you said nobody lives on this, right? No, nobody except for one guy. who I just remembered who lives there. And what's his name? Caleb.

I don't, but not me, right? I thought, I think his name is, it's just, yeah, I don't remember his last name. I think it started with P, but I don't, I don't know that many details about him because I never been here to try and, I don't really want to go anywhere near it. A glitch, you said?

It's just a glitch, yeah. Okay. Well, maybe it's just a glitch. That's a mental glitch that you're having because it just can be true. That's my planet, planet feet. All right, come to show my planet, man. Oh, all right.

Let me see your planet. Oh, God. I'm moving slow to see this planet. I do. And I'm excited to see Julio's planet also, even though I already saw it. Okay. Okay, so what I'm seeing here, let me try.

This is planet chill. This looks like a person wearing sunglasses. whose face has been violated and completely flayed by one-ch-million rubber bands. Yeah, this looks like a cenobite. It's not, oh, this is fully cenobite vibes. I guess it does kind of look like somebody. This is Planet Chill. This is the Earth revolves around Planet Chill.

The Earth is one of, is one of the moon, or is the only moon of Planet Chill. Oh, God. Yeah, this looks like when they try to blow up a watermelon by putting rubber bands on it. Look at the side profile on this, man. This is cool. So here's how this planet works. Everybody lives on the white face of the man in the planet, planet chill. And then these are, they look like sunglasses from space,

but when you're on the planet, they're actually two giant flat screen TVs with Dolby Digital surround sound in the entire planet installed. That's what this back part is. This is uninhabitable wires and cable management in the back. and basically people sit on this edge like it's the Grand Canyon and they watch the Super Bowl.

That sounds awesome. Yeah, and these are giant 70-inch flat-screen TVs on either side over here. There is also a giant crack in the middle of the planet that it looks like... The no man's land. No, it looks like it goes all the way down

it's a hollow earth kind of situation too. Oh. And like I said, so once a year when the Earth revolves around this planet you can actually, once a year meaning the Super Bowl, you can actually, people on Earth can watch the Super Bowl in the sky in space.

That's actually pretty incredible. Yeah. If Earth doesn't... And all the girls live over, all the girls on the planet live over here by the lips. And they kiss the lips all day. They put their butt on it.

They put their stuff, they put their boobs and their butts all over these two big, beautiful pink lips and they kiss it and they love it the girls all live on the lips

and the guys live on all the stuff around the sunglasses and never the twain shall meet and earth revolves around this planet Earth revolves around

basically Earth doesn't fucking matter this is the only planet that matters this is where everything cool is happening everyone on here look there's snow

on earth people are snowing they're shoveling their driveways meanwhile on planet chill people are drinking dackeries there's a giant

hole there's a giant thing that pops out of the eye there there there's another one right there i mean this is basically the only cool planet in the universe and uh earth is over and i think that my my petition to the united nations is that we need to instantly evacuate all eights nines and tens to planet chill as soon as possible wow and the eights will live on this side because they we just need we only need the eights there so we appreciate the the nines and the tens. Well, yeah, and you got to, someone's got to do cable management. Yeah, exactly.

So we'll send the eights back here, and then every once in a while, you'll be walking around this edge land, hunting for, above the sunglasses. Yeah, hunting for money. Oh, and there's an ear. Hunting for money over here on the edge lands. And you'll see one of the eights, and you'll go, oh, God, because it becomes so disgusting to you,

because you're so accustomed to the tens and the nines. but yeah it's like how if you eat you're eating something that's not spicy at all and then you eat something that's a little spicy like a strawberry it burns your mouth exactly and I will say that tens are the indigenous people of this

of this land wow so it all of this belongs to the tens and the eights and the nines are like the nines are second class citizens and the eights are animals why don't you call it planet ten because it's more chill than it is about like the

like the hotness is how hot all the women are is basically oh okay eight to nines and tens with women the guys are all threes so the tens have no choice but to get with the guys also lesbianism is illegal in the entire planet unless it's unless it's on a poster unless it's on a poster unless it's a picture a picture or a video are required pictures of videos are required but they make them off world they you can you make them and then you you act you import them in from Earth. Yeah. It's okay to be gay, though, but it's illegal to be lesbian.

All the lesbians have to live on Earth and all the hot nines and tens and the dirty-dirty-eights. Imagine being gay on planet chill? You'd want to get the hell out of there. It sounds like an amazing short story. Yeah. It sounds like a great old pulp, pulp, fess, sci-fi novel title. Being gay on planet chill. You'd find in the bookstore, gay on planet chill.

It's like Harrison Bergeron or something. The most incredible painting you've ever seen is the book cover. The one, the Harrison Bergeron style story for Planet Chill is two lesbians that go on TV and just start making it. And everyone, and the horror, the sci-fi horror of it is that all the threes start clapping because they think they're doing it for their entertainment. Oh, no. Guys, I heard a new planet just got discovered. They haven't named it yet But a visual feed is coming in right now

Of a new planet that just got discovered I want to see this planet I need to see this planet Oh my god what's this I don't know let's inspect it Let's look closer It looks like some kind of food Oh my god

Oh my god It's some kind of mud man What is this planet Peanut Butter Imagine if you're in space You're on the moon of this planet and you're watching the sunrise and you see the planet slowly orbit

and it goes like that. That would be amazing. This is why we should have been God and God. We should have been God. Can I show you? Because, oh wait, we need to see we need to see Julio's planet also.

That's the most important planet to see. All right, show us your planet and you have to describe it. Oh, okay. Describe it in the best detail possible. My planet is called I have friendship. And everyone in the planet is friends. Everyone on the entire planet is friends?

Yep. So it's really cool. Can you try and describe this visually what we're looking at? No. So basically. what's that over to the side wait it's a moon this planet is not in space

it's moon friendship this is another planet that is in new york city it's exactly the same as the planet but it's just green and it's the moon and it's also called moon friendship this is so beautiful so it's two a picture of two best friends

is the background can you zoom in here to this part of the planet yeah and which friend is is the planet actually made of both of them it looks it looks yeah it looks like it's both. Yeah, it's pretty French it, right there. Oh my goodness.

It's too big. So the atmosphere, or the galaxy that it's in, or the planet mimics the galaxy that it's in. Pretty much, yeah.

That's beautiful. That is fascinating. I wonder if NASA has done a paper on this. And this is going to be great for our audio listener. Yeah, I would say this is the only one

that you have to tune in to understand. Yeah, you really have to tune in and subscribe, probably. This is an amazing planet, guys. Yeah, we're well on our way to creating our own entire galaxy. I know. Which is probably what of the goal of the five weeks of planets?

Are we going to be doing a new planet every episode? No. No, probably not. No, no, no way. I think, okay. So all of these planets need to exist in the same. I know you said that you're just in New York camera, but I think it really should be our... New York is in space.

All four of us. Well, that's true. Technically. Yeah. All four of us. of us have planets in one galaxy instead of the sun

we have the fun the fun the fun the fun instead of the moon we have the chum planet chill is next to the fun it rotates around the fun and it has a chum and

I think Jubio's planets might get Plutoed here pretty soon might get kicked out of the galaxy because they're not really I heard that planet Feet just exploded and it was replaced by the second planet

they just decided. Oh my God. Yeah. That's scary. That is scary. What new planet did they discover? It was this one. Oh, this one?

It's really similar to the other one they just discovered, but the shape is a little different. Okay, so this is the, this planet of the peanut butter man. What is this photo? And that's Will Ferrell? Is that who that is?

I don't know who this is. I don't think that, I don't think this is a who. I think it's more of a, I think this is I don't think I would It's too mountainous And it looks like it's a dry, dry desert

This planet is in And this does not have a chum This is in our galaxy This is a planet is barreling towards Earth This is a planet that they are trying The scientists of our galaxy are trying to eliminate Because it is going to galactic style Destroy every other planet

Oh my God All right And this one has no chum This one has no chum But it does orbit the fun All right Well that's I can get behind that This is the mercury I guess of the

Yeah Let's bring it back to Mercury Yeah let's get back to Mercury Or just the Space in general Well I guess maybe because Okay we're creating our own galaxy That we're pretty soon

Is going to make real Thanks to our prayers to God So what I'm thinking Is maybe each of these planets That we do for the five weeks of planets we can choose what elements we like about them. Ah. To our galaxy.

Create the perfect planet. Yes. Yeah. That's what this is all about. At the end of the month, at the end of the month, we'll have the perfect planet. We could terraform Earth to also match this planet. That's a pretty good idea. Are you guys ever, do you guys ever get scared that you're going to be asleep

and then an asteroid is going to hit the world and destroy it instantly? Or some kind of space object that we've never. discovered that moves at the speed of light that's the size of a quarter is going to hit the earth and go and destroy it into pieces? I'm going to be honest that I don't think about the galaxy and the

solar system too much and I think that that's because that's for my own safety though. I mean as soon as we started talking about other galaxies I was like full isolationist do not you do not engage. Do not engage

I'm going to know you take me to another galaxy I'm a nope the fuck out of there. I'm with you. I'm not so worried about space objects because the thing about space objects is even if they're moving as fast as a thing could possibly move, that's still really slow because of how big everything is. They still would have, yeah, man, if the sun exploded, it would take eight minutes for the light to go away.

But if something hit us so fastly, we would die. faster than the speed of light. But we would know about it. That's what I'm not afraid it's going to happen in my sleep because they're going to tell us about it before it happens. But then there's nothing you can do if you have a big ball headed towards your head. Yeah, but you know about it. This is like, it would be like seeing it would be like if you were out at night

and you looked up at the full moon and you saw a ball falling from the moon. That would be scary. Oh no! Yeah, but by the time it got to you, I would just stand there. I would just stand there. Yeah, exactly. I would not stand there. First of all, I would leave the planet.

I would be terrified with fear. They told us that an asteroid's coming. First of all, I would leave the planet. You know, you wouldn't. I would fly away to another planet. Yes, I would. You would not use codename, kid next door, two by four technology to build a wood spaceship. I would fly away from the planet with a podigo stick.

A podogostick? What the hell is a podigo stick? It's on a different planet. You don't know it. It's a new invention that I got from another planet. It's a bullshit. It doesn't exist, man. It's a podigo stick.

It's on a planet. It's. made by the Potegos. Yeah. I feel like you guys are fucking lying to me. I'm not fucking with you. You're not very

cultured when it comes to planets. I know about every other planet and I know what order they're in. They're smallest the POTA goes. Where are the Potegos? I'm planet Padogean. No, it's not. Okay, well, you got that one.

The Padogians live next door to me. No, they don't. The Padogians are maybe what O.J. The alien is. I don't want aliens to visit because I think that culturally there will be a lot of differences. You're not, you don't fuck with cultural differences? Well, I just think they'll have a hard time.

I think aliens will get here and they'll be like the, they'll be like white guys that order off the menu at the bodega. Yeah, they're supposed to go on. They go into McDonald's, be like, Big Mac. Yeah, exactly. Like they're doing the accent. And they go, what the hell is that, man?

You're not supposed to order off the menu at the bodega? I have discovered that this is, this is, this is, is a thing that only white people do. Why do they have the... I'll have a... Wait, trick. I'll have the Cuomo sandwich, and they go, what number is that? Yeah, they walk out from behind the counter and they look at the menu with you. Because everybody else comes in and they say, let me get a pepperona pizza with shrimp.

And you walk in and you say, let me have the cotton club. I want an ice chicken tender. I have to go in there and I have to say every... I have to look at the menu and then say every single thing piece by piece. Just the ingredient. The menus are fake. The menus are completely... It's like you...

It's a legal thing. It's a legal thing that they have to have a menu because they're technically a restaurant. They have one million sandwiches on... Okay, this wouldn't happen on my planet. I'm just going to say it. On my planet, you got a sandwich on your menu.

Everyone knows how to make it. They always just turn around when I say, yeah, let me get the firefighter. And they turn around and they say which number is this? that what are you talking they they look at me like i'm crazy and the head it's floating above their head like like runescape uh text it's right above their head the firefighter and i'm like we get the firefighter and they say well now i know what they're so annoyed with me can you give me

a hex code for that they do not like me now i i used to order this sandwich all the time called the bushwick at sunrise daily next to my old apartment do you remember that say i get the Bushwick? Yeah, I said, can I get the Bushwick? It's a good sandwich, though. It's a, it's roast beef. Wait until you Happy Ending Massage Place. Wait till you hear what it is. Wait to you hear what it is.

It's roast beef, pepper jack, jalapinos, mustard, like hot mustard. And, well, I would get pickles on it. So you're like a... See, but you know the ingredients. You just say that, dude.

Well, I don't know. Well, I'm missing. a few of them. There's a few more ingredients that I'm forgetting currently. I'm just saying, man, this is, this is, I've discovered, I'm done doing this. I'm done ordering up the menu. I feel like a fool every time. It's making me feel less than. I did it one time and I was like, oh, that's not, clearly not right. They just don't. Well, again, on our planets, if there's a menu, you get to order from the menu. You get to order from the menu. You can always order off the menu. You can always order off the menu. What do you guys think about Mercurians?

The Mercurians are pretty cool, I would say. They have, they got one big eye on the front, right? One big eye on the front, completely white skin. Yep. Not like Caucasian, like white, like paper white. Like paper white. Like Kindle paper white. Maybe this color.

Are they mercurial? They are. many would say they were do they still exist or no no they were they they flew too close to the sun pun intended literally uh shit and they got burned up you could reach temperatures of 800 degrees Fahrenheit yes wait but how is it icy then because it can also reach temperatures of negative 290 degrees Fahrenheit which one would you rather be in I'm looking at a mercury in right now hold on let me show you guys what I'm looking at what does it look like I'm looking at this.

This is not a Macquarie, and I remember. Oh, she's beautiful. So this is a woman with fire hair and a green V-shaped body clothes. Do you think maybe we could get to... Oh, well, this hasn't happened yet. This is in the year 3000. Oh, okay. We'll get there.

We don't have to worry about it. Do you guys think that if we ever go to Mercury, we'll hopefully find oil under the ground? Hopefully. Okay, I just watched a movie that maybe would be relevant to this. it's called Killers of the Flower Moon and I feel like it also has to do with Mercury because of the word moon so why do I feel like my entire life is a pattern

was that movie good has he done it again he did he only made it once it wasn't a fucking really good point yeah that is a really good point do you think that he he probably loves the boys right Scorsese well yeah because it's a send-up of superhero cinema

no because he's like he's like fuck all this MCU shit man I like I like, I like cussing in boobies. Let's watch the boys. Has there much boobs in the show? I only watched the first season. I think there was some pairs.

There's... And I think there were humongous in it. Yeah, I think there's hughis and humonguses in like two episodes, maybe. That's interesting. They should have a hero whose power is the size of her boobs. Didn't they have... Do you remember... That she can distract villains?

Do you remember this show? and they can't do anything. The show on the sci-fi channel, and it was, I forget what it, I think it was called, like, who wants to be a superhero or something?

No, but that would be an amazing show on the sci-fi channel. Could you imagine that? Real sex. It's a space. It's a space taxi. It's a space taxi.

It's a space taxi. Oh, no, that's way funnier. Yeah. No, it'd be funnier if they just syndicated for real sex. After,

but they put, yeah, after like 4 p.m. The Science Channel just turns into real sex reruns. Yeah. We went to Mardi Gras with a can of whipped cream with the Science Channel thing on the bottom right. I watched that one time when I was a kid. It doesn't seem like the realest sex.

No, no, no. It's really a documentary about sex and everything. Yeah. And I learned that the hard way because the episode that I saw, barely any sex stuff in it, What I saw on that episode was a grown man who programmed sex games for Windows 3.1, and it was just him playing these, like, animated, like, kind of like Leisure Suit Larry type games, and it was just him getting horny as shit at his own computer. And they called that real sex.

And I was like 11 years old. I was too scared to look up porn on the computer watching that. And I was like, oh, come on. At 11, you were too scared to look up porn, man. You were a pussy. I didn't know how to delete the history yet. You just don't care. Yeah, it doesn't bother you.

No, no, no, no. It's supposed to not bother you. Yeah, just be unbothered. You're supposed to be free of all kind of thought that age. No, no, no, I'm the middle of three boys, and then I have an older sister, and we only had one computer. I wasn't going to let them know that I'd jack off. I wouldn't look up porn if I was in the middle of three boys either. Yeah, that would be a pretty inopportune time.

How are you even in the middle of three? I'm the middle of three, I meant, of three. I was going to say that doesn't make so much sense to be in the middle of three people. I think that's what you said. I think I just twisted your words. I was in the middle of three boys. I think you twisted my words.

What else did you know, man? Okay, we need like, I don't twist people's words. I think we need like five more mercury effects. My PC just get sent off into space. And I think it's Discord. God damn it. What? My PC just skipped.

That's okay. I got to figure out why that always happens. When the ions or hold on when the ions I don't know what the ions are but when the ions strike the surface

I assume of Mercury they knock off neutrally charged atoms and send them on a loop high into the sky huh I don't understand that I don't understand that fact well here's some facts about Planet Chill because Mercury has some pretty

whack-ass facts I'm going to be honest on planet chill there is a statue of liberty that's fully in a bikini whoa yeah yeah and she's uh she's got a job too or you know what kind of job here's the fact about planet planet peanut man was only recently discovered because it just entered this galaxy because it was beforehand trapped inside of a Ziploc bag, a giant That's really, that's more of a scary fact for Halloween.

A Ziploc bag that was opened up by a meteor. Okay. Then released the planet into the galaxy. There's really only like five space things. Okay, what's the next planet? Next planet is Venus. Okay.

We're going to have to figure out some stuff for Venus. That is, because I think we kind of blew our load on making planets and dressing up. There will be another song. It will be another song, more costumes, and we won't do exactly what we did this time. And also, when it will have a little different. Yes. And I hope you join us on the rest of this journey.

You can see it on Patreon. It's not that it will be next week. It will be on Saturday. What's the day this episode comes out tomorrow? Yeah. Okay, then I, on Saturday, when the next episode drops, or sorry, Sunday, the day after the next episode drops, I will be in shy city, Chicago, and maybe if you come to the show and show me that you have a, you have O.J. the Alien Mercury Wrap downloaded to your phone. I will sign your phone. Yeah, that's a good idea. I'm going to be in. I didn't think of a good thing. Los Angerac, Drilliforna, on November 17.

On November 17. In Los Angeles, Drillifonia, performing 30 minutes of stand-up comedy with my friend Gus Viveros at the yard. We're doing two shows. Go check out the thing and buy some tickets. And that's the yard, the venue. The yard, the venue. Not performing on a podcast.

That would make no sense. So if you want to see Planet Chill in real life, uh come on through and i'll buy you a keychain all right goodbye my friends happy planets happy happy planet month bye i don't know when you were sober it was like everyone kind of respected it when i was sober it was kind of like everyone was waiting to like had another beer it felt like the doomsday clock was at yeah like it was almost like it was almost like we would go out and i would like we'd go to that bar And I would get like a fucking orange soda or something. And then you would like almost buy me a beer every time.

It's funny. When people are straight edge or they used to be alcoholics or something, it's so funny to buy them a beer. And I'd be like, oh, you don't want it? All right. It is mine. I think I did that. Yeah, I did that to brace after the show.

You got to do it every time. Yeah, I had two shots. Because you got to at least, you have to test their, you have to test their gangster. It's willpower. Yeah. I was really good about it for six. months. It doesn't mean anything. If you don't have the willpower to stay straight edge in the face of a friend. Exactly. Offering you alcohol, then you don't deserve to wear the badge of honor

that is straight edge. I 100% agree. You should be every single person in your life who's like an AA or whatever. You should be like asking for their chip. You should be tricking them. You should literally be trying to trick them. Here's some normal. And then if you can't, if you can't smell it before you take a sip? You should be, yeah, exactly. If you don't have the diligence to check for the, the poison that is ruining your life in every single thing that you have. Your touch should remove alcohol from liquids. You should pick up a cup and the cup, the liquid in the cup disappear. It's, it becomes, yeah. And if they don't break on the, the, the seltzer trick, you should be inviting them over and making alcoholic beef stew and trying to, like,

like pouring a Guinness. Yeah, hard beef stew. saying, and they're two bites in. It's delicious. Oh, 15% of 15% AP. Oh, so you like it. I fucking knew it.

Yeah, they're like alcohol poisoning. It's fucked up is so funny. God damn. They don't make edibles for beer and sitting with your ear homies and watching a sports game

and all eating beef stew. Yeah. Yeah. That would actually be so nice. Spilling it everywhere. I was sitting with those shallow bowls. Six bowls of beef stew each. I'm just dying, dude