Podcast About List - Ep. 290 - Caleb Dreams Of Poop

Episode Date: May 15, 2024

We dream, you dream, everybody dreams, but have you ever stopped and thought to yourself: what was my poop dream all about? What could my poop dream mean? Well, I don't know. Subscribe to us on YouTube youtube.com/@PodcastAboutList Buy tickets to our latest live show https://www.swagpoop.com/shows Get extra premium and Gun City RPG episodes at https://www.patreon.com/podcastaboutlist Follow us https://www.swagpoop.com/links

Well, well, well, COVID-19. You have reared your ugly head back into my life. After three years of me not having you. You thought that you were going to destroy me. You thought you were going to take my life away. But I actually sat down in quarantine and I watched so many fucking movies that you're not even going to believe it. Cars, Cars 2, Cars 3, Amplanes, E2 Mama Tambien, Bruce, Almighty, perfect shan, Truman Show, Airplane, Godfather, Part 2, Leonard, Part 6, Her, Django, Lord of the Rings, Salt Burn, Forrest Gump, Parasite, Barbie, Don't Look Up, Birdman, Moonlight, Pearl, Inside Out, Wonka, Holdovers, the whale, split, the boy and the heron, Juno, XMachina, Superbad, Yichumama Tembian again, Tangled, Fargo, Perfect Blute, the Departed, the Avengers, Bavarian, Lobster, the Witch, Psycho, Bohemian,

Phapsody, Lion King, Amelay, Juno again, Shrek 2, and the Big Lebowski, I Tanya, Edress Sins their Handsman, The Amazing Spider-Man, The Revenant, Luca, Challengers, Book Smart, Turning Red, Liquors Pizza, Episode 2 of Star Wars, then I watched Saving Private Ryan in the Sound of Metal, then I watched When Harry Met Soutly, then I watched May December, then I watched One Flew Over the Skookers Nest, then I watch The Black Phone, Toy Story 4, Free Guy, Castle Blanca, Ant Man and Wasp, I Star is Boy. Curella. Then I watched Heat, Fableman's, and I watched Hop Gun, and I saw Zambiland, Princess Pride, and I saw Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Shiva Baby, and I saw Cumb and Sea, and I saw Birdbox,

and I saw Salo or the 120 Days of Sodom, then I saw John Wick 3, then I saw Grease, then I saw Paris, Texas, Princess Bride, American Fiction, Boyhood, then I saw it follows DeVores Prada, Susperia, Skyfall, 007, Reckit Ralph, Ghostblisters. brave puncher glove the good the bad the ugly well well well that's got to be probably around a thousand movies that i watched even while i was in quarantine huh interesting seems like i visually destroyed your ass in the movie watching department covid-19 and you're never ever going to recover from that shit Do you come from a Miflindanda?

Back! Do you work at a Mifflindunda? With Michael's got, they work under. Well, Jim and Pam, they met. And I met Kevin. He made me chilly. And he walked around and he spilled it. They should make a, they should make, oh my God, they should make a spray that after you're done cooking, you spray it onto your pan and it removes all the grease and it's called Jim.

Oh. So you use the Pam first. Yeah. And then you use the gym. I talked with Pam. She made me nervous. Then she showed me her virginus. Come on.

Come on. She wouldn't do that. Well, maybe. When she was. we don't even know what that is so it's possible she could show me that's true she could show you it it's not a real thing

it's a fantasy creature it's not you don't know that she has you don't know that it's not real it's a pet everyone in the office what familiar would they have I would love Jim would have a Dwight

a little Dwight this big I would love pretend it would be really funny to have a familiar and it's a little version of someone you need No, we can't talk. It's the goofy Pluto thing. Yeah.

I just have a pet of them. It's so awesome. I would love to see what Hogwarts house, every member of the office is. Can you pull this up, Julio? I've talked about this before. Can you look this up? I've done this a hundred times. This is something I've thought about before.

Okay, give me an office member, I'll tell you there. Okay, Oscar? Well, we already know it's Ravenclaw. Okay, so I was all right. I thought I was picking the houses. No. Let's start you with this easy one. Okay.

Jim. Griffin door. Yeah. Come on. Dwight. Dwight. Michael? Really?

Michael? I got a hair sticking out. Yeah. But he wants to be Grick and door though. Energy. He wants to be Griffin door. He's a huffle puff, man. Yeah, for show.

Okay. Who else? Snape? Slytherin. Snape is from Harry Potter. Snape is not from the show. Snape. Snape is in the warehouse.

Harry Potter, Dun, Middleth. Snape's in the Warehouse. New Haven. He's in the New Haven. He's office. Chip, Gryffindor. Chip. Yeah.

But that they had the... Angelo Vickers. Oh, that's Gryffindor. No, he's the Ilvermone. He's the U.S. houses. Bobattons. The what? He's one of them sexy-ass girls from Bobat.

Dude, last night I watched, I re-watched In Bruges. I've never seen it. You never seen in? Oh, man. Collie Farrell blicks, he blickies a jit and it gets real bad. Okay. Yeah. he kills a kid yeah i know what it means yeah oh you do yeah my man he probably

sitting there over there saying i don't know he probably he thinks you're talking star wars he just hot dog that's not no dude that's yeah that's scarf and bliss eat a hot dog no man it's not what it means i guess i go to the gym afterwards i'm like oh that was a great workout i should blick you jit no you're fucking up all the slang you don't up the pole on a jit Yeah, up the pole. The hot dog. The hot dog's not a pole. It's a little pole.

A hot dog is a, is a gliz. What do you mean? What's the difference in a glizzy and a jit? Well, a jit is a, is like a baby or something. That's what that means. It means juvenile in training. And a glizzy is either a hot dog or a gun or a penis. You don't glizzy on a jit.

You can't know, because then that is bad. What did you say? You said that in this movie Colin Farrell gives his glizzy to a jit. No, he never said it gets his glissie. the blick He ups the blick on a jit. The glizzy. And there's no glizzy.

There's no glizzy in the movie? No. And it takes place in New York and there's no glitz. There may be a place in Bruges. It's called in Bruges. Where's Bruce? No. Bruges is in Belgium.

Oh, okay. It can't take a waffle. No, there's no waffles. There's no one. I don't know it's in Belgium then. There's no food in the movie. There's no food in the movie. How does he survive the movie?

They don't have food in the movie. Tell me this. You haven't seen. Does he survive the movie? That's, well, I can't say. He doesn't, we don't know at the end. That's probably why he didn't eat food the whole movie. If he's not eating waffles or glizzies,

I guess you're right. He's going to starve to death. That'd be such a funny twist ending for a movie. Oh my God. I got to eat the whole movie. I've realized. Flash he flashes back his whole life. He's never eaten food.

Fuck, I've never eaten. He's never taken a damn thing. He's never shit. Because unless it was trying to be funny. Nobody ever just goes. He's never shit unless he's trying to be funny. Yeah. That's how movie.

Nobody shits unless they're trying to be funny. Yeah, that's true. Like nobody does just a normal. Most shits are much more on the side of drama. They're either. They're either, because they're either, you're trying to be funny like dumb and dumber. Or you are about to die like Jurassic Park.

I've never seen somebody in the bathroom in a movie. That wasn't funny. I don't think I've ever seen a death. A bathroom death Henry Cavill Mission Impossible Fallout When he was fighting in the bathroom And he cocks his hands

I only saw the trailer of that one That one's really good Never seen any Mission Impossible movies We said that in the last episode I've seen the fallout show I watched that recently You're talking about that before the episode started Yeah

Yeah I've probably talked about that for about two months now Yeah Well I've finished New Vegas last night Really? Yeah Girlfriends Rejoice. New Vegas is done.

Yeah. So what are you going to make or watch you play now? I'm going to play it again, and I'm going to do a different play style, play-through. I'm going to finally join Caesar's Legion after years of never doing that. Do you guys like being evil in games or no? This is my first evil room. Really? Yeah.

I can't do it. Not on the first play-through, usually. Yeah. But I'll go back. I think I've played New Vegas to complete. I've completed it four times. I played New Vegas two completion four times

The most fun thing you can do in any game like that is just kill everybody you see and the world empty I did that the first time I played Knights of the Old Republic when I was a kid I did it

and I had so much regret at the end that I had to immediately replay it as a pure good and that's what I did be really good every single game that happened to me with Fallout 3 you see that you know they do a really good job of teaching you that

Bet being a mass murderer is actually bad. You've got minus two charisma sometimes. Yeah. And in Knights of the Old Republic, you grow horns. Yeah. So I... That's sick. What are you talking about?

Well, no, I don't want horns. I want to be attractive to... I guess you know a bat anymore. Bastila, the female Jedi that I want to have sex with in the game. But not in real. I'm a bastardler. Yeah. But they do a good job, especially in the fallout games.

Yeah. Because you can't do anything. All of your friends... Yeah. The only people you... want to talk to are the real ugly people if you're bad. You don't get to talk to any of the... Yeah,

none of the beautiful people who are just sitting there. I tried to replay Fallout 4. I just truly cannot do it. I think that that game just truly sucks. Is that one in Boston? Yeah. Yeah, that's the Boston one. And they don't even get any of it.

It doesn't even get any of it accurate. That's what pisses us off a little bit. The accuracy. Is the accuracy of the game? Is there at least one or two places where you walk to somewhere and you realize what it's supposed to be and you go...

Oh. They have... For real? Salem. The Boston Common is about the size of this room. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, I can understand that. Yeah. Piss me the fuck off. You get the freedom trail is a big part of the game. That sounds pretty sick.

I'm not going to lie. I believe you that the game is bad, but I probably will have to play to see all the favorite places. They relied too heavily on the settlement thing and it's really annoying. Yeah, you like build a house and stuff.

Yeah. It became the Sims. Which the Sims? I hate the Sims. I don't like that game. Yeah, I hate it too. What? I hate the Sims.

I don't like the Sims. I like the Sims. Show me the real world. He's never had Woohoo. Show me the real world. I don't want to see some simulated shit. You can see the world. You're all around you.

Yeah. Show me a flower. You're in the game. There's a flower in the Sims. There's a gardening area. Maybe I haven't played it long enough. You didn't even get to the point where you could see a flower. You just were in.

character creation? Yeah, I think I maybe only play character creation, then I get bored of the base game. I will say the Sims is... You have to have a creative heart and you have to have willingness at the moment. You have to like interior decorating. I hate interior decorating. Or you have to like being Guantanamo Bay. I see that.

That was the other thing I was going to say. I hate the Stanford Prison Experiment. Yeah. You don't like that? I hate it. Why? I hate that thing. What about the Russian sleep experiment?

It showed that humanity can be evil. You're thinking of the Russian sleep experience. I'm thinking of both. I'm thinking of any experiment on humans. The two most evil experiments ever. When somebody becomes evil through experiments. Yeah. Fuck you science.

Fuck you psychology. I think it's so awesome that they did evil experiments in real life. The funniest thing was the Stanford prison experiment because it was for a college credit. Yeah. You had to become evil for a college credit. I, have you guys heard about the one where they raised the baby and the monkey at the same time? The baby started. They thought the monkey was going to act like the baby, but the baby started acting like a monkey?

Crazy. And it's like. It's so funny that any random person you meet on the street could in their past have been involved in an evil experiment that happened in real life. Yeah, nobody went to jail for any of that. In real life, nobody who was part of an evil experiment turns into a green and purple mutant. They just walk around and feel bad all the time. Yeah. They just have to go to therapy.

The peak, the closest you can get is a unibomber. Yeah. That's all you can aspire to. But most of the time, you're just going to be a guy who listens to music loud at night on your headphones. Why did I do that evil ass experiment? Yeah. Hanging out at the library. Why did they do that to me?

Why was I was in? Oh, is the point? I was an English major. Our hypothesis is that if we force people to electric shock each other, they'll scream in pain. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, and they actually have to test stuff. Like, that's why science used to be so much more evil.

Is they had to test, like... Well, they ran out of all the good stuff. Yeah. Like, you know, all of history, whenever science was invented, the 1600s, all the way up to, up to, you know, the 2000s, they were like, they were like, okay, let's test it. Does a feather feel good when it tickles? Is it fun to bounce on a trampoline? What's the best chocolate?

The early science stuff? Well, we checked all the box. What happens when you drop a baby on a brick floor? They were doing... Caravaggio paintings as experiments for like 200 years. They have a big book with a bunch of checkboxes. Oh, what is it today? Oh, damn.

Yeah, flipping through the good pages. Ah, shit, shit. We got to make sure these kids stab each other. They cut off every single body part to see if that one hurts. If there's one body part you cut off and like a lizard, it just grows back. It turns out nothing did. Any of those psychological experiments, it's like they always, they always fit. finish it. I've never heard of any of them, like, any of, like, it's like, oh, yeah, the

Stanford Prison Experiment. It was so, like, everybody became, like, so evil to each other. Yeah, they didn't just step in and just stop it. They just, like, well, they got to finish it because for all, you know, the Stanford Prison Experiment, the first, like, you know, two days, everyone wants to kill each other or whatever. And then the third day, it could have become nice. It breaks through. Yeah. And that's what an experiment is where. Where are those blokes that were part of that experiment? They're all dead. They all died the next year, mysteriously. They all pulled, they pulled one grenade. pin while they were in the prison.

They were hanging out with grenades. It wasn't a mystery after all. You can't be hanging with grenades, man. Somebody's going to get the wrong idea. This is my sign. This is my psychological experiment. Okay. One chimp,

one baby, one grown man. One dog. In a room with one grenade. And see who pulls the pen first. I bet you that they've done it already. They've done an experiment of a guy in a room with a grenade for a week.

I mean, how long would you last, realistically? Like, there's no way I could sit in a room with no TV, nothing, like a padded cell and a grenade. So if I'm in there for, I would feel so good. If I'm in there for one hour, I'm playing with the, I'm swinging it on my finger. I'm doing this. I mean, I would definitely be, like, bouncing it, like a tennis ball back and for it on the wall. Just not pulling the pin.

one of those old pineapple grenades yeah yeah one of the ones that sends a shrapnel everywhere and at the last day I mean as soon as that door and then oh my god the door opens

end of the end of the week door opens you think you're getting let in let out another grenade rolls in then you're in a room for another week with two grenades or at the end of that week

I guess I can pull one of them at the end of that week they open up the door and they say you can walk out you walk down a long hallway a door opens you're stuck in another padded room that just only has boxes of grenades or a claymore. Just adding more and more grenades every week to see at what point.

I went to set up a... The Stanford Grenade Experiment. Nobody talks about that one. Nobody talks about that. Yeah. Because it happened exactly like he thought it would. The guy lasted 90. The guy lasted.

Yeah. And he blew it up. He couldn't watch TV, so he pulled the pin. Yeah. And they didn't even have good TV back then. No. Can you imagine how motherfucking terrible it must have been to have. TV invented and then all you get to watch is I

love Lucy. Yeah, some show that's created by mug root beer, like Colgate, the Colgate variety hour. Fuck that. Back then, they only had one channel though so you would watch it and you'd go and you'd talk to all your friends about it. That's true.

Isn't that true? Did you see what happened on who is Mexican? No, what happened on who was Mexicans? Yeah. Welcome back. to who is Mexican our first contestant

Raul our second James dial this number right now catch your vote there's so many TV shows

from like back then that are just completely lost to time forever because they would

just they would they would film that tape the TV show and like put it on air

and they'd be they just throw it away yeah it's like whatever Yeah, it gives a shit. No one's going to want to see that. No one's going to care about this.

This is something that I've recently gotten into, which is called Lost Media. Right, but this is actually fully lost media. This isn't like when they say, oh, there's actually a SpongeBob animation frame where he's pink because they made a mistake. And they took it off the TV. Yeah, but imagine how amazing it would feel to finally find that. Yeah. That has to be like, that's like there will be blood. But so much lost media, people post on Twitter about like, oh my God, lost media.

It's a song I can't remember. Yeah. Yeah. it's lost to you you like yeah you forgot it yeah shazam yeah you lost it bitch well people also

people also think that stuff is lost media when it's just like people will be like this movie is lost media and then all they mean is you just can't stream it yeah

you have to actually but who has a DVD DVD player is a lost device uh huh damn like a DVD player it's like a uh

DVD player perpetual motion it doesn't it's basically the same Rarity. Impossible. It can't be made. Well, we don't know

that it's been around. Yeah, that's true. I think that all that stuff about people saying perpetual motion devices can't be made. I disagree. All right, what's your design?

All right. How about this? A clock that winds itself up. That's not a bad idea. What about a car that drives forever? There we go. We already just came up with two. Yeah.

I can't think of one. I was trying to invent a perpetual motion machine when I was a kid. Would you come up with? I don't remember, but definitely a lot of marbles and ramps. Yeah. Stuff like that. I would say, wait, a potato. People use potatoes for energy. Oh, they grow, yeah. Yeah, and you can just keep growing

potatoes. Well, I guess that's a resource. Yeah. Fuck, man. This is hard. Okay, you have to harness the natural power of the earth perpetually. At the MFA, they had a robot that oiled itself. I thought that was the coolest thing ever. Is that a perpetual oil machine? That's what gave me the idea. I think that I

asked what it was and my parents said it was a perpetual motion machine and I was like, what's a perpetual motion machine? And that's why I wanted to invent one. You would need to do well, let's see, you could use a dog that drools into a thing like water

like a water wheel. And the drool could be the power. All you have to do is find somebody Okay, it's this simple. All you have to do is basically find two people who are immortal and will live forever. One of whom has the ability to digest

poop and poop out food. Okay. So a vampire, human circle peed. So now we've invented the perpetual motion. A vampire represses a button forever. Yeah. A vampire running on a treadmill. Yeah.

Anybody who's immortal who's willing to just book it forever. You cut out a whole person out of the equation. Yeah. That's perfect. he just has to press a button yeah we figured it out yeah

and now all I mean scientists are gonna say oh it's against the laws of physics it's against it's against the law it's against the law maybe it's against a lot of decency but yeah

to have a physics no but you're a scientist what the fuck do you care about that yeah you made a baby into a chimp yeah you made a vegetable into a fruit

yeah yeah you made you made another seriously tomatoes are fruits now yeah what the fuck I honestly I honestly believe So what's pizza, fruit bread with cheese?

Probably some bullshit like that. Yeah, is pizza, a fruit cake? Yeah, is it a pie? Oh, it is a pie? Oh, my God. Another thing that's like that, what the fuck? I think that they were honestly

90% of the way there to actually doing alchemy. Yeah. And then they gave up because they said, because people said it was impossible. But I think that they were pretty close. They did it in the modern era. What do you mean?

It's all, they change all the elements all the time into stuff. Yeah, you can gold plate stuff. No. Like, you can, you can, you can, put stats, they, they figured it out. They do alchemy now? Yeah. Well, they change all, they change, they can change lead into whatever.

Really? Yeah. Gold? Probably. Well, I guess. I bet you that somebody, I bet you some, like, cheeky artistic scientist turned lead. And as soon as they figured out about isotopes and change and, uh, neutrons. They did it.

They did it. They were like, I'm going to turn lead into gold. So why isn't this table made out of gold right now if we can do that? Because we poor. But if we had the funds. Well, we just do alchemy to it and make it gold. Okay, go ahead and buy all the materials, man. How many, it can't be that expensive.

It's not as expensive as gold, the most expensive thing on Earth. I saw a video of them making like a completely, there's like a machine that like zaps stuff and it turns it into gold. And they did it with a-Finius and Furb. No. I saw, I saw scientists doing this. This is a, this is a jank. him video from a long time ago, I think. I'm pretty sure this

Gold magazine is doing alchemy now. I swear to God. I also am not... If you're watching this Larry or Ian or whatever and this video exists and you guys did that then send it to me I guess I'm not 150% sure

that you actually can turn lead into gold but isn't it so fucked up that they were trying to do that for hundreds of years they're like we're going to turn lead into gold and we'll be rich and will change the world and then they figured out modern science and they found a way to turn out turn lead into gold but it turns out it's more expensive to turn into gold just to buy

gold so so upsetting can you imagine how like going back in time telling one of them that would be so pissed off telling all telling we can do this in the future but nobody wants to do it it's not worth to you translate like a scientist yeah from like back then on this thing

that you you guys have spent like generations trying to figure out yeah we can do it but nobody even wants to it's useless yeah We have TikTok on our phone. That would be so sad. Just explaining that to like some old English guy who barely speaks like regular English. He's saying fucking ye old or whatever.

And you're like, this is called the renegade. This is a TikTok dance. And this is worth more than gold. Probably going to an ice cream shop. Ice cream. Ice cream. Put two peas in me. P.P.E.

Ice cream. Ye old ice cream shot. Yeah. An ice cream. Ice cream They listen to yourself Yeah I'm really dumb Sorry I'm sleepy man

Me too I woke up 10 minutes before we recorded I've been kind of obsessed with the medieval era As of late I'm not I think I love the medieval era I love the future I do think that we need to

I think that we need to go back To taking people's skin off their body Flaying I don't think so Why Because it would hurt Well you wouldn't do anything bad But for people who do

the Kia boys, they should have the skin ripped off their bodies. Kia boys. You got to chill on them. Why? They'll steer your damn car. They'll steer it. They won't even get in it because I don't have a Kia, bro. There's no way they'll steer it. That's so fucked up. It's so crazy that they it's just a thumb drive that you can put in the car. It's fucking Christ. It's smart.

The future's so stupid. Well, every car now. It could never do that to a horseman. No. That's true. I didn't put a thumb driving a horse. You're going to get it. Well, they used to do the same thing with carrots back in... Put a carrot in the horse. Yeah, I guess it's the...

Put the carrot in the horse and now it's yours. When we were in Detroit, there was a giant lot of, like, a thousand F-150s. And Steve was like... Yeah, yeah. I was like, what the fuck is that? He's like, oh, that's a lot where, like, they ran out of the silicone to make the microchips that actually run the car, so the cars is just completely useless. it doesn't have the

microchip. That's so crazy to me. There's a chip shortage, man. You can't even drive the, it's everything except for that. You can just replace it. Why don't they just change all the hoses so that it's like an old car? Just make it a normal car. You don't need a microchip.

Were they supposed to be like electric trucks? No, no. All cars need a microchip. Yeah, now every car, when you break, you're not actually physically pushing the brake pad. That's why The used cars were going crazy a few years ago during COVID because there had a microchip shortage. So when you're buying used cars. When the world shut down two years ago.

You could get hell of a hell of money for you. You got like Kendrick Lamar right now. When the world shut down two years ago. You get almost $1,000 for a used car. Yeah, which is massive. A $2,000 for a 2003 Ford Focus that has 30,000 miles on it. I'm thinking of dumping my ride, y'all. Really?

I'm surprised you haven't already to be on. I thought that the past couple years, I'm probably in $9,000 on this car that it probably cost Blue Book $3,500. So I think it's time to move on from this car. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's finally time. You hung on to it for a long time. It grew green mold.

I cleaned out the green mold. Oh, okay. And then the mold turned white. And then I cleaned that mold out. And now there's almost no mold in the car. So if anybody would like to buy. There's no window. There's a window.

I fixed the window. The flap, what's that called? The hood. The hood exploded up on my wife while she was driving down the highway at 70 miles an hour, exploded the front windshield. That has all been fixed. Okay. So everything's been fixed.

Ready to sell. Ready to go, man. Ready to leave your, get it out of my life. Leave things a little better than you found them. Exactly. That's one of my mottoes. And I don't think I need a car all that much right now.

Doesn't seem like it. I've realized recently that I have lived in New York City for about four and a half years, and there's no real reason for me to have a car. Yeah. I've used it. There's a train. Very sparingly. Last night, I did go to dinner, and I was a little bit pit.

Thank you. Went to dinner. I go to dinner. Listen, me and the wife. Thank you. Yes. Yes. Not you.

Thank you. I go to dinner about once a month these days. Uh-huh. Saving money. Yeah. type of thing. And I really almost didn't even go to this because it was 40 minutes by train to get to the dinner. And that is too much. Maybe I'm built different. I like riding the train for a long period of time. I do to I will read. But the sleepiness. And it's time you can only

read. The sleepiness that affects me past the evenings. Oh, you're going to a late dinner. It wasn't even late. It was a 745 reservation. But I have to leave my house at 6.50. That is late. I love going out. Here's my, this is how I do it. I go out to dinner hella early before anybody else in New York wants to go to dinner. We get in, we get our food, we get out. Yeah, that's good. And you go hang out the rest of the night. It's incredible. Nobody in New York goes to dinner before like six o'clock. The restaurant opens at five. If you go, yeah, if you go at like 545, you'll have the best service, you'll have your food quick and you get to leave. Yeah, that is pretty good. That's smart. And watch a movie.

Eight o'clock is prime. I mean, that's prime time. Yeah. Everybody, let's go to dinner. Let's go to dinner. I forgot to make dinner for the past two hours because I was working too hard my emails all day. Yeah, fucking dumb asses. That's what I do. You're dumb. Yeah. Piece of shit.

I made dinner and then I was, I was bamboozled. I was tricked into going to a drag show with my girlfriend on Saturday. Why do you have to be tricked to going into a drag show? Yeah, what's wrong with the drag show? I didn't know it was happening. And then we went there and she was like, oh, this is going on. And I was like, this was your intention the whole time you could have just asked me. If she had asked, would you have said no.

No. I would have said, sure. Okay. But she thinks he would have said no. Me and Cam should get mad at your girlfriend. and like Republican parents. I can't believe you brought Patrick. Patrick, he's so easily influenced.

You're trying to groom him. He's going to become a drag queen. You should have become a drag queen. I probably, from what I saw at that show, it's a lot of lip-sinking. What would your drag name be? I don't know. Patrick the Queen.

From what I saw of this show, it's a lot of lip-syncing and dancing. Yeah. I think that maybe I could maybe be decent at it. It's karaoke where one person gets star time. You would be perfect at being a drag queen. Probably would. You would be, oh my God.

There's always the one drag queen that's like supposed to be like a, like a, you know. A what? Like a big busty. Bucksum. Bucksum. Big butt, big boobs. Yeah, you and like a corset, but you keep the mustache. Yeah.

That'd be kind of awesome. They were going off. It was a good show. I will say. Shaped like a boomerang. Yeah, you don't have to lie to us. I wasn't lying.

We're all cool here. You don't have to say you enjoy it. You know what the funniest thing was I was enjoying it and then I turn and I look to my right and there's this dude who I haven't seen since I was like 19 years old at the skate park. It was a guy from New Hampshire. Whoa. This guy that like lives with my buddy and they're they, I think he lives in like Baltimore

now and they're like building a skate park down there. Okay. And I turn and look to my right. I turn and look to my right and this guy is like they're the, the host was singing that song Gloria and he's like screaming it with her and like pointing his beer at her and I was like I walked up to him

and I was like oh shit what's up man I haven't done that he was like oh hey like kind of embarrassed to like be there why was he embarrassed man I don't maybe he just wasn't expecting to see somebody skater and all skaters are homopholes you know what the actual bad part of drag brunches what so they always do it at like 3 p.m.

Yeah yeah that ain't that it's you can't be eating eggs at 3 no let's get it done in the morning that's what I learned is I want a 730 a.m. drag breakfast yeah please it's I want to be waking up my listen I gotta get this is drag ladies just fucking just do the thing this is drag dunch this is drag dunch this is drag dunch or whatever it's a gunch you touched her gunch I didn't say that I said this is drunch I didn't say I touched a gunch can you imagine

if you did how good it feels to dress up like a girl with makeup maybe makeup i uh feel like it would be uncomfortable yeah having having worn blue face paint i did a dracula thing and it was uncomfortable yeah blue face paint is pretty uncommon but you but you felt like dracula and you felt empowered i did feel like the yeah i did yeah it just sucked when i we would go places after and then I would realize I didn't clean up the makeup good enough. And I would have, and I would have the, just like, my face was like pale, whiter, like, whiter than the rest of my body. If I was a crazy person and I had no friends, I would wear just face paint everywhere.

Yeah. I would go everywhere and hang out with corpse paint on. The full Dracula outfit was tough when we would go to those bars where they would have the, no big white t-shirts, no giant black. cloaks. Yeah. Yeah. No widows peak. No widows peak.

No fangs. Oh, come on. We know who you're talking about. Okay. Just say it. Just say it. You're fucking racist. You don't want a vampire.

It's a bar. It's a bar called garlic. Garlix. Garlicks. No fangs. No giant cloaks. The bouncer is inviting everybody in except for something. Yeah.

Let me check the idea. Come on in. Says count. First name count, no. Can't come in. You're not allowed in here. What kind of parents named him count? Yeah.

Probably a mathematician. Okay, guys. Today, we will be analyzing dreams. Yes. And we've been having some bizarre dreams ourselves as of late. Yeah, so we are going to read some dreams that we found online and we're going to talk about what they've I've done this before, but you weren't here. Yeah, I guess I wasn't here.

So now you're here with the dream masters who are basically experts. So, yeah, you guys are the dream warriors. So I have a dream that I had a couple nights ago. Yeah. Okay. And I'll just tell you about this. And then I'll ask you about it. So basically I had this dream a couple nights ago.

It took me a long time to fall asleep. I was having trouble sleeping. I finally fall asleep. And I had this dream where I shit in my pants. And my pants were filled with poop. that wasn't a dream my pants were filled with poop and shit and I shitted my pants and I

woke up and I thought and I was terrified that I knew what the dream meant but it turns out I don't know what it meant okay I have questions about this dream when you say that your pants were full of shit do you mean that it was like

you shit your pants in a normal life and it was just in the back or was it a blowout situation where the Duky travels to it was going to It was going down my leg. It was going down my leg. I don't think it was in the front. So you were, like, going about your day and you shit yourself. I don't remember at all the context of where I just remembered the dream of shitting myself and be like, oh, fuck.

Okay. And trying to find change of pants. But I was not at home. I remember that in the dream. Was there a smell? Not in the dream, I guess. I wasn't. I think maybe you farted in the real world. Yeah. That's what I was thinking. That probably I just had one strong stomach gurgle. Yeah.

And it created It was a real world fart But God, I don't have that moment of waking up being like Nice No, no, no, no, no, no, please no Yeah Did you check yourself when you woke up? Yeah, of course, that's what I'm saying

I'm waking up from that dream The moment of pure terror Did you check? Well, I don't want to be crass Right But did you check, did you go Hand, tacoed into your ass cheeks? I did not at this point

or maybe I did I don't know I was in the middle of the night and I was definitely I didn't like get up and check but I was like But you felt you

you wiggle back and forth to see if there was any witness okay well then I'm going to say that this dream means based on my research and I have some stuff

about this and it's funny enough that you should bring up shit because if you can believe it have some shit stuff I can't even believe that I bet we all three do probably

I think so but that one I'm going to say means good things are coming your way yeah that I would say that you're expelling toxins from your body there's that but then also there's the the the the like actual you experienced good fortune

which is that you were told your brain told you that you shit your pants and it turns out you did yeah right so that was that was your spiritual guidance giving you relief it's one of these dreams that your body is telling you you're damned if you don't

you're damned if you do wow you got to know when to hold it that's what you're going to hold it that's what that song was about you got to know when to hold your poop you got to know when to fold the toilet paper because it's only single ply no when to walk away from the toilet

because you can't flush it it's already clogged yeah you can't wipe anymore no when to what's the last one no one to run which is the runs Obviously, it's the runs. Of course. So, yeah, I'm going to say that was an overall positive dream.

And I'm glad you had that. Yeah, thank you. Because you can't have a bad day once you already thought you shit and then you didn't. Yeah. Like, I'm sure you had a great day. Yeah. Just say yes.

Probably. That's a yes for me. That is a yes. Okay. Somebody else start because I've got to send my stuff. I can start right now. I'm realizing. So this first dream that I see

that somebody had that we are to interpret is that I just woke up from a weird dream about Mr. Bean my subconscious came up with a Mr. Bean

movie where he meets a baker played by Danny Pudy and they bake a cake that defies the laws of physics. What do you think this one means? Well, I think it means

that this person probably should be a writer for Mr. Bean. Yeah, or community. Yeah, I think that this definitely I guess is more of a community plot line

then a Mr. Bean plow. Yeah. Mr. Bean is not typically baking stuff scientifically. No. But Danny Pouty is in community. It's true. You're so smart. Yeah.

Yeah, so this is the beginning. That's why you're the dream. The thing is, dream analysis, you charge by the hour. So there's a lot of fluff involved. Right. Right. And also, it's confidential. It's like a lawyer.

You can't tell anybody what you heard about dreams. Yeah. So I'm amazed that we're even doing it. So this was the first dream that I found that on a R slash dreams. But then everything else that I found was on a, it was kind of like practo, but for dreams. So these are a lot of people asking questions about dreams that they had and asking, can you interpret this? And there were some dream experts that I saw.

But this first one, I don't dream a majority of the time. It's just black. And then I wake up. And they replied, is that okay? and nobody wanted to touch this one. You know, that's a, I can, I can understand just not dreaming. Like, you go to sleep and you wake up without a dream. But just black for eight hours.

Yeah, this means you have no soul. Yeah, this means you're dead on the inside. You are uninsouled. A piece of your body died. God made you from clay and he forgot to breathe the spark into you. Yes, you are just nothing. You are going to return to dust. You are an animal.

Less than dust. Yeah. Somebody else had the exact, opposite, which was last night, I had a good dream. And at the end of it, I was smoking a nice cigar. I remember the taste, the smell, and the relaxation of sitting underneath the palm tree with cool breezes around me. And then I woke up. So they thought, I need this interpret. Right. Yeah. What's the analysis? And the analysis was the expert assistant asked, are you typically a vivid dreamer? And they said, oh, yes. And they said, is there anything else important? You think

the dream analyst should now? And they said, I dream in color. This guy, okay, you're, you are the complete opposite of the last guy. You have, you have the most beautiful. You got two sparks. You got double sparks. You guys were next to each other on God's assembly line. You were, you were, when you were being made, you were twins in utero.

You and this guy in spiritual utero. Yeah. And you ate his spark. Yeah. You ate this man's spark. Because you have two sparks and he has to find each other. And the guy was no spurt. Give me my sport.

to eat him. You have to eat him. Because that's the only way you're getting your spark. This next one, I dream of me and my teenage son naked, nothing sexual, just us hanging out naked.

To which dream symbolist, a verified dream expert said, thank you for sharing. I'm happy to help you understand this dream. Remember, the key is in the details. This type of dream speaks to your relationship with your son in a positive sense. His nakedness indicates his openness

and transparency with you. What are the odds that someone named dream symbolist becomes a dream expert. If you, if your parents, if one of your parents told you that they had this dream.

I had a dream about us naked. Would this ruin your life? Yeah. It'd be pretty bad. Yeah, I would kind of be like, don't tell me that. I think this is a one way ticket to juvenile detention.

But you know, what's also, what's just as bad and maybe worse than your parent telling you they had this dream is that they don't tell you and they post on a forum

asking about the meeting of it. And then you find it in the history. Yeah, find it out listening to your favorite or you find him with an incognito tab open searching this dream. naked son dream meaning yeah imagine finding this next

one in your dad's history okay it's a strange dreams it's a strange dream so don't pick on me my wife was giving me a blow job and then she started sucking on my ball she was sucking him really hard and dragging me around the house by them then she dragged me back to the couch and continue blowing me

then my dog was barking white French bulldog and wouldn't let me let her near me then my wife came back to me and started giving me a second blow job and then I woke up. How do we interpret this one? Because there was no answer. Okay. This one to me is obvious. Simple.

Which is that you have your dog is getting in the way of you and your wife's relationship. You need to get rid of your dog down. You need to get rid of the dog. You need to kill it. The dog will haunt you through other dogs unless you end it. The dog is literally in your internal world. Yeah. It is again with sorry to get all, you know,

spiritual on this episode but the dog is literally projecting its soul into your mind and you need to block it out. You need to sever its head. Yes.

You need to sever your dog's head. Sever the dog's head. That is the only way this link can be broken between you. I do like the idea that he was like in the dream like

okay she's trying something new and he's like she's like running around the house with his balls in her mouth. Just like Mr. Fantastic.

Yeah, just getting dragged around the house. She's really funny. The ball is stuck on her face like a Lego piece. He's not moving at all. He's hanging off of his wife, like the toy in Napoleon Dynamite on the bus. And she's just running around the house. Okay. She must have read this in Cosmo.

I don't know. I don't know what this means. But I'll let it run. It's close. Yeah, no. I'm just going to let her try the thing. I had a dream about pooping in the bathtub in the water and my poop had worms in it swimming in the water

That was not a dream No this happened to happen But the expert assistant asked Is this the first time you've ever dreamt about the worm Would you ever consider yourself an animal lover To which they said somewhat What kind of a question is that? What the fuck is that?

It's just the first time you dreamt about the worm What is this person doing? That's why we're here. That's why we're here because these experts are too focused on the details. This is not even a right. There are worms in it. I'm first trying to drop you up the worm. Are you an animal lover?

What the fuck got a question is that? That is the type of shit when you're sitting in therapy. You're trying to explain something and they ask you some question. Are you an animal lover? What are you talking about? Stay away for me forever. What are you saying? Here's another animal dream.

I dream that an adult lion was laying his mouth on my neck while at the same time a baby lion was sucking on my two fingers on my left hand. Okay, so this guy, I would definitely be banned from the zoo. Banned from the zoo and I would certainly ask if they're an animal. Yeah, this guy, you've got to ask if he's an animal lover. And this is sucking on the two fingers. If this dream form existed in the world of minority report, this guy would be put away forever.

I dreamed someone took a turkey baster and sucked a ton of wax from my ear. It was so gross. It was thick and yellow. Then I took the turkey baster and sucked more out of my other ear. A dead goldfish came out of my ear. Then a live goldfish, then a finger, along with nasty gross. Then I could hear way better. Not nasty gross.

I don't want any nasty gross getting sucked out with a turkey baster from my ears. When your ears filled with nasty gross. Yeah. What does this one mean? I want this to happen. Yeah, I, the idea of how I have always felt like there is some kind of secret chamber of wax in both of my ears that needs to be expelled, which I don't think is true and I think you're not supposed to touch them. I have a lot of wet. Well, you can go to a doctor and they'll take, they'll do wax removal.

Really? Yeah. Is it hundreds? I mean, I don't know. It's probably free. You just can, you can do that. But that's like if you can, I think if you get like impacted ear wax or they'll do it. I don't think I have anything like that.

Well, I think I do that. Yeah, who knows? I was cutting hair of a fat man sitting on a microwave oven while floating in a pool. So this is where... Harmony Corinne vibes. Yeah, what does this mean, though? I mean, obviously a fat guy likes the microwave. That's where all of the food comes from.

Yeah. So he's going to... He wants to sit on it to be warm. Yes, yeah, exactly. Because he's cold in the pool. It's comforting. Oh, I messed up my slides. This was supposed to go.

We'll get to the next one because somebody explains what the symbolism of a fat guy in a dream is. Okay. A little bit later, but this next one. Telling my best friend, I need the toilet, she gives me a light switch. When I go to the bathrooms, there are four doors. I choose one and put the light switch on. When the lights come on, opens to reveal a fat naked man who then covers his genitals and proceeds to plut on a blue shirt and tie. Then the lights go out.

Okay, so another fat guy. Another fat guy dream. And then this is where I screwed up my slides. this is supposed to go after all the fat guy stuff I woke up from a very disturbing dream and I don't know what it means so I was just looking for some answers I woke up from a nightmare screaming get out

before I call the police it seemed so real it's like my boyfriend was hugging my sons and then he slid a finger inside his butt and I saw it with my own two eyes and he tried to deny it and then I ran over to him and smelled his finger and it was him I told him to back up and leave before I called the police and I woke up screaming

then the dream analyst this is I know what this dream means yeah this means that you you watched Freddie got fingered too close to bed time yeah and you which the dream analyst

says to them the dream analyst you'll be able to interpret that is this the first time that you've dreamt about money has there been a major changes in your life recently which they said

did did I say money I said I dream my son was being sexually assaulted by my spouse to which they replied are you typically be a vivid dreamer, and they said, I guess. Yeah, these guys, I mean, they're given no help.

I'm going to be honest. No, these experts suck. Yeah. Zero help. Yeah. I guess I'm a vivid dreamer. The attitude is so funny. I know. I guess.

Okay, tell us what they said about fat people. So then this final one, this is the, this is what the fat guy dream says. In an old dream of mine, I was on my bed, and a fat guy who, I think was supposed to represent my ex was on me besides me as my lover and the fat guy was touching me and showing my lover how to touch my breast and my lover sat behind slash besides him

looking lost and thoughts and I still kept my eyes on him and out of nowhere my lover came forward and stuck his penis in my mouth and I took it without any hesitation and the fat guy stopped touching me and looked in shock to which Mrs. Sandman says fat people in dreams is usually symbolic

of comfort okay Mrs. Sandman is a verified consultant. Why would you not go Sandwoman? Right? Well, she's married to Mr. Sandman. Yeah, Mr. Sandman's wife. But that doesn't give her any sort of credential to be judging dreams just because

you married a doctor. She's verified. She is verified. You are being sexist as far right now. You think a woman can't be a verified dream consultant? Actually, I think that women maybe are the only ones. You think women can interpret and judge the meanings of metaphysical No, I think that they're uniquely qualified.

Next, you're going to be telling me that women are not qualified to read the meanings of the stars. Yeah. No, I would never say that. Good. Drempt I saw someone eating a black bat as in the creature. Dreamed I saw someone eating a black bat as in the creature. Not much else to say.

The dream was devoid of emotion and took place in a white room to which dream symbolist replies, thank you for sharing. I'm happy to help you understand this dream. Was the person eating the bat someone you know or someone you are familiar with? No, it was a young man with blonde hair, sitting in a wooden chair

in the middle of an empty room with natural light coming through the windows. The man, was he devoid of emotion as well? Yes. I'm sitting here thinking he might represent

my dead husband, but not sure. It's kind of sad. Yeah. It's kind of sad. But just dreaming about your dead husband eating a bad

in a white room. That's scary. It's like a nightmare. I don't know. Oh, my God. That's what the dream is. That's a good question. and see, why are you not a dream analysis?

I think you should be on this website. No, I don't have time. Well, could you analyze this dream? I can't do it. I had a nightmare last night. I went into McDonald's, and I saw Adolf Hitler on the counter serving foods. Then I looked at the exit, and I saw Donald Trump guarding the door. Then I heard the toilet flushing, and out came Wiley Coyote from the bathroom door.

It's the big three. The big three, the most evil man of all time. Adolf Hitler, Donald Trump, Wiley Coyote, man. Wow. That is a scary axis of evil. Yeah. That is a huge nightmare. The scariest group of men.

That is terrifying. I like that it's a nightmare without them doing anything. Yeah. They were just at McDonald's. They were just at McDonald's. Which, I mean, if you saw them at McDonald's, run. Run, bitch. Yeah.

Wake up. Wake up. Is that all your? Yeah, that's all my slides. All right. Here, I'll do mine real quick. So I found mine for a bunch of different blogs and stuff. So here's the first one.

Dream Journal, the mystery deuce. Wow. Plot summary. Last night I dreamt I was a participant on a reality show run by heavenly angels and produced by atheists. No. Weird things happened. We had no idea what was going on or why. We all lived in shared house, but I had a private bedroom with a connecting bathroom.

Every morning, I woke up to a mystery deuce in my toilet. That's the full dream. Wow. So the dream is that. Someone else was pooping in their toilet. They dreamed the best TV show. of all times. Yeah. The mystery pooper. Like, oh my God,

it's such a great idea for a reality TV show. It's Big Brother. There's one bathroom. Yeah. And it can't be flushed. And they say that. So it's whoever's holding their poop the longest kind of wins. But you also have a voting off element where... If somebody

does shit, then people, you have to guess who's shit at us. And we get a night vision camera of we know who, like, left with the room and went and shit. Yeah. And nobody else does because you have to do the full thing. And the show is run by heavenly angels. Yes, and atheists.

Produced by atheists. But you have to run by angels, but produced by it. To win the game, basically, you have to be framing people for shits. And you have to make it to the toilet in the middle of them and somehow take a shit that looks like someone else's shit. Exactly. So you're like, I mean, imagine you order like nachos. And then one of the other guys with you is like, oh, nachos, I'll have some.

Now you have indistinguishable shit. Great. Chili cheese, naches. Chili cheese. Okay. Then most of mine are from this one guy, this same blog. So this is a guy's whole dream journal. Not this guy, but this next guy.

Okay. Who has a blog that's a dream journal. And he has a lot of different dreams that we can just do some quick meanings of. So here's the first one from him. So last night, I had a dream that I had Peter Pan-like powers mixed with Super Saian and in the land of Wonderland. The dream was rather intense and I actually hated waking up from it. All I remember is saving the Mad Hatter from these lizard people that were coming up from the sands. The dream started off as the Mad Hatter passed me in his crazy car shaped like a hat.

It was almost Tim Burton-style scenery. Everything was vibrantly colored and beautiful. The beastlies were equally as dangerous and ferocious looking, but it was deaf fun. I can't wait till gaming crosses the border of what reality is, and I get to fully experience worlds like that. Oh, yeah, the metaverse. What does this mean? This means that they... Peter Pan, Super Saiyan Wonderland.

This is Mark Zuckerberg's dream. Well, this is a fairly odd parent's intro music, so... Yeah. Yeah. Peter Pan, Super San, Wonderland. Yeah, here's the next one. I seem to dream of prison frequently. Either way, my fiancé and I were in some prison.

Well, I was in the chow hall, which also resembled my middle school lunchroom, try to get food. When someone comes in and steals two chocolate milks and gives me one, then out of nowhere, a nurse rushes in to come and get me. She seems so frantic saying she had the baby, she had the baby, and it's okay. The baby is okay. I'm thinking, WTF, do you mean she had the baby? She is only nine weeks pregnant. How is the baby still alive? Then I go into seeing my fiance laying on the bed looking passed out.

The nurse walks me over to the baby. The baby looked like something evil. And I woke up sweating, breathing heavy, and terrified. Next slide. This is the picture he attached. Oh, my God. This is a venom baby. That baby does look like something evil.

What does this dream mean? This dream means if you ever see this baby walk the other way. I'll say that. You got to get rid of that baby. Yeah, if you have this baby, no. Uh-uh, uh-uh, uh-uh. I do not want that baby. Here's another dream from this same guy

with his pregnant wife. I went to sleep last night, but before I went to sleep, I started Mind Kampf by Adolf Hitler. Okay. It's like a bazillion 15-minute sections. I got through the first 15 minutes then dozed off,

into a world with a German-sounding narrator. No way to pull my wondering mind and energy into material that I recognize. Just flashes of imagery mixed with swirling colors. I remember getting lost into the idea that we do not experience the same reality

as everything else in the universe. There might be beings that we can't even see because they vibrate at a frequency outside of our what our mind can process. There is colors and experiences that we can't begin to realize with the senses we are equipped with. I remember being lost in the creation

of this thought process until I woke up. I remember dream transitions, just not the dreams. So this guy fell asleep reading mind comp and like transcend it into the DMT. Powerful book, I guess. I've never read a single. word of it.

I read two words of it. The title. Yeah. I didn't even read that. And I said, fuck this. Hell not.

I threw it in what that means. The word, the word. I'll tell you the word I read by. B. Y. Yeah. That's the word I,

language I can read. Straight up, bitch. Here's another one. So I've been doing something different before bed lately. For roughly 20 minutes each night while my eyes are closed, I do a nightly affirmation.

Chris, you will dream tonight. You will remember your dreams. You will be during this time you will discover things you will try a kamehameha wave every night i have used this technique the technique has seemed to work great three out of three six that's right for me that's amazing yeah i love that this guy's obsessed with dragon ball this is a really cool guy yeah uh here's another dream for him the lucid dream i came to consciousness standing on the outside of the old movie theater in lagrange georgia the one i've spent many a night at hanging out two of my friends from that time

poped up, Joseph and Scuba Steve. Seeing them, I knew I was dreaming since they now live two states away. Next so, proceed to walk outside where the daylight is in the sky is sort of duskish and there are people everywhere. Knowing this is a dream, I felt completely comfortable with just trying to come

and how me out wave. I felt like I was forcing it, so it just wasn't happening. I tried a few different ways and couldn't manage it. Even my ability to use telekinesis was effed up. After trying really hard, I think I woke myself up. That must suck to try to do some kind of like telekinesis or some kind of superpower and you're so bad at it that awakes you

up. Yeah. Even in a dream you can't do it. Yeah. Yeah. God damn it. That's a great way to find, no, you're in a dream too. Like, oh, that's scuba Steve.

Yeah. I must be dreaming. I must be dreaming. Scoba Steve. You just can't be real. Yeah. Here's another one. The second dream faded in from the infinite darkness.

No me standing in the mall with my wife in between a bench occupied by two people and a Mary go round. I could hear the ambiance of the faint music in the background and lights were flashing everywhere. As I focused in on the two people sitting on the bench, one of the people became clear. The person was the rapper Mac Miller. He was signing T-shirts and charging 10 bucks for a piece of them.

My wife criticized him for it and walked off. So, what a bitch. So I walked over and sat down on the bench. Yo, man, your CD Macadelic is bomb. I've got the CD in my car. I make music too. I go by Jedi Swift on SoundCloud. He hands me his phone and invites me to open up for his next concert.

I was mind blown, then woke up. Ha ha, weird dreams, right? That's not a weird dream, bro. Next slide. Click this link. Oh, please. This is his SoundCloud. This is his rap.

This is called Yo Anon. Let me get a Bitcoin. And then a Bitcoin wallet address. Okay, first is... Okay, so play it. Turn it up, bro. It's about to go crazy. Better go real fucking difficult.

This is a weed man And I'm on the silk world All you're all I'm connected to your home Would you know? This man is a father This man is a father. This man is a father.

22.95. I think it was. We got it internet. Hey, I was on. Okay. We got it. So this is what played before Mac Miller's concert. Yeah, this is what he opened for Mac Miller. He opened for Mac Miller playing this song. This guy is, I mean, he's certainly a millionaire now. Yeah. He's got to be. 12 years ago. 12 years ago, he's making songs about Bitcoin. If he got a Bitcoin from this song, he probably got 10.

Jedi Swift? What's he doing now? Man, I think I'm going to redo this song. Yeah. So what do you think this Mac Miller music dream means, guys? I think it means that this guy went to heaven. Yeah. Seven years ago was his last song. Oh, he's had a lot of Peter Pan dreams.

He's interested in Peter Pan. Yeah, click Peter Pan here. Let's hear a snippet of Peter Pan. Callie Rich says we need to collaborate. L-E-N. L-E-N-B-T-B-E-T-E-L-E-E-T-E-L-E-E-E-L-E-E-E-L-E-E-E-L-E-E-S-KK-E-E-E-E-S-E-E-E-L-E-E-S-L-E. I don't know. Maybe he said Wonderland?

Oh, it's kind of a young chop beat. I'm so flying that I never land. Damn. Like I'm Peter Pan. That I never land.

That's hard, too. Flying by Peter Pan. I am Peter Pan. I am Peter Pan. All right, that's probably up. That being the first line of the verse. I am Peter Pan.

Okay. He's had so many dreams about Peter Pan that he was like, I've got to write a song. We got these bars off. We talked about a lot of dreams that are kind of cut and dry, very simple. This next one, I think, could be a little complicated. I'm not sure what it could possibly mean.

So let's just read this dream and think about, I mean, just what could this possibly mean? Dream Journal, Day 55. The case court was empty, just meet you and a judge. With a bang in the desk, he said, half custody. He repeated this like hundreds of times until I woke up with a startle. Wow.

Almost reads like a poem. Yeah. These dreams were all poems. And that's Kingdom Hearts James. That's what KJ is. Yeah. So what could this mean? I have no idea.

But that's on this slide. This means this. This is probably about your job. Yeah. You get half custody of the John Deere tractor. You work in, you work in landscaping. Half part-time custodian. I'm going to go through mine at completely breakneck sleeve speed.

Sleep. sleep. We'll do a lightning. I'm going to do a lightning. This guy, I just thought this was a funny title. I'm getting completely hated in my dreams. This dream meaning you are a loser. Yeah, I didn't even go to the body of that one. It's been a minute since I made

these, so I don't really... Yeah, I know. I forgot what most of mine were. Next slide. Dream about eating poop. Weirdest dream ever. I really had to poop before I slept, but I just slept thinking I will shit tomorrow. It's very fucking weird dream. In my dream, I was eating shit with bread or whatever.

with bread or whatever. And I didn't felt disgusted or digested. I felt a bit digusted. So in my dream, he says I didn't feel digusted. I felt a bit digusted. So in my dream, I googled the effects of eating shit. And Google said that poop actually has a lot of protein and is very healthy. Okay, now I know he's definitely doing it.

Wow, it would help me gain muscle and I just eat shit. Wake up disgusted a.F. And feel like throwing up every time I think of it. So what do you guys think that means? Willing to eat poop just to gain muscle? Yeah. I think that you're just going to get strong. I think that's what your dream means.

I think it's probably right. But this person comments, next slide. I had a dream. I ate poop. I had also Googled and it was supposed to be good for me. Parentheses, I'm currently breastfeeding a baby and the baby. I ate all the shit and then was like WTF shit is not good.

This can't be good. I then threw up in a panic that I would make my baby sick worst dream ever. So what the fuck? Shit is not good. A lot of BTF shit is not good. Yeah.

A lot of people are having dreams. In fact, I found a dream interpreter evangelist. Evangelist Joshua O'Reiki. If you can go to the next slide, this is a video of him talking about eating poop

dream dictionary. This is a dream about eating feces. This is Evangelist John TV. Evangelist Joshua TV, sorry. A long intro. So he starts with a thing about, or a bunch of Bible verses. And then just cut to the first part of him talking. In this channel, we talk about prayers.

In this channel, we talk about spiritual things. Is there anything that is bothering you, any dreams, vision, or revelation that you want answers or solutions to? This turner is the right channel to get any entire dream about eating feces. Phicis, you are eating poop, you are eating shit, dream about eating feces, what does it connote? What does it connote? Meaning behind a Christian eating feces or shit or poop? I'm going to tell you more about this revelation. Fisis is a worse material from our digestive system.

If you dream about feces, it means symbolize sin. Corruption, creed, hypocrite, or sickness. So this is one side. So you can stop with him. One side is that this can mean feces is sinful. It's bad. It's greed. But go to the next.

Yeah, we need to hear again. Go to the next slide. And this is a different website I found. Uh-huh. From a Christian. From a Christian. Exactly. So this is a different, the different side of spiritual meeting.

I really hope it doesn't. Yeah, me too. Next slide. What does it mean to dream about feces? It seems like this dream seems disgusting and very bad. But you don't need to worry. In general, the meaning of poop is perfect. Most people say that this is a good sign.

Many people, the meaning of poop is perfect. That is a very pastoral way of saying that. The meaning of poop. Many people think that dreaming of feces shows dirtiness. Something is wrong with your life or you have to get rid of revenge. It can even mean, depending on the feelings and context of your dreams, but the dream of dirt as a whole is a sign of good luck and prosperity. Dreaming of stool is a sign of good luck associated with the acquisition of material,

but because your dream may have certain situations, here's a list to help you find the meaning of feces in dreams. Okay, next slide. Dream of dog poop. The dog is a friend of people. Therefore, the dream meaning of dog poop means it's time to start working with friends. Invest in creating something with them or maybe open your heart to new friends. If you start a business partnership with a friend,

you will most likely be successful and profitable. Okay, next slide. The dream meaning of baby poop can be perfect, but know that the baby must be healthy and well cared for in the dream. If it's dirty, treated wrongly, or messy, this can change its meaning. Everything changes according to the circumstances of the child.

If the baby or child is in good clothes and looks happy, this dream is related to material acquisition, which shows good luck in business or work. But be smart because you have to act wisely, to seize opportunities. For children who are less cared for, we can interpret this as a warning. You must be careful not to experience a broken heart.

If the child has dirty the bed or excreted in the diaper while in bed, this is a sign of prosperity in all respects. If it's in public, it's a sign of great financial success. You must be careful not to experience a broken heart. So far, shit is amazing.

Yeah. Well, poop is perfect. The meaning of poop is perfect. The meaning of poop is perfect. Next slide. Dream of cat poop. The dream meaning of cat drop, shows that something great as possible.

And soon, if you have dreamed of cat feces, this moment promises significant events. It can be good or bad and will have substantial impact on your life. It will be unexpected news. So be careful with surprises that might shake or impress you. If it's terrible, you have to be prepared and be careful to not have an accident that will make hurt or bother you. But if it's right, the chances are that day you will find love, make new friends, win the lottery, or even find money on the road. Whoa. On the road.

You could even find money on the road. Tor. Okay, next one. Dream with the smell of stool. And this is a picture of an upright poop somehow sitting magically in a grass. The dream meaning of the smell of poop is a sign that you will get a refund that you've been lost. Someone might return your money. Dreaming of the smell of stool may represent the transformation of something unwanted into something valuable like money. No matter what, you'll be financially surprised. Whoa. Okay, next. Dream of seeing feces on the road. The most common interpretation is that you will have a pass with

overwhelming regret. This dream can symbolize that you have acknowledged all the mistakes you have made and are ready to become a new person. It's time for spiritual evolution. If you dream of seeing someone dirty with feces, it symbolizes that you are worried about someone who needs your help. So if you dream about somebody being covered in dirty feces

on the road, on the road, you need to find them in real life and talk to them about this. Is everything okay, man? I had a dream that you were covered in shit. Hey man. You had a dream. I had a dream. covered in your own food. Is everything cool at home with... Is your life okay? Is your girlfriend mad at you? Are you and Jennifer all good?

Because I had a dream of you covered in shit on the road. Do you need attention? Bro. Do you need love? Bro, let's go play laser tag. Dude, I know you need this. I know you need this. I know you. I dream of you covered in shit.

Okay. You're wondering why I took you out to dinner. I had a dream that you were covered. Dream of eating poop. The dream of eating poop is certainly very disgusting. However. other ones. However, if you feel normal in the dream, then this means good luck in every aspect

of your life. Wow. Every aspect. But if you feel disgusted while eating feces, it means you will experience something that is bothering. No. Yeah. So it's either fortune in every single aspect of your life or something may bother you. Boop is black and white. Remember that you have control in your life and you must not be forced to do things that you don't approve of. Fight and everything will be excellent. So this is what eating shit and a dream can tell you. Okay. And then right here at the end, I just have a, there's four more on one slide. Dream of collecting feces. The dream meaning of collecting dirt. I like that they keep saying dirt. They keep calling it dirt. Symbolizes something delicious. You will have luck and wealth.

It is an excellent time to take a few risks in financial matters. It can be the form of investments, projects, and new ventures. Your luck will give you big profits. Dream of cleaning feces. The dream meaning of cleaning feces is a metaphor for saying that you are cleaning your soul. You have decided that you need to change that you no longer want to make the same mistakes. Now you get rid of everything wrong for you. Congratulations. This one's mine, man. This is me. I shitted my pants and my dream. Remember I said I was trying to clean. I'm trying to change my pants and stuff. You are a safer person now. Oh my God. You were safe. I'm cleaning my soul. Touching feces. Your soul will be clean. However, some people believe that dreaming about touching dirt,

feces or poop symbolizes financial gain or the acquisition of money. So basically all of these are great. Same with school and bed. The thing is about poop is that if you dream about it, it seems like 90% of the time it's going to it means that you're about to make a lot of money. They say poop is money. Or they say time is money. Yeah, they don't say poop. But time makes poop. Well, that's true. It takes some time to make poop

of us all. Time will make poop of us all. Okay, that's it. I think I had more things but it's been so long so I made this that I completely forgot. That's okay. Yeah. All right, guys, this Saturday, May 18th, we are in. We are in Philadelphia. I know I've been saying it a bunch of times, but now it's actually upon us. The

pre-sale tickets, guys, are sold out but there will be some tickets at the door, and I believe door time is 7.30, but let me... 745. Let me just confirm that real quick. That's probably not right. Yeah, doors at 7.30 show at 8. So show up early if you want to come.

You didn't get a ticket. You probably will be able to get in. And here's what I'll say. Also, if you're not in Philadelphia and you want to see us live, I made a little page on our website where you can tell us what city you're in, what city you want us to come to a live show. and so we can plan our next shows. So go to Swagpoop.com slash poll.

That's P-O-L-L-L. If you go to Swap Poop.com slash P-O-L-E, you will see Caleb's poll. I put that page on there, too. My bad. So there's a little survey and you'd be able to... And allow the cookies when they show and it asks. You're going to need to allow cookies.

And look at this. It's a simple little form. We haven't come to your city. And this is the type of answer we don't want you. This is the type of answer we have been getting mostly. What do you mean? We have been getting Poop City, Poop Mountain. We haven't even posted it or done anything with it yet.

I've been saying a lot of stuff in the poll. I've been sending a lot of things. You can only send one thing. I've been opening up incognito tabs and I've been breaking. Don't flick me. It has every type of protection afforded. I didn't throw it because you didn't flick. All right, guys.

Bye, gang. Something is different about you, Pat. You look stronger and scarier, the average. You look kind of werewolf. Yeah, you do look wolfish. Do I? Wolf in. Yeah. Oh, Joe just walked in.

Get out. Joe, he has COVID. Tell him you have COVID. Get out. Joe, you have to leave. What? How did this happen? Instantly.

It's just stupid as we started. The second we started. There's no way that Alex didn't have it. Because he, when we left for Atlanta, he was like, speak of the devil, is that him? Oh.

Everybody's here. We're recording right now. What is he? Why is he walking around like this? I think he's just afraid of COVID. What is he looking for? Obviously, not that afraid. He walked into the building.

Hello. This is so crazy. Pat, stop. You're laughing in a way that is beaming the COVID directly at their heads. Yeah. This is a powerful, no, you can't use your arms. It doesn't come out of your arms and legs, man. Oh, actually sprayed.

Oh, and he spritz them now. They're still here, by the way. That's fine. Tell Joe to get out of your arms. This is two episodes we've recorded in a row where he's just sitting in the office. Just tell him to leave. He can't get COVID now. If he sits down and plays Siv 6, I will do a bazooker.

And he's running. Why is he walking like that? Do you think it's on the ground?