Podcast About List - Ep. 294 - The GooBlasters

Episode Date: June 12, 2024

GooBlasters is a paranormal entertainment podcast episode, developed by Jubio and produced by America's Sullivan The Frog Enterprises. The episode premiered on the Podcast About List Channel on June 12, 2024. It was broadcast internationally by YouTube and Spotify worldwide. The show's original hosts Cameron Fetter, Caleb Pitts and Patrick Doran, used elements of the scary method to test the validity of rumors, myths, movie scenes, lists, Internet videos, and news stories. Subscribe to us on YouTube youtube.com/@PodcastAboutList Buy tickets to our latest live show https://www.swagpoop.com/shows Get extra premium and Gun City RPG episodes at https://www.patreon.com/podcastaboutlist Follow us https://www.swagpoop.com/links

Have you ever wanted to ask Patrick a question about the history of the world? Well, now you can thanks to the Patrickpedia. Call the number on your screen and leave a voicemail with your question. 929-376-949. And now enjoy Goo Blasters. I'm not tricking you. Hunter Biden is being sent to prison for life for simply hitting pokey and looking at his phone.

It's truly, it's so disgusting what, like, okay, so first of all, they get Trump on charges, right? But now they think it's got to be fair. Trumped up charges. I think he's also innocent as well as Biden. And let's think about it. Mr. Hunter. And let's think about this.

Who's coming after Hunter? The hunters. No, well, no. Probably the prey. Biden. No. He is being hunted by prey. They should call him hunting

because they're getting revenge because he's been winning his entire life. Think about it, man. He's fucking models. Uh-huh. He's smoking some different things. Yeah. Stuff that these...

These fucking jury members have never... If you made every single person on a jury sit there and smoke crack, they'd say let him go right now let him go if you want to be a jury in a fucking drug possession case

you should have to fucking do the drug because then you say who could stop themselves from smoking pokey this is amazing this is unbelievable everyone on the jury needs to be a guy with an open mind

yes you should have to go through everything Hunter Biden's have to go to have to go through to judge him you should live a year in his shoes yes you should be you should have to have sex with models and smoke crack and be the president's son for one year for one year for one year that's the only way that you can be so how many people are in a jury 150 yeah so by the time we even get through

also that's the other thing stop getting these angry stop getting these angry bastards up in this jury man get some calm get some temper headed mild mannered uh working men now that would be an interesting movie yeah 12 calm guys 12 calm guys sitting around saying you know I could go either way I understand him. I understand both sides. Somebody needs to make that movie because we have a serious lack of empathy in the justice system.

We do. We really do. We do. Because if I'm on that, dude, it would have been a hung jury. And by the way, also the defendant's hung. I don't know if you've seen his penis,

but it's quite large. They were posting that. And crack actually shrinks your testicles and your penis. Crack shrinks basically everything about your body. Yeah. So the fact that he is so big when literally having,

doing crack a day. Yeah. He should be smoking it every day if he's that tall. He smoke it every day and he's still that tall. Anyway, that's what I'm saying. That just tells you

how big he was when he was born or how cool he is. And also just how much he can withstand. Yeah. And he looks fucking amazing. He's a modern marvel. I can't say this enough. And also, you should not be,

if I get arrested for some shit like that, here's my defense. Your Honor, that was the old me. Mm-hmm. You should not be able to go to prison for the old you. They should not send him to jail They should send him to a science lab

And study him scientifically Because I read that the amount of crack that he smoked Normally would turn a person into the thing From Fantastic Four Yes Or and he remained normal He remained magazine cover material Instead of an ugly mug orange bitch

Easily top five Speaking of ugly mug orange bitch Who man The other guy Throw it out there bro The other guy just got arrested too Mr. Trump Donnie

We talked about this last week Or two weeks ago or something Yeah. This is old fucking new. Yeah, but he said, I mean, that's just a Mr. Oliver, John Oliver, if you're watching. Yeah. You didn't make the connection. No.

Also, what's it? The thing didn't get arrested. He's a hero. There's a story that Cameron could tell you about. I consider Mr. D.T. to be a thing. The thing? I don't think he is a person. I don't think he's a person.

I honestly think that the second that he said that shit about grabbing Pussies, he basically relinquished his grasp on the human race. And as far as I'm concerned, he's nothing. He's an orange alien. He might. as well be an alien to me, which an alien to me is not worth anything. No. Kill it. I don't like when people say pussy. I think it's really gross. It is gross. I like when people say vagina. Say vagina. Can we just be medical here and call and call and list the specific

parts when you're talking about them. My slip. A slip. Don't say slip. List the actual parts of the vagina. The slit, the top, the middle. And the outs. Let's be, let's be biological about this whole thing. There's the hole. The hole. The slip. The slip. the outside the outs the good part yeah and then the button on the top that does nothing and then the back and there's a back that i've never seen the back of it that's a butt the front the front is also a kind of a butt a front butt mm-hmm the back of it which part is the one that peas the whole thing peas the whole thing peas basically pee comes pee saturates out of it like the top of a of a cave so it's like uh it's like a it's just kind of just kind of just kind of just

kind of condenses on the top and then falls out. Okay. Yeah. All right. That's interesting. I never knew that. It's interesting. It is interesting.

It's really interesting. It's actually interesting to me. Yeah. So basically what females have, they have, would they pee like a shower head where it's multiple, it's about 50 to 60 different discrete streams of water that come out. A man pees like when you take off the shower and it goes, yes. And it can drill a hole in the wall. Yeah, that one spike of water.

The spike in water. And if you stop it up, it'll start coming out of other parts of a man's body. Yeah. Like that scene in the Mario movie, which I just rewatched. What happens in Mario movie? He pees, wait, he gets his, he gets his penis corks. He gets his penis corked and he pees out of his butt is what you're telling me.

It happens in the Mario movie. What happens in the Mario movie that? What? If a house is a penis, or if a house has a penis, if a sink is a penis and a house is a body, And yes, that is exactly what happens. Okay. Because they try to fix a sink and they stop up the sink and then that water starts coming up

out of the tiles and out of the shower head and they have to plug up every single hole. Okay. So my logic is thinking, well, that would happen if I plugged up the top of my penis, the mouth of my penis. You didn't explain that this is a sink in a house. That's because I thought everybody's already seen this movie. If I want, you just want attention for seeing this movie again. That's what's going on here. This has nothing to do we were talking about.

You just want to let everybody know that you watched it again. You want a gold star that you can jump into and go. go do do do do do do do he doesn't sing the song the song just plays yeah i know i'm singing it he said you can go i'm doing a cappella it's not very good you would not make it a fucking day do they have the star in the movie i would make it a day they do get the star at the end at the end that's boring as fuck bro you have that's i'm saying you get the star in the end you get the star in the middle of the level in the real game yeah and you become invincible it's a bullshit movie it's a bullshit movie it's a bullshit more than once i didn't even mean to see it the

second time i swear to god i did not mean to want to watch it. We put it on. I swear to God. We put it on. And we were like, well, watch five minutes of this. What are you talking? Why don't you watch five minutes of the Mario movie? The first five minutes of the Mario movie you wanted to watch? Because he's just in, to laugh, because it's funny. He just is living in Brooklyn.

It's funny for five minutes. But then you get into all this they call it magical realism where he's living in a mushroom world. So it's like, it's like Juno Diaz. It's very Juno Diaz. It's very, very Juno Diaz. Murakami. Very Murakami. I would say that it's almost Pans Labyrinth-esque.

Wow. Yeah. And it's bullshrap. Bullshrap. Bullshrap. What's shit and crap? Oh. Yeah.

This is a plumbing term. No, yeah. This is what plumbers say with the stuff the backs of toilets. And also, it's canon in that movie that they like being plumbers. Like, they prefer to be plumbers over heroes. At the end of the movie, they just become plumbers in a fucking, they can become plumbers and mushroom kingdom where the craps are probably way more disgusting because they come out of a

mushroom butt. Yeah. If I was in the scenario where I was a plumber and I got transported to a magical world and I could only save the day because of my plumber skills I knew how to go through pipes. They were like oh nobody, you're the only person who could save the day because you were a plumber. Yeah. I would kill myself.

I would think that I would be in some type of I would think I was in the game from Michael Douglas. Absolutely. Absolutely. Because why would they, why would a fucking plumber? I went to another world. We needed a plumber. We need a plumber so bad. Nobody could do this job. It's so hard.

Oh, you did a great job. You saved the day. You know how to be a plumber. You should stay our plumber. I would say, I'm trying to smell something fishy here. It seems like I'm being pranked a little bit. I would completely think they were punking me. Yeah, the beautiful princess.

Oh, I need a plumber so bad. That movie's awesome. That movie's awesome. The game, too, right? There's a princess. I think all women are princesses. I think a few of them are. Only few?

The people members of the royal family, earn the title through bloodline. Loyalists. So not the married-in ones. Loyalus says what? Hell no. Hell no. I'm loyal to princesses. Me too. I don't care about the king at all. The king is a bastard. Honestly, fuck the queen, too.

Chill the fuck out. Princesses. The princesses become queens. When a princess becomes a queen, she gets crusty. That's true. That's facts. An angel loses its wings. Literally compare a princess to a queen any day of the week. I'll compare one right now. The princess is winning. Isn't King, Dying? He just got a new portrait.

And people are saying it's too red. No. Let me see it. Do you guys remember that Obama portrait that came out where he put him in a flower world? Oh, yeah. And everybody's like, oh, this is whack. It's the only cool one, man. The Charles one is cool as fuck, too.

It looks like a painting from Eldon Ring. Really? Yeah. Let me see it. I put him in a red world of fire. Let me see it. Maybe hell? Is that what it looks like hell a little bit?

It looks more like a red world of fire. Charles Schwabloggin? Charles portrait. Wait. Oh, they just vandalized it. Whoa. With Gromis. Wallace, don't you dare start it. Don't.

Don't. I don't tell me. You do know because you spend a second to think and then you say the wrong one. No, I can never remember the other guy's name. Look what they did to him. Wow. They completely obliterated him. Isn't that a sick portrait, though?

That is a crazy portrait. That looks like the guy painting it was like, this man has blood on his hand. literally a painting from Eldon Ring. I think it's like, it's cool. It'd be cool if he was like a movie villain. Like they fuck this guy over. He is a movie. I don't know.

I mean, they don't do anything bad except chill. He was on the island? No, that was his dad. Oh, okay. Right?

I don't know. Who's the one that's the one that was like good friends with Saville? Probably all of them. I think that's probably also his dad or his brother or some crap. Yeah. Oh yeah. I think the older guy was the pito guy. Yeah.

Who looked like he was dead. It was the queen's, The guy with the crazy purple eyegas. He was a noncer. Yeah. I think this guy's not so nice either. This portrait could exist inside of his eyebags. Yeah.

They zoom in a little. They used the pigment from his eyegs to paint this. They had him sitting by. This is like when they opened the locker in men in black. And then it's like you zoom out. It's all this whole painting exists. Oh, yeah, yeah. Did they ever do a zoom in in that movie to see who is exactly living in that cat's

necklace. I think at the end of Men in Black 2 they zoom out and the whole galaxy

is a marble similar to that one. It's all about the whole milky way. Yeah. Yeah. At the end of the day

men of black is about necklaces. And with it zooming out and it's all taking place inside a molecule or something.

Yeah. Every single every single a post-credit scene. Like the Simpsons intro. Yeah. It should all

like in Cranpus or it's all in a snow globe. That should be the I love that. Is that true? Yeah. That's how that ends?

Well, it's not, it wasn't that it was always in a snowboard. They got, they get put into a snowboard. Oh, okay. Okay, okay. I thought you were saying that it's a twist ending where it's like, well, this whole movie took place in a snow globe. Well, they're like, oh, now we can't escape. There's a blizzard.

We can't get out of our, like, neighborhood. But there's no crampus anymore. At the reveal as they went into a snow globe. That movie is awesome, man. I need to rewatch that movie. The only thing I don't like about that movie is those gingerbread men. Those guys are, a little bit too Shrek.

Yeah. It's a very... Oh, I watched Shrek as well. You did watch Shrek. It was awesome. Shrek is holding up. Shrek is holding up majorly. Yeah.

But poor donkey does not want to have sex with his dragon and gets forced to have sex with a dragon. I thought he does. He's not there. He's trying to escape the dragon. He's like, he's like those guys that are secretly into big women. She's not a woman. Yeah, she is.

She's a dragon. She's a woman dragon. He's like one of those guys. She got red lips. That's why she's a woman. woman. How does he even have sex with her? She's got beautiful eyelashes. He jumps in. He dives in the

pussy? He dive in, full dive. Does he hold his breath or does he breathe it all in? Damn, my man. He's in there like he's got a vacuum mask. It's like a gas mask with a vacuum at the end of the reverse gas mask that shoots whatever's outside right in your face. He has a C-Pap

and he plugs it into her things. He plugs a C-Pap into the dragon's butt. And he sits there and falls asleep. And that's how they That's really quite nasty. He has like 18 kids with her. Yeah, and they're funny as fuck. I've only seen the first two.

There was, I remember I had this Shrek toy when I was a kid, and it came, it was donkey, and it came with one of his little hybrid children, and all the Shrek toys were scented, and it was bad smells, and the donkey boy smelled like barbecue. How's that bad? That one was the good one.

The other one was a flour that smelled like farts. It was like Bertie bots. Yeah. Birdie bots is good, man. Birdie bots, I said half a half a half. That's like my favorite candy. I sit there and I eat that shit all day. Yeah, but it smelled like barbecue.

I remember that. I actually do remember liking the booger flavor of birdie burgy bots when I was a kid. I thought it was pretty good, actually. Yeah. The booger one? I didn't have never had been boozzled. What? We're talking about birdie bots, bro.

You've never had it. I've ever been bean boozled? I thought birdie bots. It's basically the same thing, but we're talking about birdie bots. We get my grandpa one and he threw up. Yeah. Yeah. I've seen that video that kid eating one and throwing up.

They're really nasty. I didn't like them so much as a child. They have to be, I would say. The thing is normal jelly beans aren't very good. What are you talking about? Not my favorite. They're not great. I love jelly beans.

The normal ones, no. If you get to, what was I was talking about a jelly bean? I love jelly beans. I remember we were staying with your in-laws and they put the thing of jelly beans. They gave us. It was jelly beans. He ain't like four packages. I remember that. Yeah. They had a thing of grabbing them from other rooms. We came home. We came. Yeah, I stole Joe's out of his room because I love you. They were the tropical ones. They're my favorite. The tropical ones are better. They're the best

ones. I remember. We came home that night and I thought that we were in someone else's house at first. And you still hate the beans? I was messed up. And we came home and then I texted Cameron at like three in the morning. And I was like, are these J beans for me? You said, are these J beans? Are these J beans for me? I think it was just a text that said, can I eat these jelly beans? No,

no, I can probably find it. No, they are decorative jelly beans. Let's see what the exact one. You know how like some people like have like decorative candy around the house? Not like, I don't think so. I have never heard of decorative candy.

It's like they have like candy in like a candy bowl around their house. What kind of fucking fruity loop house did you live in where people had decorative candy? I don't know what I'm trying to say here. Like, like, you know, like, if you ever got to, like, an old person's house and they have, like, the jar of, like, hard candies? They'll have nasty candy, but you can eat it.

They're not going to be mad than you. This is the wording that Pat texted me. It was at 204 a.m. Okay. He texted me, bro, can I touch the jelly beans? Oh, wait, this is 2.26 a.m. Can I touch the jelly beans? I truly, I truly did think, like,

these were just here these are just here and they're not can I touch the jelly beans broke and I touched the jelly beans I ended up eating like half the bag dude I ate like they were in a bag

yeah and you still thought I was decorative in a bag I thought that it was like because I was sleeping in the basement and I just thought that it was like basement beans yeah these are these are a

couple of basement beans this is a look I haven't stayed in that many southern houses yeah well it's pretty much it's a requirement it's a yeah I thought that well I didn't realize

that this was southern hospitality I was dealing with as a northerner we don't have that we have you were used to northern aggression yeah

yeah exactly where they put out the beans and if you touch them they fucking northern they start a war

you can't touch the beans up here yeah you see beans in someone's house see beans down south were very hospitable you get them out of a big

you get them out of a big yeah it was supposed to be a gunshot I don't know how I didn't a fart did a fart you get shot with a fart gun

if you touch someone's beans up here a home isn't a home in the south until they have a very racist little statue that has a hand out with jelly beans in it and then you take some man and then you feel right at home and then the statue's hand goes

and the weight changes and you hear it rumbling and then the real fun yeah you gotta run away from a wrecking ball that's rolling down the hill remember that wrecking ball music video why does Miley Cyrus get hated on so hard

I don't know this song is fucking disgusting I came in a wrecking ball you You are purposefully Misreading the lyrics of that You're trying to twist reality To fit your, to paint your picture

What is it? I came like a wrecking ball I came in like a wrecking ball I came in her like a wrecking ball She comes into the frame On what? A ball. I came in her with my freckin balls No

My freckled balls My freckled balls I came in her with my freckled balls That's not what she says at all Miley Cyrus My reckless balls They're not no My wrinkles balls, wrinkless.

Rinkless because she's young. Wait, I don't agree. Caleb, what did you say? She doesn't have wrinkly balls because she's young. She's not old. Your balls aren't smooth. I think that's your first wrinkle. My balls are smooth.

Your balls are your first wrinkle in your life. First of all, you're old. Yeah. Second of all, your balls are wrinkled. If you want to do a test, whatever test you want to... You pumped them up. Let's pause recording right now. Let's see them.

We stopped the recording and my balls have no wrinkles. They're spotlessly clean. They were deeply wrinkled like a baby dog. No wrinkles. It looked like a raisin. No hair. When a baby dog is born in the first 10 seconds, it looks like a human raisin. No.

Is that true or is that false? That sounds true? I got to answer that. Is that true or is that false? I'm not the expert on this. My balls do not look like a baby dog born. You guys see those mice that they do lab experiments to give them waves? No.

No, but I'm intrigued. Wait. They give them like. Yeah. Like wavy hair? Like wavy hair? On a mouse? Like wave?

They like, yeah, like mice with waves. Well, this is not. That's a naked rat. They basically, it might be, maybe it's the, I remember when they put the ear on the mouse.

That's wrong. Yeah. That is right. That is not. That is right. You cannot be. That mouse can enjoy music from a human perspective

for the first time. But you pretend to be an animal lover. You're saying all the time I don't pretend to be an animal lover. You do pretend. And yet you like the mouse ear. No, I'm an animal hater. I want them to suffer.

Really? I want all them to have ears on them so I can go up and say, I hate you, I hate you, I hate you. Don't say that. I'm going to try and find the wavy mice. I need to see the wavy mouse. I don't think that they should be doing experiments on mice. If there's going to be any animal it's doing it on, it's going to be a mouse.

Yeah. They got that one right, man. Mice are fucking cool. They're chill. Yeah. I have mice in my house every single day. What? Damn.

Show me the waves. His mouse is wavy. Damn. Wow. Ah. 360 wave mouse that's actually kind of sick that's nice

there was yeah oh here it is this is the picture I was thinking of specifically god damn they breed this into the mice or are they putting them in a wave cat I don't know anything about it they're born in a wave cat

satin mouse for sale 60 dollars and 99 cents 60 yeah that's a lot for a mouse 61 mouse for a fucking mouse well a satin mouse not just pretty nice I'm not going to lie yeah okay this is taking me to a website called black coal miners.com that is a white screen it's black coal miners dot com black coal miners. This is what happened when I clicked on buy a mouse

can you go to that independently of like like we'll just look up black coal miners.com okay what do you even do with a satin mat you turn into the world's tiniest little rug you can fucking pet it man yeah this is a website secret website wow okay that's interesting but it doesn't have a password or anything there's nothing that you can access completely blank Well, that's unlucky. Click Inspect Element. Wow, these mites are beautiful. What did you guys do for Puerto Rican day?

Oh, I didn't know that was happening. I didn't know either, and I wore my only shirt that says Puerto Rico on it. And I walked around all day, and people definitely were looking at me like, damn. That was Sunday, right? Yeah. I got on the bus, and thank God I wore the shirt, I would have been the only person without a shirt that said Puerto Rico on it. Yeah. They go crazy.

I didn't know that they have a frog mascot. Yeah. Puerto Rico does? Who is he? I don't know. But I see him everywhere like him. El Jumpo. El Jumpo.

That's his name. El Jumpo. The Leaper. Was it Coqui or something? Is that you said that in Spanish? The little drink? No. No, the frog.

What's that word for frog in Spanish? What's that little drink that is like rum and milk? I don't know. That shit's good. I think it's also called Coquie. Coquie. That looks pretty good. I didn't ever have anything for Puerto Rico Day.

I love Puerto Rico. I love Puerto Ricans. If I had to switch. sides to any other country i think i would probably head to porto yeah they're cool because you can have a parties are awesome the parties are amazing they do go crazy they go crazy i love how white the t-shirts are i like the way they act on people's birthdays i think that it's an amazing culture and i'd love to be a part of it frankly yeah yeah let me join and i try i did an attempt let me join it i did an attempt on accident wearing that shirt tap me in let me chill and I was waiting outside of a restaurant

and I had the Puerto Rico shirt on this was like five hours before the parade started but they had the police line up and there's like cops there so I just looked like a Puerto Rican guy who got there way too early yeah yeah or maybe a guy who married into a Puerto Rican family yeah and just was like kind of overcompensating and going really really early to the parade yeah and I felt cool undercover undercover investigating you see that video fun Speaking of the undercovers, you see that video like the undercover cop arresting the dude and like he's in like a full shiasty and everything. He's like wearing like Nike Tech and stuff. It's crazy. The cop is like fully kidded out. You'd think that they would have cut onto that sooner to do to dress like that. Yeah. Eric saw me the other day outside of the restaurant and was like came and got me because he didn't know I was waiting to like go to the restaurant. He thought that I was a undercover cop waiting to give them a ticket for parking a call. in front of a driveway and he like came to come check on it and it was me wow yeah which made me feel pretty cool yeah yeah it means you have swag it means that i dress you have natural swag

you have an amazing outfit on it means you have natural laid back swag it doesn't mean that i was maybe looking like a cop overcompensating a little bit and trying to look a little bit to uh 2019 yeah it is funny when you do spot and undercover i can't i'm not very good at it man i can't spot the car because they... When they turn on the sirens, it's easy. Yeah, exactly. Then I go, I point to my wife, I say, I don't know if you notice

that's an undercover cop right there that just pulled over. We saw smoke shop get raided. Yeah, really? With a bunch of cops. Yeah, when was this? Like last week in L.A. Yeah, two weeks ago.

And it was ripe, and I walked by it and I had been considering going in. And then at the last second, I was like, you know what? I'm not going to go in. And right then, as if something had happened, a bunch of cops came up, and they went in.

All their cars pulled up. It was like six or seven cars all pulled up and they all got out and they were like speedwalking in. I wonder what they were doing. Shutting it down, man. Smoking. They were.

Do you have raw. Cracking down on that, on the green. They're cracking down on green. Green. And I think Zen is going out. I think Zen is gone pretty soon. Yeah, I haven't been finding it anywhere. It's pretty sad, man.

I haven't been finding it anywhere and I've been finding this other stuff called Lucy. Lucy the gum? That's all I've been seeing is Lucy. Yeah, yeah, it's not a good. I went to, I went to go buy some the other day, and the guy went, I got nose-ins, man. I only have this stuff.

And I was like, I don't want to put Lucy in my mouth. Not yet. Not even Lucy Lou? Not even. Come on. If she was small, I'll put her in your mouth. No, that'll ruin the, that'll ruin the, I did find a story about her. About Lucy Lou?

pertaining to the episode. Well, you can tell me that later then. Okay. Yeah, I don't need to hear all that right now. We can wait a little bit before I hear all that. You don't like it. But she goes in the mouth? A story about having a tiny Lucy Lou in your mouth?

It's pretty much exactly that. It's actually Stranger Than Fiction that you said that. I'm getting very, very excited. That's crazy. I need to rewatch that movie. Stranger than Fiction. I thought you're going to say Charlie's Angels. I were going to say Lucy Lou movie as well.

I didn't know which one you were going to say though. What movies is she in besides Charlie? Charlie's Angels. And Kill. Ballistics X versus Server. What the crap is that? It's like one of the worst movies ever. Oh, I love bad movies.

Yeah. It's her and Antonio Banderas, I think. And they're spies. There's spies battling each other. So Mr. and Mrs. Smith. I've heard that it's very, very bad. Okay, so then I'm probably going to enjoy it. Because I like, I don't know what it is about bad movies that I actually enjoy.

Yeah. So bad it's good. It's like, I think what it is, I can watch it and I can imagine everything being opposite and it being, then I watch kind of a better movie in my head. I go, that's good. Mm-hmm. That's really good. If they did this, this would be cool.

Yeah. Right. Well, should we... Should we... Should we... Should we dive in? Let's dive right in. Like Lucy Lou?

And roll the intro. Who are the goo blasters? Patrick Doran, Caleb Pitts, and Cameron Fetter. Between them, they have over a thousand years of experience investigating bone-chilling ghosts. They're joined by Jubio,

who is a scaredy cat, and Hispanic. When the ghosts get bone-chillin' it's time to call the goo blasters. Let's take a look at some of the world's most bone-chilling ghosts. Are they Fear of the Year award winners? Or just smelly, like a bunch of hot poop? You're watching goo blasters.

Boo. We scared you. Wait, what do you have? I don't know. Just keep going. I'm just looking. Yep. We're having...

I saw a ghost. That actually scared me. We are having the summer scaries. Mm-hmm. Yeah. So basically we did bust Misters. We figured we like busting. Yeah.

Busting makes us feel good. So why not goo blasters? Gu blasters. So let's blast something. Because people, this is the second scariest time of year. The first is obviously All Hallows Eve, you know, Satanic holiday invented by pagans to destroy Christianity. And for you, the second scariest is Pride Month. Exactly.

Because similarly, people are walking. walking around dressed like skeletons. Yeah. Sparkly skeletons. They jump out of cars and scare me all the time. Uh-huh. And it really, really worries me.

Yeah. And you go to every single bar and everybody's dressed up like a different scary villain. Corella DeVille, very, very common outfit that I've been seeing all the month. So, yeah,

so we decided let's tackle. Cipher from the Matrix. Yeah, seeing a lot of, a lot of cipher from the Matrix. Yeah. Zabumafoo. It's a good guy. Well, yeah.

wearing any clothes. I've seen a lot of submafus around. You have not seen any ZabummaFu. I've seen a few of Bumafou. In my neighborhood, you can't get, you can't get enough. You know what I've been seeing

a lot of amazing costumes for this month? What? Reno 9-1-1. A lot of amazing Reno 911 costumes this month. New boot goofing. Yeah. A lot of people do boof-in. Yeah.

A lot of people's a Buma-Foo. I haven't seen it single as Buma-Foo. All right. I'm going to keep pushing back on this. I haven't seen any. He's a, the crat brother, sure, I've seen several wild crats. But Zabumaboo? No.

Why were their names the crats? Because they were born that way. Yeah, that's odd. Born this way, Lady Gaga. I've seen a lot of gagas. I've seen a lot of gagas. I've seen some gagas in the damn cold cuts section. Yeah.

Of the grocery store, like her meat dress. Oh, shit. Well, that wasn't cold cuts. It was steak. Mrs. Meaty. But in the section, there's meat there as well. They should have called her that. Mrs. Meaty?

Mrs. Meade, they should have called her that. Who's they? Perez. Perez Hilton. Perez Hilton should have called her Mrs. Meaty. He was on Mr. Meaty. He was funny as fuck on that show. Yeah, he's one of the puppets.

He was funny as fuck. I can't lie. So basically we already busted all the Misters. So why not blast some goo? So now we're going to move on to, because urban legends go beyond just how much does this thing weigh. Does this way 40? They go into the world of, does this really?

exist. And so that's what we're kind of talking about today is, does this really exist? Is this ghost kind of a real thing? Does Lucy Lou exist? This kind of stuff we're going to tackle head on with no fear. And I am somebody who's prone to getting scared and very easily startledly frightened. And today, I'm going to hold my breath the whole episode so it doesn't happen. I saw a ghost. You're right? It does scare me. The piano keys. That is a scary. gorge. I'm hungry. That one scared me.

Okay, who wants to goop? I can goob. Who was to go first? Yeah, I don't have that many. But I do have this story that I found. What is it, bro? Masturbating bathtub ghost

caught on film. And look at that wireframe right there. This past Saturday night while investigating the Murdoch-Wittany House in Winchenden, Massachusetts, we caught footage of what we believe as a spirit sprawled out

in an old bathtub. while we were investigating him it appears he was also investigating himself Wow so let me just say also that Goo Blasters were an organization that is we're devoted to blasting the goose We get rid of them Get them out of here

We want to blast these gus to back To last week But look at this goo He's blasting himself He's blast us We don't know that We don't know that How would we blast this goo

Well from the front I guess we'd have to take it head on I would sneak up behind him You would sneak up from behind him You would sneak up from behind? He clearly has a weapon that's ready to spray. Also, that doesn't look too much like a bathtub to me. Oh, I'm actually seeing the outline of the bathtub now.

Okay, here's my pitch, though. We can't be sure that this goo is for certainly touching himself. He's not... This could be somebody checking a watch. Or adjusting. This is how I check... He's full. Everybody, all of us get in trouble for adjusting.

He's full and he's doing this. Once in life, adjusting on the bus. We've all been there. Yeah. Oh, your honor, I was adjusting. Adjusting. Adjusting. I was just adjusting.

Your honor, you've adjusted. We've all adjusted. You've probably adjusted. Sorry, I didn't have the, the pulpit in front of me where I could do the thing in front of it. Come on. Hide the adjust. I'm thinking that maybe this goo ate too much. And he's always, oh.

That's good thinking. And also, how can we not know that all ghosts kind of are overeating things? Thanksgiving style, because that's what makes him go. One of the most famous goats. Yes. Yes. There we go. Anyway, I'd defeat him by sucking him up with a protein pack. Okay. Protein pack.

Yeah, you like the goo blasters use? Oh, they do use protein packs. Yeah. Don't cross my cream. Can you imagine how good that would feel to cross your cream stream? Yeah. Crossing your cream with another guy. Crossing your cream from your protein pack?

I wouldn't know whether to look at the streams or look in his eyes. That would be a tough time. choice you have to make in the moment because it doesn't last that long. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. All right, what are we, what are we saying? Is this, is this scare formed? We didn't, I don't think we found a way to boost this. We did not. I think it's has to, by default, it has to be scare firm because I've given out some, uh, it's scary, first of all, but also I, none of my, uh, theories can really be scare firm. No, we don't have, we don't have a method to boost, boost. Yeah, so this has got to be scare firm. This is scared. Okay. This is

scare-firmed. So this ghost has been this goo has been scare-firmed. We couldn't blast it. All right, let's see the next one. This is called, this is from paranormalform.net and this is, the title of this is too much information. And this is something that I believe happened. This is a story that somebody's saying.

So you think this is already scared-for, you're pre-scare-firmed. I'm pre-scarmed that this was a paranormal occurrence. These are all paranormal. These are all paranormal. It's not about boosting whether it's truce or if it's false firmed, it's about can we boost this goose out of the hoose, or

are we scare firm, do we got to run away, turn tail, and we can't kick its tail? Well, this one, this one I think that a ghost was involved. The way that this person makes a sound is that there was no ghost involved. I would hope a ghost was involved. But this, this one, hmm, I have quite a few, but

will name only one. L.O.L. A guy I used to know, a big guy, was exploring in a bend building in the woods somewhere when he had to take an emergency number two. Somehow in the process of finishing up, he slipped and fell in it. The poo. He had to exit the woods and drive home in just his underwear. With the exception of telling y'all this story, I could have done well without knowing all that.

Funny though, TMI, L.O.L.O. Now, do you think maybe in some Rube-Goldian way? Of course. A ghost made him trip in his own two. Of course. How would this happen? Why would a guy trip in his own two of his own accord? Who would do that?

Nobody just drops dead and falls over in two. No. No one would drop into their two and drive home nude. Everybody avoids two at all cost. But he was in the woods, so it could have just been a lowly stick that he tripped on. But he's not running around while he's towing. No. No.

Good point. He's standing still. He's two feet planted on the ground. Who's walking and two in the woods? Yeah. I mean, maybe an animal. No, even an animal stays still. Well, no.

I see horses do that all the time. Do you see horses do that all the time? Yeah, they two when they walk. That's a good point. Yes, all the time, dude. I chill with horses and shit. All right. A human is a higher order than a horse.

Well, that's for certain. A human knows not to walk. That's for certain. Okay, if this was part of the story that said he was sprinting at top speed with all four hooves, then maybe we would say. But if this guy was sprinting at top speed and he was running through the undergrowth and he was two while he was going to mark his path like the breadcrumbs. There's marathon runners who take two.

I could see him tripping. not a lowly stick. That's true. Marathon runners, super ultra-marathon runners. But marathon runners don't run where they could trip. They run on smooth flatness. Yeah. For that purpose. That's also true.

Ultra marathon runners run on smooth flatness. Tell that to the ground that they run on and take twos on while they run. They're not going to run in an abandoned area. That is just not, can not be scared firm. Marathon runners need people, first of all, scare-a-thon runners. Oh, my God. That was right in front of us. need an audience to cheer them on

or they're going to fucking kill themselves. So you notice how not a single Scarathon runner has ever been running when someone's not holding up a sign? But what if they're running? They only go when someone's saying, holding up signs, you can do it.

But what if they're running for ghosts? You can do too. You can't see a ghost. Running for ghosts? Running for ghosts. Instead of from, they're running for them. Running for them to get ghosts

to cheer them on. Anyway, I think that this has to, this specific event, whether or not marathon runners run on smooth or if they run on sticks. Because it was a race. This one was, is erased from the episode.

No. No, no, no, no. No, this one is paranormal for certain. This has to be a goo. Mm-hmm. Because, again, I can't stress enough. You don't run in two in the woods. Not if you're a normie.

Mm-hmm. Sure, if you're some kind of pro. Don't even bring normies into this. If you're some kind of pros running two in the woods every weekend. If that's your thing, man, do it. Mm-hmm. But if you're a normie out just to see a building in the woods, you're going to two and stay still.

And in that case, if you trip, it's because a ghost whipped a stick under your foot. Well, here's a postulate that we haven't thought of. What about his equilibrium being thrown off? And what can do that? A ghost. Your inner ear. What can get into your inner ear? A ghost.

Oh, exactly. Oh, my God. He got a wet wheelie from a ghost. So I'm starting to think that this one might be scare-firmed. This is scare-firmed. But, again, we have to figure out how to boost him. this is we're boost we're we're not just wondering we are a little bit wondering we need to destroy them

why the that's our job so okay so here we need a strategy to destroy the goo to boost him to boost him to boost okay how do we boost the goo so you would take a two yes it could even be a fake two or an animal's two okay it doesn't have to be you don't have to sit there so collect some animals too okay so first of all get animal to you're going to want to go to the pound step one get two pretend that you're going to hang out that you want a dog really badly and you say, before I get the dog, I'd like to see him make a two.

Let's get a two sample. Yes, so I need to run a two sample. I'm a scientist. And I want to know if he has worms. I'm a two olivist. Yes, exactly. So you get the two from the animal and then you leave him in the fucking cage. I don't want to ever see this thing again.

And then you head right to wherever this fat bastard fell over. Uh-huh. Oh, you need to wear a sumo suit to make it convincing. Because fat guys do disgusting stuff like crap on the ground. So you go, you put the crap on the ground, the two. And then, When you see the ghost's ghastly hand

heading towards you to put it in his finger in your ear to throw off your equilibrium and make you fall, you bowl Toro Toro, move to the other way. Now the ghost has fallen into the two. And ghosts to the goo. And that's boost.

Yep. And that's boosted. So we just boosted that. And that's been boosted. The ghost has been boosted. Yeah, that's a... That ghost is gone. That ghost is gone.

All right. Let's see this next one. Paranormal activity. Have you experienced any? This is from over-50s chat.com. And this is from Susan M. When I first joined, I did try to chat about my experiences, and there were some who liked to chat and question,

but some people made discussion difficult, and I decided to just keep things to myself. You see, what I've experienced seems to be so bizarre, some would call me mad or bad or worse. What's worse than mad and bad? I don't know. Worse. They could have called her worse. Oh, you're worse.

I did at one time post a genuine picture of a spirit girl, extremely clear and 100% genuine, but no one seemed interested. Of course, I understand people can't accept the paranormal or what seems strange happenings unless they experience for themselves, quite rightly too. I'm the same, but I do investigate for myself. I'm open to hearing experiences as it is so interesting. I never dismiss what someone experiences.

It's good to listen. Next slide. That's very sweet, Susan. Thank you, Oma. It seems to be very dark. The pick is lightened without changing anything at all. May, so you may see clearer. The original pick was taken thus.

Next slide. Oh, my God. Here's a better pick. All I've done is lighten it. I have not changed the photo at all. Next pick. Okay. So here's what I'm seeing.

I'm seeing an insanely scary, ghostly woman in the foreground of this photo. Yeah. With a normal scaredy cat terrified in the background. Yes, with somebody running away, noticing that there's a ghost in front of them and seeming to turn the other way. And there's a star. And there is the North Star. So this could have been taken anywhere in the world.

This is taken at night. She lightened the picture. So to boost this girl, spirit girl. The spirit girl in the back. I probably just rip her head off. That would definitely work. Well, that's it. That's all we need to say.

Well, but that would only work if she was a corporeal being. She's clearly very close. Yeah. Yeah, but closeness doesn't know realness. I could just reach out and touch her. It's not, it's just a screen. It's not a real. She's not in the.

Well, if I was taking the picture. I would just reach out and rip her head off. Well, you just did this. You're going to beckon the ghost over and then so you can kill her. They don't trust this. I don't be like this. Come here. Come here, girl.

I don't think that would work on a ghost. I think that girls are not human. All girl ghosts understand is sex. So you would have to seduce this ghost to get close to it. So Susan's not going to have a good chance because the ghost is clearly straight. So you would have to, what do girl ghosts like? Shopping spree. And don't say boy ghosts.

Oh, shopping spree. So, what do girls go buy, though? A bone bag? Yeah, a box of baguettes. A box of baguettes. Bowie Vitton. Booy Votan. They wear...

Boochie. Bootsy. They wear boochie. Scarenell. They like... They like prod damned. Pradam. Yeah.

They like... The devil wears Proud. They like Kate Spade. That's good. Kate Spade. She passed away. Spade digging a grave, a spade digging a grave. Yes. Kate Spade. Grave digger.

That kind of thing. Kate. Kate. Yeah. Cain. Cain Spade. Can't be scared. Can't be spayed. Because I'm not cor. I don't have a physical body. Yes. You can't spade me. Scare me. Scare me. What? Scare mez. Yes. Thank you. You know the most about fashion.

I know the most about ghostly fashion. And you're bragging a little bit about how many fashion things you know. Okay. Faded glory. Fated glory. Fated gory. Yes, that's good. They would wear per doom.

Per doom. They put on a little bit of perdom, a little hint of perdom. They would spay again. They would spay some per doom. So this is what I'm saying. You make a whole menagerie of beautiful items that they may want to buy. And then you stand behind it and you put your mouth in.

and through a glory hole with your lips out so they can come give you a big kiss but you have ghost poison on your lips which humans. Ghost poison solves a lot of these ghost. Ghost poison would be how I would get rid of most ghosts is just poison them with my ghastly poison. I think that's boosted. I think that's easily boosted. This has been boosted.

This has been boosted out of here. Boosted all over. All right. His next one, Bobby Brown says he had sex with a ghost. Really? In an excerpt from his new tell-all memoir, Every Little Step My Story, Bobby Brown writes about his tumultuous relationship with his late wife, Whitney Houston,

the loss of his daughter, Bobby Christina Brown, and also the time he had sex with a ghost. Is he saying he fucked ghostly Whitney? No, no, no. Next slide. The encounter occurred shortly after Brown bought an Atlanta mansion from the Scarface of porn, Mike Thievus, in the 90s. The title with the name

is really... The Scarface of porn. Mike Thievus. Mike Thievus. Mike Thiery. I sensed a lot of evil shit had gone down in that house. Swamp Thievus lived there, he writes. One memorable night, one of the ghosts descended from the ceiling and had sex with me. After you stop laughing, I need you to hear what I'm

saying, because I'm not making this up. And let me add this. This is before I touched any drug besides weed and alcohol. Next slide. Okay, so he's on the Wiz Khalifa cocktail. It's in there fucking a ghost. Yeah. I looked up and in the mirrors, I could actually see a white woman straddling me on the bed. The sensation felt

exactly like sex. I could feel my penis inside of her and it was not a dream. I was definitely awake while it was happening. All of a sudden, she was on leaving me alone and incredibly excited and terrified at the same time. Now, I found multiple reports of different celebrities having sex with ghosts.

You would think, starfug, yeah. Spectral, it's called the... Scarefuckers. It's, yeah, scarefokers, but it's called... It is. Wait, I kind of want to fuck a ghost. Well, Lucy Lou did. Bloody hell.

Lucy Lou is one of the people who had sex with the ghost. Lucy Lou, Kesha, and Pasaday La Herta. Who's that? She's in Enter the Void. Can you imagine how bad that would feel to be their boyfriend and you get that sloppy seconds after a ghost been in it?

After a ghost been up in there? It would be cold in there. It would be ghastly cold. I want to say that so many. What if you have a baby and it ends in a little squiggle? Like a ghost. You start asking questions. You have a holographic baby.

Yeah. I want to say that I wish we could boost this, but it is. I think scare-firmed. I don't think you can combat this. No, you cannot combat this at all. When so many celebrities are saying that they have had sex with a ghost, Keshire wrote a whole song about it. If celebrities can't handle this, what fucking chance to the goo blasters have?

No. We're not smart like celebrities. No. If we were smart like celebrities, we'd be celebrities. Exactly. We would be writing songs like Supernatural by Kessa. It's supernatural. That one?

That's about her having sex with a ghost. I think that's Katie Perry actually that I just said. Oh, you did. What is supernatural? Supernatural. Wait, infect me with your poison? That could be about ghosts too. Isn't that song called E.T?

It is called E.T. Extraterrestrial. She fucked up. She fucked up. She fucked a E.T. No, that's wrong. E.T.'s a baby. He is.

You can't be fucking E.T. You do. E.T. wants you to think he's a baby. And you know what? Katie Perry, scarefirmed, boboophile. We're talking about Keshah, though. Scarefirm, boofile. Certified lover boy, scarefirm to boofile.

Me and Alex want to do a remix that song where instead of that disgusting word that he says, he says, certified lover boy CEO awesome guy because I like Drake. Drake, Drake combating that? Yeah. Popping back. CEO, awesome guy. All right, what's this last one here? I think this is the final one.

Oh, no, no, no. This has to do with the other one. This has to do. But can you be contacted by celebrity spirits? And big consideration, 493 said, Great name. I heard the voice of a celebrity the day that they died in my sleep. At the same hour they died.

I didn't like this celeb that much and don't know why I heard the voice. This happened a little bit, but with a different celebrity. A little bit after. So they don't say what celebrity? They don't say what celebrity. It seems like they are lying and they couldn't even think of one celebrity. Just make up a name. So this is boosted.

This is immediately boosted. What celebrity ghosts would you do or want to be done with? Ooh. I'll eat someone from the 1400s. Marilyn Monroe. Yeah, Marilyn Monroe. Typhoid Mary. Yeah.

Ooh. You know that shit stinks. Ew. All right. And this is the final one. This one, just because we were so scared, I wanted a light in the mood. Thank you. What is your idea for a horror story or movie?

And this person said, what in the doom or Ryan Darkwood who has watched more movies than they can remember says being trapped in a room with my ex-wife till the end of time and she is a mortal and so am I all the time Britney Spears is playing a full blast and the women from the TV show the viewer yelling at me for being too manly I needed this one in here to lighten the mood because we are terrified we are sitting at the edge of our seats right now scare firm I'm gonna say yeah that's a scare firm that's a scare firm movie in fact I'd like to fund this movie.

Yeah. You're going to Hollywood. Orion Darkwood. With that name? Orion. We need you in the big screen. We need you on the silver screen. Yeah.

All right. You're done? Yeah, I'm done. That's it. Who next? I can go. Let me pull up my phone items. Actually, I don't need it.

This person, this is, I think, on WorldShift.com or something like that. It was like basically it's a place for just anything weird. Okay. This is in the paranormal section. This is from the Victorian mind. And a ghost just come out of me.

Please share your spookiest true stories with me. Hello, all. I'm an aspiring YouTube horror narrator. And if you would be willing to share any of your true spooky experiences with me, so I may share them on my YouTube page, I would be oh so delighted, whether it is about ghosts, shadow people, mothman, Bigfoot, aliens, or just eerie experiences with human beings. I would be very happy to hear about it.

Next slide. Me and my girlfriend, this is from Cute Boy 12. me and my girlfriend What? You know cute boy? No. Me and my girlfriend we are staying

I can't see because of a GoPro pop-up Now that was a jump scare That's a jump scare right there We are staying at a playground next to the cemetery and reading Pennsylvania

Reading Pennsylvania And a guy walked up and asked what time it was I told him it was 12 noon He walked up towards the Cemetery disappeared, and this is a true story. Wow.

So I guess I was going to ask why they are staying at a playground, but I guess cute boy 12. I mean, it says they're 16 to 17. So how would you boost this ghost? Staying at a playground. You should buy a hotel room. Yeah, get out of the, stop staying at the playground. I was thinking maybe you could send him the wrong time and wrong directions. Tell the ghost that it is, it's like 70 years in the future.

so the ghost has to go away. Or you tell them that it's... Your time is done. It's 9 a.m. Tell the ghost that it's the year before they died. So they have to come back to life. Yes. That's a really good idea.

That is a really good idea. So that one I think we boosted. That's a boost immediate. Boost. That's a premature boost. Yeah. Premature boost for sure. We boosted really fast.

Very fast boost on that one. We work together to boost quickly. All of you guys. Alpherts together boosted. That's our alpharts. Okay. Next. Somebody else responded to this.

I have sex stories I can share. That was spec man. Spec man. Speckman. But they didn't actually share them. Spectral man? Whoa. They didn't actually share them because apparently they said in a later comment that the stories that they would share would violate the terms of service of the website.

Oh, that's interesting. That's scare firm. That's one scare firm for sure. All right. Next slide. What the heck? Two cents on my credit card. This one's terrifying.

Yesterday, I went to pay the overdue amount on my credit card, which, should have totaled about $270. Cashier tells me, oh, don't worry, there's only one or two cents due. Baffled but happy me, I put my hand in my jacket pocket, and I find sweets. I do not eat sweets. I do not even like sweets. And nobody around me eats sweets nor buys sweets. Nobody around you?

This is a sugar demon. Nobody? I'm scared. Nobody. So these are sweets that come out of nowhere. I'm so scared right now of this one. But I think I've actually found. Salt is going to be basically post.

Pokemon style double quadruple effective because demons can't cross a circle of salt and sugar is the enemy of salt. You say, do I want a sugar snack or a salt snack? Yes, and the sugar demons do not want a salt snack. Yes, especially not a bowl of salt on the ground. Yes. Does you guys remember that thing, the midnight game?

No. You all remember this? No. This was scary. Something about it. This was when you draw a circle of salt in your house at night, midnight in fact, and you say you want to let the devil into your house and then all sorts of weird stuff

those types of games always freaked me the fuck out me too I would not on no sleep I wouldn't do bloody merry right now I wouldn't do it I would not do it right now it's too scary yeah well but even if we weren't recording I wouldn't do it is a camera a mirror I really hope it's not because literally movies about that you guys said BM twice

I'm not going to say BM a third time we're not going to talk about BM anymore no we're not going to talk about BM we're just going to boost exactly okay and the next slide this is we may have found the person and they say, I do. They're talking about the sweets. They're saying, I like the sweets and people around me like sweets. Okay.

Next slide. Tell me about your paranormal experience. I believe in paranormal. Next. I did an irresponsible driving maneuver one evening driving home. And on the right side of the road, where I was passing in the emergency lane, a coyote was on the side of the road looking back at me as I zoomed by. I don't know about that stuff, but it did make me wonder about the nature of

things. And if there is more to nature and of being seen slash witnessed. Easy boost. Shotgun. Shotgun out of the window. Yep. Simple. Blow away that animal. Next. I had an experience with what I think was a gnome. This is a bombshell. Okay. This is a massive bombshell. Okay. And there's proof of this one. Next slide. So this is scare firmed right off the jump? Well, I'll let you guys decide because it is a council of sorts. Okay. I live somewhere in Scandinavia. Last summer, me and my friend went past a garden area that has a bar and old chestnut trees. I was walking with an action camera.

As we were walking there, we did not hear anything unusual, but when I got home and brows the footage, I could clearly hear a scream that I think must have been a gnome. The kind of scream, my camera caught, you'll hear it. Trust me, you're going to hear the scream. He uploads the phone. No way.

Yeah. This kind of scream my camera caught was the type when someone gets startled because it saw us coming and it got scared. I think it is possible that many types of fairy creatures lives in that garden. Since I have caught different sounds and voices there, I even have a recording where something says mommy at this same garden. I have also captured a voice somewhere else in the city at a park area,

and I can hear a voice yelling my name clearly as day. None of these voices were heard at the time, but only on the recording. I guess these voices could be called EVPs. I think something were mimicking a human voice and yelled my name. Maybe a gnome did it. If they do these things, I'm starting to wonder if a gnome or other creature follows us around the city or is watching us where they might have for at least a while.

Okay, you can skip the next slide. So let's go to the video because this is, this is like really honestly scary, okay? So you're going to want to turn this up as basically as loud as it'll go. You're going to want to turn it up on there too and skip to about 45 seconds so that we can hear kind of the buildup.

Okay, this is what the camera picked up. Why is it censored? There it is. Can you go back? Can you go back about five seconds? Play it again. Play it again. Go to 53. Listen to this and tell me this isn't a gnome.

That is a gnome. That is clear as day. Okay. So, first of all, how would you boost the gnome? Step on it. Yeah. Step on it. Maybe leave a cookie trap.

Cookie trap is really good. But here's the thing. The gnome is already scared. The gnome might be more scared of you than you are And I know that gnomes are scary but the gnome might be

more scared of you because listen to that So I'm going to have to run fast One more time Just one more time Well I mean And he's right That could be a child

It sounds like a kid I mean I guess it's already boosted If you just walk towards it Yeah it will boost away from you Yeah That's true Speed boost

You don't Yeah it's a speed boost Exactly this is boosted. This is immediately this is footage of a boost. That's right. That's right.

Somebody did our job for us. We can take the day off. That's the noise I make when I boost too. How scary is it that in Scandinavia, they don't even have fucking ghosts. They got fucking gnomes walking around. They've got to be worried about. I found a bunch of shit from people.

What an amazing scream. Yeah. You found the Homer gnome. I found a Homer. A gnomer. I live in Scandinavia. I don't want to be a no. I don't want to be a Noam in Scandinavia. I want to live in Springfield. You've got to be a no. I don't want to be Nomer.

The Smallsons. So that is the extent of my boosting. The Impsons. The Impsons. The Impsons is really good. Nomer Imson. Nomor Imson. Nomer Imson. And he works at the cookie factory. Nome or Emson is really funny And large She's a big troll Oh how are you gonna make a gnome get with a troll

I'm bigger than you homie It's the same version as in Simpsonson's itself There's literally it's about a guy with no hair Getting with a girl with biggest hair in all of the universe That's true That's actually oddly true Yeah it's more than oddly true

It's factually accurately That's oddly factual Oddly factual What do you have Okay Here pull mine up I'll go fast and I have a bunch of long ones we can skip.

So this first one here. Have you ever spotted a ghost while doing your weekly big shop? Thought not, but one shopper at the Skegnus branch of Tesco claimed to have captured footage of ghostly food and a supermarket trolley, which he believed was assigned from his late grand telling him to buy some bread. The man spotted an abandoned empty trolley in the store's car park and approached it, claiming it had an eerie feel to it.

As he got closer, he noticed the reflection of the trolley in the store's window showed that it was full of food, including bread. He whipped out his phone to film the phenomenon, and in the video, I couldn't find the video. You can clearly see that the food is only visible in the reflection on the trolley is completely empty. So this is ghost food. The ghost of food that has been bought.

That's... When you buy food from the grocery store, the ghost stays to haunt the grocery store. I never even thought of that. How would you boost this? You could eat the food? I mean, this would make me rethink everything because every single day,

there is a full-blown massacre at the grocery store. Sausage party. This is full sausage party. This is the truth of sausage party. We'll do lightning. We'll give quick boosts how to boost these situations. Okay. Here's the next one here.

Or the pets said, eat it. Eat it. Yeah, that's going to help. Next one. Seeing and talking with Jesus Christ, when I was an nine-year-old boy and loving the Lord, I saw Jesus in all white dressed as a shepherd on the wing of an airplane while it was still boarding. So we can just stop there.

How would you boost Jesus Christ? I would fly away. Yeah. Wait for the plane to take off. and have him be sucked into the, into the turbines. You watch Jesus get sucked into the turbine. Oh, no. It's happening again.

Yeah. Okay, here's this next one. Green mist and orbs. Hello there. I would like to know what this entity is. In my bedroom and only at night occasionally appears a thick green mist which moves around with purpose. It sometimes goes right through me. I find it frightening in my bedroom always makes me feel uncomfortable these days.

It just feels wrong. I also sometimes get a strong feeling that I'm being. watched. It's usually then that I see a bright blue orb. This surprises me, but doesn't thus scare me. This is a new house, but I'm wondering what this could be any advice. And what I'd like to ask this person, which I wish I could ask them, is do you have a roommate who eats a lot of beans? Taco Bell. Taco Bell. Green stinky fart. Green mist. And here's how these could be clouds. Yeah. And you just have to, you have to just learn to tank this, I think. Yeah. I think you have to just hot box it. It's just green mist. It's just literally

close the door. If it was a demon coming in and throwing. you around. I'd understand wanting to boost it, but it's just green mist. Just live with it. Close your eyes. In a volcano vape and rip it in one fucking pole. Or get that, get that ozone spray. They sell at the gas station that's supposed to get weed smell at your car. Get that fake penis that does fake pee that they sell at

smoke shops and start sucking on it. Yeah. So I don't even think this needs boosting. No. No. I think we're good on that. Yeah. Here's the next one. Hello All. I'm fairly unfamiliar with this terrain, but I experienced something rather weird today. Forgive me the explanation is odd, but I can't quite understand how this happened. And I wonder if it's a

thing, or am I going a bit mental? I got into the car and the radio came on. I self-criticized myself in my head for listening to a teeny bopper pop music radio station the last few days when I really should be listening to a news channel. I also thought I should try this other station. Let's call it station X. My mom record. Don't. Don't listen. Don't listen to that was a ghost. That was a full ghost. As my mom recommended it to me before, it's somewhere in between news and pop music. But then I thought maybe another time. And knowing me, I won't ever listen to it because I like to stick with to what I know. What's in between news and pop?

Station X. That's scary. Five seconds later, the song on the radio, which I really like, stopped only a few seconds in and another song started playing. And I cursed the radio station for making that mistake. But then I realized my radio had just changed itself to station X by itself. Now, here's what I have to say about this. There's an easy way to not experience paranormal phenomena like this with your radio.

Step one, don't curse your radio. Yeah, that's easy. That's on you. that you cursed it, of course it's going to miss it. It has a, yeah, that's a curse on it. Second of all, stay away from Station X. You should not be listening to Station. Do not listen to that.

If you're afraid of paranormal phenomena, you should not be tuning into Station X. First step, turn off Station X. Stop listening to that. Leave that station alone. Yeah, it are, I mean, it's already an impossible station mixing pop and news. Yeah. What the hell is that? Probably the Flowbots.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Flowbots radio. Flowbots radio. Just kind of, it's, it's making your brain. Think like the news about current events. But then it's also songs.

Minutes to Midlight Lincoln Park specifically. Yes, yes, easily. Here, we can skip this next one. Then the one after this is I made a Ouija board following the instructions of Wikihau, but it moves really, really slow. But in response to my questions,

what does that mean? Or does it just move slow? I think you just got a slow ghost. Yes, this is, you can't be, also maybe don't blame a ghost for your slow hands. funny to say someone who clearly

does it thinks a Ouija board is real it works but it moves slow how do I get this thing to work a little faster

yeah it's gonna buy it don't make one yeah that's right exactly of course it's gonna be slow you made it yourself

leave it to the good minute has bro to get real Ouija board the Parker brothers they know how to make them uh here's the next one

so me and my cousin made a mistake we invited a spirit into my house and now the super old doll I have is missing there have been at least two deaths

the property. Get rid of that. Well, the doll's gone. Well, first of all, get it, if it's a girl doll, get it a kin. Damn right.

You and your cousin made a mistake. Yeah. That's right. You have a super old doll. Yeah. Or an old super doll. What did he say? A super old doll.

Oh, okay. But it's missing. Okay. Here's the next one. Pain between brows, sudden images. Last night, I listened to my favorite band,

and I felt these emotions come over me, very intense and overwhelming. At first, the music was so wonderful and pleasing to me that I almost felt high. But then I'm not sure why, but I got this pain between my brows, and then I started seeing these frightening images

in my head. There's one man with an insect like mouth very angry and open wide. Then another man with razor sharp teeth and his mouth also open unnaturally wide. Another man in a doorway with a top hat and rabbit-like ears blood dripping down his chin. And then one odd little man with huge eyes and a very small forehead. At first I was overwhelmed

and a bit scared by all of these images popping into my head so suddenly and unexpectedly but then I reminded myself that all you need is love. I smiled and I went on to enjoy my music and then I meditated a bit before falling asleep. Everything was fine then. It was really weird though. I almost feel as if there are a lot of hidden messages in this band

I love and that they are trying to trigger certain thoughts or create certain vibes in people. Is all media evil? What do you think about all of this? Is it related to the third eye? First of all, yes one is related to the third eye. Definitely. Two, yes all media is evil. Yes.

three, the power that's, this is not paranormal. Tell me you're a Pink Floyd fan without telling me. The power of music to make you imagine. Yeah. Yeah. So you just, you didn't have a paranormal event.

You had an imagination spree. Completely. Completely true. You had an imagination spree. And it was an imagination spree. All right, here's the next one. Asshole ghost.

Assonese. Okay, this is pissing me off. I move into a new apartment. I soon noticed the toilet has comedic timing. Whenever I'm watching a movie or something, it makes noise, but only during the quiet scene. Every quiet scene

The noise happens So I cannot hear But it never happens Any other time Ever And stuff moves I need my credit card The card that has been

On the counter And not moved in three months He leaves his credit card On the counter for three months Where it goes man Suddenly gone Spend four hours searching for it Call bank to get another

Bank says I need ID So I look at my ID And go to get a drink Come back less than a minute later ID is gone I live alone Look for an hour Give up

Start heading to work It's a scenario Where you spend five hours Looking for his credit card and went to get a drink. And then he goes to work. We start heading to work. Find both credit card and ID on top of front door.

And this entire time, the temperature in this place has gotten so hot that it's unbearable despite the lack of a heater and AC cranked up to full. This is pissing me off. How do I kill this asshole? Okay, this is, okay, you're leaving,

you can't find your credit card anywhere. The ghosts also, the house is getting hot, ghosts love cold. Yeah. This is a gas leak. you're leaving shit or you don't know it you're drinking too much.

I would say you've let a demon into your life called alcohol and you are doing things like blacking out thinking that you need to slide your credit card and the gap on the top of the door. Where you're going to end up is a whole lot fucking hotter than that apartment. Quit the boozing downstairs. You are losing.

It's a moose lodge where they do some meetings. Yeah. Bugaboo Creek. Yeah. And that shit is very great hot. You're sweating it out. I was going to a bucket of creek. You don't want to end up in an ayahuasca sweat lodge, man.

No, no. It's showing up there, Tom Sager and Berkre there, too. Oh, God, that'd be hell. They make you throw up. I don't want to do that. All right, here's a little bit of a long one. And this is more about an interesting invention that I wanted to throw in here. Why is that piquing my interest? So my dad called me up like three days ago to help him move stuff from the garage into a moving vehicle.

They were sending out to my brother, lazy dickhead. It was getting up. Sorry, I'll censor it. So much cussing in the last. Yeah, not nice. I'll censor this one. Okay. Let me find the sensor beep on here for you guys.

Okay. Okay. Into a moving vehicle, they were sending out to my brother, lazy head, who was getting an apartment up in Maine. My dad needs my help with stuff like that because he's far too friggin. Can I say friggin? No. Censor that. Say it again.

He's far too old to manhandle it by himself and my mom isn't an option. Anyway, I came over and we started popping boxes out at the garage. Then my dad starts freaking out. Is that okay? No. Freaking out. What do you think? My dad starts out when he finds my old TV.

We used to have it in me and my brother's room. So he fumbles around with this little thing and starts to talk about some... Little thing? That's an innuendo. So he fumbles around with this and starts to talk about some weird stuff and he asks me if I remember watching old scary movies on it. I had and have no idea what he was talking about, but he keeps going saying that every Friday in October when we were younger, he'd rent a horror movie and he'd sit down in our room and watch it with us. I told him we never had a VCR, so there was no way we could have just put a movie in. but then he said what really got me.

He said that he put it in our old game system. I asked him if he meant the Nintendo we'd had and he nodded, but really half-budded. Like, he didn't really know what a Nintendo was. So a couple hours go by and we were sitting at the dinner table, having a couple of beers, sorry, a couple of... And he practically jumps out of his chair saying that the console he was talking about

was called a DDG-something TV system. He said some really creepy... Like, yeah, yeah, it'd make the movies scarier. It would mess with the screen and the sound from the speakers. Anyway, freaky or freaky crap freaky crap There we go

He doodled it on a sketched Don't say doodle Don't say doodle On his sketchpad And tossed it over to me And kept asking if I remembered the thing And I didn't I still don't

And I think it's fantastically spooky It looks more like a Nintendo game than a console But it didn't exist anyway So you can see where I'm at You guys want to take a look At the very least Happy Early

Have a great month Halloween Now next this is the this is the picture of this thing. This is a machine that this dad has invented that makes movies and TV scarier by messing with the screen and the speakers. That's a Nintendo car.

That is an NES game. This is boosted. Well, but it's scary because it's so old. But it's a machine that messes with the TV. This is confirmed. One time, me and Noah, our families went on vacation together and we had a, we played Battlefront,

Star Wars Battlefront. And the game glitched out and started playing a voice line that one of the white soldiers says over and over again and it started saying watch your back over and over and over and we could not turn off the console we had to unplug it. That's scary.

So I have had a similar experience. That's extremely scary. It really freaked this out. And then we watched a beautiful mind. Wow. Yeah. It was all real scary. That's magical. All right. I have one left here. Violent deaths near home. Good morning, P.F. Unfortunately

a 28-year-old woman killed herself by Crushing yourself into a light pole about 100 yards from my house last night. How would you protect your house from negative energy like this? Well, if it's in the light pole... Yeah, it's not going to go near your house. No, I would say that you're pretty much done.

The entire neighborhood. It's being disseminated through the light waves. You've got to take a slingshot to that light. But how would you boost the situation? How would you stop this from happening in the first place? Light pole, taking out... Take out every... Take out the light pole.

Okay. If you want to keep women safe in your neighborhood from stuff like this, take out all street lights over every single part of. of the sidewalk and make sure that it's pitch black because then they're not going to know what to crush themselves. Put pillows around every telephone pole. Yes. And then you're fine.

Just make sure that it's completely dark in your neighborhood. Yeah. Because light poles are dangerous. Well, that's boosted. That's easily boosted. And that's the easiest boost of all time. Is that your last boost? Yeah. Well, guys, I hope that we have...

Blasted some goo for you. Blasted goo all over every single thing that you believe. Yep. And that you now... It's stuck. The goo is stuck. There we go. Wait.

Oh, my God, you've become goo. Kind of cool. It's honestly such a pleasure to just get on YouTube with you guys and just blast these goo. Oh, yeah. Let's just blast it on out here. They should call it goo tube when we're on it. Honestly, they do.

Yeah. I've heard a lot of people say that. Can you pull up goutube.com? I want to see Guteub. Probably not that good of an idea. But let's just check. Oh, gootube.com slash lander. That's a black screen.

So we found another secret website. These are websites that you go to when you think of the name of it and it turns out they predicted this is a gangstocking thing they predicted that there was supposed to be a website there they didn't have time

to put it together how's that two in one episode that's insane tried boo-tube I don't know about this one either not in that boo-tube bootube.com huge domain

wow how much is that it's only $16,000 you guys five people have it in their cart let's buy it all right it's only $659 a month for 24 months and that's very popular

of an option Yeah. We can put this on Klarna. Let's do it. All right. All right. Bye, gang. Goodbye.

Is that the Russian beach here? Yeah. It's where all the Russian guys. It's like the Russian mob was there. Don't say that. Chill. Chill. You're going to get us in fucking, like chill out for real.

Say that on your solo pot, bro. Yes, dude. Do not implicate us. You can't come in here and say, yo, the bloods live at one, two, three, fucking red. Stop, Caleb. One, three. Red Street. Stop! Oh my God.

You fucking... It could have been... You literally specified that it was a street. And the Crips live on Blue Avenue. Stop. I swear to God. Latin Kings live in Latin America. I'm not afraid of America. Come get me. Yeah, what are you going to do? You're this big.

What? He made the message to MS-13. Oh, yeah. I just remembered that. Did they ever write you back? Yeah, well, they said they message me on Instagram. Drop here on my message request.

From MS-13 official? I said, no sweat. No sweat, man. We'll leave you be. Damn. We don't want it with you. They should be. You look hard as fuck.

We don't want to, with all your tattoos. And I replied to them. I said, bitch, shut the fuck up. Come try and kill me. Wait, why would you not just leave? Because I'm going to fucking spray their asses. Come get my head. Why do we get...

I dare you. I double dog dare you. And you can't turn down a double dog dare. I sent them a voice message. You're not going to do funky town on me. Pussy, pussy, pussy, pussy. You sent that to MS-13? Yeah.

Microsoft. Their official verified Instagram account. What the fuck? Well, they post MS-13 memes? They throw, they post MS-13 memes and a lot of recipes. It's actually... That MS-13 feeling on a Saturday. When you cut off their head.

Ah! Yeah. it's that and then it's like one pan one pan recipes and then like pictures of jim and pam it's like why was their love forever yeah yeah