Podcast About List - Ep. 303 - The Critics Hour

Episode Date: August 21, 2024

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Yeah, there we go. I saw the most, I think I'm number one most disgusting deli order I've ever seen in my life on the way over here. Mustards with milk. You're really, you're so close. You're so close. Guy walks in, the guy says, what do you need? He says, I'll have, let me get scrambled eggs.

And it's like he's coming up with it. Like, he didn't have it ready. He thought it was Aki. Yeah. So he had, he didn't have it ready. He was going, let me get scrambled eggs with Chipotle chicken and mustard. and lettuce on a roll. Oh, wow.

You should be allowed as a deli owner, you should be allowed to say no to people. Yeah, that's crazy. Mustard and lettuce and eggs. Yeah. But I do want to try that a little bit. Maybe it's good. My feeling is that if somebody,

the one time I did that, I copied someone's order. I discovered that I like mayonnaise and ketchup with a bacon, egg, and cheese. I had never even heard of that. Well, that's not weird. Well, that's not weird. Yeah, that's not weird.

I had never heard of that. And it was like when I first moved here. But it's still something you could expect to put on a same way. It was a little weird. Put a ketchup on eggs. He copied that video, that guy that's like, Yo, Ock, let me get a big thing.

I've never forget. That guy was there. Never, never, never. That guy was there. He copied that guy's ford. Tell me you're from New York without telling me you from New York. I'll go first. I.

Yo, Ack, let me get a bacon, egg, and cheese, salt pepper, ketchup, man, a roll. Yes, sir. You already know the vibes. I can't forget the bed. You've got to cop the air. You already know that. Yes, sir.

No, there's this guy at Sam's deli, man, and he said that. Dude, I tried getting lettuce on my sandwich. No. That's you. Yeah. Can I try lettuce? I'm not trying lettuce. You can say no.

Manez and ketchup is an odd combination with an egg. The mayonnaise, I never get the mayonnaise because it's egg. I mean, no, I'm saying I don't, that's true. I'll side with you on that. That one is you don't need to get that on a bacon. But their egg and mayonnaise are brother and sister. Yeah, I also, but it's not the type of thing where I'm like, oh, I wouldn't get it because it's weird or gross. I would not get it because it was weird or gross, but I tried it one time and now I get it every time.

Yeah, it seems good. A little bit of it. I think it's a little indulgent to me. When I get a bacon, egg, and cheese, I just get bacon and cheese. I feel like I don't need anything else in there. I'm already cheating. I do bacon egg and cheese, sub ketchup for hot sauce. Where is I going to have thought you meant you got it on a sub.

A bacon egg sauce. That's crazy. You get a hero. I don't even why did that happen. I've seen somebody get a... They've asked. They've asked me the question. That's wrong.

And I've seen it happen. That's pure hunger. Yeah, that's fucked up. Get a fucking lunch sandwich. On a heat... You want it on a hero? And I'm like, what the fuck? You shouldn't be that hungry at breakfast.

Yeah. But if you're feeding to a few people. Fortune meme. Remember that. And you should and Hero if you're going to order something like that. Damn. I don't really appreciate the references to Fortune. Damn.

And me and Pet are about Fortune like that. With the killing yourself. You are not about Fortune like that. Us too are about. 4chan like that. I'm going to make a post on 4chan that says, did you guys know that Cameron and Patrick are secret lurkers? And it'll be a bunch of pictures of your cat and your fiance posted. It's like, I'll go, yep, I know. It's them. Look, the timing matches up. And then I'll post a text that you guys send me to say. Yeah, that was like the big conspiracy. Lord and Taylor Swift.

Yeah, Lord and Taylor Swift. But it's so clear that they were not. I don't know. I believe it. okay I believe it too it's not so crazy that a celebrity would use a website yeah that's not so crazy to me well it's 4chan specifically dude that's more than a website

yeah that shit runs deep that's practically the necronomacomicon I wish I wasn't I wish I could talk about this without being afraid for my life but I can't because I know the other day and it made me honestly it was like oh like I haven't seen one of those in a while

was um on on X the everything website There was a post that was like, listen, we are anonymous. And it was like a verified anonymous account. And it was like doing like the whole like we can strike when you least expected. Bring them back. And it was like, oh, man. They only care about animals now.

That's yeah. That's so fucking stupid. Yeah, they only, it's like you only hear about them now when someone's like, oh, here's an abused dog. Yeah, they stand around with the, with the computer monitors. Do not mess with kittens or cats. Yeah. Don't fuck with people's cats. I remember there was some documentary called like don't F with cats and I watched it about 20 minutes and then I realized it was just interviewing like fat people to and they were like yeah I saw somebody kill a cat and I thought it was wrong. Yeah, I don't care about this.

I found their username. Yeah. So I found out their house. So I found out their user name. Their Hogwarts house. And from there I was able to find out their account. And I don't. I was able to access their homepage. I was able to see all their pictures. So yeah, I know what their face looks like. now. And from that I was able to print out a picture. That seems a bit extreme to me to get someone's account. All you do is kill a bunch of kittens and somebody has the disgusting balls to find your house.

Oh, man, that's scary. Back off. Back off. Find the cat's house if you want to help the cat. Yeah, go get the cat. You don't have to get this guy. Leave the guy out of it. What was that documentary about? It was like a guy that threw a bunch of cats in a river. And they found his ass and they beat him up

I don't think they beat them up. I think he got like a $4,000 ticket or something. Yeah, you just get a fine. Yeah, because it's just, I mean, I don't think you can go to prison for like animal abuse. Yeah, I think you can. Can you? I think it depends. But animals are not people as far as I know.

Well, there's laws against, yeah. There's laws, but there's laws against traffic tickets. Yeah. They're doing a traffic violation. In Russia, you can just like, throw a, like, a jaguar off a roof. Okay. Because they have them as pets over there. Victor backwards.

Yakov, smeared off. Yeah. Victor backwards is cool. He says everything fucking backwards. No, he says it's Soviet Russia. It's back. He should have had one joke. And Soviet Russia backwards is forwards.

Exactly. Then you would have said, okay, I know what every single thing is going to be from now on. Yeah. And you know, in normal America, Soviet Russia jokes are forward. Forward. No, normal aren't jokes. Well, in Soviet, no. It would be in Soviet Russia, Soviet Russia.

Soviet Russia jokes are just normal. But my point is that from in America, it's backwards to what in Soviet Russia it would be. Yeah. I'm not here to do directionology with you. It's too early in the day. He, um, Yakov Smyrnav, uh, he opened this like restaurant slash theater in Branson, Missouri. And it was like, you would get like dinner in a show, but then the show was like him coming out and doing like all the Soviet Russia jokes. That's a show. That's a great show. That's, well, are you kidding? Well, I mean, I guess in the 90s. Like, yeah, but like... What was the name of this place?

I think it was called Yakovs. Yeah, so I can't say that people will be upset. Wait, what the fuck? Yakov-Smernav. Well, no, it's just like the same joke. Let's go to the grand theater tonight. Let's go to the theater. Yeah.

I wonder what the show is saying. Maybe they do Russian food. I don't know. Probably not. Probably backwards Russian food. I saw it on this. I had this cassette, like this VHS tape that was like an ad for Branson, Missouri. And I just remember, like...

Where did you get that for? I had the goodwill. And you just picked that up. I picked that. I was a VHS collector in high school when I would get like any tape that I would find and like anything that looked like really stupid like that. And it was like...

I wish that we'd never grew up and being a collector was still finding stuff on the street and that doesn't matter and nobody cares about. Exactly. Now it's about who has the most money. Now you have to buy stuff from eBay. Yeah. You've actually have to know...

We've talked about it many times but the fact that people actually know how much something costs is one of the worst development. I'm not even saying that I wish I could find stuff that was expensive. I'm saying I wish that I was still satisfied by picking up something random that doesn't matter. Oh, even that. You don't even know what's good or bad

back in the day. I'm picking up. I don't even, it's not even, yeah, I found a book. There was a book on the side of the sidewalk, so I picked it up. It was an import of my collection. More than a, more than a hobby even. Yeah. Horting. Yeah. Oh, it's definitely a hoarding thing with the VA. I had like 120 or

something like that I had like a lot that were all funny crap yeah well I mean most of it I had a TV with the VCR built in so I just oh nice and you'd watch them yeah it had like 120 and like most of them were like actual movies that I like it was only they were like a dollar each at Goodwill well that would come I would spend like 20 bucks and I'll just get like a shit 101 Dalmatians in the the plastic case was so fire back when you didn't have to have your own apartment yeah it's true back when you could your parents and does bring home trash and leave it in your room? Dude, it was sick.

It was amazing. My brother brought home a shopping cart. Did you bring back a broken boom box? Yeah, for no reason. Or actually just a stereo, but you called it a boom box. And you put that and you're like, yeah, I'm going to fix that. I would always bring you back and be like, I'm going to fix it. Yeah. I didn't know anything. I did the same thing. I found a record

player in the woods once. You said, I'm a fix yeah. I said I was going to feel. Well, it worked fine. I think the needle was a little fucked up, but I remember I was like, oh, now I have two record players. That's big. too. Mashups. Home-made mashups.

Dude, I'm going to be doing such amazing mash-ups. My brother stole a shopping cart from like Shaw's or something and then brought that home and then that was his dresser in high school. He just had all of his clothes in a shopping cart. All right.

See, that is probably where my parents would have drawn a line and I just discovered a difference between our parents. Yeah. Is that you really did live kind of a Huck Finn lifestyle as a kid? I guess so.

My younger brother didn't wear shoes all summer. yeah and uh you've told me that before yeah well he had to go to the hospital like one summer one summer he didn't wear shoes all summer and they would like leave his shoes outside he had these like dc's and uh and that let the video where like broke his arm he went to the hospital and uh they took his shoes off for some reason i don't know why i just caught you in a lie you said that he didn't wear shoes all summer he didn't wear the shoes he left him and he had to put the shoes on they had to put the shoes on because he was going they had to the hospital you said he had to put you They had to put the shoes on.

You said all summer, which means... Yeah, you just got caught in a full life. All 90 days. I bet that he took his shoes off to go play in the yard. Yes. I'm sure he did that. I bet he did that, but you lied to me and I'll never forgive you. Well, let me see.

Was he barefoot walking around the restaurants? You can't be barefoot. Yeah, you can't be barefoot in public. Oh, in which? What kind of story? He didn't wear shoes all summer. He didn't wear shoes when he went out to play as well. Who did?

All summer. Everyone to wear, out to play with their shoes. I will say I wore shoes when I played. I did too. I thought it was weird. Or you go in the yard. I thought it was weird that he didn't wear shoes. I would wear some shoes because there was worms. But then when he did put his shoes on, the nurses threw his shoes away because they were so smelly. Oh, because he was wearing him so much. Because he was wearing them. No, you'd leave him outside. He'd take off his shoes when he would go play. So then he had to, then he really had no shoes for the summer because they threw, they

I don't remember the exact thing. I just remember my mom telling me that the nurses. at the hospital threw away his shoes. That's it. How would you let that happen as a parent? How could you let you do the thing that you bought? There's so many things that my mom has told me, and I think that she's a crazy liar. I don't even want to get into the triple-decker bunk bed

because I thought about that the other day, it's a true. And even though we called your mom and asked her about it, it's a lie. There's no such thing as a triple-decker bunk bed. There is a triple-decker bunk bed. There isn't one. There is. Okay, maybe if you live in,

look up a triple bunk bed and then you have the highest ceiling you would be every morning my head on the ceiling yeah it was my mom wasn't very smart about it and every day'd go all my arms are there my arms are so look right there Photoshop that's not Photoshop it is my my my niece and nephews

have a triple bunk bed right now yes my bedroom from childhood okay my niece and nephews also have a triple bunk bed you lived in a hundred percent birthday room I'm going to, I was, I should have taken a picture last weekend when I was home. And you didn't. I could have taken a picture of the triple bunk bed that they have. It's not in front of home.

No, here's what I bet it is. Bunk beds underneath storage. No. Yep. No. There's three fucking beds. That is, I've been over this before. That's nothing.

Exactly. That's where they keep the, the change of sheets. It's a palette. It's not for someone to sleep. Also, that is not, that doesn't count as a layer of the bed because that's on the floor. It counts It doesn't count It counts

It doesn't The bed starts on that I had a triple bunk bed When I was a kid It's bullshit And my little brother has PICA or something Has PICA?

I'm pretty sure he has or had PICA I don't know if he's still eating random crap Don't tell me he ate one of the bunks He would bite That's why it only looks like He would bite on the side Oh I used to do that I had a wooden bed

Yeah He would bite up Yeah that bed That's what he would do What is wrong with me I don't know Well, you and my brother maybe have pike up. I bought everything.

I bit my shirts up. Yeah. I bite everything I could get on. I loved biting. He would bite into cans. I chewed and bite it. My brother didn't swallow, though. I think that's what pike is like a goat.

PICA is when you eat the... When you swallow stuff? Yeah. So what's when, what's a biting addiction? Just normal. I think that's normal. Chewery. Nying?

Chewery, yeah. You think teething happens till you're an adult. For me, yeah, I still chew. Yeah, you still chew. I like chew. I like gum. I chew all day. I like zoon.

Which I am not supposed to chew, but sometimes I do. You chew them? You're not supposed to. Chew my food. I chew my food almost every. That's my favorite. Extra good. I like getting the beef turkey because it's actually.

It's basically gum that is made out of meat. And I really, really enjoy that part of beef turkey. Yeah. I really like beef jerky a lot. Dude, I got pranked by the, another deli item I have to bring up. I got pranked by a new deli because I. You got pranked in New Delhi? I got pranked in New Delhi.

You went to India? I was in fucking India. Yeah, I was walking around India, chilling with my friends. Okay. I've had tons of India. You guys aren't my only friends of the world. I have like 40 Indian friends

that I'd go and hang out with and I visit. That would be awesome if I was like Discord friends with a bunch of Indian guys and I go like twice a year. Every year I go to New Delhi. Yeah. I just chill out. Yeah.

And I show them different stuff. We sing that one song that. They're always making fun of me because I don't know about Indian stuff. I sing that one song. that Jay-Z sampled? Punjabi MC. That song's so good, dude.

That is a really good song. That's one of the best songs of all the time. That is an amazing song. But yeah, I got a last night I was hungry for a snack, and I went and I got, it said, have you seen this dip? It says bitch-in dip. Watch your mouth. Okay, that's what I said out loud when I end the store.

Netflix for a chip? Dip for a chip. Okay. B-I-T-H-E-I-N-A-N-A-P-R-P-R-T-E-E-E-A-N, okay. And it says, and then it has a little guy on it. And he goes like, this dip is nuts. And I was like, okay. So I don't like the branding here.

Is it a nut dip? So that I didn't realize that. Because it doesn't say anywhere, like it doesn't say in big letters like vegan or anything. Right. They hit it behind a pun. So I got spinach artichoke because I was like, oh, that's going to be amazing. I get home and it tastes like fucking pesto. Because it was all sunflower oil and no yogurt and cream.

Okay. So isn't that one of the worst stores? he's ever told. I had to make it one of the most embarrassing moments in my entire life by spitting. It was made out of nuts. It was made out of nuts.

Sunflowers are nuts? Well, it's nuts and seeds. Seed is a nut. The seed is not a kind of a kind of seed, I think. It also had pistachios in it. Okay. Okay, there we go. But it was most of sunflower oil. When I think sunflower, I wouldn't think nut. I would think flower. Yeah. Me. And I could be wrong.

You wouldn't think seed if I said sunflower. No, I would think seed if you said sunflower seed. Again, though, I wouldn't think nut. I'd more think flower. How many times have you eaten a sunflower? A sunflower? Yeah. Like, just grabbed one right off the ground and eaten an entire sunflower.

I got to say. Never. Yeah, I haven't. You've never done that. I can't believe you even had to think of it. I'm trying to think. I don't know. You don't know.

I've walked by a bunch. I'm trying to remember everyone. No. Where do the seeds come from? That's the middle. The middle. Can you show me a picture of one? You'd think, imagine a sunflower.

You know how the sunflower has all that ground crap in the middle. If you wait, it becomes seeds. I know that, but where, like, I haven't never seen a picture of a sunflower with the seeds. What do you mean? It's all that crap in the middle, bro. Oh. Well, that's not the type of, that doesn't look like the food. Yeah, it does.

Look at the one on the right. You take off the top right. That's exactly the food. See, I guess it's not a nut either I've never seen this part That is the same part It's a dead version of a sunflower I've never seen it on that

I've only seen whenever I see a sunflower I always look at that I'm like how the seeds get in there You can get in there? You think they are loaded up How that seed get in there? Like plants versus zombies Yeah

Getting ready to shoot out Yeah that's what I think Oh okay No it's just a big seed It's the plate in the middle Okay Yeah it's pretty easy I'm a big fan of sunflowers

Sunflowers Sunflowers lilies. I haven't had sunflower seeds in a long, long time. I'd stop eating them. When I hang out... To get stuck in my teeth. It's annoying my teeth. When I hang out with my cousins for some reason I'll go through a bag

a day. I probably, if I got into sunflower seeds, we'll be going through a lot. You would like them. If you like gum. If you like gum, you'd like sunflower seeds. I would say they're in the same world. Who's that? From holes. Oh, yeah, yeah. He's the main leader. Yeah. And he eats like a shit ton of

Sunflowers. Yep. John Voight. JV. JV. What happens to that? I can fix it guy in that movie. Anaconda.

Jolie. Night at the museum. Joe Lee. He made Jolie's creator. Jolie? That's Jolie's creator. Jolie was, John Boyd.

You didn't know that? No. Angelina Jolie is John Voight's daughter. I didn't know that. You really didn't know that? That's crazy. Jolie. I don't know anything about Angelina Jolie.

She doesn't talk to him. She doesn't talk to me either. She doesn't talk to me either. I don't know anything about her She hates him for some reason He's a crazy psycho, I guess Yeah, he's a Trumpian Well, is he, or he died?

No, John Voight's alive. Did he die? He died, I don't know you. Yeah, I feel like he died. No, he's alive, man. How do you know? I mean, I don't, I haven't checked him the last couple days.

I thought he died. Dude, what if he dies? Who died? When did this comes out? What do you mean who died? Who died who I'm thinking of? Instead of John Voight? Are you sure he's not dead?

Yeah, he's alive. I'm pretty sure he's alive. What was the last thing he was in? I don't think he does a lot of movies anymore. I think he would, the last thing he was in was Reagan. Go back to images real quick. Look on the right, the top of right.

Oh my God, he's dead. No, that's not him. He died there. Well, it is him, but it's movie special effects. He's not actually dead. This happened. Also, that's not, that's not death. That's just glue.

Dude, they turned him to crispy creams. They fucked him up on set. that they ran a train on him look that's not you think that this is the result of this is the type of bucocchi this is the type of bucocchi when nobody involved had jacked off in three weeks yes yeah and they've been eating a lot of yeah a lot of floridated water look at that stuff that looks good yeah i think i'd eat that does that would kill him that would kill somebody does getting bucoccied on actually feel that good it probably feels like a shower that doesn't go away yeah that sounds awesome to me but i'm afraid that if i tried it even once

would get addicted. It probably actually feels like getting sneezed on slowly. Yeah. What kind of slowly? Yeah, because it's... Oh, I guess, yeah, that makes sense. But also a super sneeze. Yeah, well, some sneezes can give that much.

It doesn't have to be that super. I have never had a sneeze that was on the level of a jizz. You have. I have. Everyone has. Maybe, well... It's not like every sneeze is going to be like that. A single nostril rocket's not.

Yeah, that's kind of happened. When I was in high school, I sneezed one time and just like a full, like, like a little kid from Wind waker. Oh, yeah. Well, that's just a big thing in all sorts of Japanese cultures. You have the nose bubble. Yeah. And then you have the nose bleed, which I've never understood that one.

I have a lot of nosebleeds. But do you see a girl like eat something in a weird way? So the nose blade happens because the cause of a nose bleed more often than not is the blood vessel in your nose. It's very thin. Okay. So an increased blood flow or like a strong pulse can rupture, can rupture, can rupture, yeah. So if you get aroused by a sexy girl, if you're, you get a nosebleed? You're in high school. You see a high schooler. Thank you for saying if you're in high school.

It's true. I just needed to specify, then your blood's going to get pumping when you see that. And it's going to bleed out your nose. I used to get a lot of nosebleeds. If you're in high school and you see a, just a high schooler? High school, a sexy high schooler girl. What the fuck did you just say? If you're in high school, you see that. Yeah, you're going to get a nosebleed. And this used to happen to you daily. Yeah. You like this. yeah okay he liked this i just have never had that experience where i've been aroused by a woman and gotten my bleed yeah i know i know you've never been aroused by a woman you don't need to say that

how can i fix this i don't think what can i possibly do i give up i'm gay what else has been going on bros nothing man nothing i don't even know i don't even know what's been going on it's all shite what's all shite what's all shite I don't know what it did You didn't do Well, I worked on that today's episode history You went to the beach? You went to the beach? Yeah

Which beach? Long Beach. Long Beach? Long Beach. Long Beach? Is you in L.A.? No, man? Long Beach is in Long Island, you fucking Dallon. That's not true. That's not true. Doebrick. Hey, chill the hell out. That's right. David Doebrick. Chill out. You're Dobrick-esque. I'm not Doberkest. You are. You guys been noticing that there isn't. That's a day. That's a day. That's, hey, chill the hell out. That's, you guys. That's his face every time I see him. That is true. That is true.

You guys notice how the spotted lantern flies. They have been as crazy as they have so far. We killed them all. Nah. What? They all went to the beach. Oh my God. There was a trillion of them at the beach and they all drowned themselves in the water.

They're the dumbest bugs I've ever seen. They're really stupid. I think that this makes me want to exterminate them more than ever that they're a bug and they think they belong at the beach. They'll walk into the dog's mouth. Beach bugs belong at the beach. There's a specific subset of a beach bug. You never will be able to get close enough to see what they actually look like. They're just little black dots that run away when you get close.

That's a beach bug. Or the sand lice that jump. Those are good. Sand lice? I don't know if that's what they're called sand lice, sand fleas. But I once. We used to catch them. They're always in like a big pile of kelp.

I'm not talking about you. You're not in my wee. Yeah, we better not be in your wee. You're not even in my used to. Oh. If you're going to act like this First, I'm not in your we, which I'm glad I'm not in your wee. I'm glad

I'm not in your we, but you're used to? We used to catch them. But now, we both? We used to catch them. We never did. Me and others. Not you guys, we. We know, no. But how am I not a part of your wee or you're used to? Not in this part. What about your future?

Wee and never went to the beach together. I don't like the beach. That's the truth. That's true. So how could you be in my we at the beach? Weir's beach. How could you guys get into my wee catching beach bugs? I don't want to be in your wee bug. You used to never at the beach together. You know what?

You know what? Your wee bugs me. Yeah. That's fine. You're part of my wee now. Now I am? You're part of my wee now. But just in this moment.

Wait, I like this. But other moments too in the past. So you might call those used to. But at the beach, again, we never at the beach used to. That's true. But maybe we will see on. we can agree maybe we'll go to the beach together soon why have we never done a beach day i don't like the beach i love the beach i love the beach i keep getting sunburn though this time i got i got cruelly betrayed

what happened to you bro oh can you put sunscreen on my back i can't reach my back can you put sunscreen on my back this is you this is me saying this in my voice that's your perfect impression of you oh can i have sunscreen on my back little do i know you got ice cream on your back that when i get home i got sunburn only on my back. She faked you out. Damn, dude. You were faked out. What got put on instead? Are you worried about it? It was ice cream.

She was probably ice cream. Ice cream. Yeah. Ice cream spray. Ice cream. You guys fuck with the spray sunscreen? Fuck no. Oh, there's you. I don't like it that much. I put it on. I use it the rest of my body. Fine. No sun, no sunburn. I don't like to feel like I was lying out there. I hate the spray sunscreen because you put it on. You feel like you're molting.

I like, the way I like to use the spray sunscreen when I use it is I'd spray and then I spray to get a buildup of the fluid and I and then I use it as if it's normal. That's why I use normal. Instead of going like this, because you're just going to miss. Yeah, it's true. Yeah, it is missed. But you're also just going to get a bunch of little dots where it doesn't exist.

I don't really like sunscreen at all. I hate the feeling of wearing it, but and I like sunburns. I like a little bit of sunburn. I like when you get home from the beach. To peel a sunburn is like a. It's a delicacy. I haven't had that for so long. I get why people, like, are completely beat red.

I saw a guy along beach who was sitting in a line on the beach, and he was a white guy, and he was the color of red velvet cake. Yes, this happens. I saw a bodybuilder last time. I was at the beach at the nude beach. I saw a bodybuilder. You went to the nude beach. I did. I already told you guys I went to the nude beach.

He's on some weird shit. I'm not on some weird shit at all. I didn't go to look. If you had called it the. I didn't even know I was going to a nude beach, and I already told you guys about this, so I give up on trying to... We forgot about it, so we don't want to hear it. Yeah, but I saw a bodybuilder, and he was completely brown, but he was white. Yeah, he was the bronzer.

I knew this kid in high school that would do, like, bodybuilding competitions. In high school? Yeah, he would, like, put on... It's awesome. He would put on, like, the bronzer and stuff, and you would get so, like, you would overdo it. Yeah. Just full, like, he would just do, like, he would just do, like, tumor. And there's, like, photos of him, like, smiling, like, in the competition.

He's smiling while wearing that. And he's like, dude, what the fuck? Well, but also, you know, I would say that most people maybe can recognize that he's a bodybuilder, and it's probably a little different. I didn't. But is he walking around? I thought that he had made it. I thought that he was doing a soul man.

Did he make, you thought that he was doing jazz singer on stage at the bodybuilding competition? That's what you really thought. That's, oh, there's maybe there's a talent portion. Who? That's a good point. That's a very good point. Yeah, that's a 1920s themed bodybuilding competition. That's always what's kept me from becoming a bodybuilder.

You're afraid of the bronzer. I just don't want them to talk because I know myself and I know whenever I bought a car and I know that I would get talked into the darkest possible bronzer by my trainer. And I would say, oh, I don't know about this. And he'd be like, it's all, this is what's going to make you win. I'd be afraid if I won the other guys would try and take me down. Yeah, they would too. And those are tough guys.

You don't want to be on their bad side. The thing is, I know a lot of these guys are probably born into bodybuilding families. Yeah. They grew up in bodybuilding towns. They've had the training. They're about the life. They're rough and tumble. Yeah.

They probably lived their whole lives on the streets up to this point. They probably had a metal house. Look at me. Little dandy, Mr. Dandy coming in, winning the whole thing. They're going to want to tear me to shreds. They're going to think I don't deserve it. Have you seen Love Lies, Believe me? No, that's the one about the female strong.

Yeah. Well, I don't want to spoil me. it too much, but... I heard that they turn into a bug. No, I didn't. I'm lying. But something weird happens to her body. There actually is a crazy thing in the end.

Yeah, she goes like this. Well, the entire time I was thinking, I watched this movie when I was like, okay, there's got to be some kind of twist here. Like, this is cool that it's like this crime thing, but there's not a lot going on. But then every time that she touches anything in the movie, it goes like, like, anytime she touches somebody, it goes, like, as if she was punching them and, like, a kung fu movie and she like rips off uh james franco's brother's jaw off of his face yeah that guy and it every time she does anything that has the most insane cartoonish like hulk sound effects

and then at the end she becomes a giant like 50 foot tall woman is that true yeah it's true maybe i got to see this movie it's kind of awesome i was like i would say i liked it okay and then that happened i was like this movie is fucking yeah yeah it's i like when movies have a have a crazy part at the end. Yeah. Backwards man. What's that movie? Freddy got fingered?

No, the other backwards man. The backwards man. I can want backwards fast. Yes, you can. The backwards man? The backwards woman who has a man on his back. Oh, malignant. Malignant.

That's another one where at the end you go. The whole movie you're going, this is pretty good. And I've seen X-Dens, the commercials with that white guy. Bob. Bob. so Bob I didn't even realize that when I was a kid Bob was laying down some of the most insane dick that a penis had ever been

It was working again It was working it was Is that what the line was? No, No, that's the implication Bob from Extends Bob from Extends Yeah, Bob's furniture though

You can tell that man You can tell he was slanging He's not slinging You don't get a claymation model Made of yourself if you're not slanging That's true Same with Empire And by the way the claymation model

is anatomically correct So you might want to be careful Unfortunately, Jordan's furniture, he was never claymation. No, and he's not sling. He does not lay it down. He's got zero dick game. No.

The Jordan's furniture guy. There's a reason that when you go into Bob's furniture and you're looking to buy a couch, 99% of the couches are going to see a fucking stain on it. And that's because Bob is in the background hitting it. Bob's using it. He's used. He's a single one. Pristine.

In the plastic. And also, he's really compensating with that movie theater. Yeah. You can, you walk in. You maybe see one couch with a single thing. stain on it, you look closer to stay in the shape of two butt cheeks. Jordan was sitting there watching IMAX on it. And his name's Elliot actually. And maybe

a little bit of brown in the middle of the butt cheek prints. Yeah. See, Bob got brown. But Bernie and Phil in different spots. Yeah. Yeah. In the mouth. Bernie and Phil, though. They don't need acclamation because you can tell they were in love. Yeah, because they're busy being up in the rafters at the Muppet show. Who's

that? That's Statler and Waldorf. Who's Bernie and Phil? Raymore and Flanagan. Wait. I can't be the same. Bernie and Phil was a husband and wife duo. Ew. Who made the sexual furniture ads on the, on the tea?

Oh, I remember that where it was like, it would be like, I'm a tall bookcase with a big dick and I want to get fucked. What are those ads? Was that Bernie and Phil? It might have been Bernie and Phil.

There's no way. Sexual Boston subway ads. They were so crazy. Yeah. It would be like, I'm a black bed and I want to suck a white dick. I don't think the bed said it wanted to suck a dick It did, they basically did, yeah

It was like supposed to be like the Yeah, it was Bernie and Phil's. It was Bernie and Phil's? Yeah, yeah. What the hell? You never saw these, bro? No. These are disgusting.

These are crazy. These were the most disgusting things I've ever seen. Oh, wait, I, okay. Continue without supporting, please. Bro, what are you doing? Yep, he's never been on a website before. Continue with that support. I go both, oh, okay.

Wait, no, I remember. I remember. All bonds, brunettes, and redheads are more than welcome. If you love leather, you'll love me. Sectional's in stock. This is one of the tamer ones, I think. Yeah, some of them were really, some of them have the wordic and strong. Look up a photo of Bernie and Phil.

Look up Bernie and Phil's and then see, see what these two look like. And they're saying stuff like this. So they're saying things like this. I see them. Oh, these two? These two. Those two on the. Look, they're getting down with five altogether.

That's not them. That's not a photo of them. Those are just random guys. It's the girl. Right there. Right there. These two. Bernie Rubin dies of coronavirus. What? That's what it said.

That's what the picture of this picture happened. Put that on an ad. Well, Phil was dead. My dad died of Corona. What about this furniture is sexual? If you're going to make ads like this, your furniture could at least look a little ravishing. Yeah. A guy like me.

Sectional. Sectional instead of a sexual couch instead of a sexual. This is, this has to be some, this has to, this is one of the couches I least would want to have sex with. Bernie? You're saying that these, the couches. You're saying that lady looks like a fucking couch. Well, yeah, but I'm not, I saw what I'm talking about right now. I'm talking about the couches and those are not very, uh, erotic.

No, they're not erotic. I wouldn't even want to have sex on the couch, let alone with the fucking cat. No, I'd rather be on the floor under the couch. I'd rather be on the shag carpet. Did you guys ever know anybody who had shag carpet? No. Who got down like that? No.

My grandparents had shag carpet. You know what they were. doing on it. Fucking shagging. Making me. Your grandparents are making you. Your grandparents had you. Yeah.

They made me on the shag rug. That's interesting. Has that interesting. I'm not going to talk about it, man. Okay. I don't want to talk about your grandparents fucking. I do. Not on here.

Not on the show. On the, on the podcast about list, but on the recap show. On a different show that I just invented called Caleb's Grandparent's Sexual Report. do a we should do you know those that that the video that's on TV yes TV show you know that TV show that's like where I came from or whatever they take celebrities and they figure out where what their ancestry is we should do that but you try my dad try to figure out exactly like

try to crime scene set up exactly how you were conceived like do all the math interview your parents go back to Disney World or wherever it happened and you get the exact hotel room and you lay down on that bed and you go wow You think about it. You're like, okay. Here I am. And you're doing like, you're like, my mom was like this. You pull your legs up behind your bed.

My dad was like this. And then he came on her face like this. You do the entire thing. You came on her face? And then she wiped it off. And then I guess she did that. That's a good idea. That's a good idea for a show, yeah.

And you would do it with celebrities too. So then you'd have to have. You'd have like, you have to have Dennis Leary's dad explain how he jizzed on his mom's inside inside of his mom's honor and then you'd have to yeah so it'd be like the dad explains it and then they have like a a one-to-one recreation of the hotel room and then the celebrity has to reenact it as best as they can and if they get it one-to-one if they do it correctly they win a million dollars they win one million dollars but it goes to charity celebrity like who wants to be a millionaire that's a great idea you just made it so much better of a show

It's, it's, because no celebrity is going to want to. You can do anything on TV if it's going to go to charity. Yeah, exactly. You can, people are like, do we really want to see the celebrity describe their dad fucking their mom? And it's like, well, so you don't want to, you don't like the charity. They also have to use a dummy. Yeah. It'd be better to use real people.

No, it's one celebrity, one dummy. I think it's a lookalikes of the parents. I think it's a dummy that looks exactly. No, I think it's a male celebrity. If it's a male celebrity, it looks exactly like your mom. If it's a female celebrity, it looks exactly like your dad. It should be Norbit. You should have to play every single role.

You should have to do the entire thing. Then you have to knock on the door and you're the room service guy. And then you have to clean it up. Right. The janitor at the end. You have to clean up. You have to mop your mom's. I guess there's enough movie magic nowadays that you could do this.

There's plenty. You'd be able to do it easily. There's a lot of movie magic nowadays. That's my idea for a TV show. Speaking of movie magic. Are we there? Yeah. Okay.

Guys, have you ever seen the one episode of The Simpsons where the critic walks over and he lives in their world now? Yeah, yeah. And then I never watch the rest of that show. No, it doesn't seem like that interesting of a show.

It's stupid. I've heard it's good. I know, I've heard it's good, but I also heard Darias is good because it's about a family. Yeah. I'm not going to watch a movie about some critic. Yeah, I don't want to hear about a critic.

Ew. Every day, I'm sitting around trying to learn more about the families in my neighborhood. I also get if a critic lived in my neighborhood I would close my eyes when you walked by I also I go to TV to escape my life not relive at every single fucking episode

which is what the critic is again I go to TV to learn more about family yeah you already said that and it did strike me as a little odd I want to know so what kind of TV shows do you watch if that's what you're interested in Simpsons but like name one other show with a family that you watch well there's that one show with a yellow family family matters

The last name was yellow. Well, the logo is yellow. Oh, right. I can't say I watched that one. I think of a different one. Bart. Full house. Yeah.

Full house. Bart's house. The house is full of Simpsons. Bart's house, Homer's House. No, that's not. It's one show. It's two shows. I've seen, like, lots of different ones, though.

Like maybe 32 different. Well, yeah, there was one show where Bart had to escape from this guy who is. Is Bart? your word for son? Bart is Bart. Okay, it's a real character. So it is the Simpsons. I watched this other show with a guy named Homer.

Yeah, it's the same show. No, you don't understand. He had a dream that God was real. And then he bounced through the window. Remember? Like from the Giff? Well, yeah, but again, that's the Simpsons. But I saw them on different days.

That, I can't argue with that. If it's on a different day, it's a different show, right? It's a different episode. So maybe the conversation, it should really be, do you know what an episode? A doctor said I had many episodes and I need to be put away. I can tell. I can tell because you've lost your mind.

Guys, this is all about movie critics because that's just an idea that we had. That's the reason. It has nothing to do with any day. I found this guy, The Movie Geek. I'm pretty excited about this guy. Welcome to The Movie Geek, a blog where all we review, classics and updated movies with 100% honesty

from horrible to good we will get the details and bring them to you all so thank you all for reading and enjoy the blog I like you yeah you're welcome I like this

you don't say you're welcome the movie geek says you're welcome he said thank you all for reading so this is his thing Eric's top six actresses he has a crush on

dare post I was challenged by a friend to post this so enjoy so I like about his website is that it's clearly a little kid who keeps pretending that it's like a team of people

and like refers to it as like we here at the movie geek and but then it immediately gives it away by the way that he writes I didn't do this for my presentation because none of the actual posts were funny but I found a blog called like movie kid movie critic

called himself movie kid Zach and I was looking at it and I realized like I did the math from like when the first post was and he's like still posting on a 2022 and he's like still posting on movie kidzac.com or whatever. He was like 27 years old. And it's just normal movie reviews.

Respect, man. It's really funny. You know, I was looking at all these blog spots, and every single blog spot I found had like a, when they ended the blog, like in memoriam posts. Yeah. Where it's like, it's finally come to an end. Yeah. And I love the, I read every single one.

That's why it took me so fucking long to make this. Okay, Eric's top six actresses. He has a crush on Dare Post. Number one, Hillary Duff. go next number two emma watson my second crush in haughty goes to her moni i love her accent sense the first harry potter film i thought she is a hottie then she became a feminist and lost my interest but she's still number two next the sponge bob square pant sponge out of water view that's the other thing is that he almost exclusively reviews like kids movies and like horror movies

that it's clear that his dad just let him watch one time. Okay, the first SpongeBob movie was not great, but it was watchable. But the sequel, just awful. It was a quick cash in for them. This movie had it all. Bad acting, bad story,

bad jokes, and bad CGI that made the Smurfs cry. Boom. If this was just animation, it would probably pass my test. But come on, seeing 80% on Rotten Tomatoes for this crap that is a dishonest. There are other shows on Nick,

old and new, that deserves something. This is just a fucking stupid movie, have nothing good to say, God we got it for free because it's garage. I feel sorry for the parents that had to pay full price in theaters gave this one a skip. I feel sorry for the parents who had to pay. The way that he gives it up is so funny. I feel sorry for all the parents. Yeah. I love all the stuff. When movie kids review movies, they always do the thing too where they're like they'll watch a movie that's like a rom-com or something. Yeah. It's like for like stupid adults. Yeah. And

they'll be like, this is a mature movie. Yeah. For the parents out there. And they'll be like, I enjoyed it. Like, it'll be like a 12 year old kid. And he'd be like, I, I enjoyed this. But I wouldn't recommend it for any kid under 15. Yeah.

Yeah. Whatever their age is one year under. No, they say it. They're like saying older. Oh, that's a good point. They're smart. Yeah, they're pretending to be a couple years older. Yeah.

This is for daddy Amazon. Daddy Amazon B tagline is 13 going on eternity. This one I hated. The CGI and voice acting is horrible, and the mummy and pirate just never shut the hell up and are annoying as hell, with the animation being ugly, creepy like food fight. The only one that's okay will be the main character Dixie, but even she can't save it or can't save, but it did something to get a sequel, I still can't believe it. The only thing I can say without ruining the film, Dixie has a magic charm that evil wants, and the my villain makes me want to bash my head into the wall as hard as I can. sounds like that voice actress that voice Barbara Streisand in South Park

but for a four foreign film before we got a hold of it could have been good but that's a big maybe and I like some foreign films but have not seen that many S C E and E but everything just falls apart for me where I need a beer or two

or maybe something harder like Scotch to get over watching this really annoying film with a two out of ten the movie kids did the exact same thing he was like, this would be a good movie to knock back a couple of beers. I need a scotch to get through daddy.

I'm a zombie. It's so clear he's like, he's like a big fan of like AVGN or something or like one of these like older like movie reviewer guys that watches like kids movies. Yeah. Oh, I couldn't even get through this without like my rolling rock. Yeah, yeah.

Like he's just like parroting like stuff that like older people say. Exactly. My thoughts on Hotel Transylvania 2. Hotel Transylvania 2 was freaking Hawaii. Worth every penny, the smart-ass cast they got for this trilogy. Yes, it's confirmed by Sony, there will be a third, but that's okay because this film makes you want more because of the wonderful animation and characters. This is Sony Pictures Toy Story and Shrek, but anything past the third may just push it for me. But we know studios, they will rape it as long as it makes money.

I would love to see this movie get more love and push more with merchandise because it's worth it. That's like the funniest, like I forgot. this like when you're like 11 or 12 and you're like just like starting to like learn stuff like that like like he says like still well studios will rape it yeah whatever but you're still like watching kids movies yeah this like that's like I was so good about this website is the way that he approaches all of these little kids movies like so cynically yeah where he's like yeah fuck at the studio that's the fun that's the fun that's the fun of being nobody no kid wants to be a movie critic to be like this was a trip to another

world you want to be smarmy that's exactly they want to be super smart me and they want to like avatar 2009 yeah exactly uh next one is the gallows what a piece of garage of a film again the garage thing the gallows wasn't worth review so hear my thoughts warning spoilers just click to bring it up so this is how this kid watches movies he has a notes app in his phone where he goes every single time he has a thought he writes it down. The gallows. So far sucks.

Found film style. Actor holding camera. Throw out the film. Annoying deuce that doesn't shut the fuck up. Bad teen actors. The female drama geek is hotter than the cheerleader. Dad hates son for quieting football. Breaks into school.

Stupid jump scares still sucks. Nothing happening. Bored as hell. More stupid jumps scares. Making noises doesn't make this creepy. I like that he's reading this for a son. Charlie shows up with no paid off Charlie sucks balls

not going to be a go next not going to be a horror icon annoying deuce gets kill first thanks God then the cheerleader not surprised that you that looks painful

but died already you useless person it's his dad fault please end please end just fucking end already hot drama geek lives no shock and it ends with great disappointment

and everyone looks piss not even worth a movie's nine ticket fill sorry for any Oh, sorry. Phil sorry for anyone that paid full price. Stop with this shit. No more of this type of filming. Nobody likes shaking camera. Fuck this shit. I'm done. So what is Movies 9? And is that a movie theater? And does that mean that he was writing this on his notes at in the movie theater?

He is definitely in the movie theater. I think he's saying a $9 ticket. Yeah. A movie's $9 ticket. Phil, sorry for anyone to pay full price. So he's sitting there the entire time. Imagine you're watching a movie. You look to your right. There's a little kid who's like, fucking shit. An annoying deuce die already And please Just fucking end

Top 12 best movies of 2015 Here we go These are our top 12 best movies of 2015 These are the films that we thought was worth seeing We hope you liked the list for last year Because it was a hard one Number 12 Goose bumps

Growning up reading these books Was the high life of the day Now with a movie It was a great to bring back those memories. Bring books to life is nothing new. But instead of breaking the books up into different movies, this one just works with the idea of books come to life. A great fun family comedy. Wow. Next. Number eight, Hotel Transylvania 2. The first one was good and the second was even better. Mavis and Johnny are now proud parents. Still have no idea how vampire became pregnant,

but who cares. What makes his movie great is the cast of smart asses they got for the roles. You can tell that his dad has called him like, smart ass and he's like yeah these are smart at me of you yeah uh number seven inside out another great animation film with the voices in our heads pixar cannot go wrong another fun family film that worth watching with your little ones yeah this guy is going to grow up to be a high paid movie critic for sure absolutely pixar can not go wrong another great animation film with the voices in our heads another one the avengers age of ultron scarlet johansson scarlet johansson you are so freaking Hot. The Avengers the World, most

mightest hero. The reason these films are great is the characters in the balance of comedy and action, one of the best Marvel movies, and where the hell is my Black Widow movie, you asshole. It's coming. Just hold on. He didn't realize. He didn't realize. Now, but he was in for a big tree. Yeah. And I think this is

the last one. Number one, Jurassic World. The reason is sample. Dinosaurs. One of my favorite franchise is Jurassic Park. I can watch these every single minute of the day. Can't not get enough. Yes, the dinosaurs look like CGI cartoons in this one, but the park is now opened and a great adventure to watch.

The park is open. Wow. The reason is sample. Dinosaurs. Thank you very much, the movie geek. Dinosaurs. That's great. All right. Now, I found, first I found this blog called Horrothon. And let me read the

rules of Horrothon to you real quick. The first rule of Horrothon is watch horror movies. The second rule of Horrathon is right about it. warn us, tempt us. The one who watches the most movies in 31 days wins. There is no prize. Okay, so you don't really win.

And, uh, bragging rights. I won the horathon. Yeah. Yeah, but it's just a thon. Wish I won the horathon. No, you don't. Yeah. Well, they, this critic, whoever runs horathon, had a lot to say about Kirsten Dunst.

There's like so many articles about Kirsten Dunst, all from 07. Apparently there was, talents that we have. Well, I forgot that, like, dudes really hated her in Spider-Man in 07. I don't know. Well, they said that one, she had horrifying feet. Two, she should refrain from trying

to be funny. Three, she's kind of a bitch. Four, she overestimates her value. Five, she wears ugly glasses. And then there's two pictures here. Spidey didn't like kissing MJ, which was an article about, like, how Toby McGuire didn't want to kiss her. What?

And then this next one is... Toby McGuire, you a fool. for that. This one is making fun fun of her teeth apparently. Nah, man. That ain't right.

She's one of the greatest talents we have. Well, yeah, I got so mad I had to read a different website. It pisses me off. So I found a website full of the greatest

critics on Earth fans of the Star Wars movies. These are the Jedi Council forums. The Force.net presents the Jedi Council forums.

And these, Star Wars fans are the biggest critics in the world. So I was like, okay, let's take a look into the mind of these critics.

The biggest critics are the biggest critics in the world. The biggest critics of Star Wars. Well, that would probably be true. Every single Star Wars fan has, they're the biggest critics. They're the biggest critics of the Star Wars franchise. No, they hate Star Wars. They have their own little way of one. Star Wars fans hate Star Wars.

It is funny that it means so much to people and it really was just kind of a... It's nothing. Yeah. It's just, uh... It's just crap. The guy, what's his name? George Lucas. George Lucas was kind of fucking around.

Yeah. And he accidentally made the whole world. and then there's yeah it's just a form of people saying like oh this like this new movie sucks or oh this week but I wanted to see how I want to see what makes a

critic tick so I was going through critic I want to see them what makes them critique and what makes them cry yeah what makes them cry and what makes them do whatever and these are some of the these are some of the most genius posts these are some of the

These are some of the most genius posts I've ever found. We're going to send you to a class for segways. What makes them do whatever. Next, next slide. I'm going to send you to boarding school. Darth Jaguar asks, am I the only one who likes the smell of WD40? Next one. No, you're not.

I love that. Why are hot girls so stuck up in snobby? True as fuck. We should definitely do a deep dive on these Star Wars websites. On the Jedi Council, a deep dive investigation into the Jedi Council. There's so many good. forum posts on here that just I had to just pick like

this stuff that kind of sucks next one China looks like a man thread status not open for further replies the female wrestler oh okay this is from 2005 from Jedi John next slide I can't open my jar of

sliced beetroot by halibut and his name is in red so that's like a moderator and it's in United Kingdom I would like to get to the United Kingdom section of this forum. Oh, yeah. Next slide. Bicurious or bisexual?

Please explain to me from B-FET, August 31st, 2005. It seems that many of the women and some of the men on here claim to be bicurious. I assume that means they've never had a relationship with another person of the same sex, but are attracted to them. Am I right or way off base? I think bisexual people are greedy, by the way. Thank you. This is not the thread for people that.

are homosexual exclusively, only people that are attracted to both. Personally, I'm 100% straight, but I'm comfortable enough to say that certain guys are attracted, but I'm not attracted to them, though. So post here if you are by, and please explain your position. And Emperor Billy Bob said, bisexuality is so trendy lately. And the D says turn it into a book. Also, he's wrong that he's 100% straight if he knows that men are attractive. You know, he's 100% gay.

Yeah. That is... All the way. All the way. He is a gay. If you can tell the difference between two men, you are gay. You are completely gay. Well, this next one was the announcement that Garden State would be in theaters.

That's huge. The trailer for Garden State. Never seen it. You've never seen it? No. Well, I'm sure you won't see it after Yoda, Yo Mama, asks this question because the answer was no. uh since everyone else is afraid to ask i'll do it does she remove her clothes the answer is no the answer is no natalie portman oh because they liked her when she was a child in the movie that they

okay that makes sense why that got posted here okay i see that's no that's good this is another great post on there from another critic star wars agent who said i like big butts and i cannot lie you other brothers can't deny and they said l-o-l i love this song. I know it shows that mostly black men like big butts, but I'm here to tell you that's not true. I'm not black and I love them. But the song does speak about brothers liking big butts. Guess that's why my ex married a brother when I go club and I find myself approaching the big butted women. And when I realized, and then I realized it when I heard that song. I like to say something instead of saying that's hot like white chicks do, maybe I could say that's juicy.

that's a good idea he could get that started that's juicy that's juicy well this i mean it's been a while we could bring it back bring back that's juicy bring back that's juicy in the club 2005 that's juicy that's juicy but he said that's hot like white girl which that that's that's paris hilton says that when she like sees like a dog in a bag in nature yeah she goes like that's hot so now we got to start saying that's juicy that's juicy interesting movie trailers yeah The next one, a critic asked, okay, I think my cousin is hitting on me. Every time we talk, she gets awfully close to me and stuff.

She just put her hand on my leg. I think she is hitting on me. She's awfully hot, though. Here's a picture. And I couldn't see the picture that he posted. He posted a picture of his cousin to the Star Wars forum. And he said, oh, by the way, she isn't a first cousin. She's like my mom's cousin's daughter.

And the moderator, Brea, says, I realize I am locking this a bit late, but I want to make sure that this topic is not up. Now, for why I'm locking this, far too many posts in here are borderline or do actually cross the line of appropriateness. Posts are not supposed to be sexually oriented and far too many are. This topic is just not okay. That's bullshit. So because of that, I went to a different website, a different Star Wars collector's website. If you're not allowed to fuck your cousin's website, I don't want to be here.

No. I went to a different website, which is another Star Wars collector's website. uh rebel scum forums okay i found a lot of very good stuff on here it's gonna be pg 13 hard r style oh yeah hard r like a hard r rated movie oh okay yeah fucking what's wrong with you you racist i thought that's what you meant it's wrong with you man your that's what that word means no hard r like a movie hard r is like yeah hard ar movie i thought that that's what that meant oh my god do you will you see a rated r on a movie poster you go Jesus Christ what the hell No, the phrase hard R.

Yeah, like a movie that's like borderline in C-17. Oh, no. Is that where the phrase? Not a movie flick. Is that where the phrase hard R comes from? That is what it means. That's what it means. This whole time I thought it was only racist.

Oh, that's because you are only racist. Yeah, you have never seen a movie and you've only been racial. Okay. Well, the next slide, my wife drives me crazy sometimes does yours. And Kengar says, is a pun on Ken and Dengar. uh says is ken from well his name is ken oh and dengar is a bounty hunter so he's ken gar so he's ken gar so he's ken girl okay and he says nothing that i'm willing to post on a public forum okay and what about geister what is that that's just his name oh okay but he says once you understand

women it's time to die that's you could almost be said in a darth vader voice yeah that's a crazy good george lucas writing style once you understand women it's time to die Next slide. Well, this is a review of Mind of Mencia. Carlos Mencia of Mind of Mancia. I love that guy. He is so funny. I don't care what people think.

If anyone has seen his DVD, no strings attached, he makes some valid points about laughter. Then the forum went on, and people were talking about how Joe Rogan has just recently gone in on him. Wow. At the comedy story, storm the stage. And Mr. Pickle says most comedians are back in Joe on this one, dudes. Yep.

Thank you, Mr. Pickle. Thank you, Mr. Pickles. For supporting life comedy. And then this next, these are some more, like, good questions that I found from other critics who said, you don't have to keep saying critics.

They're critics. They're critics. You just wanted to do a Star Wars episode. Yeah. In fact, your pitch was that we do an entire Star Wars episode. Yeah, well, I already did all this research, so I didn't want to change things.

This isn't even the episode we were going to do Star Wars when we were playing it out. But you don't let it slide, but you don't have to, fake it. It's crazy. You think nobody can see what you're doing?

You think you tricked us? I thought it was supposed to be a movie-centric episode. It is. Yeah, it is. But you were talking about critics, and then I was like, oh, shit, I don't think I have, I don't think these are really critical.

They are not. And they almost have nothing to do with the movies, but they have a lot to do with the movie website. What has any of these have to do with the movie website? Well, the Garden State one. Yeah, the Garden Day one's about a movie. That was a movie. Well, anyway, here,

Kubert asked questions about Flintstone's chewable vitamin. Cubert also asked, what's your favorite safety mascot as a kid? Cubert also asked, which got locked. Which do you like better as sunrise or sunset?

That's so funny. That is a text. And then another. These were off. Okay, I put these in here because yes, these all sound like text. Text that you would send me.

Literally, I think I've gotten two of these before as techs from Patrick. Which are like better. Another loss. Also, these bottom three were all locked and we're like, you stop posting shit like this on the four of them. You fucking idiot. They all-time favorite way. Hubert. Yeah, who's your all-time favorite Haynes brother?

And let's talk about checks. Both of those you sent me before. Another locked thread was, should a six-old? 16-year-old girl be working at Hooters? Well, it depends on the position. Dishwasher? Yeah, that's fine. Back of house.

Yeah, back of house. Next slide. Next slide. Creative ways to ask a girl to prom from Indiana Vader. And then Kubert came back to ask, how old is too old to go to the prom? They said, what's up people? He's trying to ask.

Ask his best friend's little sister to prom because she doesn't have a date. But the problem is he's 23. He's asking her and she's 23. I mean, that's crazy. She can go to the prom. Plus, she's kind of cute.

Only I know that people are going to give me a whole bunch of poop about it because I'm a little older. So that's why I haven't asked her yet. So what would you guys do? By the way, she's 18 and I just turned 23 last month is how old I am. So we're like five years apart. Kubert, I'm here to answer this for you.

you probably shouldn't take her. At the very least way for her to ask you, man. Yeah. It's coming, Cuba. She will ask, and that's all my slides. Okay. So another more critical analysis. Pure critical analysis front to back.

That of my slides? No, I'm saying that this was an amazing show. So we've all, we've all, so far, all our presentations we've talked about movies and reviews of movies. I think we should have made the episode about movies It is about movies It seems You think we should have made it about Star Wars I think there wasn't

I don't think there was any unclearness about that Well Because you wanted to make it about Star Wars Yeah I think you found one movie's website And then you got distracted I think that's maybe what happened

A bunch of slides about Star Wars Well not even so much Anyway By the reason I'm saying that We've been talking about movies And from the past Yes Because you're going to go

Most of the time you're going to open up a movie review website you're going to look for reviews and it's all about movies that are already out that people have already seen, right? But the thing is, the fact is most of us decide whether or not to see a movie

before it even comes out. That's a good point. We look at the poster, we see the release tape, we think, I think I'm going to try to go see that, right? So what I want to do today is have us give some reviews

for I went on IMDB. IMDB has a section for upcoming movies that aren't out yet. All these are from IMDB that I found on there. So I'd like us to go through and give reviews predict

kind of of give her views as if we've seen these movies so people out there in the audience can decide

whether or not they're going to go see these movies when they do hit theaters. I'm looking forward to rating this movie.

Well, let's go through and let's talk about some of these movies and we can review them. These are all upcoming on IMDB.

These are all from IMDB. So we've probably seen the trailers and the movie yeah, I'm sure you have. I'm sure everyone's seen most of these trailers.

All right. So this one is Bagman coming out in 2024. When a sinister threat from his childhood returns to haunt him A father desperately struggles against his deepest

Interfere. Only this time, the fight isn't for himself. It's for his family. Isn't Bagman from Little Big Planet? Bagman, I was thinking that this was going to be a stealth sequel to the Batman. Which is why I put this in here. That's probably a good... Yeah, wait, it's only one letter off.

Yeah. It probably is just a sequel to the Batman. Or at least it's a Batman reboot. And it looks like the Joker. And it says, he's always closer than you think. People thought the Batman sequel wasn't coming out for a while. But here it comes. But here it comes. So, yeah, my review is, I love this movie. Robert Pattinson thrilled me to my core.

Yeah. I was on the edge of my seat the whole time. Only big letdown is the typo in the title. Confusion. Yeah, that's a good review. I almost didn't see this because of the typo. I would say... Five stars, by the way.

Out of what? 5. 10. Okay. I'm going to give this... I'm going to get... Okay, the sequel is never as good as the original. Yeah. So I'm going to get, especially with Batman movies.

I'm going to give it a 6 out of 10. And I'm going to say, leave Bagman for the next one. Or for the next one, go Batman. Bagman was a huge misstep in the Man series. I'm going to say five out of five stars. Wow. They say the sequel is never better than the original. But this one blew me out of the water.

I was expecting a bag. A pool screen in a pool screen. And I saw it in a wave pool. I said at the pool at Universal Studios Hard Rock Hotel. And it blew me out of the water. I thought that this movie was going to be about a bag man, but then swooping across the silver screen, here he is, Mr. Pattinson himself.

And when you don't expect Batman, it's a big surprise. Five out of five stars. So this one, I think, certified fresh. I'm going to certify it as a medium. Yeah. Overripen tomato. That's so two out of three say that this is five out of five. Okay.

Two out of three critics say it's five to five. But yeah, I think this one we can comfortably say maybe check it out. Okay. I'll give you that. Go make your own decision with bad man. Let's look at the next one here. Lover of Men, the untold history of Abraham Lincoln, 2024, examines the intimate life of America's most consequential president, Abraham Lincoln.

Now, I'll start out with my review. Kind of iffy on this one. This is a documentary, and I'm not usually a documentary fan, but I thought, oh, I like history. Abraham Lincoln, he's interesting to me. I was a little confused why they asked for my ID at the door, but I quickly began to understand as the movie ran on. There wasn't much information.

No. A lot of visuals that I could. If I was at home, if I was at home in bed alone, I might like it. I might like. But in a theater, surrounded by history buffs, it wasn't for me. I would say I'm giving this a 10 out of 10

one of the most honest tellings of the life story of Mr. Patrick Doran that has ever been put to film this was an amazing movie and I'm going to say again this movie blew me out of the water again because it was a double feature at the pool

Loverman and Bagman As soon as I as I got back into the water this movie blew me out because this double feature is one you surely shouldn't miss. Love her of men gets five out of five stars. This movie

made me find out that the thing about. What was your favorite scene? The thigh slapping side. The scene you should say at the end of your review, you'd say P.S. The thing about where you pee in the water and it turns purple is false.

So if you're a documentary fan or a fan of imagery? Yeah, if you like imagery, check this out. Check out. Check out lover of men. Let's see what else is coming out in the next couple years. Okay, this movie is called Virginia Water Lake. Wow. Here's the summary.

Jackson made plan with two sisters, Alina and Dina, to visit Virginia Water Lake. Jackson is nature lover. He likes summer and flowers. They went and fun there. Virginia Water Lake is natural of beauty. This is a story about Virginia Water Lake, directed and written by Kumad Pant.

Mud Pant Kumud Pant And this is coming out this year in 2024 So I'm not familiar with With Mr. Pants You're not really

Okay So I This I'll say this fits into his Uvr Neatly Okay I found myself enthralled Whatever is some of his other works

I won't talk about them yet Oh okay Gotcha I because I can't You can't I'm actually under embargo For those Because you got a screener.

Yeah, I screened when I watched this movie. It's terrifying. I see why they call them screeners because I was screening all and running all over my house. But if you have allergies, don't see this in 4D. Okay. See, what I'm going to say about this movie is pants folds. Pant folds. This movie was a shit.

Whoa. I fucking hate nature. Shit in the pants. shit and this movie left me panting from the excitement

the thrill ride I couldn't believe what I saw in Virginia Water like Alina and Dina the actresses who portray

Alina and Dina turn in career performances as flowers go over to your pantry and get some

popcorn come on come on over to your pantry get some popcorn spill it on your pants

and then make mud because this is one of the best movies of the year. If you like winter and skulls, this is not for you, though. No. I will say it's well crafted, but you most likely won't enjoy it. This is for summer fans and flower heads. Yeah, flower heads show up. You're not going to want to miss this one.

Yeah. So that's Virginia Water Lake. Okay. Let's see what else is coming out. The Wish Fish. Wow. 2025, so we're into next year. A boy named Billy finds love and friendship during the best summer of his life

and learns a lot from a magic talking fish he wins at the carnival. Enjoy watching Billy navigate through obstacles in his coming of age romp and short time the boys so now it's multiple boys start to notice there's something fishy about these wishes they never seem to never turn out the way the boys were thinking they would budget 70,000 dollars see wow I'm noticing here I just want to throw this out there really quick the boys capitalized B yeah see still I was good yeah I was gonna say I didn't think that the boys big screen debut would be involving a fish right so what I yeah my review But finally, finally, an expansion of the lore of Amazon's classic series, The Boys.

Finally, we're leaving behind the superheroes, the gore, the swearing, the sexual content. And we're focusing on what matters. Fish. Boys, fish, and wishing. Yeah. And the carnival. I would give this a two out of five, and I would say that I didn't realize how much of the movie was going to be him navigating through obstacles. Because it was basically an episode of wipeout.

There was so many obstacles. in this. Yeah. And I wish that it focused on the fish more. The budget, about the fish,

though, the budget really shines. You can tell they spent every cent of that 70,000 on the fish. The fish looks very real. The fish is huge.

This is maybe one of the biggest fishes I've seen in cinema since 2003's big fish. That bowl is too small. Yeah, the bowl, but here's the thing. There's only $70,000.

That's a low budget. That's nothing. You're not going to afford a big bowl and a fish. You're getting paid minimum wage as an actor. Yeah. at that level.

The wish, that's the wishfish, 2025. Well, I'm excited for it. Let's look at the next one here. Oak 2025. A group of teenagers dare each other to touch a cursed oak tree, which leads to the disappearing

of one of the group and another gets a rash on her palm leading to a battle for survival. Now, I looked at the cast fear. This starred Catherine DeDario, and I was like, oh, I wonder if she's related to any celebrities. Turns out it says on her IMDB page,

she's the granddaughter of Emilio Didario. Who's Amelia DeDario? DiDario. He's got an IMPB. He hasn't been in any movies, but he has an IMTP. Okay. Who's this other guy?

This is the act, of course, Nurse Kane, character in the movie, we all know, played by Burns Burns. Burns, Burns. I've seen Burns.

Burns. Burns and some things. Burns does a great job burnsing down the oak. As Nurse Kane. As Nurse Kane. Scary name for a nurse cane. I had to say the effects for the rash

were riveting. The rash on the palm, horrifying. I do like the poster, the poster school. Yeah, I would give this a 7 out of 10. Okay. I would say that it would be a lot scarier if the rash wasn't immediately solved with cream. It was more interesting.

Well, yeah, well, Nurse Kane is a very good nurse. Very good nurse, yeah. With creams. I would give this a 10 out of 10, you know. I thought that Didario shines again in another amazing role. Yeah, and it's just, it is, I will say, though, it is too bad than Nepo Babies. yeah yeah amelia regardless of her

i would say that in this movie she overcame the nepotism accusations she kind of showed yeah showed that she actually deserved a seat at the table because this yeah at oak because this was an amazing once in a lifetime oscar winning

performance out of the didario twins Oscar there's your pick what this is your Oscar pick this is a I would say this is a front running best picture wow wow for me 2025, look out for it.

All right, let's check the next one here. Now we have the grundles. Oh, no. This is a bit of another scary movie. After a botched scaring, a family of monsters decides to kidnap the children who foiled their plan for one final scare. But upon entering the house, something happens. None of them could have predicted. They befriend the children and decide to team up for the mischief of the greatest kind along the way learning a valuable lesson.

Just because someone looks different doesn't mean you can't share common ground. See, I hate. The grundles. I hate. They're friendly neighborhood monsters. There goes the neighborhood. I hate these movies that put... You learn everything from it in the summary. Yeah.

You really spoiled the whole movie. We've already seen it, so I don't know why you guys are worried about the spoilers. Well, but I'm worried for the other people who haven't seen it. For the people listening right now. I would say that this is the... I liked everything except the moral of it. Just because someone looks different doesn't mean you can't share it.

What I'll say to to everyone, if you're worried that you just got spoiled on the whole plot and you don't want to see it, this is one of those movies where the spoilers, don't matter so much. It's more about the emotion. Exactly. Well, and the journey. The ride. You didn't like the moral. I didn't like the monsters. I didn't just make them all people. yeah that's a good point yeah i don't like it would have been a stronger moral if it was just about people who look different yeah yeah yeah they could still be named the grundles yeah sure i also thought that the whole movie didn't make too much sense to me logically because they're they claim that the opening scene is a botched scaring but it scared me yeah i think it would have scared that family i think

it was a successful scaring i think that kind of invalidates the whole point of the grundles and i'm starting to think that the grundles and the kids made the movie as a scare tactic yeah but that's the grundles let's look at the next movie we have this one is Subway the movie from 2025 this movie is listed as in development and it has no information available on it and here's the poster it's a picture of a train says Subway the movie

the train has an N95 mask on it and says the train is coming and now I think this must be another tagline at the bottom it says 2021 I think this movie was in development hell because Jonathan Majors was in it it's listed it's coming out in 2025 but it says

2021 in the poster so I was saying maybe this could be period piece. My review of this would be Michael Moore has done it again another scathing

parody and criticism of American culture the subway and then in parentheses the subway train is literally

wearing a mask yeah and has middle fingers on the window and he has middle fingers and they're Mickey's fingers saying fuck you

to the rest of the country this might be a remake I'm realizing a stealth reboot of train arriving at the station made a

100 years prior. Oh, true, because it's headed right to the... Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, luckily, I can't be fooled by that another, you know, 10 times. Uh-huh. So, uh, I'm not scared. Yeah. All right, next movie, please. Attack of the Bulge.

If the world fell into chaos, terrorism across the globe, then how would you defend your home? Attack of the Bulge, don't forget they're watching. Oh, I thought it said, don't forget they're matching. directed by Tyler's Soma Wang. How would I defend my home from a bulge? I don't know. I'd have to put myself out in the... I'd have to put myself out in the backyard.

Remember, real housewives came out on. Does you get a bulge? I get a bowl to my pants. I see the real housewives. The real... The real housewives, yeah, of all cities. Oh, okay. See, I was thinking that it was going to be

the bolt, like a bulge-headed your... headed to your house to get, and I would say that I would defend myself by walking out with my mouth open. Now, if we've seen the movie, which we have, you know that both of these scenarios are present. And this is what is so intoxicating about this movie is it attacks the bulge from every angle. Yes.

What does it really mean? The bulge is getting touched in from every single direction. Oh, yeah. Yeah. And I'm really surprised they were able to do this in a PG rating. Yes. Both the bulge, the bulge, the scenes of the guy playing with his bulge, first of all, and second of all, the scenes,

that detail the terrorist plot. Yes. An instructional didactic detail. Yes. Kind of an anarchist cookbook level of detail. And the part where it says, here's kind of fight club style, here's how to get a bulge.

Yes. Number one. Turn on the real housewives. Walk in when your girlfriend is watching the real housewives. And speaking of walk in, Joaquin, Phoenix. Another amazing turn. As the Joker.

Yeah. That's why he turned. This is the movie. This movie is the reason why he turned down that other movie he was supposed to. to be doing that Todd Phillips or... Yeah.

Is that his name? No. Todd, uh, uh, uh, Haynes? Yeah, Todd Haynes movie. He turned down that Todd Haynes movie. Speaking of Haynes, there's a bulge in his haines in this movie.

Yeah, and he went method for this, by the way. He walked around. He went to message. Yeah, with a bulge. He walked around with a bulge. And there's paparazzi photos of him bulging it up. Yeah. And people are saying, what's the bulge about?

What's the bulge about? Here comes the announcement for the movie. Oh. Attack of the bulge. He's done it again. Mm-hmm. All right, let's see the next one. The teen, 2025, a boy that is not happy with the way he sees himself in the world

and wants to end his life completely while suffering from severe mental health problems. What was amazing? This movie was funny. Yeah, this movie was so funny. What was so amazing about it is that they show the end of his life so graphic and detail. Yeah, that was a hilarious scene. It feels like a slapstick three stooges style scenario. Exactly.

When he keeps tying the rope and the rope keeps falling off the ceiling fan. Yeah. This is going to stick around. for a very long time. He ties the rope to the ceiling fan and he swings around the room. 10 out of 10. And everybody in my showing

clapped when the team passed away. Every single person was very, very sad. They stood up and cheered. Next movie. This is the Dark Dinosaur movie Darkness of the Multiverse in 2025. Back in December 5th,

20 to 11, Dark Dinosaur got grounded for the first time. Then he did a 1,000 grounded stuff for less than 13 years now. What will he do next? the poster here you can see Nicolodeon. You're grounded,

Dark Dinosauri Gratz grounded the movie. You can see it has Nickelodeon, 24. And it also says E1 at the bottom. But you can see the top cast here. This is a brilliant way to cast a movie. We have as Dark Dinosaur,

Rod, 6th pitch. As Gray Dinosaur, Rod, 9th pitch. And as Young Dark Dinosaur, Rod's second pitch. It's all Rod. It had different pitches. An amazing performance out of Rod. I mean,

range to be able to go from the clumps young dark dinosaur to dark dinosaur and then now you're gray dinosaur and I believed every last second of you know I thought is this a different actor no it's this is six-thetics were amazing the difference in the color of the dinosaurs really helped to differentiate them

and the grounding was scary yeah I did not like the grounding stuff I feel like you need that's like stuff where it's like okay I get what you're trying to get across here but I don't want this to be depicted I watch movies to escape there's excessive it reminded of real grounding. There's excessive grounding in movies.

Exactly. And it's like if you're going to depict a grounding, like I don't want it to be something where I'm supposed to revel in it. Yes. And the grounding. And I almost feel like creators are just shoving grounding scenes

into like everything now. Exactly. So it's so exploitative. Exactly. So I, and it's giving people an unrealistic expectation of grounding as well. Yeah. Which is, it sucks.

It's not going to be interesting like in a movie. You're not going to find a magic door under your bed. No, there's not. thing up there. You're not going to be a dark dinosaur. Being stuck in your room is a terrible faith for anybody. And this yellow dinosaur here,

I really, really loved what they did with his face. And the twist that it was actually a guy in disguise was not so unexpected. I really couldn't believe it. Yeah. Let's take a look at the next movie here.

So this is Coomwood Pan again. This is why I wasn't able to speak about some of the other words. This is... The embargo ended right now. Yeah. So that embargo was something I made up. So I didn't have to say anything.

I feel you. Which is most of the time when someone asked me a question, I don't want to answer. I say there's an embargo on that. I can't answer that right now. Mustard Fields, 2025. Peter Love Nature. He is funny guy and he likes summer.

Lisa make a plan to go mustard fields at Alton Hampshire. They went there. They found mustard bloom yellow flowers there. Mustard Field was beautiful. This is story about mustard field, directed and written by Kumwood Pant. What did you guys think about mustard fields? I thought that the chase scene,

This chase scene right here. The one with the helicopter or the one with the bumblebee? The one with the helicopter. The one featured in the poster? Yeah. I mean, you see it on the poster and you're like, there's no way they really went for it.

Yeah. But they go for it. North by Northwest. Yeah. For a low budget movie, the helicopter chasing scene was so realistic. I almost felt like they just filmed the real helicopter chase.

I threw up into my popcorn bag and the movie was so exciting. I felt the need to be chewing something, so I kept eating my popcorn. I threw up into my pocket and I was so embarrassed that I just kept it there the rest of the movie. I ripped my chair out of the movie theater floor.

And I put it in my car. I was terrified. I put it in my car as a driver's seat. And now I drive around in a movie chair. I took the pedals out of my car and I installed them on my movie theater seat and I drove around in circles during the last scene. It was so excited by the helicopter fly.

It was so amazing. I watched the movie in a helicopter and it felt so real. I thought I was chasing Mr. Pant himself. So we've had a lot of fun with Coomid Pant movies. But for my last thing, he had these two upcoming movies. And I thought, well, let's dip back into his back catalog. Yeah, because this is our only movie from the past. It's not all fun in games.

It's not all Virginia Water Lake. It's not all mustard fields. He has range. Let's take a look at this next movie, the last movie. Frimley Park Hospital, 2023. Yeah, I remember this one. When Ronnie came back, UK from Holiday, she noticed his brother, Tom's eyes, body yellow. He lost 15 kilograms within month.

Tom admitted Frimley Park Hospital. doctor confirmed him he has John Dish autoimmune gallstone ulcer his life is getting short directed and written by Kumud Pan

this was I haven't seen this one this reminded me so much of beginners have you seen that movie no I have not seen the beginnings of some movies it reminded me of the beginning

of a lot of movies contagion comes to mind up the beginning of yeah up that's another one where you just feel it's like I don't know how to describe it it's almost like you do need a level of maturity

to really enjoy this because the topics that it's tackling are so... So it feels like you're being torn apart. It feels like people who haven't gone through trauma we actually get this movie. Especially people who have not had family members. Like if your family, if nobody in your family has had body yellow or jaundish or had their life get short,

then you're not gonna, like you probably will enjoy it because it's well crafted. You can like put yourself in the shoes of like anybody, Ronnie Tom Doctor Have you Have you looked up Kumud Pant on YouTube

No I was gonna save it I feel like there's I feel like there's probably A bunch of stuff on there right I just looked him up And uh Because I was trying to find This movie

These are Far from just his only IMDB Okay I'm really excited To see Kumut Pant Well you haven't already seen him Yeah we're reviewing his movie I haven't seen this one

I've seen the other two I'm excited to see More of his movies You probably would not get that much out of this movie I would say I don't know what John Dish is. Because you've never had any trauma in your life. You don't even know what John Dishes.

This is the most realistic. This is a movie for people who are scarred. End of life movie I've ever seen. Yeah. Of somebody dying of John Dish. See, I don't know. See, like me and Caleb who were raised kind of in the streets with trouble.

Every single family member I ever had. Yeah. You were born with a silver spoon in your mouth. Yeah. I was born with a poop in my mouth. Didn't let me one. Yeah. Three bunk beds.

Yeah. One for each bed. This is a movie for people who don't even know what a bunk bed is. That's right. They can't imagine even one bed, Gall stone, ulcer, autoimmune. The only stones that I had growing up were diamonds. Yeah, see, I bet that's true because of how rich you were.

Yeah. See, but we had gallstone. We, my mom's engagement ring. My mom's engagement ring was a gallstone. That you also played with. And it was mine. My birth stone was a gallstone. Exactly. I was born at a very odd time.

And a strange month. I was born in a strange month. My birth stone is a gallstone. And I have jaundice. Body yellow. But that's the last. one. Okay.

So I would say the... 20 out of 10. Yeah. To finish this off... 20 out of 23 or 23. 23 out of 20. 23 out of 20 Michael Jordan and LeBron James.

Yeah. And 20. 20. 24 out of 23. 1 Kobe Bryant out of a LeBron James, Michael Jordan. This is an amazing movie. Run, don't walk to go see mud pants. Or,

or whatever is it. Go see Mr. K. Mudpants. new flicks whenever and wherever they are sold. Thank you so much for making movies, Mr. Pant. Yeah. You're a brilliant mind.

And thank you so much for listening and watching at home. Without you, without viewers like you, we would be nothing. This has been The Critics Hour. I'm Caleb Pitt signing off. I'm Patrick Doran. And what are you doing? I'm sitting. I'm signing off. You're signing off.

You say the same thing. I'm Patrick Doran. No. You don't say you're Patrick Doran. You say I'm Patrick Doran. I'm Patrick. I'm Cameron. No, of course.

Of course. Of course. Of course I'm Patrick Doran. No, you say Cameron. You're Cameron Fetter. Pits. I'm Cameron. You say I'm Frank.

Of course I'm Frank. Frankenstein. Yeah, wait. Yeah, say I'm Frankenstein. Oh, he's Frankenstein. Oh, he's Frankenstein. We got your bitch ass. they have so much texture

they're like topographical shirts and pants that they were. I got I got rid of some shirts Mm-hmm Affliction? Not affliction shirts, but they're like, um, I got like Metal militia. I got, I had like a shirt that my friend gave me

Okay. Um, and like I bought the shirt. No, no, no. It was a shirt that my friend gave me and it was a shirt that he made and I washed it one time and then the print like, I think like the print got like super fucked up and there was just like ink all over it. And I was like, oh, I can't wear this anymore. And my neighbor, he's like a big burly,

like older Polish guy. Okay. I put it out in like in a bag on the street because I was like, you know, like somebody will take this. My neighbor's been wearing it. That's awkward. I see him wearing it all the time. That's really awkward. Yeah. Does it fit him well? Yeah. Does he look better in it than you did? He looks better in it than I did. But it's a completely ruined shirt. It's a ruined shirt. But he thinks it's a style. I don't think he knows what it says. Really? Yeah.

What does it say? You didn't even tell me? No, I didn't tell you. It's this shirt. What does it say? This shirt this guy sent me that says it's supposed to be like, kiss me. I'm Irish. It says kiss me.

I'm white and violent. This guy is flying around. In a shirt that says, kiss me, I'm white and violent. and he has no idea what it says. Yeah.