Podcast About List - Ep. 312 - We Want To Join The Murderer Community

Episode Date: October 23, 2024

In this week's spooky episode we explore one of the scariest communities online: the murderer community. We learn what makes the common murderer tick, what they like to eat and if they even gaf that they're evil asf. Subscribe to us on YouTube youtube.com/@PodcastAboutList Buy tickets to our latest live show https://www.swagpoop.com/shows Get extra premium and Gun City RPG episodes at https://www.patreon.com/podcastaboutlist Follow us https://www.swagpoop.com/links

See, I don't know how this just happened. It's the ghost of Jack White. Must be the ghost of Jack White. I was trying to... You're the breaker. You put this on, obviously a Jack White costume. You've been getting prettyed up. You put on the bow tie and it falls off.

So now you're shy Jack White and not... What's the name, Billy? You want to play the guitar. Oh, okay. What is the whole thing My wife asked me this... What the fuck is... What the fuck happened?

How did it break more? I was supposed to be the Billy the puppet. Dude, now you're Jack White with a red pocket square. There we go. Now that's pretty. That's good. My wife asked me the other day, did they...

Did people just assume that they were married or that they were brother and sister? Or did they say were brother and sister? They said their brother and sister. Really? Yeah, to fuck with people. And is that, do you think that would fly these days? Yeah.

I wish we had that shit, man. Well, who's somebody that could do this? The Jonas brothers? If the Jonas brothers said, we're married. Yeah. Would that be kind of crazy if they just said out of nowhere? That's because we already know, though. And also they started when they were married men.

They were like, started when they were 13. Yeah. And they were like, yeah. Started marrying each other? No, that's what I mean. If they came out on the scene and they were like, yeah, we're four married guys that look alike. Yeah. There's four of them?

I thought there was three. No, there's three and then the bonus Jonas. There's the bonus Jonas. Franklin. Franklin, the bonus Jonas. That's not true. He's homies with Patrick, swear to God.

He is. They chill. I met him once. He's friends with Brandon. The admittance. The admittary of what you're doing. He's friends with Brandon Wardell. I met him.

That guy? Yeah. Is that really what he looks like? He looks like a Jonas. I wouldn't call that bonus. He was born. There's three and then there's another one. That's a bonus.

Like a donut in a baker's dozen. bonus. But nobody who's a fan of, when you get a bonus donut, you go, yes, my bonus donut. I think I'd, I think I'd rather have a bonus donut. No offense. You don't give a fuck about this guy. No, I think they did. Jonas Brothers fans liked him. But he doesn't make music, does he? Yeah, he does. But you're right there, Franklin Jonas Chair. You'd just be excited just to know that there's another one coming down the pipeline. Yeah, I guess so. I guess it doesn't matter if he makes music or not. You're just excited about another guy. No, people don't like the Jonas Brothers for their music.

They like them for their brotherhood. Yeah. And their bodies. If they were the Jonas friends, nobody would give a fuck. That's true.

Nobody would ever listen to them. If they were a married, but if I mean, I would say they all be the, they're the Jonas friends, how do they all have the same? They literally would not be famous. Because they're such good friends.

The Ramones was that. They all had the same name. They were the Ramones' friends. Yeah. None of them were named Ramon. Yeah. Were any of them brothers? No.

Maybe Marky and Deity. I think there was. There's two of them that were brothers. I think Marky and Dedy were... That's one of the most classic things for a band is to have two guys who are brothers. I feel like you can't start a band without two brothers. Devo was four brothers.

Basically every band. A lot of band. Devo was four brothers and a brother and two of them were brothers. And I have brothers. And I'm sure you can relate to this. I've never looked at my brothers and said, let's do... Let's make something together.

No, we tried to start a band. Me and my brothers tried to start a band multiple times. Yeah, we tried to start bands multiple times and never worked because of creative differences. Well, tell me about the names. That's what I'm... really interested in um god i don't remember any of the names i remember it was me my brother paul and then my cousin and two brothers and a cousin and two brothers and a cousin and they said that i should be

the bass player that's always means that you have the least talent yeah if you get stuck with that in a kid's band yeah because i got asked to be the bass player i was like i don't know how to play bass i can't play piano in evil sunrise our new band this is a rock band so i didn't play sunrise yeah It was always shit like that. It was all something either evil or dark. My cousin tried to name it after the neighborhood we were from. That's cool. That's badass.

But our neighborhood, our neighborhood was called, it was a condominium complex called Old Country Village Road. That's a sick name for a band. And he tried to, we used to call it OCV. Whoa. And he tried to call it OCV, the band. I see. Mm-hmm. Cool.

I'm going to stop giving out old addresses on here. Why? Someone said that that's, you know, you can look at people's tax records and stuff from that. Who gives a, oh, my tax records, wow. Yeah, but then you can get like, yeah, it's like, oh, pay it. You can get your information stolen through that. What information do you have to be stolen? Yeah, if someone tried to steal any of my, like, if they tried to steal my identity,

it's like, what are you going to get with a 400 credit score? You're a vagrant. You are literally a vagrant hobo. Oh, oh, I'm going to pay for, I'm going to pay for, they're going to go into a hospital and trying to use my ID and it's like you owe $50,000 because you had a stomach ache and you came in here when you bet.

That's why people usually steal identities. Yeah. I'm a stomachache. Go to the hospital for a stomachache. Well, they go to the hospital, find out my hypochondriac ass has been there. You were already there with her a stomachache. Yeah, I was there because I had a stomach ache.

They were there trying to steal stuff to get by, use your card on the vending machine. Yeah. And they said, this vending machine is only for people who are paid up. You cannot come in here. here because you already owe so much to this company. You should be able to start a tab at the hospital.

You do. You do, yeah. Oh, well, I am really smart then. You should be able to, but can you say put it on my tab specifically? You can't. That's all they can do. I think I did that at a dentist one time. I don't think, I think you have to wait for them to bill you.

I don't think you can just pay in cash at the hospital. I don't think you just walk in and, yeah. God, this health care system in this country is so fucking busted. Dude, don't even get me started, man. Hey, healthcare providers. You know, in Britain, if you want to be euthanized, you can go and they will kill you for no reason. Yeah, that's good. For no reason?

I think that's good. In America, we had, what's his name, Kavorkian. This guy got, what is it called? Convicted. He got killed. I actually don't know what happened to him. And I don't really know that whole case. I just know that that is a scary name.

Yeah. To be convicted of murder and have your name be Kovorkian. It's cool. Really scary. Yeah, that is a scary name. That's a Halloweenish name. yeah but not a really good costume if you just dress up as a bald guy in a suit yeah what do you look like did he have a scar in his eye that's what i imagine him having his fangs and a knife for a hand

but he just look up uh dr cavorkian was he was he was he the evil doctor who all who was a painter as well did he do paintings he wasn't that's the thing he wasn't evil he was evil he was just a he was just a normal democrat doctor he's evil that's what i'm saying he's not doesn't look well he looks a little evil he looks so evil no he doesn't he doesn't Look at him. Look at his smiles. Jack Kavorkian, that is scary. That's a grim reaper face.

No, man. It literally is. Look, Dr. Death. He's just a guy. He was like the first guy that... He was euthanizing people. Yeah, but with their consent? Yes, that's usually what euthanasia means.

And then he... Well, euthanasia on a dog is not consensual. I don't think a dog is like... That literally... That was a full logic bomb you just dropped on me. I'm not going to lie. I just got destroyed. You did.

Yeah. I mean, I mean, And also, I think the whole thing is that he got in trouble. So it wouldn't be so crazy if it wasn't consensual. Yeah, but did he get in trouble in the court of public opinion? It's in trouble because it's illegal to euthanize the United States. And he doesn't know anything about it. It's a reason.

Yeah. And they convicted him of murder. Because I have no, I knew that he's like doctor death. I knew about that. But I knew it was, is it like he wanted to give people medically assisted suicide. And everyone was like, you're a monster. And it's like, well, they want it. That's, I feel like, yeah, I don't know.

I feel like if someone's like, please kill me. am of sound mind please kill me and then you kill them i think that's no skin off your back it sucks it's weird for sure but i think that like i honestly think that's between two adults in their own hospital i think you're completely right though that with the dog thing i think it's honestly sadder to do that to a dog yeah because if a person can go like yeah fuck it put me put slime in me yeah it's sad when a dog hurts every day exactly it's way sad my back hurts every single day i I can't go to the hospital. I can't walk anymore.

I liked walking. I can't live without walking. I think probably a lot of people's concern with euthanasia is that the doctor will be kind of an evil type of guy who would go and write down. He said that he was, he wanted me to do. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

And then they say, and then they say, well, how do we know? And you go, you can't ask him. He's dead. Now with Instagram live and everything. He wanted to euthanize people. If that was kind of the sick way you got your thrills. So I'm thinking of wearing a box. body camera 24-7 like a police officer yeah exactly you could just go live on your body

cam and be like look I want to die this doctor gonna do it for me now let's live stream this shit let's watch it yeah thank you for the roses just falling asleep let's live stream this shit let's live stream this shit thank you for the 500 bits being yourself in the hospice bed yeah man I think that I think they do it right in Norway or one of these there was one that I read about

in a book I was just reading one euthanasia case where the woman it was an old woman and she had some type of affliction that was so terrible and causing her immense pain and she was like please don't try and do these procedures on me

I would just rather die because I'm in such huge pain I don't want to live anymore and the doctor said well I took the Hippocratic oath. That fucking oath. And I feel obligated. It's part of the like hospital

or whatever policy that I must do everything I can to save your life. And he basically extended her life by like a couple years and she just lived in unimaginable pain. Oh my God. Sounds like a really good book.

Yeah. Yeah, it's really actually kind of an interesting book. Yeah, maybe for a sick fuck like you. This is kind of the other side of the coin. Hey, we replaced all your lungs with this machine. Well, just, yeah.

Hit a bunch of M&Ms. He basically turned you into half computer. Well, they just made it kept her alive. It's fucked up. You get to be alive. People should be able to just die if you want to. Yeah. It's crazy.

And he's like, well, now you're here. I got to go into your body and change everything around and make it work. Yeah. Except I did just realize that I think Jack of Orkian was pardoned. He was pardoned? I think he was pardoned by a democratic president. Yeah. Can you tell us what he did?

Yeah. No. Or you don't know either. I know that he was convicted. of murder and because of being a euthanasia expert and then something but it was some kind of political thing where it was like

Republicans were like life is so awesome but also here's why Republicans are pro-life because their lives are awesome as fuck yeah they have all the money well no that's a stereotype thank you very much what that Republicans have all the money? They're just happier

because they're Christian and they have 100 well the Christians control I mean oh no Every single aborted baby, Republicans think that baby could be out on the field in the NFL. Yeah, they think that baby could be the next Hitler. That's what they want. Don't, what is up with you being so, so, what's wrong with you, man?

That's somebody's argument to be pro-like. It could be the next hitler. And you could stop it. And I could stop it. I could be a hero. But no, the Republican, everybody, everybody, you don't want abortion because it's like, well, you could be on a speed. boat. You could be doing this. And Democrats say, oh, what are they going to do? Listen to music. Mm-hmm. Just let them die. Yeah. And so that's basically what the Kovorkian argument was.

I guess that's my most, I guess that's my most lefty, loony lib thing. Yeah, you are. Is that you're excited for the next Hitler? No. Yeah, that's what I heard. Because I'm not, I'm pro choice on this matter. Pro choosing to be Hitler. Pro choosing to be assistedly. Okay. But I'm not, that's your most leftist. But I'm not pro choice on abortion. But, Respect. No, no. I think anyone can kill themselves. My hand smells like my

Stein. Your Stein had? Yeah, my hand smells Handenstein. Oh, that sounds like latex, man. It's terrible. What were you fingering earlier? My Stein, bro.

You were fingering his head. You were fingering your real doll. My fucking Stein. Was Stein born with a wee? He was born with a wee. Did they give him a wee? Did he give him a wee? He, I mean, obviously he had a wee.

But did they? and a son of Frankenstein did the bride son is the son of the doctor not of the monster fuck me really my fucking stupid is that true

yeah well I'm the son of Frankenstein let him call it bride of Frankenstein's monster yeah oh yeah I just remembered

son of Frankenstein is the what's his name the joke one yeah I just remember it's Mel Brooks Gene Wilder

yeah no it's not yeah it's a young Frankenstein oh yeah son of Frankenstein is the old

universal one. Well, I'm going to kill myself. What is the point of a son of Frankenstein movie? Because who gives a fuck about the son of a guy? I'll tell you what it is. It's that at the end of, it's that Dr. Frankenstein is not around to make any more monsters.

And they say, how do we make 50 more of these movies? Well, maybe what if every movie we found a different one of his sons? So this is basically what most of them are. Before the concept of a reboot. Yeah, this is back in the 30s kind of vibe.

They fucking sucked at movies back. I was sick of all. Have you tried watching? one of these old movies. Yeah. They're ass. They're all square. What old movie did I watch?

I'm trying to remember. I watched one recently. I watched that movie Haxon. What's that? Oh, 19, 18 movie about witches. Yeah. The one, it's like really fast.

It's like the people doing this. Instructional. I was like maybe that might be scary to me if it was in the background of a actual scary movie and was on a TV. It's actually a documentary. It's not scary. It's not a documentary. It's not.

They have, like, people dressed up like witches and giant backdrops and shit. That's what it ended up in dog. People are boiling crap. Yeah, they have a big cauldron. Naked demons and stuff. Yeah, the demons are not real. Yeah. Yeah, exactly.

So it's not a dog. It's educational. I do really like the, I do really like Nospharatu, though. That thing is. You know, they're doing it. That shit isn't out yet, bro. Yeah, they haven't. That hasn't dropped yet.

They can't speak at all in that, but even with no speaking. They can't speak. They can't speak in it, but it's still good. that's you know that we're at the bottom of the barrel when we're going back to Nosferatu yeah that's pretty crazy they do that every every decade you go 100 years back

every decade there's been an Osferatu remake is that true I think so that's the only one I never heard of there's it was the 20s when it came out right then next decade they made Dracula yeah then the year

that's not Norsevaratu though it is Nosephratu but I'm talking about the big hand yeah well that's because it's the story of Dracula but to Yeah. To avoid getting... Bram Stoker wouldn't give the rights.

And then they made it with a different vampire guy, but it's the same story as Dracula. And then Bram Stoker's wife bought up and destroyed all the copies of Nosephratu. Except for one. Yeah, she just, like, missed a few, and that's why I still have it. Really? Yeah. I didn't know that.

She was very litigious on behalf of her husband because Bram Stoker was not a popular or good author, and he just kind of randomly struck gold with Dracula. So they were really trying to hold on to it. of his other books were like I don't even know the names my name is Bram my life has Bram it's him sitting next to the B

where's his leg kicked up where's Bram Stoker from England I would assume yeah that's really his fucking name there's another Bram Stoker book it's a horror book that's called The Italians are moving in that's what Dracula was about already

can you look up Bram Stoker books I want to see the name of his books yeah he should have written a book called My name is Bram My name is Bram My name is Bram Oh he's Irish

Oh I guess that makes sense Dracula's guest The mystery of the sea The judge's house The layer of the white worm Oh they made that one into a movie Yeah is that good I don't know I never seen it

Dracula number one The Squaw The Squaw Powers of Darkness Dracula's guest Why did this guy's career never take off The Man Bram Stoker's the man

Well, that's my name is Bram. Yeah. Is the man. Well, I think maybe that's a prequel to Dracula. Dracula Penguin. Dracula Penguin. The Primrose Path. Manga Classics, Dracula.

Yeah, you can't trust Google to find this shit because it's like, you know, they're going to throw that stuff in there. He made a lot of interesting comic books, Mr. Brown Stoker. Did he fully invented Dracula, right? Yeah. Well, actually. Don't talk to me about this. Ivan the crazy guy. Yeah, Vlad, Dracula.

But also there are other, other older vampire books from before that. So it was considered a thing. Varney the vampire. He was the first vampire. He was just the vampire goat. He was the one who kind of, yeah, who was the, he brought it into the public eye. I mean, coolest name, possible. He blew everyone's minds.

Yeah. Yeah. It was kind of like the avatar. Yeah. James Cameron's avatar of the 1910s. Is you think that this is how, 18, what was that 18, I don't know. Is this how James. James Cameron's going to be remembered is a guy who made one good thing.

Bram Stoker style. No, no, no. No, because he made Terminator. He made everything. He made everything. Titanic. Yeah. Stupid. That must suck being a...

What the fuck is wrong with you? Shut up, bro. You're also writing, like, vampire stuff. You're also doing vampire stuff, and then Bram Stoker comes along. Yeah. And he's made, like, the number. I think I'll write a book called Dracula. Wait, I like that, too.

I just finished writing the man. Go ahead, Bram. What about a guy that gets banned? Yeah, whatever, Bram. So Varney went to the blood world. He's being dismissed by all the other vampire writers. I'm glad Dracula caught on instead of Varney. Barney.

Well, think about the repercussions of that. No, Barney. Yeah. There's a female vampire, Carmilla, or something like along those lines. Oh, that was my stepmom's name. Lesbian vampire. If we were stuck with Varney, she was a vampire. If we were stuck with Varney, you don't get a blackula.

Yeah. No, it's harder. There's no... But then that's Barney. His name would be Barney. Blarney would be an Irish. Yeah. An Irish fan, which would also be pretty scary.

That would be scary. I want to drink your whiskey. So... Let me let me think about this one for a second. I want to drink your whiskey. So he still has the accent. Yeah. Even though he's Irish.

Well, Irish people... It's a Dracula accent. You know where the accent. I can drop all my Dracula trivia. Okay, go ahead. The accent was from... Blood World. Who was it?

No, it was somebody who was doing, who, it was some comedian who was doing a routine of Dracula. And said, I vaunt to suck your blood. Yeah, yeah. And that like, the, like... Really? Yeah, that accent is from now. Yeah, because they didn't have talking in the movies. Well, they did, didn't that one, but he's...

No, there's specific, there's some specific person who did it and, like, changed. He changed the impression game. You know what I'm saying? I see. Who was it? I don't know. Henny Youngman? I don't think it was Henny Youngman.

Red Skelton? I don't think it was Red Skelton. Red Skelton would be an insane one. He invented the Dracula accident. What was Albert Brooks' dad's name? He was like, this is not going to work. You can list as many as you want,

but I'm not going to remember who it was. The funny thing about vampires is that some part of me thinks that that's possible. Yeah. Of all of the monsters that exist in fiction. All you have to do is, have a sharp teeth and drink.

Yeah. Anyone can do that. Anybody can drink and have sharp teeth. Look at everyone's teeth. You get two of Dracula-style teeth already built into your body. Mm-hmm. You're 30 away. And think about this.

Canines sounds more like the wolf man. So it's almost like we're Halloween-type. That's true as fuck. It's almost like all sides of Halloween are represented in the mouth. It's not like blood has no nutritional value. No, blood sausage. You could probably live on blood. Blood worms.

People drink blood all the time. Yeah. People eat blood oranges. Blood oranges. Those don't have blood in them, guys. That is just a kind of. kind of orange that has a different color. What does he think the color comes from?

The orange is blood. No. They bury the tree under a guy. They bury the tree on a guy. What the fuck does that mean? They bury the seed into a person like Mad Max Friosa. That was cool when they did that rose. Fioriosa.

I didn't see this movie. They put a seed in a guy's butt. They put a seed in a man's butt. I've seen that movie. They have a big final battle and then it just cuts to someone putting a seed. butt and then cuts to credits. It's disgusting. You'd think it's disgusting, but in the context of the movie,

it's actually really moving. You know nothing of artistic integrity, man. I just wish that they didn't get rid of what's her name and put what's her name in there. Who, Anya Taylor Joy. I think it, I think she's good. She's really good in it. She's too, though.

Skinny. Yeah, I guess. They should have fed her before. Charlie's their own. They should have fed Anya Taylorne. Taylor Joy before they put her in this movie. I do not like how skinny she is and I refuse to watch a movie with her.

Okay. Although I did watch Bloody Chef or whatever it's called. The menu? That's you right now. Bro, you're the bloody chef. I am the bloody chef. Look at you. You didn't see the menu?

It's complete crap. Yeah, it doesn't seem too interesting to me. It's one of the worst movies. I can't. Like Zamo is in it. And it was by the makers of succession is what I heard. Really? Yeah.

Well, that was a failure. I don't know. I did it. It was complete crap. Oh, there he is, Ray Fines. The Menus Cheeseburger Explained. This sounds like the best fucking movie of all time. No, it really was complete poop.

It really sucked. The menus cheeseburger. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, I haven't seen the movie at all, but I've seen the Babbage. I know that's a cheeseburger. The menus cheeseburger explained. Yeah. The menus cheeseburger explained.

You don't need to see the movie to see the cheeseburger. That's making me really hungry. I'm not going to like thinking about a cheeseburger. being explained right now from the menu the whole so god have you that's what i said when i asked a menu yeah i asked the waiter a second piece of paper could i get yeah the menu's cheeseburger explained could you explain this cheeseburger on the menu for me yeah so it's bottom bun that's the base yeah baseline bottom burger is well that's the meat burger well that's the protein of the whole burger and let's see what else they have on here oh it looks to me like it's a

triple stack it's a double cheeseburger hold the lettuce don't beat front and sun no seats on the phone. What happened to that guy? I don't know. Those guys had that one video and then nothing else, I think. That's so sad. The Big Mac rap. Imagine writing something so.

So generational. So they're probably, they are the chubby checker of YouTube. So when you do something like that, you don't need to stick around. Yeah. I don't think that they're the chubby checker. Do you just have a job then and you just say, people say, what do you do? And say, well, now I work at, uh, H&R block, but I used to make the

McDonald's. I used to make that one time. I used to make the Big Mac Wrap. That's what happens to the little kid from little rascals. Which one? Spanky. The boy who plays Spanky, he just worked at a Walmart in Texas. It's so sad

when somebody is an actor for their whole life. That Pugsley, Little Pugsley, from Adam's Family and Adam's Family Values, that iteration of Pugsley. I see. He quit. I know Pugley. He quit. But I'm just saying that specific actor. He quit acting after he was a child actor as Pugsley.

And now he is a driver for movies. He drives people around. I was looking at his IMDB. It's pretty cool. All his credits are all his credits are stopped in the 90s. And then all of his credits are driver after that. One address to the next address. But instead he retired as an actor.

So now he drives. Probably got a million dollars in the stock market. And he looks fucking badass. Yeah. Behind the wheel. He still look like Pugsley. He looks like Pugsley He looks like Pugsley

Stylish Pugsley I'll say I'll say that I'll say that That is so Hollywood That even your driver is an actor Even your driver's Pugsley Even your driver is fucking Pugsley Have you seen

That's so Halloween too That's so Halloween Speaking of the little rascals That dude who played alfalfa Bug Hall Do you see this a couple weeks ago? That can't be the name His name was Bug Hall

Look it up He was also in that spy movie With Lindsay Lohan He was the only one that had a career breaking friday isn't a spy movie it is a spy movie i guess you're a spying on your mom by switching bodies with her bug hall bug hall got a bug in his damn brain went full tilt conservative and now is uh he's he's a red pill guy what is up with you and your anti anti right wing look at this bug rigid is the wood of the cross self-canceled emmy nominee patriot rascal i like rascal there at the

end that's cute yeah that's adorable i have an air mark a thanacius chat Anthony Hall Barnett of the Gold Cross. Yeah, so he has like five daughters. And now that he has a son, he has an heir. He's like, oh, I have an error. Athanasia's contramundum. That's abusive to name your damn kid that. Mark?

Yeah, true as fuck. Yeah, if you're going to go crazy on it, you might as well do it in the middle name. Yeah, it's fine. It's fine to do that. Yeah, the middle name can be crazy. You can hide the middle name. Basically, Mark Anthony.

Your name of your kids, Mark Hall? Bug Jr. Yeah, I would have named Mike. You name your damn kid, Oh, he's a fuck, he thinks he's so cool in Red Pilt.

He's fucking hyphenating his kid's last name. True as fuck. He's whipped, bro. Also, your name, you name your kid Mark Athanasius,

Anthony, Chad Hall, Barnett, and your name is Bug. Yeah. That's crazy. Straight up, should have been Bug Jr.

My name is Athanasius, and this is my dad, bug. Your name is Bug. You cannot name your kid like a knight. Yeah. It's not right.

Also, he looks like, a damn bug. Pretty much any kid looks like a bug until they're older. I do not like how white babies look. I really don't, man. Every time that I have a niece or a nephew born

and they send me a picture of them it grosses me out. Yeah, both of my nephews were premature and my nephew, he looked weird for like a long time. When did it stop? And he turned one. He turned one and he looked normal to you.

He looks normal instantly, yeah. but he looked like a damn there's photos of him where he looks like a fucking alien yeah I don't think that babies are meant to be red like that when they're born no

no it's not right they're supposed to be chubby and when they're premature they come out too damn small it's like what do you do

why is it you can't be that big and what we put them in a fucking cage to move to see air fry that is exactly what it is you cook the baby more

and a fucking, you microwave the baby for like two more weeks. And then you got to, you know what I will say? I've always wanted to use, especially watching houses I've been doing, I've always wanted to put my hands into a cube and touch something. Oh, yeah, when they do with the,

to work with diseases and stuff. Yes, that looks amazing. I'd be in there doing this. You know what? You never see? What are you doing? There's me touching all the virus stuff. You know what? You never see in one of these doctor shows or something.

You never see somebody put their arms in the thing and like get ready and then just flip them off with a double finger. That would be badass. That's what House should be doing. Tell me about girls, man. I've completely forgot to talk about this.

I've been watching the show HBO's girls. Uh-huh. And so who are you? I don't remember. I remember Alex did the... You don't remember? No, oh my God. I don't remember Alex.

You literally, as you watch girls, every single scene, you should be switching between... Can I say Alex decided for me when we live together? You're season one, Jessa. See, I don't remember of Alex

season one my roommate Alex Forrest I don't remember if he said that I was Jessa I think I said

that in a card right before You are not Shosh I don't remember what Alex said You're not fucking Who was it

The show Who Okay I remember Joe's ass was Marnie You were not Shoshana

Joe's Marnie for show Joe's definitely Marnie Joe's a Marnie Joe's a Marnie Adam Driver No Okay

Whatever Laird I'll take Laird I'll take Laird all day I'll take Larry. I'm only in season two.

Laird, Elijah. Elijah. You are not Elijah. Hannah-Hovarth. You don't get to be, nobody gets to be Hannah. He's Hannah-Hovarth. Horvath.

Horvath. Hovath. You call me Laird. Pay better attention to this show. You are Jeff now. You are Jeff to me. Which one who's Jeff? The babysitter, dad.

Oh, that Jess. Wait, and you're Jessa? Wait, the babysitter. Oh, the babysitter. Wait a second. You're saying that you're saying that you're. You're Jess and he's... I'm only on season two, so don't spoil anything.

Nothing's being spoiled. Nothing's spoiled. We're talking about the choice that you made. Who's Julio Shoshana for sure? I'll give Hulio Shosh. It's fine by me. I'm not sure he's seen the show. Shosh.

No, I haven't. Okay. Well, you are Shosh. It's on the Plex. You need to watch girls, man. Yeah. Now you've got to get into it. Yeah.

I have been feeling like that is a roadblock for our friendship for years is that you hadn't seen this show. I was so vehemently opposed to... I think everybody who's a guy believes that they won't like the show because it's called girls. It's a red herring though. Yeah. It's the best show ever made. The boys on the show are cool as fuck. The boys are literally the main characters, if you ask me. The girls, nobody gives a fuck about the girl. I literally sleep through the girl scenes. But Charlie, though. Charlie goaded. I don't know too much about him yet. I'm only on season two. I've just started season three. He'll get to know a lot about Charlie. Oh, yeah.

I just got to the singing episode. Yep, that's a good episode, man. And then he just got back together with Marnie. No, Charlie! She's a fucking bitch. Don't you fucking realize it? Charlie, you bastard. You fucking idiot.

Have you got to the one where... You created forbid to get away from her, you idiot. Did you get to the one where Marty has a music video yet? Don't spoil anything, man. I couldn't remember when that was. God damn it, Cameron. She has a music video, though. That's I'm looking forward to it now.

Oh, now I'm in anticipation. I'm fucking anticipating. I can't wait for it. I don't remember anything that happens at what point and what point. It is cringe, man. She's cringed. So let me get you up to speed on the first two seasons. Okay, girls, we watch podcast go.

If you haven't seen it yet, fast forward. Okay, we'll put a timestamp to when I stop talking about it right here. Okay, so first episode, what happens? So that's the introduction. So you learn who everyone is. second episode so Hannah first episode

Hannah drinks the she gets cut off from her parents she drinks the opium tea that Ray makes Ray

Ray what a flawed character he is Ray he reminds me of Gregory House he's kind of a sardonic ass yeah bit of a dickhead

bit of a dickhead he's always right he's always right and he's got it's clear that Ray has a heart of gold unless something happens in the later seasons

that I don't know He remains in the goal. You're really hung up on something happening that changes everything in this show. Like a meteor's going to hit or something. Yes, a meteor hits.

Something does happen. What can possibly happen, man? I think something happens. The world gets destroyed and it turns into a post-apocalypse show. Adam does something not cool? Adam makes Natalia crawl on the floor. Okay.

That's where I got, okay, so I just got to that. Yeah, okay. And that's beat, by the way, Adam, Driver. That's beat. That's effed. Yeah.

She likes normal sex. Not this you're a dog type stuff. Yep. That's what I like Adam driver. That you're doing to Hannah. Make me do that. Not Natalia. Natalia is a damn normie.

Yeah, she's a normie. The part when Adam gets hit by the car, the car. And then they're riding in the season one finale. Yep, they're riding in the taxi and she got her bike and she's smiling. You're mixing up. That's the episode. That's the crack incident episode. where I watched it last night.

Right, okay. Oh, yeah, this is the, the Bushwick episode. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, okay, so here's another thing that I'm doing. I'm the, maybe the ultimate girl's head now. No, you're not. No, because, listen, because I watched season one up until season two, right? And then I told my girlfriend, you got to start watching this show.

It's so good. Now I'm rewatching from episode one again. So now I'm going to watch season one and two within this. Okay, so you're kind of like the ultimate head of season one and two, maybe. I may, I didn't know about the meteor. You haven't even gotten to the bad seasons where the meteor happens. I don't, I don't know why they did the meteor thing. There's the whole thing where they're rationing the food and then there's that moment where they actually lock Hannah in the pantry because she's losing her mind and then she eats every single piece of food that they have.

She has OCD. Well, because she's fat. And then there's this huge problem. She has OCD. She's putting beans at her ear. Oil consumption disease. That is, that's good. man you just made up for whatever stupid shit you said earlier what shit i want to drink your

whiskey remember that yeah that was shit yeah it was bad but so you like girls it's so good man it's the best show basically the best show ever written i think i agree i think uh god what else gets pretty bad though i'm gonna be honest it's bad it does get pretty last two yeah five and six three well last two seasons like i mean it's not even like it's not It's still fun to watch. That's when Trump was in office. No. I know it ended in 2017.

I don't think Trump being in office has much to do with... No, Alina Dunham is just so... She didn't sense... It's just not a good ending. It doesn't wrap up, well. And also just every character becomes just like... It's the same thing with every show

where if you do it long enough, everybody just becomes crazy. Yeah. You know, they just become not the original thing. Wow. You know? What? It was Broad City. that censored Trump's name.

Thank you so much, Alana Glazer, and the other one for that. Abby Jacobson. Thank you for Abby Jacobson. Thank you. For two Abby Jacobs for censoring as a two. Alana, congratulations on coming out. Thank you for coming out.

With a terrible show. Damn. Come on now. Damn. Chill on her. Chill on them. Chill on they. She they.

Stop with that. Stop tickling Jack White hair. Can you imagine? If you were a reporter and you did that, Jack White? I'm not a reporter. Well, but can you imagine a world where he's Jack White and you're a reporter and you tussle his hair and he slaps you? I could never be a reporter. Yeah, you're right.

You know why? Because I don't tell the truth. Because you're a liar. Because you're a crazy liar and nobody would trust you. Actually, it seems like I'd fit pretty well in with the reporters of nowadays. Yeah. You actually, you should not. You definitely shouldn't be a reporter.

You should be a satirist. Jesus. I think you would be an amazing full-time satirist I wish but the jobs just aren't there nowadays I've been trying to go like freelance a little bit satire industry satire's dead because the truth is stranger than fiction now it's true man I remember you used to see the old

onion headlines about the flying squirrel that says it's awesome every time and you say well that's so crazy but now I wake up in every single headlines like that yeah yeah what's your favorite onion article My favorite onion article Probably Worst guy

He made a great point Worst guy made a great point Worst guy who made it 9-11 here You are not going to believe What parent company click hole is a part of Come off it I don't even want to tell you

They're related Come off it They're literally related to the onion You're pulling my tit They're in the same family tree You're pulling my tit I always sensful I literally suspected it for you

years. I only discovered this about last week. Now that I'm thinking about it, I do sense a sisterhood. There is kind of almost a kinship. Yeah. Kim chip. Because it's the reason that click hole is called that is because it's a reference to the part of the onion called the click hole. Really?

But just the hole in the middle. Oh my God. If we were back in the golden age of the onion, what kind of headlines would be dropping? When was this? Like 2000, 2000 to 2007. Hmm. We were putting it in print.

We have a print. Okay. Let's see. Millions dead after Apple unveils new death-defying Ray. Death-de-death-you- fucking AIDS. Yeah. 9-11 was just... Here's one.

It's about to happen. Yeah, great. Shit. 9-11 fucking happened. 9-11 is about to happen. 9-11 appalls New York crowd. that was good that's an actually good one

yeah a crowd crowd is appalled by 9-11 happening before their eyes yeah and they all have

AIDS yeah that would be a good onion headline back in the day God I wish I was George Bush has a mental

breakdown mental breakdown because he's so fucking stupid Bush okay hold on so what Bush is

Bush gets a B-minus in special ed. Yeah. That's pretty good. Because he's mentally disabled. Maybe like Bush is elected president and then it's a picture of A. Bush. Oh, yeah. And then it's like not much, and then it says not much difference from current president. Bush treats ape with same reverence as prime minister because he thinks it's his brother.

That's really good satire. Yeah. I can see that. Bush elected president. of the retard club, that would be a good one. That would actually... I could see that on Onion Headline. Yeah.

You click on like Onion like... You click on the Onion like archive. Yeah. It's like... Published on this day in 2004. Yeah. Yeah. And Patrick elected vice president.

Why would I be there? I was six years old at the time. No one would know who I was. That would kind of, yeah, that would be a joke to show, like, oh, if this guy's the vice president. Yeah, exactly. I guess it would be funny if there was a six-year-old child. That's the vice president. It's just because it's so funny that you're a kid.

Yeah. And you'd be mentioned by name and it would be actually about you. Okay. But just again. Patrick Doran, born. Patrick Doran, there we go. Yeah, an onion article in 1997. Patrick Doran born.

Well, you know, back in the late 90s, the onion was around they were doing, they hadn't figured out the satire stuff yet. And they were just doing headlines about what babies were born that week. Really? They hadn't found their niche yet. Like an onion. It's got to be confusing for the children to grow up and say, like an onion being born.

Like an onion sprouting. Yeah, exactly. That's all what babies. Because with context, with context, you look back and you would read that and say, was I born as a joke? Yeah.

Doesn't make any sense. You were born. But it's just they hadn't figured out the comedy angle yet. Yeah, they didn't really know that that was where they were going. They were like, they were like we knew, we know we want to do kind of a twist on the news.

People are laughing at this. We're not sure if we want to do it in a, comedic way or in a way that's about babies being born every week yes exactly and people keep laughing at our articles so I guess we might as well just lean into it yeah people are laughing at how funny

it is these babies are being born baby born that used to be funny I mean not all humor translates 30 years ago if we did a full newspaper that had different sections and it was like a full fold out newspaper but it was all just babies being born

and the stories of their births who would be the headline for this week yeah Prince William Prince William is a grown man of who was born this week can you Google who was born this week and we can maybe pick one names

celebrity birth yeah let's do a magazine of celebrity births who's born today celebrity who's born today famous birthdays no not famous birthdays today's famous birthdays oh Jimmy Fox

Jimmy Fox yeah and bow die Bow die sniper wolf But these are all people who are old Oh sniper wolf That's the lady

That's the lady that That went to that guy's house I don't know You know about that As sniper wolf She like went to What's his name She like docks the guy

On Instagram live Like went to his house Like I think she might have been Being crazy You're kidding No I wish I was Who is that Shaggy

See these people are all In their 50s Was that Carlos Mincea Did I see Control Fmancai Control F Mencya? Oh, Roddy Rich. Well, that's awesome.

Oh, baby, baby. Baby Keem? Well, it says baby Keen. Oh, interesting. But that's a baby at least. Wait, is that his rap name? Is he changed his end to an M in his last name? Happy Birthday to JPEG Mafia and Jonathan Lipnicki.

Holy shit. JPEG Mafia is so old. JPEG Mafia is older than Jonathan Lipnicki? JPEG Mafia went to Iraq. Yeah. So did Jonathan. Lipnicki. He went by JPEG Mafia when his name is Barrington Hendricks. That's a way better name. Yeah, that would be cool. Yeah. Barrington Hendricks. You heard that new Barrington Hendricks track?

That's why it's more dignified. That doesn't sound like a bunch of crap. That's more dignified. Barrington Hendricks. That's a better than JPEG. He'd be making different. Instead of music. Yeah, instead of glitchy style video games samples, he would make it cooler. Kind of violin and piano. That would make it way cooler if it's like you would go in thinking, oh my God, I'm about to hear. Maybe to you, but I'd throw up. Yeah.

All right. The whiplash of that name into that music. I wouldn't be able to handle that. I would handle it as well. Yeah. Okay. Let's get into some really scary Halloween type of content. Click the.

Let's call it business. We'll call it business. Okay. Because speaking of you being a reporter, we've been doing. What? What thing? The sound of the sound of it goes. not on the right page

fucking arrows to navigate it you fucking asshole go to the go no no it sounds like we're bouncing people who are listening and I have to lean into it we whee whee whee whee whee Okay I'm bouncing on it So today

You said you wanted to go first right? Yeah, I'll go first because I didn't have that many. Okay, today we thought, what's more scary than actual murder? People talking about it. Well, no, it was kind of like, there's nothing more scary. Oh, yeah. So it's like, what's more scary, you know, you don't have to, also people talking about it is not scarier than murder. Well, people talking about how good, how they like it.

Oh, you know what? Yeah. Murder's scary, but you know what scary is some people talking about it. The quiet stoicism of it. of a murder, speaking of his kills. Quiet stoicism, but they're talking about it. But they're talking about it. And there's a murderer and his quiet demeanor.

And he's sitting there and he's saying, yes, I killed millions. That is not as scary as the millions dying to me. Millions dying is scary, sure, but being in a room with a murderer and not knowing, am I the next victim? But we're not doing that. But that's not as...

Okay, so what... we did today is we investigated real murderers who speak of their crimes all over the internet yeah on we had to access i don't know about you guys but had to access the dark web to me too me too and i went to the first uh i think mine is nope this is the wrong one close out of this one completely the next one forums murderer forums it's like the forms like the first one so i went to click I went to murder zone.com this is a place for murderers okay that's what it says and this

this first thing sent chills down my spine okay the very fear of it did this yeah click next anybody have any good vinaigrette slash dressing recipes my wife and I are having a salad with dinner tonight and we're getting bored of the same old Italian dressing I always use and that's murderer Mike he's a well known member he's from body more murderland

Well, Mike, if you're listening to this, well, some people answered. Well, I'm going to say raspberry vinaigrette right off the bat. And you know why, because it looks like blood. Best rapist said, here's a pretty good strawberry balsamic vinaigret. One cup strawberry is holding quartered, third a cup avocado oil. This is similar to, is this your account? No, I am not best rapist on the murder zone for him.

Are you sure? Because this sounds similar to what? Oh, well, guess what? Oh, hey, if I showed you a raspberry and a strawberry, would you be able to tell the difference or fucking know? I'm not a fruit expert. Okay, you're not a fruit expert. No, I'm not a fruit expert. Oh, just a fruit. Okay, and yet you're investigating this fruit. Shoot. Chill on me. I said raspberry. Best rapist said strawberry. Well, you could feasibly replace the strawberries with a raspberry. But maybe to throw people off, maybe to throw people off of his trail. It says he's in Lincoln, Nebraska, which I do not have a Bodymore

murderland version with his crime for Lincoln, Nebraska. Lincoln Kill Braska. That's not very good. Kilbraska's okay. It's not...

Neb to kill. Well, Braska's doing the heavy lifting of that state. It's not good though. It's not good. Any, let's just go, this is your account.

And then this person said... Jane Norton from Jersey City, New Jersey. It looks like a piece of really resembles Jim Norton. He really does look like Jim Norton for some reason. Yeah, just one-third of cup. I mean, these are just all recipes. This is one-third of a cup.

Yeah, if you're interested in making this type of food, just screenshot this. This is a classic cuisine. These are pretty good recipes. If you're making dinner, just make this. Yeah. The next slide. Oh, this was Michael Jackson. It must be no relation.

Just said, Trump is an asshole. Look, I know what we use this website for, but who the fuck in their right mind would vote for this ass clown, seriously. Now, that's another one from Nebraska. That's interesting. Yeah, it's very interesting. Next slide. I forget the next one.

Even the murderers. Okay, so I went onto this person's page because I was like, is this Michael Jackson? Uh-huh. And then I don't know if it is because they said, should I feel bad? So last weekend, I killed millions. Usually this type of thing does not bother me. But for some reason, this time killing millions made me feel like an asshole? I don't know.

So they're saying that No one replied to this also Oh, that's sad Yeah But so this is the guy who thinks Trump is an asshole This guy thinks Trump is an asshole But also Or a clown, sorry

He thinks he's an ass clown But also he is okay with One he's not okay with killing millions But he kills millions Yeah Even the people who kill millions Yeah Can recognize that Trump is a clown

From Russia Yeah, I guess so Wow It's crazy That's deep That is deep They should put that This should be

on a Kamala Harris advertisement. It should. Even a serial killer named Michael Jackson can see that Trump is a D-head. Suited him so that people are like, well, there's no way he's already dead. Oh. I was killed by Michael Jackson. Yeah, right. He's already dead.

I was killed. I was killed by Michael Jackson. I was murdered. First of all, we're police officers. We do not deal with ghosts. Second of all, he already passed away and we arrested him. He was already executed by a military tribunal. It could be one of the guys that police.

plays Corey and Trevor on trailer park boys. One of those guys is named Michael Jackson. They're both named Michael Jackson. One of them. It could have been one of them. I don't know if it's Corey or Trevor. They casted those rules by saying, we're looking for guys named Michael Jackson to play two lame friends.

I don't remember which one it is. It might be Corey. It might be Trevor, but one of them is named Michael Jackson. That's cool. That was the end of your slide, man? Yeah, that's the end of them. I didn't have a lot.

Well, because they're hiding. Yeah. In plain sight. What? They're hiding. Who is? The murderers are hiding in plain sight. I thought you meant Mike, the two Michael Jackson.

No, they're not hiding. And there was only six, there's only six posts on that form. I think people gave up after a while. Yeah, I think people kept putting caught out in the open. People were busy making, maybe doing a girls rewatch and they're too tired to post. No, I don't think they were doing a girls rewatch. Yeah, that seems maybe, yeah, that's not something a murderer would do. Or maybe they're playing a skateboarding game on their computer.

Yeah, and they didn't really. Yeah. Or maybe they didn't understand what the thing was until they looked at the notion, and then they were like, oh, shit, that's right. Mine is for, this one, the first one's from Reddit, ask girls. What is the most painful place to be murdered on a girl? I'm curious on guys, it would certainly be the weiner or the nut sack. Do girls' versions feel pain?

I'd like to maximize pain, and where are they? What do you girls think? I'd like to maximize pain. Yeah, he's a murderer. Miriam Bergman? Tell me that's not a serial killer name. That is a good serial killer name. uh the next post is or the next thing this is something i actually found on r slash murderers oh my god

which is not i thought it was going to be this guy also was confused i thought that it was where murderers posts but this guy posted with a name that is just a bunch of numbers these this sequence on different things what weapons are used by murderers what would you do if you caught your wife cheating on you the mind of a murderer what weapons are used by murderers another question urgent what should i do please help me how to get rid of guilt after committing a crime And these are on How to Get Rid of Guilt After Committing a Crime

Some of those are on R slash ask And some of are on R slash murderers And then That's about all I could find on Reddit So then I went to Similar to you

Oh my God Murderworldforums Dotorg Wow And this is You know if I was I would have called it dotorgans Ah

Yeah To make it even scary And is that That's a knife and a steak The scary... Looks like a chainsaw to me. It could be a human steak, though. Ah.

Or probably not. That could be a... It could be. But it could be one. Okay, next slide. This is making the murder more scary by unique touch. Hey, y'all.

I'm somewhat new to murdering four, and I've been running into a problem where I don't think I'm actually scaring the people when I murder them. They pretty much don't believe I'm going to do it until they actually are dead and then they aren't really scared

they just die. On the last one, I tried to be scary by screaming something intimidating right before I did it, but all I could think of saying was, it's on, and the guy laughed at me. He said I sounded like I was about to kill him with karate. I got so embarrassed, I ended up just leaving him in the box truck

till he starved. I'm still going to count it, though. I'm wondering if I should start wearing a mask, or if anybody would be willing to give me notes on some lines I wrote to make people more scared before I kill them. P.S., I really want my murderer name to be the teacher. So some of the lines are like in that theme. Here's some of what I have.

You have failed my class. No recess for you. and you've been expelled from life. My, what an amazing life you've led. Too bad it will end at the hands of a psycho named the teacher. You're grounded forever. Where's my apple on my desk? That's why this is happening.

I bet you wish you had a substitute right now. It's my home room. You're just dying in it. That's good. I thought that one was pretty good. I don't condone what you do, but I like that. But then somebody replied and said, go next

the teacher thing is really gay and then the O.P. replied and said, I'm going to kill you and then the other guy responded and said, I'm going to kill you. That's just kind of what they do on like the murder. Yeah, the murder forums was it Frigamol? Frigamol. And his

image is a bicep, a very cool bicep. Oh, that's a nice eagle on there. I thought it was cool. Next is what the fuck do I do with the by Iron Insanity. Okay. So he says,

sup y'all noob here, too. Love killing makes me feel completely badass. My question is, two years old? Yeah. I think it's like how many victims they've done.

Oh, because the last one I thought he was saying was four years old. Yeah, I also thought he was saying he was four years old. It could, I guess, be a four year old and a two year old. I took it as like they say,

I'm new to it. Here's the number of people have killed. Four, two. Kind of like you ever read R slash ints? No. The Reddit where they smoke weed

and they say they rate how high they are. Yeah, the number. I was thinking it's kind of like that. It's up y'all, noob here, too. Love killing makes me feel completely badass. My question is, what the fuck do I do with all the bones? I dissolve the bodies, then what?

I just have like a thousand bones to get rid of. I've been throwing away one bone at a time in my normal Wednesday trash pickup because I'm like, who gives a fuck about finding one bone? But eventually I'm going to have to throw away a skull, and these old people I've been killing have giant ass heads. So he admits that he's killing old people. And then someone responds and says

they do kind of a green text thing and say admits to killing old people LMFAO has to be a troll just bury the bones is that is that Marcus Aurelius is there a photo? Somebody, some kind of old statue and then the OPE responds

and says what's wrong with killing old people and then our boy go away responds and says nothing bro, keep bowling with the rails up so they're kind of roasting each other he's roasting him for being kind of a noob uh and then uh you know same shit i'm going to kill you and then next the guy says i'm going it's just how every fucking argument ends on this guy i mean you guys are not like cool as cool

as i thought they were going to be no no no all um all right next one music to do it too need wrecks for good music when i'm killing people i usually have headphones in so they don't hear it for context i mostly kill really young guys and i walk around like the riddler when i do it a lot of the riddler walk around you know that picture of jim carrie where he's like ah oh yeah like that I noticed there's a lot of the name Iron. Iron is a reoccurring theme and a lot of buff guys. It is interesting. That is interesting about this forum.

Yeah, you're right. And I'm sorry, what is this? This is the tags here favorite gym music? Gym is an acronym. Oh, okay. Greatly yending my friend's lives. Okay. Interesting.

Gorely. Yes. Murdered. Wow. Gourly, you're murdered. That actually makes a lot of sense. I'm scared just looking at that. But I get it.

And actually, I didn't do the next ones. I didn't touch it all. Oh. Go next. Parkway Drive, attack attack of mice and men, Emerosa. Attack attack. Yeah.

Oh my God. And some old school rowdy rap songs. I have been heard. Wait, attack attack was, um, oh, I'm confusing. Attack attack is the ones who do, who lean down on their legs. Yeah. I was confusing. where they all look like crabs.

I was confusing them with, I set my friends on fire. Oh, ismf. Isimf? Yeah, ismof, yeah. Ismf off, classic. Next, been really bleeping with Meek Mill lately.

Old Metallica, deftones, and Wu-Tanks-down rotation always. That's our old friend, go away. I like the classics. Brahms, Chopin, Bach, Ludwig,

Fiona, Fiona, and Mozart. That's a Hannibal style. Yeah. Hannibal Lecter. WTF, I must be an old mofo. I never heard of any of these.

Granite. who's a muscle head. Man, all these guys are buffing and have muscles. Well, you've got to be buff if you want to kill people. Texan muscle head. Nine inch nails. And, well, that's it. Nine inch nails.

That's bad. That's good music to do it, too. That's badass. All that music is good to do it too. Yeah. Murdering, that is. And that's the end of my stuff. Wow. For murder.

Murder world. Mine, I just shared with you, Julio. I realized I forgot to share it, but it should be shared on the podcast account now. I actually didn't go on the murderers forums. I wanted a different forum. A different Halloween scary forum So just go ahead and max this out here And I'll show it to you

Yeah, go ahead and share it with somebody Yeah, so this is a forum that I found To find some scary Halloween post today This is a form called people Who got cursed to transform into the Halloween costume They were wearing like the scene in Halloween Town To Calabar's Revenge Forum So this is actually a bustling community

There's a lot of people I guess This happens I guess pretty much every Halloween God damn This is always happening to people It seems pretty tragic I mean And these people seem to have Found a community at least

So A support Yeah Yeah that's nice I do like that they have a shop Yeah They have Halloween World Curse Central shop

And darkness Have we all gone to the darkness section on a forum before Of course And we all Can think of a bunch of things To put on a drop down Don't run out of ideas

So here's the first post I found This is called Who Else By Flub Hey guys Longtime Lurker And I finally got up the courage to do some posting of my own. I got hit with the curse a couple years ago and it's been tough. I know a lot of people got turned into things that are at least real ideas of things,

vampires, werewolves, alien, that type of thing. But I wasn't so lucky and I bet many other of us have a similar experience. I was trying to do one of those very conceptual costumes to be unique. Wouldn't have done it if I knew I was going to get locked in, but here we are. Now I am guy holding shopping bags for his wife for all eternity. Not even sure why I thought that was a funny costume in the first place. Anyway, I'm sure other people are in the same boat. Anyone else with non-traditional transformations. That's a terrible one to be because then the

groceries are going to spoil, right? Unless they're prop groceries. Yeah. Well, it's shopping bags. I think that wives are usually buying clothes. Oh. Oh. Well, what? Right. Here's the argument for doing a Jim Halpert style costume. Uh-huh. Is that, oh, I was cursed on

Halloween. Oh, no, I'm stuck as myself. Yeah. Not a big deal. Yeah. Facebook. But, yeah. Because at the very least you're going to transform it or something. It'd be better to be a demon or something like that than to be some goofy, one of these goofy-ass guy wearing a red shirt. You know this happened to Andy Circus. This didn't happen to him. Here's some responses to this.

Peter Evans says, I thought it would be funny to be a UPS guy for Halloween, but now I literally have to deliver packages all day, every day. It sucks fucking ass. And most UPS guys stop being UPS guys when they go home, but not me because I permanently transformed. so I have to deliver dinner from the kitchen to the dining room and brown cardboard boxes. I'd do anything to reverse this. And then someone at Buzz, 1962, said, went as a bumblebee at age five, cursed, 62 now, sick of pollen. That's sad.

Very sad. Then we have saucy fellow, guy who just ate ribs, and then kind of an upset face. And you can see his profile picture there. He looks like he just ate ribs. And then H.T. says, it seems like a lot of people are down on their transformations, but I'm hyped. Just got turned into the Hocktua girl a couple days

and still going strong. Spit on that thing. Oh, honey. Yeah. You are in for a rude awakening where the world forgets about you. Here's another post. This is Looking to Meet New People

from Jason XD. A little backstory on me. I was attending a Halloween party dressed as Jason Voorhees. I had had a little too much to drink and was getting rowdy. Next thing I knew I was rolling on the ground in a fist fight with a guy who I thought was wearing a Voldemort costume.

Turns out he was a sorcerer and well, I'm sure we all know what happened next. Now thanks to the sorcerer's curse, I'm permanently transformed into Jason Voorhees. It's been a year or two, and I'm feeling pretty lonely, honestly. Most people try to run away from me due to being scared. And I guess I don't blame them. Pre-transformation, I probably would have done the same, but it's starting to get old. I have a nice support system of other guys who got transformed into Jason Voorhees from a curse, and it's been very helpful. But they don't all have the best of social skills. This is awkward

to say, but I guess I'll just say it. I am also not so attracted to Jason Voorhees. I really miss the companionship of normal human women. So I was wondering if there were any women on this forum who is untransformed, tall order I know, who would be interested in meeting up over coffee or drinks and getting to know each other. I guess you'd call it a date, ha ha. I'm pretty tall.

I'll attach a pick of myself below. I'm interested in all types of women, but I do have a type, mainly looking for young promiscuous woman with an interest in camp counseling and no access to dangerous weapons. Send me a PM if interested, smiley face,

and then he attached a picture of himself. And he does look, he looks pretty cute. He looks just like, I think I met this guy. Me too. A couple years ago, we were at Myrtle Pub, and there was a guy who was, it wasn't Halloween, and he was just dressed up as Jason Voorhees

and being completely silent and like ordering from the bar. I think it actually was a guy who got stuck as Jason Voorhees. Yeah, there's no way it wasn't. Somebody responded to this guy. Allie 43 said, do not meet up with this guy.

He cut my head off. Here's another post. Confusing result of transformation. Hey guys, I'm a little confused. So I got cursed by a sorcerer to become my Halloween costume. Yes, I know. We've all been there.

I was dressed as Dumbo the elephant, my favorite character. So I transformed it to Dumbo, right? wrong. I turned into a gay guy. When the sorcerer accursed me, I really expected to turn into Dumbo. My costume was Dumbo, but I turned gay? I know it was the costume transformation spell. It wasn't some gay

spell or something. I've been sucking dick all week and my wife is pissed off. Was there a mistake in the spell? Did it look into my heart and discover I was secretly gay? Does anybody have any experience with this? Is there an easy way to reverse this? And then Reaper 666 responded and said, you dressed as Dumbo for Halloween?

And then Hose Man said, The curse only turns you into what you're wearing. I wasn't secretly a firefighter in my heart. You are gay. And then the count said, how do you know it was the costume transformation curse? Do you have a picture of the sorcerer?

And ears 1-1-2, that's the guy, said, yeah, one second. And then he posted this picture. And then the count responded and said, you are gay. Here's another post. Idea on how to turn back to yourself. Just had a great idea on how to reverse transformation.

I haven't made able to test it yet, but hopefully this helps somebody. This is from Beach Mouse 1, by the way. Okay. Basically all you would have to do, I think, is just wear a Halloween costume that is of you pre-transformation. For example, right now, I'm Freddie Krueger. But I would just put on my iconic beanie I always wear and my chunk-no-captain-chunk shirt on over my striped Krueger sweater and, like, hold a prop that represents my personality, like a milkshake or something. Then you just have to get a sorcerer to do the transformation curse on you again, and you should just turn back into your original self.

I think it should be foolproof. Has anybody turned back from the transformation yet? I haven't been able to try this method because I don't have access to a sorcerer. Does anyone know how to get a sorcerer to redo the curse? And then Harry Potter said, don't think this would work for me. I don't have any defining qualities. That's sad. Sister Sensual said, I guess theoretically it could work, but I don't know how to find a sorcerer.

Maybe you could dress as a sorcerer and then get cursed, and then you'd transform into a sorcerer and then you'd transform the power to curse. Why is she on this forum? Dr. Logical said, well, you'd need a sorcerer anyway. If you wanted to get cursed into transforming into a sorcerer, I guess the practical thing to do would to be just to dress as a sorcerer every Halloween and just hope you run into a sorcerer who's feeling like cursing people. A sorcerer isn't a bad idea for a Halloween costume either, nice and scary. And then Chaco Boy said, dressing as a sorcerer every Halloween, that is not a scary costume at all, L.O.L. You would be the laughing stock of the party. I'd rather just be a donut forever. And then Dr. Logical responded, fireback, and said, this isn't scary to you.

That's Jafar. Hold on. Next page here, Chaco Boy says, that's Jafar, retard. And then Wolfman respond, or Wolfman, sorry, responds. It's always some newbie posting Jafar, not a sorcerer, educate yourself. Pumpkin O2 says, Jafar is a vizier, not a sorcerer. And then Pikachu says, kill yourself. That would be a bad one. And then I just found one more post here.

This is any other comedy podcast fans? This is from Officer Scott. Anyone else here are a fan of podcasts? My favorite would have to be podcast about lists. I know it's not that popular a pick nowadays, but those guys really make me laugh. Anybody else listen? And Pendleton says,

yes, me and my family love pot about list. My favorite thing they've done would have to be the five weeks of planets. O.J. the alien forever. Five weeks of war sucked ass, though. sure what happened. Wasn't that bad. And then Webb says,

I haven't listened very much, but that Caleb guy's a hunk. Wouldn't mind of a sorcerer curse my wife to transform while she was dressed as him, if you know what I'm saying, ha ha. And yeah,

five weeks of war was terrible. Not sure whose idea that was. It wasn't that. And then there was another guy, Leaf. Hello, everyone. I'm a leaf. I just grew and I can't wait

to meet everyone. And then Durville, a moderator, I guess, came in and said, Hi, Leaf. I think you might have the wrong forum. You're probably looking for Leaf Forum. This is people who got cursed

to transform into the Halloween two town. who Calabar's Revenge Forum. Let's try to keep these threads on topic from now on. And Leif said, I hated five weeks of war, by the way. A lot of five weeks of war hate on this forum for some strange reason. I don't know what's going on with that. Maybe it's because they were transformed and they're kind of not right in the head.

It's a pretty old thing to be worried about, too. Yeah, it's a strange. Is that a year old, five weeks of war. It's a weird thing to bring up. Even come into your head if you're writing these forum posts, I would say. We need to do another five weeks soon. No. You do the five weeks of Patrick.

I think maybe the five weeks of, I mean, just based on the people who were transformed due to a curse from the same curse as Calabars, Revenge Forns or whatever it was called, I feel like the five weeks format is maybe not that good. It just seems like they didn't like five weeks of war. Yeah, but they might just not like war. I mean, we only did it twice. Yeah. And I would say it was about. And what? That was only three people who hated it.

Yeah. One of them was a leaf. Yeah. Don't put a lot of stock in the opinions of a leaf. Yeah, I guess not. I don't know. So maybe let's do five weeks of war part two. Five weeks of mushrooms.

Five weeks of mushrooms. What would week one be? Well, but we're, I'm thinking like anoki mushroom. See, there's only two mushrooms. Portobello. We're doing Mario mushroom. No, we don't do a Mario mushroom.

First of all, there is a real mushroom that is the Mario mushroom. Which one is it? It's called the Strepacoccus meningitis. What's it called? Oh, my God. It has a disease. Yeah.

Oh, well. That one, that one, that one, right there. Yeah, that's a toad. That does look just like a Mario mushroom. I can't even fucking lie. I forget the name of it. It's a full real-life Mario mushroom. That's dangerous to actually put a mushroom.

And I think it's mad, dangerous, actually. It looks dangerous. I don't think it does Mario style actions to a body. That is terrible. Yeah, not good to have a nature. It doesn't make you grow up. It's Loki Nintendo's fault, though. for making that mushroom look so friendly.

Who's the best... What's the name of the bastard who invented Mario? Fuck you, Miyamoto. Fuck you, Shigiru. Which one is his name? Shigiru Milamoto. Oh, both? Japanese people have two names.

It's a unique cultural... Yeah. Tradition. Well, I'm very interested in that. I have a family name and a given name. Really? See, in the U.S., we all just like, you know, Patrick, Caleb, Cameron.

I know, some people get their kids, you know, some people are named bug. Some people are named Chad Anastasia. Uh-huh. You know, we have interesting names. There's interesting names. Five weeks of names. That's a good idea.

That's a fucking good idea. That's dynamite. Lightning in a bottle. All right, guys. The world of Halloween will continue, but not five weeks of it. Just through the end of the month. Yeah.

It wasn't five weeks. But we do like Halloween. Halloween. We've completely butchered the set. Yeah. And murdered it. And the kind of color grading is Halloween is scary. We decided.

We decided that the scariest thing ever is a podcast that is so blue. Lou that you can't even watch it. That's kind of the idea. Yeah. This wig is getting hair everywhere. Yeah, this Stein is no comfy. Yeah.

I like my chef's hat. You know what this is making me want to do? Go home and cook. And you go home. No, just cook. Just go home. No, I want to cook. I want to go home.

Okay, you can go home. All right. Shows over. What? Do we, you don't have anything to plug. Bye. Bye. Like, yeah, you're, you're one of Kronenberg's kids.

And you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, God, I don't know what to do in life. I'm trying to find my niche. I can always fall back on making movies with my crazy last name that nobody else has. I'll always get into a theater. And then you're like, but you know what? I have on, I'm not going to do that. And then your brother does it.

And you're like, fuck. All right. Hit it, let's go. You're trying to be a chef. You keep making scary food. That would suck. Oh, my God. People keep, sir.

Oh, yeah, soup for table four. It's a hot dog, like microwaveed hot dog coming out of the soup. Croning burgers. You're making Cronin burgers Croning burgers Croning burgers is a really good idea for a restaurant If there's brothers

Then yeah you do Cronin burgers And Cronin burgers and Cronin burgers It's a father's son Everyone who's name as Berg should be a burger And they would have something called the hand burger Who is the best burg? The best bird for us to have a burger restaurant

Cronom burger is pretty good Wahlberger is also If Walburgs didn't exist That would also be a really good one Yeah To think of existing Cronin burgers Remember when they had the fucking

they had the bond me burger that was the funniest thing to find out yeah they had a bond me burger for like so long yeah it was like come on well the thing is they've each one of them has probably been racist to every single yeah ethnicity yeah they're from they're from Boston of course

they were any sort of thing if they do ice burgers yeah they do it's made by an iceberg well that's good too Sam burgers just the one guy yeah and a lonely island they all have to be the lonely fry yeah the lonely Samburgers are Can I have a Sandburger with a lonely fryland, a large lonely fryland?

That's good. And a please don't destroy my soda or something. I don't know.