Podcast About List - Ep. 344 - The First Official World Record-Breaking Cream Filled Podcast Episode

Episode Date: June 25, 2025

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What I wanted to start with is that I found, sorry to interrupt, but I found your birthday present from months ago in a shirt pocket. Can I open it? You can open it. It's going to show someone's address on there. So be careful. I'm going to open it down here. Open it down there because it has their address.

Why is it? You are fucking kidding. I'm not kidding you. This is from so long ago. I know what it is. This is from months. I remember being shown those. What the fuck.

Yep. That is genuinely one of the best gifts I've ever gotten in my life. Yeah, well. I have to open it. It's a silkworm cocoon. Yeah. I have to open it and I have to wear it. You have to wear it now.

You have to start wearing it now. So I hope it didn't break because this has been at the bottom. them on my laundry pile for a while. This is so... It was in a shirt pocket for some reason. Wait, how do you put it? I don't know how you put it on. It's made very nicely.

It's a homemade pirate bracelet from a pirate that we found. From one of our favorite pirates. It barely fits on my massive wrist. Okay. Looks like you have to wear it somewhere else. Looks like someone else is going to have to get it. That could be an anklet. I didn't really check.

If it doesn't fit on my wrist, I do not think it is an ankle. I think it could fit. You have got, put your ankle on the table. You got some skinny ankles, man. I'm busy, man. I'm putting on my new gift. You know, help? I do.

It's hard. You're having troubles. It's so tight. What size is? There you go. I don't know what size I got. And I think because of the pirate style, pirates don't typically have large wrists.

Yeah, they're pretty scrawny. Pirates usually have, whoa, it has skulls on it. This is from a guy that we have loved for years. And I, to the point where I don't even want to talk about him that much. Yeah, I don't know what to take that at him at all. But he recently got into making bracelets. And this is, this is an excellent gift. It's a great gift.

This is an excellent gift. It's probably one of the best gifts that any of us has given one of us. Yeah, that's really, really good. Usually you get me a gift that's like a Barbie thing or I have a weird. But this is an actually good gift. And I forgot to give it. How much was it? $12.

No, it was $35. What? What? He's $35 bucks. Are you serious? It's how much he's charging for these? For real? Yeah.

Wow. Well, it's worth every penny. Yeah. I mean, that's really, especially the delay. The materials must be, I mean, 50 bucks alone looking at that thing. So he must be taking a lot. He's taking a huge skulls. You've ever seen the website where the guy sells the shrunkenheads?

No. Like, it's like real shrunkenheads.com or something? Oh, yes. like $10,000. Well, that makes sense. That's a shirken head. Those are expensive. I mean, again, but the cost of materials for that is pretty high.

Even more expensive than $10,000 is probably a huge body. Well, just a head. Well, you're not shrinking other, there's no, nobody's buying a shrunken torso. Exactly. So you don't need to buy the torso. I wish. True. But why can't you buy a shrunken torso?

Yeah. Well, it's just not very interesting. No, it's not interesting at all because it doesn't take, oh, you got a baby's, interest you? You got a baby's torso and then it's just like, no, it's a shrunken. Well, it's just. Well, the torso that you probably would just want to eat the torso. Yeah. Oh, you're not eating, you're fine with the head because you're not using it.

I'm not going to use it. What am I going to do with it? Do they take the skull out of the head when they shrink it? They have to. They got it. How do they? Well, yeah, they must, right? Is it, they must just be the skin because it's all stitched up.

I think it's just skin. Because they stitch up. They skitch up. They skinch up. They skitch up the eyes and the mouth. Yeah. Is that how it works? I thought they were pickling those in vinegar or something. No, no, no.

I think they tanned it, they cut it all up and they tan it like leather. Like a football. Like a football. It's basically like a football. Okay. And then get ready for a bumpy ride. Okay. Get ready for a bumpy ride.

White and long face. That is a great movie. I say why the long phase. He's cool. All the time. I said, get ready for a bumpy ride a lot. Get ready for a bumpy ride. You said it on the plane.

White a long face. Me? You said it on the plane to Ohio. Really? Because it was a southwest flight and I'd never been on a southwest flight. Or American. sorry, I'd never been on a plane. And that guy's American in the movie.

Yeah, he's an American guy. I'd never been on a plane that small. And I was like, and I said that? And you said, yeah, you said, get ready for a bumpy ride. And I went, oh, my God, this is going to be bad. What if we had gone between two buildings and shrunken to go long? If only they had done that back in 2001. Exactly.

Exactly. If they had just gone, why did that guy had been there? Yeah. Why did it long face? And I'd go right between. Because there's a lot of people don't. is not going to have that guy on it. So it's kind of a moot.

Because there's only one of that guy. You know, the whole thing is... Okay, but what if they put a quarterback on the first plane who throws a perfect... Dude, the whole thing is an exercise and futility. Stop. I'm done. 9-11 happened. I'm done.

There's nothing we can do now. I'm done. Besides, just go out in the streets and just scream. Yeah, I've done it. The top of our lungs. Why? Why did you do it? Why?

And then somebody comes out and tells you exactly why. Why? Some conspiratord comes out and says... Dude, I'm sick of conspirators. Oh my God, ever since you introduced me to this word, I've been saying it. You never heard that before? You've never heard that word before? What?

Not in my family, because they all, they are conspiracy. My whole family is conspiracy. You probably heard the word conspirate genius. A lot. I heard conspirate geniuses out there. All there are smart theories. I'm conspirer smart. Yeah.

So you like conspiratorards or you don't? Oh, they're in my family. There's a lot in my family. They runs in your family. It runs in my family, yes. But you don't, you didn't get it. What's this big story you have to break to us? I didn't have a big story to break it.

You said, I have to, you said, I have something amazing to tell you. I just, it's literally, I would just, last night I watched like six episodes of Desperate Housewives and I think it's my new favorite show. This was what you needed to say. Yeah. Have you guys ever seen it? Yeah. When I was a kid, my mom used to watch it.

It's so good. You would love this one. I'm sure I would like it. It's so funny. I've actually thought of watching it before, but I've never watched it. It's an amazing show and I highly recommend it. Dude, I was, I saw an amazing show the other day. Yeah.

Which is it came on Pluto TV. I turned on Pluto TV while I was working, man, and I went to my favorite channel that I'm always turning on on Pluto TV, Fear Factor. And I'm going to Fear Factor. I'm expecting to see Fear Factor, and what do I see? But a version of Fear Factor that is known as Fear Factor South Africa

that they were playing on Pluto TV. And I'm watching this, and I watched it very briefly, and the one challenge I saw was they were having a paintball fight or like an airsoft fight. And the guy was like, whoever loses the fight does not get to have supper. And then I had to turn it out because they're eating eyeballs and penis. They're not doing that. Is there any challenges like that on the American one?

Oh, there was another. I watched two challenges, actually. It was the paintball one. I caught the tail end of that one. And then it went into this challenge. They eat a tail end on that show. This challenge is called elephant dung. And they have a pool that has elephant dung.

in it. Okay. So that's not just the name of the challenge. There is elephant dung in the challenge. Well, that's what they said. They said the name of this challenge is elephant dung. And then it said on the screen, elephant dung. It's not a really clear. They went in and they had to go under and get bowling balls out of the pool, the above ground pool. Fill with elephant's dung. Well, it's water and then there's some elephant dung in it. Oh, who gives a fuck? So it floats on top? Who gives a fucking shit? They have to swim up.

They swim in water? It's an above ground pool. So it's just like, and also they were like, they introduced By, like, showing the pool, I mean, like, you guys remember this pool that you've been swimming in for the past week? Yeah, we're about to use it in a challenge. No. They were like, what? Wait, they can only afford an above ground pool for fear factor. Oh, yeah, they're going to take it down.

It's pretty low budget. It's, uh, who's the Rogan? Some guy. Uh, yeah, I didn't know. Was he a South African famous guy? I mean, I wouldn't know. I don't have a lot of that. I know you.

I don't think they do either. Yeah, I guess he's their big one. Wasn't him. I can tell you that. I don't know who else is famous in South of that. Charlie's Throne and Elon, I think that's it. Is Charlie, I thought she was from... Yeah, we talked about this two weeks ago.

Neil Blomkamp, is he from there? He just likes making movies about it. Maybe he just likes making movies about it because of the apartheid themes. D. Antwerd. Chappie. Chappie. You got to walk like that. Why was everyone pretending that D. Antwerd was good music?

Shit was crap. It was so bad. Dude, it was hype. It was so bad. You know what? I take it back. It's not crap. It was hype.

I think you freaky. That's one of the worst songs I've ever heard. Dude, and I like crap. I like crap. Okay. You guys know I like crap. I wouldn't say that song is so far from the type of stuff.

No, yeah, I know. I could definitely hear you listening to that song. You could see me, like you walk in the office one day. I think you're freaking. You can see me doing that shit or liking that shit falling into the trap of

of hipsterdom. Well, that wasn't even really. Don't know. Yeah. That was hister crap, bro. Chapie was about as,

of a movie as you can make. It's true. It was a big movie, but they started out as hipsters. I watched that clip from that. I've never seen that movie, but I watched that clip where he's teaching him how to walk.

I've seen it a thousand times. You see that? No. He's teaching the robot how to walk. He's like, you got to walk like daddy. You got to walk gangster. And it's very...

Just fucking crap. I can't believe that. They groomed a kid. That's why no one talks to them anymore. Yeah, where they adopted a kid or some shit. And groomed it. Oh, I didn't even know that part.

That's what I heard. They adopted it. Allegedly. And they fucking groomed it. I think the adoption is enough for me to be out of the picture. I don't even know anything about this besides their music. I just heard, I heard people being like, fuck, man. Fuck not them.

And it's like, who cares? Yeah. Fucking cares. You thought they were a novelty to you anyway. You found your target. They were a novelty to you anyway. You finally found your target making me sound smart. They were just a novelty to you anyway.

We go in on Brian Wilson and you go, oh, I don't know, I don't know. but you found you got it I found my target you found your target yeah well you can go in all day go in all day go ahead talk your shit about

what else you gotta say your music's crap and you groomed a kid how about nothing about the haircut haircuts that haircuts is something I would probably get so I can't even talk shit about it

you would get that haircut I would get that hair cut for maybe a couple weeks for maybe a couple weeks I'll get that haircut that would be sick okay guys again okay please explain

everybody what we're doing today Okay, so this was an idea that I want, we need to set, we need to set a world record, first of all. Again. What was the first one? I don't know. Yeah, we must have said a few. We did set a world record. What about most voting stickers on a shirt?

It's got to be two. It's got to be two. But the world record, you know, and there's, because you can't do longest podcast because some losers. We thought about it. Losers do it. They do it in shifts. They do in shifts. It's the most fucking bullshit thing ever.

When we were looking up the war record, because we were like, maybe we'll beat it for 300, and we saw that it was like, it's like, it's like, no, it's like, I think it's four or five days, but it's people taking shifts, which is so fucking bullshit. Yeah, it's not, it should not count. It should have to be the same, there should have to be a continuous, a group of people. Anyway, so that record has been stolen. We deserve that one. Yeah. Um, funniest podcast, we can win that one. Uh, maybe try it for that one. But the one that one that one, but the one that I wanted to set today that I thought nobody has done this yet and nobody and I feel fairly certain that nobody will do it in the time between we record this and this comes out tomorrow morning. You never know. But you'd never know. Yeah. It is my intention that today we are going to set the world record for the first cream filled podcast. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So what you get that applause button actually. So first a couple of things here. I saw a ghost. When you say set a world record for the first. Yeah. How many of those? you know, have been

recorded. First guy, first girl, Adam Eve. Adam Eve, World Record. First tall guy. Okay. Robert Wadlow. First in height. Oh, you're saying like a ladder. There's a taller guy than

Wadlow now. Well, there's like an Indian guy that's like one inch bigger. Oh, is yeah. I don't think he is bigger. You don't think so. And this is alive tall guy. And this is what I'm saying, man. He's the most alive tall guy. Yeah. Because Robert

Wadlow. Someday some guy might be born who's taller than him and take that record away from him. But you can never take away first. You can never take that away. That's ours forever. Tell me what the format of the cream filled episode is. That's what we have to figure out.

So here's what I'm going to say is that what makes it so remarkably cream filled is that it's not just visual. We kind of dress cream. I'm just like an oatmeal cream pie. Look at me. Yeah, we creamed a little on it.

Yeah. But we're not creaming visually on this episode. We're creaming in audio. The whole point is to encapsulate the cream within the podcast itself, which is the audio. You have a stack of envelopes here. This is to kill the fly that is roaming around. See, I thought you were going to do maybe like a Carnac Johnny Carson thing and do like, you know, like maybe some cream film. When something is cream.

is cream filled. For it to be cream filled, there must be a husk. Right. So this is why I wanted to bring this over to this side today. Because I want to, first of all, so I think that basically we can agree that cream filled means there's cream in the middle of something. No argument here. And so we need to do a podcast episode that has

cream in the middle of it. Now, what we need to figure out is what is outside of the cream? Because all types of things can have cream in them. There's Oreo cream puff. Okay, sure.

Meat, typically, does not have cream in the middle. Vegetables. Vegetables. Well, yeah. So usually it's fruits. Fruits, yeah. So there's cream-filled fruits. It's usually going to be a pastry.

Or a treat. A treat. So it's sweet, some kind of sweet carbohydrate. Yeah. So we can, we can put the cream up. Okay. Right away. That's the cream.

I mean, we know. Yeah. We know we have to get to and then get through and leave. Yeah. Uh-huh. But what are we into? But it's audio, it's audio, right? So here's my suggestion.

Maybe we pause right now, get some instruments, do a cover of that band Cream. In a white room. See, he's already halfway there. Interesting. That could be one element of it. So I'm going to write down cream, Clapton, Bruce. I'm just going to write down cream.

Ginger. To note that idea. But so this, we think that... This is looking like an egg, though. It looks like a donut. Well, it is almost a... This is a cross section. A yolk can be creamy.

Yeah, yokes can certainly be creamy. I mean, I kind of was going cream puff a little bit or like maybe like a twinkie or something. Let's decide on something. Yeah, that's what I mean. We need to decide on something here. In terms of the thing that is covering the cream. Yeah. And again, sandwiching the cream.

Uh-huh. Again, it's mostly anything that's cream filled. But if it's sandwiching the cream, then I feel like we might as well go Oreo because it's not, we're not hitting the upper, that's not. That's not. Oreo is not cream. That's cream. Cream. Cream with an E.

Cream. C-R-E-M-E. That's how I've always read it. That's true. Okay, so then we have to do cream puff because that's the most obvious one. Yeah. Or lobster tail. What is it called? The fucking...

Oh, yeah. You know the one I'm talking about? It's also just puff pastry. Or a whoopie pie. It's kind of a pastry version of Oreo. Whoopi pie is good because it's easier to talk about chocolate. We start the episode doing impressions of Whoopi Goldberg and doing impressions of Whoopi Goldberg. Here, just let me let me do this here.

We're whoopi up top, whoopee at the bottom. Dude, that's going to be hard to sustain. So this is a whoope pie. Yeah. Everyone knows that. Yeah, it reads. This is chocolate. And I'll just write chaco.

Chaco. Because I just can't write that much. Yeah, that's fair. And what I want to do here is for chocko. Let's just get some adjectives to describe chocolate. What does chocolate like? Hold on. We got to move that.

I'm going to move the light so you can read the whiteboard. What does chocolate like? Chocolate, I believe I would describe chocolate. as rich rich rich is good rich um bitter bitter and sweet and sweet of bitterness to it and sweet of course bitter sweet bitter sweet let's what you can say bitter sweet dark dark oh that's good dark not necessarily dark chocolate but it is darker than cream it is darker than cream uh delicious delicious delicious is got to be on there if it's my list that i'm making you're turning the lights all the way around what what uh doesn't help at all because the overhead lights

well that's okay could turn the overhead lights off that's a good idea yeah dude fuck it we got business to take care of what else uh rich bittersweet dark dark damn it got dark right as i said dark it's fine yeah there we go we'll get a black marker someday but i don't think they make them in new york No, it's hard to find. They're really hard to find. Rich. I just saw myself on the, with his jacket on these shorts. I looked like Kevin Smith.

Rich, bittersweet, dark, delicious. Worldwide. Decadent. Decadent. Decadent's better than worldwide. Worldwide. Chocolate is worldwide. You have different countries have their own types of chocolate. It's not really South American.

South American. South American. South American Dubai. No. Dubai chocolate is big right now. That's a meme, bro. Yeah, but it's big. That's not.

are what people are going to be listening to this episode in the year 3,050. Dubai will be flat. I wonder if there's ever been a cream-filled podcast. Oh, well, there's been millions. Oh, what was the first one?

Yeah. What did the first one say? So it looks like we have room for one more adjective. What about? Dark, delicious, decadent, South American. Milk-y. No, milk is not.

Milky-milk chocolate. It's not even often an ingredient in chocolate. Okay. Milk-y milk chocolate. Cacao. Beans. Yeah. Beans.

Ciccao. Beans. Beanish is good Bean made Bean made Bean spawn Bean spin Bean from

From bean From bean from a cocoa bean It Bean from it I've been from it Bean from it was Being from it was Born

Made Bean from it was made Bean from it was made from Okay so here's the list We have rich Bittersweet Dark delicious decadent, South American, and bean from it was made from.

Okay, so that's chocolate sorted. Yeah, that's chocolate. So, this is cream. So cream, what do we know about cream? Cream is C-R-E is a cream-milky here. So we'll start off with creamy. Creamy. I mean, that's, I'm down with milky too.

I can even say creamy plus milky. Milky, it's not puffy. Smooth. Oh, yeah, smooth, smooth. Smooth. Smooth is good. Fatty. Fatty.

Fatty. Stiff Peaks, depending on That's more of a meringue thing Wipped Yeah Well cream in the middle Of a cream filled

Whoopie Pie is whipped Yeah, because we're not talking About liquid cream The center Yeah, that's true Center Centrist Filling

Filling Okay, we got room for probably Time reword Light Light slash white Light and white refreshing that's a call it refreshing cream

and then what is it from cats drink on it well cows a cows a cow's a cow no a cow's milk it's not cow's egg cow cow cow cowabunga cow milk let's try that one cow's milk

from it was made from from it was made from cow's milk it oh I don't have room it w it w it wkows okay all right all right add drop the pen okay okay okay okay for cream we have creamy plus milky smooth fatty whipped center filling light slash white refreshing it will cows milk yeah i wanted to say it was flea and a racer right there we can move the words around no it's impossible all right it's okay so with this in mind yeah we're past it now What can we, what, what should we do?

I think we need to do, we need to put a, we need to start. Okay. On chocolate. And we need to do, we need to divide these up. So let's just split it right after delicious. Or we'll do half a delicious. Well, I think we could. We could add one more word and then we have four to talk about up top.

I don't think, I don't think, see, I don't. Now, here's where we, what we did, where we decide. Are we talking through this list and talking about them? or are we just trying to have a conversation that fills these adjectives? I think it's more honest to the idea of a cream-filled episode if we talk about, if we have a conversation that resembles these descriptions. Yeah, but I think you're right that this might be hard. So I think, yeah, let's do a conversation at first.

That is rich, bittersweet, and dark. Okay. Okay. And then the second half. Then we'll move into a conversation that's creamy, milky, smooth, fatty, whip center filling light white and refreshing and blue cows and then and then have a conversation that is deliciousness decadent south american and being made from and that will be down here okay yeah that's the second half all right so it's the third half we're the third it's difficult

when you get into it because it's like you think you're complicated yeah because this is why i wanted the wipe because you think you think the second half and it's like oh the second half of the because are these one whole or is the cream separating or is the cream part of them? So let's see, we have, we got, we got about 40-ish minutes left. Okay. So let's do 10, 20, and 10. Mm-hmm.

Okay. I think that works for me. That makes sense, right? 10 chocolate, 20 cream, 10 chocolate. All right. 10, 20, 10. Because that's, well, here's an interesting thing that this, that we've just discovered. Sure.

Is that the cream is the most important part of a whoope pie. Well, yeah, yeah, I think that's, I think that's, I think that's, That's true. The cream is the most important. Because instead, if you don't have the cream, it's just too soft fucking whatever. Yeah, the too rich, bittersweet, dark, delicious, decadent, South American bean from it was made from. I know, totally.

Okay, so let's start right now with a conversation that we might find rich. And we'll start. What is like a rich conversation? Like, we talk about money? A rich vein. A rich vein of conversation. Bittersweet and dark. I'd had the most delectable nightmare.

Or no, it's not delectable. I had, I had such a, well, I had a tragic experience that made me happy. Oh, really? What was it? It's a good question. Yeah. This is for Rich. It was night.

It was night. It was night. I couldn't see a thing, first of all. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, so how do you know what happened then? Well, through audio. Oh, okay. One of the other senses.

Audio. Yeah, audio is in there as well. Well, so what happened, though? Do you have any idea? Yeah, well, I just, I heard, well, what I heard was, first I heard, I heard someone sobbing. Oh, that's horrible. But I heard someone just smiling as well. Well, that's sweet.

And I heard money clinking. Oh, you heard their coins jing. This is now we're doing the listing. They were going down the list again. We want something that on the whole. Okay. is like all of these things. Okay.

Maybe it's because I've been watching vampire movies. This is making me think of a vampire, rich, bitter, sweet, and dark. Is it not? Yes, that's perfect. Well, I was going to say, I was going to say, if you start the conversation dark, because we're comedians, we can find the, we can go to bittersweet and then get to the richness of it. Okay. So let's start dark.

Let's start with a dark topic. Okay, so vampires, I think, are also. Yeah, they're very dark. Glad the Impaler. He actually murdered countless people. Yeah, but he also had descended. Oh, that's horrible. That's really bittersweet.

Yeah. That he had to... He's murdered so many. Well, the descendants is bittersweet because it's like, oh, children are amazing. I'm so glad the children are being born. Wait, they're descended from one of the most evil motherfuckers that ever walked to face of the earth.

They have his blood in their blood. Yeah. And blood being vampire is so interesting. Blood is very familiar to a vampire. And they have just such dark gothic ideas in clothes. And not to mention the castles. Who would you be really shocked to find out your descended from? well probably Vlad the Impaler

because I mean mostly a 100% Irish Yeah that would be a surprising It would be surprised because then he's like a hold What is he? Yeah for me it would probably be some type of No he's Romanian Romanian.

Yeah you're thinking of Genghis Khan I am thinking of Genghis Khan Wait we were talking about Vlad the Impaler And you were talking about You thought he was Mongolian? I thought that they were related At least they're both dark They're both they're related in their darkness

They are some of the darkest humans in terms of acts. But when they say he killed, did he even really know what was going on because they didn't have phones? It was all fucking birds. Yeah.

He probably, I mean, back then, there was not much knowledge. It was the dark ages. It was the dark ages. It was the dark ages. It was a bittersweet time. It was because on one hand, there's not a telephone inside.

But on the other hand, there's not a telephone. Oh, yeah. Yeah, so tell me that ain't bitter. Not to mention the torture. Yeah, the torture was pretty insane. But we talked about torture. recently. That wasn't really a chocolate-coded

style episode. So now... Wait, when did we talk about torture? Because we were talking about the different kind of torture devices that we had. I know we haven't talked in a little bit, but we had that, we were talking about that. Interesting. I didn't even know that. Like the last episode we did, we were talking about torture.

Oh. Yeah, we did, we did a whole episode on torture. Things that are bittersweet. Dude. Emo music. Yeah. Yeah. There's the happiness of the melody. Yeah. Of the catchiness. Yeah.

And then the sadness of the lyrics. These people wasting their lives making this music. Yeah. There's something so bittersweet about that, actually. About them just staying in their hometown forever. Also the music of the Smiths and Morrissey, that's a bittersweet. Oh, interesting. They directly inspired a lot of the emo.

What would you say is bittersweet about Morrissey? Probably racist and gay. Racist and then his love for animals, his veganism. oh yeah but he takes it a little too far though because I think the racism and the veganism are very intertwined yeah he said that the Chinese are subhuman because they eat dogs yeah I guess that's bittersweet that what's the sweet part that you would say that his love for the dogs I can see that but it's a bit of a stretch it's a bit of a stretch to say that it doesn't seem so much like I'm really reaching yeah really reaching though that's that is dark that is dark and he got

very rich from his music. He might be the most chocolatey man in the world. He might be Stephen Patrick Morsy might be the most chocolatey man of all time. The smiths should have changed their name

to the candy smiths, chocolate smiths. That would have been good. Yeah, that's what people used to craft it. A chocolate smiths, they could have clang, clang, clang, glimmering.

Well, let's think about how different their songs would be. How different are? Heaven knows I'm Eminem's now. Okay. Mm-hmm. All right. I was looking for a bite.

Okay. William, it was really chocolate. Yeah. You maybe should have stopped at heaven knows I'm M&M's now because that's good. Yeah, that one was good. But there's something else. Oh, it turns into M&M's?

Girlfriend in a diabetic coma because she ate too much chocolate. I don't know any of the other stuff. All I know is Heaven knows I'm M&M's now. Yeah, that's one of my favorite chocolate-based songs. Yeah. Is there any chocolate songs that we... Willie Wonka soundtrack? I'm an idiot.

Willie Wonka's soundtrack. Is there any that are not explicitly chocolate? I don't know that band. They sang that song, A You Sexy Thing. Oh. Oh, and you know what? Did they also make the song Hot Chocolate from Polar Express? No.

They are not involved in that, but if they were, it would make a lot of sense. Hot, hot, hot chocolate. Yeah. Okay, I'm going to hit on dark here and kind of throw this back into the mix. They should make a gritty. the R-rated reboot of the Polar Express. There's some time, or when did that come out? There's some time?

There's some time the public domain to take it over. It's going to be quite a while. I think that we need to petition the owners of the IP because it's a rich vein to be mine. When did that movie come out? Is it based on a book from the 20s? Because it's what I thought it was. The movie's not from the 1920s.

The movie's not, but the book it's based on. I thought that maybe could be from the 20s. don't think they had trains back then when they did have trains back in the 1920s when does the when does the stuff that we grew up with when does that expire well like it's all very it's all very different i think that's not for a long as time let's see i think that stuff from the i don't even know i can't make it become public domain okay i found this on the web for when does rugrats become public domain it doesn't really help me what is that your guy's voice. I think it's, but I think

it's really different based on different. There's like the laws, I think are very intricate. They're very complicated on what goes when. Yeah, it seems like they really didn't understand much about the future when they made those laws. I think they, yeah, I think they made the laws and they were right to do what they did and then everybody lobbied them really hard.

Yeah, Disney really lobbied them. Yeah, yeah. And Disney became rich from his drawing of a mouse. Uh-huh. Which had dark ears. Uh-huh. And a bitter sweet smile. Yeah. Our story, yeah. Yeah. So I guess it's a It's 95 to 120 years, I think it says.

Dude, that sucks. So nothing that we ever... So it would be 2086 when Rugrats becomes public domain. In our lifetime. We'll be long dead by 2086. I don't know. We might be alive depending. And even then, it's like very complicated because it's like, oh, like, it's like how Steamboat

Willie went into public domain, but Mickey Mouse didn't and stuff like that. Like the movie itself or the show itself can go into public domain, but the character. The actual IP can stay copyrighted. And the fact that we as a society can't use it. but it's right but the magic to use the characters of the polar express to tell the story is bittersweet dude the what is the magic that lives

on and Mickey Mouse is bittersweet the stuff I would have done to the nerd kid in the Polar Express my R-rated movie demons just fucking ripping him limb from it would have been probably a three hour torture movie about that kid being tortured by him just getting all the like Sid's toys

and that fucking stupid poor kid that's always running shit fucking I don't know honestly all the characters I just know that Oh, the characters except Santa Claus. Well, Santa Claus, you barely even see him in that movie. I know. That's one of my major complaints of the movie. Thank God.

That's a bittersweet moment in that movie, by the way, when you see Santa. Because it's this disappointment of like, yeah, okay, so he's like five other characters? Yeah. Tom Hanks' is Santa in that as well. Yeah, dude, he's everybody. He's damn everything. Tom Hanks is the conductor or whatever bullshit. Why did he pick that movie to be like, I'm going to go all out?

Check it out. Look what I can do. I got rain. Yeah. I can be myself. and Santa Claus. What other movie did he did that? Norbit.

Not Norbit. White Norbit. White Norbit. When does that get in the public domain? We got to make white orbit this year. White Norbit for cream. Okay. All right.

We'll circle back to that for light, white, and refreshing. It's called Cloud Atlas. That's what it was. Oh, yeah. But everybody did that. Yeah. That's true. It wasn't just, but he did like, he got that because of Polar Express.

Yeah, I was going to just about to ask that. The Wachowski's were like. You think you did how they were like, all right, we saw you be Santa, we saw you be a hobo, we saw you be a conductor. So now please be a Korean person right now. He was Korean in that? Put tape on your eyes. I thought that was one of those movies where they, in their idea of the future is somebody has like a stripe on their eye. Yeah, but I think they also made them Asian.

Oh, okay. If I'm not mistaken. What the hell? What the fuck was that, boy? I guess I was going to play a sound, but I guess Julio set a timer for us. Thank you, Julio. Thank you, Julio. That's really scary.

Could you turn it off? That was scary. Okay, so we're moving. We've completed our first chocolate. So let's just go right into cream. Right into cream. So I see. First, first, white in orbit.

Let's get back to that. Oh, wait, that was perfect. Yeah, perfect transition. White Norbit. See, this is so good. Who would you pick to be white in orbit? John Heater. Wow.

Has he done anything in recent years? This is his comeback. Does John Heater really have the range that Norbert? Norbert is the range. Dynamite. Norbit. Andy Circus. Andy Circus would be amazing. That would be way better.

I was really excited about this idea of them crossing movies. But no, Andy Circus being white in orbit. That would be a really, really good idea. White Norbit. Fatty. Well, Resbush is fatty. Yeah, but I'm just saying it's the themes are coming together. No, he played an Asian guy in that too.

I was like, he also played a white guy. I know he didn't. He played an Asian guy. You really have an almost encyclopedic knowledge of non-Asian actors playing Asian people in films. No, I have a cycletic knowledge of Norbett. You, have you seen it? Yeah.

Really? Yeah. What happens in the movie? So, Norbitt is a nerd. This is not cream filled. Why is, wait, why is Norbert not cream filled? Well, can you apply this? Yeah.

I get up the fattie. If you want me to talk about Raspusia. Okay. Yeah, we can do Rispucia. Yeah, she jumps in the, she jumps off the diving board and it's really funny. That is funny. That is a great scene. But the water's refreshing.

And Norbid is whipped. Oh, shit. And his center is weak. He has a weak center. What's that mean? His soul. His soul is weak. He's a very nebish person. And he's looking to, he's looking for love to filling him. Okay. And he knows.

Yeah, it kind of ends there at light slash white, doesn't it? He wishes he was smooth. Okay. Norbert wishes he was smooth. He's got white teeth. milky white teeth. Well, you could have taken white off the board. And Respecia is looking creamy

in her bathing suit. She does look creamy. And what about the last one? The ending is refreshing. The ending is refreshing because... The last one? Yeah, light and white. I'm trying to think...

The last one. Oh, wait. Oh, it with cows milk, Respecia got them titties. Okay. Respecia got them big ass tities like a cow. Yeah, they are. I feel like we should like...

We should like make... We should talk like cream. We're acting like sweet hyper chocolate right now. Yeah. Cream is a little. I really want to get this record. It's like when you eat, when I cream, I'm like, ah. When you eat cream or when you, did you say when I?

When I say when I cream or do you say when I eat cream? Yeah, when I eat cream, I'm like, but you didn't say when I eat cream, I'm like, I'm like, it's like smooth and white. I feel like it's air bubbles that make it so fluffy. That's what you're thinking of, you're thinking of Kinder Arrow. What's this? This is a chocolate filled with air. No, I'm not thinking about chocolate at all.

Cryptophobes, beware. This chocolate full of air. That's really good. When, never mind. It's disgusting. What? Come on, man. Just say it.

We need cream. We have 20 minutes of cream. Is the cream? that's on or in a woman's vagina. Okay. I'm going to let you say it, but go on. Is that almost? Tread lightly.

I am. Is that a booger? Okay. Thank you for asking. Is it kind of a boer? Thank you for asking, Caleb. Yeah. Now.

Yeah, I can't say that I have an answer for you. I think I have an answer, which is. Technically. I think technically it is. A man's cream is very boogery. Also, cream is not... Algae boogies. Cream is not an accurate description of semen.

No, semen is not cream. And people make cream jokes about semen. Cream... I just say sperm usually. Ejaculate. Ejaculate. I usually stick to sperm or ejaculate. I'm about the sperm.

I say my wet hot. cream can be so much. I mean, that's one of the most incredible things on our planet. You really are creamed out right. I'm trying. I'm trying. You're riding the waves. Because I'm worried, I'm worried that we're going to get, I'm worried we're going to get

a phone call. From Guinness. From Guinness. Oh, talk about creamer. Oh. The Guinness may have been born out of beer. Yeah. That's completely true. Yeah. That's a cream growing down. I'm going to get a call. They're going to say, you know, you talked

about the topics, but you didn't weren't. The audio was infused. infused. We're an acting creamy. I'd be like, why are you being creamy on the phone right now?

Yeah, do we have to start talking about because I'm setting the record right now. No! I'm recording this phone call right now

and I'm making it the creamies podcast you ever. This is a creamy prank call. It's a new style of prank call called a cream call where you call somebody

and you add creamy on the phone. You'll be fat. and refreshing. Try it out. You call the pizza place and you say, Cream prank call Alice right now.

Why don't we call someone all creamy like? Cream prank call Alex for us right now. Yeah. Call him from the Google voice number. He doesn't have that saved.

Dude, just, well, people don't answer a star 69 anymore, huh? No, no,

no, no. I don't know if he'll pick up. He's probably busy as fuck right now. I know he is not busy. I know he's not too. He's definitely going to answer. Because I want to see

how a cream call is done by the master and inventor of the cream call. So I just opened up his contact, and I've seen that I, at some point, said his address as Dr. Crazy's lab. It says that about his name. All right. Never noticed that before.

All right, I'll call him right now. Okay. And if he doesn't answer, you leave him a creamy voicemail. Yeah. Is this on, is this on your regular phone? Your regular number, are you calling from the Google voice? It's my number. Yeah, we'll call him.

Open up Google Voice and call. He can call from my phone. Whoa. He might be at the open mic, honestly. The open mic, dude. Wait, it's pretty late, actually. Yeah. What time is it?

Yeah, this is around the time. Hi, this is Alex Fores. I can't come with the phone right now. I'll leave a message, and I will call you back. All right. Hey, Alex. You've been creamed. Keep going.

This is a called a cream call. Okay, explain them what it is. So we're doing a cream-filled episode, so I'm calling to be extra creamy, but you didn't pick up. So. Get, make your voice deeper. Say, keep it creamy. Keep it creamy. and sign off by saying.

Signing off. Mr. Cream. Mr. Cream. That was, I think, pretty good. He's going to be delighted. He was going to be so excited to get that. Because you know what's so amazing is when you get in a pastry and you think it's just some normal fucking shit.

Just a ball. Bighted in. Bals. We bite into it. Pure creamed. Cramed. So he's going to take his phone. He hates his phone. He's going to pick up his phone.

Fucking stupid phone. A normal. I've hooked up voicemail, and all of a sudden a cream call. A normal rich, bittersweet, dark, delicious, decadent call. Yeah. Wait a second. This call is actually loki, smooth, fatty, whipped, center, and filling. I've been creamed.

Not to mention light, white, refreshing and it woke cows milk. It woke cows milk. I think that was really close to getting the epitome of the cream filled. The cream, cream. Cream. Cream. I think we've got to talk like this for the rest of it. Sing the cream song.

The cream. Like this With black curtains Just cut the black curtains With light white curtains It's refreshing And the fatty Cinter filling

It's refreshing Bring it in there A cream in this milk Where my smooth cow is in this milk with my light white center

that's filling banana yeah that's good my light white center my 20 minutes of cream this is going to do this is a bit

you know what if we did do but it is it's fucking cream we did an Oreo I think they're all the same size but it would be Let's talk Oreo for a moment. Let's touch on it. It's an Oreo filled with something. Cream, which I think is a pretty close to cream.

But it's not the same. It's different. It's different. It's not, you know, it's less... Oh, wait, you know what it is cream filled? What are they called? Yeah. I don't know.

Yeah. The other Oreos. The other kind. Oxies, oxies. Hydrox. Hydrox. Cookies. Because they don't have...

Those are for real cream? Well, they don't have... have a, they don't have a, because cream C-R-E-M-E, I believe, is like a, oh, it's a trademark. Some kind of trademark. Well, they call it stuff now. Yeah.

Oh, yeah, true. Wait, that's not even close to fucking cream. Yeah, they call stuff. St-U-F. That's, I'm not eating shit with stuff in it. Yeah. If stuff is one of the ingredients. I've seen that movie, the stuff.

I know what happens when you eat stuff. I know. What are you talking about the substance? No, no, no, no. Bro doesn't, bro doesn't know the stuff. Is it like the substance? Yeah. But it's called the stuff?

It's a hell of it. What's different about it? It's about the stuff. It's about the stuff. Basically, and I'm going to tell you this, and you're going to think I'm saying it in a funny way. But they find some stuff in a rock, and they all eat it in the whole world.

They sell it as ice cream. And people's faces start to melt. I do think you're being funny, because that sounds like an absurd idea for a movie. And I'm not sure any studio in history would say yes to that pitch. Well, buddy, welcome to the 80s. Welcome to... Cocaine was running wild.

Larry Cohen. Who's that? He wrote and directed it. Or I think he at least directed it. Is he talented or just some fucking new. What else has he done? Anything creamy? He did.

He did Q the Wing Serpent. He did. He did Black Caesar. He did. It's alive. Black cream. It's alive. Could be.

It's a white cream. It's a white. Well, that one is about a little baby. And how does a baby get mad? Well, not cream. We already established it. We think it's not. Sperm isn't cream, but a woman can cream during sex.

Well, I guess like a mom. a cupcake baby cream up on the dick man dude cream up on that dick get creamy on that fucking dick for me bitch

why wouldn't oh anyway back to what I said a great idea Anthony yeah yeah wait hold on let me see if I can find the text that he sent me this is kind of creamery

you told somebody that we were doing a cream filled episode no no he just sent me this at one in the morning if somebody scoops us on this I'm going to fucking kill myself He said, idea for pal, you guys all record your best attempt at a J-O-I video and then review each other's on the podcast. That's actually a pretty creamy. That's a pretty creamy idea. It's actually a pretty creamy idea.

But I'm going to be honest, I don't think I've ever watched one of those videos. Yeah. No, it's, what's the point? I tried ones and I was like, just don't tell me what to do. Yeah. No. Don't tell me what to fucking do. You're not my fucking. Well, for me, I'm just like, oh, I got to put my headphones, I got turned up, or I got

I put the subtitles on. A lot of times they don't encode the subtitles aren't there. I don't know. It's like, I have like audiovisual processing. I mean,

just too much Netflix. I'm not going to be able to. It's just one of those things. I wear the subtitles on every porn video I watch. Oh, oh, oh, oh,

oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Ow. It's blow job noise. Blow jobs. Asterisk. Blow job asterisk. I'm actually, I actually,

I've been leading a movement with me and some other guys that I met on, on con men sections. Yeah. actually we create dot SRT files for a bunch of the most popular porn videos of the month

we go back and we go through them we saw it here's an idea we had a bunch of guys who work for Amazon Prime you could call yourself the cream boys oh we don't call ourselves that we could what do you guys call yourselves we call ourselves the porn subtitlers it's extraordinary see this is a better name of extraordinary

subtitlers this is a better name the cream boys I'll pick you about it the thing guys I know it seems it's going to the center of the body them third. They're light and white.

And I will pitch that because I know, and I know you, this might surprise you, but I'm not the leader. I'm actually. Really? Because I know I'm such a, just a, you're natural, I'm an alpha. Yeah. But I'm, I'm one of the lower level. You made it sound like you were the one that started the group when you said that.

No, I was, they, they scouted me. Oh, so you're like the young buck. Yeah. You were in the comments saying, it's actually one of the, here is my, one of the videos I'm working on right now. Yeah. You were in a comment in a video. Group scouts, young buck.

Yeah. The group of extraordinary guys scouts young buck. Interesting. In the comments of a porn video just saying like, and here's my WPM. But yeah, we drop the Google Drive link in. So if you see any,

if you're ever on a porn hub or X video, a comment section, you see a link to a download. You just go ahead and click that because that's going to be from me or one of my buds. We put that together for you. And then you can open that bad boy up in VLC.

VLC. And then now you've got subtitles. That's great. It's great. Because then you can really watch it when somebody's asleep in your house. Uh-huh. Or even if you just, like me, you just have trouble understanding what people are saying sometimes. You know, Christmas, you're in your childhood bedroom.

You got your projector. Yeah. Well, I feel like sometimes watching these porn videos, I feel like, you know, Christopher Nolan makes the damn audio. Yeah, yeah. Too damn loud. Speaking of audio, we're doing an audio that's mixed with chocolate and cream. Yeah. So I just thought of that.

Audio mix is kind of interesting. There should be, there should be like a plug-in for like Dawes, right? That's just like, do you want. this chocolatey or do you want this creamy that's a good idea like a saturator like a guitar pedal yeah yeah yeah oh and it could be

like an expression pedal for a guitar right so it's like all the way down yeah that's cream all the way up that's chocolate and there's a no no no no no no spectrum all the way up that's chocolate all the way down that's chocolate oh in the middle and the really good guitar players

who are also excellent drivers can just ride that middle cream all that yeah yeah yeah That is, I've heard that a lot of members of my bloody Valentine is to practice before concerts by driving 10 cars at once. Really? Yeah, they would get into 10 driver's seats of the same. That's how they get. I would hate to see their fucking, you know what?

They were doing 10 different driver seats, and that's what inspired the, we, way, way, way. That would be so sick if you got in that guy's car and he had fucking 40 pedals in his car. He drives. Oh, shit. Sorry, officer, I'm Kevin from my buddy on time.

The officer pulls up, but Kevin Shields and rolls down it. Is that his name of Kevin Shields? Yeah, he rolls down his window and he goes, Mm-hmm. Sorry, no, you know how fast you were going? Presses the pedal that unbuckles a seatbelt. Presses the pedal that opens up the glove compartment. Yeah.

Kevin Shields pulls out again. The drums from A little bit of music Music section Yeah, cream is a band Cream is a band And is it not also a magazine It is a magazine, cream magazine

There it is. Rock and roll magazine Speaking of, well, he's Krem But the band 10CC One of the members It was named a lall Krem LOL Krem Really? So he would like this

Because he would like this yeah he laughs in the face of crem we like cream he went on to later make a group with the other guy from ten cc called godly and crem they should have called it chocolatey and crem that would have been a better name you really think it would have been better or just more it would have more sense would have more sense it would be more in line with our podcast episode that's true it would have given us one more chocolatey and cream chocolatey and crem they didn't really have any hits so I can't really make any jokes about it yeah I am

Oh, your name. Chocolty Pits? I've been going by that for a couple years. Not with you guys with another group. Your other group, yeah. I'm in a group of, we still, I have a newspaper route that I do. And with that as my other job. And those guys, I had no idea.

We all had so many side hustles. Yeah, those guys call me Chocolty. Did you ask to me call that? Or there was something you did? You know what? It was something I did, but I'm not going to tell you what it was. Wait to tell us until we roll out of the time. We got section.

And guys, we're kind of close. As well, again, we got a few minutes left, so I think we just need to be extra creamy and push it over the finish. You know, what's so crazy, I've been, at every single point, I've almost transitioned at the perfect time. I know. It's natural. Yeah. Because we're talking about to get back into chocolatey things. Oh, my God.

It's like a big DJ button. It's like a big DJ button. What's that thing called? A knob, you motherfucker. I'm being a fucking knob. You are being a knob. I'm not knowing it. Shut up.

I'm a fucking knob. Nothing feels better than cream. Just want to throw that in. That's there. Just in case anyone's skipping around. Sun cream or no, sunscreen. Suncream is a lot different. What kind of cream?

Sun cream oil. What is that supposed to be sun cream oil? I think I was thinking sun cream oil, but then I was going to sunscreen oil, which is not, yeah. I've never heard it called sunscreen oil. Do you put cream on your face before bed, any sort of skin care? A shower, I'll put on shoot. You use a retinal? I got it for free.

He used an all? Yeah, he's an all. Oh, mine is actually called, has a cream name. I don't remember the name, but it has cream and the name. Cameron's Crevee cream. No, it's not that. It's something I got off Amazon, the cheapest thing on Amazon. I'm not going to spend a lot of money on it.

I went to Costco and I got a three pack of Sarave cream. That's smart. They, these girlfriends love to put creams on your faces. Does y'all's girls got the miscellar water? Yep. That shit fucking smells like fucking peat. It smells crazy. My wife keeps trying to trim my eyebrows because they're going into my eyes. Dude, they're going to growing into your eyes.

My eyebrows are really long. Like an overgrown goats horn. You want to see how long they are? Your eyebrows are not long enough to go into your eyes. You don't have a bushy. I do. I have a few eyebrow hairs that are going into my eyes. You should come in with like really like overplucked morticia eyebrows.

Well, that's what I'm saying. I can't trust anybody on earth to. You trust me. Mess with my eyebrows. Yeah, come on. Trust him. Let him do. Morticia you up.

Let's Yale Gomez Motishu. As I get older, I'm getting more I'm doing something, and then a crazy tweezer enters my life and plucks a hair out of the front of my face. Yeah, this happens a lot. This is a rude thing like girls think is okay.

Do they do that to each other? No. They do it to themselves, so they think that... We already moved on, I think. Well, but now this has been at this... This is more of a reminder to start chocolate. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, so guys, cream is over.

We finished. We filled. Finish cream. So, well, we put cream in, but it's not filled. It's not filled. Yeah, it's an open-based sandwich. Right now, it's just a fucking piece of chocolate with cream hit in the table. And nobody wants that under it.

A cream toast, chocolate toast with it. An open, butterside, down. Okay, so let's talk chocolate here for a moment. We got, we're trying to go, we're going last four, which is delicious, decadent, South American, and Bean from, it was made from. South American is the easy start. Yeah, we had a challenge. We left the challenging. part for less. This one, I mean, delicious and

Deccanin and is easy. South American, I think, it's pretty easy. Yeah. Because you can say well, these two, what we do is we chunk them up. We talk about a South American dish that has beans in it. Or just, I mean, the chocolate's beans come from South America. Oh, yeah, that's true. Yeah. Cacao beans.

Cacao beans. I was at a place where they made chocolate. Where? The one by the Cozy Corner? No, a real place in the Caribbean. Oh. And I smelled it every day. Did it smell like chocolate?

No, it smells, well, it smells a little like chocolate, but it's like fruity. It's like kind of fermenting. Oh, yeah, because chocolate is fermented. It's from, it's bean, they ferment the beans or whatever. And there was a lot of roosters. There's a guy down the street by Cozy Corner, the Ridgewood chocolate guy. Yeah, this guy is kind of a nut. This guy has a very, very big belly.

He is a neighborhood. He is a neighborhood. He has a, have we talked about this guy before? I know. I think I maybe. This is a chocolate store in our neighborhood. that is called Ridgewood Chocolate or something. And he claims that it can cure diabetes.

It has a bunch of signs that are like, chocolate is not candy. He's kind of like, what's the name is the Stevia guy? Yeah, Dan Quinn. He's like Dan Quinn, but about chocolate. This is a perfect guy to talk about for this. Let me tell you about the time I went there.

So I went there. If anybody thinks candy or chocolate is candy, it's his motherfucker. I listened to his signs. Really? I read the signs and I was like, well, I should go in and learn about this guy making chocolate. Okay. If it cures diabetes, so be it.

So be it. I was just here to eat it anyway. I went there with my girlfriend and he is showing us how to eat the chocolate and everything. He's telling us like this is a different. Is there a technique? He's saying that this is a different kind of chocolate. You should definitely savor this. Don't eat it like a regular candy bar.

And guess why he's saying that because it's $10 a bar. Yeah. But it's this a big. It's literally this big. Yeah. And in the middle of all of the spiel, he looks at us and he goes, and you know it's an aphrodisiac. Wow.

And I got turned on. I had to leave. Really? Because I was imagining him eating me chocolate. Imagining him feeding me chocolate. He told me that the best way to eat his chocolate is with his fingers. His finger put in my butt. No, that's not.

It's a chocolate suppository. Actually, it's really, I'm serious when I say it's not like other chocolate. You actually have to put it in your ass. Well, it actually, now that I'd say it, it is actually exactly like other chocolate. It's just what you do with it. It's different. But this is Hershey's. He said to break off a corner piece and then put it on your tongue and let it melt.

What if you're out of corners? There's only four. Dude, were you tripping? Yeah, dude. Put the chocolate in your tongue. This is going to cure my fucking diabetes. If I have it. I don't know if I have it or not.

I could have it. I ate a lot of candy in my life. I don't think that gives you diabetes. Eating chocolate? Is you type 2. Type 2. Type 2. Type 2 in chat if you think Patrick has diabetes.

Do, too, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, too, too, too, do, do, do, do, too, too good. Yeah. I'd be surprised if you had diabetes. Yeah, I probably won't have it. I'm too good. Probably won't. I'm too good with this shit. I think you're too good to die.

Yeah. Let's get really chocolatey. Yeah. Let's get fucking decadent, man. Let's get extremely decadent. Yeah. Dude, I mean... I'm fucking savory today.

I want to be a whole meal. Or I want to get served one. I want to be overserved. Yeah, I want to be over served. I'd be interested in being over served. Yeah, I want to get overserved, but not from alcohol, but from roast duck. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Where the manager's all like, you should have known that that guy had enough roasted duck and fesson. My friends, Kai and Emmett were in town, shout out. We went to a Thai restaurant and we all ordered a dish called Heavenly Duck. The same was that we said, and we in a circle like, can I do the Heavenly Duck? I'm actually also going to do the Heavenly Duck. Yeah, I think it'll add a third Heavenly Duck. How big was it? It was just duck.

It wasn't a whole duck. It was just ducked. Why haven't we just been decadent and just gone somewhere and eaten a full duck? Dude, I would love nothing more. I fucking love Duck so much. We should really do that. We should go to China Town. night we're having duck night okay yeah I fucking love

wait wait what if we just combine the two and it's like liquor and duck evening yeah liquor and duck night it's no not night that's an evening evening evening an evening of duck and liquor dude this literally sounds like my fucking heaven yeah I love the sound of that is decadent that yeah and delicious an evening of duck in South America it's called it's called it's called consider China to be in South America and they eat a lot of duck there it is called it's called decadence an evening of duck and liquor wow wow can we get a poster made yeah yeah oh my decadence and evening of duck and liquor so please join me really small text at the top please join us for a night of decadence mm-hmm an evening

of duck and liquor party full and there's so many different places to get duck and liquor yeah we have to do the decadence and evening we all we all come in here we have like three roasted ducks and you know what we're listening to too too da-na-na-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da we all all we're sitting tux and white gloves yeah oh my god wow eating gloves yeah we take off our walking that would be so delicious as well duck and liquor chocolate duck well no we're just saying I'm just saying it dude you don't have to yeah we don't have to pry it out there

That's just the kind of thing that pisses me off. Just when I say chocolate duck. Well, just when you kind of try to, like, I feel like we're having such a chocolatey conversation. I'm just so worried that it's not going to read as chocolate. That was an extremely chocolatey conversation. We were hitting almost everything there. And then you had to just be so. Duck made from beans.

I always say, keep going. Keep saying what you're saying. I'm not kidding. I just vomited in my mouth. Duck made from beans. Just at how you're acting. Me? Yeah.

Yeah. Okay. All right. I'll dial it back. Because we really got to stick the landing on this. If you have any hopes of actually breaking this record. Beans from it was made from. Okay.

Let's just start spitballing. Beans from it was made from. Beans from it was made. I'm so scared of what Alex is going to say to me when here's what I said to him. Why? Because I made a porn call on his voice mail. It wasn't a creamy call, bro. Creamy call.

You said, hey, this is a cream call. It's like eight minutes long. That wasn't eight. It was like 90 seconds. It's pretty long. It feels long when you make a cream call. Anyway, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

We're not talking to cream anymore. Wait, let's call him back and let's do a chocolate call. You can do a chocolate call. No, I'm not calling it back. Okay, you call. Are you already, you volunteered him. Okay. And you have to do a chocolate call.

Oh, yeah, call Neil. He'll love the chocolate call. Wait, how do I go? about it, because the cream I mean, I think for the chocolate call you can use, you can use all the adjectives if you want. This is a chocolate call. This is a chocolate call?

We're recording. No, don't tell them they're recording. This is a chocolate. I'm going to call him from the Google Voice. He's not going to answer, dude. He'll answer. Trust me. He's not going to know. He's not going to know to answer that.

Trust me. He will, all right, never mind. Okay, surely we'll get an answer here. He might be at the open mic too. What did you say? Hello? This is a chocolate call. What?

What the fuck you're talking about? I'm being decadent. I can't. Just say what you got to say. Say B bean from it was Oh, and I'm being South American and bean from it was made from Oh no, what happened? What's going on?

Say delicious. This is a delicious call. And it's dark and delicious. I'm in it's dark and delicious. I'm so very rich. Not telling him he's been chocolate called You've been chocolate called You've just been chocolate called, bro

You've just been chocolate called How does it feel? Aw All right, well, that was a chocolate call I honestly think I prefer The cream call To the chocolate call The chocolate call is very

I mean you have to be rich and decadent Well, you kind of, you tried to figure out what a chocolate call was. Well, now that we know what it is, now that we know it is, why don't you call someone? We still don't know what it is. Yeah, I don't think we know what it is. I think, all right, well, let's spend the last couple of minutes trying to figure it out. Let's figure out a chocolate call, and then we'll make a chocolate call. So a cream call is more.

You have to sound rich. That's what I was trying to do. Rich. Rich. Rich. Oh, I started talking like this is like a rich man. Hello. What is that?

That's the timer. That is so fucking scary to me. It's scary to me so bad. We're not done until we make the second chocolate call. Yeah, we need to stick the land. Okay, so the chocolate call would be... So you act rich and bitter... And the call has to be bittersweet.

Oh, give them bad news. Yeah, yeah, bittersweet by saying so... I'm not saying somebody died. Hello, somebody died. But say that they came into a large inheritance. Oh, rich. Yeah. You have died, but you've come into a large inheritance.

What should I call? I don't know. Joe? Okay, I'll call Joe. Maybe, maybe not Joe I don't know, I think he won't pick up Wait, let me look through my Yeah

Who do I have And be South American as well I have some really funny ones I could do But Like who? I am not going to This is what I think He would wait

He would love a chocolate call He would love a chocolate call He would He would love a chocolate call it more than anyone that's a shit is it willie wanka pretty close it's willie wonka you're saying it it's okay i i don't need to know who should i call i know i think i got a call i think i got a call jo it just makes sense wait wait wait wait brian call brian we're he's on a plane we're keeping it in the in the family we'll keep it in the family and you i want to this

it's called it be fucking chocolate yeah be as chocolate as possible Really chocolate. If he doesn't pick up, we got to call someone else. Dude. Come on, Joe. Your call has been forwarded to voicemails. He's going to say it's phone number. Oh, no.

Hello. Good news and bad news. The good news is you've come into a lot of money. The bad news is somebody very close to you has passed away. And they were dark. You're flying down to South. We're going to get you a ticket to South America. We're getting you a ticket to South America.

To South America. To go on a. food tour. A delicious and decadent. A delicious and decadent food tour. Of duck and liquor. A night of duck and liquor called decadence. A South American experience.

We will be serving beans. So have a wonderful time. So you've just been chocolate called. You've just been chocolate called. You've just been chocolate called. It's a new kind of call that has recently been invented as part of a record-breaking episode of a podcast. Congratulations. And I wish you the best with the situation that I laid out for you.

Goodbye, Joe. Wow. Okay, so that's two chocolate calls and a cream call. That's the perfect amount. I think that's a perfect amount. I think I was the only one who got someone to pick up. I know. If everyone hates me and Caleb.

Yeah, they screen our damn calls. I bet you called Jolie fucking answer right away. I'll call them right now. Dude, you'll imbalance the chocolate and cream ratio. We already have two chocolates in the cream. Dude, you're going to make it not be a sandwich anymore. Yeah. If I call, if we call more people, then I'm going to have to,

then we're going to have to do another couple of calls. It's just going to be so unwieldy and it's going to confuse Guinness. It's going to confuse Guinness. You can't, a chocolate-filled thing is not double-decker. This episode, if we're still trying to be cream-filled, yes we are we accidentally stumbled upon something even greater what was that this is the first podcast to feature

three new types of prank calls two new types of prank calls it's the first cream filled so okay if we can't get the first cream filled episode yeah it has to be the first cream filled episode to feature two new types of prank calls yeah and two of one of them and one of the other as well yeah that will be in the

award yeah we get. It's got to be in the reward. Okay, so let's go ahead and order an engraving. Yeah, I think we can go ahead and do that. We'll submit this to the Guinness book. I'm sure that somebody who listens to this works there. It seems like the type of job that you guys might have.

A good job, you mean. Great job. That's the best job in the other than that. So just go ahead and set everything in motion. Here's an idea. Here's an idea. If Guinness doesn't reach out to us, I still think we get it. Let's reach out to them.

We get a, we get, unfortunately, a participation trophy for this. I will be reaching out to Guinness. I will be, I will be, once this comes out, I will send this to. I think we should put a whoope pie in resin in a cube. And that's cool. And then keep that in the middle of the table forever. I'd really be mad to not be able to eat it. First cream filled podcast episode.

We got it. We got it. We got it. We did it. We got it. We got it. Let's take a big ass bite. Dude, let's do it.

We should have had whoopie pies on standby. Well, we didn't even know we were doing a look-in-like-tie. See, this is kind of, we can see... Yeah, fuck visuals. We can see here the idea came to fruition as part of the podcast itself. You can see the full development, and that's why nobody is doing it like us. Straight up. First cream-filled podcast to feature figuring out how to make it.

Yeah. All right. Now go out and make your own cream-filled episodes. No, don't. They won't be the first. Oh, yeah. It doesn't matter if you do it. You guys can take second, third, whatever.

whoever you want. Yeah, that's second and third. Because we got the first one. We fucking did it. And you know what? It was great. And you know what?

It's 100 degrees out today. And this episode has nothing to do with that. Get out. Get out and vote. So get out there and vote. It's over. It's over. It's over.

You fucking missed it. All right. Let's get Gus. He's waiting outside. Oh, really? Yeah. Okay. Okay.

Okay, so how many verses would you say? I don't know. Well, you listen to the song at least four times. Yeah, I didn't beg you to play the song. Yeah. I think we're coming up to it. He's got to be the bridge. Yep.

Thank you, Mr. DJ for playing my song. Thank you, thank you. I've been waiting so long. I listen to that song a lot. Because I'm planning to depart the earth quite soon. I really don't like that. And I'm planning to take one person in this room with me. I don't like that you're planning to depart the earth, but as your friend, I will let you do that.

Thank you. As your friend, I respect your decision. Which one of us do you? I wish more people would say that to their friends who are planning to depart the earth. Which one of us three do you think is the most workplace shooting, mass shooting risk? To get somebody to shoot up the place? To come here and just shoot the other two. Here?

Yeah. I don't know. Of us three. I feel like that's a... It's between me and Cam. Because you're here too much. Yeah, I'm just here all the time. If you wanted to shoot it up, you'd just do it.

Yeah, you're going to be the person who gets shot. Yeah, you're the one victim. Yeah. I'm the one that dies. Yeah, because you're going to be two shots, but I'm the one that dies. The only person that's here. Yeah, yeah.

Whichever one of us comes in to shoot up, the other one is not going to be here. So you're thinking that you're thinking that you guys would come in and shoot like you one day you snap and you come to here to shoot it up. You guys so you guys come in here and shake a place up.

Hey guys. You guys come in here and shoot it up but there's like a possibility that I'm not here so you just do a workplace shooting to no one. You come in here and just shoot a costume. Well, we would shoot your favorite costume though. And you're bad and your pewter

and your MIDI controller. Oh yeah. I would shoot that. I would shoot your computer.