Podcast About List - Ep. 353 - Talkin' Box with "Walk'Em Down" JG

Episode Date: August 27, 2025

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He's the most edgiest person of any podcast I've ever heard of. I know, he just lets it fly. Yeah, you are. You wouldn't believe what slips in between the edits when we cut, when we have Julio cut out like two or three minutes and just cut together to a part so it's completely imperceptible. It's me saying stuff about Joe. No. That's the worst cuss word you think you've ever said.

The guys on my travel baseball team growing up used to call me Kagon. What does that mean? Julio, can we get a what does that mean? Can we get a translation? Get a what is that mean? What does Kagon mean? That's a lot of confidence for one second in. Yeah.

I'm guessing on somebody's episode. Yeah. Is he really not supposed to say that? I think it means the shitter. Yeah, it's just the shitter. Oh. The shitter like somebody's title or a toilet. They were calling him toilet?

You're like you shit a lot, basically. Wait, what is it again? Cagon Cagon It's meant It's meant to like Be used as like You're either you're a coward

Or you're annoying Yeah I mean I was You guys are Wait I was well aware that they're an annoying coward They didn't like You shit a lot

You're annoying and you're a coward Yeah trifecta for sure Is it Brian that You used to have like food service jobs And in every food service job he had All the Mexican guys would meow every time he walked in the room. Oh, yeah.

Why? I don't know what that is. Did they think that he looks like a cat? No, but he had multiple food service jobs where he worked with a bunch of Mexican guys in a kitchen. And every time he walked in, they'd start going, meow.

It's a good joke. And I really want to know what that means. Dude, yeah. I think, I think, you know, now that I'm thinking about it, I think Brian does have some very feline features. I think you have feline features. You think that I do?

You are a Cheshire cat? I could see that. I can see that. I don't deny it. We already established I'm the mole, though. What else are there? I could see you. The mole was good.

The mole is good. I could see you as a caterpillar. That's really like that. But Brian, I could see, dude, if we put like some fur on him, I could see Brian being like a kajit. Oh, yeah. I think anyone would look like a kajit if he put some fur on. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no. But it would be a very minimal amount of fur we could make Brian look like the cash.

I actually know the cat people from Skyron. Oh, yeah. You know that. He sounded like he didn't. Because I was at a sleepover once and you could design characters in the game. And he calls it design. At your sleepover, you could design characters in the game? He calls it designing characters.

I was out of sleepover and you could. You are allowed to. You could design characters. Yeah. The character designing screen. It's create. It's create your character. The squid game is hitting Caleb crazy.

I've had a long day, man. Yeah. This is, I really cannot believe this. We're here sipping Squid Game because we're, we're celebrating the incredible launch. Season one of Joe Box. Podcasts about list. First official spin-off. Oh, that's yummy.

First official spin-off that has seen. Let's get the bottle over here. That has seen. We're not doing duck and liquor again, bro. Let's do duck and liquor again. That's the best episode we've ever. First officially sanctioned spinoff that wasn't just made by three guys. Weirdly without even signing.

official paperwork. Yeah. There was no official paperwork signed. Yeah, we signed the paperwork for Joe Buck. Yeah, yeah. Well, I mean, technically, we could,

we could, we could, uh, make up a contract that makes us full legal rights to Joe Box. How many points we could give us on Joe Box? We could. We really could. What is the,

we couldn't. Yeah, we could. We could define what a point is. We completely take over it. But yeah. Oh, just of the,

of all profit sharing and productivity. The gross, man. The net. The net. I'll give you guys points, man. I'm 99 points. I'm in it for the love of the game. I'll give you guys each couple points.

Are you fucking kidding me? Wait, we got a combined 6% share in Joe Box? Give me 20 points right now or I leak the winner. That's great. I'll give you a... I'll give you 20. I'm fine with that. I have nothing.

I would never even think of that. Give me 25 or I'll also leak the winner. It's not really a winner because it's more about the journey to get to the winner. I'll leak the jokes. I'll leak the entire journey. I remember the jokes. I remember everything I said. I'll say it really fast.

It's about the journey. It's not about the winner. So if you guys want to, but I'll give you 25 points. So you're going to do a... I get 20 and they get 25? I asked for 25. I'll give you 30. If he gets 30, I'm going to leak the...

If he leaks... If he leaks the error, if he gets 30, I am going to leak the winner. You just said you didn't care who leaks the winner. I'm going to leak Cameron's best joke. My best joke. I want to hear this. Can we let him leak my best joke? Yes.

What is it? Don't leak it, man. Yeah. Wait, no, I want to hear this. Tell him privately. Yeah. You'll just say it and we'll bleep it out after. Leak the best joke and I'll revoke all the points, but leak the best joke.

Cameron's best joke? Yeah. There wasn't any. or wasn't one what the fuck is that dude clearly had nothing in my why it's very disrespectful pathetic attempt to grab 30 percentage

points by the way you're down to zero and I can say that is a 30% not no no no no you're not a 30% motherfucker because I didn't do that shit I'll give you 10 yeah all right I'm happy with 30

I'm happy with 30 Caleb's I remember we'll write up the official hold up I can say Caleb's because I remember it's fresh in my mind what is it but you're not threatening anything telling me that I

he gets zero percent He gets 0% or else Or else I'm leaking his best joke He gets no percentage points I think that the people will enjoy The jokes in context more than It would be spoiled here Yeah, that's probably true

But the launch Has been a smashing success Yeah, dude You think so? Yeah, I feel that way That's interesting At least emotionally Oh, emotionally, yeah, I'm sure For you, for you, for me

It's a big hit, buddy. I'm happy. I'm happy. I'm happy. I'm happy. You're happy. We're happy. We'll see. I mean, it's all relative.

Where we live. Where we live. Not in the world of like inside out. Yeah. Not like the emotions are. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's a lot of, it's a lot of Amy Poehler up here right now. Phyllis is far in the back.

What's her real name? Phyllis. Joy? No, Phyllis. Sadness. Phyllis. Sadness's real name is not Phyllis. That woman has a name and I forget what it.

Her name is Phyllis. no her oh it is yeah dude they're all named the same shit as they are on the show except for yeah Oscar okay Oscar Kevin is not named that because Kevin's name is Brian Baumgartner it seemed like they had bigger creed is named creed Braden Angela is named Angela Martin that's different um meredith is not named Meredith though let's think let's think about this who else has their name Jim is not named Jim it's John Pam is named Jenna Fisher

Dwight is named Rayne Stanley is named Leslie But what the hell is Malora Harden is Jan Levinson Gould Leslie Jones Yeah Leslie Jones, yeah No, no, no, no, no.

It is Leslie, though, man. What's that about? It is Leslie. I may be mixed up two actors. Uh-huh. One sip of the fucking squid game, man. Okay. I had one sip, I had two sips of the squid game.

I had two shots of squid game. I wouldn't act like that after any amount of squid game. No, no, just saying. Straight up. I wouldn't act like that even if I was in the actual squid game. Hold up. You, I want to tell you, Joe, I've thought about this before. I don't think you would last a fucking second.

I would go the whole way, man. No, no. I watched the Mr. Beast games, and you know the part at the beginning where they have the tiles and the floors that just collapsed. And you would have been the first guy. It would have been at random. You would have been followed. Well, see, what I always thought with that is that those planks have to be on something. Yeah, you've thought about this before.

So I would just run along the thing that it's on. It's a great photo. Oh, you're talking about the glass things from the show. I'm talking about beast games, bro. Did you not watch Beast games? No, he did not. You didn't watch Beast games is your favorite show now. Dude, it's real life Fall Guys.

You would love, it is actually real life. But part of the fun with Fall Guys is that you get to control your own adventure with the running around. You get to control your own. You want to stand by that as a quote that you want tied to you for the rest of your life. Part of the fun of Fall Guys is you get to control your own adventure by running around. I think that on AZ quotes. On the box for Fall Guys. Control your own adventure

by running out. Have you guys? I've played plenty of fall ago. If you've played recently, you'll see that that's a pretty apt description of what you're doing in that game. You can do any? You can just... Do you think it's changed somehow since the time that we've played it?

It's changed a lot. But that when we played it, when we played it, you couldn't control your own adventure by running around? No, no, no, but I think that maybe it's not fresh in your mind. The thing that I remember that was really funny to me was Fall Guys related that Cameron said.

What was it? I can't say it. Oh, I remember that. Yeah. I still remember the text from Joe from two and a half years ago or whenever when you texted us, you were like, hey guys, in our big group chat,

you were like, guys, have you played Fall Guys? The characters are so funny. And I was like, oh, that's funny. And then I realize you were being serious. Well, it's a game. of Winston. Can you talk more about how much

Fall Guys you've played? Because I don't think you've ever talked about. Were you into Fall Guys when we lived together or no? No, I think I came to it in my current apartment. Yes.

I remember you telling me about Fall Guys because I didn't I didn't know that it was a big playing it on your big ass TV. Playing on my TV. Your TV is huge. It's very big and it's very close to the couch. I first played Fall Guys on a Nintendo

Switch and it's not built for the Switch. And then once a I played on a real console, I was like, I'm really good at this. Yeah. And there is a fun, like, so part of the fun is you get to, like, emote, and you can, like, put in your own, like, little dances and emotes that your character does. And you can dress up in outfits, so I would play with my friend a lot on duos, which is

the two-player mode. Yes. And we would be in two outfits that would be matching, but, uh, it'd be matching, but they'd be matching but a little different, like maybe a different color from one another. You know, he would be a green alien. I would be a red alien. It's fun.

When you say that you're good at it, though, you do realize this is a game entirely populated by children. Yeah, I'm aware of that. Okay. So does that... I'm not good at a lot of video games. So it's nice to play one where it's...

You were really good at Mario All-Star Baseball to a point that you kept books of the stats of your teams. That was a great game. That's the best baseball. Diddy Survivors? Yeah, I didn't use. You never played as the Diddy Survivors.

His bat was a little too short. Diddy Survivors? What? That's the name of Diddy's team in Mario All-Star Baseball. It's not a joke. I don't remember that, man. No, look at this load. Julio's pulling it up right now.

Look at the logo. It was literally, it was like, what, it's like Piranha Pete's team or whatever, and then literally it's fucking Diddy Survivors. I don't know why the fuck they, even back then even back then this doesn't make any sense

to call it the Dittie's that makes sense the Mario fireballs but the Ditty survivors makes sense Diddy survives all the jungle

hazards Yeah but what is survival have to do with baseball What does fireballs have to do with baseball Throwing a fireball Fastball so fast

It's more about Mario It's more about Mario Baseball's There isn't a whole lot of interesting stuff about Diddy Kong He has a gun That's true Yeah, his coconut gun, or no, the gunners.

He's a little, and he's not even his son. Diddy's gunners? No, he's not his son. He's a better name. No, he's his friend. He's his friend. Why would you have a friend who's that's? Julio, is his friend or is his cousin?

Julio knows this for sure. Cousins can be friends. Julio, explain to us the con family tree real quick. To the best of your ability, tell us the con family tree. He's either his friend or his cousin or he's either his friend or his cousin and his friend. Yeah, yeah. They're not, yeah. Cousin can be.

friend. I love it when my cousins. But friends, most cousins are friends, but not all friends are cousins. You're not close with your cousins like that? I am. No, you're not. Cousin Brian, my cousin Patrick. No. You don't. You don't count as any cousin. Nephew. They talk to us all the time.

Okay, so there's a, there's a parental relationship and a nephew and uncle. Who's his dad? Chunky. That's a good question, man. I don't know. I'm not an old grandpa Kong. No, cranky Kong was the original Donkey Kong. You know this? I didn't know this.

You know the Donkey Kong from when he's throwing barrels down at Mario from the older days? Yes, I am familiar. That Kong grew up to be cranky Kong. Did they do that after the factor was that original, like? Well, what do you mean because these games are years and years apart? Okay, I think what he means is, did the character actually age, or did they decide that later? I would say they decided it later. Why is the screen completely black?

That's what you look like. For quite a while. That's a good. I have no clue what happened. That's really good. And you know what sucks? We could have used that. Put that fucking TikTok sound, the

whoo, who, who, who, who put that under Cameron explaining the Kong family tree to us. I don't know the Kong family tree besides the best year ability. That'd be the best clip ever. Is you explaining Donkey Kong to us? I could try, but we don't have any more video whatsoever. I know, we're done with video. Whoa, the slow fan. What did you do?

You faded it out. He faded it out. You faded it out. Producer of the year, man. I love Julio. So do you want to do Walk him down, talk it down with

Walking him down JG? Talking Box with Walk him down JG. That's going to be your like bonus. So that'll be, yeah, that'll be on the Patreon. What episode does that come up in? Episode two.

Yes. Okay. So it hasn't released yet, which is not released yet and that's going to be coming out next week. So. What do you envision? And where is that coming out?

That's going to be on Patreon.com slash Joe Box. It's on Patreon? Yeah. Episode two? no no no no episode two is on youtube but yeah youtube dot com slash at joe gleason tv yeah it's hard to forget it's a i got the good username jo gleason tv yeah simple hard to forget yeah yep i've always been a first name last name guy and a tv at the end kind of guy and it i've also that that comes

with your name being yeah most joes are first name last name guys joe strummer yeah me and him Joe Paterno. Biden. Joe Paterno. Well, Biden sort of got a... I know you're real into being a Joe. Yeah. Y'all claim Paterno?

Well... That's a really good question, man. Thank you. It's a difficult landscape to to navigate. That's a yes. Because... Yes, he claims him.

I actually have some interesting stories. But you are navigating it. You have interesting stories about Joe Paterno? So I can't... No. How old are you? That timing might. actually um he was a i use a staple i wouldn't surprise me he was a staple of sports center

as a kid so i remember him as like the pen state guy i can't excuse his actions with uh you're not going to excuse them today looking to look into that camera right now and and denounce joe paterno for us and say you hate the ditty survivors let's go what you play the game can you release a statement just release a statement right now this is one statement just one statement i denounce joe paterno and his son his son and his silence oh i thought he said his son probably i think joe paterno and fuck yo son too i denounce joe paterno and his son for um their silence uh in the wake of the penn state um assistant coach scandal and the ditty survive and the ditty survive

I think that's get a clean take. I think that's You get a clean, okay, start from the top, let's get a very clean. I denounce the ditty survivors. This is actually, this is actually appropriate to this happening because Joe Box did start off as you guys trying to make me say raw shit as a joke. Oh, shit, shit.

You're trying to. I actually was trying to remember this the other day. What was the original joke going to be of Joe Box? We didn't even really ever get to that point. We just basically going to prank. It was for the, yeah, it was for the 12-hour episode, and we wanted, we were like, oh, we were just trying to brainstorm stuff. And I think we just thought of the phrase Joe Box, like, as a pun on Jackbox. And we thought that was funny.

And then we just were like, let's do a prank on Joe and make him read out stuff. But we never even got to the point of writing anything because we texting and said, well, you do Joe. And you got so excited and you texted us 24-7 for weeks. Yeah, that is true. And now, look what it's led to. I know, the best show ever. I've decided to, I've taken what started as a prank towards me and I've spun it into a positive. Which is what's so beautiful about this. Yeah. Because we were going to, we were going

to get like a lawyer and like a polygraph tester to come in. Do you remember? Oh, no, no, no. This was after the fact. We were, we were going to, because we thought that the voting or the, the, the, the judging system was unfair. So we're the next episode of Joe Box, we're going to have a, dude, you can't be talking too much about this. That's all I'm going to say. Although this is supposed to be talking box with Wagon MDG episode zero. Is this? Yeah. Well, either way, this topic I know does come up in the future episodes of us current season of Joe Box, so we should leave it.

By the way, all right, let's scrap what we were just talking about. Let's get a clean take of your denouncement of the deady survivors and Joe Patron. I understand you don't want to announce the ditty survivors because after all, they're just a video game team. What the hell is the point? So why would you just right now, just look into this camera and just say I denounce and then just say everybody that you denounce. and we can just assume you're just going to run down through the list and we can assume if you leave anybody off, then you're cool with

them. Yes. I'm going to stick with so just Joe Paterno is the only Okay, no, no, that's fine Barrett is named to add to the list. It's Joe Paterno and the Ditty Survivors. You don't have to tell us just just go ahead. Just

fire them off firing line right now. You're, you're, this is you denounce. This is your denouncement of every single bad person ever. Let's go. I denounce Joe Paterno Jerry Sandusky

Mm-hmm. Remember to name. Jared from Subway. Trump. Wow. Epstein. Nice. Maxwell. Just fire them off, man. No pauses.

Just all the people that you denounce. Well, see, I'm such a positive person that I'm usually not thinking about really horrible people. Hitler. There we go. Took him eight. It's crazy you started with Joe Paterno, by the way.

Well, that's what the lead-in was. Yeah. But this is my Joe Paterno thing. I, when I was playing baseball in high school, I would go to a gym. You're out of time. So you got,

there was a football player who was a former Penn State athlete. Yes. And he was really mad that they were vacating Joe Paterno's wins. Because he was like. So was Ashton Cuccher.

remember that, and now there's all conspiracies about Ashton Coucher trafficking women. I've seen the Ashton Coucher and yet you did not denounce him. Yeah, you could have denounced that and you didn't denounce him? I've seen the conspiracies. Here's how you did have done this. I denounce every evildoer

who in past, present, or future. Wow. And Superfuture. Do we have chimes or something? Play for that. That's good. This is to every evil doer. That's what I'll do to you No, it's a mega bullet

Bullet Bill I have them all lined up fucking take them all that at once Bullet Bill was such a disturbing character when I was a kid The dark history Anybody else think that That was a disturbing

Cool Bullet Bill shook me to my core And a chain chomp I imagine the life of a chain chomp The breeding was actually number one The breeding that must have led to this ball The chain chen champ can't be a happy The chain chomp is related to the bulletin it's the same like

black metal body well they both also sort of have the like like animalistic like one track mind sort of thing totally and also the forward the horrible agony of the thwomp always made me because they just smash them

their bodies all day and night they just smash do they ever give them like some a break or some food or like do they get to be? I don't even does Mario food. Yeah Yeah, he eats food, he's mushrooms. He doesn't really eat the mushrooms, guys.

He touches them. You got to watch the animated series. We're not talking about the animated series right now. He loves pizza, though. But we're, come on, the animated series is not canon. It's literally Super Mario. It's called Super Mario Bros. It's not happening.

He's not eating in the game. Yeah, so that's, yeah. But I think, isn't it implied that when you walk up to like a flower or a mushroom and it disappears? What else do you do with the wild? So does that mean he also eats the special shell that he gets? Yeah. No, because he holds it.

And he puts it on his head. The leaf. What is he doing with it? He's dead. The Tanuki leaf? He's eating that. You said, dooky leaf? Tanuki.

Oh, shit. Tanuki, bro. Dooky leaf. Damn, what kind of fucking Mario? I think he touches it and the magic power of the power up and enhances him. But then it disappears. Yeah. It fades away as it gets into it.

You can at least admit that he consumes it. The mushroom feels like an easy consumption. I guess his body consumes it. Yeah, the mushroom. The mushroom, he eats the mushroom. I'm more saying. I know, like, the little guy who flies down and says, one, two, three, go. Lucky too?

Yeah, I know he gets, like, to talk in some stuff. Uh-huh. But the bullet bills and the thwamps. I think a lot of them get to talk in different types of things. I've never seen it personally. The bullet bill ain't talking. But I feel like in, like, in, like, Paper Mario and stuff, they would be talking, right? Yeah, he's got, like, a bullet bill.

Oh, I could be that they be typing in that fucking game. Yeah. But they talk in any of the games? Yeah. In Mario Superstore baseball, they go like, Mario Odyssey, they got some talkers. No, that's typing too. Peach says the first thing.

She says, I baked you. Oh, well, Philip CDI. They're talking on that Hotel Mario. You're pulling out the stuff that doesn't. How so clearly outside of Pannon? From that Mario Odyssey game. Palatina? Paulina.

Oh, Paulina. Palatina is from Super Smash Brothers. Palatina. She's the angel with the wings. One of those scary, like, real people. No, Pauline, you're that you're talking about. Yeah, Mayor Pauline. That's kind of my number one

Super Smash Bros rule. If you use one of, like, the people. The Marth types. You're weird. Yeah. How do you feel about Mr. Gaman watch? He's not, I'm saying like a, you don't think he's a realistic looking person.

Any of the fire emblem people. Yeah. Yeah. I don't see, I don't even know the game that it's associated. What do you think is Gannendorf? He's green, right? Yeah. How about?

That's your. No, I understand your reasoning perfectly. I can see where you're coming from. Like, even Zelda is like a L-Captain-Falcon. You specifically just mean the fire emblem people. Yeah, I mean like the lady with the glasses. You don't mean Captain Falcon. Well, no, because he's got like a costume.

You can say anything to me, and I could predict what Joe is going to say about it. I fully understand the rationale. What about when Kirby sucks up Mart's power? I see I'm a big Kirby fan. Yeah, he loves Kurt you are. He reminds me a fucking Kirby. Was that so sweet? Pink fucking fat ass.

sucking up every drop of anything that's for you. Yeah. Changing. Changing all the time. Different outfits. You wear different outfits almost every day. Copying. Different powers.

Copying Joe Box from a podcast about this. Yeah. Rightful Inventures of Joe Box. Yeah. Rightful adventures also have Walk It Down with Talk Em Down Way G. Walk him. Talking Box with Walk him down, J.G. Yeah.

Yeah. See, I'm just trying to create the environment where we all have fun in. So do you have any interview questions you want us to ask you about Joe Box? Yeah, because we don't really... Could you feed us some questions to ask? I actually have some fun... I have some fun things, Joe Box-related things, that I think I should run by you guys. Oh, yeah, please.

It might be two, it might be three. Okay. Season two? But... Guys, I just saw his top apps when he scrolled down the thing. Drop them. I saw two. Patreon.

Okay, that makes sense. This isn't my top apps. This is just the top line of my... Oh, I like that. Why is everything blind? black and white. Dude, if you don't know that about Joe's phone, you're not a real Joe fan.

I'm not a real Joe fan. Joe's phone is always in black and white. Joe's phone stays in black and white except for videos. Yep. And I don't know how he did that. New York Times, Patreon, tennis channel, U.S. Open, YouTube. And I just downloaded YouTube.

But you just downloaded you. Wait, this is all you got. Well, there's other pages. Oh, my God. You've fucking 20 apps on the bottom bar. Well, so I have my widgets up here. We know widgets. This is a psycho way to arrange your phone.

I think this is the only way to do it. No, you're crazy. What's the last one you're listening to? It's, I don't know what this song. It's. That's by faces, right? No, it's by a guy named Luke Temple. It looks like that faces album cover.

And I have two songs saved by Luke. Okay. All right. Go back to the apps, please, and shout about this stupid song. I thought Joe was big on Rod Stewart. So I have up at the top. This is your phone. This is all you have left to right.

Yeah. So at the front, at the home screen, it's pictures of my dog that cycle through. Yes. Okay. And I liked that one. That was a good one. You want more? That's a really good one.

Go to the part, the crazy part of this. I open it up. Show your past go to the camera. I've got the weather up there and it says. Dude, no one cares about the widgets. Please go to the apps. No, no, no, no. Explain the entire flow of your phone.

You unlock your phone. You see weather at the top. Weather at the top and I get a sense of what the day is all about. You don't have a single normal page of applications on your phone. Well, this one. Oh, okay. You have one that has New York. Times, Patreon, Tennis Channel, U.S. Open and YouTube.

Yeah. But then why do you have four, instead of just making more pages over here? Well, so I don't like a lot of clutter. So I like to put up, duck them all away here. You have, so then I. 31 apps on your bottom bar. No, that's notifications. Well, I have a lot of notifications.

How can you count that? I've got my, something called counting. This is all the stuff. What you have more? There's multiple pages in each of the folders. This can't go out. So this one is, we can't release it. Go to the second page of that.

This is going to be like, we're going to release this. It's going to be, people are going to find out Joe has a dark message. This is all 18, 18, next folder. This is crazy. Is that the New York Mets map? It's the MLB app. Oh, 32.

Wait, see, MLB. There are apps on the bottom thing. I didn't even know you could make that a folder. Why do you got the, why you got the Mets logo on the MLB app? Can you change them? Yeah, you can change it for your favorite team. Oh, that's fun.

It is fun. So this is if I want to, this is like entertainment. and YouTube and YouTube and YouTube for entertainment you have

Spotify Audible Google Maps notes and IMDB that's your entertainment Google Maps

well that's if you want to go out yeah do something that is yeah that's finding

entertainment yeah so then here is all my kind of communications um okay

and this is like the settings what is settings on your bottom dock photos photos

yeah settings is like a widget then here is I want to watch. YouTube TV, Hulu, HBO, Mets, S&Y. Prime Video. Yeah, but I haven't, I have to re-download. And then this is all like bank, this is anything I'm going to spend money on. Okay. You have a hundred million. No games on your phone. What's the minute? You skipped a folder

there. Yeah, you did. Where? On the duck. The scroll to the right. This one. This one? No, wait. No, I did. No, no, no. You skipped a page. You want to see my, my investment, my Charles Schwab. Schwab. I knew. So here's my question. Why do you have a second page there where there's clearly room for one more at? Disregard. Do you put that, do you bury that Charles Schwab in there? So if someone mugs you and takes your phone and they can't mess with your investments, they're going to see

all these and get blinded by, oh my God, Con Edison. Well, I shouldn't get into his Con Edison account. They'll see this phone. He converted his phone into a dumb phone. This phone is from the 1920s. There's no point. So then this, I use this screen a lot which has all the stuff on it. You have the UPS app.

Fucking sick fuck. I have my New York Times games here where I can do my crosswords and such. I know you're not playing Mr. Bullitt anymore. Oh, I'm on the crossword. That game I put you on too. That tile game that they just added is for babies. The Domino's one is so fun.

I fucking hate it. Why don't you like it? So the real thing takes two seconds and it's over. It's not supposed to. I know. I only like the ones that I'm on my sporkel shit. What is Sporkel? It's quizzes.

Oh. And that's my number one. That's my like. Like, if I'm going to sleep, I'll do some sportical quizzes. That's really cute. Look at this. Look at this. Look at this.

When we lived together, I showed you Mr. Bullitt. That's the best game ever. That's the... That's the... Sporticle. So you earn badges for, like, the quizzes that you play and check this out. Or you ranked globally. Most of the quizzes aren't very good.

That's low. That means you ranked low. Well, they're also hard to find... It's hard to, like, parse... Okay, why are... Oh, unearned. I need earned. There's a lot of badges

I've earned the quite presidential badge 17 times Dude you got the late night badge I think that means I played at night Okay I played 15 quizzes between 10 p.m. and 12 a.m. in one day It's not that late Yeah But quite presidential I got 100% on the U.S. president quiz

Wow, you played that thing 17 times Yeah It's kind of a thing just to keep up with my Just to make sure I still remember everything So who's your favorite president that's on that list of U.S. presidents. It's got to be Lincoln. Lincoln's your favorite?

Lincoln. Lincoln, Teddy Roosevelt. You want to hear a favorite deep cut president? A presidential tangentially presidential fact. Taft had his

summer White House, his summer vacation home was in Beverly, Massachusetts. Really? And he loved Beverly so much that Beverly Hills in California

is named after Beverly Mass. Really? Yeah. Isn't that fucking crazy? That is awesome. And I think I don't know if he named it or he was involved in the

naming of it, but those two things were just in the same sentence on Wikimileau. There's a bunch of shit like that where stuff on the, because that's how Portland is named after Portland Maine. Oh yeah, I didn't even know that. Is that true? Someone said that it was a coin toss. Someone said that it was either, I fucking love that shit. Yeah. Someone said that

it was either going to be Portland, Oregon or Boston Oregon. Yeah. And it was decided on a coin toss. I saw that YouTube short. Yeah. That's cool. I didn't know that. That was on a Mr. Beat video. Mr. Beat? You love Mr. Beat, man. Presidential Elections of American.

Specifically, Beverly Mass and Beverly Hills is so crazy to me. Does Beverly Hills being made? You've got to get a real, be a real mass head to get into the Beverly. Oh, yeah. You don't know about it. That's North Shore, right? North Shore, baby. Yes, sir. Yes, yes, yes, yes.

Shout out. The home, the, I read the Wikipedia made for Beverly Mass. Yeah, today. Wow. The, um, the, they say it was the start of the American Industrial Revolution. was in Beverly because of all the manufacturing. Yes, the textile mills. They have all types of mills and historical things there.

Mill number five and Lowell just shut down. Do you know that? Yeah, you know. Oh, you know what they have the Saugus Ironwoods? Lull Spinners. Lots of... I didn't hear you. The Lull Spinners?

Yes. Is that a team? That's a minor league baseball team. I was at a Lull Spinners game when Robin Williams died or when that was announced. Were you in Lowell? Yeah. Dude, that's so crazy. We were 45 minutes away from each other in 2014.

Look at that. And now? Now look at us. We're inches. Now you're only a minute away from each other. Yeah. Yeah. It would take me a minute to go away.

Oh, you wanted to show us something. We got sidetracked because you guys. Your box questions. Like always, you guys wanted to make fun of the show. Hold on, hold on. I want to know. But, man.

I want to know your favorite, like, deep cut president here. Because you said Lincoln is such an easy answer. Lincoln is easy answer. Lincoln is like your favorite band is the Beatles. Yeah. Let's assume everybody's favorite is Lincoln. What's number two?

Don't say Washington. Or Washington. I mean, yeah, John Adams, you can't really say deep cut. John Quincy Adams, cool because he's the only other guy out of the founding fathers adjacent who didn't own slaves, which is an easy, easy dub back then. Man, why you're so stuck on this slavery thing? Jesus Christ. We'll see the thing for yourself.

It's the trouble with presidents because you always have to understand that their bottom line is probably not going to be super above board. Like it's to try to run a country, especially like a major power. Who was president in 1933? 1933, I think was, it's either Coolidge or Hoover. Who was president in 1922? That's got to be my boy Woodrow. No, Woodrow is the fifth.

Wait, no, Coolidge is 20s. No, Coolidge and Hoover are 30s. Because then you get FDR coming in post Hoover. And then before who's in the 20s? Coolidge and Hoover. Well, then there's, oh, Warren G. Harding is fun because he was super corrupt. Yeah. And he died and people think that people killed him.

Did he come in after McKinley or? He's after McKinley. Was he directly after McKinley? No, McKinley, I think, is turn of the century. McKinley's like the one that I, the president before Trump. Obama? That's my favorite. But.

Obama's cool. McKinley, I liked McKinley when I was younger because I had the, you know, the, you know, the, you know, the D.K. visual dictionaries. I had one of those on like weapons and there was a like I learned about the gun that killed McKinley and I was like wait how many I thought it was just Lincoln and JFK that got assassinated and then I learned that McKinley also got assassinated

he got assassinated by like some Czech Republic guy or I guess it was Czechoslovakia back then but it was like no one talks about that assassination because I think everyone's just kind of like yeah he sucked no one talks about he deserved that Garfield either yeah

well Garfield, I think, was a guy who, I might be mixing it up, but I think Garfield, the guy who killed him was just a crazy guy who, in his head, thought that James Garfield promised him a job. Yeah. And then he killed him because he didn't get a job. You think he was maybe like one of those, you think he was like a guy that actually Grover Cleveland's cool?

Mercury poisoning. Oh, Grover Cleveland has some crazy is. He's not cool. He married his niece. He did some evilish. He's the one who raised his niece up to be married. I'm saying purely in the sense that he lost re-election and then came back and one again. Boat?

He had secret surgery on a boat. Oh, okay. He had secret oral surgery. And he almost died. You guys, you guys know about Jumbo? Yes. LBJ?

Yeah. LBJ used to flop that thing out and be like, take a look at Jumbo. He had a giant penis. Yeah. It was crazy. I feel like as a president, you... I really want to see, though, because I just don't know. Well, I want to say...

I think it's just got to be... There's got to be. It's thick. Yeah. It's not long. Well, I think it's probably the combination of both. And also, maybe penises were smaller back then. That's true.

Dickflation. Yeah. Do you think it wouldn't go the other way? I feel like it probably went the other way. But I think also, if you go back far enough, there isn't really as much of a way to see how big a person's penis is around the world. So the really big ones don't do. I think every U.S. president. Every U.S. president should have it in a database.

And those motherfuckers in ancient Egypt were packing, apparently. You guys, priapus? yes priapus the ancient Roman deity of fertility of fertility where scarecrows came from I used to put statue sculptures of priapus which is a guy with

a gigantic dick in the fields to scare away evil spirits and they said that if there were thieves that would go through the fields or like mess with the fields they said that the spirit of priapus would come and fuck them in the ass ouch do you think but it is cool

just when you're creating gods to be like and there's one with it Yeah. Dude, they were just fucking doing everything back there. Yeah. Yeah. They had ones with boobs out as well. Yeah. They had everything. That's what I just rewatch Temple of Doom. Yeah. And they got a little Kalima.

We already talked about this. We did? I wasn't here for it. Yes, we did. Yes, we did. I was just thinking about all the, just like. We already did Temple Day. Okay. Now, actually, you're an ultimate derailer. Talk about now. No, no. I was thinking about all the dogs. Okay. So the Discord server, the Joe Ducers, which is the big tier.

Good. They have, they have, we have sort of a think tank to come up with new beans and what they mean in mechanics. So I figure you three are the ones who know the game best. I'm actually a little bit nervous to bring new people in and try to like explain the vibe. Yeah, it's really complicated. So here are some ideas for beans that I think would be pretty fun. The first and the foremost, and this is from Destrel One, a bean that gives you a free pass

to make your answer disrespectful. Whoa. So, I mean, that is a good bean. I think that is almost handicapping the game in my favor. But you only get one. I think it would be everyone gets one. Yeah, you should only get one of those.

Can I suggest something? And I have to, yes. Can the beans be on just pictures of beans on cards so it's easier to fucking count them? Oh, hell fucking no. I think there's a fun, the tactile bean is a fun. to have a bean. It's really hard to count them.

You just count them. What's easier to count than a bean? Cards. So that's a fun one. Destrel is really the person coming up with most of these. You're counting cards by holding the stack. Yeah, I'm doing this. 1, 2, 3, 15, 7, 7,000, 9-10.

Yeah. Easy, man. This one, I'm very excited about this one. Okay, what is it? A gambit bean. Oh. Which is a bean that you can play before the answers are given, and it will double the amount.

So it's like an all-or-nothing sort of beam where you play it. And if you win that... Can that one be a card? Because a gambit. Sure. The superhero game. Yeah, everyone could get it. That would make sense.

So it would be instead of a two beam, you get four for that answer. So if you really feel confident... But if you get zero, you lose 100. I think if you get zero, you maybe lose a B. Well, you just lose the B. You don't get to use that B again. Yeah, you don't get to use a special card. You shouldn't lose.

Okay. You don't need to lose it. These are all double or nothing, not double or double or double. double them less. And then the other, oh, then once beans get too powerful, a neutralizing bean that neutralizes the other beans in play on that round. That one I don't like that. So if two other people play a special bean.

Yeah, it's probably too powerful. I don't know that it's too powerful. You just have to tweak that one a lot. No one would ever use their special beans. The other really fun idea is a, is maybe in place of a silver bean round, which to the people who are unfamiliar. Look, if you're not familiar, go familiarize yourself.

We're not going to fucking waste time. I'm not going to... He has a... We'll make his name blue. Click on the blue dolphin. That's what a dolphin is. Cuckoooooooo, yeah. When they're flying, man,

you can't tell the difference between the other than a fire. Well, they fly out the water and then down back in the jump. So when you jump, you think you call that flying. You've seen free willy, man? Yeah, the dolphin movie. Come on, see life. Then the last one is a final Jeopardy style round. At the end, it's a wager.

Wow. Wasn't that in the first one? No, I don't think that. To me, that's a good idea. That is a tested kind of mechanic. I'm going to, I'm always, it always works. I'm going to be pulling from other games as the game evolves. Yeah.

I have to. I'm trying to think of other things you could do. Survivor, there's some stuff with like, but there's not really an elimination. You need to be taken from like a game show, like a legit game show. What about? Oh yeah, maybe some Wheel of Fortune

stuff. Yeah. You should have everything. See, I never liked Wheel of Fortune though. Wheel of Fortune felt so just Pat Sejack. I don't really like him that much. Not because of his views, but because of how he hosted the show. What kind of views is? Is he? Very mega guy.

Pat Sejack? Yeah. Pat Sajack? Did he die, Patrick? I don't think he did. I think he might be still alive. Regis is not a game show. Oh, who wants to be a millionaire? Sorry. Anyway.

It's Ryan Sechrest. I think it is Ryan Sechrest now. He did. He definitely retired. It's Trebek that's dead, though. Hey, Siri. This is one of my least favorite things about Joe. Can I just say that?

Is Pat Sejack alive? If you have Hey, Siri on, something wrong with you, man. Yes, he's alive, yeah. He was a T-Cot guy. Remember T-C-C-C-T-O-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-P. Oh, I forgot about the Tea Party, man. I'm pretty sure Pat Sajjak was. But Tea Party was like more Sierra Palin.

Yeah. Yeah. So was Pat Sejack. He was Tea Party-ish, allegedly. But you know what? United People at 7. At 7.30 p.m. every weekday. Yeah.

For the fucking worst game in the world Jeopardy better. Jeopardy better. Fuck, we love fortune. Yeah. You know what you should get? Every other game show sucks. Yeah.

Jesse's the only good one. Any other ones that get into the trivia and it's like if you don't know it, you're a fool. Yeah. I have an idea. Yeah. So there's this game.

It was called Press Your Luck. It was from the 70s and they had the Whamie. Yeah. This is where the double whammy comes from. I don't think I was. No whamies comes from. Yeah. I know the little character.

Well, you should have either the calcifier or something like that and there should be a whammy round or something. A bowser tile. Yes. Like a whammy.

A maryo party. Yeah. I mean, so the calcifier bean. Oh, you earned a bean. It's a bone. It's a bone. And if you don't get it out of your bucket in the next 10 seconds, it will explore. And by the way, this looks exactly like all the other beans. You have to do the egg on the spoon race. Against Joe.

Oh, and something. There would be something, if we had something that was like, you know, inside the NBA when Shaq and Katie run, something like that would be amazing. Yeah, that's good. Yeah, see, I mean, my, my, one, it's been, it's discussed in future episodes, but objectivity is going to enter the game. Yeah, how do you figure that's kind of? There will be rounds that are objective winners,

and there will be still the subjective fun. I think you'll be surprised how we can make objective. Well, I think that's the fun of it, is the best of finding about it. Yeah, I think you'll be surprised how unobjective the objective rounds will become. Yes. Yeah, I'm sure. I mean, I'm, I know there will be arguments and qualms brought up frequently as the game goes on. Not to spoil anything, but.

What is up with you tonight and trying to spoil every last fucking second of Joe Box? I'm not trying to spoil anything. You are. You keep saying, oh, not spoiled something. It's about the journey, man. I said I'm not trying to spoil it after. I respect the journey. I'm not trying to spoil it.

Like, don't even bring it up. Okay. If I had to, if I had to say my favorite round, I won't spoil it. We had a lot of fun. My favorite round.

I don't know if that's the case. I didn't have any fun. It was pure. It was grueling. Yeah. It was grueling. My favorite round was pure business. The silver bean round for episode three.

Oh yeah. I think was. If it's what I'm thinking of, I think that was my favorite. It was the, yeah, the homework, if you will.

Oh, on. Oh. Yeah, I like that one too, guys. Yeah, that one feels like a future direction that the show will go down as it becomes a regular thing that, you know, homework assignments. Just really happens. Tell me who you, who's your dream Joe Box?

Yes. Actually, your dream Joe Box lineup, left or right. Tell me. You got three people, motherfucker. And it can't include any of us because I know you would just say the three of us. Yeah, yeah. That's easy. I should have said.

that, that is probably actually true. Probably diplomatic. But I'm saying who would you, you would just give it a perfect, anybody in the world, living or dead, but you can't say Hitler. Yeah. I know that you wanted to do the same list from earlier. Create your, create your challenge. Joe Returno.

Joe, recognize your wrongdoing. And Hitler. Joe, right now I want you to create your, what's this guy's name? The Justice League The three greatest guests The three greatest guests Well there's definitely Joe Box lineup

Mm-hmm Idris Elba Sean Evans And chicken shop date And chicken shop date That's the worst That sucks man I thought it was going to be people we know

No I didn't think it was going to be No, no, yeah. Explain, what do you think these three people individually bring to the table? Because I can, I can kind of,

unless there's something I don't know about Eder's Elba, I can kind of understand the through line between Sean Evans and Chicken Shop Day. I think they just were both on... I think Eretre's Elba was just on both of the shows. Yes.

Chicken Shop Day is the British girl. Yeah. I was thinking down the lines of it becoming a promotional opportunity for people trying to push their own thing. Right. You think that that would be even more exciting than having, like, cool celebrities on. I'm thinking...

Is Idriselba not cool? He's all right. Heard Salba is the one that is... But tell me, people who you think would... It would make them for the most entertaining episode of Joe Box. While also being famous celebrities. They don't have to be famous celebrities. They have to be famous celebrities.

Yeah. Who's the fattest person you want to have on the show? How fat will you go? I have no limit. No limit? Wow. No limit. Buddy, I could show you your limit.

Like, as a person or you? Somebody. I'll show you somebody. That'll be your limit. How young would you go? Well, I think there's potential... Skinny and young. I think there's potential for Joe Box Jr.

I think having Joe Box Jr. would be correct. I think having Joe Box Jr. You'd be the host? Well, we could get a kid to do it. You know what? I don't know why. You feed it into an earpiece. You tell the kid what to say.

Well, I think that you'll get... I'm still waiting on your celebrity lineup. Well, it's tough to say because I, I mean... Here's the thing I know, as I know... Can you not name three celebrities that hold the values of respect, accuracy, and hilarity in their hearts? Can you just not do that? Well, it's a lot... Okay.

Before you go celebrity, how about you do this? Fictional characters. Who would you want on? Cheese from Foster's Home. Oh, yeah, he's funny. That's a good one. That's a really good one. Honestly, Eduardo.

Honestly, cheese, Eduardo and wilt. That's okay. Kind of same vibe. Who are each of us? This got to be cheese. I was thinking, Eduardo. You think I'm cheese? You look like cheese.

Yeah, I think so. Put a picture of cheese and put it next to Caleb real quick. I think cheese, I think blue, honestly. You're maybe you're blue and your cheese. I'm cheese? I'm cheese? I don't think you I think you could be

at, are you just, you in my That's the wrong cheese But that's just Looks good though That's just the food Um Cheese from Foster's home Okay so then can we just reasonably say

For the famous celebrities Just the voice actors For all those characters Yeah voice actors I would How about this? Imagine this man Matt Trey and Seth

Oh that's good Madstone Trey Parker and Seth McFarland. McFarland. Have to make it a treaty. Oh, that would be tough. Because you know that it's two versus one.

Yeah. Why don't you go Matt and Trey as one? Uh-huh. Yeah. Matt Gaining and Seth. Oh, yeah. They're all getting variety. Variety coffee.

Yeah. That's good. Yeah, that's pretty solid. How about this? Bender. Chevy Chase. Steve Martin. Martin Short.

That's good. You would not give Martin Short a single point. Oh, yeah. He hates Martin, I don't hate Martin Short. I forgot. Wait, no, you're right. He doesn't hate Martin Short.

He just doesn't understand the hype. I don't get the hype. I was surprised. He was just surprised to find out that Martin Short was that guy for a lot of people. I was surprised, because I remember seeing him in things as a child. And he just never made an impact. I was surprised that people were like, and that guy is one of the greats. Okay.

Well, I just want to put in my own words. Watching a movie. And that guy's one of the greats. No, no. That's what I'm saying is that never happened. It didn't happen. If someone did that, I would maybe be able to contextualize them properly. Here's my question.

Maclemore. You would do. Wait, would you give Ryan Lewis a spot or not? Ryan Lewis could be, he could be the like Paul Schaefer for the episode. Yeah, no, no, no, here's the question. But honestly, Ryan Lewis's beat, Macamore without Ryan Lewis's beats, not as great as the combo. The excitement in your voice that just jumped up. Right.

Your voice just sounded so different. Macomore, Lil Dickie. Oh, yeah. Who's the third here? Who's the third in that? Yeah. Here's my question, though. You don't like Martin Short that much.

You don't like Martin Short. Who, what is your all-time worst Joe Box lineup, the worst three? Joe Paterno, Joe Peterno, Son. Paterno, San Desk. Not like that, though. Not like that, though. People you just don't like for no reason. What's the worst Joe Box Jr. line up?

Ethan. Jaded and Tanner The worst lineup Yeah But not like, not like Oh well Hitler obviously Like we obviously know that Who do you think would just bomb?

The people, yeah yeah I hear Catherine Hegel's very hard to work with Oh yeah Okay Yeah But maybe LDS Interesting

What? Let's get into the drama She is Joe this is the other I've been coaching Joe on YouTube shorts lately Yeah And this is the other thing

Joe You got it every once in a while say something controversial like that so that a reel can get posted and we will post this that says like Joe drops crazy diss on Catherine Higel. I have no, I have no ill will towards

Catherine Higel. I don't know enough about... She's in the blame it out of what's real. You don't understand this is getting cut it. You already gave us. What if one day I'm working with Catherine Higel? Three celebrities you want to diss these, okay, what's your worst

Joe Box lineup? And it's got to be three celebrities that you want to dis. Um, who do I want to dis? Rank our moms. Who's got the hottest mom and whose mom's a fucking pig. No, I'm not going to do this. Why not? I don't know.

What kind of animal would you be? Kind of animal would I be? If you were. If you were a fucking fucked up dog. Um. You could fuck any animal, which one would you do? Yeah, if you were a dog and you could fuck any animal besides a dog. Because who gives a fuck your thing?

I don't give a fuck of a dog's fucking a lizard. A wolf? All right, boring. A wolf doesn't count cat. If you were can of spray paint, what color would you be? Not a cat. But I'm a dog. Yeah.

And I just have sex with an animal. Can't be a dog, human, cat, wolf. Can't be like a domestic thing or something in the family of those. If you had to suck off any slasher villain. It's like a hybrid going to happen. It's just about the sex. It's just about the sex. You'll wear a condo.

All right. Same question of you. If I had to suck off any slasher villain, probably Matthew Lillard and Scream. This is an interesting one here because we have, most of them are mentally challenged. Yep. Well, it's easy, dude, it's scream. I'm telling you. It's a good question.

It is a good question. And or they have disgusting skin lesions and disfigurements all over their body. Freddie's now. I don't think scream quite counts. That's a pleasure. No, no, no, no. Okay. Scream counts, but you got to do the whole squad. Okay.

Yeah, scream is two of them. And scream is different every movie. You got a huge, you got to go a pencil. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Screen one then. So you just want to suck a bunch of guys. There's two high school boys. That's what you are.

I'm in high school in this scenario. No, you're not. You're over 50. You have to preface, though. You're a milf. You have to preface with how old you are. Male milf. I'm a male milk.

And also, you can't say Jason's mom from the first Friday of the 13th when she technically was the slasher. Dude, look at his skin. He's a pedophile. He's a pedophile. I haven't seen the movie. And he goes in your dreams. Well, I just feel like it's sort of getting him back for haunting all the people's dreams. That's a genie.

It's kind of scary looking. You suck the tail? He does this. He's an evil genie. That's at least, I feel like it would be interesting if he's one who's not human. If you said my dick, I'll grant you any wish. I wish that's a suck your dick. I wish to suck your dick. You'll never believe the twist that I concocted.

My dick has a twist. Now, who is this guy? The wishmaster? The Wishmaster from Wishmaster in the prison scene in Wishmaster is so funny. Yeah, he says suck. Well, I think he does make someone suck his own dick. I think so. Yeah, he makes his lawyer.

He makes his lawyer fucking himself. Yeah. Michael Myers. Yeah. Also, yeah, mentally challenged one. Yeah, they're mostly mentally challenged. You're right. God, who would.

Chuckie? Chuckie, I mean, Chuckie is the best choice because it's not real. He's a boy. He's grown. It's a toy. He's grown? Have we seen it? What?

Have we seen it? Have we? Well, his whole body burns apart. Chuckie's got a smooth. You have to imagine that you... Okay, so they have to have a pee. They probably have to have a pee. They have to have a pee so Chuckie doesn't count.

They have to? Yeah. Charles Lee Ray, I guess. Yeah, Brad Doriff. I really don't have the encyclopedic knowledge that you guys have. So I kind of had to go for a crew there. I kind of think that stuff like I think that the kind of the hoodonness to like scream. I know what you did last summer, all that.

I think those just shouldn't count because those are just, normal people. What about... If I was a dog, I'd probably say fish. What's that fucking... If you fuck a fish? Yeah. What about that little pumpkin head, motherfucker from...

Oh, pumpkin head. From pumpkin head. No, from... Well, that's a kid. You're from Tricker Treat. That's a little kid. He's an animal. That is a little kid.

He's a pumpkin animal. You can pull up a picture, please. He's dressed... He's dressed up like a... Just search trick or treat Sam right now. He's a pumpkin animal. Just search of it. He's been around for decades.

Let's get a full body. shot of this character up on screen, please for Caleb to suck off. Dude, he's he has a pumpkin head. That's a kid though. Okay, dude, dude. You know who has a pumpkin head

and a little kid is pumpkin head. Yeah, who's pumpkin head? Pumpkin head from pumpkin head from pumpkin head. You want to suck off a thing that has a pumpkin for a head. That's his real head. That's what he's looking. His body doesn't change. What is this?

Who is this? This is who I was talking about. Let's look up to see more about Frankie Gis. What about the leprecon? Lepricon's not a terrible. Yeah, he's not a slasher. I agree. I think he's a slasher.

I don't think he's a slasher. He's a wisher. Slasher just has to kill people. If the wishmaster's not a slasher, lepracons is not a slasher. We'll give him wishmaster, so I haven't seen it. All right. I think any,

I think that's this thing where they just kill people in the movie. Who's that actor in Wishmaster? He looks like when he looks like when the genie in Aladdin does Jack Nicholson face. Can I like that? Yeah, I forget his name. Can you fight back? Like, can I, you... What the fuck do you think is going on?

It's a consensual act. No, no, no, no. I know, but consensual act. I understand it, but could I, if it's a Freddie Kruger type, maybe I do a bite and I attack him to... No. No. I mean, we're attacking someone during a consensual blowdown.

In order to stop him, it's like a honeypot. We're trying to get him to stop doing his crime. If you bite one of their dicks, you got to do it. You got to do it. another one. Yeah. Well, I wouldn't do it if I knew that. I think, I think, I think also, I think, I think, I think, I think, I think, Wishmaster probably and, and, uh, I don't know which probably aren't, aren't slasher's,

but I think that, yeah, but I think it's more interesting if you can bend the definition and candy man. And yeah, Candyman is a good one. And what I was going to throw in there is that we're going to bend the definition, uh, like that, uh, like the xenomorph is also one that's in there because that, just because, just for the story, man, that feels fucking crazy. That feels like it would, like, kill you. That's like you don't think there's anything on the xenomorph.

You could suck off. It would pull it out and then the second one comes out from the one. Yeah, but that's its baby. Dude, every part of it you could suck. Yeah, the xenomorph. You suck off the predator? Yeah, I think so. That's kind of human-like, right? There's plenty that are human.

Yeah, no, I know, but I'm saying, like, maybe that it not being human makes it a little bit more fun. That's what I'm saying. That's why, that's why I'm throwing in the movie. What is the Predators downstairs? Like, what is this? What is, does he wear pants? I don't think we see that.

Is it what it's called? No. But he runs around, right? I haven't seen those. Michael is a different movie. about Michael is John Travolta. He's an angel. Yeah, he's a fallen angel.

Yeah, if I'm sucking off anyone, it's Michael for Michael. If you could suck off anybody who's from a movie where the name of the movie is just a first name. Forrest Gump. No, it has to be just a first name. Nixon. Oh, that's a last name. Okay, it can be, okay, I can be a last name, but it has to just be one word, one word name title. All right, the Nixon or.

Dude, still pumpkinhead, bro. Dang. Jason X. I'm sucking out Jason X. Oh, Christine. That car. That's good. That's a good pick.

That's actually the best. Coojo. Well, Joe was Coojo. He'd fuck a fish, by the way. You did say that. You would fuck a fish if you were Coojo. Yeah, but what else am I going to do? What would you guys?

A fucking monkey. I'm not allowed to fuck a dog. A monkey. A monkey, bro. Fish I feel less bad about than monkey. Yeah, he listened to that Nirvana song. Fish don't have any feelings. Why is this always entering into your brain in such a way?

I'm being forced to have sex with stuff. It's a hypothetical question. But I can't for an icebreaker at a college orientation. Yeah. That's the vibe we're going for. This is what Joe Paterno was asking at Penn State. I was good at the ice breakers, man. Dude, you're not showing it right now.

Because I have fun with the simple ones. All right. Icebreaker. So what was a normal icebreaker thing? What, how many, how many licks does it take for you? Yeah. A million. That's cool.

You'd say that. That's fucked up. Wait, why did Joe get so cool? Yeah. We just met him. Seriously. What was a college orientation thing? I just said, well, my, my freshman year roommate.

Circle up Eminem's icebreaker. Introduct. I'm not doing a scavenger hunt right now. Match the baby picture. Okay. That'd be fun. Like two, two truths and a lot. I do two truths

I would fuck pumpkin head I have wings Two truths and a lie You do two things that are not You do two lies in a truth That's fucked up That's no no you think that makes you good at That makes everybody dislike you

It'd be like I love eating pasta I really don't like eating pasta And I lived on Mars That's terrible That's what you You thought you were good at it I actually, I actually would have been like, we are never, ever talking to this guy. I can't believe what you just said.

I can't believe it. That's funny. That's not funny, but I like pasta. I hate pasta. And I lived on Mars. That sucks. That completely sucks. It's not about being the most clever person in the world.

It's just about being. Dude, no. That's dog shit. That's good. That's good. No, that's a terrible answer. That's possibly the worst answer I've ever heard in my life. Give me a new answer right now.

Give me the most serious answer you can. No joking but fun. Or just do a good one. Okay, I would do. Well, so I think the more the Mars thing was maybe, the Mars thing was maybe a bridge too far. We're great. Well, yeah, but see, that's the thing. I don't like pasta.

I didn't say it like that. I didn't say it like that. If someone said that, I would think they're so funny. I would be like, who is this guy? I would also be like, who is this guy? Yeah, I'm not in a good way, though. I'm cool. I'm playing it cool the whole time.

I'm not like cracking jokes. I'm a quiet guy in the corner. And then it's finally your chance. Yeah. And how about you, Joe G? Well, first of all, I love eating pasta. Everyone's already fucking out. No.

You're acting like this is the, I don't know anyone in this room and I'm just trying to. This is your first impression. I understand that, but you have to remember that you're going through everyone's super mundane boring shit. So I wouldn't do the Mars thing. Again, it's pretty far. I would do like, give a, give a. I would do, I would do, I, um, uh, my, I grew up in New York City. Um, my favorite food is sushi, and I've never eaten sushi in my life. That's bad. It's funny. It's playing with the convention of the icebreaker.

Come on. That's not bad. That's terrible. It's light. That's terrible, bro. That's funny, man. I don't. It's not that good. I'm not saying it's great. Okay, here's one from the list. Here's one from the list. Ready? If you could give a TED talk about any subject without preparation, what would it be? Bread.

Bread. It's good. I like that one. I like that. That's a good one. That's a good one. Yeah, go. Bread.

Every single. I would, so I'll do the bullet points because I would want to write it out. But I would talk about how. each or the thing I would want to track is how each all these different cultures across the world all sort of have their own version of bread from the like grains and stuff that were available

just improvise it right now improvise the TED talk right now I would have a big map just give us like you walk out your fingers tented and give us like your first couple sentences like what's your attention grab or that's what we want you don't need to give any real

like you can make up the statistics or anything you need um i'd be like i'd walk out and it would be a map and then a little circle would appear um in like the middle east and uh and it would be zooming into the map and i'd kind of be pacing the stage back and forth and it would keep zooming into that circle and then until it gets to a very big close up and maybe there's some tense music building up and then it comes into the circle all the way and then I go non and then it reveals that that is a non

can I just you don't see this and you walk out on stage and it's just a map of the world with a little dot on the Middle East and that you silently pace back and forth and it slowly zooms in with tense music you don't think that that's

intriguing isn't non from India it's from India That's an Indian word. That's an Indian word, God. What am I thinking of You're done. Non.

In the Middle East and like Saudi Arabia. Non. Well, what's... What is it? What am I thinking of? Because it's similar. Pita.

Pita, like something like Pita or like... That's what I'm talking about. I'd go non. I'd go. No. pita and then I go to India and it would be not that's what I'm saying is we'd have all these little things

like seaweed rice seaweed seaweed that has nothing to do with bread but it's like the I don't know what the Japanese bread is um there's what does there's so many other breads immediately went to

okay none is from the middle Peter and the bread of Seaweed. Seaweed. Well, I'm thinking of like, I'm thinking of, so maybe bread, I'm thinking of the different versions of bread.

The food that's edible that you wrap around your stuff. Yeah. Okay, so you're thinking you would do with TED Talk on wraps? Yeah, I mean, I get bread. I think that the, I think the the, um, the crops. Non.

Seweed. Non. Peter, seaweed. These are the brands of the world. Tell me that wouldn't be a good TED Talk. It wouldn't be. In the first three seconds, everything's wrong. Well, the first three seconds are standing there.

Everybody gets up and leaves. Most amazing. Most amazing TED Talk ever. Most amazing TED Talk ever, you go out, you do that. And then, like, you're just saying all this shit wrong. And then at the end, you're like, by the way, this is how important, uh, important. misinformation. Yeah.

Stopping this. This is what a maybe racist guy might say. If everybody, if I hadn't said something, all of you would have left today is thinking, hmm, in Japan, they use seaweed as bread. Yeah.

They do. To some extent. They used it as a wrap. As a wrap. Yeah. Oh, yeah. And then the thing of the top that says bread, the word red, the word bread flips over and it just says

wraps. And it's like this whole presentation has been about wraps, not bread. Baguettes would be a, involved. That's an easy one. Well, yeah, that's bread. Yeah. White bread. Yeah, that's bread. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, that's also the type of bread. Where's Chapata from? Italy. Italy, that's what I thought. I'm asking the audience. Yeah. You actually should do this. That's what I thought. That's what I thought. Yeah, no, you're right. This is such a good idea. Can we get you on stage to do it? Can we get you on stage to do a

an improvised TED talk on an item of food yeah on a class of food wait wait wait wait this is an amazing idea we we it's we don't tell you Joe has to do a TED talk and then he has to click through the slides he's never seen them before. Ted talks on the spot

TED talk on the spot wow you've never seen the slides before this would be dude we have to do this on Joe TV yeah I feel confident yeah I think I did a pretty good job uh huh I think you did too some of the details were were I have to say, man, you know, it wasn't great.

Yeah. But I think, I think it was definitely, it definitely felt worse because of the, what it just, your icebreaker. Yeah. That had Kim come back before it. The icebreaker was good, man. Definitely kind of primed me. And also, non as an open.

But you would, you wouldn't do a funny two truths and a lie. Probably not, no. No, no, look, you would. The point is, the point is, the point is, nobody wants to do an icebreaker. Everyone is just getting through it. Well, that's what I'm saying is, I'm just trying. It's not the time for you to grab attention. No, it's not grabbing attention.

We're in this room for two hours, and we're going over two hours of two truths and a line? No, no, no. But the icebreaker is a part of an orientation meeting of it's really boring stuff of like, if you need to do this, you have to go down here. If you want to do, like, get an understanding. Is two truce and a line not the first thing? That's why it's an icebreaker. There's usually some talk up front.

They tell you like, don't bring a gun to class, like stuff like that. And what I'm doing, even if. it is a weird thing. And look, I don't need the people on my floor to be my best friends. I'll find them. Whoa. Lone wolf. Yeah. Well, no, it's, I, my first semester of college, I didn't, I was, you were a loser? I wasn't a loser, but I was, I wonder

why. I, this is for some reason, my first year of college, nobody wanted to hang out with me. Everyone on my floor, no one approached me. You said people were, you were walking by people and they're like, that's the fucking liar. I was well, I was like, I was on Mars. That's the liar. That's the liar.

The Martian The pasta Martian The pasta eating Martian Walking out to everyone Hey look I didn't have friends man

That's cool I'm just trying to alleviate some of the tension in that room And I think that the loose Because I'm not grabbing attention

If I was grabbing attention I'd be doing a big fucking song and dance Okay What's the most attention grabbing To Troose and a lie that you would do?

Let's hear that What'd you just put in your mouth? You ate a cap. One, I've never eaten a cap. Well, yeah, people don't. I've never eaten a cat before. I mean, well, it could be true before you put it in. Yeah, because that's two truths that you just said.

If you do it. Oh, that's great. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. We just gave you an atomic bomb. I've never, I've never eaten a cat. Pray to God that Joe never goes back to school, everybody. I won't. not a school guy. I've never eaten a cat before. I've eaten one cap. I've never eaten a cat

before. Joe, that was terrible. That's fun too. I'm not saying it's the greatest thing, but that's a good option. That was not good, man. I've never eaten. Joe, Joe, the, first off, here's like, that's good before. I would, and then you reach in your pocket, you take out a cap and you're so much worse. It's ten times worse. I've never eaten a cap before. I've eaten a cap. I've never eaten a cap.

It's playing with the form of the two-truths. What you should have done, what you should have done is done a regular, I've never eaten a cap two truths. So technically it's true. Here's how you should have done it. So the first thing, I've never eaten a cap before, then you're two truths. Then at the end you put your cap in your mouth.

Well, see, what I think is so fascinating about the cap. Wait, is that not what... He doesn't want to learn. That's what he did. He put it in at the middle. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. I think I...

He didn't put it in, took it out, and then put it back in. Yeah, no. Let's remove... He does everything. So technically, at that point, it's three truths. Then, right at the end. Wait, what are the three truths then? So, I've never eaten a cap before.

Then truth number one. Normal truth number two. And then after truth number two, he puts the cap in his mouth. But see, that's not... That doesn't really make... That would have been fun. That makes sense completely. That one kind of just...

That one makes the first one of lies. Here's the thing that just doesn't... I'm not saying it makes sense. Yours is three truths and one lie, which is... Can I say also, though... And then the first truth becomes a lie. Someone who starts out by saying, I've never eaten a cat before and finish is by putting the cap in their mouth.

I don't believe that they've never... It's called the... Dude, you know what I'm... It's called the prestige. This is not the first fucking time they've done this. The thing that I find interesting about the cap move is to have a two truths and a lie where within the two truths and a lie

you are actively checking off Look, I agree, sure, this is true I just did it I do the same thing It's a lie But it's not, it's not, it's a lie. Let me say something to it. Yeah, if we're really going to dig into this,

we're really going to dig into this. The issue is anybody who has the issue is anybody who has one that they clearly cooked up and are excited about. You think I was cooking those up? yes those are off the dome also more talented that I thought

you got you got distracted by you putting the cap in your mouth when I asked you like we're straight so far from the original question which is show me your most bombastic I want attention right now so bad two truths and a lie well see I wouldn't do I would only do one that's true to myself this is an area where you have like literal

historic personality disorder I mean I would and you need to attention so bad I would do like, I've never... I'm fucking dying right now. I'm having a heart attack right now. I'm having a heart attack. I've never crawled on the ceiling.

And then I would crawl on the ceiling. And then I would say, I never crawled on the ceiling. I'm the king of the USA. And that's one of my truths. That's two lies. Yeah, I mean, or, yeah, the big lie being just like something crazy. Well, the way you actually grab attention is by you saying the crazy stuff, like, I was actually, I actually did my parents or this or I did this.

I did something crazy. Yeah, I think people are trying to actually put forward truths that are... That would actually be a good answer. My parents did something crazy. My parents are this. My parents are this. I did something crazy and I grew up somewhere. No, I agree.

But I also think, look, I think I'm just always, anything like this, I really think you just need to get it over with. The time for the time to act to socially mix and make your mark is not then. Let's hear yours. I'm not trying to make my mark. Mine would be so, mine is so. Mine is so... Depends on the audience. Let's hear it so that Joe has something to go off.

The more we've talked, the more vindicated I feel in my answers. I think that they're good. Cameron will have the best one. Let's hear it. Okay, I would... The truth I would always do, that's an easy... Because, again, I'm going just most down the middle. I would say, my mom is a teacher.

Because that's easy and boring, and I can just say it. Now, I don't know... I can't think of what else I would usually do. So then I would say, like, I'm from Massachusetts. and I lived on Mars. No, I would probably say something like I can speak three languages or something. I would say something that seems too interesting to be true. I really think that if anybody has to expend any mental effort on your two truths and a lie at all,

you are bringing the mood down. I think that it's not even a time for effort. It's a time for the anguish of everybody, the fear of, oh, I have to do this horrible thing. Right. It's so awful. It just needs to be done. It needs to be done. If you're, if you're extending it by even a second, it's, it has nothing to do with the actual two truths and a lie. Here's mine. Here's mine. I'm making everyone's life better. I was born in 1997. I am from New Hampshire and I want to fuck that guy. And that's what I would do. Do something at the end like, and I'm a pedophile.

And I'm a pedophile. I'm a crazy pedophile. I've never eaten a cat before. I'm a pedophile. And I grew up on my heart. See, that's pretty solid. That's fun. The pedophile is the law. Yeah. Yeah, there you go.

And then you say that at the end. Yeah. So, Joe, now that we've trained you through this, let's hear your ultimate two truths and a lie. I stick to my, I'm sticking with my guns. Joe, you're not allowed to stick to it. The pasta one or the caps one. If you had to choose one of the two.

See, the caps one, I think is two is overcooked a little bit. So you're going to go with pasta. I think I would go with the dump. Because that one's a little more elder day. Next time that you. You are in any sort of thing, job training, whatever. It doesn't matter what it is where you have to do this. You just became CEO.

Will you please take your phone out and put it on the ground and record yourself. Yeah, record yourself saying, or a secret audio. Two truths and a lie. I like pasta. I don't like pasta. And I'm from Mars. See, that's the one thing I would change is I would probably do. That's two lies.

No, no, I know. I would probably, if I was going to actually do it, I would do. I'm from New York. I pasta is my favorite food. And I've never. sushi. Oh, that's the lie. It's not, no, no, no, no, no, no.

That was, can I say, you said sushi earlier. No, no, no, Joe, Joe, Joe. I understand what you're doing. But can I, can I, can I say you're verging on the other extremely, extremely annoying thing people do in two truce and a lie where they do the same thing for the, where they say like, okay, my favorite food is pizza, my favorite food is sushi, and my favorite food is pasta. I'm not doing that.

Well, obviously that one can't be it because you can't have two favorites. But you know what I'm saying? I'm not doing that, though. I said you're verging on it. I know, but I'm doing, I'm negating the original one. I'm making it super easy for everyone. And that's funny. Dude, it's okay.

Guys, check out Joe Box on YouTube. New episodes about Mondays. Mondays. Honestly, it is actually a lot of this. Yeah. At least when we're on it, Joe, how much, how much, uh, time of arguing did you cut out of the first episode? The first episode I cut

30 minutes out of. Yeah. It was a lot of arguing. The first 15 to 20 minutes was rough. We sort of stumbled out of the gate a little bit. So at the beginning of the first episode, it goes,

welcome to Joe Box's first episode. First things first, I should probably actually say thank you to you guys. And you go like, oh, what a novel idea. Thank you. and it is because I cut 15 minutes of actively not doing that so I made you guys look a little bit worse in doing that.

And then I also cut out there was a section where I pressed pause on the recorder. Oh, I remember that. Well, but we found our footing in the next three episodes, did we absolutely did. Or they know there's three more? There's three more coming out.

Of this season. Of this season. And then more to come after that? And then every week. The finale is going to be, It's on a Monday, right? It's Monday. Well, what if we skip movie Mondays one week

and we watch it live together? No offense, but I don't really want to watch that. Give commentary live. We can do that for Talking Box. I was watching a mystery science theater 3,000 last night to go to sleep. What a fun. Shit's fucking fire.

We could be doing that to the episode. We should do that with. I mean, I think we should do it with the episodes of the podcast. Yeah. Yeah. Where can't, what is the Patreon called? Patreon.com slash Joe Box, J-O-E-B-O-X. You can follow it on Instagram.

There's going to be hell of clips. Are you guys cool with me with collaborating on every single clip? You should do. We're not going to put them on our grid, but knock yourself out. You should put it on the podcast Instagram instead of our personal ones. Okay. Depending on how good the clip is. Great.

Yeah. I gave you two collabs on my personal grid. Probably take them off soon. Okay. Probably not going to give you any more. Great. But do it with the podcast one. Okay.

I'll do it with the podcast. I figure it's a fun way going forward of when new people come on. They can get a fun little thing for their grid. They're going to love having a little bit. Who's after us? So after you guys, it's going to be not locked, locked, locked. My idea is that it's going to be one of you two. You should do silhouettes.

One of us. Silhouette reveals. One of you three. He's spoiling that one of us died during the movie. But one of you two beats one of you two. I'm not getting invited to the next. You don't hear that. And Pierce and Alex and seeing how they do in the things.

And then whoever wins that one going like, you know, I'm interested in seeing how different matchups work with the distribution. Well, if you're doing that, you shouldn't do one of us. You should do three new people. And then you should do three more new people. And then the winners of those three. Also, I'm just noticing that. In your currently planned ones,

there's no beautiful women. No, there are women. There are women who have already, who are going to be on it in the future. But I haven't scheduled any of them, is what I'm saying. I wanted to keep it within, I wanted to like have a slow, not, not, uh,

and the only woman that was in your dream one was a chicken shop. That's not her. her name. You're thinking of Brianna chicken for you. Amelia. I'm going to drop her last name right now. DeMoldenburg. Yep. Good one. Great name. Great pull, man.

There will be, there will be all. It's going to be mostly women at one point. There will be all. You ever consider a woman host? Yeah. Well, I'm the host. Yeah, but would you consider replacing yourself with a woman? Maybe down the line if it's very successful. You ever think about having... Joe can go both ways. Why?

What is that mean? Joe can go both ways. Come on. Print it. br-all right good luck on going both ways Joe exhausted this was a taxing one and I have to go take a shit so bad

please press what was bad about this episode I had a fun well I feel like there's a lot there was nothing bad about it but it was it was exhausting I think Joe box had a good time again I had a great time

what has happened stop doing that you're going to pull a cable we're done it's the stupidest thing I've done in a while where I left my apartment right and I okay I live close enough to a grocery store that sometimes I'll like leave one of the doors unlocked to my building so that when I get home it's like I have like three keys to get in my house

sure you leave one of the outside doors along no one of the inside doors okay But sometimes my other neighbor will unlock the outside door. Okay. Like, because they'll, like, go walk their dog. Yeah, yeah. And I left. I was like, oh, fuck, I don't have, like, fucking parsley or some shit. Uh-huh.

I don't have enough vacuum seal bags to suvied my dinner with. My parsley, my parsley, right. Suvied my parsley. I'm on a, I'm on a, I'm on a brontosaurus diet. I need to go out and buy another tray because I'm making all this freeze-dried parsley that I can put in my meals. That sounds delicious. Yeah. So I left.

What do you mean? In your meals? That's a meal right there, a tray of freeze-dried parsley. I'm trying to be modest for a fan. So I leave my house. I go to the grocery store. I come back. I put everything away.

And then I look on the floor and there's a bag of Duncan munchkins like right in front of the washing machine. Uh-huh. And I'm like, what the fuck did he's come from? Uh-huh. I'm sitting there. I'm looking around my apartment. And they're like, what the, like, this is insane. Like, what?

This is insane. Who the fuck had done? Because my, because Noah was gone. Okay. And then my other roommate was also out of town. She's out of town for two weeks. So I'm the only one home. Okay.

My girlfriend's out. Okay. That adds a little bit more to this story that you didn't. Oh, yeah. I also just assumed you knew. But my, my girlfriend was out. She was out like, I forget where, uh, when she wasn't going to be home for like two hours.

so it was like okay when I left there weren't munchkins on the floor but now there are yeah so I'm sitting there and I'm like alright so what must have happened was a guy broke in because I left the

door unlocked a guy broke into my apartment and was eating munchkins while he was doing it heard me open the door heard me open the door also my girlfriend's not like the type to like eat duncan munchkins you know okay she's like uh you know

she eats organic food all the time she eats like a brontosaurus okay and i was like okay couldn't have been her she couldn't have bought munchkins okay so i assume that somebody came in was eating munchkins somebody was like oh like this this place is abandoned i'll come in here i'll It's a bandit. I'll eat these mushrooms. It's a bandit. You're fucking.

Or like a sticky bandit situation, like Home Alone, where it's like the wet bandits. The wet bandits, you know. Oh, they're the sticky bandits. They're the sticky bandits in Home Alone, too. Okay, but we're not going by Home Alone, too, because they're not going into a house in Home Alone 2. Okay, well, they do go into a house at the end. It's called a Brownstone. Those are not kind of houses.

Okay. All right. agree to disagree on this but yeah I assume that the bunchkins are there because somebody was eating them heard me walk in and then ran into my my house is set up like my roommate's room is like right next to the kitchen

so I assume they like went in there and I was like what I'm gonna do I'm so fucking smart for this I'm gonna be like I said out loud oh fuck I forgot this I can't believe I forgot that I'm sorry You need to hear your acting.

Do it right now exactly how you did it. I opened the cabinet and then closed it and then opened it again. I'm like, are you fucking kidding me? And then I close it and then I, I, while I'm walking down my hallway, I like texted. Are you fucking kidding me? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I like open the, like, while I'm walking down, I was like, did you buy, I texted my girlfriend? I was like, did you buy dunchkins?

Do you buy dunchkins? Did you buy dunchkins? She said, what is a dunchkin? I'm so fucking, I'm freaking out. Like, dude, there's a, there's some kind of sticky bandit situation. in my apartment right now. There is some kind of sticky bandits, dude. They are in my apartment right now.

They think that I'm going to leave. So I open the door, I close it, and then I'm standing in the hallway. You fake left. Yeah, I fake left, and I was standing there. And then as soon as I, like, was standing there, as soon as, like, all that happened, I got the text from my girlfriend that was like, yeah, I got a deal. I got free munchkins if I ordered a cold brew. I was like, oh, I'm the biggest fucking idiot in the world.

I fully believe. You said when you texted you said you were saying there with a baseball. Yeah, I had the, so I had the Grand Theft Auto baseball bat from Joe. Joe gave me a Grand Theft Auto 4 branded baseball bat. And I was like, oh, this is funny. I'll keep it by the door. Yeah. And I picked it up and I was standing there like.

And I got the text. Hit the guy in the head with a bat. I don't know. Who would have done that? Dude, what if the wet bandits were in my, like the Dunchkin bandits were in my house, dude? What? I mean, no. man what is worth what is worth getting in a fight with a guy over in your apartment

i don't know like a lot of my stuff my su vied