Podcast About List - The Greg Peppers Story (w. Felix Biederman, th0mas, & Yesi Rego)

Episode Date: April 6, 2020

Lying. Backstabbing. Arson. A fall from grace. A dark secret. A comedy scene torn asunder. This is the Greg Peppers Story. Follow Felix @ByYourLogic, th0mas @len0killer, and Yesi @portugi_bruja Subscribe to the Patreon for premium episodes www.patreon.com/podcastaboutlist Music Used: I Knew a Guy by Kevin MacLeodLink: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/3895-i-knew-a-guyLicense: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Lying, backstabbing, arson, a fall from grace, a dark secret, a comedy scene torn asunder, March 31st, 2020. There was one name on everyone's lips, Greg Peppers. The day before, nobody had even heard of him. What drove this middling, open-mic comedian to the top of Twitter's trending page, alongside topics like Jason Lee, and happy birthday, Kaden. Why do some claim he's the devil, or El Diablo? What did he do that dark winter's night?

Before we answer any of those questions, though, we have to tell the story from the beginning. But that's easier said than done. This is the Greg Pappner's story. Welcome to a very special episode of Podcast About List. Yeah, very special edition. Today, we do a deep dive on the life and times and crimes. Yeah, mostly crimes. Yeah.

Of Greg Peppers, one of the most notorious Boston stand-up comedians of all time. Yeah. What a story we got for you today. It's going to be insane. Yeah. Basically, we're just going to tell you the story as it stands now. Everything's subject to change. That's the nature of journalism.

We have a bunch of interviews with some people from his life and some audio that's been recovered from the scene. We won't tell you what the scene is yet. Yeah, you got to listen to the end. We'll get there. right? Yeah. Greg's childhood. Yeah.

Greg Peppers was born in Hampton Beach, New Hampshire, to parents Mark Peppers and Nicolette Peppers Rodmina. Nobody is quite sure what year he was born, and Greg, a pathological liar, gives a different age every time he's asked, ranging anywhere from 50 to 70. He has a younger brother, Walter, brother, Peppers, but we'll talk more about him later.

Greg Peppers had a tumultuous and interesting childhood that was pretty well documented, thanks to newspaper articles, neighborhood anecdotes, and his late mother's diary, which we've gained access to. So let's talk about what Greg was like growing up. What do you guys think about that? Yeah, what was Greg like grown up, you know? He's a serious figure.

A lot of our records from Greg, or on Greg's childhood, come from posts that he made on the website eBOMB's world in the early 2000s. sort of a precursor to the chive he had a lot of uh he also had a he had a very uh very well documented uh very like he updated it often it was a geocity geocity's website uh that he had uh there's actually dedicated to um the character tifa lockhart from final fantasy seven it was called it was called uh gregg peppers dot tifa lockhart boobs

dot sunset strip.giocities.com. Yeah, and he has a lot of posts on there that are really enlightening as to his state of mind growing up. Yeah. Yeah. It's really interesting kind of combing through his web history because much like Adolf Hitler, he was an artist before anything else. And it turns out we've discovered that he was actually the guy who made the realistic Homer Simpson picture. Oh, really?

Oh, wow. Well, actually, I didn't see that. Oh, yeah, my team of sleuths discovered that. And he actually, he was, he served as the inspiration for the realistic Marge Simpson picture. I walked around his neighborhood in Hampton Beach just to kind of get a feel for, like, where he was living. And I talked to some families, and I met this guy who knew him growing up, this guy, Tyler Abu Dhabi. And he had some really interesting stories to tell about kind of like the games they used to play. They used to play this game called

Find the guy. Yeah. Is that mean? Find the guy. What did they? What did? Find the guy? No, I have no idea with that.

I actually, I went to Hampton Beach a lot as a child. I think the guy that they're talking about is, well, as you know, Hampton Beach 311 does come around there a lot. They do play a lot of shows on Hampton Beach. I think the guy that they're talking about is actually the bassist from 311 peanut. It is. That actually is what Tyler.

Oh, okay. All right. Wow. They would run around and try to find... They would just look for them. When they found him, they went, there's the guy, and you don't even want to guess what happened next.

Yeah, you could tell who peanut was by his tattoos. He had a very, on his calf. He has a very large tattoo of Mr. Peanut, the Planter's Peanut. Wow. Yeah, it's actually, it's very detailed. It's actually more detailed than I think he actually used. An older, like, image. Wait, so is that where, is that where Greg Pepper's got the idea for his, his fry guy tattoo on his leg?

The McDonald's fry guy, do you think? Maybe inspired by peanut. Oh, I thought it was Frylock from, uh, from Appetian Hunger Force. Oh, okay. He has a guy on one leg and Frye lock on the other. And he has fry from Futurama on his chest, I think. He has a lot of tattoos of just various people named Frye. on his body it's very strange very strange very strange man yeah i know we're sort of putting together

the puzzle of his life yeah no that's that's the thing about this guy you you you start like talking about him you start to asking people about his life you can just kind of like piece together other things about something that i found really interesting was um uh through sort of contacting his old classmates and just old school friends. I found out that you remember those books Sideway Stories from Wayside School. Yeah. Uh-huh.

So it turns out Greg Peppers went to the Wayside School. Oh, my God. Oh, wow. Yeah, the one with the missing 11th floor. Yeah. And they had the teacher that turned the kids into apples. I wonder. Yeah, a teacher that turned the kids into Apple.

Yeah, it's, it's, again, just sort of like, I think when you're taught, when you're taught, when you're talking about these sort of criminal entities like the Menendez brothers or Casey Anthony or Greg Peppers, you start to sort of, I don't want to say empathize, but the more that you learn about where they came from, the more you can understand sort of how the math adds up. Absolutely. Okay, here's a guy went to Wayside School. you know here's a guy who his first crush was nala from the lion king and here's a guy who's

second crush was the uh the girl hyena from the lion king and why maybe that's why he ended up you know the way he did yeah no i mean actually you can draw a really clear line like you look at like oh he went to a sideways school and that could be a big reason for his infamously sideways penis that yeah yeah that too talk about yeah his penis is it's like a burrito taped to a kin doll. And I actually, I learned a lot through his chatter bait that he, actually, what he does is he takes a magnet

and he puts it into the neomodium magnet and he puts it into his meetus. And he actually takes another stronger magnet and puts it at the bottom towards his kneecaps and he just kind of he lets it hang and he comes that way. He's really a fascinating guy. Yeah, he's also a bit of an amateur scientist.

Yeah. He loves chemicals and magnets and materials What is what happened? Greg Pepper's and his dark materials I think I actually have a line here From his mother's diary Right here Oh yeah we did uncover his mother's diary

It was actually it was at a It was at a Salvation Army Which was strange Yeah yeah it was in an old Box for some Jordan 11 space jams Yeah and they were behind the counter We were just trying to buy a pair of Jordan 11 space trains.

Yeah, yeah, the originals. So, yeah, I do have a line that refers to his addiction to science, and I mean, I figure, I don't really know what her voice would have sounded like, but I can do as faithful a recreation as possible, I suppose. So, yeah.

Greg was playing with his science set today. That kid is such a fucking freak. I hate him so much. So that kind of provides a little background. maybe to... Uh-huh. Yeah, again,

again, it's making me feel, you know... I do sort of empathize with him, you know? Yeah. You think that you can't empathize with somebody this, like, you know, just... This is just abjectly evil.

But his mother goes on to say, um, um, today, he mixed together some strange chemical that filled the entire house with a green cloud. And when I woke up, it was the next week.

that's pretty a pretty interesting event so he actually came up he it's one of the biggest scientific breakthroughs uh in modern history but it was wrongly attributed to a different scientist but he actually came up with the big green cloud yeah the big green cloud that makes it next week i i do i do think that um i don't know if you guys i mean i i don't know how many mics you guys went to with him but he did say that he invented the big green cloud

to me in passing and I just I kind of wrote it off as just another one of his lies I do think I think he had a bit about that on stage he did his big green cloud bit yeah yeah but he did it in the context of you know you know slipping a big green cloud into a woman's drink

so it's much which was what he was trying to invent which is what he was trying he's successful little did he know there's tons of sort of medical uses for the big green cloud as an anesthetic he again everything that he does he uses it for evil mm-hmm what's happening for him probably get his dad on the line oh yeah we should probably call I mean we have

his dad's been on the call the whole time his dad's basically just been waiting to talk oh yeah oh Cameron is he had to leave to go um watch a movie but uh Mr Pepper's is that you

are we correct are you on the line Colleen Peppers is that you hello yeah that's me Colleen Am I saying that correctly, or is it Colin? It's Mark? Or is it Colleen? It's Mark.

It's Mark. Okay. Okay. So Greg, yeah, wow. Yeah, another one of Greg's lies. Well, you know, that's just kind of how the boy was in many ways. Can I ask you one question just right off the top? Absolutely.

Caleb and I, Caleb Cameron and I, we all thought he was somewhere between the ages of 60 to 85. I, can you Yeah, can you clarify his exact age for us? Oh, Greg, let's see, he was born in, uh, 1994, so that would make him... 94? Uh, 26. 94. We're talking about, um, we're talking about Greg Peppers in Boston.

Greg Peppers who fought... Hampton Beach? Yes, Greg Peppers from Hampton Beach who fought in Desert Storm. 26 years old. He's 26 years old? He's an old-looking little boy. Does he have mesothelioma? What the fuck is wrong with him?

He just looks like that. I don't know what to tell you guys. Is it something he does with his hair? I don't think he does anything with his hair. I don't think he's touched his hair his entire life. Is it like a Benjamin Button type thing? I don't know who that is. Like Steve Bannon?

Oh, Steve Bannon. Now there's a real gentleman Oh, you're a big Steve Bannon fan? No, I just think he's a real gentleman You just think he's a good guy? No, just a gentleman He has manners

So he's not a good guy but he's a gentleman He has manners I understand that He does just know how he knows how to wear a suit He knows what he's doing But only in a gentleman In a manner in an etiquette fashion So can you tell us a little bit about

What was it like having Greg in the home growing up Well, it was taxing absolutely it was very taxing uh he would uh he was always doing his experiments i remember uh there was this one thing he did where he actually created this uh just gigantic green cloud that uh seemed to oh you guys have heard of the green cloud oh he's he's told us about the green cloud yeah yeah he's never stops talking about it oh yeah my mental faculties never returned to what they were before the day that he created that green cloud so did you do you Did you sound like this before the green cloud?

No, I used to sound very normal. I'm from Hampton Beach. I was born in the same hospital as Greg. Really? Because you sound like you're from whatever house Hank Hill grew up in. Yeah. Yeah, that was the green cloud. I was actually watching King of the Hill when the cloud hit me

and it kind of melded our brains together, my brain into a cartoon's brain in a way. Gotcha. Okay. So that's why you have what I would describe as medically Han. Hank Hill characteristics. Hank syndrome, it's a documented kind of condition, so I was the first and second case. It happened again?

They cured it? They cured it and it happened again. It happened again and it kind of layered on top of the first time. So the first Hank syndrome compounded with the second. The first one made me sound like Hank Hill and the second one made, I look like a cartoon now. I don't have my video on because I'm two-dimensional. Because you'd need a piece of paper. I need a piece of paper.

Yeah. So you need a piece of paper behind you to be visible or else you're sort of in a flat world plane? You're kind of like Flat Stanley is what I'm getting. No. You're nothing like Flat Stanley. No, because Flat Stanley has photos of them. That's true. Flat Stanley is a book and cartoons are different from books, yes.

That's correct. I feel like we're getting a little off topic. We've called you to talk about Greg. Yeah, we talk about Greg and. Greg's comedy career now did he do so you hear stories about Jim Carrey you hear stories about Andy Dick

growing up in their house as children and they were and they would do they would do just crazy crazy things did Greg what did Greg do as a child what was Greg's thing? Oh well his main comedic styling I suppose

was flatulence in a oh yeah oh that makes sense That is definitely consistent with what we've learned about him. He would do this thing where he would run into your bedroom, or at least my bedroom. I don't know about you guys, but he would fart on you, and you would actually fall right the hell over. But, yeah, he would do the fart. You know, he did this one prank where he would go down to the kitchen in the middle of the night, and he would open up the refrigerator.

He would fart into the refrigerator and close it, trapping the fart. so when you woke up in the morning to get breakfast you would open the refrigerator the fart would fly out hit you I've heard of this I've heard of this it flies out like slimer from Ghostbusters and it attacks you

yeah so I have one question for you do you I don't know exactly to put this Mr. Peppers and again this is this is your son if you feel uncomfortable at any questions that we're asking

naturally naturally But do you love Greg? Oh, God. I would have to say, no, not at all, not even a little bit. I mean, I really just, the question there, the- Oh, my God, wow. The only reason I have been walking on eggshells. The only reason I hesitated with answering that one, yeah, I just didn't know whether

how i felt like i should pause at least a little bit before saying no course yeah it's radio you gotta ham it up a little bit yeah exactly well mr peppers it's been a pleasure talking to you yeah thank you so much thank you so much for calling in absolutely i i would take any opportunity i i could get to slander that awful you can call you can call him a monkey all right well thank you again thank you so much mr peppers talk to you next time we'll do boys so that was uh that was that was mr peppers mark peppers mr mark peppers hey guys i just finished watching the lord of the rings extended edition no fellowship of the ring what did i miss yeah hey uh care turns out his name was not

coline peppers like we thought what was it colin i told you was colin dude no it was actually just mark oh yeah mark yeah i think it was maybe it was a uh Gaelic spelling or something. Yeah. Oh, you know those Irish. They're crazy. Yeah, they always fuck it up. What's happening for him?

He also claimed that he was radicalized on the side of Nikola Tesla against Thomas Edison without ever having read the oatmeal. Really? Wow. Yeah. That's impressive. I mean, that's the mark of a true scientist. He claimed to have independently come to that point of view without ever having read

the oatmeal. Yeah, I heard he knew all about the dude. different color spectrums that a mantis shrimp was able to see and without even reading a single web comic in his life and I heard he could also make snarky jokes about the periodic table without even looking at XKCD I heard uh I heard that he knew that George Bush loved oil before read it ever reading a power up comic yeah and I heard he knew who SpongeBob was without watching the show and that's one that really blew my mind he actually he told me that

He knew about six retards who were secret geniuses without having ever read Crack.com. Really? Yeah. Oh, that's crazy. He independently came up with a list of six, and he never, he said, he did. I said, crack.com, and he said,

I was always more of a Mad Magazine guy. In addition to live interviews with people close to the situation, we've also acquired witness testimony from two local comedians. Thomas O'Shea. Name's Tom O'Shea. I'm a Boston comedian. And an unnamed female comedian. My name is Jesse Rigo, and I am a former Boston comic. Their stories help us piece together what it was like

to perform alongside Greg in the Boston comedy scene. So I used to host this women's mic called Hilarious. I host an open mic every Wednesdays, Muya burgers, fries and shakes, maybe you've heard of it, I don't know. You know, not a big deal, kind of a big deal. I didn't say you said it, that type of stuff. It was only supposed to be women comedians. But Greg showed up and watched all of the comedians with binoculars.

At some point during the mic, he took out a laser pointer and started drawing figure eights on my chest while I was performing. In the middle of my set, he just starts pointing a laser pointer directly in my eye and starts shouting like times up, times up. Like he's fucking, fucking Harvey Weinstein shit or whatever. When I was about to introduce the last comedian of the night, Greg rushed the stage. He runs on stage in the middle of my set, and he grabs the microphone and says doing his fucking act. Grab the microphone, said school sucks. And to top it all off, the cherry on the fucking Sunday is that I'm standing there and he's doing his act. And as he's doing it, he rips fucking ass right in my face.

It was so fucking hot. I like fell over. Then farted on me and I fell over. I don't know if he shot at himself, like put a little poo. in there and you know honestly like part of me it was fucking rip shit because i was there to work out some new killer you know child support bits about my fucking bitch wife and i got fucking upstage but you know if i'm being completely truthful pepper's fucking killed that night people were fucking falling out of their chairs laughing

every single fucking person there was dying Greg killed that night And I didn't So we actually have On the line right now Hey I gotta go I gotta go to the movies real quick

I was in the middle of announcing All right no I know I know I'm sorry I just I really got to go to the movies What do you what movie you see? I mean we're on like lockdown I'm gonna see the beach movie I'm okay the beach movie

I'm not beach bum the beach movie shut up dude okay I'm gonna go to the movie alright alright bye Pat see you man I hate Patrick so yeah I want the line right now we have Greg Pepper's high school metal shop teacher I believe his name was

what was it again my name is Daniel de Lesbo Daniel Delezbo Hey how you doing Mr. DeLesbo I'm doing pretty good how are you doing Pretty good. Yeah. So what years of school were you Greg's teacher?

I was Greg's teacher for one month. He had to take him out of my classroom. He was very, very disruptive. On the first day of class, he took a piece of rebar, and he hit a Chinese kid in the head with it. And it was very bad. Wow. Interesting.

But you said, what kind of class was this again? This was a metals class? Metal. Medals. So it's a metal-ergy? Metal-ergy class. It was like wood shop, but with metal. So you guys, do you make, what kind of stuff do you make in this class?

You know, we do a lot of iron casts. We do our, well, aluminum casts. What was your experience with Greg? What, first day of class? What was your first impression of Greg? I already told you, first day of class. Greg hit that kid over the head with a, piece of rebar.

Yeah, Chinese kid. Yeah, he hit the only, the school's only Chinese kid. And what was that child's name? His name was Michael Kwan. Second day of class. So, I mean,

right off the bat, Greg showed me that he was not mature enough to be in the class, but, you know, I told, I said, I'm going to give this kid

a second chance. Second day of class. Greg pulls out a big piece of sheet metal, and I see him. He's got a big, he's got one of those big, sharpies he's pulling it out and uh he's drawing what looks like the buster sword from final

fantasy seven and uh yeah i know it well yeah yeah and he so he took uh he took a sharpie drew a buster sword out of a piece of 24 by 24 sheet metal uh cut it out and uh well i mean it wasn't sharp enough thank god but he did poke my ass with it and i did it did break skin so so So Greg, in your class, he made a big sword and he poked your ass with it? Greg poked my ass with a big sword, and to this day, it feels like I got two assholes. Oh my God, interesting.

He went up in me like they did to Gaddafi. So he MoMar Gaddafi'd you. Yeah, he did, he was watching a lot of Tosh Point O at the time, and he did do the Daniel Tosh viral Gaddafi prank. Yeah. Just a terrible, terrible child. I did tell him, his mom showed have aborted him and I did get in a lot of trouble for that,

but just the worst student who ever had. The teacher said his mom should have had an abortion. He would storm into the classroom like his name was El Nino while he was hanging out drinking in the back of his El Camino. That's what he did. And this is when he was a kid? This was when he was 14.

Interesting. He was a skid. No one in the class knew his name until day two. Until day two? Uh huh. We got, we were getting reports. Hold on, I'm getting a report in my earpiece right now that he actually crashed his own house party because nobody came.

Oh, my God. Is that true? Is that a true, is that a, is that a, that's how like him? I'm one of the teachers at the school, I can't confirm, but that sounds like him. That sounds like some nerd shit he would do. Yeah. And look, I love all my students.

Just the one student I'd never, never been able to, never been able to connect with was Greg Peppers. Did you ever, did you punish him? I believe I did. Was this at the Wayside School? This was at the Wayside School, yes. And Corporal Punishment is allowed at Wayside School? It was allowed.

I did punish him by welding the zipper on his pants shut so he couldn't go pee in the bathroom. Well, yeah, I suppose he could still go pee. Oh, he could pee in his pants. That's what he could do. So what was the last straw? What you said he was in your class for a month? You know, first month of class, everything's going fine, and we had the hang-ups for the two days. the first two days were a mess

I'll say that I'll say that the first two days were a mess but then it's fine after that fine after that until day 29 day 29 day 29 what month was this

this was February February okay and you know day 29 Greg I finally see what he's been working on and it is a an aluminum cast sculpture of him fucking

my wife. Wow. I don't know where he found a photo of my wife. Was it life size? It was life size, and I did respect it. However, you do not use my tools to fuck my wife

in metal. I mean, do you ever think that maybe he didn't, maybe it wasn't from a photo that he got the reference? No. Did you ever think that maybe Greg became all too familiar with your wife body and maybe he didn't even need a cast?

I mean, it wouldn't, it wouldn't surprise me at this point in my life. Would surprise, are you still, are you and your wife still together? Yeah, I don't know where she is. You're together, but you don't know where she is? Nope. Okay. Legally, we're together. Yeah, but she's been gone for how long now?

Three hours. She's been gone. Oh, okay. She's been gone for three hours. Yeah. and you don't, and you're not sure that she'll ever come back? No. What was the last thing she said before she left?

I'm going to the store. Oh, okay. It has been three hours. How far away is the store? About 20 minutes. Okay, you have reason to believe that she might be gone. I mean, you know. Oh.

Oh, she's back. Oh, thank God. I'm happy for you, man. That was a close one. That was close. You almost lost your wife. wife, dude. Yeah, now that she's here, could you call out to her real quick and ask if she

ever became intimate with Greg Peppers? Absolutely not. I cannot ask. No, when she gets back from the store, she needs to lie down for at least three hours. Can you wake her? Why? Does she have some sort of medical condition? Let's just talk about, let's just talk about Greg. When is the last

time you saw Greg? A day before graduation, and he handed me an envelope. I said, fuck you. And I've never said that to a student before, but I look him in the eyes, I put my finger in his chest, and I poked harder than I've ever poked, and I said, fuck

you, Greg Peppers, and I took the envelope out of his hand, and I left it in my desk drawer, and I haven't opened it since. You want to, you want to pull that out for us? All right, I'm going to open it right now. Oh, Jesus. What is it?

It's a picture of a horse's ass. Ah. And he's fucking the horse's ass. Greg is? Greg is? Greg is. Greg is. Greg gave you a picture of him fucking a horse's ass. Jesus.

It's my wife's mayor. So you, okay, so you have a horse. It's a photo of Craig Pepper's fucking my wife's mayor. Wow. You still have this horse? Yeah, it's in the garage. What are you going to do with it? It's in the garage?

Uh-huh. Wow. Is it okay in there? Yeah, I live in a condo. I can't, I don't have the proper stable. We don't, so one last question, Ed, do you, has, I don't really know how to put this without kind of leading you to the answer that I want. Has, has Greg ever made you fall over? Oh boy. Okay, so I think there's something I didn't want to talk about, but I mean, it did happen, so I feel I should, feel as though I should talk about it. Please do, yeah. He took, he took the welding torch, and he held it up to his hind end, and he let out a fart so, so big. uh knocked me over and that's why i don't have eyebrows all right thank you mr de lesbo thank you thank you so much for your time hey guys i just got i just got back from the beach movie oh man how was it

was that a was that a 17 minute movie so how'd the call with the gym teacher or whatever go i think gregg fucked his wife and his wife's horse and his horse lives in a garage that's crazy that's a triple whammy if you ask me what fuck his wife fucked his wife's horse and the horse lives in a garage. Yeah, where's the wife live? The garage. The garage? The wife lives in the stable. Wow. Yeah, that's how it should work. My wife is in the garage. The garage. And I'm in the living room and I got a 50-inch curved TV and I'm watching a family guy. I'm watching Wheel

of Fortune and I'm yelling the answers out to myself. And I'm grilling in the living room. Yeah. I brought my George Foreman into the living room just so I could feel. in the damn bathtub. I got a chimney. I got a grill chimney full of hot charcoal. And I'm throwing it on my wife's rug. And I'm coughing. And the room is filling with smoke and I'm passing out.

Okay, so this is actually really exciting. We sent a letter by snail mail to Walter Brother Peppers, Greg Pepper's brother's brother, who's, I believe, has been living off the grid for quite a while. And nobody's really been able to get in contact with him. But we got him to respond to this letter. He actually used his personal tape recorder and sent us a tape of like a statement. Yeah, I heard that Walter Brother Peppers is living in the charred remains of G.G. Islands home in Littleton, New Hampshire. That's also what I heard, and that's where I sent the letter to contact him.

Yeah, it was mostly just a guess, and then we got something back. I mean, and is, am I crazier, is that like the wettest envelope you've ever touched? Oh, oh, it was yellow and it was wet. It smells like a marker. But it wasn't like, it was too. viscous to be piss. Yeah, no, it's some substance. I don't know what it was.

It might have been polenta. All right, well, let's pop this bad boy in and see what Brother Peppers has to say. I remember the first time I saw my brother, Greg Peppers. I was a baby, as was he. I looked at him. He was breakdancing. I said, damn, this white boy crazy as hands. hell.

And I'll never forget that one time when that one crazy white boy killed a Chinese dude with a brick. Yeah, I remember the day like it was yesterday. We were walking through the town looking for a bite for all my other folks who are not familiar with the term, but that I mean we were looking for a restaurant at which we could obtain a meal. Now Greg Peppers ain't eat his meals like a regular motherfucker, no? He'd go and he'd eat the whole goddamn meal with a loaded pistol. He'd pull the pistol out, he'd sprinkle some, you know, some ground beef,

things of that nature, on the pistol, and then he'd suck the tip of the pistol like a penis and that's just the type of motherfucker he was but anyway we were at this restaurant this Chinese restaurant to be specific not related to the story at hand it just happened to be a Chinese restaurant and this motherfucker Greg happened to be eating a meal and his standard fashion he was he was sucking the noodles off a pistol like it was a grown man's penis and this dude came up to him who happened to be Chinese now did he work there that's not something you can assume from the given story there's a lot of ways to look at it but he said he said to Greg and I am quoting him here I'm not using any sort of accent

he said to Greg Peppers he said And that's what I'm not going to do that's And that motherfucker Greg, you know He wasn't going to take no disrespect like that You know Greg came through with that Pistol

And I'm not talking about the one he sucked off Like a penis for all his meals Nah He came through with that shoddy too and he pulled it out and in the stock of it what did he have but a brick

signed by none other than Mark Walbart he pulled that motherfucker around and he just started bashing and bashing and you fucking

he kept bashing and bashing and bashing and there was fucking bud everywhere you could see it all over the fucking restaurant and everybody's screaming

everybody's screaming oh no no you gotta stop him you gotta stop him you can't let it happen you can't let it happen and i let it happen as my brother i'm not gonna stop him but anyway so he finished his meal right and i'm looking i'm waiting for the police to come right now i'm saying red peppers what are we gonna do and then he farted on me and i fell over okay i don't know what the fuck that was about yeah that i i'm almost certain that was not that guy had no relation to gregg yeah i don't think that i think he read the letter and then just kind of kind of made

something up yeah i don't know who the fuck that i feel really stupid for playing that on the show that was kind of me too i'm not sure i want to associate with geez yeah i'm bummed that we're recording this whole thing live to tape yeah so we can't make any edits yeah there's no way It's unedited and raw. Yeah, it's like Jimmy Kimmel. Yeah, you know, I'm actually, I think I'm going to send an anonymous tip to the police about that guy's cabin. I just... What are you even going to say?

I just say there's a... I don't know. I'm going to send them that... Hey, a guy was extremely weird. Tell them that that's G.G. Allen's Old House. They'll get over there with the friggin' hazmat's team. Yeah, they'll go Waco on G.G. Allen's old house. They'll go scrub that shit all the poop off the walls.

Yeah, I'm going to have the ATF go. Waco and G.G. Allen's widow. They're going to send a damn AT-A-T. Yeah. They're going to send they're going to send they're going to send the... They're going to send Judge Dredd and Robocop

joined at the hip, baby. They're going to send... Siamese robots. They're going to send a tank man from the... from the Tiananmen Square Massacre because he's the only thing stronger than a tank.

He has ever been to his apartment? He has this apartment in East east boston or had he had this apartment yeah yeah it was it was under it was underneath a mexican grocery store and uh i go in one day because um he's buying weed for me because he's very easy to rip off and i asked if i could use his bathroom and i went into the bathroom and i uplifted the the toilet seat and um it was a it was a full coy pond in the toilet in the toilet in the toilet bowl and really go yeah what what yeah why yeah i'd win in a yeah where else am i supposed to go i mean you could have got what you want me to go in the sink there was another

coy pond in the sink and the bathtub i can't he had he had that many how can he afford i mean and then when i walked out i said hey i was like hey uh from what i remember he worked at subway i don't know how he could afford that many coy fish i'm sure they just swam up yeah well that's possible Yeah, and then I sold him a gram for $260. Nice. Oh, that was the best. I mean, the best thing I ever did was I sold one Adderall pill to him for $300. Yeah.

Yeah. I remember that. And I know he came up to me at a mic and he was like, I'm about to fucking crush tonight. And I was like, why? And he was like, have you seen Limitless? And I said, no. And he was like, okay, that makes this really hard to explain. plane then, and then he walked away, and he just ate

shit on stage. Yeah. I sold him, I picked grass off the ground, and he was standing right next to me. He saw me do it, and he bought it off me for $500. Damn. Wow. Told him it was a joint. I didn't even put it in anything. It was literally just blades of grass in the palm of my hand.

He tried to smoke it. I talked to one of his childhood friends, and he said that he, when they would walk around their neighborhood, he was the kid who would always eat the berries that nobody knew what they were, that were growing on bushes and stuff. I mean, that's a scientist behavior. You know, you have to investigate.

He's testing the hypothesis or will these berries kill me? I did, I did one time. I sold him, I sold him an ounce of nutmeg rolled in a post-it note. What did you say it was? Oh, I told him straight up, it's just nutmeg in a post-it note. What did he pay for it? He paid $250. So now on the line we have, I believe,

Greg's old co-worker from Subway, where he used to work? Wait, wait, before we interview this guy, I got to pop out. I just, I'm going to go see a movie. Oh, Rick, man, what movie? I'm going to go see a hateful eight, but just the first part. Okay.

Yeah, just the first part before the intermission. before the intermission. I think that's like, but it does have the, it's gonna, we're gonna watch the first part and then have the intermission and then leave. Okay. Oh, okay. That sounds good to me.

All right, bye, bye you guys. Have fun, man. Yeah, I'll see you in a bit. Yeah, so we have, um, Danny from, uh, subway. Hey. Oh, hey, Danny. This is the subway at, um, where, which subway did you work at with Greg?

We worked at the subway on Tramont Street. Come give us a visit. Mm-hmm. Okay, so when did, When did Greg start Greg Pepper start working at Subway

with you, Danny? Probably about a year and a half ago. He said that he worked at Subway for 20 years. Yeah, he told me he'd be working at Subway

for 50 years. He worked there for six months tops. Really? Yeah, see, I was his assistant manager,

and we had this total bitch of a manager, Carly. She was a real bitch about when we would bring home the ingredients, she would get real mad

and she just got fed up with him Uh-huh Yeah she always had it out for Greg Because he could never remember What BMT stood for? Really? Yeah he one time What does BMT stand for?

Bacon Um Meat Okay And turkey Yeah That's delicious But he would tell

That's very good. He would sometimes just tell people it was what you call the guys in the ambulance. Oh. Then people wouldn't order it after he told them that. Well, he would say it was named after them because they were the real heroes at a world. Oh. Okay. Yeah.

Okay. Uh-huh. How was it working with him? Honestly, he was like the perfect guy for me to work with because he, he, he looked. loved having a good time, you know? Yeah, like sometimes we would put all the ham on our face, like that one episode of The Office with Dwight. I remember that one.

Yeah, and we would do that. I remember that episode with Dwight. Yeah, and we would do that Dwight face to each other. That's pretty cool. We thought it was pretty funny. So Greg, how did Greg interact with, how was he with customers? He was incredible with customers. He was like the kid.

Really? He was like the king of movie trivia. Yeah? Yeah, the customers, the customers would try to, try to, like, order, you know, like Italian herbs and cheese with tuna, and he would be like, did you know that one of the midgets from Wizard of Oz killed themselves on set? Wow. And I would be in the back trying to toast the bread,

and I would get so distracted by his facts that I couldn't even toast it anymore. You couldn't toast it? No, I get so distracted. Uh-huh. Like I was saying, he was a great employee, in my opinion. Obviously, Carly disagreed. But he always... Carly.

Carly was our manager. Carly was your manager, but specifically, what about Carly was so bad? She was mostly just like a stupid bitch. The only cool thing is she had like some really cool tattoos. Like she had, like on her back, she had sophisticated ignorance written in cursive on her back. which I thought was pretty cool. When did you see her back? When I had sex with her doggy style in the ass.

Oh, cool. Good for you, man. Yeah. We were together for a little bit. It's not a humongous deal, but we had sex a humongous amount of times. Did you ever put your dick in a bread roll and give it to her as a sub? That was basically all we did. Oh, okay.

Yeah, and I started calling her my girlfriend from that, but she said that I was just the meat between the buns on her sandwiches. That sucks, man. I'm sorry. Yeah, it was one of the most heartbreaking things ever, and that's why I appreciated Greg so much because he was there for me in that trying time. Is there any reason why Greg stopped working at the subway?

Yeah, apparently he gave away over $25,000 in BLTs to, Oh, my God. To the Boston Police Department. Yeah, but when he got fired, he was really torn up, and he said, hey, come over, man. Like, we got a, like, I can't be alone right now. Maybe I'll do something insane. And I was like, yeah, man, for sure. So I brought, like, my 15 favorite DVDs that I had burned on my favorite clips of Dennis Miller.

And I came over at his house, and I popped those things in the PS3 that we only use for DVDs. And we watched those things. and we howled at the moon. You howled at the moon. Yeah, because we was laughing so hard. You and Greg are big Dennis Miller fans. I think Greg was heavily... Dennis Miller is the king!

I think Greg was heavily influenced by Dennis Miller in his comedy. Yeah, did you ever see Greg do comedy? Did you ever do mics with Greg, or... I mean, I knew he was a funny guy, but I honestly never knew he did comedy until right now. Really? Oh. Although, I guess that makes sense,

because he did try to start. an open mic in the subway that we worked at. Really? Yeah, he tried... Was it just comedy, or was it comedy and music? It was comedy music. He said that it was comedy, music, and wet t-shirt contests. And how did it go?

Did people come? No, not the people he wanted. It was mostly comedians and musicians. He called it the Pepperthon. Uh-huh. Yeah. And what brought the open... Why did you stop doing it?

um because one time uh um somebody got stuck in the bread that's i'm so sorry it's okay he died he died instantly he died instantly his name that's terrible he was a comedian um i believe his name was josh goldstein that's terrible for him gosh goldstein yeah he was he was so small he was only he was He's only six inches, so he fit in half of one of our loaves. Oh, okay. What was the last time you saw Greg? Um, I saw Greg at a third eye blind concert, um, at the, uh, at the TD Garden about six

weeks ago. Uh-huh. Oh, six weeks ago, that recent. Yeah, and I was on, I was on Molly, and he was on hamburgers, and we just, it just was not a vibe that mixed. um from your i mean not to pull from um you know your you're online i'm sorry if that's private but um it says here on a post you made on on your uh facebook story it says here um yo i'm at td garden i'm in the bathroom i'm sucking gregg pepper's dick

this shit's crazy uh and then it says i wish you would step back hashtag i wish you would step back from that ledge my friend and then it says sincerely danny delicious yeah who is that are you is that like your alter ego um is that your gay alter ego no i have no idea who i've i've uh i've never heard of a danny i mean your name is danny it could have been a different danny um there's a million i think i've looked at the facts and there's a million dany's and um but this was on your account Yeah, Danny, I mean, Danny, I'm looking right here. There's a photo of you, smiling, there's a drip coming out of your mouth. It's extremely possible that I had, I had maybe shared the post, because I thought it was so funny to imagine two men, two men having sex.

It is a photo, it is a photo of you in all, all 1.6 inches of Greg's penis in your mouth. It's four inches. I mean, one point, I mean, whatever it's, you know, whatever it looks like, I guess. Um, what's that? Oh, uh, oh, there's a guy. There's a guy over here who needs me for something. I'm sure there is a guy who needs you for something, pal. No, he, yeah, no, he, no, I'm sorry, no, I'm sorry, there's actually a girl, there's two girls.

There's a hunt, there's, no, there's two girls who are here, and they, and they are asking, they want to have sex with me, so I kind of got to go to do that. Oh, okay. All right, go have fun, go have fun, Danny Delicious. Thanks, Danny Delicious. I can't wait. Thanks for, thanks for talking to me. me about what was his name again? Girl Peppers

Greg Peppers was good talking about... No, it was Greg Peppers, he was your co-worker, you said he was your best friend. You sucked his dick, yeah, Greg Peppers. It was good to talk to guys about him. Did something happen to your head? What happened between you and Greg, why did you... Nothing happened. Nothing happened at the third eye

phone number. Nothing happened, no, he didn't pay me in nachos to suck his dick at the Third Eye Blonde concert. That doesn't make any sense. Do you say how Craigs? sounding you sound I guess you're right man I guess that's a good point now if you excuse me I have to go suck these two women's pussies off all right man thank you I'll see you at star us subway thank you Danny delicious subway manager Danny delicious that is not my name and uh what's your last name Danny uh disantis

Danny DeSantis Cuban Cuban American It is good for me Actually I have you know My name is not Danny delicious Does that sound like a Cuban last name to you

Yeah Cubanos are very delicious to me Okay this has been a joke And you too should be ashamed Of what you're doing to these people I'm sorry Listen I'm sorry We may have push you a little too hard.

I was told that you guys were making a happy birthday Greg Pepper's audio file to send to him and you wanted to interview me about it. Is that what Caleb told you? Huh? Caleb told you was a happy birthday thing? Caleb told me you guys were going to put a bunch of clips of his friends saying happy birthday

and you were going to send it to him. I was going to wait till the end. Duh! I thought you maybe you guys wanted to get to know me a little bit. All right. Well, you can say happy birthday now. Okay. All right.

Will you let me get a couple seconds of clean air so you guys can cut it right? All right. Go ahead. Okay. Happy birthday to Greg. Happy birthday to Greg. I'm going to have to restart now. Just get out of here, man.

Go. Happy birthday, Greg. Pat, can we kick this guy off the call, please? All right, yeah, you're out of. Yeah, you're done, man. We should go to another third-upon concert sometime. Oh, thank God he's gone. Oh, Caleb's back.

Oh, my God, dude. Sometimes I forget how good the first part of that movie is. And you were seeing that, you were seeing that on. 70 millimeter at the Quiznos Ample Theater? Yeah, yeah, I saw it in Smelovision. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So you can...

Oh, then that's the Jimmy John's Ample Theater. Anyway, how'd the interview with Subway Guy go? Not great. Yeah, I guess he's, like, sucked Greg Pepper's dick at some concert. Yeah, for nachos at a third-eye blind concert? You know, I don't think he did. I think he did.

I just have a hunch of it on Facebook. Yeah, I mean, I mean, who know? Under his stage name, Danny Delicious. People know how to do a lot of stuff on Photoshop now. You know, I was a pretty big fan of Gregs. That all changed when I booked them on the St. Patrick's Day show. He's set at the last milieu show? Where do I even begin with that?

Straight up, I have no idea why Tom booked him. Greg has a real unique way of doing comedy. He's absolutely fucking hysterical. And basically all he does is he farts on you and you fall over. Some people hate it. Some people love it. I think it's genius. When I got to the venue, there were like 10 people with signs

protesting against Greg being on the show. I think I remember. I remember Patrick Doran being there, and I might be remembering this wrong, but I'm pretty sure he was wearing a diaper. Okay, all right, uh, I can explain that. I had a thing going on with my stomach. Okay, I didn't. I don't care at all. I feel like the people, I don't care at all. Nobody cares. No, no, no, no, no, no. Can we just go back to the interview, please? No, no, the point is you were, you were diaper. I didn't. Okay, Jesse, continue. Anyway, so Greg is bombing, and I mean fucking bombing. Like, worse than I've seen him bomb.

And it was like, he was up on stage doing his material, his usual shit. Some puns, some limerick, some songs, some props, classic Peppers. And it, it wasn't going too great. I don't think I can ever remember a time when that room was that quiet, like ever. And then, and then Greg decided to pull out his secret weapon. So he decides he's gonna do the closer early, so he gets up on the stool and he's trying to sit on it like a baby in a changing station, but it can't support his way, and he just keeps falling over and over and over. And that's when it happened. And just like Obama said, if you like your healthcare, you can keep it.

Oh, what, that's not fucking funny to you? That's not funny to you? I don't, I don't know what to do then. I don't know what to fucking, all right, you know what? You know what, you know what, I can, you guys don't think I'm funny? Well, here's something that'll get you laughing. All right, let me just get up. Up on, up on a stool.

And that's the only audio that was recovered from that night. When his set wasn't going his way, Greg Peppers lit one of his patented farts on fire with an Eric Cartman Zippo lighter that had been illegally modified to produce a larger flame. Because he had already been farting throughout the night, the basement was so saturated with methane that the flame instantly caused a massive explosion. Greg's fart explosion killed two and injured 27. It completely destroyed Muya burgers and fries, turning a cultural landmark into a vacant lot strewn with debris and limbs. To put it simply, he farted on the building and it fell over.

Many are calling this event the Boston Marathon bombing. Some say this name has already been taken, and to pick another one. But we hear at podcast about lists believe in calling it like it is. And that night was a marathon of mayhem. Greg's body was never recovered from the wreckage. and the police believe he is still at large. He went up in me like, like they did to Gaddafi. He just looks like that, I don't know what to tell you guys.

Yeah, he was like the king of movie trivia. time he did a set where he literally just ripped off old Carlos Menzia material and everyone was confused because he kept calling himself a cholo if you're pissing people off that means you're probably doing something right i think m&m said that so there it is the story of Greg Peppers. A whirlwind of laughter, tears, noxious fumes, and childhood neglect. There were those who adored Greg Peppers, and there were those who despised him. But everyone could agree he made a lasting impact on the faces of both the Boston comedy scene and the many victims who perish in the basement of that Moya, Burger, and Fries. While many came forward

with their stories, there are undoubtedly millions of others affected by his crimes and his farts. If you have a story to share about Greg Peppers, please reach out to us. If you have any information regarding the whereabouts of Greg Peppers, please reach out to the police at their Greg Peppers hotline, 213-458-8-8-170. Remember, no story truly ever ends. And Greg Peppers is still out there somewhere, farting on people and making them fall over. Maybe one day, you'll find yourself waiting in line in subway, confused about what BMT stands for,

and maybe he'll get an unmistakable whiff of Greg's scent, a highly potent cocktail of seafood, baby powder, and the inside of a DVD case. Maybe he'll be standing right there behind the register. And maybe, just maybe, he'll fart on you, and you'll fall over. Thank you.