Podiots - Podiots: Episode 121 - As a Treat

Episode Date: May 2, 2023

Ben makes a pilgrimage, Peter's fallen out of a plane and Mikey's ape has escaped. Donate £3 or more to get a shoutout and join the Pod Squad! - https://podiots.com/ Visit our shop! - https://vidiotsofficial.com/shop ------------------- Subscribe for more and TELL YOUR FRIENDS! Support Ben and Peter: https://www.youtube.com/teamtriplejump YouTube: https://youtube.com/vidiotsofficial Podiots: https://vidiotsofficial.com Pod Squad: https://podiots.com Shop: https://vidiotsofficial.com/shop Twitch: https://twitch.tv/vidiotsofficial Twitter: https://twitter.com/VidiotsOfficial Facebook: https://facebook.com/vidiotsofficial Discord: https://vidiotsofficial.com/discord/ Site: https://vidiotsofficial.com/ Follow the gang on Twitter: Ben: @Confused_Dude Peter: @ThatPeterAustin Michael: @ParrotBoy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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during the Volvo Fall Experience event. Conditions supply, visit your local Volvo retailer or go to explorevolvo.com. Maybe it's Mabelaine is such an iconic piece of music. Hit the track. Everyone in the studio that I worked on this jingle with all had like childhood stories or memories. Yeah, we're around either watching these commercials on TV

or sitting with our moms while they were doing their makeup and it became really personal for us. Maybe it's Babelaine. Maybe it's Maple Lane. It's a beautiful day. Is it? Can you, can you, come on, can you do the instruments with me? Someone big guitar day, yeah.

It's a beautiful day. I don't know the lyrics after that bit. I don't really know how the tune even. How can I play? What can I do? Just bang that drum, Ben. Okay. Don't let it get away.

Yeah, that's right. I can't even name the title that song. What is it? Who is it? Beautiful day, presumably. It's you too, I think, is it? Yeah, it is you too. God, why did I open this podcast with a rendition of you two?

What a monster. You're like, what was it? The iPhone or? No, I don't even know. Oh, why did I bring this up? iTunes. iTunes, when everyone got, a U2 album forced upon them and everyone

got very upset can't even sell free U2 albums do they still make music I don't know I'm not sure Do you know anyone who's a U2 fan No No

It's weird It seems to be one of the Well were one of the biggest bands ever But I can't find Name a single person who likes them No No I mean is U2 touring 2023?

Yeah Wow Yeah but I mean Pete everyone still touring. Amy bought tickets for me and her to go and see Brian Adams last year, but we didn't go in the end because I think, I can't remember what happened, but we couldn't go. But I was like, oh, is Brian Adams still touring? All these people who are, I'm not saying they're too old to do it, like that they should be dead, but like I'd have given up, I'd have been like, okay, I've got my millions. I'm now just going to live in my mansion. But I guess

love of it, Peter. Yeah, exactly. They love it that much. Just like Podiat's, we've got our millions, but we carry on regardless. We do. We could have retired in 2018, but we didn't. No. We should have done. We just changed. Yes, yes. They had an album in 2023 called Songs of Surrender.

Oh, it's an album of re-recorded songs. Oh, that's cheating, isn't it? The Edge. Bono. Look at his fucking face and his little round glasses. Shut up, Bono. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That was another one, wasn't it? That's enough you two talk.

Can we please get on to the blobs and whatever nonsense is coming our way this week? Yeah, I'm sure. I think we could still talk about YouTube for at least another 20 minutes if you wanted to. What's your favourite YouTube song? Come on, let's make this a you two episode. Screw the things. We're going through the entire discography. We will.

Beautiful Day is pretty good. Vertigo. Yeah, Vertigo is certainly a song. With or without you's pretty good. Yeah, with or without. He's all right. I certainly know that one. What's the one get on your book?

boots, your sexy boots, you remember that? Ooh. Don't just bring the vertigo time. Get on your boots. Yeah, it's called Get on your boots. It doesn't make any sense. Can I petition that we now start every Poddiot's episode

by posting a photo of a member of you too onto Twitter rather than Mr. Blobby? I think that would be a much or entertaining thing. We'd run out. Yeah, I think we would. Almost immediately. How many previous members are there? Three, four. I want to say four, but there might be some like past drummers or something that we could...

Yeah, there'll be those people that were there for three months and played the accordion and then I never spoken of again. Yeah, I think so. Hey, do you guys want some get on your boots lyrics? Oh yes, please. Yeah, tell me about them boots. It makes perfect sense. Hey, sexy boots. Get on your boots, yeah. Free me from a dark dream. Candy floss, ice cream. All the kids are screaming, but the ghosts aren't real. Here's what we've got to be. Love and community. Laughter is eternity. If joy is... real and it goes on women are the future all the big revelations i got a submarine you've got gasoline i don't want to talk about wars between nations not right now sexy boots no no no no

get on your boots yeah not right now foxy boots and it continues that's um incredible it's a bad song i'd recommend looking it up 2009 don't need to now it's like robbie williams level lyricism. I mean, I like Robbie Williams though, but not Bono. I seem to really have it out for Bono and I'm currently sat here scrolling through Google images, trying to find funny images of him. Sadly, they're all very serious. Why don't you like Bono?

He gets a lot of flack because he did a lot of campaigning and stuff and he probably still does. Honestly, I don't know why I don't like him. I think I've just been infected by the hive mind. No one else likes Bono, so therefore I don't like Bono and I'm just quite happy to lead into that. I don't like

his stupid cowboy hat and his stupid glasses that's what i was going to say his glasses are a bit silly aren't they yeah and his hat silly oh look at that guy's silly hat look at that guy yeah what a dude what a dude what a dude what a man okay i think we can oh bono sunglasses on ebay oh the actual stop it you'll buy one $40 last one 29 sold i've got to buy it no you can't because then you'll put them on and you'll be bono you'll be a dude then You've instantly become a dude with those shades. You can't.

We can't lose you, Michael. It would give us one more photo that we could potentially post on a future episode, you know, when we're doing YouTube members, Michael Johnson. Michael Johnson. You got some time. Michael's Bonson. Fuck's sake. Okay, I think we can go now.

Sure. Wow, six minutes. Quality. Let's go. Hello everybody and welcome to Poddy. It's the official Vidiots podcast. It's a conversational podcast where we take some questions from you at home and obey the law of the three us. Where everybody brings a thing along to talk about.

I'm Ben. I'm Peter. And I'm Michael. Hello chaps. Hello. Good evening. It's been a few weeks, but we're back. we're ready to rock and roll um easter came and went did you guys get your eggs uh yeah i got

two eggs i think yeah i did not indulge in a single easter egg now i come to think of it that's actually wow i missed out on the discount eggs as well i totally fucked it i always miss out on the discount eggs like i i like the idea of getting all the discount eggs on easter monday and then i just never do um did you have it did you have a good bounty Ben? I had three eggs, actually. Which is very exciting. Someone very generously gifted us some at work.

Yeah, I got off from work. And then I was sent some Easter egg money by my parents, so I bought a couple of eggs and headbutted those bad boys. Headbutted one, I ate one in bed because I'm luxurious like that. And it sort of, as expected, kind of exploded a little bit. and little flex of chocolate went on my on my bare chest as I lay down and then when I stood up I was like oh my god what is what are these like freckles that I've never had before and you know what what delicious little treats for me oh yum yum for later though not let them get good and dry and then

you can pick them off and have a little nibble on your chest chest chocolate yeah chocolate buttons I thought I thought you're going to say that you know you just got it on like the bed sheets and stuff because we i did that on our sofa i had uh we've got like we've got the same sofa as you ben like a dark gray one yeah from ikea and um i of course was eating white chocolate eggs because i'm racist and um getting white chocolate on a gray dark gray sofa is not it's not good yeah it's really bad can't be doing that uh is it still in there you still got a stain in there no it did it came off with hot soapy water but that's good yeah glad to hear that i'm gonna throw my sofa out when I move. It's barely, it's barely a sofa at this point. Yeah. Just a heads up for those of you

that, that have that identical mass-produced IKEA sofa that's an L-shape, where one corner lifts up and you can store bedding in it and stuff. Don't disassemble and move with it. Doesn't work. Once it's together, it can never be disassembled and put back together. It can be disassembled, and you can put it back together, but it's life is, it's limited at that point. The more you take it apart and rebuild it the worse it gets. As with many things I suppose but ours is the same. We've moved it. It's moved between

about three or four different places because my sister had it briefly and it's been all over the country that sofa. Every time it's deconstructed it loses a little bit of its soul. It's never the same sofa again. Per thing. What's it called? Peter? You'll know.

The ship of Thebes. Theseus? Or triggers broom. people also say yeah yeah if you slowly start replacing bits of it until none of it the original sofa remains is it still the same sofa oh is it still the doesn't fucking matter anyway if you want to support this kind of nonsense so we can move on to the questions and things which is why you're here go to pottyats dot com if you donate three pounds or more you'll get a shout out at the beginning and the end of the show you'll join pod squad you'll support the stuff that you enjoy hopefully

and you'll help us out in the process. Mikey, I believe you've got some sort of list of names there. That's what I'm looking at right now. What can loosely be called a list of names in reality. It's just smashing together nouns and adjectives until I giggle a bit. Yes. Love it. We begin this list of random nonsense with Alexa. Is this Cheggs?

Sorry, everyone at home if your machine's now been set off. Strap-on, cap-on, pegs, penguins. Pod, my fluffing squad. Tiny Peter, closet tory. What's that? So, all your pheasant-eating. Oh, Lord Brottovich. Creamy muck-muck.

Oh, no, my Cheggso suit's been hit. Donak, 07. Bean-Stymittis? Bean-Sty mittles? If someone can, if, Beanstimittles. I'm trying to work out if that's, you know... Well, they trick you into saying a bad thing.

A roomed thing. Yeah. Beanstimit... Is it written backwards, maybe? Sit in my schneeb. No, it's not. I want to sit all over your schneeb. Hello, it's editing Mikey here.

We figured this name out at the very end of the show. So stay tuned. Place your guesses now. It's very obvious. How did we not figure it out? Thank you. Bye. We continue with Stephen Scourdes, British PM, fishy poo sack.

How juvenile? I love it. Cowdoy in the Freddie Weber. Very good. And Anonymous, who was very generous, and they say, Longtime listener, first time donate her. I just want to give a huge shout out and congratulations to my friend and fellow listener, Matt, who is just.

just passed his final exam and is now a doctor of biology. Wow. Congratulations, Matt. I always knew you could do it. Congratulations. So if you're a Pollyets listener called Matt, who's just become a doctor of biology and you have a friend called Anonymous,

then that's for you, that message. Anonymous you shouldn't have. Congratulations, Dr. Matt. We've got a doctor who listens to Pottietz now. That's an achievement, yeah. So if you have any medical request, just send them in via Pod Squad and then

when that then gets read out you'll have to wait another two weeks and then perhaps the doctor can write in and give an answer so about a four week turnaround just like the NHS Support striking nurses Yes please do actually help them It's not their fault

We've also got more Pod Squaders We've got Cassidy Delaney Sleeping Pouty The Little Spermaid James and the giant dick Good Dick Dick and Dom in da bumhole yo

Prince Beefcakes Another anonymous generous donation And they say Just four months ago I'd never heard of you guys On a random night in January I clicked on a worst games ever episode The algorithm showed me

Yes, it works Come on And now I've caught up On five years of vidiates slash triple jump content In the space of three months Thanks for defining my year so far, Kis Kis. Wow, thank you, Anonymous.

Incredible, thank you. Amazing. And I just want to take the time to say as well, how heartening that is to hear. Because I think we all go through phases, all three of us, where, you know, we've been doing this thing for a while now. Vidyots was a thing in 2018. And, you know, like, do people still really care? Like, do people still give a shit? And especially you people.

Like, do people who find us? feel too alienated by all the references and the law. Yeah, absolutely. Like, as far as I'm concerned, it's like we've still got that core group of people from 2018 and we're just slowly losing them as they die. Yes. They die off.

And that's like, that's kind of gutting and also is a constant source of like self-doubt. So to hear that kind of stuff, like the algorithm actually works and that new people are coming in and liking it, that's really encouraging. So thank you for donating. and thank you for saying that as well.

Thank you. Very much anonymous. We've also got 80 quidogram cosy lives crisis, Chris Martin's gone farting, itty-bitty Peter committee, visit the vidiates discord, Bill Bookter's life is changing,

scandalf pending, and another anonymous donation. Yes, thank you. Anonymous, very generous today. Thank you. We've also got Vince McMahon's moustache, Dave Bumsoor polyps, chocolate egghead trauma, wicks and Dom in da Bungalow, hugged as a child, top 10 Mikey's toilet stories, the very generous Bartek Kubitsa, no pun, and Bartak said,

dudes, it's my birthday. Happy birthday, Bartak. I want you to know that to me, you are like Dick and Dom is to you. That's lovely, thank you. That's very kind. There are a few letters left. Oh, did you know typing cough into Google Images, you will see a lot of people doing invisible BJ.

Do good deeds with this knowledge. Thank you, Matt Tech. That's great. Good deeds. Thanks. That'll be a never-ending source of joy now. Wow, yeah, you're right. Oh, my God. That's obscene.

That's obscene. We've also got Anonymous again. Thank you, Anonymous. Seymour Butts, Stephen Skodez, Cuntius Maximus, Stalin and the Razanets, Mr Macca, and Finn Tristam. That is your pod squad for this week. Thank you so much, everybody, for being so generous.

Podiotts.com. If you'd like to donate three pounds or more to get a shout out at the beginning and the end of the show, do you guys have a favourite? I liked, oh no, my Chexosot has been hit. British PM Fisci Poussac gets my vote. That's a beautiful wordplay.

I quite liked Chris Martin's gone farting. Okay, yeah. Enjoyed it, and it sounds fun. It's a nice sound. Little Spermaid was low-key, quite clever as well, yeah. Yeah, very good stuff. Well, Michael Johnson, you are questioned boy this week. What have you got?

You're darned tooting. Right, let's start with the hardest hitting question, I think. It's always good to, you know, you want to, you know, establish the podcast. And the first question sets that tone. So we have Andrew Emerson here at Emerson on the jelly. and their question is what is the minimum incentive for each of you individually

to eat two big spoonfuls of dirt oh we should set some ground rules here this wasn't included but I'm going to say I'm going to say this is two spoonfuls of the dirt

that is nearest to you that is not property of a house plant so it's not on a pot has to be out in the open okay well doctor of biology Matt I think would probably advise us that even one spoonful could potentially kill us. Pretty far as.

The parasites and stuff. There was that person who ate a slug, wasn't there? And they died. Yes. So, yeah, try and pick a spoonful without a slug in it, I guess. Or two spoonfuls. You've got to get very lucky twice. Yeah, my answer would either be you could not pay me enough money to risk my life with two

spoonfuls of soil, or it would have to be such a high amount that I could pay for because you might get away with it like if you ate two spoonfuls of dirt you might just get lucky and you would maybe have a bit of a tummy ache and then you'd be fine but to counteract the risk that I might not be fine

it would have to be so much that I could afford the very greatest doctors to make me better so that that's is at your minimum to cover your medical expenses and a little bit of spending money and then the spends yeah

so like a million pounds spending money and then... Jesus. I don't want to eat too. Right, no, picture this. Someone comes to you. Peter, here's £900,000. You're going to go, nope, sorry, mate.

All right, a million pounds spending money is silly. That's too much. But £900,000, I mean, yeah, I can't quantify what the risk is in terms of health and then what the cost might be to get better. because it might just be something that the NHS could deal with unless I obviously die instantly. But if not, if I'm just ill, the NHS might do it for free.

So I don't know, but it would be an awful lot. Yours varies depending on the circumstances post ingestion. Yeah, or because I don't know what the circumstances would be, then I would just have to say you couldn't pay me enough to eat. Good God. Every time one of these questions gets asked in my day-to-day life, I realize how cheap I am because I was honestly going to say

like a fiver. Oh, Michael. It's funny. We're probably talking tablespoons here or serving spoons. All right. A tenor then, geez. Good God.

This man wants to die. I've survived silica gel. I've eaten dirt as a kid. And I mean, look at the man I am now. I like to believe it wouldn't really do any damage. Well, yeah.

Give me a dicky tummy. You've locked in your offer now. You're off the table. I'm going to sweep up this fire. pound. Yeah, good for you, man. It's all yours. I mean, you're right that, you know, kids do end up getting a bit of dirt in their mouths when they're playing, but do they eat two big spoonfuls? I don't know. You're right that if someone came to me and said, like, I'm not going to give you a million pounds. I'll, I'll offer you like 15 grand or so, you know, still like

a really big amount of money. Like, yeah, when you put it like that, I'm tempted, but it's difficult. Yeah. How about you, Ben? Um, I, I would also do it for a high amount of money. However, I think I would call an ambulance in advance. And I would just say, help, this man is eating dirt. Please send someone out here right now. He needs medical attention. He doesn't look well. And then I would, and then I would time my little bib on. I get my, I get my digging spoon out. And I'd have a couple of hearty mouthfuls. Maybe I would pair it with, you know, some sort of delicious beverage to help wash it down. And I would like to think around the time I was done, the ambulance would arrive to immediately pump my stomach. And to save me, I could collect my earnings. Perhaps after I'm checked out of whichever clinic they put me in for my own safety because I've been eating dirt. And they need to sort of do like a psych evaluation.

Well, that's the risk. Yeah, you might get yourself section. if you're not careful. There's a man eating dirt. They're going to want to ask some pretty serious questions. And I don't want them to take my winnings. I just googled, is it safe to eat dirt?

And under the people also ask section, there's a heading titled, Is it okay to eat a little bit of dirt? Just a little as a treat. As a treat, yeah. Mike, you can have a little bit of dirt as a treat. We have dirt at home. We have three salt and pepper grinders in our house.

salt, pepper, and then just a little bit of dirt, you know, the third brown shaker. It's a sprits of dirt, lovely. Cheese, parmesan, dirt, what? Dirt. Anyone? Dess. Any one? Dirt.

Sorry, I've also just found an article. Eating dirt. It might be good for you. I'm just going to read the first line of this. Okay. It melts in your mouth like chocolate, says Ruth Ann. Melks. Describing her favorite treat.

Who said that? um ruth anne t joiner is ruth still alive those articles from uh 2005 so maybe not it melts in your mouth like chocolate says the late ruth and tea joiner this article's unhinged is just her saying like how much she loves it Jesus Christ I hope they cremated her because you know you can't can't put her in the dirt she'll just eat her way out oh dear right well thank you boys um I I should have said something higher than five because I've got a feeling there's going to be a donation

next week of five pound and yeah, I'll have to do it then, won't I? I've entered a legally binding contract. Right. All right. Who would like to do their thing first? I would love to do my thing if that's okay. Please do.

Yes, please. A couple of weeks ago, it finally happened. It's been a bit of a spiritual journey for me recently. First, meeting Dick and Dom and upsetting them in a way that I will never forget. Then seeing the show live, I got to see my good friend Michael Johnson, nearly killed on stage. That was kind of amazing as well. And then I went to Stoke-on-Trent.

You did, yes. You did, yes. Historic town. Historic town on the River Trent. Now, I've written a first-hand account of my time, my short time in Stoke-on-Trent. Sort of like a religious pilgrimage it was for me. And I kind of wanted to share that with you guys and the Podiat's listeners so that they could also go on this journey with us or with me, you know, in the past. But before I get there, just because I am still a little paranoid that maybe people will be listening to this and somehow are not familiar with the Neighbors' Cat's song from Dick and Dominda Bungalow, Michael Johnson, who's editing this episode, would you mind inserting that into proceedings right now?

Putty cat, putty cat. Where have you been? Well, I've been all over this week, but you know, my favourite place I've been to... Stoke on Trent, oh yeah, to Stoke on Trent. Historic town on the River Trent. It's a vibrant mix of the great and the good, like Reginald Spitfire Mitchell and Josiah Wedgwood. Come and lose yourself in the pottery shopping centre. Why not try a snap that you're okay?

It's a culinary adventure. Come to Stoke-on-Trent and see just what is meant. Buy that welcome phrase of a op-no here in Stoke-on-Trent. Oh, isn't it? Isn't it just beautiful? It's wonderful. Did you know that Dave Chapman turned up on the Dick and Dom show on stage, as did the Prysidia and Melvin O'Dome?

Oh, man, what a star-studded lineup. Yeah. Do you know which venue that was? Like the O-2 or something in somewhere, I think like in London. I don't know if it was the O-2. They can't be playing the O-2, surely. That would be amazing. Must be a different O-2.

There's like one in Newcastle, so I don't know. But some, I think it was a London venue. The whole gang got together. Oh, yeah. That would have been the one to see if we'd known. We went to Nottingham. Woo-hoo. We sure did.

Okay. I've got my account here. I'm going to try and calm down. I'm quite excited to share this with you. So I just need to calm my breathing a little bit because I'm scared I'm going to stumble over my words. And I really want to get across quite how incredible this journey was. People who live in Stoke-on-Trent and listen to this podcast, they don't know how good they've got it. Because they're there every day.

And I only got to visit for a little bit. So here's my adventure to Stoke-on-Trent in words. by Ben Potter, aged nearly 31. I began my adventure in the car park of the Clough Street Tesco Extra. Knowing the grand voyage that was laid out before me and barely able to contain my excitement, I entered the gigantic supermarket to do a wee. I didn't want anything slowing me down in this historic town.

Wilkins in hand, I heard really heavy breathing coming from one of the cubicles. Initially troubled at the thought of someone potentially doing a wank or having a cardiac event, I eventually shook it off and chuckled to myself as I could only assume this person was also very excited about being in Stoke-on-Trent. Sorry, you shook it off.

Yeah, I did. I shook it off. I said what I said. Leaving Tesco, I turned right and proceeded along an adjacent wavy footpath. I did think about following the wavy-bricked bit but was worried I'd have too much fun so I elected to walk in a regular straight line instead.

If you have the time, look it up on Google Maps. It's wavy on there too. At the end of the wavy path, I saw my first monument to this great city, a several-foot-long sheet of plastic detailing the historical contributions of Reginald Spitfire Mitchell. It was a bit grubby, and I had to fight every urge to enter the adjoining Mitchell Memorial Youth's Art Center and Spitfire Cafe, but I rationalised that if Reginald-Spitfire Mitchell, the inventor of the airplane, could invent an airplane, I could continue on my adventure without delay. Heading up Piccadilly Street was truly a life-changing experience.

I passed Ainslie Insurance Brokers, Pepe's Fast Food, Salon VIP, I Do Bridal, Nail Bar, Leanne Haycock nail artist, Angel Star Nails, Mr Phones, Piccadilly Mini Market, Piccadilly Shopping Arcade, HSBC, H&T porn brokers, and several other businesses that weren't permanently shuttered. It was really quite overwhelming, to be honest. I was just a small boy in a big city, a big city that ranks 69th in population in the UK. Nice. Nice. I needed to catch my breath. It was all too exciting. Ducking into an alley to gather my thoughts, I took the opportunity to pose next to a bin, emblazoned with the local, or rather Stokel, Council's logo. I couldn't believe my luck. When would I ever get the chance to do such a thing

again, I said aloud to the rat whose dinner I'd disturbed? Right next to the bins was some street art pitching Stoke-on-Trent as the UK City of Culture 2021. I began to dissect my experience of the city thus far and determined how it was possible for Stoke-on-Trent not to be the city of culture in 2021 or indeed any year. I googled it and Coventry one. Oh. Back on the streets, heading north on Town Road, I began to notice a lot of residents in sporting apparel and hooded clothing. I considered stopping one of the Stokels to ask them if this was a Stokel uniform of some kind, but decided against that. It must be that everyone is so relaxed and comfortable in this historic city

that formal wear isn't necessary, I said to myself, classistly. And then, there it was, a bastion of hope, a beacon for the unwashed masses, the true cornerstone of Stoke culture, the pottery's shopping centre. I was beside myself with excitement. This must have been what it felt like for the first archaeologist to uncover an Egyptian tomb

or for people with foot fetishes to be told how high above the ground they're flying. Bundling into the sacred church, Church dedicated to capitalism, I barely knew where to begin. Claire's accessories? Millie's cookies. Perhaps I could get some new shoes at Clarks, a new phone at the three store, or maybe even sign up to a new internet plan in the EE shop.

Hang on. This is so, I can't believe this. This is a disgrace. So it's not just full of pottery shops. Questions at the end? Right. We'll talk about this, I promise. Yeah.

Would Kevin Bacon, voice of the E.E. e-adverts in the UK be there? I pondered. No, I determined. If he's anywhere, he'll be in one of the other 50 shops, seven restaurants and cafes, or the nine-screen cinema all under one roof, your neighbourhood community shopping centre is right on your doorstep. It was so emotionally overwhelmed by the experience, it wasn't until I returned to the car and was on route home that I realised I'd completely forgotten to try a Staffordshire oat cake. Oh, Ben, I muttered to myself in frustration, you are a frightfully forgetful pillook. But then, as if the great city was giving me one last gift, I spotted a sign for the Wedgwood Institute,

which stands on the former site of Stokel Potter, Josiah Wedgwood's Brickhouse Pottery Works. Smiling to myself, and knowing that it was Josiah Wedgwood who cut the first sod for the canal in 1766 and erected his Etruria works that year, the day felt redeemed. I may not have been taken on a culinary adventure, but for me, the great city of Stoke-on-Trent will forever be the historicist town on the River Trent. Wow. Absolutely incredible. Wow.

So that sounds like you had a big day there. You went like right up several streets and indoors, outdoors. You saw all the local high street favorites. Lots of nail shops. Saw nail shops. I saw breaks. Did you go past a vape shop by chance? I did actually.

I should have mentioned that in the stuff. Sorry I didn't mention that. If you two ever get the opportunity, I know it's expensive. And, you know, you don't, they don't let many people in a year. Tickets are quite exclusive. But if either of you get the chance to go to Stoke-on-Trent, I would recommend it. It's a life-changing experience. I mean, I feel like I've lived at vicarity through you, but, you know, you've got to experience it for yourself.

You do. You really do. Now, Peter, I was equally completely bemused when I got to the pottery shopping center, and it turns out that that's a play on obviously. what the locals are called the Stokels, sorry, are called in Stoke-on-Trent which are like, it's potters. The potters. Yeah, exactly.

Because of all the... Because, yeah, the potter you're in pottery industry. Because of all the pottery stuff, yeah. So the photo, because I watched it back earlier, and we all know it very well. The Stoke-on-Trent song, when it shows the pottery's shopping centre, not only does the neighbour's cat sound like, he says, pottery shopping

centre, it shows a photo of a man making pots. Yeah, and shelves and shelves of potter. Yes. That's what I was expecting. We've been living a lie for like nearly five years now. Yeah. Oh my God. I can't believe there's not even just like a single shop that sells potted goods. That's like that's a gold man waiting to happen.

See, there probably is like a covered market that deals exclusively in pottery and things. Yeah. Like once a month or something. That's honestly what I was expecting when I heard of the pottery shopping centre. but no, it's the pottery's shopping centre and it's a shopping centre. I hope I didn't tarnish the experience too much. Absolutely not. It sounds like you still have managed to make the most of it.

Absolutely not. I felt that I was able to go on a fact-finding mission and can now, next time I talk to my good friend Dave Chapman, I can let him know and he will, I'm sure, correct his video and song. Did you happen to go past the sexy emporium that's in Stoke-on-Trent? I can't say that I did Yeah I was following your journey on Google Maps And just next to the pottery shopping centre

There's a place called the sexy Emporium Oh man I don't have to go back Sassy Emporium And I mean from the from the photos it looks Incredibly sexy Oh wow that does look sexy Can we rename it The Polytes presents

The Sexy Emporium Sorry I think I've found out Google Maps. This is the worst. The name of the shop sounds like bum piss for a porn shop. Discretion.

I read it as excretion. Excretion. Discretion. Okay, flights on air Canada. Oh, wow. Mayorka, that's new. Oh, nice.

But Vienna is a classic Mozart, palaces and schnitzel. Now you're cooking. If you're hungry, deli brings the heat. Heat. Cartagena's got sun and the sea to cool off. So does Martinique. And that French cuisine?

Book it. Yes, chef. Wait, what about Lyon? Choose from our world of destinations if you can. Air Canada. Nice travels. Desquitian. Oh, my goodness.

That's a very sexy shop from the shoes and lingerie. Yeah, goodness me. So what's it called sexy Emporium? Apparently on Google Maps Stoke, all right, well we'll change that But that's my thing I went to Stoke on Trent, I did it Well done

Wow, you're the first and only Vidiot to step foot In those hallow grounds, right? Yeah, I think I've been through it on the train But I've not stopped Oh, you should stop, it's well worth it Yeah You can go on my journey

Yeah One day I'll have a big Mikey day and I'll get the megabus up to Stoke-on-Trent and have a big old day. Hell, yeah. Right. Thank you very much. Poddiet's probably.

Oh, it's been a while, hasn't it? Yeah, we haven't done this for a bit. Oh, dear. Okay. I'm going to submit that now. Okay. Thank you for improving Google Maps. You'll get an email when your suggestion is reviewed.

Okay. Thank you, Google. Hopefully by the time this comes out, everyone at home will be able to go look at that and really enjoy it. Yeah. They've got a website. Yeah, I'm scrolling through it now. They've got a wide selection of goods and whatnot.

Brand spanking new lines. Yeah, lots of spanking. That's on sale. This is the second time we've ended up on a sex shop and I've gone straight to the sale section. Jesus, that is. Wow, okay. Wow, that's big.

That's the biggest. Would anybody like a question? Yeah. I'm also on the website. I'm just going to say, send you a photo of something I've found. Ooh, what you got? Here it comes.

Get ready. It's a life life. It's a man in a cage. Oh my Christ. What? That is interesting. When I say cage, I don't mean like that one that people who know sex toys are thinking of. I mean, it's the size of a man.

It's like made out of leather straps and he's just sort of stood in it. It's like a gigantic thing. trap. It's like a sort of weaved thing made out of loads of belts that all cross over each other. And he's, yeah, it's very odd. It's too much for, too much for Twitter, do you think? I mean, there's nothing overly explicit about it. But yeah, definitely it's, it's interesting to say at least. Maybe we'll not put that on Twitter. But you two can head to the sexy emporium and witness this lovely display for yourself. Yes, absolutely. Okay, sorry, move on to a question. Let's get out of here.

God. Had enough of stunk. Too much excitement for one day. There's a question I need to ask before I ask this question. Who are your childhood heroes? If you had to pick one, who would you say it was your boy or girl? I mean, Dick and Dom were up there, but probably that's only kind of since idiots that they would be the answer I would give.

I think as a child, I had a very boring hero. and my hero was Nick Park, famous for creating Wallace and Grommet and adding Ardman Studios. Did you know who he was as a child? Oh, yeah, I wrote an essay about him in school about how much I looked up to him and how I wanted to work with him.

So that's my answer to the question. You've always got any ideas. Childed heroes. I realize that's a big question to spring on you, actually given you pre-reading. Yeah, I mean, I've got the fallback of Dick and Dom if I have to say that, but I'm sure I must have a better answer.

Sorry, did you say childhood heroes or just heroes generally? Childhood hero. Childhood, okay. Well, that might be a bit easier if I can think. Maybe more sort of lean more towards Neil Buchanan, actually, than Dick and Dom. I think as a child, I really liked the idea of just sort of that being some kind of job that I could do when I grow up, just being an artist, but not in the sense that not like a professional artist, just. standing in a room with giant crayons and you know standing on his set and one day you hope to own as much salt as Neil Buchanan yeah yeah man had an endless supply I wanted to just be

Neil Buchanan not not an actual professional artist but a TV artist who lives in a big pencil case I respect it respect it hmm um I mean if it's not cheating it might have been Spider-Man okay good answer yeah no that's a totally valid answer yeah i just thought of a better one mine would probably be obi one canobi i think he really was my hero are you gonna are you gonna lock in that answer yeah if i'm allowed fictional characters i'll say obi won't canoby sure right now we get on to the actual question oh boy you've picked some winners here hady mnore at haddy mnore on twitter asks you enter an underground bare-knuckle boxing fight brackets match competition i don't no boxing. The winner gets a thousand pound. Your opponent, your childhood hero.

Oh, fuck. No. Would you concede or proceed to fuck them up? Well, I wouldn't win for a start, but if the question is morally, would I feel okay about punching my hero? I think I probably would if it was in an underground fighting ring, because, you know, they've consented to do it too. Yeah. I definitely should have picked Neil Buchanan though that would have been an easier I should have picked the head that would have been

ideal it would oh man Spider-Man's gonna mess you up Ben I've seen I've seen we've all seen Spider-Man

fight match a man Randy Savage in in an underground wrestling fight in the 2001 documentary Spider-Man yeah three minutes I've got you for three minutes I'm not even I'm not even close to

the size of bone sore bone saw was a lot bigger than me and he didn't fare very well I don't think if I've regardless of whether or not I fight him according to past events

his uncle Ben will die that day and I don't necessarily want to do that to him you know so maybe I'll concede on those grounds I mean I'm looking at Nick Park he's an old oldish man it feels like it's like punching David at

even if it's in a pre-organized fight with two consenting parties I feel that's going to go down the newspapers for history, the inventor of Wallace and Grommett and Chicken Run, mowed down by angry British man who did it all for a thousand pound.

Yeah. I don't think I could do it for a grand. It'd have to be much, much higher, so I could split the money with him. I mean, not that he really needs the money, but it made me feel better about the whole thing. So, yeah, is that three for three? We're all declining the chance to punch Spider-Man, Obi-Wan Kenobi and Nick Park.

Yeah, I think so. Okay, good. I think that's the respectable answer. I'm proud of us. We've really turned a corner from the earlier discussion of eating dirt. I was going to say, bring out the dirt, though. Yeah. For a grand, yeah, let's go.

Get an audience together. I'll go ham on that. Fantastic. Thank you very much, boys. Peter, could you indulge us in your thingling? I'd love to. I've got a weird capitia here. Well, it's, yeah, I suppose it is weird.

It's a bit of a mystery. There's a seemingly obvious solution to it, but no one quite knows. So this is the story of Alfred Lowenstein or Lowenstein. I'm not sure. I'm going to settle on Lowenstein for the remainder of this thing. Alfred Leonard Lowenstein was a Belgian financier. At his peak in the 1920s, Lowenstein was worth around 12 million pounds in the currency of the time, which is equivalent to 769, 0.2 million pounds in 2021,

which made him the third richest person in the world at the time. His wealth came from investments in electric power and artificial silk businesses when both of those industries were in their infancy. Lowenstein is remembered today for his mysterious disappearance and death in 1928. I'm going to tell you all about his mysterious disappearance. On the evening of the 4th of July, 1928, Lowenstein left from Croydon Airport to fly to Brussels on his private aircraft a Fokker F7A-3M Trimotor, G-E-B-Y-I,

whenever that is. I know it well. You know it well, we've all been on one. Along with six other people. While the aircraft was crossing the English Channel at an altitude of 4,000 feet, Lowenstein went to the rear of the aircraft to use the lavatory. In Lowenstein's aircraft, a door at the rear of the main passenger cabin opened onto a short passage with two more doors. The one on the right led to the lavatory, while the one on the left

was the aircraft's entrance door. When Lowenstein had not reappeared after some time, his secretary went in search of him and discovered the lavatory was empty while the aircraft's entrance door was open and flapping in the slipstream. Oh my God. Yeah, I know. The employee, along with the others in the aircraft, asserted his belief that Lowenstein had fallen through the aircraft's rear door and plunged several thousand feet to his death in the English Channel. Jesus. Which is horrific, isn't it?

Nobody hear the... Yeah, I know. The aircraft landed first on the beach before transferring to the airfield at San Ingle there in France. And then we have the next section says news and investigation. So news of Lowenstein's demise caused panic selling in his corporation's publicly traded shares, which immediately plummeted in value by more than 50%. On the 12th of July 1928, it was reported that tests had been conducted by the accident's branch of the

British Air Ministry using Lowenstein's aircraft. It was stated that at an altitude of 1,000 feet, one of the ministrymen had thrown himself against the aircraft's entry door, which had opened about six inches, that's 150 millimetres, but he was immediately thrown back into the aircraft, when the slipstream violently slammed the door shut. It was concluded it would have been impossible for someone to accidentally open the door and fall out. Lowenstein's body was discovered near Boulogne on the 19th of July 1928

and was taken by fishing boats to Calais where his identity was confirmed by means of his wristwatch. An autopsy was performed at the request of his family and his brother-in-law stated they did not suspect anyone of foul play, but they didn't want anyone to later suggest after the burial that Lowenstein might have been poisoned or died in the aircraft

and had then been thrown out. So they were just trying to rule out foul play so that people wouldn't want to have to like exhum his body or whatever. Right. The autopsy revealed a partial fracture of Lowenstein's skull and several broken bones.

It was concluded he'd been alive when he struck the water. Lowenstein's body was buried in a cemetery outside Evere in a tomb belonging to his wife's family, the Missons, However, his name was never carved on the slab covering his casket, so he was, in effect, buried in an unmarked grave. And we now have the theories as to what happened.

Many theories have been put forward as to exactly what happened to Lowenstein in the back of his aircraft. Some suspected a criminal conspiracy in which his employees murdered him. The New York Times hypothesized a growing absent-mindedness, noted by many of Lowenstein's acquaintances, may have caused him to walk out of the wrong door of the aircraft. Even though the air ministry did say that throwing yourself against the door at only 1,000 feet wouldn't, you know, was not enough to open it. Did you just think that the toilet had great views or something? How could you get the wrong door?

I don't know. It's baffling. Because he'd left behind a tangled web of business ventures, many of which were highly leveraged, others theorised that his business empire may have been on the verge of collapse. Some even asserted that corrupt business practices were about to be exposed, and Lowenstein therefore committed suicide. But none of these theories were ever proven. In 1987, William Norris wrote Lowenstein's story in a book titled, The Man Who Fell from the Sky.

Norris presents evidence in support of his case that if Lowenstein's death was not a conspiracy by business rivals and associates, a certain opportunism existed. regarding the death of the tycoon and his insurance. He also shows that later events are frequently ignored, such as the fact that Lowenstein's son Robert shot one of the family's servants under murky circumstances within a decade or so after the tragedy.

The son was himself killed in an aviation accident in 1941 while serving with the air transport auxiliary. Norris concluded that Lowenstein had been thrown from the aircraft by the pilot Donald Drew at the behest of Madeleine Lowenstein, the motive being to gain control of his fortune. He suggested the aircraft's rear door was completely removed while in the air

and the replacement was later fitted on the ground at St. Paul when they landed. Huh. That's believable, yes. Yeah, especially given that apparently the story is that the member of staff who found that he was missing said the door was flapping in the wind when they went into the corridor. But anyway, that was his conclusion.

Crime writers Robert and Carol Bridgestock have speculated Lowenstein faked his own death and disappearance because of the financial irregularities in his businesses. This theory is supported by the facts that the body was buried in an unmarked grave and that his wife did not attend the funeral. Oh, now that is very strange. That is a bit odd, isn't it? And that's where it ends in terms of that story and the mystery around it. So there's no answer. And some really conflicting info there. Apparently the door was flapping open, but someone reckons the door was removed.

But also someone else says it was impossible to open the door. How did he, whether he was pushed or jumped, like, how did he even get out there if you couldn't open the door at? I know exactly how this happened. I've got a theory. I think that's very strong. So he went to the bathroom to do a plop. Yeah. He stood up.

He sought himself out. and he opened the door and he remembered oh I've got to flush the toilet and he pressed the button and we're all aware of how forceful toilets flushes are

in airplanes they're really powerful I think back then even more powerful and I reckon he pressed a flusher and the pressure built in the room

and started pulling him towards the ball and so in a panic he grabbed onto the doorframe as really pulling pulling himself trying to save his own life And as the toilet stopped flushing, all of this strength that you had kind of catapulted him towards the door, bang, hit the door, flies out.

And that's how it happened. And worst of all, he then had to go into free fall with his own shit for the last minute of his life. Which would win? Well, apparently weight has no bearing on how fast you fall. So they would have fallen at exactly the same rate, I think. But would, as he has a larger surface area, would he not have fallen slower? It depends if he sort of dived, put his hands together and his tucked his head in. With his dying, his dying breaths, he thought, I am beating this turd to the ground.

I'm going to die a winner, damn it. I don't know if the turd was ever found. Perhaps it was buried in an unmarked grave. That's where his wife was. She was busy at the other funeral. Yes, the pooh-n-r-r-r-l, yeah. The poo-n-n-rall, breaking poos. So, answer on the postcard, everyone,

what do you think happened to Mr. Lowenstein? Are you asking me now, or are you asking the listeners? No, I'm asking the audience. Okay, good, because I don't have a theory. I like Michael's. Yeah, me too. That's the most believable to me, at least. That sounds right.

Where were you, Michael, in the late 1980s? I was vacationing in Vienna. It's lovely, absolutely lovely. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's photos and everything, I promise. Sounds nice. Moving on, would you like a question, boys? Yes, please.

This one comes from Adi at 2 Adi underscore P on Twitter. They ask, A podcast I like announced it shutting down by a host saying, quote, you may be sad, but fuck you. Everything dies. Everything and everyone will die. And this is going to happen to you again and again, end quote.

Do you think Vidyits is changing would have gone down better if you did this instead? Well, I mean, we sort of did, but after the fact when people sort of started acting like it was inconvenience, inconveniencing them that we were losing our jobs. And we did say, we did tell people to fuck off, I think. Yeah, I think we're all a bit fragile and we're just like, oh, God, please stop. You can be sad, but sorry that this is so annoying for you. yeah it's only us that can't peer rent anymore oh boy oh boy yeah it may have um it may have i don't know it may have gone down better or worse but i think we certainly would have

um hemorrhaged more viewers and and subscribers and listeners at the time i think we wouldn't have held on to as many people if we'd said fuck you everything dies yeah i mean he's not wrong but it demonstrates a complete lack of tact and four four plans I think there is a, there is a, not necessarily a correct way to break that news, but there is certainly a more delicate, sensible way to break the news that doesn't necessarily burn bridges. Yeah, I mean, imagine getting a call one day out of nowhere. Sorry to let you know, but your grandmother's dead, but fuck you.

Fuck you, everything dies. This is going to happen again and again, get used to it. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if it wouldn't have been in video style to go out in a blaze of glory like that we're too polite for that so yeah that wouldn't that wouldn't have gone down too well

maybe you could have just yeated Billy into the stratosphere as a final goodbye but he's such a delicate little boy what bless you don't know if there's it do you think there's any other ways we would have done it I mean the video's changing thing is like it's become a joke now but genuinely that was the best

way we could think to spin it rather than just say, yeah, it's done, we're done, it's over. We thought changing is the right way to, was sort of, it just felt like the right thing to do because. Yeah, saying it's not going away completely. It's not done. It's not done. It's not going to try and do some things and potty. It's still going to continue, we'll stream from time to time.

But yeah, it's definitely changing. I mean, I think a very unintentional. But a good meme came out of that, and I'm glad we had changing. I think there was a wonderful bit of word choice. So, yeah, good job us. Yeah, we do an annual video to celebrate it on triple jump. Yeah, to celebrate the non-changing of triple-dump. Yeah, we do.

Yeah. That fucking thumbnail. Oh, man. Yeah, that thumbnail has given people a lot of, a lot of scares. He's like, oh, what's this, what's this announcement? Triple jump in? Oh, sorry, videos is changing. Oh, no.

Oh, no. What's this mean? Oh, what are the funny boys up? two now. Uh-oh. Oh, no. Oh, boy. Oh, dear.

All right. Thank you very much, boys. Would you like to hear my thing? Yes. I come to you with a little bit of monkey news this week. Oh. Oh. It's headline reads,

Gary, the gorilla statue, stolen from Carluk Garden Center. This is a tragic tale. I like monkey stories, but it seems that all of my monkey stories. monkey stories end up with the monkey disappearing, like Uncle Fatty. I'm not sure I can handle losing another monkey, but I digress. Let's find out about poor, poor Gary. Thieves have stolen an eight-foot gorilla ornament from a Lanarkshire Garden Center. I mean, the highest of the century, my God, there's so much stuff they could have stolen. Tills registers, no, I want the big eight-foot gorilla. The fiberglass structure

named Gary the Gorilla has become popular with customers at Raynard Nursery in Carl Luke over the last 10 years. Owner, Andrew Scott, has posted a tongue-in-cheek video online pleading for Gary's safe return, but insists it is a serious situation. This video is quite spectacular. He's got like a little badge with SaveGarine Gary the Guerrilla on it.

He's holding a bit of paper, and he's surrounded by three baby gorilla statues. Oh, no. And he's holding one in his arms like a baby. He's poor things. It's quite a heartbreaking scene, really. The crime occurred between half ten on Sunday and midnight on Monday. Mr. Scott said he was bemused as to why someone would steal the ornament.

He told BBC Scotland, I'm really annoyed about it. I understand the funny side of it, but I'm taking this very seriously. He's worth a fair bit of money. It wasn't her young farmer's prank. This was planned. Oh, no. Oh, dear. Mr. Scott said CCTV showed a car arriving at the nursery around half 10,

with the occupants getting out and unbolting the ornament. A van returned nearly two hours later and removed Gary from the premises. Wow, that's a long process of their plan. Yeah, it's not to spur the moment drunken, oh, let's steal the bloody gorilla. like, no, they've calculated this and they've really done it right. The van was seen leaving the garden centre

and heading in the general Glasgow direction. This is quite a heartbreaking quote. We saw him disappear into the darkness on that wet night and we haven't seen him since. Oh, no, Gary. Gary, no. It seemed to be fairly well planned

from the footage we have, but unfortunately we can't see who actually took him. The gorilla figure is used as a signpost to the garden centre by careers and customers. Owners dress up Gary for occasions like Christmas, and he was even sporting a face mask during the pandemic. Oh.

Oh. And now he's dead. Oh, no. Even at some point they decided to give him chicken pox and put a lot of red circles on him for some reason. Why? Oh, okay. To try and keep people away from him. But this is not where the tale of his heist ends.

on Thursday this has happened a couple of weeks ago now owner Andrew Scott was sent photos of a gorilla matching Gary's description tied to the trailer of a vehicle on the M25 and on the M40 near Warwick

See this is why I said oh yeah this is the only part of the story I know is a headline that said a photo of gorilla on motorway is not missing Gary Yeah yeah So yeah it was sadly it was

later concluded that this was in fact just Gary's brother. Oh, Barry. Barry and Gary, Baz and Gaz and Gaz, the boys. So yes, the headline reads, Giant guerrilla statue sightings were, quote, not Gary. The manufacturer of the figure has made several versions of the statue, and it is believed the sightings were of one of them. Police were able to track the guerrillas movements using the vehicle's registration plate.

Once the police mapped out the, movements of the guerrilla spotted on motorways around England, it was determined that the ornament was not Gary. This is, I think this is the most in-depth police work I've heard in quite some time. I'm glad police resources are going towards a bloody statue of a gorilla. Anyway, the latest headlines from Scotland. Oh, wait, nope, that's just a random bit of text I copied from the article. I didn't say that.

Mr. Scott said it moved from London to Whitehaven in Cumbria. and unfortunately it's not Gary it's one of Gary's brothers so we're a bit disappointed because we were really hoping it was him Gary comes from a fairly extended family we've yet to decipher how many brothers he has

but we are looking into that just so we know oh dear I mean if he can go on his family tree website and track all the Gary's he continues I'm pretty convinced we'll get him back it'll take some time but we've not stopped the response from the public was huge so the minute gary makes an appearance anywhere i'm sure the

public will help us find him and get him back to where he belongs and sadly that is currently where the story ends it's been about a month now um i've got no idea what these people are planning to do with an eight-foot gorilla but you definitely can't put that in your front guarding because that's a bit too conspicuous yeah well this this has happened before um i can't remember if if I've ever brought this along to Podiat's because I should have done if I haven't. And it's just reminded me this story exists. I think I may well have done that in the early days. But there were some students in the 1950s who stole a taxidomized gorilla from Bristol City Museum.

And he was missing for like some weeks. And then he was like found outside like a police station or something or like the fire. the fire station they dropped him off but they're a basket was backed up in a blanket yeah pretty much

like they eventually so it was part of rag week as they used to call it in the day which is like just students playing pranks and they just took him

and had some photos taken with him here are the photos it's a good looking gorilla it is I mean it's a real one it's that is not taxidomied

it is it is badly done literally a man in a gorilla costume Well, it might be Coco, I guess. And then apparently, so they posed for some photos with him. That's one of those.

And then they also tried a series of hats on him. And this is one of the photos of the hats. He looks a bit like my uncle. But they did hand him in eventually. So that could happen again in this case. God, I hope so. Yeah, they're just going to take him on a bit of a road trip for a bit and return him. Yeah, let me add those to the thread.

I'm going to share a quick. I had looked through Gary the Gorilla's Facebook page, and I found a banger of a photo. Oh, yeah. For those at home, this is a picture of Gary's backside. Oh, my God. It's like that Donkey Kong picture. You know the one with his ass?

Gary be thick, so you could spot him coming from a mile away. But I like the little interaction in the comments, which is a random punter left a comment saying, Wish my bum was as firm as yours, Gary. And Gary replied, it takes a lot of bananas and peeping to get this firm. Bananas and what? Peeping. So apparently he's a, he's a, he's, his favorite thing is to peep at people and I guess just look at people because he's got quite dead eyes. Right. And as the photo that was put on the thread,

I'll put it in here for reference. But it's just got white eyes. There's peepers. Oh yeah, look at those. It's a bit scary looking, isn't he? That is kind of creepy. Should I add the, the ass picture to the thread as well? I think it belongs on there. And also, I've got one more. image um which is quite a heartbreaking one um this is an image of one of the baby gorillas um being eating a banana to to try and cover its sadness oh that's very sad oh no that's really sad oh poor little thing your dad'll be back soon i'm sure he's just gone out for some cigarettes so many bananas to eat as well oh with gary not here they've got a surplus

yeah oh dear so yeah that that's my little tale of gary i'm going to keep an eye on things i'm going to i'm going to follow the facebook page and if gary returns you'll be the first ones to know. Good, good. Thank you, Michael. Yeah. Maybe he's in the same place that Gizmo is, because he's still not turned up. Rest him. Rest in peace. Yeah. Oh, God. Goodness me. Well, thank you so much, guys, for your things. And thank you everyone listening for your questions, what was submitted. I believe Michael Johnson, there's some kind of shop. You're gosh darn right. If you head to vidiots official.com. And if you click on the lovely little shopbutting, isn't it exciting?

If you click on that, you'll be greeted with an array, a myriad, if you will, of wonderful goods ranging from T-shirts, stickers, mug, hat, and hoodie. What a bounty. Go have a look at it. Wow. Buy something. Oh, we do have a new thing coming soon. Hopefully over the next coming weeks, I feel like we've been saying that for a while,

but it's going to happen. So buckle up because it's going to change your life. But in the meantime, if you're just dying to buy something with a little smiling sausage face on it, you can go to vidyatsofficial.com and head to the shop. Thank you. Yes. YouTube, Twitter, Facebook, all.com forward slash vidyat's official. If you want to go to the Discord, it's Vidyat's Official.com forward slash discord. Big thank you to Tommy and Fleckers for modding us over there.

Go and say hello to fellow Poddietz listeners and Vidyat's viewers. Twitch.tv.4.5. We stream there from time to time. Podiotz.com. If you want to go there, donate three pounds or more, get a shout out at the beginning and the end of the show. You'll support us and you'll join Pod Squad. Here is this week's pod squad once again. Alexa. Is this Cheggs? Strap on cap on pegs penguins. Pod my fluffin squad. Tiny Peter, closet tory. Lord Brotovich, creamy muck, oh no, my Cheggso suit's been hit. Donak 07. Beanstai Mittles. Stephen Scourdes. British PM, fishy pussack. Cowdoy in the Freddie Webber and Anony Mouse

Also, sorry, I was just doing some mental, not mental maths there But I'm convinced that Beanstein Mittles is something And I was just desperately trying to work out what it was I don't know We've also got Cassidy Delaney, sleeping pooty, The Little Spermaid, James and the Giant Dick, Dick and Dom in Da bumhole, yo, Prince Beefcakes, the very generous Anonymous,

80 quidder gram, cosy lives crisis, Chris Martin's gone fartin, itty-bitty Peter committee, visit to the Vidyat's Discord, Bill Booketer's life is changing, scandalf pending, and anonymous. So I got to interject, I've just got it. Yeah?

I've just got it. Bean's time, it is. Oh my God. Yes, you're right. That is so esoteric. Oh, because it's a capital. little eye. It's, oh my God. Yeah, okay. Beans stymittes. Fuck's sake. Oh my God. Bince thy mittes. I hope they stuck around to the end. Yeah.

If you hear this, we got it. We got there. Beans tie mitt is. We've also got Vince McMahon's moustache, Dave Bumsoor polyps, chocolate egghead trauma, wicks and dom in de bungalow, hugged as a child, top 10 Mikey's toilet stories, Bartek Kubitsa, no pun who's very generous, thank you, Bartek, happy birthday again. Anonymous, Seymour Butts, Stephen Skodes,

Cuntyus, Maximus, Stalin and the Razanets, Mr. Macker, and Finn, Tristam. Thank you again to the pod squad this week. Poddiots.com, three pounds or more, three pounds or more to get a shout out at the beginning

and the end of next show. Thank you so much, Peter. Yeah. Do you know what was out on Vidyats this week five years ago? I do. We had Lumo Dil Milano, the man from Milan, part two, redemption. Crash Team Racing Spinning Challenge, piece of cake.

That's where we spun you around on a chair, Ben. I remember that. Felt very sick. Prove it, The Sims 3, live action challenge part two, featuring hat films. Skyrim Zoo, Chapter 7, Road Trip, the man from Milan part three, revenge. In the spotlight, Milanoir. Memory cards, April 16th, which was Game Boy, Justice and Persona 3, Fez.

Fez. Fes. Fez. Pollyette's episode four, Wix. Worst Games Ever, game selection for the 19th of April. Post some tat number nine, we have a theme tune. Worst Games ever, Sabrina the Teenage Witch, a Twitch in Time. That's a good one. Skyroom Zoo, Chapter 8, Furious George.

Sunday, Fun Day and Justice 2 legendary edition. Memory cards for the 23rd of April, which was GT4, Don't Starve and Majora's Mask. Post some tap number 10. We've been Legoed in the Spotlight God of War. Spiro Blindfold Challenge, piece of cake. Five best-selling video games of the pre-industrial era. Skyrim Zoo Chapter 9, Cockadoodle Zoo.

Sunday, Fun Day, Incredible Crisis. There's flipping loads, guys. Memory cards for the April 30th, it was Mega Man Zero, 2, Far Cry 3, Blood Dragon, and Castlevania, Aria of Sorrow. We had probably it's episode 5. R-I-S-T-O-L Now this is

Pod Racing, Star Wars Episode 1 Racer, the good old games re-release and one more, post some tat number 11, the Walrus of Love. That's me. So much to go at. Yeah. So many different shows.

Well, lovely. Mikey, whereabouts are you on the internet? At Parrot Boy on Twitter is the best place to keep up to date with all of my comings and doings. Excellent. That's it. That's it.

Good. I was waiting for more. All right, that's good stuff. And Peter, where are we on the internet? The best place for our comings and doings is to follow us individually at That Peter Austin and at Confused underscore Dude on Twitter or together at Team Triple Jump on, yes, Twitter and Facebook, but also, more importantly, YouTube and Twitch, where we do videos and live streams and play games, worst games ever and do bad cooking and things. Yes, absolutely. why not leave us a five-star review slash rating on your platform of choice it helps something to do with Al Gore's rhythms it really help us out it's free it only takes a moment please do it thank you so much tell a friend as well tell your friends do we have a final question before we bug it off do you have Gary please do you have Gary hand yourself in please stop this torment for the family think of the children excellent thank you slow slow much I'm going to go all right cheers bye Bye.