Podiots - Podiots: Episode 43 - Boy Farts

Episode Date: January 14, 2020

Ben's had to go to burger king, Mikey's legitimising waifu's and Peter has done a long poo. Donate to get a shoutout and join the Pod Squad! - https://streamlabs.com/vidiotsofficial New merch: http://smarturl.it/Podiots Twitch: Twitch.tv/vidiotsofficial YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/vidiotsofficial Twitter: https://twitter.com/VidiotsOfficial Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/vidiotsofficial Discord:  http://bit.ly/VidiotsDiscord Ben and Peter's channel 'TripleJump': https://www.youtube.com/teamtriplejump Follow the gang on Twitter: Ben: @Confused_Dude Peter: @ThatPeterAustin Michael: @ParrotBoy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Pickax. Okay, flights on air Canada. Oh, wow. Majorca, that's new. Oh, nice. But Vienna is a classic Mozart, palaces and schnitzel. Mm-mm, now you're cooking. If you're hungry, deli brings the heat.

Heat. Cartagena's got sun and the sea to cool off. So does Martinique. Mmm, and that French cuisine? Book it. Yes, chef. Wait, what about Lyon? Choose from our world of destinations, if you can.

Air Canada. Nice travels. During the Volvo Fall Experience event, discover exceptional offers and thoughtful design that leaves plenty of room for autumn adventures. And see for yourself how Volvo's legendary safety brings peace of mind to every crisp morning commute. This September,

leased a 2026 X-E-90 plug-in hybrid from $599 bi-weekly at 3.99% during the Volvo Fall Experience event. Condition supply, visit your local Volvo retailer or go to explorevolvo.com. Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful, that was really wonderful. Wonderful, wasn't it, nice? God, that started wonderful, and it turned into...

It was sort of like the happy, happy magical land of, like, gingerbread houses, and then at the end it was Vinnie Jones or something. Did you not like it? Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful, wonderful, wonderful, wonderful, wasn't it nice? Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. Wix. Just immediately clipped my

microphone there a little bit. Maybe it's a metaphor for how 2020 is going to go. Well, maybe not because 2020 started

not great, so it's not quite gingerbread houses and lovely. So God knows what the Tom Jones end,

and Vinny Jones, sorry. Well, maybe it'll have a Tom Jones ending in December. That would be nice.

Oh, hopefully. That would be nice. Yeah. It's not unusual to be drafted into World War III.

But da, but da, but da, but da. Ha. Hey. Good. Good.

Should we roll the intro then or what? Where's Kevin? What do you want to do? I don't know, just someone play some music or something. All right, let me just get my type recorder out. Okay. Oh, fuck. That was stupid.

Where was it? Hang on, stop. Stop the podcast. Michael, where was the metaphorical tape player in your head? So I just reached... It was wallet. I just reached out and grab, like, a little pouch that contains all my spare change, and I flinged it up and smashed it on my table.

And so all my coins fell out, and I'm picking them up. Don't keep your tape recorder in your coin pouch. I'm sorry. It's just the most convenient place. Because I've got to put the coins in to operate it. It's like pay by the hour. Oh, okay. That makes sense.

Have you got your good coins? Actually, there is one good one in there. Let's do Mikey's tour. Yeah, come on. Let's do this. This is your thing. Yeah. So I brought along a random assessment.

assortment of coins. I've got a one Singapore dollar coin. I've got a headphone jack adapter. It's not a coin. Anything's a coin. You can use anything as currency, Peter. Peter, it came out the coin purse. True. Like the tape recorder. That's a coin. Yeah. And in front of me, I'm currently looking at two-pence coin from the year 2012. Isn't that special? That was a pretty good year. The year that where the world didn't end. So, yeah. It's got to be a good year if it didn't end.

We did Olympic. Oh, yeah. Do you remember Olympic? I do remember the Olympic that we did. One of the big headlines out of that was the landmark McDonald's that was built. Simpler times. Is that on the coin? Yeah, it goes into deep detail about the McDonald's and, you know, they saved 100,000 burgers a day at the height.

And it's really, really amazing. Wow. Have you got, um, have you found the tape recorder? Is it in there? Oh yeah, sorry, yeah, sorry. We've got many more coins to get you just slowly picking up coins. Okay, are you ready? Yeah.

Yeah. Oh! Hello, everybody, and welcome to Pottie. It's the official. Boom. Vidiots. Happy. Podcast.

New year. Ooh. With those fireworks. Yes. Hot, pot. It's a conversational podcast where we take some questions from you at home and obey the law of the three us, where everybody brings a thing. Along to talk about.

I'm Ben. I'm Peter. And I'm Michael. We're getting better at that. I feel like this is the year where it all goes right. I mean, judging by how these first four minutes are gone, it couldn't get any better, could it? Attention, everyone. On, Vidiotes is changing again.

We're increasing speed. We're now a coin purse channel. One penny. It's also, this episode's a pretty viral one. I don't know if you guys knew this, because not only is Peter suffering with an illness. I'm nearly done. I think I'll be done tomorrow morning.

But Mikey's ferrets have gone to space. It's amazing, isn't it? Our ugliest boy who's now mildly Twitter famous. Really? I've not seen this. The other night I put up, like, this is a video I recorded in like mid-December. Oh, the sleepy one? Yeah, the sleepy one.

Has that gone viral? Well, it's currently sitting at 600 retreats and 5,000 likes on Twitter. Oh, wow. I've got some serious clout now, so I guess... Big numbers. Yeah, boy. And I'm getting lots of, well, if you concerned DM, like, well, not DMs there, replies from people like, is he actually dead, or like, you shouldn't be doing this?

Don't worry. Stop shaking him around. He just does that by himself. There's no muscle there. He's just flopping. He's just flopping. Can I still hear fucking coins? I've done a like and a retweet, which apparently I'd not already done.

I knew I hadn't retweeted, but I thought I'd liked it already. Everyone at home, go to App Pariboy and fuel my ego, please. Do it. Do it. Do it. Guys, before I tell you a very exciting story about a Hoover, I want to give a shout out to the Pod Squad. Do you guys know what Pod Squad is?

Yeah, I do. Go on, Ed. No, I won't. You can't make me, but I do know. Okay. You go on. Well, I will. Yeah.

I just wanted to say if you knew you first. I do. I don't want to tell you there, because what if you don't know? What if I don't know and I'm pretending? Michael, do you know? It's like the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. It is actually. And gentlewomen.

Gentlewomen. The gentlest women, some say. Too gentle for their own good. No, what it be is people who done give us a little bit of that money from Michael's purse. What, phone, floor? Thanks for replenishing my stock, everybody. Streamlabs.com forward slash vidiots official. Any amount donated is very, very much appreciated and helps us do the show for you. Take recorders.

fortnight by the tape recorders and so on and so forth. These fine people have donated since the last episode. If you donate, not only are you a member of Pod Squad forever, but you get a shout out at the beginning and the end of the next podcast after you donate. Yeah. You know, time permitting, because we record it before the date it goes out, obviously. I don't need to, every episode, I feel like I need to explain how time works. I don't need to do this.

You mean the podcast isn't presented live? It's not. What about me, the protagonist of reality? It's not how it works. Okay, I've got them here. Are you ready? Ready. It's Big Titty Jesus 42.

Lord Bratovich. Stedman 6413. I'm going to get it correct this time because they've put notes in here. Ami Dosange. Ami Dosange. Sorry for calling you Amy in the past. Oh. My bad.

Crispy Heisen owl. Very good. So close as well to the actual. Wrong, but not twice. You know. Captain Lugie, Nan Master Gash, Keelow Clouds, Stephen Scodes, Crucifan fiction, carry the worst,

Boppis Raybopris, Triple Jump and Cultaholic FC, Lord Brotovic, Tommy the Wank Engine, who does actually have a note that I will read because I think, by the way, if you put a note in there, we're not always, you know, we're not going to read it out, but we do read them. But this one, I feel like you guys need to know.

Oh, no. I know this isn't enough money to just, this getting said on the podcast, but I need you all to know that I was watching a naughty adult video the other day, and the piece of cake intro music was being played. And it felt different and wrong. It's royalty-free music. A piece of cake is the... Yeah. Oh, God, it is, isn't it? That doesn't belong in naughty adult videos. Maybe it was a circus themed. Yeah. Can you link it, please? Can you donate one pence and just send the link to it, please? Yeah, tell me the way you can do it. Send it to it to it.

if there was a man in that video that he reached climax right at the end when they all go Porn, what is it? I too hope that. Xavier Ramirez, sorry, Chav Chavramarrez. Shav Chavrami. Ode Olly, Benface,

Bon, Bono Bonas and Emily Lemons. Thank you very much. That's Pod Squad for this week. We'll give you a shout at the end of the show. Michael Johnson, you are Question Boy once again. just just take it away oh i i practice this person's name beforehand now it's it slipped from my mind so

everyone gets to witness me struggle through this okay mele mele mele squealy let's go mele squealy that's good hopefully time zones haven't fucked me again but what are your hopes for the year both personal and video wise happy new year boys so it's just you know it's starting new year it's customary to you know look ahead and think What do you want to accomplish? What do you want to do? What are your personal goals? Has anyone, anyone been thinking about that?

It was funny, video-wise, Ben and I, well, Ben had an idea and I had an idea that Ben also then had the same idea at the same time today of a video. Do we all follow so far? Yeah, two videos, respectively, that we could do next time Mikey is here or we're down there or whatever, like some actual video it's content because it's a fun thing. but it's not really video, it's not a tall video game related, therefore we can't do it on a triple channel.

Yeah, it goes on the shippost channel. Yeah. Oh, I'm excited. It's the first time hearing of it, so I'm very interested. I mean, equally, I'm going to have to be a bit of a cock tease and just not,

I guess we shouldn't really say what it is, should we, Ben? Or should we? I don't know. Let's not promise anything. No, let's not commit to it. It's fun. You'll know it when you see it if we do it.

Peter gets hit by a tank. Oh, yes. So there are videos that may happen this year. Or may not. So don't get too excited. But as for personally, what we hope to accomplish this year, I don't know. What do you think, guys? I want to get faster.

Yeah? Just like, just so fucking quick. Real fast. How are you going to achieve that? Any plans are just going to let the fastness come to you? I think, um, I hear it's tied pretty closely to not eating for long periods of time. That's what that is, right?

Oh, that's right, yeah, yeah. Because you go fast. You go fast, right? Yeah, that's why marathon runners are so skinny because they just haven't eaten for weeks. Because they fast. Yeah, exactly. Damn right, they're fast. Yeah, I just want to be quick.

I just want people to look at me and go, wow, that guy looks quick. Even when you're not going quick, you want people to think, wow, he is quick. He's the embodiment of quick. I want people to see. Jimmy stood waiting for Peter by the bridge in the morning because we walk in together. And I want them to look at me and like look at my unflattering jeans and think, through there, I bet there's just some fucking mad twitch fibres going on in his legs. I bet that guy is not being quick right now, but I bet he could be really quick soon.

He's currently building up the quick potential. If I startle him, he may vanish in the blink of an eye. Exactly. You want people, you want the guys at whoever the fuck it is, Nickelodeon movies or something, to wish that they'd cast you in the Sonic the Hedgehog 2020 film. Yeah, when they discover you. Absolutely.

I want Ezra Miller to hang up his flash boots, so he can't be the Flash anymore. It's just Ben, the Justice League and Ben. Not even his last name on the poster, it's just Ben. People know. Yeah, just Ben. Just Ben. That's my goal.

That's my whole goal for this year. quick. I hope you achieve it because that sounds like it would be life-changing. Yeah, it does. Mine's way more boring. I just want to, I just want to move in with my fiance again. You guys fucking deserve it as well. Can I say that? I hope you're happy, genuinely. That's a nice reaction. I expected you to. I honestly hoped. I honestly expected the two of you to go, oh, that's a bit, that's a bit gay. It's fucking linear as shit. Well, you marry her if you want to fuck her so much.

Kissing a girl is gay. Yeah, it's really gay. So thanks guys for not calling me a big gay, gay face. Big G G G G G G G. BGGF, there we go. I just want to do more videos for vidiates, I think, because the fart video was good fun. I want to do more of that. Talk about the fart video. We haven't spoken about that yet. I've not podited since then. Oh my God. Oh, my God. There's one thing I've

been hiding in the wake of that video that I've been very excited to share, but I thought I'd keep it for the first episode back. Oh. So, as you do, I was looking at the analytics of the fart video. Oh, no. And I looked at the external sources tab. And so external sources is basically know how people are directed to your video from outside of YouTube. I think I know where this is going. I noticed in there about 0.5% of the views came from bforums.com. Oh, no. So I try to load up the website. It doesn't tell you any information you've got to make an account. Sorry, so what is it again? BForums.com. BF4. I've got a guess immediately. Yeah, me too. So I made an account with this kind of, you know, a non-serious name.

And in there, well, I'll tell what it is. It's a burp fetish forum. Okay, I thought it might be boy farts. Boy farts. I thought it might be Ben Franklin. Oh, sorry. Oh. No, I knew it would be a fetish site.

Boy farts. It's a boy farts fetish forum. There's your episode name, even though we've had farts. Farts is something fart related as a title for like. It's a specific fetish, but only if the boy is farting. You don't want to see girls doing farts because that doesn't exist. Girls don't do farts. Boys do better, hot of farts.

Yeah. And so, yeah, I dug around on the forum and then in the sub-forum for other fetishes. Oh. And there's another sub-forum called farting. And then within that, there's males farting. So not boy farting, but close. Boy farts. Yeah, boy farts.

And in there, I found a post from a, a user titled The Gas Provider. Oh, God. And his post reads, Vidiots, brackets, super hot British guy doing a fart experiment with some incredible ones. Mikey, congratulations. I made it.

A hot British guy. That validation is, that's otherworldly. So after that, it's got the URL, and then he's put individual time stamps for every fart. Oh. And then at the very end in brackets, burp at 3.13. Every fart.

If you Google search BF and then space forums, it comes up with four results for the battlefield series of games. And then it's burp fetish forums, question mark. New and improved, apparently. Wow. Oh, there's also Brittany Ferries enthusiasts as well. That's another one. Wow.

That's an even dirtier fetish, I think. Yeah, there's some weird ship on there. Yeah. Good. So, yeah, my New Year's resolution. So what are you hoping for, sorry? I want every video I make to be on some kind of fetish forum within a week. Well, you're that hot British guy.

Yeah, down from videos. Super hot British guy. Oh, thanks, gas provider. I'm slightly scared of you because he was the only person really posting. Oh, no. There was a lot of posts in there. You got a big fan. I got three hearts.

Maybe that's what we could do. Like, for future videos from, you know, from videos, we should think about what other fetishes are there out there there's tiny peat big feet we could do that oh nice

yeah spider crotch does whatever spider crotch can spider what oh I see spider crotch

you know everybody saw it yeah it's okay I was thinking of new stuff though you know people like

inflation porn that's a thing yeah vore we could do do some vor so anything relating

to speed Food stuff, speed, yeah. How quick I'm going to be? Cremicure ejaculation fetish. I bet there's something for that. Oh, yeah, I could probably do that. I could practice, I think. Just women, like, sort of degrading you for how quickly you ejaculate.

And then in the background, the Pesiochic theme players. Yeah. But at ten times speed, because I have to finish on the climax. Oh, my God. I tell you one thing I would like to do. this year, viduits-wise. I've done it, gay-wise, viduits-wise, is, uh, is, uh, we will get to question two eventually. Yeah. Is, uh, is I would like us to release a new t-shirt.

Oh, yeah. Because we didn't last year at all. Did we not do anything at all? No, we had no new merch last year. Uh, and also, I would. Yeah, we did last year. We did the new poddiots shirts last year, didn't we? They were last year. Those were, did we? Did we? Were the poddyets shirts last year? Were they at the end of, I feel like we did we did. I feel like we did we did. I feel like we did we did we did. I didn't do any new merch last year. After the end of Vidyat, as it were. You know, when videos ended forever. I want to do a new one.

I want to do a new shirt. And I wanted to say, I love my meat-face prime minister. And I also want us to have a proper fucking website as well. Yeah. But people can go to for Podiat's. And it'll tell them how to join Pod Squad. other stuff like that. That'd be lovely.

We can just send everyone to one place and it'll be nice and simple. Those are two things I want this year for us. Well, those are very sensible. And to go fast. Yeah, got to go fast. Yeah. Would you guys like another question?

Yeah. Yeah, I would. This one comes from Boehler. At Jack without the sea. How would your parents describe you? Oh, God. Boring. Boring.

Oh, we already know the answer for this for you, don't we? Yeah. Oh, I should have learned an instrument. Pretty much. I would hope to think artistic but confusing. Yeah. I think, bless them, they don't really understand anything. Like, YouTube is a mystery to them, but they know I'm doing fun things and I'm relatively happy.

So good for Michael, I guess. He's doing farts on the internet. I don't have to see that video. I don't want to show them out my way. Well, let's hope they're not on BF forum. Yeah. You never know. But you are unlike...

Oh, God. Oh, Christ. Unlike Peter and I, I think you're the youngest by quite a significant way. Is that right? Yeah, yeah. My siblings are old as fuck, so... So your parents technologically wise are probably more out of tune with YouTube than perhaps mine and Peter's are.

That's true. Yeah, they're very technologically out of touch. When I showed my mom how to use stickers on Facebook, she was excited for about six months. That's amazing That's cute A little donut cat Great stuff Thanks Mark

But if only The problem with that is If she understood it a bit more You could make some Much bigger humble brags to her Or not even humble ones Just brag brags You could tell her that like

If you search for If you search for the word Vidiets On Giffy or whatever it is You are a result You're an actual GIF out there Michael hosted elsewhere. You're bringing flashbacks back, I think, from when we were doing videot.

Well, when we were properly doing videos, still doing videots. And I said, oh, we've got like, you know, 40,000 subscribers. And she said, oh, is that all? Oh, okay. Cheers, Carol. Fair enough, Carol. I mean, we all feel that way. It does hurt to hear it from other people.

Especially your mother. Thanks. We just need to put it in terms she can understand. How many Facebook stickers are, is 6,000 Twitter likes worth? One sticker a second. How long were the ticker to send us, well, 40,000 seconds, I guess, but that's... Yeah, but how... That's my quick maths.

One sticker a second. How long would that take? The unsalvable equation. Oh, jeez. It's the kind of shit you do usually see on Facebook. If you can answer this, you're clever. Yeah. Can you read this?

95% of people get this wrong. And then the people from your hometown proudly share it. Yeah, I did it. I got it right. Well done. I think my parents, particularly in the past few years, have become a lot more expressive and like of their, of their, it's not to say that I was an unloved child,

but I think we were all quite British and quite, you know, yes, we, in the lowest times when people were literally bawling their eyes out about something or other, you know, you might have some, a parent telling you, oh, it's okay. You know, you're a wonderful and we love you and da-da-da, but they wouldn't say that

on a regular basis because people don't. You know? That's gay. Facts sake, it's like your fiancé all over again. Yeah, but I don't know for what reason in particular, but we've all, in the past couple of years, just like told each other

that we love each other more. and stuff recently. So I think my parents would be like very upfront about saying, oh, well, we really like what you do and, oh, you work so hard. And yeah, I think they'd be complimentary. And I feel very lucky that I feel that way. Oh, I like, are you speaking hypotheticals here? If they did say that, this is what they would say.

Yeah. I'm sure they'd say it at the moment. Yeah. I thought that counts. It's the potential. Like, Ben's speed potential. it's very important. Yeah.

Yeah. Someone asks them the question. They'd give Peter a firm handshake and take him to a nice castle to look around. Exactly. That's how he knows that they care. Yeah. It's Peter Austin language. I'm also very fortunate in that I have very wonderful, supportive parents.

Am I unfortunate then? Yes. Yes. That's what we're saying. And they've said a few times that they're very proud of me and how hard I worked to get here and so on and so forth. So, yeah, I think they're, I mean, I don't see them very often because I live so far away. But, yes, I think it's, I believe my parents would say that they are proud. Yeah.

And I'll leave it at that. I think that's what it is actually for me is that I think because all of my parents' children have now fledged the nest. I think when we do see each other now, they're a bit more like, oh, you know, I really miss having you around and, you know, all that kind of thing. Whereas when you live with each other, you fucking hate each other. I get a bit sick of it. Yeah. I'm no longer farting in my parents' house. I'm farting on the internet, so that's some improvement.

Which one of you doesn't know how to flush the toilet when you have a shit? It was fucking one of you. File that also under, what's it called, BF forums. BF forums. Oh, that's how to appear a sponsor for this week. A super hot British guy doesn't know how to flush the toilet after he's had a shit. also thank you very much to shreddies again for sending us those fine pants could you at some point like reply to the initial email you sent them and like send a follow-up like

hey here's the video like thanks for sending them or something yeah i did say i'd send over any links to coverage yeah yes it should really really got some people's motors running you could definitely sell those now oh yeah yeah oh yeah you should well maybe i should like make an account well make another account on the forum use my actual name and like you know but hey guys you know I've got the stuff you want if you've got the cash you should I definitely should should should we rule into a thing yeah do you mind if I go first absolutely because mine's quite a small quite a small thing is it I realize I haven't told my Hoover story yeah and I'm just gonna keep you guessing and waiting until the end it's not going to be worth it it wasn't worth it

at the start but now there's tension right yeah I've had guys I've had to go to Burger King I don't know if you saw this KFC is shut I hope you find the police KFC have now got some sort of like vegan option apparently which is exciting so I tried to go to KFC for my vegan option

was shut so I've had to go to Burger King Burger King New plant-based burger not for vegans Yeah, it's good isn't it This is really good Have you not seen this Peter?

No I heard about the The woman I think it was a woman who went into a vegan woman who went into KFC and ordered a vegan

the vegan thing and there was a mix-up with the order and she was given the wrong thing which was like a chicken-based thing and actually been

given the wrong kind of burger yes and she was absolutely outraged and I understand that she didn't want it and no one was going to make her eat it

and I'm sure they would have said oh let me get you a vegan version now there's a mistake. But she was just kind of shocked and appalled at the mere notion that meat had been delivered to her. And I kind of think, you kind of run the risk. If you go into a fast food chicken restaurant that if there is an accident, you might be given a box that has some chicken

in it. That's all I'm saying. You know, by all means. Peter Austin, victim blaming. Victim blaming, yeah. If homeless people can have phones, then vegans can have chicken burgers. Yeah. I'm saying, you know, she should be allowed to have her vegan vegan option but uh you know it was an accident yeah you know anyway anyway chicken's already dead so be wasted wouldn't it most well eat it so fucking suck it up eat the same chicken burger king has launched its first plant based burger in the UK but it is not suitable for vegans and vegetarians ridiculous the soy based version of its wopper burger is cooked on

the same grill as meat burgers Oh, I see. In cross-contamination. Yeah. The fast food chain says the rebel whopper is aimed at those who want to cut meat consumption. So basically for pretentious meat eaters. Oh. I think that's not what the BBC article says.

So that's what they're saying they're not aiming it at vegans and vegetarians. They're just aiming at people who want to eat less meat. Yeah, sort of woke meat eaters who aren't willing to go all the way, you know, cowards. If you just buy some more grills. God's sake It's not marketed towards them It's for the meat eaters Yeah

Okay So yeah Here we go And this is an obvious response to this But a spokesperson for The Vegan Society Called the Launch

A missed opportunity Yes Burger King says that the burger Patty itself is plant-based But because of how it is cooked It will not be labelled As suitable for vegans or vegetarians It will also be served

with mayonnaise Unless the customer asks otherwise Katie Evans Sorry, go ahead Also the chips in Boing aren't vegetarian or vegan Because it's cooked in And they're not

Like the meat oil Oh God I was going to say I think I'm going to say it I think Burger King Chips are the best chips I do miss them

To be fair They are good I don't remember The last time I had Burger King I think I might have had it like twice in my life And I don't remember What the chips are like

To be honest Five Guy Chips though A lot Five Guys' chips are very good but I wouldn't call that like, I don't know. They're sort of like the, that's, that sort of nice, like really special takeaway, yeah, special takeaway. Yeah, that one is.

KFC chips are pretty shit. Oh, KFC chips are shit now. They change them to chunky and I hate them. Oh, boo. I think they're rubbish. They get cold so quick and I just don't think they're very good. So tell us about Katie. Yeah, tell, here you go.

Let's talk about Katie finally. You keep saying Katie Evans. She's just been waiting outside the door. Katie. Katie, Katie, Katie, Katie, Katie. Katie Evans, marketing director, for The Chain, said the burger was aimed at flexitarians. She added it wanted the burger to replicate the flame-grilled taste as closely as possible.

Burger King did confirm, though, that its vegetarian bean burger and its vegetarian option on the children's menu are cooked separately. So they even have the facilities to do that. They don't even have to buy new grills. That was the one thing. I was like, oh, maybe they just don't want to go to the expense. No, they already have the kitchen facilities to make very. eat. Why do they just cook it on the other

grills? Because it's four flexitarian gamins. Now, I'm assuming, as someone who's been privileged enough to go backstage at a burger king, just once in my life, when I worked at the services, and I was late for my break, and my supervisor took me in

through the back of the unit to literally, I watched the microwave my burger. And I was like, what is this? So I think it's flame grilled somewhere, and then... About three months ago. And then it's brought in. But I think that, to be fair,

I think there are some things prepared freshly in store, obviously, otherwise they'd have been called out a long time ago. But I would imagine maybe that the vegetarian options are perhaps microwaved and not put on the grill.

But you're right, there is a way around this. Yeah. They just, I suppose, I suppose if I'm putting my, my devil's advocate horns on, yes. Right?

Watch your eyes, everyone. They're spiky. I suppose what, they've done there is they've backed themselves into a corner by labeling it as a wopper. Because if it's labeled as a wopper, it's got to taste like a wopper. And if the wapper tastes like a wopper because it's flame grilled, then they have to do that. If they'd come up with a vegan meat-free burger that was just called the rebel burger, then maybe they could get away with it because it doesn't have to taste or be prepared like the wopper. But they've been really

silly. You sound a bit like Piers Morgan at the minute, having a go at Greg's sausage rolls. It's not a sausage roll. The thing is, I'm all for vegan options. I love to try them. Like, I, you know, I don't want to eat as much meat, you know. Oh, the Greg's sausage roll so good, too. So good. That's all I ever get now from Greg's vegan sausage roll.

Yeah. So I think, uh, I think they fucked up, obviously, and it's hilarious. And it should, they should have another way to prepare these. But from a brand perspective, I think I can see what they've done there. And it's really, they've really just, they've just fucked themselves, isn't I? Screwed your pooch. You're right, they should just rename it. If the vegan version of that, if the Rebel Burger, the Rebel Whopper,

gives you sort of Dara like some vegan foods do, or give you the trumps, they could call it the Rebel Plopper. Oh, I'd buy that. You know what? I'll email them now. I'm sure they'll be like, that's it. That's what we've been waiting for. Yeah.

Fucking fixed it. Anyway, there we go. That's my thing. Burger King's new plant-based. Vegan and Vegetarian Burger is not suitable for either. I think it's not as, well, I mean, it's kind of embarrassing, but McDonald's, uh, vegan option that they released a couple of days ago, it's just so boring.

It's, like, chicken dippers, but... It's just bread. Pretty much may as well be. It's just the buns. It's like, uh, I don't know, a gujon filled with beans. Oh. So it's just like a bean dipper, I guess. And it's just...

They could have done corn nuggets or something. Yeah. Oh, I would, I would fuck a corn nugget. I know you would. I think we all would. Yeah. Superbar British guy fucks a corn nugget. There we go that's another one on the list.

I think corn nugget is a euphemism within the BF community, isn't it, for a big fart? Oh dear. I just laid down a proper corn nugget. Yes, yeah, we're going to take down big fart. We've controlled us for too long. Big fart. What are we doing here? I don't, this is, I think Christmas has done something to us.

It's chaos. Well, my thing is poop-related. Oh, good. Michael, is your streak continuing? Sadly, not. I was thinking... Excuse me? Your skid mark?

Yeah. My streak? No, sadly, I've opted for something... I've gone for a story, but if you want to segue into it, I'm happy to go straight into my story, because I realized I've got less questions than I actually thought. That's okay. Okay, all right. Yeah, go for it.

This is a tale. I started researching this the other day and like today when I got in from work I kind of found out more and more information I was like oh my god this is this is harrowing but amazing anime is art if anyone ever tells you otherwise

they're wrong for one simple reason even penguins love it let me tell you the story of grape coon grape coon give me your vegan mcnuggies Is Grape Coon a penguin? Grape Coon is indeed a penguin. Okay, I'm ready.

Weird name, but okay. Grape Coon is a penguin at the Tobu Zoo in Japan, who gained much online notoriety for his perceived interest in a cardboard cutout of the anthropomorphic penguin character, Hululu, from Kemono and Friends, after it was placed in his enclosure in late April 2017. I think I remember this, yeah. People said he was in love with it.

Oh, it's amazing. I think after the story came out, more details emerged about his history. So let's do a deep dive in the story of Grape Coon. Grape Coon was born in 1996 at a small facility in Tokyo. He lived at an animal park for the first 10 years of his life and became mates with a female penguin named Midori. In 2006, a newly refurbished penguin enclosure was completed at Tobu Zoo. Grape Coon and his wife were among the couples chosen to move in.

Everything's looking up for Grape Coon He's got a wife He's got a wife He's going to move to a nice new house After moving to Toob Oops, sorry No carry out After moving to Tobu Zoo

That's quite difficult to say a Tobu Zoo Tobo Zoo Taboo There we go That's what it is now Grape Coon and After moving to Tobo Zoo

Grape Coon and Midori Sorry where did he move to They moved to the zoo Tobleron Okay Tobleron Zoo Grape Coon and Midori continued to mate.

They produced a single male chick named Hanpen. However, in the interest of encouraging genetic diversity among the penguin populations at various zoos, the zoo officials elected to send Hanpen to a foster family at a different zoo while he was still an egg. Grape Kuna Midori never saw their chick, and the sudden loss may have caused their bond to deteriorate. Oh no. In humbled penguin society, mated couples usually stay together for their entire lives. However, in 2010, Grape Coon had to be removed from the enclosure for medical treatment.

During his absence, Midori began mating with a much younger male penguin named Denka. Midori, how could you? Bitch! Named what? Denker. Okay. Like Danka, but Blenker. Yeah.

That doesn't help it all, does it? Even among penguins, infidelity seems taboo, and adulterous, humble penguins are often ejected from their flock. Mysteriously, in the case of Grape Coon, that's always good to read that, the opposite occurred. Grape Coon himself became estranged from the flock while Midori and Denker were accepted. It's possible that this happened because Denker was much younger than Grape Coon and was recognised as the fitter male. It's also possible that the other penguins took Grape Coon for dead while he was in the hospital.

Oh, God. Whatever the case, Grape Coon. now found himself alone, but still living in the same enclosure as Midori and her new mate. One can only guess whether a penguin can entertain emotions like grief, but Grape Coon stopped eating during this time. Eventually, it became necessary for his handlers to feed him, as he would not eat on his own. So his things took a turn, poor Grape Coon. Medori and Denka continued to mate, and eventually hatched a chick named beer, as in the drink beer. Bia also lived in the same enclosure as Grape Coon

So per Grape Coon is in this enclosure With his ex-wife, her new lover, and their new child And he's just sat there watching it unfold Presumably he was just called grape at this point Not Grape Coon Well this is I didn't research all that much to be honest But what I could gather

He was just called Grape Coon from the beginning Really? And he happened to be a weeb later on I guess he was destined for it. It's a Japanese zoo, though, right? True. Yeah. So it's not so...

That's a good point. Not so bizarre. Yeah, I tried to find another name, but even like at the beginning of his history, they call him Grape Coon, so I'm assuming he was Grape Coon from day one. Can't wait until he's Grape Senpai. Incidentally, as mentioned above,

Grape Coon and Midori fostered a son named Hanpen. Hanpen, remarkably, was the center of his own opiedal drama, after reaching adulthood, he violently took his foster mother as his own mate. What? A bit of incest, that's always nice, isn't it? Well, it's like, it's like hentai, isn't it? Oh, dear, yeah. Yeah, just like hentai.

Yeah, just like hentai. It's not real. Having lost his mate, and perhaps for the best, never knowing his own son, Grape Koon hit rock bottom. This might have been the final chapter of Grape Koon's life, had a Lulu not come to Tobu Zoo. Fanford In May 2017 Tobu Zoo and the anime show

Kimono Friends held a special collaboration event 50 cardboard cutouts depicting the anthropomorphised animal characters from the show were placed at different locations throughout the zoo

among the cutouts was a humbled penguin character named Hululu which was placed right in the middle of Grape Coon's enclosure up until the Camoono Friends event grape coon had this is a lot of weird words to be saying it's just

you're doing great thanks up until the kimono friends event grapecun had remained isolated and moribund but after hululu's arrival he began moving to the center of his enclosure to stare at the anime character grapecun would try to climb onto the cardboard cutout's rocky platform in order to stand next to it and refuse to leave its side zoo keepers had a difficult time getting grapecun to separate from hululu long enough to eat but they were happy to find that his appetite had returned grape coon began eating on his own and when not standing next to huloo he would splash around energetically in his water pool oh he's looking up he's got his new friend and you know he's got his wifu

unfortunately huloo had to be returned to the exhibition and grape coon died three days later Oh, my God. Well, you're not far off. Oh, God. No other penguins reacted to Hulululi's presence, like Grap Coon, and Zugo has noticed this behavior, too. Grape Coon, the penguin who fell in love with an anime character quickly became an internet star. As word of Grape Coon's anime-spread, officials took notice as well. Chikuta Ikoko, the voice actress who portrays the Hululu character in the Camono Friends anime series. Jesus, that's a lot of words to say, the character who portrays the character in the anime, yeah, traveled.

to Tobu Zoo to see Grape Koon. So he met his idol as well. He's met the real-life embodiment of her. And then a child fell into Grape Koon's enclosure and they were forced to shoot him. When the Kimono Friends event ended, the zookeepers and project managers recognized Hululu's importance to Grape Koon and opted to leave the cutout in place. The zoo began to sell merchandise related to Grape Kuhn as well. And throughout the summer of 2017, his social media present continue to grow, and the zoo enjoyed many new patrons who came to see the famous penguin. On October 9th, caretakers noticed a drop in Grape Coon's weight, despite no change in his appetite. On October 10th, he was removed from the penguin enclosure for medical treatment.

Mindful not to cause Grape Coon's undue stress, caretakers brought Hululu along. Many of Grape Coon's fans offered their well-wishers, but by the evening of 11th of October, grape coon could no longer stand up on his own and required an intravenous drip on the afternoon of 12th October he quietly passed away at Hululu's side Michael! Michael, why did you do that? God. At Hululu's side.

Yeah, because it goes in a bit of detail about penguin deaths here now, so get ready for some science. It's not really science, it's just, yeah. For many penguins in captivity, the cause of death is commonly respiratory in nature, and many suffer from asphyxiation before they die. However, this was not the case with Grape Kuhn, who had passed away peacefully with his beloved Hululu.

It came as a shock to the zoo officials, and so they held a two-week grape festival based around Grape Koon, and it was only a month away. Jakuta I Koko, and the other kimono friend staff, wrote eulogies on their social media accounts. Morners delivered a small whiten mountain of flowers devoted to him, and everyone began a memorial for the poor penguin at the zoo. Some have even begun funding a bronze statue in his honour.

Zoo workers still reeling from the loss were rushing to plan a wake for Grape Coon, details of which have not yet been announced. So where I've copied this from, this was done just after he died, I guess. So I don't actually know if they held the event, I imagine they did. What's he called?

Grape Coon. Grape Coon. Yeah, did he have an event? That's the story of Grape Coon. May his legacy live on? He changed the way. with you, Anami, and he reminded us that our wifus are indeed valid. Oh, there we go. In January 2018, your wifu is valid.

Oh, okay, no, so he died at the end of 2017? What, 2017? Yeah. Yeah. In January 2018, Tobuzo placed a new cutout in the penguin enclosure, featuring Hululu and an illustration of Grape Coon standing side by side. That's quite sweet. Oh, you'll live on forever. That's the sad story of Grape Coon. Oh, God. You could have told us it was the sad story of Grape Coon before we began.

The first line I was going to read there was, Grape Coon was a penguin at the Tootho Zoo. I was like, oh, no, no, don't want to spoil that. Oh, no. Thanks for indulging in my thing. Would everybody like a question? Yeah. I'd love one.

Hang on, I've just got to send you this photo. Hang on a minute. Oh, God. Hang on a minute. Hang right the fuck on. Everyone at home, I do recommend looking through the fan arts because it is beautiful. Oh! Oh, there he is.

Next to Hululu. She doesn't even look like a penguin. She doesn't, does she? She's got headphones. She's got people's skin. This question comes from Ben Mousley at Ben Mousley on Twitter. What one craze slash fad would you bring back from the past, be it fashion or a playground game or anything like that?

I instantly, when I read this, I knew what I wanted to bring back. I don't know if this was like a thing in your playgrounds, but do you remember Diablo's? No. Yeah, yeah, I do. We had like a juggling club in our school that I wasn't a part of. That's very sweet. They used to do Diabloes in the playground. Yeah, Diablo's, it's kind of like, it's a weird kind of circusy juggling toy, I guess is one way we're putting it.

But you just get two sticks attached by a piece of string and the Diablo is like a weird, it looks like an hourglass. hourglass kind of thing. Yeah, it's like an hourglass shape thing. And then you whip it round to make it spin on the rope and you do tricks with it. And I swear to God for six months at our school, that was all anyone did. And like the entire school had diabolos. We were throwing them up in the edge during lunchtime. And there was like battles over who had the best one.

Like people would invest in like some nice sick ones. I spray painted my own Diablo gold. Oh. I did, I pimped my Diablo. Pretty rad. And I want them to come back. I just want people on the lunch break. be out in the park playing with Diablo's fully grown adults because it was good fun.

Yeah? Yeah. You boys, anything that maybe would be a bit fun or maybe I'm just being very nostalgic here and I'm the only one who wants to bring back childhood toys. I really like bouncy balls. They don't get enough press. Actually, bouncy balls are fucking amazing, yeah. You do lose them fast, though. You go through bouncy balls.

You do. You have to have responsible fun, otherwise they go forever. did the girls at your school sort of primary school age have that trend of they would have big ring binder folders that just had loads of stickers in them yeah yeah

and they used to like swap stickers with each other and like they weren't they were all different kinds of stickers it wasn't like you know like having a football stick like an FA Cup like Premier League football stickers magazine it was just like they had all these ring binders and just

various stickers from different franchises or just generic smiley faces or you know just weird stuff and like 3D ones and ones that smelled of stuff you know wasn't that in depth at our school but that's amazing they were really into it he used to just like you just see them all sitting together and they'd like

sometimes swap them with each other and it was a weird strange alien language I didn't understand I didn't sort of talk to girls until I was in my 20s So I don't know. They've always been a mystery to me. They could well have done.

He used to say. What would you bring back then? Pokemon cards. No, because James Farns fucking took my shiny blast oise away. That happened to me too. James Barnes? No, fucking Daniel someone or other

took my shiny blastoice. It was literally. a shiny blastoys. Wow. Did you trade it with him for something far worse and he convinced you that it was worth a trade?

He knew that I had one and he kept asking if he could trade it with me and I was like, no, no. And he said, I'll give you all of these things and he had like this massive stack of energy cards,

a bunch of Pokemon. He was like, I give you all of this. I was like, no, no. He was at my house. And then we went up and we were like playing on the PlayStation or something and then later,

at the end of the day, when he'd gone, to find my Pokemon cards, which were on the kitchen table, and the deck was just, like, twice as thick as it had been beforehand, and he'd made the swap and just taken my blastoyce. Whoa. Wow, that's disgusting. What a dick.

Yeah, for that reason, no. I wouldn't bring back Pokemon cards. There were a couple of times when I was in secondary school where suddenly Game Boys were cool again. Oh, nice. And everybody, like, on the school bus was playing with their Game Boy, and they were either playing Mario or Pokemon and stuff, And it was just, it was weird.

Like, it came around in waves. Like, every couple of years, it'd just be like, right, time to bring the Game Boys in because they're cool. Yeah. And this was about the time, or just before iPhone started to, well, the iPhone released. So, that was the only way of having fun. Yeah. So the Game Boys came back. I think that's fun.

I think Game Boys are fun. People should play Game Boys. The Game Boys are back in town. Exactly. Perfect. Oh, good. Beautiful. Would you like another question?

Or Peter, would you like to do your thing? I can do my thing now, because it's also a fairly brief one. Oh, go for it. I mean, you say... Yes, well, you say, Mikey, that you haven't kept up with your streak, your skid mark, of farty-poopy things. Oh, yeah. But this, I got this story from your Twitter feed.

Really? Yeah. It was a couple of weeks ago. And I was waiting for you to bring it along to put. poddies, and you never did, so I've decided that I will bring it. I'm sure it was you. Maybe it wasn't, but I think you'll, you'll recognize it's from the Bristol Post, so I'm sure it was you. Oh God, okay, yeah. Mom pulls kid out of school because he was given a tuna sandwich after long poo. Yeah, that was me. I've seen that. I can't remember anything about it,

but I remember that headline. Yeah. So good. The little soap heading is a quote. I don't think it's right to let my child starve. So let me tell you the story. And the thing about this story is that the mum has posed for a photo with her son in the background. So essentially her son, directly or indirectly, has signed off on the fact that this story is going out onto national news. Because, yeah, I think, like, it's not that embarrassing when you contain it within the school. And then when you're, I presume his mom approached the papers. and got him involved.

Now, the whole world gets to know about your long poos, Jonathan. And she goes into so much detail. It wasn't just like, oh, he was in the toilet for a while. It's like, long poo. So, okay, here we go. A furious mom said her son, quote, went all day without food when hot school meals ran out at his school. Stacey Jarvis decided to pull her son out of school because of the row,

which left her, quote, fuming. She said, The Year 5 pupil was offered a tuna sandworm. when hot meals ran out because he, quote, took his time on the toilet. Oh, dear. The 31-year-old said

Jaden had never liked tuna and so didn't eat for the whole of the school day. Hull live reports. She says she will keep him out of Thanet Primary School in East Hull until she gets an apology

for making him upset and hungry. Okay. Miss Jarvis said, They pulled me in when I picked the best. Bairns up and said, Jaden will come out and tell you he had no lunch because he took his time on the toilet,

so the only option left was a tuna sandwich and he doesn't like it. I said I was a phone call away and they could have rung me to bring a lunch in, so he was at least fed, not going six and a half hours without food. They said... How long is the second half of their school day? Six and a half hours.

They said, I was too busy to give you a call. So I said, all the staff in this school and no one could give me a call. call, I was fuming. Then there's another subheading for this upcoming section. It just says, he was having a poo. Quality journalism.

I feel sorry for this woman because... The woman? I feel sorry for this woman, yeah. Because I feel like this is obviously a ludicrous story. And they're making her sound like a fucking lunatic. Right, yeah. But I still get where she's coming. Like now that I've heard what she's had to say.

Yeah, I get what she's coming from. refused to eat they should have called regardless of what he was or wasn't doing that prevented him from eating yeah the mum still should have been notified he's what 10 if he's a year 5 yeah he's at 9 or 10 so they they should have called but the fact that it was because I'm sure we're about to discover how it came out that it was because he was having a long poo but I feel so sorry because the whole post have just heard that and thought fucking gold here we go they don't give a shit about this child's welfare no they don't joke about I love poo.

So, he was having a poo. He usually, this is still a quote from her, this is her telling his story. He usually gets a hot meal, but he was having a poo, and there was nothing left. But they apparently made three year sixes, a cheese sandwich, but Jaden only got offered a tuna sandwich. What? This is so fucking petty. What? Oh my God.

Yeah, it's mad. I hear, the school is totally in the wrong here. This is amazing. Yeah. Stacey said she got into a row with the head teacher the following day. The mum, who is pregnant with her fourth child, not sure why that's relevant. Continued. I tried talking to the head about it, but her attitude was, I never got told.

So I said, this is why I've come to you. You're meant to know about issues that go on with parents and pupils. I said, it won't happen again. I've told him, you don't stay at school without any lunch. you come home and she said I don't think that's right to tell your child

to leave school don't know why she's got such a deep voice It's strange isn't it Yeah and I said Well I don't think it's right to let my child starve

She said It's very he said She said this She said We would have to ring the police if you did that I said Would you like it

If your child was at school With no dinner And she said I'm sure there's ways Around it But I said Well there's not been

She said She says, still, it goes on. My God. She said, I don't like the way you speak to me. And she said, sorry, I said, I don't like how Jaden was at school all day without food. Really getting to the core of the problem here. This is amazing. Yeah.

That's astonishing. That might be where it peaks. Is that new story actually just a live blog? And they're still updating it because she's still telling the story. I think so. Little timestamps after. every message. A spokesman for Than...

And she said. A spokesman for Thannet Primary School said, Thalett Primary School ensures that every people at the school is provided with a nutritious meal at lunchtime. Parents are always welcome to contact the school to discuss their child's meal options. Oh, and that's the end. That's it. It doesn't say, we warn children not to have long poos. Well, that's what's so weird about it is that the whole post of editorialized this whole story

and made it about the long poo. When the real story is, 10-year-old who doesn't like tuna sandwiches was given no food all day. But that's not clickable. It wouldn't be here without that headline. Fucking journalism. Thank you Michael Johnson for that story

and the whole post or whatever it was called. Wow. I remember reading the story, but I skimmed over it. And I think you need it to be read to you to really enjoy and appreciate the events that unfolded there. You need to hear the story. word poo. Yeah.

The thing is, the school were decent about it and said, oh yeah, because he took a long time on the, on the toilet or in the toilet. Yeah. The mum has clearly told the newspaper, oh, yeah. Well, it's because he was doing a long poo. To be fair, she's pregnant as well. Yeah. Which probably doesn't make the situation any easier.

And as we all know, pregnancy is basically just a big long poo, isn't it? It is, just the longest poo. so she's she she understands yeah i feel like it was like a phone interview between this woman and the reporter and she just kind of blurted out he was doing a long poo it was on the toilet yeah they've just snipped off the second half of that and just yep we're running with the first bit we've got a direct quote here from the mother he was doing a long poo her account of affairs they've literally just not even taken the good information out of it they've just published it in it you can tell she's angry you can

Hell she is. Just she said, I said, she said, I said. I want to hear from the kid. Maybe we're misreading this entire situation. It's not that he took particularly long in the toilet time-wise, but he just produced a very long poo. So long it broke the kitchen? So long did it put him off his lunch?

Maybe. Or maybe he's a tuna racist, and that's the real story. Yeah, it's kind of racist. Yeah. Ben, would you like to tell your Hoover story? I'm sure everyone's filled with anticipation. People ready? Are you sure? I think we're going to have to go for it, aren't we?

I'll tell you a bit, and then I'll tell you another bit on the next podcast. It's slightly rowsian gym, but the second half's chewed up by the machine. So, I went to Hoover in my bedroom, right, do a little bit of vacuum cleaning, as you do. A little bit of mud fell off my shoe, which was really annoying. So I wanted to hoover it up. And I went to hoover it. You guys will never guess what happened. It went up to the tube.

It did not go up to the tube. What? And that is where we leave it for this week. Oh, my God. I genuinely, fuck off. Peter, by the way, I just had some correspondence here from the continent. Oh. Are you ready?

Yeah. I hope it plays. Here we go. Oh, what? Google's updated. What? Can you not text a speech anymore? Voice output isn't available for German.

What? No. Change it to Dutch. You want it in Dutch? Maybe. Let's try it in Dutch. Hang on. Give me a second.

I don't speak any Dutch, but some of the words probably is a bit similar. Oh, no, voice output isn't available for Dutch. What's happened? Oh my God, this is a nightmare. What's going on? robot lady's vocal chords. Is English available? Because you could translate it into German and then get the English voice to try and say it. Oh, okay. Yes, good idea. Just to make it even more difficult to understand. Hang on. I've just got to put it back into German so I can copy it out.

Do you want it in Galician? That's a fun one, isn't it? German, okay, bear with me. Just got to select this whole, this whole flipping thing. Copy. How are you doing? I've just tested it and German lady works on my machine. I'm doing it on my phone. So maybe the web browser version's been stripped right back. Oh, that sucks. I mean, their email attachment isn't playing. Oh, shit, Google, you bastard.

Voice out, but isn't available for English. What? But that's the best language. That's the only language that matters. Okay, we'll have to... I'm so sad. Let's just give us a no-context message about long poos next week, next fortnight. Yeah.

I could read it to you in English if you want to translate it into German. If you like Holy shit my dude Did you hear about that sad penguin Who got cheated on Fucking sad my man So happy to hear about your gay fiancee desires though Happy New Year Peter

You are very tall That's far too much for me to even remember I didn't remember the English But it was holy sheiser at the beginning Very good That's enough, yep good Yeah Yeah well

I mean what more can Boris Johnson take from us? The second half of the Hoover story. The robot lady. Oh, second half. You're in for a fucking Skywalker saga of the Hoover story. Fucking Boris Johnson. He took Kevin.

The rebel Bopper. That is now in charge of the country. Johnson. Dick, Dick. Big shit. Yeah. Long poo. I love my long poo, Prime Minister.

Have we got a final question, Michael? Yeah, we'll go for it. That was wonderful, Peter, thank you. You're welcome. Wow, just new stories about poo. Really touch the heart, don't they? Yeah. Bradley at Bradley Tiernan on Twitter says,

What part of meme culture from the last... Pape. Meem pop. That's what I do. I'm a meme pop. What part of meme culture from the last decade has had the biggest impression on you? Is there one that you still find yourself quoting from years ago? So this is kind of a wrap-up of the best memes of the decade. What's some favourites?

Maybe not the one ultimate one, but what's some ones you want to look back on fondly? God. I really appreciate the Simpsons Revolution that's been going on over like the last four years, it feels like that. Yeah, yeah. Like the Simpsons Wave and like the weird kind of... Steemed hams.

Steamed hams. Yeah. steamed hams was up there i think for me steamed hams have i ever said this on the podcast before that you know the the stupid remixes i used to do of stuff yeah i i did a steamed hams remix in about 2012 or something wow wow holy shit before steamed hams was a meme really yeah it was it was it was it was a real it was when it was like still learning how to even do it so it was just a drumbeat and then, like, basically doing the entire sketch, but just to the beat.

Yeah. But, yeah. And that, you know, that I always found that a bit weird that then years later, all these steamed hams things came out. Oh. You reckon that's still hiding on a hard drive anywhere, or is that gone? Possibly.

It's really not very good, but I could at least get it to prove it. You can be acclaimed to fame, yeah. Like, I fucking did it. Find it. Shrek is another good one from last 10 years. That was a cultural revolution. And obviously Shrek was a good film, but it's only in the last, like, you know, a couple of years ways he's become the neutral man of the internet. Everyone loves him.

Yeah. Yeah. It's like 20 years old that film. Shit, fuck. Oh, God. Yeah. How crazy of that? 2000 or something. Yeah. 2004 was it? No, it was before that.

Really? Oh, 2001. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Nearly 20 years old. Nearly 20, yeah. Crazy. Fuck, I'm trying to think. I feel like we're just on a like an annual cycle of memes. Yeah.

Like, you know, there was like the meme revolution. And I'm not talking internet shit posting, which has been going on since the internet existed. But like the meme revolution, I feel really kicked in in like 2011, 2012. Yeah. With all the original template memes where you had text at the top and text at the bottom. Yeah, they're like demotivators or whatever they were called. Yeah.

Yeah. And they just feel so archaic now. The internet is literally the death of comedy. Like, the stuff that we find funny now is so obscure and so not traditionally conventionally funny. It's amazing. It really is amazing. Like, what is funny on the internet is just,

if you showed that to someone 30 years ago, they wouldn't even consider it a joke, would they? Yeah, I, someone told me about this, like, really in-depth thought piece on, like, the analysis of like that style of humor and not necessarily like why it's funny because it's hard to you can't really analyze why something is or isn't funny

but it was just how you know over the past 50 to 100 years of pop culture comedy has you know changed in various ways like you know there's a long period of where slapstick was like the absolute pinnacle and stuff and the way they described like internet meme culture was just it's kind of in a way it's just a form of sort of

surrealist comedy but it's also it's that whole thing of like it's like having an in joke with your friends but everyone gets it like in it often like the first time you see a meme like a new meme a new meme format you don't think the very first one that you see is like particularly funny you might go ah ha that's a slightly humorous observation on society but then when you see that format like played over and over again in like different ways people putting their own spin on it then it becomes a like an in joke that everyone shares and that's partly why it's so funny yeah so yeah it's a stonks it's not even funny it's just like a weird mannequin head next to some like a chart of stocks and it just says stonks that's not funny but it is funny yeah

no matter how important you think you are this man brings the cubes and it's a fucking fridge with a face on it. It's like, why is that, that shouldn't be funny? Why is it funny? Yeah. Another one word of Harambe.

That's, yeah. The, the emotions were held in that name. Oh my God. Yeah. And I'm just looking at a tweet

from air, at CNN dated May 31st, 2016. Would Donald Trump have killed the gorilla? Yes. Yes, he definitely would have. That's not even a question. He would have.

told everyone, as he was taking aim, he would have said, I'm the best at shooting guerrillas. I'm one of the, you know, I know a lot about killing gorillas. I know more than anyone else, probably. I've shot more gorillas than anyone else in history. Yeah. We have the biggest guerrillas. We have the deadest gorillas.

Yeah. Now watch this drive. Fuck. Yeah, I think just sort of meme compilation. Vine was a big thing, obviously. That changed sort of the game in many ways in that you could have short, sort of a few second long videos even while Vine was still ongoing

but especially after it was shut down you could have memes sort of evolved into short clips that then were put into compilations and could be shared on Twitter and Facebook and all over the place. It put meme production in the hands of the people in the easiest way possible and it meant anything could happen,

anything could become a meme and I think that's magical. Yeah, I think my favourite, But I'm sure there's like some really, like, big memes that I can't think of right now. But overall, it's like the concept of, what's it called, YouTube? YouTube Haiku. You're aware of the YouTube Hauteu subreddit? It's basically just important videos, but people submit new stuff all the time. It has to be shorter than, I think, 14 seconds.

So it's, it really is just like the subreddit for important videos. Yeah, so it's like short videos that could be considered poetic. Under 14 seconds is a haiku, under 30 seconds is poetry. And it's beautiful. And they're all just like ridiculous things. You know, I can't even think of an example, but yeah, it's like important videos, really. Yeah. Fantastic.

Yeah, I think YouTube Haiku came a bit before Vine, maybe. So it just keeps getting distilled down. So, I mean, yeah, maybe it's just two frame memes. That's the future. Yeah. Yeah. We're just going to go back to pictures. Whoa.

Oh, crazy. Oh, lovely. Thank you for the meme, catch-up, roundup, boob-b-b-b-ed-up. Thank you for the memesic, the songs I'm singing. Anyway, there we go. Thank you very much, everybody, for listening. Just before we go, store.orgscast.com will soon be home to new viduets merchandise because we have spoken, and it probably won't happen for a very long time.

But who knows, we can hope, right, maybe. You said soon. Soon. But what does soon mean? Mike, is there a discount code of people wanting to go there? I think there might be, actually. Use code vidiates, surprise, at checkout for 10% off everything. That's just vidiates, not Vidiates surprise.

Vidiates and surprise in small, lowercase, italics. You've got to try and figure out a format that, that's your problem. But yeah, use code vidiates at checkout for 10% off everything on the Oggscast store. you can use that to buy a Yog's Cass calendar, the Bodega Book, Chiluminati Retrohuddy, all these fine quality garments

and of course our own. And get your orders in now for our current merch because when the new one comes out, you should give us your money now and later. That's how it works. Yeah, that's it. Perfect. That was convincingly delivered

and I think they've all gone and done it. Thank you. Wow, look, my coin purse. versus, oh, it's all the flooring. Thank you, everybody. Whoa, listen to all those headphone jacks. That's amazing. YouTube, Twitter, Facebook, all.com forward slash Vidiot's Official.

And Twitch.tv.tv. Forward slash Vidiot's Official. We streamed there sometimes. I actually streamed their weekend just gone. I streamed over the weekend with my friend Ben. Also called Ben. It's confusing. We played a little bit of Alan insulation.

So if you'd like to see that, I imagine the Vod may well be. up on the channel. If not, it will be up soon. But yeah, we'll probably do some more streams in 2020, so keep an eye out for those. Go follow there if you haven't already. Yes. Streamlabs.com forward slash video it's official. To donate and get a shout out and join Pod Squad, just like these amazing people. Big Titty Jesus 42, Lord Brotovich, Stedman, 6413, Ami Dosange, Crispy Hoysen Al,

Cap'n Lugie, Nanmaster Gash, Kilo Clouds, Stephen Scots, Crucififan Fiction, Carrie the worst, Boppis Ray Boppros. I don't know, I like that one. Triple Jump and Coltholic FC. Lord Brotovic, Tommy the Wank Engine, Chav Chavramarres, Ode Oli, Benface, Benface, Bon Bonbon, Bonas, Emily Lemons. Those are the Pod Squad for this week. Thank you very much for your support.

Lord Brofis was in there twice. He was, his second comment said, I'm not sure if I already did it, but here we go again. So thank you very much, Lord Brasovich. And if you would like to join PodSquod, you can do streamlabs.com forward slash viduets official. YouTube.com forward slash team triple jump if you want to see what Peter and I are up to on a daily basis. Isn't that right? Tiny Peter. Yeah.

Have you still not checked us out? What are you doing? We're doing shows over there that will remind you very much of the Vidyat's days, the bygone time. You know, we do prove it. We do a piece of cake, but it's now called Rules Boss. we do worst games ever we do a podcast we do lists

we do it's a veritable veritable bounty of fun we kook as well we do kooking yeah and also if you're asking video game questions

when we ask for questions firstly stop secondly if you want a video game podcast Peter and I do a video game podcast so go and check that one out Mikey hello

you're still hip-hopping and bit bopping over at that there Yogscast, right? What are you working on, mate? I never stop BitBob hip hopping. As always, it's lots of very secretive stuff, but if you want to keep up to date with the stuff as it releases, go follow me on Twitter at Parrot Boy for Fun Stuff and Sleeping Ferrets. Yes. Go see Mikey's viral tweet.

Try not to catch anything. Finally, leave us an iTunes review or a review slash rating on your platform of choice. It helps something to do with algorithms. don't understand them, but supposedly if you leave reviews, it made some kind of different. How are we going to get the outro music to play? And does anybody have an idea for a final question? Meme of the year, the decade? Yeah, let's go Meme of the Decade. What's everyone's personal meme of the decade? Yeah. Sounds perfect. Last time we sung the outro. My cassette just broke, sadly. Oh, for God's sake. Did it melt? Like Rosie and Jim

Well, the batteries fell out and then the ruled under the little hole in our floor, which I'm scared to look in, so I don't want to go near that, sadly. I can't do the dictate speech thing on my phone, so I can't, robot lady can't help us out. Peter, have you got anything that you could try? I could sign it. Go.