Podiots - Podiots: Episode 64 - FALL BACK

Episode Date: November 3, 2020

Peter bites the bullet, Mikey's gone to Action Park and may never return, and Ben's unearthed drama in the queer penguin community. Donate £3 or more to get a shoutout and join the Pod Squad! - https://streamlabs.com/podiotsdonations/ New merch: http://smarturl.it/Podiots Twitch: Twitch.tv/vidiotsofficial YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/vidiotsofficial Twitter: https://twitter.com/VidiotsOfficial Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/vidiotsofficial Discord:  http://bit.ly/VidiotsDiscord   Ben and Peter's channel 'TripleJump': https://www.youtube.com/teamtriplejump   Follow the gang on Twitter: Ben: @Confused_Dude Peter: @ThatPeterAustin Michael: @ParrotBoy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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during the Volvo Fall Experience event. Conditions supply, visit your local Volvo retailer or go to explore Volvo.com. Hello? Good start. Hello? Anybody there? Is anybody there?

It's not spooky anymore, is it? No, it's nowhere. Could have been, but it's not. It's illegal, we're not. The statute of spooketations has, has passed now. Yeah, that's right. October 31st rolls around.

It's illegal to be seen outdoors being spooky and you will be apprehended. Oh yeah. It's Christmas time now. That's it. Is this Merriots then? Oh, that sounds a bit too close to a hotel chain. We might get done for that. Jingleot's.

Jingleets. Jingleet sounds a bit too close to jingles, actually. Yeah, you can't say jingles, can we? Don't say jingles. Christyotes? Christyates is good. Christyates. Jesus.

Jesus Christ, yes. Jesuits. Oh, good. It rolls off the tongue. I like it. Yeah. With all the jazzes at the start there that I did. Yeah.

Jes, Jesuits. Jesuits. What about, um, uh, figgy pudding. Ey-y-y-y-y-y-puddingy-y-y-pudding. Perfect. Figgie pudding. Doesn't it sound horrible? Ficky pudding?

If you ever had figgy pudding? No, of you? No. What is fiddie pudding? I assume it's figs, yeah. Probably. No, it's pudding, Michael. Oh, hmm.

It's awfully figgy. Whatever it is, it sounds like it keeps you incredibly regular. It does, isn't it? Fire right out of you again. Undigested. I sort of, I'm impressed by how, after saying no Halloween talk, and then sort of ironically starting to talk about Christmas, we're now having a conversation about Christmas.

Yeah. I'm just, figgy pudding got me on, got bread and butter pudding in my head, which, admittedly, I've never had it in my life, and I didn't realize

it's literally just slices of bread in a pudding. Like, the main ingredient is bread. It is. It's delicious. Is it? I mean, I like bread. I like butter and I like pudding,

so I can't see why I wouldn't like it. You have to get it right. It can be a bit soggy, I find. Yeah. Soggy pudding. It basically has the consistency of a steamed pudding that you would have with a custard or an ice cream. Yeah. It's pretty good.

Steamed puds. Yeah. What are we doing? I think we're doing a podcast. Are we recording poddiots right now? We just chatting and chatting to each other. Recording puddietts. That's the one.

Puggy puddyets. Oh. These are getting worse, aren't they? The first few minutes of the podcast are we? It was a bit rough. Hello everybody and welcome to Podiat, the official. Bidians, podcast. It's a conversational podcast where we take some questions from you at home and obey the law of the three errs, where everybody brings a thing along to talk a band.

I'm Ben I'm Peter and I'm Michael How the dickens are you all Whoa I dare you say that Sorry how the penis are you all

Thank you Penises and zins are you all I'll admit I'm a bit stinky at the minute Oh no What's new? I just What's new? Wow

rude That's the main thing that's going on My life is fact I haven't showered today But this is to be a recurring theme That's it I haven't washed Before the show you told us You haven't drank any water

I'm falling apart What's going on over there Mikey What's the What's the problem I'll be honest Have you ever heard of a game Called Cookie Clicker Oh no

Yes I have I've fallen back into that And it's literally every waking hour I spent looking at this screen Racking up cookies How far have you? got? Yeah, what is the... I know about what it is, but is it, does it really have that kind of hold on you? It's, it's weird. I like, it's just, it's just, it's this natural instinct.

That's like, numbers are going up. That's good. I like that. Let's make those numbers bigger. Yeah. I'm currently producing 857 billion cookies a second. Wow. And I've, I discovered there's actually, like, there's a proper community behind cookie clicker. And I've read into it more. And apparently, the end game takes four or five years to get to of pretty consistent place. Jesus. Isn't it all done, it's all just sort of done like in Notepadge, like the visual style is, or does it not look like that anymore? Oh, it's been taught to revamp now.

It looks amazing. Wow. It's a pleasure to go-cap for 14 hours a day. Let's see, cookie clicker. My goodness. Oh, no, Peter, Peter, don't open it. Yeah, Peter's not going to be able to do the rest of the podcast. No, I just want to see what it looks like.

Because it used to, didn't it used to just be, is it, how'd you pronounce that? Asky art? Aski, assy. Yeah. Yeah. Just letters, as I say, like a notepad document or whatever. But, uh, wow, look at that. I've got prisms, time machines, army of grandmas.

It's great. Cookie clicker. Right, I'm now here. Robot burgers bake. Okay. I've looked up cookie clicker original and there isn't any, there are no images where it used to look like that. I think there wasn't there a separate, there was a very similar thing as well that, yeah. Oh, you may be thinking of dwarf fortress.

Uh, I don't have to think of dwarf fortress. Oh, no. Uh, candy box. Oh. Yeah, that had candies and lollipops, but it was a very similar thing. It's like you would plant candies. They would turn into like lollipop trees, which would then make more candies. It was kind of the same thing.

Um, and that was all done just with, you know, it looked like a. Oh, yeah. I remember this one. Game Facts or something, you know. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I bought a grandma. Oh, you got a grandma?

Well done. I bought a grandma. Congratulations. It's like worms. Yeah. So this is it, huh? This is what... Eventually, the game starts playing itself, and that's the best game.

I'm going to buy another grandma. What do the grandmas do? Don't get too into it, otherwise you won't be able to shower anymore. I've got no one to stink up, it's okay True I'm just blending in with the ferrets at this point so it's all right Yeah

That's fine Anyway, that's me How are you boys I bought a third grandma Whoa, three grandmas You greedy boy How does that even work? I'm going to close it now

There we go, I don't need that I don't need that in my life What have you been up to? No clicking of cookies, I take it um god i don't know i mean i've been away for a few days you're thinking really hard about whether or not you've been clicking cookies no i'm trying to think what i can and can't say because my thing is about something that happened to me while i was away so you know i've got a

i've got a hang fire but uh yeah i've spent spent a couple of days in northumberland just with amy in a self-catering like air bnb so we it was we were able to do it without coming into contact with any other human beings apart from on one day we went and had a socially distant meal out but apart from that we've been nice and isolated isolated nice a nice nice lovely that's nice are you guys ready for lockdown too oh boy yeah I can wait yeah sequel to lockdown it's going to be good it's going to be worse when it happens over Christmas that'll be really lovely landing. They could have maybe done it, you know,

if they'd done it sooner, it might have just eased at Christmas, but no, they waited until now it can only be over Christmas. Yes. Brilliant. Yeah, let's delay it so much that when we have to take action, it's at the worst possible time. The economy needs all that money

to feed poor children, right? But the economy, Michael. The economy. The economy. Oh, great, great. Anyway, I'll tell you what economy is a robust one, yeah? What economy is got? Yeah, well, we know that. Eight billion a second.

At least 12 grandmas on that operation, I assume. I have no idea. It's actually 14. 14. 14, all grandmas. And they're making a lot of cookies, holy shit. No, of course, I'm talking about Pod Squad. If you would like to support us financially, it really, really does mean the world to us and helps us out a lot with running costs and things.

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You get a shout out at the end of the show as well. Streamlabs.com forward slash potty it's donations. Would you like a question, boys? Yes, please. Yes. This is from Jack Without the Sea at Jack Without the Sea. It's pronounced Jack Oh my god

How did I pronounce it Jack But you pronounced it with the C I think Yeah sorry I pronounced it very wrong You hear a knock at your door You open the door

It's delete as appropriate Mikey, Peter Ben And Exhibit They're all here to pimp your ride What are you having done To turn your car Into the car of your dreams

Oh my God I would like my car to have Tim Westwood Just all over it Fall back Fall back Just problematic Tim Westwood

Going to university campuses And apparently being really creepy Oh good That's seemingly what he does nowadays I want to listen to Tim Westwood Before he became like he is as a child he must have been normal he must have been a good little boy yeah something went wrong timothy westwood yeah

yeah that's it actually Timothy northward thank you oh Timothy South Forest Timothy correct side of the tracks would from the nice part of town oh god so let's start with you Michael okay I'm gonna go for a fartmobile okay I was gonna say you currently don't have a vehicle Right? True. That's a requisite of getting on, Pimp My Ride, isn't it?

So let's pick you a car to start with. Like, what car are you going to Pimp? Could I just grab a ferret cage and mod that? Yeah. That's what I've got at hand, because I can't afford a car right now, so the best I can do is a cage. They've got wheels on them, so... Oh, what if it's got wheels? So that's fine. Like a sort of carriage. It's like a ferret drawn coach with... You can sort of... whip some rains and say yeah and off they go is that yeah yeah i'll incorporate the ferretin so that would be good um it's it's powered by pure methane it's very environmentally friendly it converts it into nice smelling rose smells everywhere i go the the smell of the ferrets is

disguised by this lovely rose smell um it's got to have hydraulics i want to be bopping up and down the street everywhere i go yeah yeah um oh i remember One of my favourite bits of Pimp My Ride was on one episode where they were looking around this person's car and just in the front of the car they had a sticker that said it's fun to fart on your friends and sadly that didn't survive the makeover so I'm going to make that part of my makeover

I want that big bumper sticker that says it's fun to fart on your friends. It's fun to fart on your friends. Isn't it just? Isn't it just? I think I'm going to make it works that it can drive in any direction

oh so like there's going to be a spinny chair in the middle so I never actually really need to turn the car I just make it's like a weird tank that can go in any direction because you just get the ferrets to run whichever direction you want and they'll drag it in that direction I guess we have one ferret on each side of the cage so then yeah and then whenever I want to go somewhere there's a ferret treat dispenser which tells them where to go

and obviously some spoilers some sick spoilers Oh, you need a spoiler. Snape kills Dumbledore. Oh, man. No, kills Tywin, Lannister. He doesn't. He doesn't. He does fuck his aunt, though.

Yeah. Someone's just panic quit the podcast. They haven't been here. No, Game of Thrones. A beloved series, which everyone definitely didn't forget about after the last season. Yeah, no one talks about it anymore. No, they don't, do they? The only time people talk about it is to say, wow,

nobody talks about it anymore what a legacy yeah incredible work by the the team there really good Peter what's your base vehicle well so the three of us I think are coming from

three different angles so you do have your own car I should know I remember it bearing down on me at 25 miles an hour hang on it was not you can't edit the narrative like that I was going very slowly you were going incredibly slowly

25. You would be so hurt. Yeah, I know. That was the problem. It felt like 25, even though it was about 5. There's a rolling, just rolling towards you. It's such a funny bit. It's just, the visual of it's so weak, but the fear in Peter is palpable on set. It was just, it was terrifying. Yeah, I was fine until the camera started. Well, no, I mean, we filmed the dressing process as well. But as soon as you sort of stood back for the wide, I was like, hang on. What are we doing here again?

What's happening? Oh no. It's like a scene out of Fast and Furious film like this dark garage, Ben turns on the car, the headlights come on. Yeah, it's just rum rum rum. Yeah, the most menacing vehicle. Context for anyone who's baffled by this.

I mean, I don't know how you've not seen this video if you're listening to Pottiates, but Ben hit me with his car while I was wrapped up in bubble wrap on idiots. Some say that's when we jumped the shark at Fidiotts. Do you think of? There was no, no, no, I'm saying. it. There was no, there was no coming back, but there was also no, I think, exceeding that

moment. Maybe so. You know, that's when we reached peak idiots and I don't know what we could have done apart from hit you with a bigger vehicle. We could have got maybe another copy of the Little Britain DVD game and played that in full. That was somewhere up there. Like how we corrupted the game. Yeah. I wouldn't say we jumped the shark. We back flipped over that motherfucker. Yeah, we fucked that shark up. Indeed. We wrapped the shark and bubble wrap and

bubble wrap and ran over it. But as I was going to say, before I got distracted by about, by you me knowing that you have a car because I was hit by it. Yes. You do have a car. Mikey doesn't have a car.

I, in the past week, have acquired a car, but it's not mine. It's my mum's. I mean my mum's car. I'm in my mum's car, broom, brum, which is very nice at the moment. Just because everyone's working from home and stuff, they have both cars at their house.

And they were like, we're just not using one of them. And it's going to just seize up. Or we're going to have to just keep running it around the block. So they brought the car up, parked it in my garage socially, distantly. I left it there for a couple of days and then got in it. Because they're like looking after my grandparents. So we didn't want to come into contact with each other at all. we're doing the sensible thing

but anyway we've ended up with a car here which is nice but not mine so I'm pimping my mum's car broom broom nice it's a Ford Fiesta it's a very good reliable car

that's when you've got like an okay car the biggest compliment you pay it is it's very reliable it's incredibly reliable it's hardly needed any work doing to it at all and it's about I don't know 15 years old or 10 years old or something and it's just still going.

It's a fiesta, isn't it? It's a fucking party on wheels. It is, absolutely. But just to make it a true party on wheels, when Amy and I were away over the long weekend, we've already got National Trust sticker in the windscreen so we can go to the National Trust. We also have now joined English Heritage in true Peter Austin style in his mum's car, Broome, broom. Very good.

I think I'm going to need a bigger windscreen to start with for all of my culture, historical site parking stickers. Yes. So that's the first and most important thing. Loads of windscreen space so it can get into all of these castle car parks without having to pay. Beyond that, I mean, who needs a pimped ride when you can just drive to a castle, am I right?

Yeah, that's pretty pimping. What if you turned your entire Ford Fiesta into a castle? Into a moving castle, yeah. Oh, nice. Mum's moving castle. Yes. So you've built around the chassis of the original car, and you're just on the ramparts at the top with a steering wheel.

Yeah. Like Mr. Bean. Like Mr. Bean. Just like Mr. Bean, yes. That's kind of it. I guess maybe put a bit four-wheel drive on it and some good tyres so that I can get to the real wilds of Britain. But other than that, you know, that's all I need, a castle on wheels.

Amazing. Beautiful. What about you, Ben? What are you going to do with your own actual car that belongs to you? Well, as you both know, my car is already sort of perfect and doesn't need pimping at all. It's a very cool car. it's hip and goes fast it doesn't sort of seize up to the point

where sometimes you'll have to drive it for a bit where the wheels don't turn yeah no that's never happened I'm rusted up and the wheels weren't turning I tell you what's never happened is when I drove it once after a couple of months of inactivity around the car park and the right rear wheel was so seized up

that it just dragged along the floor. I made it sound like I was doing donuts in the car park and everyone came to their windows to look at the very slow, tiny vehicle just driving in a straight line. With only three wheels turning and one dragging like a limp dog. And you know what then didn't happen? What didn't happen? Some guy leaning out his window and going,

I think one of the wheels is seized up. Thanks, yep, cool, yeah, I know. Because that's never happened, obviously there's nothing wrong with the car. So if I were to pimp it, I'd probably get the air conditioning fixed. I would maybe see about getting the dead spider removed from the rear brake light. I don't know how to get it out. So that's... Exhibit comes to your front door with a camera crew.

What would you like done to the car? Oh, could you just get rid of the spider fruit? to get the spider out of there. Exhibit's going to take one look and just be like, no, this isn't for me, you need my... Fallback. You need my far less impressive brother, show and tell, to come and get the spider out.

Oh, God. I'd put, like, some sort of cow catcher on the front, made of bouncy castle, just in case I hit a Peter. Because it does happen, as we've seen. Cow bouncer. You don't catch anything. Your chances of running over Peter are low,

but they are never zero. No, that's absolutely right. So you need to be prepared. And then, like Mikey says, a spoiler, because you've got to have a spoiler. What about, um, oh. I should get a PS2 in the front. PS2.

Yeah, one of PS2 built into the dashboard. In fact, just take up the whole windscreen with a really big CRT. The best thing about the PlayStation's or TVs in the front of the car is you obviously can't use those when you're driving. So, what? You're just going to go out and sit on your driveway playing PlayStation, like, at home? I think I heard a story about, like, maybe it was that specific one,

or it might have been a different Pimp My Ride, where they, like, took loads of shit out of it after they finished filming. We've talked about this, yeah. Yeah, is that right? Was that the PS2 one? We did a worst games ever recently, Pimp My Ride Street Racing, and we talked about how we'd heard this, and we don't really know if it's true

or where it came from, the claim that, yeah, they then just remove all the stuff afterwards. Yeah. Yeah. I could not do that. I'd keep that car forever, even if I never draw of it. Some of those cars, they look really weird today. So strange.

My Ride car. We're both Googling at the exact same time there. Let's have a look. I remember when we played Pimp My Ride, the other one, where you can ghost ride, to the whip, which I think was at Vidiot's that worst games ever. Yeah, he goes riding the whip, that was it.

One of the clients was, she was a fashion student and so we put a sewing machine in the bed of the truck. Oh, why? Why? Who's going to sit in the back? I remember that. Like, outside as well. Like, it was a, you know, it was a pickup truck

and it was just in the bed, you know? Just googling it now. Well, look at that car. That's a real beauty of a car. This one, this one has it. chocolate fountain in the back that's not good over a speed book that first one you posted has some sort of

is that just loads of weed in the window what's that there what's that green stuff I don't know maybe it's a horrible inlay like a carpeted inlay oh my god the chocolate fountain there's a chocolate fountain and candles in a rose

and then just massive speakers it also in the background on the right side it appears to say twat It does, yeah. Twat. Twat. That is liquid chocolate. Oh, very good.

Thanks. Big fan of the paint job on this one, though. It's badass. Oh, wow. They are garish, aren't they? Oh, holy shit. It's like it's a different time. Traveling at 88 miles an hour or whatever it is.

Exhibit's actually in that one. Yeah. Oh, there he is. He's done. He's quite small, isn't he? It's really disappointed with what's happened. And next to him is the small. more one there that's show and tell yeah there we go you can get the spiders out if he breaks

shit wow that was a great question uh let's move on to the first thing of today who would like to go first i've got a i've got a little thing that i can uh show show you have you now go ahead go on i'm glad i remembered about this little thing because it's i really wanted to bring this to the show and i forgot about it just before we started recording And I was going to tell some story I'd found on the internet that apparently isn't even true. And I was like, oh, God, what am I going to do? It's not even real this story.

And we're about to record, but I've remembered, an anecdote, what done happened to me on the weekend. Okay. Yay. So, Amy and I've been away to Northumberland. And as I say, on the first night we were there, we went to the local pub in the village that we were at because we've been told that they were spacing out very nicely.

And it was, you know, if you're going to go out, once on your stay here that's probably a good ish place to go and we took all the precautions and we signed in and we NHS apt and we washed our hands and so on and so forth and we had a lovely time

and when we sat down we looked at the menu and it was like it was kind of you know there's different tiers of pub food in Britain there's your weather spoons which is bad microwaved bad yeah and there's you know

you can go to really pretentious bistro pubs where it's like, you know, you can get sort of the anus of a sloth or something and it, you know, it's three times baked and it's got a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a mango air on it or something, whatever that is. My favourite. Um, and this was sort of middle tier. It was like, there was some quite, there was like game, game meat on there, you know, um, like seasonal stuff. It wasn't just his, here's the steak and here's the gammon. So we were like, let's treat ourselves, we're on holiday We'll have a starter as well as a main And maybe even a pudding afterwards Oh, you are bad We are bad, we are naughty

But not only did we just order a starter We ordered some slightly Pretentious starters In that we thought we'd have The pheasant parfei Oh my goodness Wow In fact it wasn't parfei

It was a pheasant tureen Which is different to a pheasant parfay parfe in that it's like kind of like dog food really it's like a cold it's in like a square like it's been dropped like they've peeled off the foil and then gone on top of your plate but you ever had steak tartar yeah it's like that because that's not I discovered that wasn't actual steak the hard way yeah Mr Bean makes that mistake well it's good to know that I'm in excellent intelligent company yeah um so we both ordered the the pheasant tureen and it came uh like like parfe wood with sort of toasty stuff that

you put on you put it on like spread it onto toast the tiny bread yeah the tiny bread and there's never enough tiny bread is there no um so we were tucking in and we're like look how look how good we are eating pheasant for starter at the pub and um we were chewing away and like looking at it it was seemed to be like sort of different bits of meat that had been put together like they use different bits of the pheasant you know um because you could kind of see it was different shades and textures throughout the uh the slab and as i'm chewing my way through i suddenly sort of crunch down on this thing that's like really hard and i'm like oh geez it like nearly broke my tooth i was like flip me there's like a bit of bone in here you can you can swear peter

fuck me there's a fucking bone in here um just like a little little fragment of bone so I didn't actually say anything I just sort of bit down on it and silently went in my head and Amy could then see me sort of fishing around inside my own mouth with my tongue

trying to find this bone fragment to like take out and she's like what what are you doing what you're doing I was like oh there's like a bit of bone in here I was trying to find it and I could it was really small like

they kept sort of finding it and then it was like getting lost again inside my mouth until I eventually eventually found it and I took it out and it was really hard. I was like even for bone, this is like very, very hard. And when I put it on the plate, it was a bit of shotgun pellet that had been used to kill the pheasant that I was eating. That is the toriest sentence I have never heard.

Isn't it just? I was like, what the fuck is this? And I've got it, I've got it here. I kept the pellet. Did you talk to the pub people? I debated talking to the pub people Because I think I don't know if shot is still made of lead

Is it? It certainly used to be Lead shot Oh man Surely you wouldn't They wouldn't use it on things they eat Right if there's any chance But anyway let me Let me unwrap it

I've got it wrapped up Because it's like I want to keep it forever The bullet that I nearly swallowed It's only little It's a ball bearing But it's made of metal Of course

And I'm going to see, if I can drop it on the desk, whether you can hear it go. Okay, can we all listen very carefully? Yeah. Did you hear that? Nope. It's being cancelled out. Let me hold my microphone right next to it. Okay.

Oh, yeah, heard that. There it is. That's a pellet. That sounded weighty. We'll give it one more. Oh, my goodness. There we go. So I've now got my own shotgun pellet.

It really is just a little metal ball bearing. And it really hurt to bite down on. Oh, that, yeah, those are a bit hard, aren't they? Jesus, they are. I think you would have got your pheasant for free if you brought it up with the establishment. I really, I thought about it, but I thought, you know, in some ways it's not their fault, is it? They, like, are they supposed to dig through the pheasant every time they kill one? I guess ordinarily

maybe like 99 times out of 100 the pellets just go through the pheasant and out the other end and this one somehow became embedded inside it because I've never had that happen to me before with you know if I've ever had like venison

or you know something like that in a restaurant that's been shot so yeah it was very weird but it happened but I was too British about it I was like I'm not going to say anything I'm just going to keep it

I hate that about this because I once ordered a cocktail and I had some fruit on top of it and the fruit was quite clearly visibly mouldy it was all fuzzy and horrible it took me 15 minutes to pluck up the courage to go and ask for a new one why we like this man if I feel I'm within my rights

to not complain but just bring it to their you know, the establishment's attention. I am emboldened with a courage that I wouldn't normally have. I'm really sorry, but my drink's got mulled in it. I'm so sorry, I don't want to cause a fuss. It is a bit like that. I mean, I don't mind, say, like, you know, I think they didn't bring one of our drinks at first

because we ordered it in a kind of staggered way. And when they eventually brought some food, I said, oh, can I, I think we're still waiting on this drink And I'm like, oh, yeah, sorry. So with certain things, arguably more mundane and, you know, not even worth kicking up a fuss about. I was like, yeah, where's my drink? But when there's an actual bit of maybe lead inside my food, for some reason I didn't. I think to be honest, I think the real reason I didn't complain is that they might want to see the pellet and they might then confiscate the pellet from me.

And I wanted to keep it. So I didn't want to tell anyone about it. souvenir. Oh, that's cute. Wow. You've got it now? Where are you going to keep it? Have you got like a little box for it?

I don't know. Maybe in the fridge. Just to add to food in future if you ever want to relive the experience. I'm going to say you should take it to another pub and just push it into whatever you eat. Oh, what hell, guys? There's still a ball bearing in here from when you shot my fish. Yeah. Oh my God.

There's still a ball bearing in this chip. What the hell have you done? God, Christ. Well, that's amazing. Thank you, Peter. Thank you for sharing that. My Tory experience. My Tory story.

Your Tory story. Very good. We've got another question here, this time from Tommy the Wank Engine at Triggily Saride Tea on Twitter. I recently got very drunk, turned on the shower,

then passed out on the bathroom floor, leaving my new roommate to believe I drowned. Oh my God. What's the worst slash most embarrassing things you lads have done while drinking the devil's drink trademark? Oh my God. Sorry, can we just, can we just all take a moment to picture that scene? Yeah, Tom. His roommate thinking he died.

Was he, were you naked on the floor, Tom? It's impressive. It's impressive. I can kick us off if you want. Oh, please. Yeah? Because Peter was there for some of this. I was thinking about this the other day

when I was driving home and was thinking about the first thing I was going to do when I got home so I think this is what you're about to say Oh what I'm going to do a wee when you got home Yeah yeah no we're thinking the same thing yeah Okay So when Peter and his lovely fiancé

Amy used to live in a different part of Newcastle When we all used to work at what culture We came over A few of us came over from the office to sort of hang out one evening and have some drinks and play some board games and stuff. And I brought a little bottle of vodka with me and I drank a fair bit of it. And I feel like it was only me and Amy who were really drug and everyone else was quite just having a nice time. I was going to say, it was one of those nights where half the room drinks a lot and the other half dozen.

I think Jules as well had a little bit, you know, had a fair bit. And then, yeah, there were like two or three others who were like, Yeah, you guys enjoy. You guys are being loud, aren't you? I think all I remember is Amy and I loudly singing that Persona 5 battle theme. You'll never see it coming, just over and over again. Over and over. And it came time to go home.

Of course, the public transport in Newcastle's pretty good. So hopped down onto the metro, and I was just sat there, really drunk, waiting to get back home. And as sort of about five minutes into the journey, I thought, I have never needed a piss more in my entire life. And I don't think the metro stations have bathrooms at them, or some of them don't anyway. Yeah, most them don't know. So I was like, I can't go on the train. I can't go in the station. Maybe I can just piss in a bush on the way home.

But, and again, Peter can attest to this and maybe Mikey as well. the metro station closest to mine because I moved back in when I came back to Newcastle I moved sort of just around the corner from where I used to live there's not a lot of privacy or hidden areas it's all quite public

Main road buses everywhere yeah so I staggered all the way home the whole time busting for a wee got into my flat unlocked the door got in shut the door behind me threw off my coat open the bathroom door pissed myself he got all the way home yeah the body was just like

oh we're here I was like no I couldn't I just couldn't do it it it was like a foot there was like one foot to go until I was there and I could not I could not make it to the bathroom and I wet myself um you know just for the first couple of seconds and I was like fuck sake and then and then I did the rest in the toilet, but I just couldn't, I just couldn't wait. I was just so excited about going to the toilet that I couldn't hold it anymore. So I'd say, you know, bad things have happened when I've been drunk before, but not, you know, I haven't hurt anyone or hurt myself. Like I know Mikey's injured himself a few times, but that was certainly one that I then, I think I was on a what culture charity stream at like 5am because they were doing a 24 hour one on the

wrestling channel. Excuse me. And I then had to get up, go there. And the first thing I did was say, oh, I pissed myself last night. It was really weird. Because I thought it was really funny. And it is funny, obviously. But I just wanted the world to know. I know, there's several stories you can come out with after being drunk.

A lot of them are like, oh, that's quite funny. If you just come out with, I got so drunk that I pissed myself last night. You just get some concerned looks. It's like, oh, okay. Yeah. That's, I could not imagine the, this, the abject fear in just your whole body in those few seconds leading up to the pissening. Because I, like, I've been in situations like that. Thankfully, I've never got to that point where I've just done a wee or a poo on myself.

But it's like, you're in pain, sweating, clamouring around. Like, it really hurts. Yeah. There is that whole doorstepping contents thing, isn't there, where if you, if you'd been to, five minutes from your house you probably could have lasted longer than you did but because you were there your body's like i'll be able to do it in three seconds so i'm going to give you a three second warning and if you're slower than three seconds fuck you um that used to happen to be like for there was a period of a couple of months where my bodily functions just so happen to line up with when i left school

so i'd get about five minutes away from my house and there's the biggest urge to do a poo would come over me. And it, like, as I kept walking, I'd start running a bit quicker. I'd be palm sweaty, knees weak, pants heavy. You're full of mom spaghetti. Full of mom spaghetti. It's just, it kept happening. It was just the worst. It meant I had to scramble upstairs and run up the stairs, coat off, bag off, just to get, oh, I'm glad my, my cycles changed a bit, because that was not fun. A cycle, yeah. A cycle, yes.

My drunk thing, I'm sure, it's the classic. I've been doing a podcast for more than a year and a half phrase. I must have talked about this before. But here it is. When I was at uni in my second year, these guys who lived in a house not far from us were, it was a 21st birthday party. And we went there and we were playing a drinking game.

And there was a girl there who I had had a few. Yeah, come on. did you do kisses and cuddles um rendezvouss with uh in the past and was still trying to uh stay in with all that kind of uh attention and so we were playing this drinking game and then we were sort of halfway through and she was saying oh i don't really i don't want to really keep playing this like i know that's kind of the point of the game like it's sort of an endurance thing but i don't really want to and i was like hey drink for you as well I got very very drunk one of the last things I had before I started throwing up in the

toilet 11 o'clock in the night when we'd only been there for two hours was some amaretto and now I can never drink amaretto again and I don't like anything that's marsy panny or armandy partly because of that so yeah only a couple

hours into the night I was like throwing up in their in their bathroom and the one person who came and looked after me for a lot of the night was the guy who's birthday was he was like sitting with me while I was vomiting in his bathroom um all of my mates who lived with me went home at like two or three o'clock in the morning without me um and then when it got to when I sort of was able to actually stand up without being sick again I was like okay I'm going to walk home it's just around the corner and again this guy who's birthday it was, was like, I'll make sure you get home.

I'll come and I'll walk back with you. It's like, oh, you don't have to do that, you know, but thanks very much. And as we're walking back, he's saying to me, I really think you should try and eat something when you get in. I know you don't want to. And I was like, no, I'm not going to you. You can't make me. You can't make me.

And he was like, I really think you should. I was like, no, no, no, you can't make me. And as we crossed Halford's car park, he looked down on the floor and saw a paper bag from a bakery. and when he reached into it there was a gingerbread man inside as well as a pack of colouring pencils and like a kiddies's fun pack Did you eat the pencils?

He insisted that I eat the gingerbread man And I was sort of still drunk enough That I was like, fine, whatever And I like gingerbread But I have this memory And I don't know if it's because I do actually remember this or because he told me this after the fact or whether it's even true.

But I have a memory that even there was a leg missing from this gingerbread man. Oh, man. So it wasn't even a fresh, immaculate gingerbread man. So that's one of the worst things I've done. That's bad. I ate a Halford's car park floor gingerbread man. Oh, dear, Peter. Oh, dear.

You still here, so it couldn't have been that bad. Yeah, I don't think I'd do it in today's climate. Let's just say that much. I've just remembered one I remembered it because there's photographic proof of it happening it's a little bit gross so we were at actually I can find the exact time this happened

12th of February 2012 this happened we were at a friend's house party and we thought it'd be a good idea to do the cinnamon challenge and so I took a big old spoonful of that cinnamon and oh boy did it go wrong I've vomited everywhere

I've never seen that happen with the cinema I've never seen anyone react that way it was horrible because it was like the not being able to breathe the coughing and also the vomiting all in one

I've got a picture of at the middle of it it's not that gross but the sink does look a little bit vomiting do you want me to send it yeah would you be okay with us tweeting this depending on how grass it is

absolutely I'll let you judge if it's worthy but you can just see the peat in my eyes you look so unwell oh Jesus I can I can fucking smell it The vodka

The dirty cinnamon spoon The clumpy sink The empty alcohol bottles all around it The dirty spoon is so bad Oh no Okay The worst bit of this is The person's whose house were staying at

His sister got really angry at us But she didn't get angry at me For some reason my friend Who you can see in the background Trying to clear up my mess Got the full front of her force And I got off Scott free Too busy posing for photos

Oh God Look at your fucking face The cinnamon vomit sink Look at it It's oh That's on Twitter now Great thanks Oh man

Jesus That's incredible The lack of context that people are going to have for that while they wait for this episode to come out is just fantastic Please do go and follow us on Twitter at Vidyat's Official If you want to see every time we do

One of these recordings As you probably guess by now There's a thread There's a picture of Dave Benson Phillips That goes up that signals The recording of an episode And then we reply in a thread All the relevant photos

That we discuss as we go so make sure you go and check those out and yeah that's I don't think that's the worst thing I've ever done but that's definitely a highlight

it's a and what a highlight it is Michael your thing oh I've got a lovely thing today have you boys ever heard of Action Park no

oh I was about to say no but I kind of feel like I might have now that you say that I don't know so Action Park was a theme park in America

notorious for how just stupidly dangerous it was and so I've got like a little history of it I've got all the highlights of the shit that went down at Action Park it's one of those things that I'd heard about I knew a little bit about it but I never properly read into it and now that I've read

into it it's like holy crap what went on in this place so I'm going to give you all a little story about the best theme park in the world Eugene Mulverhill Hill was a new journey, new journey, good start, New Jersey businessman with interests all over the place and he found himself in the mid-70s, the sole owner of Vernon Valley slash the Great

Gorge, a ski resort in Sussex County, about an hour's drive northwest of New York City. Mulve Hill faced the dilemma of all ski operators. How do you monetize the property in the warm weather months? His idea drifted towards amusements, but not the standard roller coasters and carousels, but a more self-engaging fare. ski resort company was called Great American Recreation and damn it, Gene Mulverhill was going to recreate in what he considered the American way. I didn't pre-free this. It's okay. He was going to recreate in what he considered the American way. I don't know what that means, but there you go. And thus Action Park was born from this dilemma he was in. It opened on July 4th,

1979 and Gene came up with two opening day promotions that perhaps hinted at his target demographic, a Dolly Parton look-a-like contest and a tobacco-spitting competition. Wow. Off to it a good start. Billy Ray would fit right in. Yeah, that'd be brilliant. Tobacco spitting, Dolly Parton, loving Walrus. As the risk takers started coming to Action Park, Gene built fast and furious,

spreading the gospel with gloriously cheesy commercials that emphasized a live on the edge ambience, kids zooming out of water slides and ramming each other on go-carts. I highly recommend I'm searching Action Park commercial because it is like the most radical, bodacious American thing ever. It's like, I love Action Park. It's sick. Okay. Kids flying off water slides in the background. Okay. When Gene discovered that the force of hitting the water at the bottom of Surf Hill could tear off bathing suits, he took immediate action. By building a grandstand, so spectators

could watch his teenage burlesque show. What? Oh, boy, it's that kind of place. When a local TV reporter filming a live segment on the 70-foot bungee jump refused to take the leap, Andy's younger brother, Christopher, pushed him off the ledge,

and he was acting under instructions from the park's public relations director when he was doing that. So the management already completely messed up, the bravest dudes you'll ever see. The park was definitely a product of a different time, but it helped that Gene was an expert at schmusing investigators and would be investigators. That used to investigate it's twice there. Good writing me. For a while, he even got

away with setting up his own insurance company based in the Cayman Islands. I guess no one else would insure him at this point. Yeah. Eventually, Moverhill opened three action park areas, Alpine Centre, Motor World and Waterworld. What linked to the three lands was this. That chaos was king. The Alpine Centre included the aforementioned slide and bungee jump and later the gladiator challenge, which pitted pugil stick wielding visitors against park employed combatants. On one occasion, a visitor who'd been bopped one many times with the bopping stick of a gladiator returned with a few friends, which prompted the gladiator to get a few of his own fellow warriors. The result was an all-out melee involving several dozen people and when the

Vernon Police eventually restored order. It was all in the day's work for a force that on another occasion had to break up a fight between lifeguards and a group of bodybuilders who'd thrown the guards into the pool. Oh, God's say. This play sounds amazing. In Motorworld, employees learned that sticking tennis balls into the governor devices of the super go-carts and the lower cars allowed them to go much faster than their advertised 20-mile-an-hour speed limit, as high as 50 miles an hour.

What? The battle action tanks were another extremely popular feature. Opponents commanded many rigs and fired tennis ball cannons at one another while getting fired upon two by spectators who paid to shoot them from afar. In the spirit of driving range patrons who aim their shots at the purse sap collecting golf balls, so could the shooters aim at the workers disengaging tangled carts and picking up straight. balls. But it was in water world that things got the most wild and crazy. Some highlights include the Tarzan swing, which swung 20 feet high over a spring-fed pool. And if you let go too early, you could fall onto cushions, but you could also fall into rocks and then

roll into the water. If you held on too long, you could scrape yourself on the concrete on the far side. And if you didn't let go at all, freaked out by the drop, you might swing all the back and tumble into the woods where you started. The thrill injury factor of the aqua scoot was perennally underrated. A rider sat on a plastic sled and went hurling down a 60-foot track slide so fast that he or she skimmed across the pool at the end. In theory, anyway, in practice, if positioned incorrectly, the sled could sink as soon as it hit the water, flinging the rider head first at good speed. The kayak experience closed in 1982 for reasons, that will become clear later on. The Colorado River Ride, according to Simmons, I think of someone who worked at the park, was pure mayhem.

Tubas would fall out of their vessels at the various junctions, one of which presented a tunnel, or clunk their heads on rocks while jumping from one raft to another. Or just generally tackle into each other. I like that language. That's good. The most infamous ride in this section of the park May have been the cannon ball loop A steep enclosed tube slide That fed a 360 degree vertical turn So it's a slide which would do a loop-de-loop

But taken there only by gravity What? Oh no Legend has it that a dummy sent down to test the ride early on Came shooting out headless I think I've heard that before But the ride was ultimately ultimately opened and it worked like this. After climbing 50 feet to reach the top, riders would get hosed down to reduce friction, clamber feet first into the dark shaft and hope they got up enough momentum. Oh my God, Ben's, Peter's P. I just ran a photo over. Look at that. That's ridiculous. I let that to the thread. Oh, please. They clamber feet first into the dark shaft and hope they got off enough, got up enough momentum to negotiate the full loop and come shooting out the bottom.

maybe in the direction they entered maybe not but the greater danger was clearly at the wave pool introduced in 1981 where on hot weekend days as many as a thousand people would wade into a 100 by 200 foot basin in which one of the country's first mechanical wave machines produced a greater than three foot swell the customer base included thousands of the yorkers who could swim but figured they could body surfers would crash into each other in the crowd and strugglers could quickly disappear into the dark bottom. The wave pool was legitimately terrifying, said a crew member, and he was a lifeguard.

Oh my God. Rescues are rare at most ocean beaches, but action park guards made up to 30 a day. It was simply the norm, says Simmons. At one point, staff decided that if a visitor was pulled out, he or she had to wear wristband that read CFS. Can't fucking swim. Well, unfortunately, with the slightly more humorous side of all these injuries,

there was a more real tragedy to the park, as was inevitable when you're doing this pure chaos. On July 8th, 1980, a 19-year-old park employee named George Larson was taken an after-hours ride on the alpine slide when he was flung from the track. He flew about 25 feet, hit his head on a rock, and fell into a coma, and unfortunately died several days later. Jesus. But that's not all. Two summers on, 15-year-old George Lopez.

Wow, there's another celebrity called George Lopez. I'm going to assume it's a different George Lopez. Unfortunately, I shouldn't be joking. He drowned in a wave pool. Very sad. Sorry, George Lopez.

Didn't mean to discredit your good name. A week after that, so not even like a good amount of time between deaths. Jeffrey Nathan, 27, collapsed while riding the Whitewater Coyek experience. He allegedly, suffered an electric shock

triggering a cardiac arrest and died at hospital and there's more deaths but as I'm reading them I don't like getting sadder and sadder how many deaths are you could just tell us

the total number if that would be easier there was six deaths at least in the list I've got and I don't understand how even in like the 70s 80s after one death he wouldn't go

maybe this place shouldn't be open three of them were people drowning in the tidal wave pool apparently three people drowned in the tidal wave pool I think that was the thing about the tidal pool I think a lot of the time

they use salt water to make people more buoyant but in this one they were just using spring water so it just made it so much harder to even be in it God but in truth though most visitors thought more about the daily drumbeat of injuries than they did about the fatalities almost everyone sustained some kind of bang up at action park

it was part of the appeal but sadly it couldn't go on forever because when you kill six people you really should stop, please. Eager young thrill seekers were disappointed in the summer of 1997 when their journeyed to Vernon only to find Action Park's doors closed. With the fraud indictment and other settlements related to various lawsuits, three of them from park fatalities, their problems were piling up.

Great American Recreation, which was reportedly as much as $48 million in debt, had gone bankrupt. And after this, the park was sold onto a new owner who took charge. an action park became mountain creek water park which still open to the stay I think it carries on the spirit of action park but in a considerably safer setting gone is the Tarzan swing

the Colorado River Ride now requires a helmet and of course the wave pool is now far tamer that's the story of action park I know where I've heard of it from now which is the Johnny Knoxville movie I was going to say has it inspired because I'd, yeah, I'd heard about this Johnny Knoxville film, too. Yeah, so there's a TV documentary about it, which I now really want to watch.

But yeah, there was a Johnny Knoxville film about it. Action Point, it was called. Action Point, that's it, yeah, which unfortunately flopped, and it wasn't a very good film. And I read an interview of Johnny Knoxville. He felt really upset about that. He felt he didn't do the park owner's justice. Didn't he legitimately injure himself a few times doing stunts on that film. Oh, yeah.

Let me see. Action Park, John, Knoxville. injuries. Yeah, I think there's several people doing stunts. I think some of the Jackass cast were on it doing real stunts. Let's have a look. I can't find any, but like, yeah, the thing is with Action Park, it was much like Jackass and that it wasn't, like obviously everything was kind controlled and safe, but it was doing pretty death-to-fine things and he got injured, but hey, that's what Johnny Knoxville does best and we love him for it. Absolutely. Wow, Michael, thank you for teaching us about Action Park.

Yeah, do do, do. Incredible. Right. It's time for another question. This one comes from Samuel de Barber at Samuel DeBarber on Twitter. How do you separate yourselves from the production slash content creating pressures? How do you avoid getting caught up in the numbers and the comments and the anxiety of delivering? Hmm.

Oh, that's a fun one. I think I have a genuine issue with YouTube comments in that I've legitimately read every single comment that has ever been posted on a video it's video from the beginning. Really? Do you still do it? Still to this day. Still do it. Really? It's, I don't, yeah, it's insane. Like, at the beginning, I was like checking to make, oh, is everything like going damn well? Make sure everyone's like liking the videos.

And then it just became part of my daily routine. Like, go check the comments, read every single one. And for some reason, even today, I just like to keep tabs on it. And it definitely not a good thing to be doing. As everyone knows, don't do that. Don't read the comments. It's not worth it. But I physically can't pull myself away from it. but I think with Vidiots we definitely kind of did her own thing despite the looming financial doom Yeah, yes yes Yeah that's true

I think that's yeah in a way that's like a whole different thing It's like how how what we did with Vidiots and how we Managed it and stuff but certainly like today I think with certainly with Podiots like I don't worry too much about how well it does Like we we don't have any um outgoing with it really other than like a little bit of hosting every year which it currently more than pays for so you know there's no there's no pressure to make it like do really well it's not a full-time job it's not paying any bills it's just pocket money so um i don't worry about the stats and the

the algorithm or anything like that i obviously want it to do as well as it can but um you know i think um with triple jump of course um i care a lot more about how well things are doing there um But even then, I prefer to look at the numbers, at least, than read the comments. I think I'll read the comments of a new format to see, like, what people think of, like, of that. I think that's useful. I might read the comments occasionally to see, you know, what did we miss out from this list? Let us know in the comments below. Because I think that is useful to know, especially if we're doing, like, a follow-up list.

But, yeah, with a lot of things, I just don't read them. I just stay well away. and uh but other than that like on social media i know some people say that social media broadly speaking they find very toxic and and difficult and it's not good for them um and twitter specifically i've seen a lot of people say i'm taking a twitter break i need a twitter break because it's not good for me and uh you know obviously like everyone um uh responds to this differently and i understand that like some people might find it a very hostile environment but in my personal experience, I've not really had like too many issues with Twitter. So like I'm

fortunate in that the only social media platform I use now is Twitter. I don't use Facebook anymore. And for me, it just seems like actually quite a decent place. I don't find it that depressing any more than just the news is generally. And I'm going to see that on the TV or whatever. So that's not Twitter's fault. But in terms of the way people are with me and the things that we make, I don't really find that too bad. So that's okay for me. We're very fortunate to have some lovely fan bases, aren't we? Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah, I learned pretty immediately at what culture. Just don't look at the comments. There wasn't anything particularly scarring or, you know, upsetting that was in there

that prevented me from ever looking at comments again. But it was just like, wow, comment section in particular the what what culture comment sections yeah were awful just generally speaking they were awful um and so i don't like from that point on i've never ever looked at the comments i've gone in a couple of times you know as peter said with triple jump obviously really care about what's going on there but i don't i don't even look at the new reactions to the new formats i don't um you know look at uh look at the comments whenever i whenever i can really uh like there's no there's no reason i would go in there and if i do i scroll down just far enough to maybe see the top two comments which are the most upvoted ones so they tend not to be awful um but in general

yeah like just stay away from comments the comments are the worst part and um ignorance is very much bliss in that regard it's where most of the toxicity is And if someone's going to be an asshole to you, they're going to be an asshole to you in the comments of YouTube videos. I have maybe on one hand, I can count on one hand the amount of times someone has actively gone out of their way to find me on Twitter and say something nasty to me.

And that was from what culture? I've never had it since. So it just, it says not only does it speak volumes about how much it's worth avoiding YouTube comments, but in a larger sense, it speaks volumes about just how cowardly the people who are being nasty are in that they won't lift a finger to come and tell it to your face. You know, they'll just drop it in a comment section and fuck off and just... They're not trying to be constructive.

No, absolutely not. They don't want to help. They just want to tell you down. So for me, avoiding the comment section is paramount. And, yeah, as Peter said, when it comes to vidiots and polyots now, not too fuss about the numbers. Obviously, we want it to do well. but it's not you know it's it's not make or break for us you know it's not our job whereas triple jump

we're always looking at the numbers and fortunately in the past you know five or six months things have really picked up for us and started to do really well which is fantastic but um you know there's there's still occasionally you know you you'll put out a list that three separate people have worked on whether it be editing writing or doing the voiceover and then you see it top out at about 6,000 views and it's like, why? That sucks. Why is that not done anything? And you know, we've come to the realization. We've discussed it ad nauseum and I'm sure we'll have the same discussion until the end of time. But there's only so many things with YouTube that you can control. And it seems to be sometimes just a fucking lottery if your videos actually

get shown not only to the people who subscribe to your channel, but get shown to people outside. of that base. And it's totally at YouTube's algorithm's discretion and I would say that is probably my only source of frustration and anxiety in terms of producing content for the internet. It's just will it, will this video

we've worked on even be watched by anyone? Yeah. Especially like special stuff. I don't, even like with lists I don't worry too much. You know, again, still want them to do well. But, you know, if a list does cap out or top out at 6,000 views,

it's like oh that that really sucks but you know it's a list and we'll get them next time but when we for example when we read the novelization of the sonic movie in front of a roaring log fire that seemed like such a fun idea and it just didn't do anything and that's like oh man that's like that's an actual shame that that has happened with that idea or you know when we do a when we've done prove it's in the past that you know we've we've worked really hard on the live action challenge um yeah it's like the first let's play episode to get like what 10 15000 views and then the final live action on which we'd spend days working on yeah forget about eight it's like oh cool yeah yeah that's the whole point of the format is really just leading up to the the grand finale and it's like

oh watch the what's the first 30 minutes of gameplay and not watch the good bit yeah um yeah yeah i think i think the uh the the the sort of if you if you can avoid if you really need you really need to be able to separate the performance of what you're making giving you anxiety. When I say anxiety, I mean in the general sense of just like frustration from people being nasty to you on the internet because people are assholes. You know, if you can separate those two things, then you're, you're probably going to find it a lot more manageable. And in terms of people being assholes on the internet, you can look at the reasons why

are you, are people being assholes to you because you're reading. YouTube comments, then maybe it's time to stop reading YouTube comments. Are people being assholes to you because just by virtue of you being on Twitter, then maybe it is time to take a break from Twitter. You know, you just got to cut stuff out to, you know, avoid the assholes where you can, especially if you're committed to making this kind of stuff. It's just reminded me of my nephew had a YouTube channel for a bit. He do like gameplay videos.

You do videos about all these Pokemon plushies and all that. And the other month, I was like, oh, I'll go check in, see if he's done any new YouTube videos. And then I go check the About page. And the description of his now abandoned YouTube channel is, no, I hate YouTubeing. It's not for me. Sorry.

Brilliant. Amazing. Bless him, he tried. He tried. One for this red, surely. No context. that's great I it's it's it's been

beaten to death but as always make make the content for you especially if this is just a hobby yeah um like you just cannot go into it expecting success because when it doesn't happen it'll only lead to anxiety frustration stress it it it if if you focus on doing something like oh I want to

play around with this let's try this let's like just have some fun with this let's try something new let's learn something new and put that in a video focus on that I think that you can tell when the heart goes into a video when like it's something you really care about and you put a lot of work into it. And if you start like going down the easy route of trying to fish reviews, then it doesn't become your work. It doesn't have your personality. And then also it's just like just do you? Have fun. But yeah.

If you're in a liberating state of not having to rely on it financially, just have fun. Yeah. Have fun. Absolutely. Indeed. It's time for my thing. It is. Guys, there is drama in the queer penguin community.

Oh no, not the queer penguins. This is a news story from Thecut.com. And it is quite a rollercoaster. Here we go. Drama is afoot in the Dutch queer penguin community after two gay lovers with a reputation for trouble stole an entire nest of eggs from a neighbouring lesbian couple at the same zoo.

Oh my god! Within the queer penguin community at large, fostering eggs is relatively common. On multiple occasions, zoos and aquariums have gifted unhatched eggs to gay and lesbian couples exhibiting behaviour that suggests they're desperate for a chick, like building mock nests out of pebbles,

which is obviously adorable. Cute. But rather than demanding the same of their caretakers, one pair of African penguins at the Dairan Park Zoo in Amosphor Instead took the matter into their own claws by snatching eggs from two mothers to be. The conniving boys have since been sharing caregiving duties, taking turns keeping the eggs warm and foraging for fish.

Aw, that's kind of cute. What's more? This isn't the first time the fellas have resorted to unlawful action. Just last year, the same couple stole an egg from a different penguin family and faced zero repercussions for doing this. for doing so. It's no wonder, after that egg didn't hatch, they felt emboldened to steal again. Meanwhile, the female penguins have no recourse, it says.

While the lesbian couples are the... Sorry, while the lesbian couple are the victims here, it's unlikely the boys will get the happy ending they so desperately desire. According to the zookeeper, there's a decent chance that the stolen eggs were never fertilized, meaning chicks may never hatch from them. When you think about it, it's really quite sad for all penguin involved. Hopefully the zookeepers will step in and give everyone free eggs soon. God. Free eggs, free eggs. We'll go down there and protest, please. So there we are.

Two gay penguins have stolen a whole load of eggs from two lesbian penguins and they're now looking after the eggs but it's unlikely that they'll hatch. I can see the wild, discourse now. Person A says, ooh, being gay is unnatural. Person B says, hey, what are you talking about? It happens in nature? Look at these penguins. They're gay and they want to like

foster an egg. Person A says just proves that gay people are out to steal babies. You know, it's naturally in them. That's what they want to do. All those baby napping gay people. This is the definitive

proof of that sentiment. Yes. Because a penguin did it in a zoo. A penguin did it. This is the future liberals want. I like how it's not the first time the penguins have done it. Yeah. And apparently they weren't even shamed for it enough last time, so they thought it was okay. Have you seen that zoo that does like naughty penguin of the week and best penguin of the week?

Oh, no, I haven't. Yeah, I think I think I'm dead. I'm just going to find one and send it through. So, let's have a look. Penguin of the month was Moore who perfected the art of fish stealing and even takes it out of other birds' mouths. Wow.

That's a good thing, is it? Sorry, that was the naughty penguin. And the good penguin was being a good moral, was Flip, being a good role model, swims well, eats nicely, and knows how to penguin. You can say fuck, Michael. You know, it's, it's poddiots.

Flip. Fuck the penguin. Yeah. that's a great name for a penguin I'm going to do one more we've got naughty penguin of the month was Bernie he's learning bad habits from more pecking the others in the face during feeding

and Draco was the good penguin for standing up for Timmy when Tux is trying to push him off the pier Oh that's good Oh I want to work in a penguin enclosure It sounds amazing Just making up stories based on the actions of these wild animals

oh man incredible thank you for sharing the dutch LGBT penguin community yeah well I'll keep you posted on the drama in the queer penguin community I'm assuming it's just going to escalate in ever larger hijinks between these two couples and I am very excited to find out what's going to happen next it reminds me the naughty penguins reminds me of a story I read the other day about a swearing parrot in a zoo that's had to be moved to indoors away from the public and they said oh yeah this this parrots learned bad language and we've had to like move it away from public display into like the back where we keep some other parrots and the quote from the zookeeper was something like we're hoping that the good parrots behavior will rub off on the foul-mouth parrot otherwise I will end up with 12 bad-mouth parricks and I don't know what I will do at that point it was just the sort of the air of like

if that happens I'm totally fucked you know like they've missed a trick there that you don't shove them away in the back room

you give them their own exhibit and make people pay a quid 18 plus only to go see the swearing parrot yeah that's a moneymaker right there yeah I want to see a parrot say shit

amazing right we've got one final question this comes from Harvey Latham at R.V. Latham 197 on Twitter with different capitalizations of each letter for some reason.

Wild. Brian Butterfield has COVID. It's a Sunday and he's feeling sick due to Saturday Treat Day. You are all trapped in quite a big room but you can't escape. So for now... Why does it sound like it was written by Brian Butterfield?

It does sound very Butterfield, isn't it? Brad Butterfield has COVID. It's a Sunday. and he's feeling sick due to Saturday treat day. You are all trapped in quite a big room, but you can't escape, so for now you're safe. But Mr. Fluffy Ruffs is coming towards you very slowly. How do you fight off this massive loud boy?

I maybe just remind him that Sunday is rest day, and he shouldn't be coming towards us at all. I've just tried to look up the different Butterfield businesses There's a Butterfield Business Park in Luton. Wow. Wow. Where they're all based. Yeah, Stuart Butterfield, Wikipedia.

That's not what I want to look at. Cold Al. Oh, there's the Butterfield Business Group. Wow. I just want to... That must be terrible for people trying to Google them. Brian Butterfield Businesses. Brian, there's a LinkedIn. Hang on, okay.

I just need to confirm this. yeah right so someone's made a LinkedIn profile Brian Butterfield businessman at Butterfield Industries if you would like to contact me about myself this this internet website

Butterfield Industries the Butterfield Diary the Butterfield Celebrities what is this this was and then it just ends with then please and then there's a colon Wow okay so I think I've got a list of all

business is here. Okay. So, okay, I think some of these are fake. The Butterfield Loft Insulatory Services. I don't remember that YouTube video. Okay, no, never mind. I was going to say maybe there's a relevant business

that we could just sort of remind Brian that he needs to be, you know, perhaps tending to. Like the Butterfield Hotel. Oh, I've got one. I've got one. Go on. I'm on the Wikipedia page, and it turns out Brian Butterfield had a speaking clock service. So we just tell him, oh, I want to know the time every second.

Yeah. So then he's forced to not interact with us, but sit in the corner and just say the time every second. Is that the one where they ring him up and he looks at the clock and just says, it's about quarter to three, it sort of makes a vague guess. I think so. Around, around guess. what about if we use the clock in the room you know it's quite a big room

so there might be a clock in it if we wound it back so it's Saturday do you reckon he'd just keep eating oh he might do yeah if there's a calendar or something yes we could also ask him what's on the menu

at the Butterfield Restaurant because the menus haven't been delivered yet but he will do his very best to remember yeah if you ask him he'll do his very best to remember Yeah, if you ask him, he'll do his very bust. And that might, again, distract him for a short time, especially if all of the meals available on the diet plan are, you know, on the menu. Yeah.

I have to try and remember them all. He would. That would be amazing. Maybe ask him to show off his collection of celebrity outfits or impersonations, you know, that he does. The hats, yeah. Lord's Mayor Crupey. Loads of different ones. Get him to sing some karaoke, perhaps.

I've just, in the Wikipedia page, I didn't know this. I don't know if you know it, but apparently Brian Butterfield is kind of based on a real-life person. Is it? Really? Yeah. The actor Basil Soper, who was in the Personal Injury Helpline Adverts, and it's, I'm just, I was just about to listen to an advert, and it sounds amazingly similar. Oh, my God. It does just sound like him, isn't it?

Oh, God, yeah. Oh, Jesus. It looks like him. too. I'm amazed that he ripped that off so shamelessly. He's got the same hair, the same moustache. I feel but

it is the same. That's incredible. About just about nine seconds he says now there's no need to worry but he definitely says no need to worry. So I've got the the D-N beginning of now. Nothing taken from the

money you're rewarded. It's all the All the sort of emphasis is the same. Yeah. Oh, that is amazing. Can't believe Brian Butterfield is a real person. I'm just going to quick, for the benefit of people at home, I'm going to quickly open it on my phone and just play it through the microphone so people can actually hear it.

It's like I'm not, I'm not mad at the existence of that. I'm just kind of really impressed at how close it is. The linked, the related videos is the clip when he was on shooting stars and he falls off his chair. It's brilliant. Okay, here we go. Here's the video. Have you been injured, had an accident at work, or on the road, or in a public place? I'm sure if you have a claim for compensation, concerned about hidden charges. Now, there is no need to worry.

The personal injury helpline will handle your claim with no charges and nothing taken from the money you're awarded. So, for a risk-free, quality service, call us free now on 0-800-085-17. if you don't make the call you'll never know I'm really upset they don't have a website for double double the comments are amazing people have put bread and have deltoids

and uh just please bear with me as I'm the only one banning the phones Lord Merspropier Brilliant she slipped and fell badly bruising her back in both buttocks That's fantastic Artificial Sweet though

That's so good what a discovery that's great wow okay well there we go ending on a high there thank you everybody for your things and also people at home

for your questions what is it that I read here here it is store.orgscast.com we've got some merch there if you'd like to consider maybe buying some there's some potty at stuff too isn't that right Mikey

oh absolutely right if you head over to store.orgscast dot com you can find a lovely selection of beautifully crafted vidiates merch including t-shirts

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Did so many streams on videos and it's been ages since I've done one now. Yeah, it's time to come back with a vengeance. Yeah, so twitch.tv.4.2.3.3.5.com. It's official if you want to check us out there. Streamlabs.com forward slash potty at Stonation with a question mark, with an S on the end is what I meant to say. Donate three pounds or more.

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Invest in hamster cheese and the lovable KZ or Kazi. Thank you very much, everyone. That's your pod squad for this week. Once again, three pounds or more. Streamlabs.com forward slash poddy at Stonations. We love you very, very much. Mikey, where can people find you on the internet? Best to find me at Parrot Boy on the Twitters,

where I occasionally post funny things and nice things. Skeletons, that's the last thing I've posted. So go and enjoy that. I'm also, as I'm sure we're getting to, we stream sometimes on Twitch.tv, forward slash videos official. I stream somewhat regularly, occasionally sometimes. So keep your eye out on the Vidyat's Twitter for when I'm streaming and also on my own Twitter.

Thank you, nice. But you should change your bio to, no, I hate YouTubeing, it's not for me. You definitely should. Peter, where can people find us? We are at Confused underscore Dude and at That Peter Austin on Twitter, but more importantly,

we're over a team triple jump on YouTube and Twitch and Twitter, where we're doing some formats that are very videotic in the sense that Rules Boss is still around, we're playing terrible games, as we're doing live action challenges, we're cooking things. We're not doing all those things right now

because there's a pandemic happening. You might have heard about it. But that's what we have done. There's a big back catalogue. And we will eventually resume doing. Absolutely. Finally, leave us an iTunes review or a review slash rating on your platform of choice.

It helps something to do with Al Gore's rhythms. Thank you so much, everybody, for coming along. Do we have a final question for the people at him? If you were a naughty penguin of the month, what would you have done? That was so naughty. We don't want to hear any of that good shit. Give us the naughty stuff. Yeah.

You'd be nice. We need to push off the cliff. Go on, tell us. Go on. We won't tell. We will. Thank you, everybody. Look after yourselves and we'll see you next time.

Bye. Bye-bye. Thank you. I don't know I'm going to be able to me. No. Thank you.